#because I can tell you no matter how annoyed they are with eachother on track

[earth-to-lottie]

i never ever thought I’d say this

i miss the good ole days when all we had to worry about was a landogate after he said something stupid on stream

people are so fucking nasty and i KNOW that he sees it all and that hurts so bad because i know he’s going to agree with and believe everything the trolls are saying because despite that massive ego y’all think he has, he’s his own biggest critic

being a troll and sending death threats, taking 1 line out of context of a whole interview and making shit up about a person you’ve never met says a lot more about you than it EVER will the driver you hate

I wanna wrap him in a blanket and protect him from the world because these people are some of the nastiest vile people on this planet because I guarantee if they were stood infront of him they wouldn’t DARE say half the shit they spew online

no I don’t just support him because he’s hot. no I’m not blinded by being his fan, I’ve called him out when the time has called for it. I’ve been supporting him since he was the lil cutie chronically online boy my age with a sister who does the same sport as me and has a sense of humour to die for and a talent unlike any I’ve seen for a LONG LONG time. I sobbed watching him get his first pole. I sobbed watching him achieve his first win and I will sob WHEN he gets his first WDC. It will come because he is good enough and always has been. It may not be this year but his day is coming. And I will be loudly cheering him on then as I am now because I’m a fan on his good days, yes. But I’m his loudest and biggest fan on his worst days. THAT is what it is to be a part of the LN4 community.

I hope he takes this couple of weeks to have a break from socials, go golfing with max and come back swinging.

[moralchampion]

Your AU idea for Luca keeping his connection to Vale hidden is brilliant. One question, does Alex know or does he find out via the media?

This went down real fast but uhm yeah have my opinion on this 🤠

I feel like he would know. Luca doesn't know how to tell him. He wants to, he really does, but he is probably the only person to have seen both sides of the thing. Marc doesn't mind him, Alex loves him, life is good with them, when it doesn't involve Vale. But one time when Luca was drunk it just slipped out. He was annoyed with Vale, and Alex was there to listen to him complain about how annoying his older brother can be. Luca doesn't remember ever having told Alex, but Alex knows. But he can't bring himself to care too much, and Luca never brings it up, so he never brings it up either. He's not aware that Luca doesn't remember that he told him.

Marc tries not to talk about Vale and tries not to think about him too much, but sometimes he has his little outbursts when something happened and Luca will sit in Marc & Alex's shared motorhome with them while Marc rants about how much he hates Vale and Luca listens to him and wonders to himself what happened between them because no way was it just the on track things.

But he can't bring himself to really care. He doesn't mind how Marc talks of Vale. It's not like Luca adores him in the way every other young rider seems to do.

That's what Marc likes about Luca.

So no, he's probably never going to tell them.

But then the media knows. And in an instant, of course, Marc finds out. He knows before Luca or Alex do (Alex has known for a while lol), and he's furious. It probably happens on a race weekend, so he goes looking for Luca, and where does he find him? On this nice, warm, Italian evening? On the sofa in his own motorhome, cuddling Alex. He starts screaming at Luca, accusing him of only using Alex to get into Marc's head and help Vale out. Luca starts yelling back at him because he would never ever use Alex or hurt him in any way. Why would Marc even think that??

Meanwhile, Alex is sitting on the couch, watching them scream at eachother (Luca has stood up at this point), just taking in how their fight gets louder and bigger. And then he gets up and stands between the two, holds Luca behind himself, and starts yelling back at Marc. This isn't about him. Not everything is always about him. Luca loves him, that's why they're together. Not because Luca wants to use him, especially not to help Vale. If Marc has such a problem with it, he's free to leave and don't talk to Luca anymore, but that also means that Alex won't talk to him until he atleast apologises.

Then Alex decides that they need to be separated, so he pulls Luca outside, and they just make a run for it. Doesn't matter where, just away from Marc. Away from everything they know will be coming Luca's way after that.

They end up on a little hill overlooking the circuit and just flop down on the floor. Luca apologises. Alex doesn't want to hear any of it. Luca is not at fault for who was born related to. That's not Luca meant. He's asking Alex's forgiveness for not having told him that he's related to the Valentino Rossi. Alex looks at him, confusion written across his face. He has told him, does he not remember? Now they just stare at each other, both confused. Then Alex starts laughing. "No way you don't remember!" Luca is perplexed. What should he remember? So Alex tells him about how Luca had told him this before, but it wasn't a big deal so it never came up again. Luca admits that he doesn't remember any of that, was too drunk. They have a good laugh about it.

They're both somewhat scared of going back and facing Marc again, but atleast they have eachother. Like they always will.

[thora-jane]

CAN I REQUEST AGAIN FOR SIRIUS BLACK ANGST ASDGSTAH

I was thinking like the reader got into a fight with sirius, and the fight doesn’t end nicely, the next morning reader need to go into an order mission with sirius, and she saves him from the sectumsempra spell

Take a Beating

Sirius X Reader

(a/n) This is my first time with a Harry Potter request, and also my first time writing for Sirius. This was a really fun request to work with and it was nice to give my brain a different set of characters/world to work in. I hope you enjoy! <3

Warnings: Descriptions of pain and blood, light swearing

Word Count: 2,820

“So does everyone understand the mission?” James asked, looking around the table, “We get in, torch the records, and get out. Simple, easy, we could’ve pulled this shit in fifth year.” It always put you on edge to see him this serious, but you had to remind yourself that sometimes he was serious for his own sake. You knew later tomorrow he’d be back to his joking self, all the guys would. Lilly would go back to rolling her eyes with Remus, Sirius would go back to being a flamboyant flirt, and you would go back to starting your own little troubles and pranks.

‘It always went this way’ is what you reminded yourself. You could hear it now, James and Sirius would come crashing in, cheering and laughing about how stupid Death Eaters were. Lily would giggle, James would scoop her up in a hug and a kiss. Remus would look tired and drained, but relieved, with a smile you loved to see. Dorcas and Marlene would put on some records and bust out the fire whisky. Sirius would probably let his hair down and start flirting with you. You’d roll your eyes. The two of you would never really take it anywhere. Maybe someday you’d actually flirt back just to see his reaction. Or maybe someday you’d flirt back because maybe you wanted to.

“(y/n).” James pulled you out of your thoughts, you looked up to see him and Sirius glance at each other before he continued, “A few of us have decided that it’d actually be best for you to sit this one out. You can stay back here, maybe be on guard if we need back up, but for tomorrow you’ll stay out of the field,” Something was off about the way he was talking, “Right then. Meeting dismissed-”

“Did Dumbledore tell you that?” You asked, not letting him end the meeting.

“Well…no…” James’s calm and cool demeanor faltered, he seemed nervous.

“Moody?” you quirked an eyebrow, “Surely Moody wouldn’t care about that-”

“Not Moody, no,” he looked down at the table.

“Then why can’t I go?” You asked. You didn’t mean to sound annoyed, but you couldn’t exactly help it.

“Because this mission is to destroy muggle-born records. We’re burning them to make it harder for them to track,” Sirius spoke instead of James, “These records have your name on them, we’d practically be giving you over to them and that doesn’t sound like a very smart idea.”

Remus and Lily looked at eachother. James wouldn’t look up from the table. Marlene and Doras each coughed and looked down at their hands.

“Was this your idea?” You asked Sirius, you had to admit, though you had tried your hardest, some frustration and annoyance seeped into your voice.

“It doesn’t matter, what matters is that we don’t play it stupid,” Sirius’s voice was calm and even, but it didn’t matter, you could feel how strongly he was on the matter.

“When have you ever been about playing it smart, Pads?” You crossed your arms, ignoring Lily, Dorcas, and Marlene as they ducked out of the room.

“Since we’ve been plunged into a war filled with ruthless, murderous biggots.” He spat out the phrase, brows furrowing, “Why do you have a problem with staying safe-”

“Because it’s me they’re trying to kill. It’s people like me and Lilly and I don’t want to stand on the sidelines while others protect me!” It was getting harder and harder to deny that you were yelling, “How come you aren’t making Lily stay back?”

“Lily didn’t have a dangerously close encounter with Bellatrix last month!” Sirius shouted, “Don’t think I haven’t forgotten about how close she was to getting her hands on you! I know her, and if she sees you you’re the only target she’ll have and she won’t stop until you’re tortured to-” He cut himself off, taking a moment to keep his composure, “You’re staying here. We’ll be back here tomorrow.”

James and Remus left the room quietly, but you wouldn’t let Sirius out of your sight, “If you think…If you think that for a second I’m going to let that bitch scare me then you’re wrong. You’re wrong Pads and I won’t let you stop me. You can’t hold me back. We’ve planned this out. Hell, I’ve planned this out-”

“I don’t care!” He had given up on trying to stay calm, “I don’t care how strong you think you are, I won’t let my cousin get her wretched hands on you!” He pounded his hands on the table. A little too harshly, you figured, his rings probably leaving the wood dinged up.

“And I don’t care how bold and protective you’re trying to be! Don’t think I didn’t sign up for this oblivious to the possibility of death! This is bigger than me, Sirius!” You used his name, his actual name. You hardly ever said it out loud, “It’s for the whole world.”

The two of you stood there for a moment in seething silence.

“I’m going to bed,” He muttered, walking past you.

“No you aren’t! Not until-”

“I’m going to bed.” He interrupted you, his voice loud and firm. He refused to look at you as he walked through the doorway, his head turned over his shoulder, but he didn’t look at you, “You should do the same.”

You all went to bed that night, having crashed once again at James’ family house. James and Lily shared a room, Marlene and Dorcas shared another room, Remus and Sirius each took one of the guest rooms, and you volunteered to sleep on the couch.

Though you didn’t really sleep. You didn’t care what Sirius had said, you were going to go with them. That’s what you hated about this stupid, stupid war. You were the one at risk, not only as a member of the Order but also as a muggle born. You were one of the people they were always out trying to kill. It wasn’t like the others, not like Sirius or James, who would be killed with hesitation (it’d be a shame to see pure blood be spilled), but you would be killed without a second thought. You were the scum of the earth You-Know-Who wanted to be wiped clean.

This meant sometimes it felt like the group was walking on eggshells around you and Lily. But Sirius was right, the difference between you and her was the last mission you all went on. You had managed to get Bellatrix cornered, even nearly took her wand before you all had to make your escape. She was crazy, so she’d only be coming after you with an extra sense of vengeance. But you’d be ready.

You’ d have to be.

The next morning was the same as every morning before a mission, if you could even call it morning. You all woke up ready long before the sun came up. It was the best plan for a raid like this; break in while there would be minimal guards and others were sleeping, catch them when they weren’t ready, incinerate the records, then collect part of the ash and dispose of it so no one could recreate any lists from the ashes left behind. You didn’t exactly need seven people to pull it off, but no one ever went off alone.

You all gathered around the table again, dawning your boots, coats, and wand holsters. The others stood in silence, not saying anything about how you were there even after last night. Lily offered you a pity-filled smile as she pulled her hat over her head. Sirius didn’t say anything, but you knew he was digging his nails into the sleeves of his jacket.

“Alright, Dorcas, Marlene and I will burn the records, Lily, Moony, and Padfoot, you all cover us and keep watch. Remember who you’re responsible for-” James began. You dug into him with your stare before he finally gave in, swallowing before adding, “(y/n), you’re with Lils, Moony and Pads.”

Remus put his hand on your shoulder and squeezed, Lily nodded at you. They both understood how passionate you were about this. Hell, they knew you’d take down You-Know-Who himself if you could. But Sirius refused to look at you. His jaw clenched and he looked like was going to claw the sleeves of his jacket to shreds. But he didn’t say anything. No one said anything as you all circled up, joining your hands like you did before every mission.

This mission would be just fine. You’d done this dozens of times.

You noticed Sirius made a point of not standing next to you, so you took Remus and Lily’s hands in yours. You looked over to James, as leader for this mission, he would be the one to apparate, bringing you all with him.

It only took a moment, the seven of you popping into the library of some Death Eater’s mansion. In an instant, you whipped out your wand, knocking out a Death Eater before they could react.

“Right then,” Remus whispered, “We might need to move quicker than we thought.” He silently spelled all your shoes from making noise as you ran through the hallway. You could feel the blood pumping in your ears.

You all wove through the shelves of the library as you heard Dorcas whisper, “Accio records.” James held up his hand, catching it mid-air as it came flying towards you all. It took a while to magic up a fire that dealt permanent damage, but it moved faster with more than one person. The three of them gathered around the stack of papers, whispering incantations as you began to smell smoke. You, Lily, Remus and Sirius circled around them, your backs to theirs with your wands at the ready. Things were going smoothly, you even started to feel things would be over before you knew it.

Then you heard it. A quiet cackle from the other side of the library.

“Did little cousin bring his friends to play?”

You looked over at Lily, eyes wide. You looked back to Sirius, who only gripped his wand tighter.

“C’mon silly little Siri, you don’t want to come out and play?”

She cooed. You could practically hear the pout in her lips and the way she ran the tip of her wand over the spines of the old books lining the shelves, “You did bring your friends, didn’t you? Is your little girlfriend with you? I was so sorry to see her go before we were finished with our last playdate.”

At this, Sirius looked over at you. It wasn’t anger in his eyes, but fear. To your surprise, he reached out for your hand, taking a moment to glance back at James. James looked at him, not saying a word, but shaking his head furiously. This seemed to upset him, and the two of them took a moment in silent conversation filled with nothing but pursed lips, wide eyes, furrowed brows, and violent jerkings of their heads.

“You know I know you’re here, I know you’re all here,” Bellatrix drawled out, her footsteps getting closer. Sirius grabbed your hand and squeezed, looking over at Lily and Remus before nodding. The four of you held your wands at the ready, spells resting just behind your lips.

The footsteps drew closer before stopping, her bubbling laugh seemed to echo all around you, like it was playing through a speaker and not like she was lurking somewhere close by.

“We’re nearly done,” Marlene whispered to you as Dorcas pulled a vial from her bag, gathering ashes.

“What was that?” You heard Bellatrix’s voice echo, “Going so soon?”

Your heart sank. As James gathered ash into his own vial, Lily and Remus moved to stand by their sides and joined hands. You and Sirius however, both stood guard, his hand not letting you go. Though he kept his eyes fixed ahead of him, he ran his thumb along the back of your hand.

She leapt out between the shelves. Her a wild mess, her eyes wide, her dress torn. She threw back her head and let out a cackle before looking you dead in the eye and whispering.

“Boo.”

Sirius didn’t hesitate to start throwing spells at her, and she didn’t hesitate to deflect them.

“You really think I’d fall victim to your itsy bitsy hexes? You know your mother always loved me more,” she rolled her eyes.

“Prongs! Take the others and get out of here!” Sirius shouted over his shoulder.

“No not without you!” James shouted back. But it was too late, Bellatrix brought her wand back, an evil glint in her eye as she prepared to cast a spell. Remus reached out for James' hand and apperated. You and Sirius were left behind.

“Sectumsempra!” She screamed, launching a spell at Sirius.

It was a split second, but time seemed to slow down. You tugged Sirius behind you and threw yourself forward, the spell hit you right in the chest. You couldn’t hear Bellatrix’s squeal of glee, or Sirius screaming your name. All you felt was agony ripping its way across your chest, and the room spinning before you reappeared on the floor of the Potter’s kitchen.

Things felt warm and wet and sticky. Someone screamed, it might have been Lily. Sirius was whispering something, it may have been to you, or maybe it was an incantation. Your eyes began to flutter when he shook you by the shoulders, “Not today, (y/n). Stay with me. Stay with me. Not today.”

“I told you…” you coughed, and you felt something splutter up from your lips. Were you drooling? How embarrassing, “I told you I should go,” You wiped your mouth, deep crimson staining the back of your hand, “That would have gone right at you, Pads.”

“I know, sweetheart,” he whispered, tossing his wand aside as you heard others start whispering things, “I know. You’re so brave. You’re so damn stupid but you’re being so brave for me.” You recognized some of the words in the room; a cleaning spell, a healing spell, but most of all you recognized Sweetheart.

“Awwww, Padfoot! Are you in love with me?” You giggled through the pain, the only thing feeling lighter than your heart was your head. And, though your vision was tunneling, you couldn’t take your eyes off his gorgeous gorgeous face, “You’re pretty, did you know that? Your hair is beautiful, it makes my chest hurt,” you wheezed out, becoming more aware of the pain in your chest, “Pads my chest hurts.”

“I know it does, Love. We’re doing our best.” His smile began to falter as his eyes flitted from you to your body, “Just a little bit longer, things will be all better.”

“Did we do it?” Your voice was weak and you held out your hand to look at it again, red streak drying and feeling crusty, “We did it, right?”

Sirius gripped your hand without a second thought, “Of course we did, darling,” He began to wipe your mouth with a damp rag, “The records are gone, we made it back safe, you’re going to be ok.” He looked up and took something from someone’s hand, “Could you drink this for me, beautiful?” he said, holding a small bottle up to your lips.

You nodded wearily before taking a drink. It was bitter, and you tried your best not to cough it up. It burned the back of your throat as you swallowed, but the pain in your chest subsided, “Pads you can’t kiss me,” you gagged, sitting up more as you came to your senses, “That was bloody awful and-”

You were cut off by two hands in your hair and your lips pressed hard against his. You closed your eyes, hands finding their way to his shoulders to keep you from falling back on the floor. A few pairs of footsteps shuffled out of the room, with a couple of giggles and a groan from Remus.

“I’ll find a way to work around it,” Sirius whispered to your lips with a smile, “Do you feel better?”

You began to look away from his face and down at your body, but his lips caught yours in another kiss before you had the chance, “It’s best if you don’t look, darling. Let’s go find you a change of clothes.”

He scooped you up, letting your head rest on his shoulder, “Is all this just to distract me from what happened, or do you really like me, Sirius Black?” your voice was soft, but tinged with an unmistakable hint of surprise as he walked out of the kitchen.

“Gorgeous, that potion tasted so awful I wouldn't have kissed you if this wasn’t love,” he chuckled before pulling your lips to his again as music began to play in the next room over.

(a/n) Thank you for reading everyone! I didn't know who to tag in this, and hopefully, soon I can get a tagglist form out for people to use. The next school term starts soon, so my stories may have some time in between them, but since I've had more people give me requests, hopefully I can keep writing even if it's shorter stuff. Go drink some water and remember you're loved <3

[kelieah]

can’t help it (arvin russell x reader)

request (summary): @dhtomholland​ : hi !! i have an arvin request... what if arvin easily gets jealous when boys hit on y/n at school or jus try to talk to her and it was cute at first but y/n get annoyed at some point which leads to a small fight but arvin makes it up to her w flowers and telling her he jus wants to protect her 🥺🥺🥺

word count: 1.7k

warnings: language ofc, angst, fluff

edited: i also kinda forgot halfway through writing this that u requested he wanted to protect, i changed that up a bit sorry !!! also why the fuck am is my gifs not loading grrr

a/n: awwee this requesttt,, sorry for the late response. i’m not as quick as i used to be w requests 

main masterlist | arvin russell masterlist

You like Arvin a lot, that’s something you couldn’t deny. But lord, ever since you started dating this boy you don’t think you could ever get used to his temper and overprotective attitude. You appreciated it, of course, it’s just that there were many times when he’d let it get the best of him.

There was this one time he was picking you up from school, but you weren’t at the front like you usually were. So he decides to park and walk to your locker to see if you were there. You’re there, but with the company of someone else. His heart rate spikes at the sight of someone, or to be more specific, some candy-ass boy talking to you. He slowly walks over, not wanting to startle the both of you, and listens in on the conversation.

“I- I could help ya with the homework for math class. If y- you want of course,” the sweet, frail boy whose name is Cole, offers you.

You smile softly and nod while closing your lockers, “I would appreciate that a lot! I think I’m free—”

Before you could even finish your sentence you notice Cole huddle in fear before you. “Hi,” you hear a familiar voice from behind you. He wraps his arms around your waist and places his chin upon your shoulder.

“Oh, hey Arvin,” you murmur softly and glance over at him. You know what he’s up to so you push him off slightly to return to your conversation with the other boy.

“Uhm, h- hello there. A- Arvin,” Cole mutters and cowers underneath Arvin’s piercing glare. 

You huff and shove your boyfriend aside. “Don’t mind him, like I was saying. I think I can after Sunday Mass, by the trees and tables if that’s alright?”

He gulps as he averts his eyes back and forth between the both of you. “Y- Yeah, is that okay?”

“I just said it’s alright—?” you stifle a laugh until you get cut off.

“Yeah, just studying though. If she tells me otherwise, I’ll cut your—'' Arvin threatens, causing every ounce of color from Cole’s face to drain.

“I’ll see you Sunday, Cole! Bye!” you immediately pull Arvin away and squeeze his hand harshly. “What is the matter with you!?”

“What?” he asks cluelessly and looks back at Cole who had already run off in complete fear and embarrassment.

“That poor boy. He’s just asking to study with me, that’s all,” you smack his arm.

He scoffs and shrugs you off. “Doll, I know you’re dull sometimes but c’mon. Every boy in the school probably wants you. Even boys like him, they just got some type of strategy or some shit,” he runs a hand through his hair and avoids your piercing glare. “Dull? First off, fuck you. Second, every boy? Arvin, grow up baby. I’m yours, and only yours. M’ pretty damn sure everyone knows that. Now fucking apologize or else I’m walking home,” you stop in your tracks and cross your arms. 

He stops as well and turns towards you, giving you a blank expression. You remain firm and raise an eyebrow at him, almost testing him to try you. “Sweetcakes, m’ sorry,” he groans and takes a step towards you.

You take a step back and raise both your eyebrows, continuing to stay stubborn. “Sorry, what?”

He takes one more look at you and wavers in defeat. He trudges over to you and falls into your arms, stuffing his face in your neck. You stifle a laugh and hold him up, hugging him close. “I’m sorry for threatening that stupid boy with dumb glasses. I just really like you and don’t want nobody touchin’ my girl. Nobody. Not even God. I’m sorry! I’m sorry. I won’t get jealous or overprotective again,” he drags out his words and whines against your skin.

You throw your head back and giggle. “Arvin! Okay, okay. You big softie. Apology accepted stupid. But, you better apologize to him too, okay?” you push him off you and glance into his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. Kiss?” he pouts and leans towards your face. You roll your eyes and oblige, pecking his lips. You walk off towards his car and he let out another whine, complaining about how the kiss was too short.

