#because i hold these games to such a high standard i guess. and people can be BRUTAL about things they dont like which i think is part of

[stunfiskz]

i really love these games a lot but this fandom is so stressful to me

[webslingingslasher]

what’s peters body count?🫣

boyfriend!frat!peter 🤭

‘what’s your body count?’

peter freezes, he’s not opposed to the previous partners talk when it comes to being safe and healthy. but the number thing… he doesn’t see how it’s useful.

‘don’t worry, i have all the clean screenings.’ he tries to swerve around the question, you won’t let him. ‘no, i get that. we’ve talked about it before. but, how many people have you hooked up with?’

peter knows the frat boy stereotype, he may have even played into it for a little while. but he doesn’t want you to see him like that, he doesn’t want you to think of him as a womanizer or pig.

‘um,’ he wants to say a different number than the one in his head, he wants to preserve what you think of him. ‘does it matter?’

you tap your fingertips over his ribcage, ‘i guess not. i’m just curious.’ peter’s tracing circles around your shoulder, ‘cool.’

you wait, it seems like he took your response as an opportunity to stay silent. something about his hesitance makes you feel icky.

‘not gonna share?’ peter thought your answer meant the conversation was over, apparently not. ‘is there a reason you’re asking?’

you pat his skin, giving him a second notice before sitting up. ‘not really, but now you’re being all coy, i want to know.’

‘yeah, but i’m your boyfriend now. it shouldn’t matter.’ your eyebrows furrow. ‘it doesn’t. but hiding it makes it matter.’

‘i’m not hiding anything.’ except he is.

‘you are. i want to know. right now.’ peter’s looking off to the side, you can see through his invisible wall, he’s embarrassed. ‘peter, i’m not gonna judge you or anything. i’m just curious.’

‘you are. you totally are and i don’t want you to see me as different. i was a different person before i met you, and who i was before shouldn’t matter now.’

you nibble on your bottom lip, ‘it’s either really low or really high based on what you’re giving me.’ peter’s silent, you’re thinking it’s on the higher side.

‘more than ten?’

more silence. ‘more than fifteen?’

you don't know how high to go. ‘twenty five?’

‘lower, but not by much.’

you stare at him. peter stares back. he’s expecting you to drop your face and turn away, call him a manwhore and spit in his face. he’s not expecting the sweeping grin that takes place.

‘is that why you’re so good in bed? hefty experience?’

‘i wouldn’t know, you’re the only one i ever put effort into.’

you bat your eyes at him, a pout takes over while you try to calm the urge of attacking him with kisses. insecurity flushes over you, ‘were they... were they all just one night stands?' there it is, that's what peter was waiting for.

your actual name is said, drawn out like you were playing a dangerous game. 'it's just that, i mean, am i enough for you?' peter feels his chest tighten, if he could, he'd take back every night he ever spent with a girl that wasn't you.

'why would you ask me that?' you feel hidden in peter's arms, they're around you and there's a kiss on your forehead. 'of course you're enough for me. you're more than enough, you always have been.'

'i don't think i can compete with that many girls and-'

'you're not. there is no competition, and there never was.' you shake your head, 'liar. you were still hooking up with other girls when we started hooking up.'

you're a little shocked by peter's rough hold, you're staring up at him with wide eyes when he talks down to you. 'is that what you think? have you always thought that?'

it's not what you think, it's what you know. 'you said-' peter cuts you off, 'i said bullshit. i talked to other girls, maybe flirted a little, but i never had sex with anyone else. trust me, i wouldn't fuck up like that.'

peter was right, there was no competition. because you won first and only place the second you stepped foot into his bedroom. 'wait, does that make me the competition? like, if we break up i'm the standard for you?'

'i mean... yeah, i kind of love you a whole lot.' this time, you don't hold back on your attack of kisses. 'i made you change your rules. i win.'

peter disagrees. 'no, i won.'

[alterrune]

A RANT ABOUT THE NOZZLENOSE WEAPONS

I find it hilariously awful that directly after Grand Run, Nintendo decided to put the H-3 Nozzlenose as the FIRST WEAPON in the rotation roster for the new Salmon Run rotation...and then also put the L-3 Nozzlenose IN THE EXACT SAME SPOT for the one after that!

Now, I'm gonna go on a bit of a rant as to why I personaly think these weapons should be reworked ENTIRELY for Splatoon 4.

Every single weapon in Splatoon has one thing in common: You hold down the trigger, you can fire for as long as you have ink. It's consistent, it's great, and it makes it so you don't have to constantly tap the ZR button.

Guess what's missing from these two?

THEY. DON'T. AUTO. FIRE.

This ALONE honestly makes me want to never touch this weapon.

Personally, I think the whole concept of "constantly tapping the trigger" with this thing is incredibly stupid.

(This is just my opinion. If you use either [or both] of the Nozzlenose weapons and actually can use them really well, don't let me stop you, keep using them if you're comfy with them.)

If you ask me, the way to fix the Nozzlenose's problem without making it a full-on clone of another weapon is simple: Keep the way the weapon fires, but make it full-auto so players don't have to constantly hit the fire button. The "tap fire" thing on the Nozzlenose duo is not neccesary.

AND WE ALREADY HAVE A WEAPON THAT DOES THE WHOLE "TAP FIRE" THING, AND IT HAS A FULL AUTO MODE.

THE SQUEEZER. Tap the fire button once, you get a long-range, high-damage shot. Hold it down and you get a short-range, low-damage shot. I literally call this thing "the better Nozzlenose" because it actually has a full-auto mode, which every other weapon in the Splatoon series has.

-🔺💜🔵💕✍🏼-

Now, what about Salmon Run? That's why I made this post in the first place, after all.

Are the Nozzlenose weapons good there?

No. No it isn't. In fact, it's actually WORSE there, and I think a lot of people share my opinion on that.

In Salmon Run, there are salmonids EVERYWHERE. And not only do they come in the standard variety, there are also special event waves: Mothership, Grillers, Fog, Glowflies (called "Rush" in-game), Mudmouth Eruption, Goldie Seeking, Cohock Charge, Giant Tornado, and, of course, High/Low Tide.

A couple of those are no problem with ANY weapon, those being Mothership, Mudmouth Eruption, Giant Tornado, Goldie Seeking, Cohock Charge, Low Tide and Fog. Though it doesn't hurt to practice, as Salmon Run is known for being incredibly chaotic.

But the last 3 types, HOO boy.

The Grillers have a weak spot you need to hit, and if they have a lock on you (as shown by a red laser pointer line they aim at the player they're targeting), you need to run and gun or else you'll recieve what basically equates to a Salmonid Roller crush. And mind you, that weak spot is tiny, and the Griller constantly spins around. You see where I'm going with this? With the Nozzlenoses, you have to repeatedly tap the trigger button to hit that tiny-ass weak point. And mind you, you have to run AND shoot if they target you. Expect to see the "That's a wrap!" fail screen pretty darn quick if the last player alive in the Griller wave (either you or another player) has one of the Nozzlenoses.

Glowflies ("Rush") just sucks overall. One of the players will randomly get a bunch of glowflies following them. They aren't a helpful thing, though. It makes it so that every Salmonid on the map targets that one player. And with the Nozzlenoses, that's a guarenteed player down. You expect a weapon that has to be tap-fired to actually work well when you have about 100 enemy mooks (at BEST, mind you) all targeting you? Ehh, not saying it's impossible, bc there ARE people who use this weapon and are skilled with it, but it's HIGHLY unlikely.

High Tide is when the water surrounding the area (which, btw, INSTANTLY SPLATS YOU IF YOU TOUCH IT) raises up, limiting movement options. Even worse, it can be paired with other wave types to make things THAT much worse for you. The Nozzlenoses were not built for fighting in certain special waves, but throw in the High Tide event with it, and kiss that teammate (or you) goodbye. Expect to see a downed player you need to revive, unless, again, they're somewhat skilled with the weapon.

Oh, that's right! I forgot the whole revival system! See, in Salmon Run, you don't respawn the traditional way. In order to revive, one of your teammates has to hit the life ring you spawn back in on, and THEN you can fight again. Imagine if someone with either of the Nozzlenoses tried to revive you while fighting off something like a Steel Eel, all 3 shots fired by the Nozzlenose miss ANY player, and then they get splatted by said Steel Eel, causing you to lose the run in true bullshit fashion. Unfortunately, that's not exactly a hypothetical situation when it comes to the Nozzlenoses.

-🔺💜🔵💕✍🏼-

So what am I trying to say here? MAKE THE NOZZLENOSE WEAPONS FULL-AUTO. It would fix every single problem I have with the weapon!

That, and remove them from Splatoon 3's Salmon Run weapon roster. In my honest opinion, they should've never been added in the first place.

(Again, I have to repeat this bc people might get on my ass if I don't: I AM NOT SAYING YOU SHOULD DITCH THE WEAPON IF YOU'RE COOL WITH IT. IF YOU USE ANY OF THE NOZZLENOSE WEAPONS AND ARE COOL WITH IT, THEN YOU DO YOU. THESE ARE SIMPLY MY OPINIONS.)

That is all. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk about these godforsaken weapons. Goodbye.

