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#because i'm meant to be working at the same time.
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𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 ── Part 2
Click here to read the first part.
Summary: In the hopes that things would improve between you, you choose to lose your virginity to your friend Dean Winchester because you have been in love with him madly for a long time. However, he doesn't feel the same about you.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x F!Reader
Warnings: +18! (Minors DNI),smut, unrequited love, angst, reader gets hurt, arguments, jealousy
Word Count: 5896
A/N: English is not my first language.
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Dean hung out on the second floor with his new girlfriend while you and Sam watched TV. There were no audible voices. Well, you couldn't hear anything that far away, at least. You couldn't stop your mind from concentrating on them, even if you didn't want to. Your head hurt from the mix of the TV's sounds and the rain. Actually, the pain was in your soul.
You waited for regret to surface so you could condemn and despise yourself for opening yourself to Dean, your friend. But despite your best efforts, you were unable to sense remorse. You knew that you would do it again if you had a chance, taking back all that happened. How could you refuse him? You wished to memorize every moment of that night by being able to see every expression on his face. It was ridiculous that something so basic could no longer be made possible. The moments you spent with him are now only vague memories in your mind. All you could recall was the touch—his touch. It was still lingering on your skin. That would be enough.
It was clear to you from the way he laughed with her moments ago that the moment you had spent with him days before meant nothing. It was simply another hookup for Dean. Though you didn't think you'd reveal the truth from your side, you wondered what Sam would say about it. Sam was a good man, but you really weren't supposed to reveal to him that you slept with his brother since it would be too embarrassing. Additionally, you had given your virginity to his brother, whom you referred to as a "friend." There was no way you could tell him this.
You couldn't even recall the name of the show that was on TV. From time to time, Sam cracked up at the jokes. At least one person was feeling good. You looked at him attentively and observed that he had his attention on the show while he ate his popcorn.
He turned to face you, seeing your serious expression as he observed how you were reacting to the joke. In your arms, you held a pillow.
He said, “What's that look?”
“Seems like someone is enjoying, huh?”
“Why not? We all deserve a little relaxation after working so hard as hunters, don't you think?” He remarked, grinning, and turned down the TV. The instant the room was silent, you realized how much the noise had hurt your head. 
“Like your brother?” Compared to what you had anticipated, you sounded more serious. 
“Dean being Dean, you know.” Sam sighed and made a quick statement. Yes, you were aware of it. 
“How is your arm, by the way?” you said with a troubled look on your face. You've been feeling terrible for Sam because he kept you protected throughout the hunt and then ended up hurting himself. He was always considerate and cautious of you and Dean. It was in his nature. 
Sam smiled reassuringly and said, “It's fine. You know, things go wrong, and as long as you save the day, it's alright to get a little bit hurt.”
Stating, “I didn't want to get distracted that easily. I'm not sure what's wrong with me these days, but I promise I'll get better.” The claim that you were acting in this way without knowing why wasn't true. You were certainly aware of the exact cause of your growing distraction. 
If only Sam could read your mind and understand. Otherwise, there was no way for you to tell him straight what happened between you and Dean that night. You had any, yet deep down you needed to talk to someone. But you were very, really embarrassed. It's not like you were teens; you and Dean are grown ups. Reasonable ones, obviously. On the other hand, exposing your situation to him would be the same as declaring your love for him and would reveal your feelings for him.
“Really, Y/N, it's all right. What is done is done.” Sam looked at you, totally shutting off the TV. “Ignore what Dean said. You know how protective he is all the time. If you were the one who was harmed by me, he would say the same things. Though he may have come off as tougher, his intentions were good.”
"I'm afraid that's not true, Sammy. I mean, I know his intentions were good, of course, but I guess I touched his nerves this time for real.”
You attempted a smile, but it did not reach your lips before you realized Sam was trying to soothe you.
Sam replied awkwardly, “He cares way too much about the people he really cares about.” At these meaningless remarks, you both halted for a little period of time. “Well, it wasn't the best way to put it, but you get the idea. You might understand if you were raised by an older brother. He's not a bad person; there are just moments when I don't understand him.” 
“Of course not,” you cut him off right away. “You don't even have to say it. Don't get me wrong; I'm not saying anything negative about him. I would never.”
“I know, I know...” Sam spoke quickly. “Still, I'm simply advising you not to think too much about what he said previously, all right? We've been hunting for more than a year; it's not that he doesn't like you. Remember that a year ago, it was he who offered the invitation for you to join that team?”
You ultimately nodded as Sam attempted to convince you that Dean didn't mean to hurt you. 
“Yes,” you murmured to yourself. “Considering how often you two sustain injuries, a nurse would be beneficial. I wonder if Dean was looking for a nurse for himself and his little brother, or if he was looking for someone with hunting abilities.”
“Let's say you're just talented enough to take a part in that very humble team,” Sam laughed. “And you're being a nurse is just another plus.” 
You sighed and then gave him a genuine smile, saying, “Fine, if you say so.” You had finally been somewhat diverted from your thoughts about Dean and his girlfriend by a brief conversation with Sam. 
Curious, you said, “How about you and Ruby, by the way? It seems that you two have become a very good couple, haven't you?”
“We're looking for something…to work out. But it's okay for now,” Sam remarked hesitantly. You found it amusing that he was so forthright about everything else than relationships. 
“You seem to be very much in love.” Not knowing how to present the matter to Dean without taking any suspicion, you offered an innocent glance to Sam. Sam was smart in every other way. Sometimes he observed and gazed at people as though he could see right through them. 
“She's like no one I've ever met,” Sam said timidly. “I think it will take some more time to work it out, but it's fine so far.”
“I'm glad to hear that.”
“How about you?”
You hesitantly replied, “What?” as he sent you one of his suspicious stares. 
“I've been thinking about lately and come to know... that it has been a year and I didn't even see you with anyone. That seems a little odd, don't you think?” Sam arched an eyebrow. “Are you not seeing anyone, or are you keeping it as a secret or something?”
You shifted on the seat and hugged the pillow against your arms a bit extra to help you unwind. In the end, he knew nothing about Dean or you. There was no reason to be anxious. It was only chitchat. 
“No, of course not!” You stopped him off before he started asking his questions. “It isn't... I'm not interested in anyone right now.”
“Really?” With a look of suspicion, Sam inquired. “We met other men throughout the cases, and they seemed to be interested in you. How can you tell whether you're interested in one of them if you don't give it a shot?”
“Sam, I don't like hookups. Something like that is not what I want.” However, you've turned into Dean's one hookup. The thought briefly ripped through your soul, given how little you've been talking recently, as if there were an unambiguous wall between you that you could not break down no matter how hard you tried.
“That's not what I'm saying. I'm just trying to get the point that you should give people a chance to win you over. How in the world would you know if you liked someone or not without that?”
“I don't want to,” you interrupted, concentrating solely on Dean. It would be simpler to get Sam to understand you if you could tell him how you feel about Dean. 
Sam groaned and said, “Fine. It was just an advice.” 
“I know, thanks,” you responded, putting on a timid grin. “Will you continue to watch TV for a while? It's growing late.”
Sam said, “I think I will,” as he looked at his watch. “Are you leaving?” 
You said quietly, “Yeah,” as you peered out the window to see the weather. It was pouring. You would have hated sunny days even more if you had gotten intimate with Dean on a sunny day. Rainy weather used to be something you enjoyed, but now it just hurt.
“I think it's better if you stay though,” Sam said, taking a deep breath and using one of his fingers to show you the pouring rain. “You're not the best driver.”
With a harsh tone, you said, suddenly tossing the pillow over his face. “Did you just insult me?”
“That's not insulting,” Sam shot it back at you. “I'm just saying that you're no Hamilton.”
You said, “You have no idea,” and you couldn't help but smile as you recalled the day Dean forbade you from driving on rainy days after you nearly had an accident. Dean continued to get anxious when it started to rain while you were driving because of that day. His Baby was more important than anything. 
“Will you be watching TV or?” Taking back the remote control, Sam asked. 
“No, thanks; enjoy yourself.” Setting the pillow down next to the coach and stretching your arms, you yawned. 
You couldn't help but notice the agonizing heavy feeling in your chest as it began to flare up again like tiny needles as you made your way upstairs. Even though you didn't want to hear anything, you were listening for any sounds coming from Dean's room. As you passed, your movements almost seemed to slow down, but you quickly realized what was going on, and you entered the dark room where you would be spending the night, as if your brain didn't want to hear anything.
You had been repeatedly asked to leave the same house by Dean and Sam and start to live with them, but for whatever reason you were unaware of, you had refused. If they repeated the offer, you would most likely take it immediately. God, even if you just lived in the same house, you would probably fall even more in love with Dean. During hunts, it was even sufficient to see him for a few hours. Your heart ached to think about his face, his grin, and every joke he ever told.
Has the night some weeks ago caused you to ruin what you had? You didn't feel any regret, but as you noticed that Dean was becoming more aloof, regret started to consume you.
You'd just gotten out of the shower when your hands found one of Dean's t-shirts. You desired to wear it like you had some weeks prior. Back then, it wasn't a big deal; instead of complaining, he would just make jokes about how little and amusing you looked in them. But things were different today, and you knew it wouldn't be proper to wear it while he had a girlfriend.
If he truly had affections for someone, you didn't want to spoil things for him.
They laughed a little too loudly as you lay down on the bed and pressed his t-shirt against your chest as if it would bring him further closer. Dean's laughter mixed with Jo's. You tried, devastated, to focus on the soothing sounds of the falling rain and on the absurd or hazardous situations that had transpired during the hunts. It was useless. 
That was the moment you became aware of how really alone you were. Perhaps Sam was correct about telling you to pursue a romantic connection. However, how could it be possible when you were already deeply in love with someone? Anytime Dean was around, your heart felt like it was going to explode. You had no idea how to handle things like that. 
You set his shirt down and let it fall to the ground, acting as if doing so could shield you from the overwhelming feelings that Dean had given you. God, how could you possibly let go of your feelings for him when you couldn't even let go of a single piece of fabric with ease? 
You were so miserable and pathetic that you were unable to stop crying this time. You dreamed of something you could never have as the tears flowed down your cheeks and onto the bed. You will always cherish the beautiful memory the night gave you, but at what cost?
You were sobbing, but you weren't sure if it was from the noises Dean and Jo were making or from the dreams that could only have come true in your head. 
Your impulse to pick up Dean's t-shirt from the floor gradually vanished as your tears dropped to the bed and the pain consumed your entire being. Until today, you had no idea how much you actually loved him. 
“What happened?” With a big smile on her face, Jo placed her fingers around Dean's face and inquired in between laughter. She teased this thick neck with a quick, playful kiss. On his lap, she became still. 
Dean's fingers raised her skirt and were ready to push her underwear aside. Jo continued moving on Dean's lap, making herself wetter by rubbing herself over Dean's boxer, her hands lingering on his wide and bare chest with desire. 
“Nothing,” a rough-voiced Dean said. From the room where you were staying, he thought he heard something. He had heard you took the upstairs before he'd gone to the bathroom. You most likely made the decision to stay since it was pouring rain outside. You definitely didn't know how to drive in such conditions. He shuddered, remembering when you nearly crushed his baby and sent it to his sweet vehicle burial. 
Jo touched Dean's naked chest and paused her palm at his abs, saying, “You seem to be like thinking something else.”
“I wasn't,” Dean lied. It was not significant at all, so there was no need to provide details.
“I was just thinking though,” Jo said, attempting to find the right words to say. 
“About?”
“I think we'd be a great team, you know.” With a sly smile, Jo continued to stroke Dean's abs with the tips of her fingers. “As you are aware, Sam, you, and I would make an excellent team since we are now somewhat of a family, since I am also a hunter. Do you not think?”
Dean moved slightly on the bed, thinking of you, irritated at Jo's disregard for you, as if the details weren't even important. You were a member of the team. He was the one who initially made the offer to you in fact. Besides, they weren't even paired up. He said nothing about it so as not to hurt her feelings or make her feel humiliated if she brought it up. 
“How about Y/N?” In an attempt to lighten the mood and soften the air, Dean attempted to smile at her, but his smile did not reach his lips.
“She's a nurse,” Jo said, as if it were an insult. Dean felt uncomfortable and uneasy because Jo was attempting to push out the details of what she truly wanted to say about you. Despite her best efforts to seem polite, she came out as cunning and bitter. That was something Dean did not appreciate. 
“So?” Dean arched an eyebrow in questioning. “She is the only one still alive due to the terrible things that went wrong; her family was full of hunters just like ours. She doesn't even need to, yet she still has passion. That's very encouraging, in my opinion. I mean, continuing to work in the family business while also doing her professional job responsibilities. That requires guts.”
“Are you defending her?”
“I am,” Dean said in a firm and harsh manner. Jo was still on top of him, trying to get him to say nasty things about you, and he didn't enjoy her attempts at distracting him with handiwork. Dean felt unease and a strong sense of aggressiveness.
He never explicitly expressed his admiration for you for persevering through everything and for having the guts to face your fears. Jo recognized how much he genuinely admired you in his heart when he explained how excellent you were at what you did. Even though you occasionally were easily sidetracked, you were a professional.
Jo sighed, but she didn't give a damn about Dean's opinion of you. In the end, you posed no threat. For nothing at all. 
“I don't think your dad raised you and Sam for doing some charity to the orphan hunters and helping them to find a belonging,” Jo said. Although she made an effort not to seem cruel, it was the reality for her. “I am aware of the danger she took for Sam when you all were hunting last time. It is a weakness to be easily sidetracked in this.”
Dean's eyes grew enraged as Jo carried on speaking in a sinuous manner. She was aware of his dislike of others discussing the persons they cared about in this way. Particularly about the people he respected and gave enough thought to. 
Dean whispered, “Jo,” but it seemed more like he was threatening her. “Stop this fucking nonsense now. I'm serious.” 
“Do you have a soft spot for her or something?” Jo inquired once again. She also bit her lips invitingly while gently raising her skirt to reveal her pussy to Dean's gaze in an attempt to divert his focus elsewhere.
Her eyes were full of promise. In particular, Dean found it amusing when ladies looked at him with such passion. 
Dean immediately felt a sense of relaxation as his hands moved to her hips. He sighed and refused to answer. “Are we just going to talk?” he asked. She began removing her clothes rapidly while he licked his lips and observed. 
“Hopefully not,” Jo laughed in response. She was relieved that she and Dean had stopped talking about you. “Let our bodies talk in their very own, divine language.”
Dean switched the positions before she could say anything more. Now that he was on top of Jo, he was urgently kissing her while his mind was racing with ideas he wanted to put down for the night. 
Dean roughly spread Jo's legs wider and pulled her underwear aside, freeing himself from his boxer. With a single forceful shove that caused them both to moan loudly, he gave his firm cock a few strokes and pushed himself in Jo beforehand. That was an excellent way to get some real comfort now. 
Jo hadn't kept it low at all, so Dean put his hands on her mouth to silence her, causing her to sigh into his hands without intending to wake anyone. He picked up his speed and began to push into her rough and fast enough to satisfy both of them, knowing that she enjoyed being fucked raw and fast and that Dean also wanted to find his release. 
While he continued to fuck her, Dean warned her to "keep it low," suppressing his own groans.
She was, however, loudly groaning in Dean's hands, locking her legs around his hips, matching his speed as she raised her hips, as if she wanted everyone to know that she was getting fucked by Dean. Dean warned her to turn down the volume once more, but it didn't help.
In an attempt to find his release, Dean thrust into her more quickly, giving the impression that he was being forced to come—as if this were a mission or one of his hunts. He was striving to find his pleasure when he felt nervousness take over his body. He wasn't accustomed to feeling this way, especially around women.