You love how you’re able to bring out this vulnerable and softer side to Arvin. You’re lucky enough that he even started dating you. It shock you that the boy had emotions. You’re only partly joking about that. It’s a true miracle the way you make him fall to his knees for you. You both couldn’t get enough of each other. Though, there were days where Arvin really got on your nerves.

He just promised the other day to not get too jealous or overprotective, didn’t he? Yet, here is now cursing out the same boy who helped you with your studies behind the school’s building. “What the fuck do you want with her? Huh? I saw the way you look at her, don’t you lie to me boy damnit!” he raises his voice at Cole.

Cole stumbles back and hits the wall as Arvin holds his collar, “I- I swear it’s nothing like that Arvin! I promise, I’m just helping her out that’s all! W- We’re just classmates, I’d never try to meddle. Please man!” he begins to weep covering his face as Arvin raises his fist.

“Arvin Eugene Russell!” the two boys hear a louder voice from behind them. There you stand with an infuriated expression. Your jaw clenched your face red and your hands on your hips. 

Arvin mutters a handful of curses underneath his breath and lets go of Cole reluctantly. Cole plops down on the floor and hugs his knees to his chest as he watches the argument unravel between you and Arvin.

“Doll, this isn’t what it looks like. I was just lecturing him I swear—” Arvin holds his hands up in defense.

You completely ignore his attempts to redeem himself and brush past him, helping Cole up. “I am so sorry, are you okay?” you ask softly.

He wipes away his tears and nods in response. “Y- Yeah I’m okay, thank you. I should probably go now. I’ve caused enough problems,” he pulls away from your grasp and plays with his hands.

“No, you haven’t caused anything. I think he should go now,” you turn your head towards Arvin and send him a warning glare. He stares at you back in disbelief and clenches his jaw. You both stare at each other for a little longer, as if you were both challenging eachother to see who would back down. Arvin’s the first to crack. He scoffs and turns sharply on his heel, making his way back to his car.

“I- I’m so sorry, Y/n,” Cole bubbles sadly and wipes the sweat beads off his forehead. “I really am.” “Don’t be stupid, you’re fine. It’s my damn boyfriend’s problem, not ours. Come on, let’s go grab some ice cream,” you sigh and walk ahead, leaving him scrambling to catch up with you.

After the nice hangout with your newly made friend, he walked you home and apologized once more which almost made you slap the boy. Though it was calming to spend time with a friend other than your boyfriend, you still couldn’t believe Arvin’s recent behavior. 

You know he can get overprotective, but jealousy is something you never expected. You take your mind off of him once again by doing some homework until your peace is interrupted by the sound of loud knocks on your front door. “I’m coming! Jesus,” you yell frustatingly as the pounding on your poor wood gets louder. You open the door to see Arvin with a guilty expression, a heap of flowers in one hand and a dozen of pop in the other. You raise an eyebrow at him and lean against your doorway.

Your silence pushes him to speak up. “Look, I’m. I- I’m,” he grumbles out and avoids your gaze, staring at the ground.

“I’m?” you decide to poke at him and cross your arms, enjoying the entertainment in front of you.

“I didn’t mean to,” he huffs and holds out the things he brought, looking back at you.

Your face now remains unamused. “Come again?”

“Christ, woman,” he rolls his eyes and lets out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry. I’m fucking sorry I almost beat the kid. I just hated the way his beady little shit eyes were staring at you. I coulda sworn the fucker was going to take you from me. I don’t want anyone to take you from me. I mean I know you’re not mine— No you’re mine, but not in a possessive way or something. I don’t know. I’m trying here, hell. I just, I’m just scared one day you’re gonna find someone better than some ditz like me,” he lets the bottled up feelings spill out his mouth like word vomit.

You look at him surprised and purse your lips, examining his face. He finally makes eye-contact with you and smiles weakly. You stifle a laugh and pull him into a bone-crushing hug that causes him to let out a soft gasp. He places down the flowers and pop, wrapping his arms around you instinctively. “Now you listen here fool, like I’ve said a million times. I’m yours, okay? I know I ain’t your object, and I’m glad you know that too. But nobody is gonna take me from you. Nobody, not even Paul Anka,” you tease quietly, earning a chuckle from him that makes you smile in content. “Wanna know why?”

He presses a warm kiss against your shoulder and sighs, “Why?”

“Cus I love your dumbass,” you murmur into his ear and rub his back comfortingly.

He tenses a bit and smiles happily, stuffing his face in your neck. “I love you too,” he mumbles incoherently into your skin. 

You giggle and run a hand through his hair, massaging his scalp. “Can you promise me not to do anythin’ like that again?”

“No,” he admits and begins to sway your body as he holds you.

You whine breathlessly and pull away to look at him. “Arvin! Why the hell not?”

He grins cheekily and shrugs nonchalantly, “Because I can’t help it.”

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[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Can I have aizawa dating (without knowing) one of his student's (you can chose) older sister? Thank you and stay hydrated! 💗

• It was Bakugous sister.

• He honestly didn't even make the fucking connection. He's just tired.

• You have brown hair, Katsuki has blonde hair. You curse a lot but have a much better control with your temper and youre not as hot headed.

• he didn't connect the resemblance either until he see's you too in the same room

• and he doesn't like bringing work home- especially when he gets to see you

• which isn't as often as he'd like it to be

• so he won't talk about it

• so you wouldn't know that he taught your brother

• he'll say his day was frustrating or it was good and then the subject would be changed

• Your family would know you're seriously dating /someone/

• but they wouldn't know who.

• your dad would know more than your mom would- you're closer with him

• Katsuki would also know youre dating someone, he doesn't know who, and he pretends not to care but he's annoyed he hasn't met them

• he doesn't know what they're like. They could be an asshole- he wouldn't know.

• your relationship with Katsuki is weird.

• some times he's decent- and yall act like normal siblings

• and then sometimes the two of you ignore eachother for months

• which is ridiculous because youre 26 and he's 17.

• you think he has some animosity for leaving the house and leaving him to be the only child there

• now his parents are down his back

• he might also be upset that you disciplined him a lot

• but you also comforted him when he needed it

• regardless he'll still show up at your apartment when he's fought with mom

• or he 'got bored' aka he missed you but he's not gonna say that

• if he didn't feel like spending the night in the dorms, he'd crash at your place.

• Back to the point- they don't know much.

• it's completely unknown to everyone that you're dating your brothers teacher.

• Aizawa is patient. He's so patient.

• you've been hesitant on him meeting your family (though you've been together for what- a year? Year and a half?) Because well...your family is your family.

• you don't want him to dip

• you're utterly in love with this man and you'd be htterly devastated if he left

• and honestly? He's content with how it is now.

• Him occasionally spending the night(s) ((weeks)) at your apartment, leaving work out of conversations and just enjoying company.

• you dont have to go too fast- its fine how it is now.

• he loves you and that's really all that matters to him.

• but one day, you do decide its time for him to meet them.

• it's over winter break- it's December, not long before Christmas, he'd be spending it with you this year and he should meet your family before hand.

• You guys decided breakfast was an appropriate time.

• So there you are, sitting in bed with your greasy gremlin of a man

• he's got a hand in your hair, the other on the bed on the other side of your head to hold him up.

• you were under him, licking the inside of his mouth

• that's as far as you two had gotten before there was a knock on the door.

• you looked towards the clock as he let out a small groan.

• forgive him, it'd been a solid 2 weeks since he'd seen you last and he missed every part of you.

• it was late, around 11:30, none the less you got up, pressing another kiss to his lips "I'll be back in a minute babe,"

• and off you go to answer the door

• and when you do answer you see Katsuki standing there, hands shoved in his pockets, looking very upset.

"Katsu?"

"I got into a fight with mom. Can I sleep here tonight?"

You nod, "yeah yeah, of course. Just text dad that you're here okay?" You step aside to let him in. "Did you walk? Drive?"

"Hung out with Ei and then drove here."

"Car out front?"

"Mhm, parked next to yours."

"Did Ei do a good job making you feel better?" You glance back at him as you take a cup out if the cupboard.

"Yeah, he did. I'm just not in the mood to go back."

"That's okay. We know how mom gets. What was it about?"

"Responsibility or some shit like that. Not exactly sure anymore."

"Katsu," you mumble, sitting a cup if tea in front of him. "You're doing fine. With everything thats going on, you're dealing with it really well. You're still just a kid, you deserve to have some fun." You kiss his forehead and he nods. "I'm gonna make sure the guest bedroom is ready, kay?"

"Kay."

• So once the room is ready, he brings his cup into the room and plugs in his phone before looking at you.

"Is /he/ here?

"Sho? Yeah, he's probably sleeping now. You'll meet him in the morning. Is Ei and his family still spending Christmas dinner with us?"

"Yeah. He is."

"Does he know how crazy we are?"

Katsuki smiles slightly. "Yeah, one of his moms is like that."

"Good, then you have nothing to worry about. Goodnight Katsuki." You ruffle his hair.

"Let the bedbugs bite, hag."

"You too, little fucker."

• Getting back into bed woke Shouta up, though he was only just drifting off.

"Who was that?"

"Brother, he got into a fight with mom. He's spending the night in the guest bedroom so you'll meet him tomorrow."

He nodded. "Can I go back to kiss you now?" He mumbled.

"Yeah, but we have to be quite now." You smile.

"You know thats one of my favorite games," he got back on top of you, moving your legs so they were on either side of his waist and he had easy access to grind himself onto your heat. You let out a sigh and his lips reconnected.

• The next morning you woke up early than you had really wanted but sometimes shit happens.

• katsuki was already up, if course he was.

• he gave you a small nod, eyes traveling to the hickey peeking out from under your robe before looking away. Gross.

• "Sleep okay?"

"Slept fine, you?"

"Mhm," you smile slightly. "Dad say anything last night?"

"He said to tell you goodnight and he was excited to see you tomorrow, but I was too lazy to get up-" his spoon clattered.

You glance back, "Ah, Katsu this is Shou, Sho this is-"

• Katsuki is 😃

• Why are you fucking here???

• Aizawa is 😌

• I'm gonna use this to destroy you

"Jesus-" Katsuki groans. "No- no no-"

Shouta rubs his face, but he's internally jumping- oh he's going to use this to his advantage.

"What-?"

"You're dating my fucking teacher?"

"Wha- oh." You snicker.

• This is gold

• This is absolutely gold

• You are going to beat Aizawa ass later though, he's totally been overworking his class

• They walk into breakfast and your parents are like ????

• "Hey isn't that-?"

"Yes." Bakugou grumbles. "Yes it is."

• Honestly they'd both use it to their advantage.

• "I'll tell my sister if you ____"

• "I'll tell your sister if you don't _____"

• and when y'all get engaged and class 1a finds out that he's going to become bakugous brother in law, they flip their shit dude.

• Because one, Eiji was the only one who knew he had a sister and that he was dating bakugous sisterb

• mans walked in with his famiky to see his boyfriend and stopped dead in his tracks.

"M-Mr. Aizawa..why are- uhm- why are-?"

Bakugou grabs his hand, nodding at his mother's. "He's dating my sister."

"He's what?" He whispered, eyes widening.

"Tragic, I know."

• One time you had to bring him something bc he forgot it at your apartment that was practically his too at this point

• and you walk in

"Hey sho, you forgot this."

"Mm, thanks."

• Bakugou drops his head to the table

"Bye Katsu," you wave and smile. "By Ei, have a good day,"

"Please leave,"

"You too Bakugou!"

• "who was that?" Mina asks

"Bakugous sister,"

"My fiance,"

They said that the same time

• All hell breaks loose

• "The fact that bakugou has a sister is processed first- "she looks nothing like you how-"

"She has my dads brown hair. I have my moms blonde hair.'

• He's bombarded with questions

• he ignores them

• the fact that Aizawa is ENGAGED to bakugous sister- now that's gold

• and he's bombarded with questions too

• no he did not know you were bakugous sister

• he met you after school started

• at a fruit stand actually

• he proposed before Christmas

• yes, he asked for your parents approval

• yes he asked for bakugous approval, he said yes

• no, he didn't have kids

• but y'all did have a cat and a dog

• No Mina, I'm not showing you a picture of them

• because Ayoma, we're in class right now

• maybe after if you guys shut up

• Anyway Bakugou is the ringbearer for the wedding 🤪🤪

• Class 1A is invited

• Mic is the best man

• Your best friend is your maid of honor

• All might officiated it

• its a good time

[maybe-its-micheal]

Like an Orange Spark...

/rp /dsmp

Ghostbur watched as Dream, Tommy, and Techno talked. He was sure he had just known what they were discussing, but now the context seemed to slip through his fingers... he was used to the feeling, though, and shrugged it off. He tried for a few minutes to pay attention, but kept forgetting what everyone was talking about, amd decided to do something else. He turned his back to them, and let his eyes wonder across the snowy landscape.

It was really was a lovely day, the leaves of the spruce trees swayed slightly in the chill breeze, leaving shadows dancing on the ground. A few small bushes peaked up over the snow, dotted with red berries, and the sun sat in the center of the cloudless sky. Ghostbur heard a slight rustle from a near by bush, and spotted a hint of blue from behind it.

"Listen, Techno, you owe me. Im calling in that fav-"

"Friend!" Ghostbur yelled, interrupting whatever it was Dream was on about.

Techno's expression, a mix between anger and concern, shifted to pity as he looked over at the ghost. It was odd seeing the man who he'd once fought alongside like this... he was a capable leader, and a dangerous enemy. But that was in another life...

Tommy was tense, and flinched as Dream snapped his head around to glare at Ghostbur. He grumbled something under his breath before turning back to Technoblade. "Look. I dont want to make this a big thing-" Techno put a hand up to interrupt as he gave Dream a serious look. He turned to Ghostbur, handing him a lead.

"Hey, Ghostbur. Me and Tommy need to talk to Dream, but I saw a patch of blue flowers on the other side of the village. How about you take Friend and see if you can find them?" He asked.

"Ok!" He responded excitedly. Blue was his favorite, he was always looking for more. "You guys have fun!"

He tied the lead to Friend and ran his grey fingers through the soft wool. He turned to go, hearing a few hushed sentences as he walked off.

"He shouldn't have to watch something like this," Technoblade whispered.

Dream scoffed. "Not like he'd remember anyway. But now that he's gone, I want Tommy to..."

And the voices trailed off. Wilbur decided to fill the quiet by talking to friend- that always cheered him up! "Today I've been spending lots of time with Technoblade!" he told the sheep. "We brewed a whole bunch of invisibility potions together, it was lovely. You know, I think they may be his favorite kind of potion, he kept going on about how much he wanted to share them with Tommy." He gave a slight chuckle, then stopped walking. He turned around to look back at the group. "Technoblade seems to really like Tommy. I cant imagine why..." he said with a jokey smile, eyes fixed on Tommy. He was a bit hunched over, still looking at the ground. Every so often he looked up, nervously glancing to Dream with big, glossy eyes, and then looking back down. Ghostbur frowned. "Maybe that was a bit mean to say. I was only joking," he clarified to Friend. "Tommy isn't all bad."

Ghostbur turned back around and kept walking. On his way to the village he got to thinking about Tommy... he could be really annoying, there's no denying that, but he also had a lot of good qualities. He remembered when they were first making L'manburg together; those were good times. Tommy had been very brave, then, and determined too. No matter how grim a situation looked he never seemed to be afraid of Dream, he just kept going. Maybe he was just a naive child, but in the end... the details were fuzzy, but Ghostbur was sure that in the end it was Tommy who did something to secure the future of their nation.

In the quiet he couldn't help but overhear some of the conversation taking place back over the hill. Their voices were getting louder, maybe they were all excited about something. A smile dawned on Ghostbur's face- maybe they'd sent him away because they're planning a surprise party! He stopped walking again, and did his best to listen.

"I am not handing him over to-" Techno's voice yelled.

"... control over... give it to me! Him. Give him to me!" Dream responded.

"You've done enough dam..."

"... never should have trusted..."

"I dont want to kill you."

It was hard to keep track of who was saying what, but it didn't sound much like party planning. Ghostbur went back to walking- he could see the wooden roofs of buildings in the distance, which meant he was getting close to the village.

In all the yelling he wondered why he couldn't hear Tommy's voice. Maybe he just hadn't listened hard enough- that was probably it. Being quiet is quite unlike Tommy, Wilbur thought.

"Come on, Techno... favor... my..."

"I dont want... can't betray him agai..."

"...Im sorry."

"Theseus."

Theseus... he wasn't sure why, but that name lit something up in the back of his mind. It was only there for a moment, like a flickering spark. A memory. Phil had told him and Techno about Theseus when they were kids... it was a bedtime story, he thought. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and shut his eyes, trying to focus on it, and see if he could get the spark to come back. Friend looked at him with a tilted head and bah'ed, as if to ask why they stopped walking.

"... can make a deal..."

"Hand him over... want..."

"I'll never fall for..."

"He's just a kid, Dream. He..."

Wilbur could see the spark in his mind- a little glowing dot of orange bouncing around in an infinite void of grey and blue darkness. Then, all at once, the spark lit up, erupting into a flame that filled his entire mind. Ghostbur jumped backwards with surprise, falling into the snow.

His mind took him back to another time; another life, when he was another person. The war was still going on, the first one with Tommy, Tubbo and Fundy. Eret had already betrayed them.

In his mind, he saw Wilbur- himself- no, Wilbur- standing on the banks of a lake back in Dream SMP territory. An oak path stretched over the water like a bridge, and Dream stood to one side, Tommy on the other. They both held a bow and a few arrows.

Fundy and Tubbo were there with him, and so were George and Sapnap. Everyone was deadly silent, except for Wilbur. He was counting, loud and clear, his voice echoing over the scene.

"...in it for me..."

"...give you... ever want..."

"Fine, its a deal."

"...I'm sorry, Tommy..."

"... Theseus... cliff... the person he took refuge f..."

"...faster."

"... seen it coming."

The talk was drowning out the memory... the firelight was flickering, and peices of the scene were covered with grey darkness and splotches of blue again. Ghostbur was desperate to hold on, he held his head in his hands and pushed his eyes shut tight. "No no no no no," he muttered to himself, hoping for it to stay just a few moments longer. Through the fading light he heard his past self reach the number 10 amd stop counting... Tommy and Dream turned around to face eachother.

"Please, Techno, I dont want to go," Ghostbur heard from back in reality. Tommy's voice was breaking through his memory... it was all falling apart.

"Come on, Tommy. Take off the armor, don't make me do this the hard way," Dream replied.

"I dont want to, Techno. Hes going to kill me, please!"

"I'm not going to kill you if you cooperate. Hurry up," Dream barked.

The memory was almost gone. There was no more Fundy, or Sapnap, or oak path. It was only water as a heap of bubbles disturbed the surface. When they cleared Ghostbur could see Tommy struggling in the water. He was about to reach the air again, but then-

An arrow plunged itself through Tommy's heart, killing him instantly, and it all came flooding back.

He was snapped back to present day, and running back to the three. Friend was left behind in the snow. Dream shot Tommy. That was the memory, how Tommy lost his second life. Dream shot him. "You BASTARD!' He shouted at the top of his lungs as he sprinted back the way he came. "You fucking BASTARD!"

Then the darkness started to come back... Ghostbur balled his hand into a fist. Dream let out a yell... and it all went grey.

Next thing he knew, he was seated with Technoblade in the house. He looked around. "Oooh! You're brewing! Are you making invisibility? Thats your favorite potion," he told the pig. Techno looked up.

"No, its... harming." He replied. "I thought- you know since you're undead it would work kind of like skeletons and zombies."

"Aww, it's for me? Thanks! But why would I need to heal?" He paused, feeling a bit cold. There was a draft- maybe a window was opened upstairs.

"Because-" Techno stopped and looked at the ghost. "Do you not remember?"

Ghostbur paused. "Hmmm... well I know Dream came to visit. And then... something about an arrow? No, that wasn't it... I guess I dont really remember. What happened?"

Technoblade sighed, and set the potion down. "Nothing big. Im just glad youre ok."

Ghostbur laughed, "well yeah! It's not like I could die again!" That draft was getting big- he looked down.

"Oh." He said. There was a massive hole in his yellow sweater, but the grey akin underneath was left unharmed. "How did..?"

"Dont worry about it. Phil is already working on making you a new one, too, by the way. It'll be blue."

Ghostbur gasped. "Oh my god!" He exclaimed with a smile, "thats my favorite color!"

Technoblade chuckled. "I know, Ghostbur. I know."

"I should tell Tommy," the ghost decided. "Where is he?"

Techno's face fell. "He... had to leave."

Ghostbur shrugged. "I don't remember that, when?"

"Just a few minutes ago... he went with Dream."

Ghostbur smiled pleasantly. "Thats nice, they really are such good friends."

"Yeah..." Technoblade replied. "Friends."

[minuteminx]

Revolutionary

Pairing: Preston Garvey/ Female Sole Survivor

Summary: In the aftermath of personal tragedies, Preston and Charlie both seek to make a difference in the Commonwealth and those around them. They could never anticipate the impact that they will have on eachother in the process.

Chapter Five: Old Appalachia

Chapter Summary:  Charlie's not sure she's cut out for the Commonwealth, but fate thinks otherwise.

[First Chapter]

[Previous Chapter]

[AO3 Link]

“By being natural and sincere, one often can create revolutions without having sought them.” ― Christian Dior

Outskirts of Concord, December 2287

Charlie had always been somewhat of an idealist.  She had to be, growing up in bumfuck Appalachia in a family just high enough above the poverty line that the government wasn’t legally required to offer financial assistance.  Her dad was an overworked, underpaid line worker in some automotive factory, and despite never once stepping foot in a coal mine, he carried his ancestors’ resentment toward anything and everything “nucular,” as he called it.  He’d always pop off with these wild conspiracy theories about atom bombs and the end of times.  It seemed laughably prophetic now.

Her mom had stayed at home, reading books to her and her little brother, and promising them they could change the world if they wanted to.  It was those words that kept Charlie going, pushed her towards that Ph.D. that had seemed so monumental back then, so important.  Now, as she stomped around an irradiated wasteland, caked in blood and aching from head to toe, she realized how fruitless it had all been. All those years training to help other people only to spend over two centuries in cryostasis and wake up unable to even help herself.