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (PART EIGHT)

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 5.5 - 6 - 7 - 8

notes: i feel that this chapter is very underwhelming bc i wrote it at work 🫡 so sorry

y/ndevils00

liked by siegenthaler34, nicohischier, and 32,542 others

y/ndevils00 hi people! thank you for tuning into tonight’s (brief) postgame recap! this is a very sad night for my favorite boys, as we lost 6-1 to the winnipeg jets.

we had a meager three penalties tonight!

starting off with erik, who has banned me from making any more name puns (boring!). erik got a penalty for tripping, bringing him up to an astounding 47 penalty minutes this season!

next, i’d like to bring your attention to jack’s picture. nothing special, i just like it.

and then, of course, we have my boyfriend again; chewing on his glove like a rabid little chihuahua <3

the next penalty was from siegs at the very end of the 1st period for high sticking! i had dawson do my dirty work for me and give him a very stern talking to during intermission!

next up, we have hershey bar looking very displeased, and i can’t say i blame him!

we got a little over halfway through 3rd period before we got the final penalty from the newest swiss, timo for holding! he took a lesson from my very rude boyfriend and hid behind the stanchion. i very much did not like that.

however, our lone goal came with SECONDS left in the game, scored by the captain himself! who still looked very disappointed to say the least.

and lastly, bff number 1 says i should apologize to bff number 2 for dissing him last night 😒 so we have a picture of marinara and i’m supposed to tell him that i’m proud of him (i’m not sure what for though? he didn’t do anything 🤷‍���️)

tagged ehaula, jackhughes, siegenthaler34, nicohischier, tmeier96 and john.marino97

ehaula i know i asked you to stop but now it feels weird without the name puns

y/ndevils00 so….

ehaula so you can do the puns

y/ndevils00 OH THANK GOD! do you realize how hard it was to withhold from them?! it was torture!

ehaula it’s been one post

user18 i’ve become so used to the “haula” puns that i forgot who erik was for a second

siegenthaler34 i made my y/n post debut!

y/ndevils00 it could’ve been for a better reason…

nicohischier you weren’t even there but you still got 2 horrible photos of me

y/ndevils00 i have spies everywhere

nicohischier what does that even mean?

y/ndevils00 guess you’ll never know

jackhughes why?

y/ndevils00 why what? why do i praise you when you don’t appreciate it? i don’t know, you would think i would’ve learned by now

jackhughes no. why the 2nd picture? why do you like it? why call me a chihuahua?

y/ndevils00 i like it. your eyes are so pretty and blue. because you’re small and scrappy and chew on everything.

jackhughes i’m 5’11

y/ndevils00 sure you are honey

dougieham if you went just based off y/n’s posts and comments, i don’t think anyone would ever guess that her and marino are genuinely best friends

y/ndevils00 it’s called tough love <3

john.marino97 she’s evil

trevorzegras i’m forever grateful that i’m a duck so i’ll never be subjected to the torture you put these guys through

y/ndevils00 there’s always next trade szn 😈

trevorzegras the ducks would never trade me

y/ndevils00 i have friends in high places… watch your back zegras

tmeier96 hughesy told me to sit there before i went into the box. he didn’t tell me why but i guess now i know

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes do you not love me? do you not want to see me happy? this is why luke is my favorite

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 luke is your WHAT?

lhughes_06 @/y/ndevils00 i feel so special! thank you y/n/n!

john.marino97 i have multiple questions. starting with: why is DAWSON bff number 1? and i didn’t get a penalty so you could be proud of me for that???

y/ndevils00 i like him better. and that’s very true, however you didn’t get a goal or an assist either so….

dawson1417 translation: y/n holds you to a higher standard because she knows how well you play. she knows you can do better but she’s proud of you regardless.

john.marino97 @/dawson1417 well why doesn’t she say it like that? that’s kinda sweet!

y/ndevils00 emotions are for the weak

john.marino97 @/jackhughes i think your girlfriend is broken

jackhughes she just likes to seem tough on the internet. watch this 👀

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i love you so much sweet girl ❤️ i can’t wait to get home

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes i love you too, now come home!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 aww you miss me?

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes sure, but also you lost your game which means you lost the bet and you have to give LSH her bath <3

[worriedvision]

Okay so how about Albedo getting closer to reader in hopes of learning a bit more of romantic social interactions and ques. Once he's a little more confident he tells them truth. I'm excited to see the angst you can come up with 👀

This will have spoilers for the event currently going on in-game, gender neutral reader. Unhappy ending, Albedos quite cold here because of the nature of his actions. I also made him tell the truth through the reader overhearing a conversation... Forgot to remember Albedo was supposed to come to the reader to admit it oopsie

--

You're known to be lonely by many citizens of Mondstadt. It was known to you deep down, and the Windblume festival intensified your lonely feeling. Every year, you saw confessions as you would carry out your usual work.

This year was different.

Albedo had approached you, asking for you to walk with him. Usually, you'd think this was some sort of prank. However, you knew that Albedo wasn't exactly the most social person either. You figured it was worth a shot, doing this 'allowing someone to get close to you' thing with him. He was awkward at the start, something you found very relatable, and you formed a comfortable friendship.

He did, however, slowly start to make more moves. Nothing solidly romantic, but from Albedo it certainly suggested something more. Paying for your meals, walking with you when he could, talking to you more often than he would with anyone.

It felt nice, you were letting your walls down. You planned to make more moves, and you were walking by yourself as you thought of what he would like.

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Albedo?" You hear an unfamiliar voice ask, clearly not understanding something. "This isn't a normal thing to be doing."

"I say keep going." Another voice chimes in. "If you stop now, it will leave them high and dry if you ask me."

"This is all in the name of research..." Albedo states, you hiding behind a tree to listen in. What research was this about? Was this about you? Nothing was particularly interesting about you.

"I would recommend a bouquet of flowers." You hear the man with tall ears state, looking in your direction for a split second. "I'm sure they will appreciate it. However, I still think this is quite cruel on the person in question. Didn't you call them a non-consensual loner?"

Ouch, that did sound like a way of describing you.

"Well,_ has very low standards due to their lack of companionship. I figured that, given the bar, I would be able to find out more about this." Albedo explains.

The other man glances over, seeing you hiding behind a tree mortified that you heard your own name in that conversation.

"Surely you consider them a worthy lover, given the fact you're still talking to them fondly." The man states.

Albedo shakes his head, and he explains that he had no feelings for you. He was merely gauging your reaction and noting down anything that works.

"How about we talk over a meal about this?" Tighnari asks, giving you a sympathetic look before walking in the opposite direction from you, Albedo and Cyno following.

--

The next date Albedo takes you on, he gives you a bouquet of flowers. You can't help but glare at the flowers, tearing up.

"Do you like the flowers, my love?" Albedo asks. Clearly, this was an idea that was not his own. Looking into his eyes, you do not see the love you held for him.

"No, I don't." You respond.

"Oh, is it an allergy? Perhaps I can-"

"Let me guess... you can 'add this to your research notes on how romance works'? Or maybe 'try to find out what flowers I am not allergic to for the purpose of catering gifts to me'?" You state, louder than you expected to come out. People look over, surprised to hear all this.

"Please, my love. Keep your voice down." Albedo jests.

"No, I won't." You stand up, Albedo trying to hold you in his arms to soothe you. "I'm a human being. I heard your conversation with those two last night, they were suggesting ideas for you. You made it clear you do not hold any of these feelings, and I am embarassed that I stupidly let you in." You grit your teeth. "Jot that down in your notes, Albedo. Jot down that faking a relationship and giving someone a false sense of love is cruel and hurtful. Jot down the fact you chose specifically when everyone else has something happy going on to ruin my self-esteem further by faking your feelings."

You storm off, not daring to take a glance back as you go back home to wallow in your own self-pity.

[jadedbirch]

LISTEN UP, QUEERS! I have finished the Radiant King Duology by Shelley Parker-Chan! I actually recced the first book in this series before. This is a spoiler free review of the sequel, but it can also stand as a review for the entire duology.

Going into a sequel after the first book sets a high bar can be so nerve-wrecking! Will it be as good? Will it give me all the things I was hoping for? Will it rip out my heart and feed it to the author's dog? Will it give me Completion and Nirvana?

The answer to all these questions in the case of this sequel is a resounding YES!

Now, I've read some other reviews on Goodreads and they were like "It's too dark!" and "These people are horrible!" And all I've got to say to those reviewers is "Yes, and???" If you've read "She Who Became the Sun", you should realize by the end of that novel that this is a world where horrible things happen, where decent people are put in situations where they choose to do awful things, sometimes to innocent people, and that the best we can hope for our "heroes" is that they get what they want in the end, no matter the cost.

If you're looking for uncomplicated characters with cut and dry motivations who only do The Right Thing™, you should look elsewhere. If, however, you're like me, and you like your queer disasters human and messy, then by all means - READ ON.

The stakes are high and the emotions are exquisite here. After all, it's a game of chess where the winner takes the throne. The pace is brutal and the action never stops. At one point there's an absolutely INSANE naval battle that doesn't even take place at sea, and there are lady pirates involved. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Parker-Chan keeps you guessing until the final pages (even though you know from the beginning how it's going to end because of History™) and delivers an ending so sublime and so transcendent, that I ALMOST don't want to write that reincarnation AU fanfic I've been thinking about since the first novel. Almost.

Yes, there's violence - the author has freely listed all their triggering content here - but the novel doesn't revel in it the way Game of Thrones did. Yes, horrible things happen. Yes, your heart will be broken. Probably more than once if you're like me and love these absolute disaster characters. But trust in the skill of this genius author to make it all worth it in the end.

This duology is an instant classic and a must read for anyone who likes queer literature. Especially queer literature that doesn't hold their queers to ridiculously high moral standards but lets them be deeply human and deeply fucked up. They love, they hate, they struggle, they suffer, they win, they lose, but we all triumph for it in the end 🙏💕🙌

[ozimagines]

Ok so y’all have officially broken my brain. Now the Y/N character is a part of us all. So in this fic, we’re the new Oz GED teacher that McManus hired. We’re obviously very hot (like irl 😘) and our particular victim in this fanfic will be Chico, because god knows we all love that beautiful idiot.

