#because art is hard and i have limited time
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alitlantern · 20 hours ago
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#𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐍 ━━━━━━━━━ ⚖️ ɪɴᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅᴇɴᴛ / ᴍᴜᴛᴜᴀʟꜱ ᴏɴʟʏ / ꜱᴇʟᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ᴄᴀʀʀᴅ , ʀᴜʟᴇꜱ , ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ , ᴛᴀɢꜱ
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ᴛʜᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜꜱᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ꜰɪᴛ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ ᴛʜɪᴍʙʟᴇ.
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𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐒 ━━━━━━━━━━━━━⚡ an unfriendly aesop: when a moral lesson conflicts with our understanding of "good."
― Melody, 29, they/she
― Account is 18+, NSFW is for 23+
― Disabled, chronically online, horrendous sleep schedule
― Right off the bat, I am sex positive, kink friendly, and a taboo safe haven. I don’t believe in “pro shipping” or anything of that ilk. As long as you’re an adult and not hurting anyone IRL, I beg you to write what you want. With me, even! I’ll write fucked up shit with you gleefully! Censoring will only aid the corrupt.
― Haven’t been on Tumblr in probably 5 years, but I was here in the advent of RP and have a long, sordid history with it
― Iconless bc I’m not trying to screenshot games like that. It’s fine if you use them though!
― Don’t worry about matching my format, of course! I’m very lazy with it as it is
― Have played all the DA games + DLCs, working through the books now
― Constructive criticism about lore is always accepted!
― Brevity is the soul of art or whatever but I suck at it. Sorry :D
― Plotting >>>>
― I can usually bounce off of anything someone sends me, if plotting isn’t your jam, but I am here for the girls, the gays, and the theys that both want a 12 hour long yap session about every intricate detail and also write it all
― Explicit NSFW can be written on the dash if both parties are chill with it. If you wanna write it but don’t want it on the dash, I will be more than happy to move to Discord or Google docs! Also, I’m obviously just as happy to fade to black if need be.
― Favorite genres: Angst, hurt/comfort NSFW/erotica, fluff. I can roll with anything though
― Dark/Mature/Taboo themes will be mentioned; Anders is canonically a victim in many ways and I do not shy away from representing the fact.
― Please move ask responses to separate threads, linking to the original. Also, it doesn’t matter how much time has passed since I answered the ask; always feel free to turn anything into a thread!
― This is controversial but my biggest pet peeve is dropped threads. I’m disabled and have a very limited attention span, but I will still always go out of my way to not drop threads. It may take me weeks to reply, but no thread is ever dropped unless we’ve talked about it. I really hope for the same level of committment to this hobby from those I share it with
― Another controversial take; I don’t always follow with the intent to write. Yes, of course, I would love to write with absolutely everyone and will make that happen as much as I can, but I don’t think it’s a requirement to stay mutuals, or to even be friends! Sometimes I follow people just because I like the way they write, or I want to read their headcanons, or I mean to write with them in the future. I’m not in a rush here to figure out what to do with every last mutual. If that bothers you, please hard block me. No hard feelings!
― Dupes are welcome! We don’t have to write anything but I would love to be friends with people who love Anders as much as I do!
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putschki1969 · 1 day ago
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🇹🇭KEIKO Bangkok Pilgrimage🇹🇭
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Imagine my surprise when I saw that the latest Niku&Choco fan club magazine contained a two-page feature of Keiko's private trip to Bangkok earlier this year. I had originally planned to spend a few relaxing days in Thailand with the one or the other more eventful activity but seeing all the things that Keiko had done, I naturally felt inspired to do the same stuff. First I needed to find out what exactly she had done, where she had gone and what she had eaten. I put on my Putschki Holmes hat and started researching right away. After some initial difficulties I was able to figure out almost everything. My friends helped provide some additional info and were of course kind enough to play tourist guide for me in some of the more confusing locations.
From what I can tell, Keiko must have stayed either around the Siam area or a little further out around the Sukhumvit line. Her activities were mostly limited to Siam Paragon (a big mall at Siam station) and Central Embassy (another big mall at Phloen Chit station). She also visited the Talad Noi district near Bangkok's famous Chinatown. Without further ado, let's get to it〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→
❗This is FAN CLUB EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗DO NOT USE/SHARE ON OTHER SITES❗ ❗SUPPORT KEIKO and JOIN her FAN CLUB. Detailed TUTORIAL❗
Talad Noi
This area is famous for its gorgeous street-art. Keiko took lots of pictures in front of some of the more extravagant pieces. I tried posing in a similar manner but oh boy, I totally failed. It's almost embarrassing how horribly stiff I look in most of these...And you know what?! I ordered these exact pants earlier this month but unfortunately, they didn't arrive in time for my trip 😔How cool would it have been to take these pictures wearing the same pants as Keiko! *sobs* A huge thank you to my friends who joined me on this little adventure in Talad Noi. I never would have found these specific murals without their help. Also, kudos to us for taking approximately five million pictures in the sweltering heat. It was so hot and humid that day💦
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Siam Paragon & Siam Center
Had a great time at Siam Paragon. The food court was amazing. A shame that I couldn't try everything in a single day. I decided to try the frozen yogurt from Yolé and a shabu-shabu set at Hitori Shabu. Wanted to try McDonald's too because I was curious about some of the Thailand-limited items but there was just not enough time for all that extra food. I only took a picture in front of the Fire Tiger place at Siam Center (not much of a smoothie person to be honest).
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Central Embassy
Lots of yummy food to choose from at Central Embassy. Keiko did nothing but eat there it seems. I was only there for half a day so I honestly had a hard time deciding on what to try. Eventually I ended up going to the shaved-ice place "The Dessert by Kaithong Original" because I was craving something cold. I cheated a little bit with "Somboon Seafood" because I only went there to take some pictures with my acrylic Cakey but I didn't actually eat anything at the restaurant until a few days later. Went to another more popular branch with some friends and we ordered the famous crab curry. I also only took a few pictures outside of "Din Tai Fung", it's a shame though because I would have enjoyed some dim sum but honestly, that shaved ice thingy almost killed me
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Airport
Last but not least, a final picture at the airport before it's time to fly back home.
