#because she will wage war against the world for those she cares about

[likeyua]

@dragonflytehanu thanks for the ask <3

Tell us about your Tav! Name, class and subclass, race, pronouns. Do you have a headcanon for where they're from? Their family? Are they a Dark Urge? Or did you choose an Origin Character? Was it an easy decision?

I already wrote a bit about Akachi here. To add: despite her being a Faithless (she doesn't hide it), people usually notice she always wear a necklace with the holy symbol of Eilistraee. The jewel was passed down to her from her mother Ardul'ylene (it was originally of her grandmother Esmerelle), when she decided to abandon her faith in the Dark Maiden: it has no religious meaning to Akachi. For her, it is simply a treasured memento of her family, a reminder that no matter where she is, her family is always with her.

Another fact about Akachi is that she is named after a Chosen of Myrkul. At first she wasn't happy when she learnt this; but she changed her mind after her parents narrated to her the story of the man, what he did and why (basically, they told her about the events of Neverwinter Nights 2: Mask of the Betrayer). She's proud of her name and a sure way to greatly anger her is to insult her for it.

Kidis is my Dark Urge oc. She's a drow bard, playing her violin whenever she can because it temporarily soothes her growing unease about her violent urges. At first, she thought that her violent impulses & loss of memory were a symptom of ceremorphosis, but when it became clear that they aren't, she simply decide to ignore them, hoping (wrongly) that they will go away on their own. This is her usual way to deal with the issues she face. She also cares a great deal about her reputation, wanting to be unremarkable and forgettable as possible: the less people she has to interact with directly, the better.

3. Has your Character been using their illithid powers?

Akachi: only to rescue Shadowheart on the nautiloid and to read Astarion's mind when he tried to bite her. The latter event caused her to never use the powers for the rest of the game: she felt so awful after doing it because she violated someone else's mind and she loathes when it is done on her (and she will feel worse when she will learn about Astarion's past). She did it instinctively, thinking he was attacking her, but after Astarion left, she vowed to never doing it again and tried to apologize to him for it the next day.

Kidis: she is less careful about using them. She thinks that using them in order to avoid fights and to obtain useful information from enemies is acceptable.

24. Was your illithid tadpole empowered by anything in Act 1? If so, how does your Character feel about that?

No. Absolutely not. Neither Akachi nor Kidis use other tadpoles to empower their own. Why give more power to the source of your problems?

27. Who ended up in your Character's most used party?

Akachi: the main party for act 1 is Astarion/Karlach/Gale. Astarion is always in the party (initially because she doesn't trust him and wants to keep an eye on him, after she comes to enjoy his company), Gale is the one swapped out when I need another companion for their quest (only for gameplay reasons) and Karlach because she and Akachi get on well immediately (this won't last, though, because they will fall out in act 3 over how to deal with a certain npc).

Kidis: Astarion is always in the party as usual. There's also Lae'zel because Akachi didn't recruit her and I want to see her story. The last party member, for now, is Shadowheart.

[haine-kleine]

i thought the ending couldn't be more disappointing and then this japanese tweet proved me wrong

because all of this is true. Ochako and Izuku will never forget Toga and Tenko and half of their epilogue was about this, however messily done. Ochako dedicated herself to creating better conditions for people like Toga, because she saw how badly Toga was suffering and despite failing to save her and give her a brighter future, she committed to building that future on her own, selflessly gifting it to others. Izuku had failed to save Tenko despite wanting to, and this weights on his conscience eight years later, and will continue to haunt him in the form of Shigaraki's ghost watching him, not letting him forget himself in the happy ending of joining his hero classmates and achieving his dream.

it's still messy and unfaithful as fuck, but at least these two endings still show that the consequences were there. the unfair deaths of the villains weren't simply swept under the rug and forgotten after a few sad talks about them.

and the thing these two cases share in common? Ochako and Izuku really didn't owe it to Toga and Shigaraki to save them. they didn't. they were hero kids thrown in the middle of the war these very villains waged on them. they both were younger than their respective villains, they both were hurt by these villains, they had no prior history with them, and having shared a few conversations was enough to make them emphasize with and humanize the villains. nothing that happened to Himiko and Tenko was inflicted on them by Ochako and Izuku, and yet just seeing that, hearing about that was enough to ignite sympathy in their hearts. because, you know, they are heroes. they are there to save people from suffering. and even when those people are the ones actively hurting them and their friends, they are mature enough to set that aside and attempt to save their human lives.

enter the star of the show, the only character in this story who despite having committed truly villainous acts, is allowed to go consequences free without a single care in the world. Enji. the person who had single-handedly fucked Touya up to the point his mental state was too messed up even for AFO to deal with. he had given life to this baby, and he was constantly made aware of how badly his attitude is affecting this child by Rei. and he couldn't be bothered to do anything for him, not even to look at him. the fire on Sekoto was 100% Enji's fault, not only because he couldn't be bothered to come visit his son on his day off when Touya had asked him to, but also because the number two hero on his day off was too slow to come to the forest near his house to save Touya from the fire or from All for One. this makes Touya being kept under AFO's care for the following 3 years Enji's responsibility, as he was the only one who could have saved Touya from AFO. even after Touya wakes up from his coma and immediately runs to his house as fast as he can, it's Enji's behaviour alone that makes him decide against making his presence known to the family for the following 7 years. this excuse of a father can't even mourn the death of a son he explicitly blames himself for in such way that won't make his entire existence feel meaningless to him.

and after Touya reveals himself to Enji personally as Dabi? he proves that he still hasn't changed at all and utterly fails to do anything about the situation while Shouto has to repeatedly remind him of it. not only was he procrastinating, the narrative was coddling him the entire time, with the support of other heroes and sidekicks, who despite being shown the truth about Enji, choose to ignore it. even the family he has been abusing for years, the family who was mourning Touya together, joins their efforts to support Enji.