His other hand tightened on Jo's tits, and he ran his fingers through her ass to help himself. His movements were forceful and impatient. All he wanted was for her to be somewhat silent so that he could focus more easily. It wasn't like Dean liked to be all crazy harsh on ladies or anything; he just needed to experience the closeness of a true, sincere touch, which was difficult to find at the moment.
He was on the verge of getting there, but he was unable to seize the ideal moment of pleasure and find relief.
Though it wasn't appropriate to think about it right now, Dean's thoughts began to form around the moment he and you had shared weeks earlier as he continued to stroke his hardness into Jo's warm pussy while muttering under his breath. It was as though his body had a mind of its own and knew when it was best for him to get what he was looking for.
His thoughts were hopelessly consumed by the sensation of your tightness and those moments of adorable small sounds that you attempted to hide from him. Dean attempted to concentrate on the woman who he was actually fucking into, not feeling proud of how he thought about you while he fucked Jo into the covers. Thinking about how he fucked you wasn't fair to no one at all. But his own body, which was attempting to steal what it desired by using Jo's body, was not under his control.
Him fucking Jo was becoming a battle between Dean's body and mind. Pleasure and reason; soul and mind.
Jo began to quiver instead of groan loudly, and as Dean withdrew his fingers from her lips, she cried out, “Will you come inside?” 
Dean instantly said, “No,” realizing that he hadn't been wearing a condom throughout his frantic sex with her. “Stay still.”
With a hint of rage, Dean sank his fingers into Jo's flesh and his head into her sweating neck, fiercely shutting his eyes. He was going insane as he struggled with his own thoughts, which were attempting to recall every little detail about your body and how you responded and tightened around his member. He didn't want to go back in time mentally and get pleasure thinking about the night with you while he was inside someone else. It wasn't fair for any. 
It was just an impulse decision made in the heat of the moment. Still, Dean's mind continued seeing the body underneath him to be yours, making him picture every single detail of how he took you and how you immediately clenched around him the moment he entered you. He was taken aback by how tight you were; you were like anyone he had ever fucked. 
As the fantasies overtook his thoughts, Dean became aware of his surroundings as Jo began to speak dirty to him, telling him how much she enjoyed it when he gave her such an aggressive fuck. Dean wasn't aware of himself till now that he started to fuck into her pussy quicker and harder.
Dean's body tensed as his eyes opened. He was pushing his cock in and out of Jo without intending to get off as he thought about you. He was a little caught by what had transpired in a split second. 
Jo gasped and said, “Why did you stop?” To regain his attention, she raised her hips higher. 
“Nothing,” Dean said, losing his temper and collapsing to his side as he felt his cock gradually soften. 
Jo was bewildered, but she became enraged when Dean abruptly quit fucking her and left her feeling unsatisfied. 
She sighed and said, “You want me to get on top?” although she sounded more like she was frustrated. 
“No.”
“What the hell is your problem?” she said, nailing Dean's chest. “Come on-”
“I said, 'no.' Alright?” In an attempt to disassociate himself from Jo, Dean stated. Even though he knew it was just about him, he tried to keep his cool down despite feeling like rage was taking him.
When she realized Dean wasn't in the mood and was most likely experiencing some sort of dysfunctional erection, she simply remarked, “Anyways,” without caring about it at all. “I promised to go out with some friends tonight, you know,” she said, putting on her clothes again.
“Alright. It's pouring outside though.”
“Yeah, and?”
With a sigh, Dean said, “Nevermind,” understanding that you were the only on who found driving in such weather difficult.
Dean quickly showered right after Jo departed the house, then jerked off just after he entered the bathroom. Even if things started to seem strange with Jo, his body still wanted some release to ease the tension. He was horny and furious at the same time. Though he was a man of action and he wasn't the biggest fan of taking himself in hand in the shower like a teenager, it worked this time. It felt good enough.
Dean gasped in frustration, picturing your gentle touches and the way he felt within you while he fucked Jo and how he thought about you while. The easiest way for him to regain control of his body was to stop. That was all—him and you were simply pals who took pleasure from each other for one night. You were lovely, so it wasn't that he wouldn't want to fuck you again, but it would just be weird. That was not Dean's type of thing. 
With one arm folded behind his head, Dean lay on the bed and tried not to think too much. Perhaps he was simply too exhausted.
Even though you were exhausted, your body woke up in the middle of the night due to a headache and a dry throat. You walked silently downstairs to the kitchen so as not to wake Sam, Dean, or his girlfriend. 
You cursed yourself for being so emotional and sensitive, crying your eyes out till you went to sleep. Perhaps you were about to have your monthly period very soon. You were forced to put on your headphones by Dean and his companion in order to block out the noises they created all night.
What a waste, you thought. Believing that once you committed yourself to Dean, things would improve between you two. The situation became worse because of it. There was now such a strong and lengthy barrier between you that, despite your best attempts to remain composed, you were unable to climb it at all without being exhausted. If you were more courageous than this, you would have let everything pass by, turned your back to the team, and concentrated on your actual work. 
After turning on the light and rubbing your swollen eyes, you sipped your water and sat down next to the window. You couldn't even get enough sleep, and you had to work all day. You required a long vacation. 
As soon as you placed the glass down on the kitchen sink, you turned around and saw Dean staring back at you. He was half nude, wearing just sweatpants; his broad chest was all naked. You jumped and gasped in fear because you didn't hear him approaching. 
Dean seemed a little confused for a moment when he saw your ruined hair and swollen eyes, but he said nothing. 
He stated, “You're so jumpy,” in a low voice as if another person may hear them. 
You paused in front of Dean and said, "I didn't hear you coming," but all you did was stand there and remain still, your heart racing. 
Ignoring him and returning to your room was difficult. Though your soul ached and yearned for more time with him, your mind knew that nothing would happen between you.
“Why are you still awake?”
You suddenly snapped, “Why are you questioning me?” but then you added, “I was thirsty.”
He said, “It makes us two,” and grabbed a glass of water for himself.
Can't help but notice how you looked, he remarked, “Your eyes appear somewhat swollen.” He couldn't help making a comment this time, a sense of concern overwhelming him.
Trying to sound convincing enough, you said in a hushed voice, “I just woke up. Couldn’t sleep properly.”
“You're going to work tomorrow, aren't you?” Dean inquired as if attempting to strike up a conversation after such a lengthy period. You haven't been speaking properly recently for the obvious reason. 
You answered, “Um, yeah,” and lightly stroked your hand to see whether it hurt. It no longer did. Thank goodness you weren't seriously injured. You've also taken plenty of time off from work. It would be best if you started working right away to take your mind off of Dean and all that was going on. There was a lot to take in. 
“But can you work though? Is your hand okay, by the way?”
“Yes, I suppose there's nothing to worry about. It's stopped hurting. Actually, I missed my job. It's been too long since I took a break.”
You took a deep breath and went to head back to your room, saying a quiet, "Good night," but Dean stopped you by grasping your arm after he finished his drink. “Wait,” he quietly whispered. 
He released his hold on you and gently caressed your skin in an attempt to apologize for being a little too harsh on you. You turned to face him, perplexed. “Yes?” you said as you awaited his next words. 
He seemed unable to find the right words to say, so he said, “Whatever happened during the hunting... It wasn't just your fault.” The moment he brought that case back, your heart pounded. 
You took a deep breath to keep yourself from being upset as you thought back to what he had said to you, his hurtful remarks, and how annoyed Dean was as a result of your distraction. 
You managed to stutter, “It's okay,” and try to smile sympathetically at him. “You are right in every way. I should have exercised more caution. After all, he's your brother.”
“No, I'm not right about everything.” Dean took a deep breath and held your still-healing hand. “I was responsible as much as you were. After all, I am the team's oldest member.” He attempted to lighten the situation with a smile, but for some reason neither of you felt like it. 
Dead had told you, just to your face, that Sam was extremely important to him, as if you had someone in your life to worry about. He hated himself for not being more compassionate after realizing he was simply being harsh.
“It was just... in the heat of the moment,” Dean made an effort to explain his behavior. But the way your eyes met, it seemed like he meant something very different.
“I know."
“I only wanted you to be more cautious; I didn't want to hurt you.” He looked into your reddened eyes and added, “Not just for me or Sam, but especially for your own good,” with such genuineness that it seemed he could see what a wreck you were on the inside. How messy you were.
“You did not hurt me at all. I will proceed with greater caution, as I had said previously.” You let his hands lightly brush across yours. Your heart had melted at such a simple, one-time gesture. Though you knew you couldn't, your body was aching to get closer to him. 
He finally released your hand after a little while. However, if he hadn't taken it in the first place, it would have hurt less. 
You hoped with all of your heart that this moment in the kitchen with Dean had gone differently. You wanted to be closer, cuddling, laughing, or doing anything else that would be tender and intimate. But you two were farther apart than before. Your eyes would have said everything about how much you wanted him if they could communicate.
“I honestly didn't intend any of the things I said to you before or later. I want you to understand this.”
“I do, Dean.”
Dean said, “I know things are a little awkward between us, but I don't want it to be like this,” before you could say anything more. “I hope that you continue to feel at ease with me. I suppose we haven't discussed it appropriately so far about this.”
Your cheeks suddenly flushed scarlet at the mention of your circumstance, and fear shot through your veins “It's really okay,” you nodded to him and replied in a hurry. “Everything's alright.” 
You felt burdened with the thought that he could be concerned that you might tell Jo. Should that be his worry, you might reassure and soothe him. In a whisper, you said, “I wouldn't...tell Jo.” 
Dean opened his mouth to say something, then scowled instead. His expression showed signs of uncertainty. Given how often they had been hooking up only, he wasn't really sure if he and Jo were a thing at all. 
He felt a little guilty as well as responsible for initiating the kiss that night since he was aware it was him. 
“You know, I don't want you to feel awkward. Don't let anything go to waste or let this ruin what we have.”
Your heart raced with hopelessness again as Dean blatantly said that he wanted nothing to change and that you should move on from the past. At this point, you couldn't tell if he was genuinely unaware of your emotions. It was better if he hadn't even opened his mouth in the first place and stayed silent. 
Since you believed you were trying your best to keep things calm between you and him and maintain whatever relationship you had with him, you wanted to ask him if there was anything you could have done to make him feel that way about you or did you make him feel uncomfortable around you. It wasn't like you were still holding out hope. You were not anticipating this any longer.
Despite his repeated promises not to hurt you, he continued to do so without even realizing it.
You nodded to him quickly and answered, “Of course, I don't want this either,” with a heavy heart. “I would not want to ruin.”
You gave him a little smile and a mumble of "good night," then turned back toward your room. You would have found the strength to cry a little bit more if your eyes weren't sore from crying so much hours before. But at that moment, all you wanted to do was sleep, without really considering anything.
⋆⋅☆⋆☆⋅⋆───⛥───⋆⋅☆⋅⋆───⛥───⋆⋅☆⋅⋆───⛥───⋆
A/N: Please, let me know what you think about this one. Comments and reblogs are very appreciated! ^^
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@midnightpearlaurora @mango-munchies @zaratahir @sammyxorae @opheliadynah @spxideyver
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Can i ask one for Kate Bishop. One where kate and reader's are best friends .they sleep together after being drunk. R is hopelessly in love with her. Everybody including kate knows this but it's like an un spoken thing.katie says doesn't see r like that because obviously she's afraid of losing the friendship if the relationship fails. Tells r that night was a one tym thing . After sometimes start seeing somebody so r will get the idea. So much angst ,heart breaks ,Kate being an idiot ,r being lovesick puppy .and a Happy ending .☺️ Its okay if you can't .Thank you ♥
an inch away from more than just friends [K.Bishop]
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pairing: kate bishop x reader
summary: falling in love with your best friend is supposed to be easy. unfortunately, neither you nor kate are particularly good at talking about your feelings.
warnings: a complete mess of fluff, smut, angst, and idiots in love; kate is HORRIBLE at acknowledging her feelings; drunken hookup in a storage closet {lots of grinding + teasing; r is a brat and kate is annoyed but turned on; small bits of dirty talk}
wordcount: 4k
a/n: I'M ALIVE! sorry for not posting much on here, i've been spending a lot of this past month working on my vampire!kate story so inspiration has been quite limited. i'm thinking about posting more short drabbles but idk how to format them 😅 anyway, i hope you're all doing well and i hope you enjoy <3
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You weren't sure how you had ended up here. You hated parties. Especially ones thrown by rich people who had nothing better to do than spend a ridiculous amount of money on expensive booze and shitty food.
Not to mention, this particular party was being hosted in some skyscraper in downtown New York, which meant no matter how badly you wanted to escape the bustling atmosphere, there was nowhere else to go. Even the balconies that littered the outside were subject to the nonstop sounds of traffic.
At least it was better than being inside and having to sit through endless small talk about things you didn't understand.
A familiar voice pulls you out of your thoughts as you lean against the railing, silently watching the cars drive by on the street below you. "There you are."
You turn your head and give Kate a small smile. "Hey."
The archer approaches you, a certain bounce in her step that isn't coming from her normal bubbly personality. 
While you weren't the biggest fan of these types of parties, Kate somehow thrived in them. Sure, she could be awkward most times, and she had a terrible habit of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, but she was charming. And as much as she hated the rich men who she had to rub elbows with all night, she understood them.
She'd grown up in this life while you...well, you were an outsider. Someone who didn't fit in, no matter how many expensive outfits the young CEO bought you or how many people she argued with.
The only thing you two could agree on was that the best part of these events was the free alcohol.
"How long have you been out here?" Kate asks as she joins you, her side pressing against yours and giving away how tipsy she already is.
"Like twenty minutes," you reply. "It was getting too stuffy in there."
She laughs and you allow yourself to admire her jawline and the way the city lights bounce across her skin. "Tell me about it. I swear I've had the same conversation with everyone."
"I don't know why you still bother coming to these things."
"It's good for the company, I guess," she says with a shrug. "And it gives me an excuse to get dressed up with you."
You roll your eyes at her, hating the way your heart instantly skips a beat at her words. She always gets extra flirty when she drinks. If you were more of an optimist, you might even believe her words had some sort of truth to them. 
"You're an idiot."
She makes a face at you, her features a mixture of annoyance and amusement. "You always say that."
"Because it's true," you say.
"Whatever," she huffs.
The two of you stand there for a few minutes, basking in the closeness of your bodies. It's a small thing, but it's moments like these that remind you just how deep your feelings for the archer run.
The buzz from the alcohol in your system leads you to rest your head on her shoulder without a second thought. Her arm wraps around you in an instant and it's not until that moment that you realize how cold you are.
"Can we leave yet?" You ask in a soft voice. It's a little embarrassing how desperate you are to be away from the bustling party.
"Almost," she replies. "I think you owe me a dance."
You groan, already dreading the looks you'll definitely get. "Do we have to?"
"Yes, we do." She gives your side an affectionate squeeze before pulling away from you. "Just one dance, and then we can leave."
You know better than to trust her words, but you can't pretend dancing with her doesn't sound nice. Clearly, Kate isn't the only one with lowered inhibitions right now.
"Fine," you roll your eyes but reach out for her hand.
Her fingers interlock with yours, and she leads the way to the makeshift dance floor. Thankfully, most people seem too busy in their own conversations to pay attention to the dancing couples...and you and Kate.
It fills you with more bitterness than you'd like, but you try not to dwell on it. It's easier said than done...until her hands land on your waist and pull you close to her. 
"You can come closer, sweetheart, I don't bite."