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memorystormsanctuary · 1 year ago
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Day 3~ Friends of Lovers
Day three of @khoc-week and we come to the prompt of friends or lovers. This prompt brings to mind all the friends our ocs have and those special someones too. 
For Y this day was a bit of a challenge, if only because there were so many options. Y has a bright and friendly nature, and like Sora she easily makes friends wherever she goes. Of all my various Kingdom Hearts Oc’s she’s the one who has the most friends. She has managed to find a place within so many groups. 
The focus however came to rest one four characters, the Wayfinder trio and her twin brother, X. Y finds herself most attached to the Wayfinder trio, her best friends from the start. And though she has lost them, her goal was to always find them one day. And of course as a twin, Y is fiercely attached to her brother. Though their relationship has had it’s ups and downs they always find a way to come back together. After all the light is rarely found without darkness close behind.
Part of Y wished the sunset would finally end so the night could start. As much as she loved the beautiful colors of the sky above Twilight Town, she missed the stars. It made a part of her ache. Like she was missing something very important. Something she needed the night to do. Though it was easy to guess what it was she was missing.
Y was the last one on the clock tower that day. X had left early, using one of his usual excuses of being tired of everyone and their chatter. He was smiling when he had left though, so Y took that as a good sign. He was smiling more and more these days. Axel, Roxas, and Xion had all left together. Apparently if they didn’t return by a decent time there would be a chance of their bosses heckling when they did return. Part of Y could only laugh at Axel seeming to herd the other two. Yuki had been there the longest. She always seemed to hover for a few moments longer, casting Y nervous glances every so often. Like she was waiting for Y to speak. Whatever the reason was, she eventually left wishing Y a good night.
Y didn’t mind being the last to leave. As much as she loved her friends she liked the chance to be alone with her thoughts. Though it did usually end with her thinking the same thing. She missed the stars. She missed the way they would shine above her. She missed that if she was lucky she could catch a meteor shower.
If there was a meteor shower she was usually joined by Ventus. He always seemed to know when one was about to happen. And they would sit under the stars, Y telling Ven stories as they pointed to each falling star. There would be laughs and smiles and nervous glances as they waited for the moment they were inevitably discovered.
If they were lucky, Terra would be the one to find them first. Terra would only last about a minute of scolding before he would sit with them too. And then Y wouldn’t have to tell the stories anymore. Terra would take over for her, telling all sorts of things, stories from before Ven and Y had joined them at the Land of Departure, and the things the Master had never told the younger wielders. Y could spend hours outside on the cliff, listening to Terra explain the things that excited him most. But if Terra found them, it was never long until Aqua joined them.
Aqua was much less likely to let them off with a light scolding. She might go on for a little longer, but usually she would eventually settle in beside them. And she would listen to Terra’s stories, correcting details where needed, and fussing over Ven and Y both for being out when nights could get cold in the Land of Departure.
It was so hard to believe the last night like that had been over ten years ago.
“Are you coming back to the castle at all tonight?”
Y jumped glancing over her shoulder. X stood leaned against the side of the clocktower, his arms crossed as he looked at her with an eyebrow raised. For a moment Y saw the dark deep brown his eyes once were, but quickly she corrected her mind. His eyes were purple now.
“Yeah, is it that late?” Y asked. It wasn’t normal for him to come looking for her. Usually she could get away with being out however long she wanted. Though that may have been because she always managed to come back at a decent enough time.
“Getting there,” X confirmed. “You’ve been staying out later and later the longer we’ve been meeting here. What are you thinking?”
“I think you can guess,” Y admitted. She turned her back on her brother. Looking back over the town she watched the rays of light spreading farther and farther. It was always twilight in this world, so she would never really get to see the stars she wished for.
“Does Roxas bother you?” X asked. He moved silently, Y was only aware he had moved when he sat down beside her once again.
“He did,” Y admitted. She could remember the way she couldn’t breathe the first time she saw him. It had taken a fair time for her to learn to let go of her breath and not react like every time he spoke she was getting stabbed through her heart. “But I’m ok now. They’re really not all that similar once you get past their looks and voice.”
“But you’re still thinking about them,” X said.
“I always think about them,” Y said, forcing a smile as she glanced at X. He wasn’t watching her. At least not in a way that was obvious. “I miss them.”
“I’m sorry,” X said softly. Y smiled, this one a little less forced as she bumped her shoulder to her brothers.
“I know you are,” she said. She hoped he would smile and bump her back. But he didn’t. He only stared down at the ground beneath them. Sometimes she thought he was harder on himself than she ever was on him. Though that was part of the reason she had even forgiven him in the first place. If he hadn’t been so filled with remorse she probably wouldn’t have believed him. Would have still tried to fight him. “Do you think we’ll ever see them again?”
“I’ll make sure of it,” X said firmly, nodding his head in confirmation. Perhaps for Y, perhaps for himself. “We could start looking, rather than wait.”
“What?” Y asked, her head tilting to the side.
“Ventus and Terra are a little more difficult to figure out, but we know Aqua is just in the realm of darkness. We could look for her, on our free time,” X said. He still wasn’t looking at her. And for a moment Y thought she might have been imagining it.
“You mean it?” Y asked.
“Of course,” X said. “I don’t say anything I don’t mean.” A lie of course, but Y still felt herself comforted by it. Y smiled, leaning onto X almost fully. He huffed but said nothing else.
“Thank you,” Y said.
“Don’t thank me,” he said. “I haven’t done anything yet.”
Y only hummed a response, her mind racing.
She couldn’t wait for her old friends to meet her new ones. It would be nice for them all to be together under the stars.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months ago
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ISAT & Dungeon Meshi swap!
