#because I thought it looked kinda weird
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I want to give you your grin So tell me you can't bear a room that I'm not in — ↺
#hello yes it's me again#but my ideas have officially run out thank you so much#don't wanna put sadness in this one cuz the last one was sad enough lol#I've been avoiding finishing this so it took me a whole week#because I thought it looked kinda weird#well it still does but i just can't put my finger on what the problem is#anyway#band of brothers#george luz#joe toye#luztoye#bobedit
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A belief in Nominative Determinsim
#mira & isa sitting at the other side of the room: oh that cannot be a healthy rationalisation. someone should deconstruct that QUICKLY...#change's strongest soldiers VERSUS one guy echo chambering themselves about a susperstition-based retributive model of the world. GO!!!#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#sloops#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#hey look now. this is softer than usual isnt it? ignore the. ignore the subtle damnation of blame unto the self. its fine. theyre fine#this is in fact a slight adaptation of that headcanon of mine i linked! yep! turns out the way to comic-ise it was to. make it like#90% speech bubble and get kinda weird with the formatting. it's clunky and experimental but hey. im experimenting.#the next ones gonna have even more fucking speech bubbles if it goes how im planning. christ#then its gonna get followed up with something wordless so. all things in perfect balance.#DISCLAIMER: i like to write loop and siffrin displaying the maybe not so great logic-holes their seeming fear of 'retribution for not#sticking to (the script) what the universe intends for them' entails. i do not agree with their weird philosophising.#i in fact think this is . bad for them. and am exploring how fucking unhealthy their mindset seems to be even when 'mundane'#OCD siffrin real as hell whats with the doing arbitrary actions in specific ways lest Something Nebulously Bad Happen little dude?#anyway if you caught the extremely blunt symbolism of kissing a hand with a knife in it you win a prize! it's called self-satisfaction 🎉🎉#hmm. do people realise i kept calling this type of back and forth between siffrin and loop a socratic dialogue bc socrates was also just#arguing with himself? like he was just making up the other guys. complete thought experiment. i also call them that because theyre WORDY!!!
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me: finally accepting theres a good chance im autistic and starting to work up the courage to ask my parents to see if i could get a diagnoses but being scared to
my mom: do you ever think you have adhd? if you want to do a screening for add next time your at the doctors you can
me:
#for context im terrified of being the person who sees stuff online and diagnosis themselves and then is wrong#which is why it took me so long to accept im —probably— autistic (bc now i have done research and stuff for it)#and id see adhd things that were relatable but i felt i related more to the autism + self diagnosing both felt weird (for me not in general#but now like. my mom is willing to accept i might have add??#(there was a long talk in between her asking if i ever thought i had it and her saying i could get a screening where we both agreed that#—if i did have it— i didnt have the hyperactive part. hence the add vs adhd thing)#and now that kinda through off my plans because like. what if i do also had adhd. or something#so yeah small crisis woo#i need to actually look i to symptoms and stuff for adhd though#because im not saying anything til i know more about it and if i actually do have a lot of the things#but this also gives me a chance go write about the autism things as well bc i told my mom i would look into the adhd#so now i can hopefully find a way to bring that up#ive mentioned that autism is a spectrum recently which i didnt think she knew before#so progress i guess#wow long rant in the tags whoops#jasper’s posts#moots have some jaz lore i guess
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[asmr boyfriend voice] woof woof bark bark
#hermitaday#rendog#rendog fanart#hermitblr#hermitcraft fanart#ren#my art#did i ever tell you guys me getting mcyt at all was because i watched lizzies last life pov late at night while i was sick#and ren just. stole my heart#i knew nothing about him or hermitcraft at a time i was just like this guy is so fucking weird. i need to know more#and when i searched him up the first thing i got was the inappropriate compilation#really good first impression. never recovered from it#so yeah my mental state currently is rendogs fault#anyway ive always kinda had trouble drawing him. had to pull up alot of references for this one but i think this is the happiest ive been#-with his design.#idk what it is. i think it's partially because rens got a very model like face irl and im intimidated. guy could be selling watches.#the beard + glasses combo also messes with me i think#he always looks so accursed before i slap the facial hair on him#uhhh i don't think i have any other thoughts to say. good boy good boy goodboy good boy good boy#i might make a postmortem on hadm later on rn im tired. would be fun i think. id get to finish my scrapbook