Hot for Teacher ch.1

“Well, I think that about wraps up all of the standard interview questions.” McManus said, closing his files before him. You sit still and watch, nervous about this job interview. You’d wanted to work in Em City since its conception. It was something you really believed in; rehabilitation. A chance to be better than yourself.

“I guess I have one last question and we’ll give you all call about our verdict. Is that okay?”

“Absolutely.”

“Why Em City specifically?” He leans back in his chair, awaiting your response. You think for a second.

“Because they’re people. And I want to treat them like people. If people can’t change or be better, then what are any of us doing, right? You have to believe people can change. You have to or there’s nothing left.” You think it sounds a little lame and after school special-y but McManus is moved. He believed that too once, with his whole heart and more.

“Welcome to Emerald City, Y/N.”

🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝

You arrange your classroom perfectly. The desks are in a circular formation to allow open ended discussion. Your blackboard is cleaned and Welcome to Class is written on it in your best cursive. You even have a goddam. Fish-tank in the corner. Its perfect. You know it is.

You sit there for your first day of class. You wait. And wait. And wait. No one shows.

It’s disheartening to say the least. You’d had so many plans and so many fun exercises for them. You can’t lie, you were hurt. You knew these prisoners had no obligation towards you, but it still felt like a punch in the gut.

You gather up your belongings sadly, and make your way out of the class. It wasn’t until you smelled something that you stopped. It was exactly what you needed today.

🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚

“Fold.” Chico grimaced. Carlo tried his best to hide the smile on his face, but he was wiping the floor with Guerra in their game of Hold ‘Em, and he let it show for a second. Chico noticed.

“Fuck you, mama’s boy.” He growled but Carlo took no offense, he just laughed. Chico was always a sore loser. They were in one of the side rooms. Study pods McManus called them, but Chico, Carlo, Carlos, and Jorge were using it to get high. Carlos’ friend scored some flower in unit B, and was able to move ten grams of that sweet skunky goodness for them today. It wasn’t heroin by any means, but that mellow high just cooled Chico’s fiery brain.

Carlos passed him the roach. Chico took a strong hit, closing his eyes afterwards and releasing the smoke from his lips like an ooze.

Suddenly the door to the pod creaked open, and the boys let out a series of curses. They could dispose of the weed no problem, but they’d been hotboxing the pod for the past hour. Carlo looked guilty immediately while trying not to. Jorge and Chico both blew their smoke away and looked nonchalant. Carlos got into a fighting stance.

When you entered, they were simultaneously relieved it wasn’t Metzger or Howell or Lopresti, but you were still a hack in their eyes.

“Evening, officer.” Chico chided, having established himself as top dog in the group.

“Hi, gentlemen.” You greet them sheepishly and take a few steps in. They stiffen. You notice. “Couldn’t help but notice you didn’t come to class today. I think you might really-��

“Save it, toots. We’re not coming.” Carlos answered sharply, taking a step towards you. You give a sheepish smile and nod.

“Okay. That’s fair. Look,” you check over your shoulder that Murphy or McManus are nowhere around. “I can smell everything from outside and I know you’re holding.”

Carlos took another menacing step forward and Chico narrowed his eyes. You had to tread carefully.

“Prove-“ Jorge begins to say before you cut him off.

“I’m not gonna report you. I’ve had a bad day and I’d like a hit or two.” You answer honestly and the guys exchange looks of wild confusion. “In return, I have some perfume/cologne that could help you guys not get caught.”

All three men looked at Chico for a verdict. This was fuckin wild. A hack wanting to share drugs? And not a crooked one from what they could glean. Chico studied you for a second, really taking you in. He’d been attracted to you immediately, but he had a rule against bedding the hacks. This, however was interesting. He looked deeply at you; not sensing a single dishonesty in your eyes.

“Es tu decisión, hermano.” Carlos remarked at him.

(Your call, brother.)

Chico was absolutely tantalized. He risked everything, unsheathing the rest of the spliff they just made, lit the end in his mouth for you, and handed it over, eyes wild and daring you to take it. You do, easily. You just wanted to forget today. You take a hit and feel the calm rush over you almost immediately. You sigh calmly.

“May I sit down?” You ask, politely. The guys seem confused but Jorge slides a chair over to you at Chico’s look of approval. You take another hit, really letting this one marinate in your brain. Chico smiled against his better judgement. Sharing is caring, after all. “How’s your sister’s new job, Carlo?”

Carlo was surprised you’d even known about that but he responded that she was doing well and still visited him once a month when she could. You nod and tell him that’s good.

“I’d just like to ask -damn, that’s some good shit- I’d like to ask something and then I’ll drop the subject entirely.” You pass the spliff to Chico, and he accepts it graciously. “Is there anything, anything at all that would make you guys come to class? I don’t mind making changes to make it more enjoyable.”

“You could teach it naked.” Carlos suggested meanly, hoping to frighten you. It didn’t work. You just smiled a little and giggled, mind working all the way.

“Would you come to class if I did?” You ask honestly, still smiling that goofy smile of yours. Chico barked a laugh. You had balls, he’d give you that.

“Would you?” Jorge asked incredulously. You shake your head.

“I’d never get it approved.” You laugh, trying to imagine the look on McManus’ face when you pitched that idea. “But I refuse to believe there isn’t a compromise to be made here. Just let me think on it, okay? Just let me think.”

“You do that, chula/o/x.” Chico remarked, smirking unkindly at you. You stare at him, taking him all in. He was handsome in that 90s cholo way. Suave. Kinda goofy too; you’d seen him causing trouble around Em City. You’d read his file. The file didn’t mention how nice his eyes were though. How deep and intense and full of fire and sound and music. You smile, kindly, and his smirk disappears.

“What’s your favorite color, brown eyes?”

“Red.” He answered, quickly, not being able to wait for the reveal of what you had planned. You didn’t reveal it though. You just nodded, and smiled through the fog of smoke. It was Chico’s turn to take you in. He seemed to be looking straight through you. You didn’t make sense. You were kind and nonjudgmental but still a hack. You smoked weed, joked about going to class naked, and showed four criminals nothing but respect since you’d entered. It wasn’t the reception he’d often gotten.

You stand after a second and teeter. Chico holds a hand outward to steady you, but fuck if he knows why.

“If I can make a compromise will the four of you try to come to class?”

“Not a-“ Carlos started.

“Sure.” Chico answered, grinning a little Mona Lisa smile. Fuck him, he was intrigued. Deeply. You smile directly at him for a little too long. It made him uncomfortable how long you stared at him.

“Till tomorrow, gentlemen.” You go to leave and tap Carlo on his shoulder.

“Try to get pictures of the baby, I’d love to see them.”

Carlo nodded in affirmation, touched that you had made the effort to know him at all. You exit the pod, and the guys are silent for a second, just sitting and thinking. After a moment, Carlos spoke up.

“Yo… what the fuck was that?!”

Chico dissolved into hearty high laughter.

🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝🌚🌝

The next day, the Latinos were gathered at a table, playing cards and discussing business. The guys were filling in Hernandez and Morales (they both exist here, shut up, the fact they didn’t have ONE scene together is CRIMINAL) about the events of the day prior.

“Wild shit.” Chico remarked after the story, still trying to figure out why you’d asked his favorite color.

“And he/she/they didn’t confiscate anything?”

“No.”

“Didn’t report anything?”

“We’ve yet to receive any punishment.”

“Didn’t-“

“No, no, it was all normal and weird at the same time.”

Some whistling was heard behind them, some cheers and whoops as well. The Latinos turned their heads to look, and what Chico saw almost stopped his heart.

You were standing there, dressed in a bright red satin dress/suit (idk what you feel more comfy in), tailored to your specific measurements. Sparkly pumps/dress shoes were seen under the hem. Your face was immaculate, your body even more so. You saunter up to them, a sly smile on your face.

“Well, gentlemen. How did I do?”

They were silent for a moment, checking the others’ faces to see if they were, in fact, seeing what the others were seeing.

“Just fine.” Chico breathed. “Just fine.”

You smile, staring at him like you two are the only people in the world. The guys pick up on that.

“Will you remember our deal-“

“We’ll be there.” Chico agreed, much to Carlos’ chagrin.

You turn away and walk to class, getting catcalled all the way. Chico stares but doesn’t say a word. He’s not thrilled about the idea of going to class, but seeing you shake your little ass while bending over your desk… this he’s got to see.