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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago
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recent lounging babey images
#he's so floppy recently and I hope it's just the heat. I think wamr weather makes everyone floppy and loungy#a beauntifulle boye...#cats#STILL working on posting some drafts. finishing new poll adventure.. other things... It's just hard with the weather and other things going#on. I've had a few more doctors appointments and other things to do recently that have to be done in a time limit#so I hvae to use my extremely limited energy working on that instead of doing the things I'd really rather do. :T#Main focuses though are keeping up better with doing and posting costumes + sculptures as main creative things. at least finishing the#main poll adventure story. Reworking the game I kind of abandoned for a few years. keeping up with game videos and a few other side things.#Especially the game though. I've been in a really worldbuildy mood recently. I just wish that was easier to manifest into something. I've#now put the worldbuilding slideshow reading video on pause for a while because it's SOOO long to do#and I think I should prioritize making games and stuff instead. but still other things. IT's just kind of like.. I have a whole world and#everything very built and planned out but now.. what do I do with it? what's the best way to share that? factual slideshows just going over#the information like a dictionary? make it into a game? write short stories? do art attached to the world? etc. etc. ?? There are so many#potential avenues I end up kind of flip flopping between them a lot because none really seem more beneficial than the others and they all#seem equally enjoyable and also equally hard so. It's like?? I guess just do what the hell ever and hope I made the right choice in terms o#cost benefit and reward for my time lol. ANYWAY.. Also why I'm in my 'trying to make friends' era still because I think having other creat#ive friends can help you find direction like.. people will meet each other and then go 'hey lol just for fun lets start a project together!#and then like 5 years later it's genuinely become something. etc. having other people to help weed out ideas and start small creative teams#together and etc. I feel is a very beneficial part of networking or whatever but also I have the social capacity of a stale bread roll and#am also inherently unrelatable to seemingly a majority of people due to my hermit wizard swag (detachment from general society and hyper#focus on fantasy worlds in my head gjhghj) so trying to meet people as a grown adult with social issues is Very easy and fun (it is not)#even very basic things like my core communication style is so incompatible with a lot of people it's like.. hhhh... People in this modern#age have GOT to stop being afraid of phone calls and/or text that is longer than 6 paragraphs. Work with me here. I WANT to talk to you. bu#I do not know what your emojis mean and it's physically impossible for me to type less than 85 sentences. please.. hhjgjgb#AAANYWAY!! I am working on things when I can given the circumstances (SUMMER).. hopefully some costume pictures and stuff soon. :'3#I've not forgotten about my art and etc. - as usual I just am bad at social media and also functioning if it's above 65F lol
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mister13eyond · 9 months ago
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talking to a friend about getting back into art and i think the #1 most important piece of art advice i could ever get or give is just "figure out what is FUN to you"
like i think there is sooooo much emphasis on how to build SKILL in art but a lot of it really treats art like a job or like video game grinding, like it's this thankless job that you have to work at in order to reach a Threshold and i know it's not EASY to make yourself have fun but like
imo a solid 70% of the reason i create art is because the Act of Drawing is fun to me. it's fun problem-solving and planning and putting down lines and playing with colors and tools. it's fun to depict little scenes in my head or to create outfits or to find ways to fill the canvas. never forget that creating can be fun. sometimes it's hard and sometimes you have to battle through your own blockades to get there but the ultimate goal should always be to ENJOY it, to find what you enjoy doing and then do it forever. improvement will follow enjoyment.
i think especially with all the debate about ML image generation it's more important than ever to embrace FUN. if you're only focused on the end result it's so easy to get in your own head- to think about what doesn't look good or what skills you don't have yet or to compare yourself to other artists. but photography didn't kill the art of drawing and AI won't either because, simply put, there will always be people who want to do the physical act of making art because it's fun to do! using paints and markers, splashing colors around, doing shitty pen doodles, using the symmetry tool in your art program to do abstract mandalas that are just squiggles formed into patterns. do art like you're 5 and you've been handed markers to pass the time. do art like you're bored in class and you're keeping your brain entertained by drawing stick figure comics in the margins. do art like an absent thing, do art because it satisfies your brain. the goal is not to make something beautiful and perfect, the goal is to make something because your hands need to make and your body needs to make.
#i know and love so many people who have intense anxiety about their ability to create art and who are so hard on themselves about the result#and i think that's a REALLY easy thing to feel because creating is also vulnerable & physically difficult and there is SOOOO much to master#but i think for me the people who churn out 300 colored pencil front facing hands behind their backs oc doodles on lined notebook paper-#are the ones with the right idea. they're the ones i aspire to be like#i'm not saying i never struggle either bc tbh#as someone with depression and adhd there are times where the Act of Having Fun is simply not possible#sometimes i CAN'T enjoy things because my ability to feel joy is locked behind a barrier of my mental illness#so i don't think it's an Easy thing to do by far and I don't think you can just Magically Make Yourself Happy And Having Fun#but i DO think that experimenting in a low-stakes low-pressure manner until you find something that clicks in your brain helps#doing things for the sake of doing them is the only way to figure out which ones WILL be fun to you#not all of them will. some things will feel like a slog#but i think you have to look for the passion before you're able to face the slog#if you jump right into the parts that are Hard and Challenge Your Limits it's easy to spin your wheels and get stuck#but if you focus on the super small stakes and the things that are thoughtless and focused more on Sensation-#the sensory experience of mixing paint or the scratch of pencil on paper or the smooth way a specific pen makes lines-#then you can lose yourself in the physical aspect of it FIRST#and then once you've started really ENJOYING those sensations you can start learning new ways to use them#because now you have the drive to want to do more#now you have the desire to find new ways to apply this thing you like doing#long post#even longer tags#art#drawing#artists#art advice
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nothing-nothing454545 · 3 months ago
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no, i dont think im obligated to still small talk an hour into my meet up with a friend group ive been a part of for 2 years, and i dont think im overreacting or showing a lack of loyalty when im unsatisfied with such a conversation. As someone who hates small talk, that friend group isn't for me, and i get nothing from it, and i will choose not to feel like a weirdo (derogatory) or a traitor (..because we didn't promise each other we'd be together forever afaik), for being unsatisfied and leaving. ive shown them affection (that i didnt fully feel) for as long as i could