A nervous laugh escapes you. Mainly because you've listened to enough of her superhero stories to know for a fact she does bite, but also because getting closer to her is the last thing you should do right now.
She makes it far too easy to do, though, so you give in and wrap your arms around her neck.
The two of you start swaying to the soft music being played by the small group of musicians at the front of the room. It's hard not to spend the entire time admiring her features from this distance and as much as you try to ignore it, it's impossible to deny the way your heart flutters in your chest every time you make eye contact with her.
Your silence seems to surprise her, considering the way her eyebrows furrow together. "You okay?"
You nod and try to ignore how close your faces are. "Yeah, just...thinking."
That seems to get her attention and her concerned look turns into a slightly mischievous smile. "Oh yeah? About what?"
"Wouldn't you love to know?" You reply, hoping your attempt at teasing her will help distract her.
It doesn't work and instead of moving on, she wordlessly pulls you closer, her smile turning into a smirk when your eyes widen from the sudden proximity. "Come on, sweetheart, don't get shy on me now."
"You're annoying."
"Is that why you've been staring at my lips this whole time?"
Her words catch you off-guard, but they're not exactly far-fetched. The alcohol in your system mixed with having her so close only equals a long list of bad ideas. You can't deny how enticing those ideas sound, though.
You somehow manage to find your voice long enough to throw her observation back at her. "I think you're projecting, Katie."
"So you don't want to kiss me?"
She's toying with you, you know she is because you've seen her do it countless times, but you can't find it in yourself to really care. You know you shouldn't do it. You try to remind yourself that you're both drunk and simply trying to rile each other up for fun.
That no matter what happens, it won't mean anything. At least, not to her.
The longer you think about it, though, the less the potential consequences matter to you.
"I do," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper. "But only because it's the only way to shut you up."
You expect her to laugh at you and change the topic, but, of course, she doesn't. Because the only thing Kate loves more than annoying you is taking you by surprise.
In an instant, she closes the distance between your faces, her lips meeting yours in a borderline hesitant kiss. You're certain you've never seen her so nervous before. It's strange but endearing.
More than that, it helps distract you from how nervous you are.
She pulls away from you with a smile so bright that it makes your mind swim. "I guess you were right, kissing me does shut me up."
"Is that your way of trying to convince me to kiss you again?" You ask, doing your best to act nonchalant.
You're not sure that it works very well, but thankfully, she makes no teasing comments about it. She simply steals all your thoughts away by kissing you again.
The fact that you're one step away from fully making out in the middle of the dance floor isn't lost on you. Kate seems to come to the same realization as you at that moment and she reluctantly pulls away from you just to grab your hand and lead you away from everyone's gaze.
You don't know where exactly she's taking you, you just know it's definitely not toward the exit. You'd love to call her out on it and act upset and yet...you don't. How can you when your curiosity is practically eating you alive?
She drags you into the first storage closet she finds, closing the door behind you and pushing you against it. The action steals your breath away, along with the rest of your coherent thoughts.
You weren't going to act like you'd never fantasized about doing this with Kate but you'd always imagined it would happen under different circumstances. Although, if you're completely honest, you can't say you're actually mad about it.
"Hi," you whisper, your eyes drifting down to her lips once more.
"Hey." Her hands find their way back to your waist as she steps forward, effectively trapping you against the door. "Are you...still okay with this? 'Cause we can just leave and act like nothing happened."
You appreciate her thoughtful words even though the fire she started within you is burning far too bright to be put out now. 
"Yeah, I'm okay," you assure her. "I don't think stopping is an option now."
Your words seem to make her hesitation disappear and her smirk instantly makes a comeback. "And why is that, darling?"
"You know why."
Kate leans in closer, one of her hands drifting down to grip your leg and lift it up until it's wrapped around her waist. "Maybe...but I want to hear you say it."
"In your dreams, sweetheart."
You feel incredibly proud of yourself until the archer pushes herself against you, creating the most wonderful friction against your center. The movement catches you off-guard and you let out an embarrassingly desperate moan at the feeling.
The brunette takes advantage of the moment and ducks down to attach her lips to your neck. "I would love to put you in your place but you are far too adorable like this."
Your head tilts back to give her more access to your skin as you struggle to put yourself together long enough to reply to her words. "I wouldn't describe this as adorable."
She chuckles against your skin, the feeling of her warm breath sending ripples of pleasure down your spine. You almost can't believe this is actually happening. For a second, you briefly wonder if you're simply dreaming.
There's no way the pressure of her body against yours isn't real, though. No way for the pleasure you're experiencing to be completely made up by you.
The hand still on your waist gives you a soft squeeze before she guides you against her. There's something slightly humiliating about grinding against her in some random, badly lit, storage closet that only adds to the intensity of the moment.
Kate seems to read your mind considering the way she moves against you, drawing out another barely supressed moan. "You're holding back, y/n/n."
Her teasing words only make you want to tease her right back. Just because you've wanted her like this for a long time doesn't mean you want to make things easy for her. Riling her up is always more fun anyway.
"Maybe you're just not as good as you think you are," you reply, hoping she won't call you out for grinding against her so desperately. 
She has no plan to make things easy on you, though, and as annoying as it is, it's also incredibly attractive. "That's not what your body is saying." 
"How can you be such a dork at a time like this?" 
"It's my talent." 
"Keep telling yourself that." 
She groans, out of annoyance rather than pleasure, but you know your slight defiance is a turn on for her. It's almost funny how someone so bratty gets such a rush out of putting other brats in their place. "I hope you know your attitude is going to cost you later." 
"Don't threaten me with a good time, Katie." 
Her hand finally makes its way up your thigh, and she cups your heated core in one quick move. "How am I the annoying one?" 
You let out a sharp gasp, your hips rocking against her hand with zero shame or hesitation. You're already so close to falling apart, the coil in your stomach embarrassingly close to snapping already. In your defense, it's been a long time since your last hookup. 
"Not so mouthy now, are you, sweetheart?" Her amusement is more than clear and, even though you'd love nothing more than to wipe the smirk off her face, you're a little preoccupied with the mounting pleasure. 
"Kate..." You whimper, attempting to pull her impossibly closer to you. "Fuck."
Her teasing energy is quickly replaced by satisfaction. Satisfaction that motivates her to speed up her movements, effectively replacing all your thoughts with the feeling of her hands on you.
"You gonna cum for me, baby?" She asks, her lips trailing a path from your neck to your jaw.
"Yeah," you reply, your voice a breathless, needy, whisper. "...please."
"Such a good girl. Go on, let me hear you fall apart for me."
Her words are exactly what you need to let go. It's a little embarrassing, and the lack of full contact makes it a little less satisfying than you'd like, but your orgasm crashes into you almost instantly. Your hands grip onto her shoulders as you ride out the waves, her soft whispers guiding you through the overwhelming sensations.
You're shaking and panting and absolutely spent after such a rush of emotions and Kate is right there, holding you close through it all. Somehow, the affection and care she's showing you feels even better than the orgasm you just had.
"You okay, baby?" She asks as she leans back just enough so your eyes can meet again.
You nod, still too shaken to find your voice. 
"You're too cute." 
Despite your breathlessness, she gives you a quick kiss, pouring far too many feelings neither of you want to think about right now into it. The alcohol must be draining from your system because you're already starting to freak out about this.
About how difficult it'll be to act like nothing happened. Like you're not completely in love with your best friend.
There's no way for you to deny it now. Hell, Kate herself can't deny it anymore either.
And yet you both try.
"Do you want to go back to my apartment?" She asks once you're able to pull away from each other.
The intention is behind her words is more than clear and it somehow manages to bring your confidence back. "Only if you let me repay the favor."
"I think we can definitely work something out," she replies with a genuine smile.
That's all you need to take her hand and drag her out of the storage closet. Her laugh rings out in your ears as you make your way to the exit.
True to your word, you spend the rest of the night returning the favor and drawing orgasm after orgasm out of Kate. It's not enough to make you believe you'll be together the way you want to and yet it's more than enough for ythe moment. 
It's more than you ever thought you'd get from her.
Unfortunately, morning comes too quickly and it brings the realization that you severely underestimated how much things would change. How quick Kate would be to sweep everything under the rug and deny it even happened.
It hurts but it's not a complete surprise considering the way the archer reacts to most things.
You manage to work through it, silencing your desires in favor of making her comfortable and keeping her in your life. It's not the healthiest thing in the world but you manage.
Your friendship only suffers for a few days before you're back to normal. No one would even notice anything if it weren't for the major heart eyes you throw her way all the time.
Everyone knows, though. Everyone cares except Kate.
Instead of talking about it like a normal person, she decides to make things worse by getting a girlfriend. You don't even know who she is and the archer doesn't give you any real details, she just mumbles something about a coffee shop and a cute dog.
You've never known Kate to be particularly reserved but she is this time. Not just that, she actively ignores you. Dodging your questions expertly and pretending there's nothing weird about how little time she spends with you.
You had always assumed it would be your feelings that ruined your friendship but Kate managed to ruin everything on her own. It's almost a skill.
Somehow, even as your heart breaks and endless questions swim around your mind, you manage to keep going. More than that, you match Kate's energy and pretend you don't even notice the change in her attitude. You're not sure who's more hurt by that but you don't even care.
You treasure the brief moments you get with her and mentally shout at her every time she cancels another movie night. Her excuses are endless. One day, she tells you she's too busy with Avengers work, the next she's too caught up with Bishop Securities.
The only thing that brings you some sense of comfort is the fact you're not the only one being lied to. Her so-called "girlfriend" gets the same excuses as you, at least that's what Yelena tells you. The Russian has no reason to lie, though, so you believe her and ignore the rising thought of making Kate jealous.
That's the only thing you're able to do: ignore Kate and the feelings you still have for her.
It works for a while...until the archer finds her way back to you.
It's the middle of the night when you hear frantic knocking on your door. You suppress your fear long enough to make it to the door, baseball bat in hand.
You open the door and come face to face with those same blue eyes you've tried not to think about for over a month. "Kate?"
"Hey," she mumbles, nervousness instantly creeping into her voice. "I, um...can I come in?"
You're tempted to say no and slam the door in her face. You're honestly half-way to doing it when you notice the way she's swaying and clutching her side."You're not drunk, are you?" You question.
Your attempt to lighten the mood falls flat but she smiles anyway. "No, I'm unfortunately sober."
You hum in response before stepping aside and letting her come in. There's a voice in the back of your head that warns you not to get caught up in the past. To keep your distance until she, at the very least, apologizes for being such a jerk to you.
Kate manages to make it to your couch without tripping while you lock your door and put the baseball bat back in its usual place. You brace yourself for the uncomfortable conversation that's bound to follow as you follow after her.
"So...what happened to you?"
Her only response for a few moments is a groan and you do your best to stifle your laughter. For someone who's the human embodiment of a golden retriever, she looks a lot like a grumpy cat right now.
"Stupid mission," she grumbles while attempting to stretch her sore muscles. "I don't know where someone can get the money for that many henchmen."
"Says the rich girl," you reply with a smirk.Kate rolls her eyes but some of the tension in her shoulders disappears. 
"Oh, shut up."
Your cross your arms over your chest before raising an eyebrow at her. "I don't think you're in any position to talk to me like that."
A barely noticeable blush spreads across her features. "Sorry," she mumbles. "I just...I've missed talking to you like this."
You wish it didn't but your heart skips a beat at her words. It's stupid considering the fact she's the one who put you guys in this situation yet there's nothing you can do about it. Your heart still belongs to her.
"Is that why you've been ignoring me lately?" You ask, unable to keep the bitterness out of your tone. "Why are you even here, anyway? I'm sure your girlfriend's worried about you."
Your words cause the smallest of changes in Kate's body language. She hunches down almost as if she's trying to sink into herself and disappear. You've seen her like this far too many times to not know how she's feeling.
"She would be if she didn't hate my guts right about now," she replies with a sigh. "Can't say I blame her, breaking up with her and leaving on a mission isn't the most mature thing to do."
"Wow, you're finally self-aware," you tease her, more out of habit that anything else. "A lot can change in a month, huh?"
The lack of annoyance in your tone allows her to relax again. As much as you might like to be petty, she seems genuinely sorry and upset. "Okay, I deserve that. I've been an asshole to you."
"Yes, you have, but it looks like karma finally caught up with you."
There's an edge of concern to your words that you can't quite hide. She doesn't seem to be in excruciating pain which hopefully means she's not badly hurt but with how stubborn she is, you wouldn't be surprised if she was blatantly hiding a gunshot wound.
Kate chuckles as she leans back against your couch, the movement allows you to search her suit for bloodstains and, thankfully, you find nothing except a couple of tears in the fabric. "Karma's a bitch..but I probably deserved it."
"Probably?" You ask.
"Okay, fine," she grumbles. "I definitely deserved it. It just...seemed like the right thing to do."
You can't hold back the scoff that leaves your lips. "On what Earth was ignoring me after hooking up with me "the right thing to do"?"
She grimaces, the words hitting her a little too hard. You feel a little bad for her even though these are simply the consequences of her own actions. "I was afraid of ruining our friendship. I didn't...I don't want to lose you, y/n. You mean too much to me."
A part of you wants to keep being petty about the whole thing but you've missed her far too much to push her away now. Even though she probably deserves it for being such an idiot.
"You have a very weird way of showing it." You finally allow yourself to close the distance between you two, walking over and taking a seat next to her.
Kate's hand instantly finds its way into yours, her head turning to look at you. There's a thin layer of tears in her eyes that tugs at your heartstrings. "I know...and I really am sorry."
"I know," you reply, giving her hand a soft squeeze. "You're my best friend, Kate, I've always known you're an idiot."
She rolls her eyes but doesn't say anything more, allowing a comfortable silence to fill the room.
There's a lot more you both still want to say and yet neither of you makes any attempt at breaking the moment. It's almost comforting how quickly you fall back together like two slightly damaged magnets.
Finally, after minutes go by, Kate allows herself to tell you the truth.
"It's you," she says, her voice barely above a whisper. "It's always been you and I'm so sorry I tried to pretend it wasn't true."
Her words bring a wave of relief, and a slight bit of annoyance that you do your best to supress. "Can you just shut up and kiss me before I kick you out?"
She laughs, a real one this time, before leaning forward and stealing your breath with a kiss.
It's not enough to fix all the damage but it's a start. And you're more than happy to flip the page with her.
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thepixelelf · 2 days
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superhero cheol x tech whiz reader warnings: coarse language. food. wc: 1.0k
[anonymous nights] As Seungcheol ducked behind the world’s most disgusting, foul-smelling, gag-inducing dumpster, he thought this was perhaps — no, definitely — the worst idea you’d ever had. His full-head mask was starting to itch, and he felt stupid in his suit sneaking through alleys and hiding behind trash cans.
“Remind me again why I’m following this random ass dude instead of Seo Jewon? What happened to catching the city’s ‘fourth most dangerous villain’?”
A bit of static tickled Seungcheol’s ear through the communication device implanted in his suit, which he knew meant you were getting further and further away the more he pursued the target. He had no idea where you parked your small van, aside from knowing it was somewhere in the city — a precaution put in place so Seungcheol would never be able to give away your location. Or, more accurately, so he wouldn’t risk losing the petabytes of information you’d collected over the years.
“Seo Jewon was a total red herring, this is our real guy,” you said through his earpiece.
The man he was following kept walking, and Seungcheol almost thanked him because he had to get away from whatever was polluting that dumpster. “And you know that because…?”
“Hey, who’s the brains of this operation?” You sounded slightly garbled, but Seungcheol could hear your mouse clicking in the background. “That’s right, me.”