Touya's only desires were to be seen and to be heard. both went unanswered, as after showing the world the unfiltered truth of the misery his father had caused to him, the world covered their earths and turned away. after showing himself to his family, they keep looking at Enji, not at him.

even at the very end, the end of the family's hell is more about Enji than about any other character. he is the only one allowed to talk about his feelings in depth, while the rest of them are reduced to barebone imitations of their previously established characters used as props for supporting Enji's character resolution (with the exception of Touya, who is physically unable to speak for longer than 5 minutes a day anymore. wow). even Natsuo cutting off Enji is less about the latter being a horrible excuse of a father and more about Enji's great stoicism accepting everything the family throws at him with a heroic face. Rei's character no longer makes sense because exactly a month ago her mental state and the trauma inflicted on her by this very man didn't allow her to face him at all. and now she is suddenly okay with becoming his caretaker? why is she taking her responsibility for Touya and not talking about Enji's responsibility at all? this was a man who had abused her so badly she had a psychotic episode. you don't just shrug off things like this. you don't sit in a psychiatric ward for ten years after that, waiting to be let out and jump on the first chance of making yourself useful for your abuser. you don't set aside the relationships with the children he had hurt and he had made you hurt to devote yourself fully to your damn abuser. someone take this poor woman out of this Stockholm syndrome relationship.

at this point Touya not being allowed to die is the worst offence, because the survival wasn't granted to him to heal. it was given to him for the singular purpose of making Endeavor look slightly less bad. Enji never even talks about failing to save Touya (and neither is Shouto allowed to). if you wanted to save him, then him being stuck immobile and isolated from the world with only months left to live is not 'the time Shouto gave us with him' it's a failure. he's not your damn pet, why is the narrative making him into one?

Touya had wanted to die. Shouto points this out, Touya himself talks about it. Enji was the one who didn't want him to die. he also didn't want to die himself. somehow, his desire is the only one that is fulfilled, while even Shouto's dream of eating soba with his older brother goes ignored.

and afterwards? Enji happily moves on from this with the new family he had found for himself, while Touya's childhood desire of his family looking at him is fulfilled in the most grotesque way possible. and the family's dream of having a home away from Endeavor? not a chance lmao

[ladyloveandjustice]

Summer 2024 Anime Overview: DEAD DEAD DEMONS DEDEDEDE DESTRUCTION

A giant mothership is hovering over Tokyo. The aliens haven’t done anything or even made themselves known yet, but Japan and America are already trying to blow that UFO up, and show off who has the best weapons, causing many civilian casualties along the way. While all this happens, two girls are just casually living their lives. But are they as normal as they appear?

One thing I want to say is if you watch this anime and care about being intensely spoiled, do not watch "episode 0" until you've finished episode 16. It actually slots chronologically between episode 16 and 17, and that's where the episode took place in the manga, so I have no idea why they did that. Fortunately I had someone to warn me about that, so I will be that someone for you.

Dead Dead Demons DeDeDeDe Destruction or De x 8 as I will be calling it, can be really tough show to watch—not because it’s bad, it’s very good, but because of how depressing and visceral it is at times, and how devastatingly accurate it is to the shitshow of our world. This tends to be balanced a bit by the touching friendships (and possibly? More?) of the very likeable cast of teenagers…but you also feel a huge sense of dread about their safety as things ramp up and their stories deepen.

The anime goes hard on criticizing the military industrial complex, Japan’s government, America’s government, xenophobia, treatment of immigrants, rich people, and conspiracy theorists. All things I also hate, so that’s great. What hurts is how you could easily see the events happening—waging war on the aliens despite no provocation, people using an app to to hunt down and slaughter them...

It shows how even some of the protestors of the genocide use their movement to cover their own selfish motivations, meanwhile countries taking the situation as an opportunity to vie for power and dominance, rich government officials lie to their people and abandon them…obviously there's a lot of commentary here on how we dehumanize immigrants and minorities and enable genocides for capitalism and political power.

It's very bleak, and there were a lot of episode that had me just feeling sad, especially comparing it to current events. But there's also this interesting focus on normal people trying to live their lives during this alien "invasion", and the kids who still go through the dramas and upsets of everyday life. And especially the “I’d burn down the world for you” intense emotional relationship between Kadode and Ouran, the two teen girl leads.

Ouran is the main lead, and she’s a chuuni beyond chuuni, acting wacky and cheerful and spouting nonsense-- except if you pay attention, she's saying some pretty valid things—critiques of capitalism, war, government surveillance—but then following it up with something wild like “and that’s why I should rule the world”. You get the sense she’s cloaking an awareness of how shit the world is in humor, and as the show goes on and as her surprisingly intense and weird backstory unfolds, it becomes clear why that is.

The relationship between Ouran and Kadode is the center of everything--their bond IS the show. It's that kind of ride-or-die, I'd-kill-for-you, I'll-be-by-your-side-even-if-the-whole-world-is-against-you, in-every-life-i'd-find-you-and-love-you, soul-bonded, fiery devotion and love. They are the most important person in each other's lives, full stop. It's those kind of relationships that are so transcendent it goes beyond simple definitions of romantic and platonic. In other words, my kind of shit exactly.

But, as far as romance goes, Ouran, at least, is definitely queer and the depths of her determination to keep Kadode safe in a world that wants to destroy her girl that would make Homura Madoka Magica blush. (Kadode is more ambiguous, but she’s definitely soul bonded with Ouran. And honestly should just date Ouran because god she needs to be rescued).

There’s also a gentle empathy for marginalized people underneath all the horror—the girls befriend an alien trying to survive in the guise of a human, and it doesn’t seem like a coincidence that the first person our alien tells absolutely everything to is the gnc/potentially trans person of the group, Makoto (To be specific, they seem to still be figuring out their identity, but they definitely present feminine and specifically came to Tokyo because their small town wouldn’t be okay with how they like to dress). The way Makoto immediately shields their alien friend from others when they make the reveal that they saying “Don’t let them see, it’s not safe” and how it’s followed up by the alien reassuring Makoto that their friends will be okay with it if they take their wig off to swim...it makes the metaphor extremely clear, and it’s always nice when a series can explore marginalized characters both textually and metaphorically.

Through the kids, we get kernels of hope in this story, a reassurance there are kinder people in this world, and a hope that kindness will endure.

As depressing as the story can be, what it has to say is important and it doesn’t hold back in making you see what it’s going for—from the “Cool Japan” logo flashing right before the  Japanese government gives a weapons demonstration that will later kill citizens and destroy innocents...

...to the Trump-alike American President (and let me tell you it’s startling to be watching a show in Japanese and suddenly Donald Trump impression in perfect English) *(had to use the manga here because Crunchyroll didn't close-caption this part :/)

Then there's the American tourists, who were clearly va’d by someone really good at English, potentially a native speaker, and it’s incredibly funny how much of their dialogue has “fuck” in it and seeing the subtitles skip over that. Also much of their dialogue is treating the devastated Japan as a tourist attraction and saying how funny it all is to them. Logan Paul has entered the chat.