#switching to small talk bc i dont vibe with them is something my mom suggested#i know they feel the same but even then i think it feels bad to suddenly end it.#probably bc i dont want them to see how bad id treat them if we werent friends. i dont want them to hate me even more#but also i have to come to terms with the fact i will have no friend group if things go this way#because i dont talk to ppl and better ppl wont magically materialise in my dms#or on the lone forest bench i sit on when biking or at the rpg sessions i go to. bc people there are never my type#ppl on the bench are too rich and sporty and ppl on the rpg are too sigma male#im pretty much only hoping ill meet people in college or at art classes irl. or a convention but i didnt even have time to go this year#i should start meeting ppl online but if i dont show my face (online games) it usually doesnt go anywhere#and if i do show my face (tinder) and i mess up (like you do on tinder which is a risky place)#im losing the limited queer people in my city forever. im using up a very finite resource#i could go to meet ppl on tumblr but we will never go to voice call bc its not what you do here#conclusion: what i should do is join more random fandom discords thru tumblr and wait til theyre on call#(<- option A.)#or wait til im in some classes and join a discord with people from my school but not my class#(<- option B.)#however i dont even want to talk to people#fuck people. im tired of people#theres a number of ways i could make friends but i hate everyone i meet and am constantly pissed off and dissatisfied#i may just be aplatonic#its hard to come to terms with
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arolesbianism · 3 months ago
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Doodle of my boy
#keese draws#eternal gales#oc art#oc#fydd <3333333333#he is my bestie I need to get over my fear of drawing him so bad#grips bathroom sink I Will get better at drawing for fun and letting my art be messy and being proud of it anyways#but yeah look at him he is so cute and is so silly and he’s never gone through any traumatic events ever I would never#<- lying lier who lies and loves tormenting it’s ocs#but yeah he’s half alien half human but was raised entirely by his human mom#his alien mom is alas stuck in the cult the two met at rip#fydd doesn’t know abt any of that tho he just knows that he has another mom that his mom doesn’t like talking abt#he loves playing games of all kind but especially loves video games and will play them for hours#not that he has much else to do since he’s spent pretty much his entire life living by a garbage dump in the middle of nowhere#and he’s not allowed to go fuck around in the dump much since his mom doesn’t want him to be seen so he’s stuck at home most of the time#thankfully now he has an adopted sister to play with but he still has viddy game autism#his mom has done her best to introduce him to the various cultures she and his other mom came from but she struggles with it#she was quite disconnected from her own culture growing up and she knows limited amount about her girlfriends home planet#fydd doesn’t mind much rn cause he’s 12 but a certain other older fydd might care a smidge more#fydd does like 60% know both japanese and spanish tho so that’s pretty cool#his mom tried to do regular lessons when he was younger but wasn’t able to keep them up consistently and eventually gave up#mostly because she wasn’t anywhere near fluent in either herself and she had a hard time keeping up with how fast fydd would pick up on it#they still have some books from back then laying around that fydd will pick up and read aloud when he’s bored sometimes#he gets bored of speaking english all the time as his brain is built to pick apart different sounds and assign them linguistic meaning#so reading and speaking different languages is good enrichment for him#his mom doesn’t know this unfortunately otherwise she totally would have gotten him more stuff in different languages to chew on#he does get to learn the language the stalien cast speaks tho he has a lot of fun with that#he alas can’t properly experience most stalien video games though rip#I should rly get to redesigning his human mom again at some point she needs it sooo bad#I mean her whole squad needs it but she’s my favorite so like
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the-trans-dragon · 1 year ago
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It's hilariously therapeutic to watch Cutthroat Kitchen because a lot of the time, when a man loses, he has the funniest little reaction.
Like even if the judge was very clear and explicit about why he got voted off, he'll be like "I thought my dish was great. I shouldn't have been voted off. I deserved to win, because I'm a good chef no matter what the judge said." (When they've done things like serve uncooked meat or used a plain century egg as garnish)
Like goddamn, people are surviving just fine, without constantly being upset with themselves for small mistakes? They can even ignore huge mistakes and chose to believe they are perfect, and apparently this has been a successful survival technique for them because they're still alive.
So maybe I can forgive myself for small things. Maybe I can be nice to myself about it. Apparently I could even lie to myself about it and pretend it wasnt a big deal or wasnt my fault I'd probably be fine--so it's probably okay if I let some cereal expire, and if I can't fend off the guilt and self-loathing about it, then its a valid option to just say "well its the cereal's fault for expiring" or something silly to escape the pointless unbearable guilt.
Like I don't plan to do that for meaningful mistakes, but why not resort to Overconfident Man Confidence to dodge debilitating shame over throwing away a single paper bag that I've been reusing for months and it's finally beyond use but I feel like I'm wasting resources and should fix it? My guilt and shame aren't playing fair or logical so I am allowed to use sneaky tricks like "borrowing confidence from a man raised to believe he is never wrong" to fight back lol.
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neverendingford · 2 years ago
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#friendship arc over. time for your regularly scheduled unfriending of all new social contacts#the problem with making friends is that if you're not actually making good friends then they're not worth the energy they cost#I have a limited amount of mana and low value friends with high mana cost are simply not worth keeping in my deck.#I'm never going to get anywhere spending my energy on people who provide nothing in return#yes altruism is good. yes we give and love and grow#but I cannot give without recharge. I cannot love if I am not loved in return.#I can't hold a conversation if you never talk back#it's not a date if only one of us shows up#sorry. I'm in a mood cause I'm watching Arcane and honestly I might be vibing with Jinx a little too hard#I could keep talking but the problem is people read these now. you see me now. you see me hurt. you see me scream and cry and bleed#do you remember the night I rambled about Mononoke? I talked about ego death and how my whole world was spinning#I couldn't see straight and I could barely sit up#I poisoned myself. did you know that? I tell everyone I cut my veins because that's easier#easier than telling them that I put my chemistry skills to good use that night. natural oils and pills from the local pharmacy#all in neat little capsules homemade#I make everything myself. food. lanyard. comb. gloves. even shoes one time.#I've made my skin a hundred times over. I counted one time. you know that? I counted how many scars I have.#give me a second I'm gonna make art now#tag talk
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werevampiwolf · 3 months ago
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I was born with exotropia of the right eye, though not as much to the degree in the picture. I was basically taught as I grew up to move my eyes independently in order to "look normal". It was mentally tiring, but I had done it my whole life and didn't really think about it much.
Then, I took a medication for my neurological issues with a very rare possible side effect of permanent vision loss via damage to the brain or optic nerve. It was rare enough that I wasn't warned of it, but unfortunately I'm someone who tends to get the rare side effects due to having a CYP mutation which effects how my body processes drugs. I ended up blind in my right eye. I was still fairly young, maybe 18, and my brain was still plastic enough that I got some of my vision back, at least enough to see movement and light, after I'd stopped taking that medication.