[astrologista]

the things that bruce has in common with four of his kids are

when it comes to dick, it’s understanding. they both understand what it’s like to see both of your parents killed in front of you at a young age, and others can certainly relate to that pain, but between bruce and dick it’s a bond and an understanding. bruce and dick are the MOST likely to not only defend each other on their crazy shenanigans but also to call each other out. they know by now that they are each the best judges of each others’ character. they understand when and why they do certain things out of pain when others may not understand it as clearly. and bruce always gives a heavy weight to dick’s criticisms of his character - case in point, when dick was yelling at him about jason? bruce didn’t just shut down, he fired back, because he knew dick was right. they understand each other much more and on a different and deeper level as partners than any of bruce’s other sidekicks. it’s a different thing

when it comes to jason, it’s determination. when bruce or jason set their mind to something, they can become extremely set on their goal and nothing can persuade them otherwise. bruce and jason share this quality very distinctly. this tunnel vision can on occasion cause them to go overboard, but it is also this quality that leads them to a very high success rate in achieving what they set out to achieve when pursuing the very high standards and goals that they set out for themselves, often holding themselves to moral and big-picture methods like improving gotham and eradicating crime completely.

when it comes to tim, it’s a very particular thing. i found it hard to put my finger on it. tim can be the opposite of jason in planning because tim is very easily willing and able to switch strategies during the chess game. this is not to say that jason never improvises, he does. but tim is much more... dynamic and flexible in where he allows his loyalties to lie. tim is more willing to “cheat” so to speak, even though he never truly “compromises”. he will work with the league of assassins. he will do things that nobody else would do. bruce and tim have a very distinct “trust” and understanding between each other that is different than that between bruce and dick. it’s something like, if the world were falling apart and the multiverse was coming apart at the seams, it would be bruce and tim who would come together at the very end of everything to save it because they are the only two people insane enough to think of what to do. and it’s funny, because generally they DON’T trust each other. they do and they don’t. they disagree and they agree. i guess bruce and tim are the most likely to think way, way, way outside of the box and then tell each other, “yep, that sounds just crazy enough to work” and then fully believe in the other all the way and then it works because they’re both brilliant. and when they work in tandem, forget it. you will lose every time

when it comes to damian, i think it’s... vulnerability. bruce and damian both play their cards very close to the chest, more so than any other members of the batfam. tim is not forthcoming with his true emotions in any way shape or form, but he generally lies strategically. damian lies because revealing his own vulnerability is acutely painful. revealing how much he cares about others is something that stirs his soul and frightens him. he doesn’t want to let on that he feels this way and i think bruce understands that perfectly and that’s why he’s very protective of damian’s feelings. they both understand what it means to have your walls up and why those walls need to be up and they can both sit together in silence for a long time and not feel uncomfortable now. they have an understanding between each other that the right time will come and until then, they are going to use snark to communicate.

disclaimer these are not all things that i think each batkid has some kind of exclusive hold on but rather that which i think makes each bond sort of unique in the most obvious way for each of them. like i’m trying to get to the essence of these to see why each mentorship “feels” different

[pyropsychiccollector]

Wanna know about Hinanami, Hinazumi & HiNatsumi Fankids... How many are there?

I'll preface these by saying that I'm not going to number how many kids each girl has with Hajime. :P It's not out of laziness - honestly, I just like how Vergil does it in leaving the "numbers" up to the imagination. Plus, people have their own ideas about how many kids Makoto or Hajime would or should have, so in a way, this method can make quite a few people happy.

... Well, unless you think (ex., Hinanami) should have just one kid, and I give them multiple kids... Then you're outta luck. But, I'll try to think these through.

I'mma weak man. These kids will be heavily based off characters from other series - gives me the chance to "show them off" since I don't have sprites. I'll rattle off two of Hinanami's kids. Again, there could be more, but I'll leave that up to the imagination for now.

I went with Mari for this first one. Mari Hinata~... Mari means "truth; reason". I'm sure you all know about the "That's Wrong!" memes from Goodbye Despair, and truth/reason is pretty important for Hajime and Chiaki both. :3 Her hair color probably takes after her mom's, but Mari grows her hair out more like this. She's got her dad's face and/or his eyes. Her smiles are some combination of her parents' smiles. Mari's a bright, mature young girl that studies and practices hard, but also likes having fun with her friends and especially her little brother. ... Oh, she loves little brother. Very, very much. (❋•‿•❋) Mari enjoys hosting picnics with her brother and friends, and while she's open to taking part in video game multiplayer tournaments whenever their friends get into it, she's not an avid gamer like her mother. Aside from the occasional pranks, she normally has more mature tastes and hobbies. I guess you could say she inherited Hajime's determination and tenacity, but Chiaki's... concept of "natural talent". As such, she's a bit of a perfectionist. Hajime and Chiaki don't hold her to standards like that, they'd rather Mari just be happy - but Mari really wants to make her family proud, bring home only the very best grades, be the best in sports, play perfectly in music, bake the very best cookies, etc... Usually she can keep a lid on her emotions and not go too crazy with her perfectionism, but Mari is pretty passionate about it. After all, she's not making the effort for herself, she's doing it for her loved ones, to give them the best experience in everything~ She's a hard little worker, yes she is~ (❋•‿•❋)

This next one (Sunny, in Omori canon) is Mari's little brother. Nikko, which means "sunshine." His hair color is more like his dad's, and he's got softer facial features like his mother, and perhaps her eyes, too. Nikko definitely inherited the more reserved parts of Hajime and Chiaki's personalities - he doesn't have much energy, gets tuckered out easily, but he's got a vivid imagination. He loves to draw, read manga, play video games, and hang out with his friends and especially his big sister. Unfortunately, he inherited a lot of Hajime's self-esteem issues. Basically, he struggles with a lot of things and has a tendency to give up if he becomes too dissatisfied; also, he compares himself with others too much, and has a habit of putting Mari up on this pedestal that he'll never reach. As they get older and Mari starts prepping for college in high school, Nikko really starts missing her company, and that's why he takes up the violin... so that he can hopefully spend time with her in duet practice, but Mari being who she is and holding him to the same grueling standards as her... the practice does put a strain on their relationship.

Hinazumi probably has at least a couple kids like Hinanami, but for right now I'll name just the one. :P

This boy's name is Takato (Omori canon name: Hero). Mahiru and Hajime went for that name because the Kanji used means "treasure" or "precious thing." Takato definitely takes after his dad in his hair, his face, and his height. Though he does have his mom's eyes. Kinda like Mari, Takato is a mature kid that excels because he works and practices hard. Because some of his friends and half-siblings are reckless, he's developed a knack for First-Aid and taking care of others... though his main passion resides in cooking. Together, he and Mari are kinda like the stand-in parents for the siblings and half-siblings whenever the adults aren't around. There's been lots of good times, but there's also been a fair amount of fights and coverups (like when something gets broken in the house). Takato is often the mediator (or tries to be) while Mari is the "inspiration", or the leader that brings everyone together.

Similar to Hinazumi above, I'm gonna just list the one kid for now. There are probably a couple kids for Hinazuryu, though.

This girl's name is Izumi (Omori canon name: Aubrey), which means "spring" or "fountain." Natsumi felt like going for that name out of sentimentality for the place she, Hajime, and Chiaki used to meet up to play video games at Hope's Peak. Izumi's hair color is more like her dad's, grows it out longer than Natsumi's, but she takes after her mom a lot more in face, eyes, and attitude. Izumi's not a yakuza or anything, but she is a tough girl that doesn't take crap from others~ But she also has a vulnerable side, and confides in Nikko a lot while sitting on swings. Izumi's favorite possession is her baseball bat, which she uses for more than just softball; though she also has a fondness for stuffed animals and... bunnies. ... Yes, she has a pet bunny named "Bun-Bun." Don't you judge her! (❋•‿•❋) Izumi's protective of her family and friends, though she does take it personally if you hurt her, emotionally or otherwise. She's not the sharpest tool in the shed on the academic side of things, but that's okay. To her, there's more important stuff than school stuff - although she does idolize Mari a lot because of how smart and kind she is. (❋•‿•❋)

[alpharaposa]

The thing is? Everybody starts out poor when they leave home (unless they get a shitload of money from their parents, which is fewer people than you think).

The GI Generation did not go straight from school into neat little “pleasant valley” houses. They fought a freakin’ war first, then half of them went to college on the GI Bill, and THEN they finally settled down to start making Baby Boomers.

Baby Boomers? A bunch went to college, a bunch went to Vietnam, and a bunch bummed around getting high without really living anywhere until they finally settled down (or died off) and started getting real jobs.

Gen X? We got soooo many thinkpieces about hanging around living with our parents because we didn’t have the scratch to move out (which is historically normal, BTW- people lived with their parents and sometimes their grandparents). Those who did had the time-honored tradition of living with roommates for the first place or two, with all the awkward steps of living with people who may not have the same hygiene standards you do. Or may feel like vodka and sunny delight is a perfectly good breakfast and trash belongs on the floor.

So, Millennials weren’t setting any new trends by having trouble paying rent and getting a car (if they even wanted one) as young adults freshly on their own. And you up and coming kids, you’re going to have to figure out some strategies, too. Roommates, living with your parents, going into debt and learning about bankruptcy... those are all normal things for twenty-somethings.

For most of our country’s existence, the big worries were child poverty and elderly poverty. Guess what? We’ve just about licked those. Kids and their parents get a lot of help, and the lone grandma out there is usually richer than her kids. Even if not, she’s got the kinds of retirement funds previous generations could only dream of.

That leaves the last form of ‘poor’, which is the young adult with almost nothing to their name, setting out to make their way in the world for the first time. Most of them are going to struggle. Some take out student loans and get through college and THEN reality hits them, but unless you were a very strange student who had a part-time job and saved a lot of money, you don’t have much of anything when you turn 18/21/24.

It takes time to accumulate wealth, be it in ‘real’ form (houses and other property) or simple cash. It’s never been easy, and the rules change as society changes. The internet and global supply chains changed things in just the last generation. COVID screwed up so much, it’s unreal, and we’re still sorting that out. I’m sorry for those of you hitting the job market right as things hit the skids- that sucks. It’s happened to my mom every time she went job hunting so far (and she’s in her 60s- sometimes it just works out that way).

Is it hard sometimes? Boy howdy. Make some friends to hang out with on the cheap, be it drinking country time lemonade and vodka instead of going to the bars or picking up hobbies less expensive than playing the latest video games.

What you’re going through is what other people go through and HAVE gone through for years and years and years. It gets easier. You’re going to have pitfalls where you screw up. Maybe you’ll have to start over once or twice. God knows my husband and I did a couple of times. Things you never learned about in school will suddenly become important, like credit ratings. The good news is that information on how to fix this stuff isn’t too hard to find these days. The bad news is that you’re going to have to do a lot of stuff that’s new or uncomfortable until you learn the ins and outs.

You’ll manage. You’ll get better at it. There are some things you’ll let go and other things you’ll hold onto. Life isn’t about having it all, it’s about learning what really matters and what you can live without. It’s about the choices you make along the way. Make those choices in a way so you can look yourself in the mirror afterwards.