De x 8 very clearly hates America and recognizes it as a blood thirsty colonial power, which is correct, but the show is just as hard on it’s own country, saying the Japanese government would happily get back on the colonizing horse if they had an excuse, and many citizwns would mindlessly support them.

A small thing I appreciate is far from the usual anime aesthetic where everyone is blandly cute, the anime gives a ton of people ridiculously cartoony features that make everyone distinct—and being goofy looking is not meant to indicate a character is stupid or ugly—Makoto’s a super sympathetic character with giant cartoon buck teeth and one character that’s even pointed out as pretty has like, a pig snout nose. (It also makes it so the character noted as being drop dead gorgeous...actually is, instead of coming off as just as conventionally attractive as the rest)

Soooo a lot of good stuff going into this story. Let’s talk about some caveats.

There’s a continuing storyline between Kadode and her adult teacher, who takes her to his place to have sex with her. When he does, she ends up ditching him because of her feels for Ouran (gay) and I thought that would be the end of it, but nooope he’s a groomer, they pick up dating again when she’s in college, literally months after the previous encounter. The dude is presented as a scumbag, he cheats on his girlfriend, he seems generally apathetic, his clear discomfort with Kadode calling him “sensei” shows that he knows what he’s doing is wrong …and ultimately the relationship is shown to be unfulfilling, with Kadode directly stating so and acknowledging he’s just advantage. That doesn’t stop it from being uncomfortable though, especially since it’s confirmed he and Kadode have sex eventually (offscreen, thank god) and honestly, I felt it dragged on way too long. The first encounter pretty much demonstrated everything we needed to know about the whole thing in my view.

And of course there’s a ton of potentially triggering content in a story like this—from genocide to suicide to child murder to almost anything you can think of. Also like, one character has a sister complex, but on the milder side for anime. One where it’s conceivably platonic, and it’s not like he goes after her boyfriend Yuri Forger style, so it doesn’t bother me too much. There's also a good dose of fatphobia. And finally moment where a woman reveals she has ADHD (which I've never actually heard anyone say in anime so I actually got a little excited the more fool me) and then is almost immediately shown to be faking it.

The ending…is another big sticking point for me. It feels disconnected from the rest of the series, mainly focusing on a character we barely know and likely don’t care about and spending very little time with the characters we do, presenting an interesting status quo and immediately abandoning it, and while earlier episodes of the series presented "actions have consequences and we gotta live with them" as a major theme, it was suddenly like, actually they don’t!

The ultimate ending, again, hinges on a decision from a character we don’t care about and honestly feels like a deus ex machina. It felt almost like the author really wanted a happier ending but knew that wasn’t in line with the story he’s told so far, so he just tacked it on. Or maybe it was an editorial mandate, who knows. I think the most satisfying way to see watch episode 1-16 as its own pretty satisfying complete story (which works really well), and then treat episodes 0 and 17 as their own separate thing, a potential additional ending but not the definitive one. At least that’s what I did.

Overall, De x 8 is a show with a lot to say and it gives you plenty to chew on. While it is often depressing, it is very rewarding. The unbreakable bond between two messy girls, as well as the moments of ordinary joy and small human/alien journeys are the core of the show, and what makes it shine. I definitely encourage you to give it a watch. It's being really slept on, and it shouldn't be.

[forkingandcountry-if]

I'm happy to present our 5 new ROs, please ask any questions you have about them after reading and do enjoy!

Without further ado meet Lorn, Kent, Arfryn, Dean and Francine (though she just goes by Fran)

From the day his family and house declared for the usurper-king, it was clear that Lorn Greenspan, the youngest of seven brothers each of whom was already able to wield a sword and do and die on behalf of their father, would be sent away as a ward.

Only eight years old, he had to play his part, leaving behind the familiar chill of his home—its cold peaks and harsh landscape fading from sight to give way to the fertile base of the mountain and the pleasant rolling hills of the Vale. He was a pawn in a conflict he could scarcely comprehend

His father had told him plainly that he must be strong—because until the day their house bent the knee, Lorn would remain a ward, and his father had no intention of surrendering.

Forced to adapt, Lorn became useful, talented, indispensable—not out of love for those his family would call captors, but out of necessity. Now, he stands as your closest advisor and a member of your house in all but name—cool, calculating, indifferent. Yet beneath that icy exterior burns a quiet resolve.

Though he never expects his father to yield, he is determined to see his homeland again, even if it means waging war to bring it to heel.

Name: Lorn of Greenspan

Age: 18

Height: 6'0

Appearance: Lorn has a thick head of dark chestnut hair, gently wavy, it is always styled fashionably with pomade and volume. He has a tawny complexion and almost amber, brown eyes that if you didn't know him you'd think were perpetually concerned and caring rather than probing and scanning. Though under his stylish clothes you couldn't tell it, his body is lean and athletic from harsh training. He has a lone small beauty spot on his right cheek.

(gender-locked m) solo-route

Tropes: advisor-turned-lover, secretly-in-love, black cat

—

The unbroken line of Galagar Kings may have fractured at Kirston Wall, but the proud Highland rulers never truly relinquished their claim. To them, Hendrick the Conqueror and his descendants are nothing more than traitors. Yet, they understand that a king's throne is grounded in the right of conquest, and so they bide their time, quietly assembling their forces, tempering their men, and honing their blades.

Preparing for the inevitable clash, they drill relentlessly through lashing rain and violent gales, each generation more convinced of their righteousness and the frailty of their enemies. The realm may slumber in uneasy peace, but in the Highlands, war is always on the horizon.

Kent Galagar, the young Lord of Kirston, was shaped by this belief from childhood. His father, his grandfather, and his great-grandfather—all were kings in their own eyes, their thrones stolen by usurpers. To Kent, acknowledging this truth makes you an ally, a friend. To deny it brands you an enemy, destined to be crushed when the time comes.

For Kent, proud, arrogant, and stubborn as he may seem, the world is divided by a simple truth: those who support the Galagar claim, and those who will fall before it.

Name: Kent Galagar

Age: 18

Height: 5'9

Appearance: Kent possesses a mane of thick, raven-black hair, often left loose or tied back with a leather strap. His skin is scattered with freckling, with a pale complexion. He has piercing blue eyes and a gaze that can shift from arrogant levity to fiery determination in an instant. His powerful frame is unmistakable, with broad shoulders and a chest that strains against the fabric of his tunics. His physique is defined—broad-shouldered and muscular, but not overly so, with a build that suggests both agility and power. His movements carry the confidence of someone who knows his strength and is unafraid to use it.