But it took more than four years to get to that point, and in the meantime, since I couldn't see out of my eye anyway, I stopped bothering with trying to keep my eyes aligned, and now I have exotropia again. And I have very much noticed an uptick of people treating me like a toddler, or otherwise making assumptions that I have a limited capacity to understand even simple concepts (like how money works), and I can only guess it's because they think I'm intellectually disabled, which I am not. I am developmentally disabled though, and I have been my whole life, but people haven't always acted this way. It's just been since my exotropia came back.
So I can very much vouch for the fact that people treat people who are "wall-eyed" differently. I've even noticed that when I wear my sunglasses, which are mirrored wrap-arounds, I get treated more like I used to. Granted, I have other facial features people tend to associate with "stupid" cartoon characters, which are also common for people with Down Syndrome (I have a face that's: disproportionately small for my head with a large forehead, wide-spaced almond-shaped eyes, a flat face, and a small chin and mouth) I had figured that that was why people were treating me differently, but my face has always looked like this, except for my eyes.
(I have enough of the physical features associated with Down Syndrome that I've sometimes wondered if I do actually have Down Syndrome, and my parents never told me. That would be in-character for them. They very much did not want me to be tested for autism, which I do have, because they didn't want to have to accept that "something is wrong with me".)
what if we stopped giving characters strabismus as a funny joke. what if we stopped? what if we stopped. what if we stopped
why the fuck do i even need to say this. "it's googly eyes" no, real people look like that. and you know they do. i know you know they do
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ID: a graphic titled "strabismus (misaligned eyes) by Cleveland Clinic. there are 4 types of strabismus, each represented by a drawing of a person with it.
Hypotropia: eye points downward.
Exotropia: eye points outward.
Hypertropia: eye points upward.
Esotropia: eye points inward.
end ID
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prokopetz · 8 months ago
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On the one hand, it's true that the way Dungeons & Dragons defines terms like "sorcerer" and "warlock" and "wizard" is really only relevant to Dungeons & Dragons and its associated media – indeed, how these terms are used isn't even consistent between editions of D&D! – and trying to apply them in other contexts is rarely productive.
On the other hand, it's not true that these sorts of fine-grained taxonomies of types of magic are strictly a D&D-ism and never occur elsewhere. That folks make this argument is typically a symptom of being unfamiliar with Dungeons & Dragons' source material. D&D's main inspirations are American literary sword and sorcery fantasy spanning roughly the 1930s through the early 1980s, and fine-grained taxonomies of magic users absolutely do appear in these sources; they just aren't anything like as consistent as the folks who try to cram everything into the sorcerer/warlock/wizard model would prefer.
For example, in Lyndon Hardy's "Five Magics" series, the five types of magical practitioners are:
Alchemists: Drawing forth the hidden virtues of common materials to craft magic potions; limited by the fact that the outcomes of their formulas are partially random.
Magicians: Crafting enchanted items through complex manufacturing procedures; limited by the fact that each step in the procedure must be performed perfectly with no margin for error.
Sorcerers: Speaking verbal formulas to basically hack other people's minds, permitting illusion-craft and mind control; limited by the fact that the exercise of their art eventually kills them.
Thaumaturges: Shaping matter by manipulating miniature models; limited by the need to draw on outside sources like fires or flywheels to make up the resulting kinetic energy deficit.
Wizards: Summoning and binding demons from other dimensions; limited by the fact that the binding ritual exposes them to mental domination by the summoned demon if their will is weak.
"Warlock", meanwhile, isn't a type of practitioner, but does appear as pejorative term for a wizard who's lost a contest of wills with one of their own summoned demons.
Conversely, Lawrence Watt-Evans' "Legends of Ethshar" series includes such types of magic-users as:
Sorcerers: Channelling power through metal talismans to produce fixed effects; in the time of the novels, talisman-craft is largely a lost art, and most sorcerers use found or inherited talismans.
Theurges: Summoning gods; the setting's gods have no interest in human worship, but are bound not to interfere in the mortal world unless summoned, and are thus amenable to cutting deals.
Warlocks: Wielding X-Men style psychokinesis by virtue of their attunement to the telepathic whispers emanating from the wreckage of a crashed alien starship. (They're the edgy ones!)
Witches: Producing improvisational effects mostly related to healing, telepathy, precognition, and minor telekinesis by drawing on their own internal energy.
Wizards: Drawing down the infinite power of Chaos and shaping it with complex rituals. Basically D&D wizards, albeit with a much greater propensity for exploding.
You'll note that both taxonomies include something called a "sorcerer", something called a "warlock", and something called a "wizard", but what those terms mean in their respective contexts agrees neither with the Dungeons & Dragons definitions, nor with each other.
(Admittedly, these examples are from the 1980s, and are thus not free of D&D's influence; I picked them because they both happened to use all three of the terms in question in ways that are at odds with how D&D uses them. You can find similar taxonomies of magic use in earlier works, but I would have had to use many more examples to offer multiple competing definitions of each of "sorcerer", "warlock" and "wizard", and this post is already long enough!)
So basically what I'm saying is giving people a hard time about using these terms "wrong" – particularly if your objection is that they're not using them in a way that's congruent with however D&D's flavour of the week uses them – makes you a dick, but simply having this sort of taxonomy has a rich history within the genre. Wizard phylogeny is a time-honoured tradition!
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doberbutts · 8 days ago
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One of the really insidious ways black people in media get treated is that despite our stereotypes expanding outside of "thug" "slave" and "prostitute", we are still very limited on *what* we can be portrayed as.
It is no shock to me that the two black women in Veilguard, for instance, are either medium toned like myself or a nonhuman skin color (introduced as a woman). It doesn't escape my attention that the only black woman in Baldur's Gate list of companions is also a nonhuman skin color. Dark skinned black women are still considered too unattractive to include as potential romanceable candidates, as it *also* does not escape my attention that the darkest we've had was Vivienne who was simultaneously regarded as an incredibly unlikeable character by huge swaths of the fandom and also unavailable for romance.