Thank God for Preston. She didn’t know what would have happened to her if she hadn’t almost died trying to help him at Concord.  She really had no business in a suit of power armor or holding a minigun and fighting a fifteen-foot tall lizard.  Even nearly two months later, she couldn’t come up with a single logical reason why she volunteered so readily.  Was she now going to throw her life away just because a friendly face asked her to?  She laughed at herself.  Probably.

Charlie found herself doing a lot of things simply because Preston asked her to.  Grueling, difficult tasks like “eating enough,” “staying hydrated,” and “getting a good night’s sleep.”  He drove a hard bargain, that Garvey.  What did he take her for anyway? Someone stable?  

In the past month, he’d been taking time away from the laundry list of other things he had on his plate, just to teach her some excruciatingly basic Commonwealth survival skills.  She’d learned the names of all the things that could possibly kill her: Raiders, Gunners, zombie-like creatures called feral ghouls, supermutants, various types of wildlife threats, and radiation.  Everything was irradiated, from the food to the water to the thunderstorms .  At this rate, she just figured she was either going to die or grow an extra ear on her forehead. It was a tossup.    

She’d also asked Preston to help her learn to protect herself.  She didn’t like the idea of guns or violence or any of it, but it was foolish to walk through Hell defenseless. He tried so hard to teach her to shoot one of those god awful laser muskets, but it took too long to ready a shot that she was inevitably going to miss anyway.  He had eventually given up on trying, and instead placed a 10mm in her hand.  It was nicer than the one she’d used in Concord, with glow sights and an extended mag.  Apparently Sturges had fixed it up for her. She was beginning to believe there was nothing that man couldn’t do with a roll of duct tape and half an hour.

“MS. CHARLOTTE!”

Charlie jumped as Codsworth abruptly hovered in front of her face.  She’d almost forgotten the Mr. Handy unit had accompanied her on an assignment for Preston, out in Lexington.  Once she’d shown some proficiency with a weapon, he thought it would be good practice for her to take out a “small” band of Raiders who were troubling a nearby settlement.  It was not small, and while she dealt with the issue and convinced the Tenpines settlers to throw their lot in with the Minutemen, Codsworth knew she’d not gotten out of the ordeal unscathed.

“What, Codsworth,” she asked, more annoyed than he deserved.  

“Mum!  Oh thank goodness you responded,” the robot exclaimed giddily floating about in front of her, “You have been staring off into nothing for the past hour of our journey despite my efforts to entertain you with conversation.”

She had not noticed him speaking once, well, at least not since he’d mentioned Nate and Shaun when they’d passed by the rusty remains of a playground.  Maybe she’d tuned him out after that. “Sorry Codsworth.  I have a lot on my mind.”

“Are you aware that you are bleeding?”

“What?” Charlie glanced down to the large tear in her vault suit, and the blood pouring from a bullet wound in her thigh.  She hadn’t even felt it since she used one of those stimpak syringes.  She’d almost forgotten she had it. “ Shit. ”

“Such language, mum!  Hardly befitting of a lady of your stature.”

“Find me a lady of any stature who doesn’t curse when she’s been shot in the leg,” Charlie quipped, grunting as she sat down to redress the wound, “Do you still have that gauze you picked up at the plant?”

“Yes, of course,” came his quick reply as he produced a bundle of cleanish gauze in one of his metal arms, and handed it to her.

“Thanks,” Charlie said, taking the cloth from him and beginning to work, wrapping it tightly around her leg.  She just needed something to stop the bleeding until they made it back to Sanctuary.  They weren’t too far now, maybe a mile or so from the bridge.

Once she found her amateur wound dressing to be suitable, Charlie continued on back to the settlement, Codsworth prattling on endlessly about the bliss of pre-war life.  She understood where he was coming from.  That didn’t mean she wanted to hear it.

She stopped suddenly in her tracks when she spotted movement ahead of them, off to the side of the dirt road.  It looked like a man in raider leathers, digging for something.  

“What is it, Ms. Charlotte,” Codsworth asked loudly and without an ounce of tact.

Charlie shushed him, but it was too late, the man had already heard them, rising to his feet and moving his hand to draw his weapon.  She didn’t let him have the chance, firing several rounds into his chest before he could.  She hated that she was getting good at that.

She approached the body, prone and lifeless, and knelt down, beginning to rifle through his pockets for anything useful: ammo, stimpaks, caps . Yes, caps .  If anyone had told her that in the future the formal currency would be Nuka Cola bottle caps, she wouldn’t have tossed so many of them in the recycling bin.

It wasn’t until she looked up that she noticed that there was another body, a young woman lying in a shallow grave also donning the signature raider attire.  Her arms were crossed ceremoniously across her chest, hubflowers scattered across and around her body.  Charlie looked down at the man she’d just killed and remembered that he had been digging.  

She felt sick.  In her mind, she conjured an entire tragic scene in which a poor, mourning raider had simply been trying to bury a loved one and was startled by the obnoxious shouting British robot.  When he reached for his gun, just a reflex, he’d been shot in the chest by some cagey redhead with an itchy trigger finger.  If she’d only paid more attention, she might have noticed sooner and she and Codsworth could have taken a wider arc around the man.  He wouldn’t have had to die.

Pocketing her looted items, she holstered her gun and bent down to pick up the shovel, starting first by filling in the grave of the lady raider.  It was the least she could do.

“Pardon me, Ms. Charlotte,” Codsworth asked, attempting to be gentle, “What are you doing?”

She sniffed her nose, fighting back the tears she wanted to cry, and pointed the shovel at the woman.  “He was just trying to bury her.”

Charlie swore she could hear the gears in Codsworth’s massive metal head clicking and smoking as he tried to make sense of her behavior.  After a moment, he spoke.  “Need I remind you that these scoundrels would have murdered us on sight?”

She shook her head and stuck the shovel into the dirt.  “Doesn’t matter.”

As she worked, her memory was flooded with painful, frozen flashes from the vault.  Images of the callous man who killed Nate and stole her baby, of Nate’s stiff, frozen body that still lay in the cryochamber, perfectly preserved with the exception of the fatal gunshot wound in his chest.  Charlie had opened the chamber, hoping she could save him, or at the very least say goodbye, but he was already gone.  She’d slipped the wedding ring from his finger and left him there, entombed along with the rest of her neighbors who unwittingly signed themselves up for a sick science project.  When Preston learned what had happened in 111, he offered to help her lay everyone to rest properly, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.  She couldn’t stomach the idea of walking back into that frozen hell.

She could, however, offer some absolution to this Raider.  

“I’m going to bury him next to her,” she announced, looking at Codsworth before moving over several feet and beginning to dig a new plot.

The robot protested with an exasperated huff. “I applaud your sentimentality, mum, but it is getting quite late.  At this rate it will be completely dark before we return to Sanctuary Hills.

“If you want to go on ahead, you can,” Charlie said with a dismissive wave up the road, “Tell Preston I’ll be along shortly.”  “Perish the thought,” Codsworth retorted, properly offended. “I will not abandon you to the wasteland at night.  Just… do please hurry.”

Charlie worked as fast as she could, but her body was weary from her days of journeying and fighting, so digging and filling in the grave had taken longer than it should have.  When she finally finished, the clock on her PipBoy read “23:00,” and the sky was completely dark, well except for the stars.  They, at least, had survived the apocalypse.

It was after midnight before Charlie hobbled across the bridge and into Sanctuary Hills, Codsworth zooming past her, a cacophony of buzzing and whirring and shouting for Preston.  At this rate he was going to wake up the entire settlement.  She managed to make it over to the home where Sturges had set up his workshop, and flopped herself down on the concrete with a grunt.  The effects of the stimpak had worn off, and with the bullet still lodged firmly in her leg, it hadn’t healed entirely and it throbbed like a bitch.  

There was a hurried rustle of footsteps, accompanied by Codsworth’s voice complaining about how she’d “foolishly buried some raiders against all good judgement.” If anyone needed a chill pill, it was that robot.  

“Thank you for taking care of her, Codsworth,” Preston said, a gentle laugh falling off the ends of his words, “I’ll handle it from here.”

“You’re most welcome, Mr. Garvey.  I apologize for my mistress’ recklessness.” His words were pointed and Charlie couldn’t believe she was being tattled on by her own Mr. Handy.   He zoomed off to busy himself with the fruitless task of trying to restore their old home.

Preston shook his head, and continued to laugh as he approached Charlie, “Man, that machine is something else.”

“No joke,” came Charlie’s weak reply, as she attempted to adjust herself to sit more comfortably.

“Whoa,” Preston exclaimed and rushed to her side. “You okay?

He hadn’t noticed the wound, and for whatever reason Charlie didn’t want him to.  “Yeah.  I’m fine.”

He frowned, warm brown eyes flicking down to the blood seeping through the gauze on her leg, and then looked back up at her.  He smiled, but she could tell he was worried.  “That’s funny, ‘cause you don’t look too fine.”

“I beg your pardon,” she bantered.  Deflection.  She couldn’t stand the way his concerned expression made her feel. “I know I’m not a supermodel or anything but--”

“Charlie.”

She faltered under his gaze, tears immediately bubbling up in her eyes.  She took a deep breath and fought them back before speaking.  “There were more Raiders than we thought.  Codsworth and I got overwhelmed and I got shot in the leg, but I’m fine.  People get shot around here all the time, right?”

“We try to avoid getting shot,” he remarked, his exasperation not quite as shrill as Codsworth’s, “How many raiders were there?”

“Fifteen, maybe twenty.”

“Jesus.” He rose to his feet and walked over to the metal cabinets just past one of the workbenches. He knelt and opened one of the doors, reaching far back inside. He emerged with a full fifth of Old Appalachia and a medical kit that was, like everything else in the world, held together by duct tape.  He returned to his previous position at Charlie’ side and sat down making an almost concerted effort to make eye contact.  “You know I wouldn’t have sent you out by yourself if I’d--”

“This isn’t your fault, Preston.” She lay a hand on his arm, and offered him a smile. “If anything it’s mine for rolling in the front entrance, guns blazing.”

He laughed.  “Man, you’ve got to be more careful.”

“No promises.” Charlie lifted her hand from his arm and pointed to the bottle of whiskey.  “What’s that for?”

“You,” Preston answered, picking it up and handing it to her, “We have to get this bullet out of you before it gets infected, and you’re going to want something to dull the pain.  So, start drinking.”

“Say no more.” Popping open the bottle, she kicked back a long, burning swig.  The whiskey tasted like home and two-hundred years ago.  She watched as he opened up the medical kit and dug through the items inside.  “Have you ever done this before?”

“What? Dug out a bullet,” he asked, bitter smirk on his lips, “Yeah. More times than I would have liked.  Like you said, people get shot around here all the time.”

Charlie took another drink and swallowed hard, the alcohol not working fast enough to keep her pulse from jumping at the sight of metal tweezers and rubbing alcohol. “How bad does it hurt?”

Preston laughed again, glancing over at her this time. “Bad.”

“Well… that’s comforting.”

“I’m just being honest,” he explained, positioning himself so that he had a good look at her affected leg.  He took his gloves off and looked up at her, “May I?” She nodded nervously, and watched as he unwound the bandage and cut away the remaining pieces of vault suit.  She hadn’t gotten a good look at the injury until now, and she was thankful that the bullet seemed to be of a small caliber, like those that turrets fired, and wasn’t lodged too deeply.  Under the bright lamplight, she could see it’s dull metal reflection.  Preston sighed in relief, most likely noticing the same thing.

That it would hurt “bad” had been an honest understatement.  Even after several shots worth of whiskey, the sharp burning pain of alcohol and tweezers pulling the bullet from her thigh was enough to make her light headed.  Even Preston’s gentleness couldn’t spare her that much, and she squirmed and held her breath just to keep from screaming and waking up the others.  When it was all said and done, she was trembling, out of breath, and sobbing like a child.  

“Congratulations,” Preston said softly as he began to dress the now clean wound, “You survived your first Commonwealth surgery.”

Charlie let out a weary laugh and let her head fall back against the wall behind her, looking up at the ceiling, eyes unfocused. “Thanks, doc.”

“Don’t mention it.”  

There was a long pause in which she heard him inhale as if he were going to say something, and then exhale as if he thought better of it.  She brought her eyes down to him, effects of the alcohol really hitting her, along with the endorphin high.  “Something on your mind?”

He stopped what he was doing to meet her gaze. “Why’d you go to all that trouble to bury those raiders?”

“I…” She began, but hesitated, worried that he’d disapprove of her compassion for members of a group that’d terrorized him for days on end at Concord, who killed some of his friends. “I thought it was the right thing to do.  When we walked up on him he was in the middle of burying a comrade.  He’d spread flowers over her and everything…”

She choked on the last words and trailed off, but Preston seemed to understand, as he nodded and went back to dressing her wound.

“I feel sorry for them sometimes too,” he admitted, as he tied a neat knot in the bandage, “They might be messed up, but they’re still people.”

“Right.” Charlie nodded.

“You’re a good person,” he stated, eyes fixing on hers. “I’m… I’m glad you decided to stick around.”

Her face became hot. It must have been the whiskey finally getting to her, she told herself.  After all, it wouldn’t make sense for her to get all flustered over a compliment.  She carelessly let her hand fall on his arm again. “Me too.”

Charlie awoke the next day, more afternoon than morning, tucked neatly into a bed that she could scarcely remember crawling into.  In fact, everything from the time Preston had finished dressing her wound was blurry and she made a mental note to avoid the Old Appalachia from now on, or at least to refrain from drinking half a fifth in one sitting.  She crawled out from beneath the thin blanket and sat up, leg aching more than it had since she’d gotten shot.  Damn.

Glancing down, she noticed she was wearing a pair of faded jeans that were too short for her and an old white tee that exposed her navel when she raised her arms to stretch and yawn.  They were not her clothes, and she’d no idea whose clothes they were, or how she got out of her vault suit and into them.  She snorted out a laugh at the thought of poor Preston fumbling around in the dark trying to help her change.  She doubted that’s what happened, but her memory was too fuzzy to say it hadn’t.

Across the room, folded neatly atop her dresser was a familiar blue and yellow fabric, and she hopped up-- too quickly, wincing at the pain in her leg-- and limped over to take a look.  Picking it up and unfolding it, it took her a moment to realize that it wasn’t her whole vault suit anymore, missing an entire bottom half, and split open down the front.  She also noticed that there were neatly stitched seams along the edges. A jacket?  Someone had gone to the effort of making a jacket from her vault suit and she didn’t even know who to thank.  

She slipped one arm in and then the other. It fit like a glove, a much more comfortable, less skin-tight glove than it had previously.  A quiet knock on the doorframe nearby drew Charlie’s attention and she darted her head up to see Marcy standing in the doorway, smirk in place of her signature scowl.   Suddenly, Charlie remembered.

“I’m glad it fits,” Marcy said as she looked Charlie up and down.  Preston had woken the other woman up the night before to ask if she had anything Charlie could wear.  Marcy had cursed and complained, but ended up shooing him away and helped her get changed and into bed.  Apparently she was also the culprit behind Charlie’s new jacket.  “Couldn’t salvage the whole thing.”

“You did this,” Charlie asked, examining the sleeves.

“Yep,” Marcy stated, looking down at the ground as if she was embarrassed, “Couldn’t get back to sleep after Garvey woke me up, and figured it might be good to have.  Considering none of my clothes are quite long enough for your beanpole ass.”

Charlie laughed, and tugged at the bottom of the t-shirt. “Thanks, Marcy.”

“Yeah, well don’t get used to it.  I still think you’re useless,” Marcy retorted with a huff, but it was clear she didn’t mean what she said. “And I want my clothes back as soon as you find something else to wear.”

Charlie nodded, and Marcy turned to walk away, but stopped and pivoted back around on her heel, pointing an index finger at her.  “Mama’s been waiting for you to wake up.  She found some Jet this morning and is off her rocker talking about some bright glowing heart shit.  Just a heads up.”

Before Charlie could even say her thanks, Marcy was gone. Turning her attention back to herself, she realized she had no clue where she’d left her PipBoy.  She scanned the room, and saw it sat on the floor near her boots.  Picking it up and examining it for damage, she fastened it to her wrist and then slipped on her boots before heading out into the hallway.

It was a bit disorienting at first.  She wasn’t in the place where she normally slept, instead she stood in the house that had become the common area for all of the settlers.  She must’ve been too woozy and injured to make it farther into the cul de sac.  She turned to her left and spied Mama Murphy in the open living room, sitting in her specially crafted chair, feet dangling happily just a few inches from the ground.

“Hey kid,” she hollered, motioning for Charlie to come closer, and Charlie obliged, secretly hoping that her doped up insight would give more answers about where Shaun had been taken.

“Mornin’ Mama,” Charlie answered and made her tedious way over to the old woman and sat down on the sofa near her.

“The Sight,” Mama croned, “It’s shown me more about your boy, your sweet boy.”

Charlie winced, unsure if she wanted to know now, but leaned forward and took the old woman’s outstretched, weathered hand. “What is it,” she pleaded.

Just as Marcy said, Mama Murphy recited a prophecy about Diamond City, and people with chained up hearts refusing to provide Charlie with answers about her son’s whereabouts.  With the exception of one.  One heart that would lead her way, “so bright against the dark alleys it walks.” It didn’t make sense, but she’d never been to Diamond City, didn’t have enough information to even begin to decipher it.

“What does that mean,” she asked clumsily

Mama smiled, and shook her head.  “Beats me, Kid.  I only know what the Sight shows me.  Maybe you get me some mentats, maybe I--”

“Now, Mama,” grumbled a familiar voice nearby, Charlie followed the old woman’s gaze to where it had been preemptively fixed on the door Sturges had just entered, face covered with smudges of oil, “You know Ms. Charlie’s not gonna fall for any of that nonsense.”

She shrugged. “Meh, you never know, Sturge.  Seems like she wants to find her boy.”

“Not sure the boss would like it too much if he knew you were abusin’ her good graces,” Sturges scolded her playfully as he popped open a bottle of Nuka Cola, and sat the cap in a pile with others on the counter.

“Preston's not my boss,” Mama scoffed, and then turned back to Charlie, “He’s waiting for you though, kid.”

“Preston?” Charlie asked, taken aback by the sudden change in topic. “Me? Why?

Mama and Sturges exchanged a glance before Sturges spoke up.  “Don’t really know to be honest.  He doesn’t really say much about how he’s feelin’, but he’s been worried ever since you left.”

“He sees your promise,” Mama chimed in, “He sees what I see.”

Even with the analgesic effects of a newly injected stimpak, walking the length of the neighborhood had proven to be a slow, awkward process for Charlie.  Her leg was weak, throbbing, and numb,  but at least it still worked.  At least she was still alive.  

The more time she had to think about her escapade at Corvega, the more she realized how she’d survived on nothing but pure, unadulterated luck.  She’d seen it in Preston’s eyes the night before, his bewilderment that she’d managed to take down a raider gang of that size.  She’d also seen his guilt, as if he intended to blame himself for something that had not happened.  For all she knew of him, that was normal.  Whatever had happened before she ran into him and the others in Concord really did a number on the guy.

Charlie heard him before she saw him, humming and making an effort to tune a two hundred year-old guitar.  A smile twitched on her lips, heart warming at the sight of him sat on a rusty patio chair, surrounded by an audience of lawn flamingos.  He had his hat off and laying on the table. In her two months of knowing him, she’d never seen him so relaxed.

“Your G’s a little sharp there Garvey,” she called out to him playfully as she made her way over and sat down in the chair across from him, propping her good leg up on the table.  He didn’t flinch or show any other signs of surprise at her approach, and continued to fiddle with the guitar.

“I know,” he answered, tearing his eyes away from the instrument to look up at her, “I can’t get the damn thing to cooperate.”

“It is at least a couple of centuries old.”

He sat the guitar down and turned to face her more squarely.  It was the first time she could remember getting a good look at him with his hat off.  Objectively, of course, he was handsome, with soft features and a smile that he definitely knew how to use to his benefit.  Preston was nice.  He wasn’t naive.  How could he have been, growing up in a world like the one she’d woken up in? The scar that ran from temple to cheekbone on the left side of his face was more prominent than it had seemed before,  masked in shadows.  It looked like an old wound, and she wondered how he’d gotten it.

“Well,” he said, amusement plain on his face, “Being a couple centuries old hasn’t stopped you.”

“It certainly tried,” she replied, ignoring the knots in her stomach and back of her mind telling her it might have been better if it had stopped her. “Damn near got the better of me at that plant.”

Preston nodded and let out a breath. “About that… how are you feeling?”

Charlie looked down at her injured leg and then back up at him. “Like shit,” she stated, “But I suppose that’s better than the alternative.”

“That’s for sure,” he said, sort of absentmindedly, gaze seeming unfocused and off in the distance.  There was a long, heavy pause before he spoke again. “I don’t think I ever got around to saying thank you last night.  I really appreciate everything you’ve done for us since Concord.  Without your help...well, I’m not sure we would have made it.”

“I…”Charlie began, but trailed off, “You’re welcome, Preston.”

There was another pause and he leaned forward and grabbed his hat, tracing his fingers across the brim.  “I know that I told you I’m one of the last Minutemen, but I don’t think I ever mentioned how it ended up that way.”

She shrugged. “I figured you would tell me when you were ready to talk about it.”

“I’ve started calling it the Quincy Massacre,” he said somberly.

“Quincy.  That’s where you and the others are from, right?”

“That’s right,” he answered, “Sturges, Mama Murphy, and the Longs all lived in Quincy when the Minutemen got a call for help dealing with some Gunners who’d been scouting the area.  I went with Colonel Hollis, my commanding officer at the time, and several others to answer the call.  It all went downhill after that.”

Unsteadily, Preston opened up to her, explaining how his contingent had been the only to arrive, and their numbers were too few to handle an assault by the much more heavily armed Gunners.  Colonel Hollis had called for help, only for a traitorous Minutemen veteran named Clint to show up and lead the Gunners right through the gates.  Preston told her how he had to watch settlers and his own comrades die, helpless and running through the streets.  He’d made a knee jerk decision to evacuate, and take as many survivors with him as he could along the way. Apparently, that wasn’t where the trouble had ended though.  He and his group traveled for over a month without finding anywhere safe to settle, facing disaster after disaster until finally getting trapped up in the museum at Concord.

The story was heartbreaking, but to watch Preston tell it was even more so.  Charlie could tell that he blamed himself for each and every loss that happened under his leadership.  He wore his guilt all over his face.  