(gender-locked m) solo-route

Tropes: Intense, enemies to lovers, jerk with a heart of gold, play-boy

—

The nobility are arrogant, cruel, greedy, scheming, and foolish—qualities Arfryn has learned all too well through her peripheral access to them. Her current place among them is no accident but the product of the sweat, blood and tears of her entire family.

Born to a guildman father and a common mother from the east continent, Arfryn witnessed firsthand how the shifting tides of national conflict mirrored the fortunes of her own family. Every struggle either bolstered their wealth or teetered them on the brink of ruin, a fate shared by the yeomanry at large.

Her father, Jasper Caldwell, is the first Premier elected from the Small Parliament, a yeoman elevated by the newly enfranchised class. He has—in no uncertain terms—made it clear that his own position hinges on the peace of the realm.

Arfryn, understanding these dynamics, sees through the superficial grandeur of the nobility. Though she finds them to be the very embodiment of arrogance and folly, she is determined to bend them to her will. For now, she plays the game—offering smiles, be gracious, and dance while they are watching.

Name: Arfryn Caldwell

Age: 20

Height: 5'11

Appearance: Arfryn has a striking presence with her rich, deep brown skin and loose, jet-black braids that cascade down her back ever so slightly curled at the ends. Her eyes are a penetrating dark brown, revealing a sharp intelligence behind a charming, amiable demeanor. She dresses in elegantly simple fabrics that highlight her natural grace—always muted and refined to suit her surroundings but always at the very forefront of courtly fashions. At 5'11 her movements are deliberate, blending seamlessly into the nobility’s world, designed to make her easy to like and hard to hold grudges against.

(gender-locked f) solo-route

Tropes: Steel Magnolia, Dark Feminine

—

In public Dean Champion is everything a Lady-Knight should be, prodigiously skilled with both galder and weapons, valiant, chivalrous and highly popular amongst all who have seen her in tourneys and otherwise.

She like many knights is also spoiled to a fault, her suits of armour gleaming and her squire-boys tasked with keeping them so, as they are expensive and extravagant. Indeed she wears them because all people like a performance and it's her job to give them one.

In private, Dean has dedicated herself entirely to her studies at Pyrenne University, determined to learn all there is about the study and practice of galder and perhaps indeed the deeper secrets that only the great masters know—all the better to become both loved and indispensable to the state.

As the younger sibling of a line with many children, she does not expect to ever inherit and nor does she ever want to, she is entirely content with her career as a tourney knight and the life she's lead in the King's Seat thus far. Indeed Dean has long been utterly convinced that she'd make an awful Lady Paramount, she is convinced utterly that all those like her that revel in the spectacle, the fervor of battle and tourney alike are utterly unsuitable for such positions.

Name: Dean Champion

Age: 19

Height: 5'9

Appearance: Champion has long deep auburn hair, typically braided for both practicalities sake and fashion, with strands often escaping to frame her face. Her skin is fair as if she'd somehow escaped the sun of both her home and the tourney. Her pale green eyes are bright and framed by dark eyelashes. Dean's build is athletic and commanding, showing off the results of rigorous training and combat practice, yet she carries herself with a grace that befits her status as a renowned Lady-Knight. Her entire demeanor projects a sort of graceful confidence, like that you'd expect of a Prince of ages past.

(gender-locked f) solo-route

Tropes: The Lady and Knight, Knight in Sour Armour

—

Fran has long understood that she commands little respect at court—indeed, as a bastard, she finds herself dismissed even within her own family. Yet there is one, a young Lord who is but a child, who legitimized her, who looks up to her, and has earned her unwavering loyalty. Her beloved little brother, her Lord Paramount.

It is for him that she accepted the king's invitation to the King's Seat, to train in the King's Army. She wants to be his eyes, his ears, and his sword.

True loyalty is a rare commodity among the highborn, for what do they owe anyone but themselves and their own appetites?

She is content to endure their scorn and wear the title "Loyal Hound" with pride. After all, what insult lies therein? A good hound is strong, lethal, obedient, loved, loyal, and free to roam so long as it always returns. And return to him she will.

Name: Fran Radwell-Cadderly

Age: 18

Height: 5'7

Appearance: Fran's dirty-blonde hair is cut short, falling just above her shoulders—a length chosen for practicality rather than fashion. Her complexion is fair, lightly sun-kissed from time spent outdoors, with a few sun-spots across her nose and cheeks. Her eyes are a dull blue-green, carrying an intensity that contrasts with her otherwise unassuming features. Her build is lean and wiry, reflecting a life of rigorous training, with a strength that belies her slender frame. Though she dresses simply, her presence is commanding, a blend of quiet confidence and restrained power and it makes her feel much bigger than the 5'7 she stands at.

(gender-locked f) solo-route

Tropes: Guard Dog, Loyal Companion, Golden Retriever

—

The other romance options also have updated bios so we've got a gender balanced cast.

Completely unrelated but Fran, Arfryn and Kent are one soldier, poet, king trio.

Walthe, Veronica and Edmund are another.

Dean, Lorn and the MC are another.

See what I did there, if I was an animator I'd animate that.

[blacklegsanjiii]

I love the warlord!Sanji acesan shovel talk sm <3 also this is really sad but what would have happnd if sanji's execution had succeeded and he really did die? i nkow the warlords prbly wouldve still declared war on the wg and the straw hats would wreak havoc as wle, but do you have any thoughts? how does each parent grieve, how do the crew react upon finding sanji's secret only after his death? can sanji ever be brought back- maybe reiju pulls through again somehow with germa tech that somehow revives sanji- or is he gone forever? these thoughts are haunting me

JESUS OW! THAT HURTS I LOVE IT!

First, his execution if succeeded, would have been taped and possibly broadcasted after the fact, ensuring the fact his death is in fact truthful. The only person up on the platform who looks pleased is Akainu the fucker. Kizaru, usually so unbothered, and Sengoku watched this kid grow up in Warlord meetings but justice comes first and Sanji is a pirate. When Sanji is asked if his parents would be proud Sanji just smiles and in a way similar to Ace and says his parents would be proud, but not the ones the Government wants. After all, he was raised by five Warlords. He's smiling at Akainu, smiling in the face of death and stabbed by the spear/trident things they use in the executions.