Don’t set yourself up for failure by assuming it’s supposed to be easy. We’d all like it to be easy, but nobody’s figured out the magic formula to actually make it work out that way. Believe me, people have tried.

Don’t pay for job placement- good places charge the companies they head-hunt for, not you.

Libraries have programs to help you write resumes and learn to budget.

Step outside and appreciate nature a little bit- it’s free of charge and it’ll keep you sane.

[particular-one]

Hi ☺️ can i pls get a match up for twst, genshin and haikyuu?

Hmm...for name, I'll go with 🐰 anon! I'll probably write to you from now using this emoji so be prepared for it hehe

she/her, prefers male results and my mbti is ✨️enfp✨️ (but you probs already guess that LOL)

Hmmm, im a bit shy at first (i got that typical rbf + im super tall so everyone is scared of me at first!) But once i warm up, im really just a big puppy hehe, super affectionate and loving, very caring and of course well mannered. I have a high standard for myself, and while i baby others, im really harsh with myself 😅 i try to get along well with everybody i meet but if i cant then ill just ignore them. If i tease someone then it's out of love hahaha. (Enemies to lovers who 👀 jkjk lol) I'm mature but sometimes a little playful when the mood allows for it but i definitely know when to be serious. Oh man, i really did ramble about myself hahaha, i hope you made it through that 😂

Hobbies: i like anything! My friends always call me up to hang out and i never say no. If theres something i really love though.....eating? Hahaha

In a romantic partner: loyalty!!!!!! I don't want to play guessing games on if they love me or not (omg suffering bc this prob eliminates all my problematic pretty faves LMAO). A little cat and mouse game is okay but at the end of the day, i give my whole heart to my lover so i want to trust that they'll take care of it without hurting me. I'm a biiiiit of an overthinker (read:runner) so someone who can hold it down for me when my ass starts acting up would be ideal. Im always taking care of others so i want someone who can dote on me! (Ummm say you want the princess treatment without saying you want the princess treatment much?? LOL) I'm also a big people pleaser and a pushover so someone who can remind me to not overwork myself, and maybe help put my foot down or stand up for me when im having trouble doing so would be really really....really nice 👉👈

Love languages: I'd like to receive acts of service! And as for giving.....i give all 😭 my leo placements make me treat my lover like royalty! I do want the princess treatment but it's only because I treat my man like a king 😤 (i hope that connotation wasn't overly suggestive, i promise that wasnt my intention hahaha) as for deal breakers: lying and cheating- that is a NO!!!

Thank you for reading this whole thing and thank you for doing this💕❣️

-your brand new 🐰 anon hehe

hello 🐰 anon!! thanks for being the first matchup request <3 and i look forward to doing more future requests for you! hope you like your matchups! :]

TWISTED WONDERLAND ---- MALLEUS DRACONIA

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ malleus is used to being the only being that everyone in nrc is scared of, so seeing that you experience the same thing when meeting new people oddly puts him at ease that he isn't alone. though it took a while before the both of you would start conversing because malleus is unsure on how to approach you without scaring you like all the others, he really cherishes your relationship with him. he enjoys conversing with you, especially since your caring and affectionate attitude makes him feel a little less lonely. he also gets flustered when you tease him, unsure how else to respond! as a partner, malleus is very loyal to you. though it majorly stems from the fact that he does not like being left alone, he will sometimes follow you around silently as you do your activities, constantly checking up on you if you're alright. he also likes to impress you so he does his best to cook your favorite food, since you like eating! it's only a good thing he didn't enlist lilia's help for this. when he sees you burdening yourself again with even more work late at night, he stays up with you as company. there are even times where he offers to help you with it - if there was something he could do to help, he would jump on it so that he could see you just a tad bit more relaxed. malleus sometimes brings you out on late night walks when you're getting stressed with your work for some fresh air and relax for a bit with him.

GENSHIN IMPACT ---- THOMA

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ thoma is the classic golden retriever, and your personality perfectly parallels with his! hence, he really likes spending time with you - at least, with the free time that he has. he's also big on compliments, so expect tons of praise from thoma! he's helped around with a bunch of tasks and activities with you by his side, so he knows exactly how you work, and admires just how hard you work. he wants to be just like that, if he were being honest. when the both of you are working on something together, you're honestly unstoppable - like ... literally. none of you would probably halt on working until you get things done, which just shows how well you work with one another. as a partner, thoma is, as mentioned, exactly like a golden retriever. he would drop anything he's doing to help you out when he can, and he even would go to lengths to make sure you're as happy as possible! he notices just how much you help others and constantly reminds you that you can rely on him (like a rock) if you needed anything. thoma is honestly a really romantic guy and likes to surprise you by pulling out all the stops (via his connections) to create surprises for you, like a quick dinner date that he cooked up! he's at his happiest when he sees you happily eating the food he cooked for you, he's sappy like that. oh! and he also brings you flowers and bought small items that reminded him of you.

HAIKYUU!! ---- OIKAWA TOORU

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ oikawa was rather an unorthodox choice, considering how your personalities, at first glance, might clash. he wouldn't admit it, but oikawa was genuinely scared when he met you for the first time, your consistent rbf and height being plausible factors why. still, he was drawn to how you constantly helped everyone around you, and to his intrigue, he actually found some similarities between the both of you! the both of you get into teasing matches with no clear winner. though he did not get into a relationship with you immediately (read: oikawa was way too stubborn and in denial), he wouldn't trade it for the world. as a partner, oikawa might seem like the type who would flaunt you simply in public, but he praises you a lot in private too. though he has a lot of female fans, rest assured oikawa only has his eyes for you. he's also your biggest defender and would get into arguments with others just to make sure you're alright. he can be pretty straight with you too, so if he sees that you aren't taking care of yourself, he'd be the one to take matters in his own hands and find a way to get you to stop overworking. as ironic as that may be considering he overworks as well, but you also get him to stop constantly overworking so it's a balance! oikawa never forgets to get you your favorite snack - even if it's late after practice.

[redwineconversation]

Wendie Renard RMC Sport Interview (February 26, 2023)

Serious sidenote before I start: I genuinely don't think that people understand the depth of the loyalty Lyon players have for each other. I said once that you shouldn't like a team because of representation or accessibility but because of the moral values they hold. "Is this a team you'd want your friend to be around," I argued.

You can argue a lot of things about Lyon players. But I think their sense of moral integrity in the purest sense of the term is what allowed them to be so dominant for all these years. Representation and accessibility shouldn't determine a team's moral character. In my eyes, at least. I guess everyone has their own definition of what morality should mean to them.

Anyway, blah blah standards disclaimers apply. @OL Comms Dept please pay me, my car insurance went up because I had one seizure back in August and everyone and their mother Geico is holding that over my head; Apollo's board went up; and I like soy milk. Pls just love me. Also not affiliated with RMC Sport in any way, blah blah y'all know the speech.

WENDIE RENARD RMC SPORT INTERVIEW

"IT'S BECAUSE I LOVE THIS JERSEY THAT I MADE THIS DECISION": WENDIE RENARD EXPLAINS STEPPING BACK FROM THE FRENCH NATIONAL TEAM

The event - 48 hours after her announcement that she is stepping back from the French National team, captain Wendie Renard explains exclusively to RMC Sport the reasons for her decision. An interview which lasted more than half an hour where no subject was off limits, and during the defender with 142 caps was strongly animated over one particular conviction: advance women's football in France.

Wendie Renard, what pushed to make this decision to step back from the French National Team?

It was a decision I had been contemplating for a while, even after the Euros. Taking into consideration the games, the situation, the meeting I had with the coach, I took this decision to step back. I always told in life if something bothers you then walk away, this situation was bothering me. I tried to change certain things so we could perform better individually and collectively, and that wasn't taken well. I don't need to have a big ego, I have enough experience at my age. So I decide to write that message with all my heart. I received a significant number of supportive messages, where people were telling me how brave it was. But for me it wasn't even brave, it was just an accumulation of things up to today. Continuing under those conditions, it's just not possible.

When say you "tried to change things", what are you referring to?

We had some talks with the coach during the last camp. Now I've always said it, she's the boss, not me. I'm not looking to be the coach, I'm just looking to perform well, to elevate this blue jersey to the level it deserves to be at, which is the highest level with the players and talent that we have. I think we should be capable to do much better, that's my opinion. If others agree with it or not, that's a different story. When you're on the French National Team, you have to be at the highest level. The highest level, it's when you're playing against world class players. You have to be demanding in everything that you do, you have to perform well in everything you do. I'm not perfect, I've made mistake, both on the field and off of it. When you're wearing this jersey, you have rights and you have a lot of responsibility individually, there's a lot of things which need to be changed if you ask me, you have to understand that. I'm not against it but rather for it, so that there is change.

In your statement, you allege that you couldn't "continue in a system far below the required expectations for the highest level": what is the system in place for the French National Team?  When we talk about the high level, those who play professional sports know what I am talking about. For the general public, it's perhaps a bit harder to understand. The coach and staff have been there for several years, and we tried to advance with certain things. The system should simply be professional. But there's such an indifference, compared to Division 1, where we've been asking for things for years. We need to advance. In our clubs when we talk with the foreign players, yeah they sometimes have problems with their national team or with their federation, but I feel that for us [the French] women or professional athletes, it's just complicated. We always, always have to fight, or else we get into difficult situations on an individual level. Today it's personal. I can't take it anymore. I can't fake it.