“I’m sorry that happened to you,” she said softly, “And I’m glad that I showed up when I did, although I really have no idea how I managed to do… all of that.”

“It’s almost like it’s fate... or something,” he muttered.  His words were followed by an embarrassed laugh and a shake of his head as if he couldn’t believe his own mouth. “Sorry.  I’ve been spending too much time around Mama.”

“Hey.” Charlie laughed, and slid her leg off the table, leaning forward to pat his shoulder reassuringly. “Hope’s addictive. Just like the chems.”

Preston sighed. “Damn it if that’s not the truth.”

“Also, I think the old loon might be onto something,” she added, tapping a finger to her temple, “The only reason I limped out to this end of the settlement to see you was because Mama said you wanted to talk to me, something about you seeing my promise?”

“Well I’ll be damned,” he said appearing genuinely surprised, as if Mama Murphy’s clairvoyance was something new, “She’s out here stealing all of my thunder.”

The way he looked at her, as if she held the entirety of his hope in her trembling hands, made her shift uncomfortably.  The weight of Mama Murphy’s words now settled on her shoulders like a lead blanket.  She had never been one to believe in coincidences, but it was hard to accept that any of this was her destiny.

She cleared her throat, attempting to be nonchalant. “So, what’s this promise of mine everyone is so certain of?”

“The Commonwealth desperately needs the Minutemen,” Preston explained, “Now more than ever, and I plan to rebuild them stronger and more organized, without all of the petty squabbles and infighting that have plagued our history.”

“Sounds like you just need to find a good leader,” Charlie remarked, feeling helpful.

Preston eyed her intently and she suddenly regretted her words. “Exactly,” he said with a grin.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” she protested, waving her hands in front of her in a panic, “You’re not suggesting that I should lead the Minutemen, are you?”

“I am.”

“On what qualifications?”  She was nearly shrieking. “I know next to nothing about the organization, it’s history.  I can barely hold my own in a fight. I--”

“Charlie,” Preston remarked, rather directly, “The Minutemen aren’t an army.  We’re citizen soldiers, people of the Commonwealth banded together to protect ourselves and decide our own futures. We fell apart because our leadership forgot what we stood for, but you could bring us back together, bring the whole Commonwealth together.”

“Why me?” Charlie was flattered at his faith in her but so confused. “Why not you, or anyone else?”

“You helped us at Concord and every day since, without anything in it for you,” he explained, “You had your own problems to deal with and you helped us anyway.  Hell, you even won Marcy over.  That kind of compassion and selflessness has been in short supply around here for a long time.”

“Preston, I am flattered by all of this, but I’m not sure I can take on that kind of responsibility right now.”

“Listen,” he said, offering her a reassuring smile, “If you really don’t feel like you’re up to it, I’m not going to twist your arm.  I get that it’s hard to deal with other people’s problems when you’ve got your own.”

Charlie pondered for a moment, and asked, “What would I have to do?”

“Just what you’ve been doing,” he answered as if it were obvious as day, “Help people. Recruit. Spread hope. And I’ll be behind you every step of the way.”

She couldn’t deny that it was tempting.  As much of a mess as she was herself, she was compelled to help others.  If anything, it could give her something to focus on, a sense of purpose, a way to use her skill set.  She brought her eyes up to meet his, chased away the nagging doubts in her head, and nodded. “Okay.  I’ll do it.”

“You’re sure?”

“As sure as I’ll ever be.”

“Well, the leader of the Minutemen has always held the title of General, and since I’m the last of the Minutemen, there’s no one here to argue with me when I say it belongs to you now.”

“So I’m General Smart now?” Charlie laughed at the complete absurdity of the situation. Leading a bunch of neo-colonials to resettle Massachusetts wasn’t exactly how she pictured her life turning out.  “Does that mean I get a cute little hat?”

Preston returned her laughter, relief washing over his face at her decision. “If you want one, General, then absolutely.”

Perhaps her mother had been right all of those years ago.  Maybe she really could change the world.

[namjoonsyoongi]

blurred lines | namgi

summary: what’s a few blowjobs between friends?

rating: M

word count: 4610

genre/tags: friends to lovers, friends with benefits, university au, comedy, crack, fluff, angst 

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18663031

Namjoon and Yoongi have known eachother for as long as they could spell their own names, but that wasn't enough to keep Namjoon from wanting to slap his friend upside the head sometimes.

What did keep him from doing so were the little things. The song Yoongi wrote him for his seventeenth birthday, a last minute rap that lasted all of fifty seconds written on a crumbled sheet of lined paper; A song that Namjoon wouldn’t be able to remember even if someone put a gun to his head and told him to recite it. The way that he could read his mind on any given day and act accordingly, and how they’d have a conversation with one another through brief glances and raised eyebrows alone.

Yet he still managed to discover a way to be utterly infuriating.

The other night, the all too allusive Min Yoongi, cat-eyed and full of indifference, crawled into his bed in the middle of the night. Have you ever watched the flicking tongue of a snake as it slithered toward a mouse, and then looked away before it could swallow the mouse whole? That's what Yoongi was to Namjoon on nights like these, intruding into the covers and tangling himself in Namjoon's longer limbs.

Namjoon wouldn't have any issue with a few nighttime cuddles, Yoongi's was just one of the many affectionate boys in their group of friends, and wasn't anywhere near the worst of it. Jimin could be more attached to him than his own skin, and Taehyung was like a puppy in the way he needed constant verbal and physical affirmation to make sure they were, in fact, best friends forever.

Yoongi's not like that, not most of the time. He came with a purpose.

"What's wrong?"  

"Nothing's wrong," Yoongi was simply laying by Namjoon's side at this point, before rolling over into him. "I'm just annoyed with this project. I texted my lab partner, Seungwan, and she’s more lost than I am. I'm never gonna finish this dumb fucking -- stupid fucking -- fuck this project. I'm getting pissed just thinking about it."  

"You should have never took engineering."

He really shouldn't have, but Namjoon knew why he did. He'd spent enough time at his house growing up to know of the expectations his parents had for him, as did every parent. Namjoon had almost fallen into the same trap, on track for medical school until one day, with the lyrics of Epik High's Fly on loop in his head, something stirred in him to stand up and say no. Namjoon spent his first year as a music major estranged from his parents, while Yoongi spent it as the epitome of the perfect son, and unhappy.

Namjoon spoke again. "On the brightside, only one more year."

"Shut up, please."

That was not the first night, where everything was different. Where those lines between friendship and lover blurred, for just an hour, sometimes two.

Yoongi, rather than sulk and complain, opted to release a kiss onto Namjoon's neck - and then another.

"Mm."

He keeps going, further and further, and Namjoon never tries to stop him, even when he knows he should. He palms the bulge in Yoongi's track pants, which seems to be exactly what he wants, and gets to work, going for just long enough until the warmth was enough to burn away any remaining irritation.  

Namjoon never went all the way with Yoongi, but it would probably be pretty nice.

Yoongi's lips had that sweet taste of rum the first time, and it calmed the bitter flames of the vodka present in Namjoon's throat. He couldn't say for sure who made the first move, but he could perfectly recall the pleasant fuzz that clouded his senses, and the way Yoongi moaned as if no one could hear them, as if Jin wasn't in the next room over.

When Namjoon awoke, the faint memory of Yoongi's weight in his mattress was all that remained. Any semblance of permanency floated into the air like dust, he greeted a smirking all-knowing Jin the next morning and went to class none the wiser. A dream, he chalked the whole thing up to, just a weird dream.

"Can I be honest?"

"Go off."

"I'm starting to think Yoongi isn't exactly straight."

Silence.

Like a choir, Hoseok, Jimin, and Taehyung burst into loud, screeching laughter, accompanied with celebratory hand clapping and Hoseok throwing himself into Namjoon's lap because he can't keep his balance with the sheer humor of it all.

"-And you just realized this!?"

Namjoon swallowed something stuck in his throat.

It's during a brief period of peace with Yoongi, who's laying sprawled against Namjoon's chest, when he asks about it. Namjoon had meant to approach such a subject with the utmost eloquence and thoughtfulness - You can trust me with anything you know, sometimes I feel like you tell the others things you won't tell me. I never would have judged you if you told me you like more than just girls. Do you even know how much respect and appreciation I have for you? That I'll always have for you?

But what came out of Namjoon's mouth is, "Do you give all of us blowjobs?"

Yoongi didn't answer immediately. Namjoon lifted his neck, but all he could see was the black waves of hair on the top of his head, leaning against his chest. The air in the room fogged with the added tension, and Namjoon could only guess what Yoongi's face looked like.

He said nothing. Nothing . He shuffled out of the covers and away from him, leaving the room with the mundane click of the door closing behind him.

That was something Namjoon had always known about Yoongi, his silence was louder than anything, he never had to yell.

"Fool me once? Shame on me. Fool me twice? Shame on you. Suck my dick a third time and 'no homo' is officially off limits." Jin yelped into laughter at his own joke before Namjoon could even process the words.

This was why Namjoon came to Jin for absolutely nothing.

"You're not funny."

"You're gay," Jin said, practically basking in the glare he's earned from Namjoon. "-No excuses, you sucked his dick."

Namjoon rose from his seat. "Don't tell the others."

"Why not? The rest of us admitted we were at least a little gay freshman year, we've been waiting for your coming out for years - years!"    

So you knew about Yoongi too? Namjoon wanted to ask. There was something humiliating about the fact people who Yoongi had known for three years knew more than the one who knew him for fifteen; An anchor of shame dropped silently into his empty gut.  

"Not about that," Namjoon said instead, digging into the fridge for a can of beer. "About me and Yoongi, what we've been...you know."

"Oh no, I won't. That'd scar Jungkook and you know it, that's like when you find out that your mom and dad have sex for the first time."

He tossed the can of beer in his hand, not caring enough to see where it landed, if it smacked against the handsome face that was the older's pride, or broke something along the way.  

"...I don't."

Namjoon detached from him, and Yoongi groaned once the cold air met his wet length. "Wh-What?"

"I don't give the others blow jobs, you're an asshole for saying that."

"I know, I'm sorry. Really." Namjoon, about to dip his head back under the covers, stopped to continue his thought. "Also, It's really hard to have a conversation with you while your dick is in my mouth." He moved to go under for a second time, and halted again. "Also, neither do I."

"Neither do you what?

"Give the others blowjobs."

"Good."

Shards of glass could cut you so easily, a sharp end that sinks deep into your skin, yet you don't immediately feel it when it does. That was the thing about them, he and Yoongi; Their bond was like glass, clear and delicate, it could break at one wrong move, with the simplest of words that hit the other in just the right place.

With someone as clumsy as he was, who has broken more than enough glass made objects, a connection like that was futile. Or that's what he thought, cause no matter how bad the fall, no matter how worse the cut, they somehow put themselves back together as if it had never been touched.

"Joon, your cup!"

Snapped forcefully from his reverie, the weight that had been steady in his hand slipped out before he could save it. The jarring sound of shattering glass cut out the white noise that had been playing as a soundtrack to his own thoughts.

He cursed, watching the reflective shards twinkle menacingly on the tiled floor. "Shit."

"You know, sometimes me and Jimin talk about getting a plastic set just for you." Jungkook jokes, it wasn't anything new to him.

"Let me guess! Namjoon bumped into something again." Jimin calls out, turning around the corner to be met with the new mess decorating the floor of his kitchen.

"He spaced out, I think."

"The last time you did this shit, I was stepping on tiny - like I swear microscopic pieces of glass that we couldn't clean up."  

Jimin ushers Namjoon out with mumbled reassurances that everything was fine and the two of them would clean it up. Today was one of their regular get-togethers, but it'd be the last one before they'd return home for the holidays. Jimin thought it appropriate to replace their soft drinks with alcohol, alcohol which Namjoon had just spilled half a glass of onto the ground, along with the cup.

In the living room, sat the rest of them, gathered close around Jungkook's flat screen. Namjoon could hear the muted yet very present sound of crunching as Jin and Taehyung shared a bag of chips. Hoseok lounged in a recliner, leaning back and huddling into his blanket, mindlessly flicking through Netflix.

With midterms having marched to and fro and subsequently ruined their lives, Yoongi had been a bumbling mess of yawns and naps for the past month. All both Jin and Namjoon had seen of their roommate was him fast asleep on their couch and drooling on his study notes, and glimpses of him going to and from the school before locking himself in his room.

He wasn't here, Namjoon's shoulders slumped.

"Where's Yoongi?"

"Canceled," Hoseok muttered with a deep-set pout, not looking away from the screen.

"Since when?"

"Five minutes ago."

"Hobi's still pissed." Jin chimes in, the bag rustling as he picked it up and held it out to Namjoon.

Namjoon took a handful of chips, and watched as Hoseok’s pout only deepened, a rare darkness in his eyes that only appeared when you had truly committed the worst of his friendship sins. "I wouldn't be if it weren't for this being our last night here, or if he weren't ditching for Seungwan. I would never...we would never!"

The room lapses back into a silence, as if they imagine Namjoon can understand every word and name that had just left their mouths.

"Seungwan?"

Despite everything, Yoongi was always the one to initiate things. Even when he wore his favourite black skinny jeans, and Namjoon's eyes became glued to the gentle curves of his thighs and the belt that hugged his waist. Even when, just like that snake, he wanted nothing more to devour him whole - he didn't, he waited for him.

It felt strange to take what he knew wasn't truly his.

Then came those past two months, where Yoongi tiptoed around Namjoon, as if coming any closer would break him. Namjoon thought it all in his head, Yoongi was busy, he was an engineering major, he just had to focus. Namjoon thought he was the one who could always make him focus, rejuvenate him, perhaps he was wrong. He was fine with that.

In reality, however, there was Seungwan. Pretty girl Seungwan, with her delicate face and cherry coloured lips. Slim and yet plump just where it mattered.

Jin's words hit so cold that icicles could have formed from his lips. "Seungwan and Yoongi have been dating for the past 2 months."

Why didn't you tell me sooner? Namjoon wanted to yell back at him. Why didn't any of you tell me sooner? Why didn't Yoongi tell me sooner? His heart raged against his ribcage, it wanted to scream and shout too, it wanted to run away from the man child it was stuck in, and who idiotically decided to fall in love with his best friend. The best friend he didn't know was gay until he found his way into Namjoon's sheets, the best friend who never spoke about their moments of passion in the day, the best friend who couldn't care less.

"I'm gonna go get another drink," he said instead.

And so he moved on, moved forward. Swallowed the feelings and let them dissolve somewhere in his gut. The next time he'd see Yoongi, with Seungwan hanging off his arm, he'd smile graciously and greet the both of them. Observing Yoongi as he'd mask on a disinterested demeanor when he did something thoughtful for her. He'd welcome Seungwan like the morning sun, he'd laugh at the jokes she'd quip about all the little ticks Yoongi had that Namjoon was long accustomed to and support her when she’d eventually come to him with questions like “what type of food would Yoongi want me to get?”, “Do you think Yoongi would like this as a gift?”. He'd listen attentively to every word, as if she wasn't just echoing the thoughts and feelings that had planted into his very being like a weed, sprouting once again every time he thought he’d picked it out.  

Or at least that's what he would have liked to say happened, and that's what would have happened, had it not been for the long road trip he was stuck on the morning after Namjoon found out about her.

A blanket of mist settles across their driveway like smoke. The overnight storm pelted away the flames of his intoxication, but the subsequent hangover pounded just as relentlessly.

By the car, a phantom stood, posture hunched. Yoongi looked like he was sinking into a black hole with his oversized winter coat, it was almost endearing.

Cute. Adorable actually.

Yoongi smirked. "Wow, who hit you with a bus?"

You.

The grey scarf flew from his pocket as he wrapped it around his neck and up his face, until all but his swollen eyes showed. "Let's just get this over with," He uttered, voice muffled.  

It wasn't a ritual more than it was convenient for Yoongi to drive him back home for the holidays. Their houses were five minute walks between each other respectively, and Namjoon, with his immense lack of grace and poise, has never dared touch a steering wheel in his life. Yoongi liked to say he was his personal uber, then again he also liked to complain about how annoying that was.

On the passenger's side, his eyes catch a rip edged into the cushion with the tiniest of threads holding it together - How is this piece of shit car still alive, honestly? There he sits down stiffly, another place he has essentially spent the past several years making a home of, and the two set off.

The nausea was already striking, and not just from the hangover. Something boiled unwelcome in his chest, and ran all the way down to his abdomen.

Apparently he isn't doing a good job of hiding it, cause Yoongi speaks up and says, "Don't throw up in here."

"I won't. " He snaps back.

Fuck.

He used to think he was better than this, better at setting emotion aside in favour of the overall peace that'd remain instead. Lips zipped shut meant tranquility, and Namjoon valued that; Especially with him, he who he hates more than anything right now.

How...how? How did he fall for this badly acted charade, of course Yoongi never wanted him - like that - if he did, he would have said so.

Stop. Shut up. It isn't that serious.

His jaw locks.

But it really is.

Namjoon's an atheist, but for the first time in years he prays.

He prays that this ride will proceed in silence, because if not, the emotions he didn't have enough time to bury will overflow and drown whatever was left of he and Yoongi's relationship.

Fortunately, the prayer is answered, though sparingly. Identical looking streets pass by wordlessly, with Yoongi twisting and turning through roads and towns that Namjoon can't recognize. His eyes are too exhausted to focus on anything, not that there was anything worth looking at; Every building becomes a blur of mild colours, and the sky is as gray and dull as watching cement dry.

"We're close," Yoongi says.

Namjoon hums, along with the engine as the car slows down, going up a soft incline into a gas station.

The driver's side door opens, Yoongi huddling into his coat as a gust whistles into the vehicle. "I'll be right back."

Don't come back. Just leave me in here to shrivel up and die.

When Yoongi returns, rushing into his seat before shutting the door and ramming the engine again, he says nothing. But Namjoon can hear him, his indifference, a quality which he once admired.

He'd cut his tongue out if it meant he'd keep his mouth shut, but all he can do is sink his teeth into his bottom lip, deeper and deeper as the car pulls out.

"...Yoongi?"

"Yeah?"

Don't say it.

"What am I to you?"

The engine whines, filling the emptiness of the car.

"My best friend."  

The nonchalance cuts Namjoon to the bone, until his lungs are clinging for life. His labour breathes repeatedly stab through the silence, and all he can do is stare, unanswered questions overflowing in his skull.  

They've never talked about - them, what they were and what they did. Any conversations that went past platonic stayed in Namjoon's room and Namjoon's room only. Which is why now even implications of their deeper relationship felt forbidden, his lips clipped shut when the vaguest of words pass his mind.

But Namjoon doesn't have to be the one to say it.

Yoongi laughs, scratching his ear. "Maybe a best friend with benefits?"      

The sharp edges of his eyes go a deeper shade of red, the hurt settling into the crevices. Acknowledgment, shouldn't that satisfy him?

"Still?" Namjoon asks, his voice barely a whisper.

The pink that dusts over Yoongi's cheek is rare. The sight nearly makes Namjoon's heart swell, until he's hit with the thought that Seungwan is on the older man's mind.

"I mean..." Yoongi clears his throat. "Yeah...if you still want-"

"And what about Seungwan?"

His brows furrow, almost offended. "What about her?"

The response boils in Namjoon's ear, like an off key note.

"Can't you be straightforward with me? Like you usually are?" Namjoon says.

"I am."

A snap cuts out his next thought.

They return their attention to the windshield, and watch as the wipers twist unnaturally before flying off the car into the highway, making a couple vengeful scratches across the windows along the way. All that's left of them is two little useless black nubs, which twitch as they try to operate without their second half.

"Aw, shit!" Yoongi curses, a veil of white particles smudging onto the windshield. The flight of snow has accelerated, rushing to the ground and with nothing to push the snow off their windshield, their view of the road is being eclipsed in white at an alarming rate. "I've gotta pullover."

The gravel hisses as Yoongi's car pulls over into the side of the road, coming to a full stop and leaning into his seat with a groan. "The wind must have been too harsh, they completely snapped off. I'm gonna have to call my parents to pick us up, we can't drive like this."

"Are we just leaving the car?"

"We'll lock it and probably get like - I don't know - someone to pick it up. That's gonna cost a shit load."

Namjoon expects the older of the two to pick up his phone and call his parents, but he doesn't and favours sulking back in his seat, hands rubbing his eyes and grumbling to himself. The stare catches onto his peach lips, and the way he's nibbling on his bottom lip.

"Yoongi..."

"Hm?"

"You looked stressed."

"Do I?" He remarks sarcastically, a grin pulling his lips.

Thoughts of Seungwan sink into the very corner of his head as he stares at his companion, someone who he truly has loved so dearly for as long as he could remember. He just wants to pretend he’s his, and hold him so tight that the mere thought of him ever leaving can’t cross Namjoon’s mind.

I just want to be with you, even if it’s only for a second.

"Do you want me to help?" Is all he says.

There's a pause, one that sucks all the air out of him. Yoongi almost laughs, a giddy smile on his face. But slowly, agonizingly, Yoongi's hands tumble down his face until they settle onto his neck. His eyelashes hover, and Namjoon follows them until they finally open and take in the eager and desperate man right in front of him. Yoongi's eyes, so deep and dark, swirling with a curious lust that the other is sinking into.

He doesn't speak, he nods earnestly, as if it was the question he’d been waiting to be asked all day, He leans into Namjoon's space, until their gazes tangle together. His lips, slightly chapped, barely brush over his, testing him.

Namjoon says yes; His large hands envelope his thin wrists, and pulls him forward so that their lips connect. Starting from the soft plump surface, the fuzzy feeling that alcohol can never recreate the same way runs into his veins, and he feels his heart already urging him forward with the strong and abrupt ache that develops.

He goes further, deepening the kiss as Yoongi's arms find their place around Namjoon's neck.

He doesn't know how long the kissing last until he manages to groan out a husky "c'mere," between the mess they're becoming. He breaks the kiss, waiting for Yoongi to come to him as the smaller tries his best to crawl onto Namjoon's lap in the cramped car. It's in that quiet moment that Namjoon realizes both of their coats are already off and probably somewhere in the backseat, lost to the heat of the moment.

He can already feel the growing bulge in the Yoongi's jeans, and the man impatiently moves to pull down his own zipper before Namjoon halts the action.

"Let me." He demands, voice husky and out of breath. His fingertips barely graze the metal, and stay there, playing with the sharp criss cross that leads up to the metal tab and enjoys the way the other fusses. Yoongi's head scurries into Namjoon's neck, biting in some kind of retaliation.