Seungcheol rolled his eyes even though he knew you couldn’t see it.
“I can feel you rolling your eyes, Solar Flare.”
Okay, maybe not.
“How do you always do that?”
He could hear your smile through the device. Maybe it wasn’t so hard. “I told you. Brains.” You tapped your mic twice, and Seungcheol winced at the plosive sound. He was about to complain when you spoke again. “Eyes up, Solar, you’re losing him.”
Glancing around, Seungcheol realized he did, in fact, lose track of the target, and he cursed under his breath. He heard you holding back laughter before you muted yourself. Picking up the pace and getting heavier on his feet, Seungcheol searched for your supposed ‘true villain’. Your silence only spurred him on; he knew you were making fun of him in your head.
You’d been assigned to him about a year ago, a decision made by the higher-ups because Seungcheol was apparently “too much of a handful” with his fiery powers (plus an equally fiery attitude), and you were the prodigious tech newbie they could force into working with him. Little did they know, spending too much time with him made you just as annoying. Hence why you and him were out tonight, chasing a completely new suspect instead of the one the bosses sent you after.
“Check your two o’clock.”
Seungcheol slipped into another alleyway, sticking close to the walls, though a load of good that did. “You know,” he said, a little breathless from his efforts to catch up to the target, “it might be a bit easier for me to tail this guy if I wasn’t dressed like Guy Fieri.”
“Hey, I didn’t design the suit, I just built it.” Your words sounded weird again. “Blame the fashion department, not me.”
“Okay, one, we don’t have a fashion department, and two, are eating cup fucking ramen right now?”
He could hear you slurping noodles up. “What? I can’t have dinner and save the city at the same time?”
“Dinner?! It’s like one in the morning!”
“I'm a busy sidekick.”
“You are not my sidekick.”
You snorted into the mic, an undignified sound you never held back from making when it was just you and Seungcheol. “Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.”
“Whatever. Tell me you at least had breakfast.” The line went silent, and Seungcheol cursed again. “You’re a hazard.”
Seungcheol could feel your greasy smile through the comm as you cooed. “I’m your hazard, Solar Flare.”
After working together for almost a year, you still hadn’t called Seungcheol by his name. You said it was “keeping things professional”, but Seungcheol was pretty sure you just liked to tease him. Before you, no one had ever made jokes about his destructive superpowers. In fact, most people stayed away from him as much as possible. Then you came along and started saying he was your personal barbecue grill or space heater, never once afraid of his tendency to catch things on fire.
Seungcheol never told you how much he appreciated that.
“Shut up,” he mumbled.
“You lost him again.”
“God damn it.”
Seungcheol spent the next twenty minutes tailing your suspect through the city with you piping in every few turns, letting him know what he couldn’t see. He was beginning to think this was stupid. Of course this guy wasn’t the culprit, you must have been wrong — it wasn’t like you’d never been wrong before.
But then the guy turned a corner where almost no one ever went. He walked through another totally gross alley and went down some rusted outdoor basement stairs, glancing around. Almost like he didn’t want to be followed. Seungcheol silently pleaded it wasn’t what it looked like. (Though he probably shouldn’t have, considering this meant he was about to catch the bad guy.)
After the man entered the door, Seungcheol walked up to it, peering through the tiny barred window. He couldn’t see anything, so he opened the door just a crack and stepped through as quietly as he could. A dark hallway was all that greeted him, but down it, he could hear angry voices going at each other over something he couldn’t quite make out. Peeking out of the hallway, Seungcheol immediately retracted when he saw everything. A bunch of men and piles and piles of… well he didn’t know exactly what, but it didn’t look good.
“I fucking knew it!” you cheered through his earpiece. You must’ve already taken a picture during the millisecond Seungcheol had poked his head out and scanned it. “Alright, I’m calling backup.”
“What’s our cover story tonight? That I just so happened to stumble across the city’s fourth most dangerous secret lair?”
You clacked away at your keyboard. “No cover story this time. I found this guy fair and square.”
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part 2 | part 3
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ladykailitha · 1 day
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The Hellfire Exotic Club Part 5
Hello! I'm really love the response to this story. Thank you everyone who commented or tagged.
In this part we get to meet Ellie their costume designer, and Steve proves why he's there.
Pt 1 Pt 2 Pt 3 Pt 4
~
Steve was doing his warm ups when Chrissy came up to him.
“Hey,” she said. “We finally got our costume designer in at the same time as you. So you need to go to the dressing room and get measured.”
He nodded and went back to the dressing room. It was a long room packed with vanities, costumes, and props. It was where everyone got dressed. Man and woman alike. Eddie’s club was making good money, but it was just easier to just have everyone in the same room. Plus, it wasn’t like everyone hadn’t seen everyone else’s bits. After all, nakedness was part of the job.
The only one who had his own dressing room was Eddie. And that was because it doubled as his office. It had all his costumes, his guitars, but also his desk and filing cabinets. It had a long green, leather sofa two big fluffy armchairs across from his desk chair.
Standing at the end of the of the room in front of the rows and rows of clothing racks where all the costumes were kept was a woman in her early twenties with curly, brown hair and slim figure. Her back was to him so he couldn’t see her face. But he liked her style. It was funky and eclectic and Steve instantly loved it.
“Hey,” he called out gently. “I’m here to measured and hopefully not be found wanting.”
She turned around with a giggle. “And would you be William or Count Adhemar in this situation?”
Steve laughed. “My hope is to always be the hero, especially in my own story. And do I call you Kate or something else?”
“Ellie will do just fine,” she said with a smile. “So you’re the new Envy. You aren’t what I was expecting, if I’m honest.”
“No?” he said as he finished walking the rest of the way to her. “I’m not sure what you were told about me, so...”
Again Ellie giggled. “Well judging from the way Eddie and Chrissy talk about you I was expecting someone taller at the very least. You are conventionally attractive, but I guess I was thinking more Chris Hemsworth then Chris Pine, if I’m honest.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment then,” he said. “Personally I prefer Pine over all the other Chrises. He’s got a ‘fuck you I do what I want’ style I like.”
“Me too,” she said with a soft knowing smile. “So let’s get those measurements and then afterwards we can talk about what you want out of your costumes. I understand you and Chrissy are going to be Hansel and Gretel for the Fairy Tale Night, is that right?”
Steve nodded. “I think that Eddie just wants to see me in lederhosen.” He paused for a second. “My best friend, Robin, too, now that I think about it.”
She laughed out loud for the first time and Steve decided she should laugh more. It was cute. “Well, aren’t they going to be disappointed. It’s meant to be sexy, not ridiculous.”
He smiled back at her. Yeah, they were going to along just fine. Ellie went through measuring him, quickly and efficiently. Steve was impressed by her professionalism and she was impressed by his ability to take direction and to hold still when told.
Once they were done Ellie sat him down and she pulled out a sketch book. She showed him the designs for the Hansel outfit. It had a lot of layers so that as they went through the forest more clothes would come off. Lamia would be the witch and Eddie’s Lucifer would rescue them. It was all very hot and Steve couldn’t wait to preform it.
“I love it,” he told Ellie. “Can we make the costumes brown on the outside and get lighter and lighter until the bottom layer is white?”
Ellie tapped her pencil to her lips. “What if we started off with black and worked our way through grey to white?”
Steve resisted the urge to sigh. It was Eddie wish to be everything black or red for their costumes and it looked the costume designer felt the same. “How about red?”
Ellie’s eyes lit up. “That could work!” And she pulled out her colored pencils and got to work coloring the different layers. Once she was done, she looked up at him and he grinned back.
“Perfect,” he said. “Now let me tell you what I’m going to need from my costume and you can help me figure out what it should look like.”
She nodded and listened to his wants and needs, jotting down notes and sketching out ideas as he talked.
“I might not take it all off every time,” Steve admitted, scratching his cheek nervously. “But I want the option there if at all possible.”
Ellie did a couple more sketches and showed them to him. He took the sketch book from her as he examined the different designs. He pointed to the one on the left. “Add some of the flare from the second one and I think you’ve got it.”
She added the flourishes from the one costume to the other and then showed Steve. He nodded.
“All right,” she said standing up, “I’ll be by in a couple of weeks with your costume for a fitting and see if there’s any tweaks to finalize. I’ve also taken your current costume and will have it sent over on Sunday so that you are able to dance easier.”
He let out a sigh of relief. “That would be fantastic. I’ll be glad to be able to do my job without sacrificing a gallon of blood every night.”
Steve walked her out and said goodbye. Then he got back to warm ups and practice. He was about done with his first solo routine when one of the dancers came up to him.
“Why are you so special that Ellie came to you?” the young man bit out. “Everyone else had to go to her shop to get measured.”
Steve looked up at him with a frown. “You’re Leviathan, right?” The guy nodded. “I’m busy during the day and on my nights off. And when I was free, she was busy. She offered to come to me during practice, man, I don’t know what you want me to tell you.”
“Why you’re getting such preferential treatment?” Levi huffed. “Boss wouldn’t let us backup dancers even try out for Envy even though we should have been given the chance first. We’ve been here longer and deserve a crack at making real money. But no... you come in here with your stupid little heaven song and your stupid little angel dances and now you’re getting Ellie to come to you? It’s bullshit!”
Steve just put his hands up in the air. “You’re acting like I’m some evil mastermind designed to fuck up your life, but the truth is it sounds life your beef is with Eddie not me. I’m not the one who set up tryouts. I’m not the one that called Ellie to come get my measurements. I’m not the one that suggested the angel theme, all I did was pick a song that would get me noticed. Eddie is the one who did all those things. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to warm up.”
Levi snarled and turned on his heel, stomping away. Or as much stomping as one could when you’d spent your life learning to land as softly as possible.
Steve rolled his shoulders. He was used to people blaming him because he was rich and popular and good looking and could fucking dance. They couldn’t get over the fact that he had these natural talents; things he was born with that he didn’t chose. But it was always his fault anyway.
Chrissy came back from wherever she had gone during his session with Ellie, with a big smile. “You ready to back into this?” she asked cheerfully.
“Ready when you are!”
~
To say Eddie was pissed would be an understatement. He had just gotten off the phone with some Bible thumping street preacher demanding that they shutter their doors and repent to come to God.
When Eddie told him that he didn’t believe in God and even if he had, he’d rather go to Hell, the preacher started screaming obscenities about how he was going to expose the club for what it was, a den of iniquity and was going to get it closed down.
Then Stella came in and was up his ass about the angel dances again. He told her that when she brought in as much money as Steve and Chrissy did during those dances then he would listen to her.
“Mark my words, Eddie,” Stella hissed. “He’s going to be the ruin of the club and when it all comes crashing down, I’m going to still be here so I can tell you to your face, ‘I told you so’.”
Then she stormed out. Eddie followed her because he honestly thought she would start going on a rampage in the dressing room, tearing shit up.
Which meant he got a front row seat to Levi trying bully Steve. Not that it worked, Steve returned better than he got, but it was the fact that one of his people had tried. It wasn’t the first time Eddie heard the rumblings from the backup dancers about not getting a chance to audition for Envy and it probably wouldn’t the last. But he wasn’t going to let someone bully someone he had handpicked.
He walked up to the stage whistled long and loud. Steve was the last to stop and look at him, finishing the turn he was doing. He blushed when he realized everyone was waiting for him.
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
“Don’t worry about it,” Eddie said. “I get wanting to complete a spin instead of abruptly stopping and risking a fall.”
Steve nodded, still feeling the heat of embarrassment on the back of his neck after the sting of Levi’s words still rang in his head.
“I’ve been getting and hearing a lot of complaints about how I run things lately,” Eddie began.
The assembled dancers began to shift uncomfortably. “Especially from the backup dancers about the auditions to replace Envy. You all think you’re better than Stevie here,” he continued. “So put your money where your mouth is. All eight of you will dance Billy’s version of the tease. And you don’t want to, you know where the fucking door is. Don’t let it hit you on the way out.”
There was a gasp and then deadly silence. “If any of you are as good as he is, I’ll concede the point and we’ll discuss the details after. But here’s the thing, my little demons. You aren’t as good as he is. He learned his dance in three days.”
There were some sharp grumbling at that but a single glare from Eddie silenced them again.
“Jeff, Brian, and Gareth will be the judges because clearly you don’t trust me and Chrissy’s judgment. They will score you on hitting all the moves. On style. And finally on how sexy it was. Then after you’ve all danced and I’m proven right, you’ll have two options,” he bit out, holding up two fingers. “Shut up and dance. Or get the fuck out of my club. Because I think you assholes forgot who’s name is on the deed. Not you. Not Wayne. Not anyone but me.”
The rest of the demons glared at the two main culprits: Levi and Danny. Levi sneered and Danny was nonplussed.
“Come on, Leviathan,” Eddie snarled back. “You think you’re such a big shot. Go on, prove it.”
Levi got into position to dance.
Chrissy hurried over to the music and turned on “Devil Inside”. Steve didn’t want to toot his own horn, but he could see why Billy was only as good as the pole he was dancing on. It was loud and outrageous but no technique or style. It was all sex and no substance.
When he was done Eddie called out all the other dancers. Choronzon, Belial, Beelzebub, Astraroth, Stolas, Mephistopheles, and then finally Dagon. Danny was a good dancer, particularly on the pole. But again, there was no style or substance to the tease.
When her dance ended, Steve raised his hand. “Can I try?”
All heads snapped his direction.
“What now?” Cheryl asked. “You dance it every Sunday.”
Steve shook his head. “What you guys just danced is not what I do on Sundays. Chrissy modified it on the fly because I’m not built the way Billy was.”
There was some murmuring but Chrissy confirmed he doesn’t do Billy’s dance. Parts of it, yes. But there was no way Steve could dance it well enough in time.
“But you just watched it,” Stella said. “There is no way you can do replicate that!”
Steve shrugged. “I watched it eight times. It has a lot of beats of what I do, but in a slightly different order. I should get a chance to do it. It’s my reputation on the line, isn’t it?”
No one could refute that so Steve got into position and everyone’s jaw dropped. Including Eddie and Chrissy. Steve started his dance on stool but Billy started front and center. And that’s where he stood.
Scott smirked as the music started. It was Chrissy and him who helped Steve nail it down in three days.
The difference was staggering. Eddie’s jaw remained on the floor for the duration of of the tease. As did almost everyone else’s. Only Stella and Scott were unmoved. Scott because he knew how good Steve was and Stella because she was being forced to eat crow.
The song ended and the room erupted in cheers and whistles. Steve lifted his head and winked.
Jeff threw his notes in the air behind him. “I don’t fucking need these. Steve’s was sexier, smoother, and nearly technically perfect.”
Gareth crossed his arms over his chest. “I agree. All of the backup dancers did the routine. But none of them were Envy.”
“I’m asexual and even I could tell Steve’s was sexier,” Brian said. “And it’s because he connected to his audience. Me, Gare, and Jeff. He played to us not at us.”
Eddie raised his arm to the stage. “Satan everyone!” He jutted his thumb behind him. “Take it or leave it!”
No one moved an inch. “Then shut up and dance!” He turned on his heel and stormed back to his office.
Chrissy clapped her hands. “All righty! Everyone back on the starting line!”
Everyone scrambled to get back into position. Chrissy and Scott shared a smirk as Levi and Danny stood a little straighter.
Point well and truly made.