I love this jersey, and because I love it, I made this decision even it hurts me personally. But I hope that it will help those now and in the future to make the right decisions, to honor this jersey the way it deserves. If I return to the National Team or not, I don't give a shit. The problem is that with this French National Team jersey, the moment I wear it, I have to respect, I've always respected it, always defended it. But we owe it to ourselves, individually and collective, the Federation as well, to give it the respect it deserves. For there were certain decisions which were made ... We dropped the ball after the 2019 World Cup, a gap was formed. Afterwards, at Angers, it's was super during the Tournament, I'm very thankful to the public. But in a general manner for clubs, we have a lot of difficulty. When you see that Barcelona is selling out their stadium with 90,000 people, England is following as well... We had a step up over those countries. I eat, sleep, breathe football. I ask myself: how is it that we were ahead and today we're behind, it's because we dropped the ball! In a general manner, we have to shift into a higher gear if we want to win a title with the French National Team.

When did you make this decision? To be honest ... 2023, I didn't want to play for the French National Team. It was something I had been contemplating for a while. I asked for a meeting with the coach so we could discuss and exchange ideas. But it took some time. Before the draw for the World Cup, she called me, we discussed seeing each other outside of a national team camp so we could move things forward. Unfortunately it took a while to fall into place. Finally this meeting ended up taking place during the last camp. I had already made up my mind about 80% when it came to this decision. There's always going to be a part of you that hesitates, and you hope things will change. I will give everything for this jersey until I die. You lose lots and lots of energy over futile things, which for me are clear to me, but maybe not for everybody because we don't all think the same, thankfully.

Was this last meeting the tipping point?

Before this camp, I knew it was going to be the last one, that I needed to savor wearing this jersey, the teammates. I think I did things right. I first talked about it to my [club] president Jean-Michel Aulas, and he told me to discuss it with the FFF [French Federation] president. I met with [Phillippe] Diallo [Vice President at the French Federation]. Before meeting with him, I called the [FFF] president Le Graët to tell him I was going to meet with Diallo, and that I was going to step back from the French National Team. After I met with the coach, who I was supposed to meet with before Diallo, but that meeting was canceled. So we saw each other during the camp, we talked about the changes, but I didn't want to inform her I was stepping away simply because I just wanted to finish the camp well.

In a general manner, the Federation doesn't put things in place for the French National Team? We're lacking in that area. I'm speaking purely in sporting terms and the quality necessary to evolve. High level athletes will understand what I am talking about, I can't give more details than that today. Some elements will speak for themselves and others not. Our daily routine it's on the field: the performance, competence, work to better yourself, build something together. I've put the collective above all else in my career because I play a team sport, otherwise I would be play an individual sport. That doesn't necessarily mean that we will win, but you have to put everything together to give yourself a chance. Even with clubs it can be complicated. My message is clear. There are things to do at the elite level, and I think we are dropping the ball on certain things. We have to step up a gear, I can't keep doing that by myself.

The staff is below par? It's not up to me to say those sort of things, that's not my style. it's up to the Federation to take responsibility. I took responsibility today as a player. We're a group, maybe not all the players will share my views, but for me personally, when you want to reach the top level, you have to meet the expectations required, and work towards achieving those expectations. I'm just saying that everyone has to take responsibility [for their actions]. Me, I couldn't take it. If they want to listen to what I said, all the better. I'm just saying I couldn't take it anymore, I think that's something to be respected. You talked about meetings with Jean-Michel Aulas, Noël Le Graët, Philippe Diallo: did you have their support?

I'm not going to go into detail about our meetings. My goal was to give them a heads up on my personal decision was to stop [playing for France], and why that happened. Even if they didn't understand, especially for Philip Diallo, they supported me. On the field at Angers, he came up to me and said "I hope this isn't the last time [you play for France]", "I warned you this would be my last game." I felt there was a lot of confusion and incomprehension as to why I was stepping back.

How would you respond to the people saying it's just a coup?

People can say what they want, but they're not experiencing this situation. I've also heard "you play football, you're on the French National Team...". Yeah okay. But when you have that emblem on your chest and as of the moment where you're involved in a relationship [with the team], there's going to be hurt when you're disappointed. It's true for all aspects in life: work, human relations. I'm not trying to convince anyone, I'm convinced enough for myself that I couldn't take it anymore. I'm not 20 years old anymore, I'm at an age where I need to feel good [mentally] to continue to perform like I want to. You can try to hide what you want but your body will sell you out. And if you start accumulating injures, then they're going to say "she's 32 years old, she's old, she's off to retirement" but no that's not the problem.

Is the management with the French National Team still a problem?  Management is a simple word but it encompasses a lot of things. On that note, I recognize that the coach made some efforts on certain things. But today, we owe it to ourselves as athletes, I'm putting an emphasis on that, we need to come on to something else, move the needle for expectations, for everything, so that we can perform better and win a title. When you watch the American National Team train, how do you think they train? And yet there are problems within the team. When they won the World Cup in 2019, some players weren't speaking to each other. Some players couldn't stand each other, got into it with the coach and yet they still won. In a meeting, it's not yes to everything and no to everything. I try to understand. Afterwards I can make mistakes, and it could come out that I'm the problem and I said enough.

Did you take a risk that you might never wear the French National Team jersey again?

I'm aware of that and it's not a big deal. But maybe my stance will help things advance, or not. I wore that jersey 142 times, I'm proud of it, I met some wonderful people at camp, be it staff members or teammates. That's life, it's like that sometimes. Only God knows what tomorrow will bring, and even that isn't set in stone. Today I'm at peace with myself, even if it hurts. But I'm at peace.

What would make you reverse your decision? We'll see but for the moment, it's not even a question, it's a bit too soon. My statement was clear. Today, I'm stepping back, it's very clear, I'm stepping back because I need to mentally, in order to continue to perform and achieve the objectives with my club.

Tuesday, the executive committee of the French will discuss the topic of the French National Team and your decision to step away, as well as the decisions of Kadidiatou Diani and Marie-Antoinette Katoto. What message would you like to ask the Board? They have the power, it's not me that has it. We are all responsible [for this situation]: the French National Team, the staff, the players, the Federation. We are all responsible for this situation. We're players, we're implicated every time we wear the jersey, just like the staff is implicated as well. But the question I want to ask them [the Board] is this: "what is the level of your expectations?" From thereon, we can put things in place or not. It's not up to me to say it. It's up to them to make those decisions and to be held accountable to them.

[irrigos]

bit late but 6, 7, 35 for that ask game

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

I guess the obvious one is that my writing isn't very good. Or, more specifically, that I'm not actually good at conveying the things I want to convey. Are these characters actually sounding distinct from each other, or do they all sound exactly the same? I can say that I Eliot is charming and fake, that Morgan is smart but impulsive, that Jacob is patient and well-reasoned, but like... does any of that actually come across in my writing?

I've mentioned it before on here I think (and definitely i bring it up too much on my main lol) but I used to be on an actual play podcast, and the way people reacted to me/my characters honestly really shook my confidence in my own storytelling abilities. My character was a bard (so, high charisma) and i tried to play her as smart and charming even though she was also kind of a trashy mess, and everyone from my GM to our audience insisted she was dumb and everyone hated her?? The way people treated me made me really afraid to actually post any creative work ever again, because people would hold me to impossible standards, make me justify the decisions of my costars, and other than that, entirely ignored me. After the show ended (and we deleted all the episodes lol syonara you weeaboo shits, etc) i really felt like i was never going to be creative in public again, because I just didn't have the emotional fortitude to withstand it. If people were only going to pay attention when they wanted me to explain why a man I worked with did something problematic (I don't know! Ask him!), and otherwise, pretend I'm not there at all, like... why bother, you know?

So I guess my other fear is having to go through that again. It took me 4 years after the end of that show to start posting Book of Red Murder because i was genuinely just too afraid. (Thankfully everyone has been very nice, so thank u all)

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

sometimes u make an oc kiss and thats pretty good. and sometimes you share ur writing and people start calling you names because you made your fake little guys sad and u get to laugh at them

35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?

i can't really think of any!! i love properly implementing writing rules and when i fuck it up, i get sad. of course, it depends on what you define as "writing rules", because i love using sentences fragments but i also hate when a gun appears in act one but doesnt go off by act 3, yknow?

[truelove-cafe]

i am so sorry I have so many questions (hi we need to hang out soon btw I miss you) II, III, IV, VI, VII, IX, XI, XIV, XIX, XX for the ask game :D feel free to ignore some if they're too personal or anything

HIII dont be sorry i love answering these!! shaking you around ALSO I MISS YOU TOO im still so sorry i had to raincheck ): i will be free for most of this new week

II. The High Priestess - How is your innermost self like?

hmmm starting deep :3 well,, honestly im unsure how to answer this! mainly because i dont know if i have the right idea.. but what i THINK this is referring to is um. i guess im a lot more of a scared dog, inside. i have a lot of anxiety and nervousness in general, and a habit of withdrawing or (much less often) snapping at people when i feel unsafe or sad. i have a lot of separation anxiety as well — once i latch onto a person i do become the most gentle and devoted form of myself. i would sacrifice myself for them and their happiness, as long as they stayed with me. i think that at least part of this is something i need to work on, because while i love how loyal i am, i also cant place the burden of myself onto others (or, similarly, i cannot believe that i myself am a burden)

III. The Empress - How do you handle your darling’s friends and loved ones? Are you welcoming of other relationships (platonic/familial/etc.) in your darling’s life or are you more wary of them? 

i do have a possessive streak, ill admit. however i would never ask my darling to give up anybody in their life unless it is something they personally want to do. even if the person is bad for them, i dont think id outright say "get rid of them." of course, if i were given the okay to i might tell them that i dislike that person taking up their time when they aren't good for my darling, & i possibly will gatekeep my darling more often (i am as protective as i am possessive) but that's it. in the case of healthy and happy relationships that they have, id happily say how id love to meet those close to them! id want to get the okay from them (in reference to my relationship with my darling) as well!