"Yoongi..."

"Godammit, what!" He exclaims, huffing warm breaths onto his neck.

"I want to go all the way - well, I wanna fuck you, I guess is the proper way to put it."

He feels the way Yoongi tenses up, and thrives in the flustered tremble that sticks to his voice.

"Y-Yeah. Then...Okay."

Finally, he pulls the zippers down, and helps Yoongi to raise himself up and pull it down to his ankles. Namjoon's hands strokes the newly exposed skin of his thighs, pale and covered in goosebumps.

Yoongi's hands in the meanwhile, begin to fiddle with the leather belt looped around Namjoon's own jeans. His eyes glazed with steam, like fresh mocha. Namjoon, for a first, lets him have his way as he loosens the pants and fights to pull them down.

"-And one more thing..." Namjoon whispers, leaving a kiss on the shell of his ear.

"What?"

"I love you. You know that right?"

"I love you, too." He says, adding the last part after a hesitant pause. “As more than...best friends. A lot more, actually.”

Namjoon smirks, lips trailing down the length of his neck.

"...Then prove it."

"Do you think it worked?" Jimin's voice flutters into the air; His chin is on the young Jungkook's shoulder, watching as his nimble hands maneuver a paint brush across the canvas, lips tight in concentration as he adds a strike of black.

Snowflakes dance gracefully across the glass window to their side, the ice that had once tangled into the earth leaving a mild frost in its wake. Nothing but whispers of the raging winter night was left.  

"Of course it did. It was my idea." Seokjin declares, hands on his hips as he views the large gallery in Jungkook's workroom. He's bullied the youngest more than a few times about having a useless major, but his collection of artwork never ceased to amaze him. Maybe he won't be a beggar on the streets once he graduates afterall.  

"What if they hate each other after this?" Hoseok says, a pout weighing down his face, a real one this time.

Seokin's broad shoulders shrug. "Then you'll have to live with the guilt, couldn't have done it without your A plus acting. Can't wait to see you at the Oscars next year."

A furious slap from Hoseok lands right on his upper arm, and Seokjin cries out as if he's just been stabbed, doe eyes wide and flickering with false innocence.

Taehyung grins, linking arms with Hoseok. "Don't worry about it too much, Hoseokie. Namjoon and Yoongi aren’t stupid, it won't be that long until he figures out Seungwan and Yoongi were never dating."

Is that so...Because they also spent the last year certain that no one but Seokjin knew about their frequent late night rendezvous, something Seokjin quickly learned was quite the opposite.

"Can someone remind me why Jin said they were again?" Jungkook chimes in.

"Jealousy makes the heart grow fonder, Kookie." Seokjin claims, the eldest always seemed to have wisdom to pass on, even if such words of wisdom fell on deaf ears. "Or I guess, more possessive."

"Why can't people just say they love someone when they love someone, it's not that difficult." That was easy for him to say. Jungkook's one and only crush throughout his first years of college was currently leaning over him and giggling softly into his ear, arms hugging his center.

Whenever he recounted he and Jimin's personal love story, it was a few short sentences, and went something along the lines of "met him at orientation and I thought he was cute. Became friends, then I told him I wanted him and we've been going strong ever since."  No one in the room could even imagine a world in which Jungkook's desire could be rejected, or not returned back tenfold, let alone by lovestruck Park Jimin.

The pause in conversation lasts too long, and Jimin pipes up. "They're probably fucking in the car as we speak."

The room bursts into a series of gasps, boos, and broken laughter. The ringing that follows is barely audible, but Seokjin feels the phone buzz in his back pocket. He hushes the rowdy group, before picking up the call without much as a second thought.

“Hello~?”

There's a shuffling of clothes on the other side, but Yoongi's exasperated voice eventually comes onto the line.

“Each and every one of you are so fucking dead to me.”

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep 17: Just Throw em on the Murder Pile

Ah, week one of the Stay-at-Home mandate. After a week of getting so little work done, I decided to get Animal crossing so I could get away from the people I live with to our own little virtual islands. So, I spent my time, fishing so many fishes and bugs for the the museum that wasn’t open yet, placing them all over the island so I could use them later. Went to bed having done all this wonderful work, my masterpiece, my beautiful island.

The next day I woke up an hour later than my brother, who spent that time logging into Animal Crossing, not realizing he was sharing an island with me (for some reason you only get one island per switch, which was a decision they made???) and he was like “the hell are all these fish everywhere?” So he sold all of them, made himself an Oricalchos shirt and a Yami third eye in the fashion editor, and then used all my fish money to buy so many oil drums and put them all over the trash side of his island.

I was asleep one hour. One single hour. It is all trash oil drums and fire and a poorly drawn Oricalchos t-shirt.

Ah, the irony when you get a game to escape the people you live with only to realize that you share the location of the game itself--with those same people. The irony. 

So anyways, we found out that our efforts were futile anyway, long story short we sort of...soft locked this children’s game, and had to restart the entire island. lol.

So while I recover from that shock, lets talk about Yugioh.

They’re still on the Caltrain and Yami is still appearing to have a lot of difficulty remembering how to use cards without Yugi. But, we find out at the end of the episode, he’s mostly just pretending to have difficulty. We’ll get to why this bluff is so mind boggling later--Yami just has a lot of weird layers to him, and most are just so...so lovingly stupid.

Anyway, Timaeus doesn’t work with him now, but honestly it wasn’t clear why Timaeus ever did in the first place since Yami is both two people and a dead person at the same time. Yami shouldn’t exist.

This doesn’t matter in the end, because Yami is good at cards when he isn’t actively trying to get cursed to give himself a handicap like he did with Raphael.

Unlike Yami, Joey decides to reflect upon the moral consequences of Hella Killing a Guy, which youknow...should mess you up a little bit.

But obvi, Rex has to die for the plot to move forward, so RIP.

(more RIP under the cut)

Yugioh made sure to give Rex a big send off that took waaaaay longer than Gurimo, just saying.

Lololololol

Just two u’s, sleeping so pleasantly.

And I’m just guessing, ps, but I feel like it’s a good guess. I feel like this wasn’t like this in the original.

Back at the train that should be crossing the ocean at this point, Weevil has pulled out some misdirection. Knowing that Yami has been misdirecting Weevil this entire time, it is just so baffling that he’d totally fall for this.

If someone did this to Seto Kaiba--that I would believe, instantly. But to Yami? OK there, Yami.

Mind you, Yami is grieving, and he’s not mentally all there in both the literal sense and in the mental sense, but wow, Yami. You fell for that.

Yami has lost his entire mind and is just kind of winging it until he gets arrested.

He has no reason to be better than this. He’s like “FML. I’m gonna go ape, I don’t freakin care”

Like, Yami has this anger problem, which the show has said out loud a few times this season, but we haven’t really seen too often in previous seasons to a great degree. So we have to give him some places where he can demonstrate getting super pissed, to make up for the fact that Yami’s character developed has mostly been about “I’m too lonely and cursed to make friends, Yugi.” and “I’m DEAD, Yugi, I don’t want to learn about my history.” and “Gods why are you always making problems for me to solve for you, Kaiba?”

Not saying he hasn’t been mad and vengeful before this moment, but he hasn’t been as explosive before this season--it’s always been a chill anger, a quietly menacing kind of crazy, youknow? But...characters change. Yami’s developed to be different now and that’s fine. Being pissed someone killed your soul bud that you share a body with, I feel, is a natural thing to be pissed about.

But, Yami is permanently in a state of anger and brooding since Yugi left, despite being pretty chill for most of the past 4 seasons. It’s like the first time we get to experience Yami be Just Yami since the beginning of Season 1 and it’s a completely different Yami anyway.

I guess this is to point out that they really did rely on the other to complete their personality. Which is weird, but that is a thing you do with people that you’re spend a ton of time with--you kind of forget how to do things solo.

Like there was this interesting study where they took married people and asked them simple grade school questions, and they answered them fine when they were together in the same room. But, when they were separated--they suddenly would blank on random stuff. They couldn't remember capitals or multiplication tables--simple stuff. But people who were single, were able to do these things fine alone or with a friend.

People who spend a hell ton of time together learn to help eachother answer the questions as a team, and the parts of the brain you use to like...memorize capitals and multiplication might decay because there’s someone else who will just always do it for you.

So anyway, the takeaway I get from this is that the part of Yami and Yugi that could read if Weevil is lying was Yugi and that’s a lot to take in. Yugi might be smarter than Yami? Weird. Low bar, but weird.

So, Yami won’t need to justify to himself like Joey, he’s just gonna kill this guy outright. Immediately. There was some card shenanigans, and I guess he had the opportunity to beat him even further after he was dead? I didn’t fully pay attention to the card logic but it was so brutal that Tea had to get involved.

She was quicker to save even S1 Seto Kaiba, just throwing that out there. Tea was like “I’ll step in between you two, but I’ll be run really slow about it.”

I think she was more worried about Yami going dark than Weevil who’s...already dead. And again, you don't have to worry about Yami going dark. I say it a lot but he’s a dark wizard. This is kind of his zone.

And then, they actually touched for the first time in like--kind of a lot of episodes. I kind of forgot about this ship.

How come when she’s wrestling him it looks more like a hug than the few times they’ve hugged? These writers, man. They’re just...so close to figuring out how to write a ship but just so, so far away.

I just want to remind y’all that the Oricalchos broke Valon’s arm but Tea and Tristan just walked away because they’re that hulk IRL.

I just love that Yugi is so short that Tea has to be on a ladder below him in order to have this pose happen.

After that awkward moment that Yami lost his entire mind and killed a guy, he had another weird moment where he just...looked down at his hands and was like “I’m the real monster?????”

He didn’t think about the moral consequences until AFTER he killed Weevil. And honestly, that feels a lot more like the Yami I know. That was maybe the most Yami thing he did this episode. Reminder, they got into this train duel while trying to stop a runaway train, and they did nothing about that.

So anyway, how’s this train going?

(San Jose has over one million residents but don’t tell Yugioh.)

And then, sadly, I had to say goodbye to my penultimate favorite character in Yugioh, second only to the storyboarder. Goodbye, forever.

At least the death sequence for the Caltrain seemed appropriately long, as it should be. Rex’s went ON but the Caltrain? Lets get that slowmo pan for it. Goodbye, first train in Yugioh (that wasn’t shaped like a dragon.)

And I just figured it was Darts who did this, but apparently Darts was just as upset as I was when he saw that train derail and then soar 500 feet above the track like a figure skater.

Y’ALL

First off congrats to Darts’ fluffy as hell lower eyelash extensions, I’m lowkey jealous.

Second off, every year on the ballot we get a measure that wants to funnel money into the Caltrain. Every single year. It almost never passes, and when it does, the money sort of vanishes into the aether. It’s really annoying.

To think that THIS ineptitude is what helped Darts loose track of Yami and I’m going to assume save the whole damn world.

I can’t believe the auto lobby and the corrupt Caltrain management just saved the world like that.

I can’t believe that’s Canon to Yugioh.

My expression when I found out that after we just mercifully cut the cast by two, they decided to stick in this new guy?

Ugh a new guy.

So Yugi and Tea do say at the end “you ok?” “yeah” so it’s nice that Tea can survive a train crash off a cliff into a ditch. Tea, and this reincarnated ghost. God tier.

Anyway if you just got here, this is a link to read these in order

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

I feel like I say every week “ah, I finally have time to catch up” but I still post at exactly the same rate anyway but...I guess we’ll see, huh?

[bitchiha]

Hello, may I request a matchup and be matched with a male from Naruto,Marvel and Harry Potter, please and thank you. LINK -  The first part is infoship2 (.) tumblr (.) (com) (without the parentheses). You can take as much time as you need to, I don’t mind being patient & waitiing.

A/N: Hey!! Thank you for the request, you’re honestly such a supportive person on my blog and I love you so much <3 w/ that being said, I present your ships under the cut below!

I ship you with..

Shino Auberame!

Tbh I think Shino is so underrated. Like we seen him putting fate and effort into Hinata to help her improve her skills throughout Shonen Jump and Shippuden. With that being said, I think it’s safe to say he can help you cope with and over come the challenges that come with depression and OCD. Like he is a really caring and supportive boyfriend.

He’s smart and observant, so he will be able to tell when you are okay and when you are lying. It doesn’t matter if you’re hiding it the best you can. Being that he’s smart, he won’t pry at you to tell him what’s wrong either (bc you can’t force things out of people), unless he thinks it would be damaging not too.

Working with Hinata and Kiba has improved his patience incredibly. So if you are in a crappy mood or you’re arguing, you can’t piss him off or get under his skin easily. The level headed way he goes about himself would be really helpful for yourself and the relationship as well.

You can’t expect Shino to open up right away. If you start off as friends though (which is what you both prefer anyway), once you become boyfriend and girlfriend he’s much more open. Infact he’ll probably seek you out over anyone else when in need of advice. I think he’d be also really thoughtful and helpful in terms of giving you advice as well. Hes like your personal advisor lol

You also mentioned you have this kind of melancholy temperament and I thought that was so suiting for Shino LMFAOAOAO. Anyway, what I mean by that is like if you’re in one of those moods it won’t annoy him or frustrate him at all. He’ll probably join in, he’s usually like that anyway. You two can be melancholy together. Unless he feels like the mood is unhealthy, then he’ll try and cheer you up.

He has a passion for insects, you have one for animals. You’ll have to put up with him showing you all the cool new insects he’s found and listen to him blab about ‘em to you. In return he’ll go out animal watching with you. He will get very passionate on these expeditions with you, not to mention he’s smarts really come in handy. He’ll know what type of bird likes what type of trees, how to track down a certain animal, how to follow their prints in the dirt, etc.

Loves when you get passionate tbh. You’re both pretty quiet, but when a subject comes up that you’re interested in, you can talk for hours. You two will literally blab together for hours once you’re on a subject you both like. Kiba and Hinata will be like :0 wtf bitch never talks to me that much.

You sometimes think that what you say isn’t going to be Important so you hold back and that instantly made me think of Shino. Not that he holds back what he has to say, but the fact that when he often says something, he’s talked over or cut off. So he would 10/10 understand how you feel and would make a valiant effort to make sure that your voice is heard. Like sure, Kiba can talk over him, but if he tries to talk over you Shino will box his ass. Okay, not really box him, but you get the point. He’ll probably be like “Kiba wait, she wasnt finished talking.” Or “You cut her off, she was saying something important.” Or if those are too forward he’ll probably turn to you and say something encouraging like “Dont worry, I’m listening” or “continue what you were saying” but please, for the love of god, do the same for him.

Youve talked about how you have trust issues with loyalty and relationships, but tbh with Shino you won’t have to worry at all. Like once he’s hooked on you and you’re dating, he’s sold. There’s no one else he’s gonna go to or think about. If anything, he probably has similar views to you in terms of love.

He’d play board games with you and listen to music with you a lot as well. His taste is kind of all over the place in terms of music, but he’s open to any suggestions you have. Will also lowkey be a big anime fan. Probably likes the classic kinds of animes like Dragon Ball Z, One Piece and Pokemon.

Bucky Barnes!

Bucky is attracted to quieter people, they’re just easier to be around. However, he does like talking too. Like he adores having thoughtful conversations with someone he trusts and cares about.

Honestly I think you two are similar in a lot of ways, but not too similar in the sense that things will never be progressive in the relationship, if you know what I mean. Like he has things he needs to work on and you have things you need to work on. Some of his strong suits happens to be your weaker ones, so you two help eachother out a little bit.

Like Shino, he can be standoffish and a little closed off at first but once you start to date, he’s like an open book. It takes a lot of trust to get into a romantic relationship with him, he doesn’t through the boyfriend girlfriend title around like it’s nothing. He takes it seriously.

That being said, your views on love are also very similar. He’s honestly so scared of being cheated on, but he’s also not the type to be over protective or over bearing because of it. If you’re in a relationship with him, he trusts you. He would never think to cheat, in fact, he probably doesn’t give any incoming flirters the time of day.

Honestly, you said you’re described by some as a house cat and I think that vibe is perfect for Bucky. Like he just wants that kind of life. He doesn’t want a crazy and eccentric lifestyle (he’s had his fair share of that), if you wanna laze around on the couch for a day and watch movies, he’s down.

He’ll like Anime too, once you introduce him to it. Probably lives and breathes for Naruto Shippuden. I think he’ll also like sporty anime’s like Stars Align and Haikyuu you cannot change my mind. He’ll be the emotional type when watching anime, which is weird because he’s usually more reserved in terms of emotions. Will love to talk to you about it afterwards.

You can be his shoulder to lean on and a good listener, but so is he. Since you’re both pretty observant people, I think fights can get resolved pretty quickly. Like you’ll be able to think through what happened and come to a conclusion together. Also, he’ll be able to tell when somethings off with you. It may take him a few months of the relationship, but once he’s in the swing of things, he’ll know you like the back of his hand.

He’ll definitely be able to help you stop with being a people pleaser. Like whenever you start down that path he’ll stop you and kinda get you to check yourself real quick. “You don’t have to do that for them,” or instead of you doing it he’ll do it instead, just to get you to stop pleasing that person. He knows you don’t like it yourself and can’t help it sometimes, so he tries his best to help.

He’s athletic asf and he also likes spending time with you, so he will do yoga with you. He’ll probably be so fucking awkward at it at first, like he will not know what he’s doing. Just give him a minuet, he’ll end up really liking it and will probably want to try all those crazy couples yoga poses.

Will like to have deep and thoughtful conversations with you as well. Probably about things you both like. He’s not super talkative unless it’s about something he can get into.

George Weasley!

He’s a nice break from the two more ‘emo mysterious’ types I just suggested. He’ll be a good change from the dreary moments you’ll have. If you’re in a melancholy mood I would think he’d crack some jokes and make you laugh. But sometimes he’ll let you be bc he feels you need your melancholy moments or else you’ll malfunction.

He’ll watch anime with you. To be honest I think all the weasleys would watch it. He wouldn’t mind any kind of anime as long as there is action in it. Whenever you visit him on the holidays or he visits you, you best believe there will be anime marathons. He loves Naruto. I don’t think he’s got the patience to watch the whole entire thing, but he’ll make it a good ways into shippuden before moving on.

George is smart. He is. Like maybe he doesn’t apply himself all that much into school because it doesn’t entertain him, but you entertain him. Like he really likes you. So he’s gonna put effort into you. All that being said, I think he’d be very helpful when it comes to any struggles you have in regards to your depression and OCD.

He’ll know when you’re lying about If you’re okay or not, but he handles it differently than the other two. I think he’ll take it as a sign to cheer you up. Whether it be muttering something sweet to you when you pass each other in the halls, or pulling a giant prank on the school if you are in a particularly sad mood.

He’d be interested in all your interests that’s for sure. He’s not the insecure type, so He’s willing to put himself out there. Sure he’s never done yoga before, but he will do it if you ask him too. Same thing with all your other interests.

Since he does most of the talking in the relationship, he’ll always try and bring up topics you like. That way you can be the one talking more for a change. He’s also so encouraging in wanting you to talk more. He’ll know when to leave you be though. Like if he sees your close to blowing a fuse, he’ll either try and defuse your mood, or leave you alone for some time to think.

Honestly he’s just encouraging in general so if you ever want advice he’s there for you.

Also in terms of your ideas on love, I think he’ll be somewhat in the same boat as you. Like I definitely believe he’s not the type to cheat. He’s invested in you, not the other girls. I think he has a brighter idea to love than yours though. Not that yours is dark or anything, but his is just more ambitious??

Really I think his attitude can be super complimentary to yours. I don’t think they’ll clashing tbh, I think it’s actually very beneficial.

He’s a bit of a tease, so once he first hears someone call you a house cat or describe you as one I definitely think he will call you that. He’ll be like “where’s my darling house cat?”

10/10 think he’d be a good bf to you

[wheremytwinwatches]

[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 34

Last time: Detective Kimblee got curbstomped, nobody wears hats in freezing weather, and the contents of The Mighty Armstrong’s letter shall forever remain a mystery. Onwards!

Inside Fort Briggs, Ed is shocked to learn that having a metal limb attached to your flesh in subzero weather can be hazardous to your health, he’s being treated for exposure. A spiky-haired blonde doctor’s talking about how the cold freezes flesh and unoiled automail will stiffen.