~
Tag List: ONE SLOT OPEN
1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog
2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
9- @dreamercec @sadisticaltarts @too-much-tma-stuff @dolphincliffs @chameleonhair
10- @themoonagainstmers @gloomysoup @novelnovella @micheledawn1975
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abarbaricyalp · 3 days
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A Precious Few, These Precious Days I'll Spend With You 🍂🍁🍂🍁🍂
"Hey, Uncle Sam? Why are people on the internet mad that you and Bucky broke up?" Cass asked as he sat beside Sam on the front porch and dug out pumpkin seeds from the giant bowl of pumpkin mush.
"'Cause people think they're entitled to an opinion about our lives just because we're in the news a lot," Sam answered and deposited more pumpkin insides directly where Cass had just been almost done with the seeds.
Cass scowled at the bowl but got over it quickly. "Yeah, no, I know that one. You've said that one before," he agreed. "Mostly I meant, why do people on the internet think you and Bucky broke up?"
"What do you mean?" Sam asked in his sneaky-not-sneaky way. The way he always tried to prod for gift ideas while thinking he was being cool about it. He was never cool about it. "You know Bucky is working with a new boss and we decided that was an irreconcilable difference."
Cass rolled his eyes so hard he thought he'd prove his mama right and get them stuck like that. "You're really gonna try'n lie to me, Uncle Sam? He's stealing my Fig Newtons. I saw him the other night. No one else eats those except me and him."
"How is Bucky stealing your cookies from my kitchen?" Sam asked, not cool at all. His not-sneaky side eye had disappeared and now he was staring into the pumpkin like there was anything in it. "He lives in DC now."
"Oh, yeah," Cass added. He wiped his hand on his jeans and ignored Sam's half hollered objection to that. He pulled out his phone and then pulled up a screenshot from a video call. "That's the kitchen you designed, right?" he asked, showing Sam the pretty kitchen Bucky had been walking through on their call.
"Why are you face timing my ex?" Sam asked, reaching to snatch the phone away.
"I'm trying to convince him to cut his hair." Cass kept his phone out of Sam's reach. "And! And-- and that's your head, isn't it?" he added, sliding to another picture and zooming in on a blurry spot over the back of Bucky's couch. He scooted a step away before showing his phone this time.
"Since when do you talk to Bucky on the phone?"
Cass scoffed as he locked his phone back. "I've been talking to Bucky on the phone since the first night he stayed here," he said. "He used to sneak AJ and me snacks after bedtime."
"Of course he did. I don't know what you think you know but you don't know it."
Cass pretended to count out the logic in that sentence and gave up. "What I know is: You and Bucky never broke up. He's still coming down to see you and you see him up in DC. You two made this house together and you made one up there together too. Which is so unfair. That's two of everything! Did you make sure there's a good climbing tree up there? When can I go see it? The house, not the tree. But, yeah, the tree too."
"You can't go see it. It's Bucky's house, not mine. I've never been there." Sam stood, setting aside the pumpkin hastily and retreating inside. "I was stealing your cookies and Bucky obviously just has a type," he said as the screen door shut between them.
Cass scrambled to his feet too, bringing both bowls of pumpkin insides with him before the squirrels could eat all of the seeds like they did last year. He struggled with the door and Sam was no help, but he did get inside. He set the bowls into the sink-- the same kind of farm sink Bucky had in his videos-- with a clatter and followed his uncle into the sun room.
"You're allergic to figs; you're not stealing my cookies. And I think Bucky's type begins and ends with you."
Sam sputtered out an indignation that wasn't actually words. He kept fiddling with his record player and Cass thought about telling him not to turn up the volume to drown out the conversation. He thought about telling him that was the same silly thing AJ did and AJ wasn't even a preteen yet and did he really want to be acting like a kid? Except, yeah, probably. Mama and Sam fought like kids all the time, even though they were always fussing at Cass and AJ to act their ages and behave.
"How come you're pretending to be broken up?" Cass insisted before Sam could get the record set. "It's not like it's gonna fool anyone. Not saying y'all were dating in the first place never fooled anyone."
Sam sighed and set the record down on the cradle but didn't lower the needle. "It's safer this way."
Cass made a face and crossed his arms. He'd turned fifteen two months ago (and there'd been a mysterious package left for him in the kitchen with a note in Bucky's old timey scrawl, imagine that) and everyone kept saying he had become a fine young man. But the old ladies from church still giggled and cooed when he stood like this and tried to tell AJ anything. 'Playing at being grown' they always said. He was really going for more of the fine young man right now.
"Safer like how it was safer for you to move back to DC after you became Captain America?" he asked. "And then you had to come back to save the day anyway?"
Sam shot him a sharp look but he didn't argue. Cass had never met his grandfather and he couldn't remember his daddy much at all, but he was pretty certain that look was down deep in the Wilson Family bones, genetic and otherwise. Still, he prodded closer.
"Do you really think neither of you are gonna go running as soon as the other is in trouble? Or that your bosses and all the other heroes don't know?"
"Cassius Adam," Sam warned.
Cass let out a huff. "I'm not gonna tell anyone. I didn't even tell AJ or mama. AJ would sit up looking for him all night of he thought he might be around."
Sam kind of flinched and Cass wasn't sure why. He hadn't meant it in a mean way. He wasn't even really being mean to AJ. It was just true. AJ was obsessed with Bucky and would search for him in every shadow if he might be there.
"Good, you shouldn't tell anyone," Sam said instead of addressing anything else more important that Cass had been talking about. "Remember how he used to play spies with you? Play spies again. You can't talk to anyone about anything he's doing. Even if it's just hanging out in the kitchen or whatever."
Cass already knew all of that. That's why he hadn't said anything. He'd been living with Captain America and the Winter Soldier for more than three years now. He knew how to handle it. It was kind of insulting that Uncle Sam didn't think he had this down pat.
"I'm not gonna spill," he said. "But you shouldn't lie either. What if something happens and mama doesn't know what to do, huh?"
"Happens with what?" Sam asked. He leaned back against the record stand and crossed his arms, a mirror of Cass, just a little to the left. "With Bucky? That has nothing to do with you, your brother, or your mama, alright?"
"No, but it has to do with you. What if you go running off to save him and something happens and you didn't tell anyone anything 'cause you're pretending like you don't like each other? Then what?"
"And you think that rescuing me is gonna be your responsibility?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.
Cass felt his cheeks heat a little. Yes, yes he did, actually. He was getting old enough for it. Elijah wasn't that much older than him when Sam first met him. "It's gotta be somebody's responsibility," he answered levelly, instead of saying any of that, cause that would just lead to a new lecture and possibly getting grounded for the rest of his life.
"It's not your responsibility," Sam corrected. "I've got grown ups helping me. Your responsibility is geometry." He pushed himself off of the record stand. The record was still on it, which Cass knew would drive Sam nuts once he remembered it in a few hours.
"If you're saving Bucky, who has your back?" Cass countered as Sam tugged on one of his curls and walked by.
"Torres," Sam answered easily.
"Nuh-uh," Cass argued. "Torres isn't an adult. You said he can't even babysit 'cause he'll let us try the wings." Cass followed after Sam back into the house and into his bedroom. He pointedly tossed one of Bucky's hoodies from the floor into the hamper.
Sam ignored him. "Just 'cause I don't trust Torres to keep you two on the ground doesn't mean I don't trust him for other things."
"That doesn't even make sense. Uncle Sam!" he whined and threw himself across the bed dramatically. He clutched the edges of the old Wilson quilt (which Sam had totally stolen from the house when he moved out) and rolled twice to wrap himself in it. "You're supposed to have backup. Bucky is your backup."
Sam pulled down the top edge of the quilt so he could see Cass's face. He sat beside him and rubbed at the approximate location of Cass's shoulder. "You're really worried about me, huh?"
"No," Cass lied. "I just don't like you and Bucky lying to us. I don't like you two being separate either. It's easier knowing you have each other's backs."
"Well, sometimes things happen and we can't have the security blanket we want," Sam started to explain, choosing his words carefully. "Bucky and I are both going to be okay, even if we aren't together. And sometimes a little bit of a lie can help. Superheroes. A little bit of a lie can help superheroes, not fifteen year olds. Bucky is running his own mission and having Captain America on his tail constantly isn't going to help him. And the same thing for me. Captain America needs a little bit of distance from what Bucky's doing."
Cass glowered and flipped the blanket over his face again. "That's lying," he insisted. "Nothing good comes from lying."
"I can't believe your mama is keeping that old phrase going," Sam sighed. "Look, can you be bribed?"
Cass lowered the blanket down again. "With what?"
"I'll let you know when he's around and it's safe, alright? You can come hang out with us if you want. You can see that we're alright."
Cass watched his uncle's face for any sign of a lie and he parsed out the offer for any possible ways out of it. Sure, Sam could say every visit was too dangerous, but Cass was pretty certain he wouldn't.
"Like spies?" he asked cautiously. "Just us?"
"Just us until your brother puts it together too," Sam agreed. "Just like spies."
After a moment of more consideration, Cass nodded. "Fine. I'll stop complaining and I won't tell anyone about it unless something goes wrong."
Sam grimaced a little (Cass knew he wanted to argue with that part about things going wrong) but he nodded too. "It's a deal."
Cass flipped the blanket over his face again and did another half roll so he wasn't facing Sam. "Can we put cinnamon sugar on some of the seeds?" he asked. "I don't like it when they're all hot."
Sam laughed a little and he sounded kind of relieved at the change in conversation. "Sweet pumpkin seeds?" he asked. "I've never tried that before. I bet we can make it work."
Yeah, Cass thought to himself, they could make this work.
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rey-jake-therapist · 2 days
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SPOILERS EPISODE 7
I'm so, so, SO scared of what Sauron will make Celebrimbor endure to make him say where the Nine are. We know he will stop at nothing to get this information. And Celebrimbor will resist because he knows that Sauron is sure he's following the right path (deceiving himself, in his own words), and thus impossible to reason with. So he will resist, but somehow Sauron will realize that he didn't hide the rings somewhere but trusted someone with them. But how much torture will he inflict to Celebrimbor before he comes to this conclusion and chases the person who ran away with the rings? I dread to think of the pain this man will endure before Sauron understands he's beating the wrong bush 🙁
Will he be surprised to see Galadriel's the one who carries the rings? Does he even know she's here? I was surprised that there wasn't any indication about that in episode 7. I didn't expect him to do anything to free her from Adar (I predicted a while ago that she would be a bait for Elrond, not Sauron), but it was a tad disappointing to see no acknowledgement of her presence. Maybe it's meant to surprise him, after all.
And Mirdania.... She was really just a plot device, wasn't she? 😅Their last interaction was interesting, to say the least. Twice, we saw Sauron touch Mirdania; the first time it was pretty obvious that it was because she reminded him of Galadriel, I'm much less sure about the second time.... It was probably just manipulation. But during their last interaction, she touched his arm and he remained frozen, annoyed even by this unsolicited gesture. This shows alone how much in control of everything and everyone Sauron wants to be. He had no affection for this girl, so he didn't want her to touch him. He even pushed the cynism to the point of promising herr she would be "rewarded" for the good job she had done, knowing perfectly that he would soon get rid of her.
The way he sacrificed her really showed how dispensable Mirdania (and everybody else) was, to him. And let's not forget the timing!! Galadriel's nearby and will soon meet him for an epic fight. Does he know she's here, it's unsure but it screams "my ex is back in town, it was fun but girl you have to go" 😅
Charlie Vickers said that to Sauron, people were just little bugs. I guess he holds a few people, such as Celebrimbor and Galadriel, to higher standards, because he can play these will power games he likes so much with them. They make the game interesting because they're strong minded and will fight back (even if it pisses him off when they do!). All the others are just insects he can crush without a second thought.
This dialogue about Morgoth was very enlightening, to understand how Sauron's mind work, and why he's the way he is now. I loved that the show didn't ask us to sympathize for him; as Celebrimbor pointed out, he chose to submit him (and "countless of others") to the same suffering he was himself subjected to. We saw first hand in season 1 how he could have decided to change his ways, the opportunity Galadriel gave him to take another path, but decided repeat the old patterns instead.
For the audience, it will be heartbreaking to see him slowly but surely sinking deeper into the darkness, because despite all his evil deeds, we can't help but liking him (well at least I can't! 😩), and we know the goal he pursues isn't bad in itself.... It's his methods, and his insistance in wanting to control absolutely everything and everyone that ruins any good intention he could have regarding Middle-Earth....
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Shibajuku Girls: The Return?
Soooooooooo I've been debating whether to post about this at all because I doubt anyone will find it very interesting, but doll gossip is thin on the ground these days and I'm not quite ready to go to bed yet, so eff it let's go--
Alright so, those of you who follow these things may remember back during this year's Toy Fair it was announced that for some inexplicable reason the Shibajuku Girls doll line was planning a comeback. For reference: These 13" dolls from the Australian toy company Hunter Products originally turned up on shelves in the US back in the mid-2010's, to a fairly lackluster reception. Between their unusually high price point ($30-$35, a good deal above the average for fashion dolls at the time) and the fact that they are a rather blatant knock-off of Pullips, no one seemed to be that into them. In a way with their hair play gimmick (a lot of charms and hair clips) meant to interest children in Japanese street fashion I suppose one could see them as a precursor of the Decora Girlz, albeit with far lazier and less successful execution. I did end up buying one--Yoko--for the big head collection, and she's...fine, if forgettable. I like having her in the mix for variety, but I could never quite work up the enthusiasm to get another. The demise of ToysRUs around the time of their release probably didn't help matters any, as it was one of the few places that stocked them. These dolls lingered on the shelves of my local Target seemingly forever, before quietly disappearing to absolutely no fanfare.
But to bring it back to Toy Fair 2024--
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For reasons that NO ONE I've heard speak on the subject can quite understand, seemingly out of nowhere Hunter Toys showed up at Toy Fair this year with a display of older dolls from the first two waves of Shibajuku, plus a wall of these mock-ups for a projected third series of anime-inspired characters. If you look closely at the 'prototype photos' in the boxes--not actual dolls--they appear to literally just be restyled Pullips. A lot of people (myself included) speculated that they may have put the money into creating a new head sculpt that more closely replicated the doll this line was always made to emulate, and the lack of actual dolls in boxes was a sign that this Shibajuku 2.0 head had yet to go into production in time for the event.
Turns out--no. That's not what they did at all. So--
A few days ago through a series of random browsing encounters I stumbled across listings for two of the five proposed 'Shibajuku Anime' dolls on Walmart's website. They are showing up as out of stock, but if you put them on your wishlist you can add them to your cart from there (though not check out), which is a pretty sure indication that they're expected in stock online and in stores soon.
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So...what to say about these. First of all they quite obviously have the same old Shibajuku face. The fashions have considerably less detail than the prototype photos, which in itself I'd be willing to forgive for reasons I'll get to in a minute, but the main thing that overwhelmingly stands out to me here is that Kiki, one of the two characters shown with a darker complexion in the mock-ups, has gone from having tan skin and white hair to pale skin and black hair. Which, yeah no fuck that. No way of knowing if this was the brand's decision or a specific request from Walmart, but whichever way you slice it, it sucks. Lack of diversity was a huge issue with the first iteration of this line, and after the promise of a course correct it looks like we're back to more of the same. I will definitely be bending a critical eye on them to see if the other dark-skinned character, Sakura, receives a similar whitewashing :/
Now, with that rant out of my system, is there anything good to say? Well, the price, for one. These are set to retail for $19.98, which is significantly below what they sold for originally. No doubt the lower quality fashions and lack of accessories have a lot to do with it, but on the whole I'd say it's a plus. Also...as much as as I would have loved to see the ensuing drama if they had had the audacity to churn out a more blatant Pullip clone, for continuity's sake if nothing else I'm glad they stuck with the old face. She's a weird little bird and despite it all she deserves her place in the wider family of Big Head dolls, however derivative that might be (I mean, if anything Pullip needs MORE clones, Blythe has such a start on her in that arena....).