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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I feel because of Jinx and Viktor’s popularity in fandom (having some of the most annoying fans in Arcane fandom) and the attention they receive in the show itself, people forget/don’t realise how bad they were done by the writers in s2
#saying this as someone who had thought jayce was reasonable for killing viktor in s2#the way they stripped all nuance from viktor’s actions and made jayce 100% right and the arcane/glorious evolution instead of highly flawed#and morally dubious/neutral#into just bad and wrong(tm)#was weird. it was weird.#i don’t want to compare to league because i do think adaptations should be judged on themselves for the most part#and i’m not too familiar.#but i think the ending should have been left open. like let piltover and zaun still be at war and the characters finding their place in that#also escalation from misguidedly transforming unwitting but willing people to viktor just deciding to turn everyone into an emotionless robo#was weird too#someone smarter than me do a deep dive idek#everyone became a centrist when faced with the true enemy; extremist zaunite (but like not even for zaun)#its not that i wanted viktor to be innocent. his actions in act 2 were morally dubious and he was destined to become darker and more extreme#but the way they did it was weird#and the way they resolved his character. it just feel so half-assed if you look past how emotionally charged and beautiful it was#do not even get me started on jinx… the ‘jinx is alive’ theory better be real because that’s the only way to salvage her character#but like i think they handled her character terribly for all of act 3#i think ekko and mel were done dirty in the way characters like lucas in st were. but i won’t get into that rn#jayce and vi also kinda felt reduced to their relationships…#arcane s2 act 3#arcane critical#arcane criticism#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane s2#viktor arcane#viktor#jinx arcane#jinx
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bored
#milgram#milgram fanart#mikoto kayano#shidou kirisaki#kazui mukuhara#yuno kashiki#why did they give mikoto a skateboard tho#kazui look slike kafka from kaiju no 8#in a way. i think#maybe that's why i don't actually mind his fit as much#i'm glad they didn't make kazui super skinny#i like it when he actually got some meat on his bones#i wish it was a little more tho#i always cry when i remember kazui is skinnier than i thought he was... his t1 sprite is so deceiving#i love yuno's and amane's a lot#shidou makes me sad tho there's nothing interesting about it sigh#ig the jacket is kinda cool cuz it's a coat instead of a cape or whatever and the collar is nice#but c'mon they even reused his first aid kit#at the very least i'm glad we got some milgram content tho#anything to quench my thirst#poking straws in their heads and sipping on them like caprisuns#nyways shidou using kazui's weird screen thing to watch cat vids because he is a lsoer and they're both losers#i'm so tired GYOD#uhmrgmrmmrm yeah idk what else to say lol#have a wonderful day or night if you're reading this#chibi's art/rkgk
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I think a really underrated character duo in gravity falls is Dipper and Stan. Like one, I think they are way more similar than people give them credit for. Like Dipper is definitely the one who feels like the ‘inferior’ twin (internally on his part), something reflected in Stan. Also Dipper is generally pretty cunning and willing to throw punches in a Stan-way, you can see Stan rubbing off on him as the show progresses. Dipper in the Stan costume, and that one scene where Stan and Dipper both cross their fingers at the same time for the same promise, both live in my head rent free. In my heart of hearts I think Dipper picks up a bit of Stans con-man tricks in the future (and Mabel goes on some bonding missions w/ Ford, but this post isn’t abt them). Also I just want to say I bet Dipper reminded Stan of a young Ford and that informed some of their early dynamic. Anyway bye just needed this brainworm out
#gravity falls#dipper pines#Stan pines#stanley pines#That one scene in Dreascapers where Stan talks abt how he sees himself in Dipper and that’s why he’s hard on him?#yeah#look the twins can obviously be put into their easy Mabel-Stan Dipper-Ford parallels#BUT I think it’s interesting to do it teh other way too#because Mabel and Ford are the weird twins of their pairs!!! they’re the outcasts who get picked on for being strange!#Also while I don’t think Mabel is Selfish (I love Mabel) she can be a little self-centered which is a good parallel to Ford who#is also kinda self centered#again I say this with love- Mabel did nothing wrong#similarly- Dipper can be mapped to the ‘Screw up twin’ (in his mind) the way Stan can#Dipper is a nerd but he’s not a super-genius like Ford was- so next to mabel he feels inferior#(I feel like he said something like this somewhere? the journal?)#anyway Stan is the same way#Also the way Dipper would fuck anyone up for hurting his family- even going as far to THREATEN bill in BOB#Tbf mabel does this too but it’s way less serious#anyway have this#gravity falls dipper#gravity falls stanley#wait I’m not over this actually#Mabel getting tricked by Bill pretending to be someone she trusted can be a Ford paralell actually#you know how bill sees himself in Ford despite the fact he’s WAYYY more like Stan??? that but mabel the opposite way. do you see the vision?#also the fact the two pines bill hates are Dipper and Stan. I win again#THE BILL-MABEL-FORD PARALELLE BUBBLE MIGHT NEED ITS OWN POST BC I HAVE THOUGHTS