So do all automail Briggs soldiers carry around oil cans, then? Like Buccaneer, who just came into the med room complaining about Al’s head being stuck in his chainsaw-arm. Apparently northern automail- Hold up, is it just me or does this new guy in a labcoat who’s working on Buccy’s arm look like Havoc? Eh, maybe it’s just the cigarette. -northern automail is flexible, lightweight, and resistant to the cold, so they worked out an alloy. And here Ed was just trying to transmute iron, makes sense a blend of metals he’s not consciously trying to manipulate would resist him. Aw, Buccy has an actual automail arm while his chainsaw is getting worked on. I was hoping for shoe-tying shenanigans. After the obligatory “wait this kid’s equivalent to an officer?” moment the Doc recommends he call for Winry to make a cold-weather arm. If he wants to live, that is. Also, that’ll be a hundred cens for the coffee thank you. Hmmm, maybe Ed should do some research on the place he’s going next time? I get that he’s used to Central military life, but the North seems to run on different rules. Still doesn’t keep him from being irritated. [Major-General Armstrong]: “Hello, little red runt.” Major-General Armstrong; so intimidating that when she nicknames our height-sensitive protagonist after a fairy tale he’s too frozen with fear to respond. And then the mechanic returns Al’s head with his “hair” left a scraggly stump? This day is not going the Elric Brothers’ way. Episode 34 - “Ice Queen” ...as much as I like Major-General Armstrong so far and you lot seem to worship her, I have a lot of favorite characters who have taken the title “Ice Queen”. Let’s see how she stacks up against them. Taking a seat at a small desk (I thought it was hers to show off an austere lifestyle or whatever until that picture of North Doc’s family, guess she commandeered the office for a bit), Major-General Armstrong asks how her brother Alex is doing. Aw, she cares! Except for snarling after the brothers say the big strong guy they know and love is doing great? (Please tell me she has a height complex with her little brother, please tell me she has a height complex with her little brother…) Anyways, time to explain why they came north. They can’t say much though, while they want to eventually deal with Uncle if they talk about the Goths it could reach the Fuhrer, and then Winry (and Riza) are in trouble. The brothers decide to just talk about the quest to recover their bodies, tracking down May to the north. Major-General Armstrong… calls them Trouble Magnets and tells them to GTFO of her fort. Except that’s what she’d “like” to say but her interest in Alkahestry trumps her irritation with the protagonists. Knowledge is power, and knowing a skill that’s little understood in her home country could be useful in defending its borders. Another weapon for the arsenal… Hoo boy. Al protests that Alkahestry is specialized for medical healing, Major-General Armstrong snaps that- [Major-General Armstrong]: “My job is far more perilous than yours. I will make use of any knowledge that I can get my hands on.” Ok then. I’m getting that people like her attitude and all… but I’m kinda concerned about that line. If her immediate reaction to Alkahestry is “how can I weaponize this”, I’m worried what Major-General Armstrong’s opinion on Philosophers Stones would be. Major-General Armstrong declares that she’ll track down May while the Brothers stay inside the fort, telling Major Miles (is that Sideburns-Guy who’s been by her side all this time?) to put them to work. No work, no food, capiche? Then down the corridor she goes with Buccy, talking about how they’re still “soft and weak”, and that they haven’t told her everything. Major Miles/Sideburns is leading the Brothers somewhere, Ed tries to engage him in conversation but he stays silent. Ed gripes that they keep getting asked questions but don’t get any answers, when Sideburns stops and- Ishvalan! Sideburns is Ishvalan! Ok then! While it’s common knowledge that Ishvalans were purged (yeesh) from the army before the War of Extermination, Sideburns is half-Ishvalan so apparently got to stay in the military as Ed’s country destroyed that of his grandfather. Ed lets out a shaky breath and says Sideburns’ people destroyed the countryside, and one of them murdered his friend’s parents. The two stare eachother down… until Sideburns chuckles? A test? Ed didn’t give him the response he’s used to (shame and pity), but it’s understandable given his complicated relationship with Scar. Wait, attempted kidnapping? When did Scar try to kidnap you, as far as I can remember all your interactions were either trying to kill each other or you using him as Goth Bait. Sideburns seems pleased with Ed’s views, ushers him on while explaining that yes he was active duty during the War, being outside the military purge requirements he stayed while his relatives died in the East. He understandably resented the military’s actions, and was confused as to why Major-General Armstrong would keep him around as a ranking officer given the racial tensions. Eventually he asked her. [Major-General Armstrong]: “This is Briggs. No matter what happens, this territory must not fall. Every soldier here must be both strong and flexible. You must move as one cohesive unit, following me your leader in all things and at all times. In short, we do not have the luxury of discrimination here. The blood of several races flows within you, and with that comes varying strengths and values. You can see this country in a way that others cannot. I was born and raised in Amestris; in order to lead I need someone with your eyes. Now shut up and follow me, Miles! Understood?!” Damn! Sorry, had to include that entire quote. Still worried about the desire to weaponize Alkahestry (and possibly Philosopher’s Stones), but I’ve gotta respect that speech. Pfft! And in addition to that awesome quote, when Sideburns asked if he can’t get over his resentment about the Extermination? [Major-General Armstrong]: *sword drawn* “Fine then, bring it! On behalf of the military I will accept your challenge any time!” Badass in Command for sure. And when Ed speculates that she said that because she had all those troops at her back Sideburns is quick to nope that idea right out. Scary lady is scary. They’re outside now, Sideburns expounding on the Survival of the Fittest culture of Briggs. You don’t have power? Dead. You have it? You might survive. Private or general, all are equal to that rule. And apparently they respect various forms of power, Sideburns notes Ed’s high luck when he trips and dodges a falling icicle. Ok, have to admit my first thought was Sideburns would say “we leave these icicles up because if you get killed from falling ice you’ve got no business at Briggs” to expand on the Survival of the Fittest, but they’ve got more common sense than that. The Brothers are assigned to scrape off the falling threats, after that they’ll get a room. Aw, poor vertically-challenged Ed can’t reach the ice while his little brother knocks them down with ease, when someone who recognizes them walks up. Oh hey, Falman! That’s right, you did get reassigned to the north. Or actually, wasn’t it the Northern Command Center? Apparently he was for a bit, but then promotion and shuffling over to Briggs. Unfortunately despite the shoulder bling the Brothers pick up that doing grunt work like this means he’s off the career track? Come on kiddos, show some tact when noting the middle-aged guy is off the advancement list! I’d run away crying too! After Falman gets it out of his system, he takes Ed and Al to the Research and Development Center, where there are a bunch of guys working on tanks. Seems Major-General Armstrong’s interest in keeping a weapon advantage extends to taking the latest Amestrian technologies and turning them into weapons. So it does extend beyond Alkahestry, then. Hmmm. Now they’re being shown a massive mechanical room, giant red pipes and fans everywhere. Falman says this is the lowest level of Fort Briggs, since Ed comments that it’s warm I’m assuming this is the engineering room that keeps all the toilets in the fort from freezing, as well as several less-important functions. [Falman]: “Even if the fort’s attacked, this area will remain safe.” ...now why did you have to say that, Falman? You know the Irony Gods can’t resist a line like that. Looking around, Ed’s pushed aside by a mechanic who’s inspecting a pipe for an odd noise, then puts his head to the ground when the Ominous Piano starts up. Digging? Spies from Drachma? Uh, the screens starting to shake and the sound is getting louder, if these are spies they are the least subtle spies I have ever seen/heard. Wait. Not Drachma! NOT DRACHMA! WE HAVE GOTH SIGN! Way, way back in the show we saw the Goth Sloth digging somewhere. I guess we know where that is now! But why? Sloth seems to have a deep voice, saying that it’s annoying to do all this digging, but it’d be a pain to die so whatever. Huh, so this Goth’s being interpreted as apathetic? Guess we’ll find out now, there goes the floor! Mid-ep pictures of Major Miles and yup, that’s Sloth. Major-General Armstrong’s getting a report on Kimblee, seems he’s been checked into a hospital after the train battle. She’s upset to hear that he’s free, especially by the Fuhrer’s orders, but that’ll have to wait because alarm! Intruder in the base!

Sloth sloooowly crawls out of the ground, a big hulking brute facing down the engineers and Elric Brothers. Sloth stares… Ed stares… Sloth stares… Ed stares… Sloth falls asleep wait what? Ooookay then. After the Brothers’s outburst Sloth wakes up and they claim they’re just there to research a way to recover their bodies. But Sloth doesn’t care? Doesn’t know them? What, did Sloth just get told to dig a tunnel to Briggs way back when and hasn’t been updated since? Why? Oh for- Buccy! They aren’t Drachman spies! Yes it looks suspicious that they were talking with the Goth, but that’s because they can’t engage it directly! So now that Sloth has finished his tunnel he seems at a loss for what to do, just stumbles forward and tosses aside a pipe segment (that nearly crushes Ed) because it was in his way. So what I’m getting is that Sloth is even more the dumb muscle of the group than Gluttony was. And durable too, the other Goths had to heal from bullet wounds but they’re just bouncing off him. Sloth shambles onto an elevator and bumps into the lever to rise, seems he’s heading to Development. Ooh, do we get to see the tanks in action? Everyone runs upstairs where troops are running around with rifles, and some hapless mechanics are stacking boxes and arming themselves with pipes. Yeah, don’t bother guys. Sloth arrives and they get ready to- [Major-General Armstrong]: “Don’t move!” *Rocket Launcher* Damn! Someone find me a good picture of her pose after that shot. Unfortunately it’s about as effective as the small rounds were, she tosses the useless rocket launcher to a hapless trooper and orders the alarm turned off. Don’t want the Drachmans to catch wind of an opportunity. Drachma this, Drachma that… part of me is imagining that this is a one-sided rivalry. [Imaginary!Drachman #1]: “Hey, do you hear that? Sounds like an alarm going off at the Amestrian fort.” [I!D #2]: “Wait, they’re still staffing that place? We decommissioned our own fort years ago, ever since we found the Light of Leto. I hope they’re ok.” [I!D #1]: “Perhaps we should send someone over to check on them. Ooh, and deliver some pamphlets!” yessss. We’ve got working tanks! Major-General Armstrong orders the fuses removed from the shells, and reassumes the title of Tank Lady as she boards the vehicle, swings her sword, and gives the command. Fire! Headshot, byotch! Sadly, these are Goths we’re talking about, who all raise a massive middle finger at any non-Alchemy means of attack. A shot from a tank shell just scraped Sloth’s cheek away, and it regrew in a matter of seconds. Sloth just gripes that pain is a pain, and stomps forward. Another shot lodges in his gut but is tossed aside and healed even faster, and further shots just bounce off. Damn, he has Adaptive Ability? Sloth’s “back to work” smashing stuff now, sends some boxes and lockers flying which Ed stops with a Transmuted stone hand. Major-General Armstrong notes his protecting her minions, and then Ed runs up to say stop wasting ammo. She demands answers, but Ed can’t answer without explaining about the Goths and violating the Fuhrer’s deal. In the end it boils down to one question: “Are you on our side or are you in league with that thing?” Ed just doesn’t want to see anyone get hurt, so the Major-General sets that aside and orders Buccy to get some tank fuel. I suppose burning did work on Lust, but that was Alchemy. Hmmm, Major-General Armstrong says they can’t stop it, just delay. And they need something stronger than fire? What are you planning? [Major-General Armstrong, smirking]: “Now you get to see the Briggs way, kid.” Oh my Leto don’t you dare aaaaargh. End of episode. Stop cutting me off, damn it! Alright! We’ve gotten some more info on Major-General Armstrong, who I’m still reserving a nickname for until I’ve got some more info on her character. I am really, really liking a lot of what I’ve seen so far, but after her immediate jump on weaponizing Alkahestry and the drive to research and develop new weapons I worry about her response to Philosopher Stones. Hopefully my fears will be unfounded and she can earn a nickname, it’s a real pain to type out Major-General Armstrong all the time. Sloth! Interesting that they went with the apathy aspect of his Sin, seems to be a guy that prefers to follow orders because thinking for himself takes more effort. Definitely got a chuckle when he up and fell asleep facing the Elrics, good humor potential there. And impressively strong, too! Should be a good battle next episode. With him I believe we’ve only got one Goth left unseen, Pride, who’s hanging out in Central with the other Goths and Uncle.

[dolphin-enthusiast]

Matchup? Thanks. I'm a short, straight, cis, white, female from America. I'm a lil bit chunky, well, half of it's chub and the other half is muscle. I enjoy going to the gym and working out, it's pretty great. I started going to lose weight because I used to be obese but I decided to make the change I wanted to see in myself. Yeah, I lost 60 pounds. I'm pretty proud of myself. I'm very confident in myself and show myself a lot of self care because I used to have a lot of self-esteem issues. 🐉

"But now I'm proud of the young woman I've become. I'm 23 and a half and in college. I'm trying to become a clinical psychologist. When I was a kid I wanted to be a psychologist because I have (and have had) ADHD, depression, anxiety, and chronic insomnia. I work at Starbucks, my favorite thing is drawing things on customer's cups, they think it's really cool. I enjoy art, but I still love psychology the most. It's my favorite thing. Most days, I'm a generally nice person. 🐉

I'm laid back and willing to go with the flow. Other days I'm a McGremlin with Mean Hoe Fries on the side. When I don't get along with people, I tend to try to ignore them, but my fuse is shorter than I am. And I am really short. I get aggressive and it is NOT a pleasant sight. When I was in middle school I slapped a kid and told him to tell his mother she was a beautiful woman because he was telling me and a few of our shared friends (he was an acquaintance, my beat friend was his friend) 🐉

how he called his mom a bitch and I slapped him and told him to apologize. I've always respected people who earned it. Even then, I still respect people's lives, but there are some people that only get the bare minimum of my respect. Those tough single moms have all of my respect tho... Another thing about me is that I prefer having male friends than female friends. Why? Some girls like to cause drama. I have a lot of guy friends because I have a really Tom-boyish personality. I love running. 🐉

I do it a lot. I did track in highschool and I still enjoy watching it on the Olympics. I also enjoy martial arts, karate, judo, jujitsu, taekwondo, boxing, and kung fu. I do all of those please help I have a martial arts addiction. I am obsessed about learning. It's amazing. I enjoy learning about new cultures and trying new things. I love books too. I'm currently reading a really good detective one at the moment. I also love the TV show Sherlock, with Benedict Cumberbatch. 🐉

I always try to be the best human I can be??? I'm very bold. Oh! I'm an ENTP Gemini, but did you know, some scientists believe that the MBTI test might be faulty- 🅱️lz don't listen to me I'm annoying. Anyway, my friends describe me as: laid back but energetic at the same time, smart but also lacking in common sense, reckless, brave, caring, hardworking and ready to fight for the people I care about. I guess I would say I'm like that. 🐉

I describe myself as: ambiverted, fun-loving, and indecisive. In a partner, I look for someone who can make me smile, someone who will have my back while I have his. Ya know? Mutual trust and communication, any kind, is valued in a relationship to me. Whether it's sign language, talking, or leaving notes, I need communication to know what he wants. My favorite animals are cats. My favorite color is red. My favorite shows are JoJo and Sherlock. My favorite book is probably the Lord of the Rings.

My favorite band/singer are Lord Huron and Hozier. My favorite character in Sherlock is the man himself because of how blunt and straightforward he is. My favorite JoJo character is Iggy, not because I am a dog person I am a cat person, but because he has an attitude and when I'm grumpy I understand hating everyone. I like rainy weather, but only when I'm inside. I enjoy children, but I will decimate brats with my viper tongue if needed. 🐉 (last time I forgot the dragon!)

My favorite foods are fried chicken and chicken fried steak. Who do you match me with Father Morgyorgy? Pt. 1, 2, or 3 plz."

I match you with...

JOSEPH!

Where do I even begin...your vibes and overall energy instantly attracted him to you. The fact that you're so fun loving and have a strong sense of justice made him be absolutely smitten. He l o v e s energetic people that aren't afraid to stand their ground and that also stand up for others when needed. The fact that you're willing to kill for those that are close to you is something that he can also relate to. When you told him about the efforts that you made to lose weight he was extremely proud of you and told you that you're always beautiful no matter what of course. He's only glad that you're now happy with yourself though.

Just like you he is usually a go with the flow person and is normally chill but he also has his more meaner days and a rather short temper (and much like you when he does pop off for real then it's fucking O N.) While he is a very determined and hardworking person he too can be reckless and lack common sense sometimes. As for what you look in a partner don't worry for he will ALWAYS have your back and will never fail at making you smile. Mutual trust is included too since it's like you two have a language of your own and understand eachother at all times.

He really LOVES your tomboyish personality and actually admires the reasons behind you wanting to become a psychologist. The fact that you also practice so many martial arts is pretty damn amazing to him and he'd often be joking around that you could easily yeet him over your shoulder or immobilize him in two moves.

[artificialqueens]

i’ll be your biggest fan and you’ll be mine (Scyvie) - cokewhore

a/n: hi!!!! this was originally a trixya fic from last december that i found on my wattpad account but i tweaked it a bit to be scyvie because that ship is in some serious drought rn and also!! this is my first aq submission and lowercase is intended but anyways, enjoy!

“hey! give that back!”

“kiss me on the cheek first.”

another normal day at yvie’s little bedroom, the birds outside were chirping even though it was seven pm, so.. maybe they were crickets, or birds, or whatever. neithertheless, they were having fun.

scarlet getting all flirty and playful and all that, it was fine, yvie knew she was joking, there was still the lingering thought of maybe she wasn’t joking at all, but yvie ignores that because scarlet’s her friend, her bestfriend for that fact.

scarlet was waving yvie’s vandalised yet rhinestoned ukulele and waving it around the room and threatening to mess up the tuning heads if she doesn’t get a smooch from one of her cheeks.

yvie was struggling to catch up with scarlet who was running around her room; she couldn’t catch up because of her dumb stomach ache she got because of eating too much junk food earlier.it wasn’t her fault, it was some kentucky idiot’s fault.

her goal was to try and get her customized instrument back without leaving her new red lipstick on anyone’s cheeks, she was failing though. “scarlet, what the hell! just give it back!” she begs, her hand being thrown at the direction of said girl’s arms who were carrying her possesion, awfully failing when scarlet ran to another corner.

“no.” she said simply, her blonde hair stuck to her wet forehead because that’s how long they’ve been chasing eachother, long enough for scarlet to start sweating, well, not very long since she’s known for sweating almost too easily. “kiss me on the cheek, yvieeee.” she stops her tracks, turns her head then leans her right cheek to yvie, cheekily smiling; asking for what she’s been manifesting for for atleast five minutes now. “pleaseeeeee.” she draws out, visibly seeing the roll from her friend’s brown eyes.

“you’re an idiot.” said yvie, crossing her arms across her thin chest while still seeing that scarlet wasn’t going to leave if she didn’t get a kiss. “i’m doing this because i want my ukulele back, not because i wanna kiss your cheek… or anything.” she explains unnecessarily as she pecks her plump lips to her friend’s cheeks, closing her eyes in the process.

she pulled away shortly, acting like she was so bored out of her mind as if that little peck on the older girl’s cheek wasn’t important. “can i have it back now?” she asks, still keeping on her disinterested mask on her face.

“yeah, yeah, whatever.” scarlet hands yvie her instrument, a small blush creeping up to her face as she did, it could be easily mistaken for something else because she was hot and sweating her mind out, but it wasn’t. she sits down to yvie’s bed to where the other one follows.

yvie pulled down the elastic that was holding up her pink hair, it wasn’t doing a very good job of holding her thick hair up because it literally didn’t look and feel like a ponytail anymore so what was the point of keeping it on? she strums her ukulele then feeling her ear drums ache after she heard of what lineup of vibrations came out the sound hole. “you messed up the chords!” she exclaims with a mix of anger and sadness (she’s not actually angry at scarlet, she can’t do that for the sake of her life) desperation shining through when she furiously turns the tuning heads in hopes of the chords’ original sounds coming back.

“no i didn’t.” scarlet found yvie’s desire to get her graffiti ukulele to work amusing, but yvie didn’t find her own struggle entertaining like her best fried did, she was determined to get her dumb ukulele to sound the way it sounded when she was playing her songs in the same spot on her bed late at night, or the way it sounded when she writing down her first song, it was about her sorrow when she found out that scarlet’s mom said that they should stop being friends, that was two years ago though.

her determination left them both in a silence where everything was boring to scarlet, always finding something to be fond of even though there was nothing to interesting enough to pursue interest in, she was used to it, waiting for yvie to finish whatever she was doing because she was always doing something, she was the student government president after all, scarlet has learned nothing but how to put up with her dumb rants about their high school life during their high school carreer.

but to add to the fire, who would listen to someone with pink hair?

yvie shouldn’t have even agreed to being a part of the student government in the first place , she wishes she could resign even though it’s been only four months in but she already hates it because no one takes her seriously, she doesn’t know why though, she’s a great leader, she made scarlet wear a black shirt for a day, that proves something.

it was her fault though, scarlet tried to push her out of this president position but she wouldn’t listen, and now she’s regretting that she didn’t listen. “you’re paying for this.” yvie muttered under her breath, her head still directed to the tuning heads, not looking up one bit to clash with her friend’s blue eyes.

“no i’m not.” scarlet replies simply, stroking yvie’s headboard lightly with her thumb, that’s how bored she was, but she thought she shouldn’t bother yvie since she was so invested in fixing her stupid wood guitar wannabe or whatever, scarlet knew better than not to bother yvie when she’s doing something important, or to bother anyone at all, yes, she’s playful and really touchy and clingy at all times but once she knows it’s time to step back; she will.

so that’s what she’s doing right now, waiting for yvie to finish her ‘pointless’ (atleast in scarlet’s words) tuning and talk to her already, she was taught to be patient, that didn’t always work out but miraculously scarlet’s working with time and actually waiting.

“it actually won’t work and it’s all your fault.” yvie pouts, her fading red bottom lip stuck out from the rest of her face as she spoke with agitation. “i can’t believe this.”

“aww, cheer up, buttercup.” scarlet cooed as she pinches her cheeks, yvie just rolls her eyes, not at scarley, but the stupid nickname she gave her. “i’ll buy you a new one for christmas.” her tone was no joking matter, even though she just said she wasn’t paying for the damage, she was serious, but yvie didn’t catch that and decided to swing with the imaginary gag of scarlet’s words.

“okay, yeah, and you’ll also finally learn how to dance.” yvie retorts, recalling all the times scarlet tried to dance during school events then laughing after she saw how defeated the blonde looked, maybe because her offer was all along fake and not gonna happen to begin with? “see, now you look like a loser because i caught you in your act.” she adds, chunks of boastful undertones paired with her statement to her bestfriend.

“oh please, it wasn’t like i was kidding, bridges.” scarlet will actually buy a ukulele for yvie, it doesn’t matter if the one yvie’s trying to tune turns fine because it looks ridiculous and something a five year old would own, just scarlet’s opinion. she’s doing her a favor more than anything, really. “can you believe me just this once?”

yvie mutters ‘fine’ before focusing on her ukulele for the hundredth time, before communicating with scarlet again, her head still faced on her untuned instrument. “you don’t have to buy me the ukulele, scar.”

scarlet just chuckles at that. “i’m still going to. you can’t stop me.” she says, staring at yvie. “nothing’s ever gonna stop me to buy you a new one.”

“why?”

“because your 'artistic’ one is ugly, to be honest with you.” scarlet states, not caring if yvie gets offended because it was the truth, or her truth anyways because yvie seems to think her truth is a whole load of bullshit.

“that’s crazy talk.” yvie dismisses, not even looking at her friend as she was fixing the chords, she probably shouldn’t go that fast but she is anyways, fully aware that the ukulele itself might break because of how agressive she turns the tune heads.

“your mom’s crazy talk.” she hears scarlet retort and she holds back a laugh as she’s supposed to be focused, she can’t just break her streak of being very intense by that stupid your mom joke.

“i’m telling her.”

after their short banter, it stayed silent, again, well, not really, the air was mostly just correction tuned chords from the messy stoned sound hole, it was getting annoying but scarlet had no say in it, who can she blame? only herself for thinking that messing with the tuneheads was a good idea.

one of them breaks the tranquility, with a groundbreaking question, not really but whatever. “you know i love you, right?” scarlet asks, out of the blue. it isn’t supposed to be taken as romantic, but yvie didn’t know how to take it, she doesn’t know how those words should translate in her brain because they were so heavy in her opinion.