The next the newscoo brings reports of Doflamingo and Boa Hancock declaring war on the World Government, the day after Mihawk, a few days later Crocodile and those he rounded up from Baroque Works. Jinbei doesn't but the crew sees how stricken he is. It is immensely heartbreaking to hear Jinbei cry about Sanji, his son, which rocks the crew. They plan a funeral and send out the calls to inform everyone when and where.

Everyone turns up, Law and his crew, Vivi and Karoo, Ace and the White Beard fleet, Perona, and the four warlords who declared war against the government. Law and Vivi are immediately ready for a fight but Jinbei stops them, reminding them they're all here for the same reason. They don't entirely let their guard down and when Zoro asks Perona how she knew Sanji she looks at him like he's dumb.

"We grew up in the warlord meetings together, dummy. He was my baby brother basically." Perona huffs and Mihawk sends a glare at them both.

"Does Moria know you're here?" Crocodile asks her.

"He let me go to Mihawk's for weeks on end to see Sanji, I don't see how his funeral would be different." Perona says solemnly and Crocodile nods. After the "service" if you could call it that everyone parts ways. The crew deals with the fact Sanji was raised differently. Zoro and Nami are angry at the secret, Franky and Robin understand the necessity of such a secret. Brook tries to comfort Jinbei but no parent should have to bury their child. Luffy is angry that Sanji is dead, furious, he doesn't care who Sanji's parents are, doesn't matter. Usopp and Chopper are crying, they've always been pretty free with their emotions so more secrets are just more tears for them.

As for the warlords grieving? Crocodile has always been a workaholic so he's definitely rebuilding his empire while waging war. Boa retakes Amazon Lily and builds a shrine to Sanji that's private, for her and Sanji's fathers. She sits by it every time she gets home and just sobs and lets her anger fester until she goes out again. Doflamingo lets his fury guide him, he's never really had to mourn before. He doesn't understand it and so he just kills whoever is in his way to get to whoever sanctioned the killing of his child. Similarly Mihawk has never really had to mourn before, but he understands the process in theory. He probably calls Shanks up at one point to ask when he stopped crying about Roger and Shanks admits he still cries about it, not as often, maybe a couple of times a year but in the beginning it was a lot and often.

Below is if Sanji is saved, miraculously.

IF SANJI is brought back by Reiju, or in my beautiful world of all the siblings defying Judge because the brothers are learning emotions, 0124 bring Sanji back I can't imagine them bringing Sanji to the Sunny is a safe option. Nor is Amazon Lily or Kuriagana and Doffy doesn't even have a ship which leads to four genetically modified siblings dropping off the least modified sibling in front of Daz, Croc, and a few others as they rush to explain they saved Sanji and revived him and they can't see their brother's crew because of the pact Judge has with Luffy. Sanji is also probably a mess because he died and now he's not dead and is having several issues with that and being away from crew.

Croc's first thought is to get his dumbass kid re-acclimated to being alive first and reuniting him with his crew second. The first does involve some of the best doctors Croc knows running tests on his kid to make sure he's alright because he knows Sanji has been revived before when he was a kid in Germa, also they used Germa tech to do it which makes it worse. But once Sanji is relatively calmed down and used to being alive again Crocodile calls the parents and lets them know A. Sanji is alive thanks to Germa tech and his siblings and B. Is taking him to his crew.

His crew is ecstatic to see him and there's happy tears all over but also he's alive. Reiju explains everything and Sanji is tucked away in a pile of Strawhat Pirates.

[powdermelonkeg]

This has been bugging me for a while now. Because of the racist elements surrounding Ganondorf and the Gerudo as a whole, is it morally wrong to write him as the villain in fanfics (even though he's a canon villain)?

Hoo boy. What a question.

I personally don't think so (other people's answers may vary, please DO NOT take me as the one final answer on this topic), AS LONG AS you're mindful of a few things.

Portraying the Gerudo as a whole as bad isn't a route you ever want to go. OoT's Gerudo are an example of this; a whole clan of people, and they're all thieves? No. BotW handled this part well by making them a distinct, fun-to-be-around people (they have a whole list of other issues, but they're not villains) that you could befriend and work alongside.

Giving Ganondorf valid reasons to be angry with the royalty and want power leans into a different problem you need to handle delicately, in that he/his people are oppressed. Them being oppressed isn't a problem on its own, but it's an oversaturated cliche that belittles POC's agency in the narrative and likes to glorify their suffering; why do so many stories about POC have to be about their struggles under a terrible regime?

You have more leeway with an established Ganondorf than one you make yourself. We know how Ocarina of Time, Wind Waker, and Twilight Princess's Ganondorfs act, and a fanfic that keeps them in character is working with the pieces you've been given. With those, it comes down to asking why Nintendo made their main villain look SWANA (Southwest Asian/North African) yet AGAIN. With an OC Gan, you have to be careful to make him the villain without making him the face of his people or boiling it down to "white people save the world from angry brown man." And that's very tricky to do properly.

Don't make Ganondorf's existence a thing that his people have to atone for. TotK did this, at least in the English translation (and possibly as a byproduct of traditional Japanese ideals of honor). Riju's ancestor said her reason for granting her a secret stone is because she believes it's the Gerudo's fault for making Gan—that is a BIG no. He's his own person, he should be responsible for his own actions.

Especially with an OC, there are a few ways to mitigate the damage Ganondorf does as a character creatively:

Have the real Ganondorf be a good man, but the power-hungry dictator be a curse that took over him and/or replaced him. You can really lean into the horror with this one as everyone slowly realizes their king isn't the man standing in front of them; where's Ganondorf, and how much have they been telling this doppelganger?

Have Ganondorf's ascent to power be a hard-fought one, and follow his descent into obsession more closely. In TotK, Rauru says Gan's a "hero to his people," rather than only acknowledge that since he's the one man born every 100 years it means he's got a right to rule, as it was in OoT. Could he have waged a civil war in Gerudo, and won it? Is he a hero to his supporters only?

Make the struggle one of a point of view. Ganondorf believes he has a right to rule; why? Is it something he should have gotten by tradition, but was shunned because someone better than him came along? Does the Hyrulean side of things look more like a conspiracy to take something of his (hello, Triforce of Power) if you see things from his eyes? Has he seen the world fall, read the history books, and wants to stop the cycle before it continues, but can only do so by force? You can go with a self-fulfilling prophecy on this angle.