But moreover- why can't the bubbley nerdy cute mage be a black woman? Why can't the shy but resourceful archer be a black woman? Why does the black woman have to be someone with their guard up, walls as high as a skyscraper, cynical and callous? Why can't the black woman be the warm and loving Wynne, or the somewhat naive yet devout Leliana? The stalwart and just Aveline? I know plenty of Isabelas, and Viviennes, and Neves, and Taashs, but I also know plenty who are Merrill, or Bellara*, or Harding, or Cassandra, and I even lived with a Sera for a while. Why can't she be Bethany or Morrigan?
The closest we had was Josephine, who again is still fairly light skinned, but at least she has a bit more flexibility. And she isn't a companion, so her screen time is fairly minimal if you're not taking the time to romance her.
*And I don't begrudge Bellara too much, as A: I adore her and B: I'm pretty sure she's our first visibly Asian companion which is a milestone in itself. My point is more that Bellara could be black with virtually no story change because I know plenty of bubbly chirpy friendly black women who have a deep love of their hobbies and interests, who are bisexual and even prefer women, with deep trauma in their pasts, and yet the choice to *not* do that speaks to a problem the media has in their depiction of black women that is far bigger than Bioware.
And it doesn't escape my attention that the men have this problem as well- Wyll and Davrin* are both regarded as boring by their respective fandoms due to the choice to play it safe and stick with the extremely good and upright and just knight character instead of giving them something more messy- Astarion and Lucanis could be black with, as said, little-to-no change in their storyline because I know-even have dated- pansexual former sex worker black men with intensely complicated feelings about sex and intimacy, and I've had plenty of ex-con soft yet dangerous men holding themselves at a distance to prevent themselves from hurting anyone as my friends and even extended family.
I know plenty of intensely nerdy and probably autistic black guys who will infodump gladly about their special interest to the point of it consuming them. I know plenty of black guys with martyr complexes who think they have to tear the world- and themselves- apart just to fix what is broken in this world. I know plenty of black guys who, despite their own inability to get their shit together, are like a port in a storm every time you talk to them. I know plenty of black guys who are extremely educated and well respected within their field, with gentle yet commanding demeanor. Any of these characters *could* be black, and yet they aren't, and the choice to do so is again far bigger than Bioware and Larian.
*Davrin, like Vivienne, being the darkest and first blatantly black male companion instead of potentially able to be ambiguously "of color" like Zevran, Fenris, and Dorian. Even more damning that they'd considered, like Sera, making Solas blatantly black in his concept art and instead chose to make him a pale egg.
As someone desperate for representation, it becomes quickly obvious as I take inventory of what roles black people are given that we still aren't considered as complex and nuanced and interesting. We're allowed to be more than we were before, but we still have a long way to go.
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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago
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... how am I meant to get any sort of restful sleep when it's like 85F indoors in my bedroom at NIGHT .. hhhhhhhhhhhhhh
#why the next poll adventure and everything else has taken so long lol.. I straight up have just not done anything#the past few days... staring down my todo list and sweating hopelessly#AT LEAST it;s relatively low humidity. the highest it's been up to is maybe 65%. but is usually around 50 or 40ish#There is one small window air conditioner in a roomate's room that can KIND OF be shared by nailing a sheet up to block off the hallway#with the rooms in it so the cool air goes into the other bedrooms but doesnt flow out into the kitchen or etc but#wjhen it's the time of day that the sun is directly hitting the window & it's like 102F outside even that doesnt help much. to cool 3 rooms#and I always feel like we're going to explode the air conditioner or something running it too much with direct heat on it. sometimes it#smells like hot plastic or whatever ghj.. so it's mostly just.. block off all windows with 5 layers of blankets and cardboard#starting at 10am (meaning.. no indoor light for days basically.. no natural lighting.. time passes weird. hard to determine time of day).#throw water on the bed every night so you sleep in wet sheets and keep your clothes and hair wet at all times. ice. cold drinks. keep a#little fan running pointed directly at you nearly 24/7 even when sleeping with a fan blowing air on you makes your eyes and throat painfull#dry. etc. etc.. and i KNOW people have it worse in plenty of places blah blah. i am just complaining on my little blog that is about me lol#I think the biggest thing about lack of adequate/central air conditioning for me is just the LACK of productivity!!! I am working on games!#and novels!! and so many other crafts. costumes! sculptures!!! things I want to do!!! we all have a limited amount of time on this planet a#nd I have so many goals!! To lose basically 4-5 days straight or producivity - when if I had been able to temperature#control my environment better I could have easily gotten more done because I wouldn't be laying around nuseous and too hot#and sick to do anything all day etc. -- is like.... GRRRRRR... it just feels so senseless.. i could have USEd that time...#Every CEO who has contributed to global warming owes me 1million doallrs to fund my art projects and make up for all the time#I've lost on them due to their stupid bullshit.. also they should be stoned to death in a public square. but redistribute the money FIRST#to everyone on the planet. but especially people who have been affected by floods. fires. etc. etc.#poor people who have limited choice in housing and access to air conditioning. homeless people in cooling centers. people with disabillitie#and health issues that are worse in the heat so the entire future just seems increasingly terrifying for them. etc. etc.#ANYWAY.... eughhhgh.... It can cool down SLIGHTLY at night but the past few nights I have been sleeping in an 81 degree room and I wake up#and first thing in the morning its like 82 by then and I'm so nauseous and nasty feeling... just so so tired of it.. I NEED SNOW#literally not even joking.. snow would heal me. .. oughffff...#AND i got the new nasty stinky poo poo pee pee tumblr dashboard update lol.. e v i l
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shadowkoo · 3 months ago
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Oh Brother
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→ Summary: Things are bound to get messy when you fuck your brother’s best friend repeatedly. Better not get caught, for both of your sakes.
↠ jungkook x f.reader | 1.8k words | 18+ ↠ genre: smut, brother’s best friend, college au, pwp
→ Warnings: explicit and unprotected sex, dirty bathroom quickie, flashbacks to hooking up the night before, koo fucks you hard from behind, riding on his fingers, sloppy handjob, i think that’s it but let me know if i missed any!!