And finally (FINALLY) to wrap things up--will I be buying one? Perhaps surprisingly--yes! I plan to order Akira when she becomes available to ship. I think she's decently cute--you all know my bias for green hair--and I have a purely academic curiosity to compare her to my 'classic' Shibajuku. Plus, despite all my dismissive snark, I would actually like to see this relaunch be successful. I'm always in favor of diversity in the doll market, and this particular type of doll has been sadly under-represented of late. There is plenty room on the shelves for more big head girlies! MGA is daily signing that real estate away at an increasingly rapid pace XD My hope is that they do well enough to warrant the release of the other three dolls from the proposed new line-up, and that maybe--MAYBE--if the Dolly Gods are kind we will see Sakura with her original dark skin tone, as intended.
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee ok that's enough sleep-procrastinating for one night, I'm done. If anyone else cares about this at all I'm sincerely curious to hear your thoughts.
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Question: how do you feel about Black writers with Black OCs with traits that may fit certain stereotypes at first glance? For example, one of my OCs is a psychologist. She's intelligent enough to have 2 doctorates, and a gentle hearted therapist.
I'm worried because she might fall into the Mammy trope. Giving too much of herself to build others up. Part of the reason I made her with that specific profession is because I never see Black women in mental health. Definitely not in fiction and honestly? Barely IRL. We are nurses but never doctors. I'm not sure if my intent outweighs what may be on the surface.
What do you think?
[I love your blog and your work. I have had to look at my own OCs harder and I thank you for giving me the tools to question and better myself. ]
To your example: My good sis, I'm going to give you the same answer I give everyone else!
There's nothing wrong with your character off rip. I'm glad that you're writing that representation you want to see! You've already done some of the footwork here- recognizing that she gives too much of herself to lift others up! How do you as the writer treat that? Do you recognize that? Is it your intention that your readers say "hey, she sure does this a lot, is she going to care for herself?" Does your plot intend to address this within her and allow her to grow, which may mean letting others care for her, or putting some of that weight down on her own? Or do you treat her as though that's just Her Role and everyone else (usually white characters) benefits from that?
As for your first question, it honestly depends. I usually have more grace for the intentions of Black writers, mainly bc I expect that we are more aware of what we're writing about ourselves. For example, I can watch Menace II Society and go "ah! Okay. Yeah there are gang bangers here, but they are there to tell a specific story. This is not what the author thinks we all are, this is them telling about the world around them". Unfortunately I can't have that much grace off rip with nonblack writers.
That said, if something is a stereotype, it's gone be a stereotype regardless of who wrote it. Antiblackness is very often perpetuated by Black people who may have certain destructive beliefs about themselves. I think Soul Food is the most misogynoiristic films I've ever seen, and it's written and directed by a Black man 😅 So yeah, we can always take time to step back and look at how we can improve our own work.
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discordiansamba · 3 days
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thinking about Mai and maiko in the avatar Zuko AU... I'm soft for it.
Zuko isn't expecting to come across Mai in Omashu, of all places. He wasn't expecting the Fire Nation to be able to conquer the city either, given that it's earthbender king was crazy strong (and also just. generally crazy), but that's a different kind of problem. It's not that hard to guess that her father was appointed as the new governor of Omashu.
he... kind of saves Mai and her family from the assassination attempt without even really thinking about it. When she chases after them, their eyes meet for a long moment, and she freezes. She knew that Zuko had been banished to the Earth Kingdom, and she'd heard the rumors that he was working with the Avatar... but she wasn't sure she believed the latter.
(except, some tiny part of her did, if only just because it meant Zuko was definitely alive.)
But here he is. In Omashu. With two Earth Kingdom kids (which one is the Avatar?) He definitely just saved her life, but then he vanishes. She doesn't know what to think. When Azula shows up, she holds her tongue. Maybe she saw wrong. Maybe that wasn't Zuko at all. He'd seemed... very different.
Aang and Toph grill Zuko about why he saved her. She's just a childhood friend, that's all, Zuko says. No need to read into it.
(they don't believe him for a second)
Mai's little brother goes missing. Her parents assume that the rebels kidnapped him, and arrange a trade for him. (She wonders if they would ever bother to do the same for her.) When the rebels show up, Mai definitely can't deny that Zuko is with them this time, not in broad daylight.
...Zuko turns out to be the Avatar. Azula decides that it's her duty to hunt him down and kill him. Azula smiles, and asks her if that will be a problem. You don't have to accompany me if you still have feelings for him, she says, with a glint in her eye that says she won't actually take no for an answer.
Mai agrees. It won't be a problem.
(It sounds a lot like a lie to her ears.)
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pola-rola · 22 hours
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I am the one hiding under your stairs, fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair ~♪ Thank you so much for the templates, @ai-kan1 <3
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Based on no character in particular, a ghost that roams the halls, finding joy and solace in scaring new students and "fixing" potions. Although he was orientated by a mirror to Pomefiore, he is not particularly tied to this specific dorm, and sees no harm in regularly visiting other dorms, including Ramshackle, where his three oldest closest friends reside. (Although Ignihyde is definitely his favorite because it has spinning chairs there lol) ___________
June was a self-motivated and confident child from an early age. The absence of a family did not stop him from immersing himself in his studies, so that over time he could proudly show the world the results of his hard work. So the appearance of the Black Carriage in front of him was the happiest moment in his short life. Of course, the coolest, strongest and most responsible Headmage is there! Maybe he will take him under his wing and teach him everything that will help him become just as amazing? Well.. The boy was disappointed. In any case! Pomefiore was not the dorm he was hoping for, but who cares, he will become the coolest in any dorm, and soon he will take the place of the housewarden, right? Overblot. Not his. Some student. Too strong, to the detriment of himself and others. The entire school was terrified of this terrible incident. Luckily, no one was seriously injured. No one, except for one freshman, poor thing, what bad luck…
"He was controlling some black spikes or something… I remember one of those things flying straight towards my head and that's go dark... When I opened my eyes, the sky was clear again and I was surrounded by ghosts. They were sympathizing with me and complaining about how young and unlucky I was. I have no idea where my body is, although I guess I don't need it anymore." ____________
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Dom. hand: None "Have you ever felt like both your hands are left?" During life, June was right-handed. As a ghost, both of his hands seemed to stop working well. He could still do the usual things, like hold things and stuff. But writing and doing any neat work became difficult, like… Well, like doing anything with your non-dominant hand. - Dislikes: Awkward conversations "Yeah, I was named after a month." "No, "it" wasn't hurt." "No, I'm not going to tell you what it's like to be a ghost." "No, I'm not going to fly right through you on purpose." "What difference does it make to you how old I am?" "Stop asking questions like that!" - Talent: Change body forms
"Something that makes me different from other ghosts"? Oh, you mean my legs? Heh, the perks of being young. And smart, I guess. Study hard and you'll be like me someday. No, that's not what I meant-"
So, my hc is that ghosts can show their full body form (I think ghosts with legs are creepier, by the way), but they don't see the point in it. It also takes energy, and that's what it takes to be visible to humans. June prefers to show his full form, though he modifies it a bit. You don't want to see his ghost like he looked right after the incident, right? He's not a monster to scare poor students THAT much. ̶a̶l̶t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶f̶u̶n̶ "I'm not actually changing clothes, it's just an illusion." Ghosts remain in the clothes they were wearing when they became ghosts. However, if necessary, they are quite capable of visualizing the outfit that suits the occasion. Something simple, though. Pomefiore uniform appears on him when he gets to the dorm, but in other cases he either wears a school uniform or creates other, simple outfits. By the way, in more "capey" outfits, his bottom looks the same as other ghosts (like the bottom of Eliza's dress), for example in the Ceremonial robes, because its shape is already quite difficult to maintain due to all these patterns.
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"Salpa" I'm not Floyd, so it was a bit hard to come up with a fishy nickname right off the bat. Of course, I think "Jellyfish" would suit him better, but since the nickname is already taken, what can you do.. In any case, I dug around on the Internet and found the most ghost-like sea creature IMO. Pretty creepy thing, I tell you…
"Monsieur Badluck"
Cutie-patootie Rook was unshakably convinced that the student from their dorm had fallen proudly in a heroic battle long ago, and not simply died due to his own stupidity and self-confidence. It was hard to talk him out of "Chevalier des Blots" and agree that it was just an unfortunate incident…
His feelings towards Jade is like "Oh, look at that cute smile 😍 Wait, why is he smirking like that 💀 Oh, he's so handsome when he's focused 😍 Wtf of mushrooms is he talking about 💀 You're so cute I love you 😍 What the hell, why are you such a weirdo dude💀"
________ ̶W̶h̶y̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶s̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶H̶e̶a̶d̶m̶a̶g̶e̶?̶ _________________________________ phew, that's all. thank you if you read all my chatter here, take a meme („• ֊ •„)
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mustainegf · 3 hours
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IMAGINE CLEANING UP JAMES AFTER HE GOT IN A FIGHT W DAVE AND HES LIKE UPSET BECAUSE LIKE DAVE ALWAYS DOES THAT OR SMTH OMG😽😽
STOP OMG THIS IS SUCH A CUTE IDEA
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𝐁𝐑𝐔𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐒 ¹⁹⁸²
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I sat on the couch in the small living room in El Cerrito, flipping through a magazine that I had already read at least three times. I wasn't really paying much heed to the words. My mind kept drifting back to James.
He'd been spending more time with the band lately, and I knew it meant a lot to him. Metallica was starting to gain momentum, and while I could see the gleam in his eye when he spoke about their music, I could also see the strain. There was friction between him and Dave Mustaine, their lead guitarist. Dave could be volatile sometimes, a mess of anger and talent and booze. James had said more than once how it was like walking on eggshells around him.
I listened to the creak of the front door. First to step inside was James, followed by Ron, their bassist. But it was James that had my full attention. His face was a mess, blood trickling from a split lip, a darkening bruise setting across his cheek and eye, and a cut just above his eyebrow. He'd gone twelve rounds in a boxing ring by the look of him.
“Jesus, James, what happened?" I shot up from the couch.
"Nothing," he muttered, eyes flashing with anger. He winced, wiping his mouth off on the back of his hand, smearing the blood.
Ron let out a tired sigh, full of exasperation. "Dave. Again."
Irritation took hold of me. I hadn't expected this. I turned to James, still standing in the doorway, lost and furious all at the same time, mostly confused.
"Come on, let's get ya cleaned up," I said softer now. James didn't argue, which just told me how bad he was feeling.
We walked down the narrow hall toward the bathroom, and I flipped on the light. The harsh fluorescent bulb buzzed on, lighting up the tiny tiled room. I motioned that he take a seat on the edge of the tub. He sank down onto it slowly as if he were an old man whose bones ached from years of hard work.
I pulled a washcloth from the shelf and turned the tap, running the water warm. There was something in the air, something that was only ever there when James and I were alone. I dipped the cloth in, wrung it out, then hunched to my knees in front of him.
"This might sting a bit," I whispered, laying the cloth to the cut above his eyebrow.
He winced, but didn't pull away. Instead, he locked eyes with me, those beautiful, innocent blues. It was just us, his breath blending with mine, the sound of water dripping from the cloth, the warmth of his skin beneath my fingers.
"What happened, James?" I whispered. I was still looking at his injuries, saddened that James had become a punching bag or sorts for Dave. James was always shy, reserved, that just made him an easier target.
He was stuttering, his struggling to find their first move. "Dave's dog… it jumped up onto Ron's car, scratched the paint... I… I pushed it away. I didn't wanna hurt it or anything, but Dave… um well, you know how he is when he's had a few drinks."
I nodded, encouraging him to continue. I knew Dave could be a nasty drunk, but I needed to hear the rest.
"He just lost it. Swung at me before I even knew what was happening. And… I'm not a fighter, you know that. I didn't want to fight him, but fuck, I couldn't just stand there and take it either."
Guilt was overtaking his gaze. He was always the first to beat himself up over something, to take on blame that wasn't entirely his. That was one of the things I admired about him, his feeling, his empathy.
"I feel like shit," he muttered, his voice breaking just a little. "Not just cause of the fight, but… I shouldn't have shoved the dog. I didn't mean to hurt it."
"You were just trying to protect Ron's car," I said, moving the cloth to his split lip, dabbing away the dried blood. "Dave overreacted, and you know it. Yeah maybe you did something shitty, that doesn't give Dave the right to beat the living shit out of you." I scoff.
He let out a shaking breath and leaned into my contact, soaking into the cloth and leaving the shy young man he really was. "Maybe. But I hate this. All of it. The fighting, the... We're supposed to be makin' fuckin' music."
My heart broke for him. Beneath it all, feelings we had toward one another hovered just on the edge, begging to reach each other, to meet and forever bind.
"I know, James. I know." I continued to clean his wounds slowly. "You're trying your best. That's all anyone can ask."
"Thanks," he whispered finally. "For bein' here, you know..."
"Where else would I be?" I whispered, mainly in an attempt to lighten the moment, though it was obvious to anybody that my words were anything but casual. I couldn't fathom me being anywhere else at a time when he needed me.
When I was done, I rinsed the cloth and folded it neatly, placing it on the sink. I turned back to him an, before I could really think about was I was doing, I leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his bruised cheek, careful not to apply too much pressure to his wound.
The seconds stuck to our hearts, hardening like candy, a glaze to not be forgotten. His skin was warm beneath my lips, and I could feel the faint little indents of his acne scarring, something that I'd always found cute about him. When I pulled back, our eyes stuck once more. Maybe we weren't ready to put it into words yet, but it was there, tying us together, tightening.
"I'm here, James. I'll always be here," I murmured, knowing he would understand the underlying meaning.
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triciaisonline · 2 days
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I have a crazy theory, based on literally nothing - just something I think would be wild to do... IT INVOLVES KNOWLEDGE OF THE ALLEGED FUNKO LEAK (which we don't know the validity of yet) so do not read if you want to remain unaware of it
This is just a theory, and it's probably totally wrong - but I was just thinking of all these pieces and a way they could fit... this is also going to bounce all over the place as I type in a stream of consciousness.
Okay, so it's not fully formed yet - and it connects to another theory that has been circulating. This is just being written off the cuff, so it's not going to properly formulated but....
The alleged leak, shows two pop figures: Rio as Lady Death (just labeled as Death) and Teen as Wiccan. Now these things are not entirely shocking as people speculated these for a bit.
SEE HERE
Now, I had a mini theory that Teen was so obviously Wiccan that it would be really funny if the character took the Wiccan mantle but then wasn't Billy. I'm not saying I think that's what's going to happen - just that it would be a good twist because it toys with out expectations and would remind audiences of the twists with Pierto and Agatha in WandaVision. So, this sort of follows that - but in a different way.
My new clown theory is: Teen is Nicholas Scratch - but leaning into the villian background of the character, is trying to make Agatha think he's Billy. Wild to say, I know - but my crazy clown theory goes as follows:
I think there's more symbolism in the Agnes of Westview part than we believed. When "Agnes" is first seen in her house, she's having the end of a terrible day and is pissed off at the appearance of Rio. She goes to a bedroom that's meant to symbolize the loss of her son, and that's when Rio shows up at her door. It's in the scene that follows that Rio asks her: do you remember why you hate me?
I think this line got forgotten a bit in the fight scene that ensued - because it seemed to imply that Agatha had done Rio wrong at some point, which may be true - but perhaps it was in response to something Rio did first. Why would Agatha hate Rio if Agatha was the only one at fault? We see Agatha interacting with other witches while she's not the most friendly, there's something deep there with Rio.