Make Link or Zel not white, possibly even of Gerudo heritage. This isn't a perfect solution, but it's the most straightforward and has lots of worldbuilding potential—the problem with a lot of things that make something racist isn't that they exist, it's that they're the ONLY thing that exists. If you've got five white characters in a movie up against a black villain, that's racist; it's visually reducing who's good and who's bad to the color of their skin. If you've got a mixed cast of white and black people on the heroes' side, and a black villain, you've repaired that significantly, because you can no longer glance at the cast and point out who the villain is by anything but their costume design. In LoZ specifically, we've got some new opportunities; Sonia isn't white, so not all of her descendants should be. Link could hail from Lurelin Village. Zelda could be the result of one of her parents being a Gerudo; people ship BotW Zel's mom with Urbosa anyways, so it's not like no one will be receptive to that.

Alternatively, make another Gerudo man that has to go head to head with Ganondorf alongside Link and Zel. One Gerudo male is born every 100 years; logically, there should have been one during the Calamity, and another one during the Upheaval. Or you could have Gan be one of a set of twins. Again, not a perfect solution, but it helps to mitigate stereotypes by having more characters in play. Compare BotW/TotK's Gerudo to OoT/MM's Gerudo, it's a VAST improvement in terms of how the narrative describes them as a whole.

Design-wise, there's a couple things you should not do:

Don't make Gan green as a stand-in for being brown. He's still POC-coded, you just upped the other-ing factor. "Haha, see this bad guy? Isn't he STRANGE looking?" That's the kind of vibe making him green portrays.

Don't make him or his supporters darker than the other Gerudo. If you want skin tone variation like BotW has, have a mix between both sides of the conflict. And ESPECIALLY don't make him literally black in skin tone (staring at Twilight Princess Gan).

Don't make his outfit overtly sexy. That's not to say he can't be attractive, but exposing his skin to make him shirtless and hot isn't fixing his monstrous-ness, it's objectifying the people he represents. Remember the problems with the vai outfit? Exactly like that, just on a guy. Also, it's terribly impractical for the desert; Wind Waker Gan had much more sensible clothes than TotK.

All in all, a lot of "fixing Ganondorf" should fall to Nintendo to repair in future entries, where their character design team needs to take a good long look at what they're putting out there before they make another villain. Your job, if you're fanfic-ing him, isn't to make him a perfect character or vindicate him; it's to handle what you WERE given with care and add to it in a better direction than the designers took it. And because it's fanfic, you have so many different ways you can do that.

And if this is too intimidating a prospect to tackle, there's Vaati, Malladus, Bellum, Majora, Ghirahim, even the Horned Statue in BotW/TotK you could break free and run away with.

Go wild.

[bestworstcase]

There’s one line in particular in the Lost Fable that I would love to get your perspective on.

“Why spend our lives trying to redeem these Humans when we can replace them with what they could never be?”

I am guessing this is one of those lines that (assuming your theory is correct) comes out under “Did not think that through” from Salem’s perspective.

oh yes that line

so

two hundred million years ago the god of light decided that salem deserved to be punished with eternal suffering because she grieved in a way he perceived as arrogant and selfish. after a few decades* trying fruitlessly to kill herself she came to the not unreasonable conclusion that the monstrous gods who did this to her could and indeed should be resisted, whereafter she devoted considerable time and effort to fomenting a rebellion against them with the specific intention of usurping them

(*long enough for a whole new city to be established and grow to considerable size)

they retaliated by literally vaporizing every single person on the planet including her, and blaming it on her for not ~learning her lesson~ once she reconstituted. then fucked off and broke the moon on their way out, and certain key details in ‘the two brothers’ lead me to believe that the resultant bombardment on remnant did indeed have the realistic consequence of causing an apocalyptic mass extinction event do you ever think about the way salem screams when she’s set on fire i think about this every day holy fuck anyway

obviously none of this improves her opinion of the gods whatsoever

two hundred million years and a whole industrial revolution later* ozma comes back and they fall in love again and he expresses worry about the state of the world and how divided people are, at which point salem is like, basically, “the gods wrecked everything and left, of course the world has gone to hell and people are having hard times, maybe they just need some help?” and then goes STRAIGHT to enthusing that they could surpass the old gods. “create the paradise the old gods could not.”

(*when ozma reincarnates his pants have zippers. ZIPPERS i don’t care that salem’s aesthetic tastes are a few millennia out of date, by the time ozma returned mass production and factories were a thing)

this woman has spent upwards of two hundred million years truly believing, heart and soul, that people have the capacity to transcend the failures and limitations of their creators. she watched the gods obliterate humanity with a snap of their fingers and then she watched humanity claw itself back from the grave to spread across the world again, to survive and thrive even without the god-given magical powers ancient humans relied upon. can u imagine the effect that would have on somebody? to lead a desperate rebellion against the gods, and fail, and witness the execution of her whole world, and then see that world restore itself in the absence of those gods, in defiance of their design?

and then—after years of marriage, after four children, after waging war to support her lover’s ambitions—he blindsided her with “this isn’t what he asked of me,” and dropped the truth in her lap

that the gods who sentenced her to eternal torture and slaughtered the entire planet like it meant nothing to them have now appointed her lover to “redeem” humankind (for her sins! for her rebellion! the blade hangs over humanity’s neck because the gods still have not relinquished their grudge against her! do you ever think about how salem has spent her whole life knowing that her existence is someone else’s justification for murdering people! this is another thing i think about constantly it haunts me she grew up knowing that simply speaking to her was a crime punishable by death,) or else the gods will return to slaughter everyone, except her, AGAIN.

is it any wonder she spits the word redemption with utter disgust. is it any surprise that she flatly refuses to even consider the notion of redeeming humans before the gods she despises and holds as monsters inferior to their own creations. is it any wonder that she reiterated her own staunch conviction that humans can and should and must replace the gods.

as a point of interest this is not the only ambiguous “them” in lost fable—when the god of darkness says “you may bask in the powers of creation, but you do not own them,” he exchanges a glance with salem and then gestures towards her and ozma, clarifying his meaning as “you do not own humans”—and meanwhile the camera cuts from salem to ozma for the second clause such that we have no way of knowing whether she made a similarly clarifying gesture.

and like

yes, it’s grammatically sloppy and vague for “them” to mean “the gods.” but a) she was upset and people often misspeak when they’re upset, and b) what’s more likely: that the woman who has spent hundreds of millions of years hating the gods and wanting to overthrow them spoke a little messily while reiterating that ambition in the heat of the moment after learning those gods were planning a second genocide, or the unexpected sight of ONE of her four daughters doing a magic trick instantly triggered some latent hitherto unknown desire to eradicate humanity herself and breed magical humans, in the woman whose relationship with her own magic is clearly fraught at best, given how hard she hammers the “power comes with crippling weaknesses, be careful, be careful” point with cinder and preferentially uses dust or grimm or simple persuasion, only turning to magic as a last resort?