→ Author Note: soooooo part 2 coming soon 👀 what do we think?
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“You didn’t say Jungkook was coming,” you say nervously after noticing him with the rest of your friend group at the bar. Fuck.
Your brother gives you a weird look, “Since when is that an issue? You’ve always gotten along with ‘Kook.”
You attempt to relax your shoulders and do your best to look as innocent as possible.
“Did something happen? Did he do something to you?” Jaemin quizzes you, failing to hide his ‘concerned brother’ act.
“No…Of course not!” Phantom kisses on your neck remind you that your statement couldn’t be farther from the truth. Jungkook did more than something to you last night, the faint bruises on your inner thighs and the soreness you feel today prove just how much he did…
Unsurprisingly, Jungkook immediately notices that his best friend has arrived with his ‘off-limits’ sister. Though you weren’t so off-limits last night…
Holding your stare, his lip curls up just the slightest into a very familiar smirk, one that he knows happens to drive you crazy.
“Hey man, we missed you last night,” Jaemin says, going in for the typical half-hug all guys do for whatever reason.
“Bro, no you didn’t,” Jungkook jokes, “You might’ve had an actual chance with the ladies since I took off so soon.”
“Fuck you,” Jaemin laughs, “I’m gonna grab a drink, you guys want anything?”
Jungkook lifts the beer bottle in his hand, “I’m good.”
“Same here, I’ll grab one when I’m, uh… ready.” Jungkook hasn’t stopped looking at you yet, causing you to stumble over your words.
Jaemin squints at the two of you, “You’re both acting so weird today.”
Jungkook tenses beside you, his body going stiff for just a moment, but his expression remains unreadable, refusing to spill any of the secrets swirling beneath the surface. It's as if he's mastered the art of control, locking away whatever turmoil or guilt threatens to slip through. Yet, the subtle clench of his jaw and the tightness in his posture tell you there’s more simmering just beneath his calm exterior.
“Kinda feels like an off-day,” he says, trying to play it cool. “Remind me to stick the next party out, will you?”
Jaemin’s normal smile returns. “Yeah because we both know how well you listen to me. I’ll be back in a bit. Relax, have some fun,” he says to you, knowing that you’ll try to find an empty corner to claim as your own sooner rather than later.
“So what then,” Jungkook starts when your brother is just out of earshot, “Are we going to pretend that last night never happened?”
“Wouldn’t that be the smart thing to do?”
“No.”
“No?” You’re surprised at his answer.
He pulls you aside, out of the eye of everyone you know, and kisses you hard. “Are you sure that’s what you want?” You don’t answer so he kisses you again, this time his tongue lingers on yours.
“Is that what you want?” he says after pulling back.
“No,” you breathe.
“Then tell me,” he urges, pushing you up against the wall, “What is it that you want, Y/N?”
You’re the one that pulls him in for another gut-twisting kiss this time. But it’s short-lived.
“What do you want,” he urges again, his hands gripping your sides causing your insides to melt all over.
“I want this,” you whine, running your hand over the front of his jeans, feeling his length pressing hard against the ungiving material, “I want you.”
“I could get used to hearing that,” he growls in your ear as he pulls you towards the bathroom that’s just around the corner.
His words trigger an instant flashback to last night, pulling you back to the moments that still cling to your mind. The thick tension, the rushing adrenaline, the way everything had unraveled so quickly—it all comes rushing back. 
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Jungkook’s rough fingers tease your opening, gliding across your warmth with ease.
“Mmm. I could get used to this,” he smirks, enjoying the pleasure painted on your face as you lay sprawled out on your bed.
He hasn’t got a clue how he ended up this lucky. Just a few minutes ago he was hiding from a one-night-stand gone wrong, and now here he is, doing the unimaginable with his best friend’s little sister.
Though you aren’t so ‘little’ anymore, college has made sure of that.
Gone are the awkward haircuts, the childish features, and the gangly limbs that once defined you. In their place stands someone entirely transformed—sharp cheekbones, full lips (that are gorgeously parted right now), and an air of quiet confidence that wasn’t there before.
Your eyes, once wide with innocence, now hold a depth and intensity that speak of naughty experiences; experiences that now define a certain sparkle he discovers once he curls his fingers inside of you.
“Well don’t. This isn’t going to end well. You and I both know it,” you pant as his lips trail lower and lower along your bare chest until he’s hovering above your hardening nipples.
This is such a bad idea…
“Does that matter?” He questions, his hot breath tickling your skin.
“Shouldn’t it?” You lean up on your elbows to look at him.
He pulls back to return your gaze, “It’s not like anyone has to know. Are you going to tell?” His voice is low, almost a whisper, daring you to break the silence hanging between you. The weight of his question lingers in the air, thick with the unspoken consequences.
You shake your head, but it feels like more than just an answer—it’s a surrender. No, you’re not going to tell. You can’t. The secret is now yours to keep forever, whatever happens tonight is just between the two of you.
“Exactly, so can we continue?”
This time, you nod, a hint of mischief curling at the edges of your lips. What’s the harm in indulging in a little secret fun? The thrill of keeping something just for yourselves sends a rush through you, making the moment feel even more electrifying.
There’s a rebellious allure in the secrecy, a temptation in knowing no one else has to find out. Your pulse quickens at the thought, excitement mingling with the danger of being caught, but you push that aside. 
Right now, it feels too good to care.
He gently lifts a hand to cup your cheek, his touch warm and tender. His lips brush against yours in a soft, fleeting kiss that lingers just long enough to stir something inside you. But then it deepens, growing more intense, his hand sliding to the back of your neck as the kiss intensifies. The fluttering in your stomach turns into a full rush of adrenaline, making your pulse race as you lean into him, lost in the moment.
“Wait,” you say in between his kisses, “Won’t they miss you down at the party?”
Jungkook chuckles as he pulls back once again, “They think I left to avoid Raina. And yes, before you ask, I’ll sneak out after. Now do you want to keep going, or should I leave now?”
“Don’t you dare leave,” you say, pulling him into another quick kiss, “I want this. I want you.”
Jungkook works his way back down your body, leaving warm kisses on your breasts, down your stomach, only to stop just above the waistband of your panties. His fingers slide underneath the fabric and linger where they once were. He looks up at you for permission to touch you again, which you quickly grant in need of feeling him feeling you.