I am positing that Rio is the one who caused Agatha to lose Nicholas - not Agatha. Now, I'm not saying this to remove Agatha's agency in her wrong doings - but that's something that could justify that hatred. I also think the timing of that initial scene makes me think we are meant to connect subconsciously the two events. I think Agatha's response is what somehow led her to getting on Rio's bad side and perhaps led to her gaining the Darkhold (or book of the dead, I'm forgetting atm if they are one and the same in this version of things). Which Agatha has tried to use to get her son back/get revenge... and as it's want to do, it took Agatha preexisting flaws and exacerbated them in its corruption as we saw with Wanda.
Now, how does this connect to my bold guess? Well, we assume that her son is dead - like a child sacrifice, as that's the comments others have made. But there's more than one way to suffer loss. Nicholas is an antagonist in the original comics, he even frames his mother at one point for horrific crimes. Is it possible that Nicholas was offered up not for death, but taken by whomever is at the center of this to and turned against her?
Teen's comments in the Agnes of Westview interrogation about the homelife she lives are very interesting and seemingly out of character for the rest of his portrayal as an Agatha fan boy. Teen has clearly done a lot of research, and the events of Westview are implied to be public knowledge. Could Teen be Nicholas - either of his own volition or working for someone else (put a pin in this part) - intentionally trying to trick her? The sigil, was it placed by himself or someone he's working with, in order to not be recognized?
"Okay, but how about the Wiccan pop figure leak?" --- okay, so the show is being so obvious about who Teen is possibly.... but the team has done this bait and switch before in WandaVision. Maybe it's obvious because it's meant to trick us and the characters? Maybe Teen is trying to invoke the idea of Wanda's kids - someone Agatha has complex history with, but also knew the kids of. The pop has Teen in very Wanda looking costume pieces. Could it be that it's meant to be on the nose on purpose?
What about Rio? Well, the leak depicts Rio as Lady Death. We have also seen the Tarot card promotional images that back this. Now, if Rio is a fake identity or becomes possessed by Death- no way of knowing. Lady Death often is an antagonistic figure as well, could this plan of Teen's be connected or guided by Rio/Lady Death? Perhaps in some sense of vengeance? It's implied Agatha has killed many in her long life - that could be a connection as well. Plus, it's a small note - but the trailers have that line from Rio focusing on how the bodies are piling up.
TAROT PROMO HERE
Lilia had the vision/hallucination that expressed a desire/need to Protect Agatha. Why? Because she's being played. Rio sets the Salem Seven on Agatha, which makes her desperate enough to go on the Road. The thing Teen wants to get her to go on. Rio also seemingly has interacted with Teen while Agatha was Agnes. Since so much of that was happening in Agatha's house - and she didn't react to them at all? That's strange, unless she already expected him to be there. The Salem Seven are Nicholas' kids in comics, turned against their Grandmother Agatha as additional antagonists. Now, they might not be his kids in this version, we don't know yet - but there might be a connection. "But the Seven attacked Nicholas?" Well, either it was an act or his sigil has him blinded to them as well. So, they could all be working on the same team to sell it.
Teen was also strong enough to break Wanda's spell. Something we've only seen Agatha do in this specific corner of the MCU. Similar magical power, perhaps because of powerful influence and/or being related to her.
Another note - how does Rio end up on the Road? She's not with the coven. If Rio is Lady Death - the death of Sharon Davis might be an opening for her to arrive...
This is all over the place, but I feel there's a possible link here. It's likely not, but it was fun to think about !!!
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thatgirlwithasquid · 2 days
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letters that i can never send
words: 25,571
Chrissy/Tina | Teen and Up Audiences | POV Tina | Ghost Chrissy Cunningham | Letters | Right Person Wrong Time | Unhappy Ending
beyond excited to get to share my fic for @sapphicstevents' stranger things sapphic mini bang!! writing it definitely fought me for a while but i'm really proud of this fic.
so here's the first chapter and a cover i threw together to post it with! the whole fic is up on ao3 here, and @hullomoon has been amazing and created a podfic of the work for anyone interested in listening <3
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Chapter 1 : A Pack Of Green Scrunchies
words: 5,739
June 20th, 1986
Dear Chrissy,
I wish I had known you before everything went mad. 
I think I told you that before, but I mean it now more than I meant it then. It feels so crazy to think that we went through school walking past each other in the halls and not even glancing in each other’s direction. I know that I did the same thing to other kids but it still feels impossible.
My mom took me out to the mall the other day—there’s a mall in this town, not like the destroyed one in Hawkins. It’s full of people and stores and it's loud. I didn’t like it. I always used to find it annoying how quiet Hawkins was sometimes, but I hate how loud it is here. There’s too many people talking and smiling and I can’t see them without thinking about how oblivious I was before I met you.
They were selling scrunchies in one of the stores. My mom was looking for a new purse but I stopped to look at them instead. I bought a pack of green ones because they made me think of you. I wonder if that’s what you would smell like; cotton fabric and lingering perfume from my wrist.
I miss you. 
Tina.
The lights in the hospital waiting room hum with an electric static. Even under all the anxious chatter and background noise of the hospital, it’s the only thing Tina can hear. Well, that and the fading ringing in her ears.
Her hands clench and unclench around the hem of her shirt as she watches the minutes tick by. Beside her, her dad’s leg bounces up and down. She’s not sure if he’s aware of her watching him. The man stares ahead down the crowded hall through the chaos as if her mother will suddenly appear there, good as new.
Tina doesn’t say anything, just reaches out and entwines their fingers, letting out a sigh of relief as her father squeezes her hand back. She needs his strength to lean on. It doesn’t matter that, rationally, Tina knows her mother’s injuries from the earthquake were far from the most severe that came through those hospital doors today.
She’s never been more scared than she was when her dad came stumbling out of the rubble, shirt bloodied and with her mom’s arm over his shoulder to support her weight. Tina had been so frantic that she can’t even remember if her mother had been conscious at that point. She was out cold during the drive to the hospital, though; the sounds of ambulances and firetrucks and police cars responding to the destruction weren’t even enough to break her from her state. Her father had somehow remained stoic then, too.
Thankfully, it’s not too much longer before a nurse lets them visit her mom. After hours of waiting, they’re more than ready to see how she’s doing. 
With all the trouble caused during the disaster, her mom is crammed into a room with other people, separated only by a flimsy curtain. Around them, the relieved reconciliation of other patients and their families fade into the background as Tina reaches her mother’s side and grasps at her hand where it lays atop her blankets. 
IVs poke into her skin and wires trail off to monitors she doesn’t even begin to want to look at. Instead, Tina focuses her gaze on her mom’s weary face. She looks tired, eyes rimmed with dark circles that are only accentuated by the pale colouring of her skin. But she seems okay, all things considered, and Tina sighs out in a relieved whoosh of breath.
The nurse goes over her mom’s condition with her dad, but Tina hardly takes in a word—the moment the nurse confirms that her mom will be okay, she tunes her out entirely. Instead, Tina drinks in the sight of her mom, brushing a careful thumb over her scraped knuckles and almost tearing up when her mom gives her a small smile in return.
Eventually, the nurse hurries off again and Tina’s dad slumps into a chair beside the bed. Tina barely glances his way, too scared to look away from her mom, convinced that if she so much as takes her eyes off her, something terrible will happen again.
“Tina,” her mom sighs. “I’m okay. You don’t need to look so worried.”
Tina shakes her head.
“I was so scared,” she manages, voice cracking under the tears she spent so long suppressing. They finally rush down her face in a flood of emotion, tasting salty where they converge in the corners of her mouth.
“Oh, baby,” her mom says, voice softening. “It’s going to be okay now, okay? Why don’t you go and get some rest, you look exhausted.”
Tina can’t help but laugh at that, an ironic, choking thing. “I look exhausted?”
“Well,” her mom smiles before shifting slightly and doing her best to smother a wince. “I’m already laying down and getting rest. I’m more worried about you.”
Guilt stabs Tina’s heart like a blade. Her mom’s the one in a hospital bed, with doctors and nurses hovering around outside to help if needed, and yet Tina’s the one acting like the world’s weighing down on her shoulders. It’s shameful in its own way. 
Tina always thought she was strong enough to be her parents’ equal. She did well enough in school and had plenty of friends; her parents saw how grown up she was and even helped her plan her Halloween parties; her mom told her everything—every annoying thing someone at work said, every snippy little complaint about her dad forgetting to hang the washing out…
And here she is now. Comforting Tina like she’s a little kid in need of a nap and not a seventeen-year-old who should be better than this. So, she shakes her head, plastering on a smile even as her eyes sting with another wave of tears and, admittedly, exhaustion.
Before she can put up much protest, her dad pipes up to agree with her mom. It doesn’t leave enough room for anything more than Tina going along with what they want. Her dad almost follows before he hesitates, catching her mom’s eye. She nods back at him.
“Why don’t you see about finding some dinner for us two? I won’t be far behind you, I just need to have a talk with your mom.”
What is Tina supposed to do about that other than leave? She’s obligated to listen to her parents, even if she wants to stay. Besides, she’s sure she’ll be visiting her mom as often as she can until she’s discharged. 
So, it’s fine. All this is fine.
When she gets to the door, Tina turns and looks back at her parents one last time. With all the other people talking in the room, she can’t make out what her parents are discussing. What she can make out is the way her father’s face pinches into a concerned frown. 
Whatever it is they wanted to talk over without her must be serious. Resigned, Tina sets off in search of the cafeteria. It feels strange, pushing on through crowds of the distraught and the injured. Against her better judgement, her eyes catch and linger on the horror around her. 
Nothing will ever be the same after this, not in Hawkins at least. Too much bad has happened, too much to even let herself think about.
By the time her dad finds her in the cafeteria that evening, the dinner that Tina bought them has long since gone cold.
School doesn’t reopen until a week later—a week filled with funerals and clean up and searching for anyone still buried under the rubble. During that time, Tina recovers what she can from her trashed house to cram into some other girl’s bedroom. She should probably count her lucky stars that its usual inhabitant left for college a year ago, otherwise she would be knocking elbows in this little space—seemingly so much smaller than her own room was.
She longs for home: for her corkboard of polaroids of herself and her friends, for each marker line creeping up her door frame dedicated to a year of her life, for her fuzzy blue blanket, and for so many more little comforts that she had taken for granted. Staying here, in someone else’s bedroom while her dad stays on the pull-out downstairs, makes her feel strangely like a jigsaw piece jammed into the wrong puzzle.
There’s nothing to be done about that, with the roof of her house half-collapsed it’s not like they have much choice other than this. She is grateful that her dad’s work friend—Mr. Daniels—took them in, but that doesn’t stop her longing for what she’s lost.
Returning to class brings back none of the normality she longs for, either. Sure, the cracks in the road outside have been hastily paved over for the most part and the classrooms have been deemed safe to return to despite whatever state the earthquake had left them in, but everything has so clearly shifted…
All Tina sees, everywhere she looks, are the empty seats. The ones from kids whose families fled the town are one thing, one type of grief for the friends she’s not sure she’ll ever see again. The rest are something else entirely, vacant seats that will never be filled; those seats offer no question to their absence in Tina’s life.
So far, she has been to eight funerals. Three of them were some of her best friends. She didn’t sleep the nights after any of those. After the last one, she hasn’t been able to bring herself to attend any more; it turns out that there’s only so many bodies you can handle saying goodbye to within such a short period of time.
Mr. Clarke clears his throat, trying to recapture the forlorn attention of the room. Even he can’t seem to muster a genuine smile so Tina doesn’t know how he expects the students to care about any of this. Honestly, she’s surprised the school has even bothered swapping teachers to fill in for staff absences with how little chance they have at passing their exams after all this. If their grief wasn’t enough, having a teacher so clearly unprepared to deal with older kids isn’t going to help them learn at all.
She remembers Mr. Clarke from middle school and almost, very briefly, feels bad for thinking poorly of him. He’d been a nice enough teacher. She’s sure he’s still nice enough, but she just doesn’t have it in her to care about stuff like that anymore. Not after everything. She’s not sure how she fits into this new, broken version of Hawkins; how the hell should she be able to care about how everyone else fits in?
Slowly, the eyes of the class do raise to the man where he stands, squirming at the front of the room, backdropped by the chalkboard covered in scrawled science Tina hasn’t understood a word of. She can’t help but think that their usual teacher would have explained it in a way that made so much more sense to her.
She doesn’t know if that teacher is one of the leavers or worse.
Everyone sits quietly as Mr. Clarke stumbles his way through telling them about the commemorative assembly that is going to be held in the gym. Both schools will be coming together in a few days time to remember their lost friends, or at least that’s the plan.
Silence hangs in the air for another excruciating moment. Then the whispering finally begins. Names get thrown around, ones Tina is sure must belong to the dead.
“Jason,” someone whispers.
“Carol,” says another.
“Nicole—”
The whispering gets cut off abruptly by the scraping of a chair as it’s shoved out from under its desk. Some kid launches himself to his feet and stalks out of the room, eyes red-rimmed. Behind him, the classroom door slams shut on a spluttering Mr. Clarke.
Whispers start up again in the wake of his sudden departure. This time, Tina tunes them out. Instead, she sets her thoughts adrift, steering away from anything too dour to think on. She doesn’t want to deal with this today. They’ve only been back at school for a day. 
She isn’t ready for this yet. It doesn’t feel like there has been nearly enough time for any of them to come to terms with this. How the hell are they going to get through these last two months of school and—
“Tina!”
Blinking back to her senses, Tina looks up, across the lunch table and to whoever called her name. It’s Vicki, looking at her with wide, concerned eyes. She probably should be concerned, Tina can only vaguely recall walking to the cafeteria, she’d been so trapped in her own mind.
“Sorry, what did you say?” she asks.
It’s just the two of them, perched on the edge of a sparsely populated table. Their group used to be a lot bigger.
“I—” Vicki starts, hesitates, and then leverages a painfully forced smile onto her face. “I asked if you figured out what you wanted to do at college yet.”
She wants to wince, to cringe away from the inane topic. It makes her feel sick to pretend that everything is normal. People died, other people got hurt, the town is a mess. Why would they be worrying about stuff like this as if it means anything at all anymore?
“I don’t know. With my mom in the hospital everything’s changed. I haven’t had time to think about it.”
Vicki squirms uncomfortably at her confrontational tone, looking chastised. It makes her deflate a little, feeling suddenly very cruel. Just because Tina doesn’t know how to play at being normal, doesn’t mean she has to be such an ass to her friend over it. She still cares about her and being a bitch is only going to drive a wedge between them. It’s not like she has many friends left after everything, either.
Her hands tremble in her lap and she shakes them out as if that might banish some of her simmering nerves. It doesn’t. With a tense kind of control, Tina pushes up to her feet. Vicki’s eyes swivel up to her, surprised by the abrupt shift.
“Bathroom,” Tina chokes out, trying to tamper down the frustration in her voice.
“Tina…” Vicki starts but Tina is already walking away.
The lighting in the bathroom is dingy and off-putting, and yet the electric buzzing of those fluorescents still puts her in mind of sterile hospital walls. Her mom’s been making a great recovery, she reminds herself. She’ll be home before she knows it. Maybe then everything will start going back to normal.
The porcelain basin of the sink stares, glaringly white up at her as she leans over, splashing her face with metallic-tasting water from the old taps. Her ragged breaths send speckles of water back into it as it drips in trails down her face. She’s probably smudged her makeup now, and it didn’t even help at all.