in the best case scenario, id love to also form a closeness with those people in hopes that itd further my understanding of my darling and whatnot

IV. The Emperor - Is controlling your darling (consensually) important? How much of their life do you ideally want to dictate? 

i think to me its.. semi important? i like being in the know at the very least. some things i think would be exciting to get to "dictate" (outfits, smaller decisions like that as well), but in general im unsure that id want to fully control them. i have a fear of sorts where i dislike to be controlling out of worry. i dont want to hurt my darling or make them feel like they have to go along with everything i say. BUT that being said id also like to "monitor" & keep them extremely close to me as a means of control

VI. The Lovers - Would you care about your darling’s past or current romantic relationships, if any? 

id care a little bit! only because id want to live up to expectations, be good enough. i want to offer my darling something that cant be given by any other relationships they might have, so id have value. (that inner anxiety is real obvious now, huh? /silly) i am jealous, i wont deny i might think myself into moments of high obsession + possessiveness — but that can be soothed by myself

VII. The Chariot - What expectations or standards do you have for your darling? What do you ultimately desire?

hmm,, i dont really hold a lot of expectations, nor standards. i dont ask for a lot, just kindness and love. i think it truly lies in what i desire,, id really like a deep closeness & understanding with my darling, above all else. alongside that would be the type of relationship / dynamic where we would dote on each other. i admit sometimes im a little too caught up in my emotional whirlwind to offer gifts, but maybe in addition to or even instead of doting my darling could offer soothing words. what i would utterly adore is my darling being a princess, and i the devoted guard dog. in that situation, i would make them feel as special as possible, like royalty. theyd be my muse. in return id basically want to be treated like a dog lol (/nsx of course)

IX. The Hermit - Would you be content with only watching your darling from afar or do you feel the need to interact directly with them? Or does it vacillate between the two? 

i think it goes between the two! i usually watch for a long time before i ever approach a potential darling, so afterwards i do like to keep interaction going often. however whenever we're not talking i am very watchful,, i enjoy observing a lot! being on the outside can have its perks, and then i can see my darling go through day to day. but in general i think my desire for closeness wins & i crave interaction

XI. Justice - Are there things that you want to hide from your darling at all costs? If so, what?

actually, no i dont think so! there are things i have an urge to hide, but nothing that i would desperately seek to. if my darling asked me, id answer honestly. i used to have trouble with hiding things,, now i try to be as open as i possibly can

XIV. Temperance - Is there anything that your darling could say or do that would make your feelings for them waver? Would you be able to bounce back or would it permanently change how you view them? 

hmm this is a tough one. i dont think that my feelings could ever waver. in cases where they do it has to be a repeated action over a lot of time. in other cases, yes i would be able to bounce back. its really only in the most severe situations where im being repeatedly hurt by my darling could my feelings fade, and even then probably not entirely. if they had a different viewpoint on something i feel strongly about then i miiiight be disappointed and might need to distance from them or talk it out but i think thats about it!

XIX. The Sun - How would you react if your darling gave you affection? What is your internal thought process like? 

honestly a lot of excitement followed by screaming quietly + kicking my legs. i love affection so much. sometimes it makes me very soft, others it makes me affectionate as well. its something like oh darling gave me affection -> this is the best thing to ever happen to me!! -> does darling want a hug?? -> i love darling so so much!!!! ,,, which is pretty simple now that i think about it /silly

XX. Judgement - How do you ultimately view your darling? As someone greater than you, someone lower than you, or somewhere in between?

i think right now we're equals,,, which is a really great standing! i like that we are. usually i put people on pedestals much too soon, which doesnt work out so well. taking the time to know each other on the same level is really important and a wonderful experience. id really enjoy if one day it were a liiiittle bit unbalanced (where i would treasure them above myself, something of a higher being), but ultimately id do anything that my darling wanted or asked of me. id be happy always being equals, or them seeing me as greater (though in any situation i wont act like theyre below me)

[x----tine]

You recently published your second book of poetry, Goodnight Sweet Thing, and you’re known as a visual artist and filmmaker, too. At what point did you feel it was necessary to move between these different disciplines?

Well, I’ve always written poetry. I remember we first started studying poetry, in fifth grade, just Shel Silverstein and Robert Frost type stuff. We would have to write a lot of poems, and people liked my poem so much they would let me read them to them during the class, and I really enjoyed that. They were pretty silly poems, but ever since then, I didn’t really stop writing poetry. I didn’t really start taking it that seriously until I was 17 and that was the first time I was trying to get published.

I was very solitary, I had a best friend and she was also writing poems in high school, so I could only talk to her about it. I saw the Basquiat movie, the Julian Schnabel one, and I saw René Ricard’s character in it, and I was drawn to him because I was like, “Oh, he’s Puerto Rican,” and I’m Puerto Rican, and I hadn’t really seen anybody who was cool and Puerto Rican, into the things that I was into, that was also Puerto Rican. I looked him up and I found his book of poems, God with Revolver, which is my favorite book of poems. Most formative, for sure. His writing really influenced me, because I didn’t know that poems could be like that before I had been exposed to him. Very confessional and candid and like a knife being stuck into you.

I finally got published when I was 24 or something. I have a lot of poems from that time. A lot of the ones that I think are good enough are in the first book, which is the second half of [Goodnight Sweet Thing], that just spans a decade. I was being extremely picky.

To answer your question, though, when I was in high school, I was in TV production and had a crush on this punk kid who introduced me to Miranda July and David Lynch. I really wanted to impress him, and he used to stay after school and use the analog video editors to make video art. I was like, “Well, I guess I have to make a cool video, too.” I didn’t really think about it as video art then, but it totally is, and I was just making weird videos to impress him.

Because he was obsessed with The Wizard of Oz, I gave him this aluminum foil Tin Man that I made, and I put it in a Barbie box and painted it all and I made it look like it was prepackaged. I remember his impression of that. I didn’t really think about it as, “Oh, this is a sculpture,” or something, but I remember he was just so impressed by it. I guess he was the first person that really made me see myself as an artist. Seeing his response to it is what really made me feel like it was something that I really wanted to do. I think that experience was really formative, and he’s like a brother to me now.

What is your way into a poem? Does it start for you with a specific idea or an image, or is it something that’s kind of more malleable and amorphous, and is it similar with other mediums you work in?

They’re kind of different for me. With poetry, I would say it’s both. It depends on the poem. Sometimes I write a poem just for the sake of exercising the experience of writing a poem, which can be very playful and malleable, and I don’t usually know where that’s going to go. It’s just kind of a lot of word games, or just play with language, or just thinking about how the words connect. Also, there’s a natural impulsive intuitiveness to it. I would say most times I’m writing to document a feeling that I’m having, and I see them more like emotional pictures or something, of experiences that I’m having that I can’t really articulate or document in any other way, because I think those kinds of feelings are very fleeting, and I think that poetry is really good to capture fleeting emotion.

Earlier, when you were talking about how some of the poems that you didn’t put in your first book of poems, you were being really picky about it. What is it about looking at those that makes you say, “This is not something that I want,” or, “This is not up to my standard”?

I definitely have really high standards for what I reveal to the world, because I don’t want to embarrass myself, and I don’t like wasting people’s time. I feel like poetry in particular skirts a fine line between being really profound and beautiful, and being extremely corny and contrite. I’m always super mindful of that distinction.

I think poetry is definitely so vulnerable to me because it’s extremely personal, and it’s kind of the only space I give myself to be very direct and unapologetic. I feel like with my artwork, even if it has probably accents of that, it’s very mediated, just the very nature of it, the way that I’m presenting it.

Even if not all the poems are about me or about anybody, it’s very confessional. It’s funny because I looked back, I found the drive with all the really old poems, and I found all these ones that I’d never published, and I was like, “These are good.” I feel like it’s almost like, with the distance, I feel so removed from myself from over 10 years ago that I could look at it with more clarity. Whereas before, I don’t really know what that inhibition is, that kind of self-censorship feeling. Maybe I feel more sure of myself now that I have a lot more public validation.

In terms of reflecting on the totality of your career in arts, what is one thing that you wish you’d known when you were first starting out? Do you ever look back and say, “Maybe I should have done something differently?”

It’s funny because I was having a conversation about this with somebody the other day, and it’s a very dialectic thing. On one hand, choosing to be an artist, and I wasn’t the kind of artist that was like, “Oh, I want to do graphic design part-time or get a part-time job.” I was just like, “I’m all in.” I was a waitress. I’d done a lot of really random jobs, and the benefit of that is that I had preserved my own energy and my own time. But on paper, it was harmful in terms of kind of financial security. It’s really just a question of financial security versus your psychic security, because the time of the you afford yourself, or being on your on your own schedule. My energy gets really easily polluted by my environment, and if I’m in an environment that is really in opposition to myself for a very long time, it’s very hard for me to feel like I have the mental space to be where I need to be, to be creative in a way that is realistic.

My energy levels are so sensitive. I guess you can have a lot of critical acclaim, and it doesn’t mean that you’re going to have financial security. That’s all I need to say. It’s a very practical thing, but especially now, more than ever, the way social media has engineered this massive machine where we all have our own channels and we’re all kind of competing for attention to have the most visibility, and if you have the most visibility, then you have the most chances of having financial security, I think that’s what [people expect] the end result [to] feel like. After a certain point, you have a moment where you look back and you’re like, “Was it all worth it?”

I have asked myself that a lot lately, as I’m getting older, but for me, it was worth it. I wouldn’t be who I am. Material things aside, I feel very complete as a person, mentally, and I feel very happy with my internal space, and I think that’s just a trade-off. It’s what I need.