You reach for him as his fingers dip into you, stretching you for what is to come. Jungkook hisses as your cold hand slips into his boxers, tugging on his half-hard length. Your lips move to his neck when he adds another finger inside of you, your head feeling fuzzy from the growing knot in your stomach. His mouth presses hard against yours as he flips you over so you’re on top of his hips. The perfect position for you to grind into his quickening fingers.
“Take this off,” he whispers, pulling at the back of your bra until it unhooks. Once rid of the lacy piece, he moves to your panties. Stripping off your final layers of clothing, you bare yourselves before climbing back into each other’s arms.
Jungkook’s kisses turn lazy as your body moves along on his girth, his breath catching in the back of his throat at how wonderful your wet center feels against his hardening length. Perching above him, you align yourselves before lowering slowly onto him.
The deep groan that leaves his lips could have been enough to send you over the edge just then. Especially as his arms encircle around your back while you bounce on him, throwing your head back at how good this feels, despite how bad it is that you’re fucking your brother’s best friend. 
None of that matters right now.
Jungkook flips you over and lifts your ass in the air so he can take you from behind. You have zero complaints. Clenching around his thick, throbbing member, your inner walls pulsate with each deep thrust. 
“Oh my god, Jungkook,” you pant, “Right there, please. Right there!”
His member stretches your insides as he continues to pound into you from behind, filling you in the best way possible, expanding parts of you that you didn’t know could. His thrusts meet you with perfect precision and accuracy, bringing you so close to that edge again.
One of his hands wraps around your front, and the small circles he rubs in between your legs are exactly what you need. The coil snaps, sending you over the edge and into a spiral of hot pleasure, Jungkook following right behind you.
You lay there catching your breath while listening to each other’s beating hearts, ignoring the sounds of the party lingering on outside your bedroom door as you drift into a well-needed sleep. Tomorrow you can deal with the whole brother’s best friend thing.
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The recent memory fades as you’re brought back to the present where Jungkook has you in a small, and probably hazardous, dingy bar bathroom. His lips replace the phantom kisses you felt earlier as he lifts you onto the sink counter.
“Hurry,” you whine while quickly undoing his jeans, silently praying that none of your friends notice the sudden absence of you and him. Hoping the shadows and noise of the crowd will keep your escape unnoticed. The last thing you need is for anyone to start asking questions, or worse, to catch on to what’s happening.
You prepare yourself for the good time you know is coming, and grip the sink tightly so you don’t crash into the mirror behind you from his powerful thrusts.
The bathroom door opens suddenly, and a pissed-off-looking Jaemin is standing there. His eyes drift to you sitting on the bathroom sink with your dress hiked up, then to Jungkook, standing in between your open, exposed legs, with his jeans loosened around his waist.
Jaemin’s face flushes crimson, the fury unmistakable as his eyes lock onto the scene unfolding before him. His fists clench at his sides, every muscle in his body tensing with barely contained rage. 
Across from him, Jungkook lets out a nervous laugh, the tension crackling in the air around them.
“Oh brother….”
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©shadowkoo 2024. All rights reserved.
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mythicalcoolkid · 2 years ago
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I love the "glasses are disability" thing because it applies to basically every complaint abled people have about disability
"You're not even that bad, why would you get that?" Have you ever used a magnifying glass for small details or zoomed in on a picture
"Why do you have that accommodation TODAY?" Why do you wear reading glasses when you're reading
"It seems like your 'needs' are inconsistent." Yeah and you wear sunglasses when it's sunny and not all the time
"But you can technically walk without that." Yeah and if I put the page really close to your face you could read it, it would just hurt and be hugely impractical, inconvenient, and limiting
"But you COULD go without it all the time, you don't NEED it to live." And maybe you could technically see without your glasses, doesn't mean it's comfortable or practical day to day
"If you REALLY had a hard time seeing you would have glasses." Have you ever known someone who couldn't afford a new pair of glasses? Or eye appointments? Someone who needed vision therapy or special prism glasses? Someone whose vision only gets bad during migraines or seizures? Someone with astigmatism that glasses can't help? Someone who didn't qualify for LASIK?
"You only use it when you're out in public." Have you ever gotten up to use the bathroom at night without putting on your glasses
"Decorating it is just trying to get attention, and it's a medical device so stop glamorizing it." Do you hate any patterned or colorful glasses frames too? Art with characters who wear glasses? People who make OCs with glasses? Glasses chains, prescription sunglasses, aesthetic fake glasses with tinted lenses?
"There are secretly lots of people just using aids for fun and attention." There are secretly lots of people wearing fake glasses or colored contacts for fun and attention, it does not affect you
"We need to find fakers, they're stealing disabled resources!" Someone pretending to need glasses is "taking" a seat in the front from someone who might need it more. That sucks and they shouldn't do that. But I'm not going to scrutinize every person who wears glasses to see if I think they really need that seat. You personally are not the arbiter of who is (based on the random times you've seen them) secretly not disabled
"My friend has that and doesn't act like that." Does every pair of glasses in production, or even every pair close to your prescription, work for you? Is your vision identical to every other nearsighted person?
"If you can do X why can't you do Y? Some people with that can do Y."/"But if you have that how can you do X? People with that can't usually do X." Some people are nearsighted and some people are farsighted and some people are both. Some farsighted people can read some without glasses and some can't. And good distance vision doesn't mean you don't ever need glasses, it's just an entirely different reason you'd need glasses
"You're too young to need that." And there are young people who need bifocal lenses
"Why don't you use this DIFFERENT aid though, it would look like you didn't even have an aid." Why doesn't everyone in the world wear contacts
"Why can't I/my friend/my kid play with it?" Do you let random strangers and children try on your glasses at the grocery store
"I was just trying to help, I thought you'd need a push/you were in the way." Are you cool with me suddenly pulling your glasses off your face to clean them, or because the glare was distracting me
"You'll eventually stop using it though right?" Are you planning on no longer needing glasses someday
Disabled people are free to add
I am aware this is not a 1-to-1 perfectly accurate post. Do not come into the notes trying to "um actually this isn't a perfect comparison." I know. Just don't
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