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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#no he does not have tusks I thought they looked cool and that’s it#he does have skull markings tho i just didn’t show them because he’s kinda weird to draw#so I don’t draw him as often#art#fanart#my art#original art#Splatoon#Splatoon art#Splatoon fanart#Splatoon fan art#Splatoon au#Splatoon metal au#Splatoon deep cut au#splatoon big man#big man Splatoon#big man#mantaro#big man fanart
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Rewatching act 2.... yeah ISHA WATCH OUT FOR THE CYCLE ISHA!!!!! NOOOOO
#ambessa setting up the logs on a fireplace while literally adding fuel to the fire with cailtyn... subtelty#silco spent his whole life trying to rile the undercity together STUPID JOKE THAT IT IS you have the chance to pull it off#isha is the true revolutionary after all... jinx get up to her level#was jinx scared of having hallucinations when the girl she released was gonna touch her shoulder??? and then she didn't#what i find really funny is that warwick knows how to use elevators and that funicular to the prison#also there is a lot of blood when he appears in the prison.... it was surprising#vander recognizing jinx with the name of powder after she complained about it eariler its just crazy crazy crazy#people commenting that its unrealistic how caitlyn bests vi when they meet in episode 6 as if there wasn't a montage about how she lost her#edge because of alcohol and living like shit.... she's not like jinx lmao....#rewatching so recently is so weird i imagine it is as close as being dr manhattan as i can get it is literally happening all at once#also the people of piltover are so dumb... lets let the government implement martial law and put this 20 something with 0 political#experience on charge with the army of this outsider agent. alright. i can tell you guys dont vote in this oligarchy you know fuck all#well i guess in that case it isnt the people of piltovers fault... just the important families that contribute in this oligarchy...#putting count fagula in charge.... salo is speciallt dumb but we all knew that#katie leung needs awards btw.... and interviews#“do not test this or you will yearn for caitlyn's dungeons” be careful singed my friend vi fell for that and look at her... her dungeons...#vander reaching for isha not jinx.... OR VI.... she just stopped him#“hes gonna kill you” and vi fighting vander to protect jinx.... yeah#and then she trusts jinx and the beast turns into vander... he serves as a recognizing tool for their true selves...#their mom being so worried about how to name vi and then names the second one POWDER kahdksjsk never not funny... also the barber of zaun#when vi joins with jayce she unlocks this loser flop aspect of her mother's inheritance.... two losers joining to maximize their joint flop#also vander kinda giving up this promise to protect the girls instead of bettering zaun... how it puts him in a standstill bc it's either or#like damn there is nothing as undoing as a daughter for reals. she didnt experience that bc she died so now vander has to and here we are#episide 6 starts with the end of the episode when viktor drops that metal piece..... hello..... is this anything#“do you think this place could work” underground utopia.... DYNASTIES AND DYSTOPIA FEAR IS NEVER AN OPTION SO DYING'S NOT A REAL PROBLEM#didnt ambessa suspect anything when they spent loke a full minite staring at each other 😭😭 she's lost her edge...#just like when she clocked sevika but not jinx... when there's a strong butch in the area her radar gets jammed up#and caitlyn leaving her weapon behind... ambessa thought she was gonna fistfight warwick or something#the metal thing falling when viktor dies repeats THREE TIMES WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#watching arcane season 2
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my hopes and dreams for the graham and flint makeship in game items (to be released next year allegedly) include graham’s ugly bike helmet and flint’s bass so that there is balance in the world… you, too, can own firesetter’s hats and instruments in game
#ttcc#adam chatting#i want there to be BALANCE between them dammit#and so also we don’t have to use flint’s hat anymore for like. His Item#because we always use graham’s guitar yk#and i mean we COULD use flint’s firestoker it jusr kinda looks weird on its own#just a thought i had
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GOT SILLY ON MS PAINT AGAIN!!