“huh?” yvie doesn’t know if she was hearing things. well, she heard scarlet, she just wasn’t sure if she was hearing her right. “what’d you say, scar?”

“i said i love you.” she said again, this time, she’s looking at yvie and sustaining the contact they hold with their different colored eyes. “you know that, right?”

yvie just widens her eyes, she didn’t know what she meant, but she’ll answer anyways. “y-yeah, ofcourse i do.” she nods rapidly, stuttering too which is rare for her, her face is getting really red too. maybe it’s because it’s really hot in here or maybe… it’s because yvie is being really hot right now. either of the two makes sense. “i love you too.” she adds hesistantly.

scarlet smiles at how flustered yvie is. she didn’t know why scarlet was saying that when she’s been an ass to her so much. (exhibit a: yvie telling at scarlet that she’s a bitch because she messed up yvie’s painting) or all the times she’s made her wait just so yvie can have someone to walk with from school. scarlet has weirdly always been there by her side, no matter how hostile yvie can get sometimes. “i just thought that i should remind you because you do all these things for me, it’s insane but also lovely at the same time.”

“well, i do those things for you because i- i don’t know i- i just like seeing you happy, so…” yvie shrugs, she definitely doesn’t know what she’s talking about, this situation is weird for her. too much seriousness for her, which is kinda hypocritical because the air was as serious as when she was with her ukulele.

“that’s sweet of you, but don’t i get tiring?” scarlet finally looks up to face yvie who’s eyes are still wide and big. “like sometimes i’m annoying and then you know i know i’m being annoying and you get annoyed by it but-“ she was rambling, but yvie didn’t mind, she’d listen to her voice all day. “and like right now i messed up your ukulele. sorry for that, by the way.“

“bitch! i’m even worse! i don’t even know how you put up with me.” yvie suddenly bursts in laughter and seeing scarlet join her in laughing made her happy, everything about her made her happy.

as the laughter died down, scarlet deadpans and says “true.” and yvie immediately drops her face as she was trying to look for a tone of a joker, but her face was not hinting anything.

“wait what-“

“i’m kidding!”

and then she lets out a sigh of relief.

“well, i guess we’re even then.” yvie chuckles, she strums her ukulele again only to find out that it’s finally tuned, thank god. “hey, look! you don’t have to buy me that ukulele anymore.” she beams at scarlet, showing off her teeth which made scarlet mirror her reaction.

she’s never been this confused her entire life because a new wave of feelings came in her, they were so unfamiliar but she swears she’s heard about descriptions of this feeling from her friends, she doesn’t know what it is, but she’ll figure it out soon, and soon because her mind just stopped working when scarlet replied.

“bet.”

[one-twisted-sister]

A useless meeting 

"General Rozland?". A voice came from the opening of the large canvas tent Rozland was currently going over defensive strategies to keep the trolls of the region safe while Neriss threw her tantrum he had hope it would have been over by now but messiahs her and Meenah never back down from each other. Alternia was split into two parts  Alter and Neeah they were never  creative even as wrigglers and to make things even more complicated Meenah had changed the spelling.

Meenah ruled over the left side while Neriss ruled over the right at one point they were like sister but now that they had grown older they saw each other as competition especially over the Limeblood caste. "Yes what is it Kariee?". Rozland asked looking away from the table his hands slipping behind his back, always so noble in everything he did be it even walking to the little messenger. "Um, the Empress Neriss is calling a meeting of all the blooded Generals and their captains, the note says it's urgent". The page was lifted up to the purpleblood whom accepted it his eyes just glancing over the page once before his attention when back to the messenger. "Is this all young one?". When he received a nod he placed a gold piece into the trolls hand, a tip. "Careful on your way back to the palace".  Kariee smiled up at the male giving a nod before scurrying off. Muldun stood from his seat his own hands slipping behind his back. 

"Sir?". "It's a bunch of mumbo jumbo wording, it would have been easier if she had just called over the radio".  Rozland pinched the bridge of his nose. "Muldun tell the group that we will be heading out let the men and woman know that Yonten is in charge until our return they are calling the annual meeting early this time". Rozlan answered  as he grabbed his coat that had been hung on the back of one of the chair that surrounded the table.

In minutes the Generals and Captain's steed were ready for the travel.  "Easy boy". Roz cooed to the hoofbeast as his gloved hand pat it's nose, he always had a way of calming the beasts down everyone had always assumed it was an indigo thing but well Rozland had done proved that wrong, Muldun came closer to the second horse though he stopped in his tracks as it stomped it's hooves obviously not liking the fact that the purpleblood was so close to it. "Hold still you stupid..". "Everything aright?". "Ah- yes sir the  beast is just being a little difficult". He watched as Rozland only chuckled. "Well perhaps if you spoke more kindly to them they would like you better". Muldun was silent he never understood this man, he never seemed to get angry even on the battle field he kept his cool then again when ever they had been on the battle field it had always been about defense, it was always defense.

Defending the land and the useless live that lived inhabited it the man had so much power behind those base walls that Muldun was more than certain that Rozland could have easily torn apart the lowblood caste. The purpleblood saddle up on the not so happy steed and took off side by side with the General.  It didn't take long for them to reach the Hidden Colosseum a place that Neriss had the Indigo's build a fitting place if there ever was one, it was located within a large cavern much like the one that the Jadebloods occupied some say that this meeting hall was once a Jadeloods brooding cavern but with the rising water and the amount of traffic via the sea they had relocated the Mother Grub somewhere more quiet.   A water fall hid the entrance to the Hall  which is how it got it's name obviously , once they had arrived Rozland dismounted his steed his boots making small thuds against the stone below in the distance he could see two sea ships tied off bobbing up and down with the surf that told him that both the Cobalt and Violet Generals had already arrived atop a mountain sat two large ships made for traveling through space and galaxies. Muldun soon came to Rozlands side eyeing each ship.

"I see that Greely, Vahbiz are on time for once ". "Some nerve". Both purples turned to see the Violet General, Vahbiz walking free from the vegetation hands pulling the zipper of his trousers up apparently having gone to relieve himself he made his way over to the water squatting down to wash his hands. "So rude talking about me behind my back tsk tsk Mully figure your lusii taught you better".  Muldun growled and slapped his hands over his face. "I fucking told you to stop calling me that!, call by my proper name you finned buffoon". "Muldun relax don't start anything that you either don't intend on finishing or can't handle". Rozland scolded turning to face the Violetblood as his arm slipped around Rozlands. "You tell him Rozzy". The Viloletblood snickered a cheek being rested against the large Purples arm, he didn't seem to pay no mind and allowed the Violetblooded General to escort him behind the waterfall. "Now that you are the fun can begin". Vahbiz purred, though a loud frustrated growl echoed through the cavern, that growl belonging to none other than Meenah herself or as she now preferred The Condesce. "Sounds like the fun as already started". Rozland commented his voice having a fake tired tone to it. As the three entered the main hall both Neriss and The Condesce were standing glaring at each other though their eye's and everyone else for that matter turned to them, Vahbiz letting go of Rozlans arm making his way back over to Dulscar whom was the General of the Violetbloods beside him stood Darkleer and Greely.

"Bout' time brothers". Came a deep raspy voice Kurloz lumbered over to the two his walk was slow, almost as slow as the grin that appeared in his face showing off each and every razor sharp tooth he to went by other names one being 'Grand Highblood' of course Rozland didn't see anything 'gand' within the man he deemed himself a speaker for the messiahs that they spoke through him and deliver their messages to his brother's and sisters seems that every generation had their ideas and beliefs in their messiahs it almost made Rozlands heart ache he still followed the old ways of the messiahs, the true messiahs. They stood eye to eye as Kurloz offered a hand, of course Rozland didn't want to be rude so he accepted the hand the hold being firm the shake stiff. There wasn't bad blood between them they had known eachother or a decent amount of time in their youth Rozlan had tried several times to get Kurloz to reconsider his violent ways to seek help for his out bursts of rage but his efforts were fruitless the fact that he took the job of Meenah's enforcer only proved it. Letting go Rozland too to Neriss's side of the table standing along side her Violet and Indigo Generals Raahid and Pahara.

"Ladies, if we are done yelling at each other, may we know why you have gathered us here today?". Rozland asked his hands folding together behind his back. "Yes of course we can finish the previous discussion later, Meenah". "Condesce". The other corrected through clenched fangs her fins giving a little wiggle. "What ever". The Condesce cleared her throat stand up straight. "Okay listen, it seems that the Saint's council isn't gonna be joining forces wit us anytime soon, matter a fact seems Lime boi turned down Ner's advances". The Condesce couldn't help but laugh. "LIME BOI SHUT YO AS DOWN GURL!". Neriss growled  her face growing a dark maroon. "Oh put a sock in it bubbles!". She huffed  sinking down into her seat, Rozland even rolled his eyes he had almost forgotten how annoying the Neeah's people spoke or more importantly how annoying Meenah's voice was in general.  "Okay!, anyway since Limeboi ain't gonna be joining either of our sides and he is a potential threat he must die then me and Ner here got to thinkin what's keeping any of the other lime's from jumping up and taking his spot we already got that little candy red speck trying to rile the lowbloods up so we came to an agreement". The Condesce's eyes caught sight of a small beetle that was scurrying across the table, picking it up between her thumb and pointer holding it up, the little animals legs flailing about trying to find the ground before it was squished to death between her fingers. "Cull them all, first the Limebloods and then the lowbloods and mutants".

She rubbed her finger's together before she moved to wipe them clean on Kurloz pant leg, the man didn't even grimace or move one would guess that he was used to her wiping things on him. "So that's it?, this is why you called us out here?". Rozland spoke up his hands moving from behind himself so he could cross his arms, not at all pleased. "You want me to kill someone, no several castes just because they do not see eye to eye with you and have different beliefs?". The Condesce and Neriss exchanged looks before their attention was once again on Rozland and Muldun whom looked just as shocked, he thought it was a good plan of course.

"Well, yea pretty much". Neriss confirmed watching as he closed his eye's for a moment to keep his composer rolling his shoulder's. "Well then I'm done here". He turned on a heel heading to the Colosseum's door, Muldun looking back and forth obviously lost for words what the hell was Rozland doing?!, Neriess stood from her seat. "General if I were you I would stop right there and return to your spot". "Well you are not now are you? Neriss, I refuse to mindlessly slaughter the masses for what they and whom they believe in plus culling an entire caste just because one didn't want anything to do with you is pathetic". Neriss stared, everyone did none of them had ever heard Rozland speak ill of someone even The Condesce.  Kurloz was the first to approach Rozland  a hand being placed on his shoulder. "Brother come now, let's not be throwing around those vibes the Messiahs done told me that-". "Enough".  Rozland cut the other purple male off shaking his hand off before turning to him. "Your fake Messiahs have told you nothing". He held a glare, the normally calm, cool and collected Rozland glared at the other highblood, Kurloz stared at him with his lazed look no one could ever tell what was on the clowns mind or what he would do exactly why The Condesce had put him in charge she believed she had control over him or rather he let her believe that she had some control over him for the time being.

"All of you youth's out there have your ideas on what the mirthful ones want or what they say, you make your own visions of them twist them to make you feel right and that your acts are righteous in their eyes, well let me tell you Kurloz this is not what our messiahs would want, not how they are and deep down you damn well know it boy you are doing the Horror Terror's work here and I will have no part of it". He could see it, that soft glow of anger creeping into Kurloz eye's Rozland stood his ground. "Kurloz". Came The Condesce voice making the clown turn around and look at her.

"Let him leave, but be warned Rozland, if you leave and do not side with us then there will be no help from any of us". "Then let it be so". He spoke turning his back on the bunch. "Muldun let us go ". "Muldun". He spoke again a bit louder, he had been talking with Neriss softly, whispering before Rozlands voice broke his attention, it being taken from her. "Yes of course General".  Muldun gave an understanding look to Neriss a nod following it as he turned to leave with Rozlan.  All watched as the two vanished from sight before speaking. "You are a fool Rozland and you shall pay for your actions here today". The Condesce spoke before she turned back to Neriss allowing the meeting to continue without Neriss Purpleblood General and Captain.

[themarchblessing]

ACERCA DE TU MADRE

COREY

Beating on Brian’s door I continuously made my presence known waiting to see how annoyed he would get.

“Yo come the fuck on man! It’s early in the fucking morning!” He bitched. The door swung back and so did his fist. I caught it before he could get too close to my face laughing at how tired he looks. “Fuck is so funny?” He groaned nodding me inside.

“Yo ugly ass face and that childish ass temper. It’s going on one in the afternoon mother fucker, what’s got you so dead?” I asked going straight to his kitchen. I grabbed an apple throwing it at him knowing he wouldn’t see it coming. I also grabbed one to eat.

“What kind of magic pussy got you glowing like a fucking rainbow?” He chuckled staring at me across the counter.

Shrugging like I don’t know what he’s talking about I ate the apple in silence.

“Nigga I know you. You’ve been getting some ass on the regular from somebody and you’re not telling me. You’re a good liar but you used to be better.” Brian and I had a stare down only to share a laugh toward the end.

“Leave me alone B. Don’t worry about the pussy I’m getting. Are you getting any?” I eyed him with an arched brow.

He nodded to his room and that’s when I heard movement and a girl talking. He silently told me to wait as he dipped off and shut the door behind him. I made myself comfortable with his food and his home. So to sum to all that’s been going on Lori and I have been fucking every other day for the past month or so. The sex hasn’t changed from the morning after we went out and neither has anything else. I think she’s got my head in the clouds. Brian was onto something about magic pussy. That exactly what Sabrina has. Magic, beautiful, mind blowing pussy. It’s so crazy because I never thought that my wildest dream could become true.

I’m not sure what it is that we’re doing. But selfishly I like it for what it is. She’s still my friend. But she’s also how I get my rocks off. Sex with her takes my mind off of everything else. The only thing I seem to comprehend is that I get to revel in the company of my family a lot more these days. It’s like that night at the club pushed us in the direction we’re in now. As happy as I am to have what we have now I still feel guilty that I haven’t been truthful with her.

Opening the message she sent me this morning after she left I scanned over it smiling at how corny she is.

Lori: I miss u and we were just up there not even five minutes ago, what have u done to me Corey Howard????

To Lori: dick got your mind running in circles don’t it? when you coming back to me?

“Well this is a nice surprise.” A voice said from behind me. I turned around seeing an old face.

“Wow. It’s good to see you again. What are you doing around these parts? How you been though girl?” Standing up to give Carli a proper hug I saw Brian coming out of the room pulling a shirt over his head.

“I've been good. Med school is kicking my ass but I’m making it.” She smiled proudly.

Holding my chest in shock I took my seat back on the couch. “Med school huh?”

Carli sat down in the single seater couch, crossing her legs and buttoning her sweater down. “Yep. By this time in May of next year I’ll officially be a licensed cardiologist. The workload is a bitch but I’ve come too far to quit. How have you been Corey? I see you haven’t let go of my dumbs ass of a boyfriend.” She snickered.

“Living the dream. Wait..did you say boyfriend? Don’t tell me he’s hitting it raw? You need to make him work it Carli.” Kicking my feet up on the table I opened my messages back up.

“Oh I make his ass work for it don’t you worry. Excuse me for a second.” She left the room just as Bri was calling.

“You are a real comedian.” She giggled off the bat.

“But I’m right thought. What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Crossing my arm over my chest I listened to her move around.

“No nothing is wrong. I’m just so swamped with clients. I’m tired and I need a vacation. I can’t take Zay out of school but I need time to recoup, destress..” she sighed deeply.

“I don’t help you destress enough? I’m your personal physical therapist, psychiatrist and whatever the fuck else you need me to be aren’t I?” Sabrina laughed at my idiotic comment.

“Yes you’re all of those things Corey. I just need a change in scenery that’s all. I’ve got some vacation time I want to use. Can you getaway for a few days? If you don’t want-” Shutting her up I went to step out on the fire escape.

“I’ll take you anywhere you want to go. When do you want to leave? Tomorrow?” I asked.

“Thursday. I need to get some things in order for Zay and arrange for him to stay with Ray’s mom. I don’t even know where I want go. I haven’t been on my traveling status like you big boy so I’m kind of rusty.” Making a mental note in my head I leaned on the railing welcoming the breeze.

“Come over tonight. Or better yet let me come over. We’ve been busting up my mattress a lot lately. I need a change in scenery too, we’ll figure out where to go then. Is that ok with you?” Looking behind me I saw Carli and Brian telling me to come inside.

“Okay, you can come home with me tonight. I’d love to have you in my bed. Oh baby I miss you so much.” I detected a smile over the phone that made me do the same.

“It’s a date then. Look I gotta go but call me if you need anything and I’ll see you later.” Stepping back inside I shut and locked the door.

“I’ll keep that mind.” We ended our call. Sliding my phone in my pocket, I followed these two out in the hall. I have no idea what we’re about to get into but I hope I get free food.

“Another round?” The waitress asked.

“Yes please, thank you.” Brian smiled handing her some money. Brian and I have been giving Carli a tour of our home since she’s not from these parts. I’ve been keeping close track of the time so I can make sure to pick little man up from school on time. I volunteered for this responsibility and I like it. It gives me the chance to spend time with my son and embrace that fatherly role head on. Izaiah having my middle name as his first is beyond heartwarming. When Bri confessed to me what Zay’s name is and the root of it I couldn’t believe what she said. Even with miles between us and a two different time zones, she never forgot about me. And to my knowledge Zay doesn’t know that little piece of information yet. Maybe Bri and I can tell him together when she’s ready.

The waitress came back to the table with three drinks, setting them down easily. “There you guys are.” She left with Carli and Brian downing their shots in seconds.

“What’s wrong bro?” Brian asked taking me of my thoughts.

“What?” I sighed checking my watch again.

“I’m gonna step out. I gotta check on my mom.” Carli left the table leaving us be.

“Corey? What’s the matter man? You’ve been in your head for a minute now. What’s up with you? Who’s fucking with your head?” The concern in my nigga’s voice reassured me that he still cares about my well being.

Running my hands down my face I set my phone on the table and decided it’s time to come clean. “Sabrina. And she’s not fucking with my head, she’s just fucking me. Real good too. I figured out a little while ago that that Izaiah is my son but I haven’t told Bri told yet and I’m scared to. She’s not a spiteful woman so I doubt she’d take my son away from me. But me coming forward about what I did seven years ago might really upset her. The last thing I want her to do is be mad at me but I gotta expect the worst.” Taking a breath I watched Brian flip through emotions while staring at me dead pan.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me get this straight. You have a son with Sabrina but she doesn’t know it? You have a kid? You two are fucking but you’re still just friends? What the fuck man?! Why haven’t you told me any of this my nigga? We tell eachother everything..I’m your brother..” Brian tapped his fist angrily on the table staring at me with curious eyes.

“You don’t think I know that? It’s all confusing even for me. But yes that’s all of it. I’ve been trying to wrap my head around all this ever since I met up with Eva to confirm what I’ve been hearing. You, my dad, the woman on the train and every stranger that’s commented on the similarities between that little boy and I were right. I know for a fact Sabrina hasn’t picked up on anything. My life has changed Brian. A lot.” I explained seeing Carli come back in.

“Damn. You have a kid? This shit is crazy. Am I gonna get to meet him?” Brian pulled out Carli’s chair for her.

Nodding surely I messed around with the liquor still not interested in drinking it. “Yeah you’re gonna meet him. I just need to get some things in order first. It’s just crazy man. I completely forgot about that night at her birthday. If Eva had never met up with me I would��ve never got the answers I wanted. I was drunk off my ass at Bri’s party, I found the place she was holding onto that nigga sperm and ended up replacing it with mine. Why? Because my stupid ass spilled everything and called Eva to help me out so I could switch his..you know with mine. That’s how it happened. It’s the craziest fucking story but it’s the truth.”

The look on Carli’s face when she sat down humored me. She came back at the wrong time.

“Can I ask what you guys are talking about?” She asked shyly.

“Um..how I unknowingly became a dad at a party seven years ago that I had no recollection of until recently.” I summed up in a nutshell.

“You’re a dad? Aw that is so cute. What’s he like? Does he look like you?” Carli cooed with her hands folded under her face.

Opening up my pictures I pulled one up showing it to her. She scrolled for a minute with a sappy ass smile on her face.

“He’s so beautiful Corey and I definitely see him in you. Congratulations, daddy.” She chuckled making us all do it too.

“Thanks Carli. He makes happy in a way I can’t even explain. And don’t get started his mother. Man..” I can’t wait to see Sabrina tonight. I can’t wait to kiss her, I can’t wait to hug her, I can’t wait to see her smile, and I definitely can’t wait to blow her back out.

“Is that a fucking smile at the mention of her name? Are you blushing? You said y’all were just fucking but you’re in love brother. You love her and don’t lie to me.” Brian leaned across the table staring me down intensely.

Pushing his face back jokingly I checked the time again. “Leave me alone. Hey I gotta go but y’all be safe and enjoy the rest of your day ok? I’ll holla at you later B.” Leaving money on the table I stood up and put my jacket on. “See you later Carli, good to have you back and take care of this fool when I’m not around.” I left the bar and caught a cab back to Brian’s to retrieve my car. I got in quickly heading towards the school thinking about the day I got arrested and Zay taken from me. That was not only embarrassing but it scared me shitless. I don’t ever want to see my kid taken from me ever again for as long as I’m living.  When I put two and two together that Nikole planted that coke on me I felt my soul yearn to make sure she gets hers. But just having Izaiah back with Sabrina and that whole incident put behind us made me think. I’m too old now and I’ve got way too much to lose over some heartbroken, bitter ex of mine.

The anticipation of seeing Zay tempted me to speed but I controlled myself so I don’t get caught up again but with a real charge this time. When I got to his school I parked close so he’d see my car. I stood outside hoping not to attract too much attention to myself. After that day I’ve been keeping a low profile from these nut ass teachers. I don’t want to hear shit they have to say unless it’s about my son’s safety, education, and well-being. Spotting Izaiah in a crowd of kids I waited until they cleared out to walk closer so he didn’t have to come this far alone.

“Hey! You made it!” He grinned throwing himself into me.

I hugged him back turning to bring him over to the car. “How was school kid? Anybody mess with you?” Opening the door I helped him inside to get settled for this drive. Before we go to his moms I want to stop somewhere first.