frankly i don’t know why anyone believes with any seriousness that the character who opens the story waxing poetic about the ingenuity and resourcefulness and bravery and passion and strength of humankind, who openly mocks ozma for the self-sabotage in his abysmal failure to inspire hope bc he fears the truth too much to share it and deceives and manipulates even his innermost circle instead, and whose main point of contention with her most valuable lieutenant is her frustration with that lieutenant’s fixation on magical power and consequent recklessness and impatience, is obsessed with magical power as the defining characteristic of humanity and disdains modern humans as inferior imitations of the real thing. like it genuinely baffles me that so many people read lost fable this way. how. HOW, when her hatred of the gods and genuine, absolute belief in human potential is bleeding from every scene.

[callofchimera]

Hello~

May you lore dump about your ocs? 🥺 I checked out the posts about them and they look to be so cool and interesting! Especially since they're inspired by historical fiction and eldritch horror (two things I totally love!) How did you come up with your ocs? -🪽

Yes! Thank you so much for the ask! I love talking about my OCs!

I suppose I should start with the world building. My story takes place in a world where at the closure of WW2, instead of the nuclear bomb being the break out technological advancement, it was the discovery of eldritch outer realms. This brings the war to a quick close as world powers quickly harness the eldritch energy to make new weapons. My story takes place in the aftermath of this. Some societies knew about the outer realms for years but this was the first time humans themselves had access to such power.

The groups that knew about the outer realms were four sets of immortals, that had found their starts on earth via different methods throughout history. Some come from the stars, some from other dimensions and some split off from humans themselves. There are the werewolves, dragons, unicorns and vampires. They all disagree about how humans should be ‘shepherded’ and led into the new eldritch age, and wage war against one another because of it.

Some important OCs of mine are shown below. I will talk a little about them here, in order:

- Pyran: A member of the elusive Unicorn Nomads. He is unfathomably old, is generally kind but can also be arrogant. Believing he knows what is best for everyone due to his status as an old unicorn. He is the partner of Ziggy.

- Ziggy: A human man around 30. His family was involved in the discovery of the eldritch realms years ago and made a fortune from it, but he is a disappointment to them. He isn’t particularly hard working and found it hard to fit in before meeting Pyran and Elsbeth and embarking on a journey with them.

- Scarlett: A human woman who grew up obsessed with the stories of immortals and the discovery of the eldritch realms. She stumbles across Lutz, a werewolf, during her research and marries him.

- Lutz: A blind werewolf warrior from a small village in the middle of nowhere, increases hard to find for those who have not been told where it is. He uses his werewolf abilities to defend his people even though he is blind. He meets Scarlett when she is down on her luck and quickly falls in love with her. Eventually starting a family. Uses a halberd.

- Martin: A vampire who advocates for the spread of eldritch energy and weapons, he is a cruel man, taking pleasure in human suffering. His greatest enemy is Elsbeth as her sun/fire mastery is a threat to an undead like him.

- Joy: A cheerful dragon military leader from the hidden dragon isles, a place entirely inhabited by dragon women. Despite their past, the dragons have not gone to war in a long time and this shows in Joy’s soft, happy demeanour. People are put off by how kind and nice she is for a commander. Elsbeth used to occupy her position in centuries past where dragons were more ‘enthusiastic’ about war and conquest.

- Elsbeth: Possibly the most promising dragon warrior ever to have lived. She is centuries old and a master of flight and fire. She can have a bad temper and tends to hurt people on purpose to hide how much she cares deep down. She was exiled from the dragon isles long ago for bringing disgrace to dragon-kind. She has a rivalry with Joy at first but they quickly learn to love one another. Ziggy is her best friend but she does not approve of Pyran due to his arrogance and status as a unicorn as dragons have historically been at odds with them.

- Nimue: Essentially the antithesis to Elsbeth. A very old water dragon who is also an excellent warrior. They can’t live with one another and they can’t live without one another. She is cheerful and confident and can be a little promiscuous.

- Silas and Cassia: Siblings from the oldest and most respected family in the dragon isles. Cassia is the oldest of many immortal sisters and Silas is her new younger brother. Men do not inherit dragon powers or immortality, but sometimes present with the odd horn or two. Cassia babies him, knowing she will not get much time with him compared to her sisters.

And that’s the basics!! My blog is named after this story, ‘Call of Chimera’. It’s far from done and my dream is to one day make a webcomic about it. Generally the story has a very dieselpunk/fantasy vibe and is an amalgam of inspiration from many of the books, games, shows and legends I love.

Thanks so much for the ask, it has really encouraged me to post more about my characters/original art. If anyone ever wants me to elaborate on any of this stuff, just ask, honestly I am more than happy to ramble more!

[balanceoflightanddark]

Unpopular opinion.

Post-redeemed Azula would agree with Aang that Ozai deserves to live.

Azula's always loved her father and I think, even if she turns against him, a part of her always will and she even learns to forgive him. She'll think that since she, Zuko and Iroh got saved, and Zuko was given the daunting task the save their entire country, it's only fitting that Ozai be saved too.

With her intelligent mind, she may even help Aang actually find a third solution. But I also think Azula would still prepare for the possibility of Ozai being killed out of self-defense.

Agreed. And I think that Aang sparing Ozai would help Azula's development more than you would believe.

Azula is basically a big stand-in for the indoctrination of the Fire Nation. Being raised to believe in the lies and propaganda that supported the war effort ever since Sozin started the Genocide of the Air Nomads. He said it was because they were amassing an army to oppose him, but Aang knows for a fact that there was no army.

What I'm trying to get at here is that it's lies and stories like this that helps paint the Fire Nation's goal as just and noble. To uplift the world and to defeat the savage other nations beating down their door. And the best way to do that is portraying them in the worst light possible. I already talked Azula's rather black-and-white view of the world in a post here, but the crux of it is that when you have a society built on warmongering and waging war, it'll be natural to assume that the enemy will stoop to the lowest in order to destroy you.

However, Aang sparing Ozai demolishes that worldview. He spared his enemy, something that was believed incapable from the biggest enemy of the Fire Nation. And if Azula sees that Aang isn't some monster that needs to be destroyed, that he is capable of compassion even to his worst enemies, then maybe that will challenge some of her beliefs in what she was raised with.