This time featuring a comparison of my first 3 Splatoon OC's original designs from 2017- to their current designs as of 2024 !!
They've certainly been through a lot, both character design and backstory wise !! But I'm happy to see my growth as an artist :>
Myehehe, bonus alternate version!!!
So I didn't actually have a reference for the yellow inkling, but I'm pretty sure I remember making an inkling like this unnamed one before actually designing Kailani.
Can't say for certain though, so it's just speculation that I'm gonna believe!
ANYWAY. Spooky Ash art from 2017 jumpscare !?
Yeah I. blurred out a lot of what was on it- It's embarrassing okay 💀💀 (Yippie yay on seeing how much I've developed my art skills over the years tho !!)
But there's the reference I used to redraw my squiddos' old designs !! Don't mind the old version of my Splatsona in the top left LMAO
#everything aside fun fact abt Jason's hair- It's supposed to be the dark navy-blue ink that's found in Splatoon 1's ranked matches!!#namely because when I first made him I was like 'he's gonna be a super edgy and skilled player . and people who play ranked are scary' LMAO#also we are. NOT questioning why Connor used to have wolf ears . (was very interested in hybrid species considering Splatoon lore) ermm#anyway silly how Kailani kinda stayed the same- but I wanna point out that in her old design . the weird gray tentacles were supposed#to change color based on her mood- obviously removed it now tho cuz I thought it looked weird but yea !! old splat design lore moment#splatoon#splatoon oc#splatoon fanart#art#fanart#digital art
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can’t think about shou and mob anymore they make me too ill!!
#it’s very important to me that shou is kind of Weird abt mob after wd arc (and again after confession arc)#not a bad weird. just like. idk#part of the reason he formed such a fast friendship with ritsu was because of their similar experiences!#but then he properly meets mob in world domination arc and promptly gets his worldview rocked multiple times in a row#he’d thought mob was like toichirou! (or like. knew he wasn’t but that was the lens shou was looking with)#and then mob saved him and in the process screwed up shou’s mental categorization for him#so then afterwards i think shou just kinda gets Weird with him
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What if just this once, things worked out?
#I thought the English looked kinda stupid and it’s a Korean game so whatever#I know the anti-ai overlays prob don’t even work but I really like how they look sooooo#gonna keep doing it#fighting for my life with the lighting. I was trying to make sea fairy look kinda translucent bc she’s. made of water.#but I think it just makes her look weird + white#btw took some creative liberties with moonlight’s dress idek if it looks good but whatever#you will NEVER catch me drawing moonlight with her canon jaundiced ass banana yellow skin tone#if I post her with her canon skin file a police report because that’s not me I’ve been replaced#anyway happy independence day I’m not celebrating because I hate this country but it is a holiday#crk#teethart#cookie run kingdom#fanart#artists on tumblr#my art#seamoon#crk fanart#sea fairy x moonlight#sea fairy cookie#sea fairy crk#moonlight cookie#moonlight crk#crob
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So, in an attempt at calming myself down I ended up drawing these two pictures
and now I'm considering taking them with me to the concert tomorrow, but I'm not sure if I really should? I don't think I'll get the chance to give them to Jere and Häärijä and I don't know if they would even want to have them lmao
#käärijä#they are a bit messy looking but still turned out better than i thought they would#considering that i was close to a panic attack while drawing them (especially during chelseas picture lmao)#it kinda helped me calm down but not much lol#i originally only wanted to draw chelsea#because drawing animals is a lot easier for me than drawing people#but then i got struck by some weird burst of motivation and i ended up drawing jere too haha#but yeah i really don't know if i should take them with me or not...#they are rather small (half a A4 page each) so they don't take up much space but hm idk#(also excuse the shitty photo my phones camera is bad lmao)
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