With a choked sob, Tina turns her face upwards, meeting the paled expression of her reflection; eyes wide, droplets of water clinging to mascara-tinted lashes. But that’s not all she sees.
A sick feeling of horror settles deep in her stomach as she notices something from the corner of her eye—something hovering behind her, in the corner of the bathroom. The room had been empty when she came in. Heart hammering, startled by being snuck up on, Tina whirls around to see—
Nothing.
Just an empty, dingy, school bathroom. The green doors of toilet stalls stare back at her impassively as she clutches a hand to her chest, willing her racing pulse to settle.
It was nothing. It was her mind playing tricks on her. It had to be nothing. Because if not, how could she explain that fleeting glimpse of the ghost of Chrissy Cunningham?
Tina’s pen taps restlessly against the Daniels’ kitchen table, the only sound in the eerily silent house.
Sharing a living space with another family comes with all the chaos one would expect, with each of their routines clashing loudly and incompatibly as they stumble around each other each morning and night. And yet the quiet moments like this are almost worse, when everyone is out working or visiting the hospital or whatever else it is these people do. Aside from Tina, it’s empty. Abandoned, almost, like the rest of this god-forsaken ghost town.
She scratches a frustrated line through her pitiful homework attempt and pushes it away across the table, out of sight and out of mind as she stares distractedly out the window. The chair she sits on creaks as she leans to the side, trying to look out into the street. Usually at this time of the evening, kids would be running around, excited and playing in the warm spring air. Usually parents would be seen and heard, trying to cajole their kids inside for whatever they had cooked up or ordered in for dinner.
Tonight, there is nothing but a creeping sunset that paints the sky a dull pink, like drops of blood diluted in a lake of blue. There is no one finding time to play, and no one enjoying a peaceful evening, and Tina’s parents aren’t here. It’s just her, alone with her anxious mind.
She should be at the hospital, trying her best to be there for her dad and checking in on her mom. But going there again and again felt like poisoning herself, losing herself in worry that would set her heart pounding and mind spiralling. It doesn’t matter to her scared brain that she knows her mom is doing much better, she still can’t help but feel sick with worry.
And she’s so tired. It makes visiting her mom so difficult because her mom gives her this pitiful, concerned look whenever she sees her like this. Tina just can’t take that; being a burden to her parents instead of a place of support. They have nothing to be worried about, really. It— She’s just tired…
She can’t sleep with worrying about if something happened to her mom in the night, or if another earthquake might come to completely level this damn town. And what’s more, her mind hasn’t been able to stray far from the thought of what she saw—or what she thinks she saw—in that damn bathroom. Any time her mind has a chance to wander, her thoughts get inevitably dragged back to that sight.
She had only glimpsed her for a fleeting moment but that had been enough. Enough to see the shape of blood splatters on her cheer uniform and the inhuman pallor of her skin… Now, every sound—every creaking shift of this unfamiliar house, every car driving by, every sudden noise—leaves her jumping, expecting to see something horrific around her as if she’s being tormented by some twisted apparition. She hates it.
She should know better than this, she doesn’t even believe in ghosts! Whatever she saw must just be a trick of the mind. And yet.
With a frustrated groan, Tina pushes her chair out from the table and stands. Sitting around like this is doing her no good, either. It’s like she can’t escape any of this worry for even a second. Or, at least, she can’t when crammed into too-small rooms that have no space for the shape of her grief.
Her loaned keys chime against each other as she snatches them from the countertop. She just needs to get out of the house, walk around and clear her head. Maybe then all this anxiety can start to dissipate and the memory of that hallucination will fade.
Locking the door behind her, Tina wanders off in whatever direction her feet decide to take her. 
The air is clear outside and she hopes that might ease some of the tension that she has been holding, coiled and aching, within her. It’s hard to remember that she doesn’t need to be prepared for something awful to happen, because chances are nothing will.
She wishes she believed that.
Every time she blinks back to awareness, she finds herself on a different stretch of road that she can’t recall making the conscious choice to head to. This walk clearly isn’t doing anything for her. Clear her mind? What a ridiculous idea. How the hell could a place as fucked up as Hawkins bring her any relief, no matter where she might go or what she might do? It’s like the only thing her body knows how to do here anymore is to run on autopilot—to keep her body moving as her thoughts keep on spiralling.
She stills, taking a frustrated breath and at least trying to keep track of where she’s ended up. Her eyes scan her surroundings, taking note of how the efforts to fix up the town haven't reached this far yet, great deep cracks still clear and precariously crisscrossing the roads, splitting the asphalt open to reveal the exposed bowels of the earth.
It’s not something she’s that surprised by. Ahead of her, the road turns off into the trailer park. It makes sense that no one has prioritised fixing up things around here. With the abandoned yellow streamers of police tape, catching and glinting in the golden hour, it’s only too easy to remember what happened here all too recently.
Tina cringes at the sight of them, dancing in the gentle breeze like they don’t know what they mean. Like they don’t know a girl was massacred inside that place. Still, she can’t quite tear her eyes away. For a long, breathless moment, she just stares, caught in the bone-deep wrongness of that place. And then, like ice slithering down her spine, a stomach-churning feeling of horror settles upon her. It takes a hold in her chest before she even realises the cause of it.
Just barely visible from this far away, lingering in the window of the Munson’s trailer, is the shape of a person, standing stock-still. The longer she stares, breaths shallow and fast under the weight of that settling dread, the more the distant shape seems to resemble a girl, its silhouette becoming more convincingly feminine as that agonising second draws out longer and longer, running on forever as her gaze refuses to budge from the sight.
It’s like time has stopped. 
Tina doesn’t realise she’s stepping away until her feet scuff against the uneven ground and she nearly loses her balance. That, at least, is enough to break her out of her trance even if the terror sinking into her stomach refuses to dissipate; she rips her gaze away from the trailer as if burned. It feels like the shape of that figure is scorched into her retina now.
Unwilling to look back at that window, Tina runs.
Sitting through the commemorative assembly in the school’s gymnasium is like pulling teeth. Every word jars her, striking through with pained awareness of how overcrowded the room is playing host to two schools and yet not nearly as crowded as it should be.
She feels like an exposed nerve, too vulnerable for this. Her eyes burn with exhaustion and the threat of tears.
At some point she stops listening entirely, too mentally overwhelmed as she tries not to think about anything at all if it will get the ringing in her ears to stop. As she looks down at her hands, the shadows cast by the lines of her palms form a dark echo of the blood and grime she remembers from that day. She had to trim her nails as short as she could to get rid of the last traces of it.
When they’re finally dismissed, the end of the speeches coinciding with the end of the school day, Tina lingers behind at a shout of her name.
Waving over at her from through the dispersing crowd is Vicki. There are strained creases around the corners of her eyes as she weaves her way to meet Tina but she valiantly keeps a smile in place, something more than Tina can say for herself.
“You want to tag along with me? I’m heading to meet Samantha, she snuck some of her parents' booze in all the confusion so we’re going to meet up and let off some steam.”
“Samantha Stone?” Tina clarifies. “Since when do you hang around with Samantha?”
Vicki scoffs. “Since almost everyone else is gone.”
Tina presses her lips together to keep the sudden roll of nausea at that blasé statement at bay. Vicki seems to pick up on it, her expression dimming marginally with her concern, but she chooses not to question it. Instead, she strides on, head held high.
“Anyway, we all have people’s memories to drink to. I cannot deal with the aftermath of that stupid assembly while sober. So, you coming or what?”
Tina takes a steadying breath and follows. After all, it’s not like she’s got any better ideas. 
The crowd that gathers at the edge of the school’s field is a mishmash of different people, most of whom Tina has only ever seen around each other in the classroom or at her own parties. They seem to clump together uncertainly, stilted conversations offered between each other about inane topics that Tina doesn’t have the energy to entertain.
Regardless, she loiters around with the group, accepting whatever drinks get thrust into her hand and taking great gulps to avoid joining any conversations. Listening is more than enough, if you can even class what she’s doing as listening. 
Everyone else, at least, seems on the same page about getting shit-faced. As the hours creep by, shoulders finally start to slump and the group gets rowdier the drunker they get. Bottles are uncapped with grandiose claims of them being in honour of someone who couldn’t be there with them.
Silently, Tina raises her own drink, the faces of her friends flashing in her minds’ eye. 
At some point, Vicki leaves her place at Tina’s side. She looks up to see her, arms interlocked, with Samantha and laughing the way she only does when she’s really tipsy. For a second, Tina considers going over to talk to them, but when she gets up from her spot on the bench her body feels clumsy and uncoordinated. It’s probably better that she stays here, leaning against the seat for support.
There’s another kid who could probably benefit from the same. He’s pale aside from a splotchy flush to his cheeks as he stumbles ungainly out from the tree line.
“Didn’t get lost taking a piss then?” his friend taunts as he wobbles his way back over to their side.
“I think I just saw a ghost,” he says in a daze.
Everyone laughs at that. Tina tries not to think at all.
The sun is creeping towards the horizon and Tina is far too many drinks in when the nausea finally hits her. It feels like a physical thing, crawling its way up her throat.
“Shit,” she gasps, floundering up onto her feet at last and heading blindly into the trees. At least there she might have just a smidge more privacy in her shame.
Her sneakers shuffle over uneven earth, hesitant at first until the need to puke becomes too much and she hurries further along, with all the uncoordinated grace she can muster. Knees meet the ground and an arm braces against a tree as she sucks in deep breaths. They slowly soothe the sickness away. In the end, she’s not sure if it’s better or worse that she didn’t actually vomit.
Head still hazy, she looks up and widens her awareness back to her surroundings.
“You have got to be kidding me,” she says, clambering back to her feet, as she spots them.
It’s a girl. It’s too far away to be sure but she looks to be dressed in a cheer uniform, at least from what Tina can see. The girl is curled around herself, sitting with her back against a tree and her head in her hands.
This could be it. This could be that same hallucination. 
Tina should just go—whether or not this is real, she just needs to leave it alone. If this is just some other student from their drunken group, then her crying is none of Tina’s business. Hell, she’s had to step away for private moments herself and it’s not the sort of thing you want to be walked in on. And if this is Chrissy, then… Well, then that doesn't bode well to think about.
Leaves and twigs crunch underfoot, stealing any stealth she might have managed, as Tina approaches. Not like it matters, the girl doesn’t react at all, as if she can’t even hear her.
The closer she gets the less she can deny it. That strawberry-blonde hair, held back from her face by a green scrunchie; that small stature; the familiar cheer uniform, speckled with somehow still-red blood… She may not have known Chrissy personally, but Tina had certainly seen her around enough to be able to recognise her.
She slows to a stop, looking down at the figure of her. From here she can see that her head isn’t actually in her hands. She’s covering her ears, muttering something under her breath that Tina can’t quite make out without getting closer.
Tina’s mouth opens to speak but she finds it suddenly dry, her throat barren. She clears her throat, the sound perversely loud in the atmosphere around her.
“Chrissy?” she manages finally, voice little more than a whisper.
Chrissy’s head snaps up to look at her, eyes wide and frantic. Her whole body tenses, posture coiling and shifting as if she’s preparing to bolt, and for a moment Tina feels that same need to flee echoed in herself. Neither of them do.
Tearful, blue eyes take in Tina’s face before some of the fight seems to drain from her, slumping infinitesimally against the tree behind her. Tina, though, doesn’t relax and her alcohol slowed mind fumbles to come to grips with the sight before her.
Chrissy, where she sits in the leaves and dirt and forest debris, is so pale. Every so often, the very vision of her seems to flicker in Tina’s sight, as if the girl herself were not fully corporeal… trapped between this world and the next.
“Are… Are you real?” Chrissy breathes, voice small and broken.
The irony of that startles a laugh from Tina before she can help it. 
Shouldn’t she be the one asking that? Chrissy is the dead girl out of the two of them. If either of them should be mistrusting their minds right now, it should be Tina. Because if ghosts aren’t real, as Tina had always believed so strongly, then how can Tina be facing this right now?
“Am I real?” she scoffs, voice bordering on hysterical. “You’re the dead girl here.”
“What?” Chrissy asks in that same crushed tone.
“You’re dead,” Tina tells her, because what else is there to say?
Somehow, Chrissy seems to pale further, as if blood was rushing away from her non-existent face.
“No. N-no. I’m not, I can’t be. What are you talking about?”
“You died. In the Munsons’ trailer.”
“You’re lying. I’m right here—I can’t be—” Chrissy’s voice becomes shrill and stricken with panic before an anger steals over her features. “This isn’t funny. What kind of joke is that? I just—I need to get home.”
Tina scoffs, almost disbelieving, and steadies her swaying against a low-hanging branch.
“I went to your funeral. You’re dead. And I must be going crazy…”
The last part comes out half as a laugh, half as a sigh. It’s a fact she’s resigned herself to uncomfortably quickly, but what other explanation could there be? People don’t just see visions of dead girls sitting around and telling them they can’t be dead if they’re not mad.
Chrissy’s expression glazes over, seeming to be lost in her own mind as a fresh wave of tears give a new shine to those mournful eyes.
“You’re lying,” she says again, but this time she sounds more defeated than accusing, like it makes sense to her even if she doesn’t want it to be true.
Or Tina’s mind thinks Chrissy shouldn’t want it to be true—if Chrissy’s ghost actually was in front of her, that is. But she isn’t, because that would be preposterous. She’s just had too much to drink, and she’s been feeling paranoid, and it’s not as if she’s been able to rest since all of this began.
She doesn’t know why she’s indulging this in the first place. 
Her mouth opens to say something to that effect. Surely she has some smartass comment about it all, but all that remains in her mind are the wispy impressions of the thought as she tries her best to reorient herself. In the end, she gets nothing out before a voice calls out for her. 
Damn, she’s been out here for too long. She’s not even really sure how much time has slipped away without her notice between her leaving the gathering and ending up where she stands now.
Right, that decides it, she’s leaving. This—all of this—is something she doesn’t want any part in. Not ghosts, or hallucinations, or whatever any of this is and certainly not while she’s drunk. There are a thousand more important things she could be worrying about, she chides herself as she turns on her heel and sets her eyes on the way back. In fact, she’s mid-step when a feeble voice calls out for her.
“Please, don’t go. I’m scared to be alone…”
Tina pauses, her heart pounding.
“I need to get back,” she says; to herself, because there is no one else there. 
For a moment, Chrissy is quiet. Tina almost thinks the hallucination has finally dissipated when she speaks up again.
“Will you come back?”
Tina’s heart stutters in her chest. This isn’t real. None of this is real. She turns to look behind her and Chrissy is gone, not even a trace of her to be seen. 
“Tina!”
“Yeah,” Tina replies, the words mumbled to herself, as she finally unsticks her feet from the ground to return to the group. 
---
chapter 2
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ghosts-of-love · 11 months
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wish there was a Horrible Histories-esque show but for like. nature stuff
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youremyonlyhope · 4 months
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Wow, Eloise is so ahead of her time that she's reading Emma at least 6 months before it was even published.
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aceghosts · 6 months
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Rooney Shepard (They/Them): RELIC AU
There are stranger things I've learned on the outside Separated by an open door I find it hard to reach the end of my timeline Salivating 'cause I wanted more Is this the end or is this the beginning? -Too Close/Too Late by Spiritbox
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Tagging (Opt In/Out): @bbrocklesnar, @marivenah, @alexxmason, @captmactavish, @carlosoliveiraa, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @nightbloodbix, @voidika, @strangefable, @captastra, @amalkavian, @katsigian, @cassietrn, @g0dspeeed, @clicheantagonist, @cloudofbutterflies92, @direwombat, @onehornedbeast, @thedeadthree.
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