There’s a poem in Goodnight Sweet Thing titled “Change My Money with Your Life.” I’m thinking of the lines: “making cheap outfits yet again / poverty solutions.” How do artists, especially young artists, rectify that anxiety between needing to just make money and have our basic needs met, and also then time to create, while trying to build that career? Is it just trying to say yes to every opportunity that you can? Is it a mindset?

I think it depends on how young we’re talking. You do have to be careful about what context you place yourself in. I think when you’re really young, it’s normal to make a lot of mistakes or make decisions that you’ll regret later, maybe be embarrassed of. I certainly, have had to learn a lot. More than anything, I think you just have to have the drive. If you don’t have the drive and the will, this kind of urgency to express, then I think it’ll be very difficult, and maybe directionless, too. You have to have a strong drive in order to get anywhere with any creative field of this nature, like writing, when you’re the sole author, and it’s not a kind of commercial job. There’s a lot of loneliness in it, you’re doing it alone for so long, and you might always do it alone, and you just don’t know. It’s just probably one of the few jobs where you could work your ass off and do everything right, and there’s no promise that anything’s going to come of it.

If we were doctors, or, I don’t know, if we were in some corporate structure or something, there would be upward mobility that was very clear and delineated, for the most part. I know there’s issues with that too, but at least you would get a paycheck, I guess.

Do you ever hit a point where that urgency has ever gone away, and you’ve had to figure out how to get it back?

After I accomplished a certain number of things, I felt more subdued in my urgency, because I think before, it was like, I had to prove it to myself that my work was worthwhile or that people could connect to what I’m doing, but I have enough proof to know that people like what I do and that people do connect with it. Now, I still have compulsions to create things, and I could do so much more if I had more resources. Because I have had so much experience with various types of ways of presenting my work and working with other people, that I feel like probably this next decade would be the best for me creatively, and that would just depend on—mean, with or without this—but if I do get more financial investment on making things, I know that I could do stuff that’s really brilliant. I’ll just have to wait and see.

What is day-to-day life for you as a full-time artist?

Well, out of a lot of chaos, I have managed to create a very structured way of working for myself. That was not natural. It took many years for me to get to the place where I could organize my schedule. I can say I’m going to be at a certain time in certain place and do certain things, so I like to start my day with exercise. I like to go to the gym, and then I like to go to the studio. Because I have different mediums, it depends on what the deadlines are like, what the priority is, and if I don’t have any pressing deadlines, then it’s what’s most compelling to me personally. I juggle the filmmaking stuff, art stuff, and then the poetry. Poetry is more… I see poetry more as a hobby, if that makes sense, because it’s kind of like the performance art of literature. Only people who really like it do it. Anybody who does poetry is because they’re a real poet, I think, and I think that’s very beautiful, because you don’t have to censor yourself to kind of cater to any commercial needs. You can just let it be.

Is there anything that has surprised you about the business side of having to be an artist, even with poetry?

I have a lot of feelings about it. I mean, the artist has to do everything. They have to be their own administrator, manager, at least until you can afford to hire somebody to do it for you. We have wear so many hats throughout different phases of creative production. I feel like it would be very helpful if professors could have space to talk about the business of art in school. I don’t know how it is now, but when I was at school, it was kind of a taboo thing to talk about the practicalities of this profession, and I think I just felt so blind when I graduated from my bachelor’s. I had no idea how to make anything feasible in a kind of economy of art. It was only self-taught, really.

What would you say is the most useful thing that you’ve had to teach yourself about that process?

Don’t expect anybody to do anything for you, advocate for yourself and don’t low-ball yourself. I think a lot of times, artists and writers are put in a position to be grateful for any attention, because we’ve been vying so hard for attention for so many years. In the beginning, at least, I felt like it was like, “Oh my gosh, they want to do this thing.” You don’t think to yourself, “Oh, let me just ask for proper compensation.” With poetry, too, it’s the same, even having to… I know with bigger book deals, it’s not like this, but with smaller presses, you can get more fair royalties, 50/50, after production or whatever, of the cost. It’s very reasonable, but that seems like a hard thing to ask for, too.

I think a lot of people take the work for granted in terms of financial compensation. I can only speak for myself, but it felt like, “I’m going to get in trouble if I ask for it.” There were so many years of me selling myself short, but now I’m very clear about that, and I think creating a very practical way for you to get compensated fairly that fits for you, you’d be surprised. Most times you can get it.

How did you learn to make this shift?

Well, I think it’s just, maybe it was catastrophizing, thinking that, oh, if I ask for something, the other person’s going to be so insanely reactive that they’re going to want to rupture all ties or something, which is insane. That’s never happened to me. Really, the worst thing they can say is no, and that’s how I operate now. It’s good to exercise even thinking about what that looks like for you. What does fair compensation look like for you? Because, I felt like for a lot of time, I was just waiting for somebody to tell me, to be like, “Oh, this is what we give you.” If you just learn how to negotiate, you usually can get a little bit more, or everything that you wanted, and very rarely is it a hard no. Then, if it’s a hard no, you can decide if it’s worth any of it.

In terms of when you are working on a poem or a project or a film and it’s there, you’ve done it, how do you know when that feels ready?

It’s very personal. I generally don’t show work until it’s done unless I want feedback, but each process is different. Filmmaking is very communal, and it’s very collaborative, so it’s very natural to share multiple drafts and stuff of scripts and things with your producers or trusted people. With art, sometimes I’ll ask my husband. We share a studio and he’s an artist, too, and so we talk about that. I’ll ask him for feedback sometimes, but for the most part, I feel like I know when it’s done. It’s when I feel like, as I try to put myself in the position of the audience, and if I were to look at it, how would I assess it? I’m very strict, I have very definitive things that I look for that I find make me feel that it’s complete, it’s my own inner critic. Satisfying my own inner critic. When my inner critic is satisfied, then I feel like the work is done.

Are you willing to share some of your very strict rules that you have?

Don’t be lame, don’t be corny. The craft has to be there. I feel like I’m just such a craft snob. I just don’t respect people that don’t… I mean, whatever, it’s your thing if you don’t care about it, but it’s like, if you know about it, you know it when you see it. Also, every masterpiece has incorporated so much craft into it, and there’s no way that you can do it without thinking about it. Very rare, I think. I definitely have my own checklist across painting, film, poetry. Like, is it clean? Everything absolutely has to be there. If there’s anything that doesn’t have to be there, it doesn’t belong there. Making sure that it’s well-made on top of everything. Don’t sell yourself short. This is your product. This is what you’re giving to the world. There’s nothing worse than wasting a person’s time. People who spend time reading a book or watching a movie or going out of their way to go to a museum or art show to see something, why would you waste their time, but also waste your own time? Why would you waste your own time to not ask yourself these questions? It’s just, I’m a very rigorous person, I guess is what I want to say, and I expect this of other people, and I expect it of myself, so I’m not lax with myself, because when it’s there, it’s there.

It’s about being hard on yourself, but in the right way, right?

Yeah, because you don’t want to be hard enough that you don’t do anything. It’s really having the kind of distance where you can really be clear. Don’t have a big ego, because if you have a big ego, you’re setting yourself up for a lot of failure. I don’t think things should feel too easy. Sometimes things are easy and they’re flowing, but I mean, there’s so much that we digest culturally and in media, visually, words. We consume so much, so you want to be able to distill or separate the stuff that your brain is just processing from what your actual expression is, versus repeating another expression. Or maybe this expression feels normal because of our societal roles or something, but you don’t realize that your expression is hurtful to other people, because you’re not thinking about your societal role. It’s hard articulate. I’ve never really had to think about it in this way, but I just expect the same for myself as what I expect from the things that I love most, that I feel are really moving, strong works, and that’s what I aspire to do, is to make really strong, moving works. I see it as an Olympian challenge.

Some Things

Cristine Brache Recommends:

The books: God With Revolver by René Ricard, Making Of by Mara Mckevitt, and The Kiss by Kathryn Harrison.

The film, Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) by Toshio Matsumoto.

Weegee’s 1940s photo series of New York City’s moviegoers entitled, Movie Theaters and Kohei Yushiyuki’s 1970s photo series, The Park.

The song “Cowboys and Angels” by George Michael.

[demifiendcruithne]

okay so i have. no idea if this is a thing that already exists or if it's even feasible (for my original idea, anyway, it expanded as i was writing), but:

a pokemon file generator so people can do pseudo-wonder trades in gens 1-7. everything generated would be fully legal, random IVs, weighted to be more likely common stuff (but often with an egg or TM move for variety), shiny standard chance etc, and it could include event mons so people get a chance to play with those i miss doing wonderlockes, but doing one in SWSH/SV would be... Interesting with all the hacked mons + the stuff from dlcs at super high level (though i guess i could just retrade until i get something else) and also i don't know if i can use the internet connection on a second user file so rip. so i'd use this for it

my original idea was 'i wonder if pretendo network could do a generator like this if someone waits too long for a wonder trade with a real person' but anyone with access to pretendo would be able to put the mon in themselves anyway so

honestly i'd put it as a long-term project for myself, but pkhex is written in C# which i know nothing about (i'd need at least to integrate with it to do legality checks even if i then put the mon in manually because heck putting it in manually to find it's illegal) and there's. no physical way i could do it myself so i guess if anyone either knows of a project like this or wants to do one i'm interested? (if it already exists Please tell me) potential options could be include/exclude event mons, a level range, held item chance, and the like

what i would be able to help with is compiling a spreadsheet of potential nicknames for generated mons so that people had that option, from stuff such as name websites, mythological figures, game characters, bad puns etc? i'm a big spreadsheet nerd so - could easily categorise it so people can choose categories? as well as compiling lists per-mon or per-type or just let any nickname be for anything obviously if generated they could also just nickname it themselves but for the true wonder trade experience we should have the option to randomly get stuff like. a marill named rayquaza or joe pesci the pidgey holding a master ball