“School was okay and no. Nobody bothered me. How was your day?” He rebutted buckling himself in. Checking to make sure he was all straight I closed the door and jogged around to the drivers side, hopping in fast. I put the car in drive and took off towards the city to do a little shopping.

“My day was okay. I went to see a friend of mine and that was about it. Let me ask you something Zay..” looking in the mirror I was glad to see him fully focused on me. “Does your mom talk to Julian a lot? Does he ever come by the house at all?” I asked.

“No. I never see him that much. I don’t really like him. He makes me uncomfortable.” Zay scrunched his face up in disgust.

Trying not to laugh I jumped on the highway to avoid the street lights. Zay and I bugged out the entire ride. We talked about a lot too. I swear spending time with him is like a blast from my own past. He’s so much like me and doesn’t even know it. We touched down on 5th Avenue and once I found a parking spot I exited the car and went to get Zay out from the back seat.

“Where are we going Corey?” He asked holding onto my hand as we walked towards the other side of the street.

“Well little man I need to do what I call early Christmas shopping.” Stopping by a trashcan I bent down to secure the switchblade strapped to my ankle. I also had to make sure the strap in the back of my pants was covered. Keeping a firm hold on Zay’s hand I stood to my feet, guiding him to our first stop.

“Are we shopping for mom?” He assumed.

“Yes. Do you pay attention to your mom and what she likes?” I want to pick his brain to see what he’s picked up on with his mother. I want to know what she’s like when I’m not around. Based on my own history with her I know the types of material things she likes most. But does our son pick up on anything?

“She loves shoes and jewelry and purses too. She really likes clothes but I don’t know much about that. I help her pick out her new clothes sometimes when she takes me the store with her.” He said as we reached Saks. I opened the door and walked in behind him with my hand to the back of his head.

Going over to the counter I grabbed a woman’s attention who just got off the phone. “Hi there, how can I help you?” She asked.

“Yeah I called a few hours ago about some items I wanted put on hold for my wife.” I began. I looked down to see Izaiah looking around the store with curiosity radiating off of him as to what’s all here.

“Oh yes that’s right. What we’re calling about? I want to make sure we get you everything you need.” I went through the list of shoes and handbags I requested watching her head off to the back afterward. I also asked her to gift wrap each item too so Sabrina can’t see what everything is right off the bat.

“This is all for mommy? Why buy her so much?” Izaiah asked sitting next to me on the chair.

“I do this all the time for your mom Zay. She’s not the type of girl to ask for anything, she just works hard for what she wants and buys everything herself. She probably will never tell you this but we have a weird relationship. She doesn’t have to do anything, I just spoil her because I want to. I love taking care of her and getting whatever she needs and wants.” Seeing the woman come over to me with five boxes and two bags I met her halfway and took them off her hands.

“Your wife is a very lucky woman. Thank you so much for choosing us to bless her with these gifts, I know she will love them. And I’m so glad we could help you Mr. Howard.” She smiled.

“I don’t doubt that she will and thank you.” Turning around I saw Izaiah going over to the door to hold it open for me. “Thanks kid.” We walked back to my car so I could put these bags inside and afterward we went right back to another store. If there’s one lesson I can hopefully teach my kid it’s to treat the woman you care about with the highest level of respect. My dad taught me the values of being a man and how treat women. He told me to never let my woman forget how special she is to me. I’m always good with my words and actions but I like spoiling the women in my life if they’re worthy of it.

Sabrina and every other girl from my past got close to the same amount of treatment. If I’m treated how I’m supposed to be then I give it right back. If not, well fuck you. But for Sabrina, I’ll do anything for her. I always have. Her past boyfriends have all been jealous of me because of how close we were. We never fucked around back then. When she was seeing somebody I didn’t blow up her phone, stop by unannounced, or make it obvious that I took care of her in ways her niggas didn’t. I never made a pass at her. I came to her when she asked me to and respected every relationship she ever had before ours. The respect we’ve carried for one another while in and out relationships over the years has been equal. That’s never changed. She treats me nice so I return the courtesy back to her.

By the time Zay and I finished up going in and out stores it was after eight o’clock. I took him out to eat to take a weight off Bri’s shoulders. I do all that I can because I genuinely care about him. Nobody but my father, Eva, Carli and Brian know of his relation to me. No matter how long it takes me to come clean I’m going to own up to my responsibility as a father. I don’t need guidance on how to take care of him when it’s just us two. He tells me everything that I could possibly need to know about him as far as the basics go. Anything else I learn through Sabrina.

“That pizza was so good! I like mushroom on pizza now, thanks for the advice. Mom hates mushrooms so much so I don’t ever have to share that pizza with her..” Izaiah laughed as I pulled into Sabrina’s driveway.

“Oh yeah? I’m glad you liked it. You ate four slices of pizza boy how the hell did you manage that?” Shutting my car down I went around to the other side to get Zay out of the back.

“I had a lot of room for the food. What can I say?” He refuted, closing the door on his side. I took out all of the bags and handed some of the lighter ones to him.

“And I bet you’ll eat again if your mama asks you if you’re hungry won’t you?” Teasing him is so much fun.

“I just might. Did you call mom to tell her we’re here?” He asked as walked up to the front door.

“Yeah I called her. I hope she’s still up.” Pulling out my phone I told Zay to knock on the door while I waited to see if Bri would pick up the phone.

“I’m coming!” We heard her yell getting closer to the door. Sliding my phone in my pocket I looked at the sky seeing that it’s pitch black out. The door opened up and we were face to face with Sabrina wearing a bathrobe. Clearly we interrupted her. “Come on, I’m freezing.” She hid behind the door so we could walk inside. Zay sat down the bags he was holding by the door and shut the door behind us. “Where have you guys been? What is all of this?” She shivered closing her robe tighter.

“We went shopping. I missed you mama.” Zay ran to her, hugging her with a death grip.

“Aw baby I missed you too. I missed both of you. How was school?” She looked up at me and mouthed a ‘thank you’. Nodding, I walked to her room placing the bags on the floor by her bed. The scent coming from the bathroom peaked my interest. I went in to see that she was in the middle of setting a bath for herself. She’s got candles and incense burning. Even the oil burner is going to.

“Same old Sabrina.” I mumbled going back to her room. I took the blade out of my shoe, the gun from out the back of my pants and set them in the top drawer of her dresser out of Izaiah’s reach. Next I stripped down until I was comfortable placing my clothes on an empty chair.

Sabrina has a lot to open so to make this process easier I separated the boxes from the bags and lined them up across her bed.

“Thank you once again for picking him up.” She said from behind me. Looking over my shoulder I turned around to see her robe slipping from her shoulders.

Taking a seat on her bed I tiredly waved her over. She immediately hugged me, her robe fanning open. “Tired?” She slid her hands in the back of my shirt, rubbing my back and shoulders without me having to tell her I’m in pain.

Lazily I wrapped my arms around her waist, closing my eyes to block out any source of light. “Physically. How was the rest of your day?” I questioned, groaning at how amazing she is with her hands.

“Kind of hectic. I don’t want to talk about work ok?” She picked up my head and caressed the side of my face with care. “You’re staying tonight right? Like we discussed earlier on the phone?” The inquisitiveness in her face and voice clarified where Izaiah gets that trait from. Straight from the source.

Nodding yes I picked her up off the floor and onto my lap. Brushing some loose strands of hair from her face I silently counted my blessings for this woman in front of me.

“What’s wrong? Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something you want to tell me?” She searched my eyes back and forth tickling my sense of humor at how curious and concerned she is. Forever in her mommy role.

“No baby I’m fine. I just like looking at you. Sometimes it doesn’t feel real.” I admitted, kissing her exposed chest and neck.

“Mmm..” she moaned running her fingers through my hair. “Esto es real. Tú y yo. Entiendes?” She exhaled sinking further into my lap.

“I hear you. Where’s Izaiah?” Backing up to see her face again I removed the clip from her hair, placing it on the bed behind me.

“He’s in the bathtub. I told him I’d be back. Did you guys eat already? I wasn’t sure if either of you had.” She kissed my forehead saving my lips for last.

“Yeah we did. Did you?” I returned the concern and stood up to place her on her feet.

“Yeah I’m fine. Do you want to help Izaiah get ready for bed for me? It’d mean a lot to me.” She stared at me with pleading eyes knowing she didn’t really have to ask that.

“I don’t mind. Go finish getting your bath ready, I’ll come back when I’m done.” Ushering her off to the bathroom I left the room to see what Zay was up to. I found him sitting on the edge of the bathtub with his towel wrapped around his body. Knocking on the door he looked up at me hugging himself tighter. “You ok?” Going in I picked him up off the rim and carried him down to his room.

“Yeah I’m all done. Is mom taking her bath now?” He shivered laying his head on my shoulder. Cutting on the light to his room I went to his closet to find him something to wear to bed.

“Yeah she’s in there right now. What you want to wear to bed?” I helped him pick out something to wear and got him dressed. He’s now sitting in my lap messing with and examining my watch. I adore that he’s fascinated with the littlest things. Since I’ve only got one free arm I used my available hand to sort the his curls like Bri continues to tell me after he gets his baths. I don’t complain or argue with her I just take heed to the advice and follow through.

“Has she opened her presents?” Zay asked setting my arm down and holding still so I could finish sorting through his hair. I picked up the towel, being gentle with taking out some of the water so he doesn’t soak his pillows.

“Not yet. I’ll have her open them once she’s in bed. She needs to get off her feet first. Go find you some socks to put on.” Setting him on his feet I watched him open the third drawer from the top and pull out a blue pair of socks. I saw the words ‘San Diego Zoo’ written on the sole of each halve.

Zay climbed up on the bed and rushed to slide his feet into the socks with no second thought.

“Wait..” pushing the lotion in his direction I laughed at his frown as he removed the socks and put lotion on both feet. When he put the socks back on I heard Sabrina talking. I’m not able to make out what she’s saying but I know she’s talking to someone or herself. “I’ma go check on your mom ight? Do whatever you want but stay in here or else she’s gonna be nagging us at the same time about how you aren’t in bed. You understand?” Kissing the crown of his head stood up and stretched my limbs.

“Corey..”

Turning around I dropped my arms and shoved my hands in my pockets. “What’s up?”

“Thanks for taking care of me and my mom.” Izaiah stood at the edge of his bed outstretching his arms to pull me into him. “I love you.” He mumbled turning his head to the side so he didn’t suffocate in my chest.

“I love you too man. I always will.” We hugged for another minute separating to do our own thing. Leaving his room I walked down the hall thinking about what he just told me. I wonder how my parents felt the first time I told them ‘I love you’. I didn’t put any thought into wanting to hear Zay tell me how he feels about me. But now that he has I feel really good about the growth of our relationship. “Lori?” Pushing her bathroom door open I went to disturb her knowing she would just get freaked out.

“You’re not scaring me this time. I heard you come in. Izaiah’s in bed?” She asked curling her legs up to her chest tipping her head back to get a good look at me. I stood behind her looking at her face upside down.

“Yeah he’s in bed. I told him he can do whatever as long as he doesn’t leave the room. I hope that’s okay. Sometimes I don’t know what to tell him when he’s here because I don’t want go around whatever routine you usually stick with.” Getting down to her level I kissed her, holding the sides of her face.

“Don’t worry about that. We don’t have any established routine.” Sabrina ended her bath and took a shower with me where we got in one round since the water would help drown out any noise coming from her.  Once we were done I gave her specific instructions not to put any clothes on. I bought something from earlier that I want to see her in.

The bathroom door opened up and out came Bri wearing a different robe.

“Ok, what’s with the no clothes rule?” She instantly asked walking over to the bed, not bothering to sit down. I slid the smallest box over to her watching her open it and take everything out. This first box contains four different color lingerie pieces. I didn’t need any help picking these out from the associates at the store. I went around Bri to found out what size she is and found the perfect what they call ‘teddy’s’ for her. “Babe..why did you get me four? And how did you know what colors to get?” She looked in awe over everything.

“I just went with what I think would look good with your skin tone. Go put the black one on.” I suggested, reaching across the bed and separating the piece I want to see her in tonight. Sabrina hid out in the bathroom while I waited for her reveal herself. The door opened back up and I swear just seeing her in this is making my mind go to some dark places. “You like it or no? You can be honest Sabrina.” I advised standing up and walking over to her.

Grabbing her hand I spun her around in a slow twirl to get a good look at her. Damn she is one fine piece of ass. I mean that respectfully.

“I love it. It’s prefect and it’s surprisingly very comfortable for lace. You did good.” Sabrina patted my back, walking to the bed, going to open more boxes. I stood behind her just admiring the view. “Oh my goodness..look at this..” She exclaimed.

Breaking my stare of her ass I came to realize she was holding one of the purses up in the air . I never moved from this spot just so I can watch her open her gifts like it’s Christmas morning. When she had everything lined up across the bed she turned around to face me.

“Come here..” She hummed reaching for my hands. I closed our distance glancing at all that I bought her. “I love you so much you know that right?” She smirked toying with the hem of my shirt.

“I know you do.” I replied just to be a smart ass.

”Listen to me and listen to me good, I love you not because you buy me things, expensive things at that. It’s because you really know how to treat women Corey. Thank you for everything. I love the bags, I really love the shoes and this..” She touched the outfit she had on. “These are so beautiful. I just have one question though..” She yawned, taking my shirt up and over my head.

Dropping my arms I pushed her back to the point she was laying on top of her things. “What’s that?” I mumbled, lowering my body to trap her in place. I went straight for her neck attacking her warm skin with kisses. Sabrina has really sensitive skin so she can only use one kind of soap. I don’t know where she gets it from but I love that it smells like strawberries. And when she uses it, she smells like strawberries and vanilla. It never fails to turn on me now that I get to enjoy her on a more intimate level.

“How much?” She moaned, slipping her hands in between us to unbutton my pants.

“It doesn't matter. Hold that thought..” I groaned wishing I didn’t have to stop. Standing up on my feet I held onto my pants to run down the hall to check on Zay. Sabrina and I are still figuring out what we’re doing and that means Izaiah can’t see me pushing up on his mom. Let alone fucking her so we have to be careful at all costs. At least until we can figure out what to tell him. He was lying on his stomach sound asleep, snoring lightly. “Just like your old man.” I mumbled to myself. I cut his tv off, his light and left his door open a little so he’s not completely in the dark.

Quietly I went back to Sabrina’s room shutting her door behind me.

“I really really like this one..” She said closing a box. I turned to see her wearing a different outfit that made my dick jump. She chose the pink one that has no sleeves, all lace.

Locking the door I dropped my pants and threw them on the chair with my other clothes. “But pink isn’t your color though right? Tell another lie.” Laughing with her at the memory I closed in on her picking her up off the floor before she could do or say anything.

“Certain shades of pink don’t look good on me, that’s what I said.” She corrected herself as I laid her down with ease. Izaiah telling me that he loved got me thinking. About everything and what the future holds. “Hey..” Bri cupped my face in her hand with a serious look of concern on her face. “What is it now?” She sat up from underneath me, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“He told me he loved me. And I don’t know why but it kind of scared me.” Laying down next to her I tucked my hands behind my head watching Bri lean on me.

“Why?” She whispered.

“I have no idea. I know I probably shouldn’t care much but I feel like I’m lying to him about what we are. And I know that we haven’t figured out much but I think for his sake we should.” Lifting Bri onto my lap I relaxed and let her take charge doing whatever she wants.

Reaching over to her bedside table, Lori picked up a rubber band, tying her hair into a high ponytail. “We will figure this out ok, you and me. But in order for that to happen you need a clear head and that’s where I come in. So just relax, I don’t want to hear another word out of your mouth unless you’re doing what I tell you. Entiendes mi amor?” She advised sternly.

I tried sitting up but she slapped both hands on my chest making me lay back. “Yes ma’am.” I groaned.

“That’s what I thought.” She smirked, stripping me of my clothes, throwing everything to the floor. She took her time warming me up for what’s coming my way. I never took my eyes off of her. I barely flinched at the feel of her nails tickling my inner thigh. My dick in the comfort of her mouth is the perfect start to a wonderful night.

[porcelainschizopanic]

I believe, Cheating can happen within love.

But also without.

It's up to you and your relationship to make the distinction.

It's human nature, to be attracted to people. Whether that be the person you're with - or a stranger walking down the street.

We notice people that fit our definition of attractive.

harmless, if you keep it at simply just. Noticing that person is attractive and leaving it there.

Temptation is everywhere, It's hard to ignore. And most of us at one point or another fail to ignore it.

So what exactly does that mean?

That we don't love the person we are with?

That we dont love ourselves?

Or maybe its just right place, wrong time, bad judgement.

Or possibly we are gaining something from the person we are cheating with...

First; We should define cheating.

"act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage, especially in a game or examination"

By that definition Cheating is more than the act of sex with another person. If you have messages to another you know would be inappropriate if your partner saw. You're already there.

There's a thin line between friendly, and flirty.

When you're deleting things so your lover never finds them is it out of deception ? or is it out of protection. You don't want to hurt your lover. So ask yourself, Why are you doing these things that WOULD. Why must you cover your tracks to protect them?

The reality is Cheating isnt always a malicious act, However more times then not. it is a hurtful act.

People cheat for a number of reasons. For some people it could even be something such as the way they were raised.

It took me awhile growing up to realize for myself cheating is unacceptable, But I was always around it during my upbringing so to me the lines were blurred for a long time between the right and wrong.

After some therapy and some lessons learned the hard way though I figured it out..

People do things for so many reasons that the next person may not understand, in alot of peoples mind sets all that matters and all they see is what makes sense to them.

Unfortunately statistically . If you cheat once, You're very likely to cheat again in your life time. However some people do it once, learn the damage and never do again. I think cheating is a very complex thing. And again remember cheating is more then psychical touch. It's also an emotional thing!!!

Sometimes cheating has NOTHING to do with the persons partner, or the relationship at all. I'll go more in depth later.

Lets go back to the beginning. Cheating WITHOUT love. Some people get into relationships for the sake of the label. The sake of having someone to fall back on no matter what but don't care that they are cheating.

To me, That is cheating without love.

The person does it repeatedly with not much remorse. It's lust, and boredom. Those are the ones you NEED to watch out for. They do it because they know they can. and don't care what happens. Because there is always someone else.

It's pretty simple, Even if its a bitter pill to swallow. If someone is repeating the same "mistakes"

with promise of change but no real changes. They don't care about you. They care about what they are getting from you.

Now, We go on to probably the more painful and complex side of cheating.

Cheating within love.

As I said It can happen.

For some people Cheating, or even the thought of . Is a total deal breaker and end of the rope for the relationship. For others, It's a bump in their road map.

People often think those who stay with cheaters are insane. Maybe sometimes they are. Other times they may stay because theyve been so mentally abused by the individual they dont have the strength to leave. And sometimes , The person just sees the bigger picture with their partner.

Whatever the case, it's solely up to the person unique situation to decide whats best.

Life is; Hard. It's full of stresses, inconveniences . set backs, anger, and loss. We all cope with things differently.. Thats why alcoholics exist, and drug addicts. They were people faced with hard times and thats what got them through. For others fitness, and distraction are what work best. EVERYONE is different.

Remember when I said cheating can sometimes have nothing to do with their partner or relationship? Here's where this applies.

Your partner can love you more then anything in the world and STILL may cheat !

WHY!?!?!?!?!. Because . We cope with stress differently. Say your partner and you are going through a rough patch, and their stressed out with work, and they are having car troubles and everything is just really heavy right now, they come home from a long day and you get into an argument when all they wanted was to confide in you so now they are more heated then before, So.

They take to the internet, or maybe a co worker. They find a quick fix. That isn't so close to home.

Maybe they flirt, or maybe they actually sleep with someone, Or maybe it's just a fantasy they create in their mind to distract themselves from the current problems swirling around the,

What I mean by "not so close to home" is. This person may not know their personal life, their current struggles, and offers no problems to them at this present time. It's a clean simple escape from reality. A comfort.

They don't mean it to cause you harm, and are just coping in maybe the only way that seems helpful at that current time.

It's why alot of married men cheat, They still love their wives but commitment and love can become hard. You need to just breathe somewhere that doesn't feel like a dragon breathing fire down your neck. So what better then a stranger, A girl with no interest in your baggage. Just a fun flirt for the moment

Does that make it hurt less? No. Does that cause less damage? No. But maybe it puts into perspective some form of reasoning .

I've always used my parents as an example for cheating within love.

I know, no matter what they do and have always loved eachother more then life. However going through hell and back with a person you reach times that are sometimes overwhelming. You need to take yourself out of the stress for one second and maybe you pour the part of yourself that youre removing from the situation into someone else.

I'm not defending cheating, I don't think it's healthy. And if you're choosing to shy from managomy its something you should discuss with your partner. I'm just trying to put into perspective. Cheating isn't always without love.

The whole 'The grass is always greener on the otherside" Saying is obviously not true, But we always see it that way. Something we don't have or arent apart of always seems better then our current hardships, and sometimes its hard to remember and see that and we do things we may potentially regret .

There is always consequences to our actions.

The after math of cheating, or being cheated on is the hardest. It's broken trust and insecurities .

You're left with a big huge empty pit of . Did this person ever love me? You see them through different eyes now, and someone you can barely recognize. How could the person i love, hurt me so bad. Lay down and betray me and all that we had .

Humans are not perfect, we are all flawed and learning. And sometimes we forget how to love, we act selfishly without consideration to the those around us.

It takes a long time to heal from the wound of being cheated on within a relationship. But if you love each other its entirely possible to get through it. COMMUNICATION is your biggest asset to help you get back on track. The love you had and feel is not lost, it's not your fault, and you can still thrive

Don't tell yourself you're not good enough. Or that it's your fault.

love is taking those chances on another person. it's up to you to deem whats worth it. Know your limits.

A message to cheaters ;

Someone who wants whats best for you, is whats best for you. And if you've cheated on the one you love you can not be ruthless in the healing process because it seems "annoying" they can't just get over it.

It hits them late at night, right when they can't sleep.

Or eating breakfast and suddenly lose their appetite.

Understand your actions and the damages It's a long road but it's worth it.

Know that there will be doubts and more curiosity on your actions because now there is misplaced trust.

But there is nothing stronger then someone who sticks by you even when there was wrong done.

It's important to know, your lover is capable of comforting you, and will love you and support you more then some stranger ever will. you're replacing frustration with an empty space.

Don't throw away love, for a bad week or a bad day.