And Ozai DID instill a lot of those beliefs into her, like it or not. Helped shape her into what she was during the war. Which then we get around to something a bit more complicated: Azula's views on Ozai post redemption. I don't think she'll ever get past loving him. Even if it was abusive, it was the only "stable" relationship Azula was familiar with. And even if it was for his own gain, he still encouraged Azula to pursue her firebending and taught her stuff like the value of duty or self-control.

It doesn't mean Ozai ISN'T a shitty parent. No, he was. But it'll be difficult for Azula to completely sever ties with him since he instilled a lot of what she was, or maybe even invertedly fostered some of the positive qualities she could have if she's redeemed. It's an interesting balancing act between admiring somebody for their qualities and how they shaped you, and the brutal reality of their shitty behavior and how awful they are. I actually encourage watching this review of the BraveStarr episode "Fallen Idol" to get a good idea of what I'm talking about since it actually does a pretty stellar job of examining this sort of relationship.

Yes, it's an 80s toyetic cartoon. No I don't care cause the writing and messages are really good and has a cybernetic horse shooting a laser blunderbuss and a snarkyass Mole/Ewok hybrid. Sue me.

Besides, I think it's a powerful message to finally end the cycle of violence for Azula by just stopping the killing. How's she not the ruthless weapon of war anymore, and being a good transition for her character into a time of peace.

[mousegard]

i feel like so many of edelgard's positive qualities don't get enough attention in the fandom. like yes she's gay and beautiful and you can kill the pope together, which is wonderful, but it wouldn't be as wonderful without...

her humanism and her staunch faith in her ideals, namely that humans deserve better than magic dragon blood based feudalism— being so unwavering in those ideals that even at her worst and most desperate, she doesn't waver. she witnessed firsthand all of the worst humanity had to offer, and instead of closing herself off and becoming a misanthropist or a bitter pessimist, she committed herself to revolutionary humanism at an expected immense personal cost

she strives to be the best leader she can be and brings out the best in all the people around her, even if it takes her a little while to figure out what "the best" looks like in someone like linhardt. even in non-cf routes the absolute loyalty she has endeared herself to among her men is highlighted on multiple occasions

she's ruthless, but merciful. she treats even her worst enemies as mercifully as she can and exhibits a steadfast refusal to prioritize revenge over restorative justice. her wide perspective and compassion for all the world acts as the foundation for all of her values. and it's just there beneath the surface and the ice-hearted facade for those who care enough to look

she's soberly self-aware and at every step of her journey understands the full consequences of her actions to the best of her capabilities, and does everything she can to mitigate those consequences and wage as clean a war as she possibly can given her circumstances and constraints (raising the thorny issue of how "clean" a war can really be and how much culpability she bears in routes where she has less leverage over the agarthans)

one of edelgard's greatest flaws is that she can be quick to assume she knows what's best for everyone, and i love how that flaw is explored and overcome in canon vis a vis the support chains she has with linhardt and caspar, for example, where they push back against that tendency and she gains a better sense of what they really need as opposed to what she thinks they ought to need. i think it's that growth that ultimately separates her from people like rhea, seteth, and dimitri, and also that demonstrates that she among all the characters in three houses has the greatest aptitude for real and effective leadership (claude is a close second, and i love that they're both very good and effective leaders for different reasons). and, if i can get on my crack crossover bullshit for a sec, that's one axis where i think her personality and toriel's intersect, so it's been fun writing my undertale crossover and having them butt heads over being actually too like each other)

her most tragic flaw, of course, is that she thinks she's become something nobody could love or trust, and thus is resigned to dying alone as the villain in everybody's story. but the better angels of her nature are always fighting against that flaw. she honestly cannot fucking help but reach out to people, make connections, and give them helping hands, even if she lives with the constant sword of damocles looming over her head that it will all come crashing down and she'll be alone again. but she can't help herself. because that is who she is. nothing about her at heart is solitary. and that's one of the magical things about cf! validating her for reaching out in spite of everything! showing that the bonds she formed with her classmates and teachers weren't all for naught! showing that she doesn't have to live a solitary life as a tyrant and cement a place for herself on the wrong side of history! she is going to live and love and thrive and she will not do it alone. it's so beautiful. she's so beautiful

it's not that everything she does is good or right, or that she doesn't have blood on her hands. if that moral complexity wasn't there and she wasn't fully conscious of the oceans of blood she wades through in pursuit of a better world she would be such a less interesting and thought-provoking character. it's not that she's perfect... it's just that there is literally nothing i would change about her*

if you delve deeply into 3h's use of religion and religious symbolism in its story, there's a very interesting subtextual narrative that paints edelgard as a revolutionary who is not just a staunch humanist but also inadvertently doing the work of the goddess, even though she lost her faith long ago, and is willing to die and go down in history as a devil if it means having the slimmest chance of rescuing humanity from the tyranny of a false prophet

i honestly think she's one of the greatest revolutionary humanist icons i've ever seen in a video game. maybe any piece of mainstream media outside of a terry pratchett book. she's mary wollstonecraft with a giant fuckoff axe. she's napoleon meets emperor meiji. she's not the messiah, she's a very naughty girl. she's a female cringe ass lobster. she's as gay as the day is long. she's edelgard von hresvelg and i've written two million words about her and could easily write two million more

* except her species, of course

[yes-these-obsessions-are-healthy]

Source: user signupstuff, under this video

—-

If he gave up Zaun he could be with Jinx, and potentially steer her toward fully accepting her identity as ‘Jinx’, but he would be walking around with a huge target on his back as a traitor, and at his age he is not as able as Jinx is. If he wanted both of them to be safe, they would have to leave Zaun and Piltover altogether in self-exile, which I’m certain would be a form of death and defeat for Silco.

If he remained while rebuffing the deal, he would be a constant target for assassination by both Piltover and Sevika. Sevika and the chembarons would throw Silco out of power and try to wage war with him over control of Zaun to get the resistance back on track, which would mean a power struggle that Silco knows he could never win. He has nothing to offer people, because he threw away the very thing that had made him amass such a following: his dream.

And if he were to be killed in this gang war by Sevika or a chembaron, he would be leaving Jinx alone in the world. He’d been doing his utmost to sever that emotional connection to Vi while acting as her guardian, and he was 90% of the way there by Act 2. His death would leave Jinx worse off in death; she could very well become blinded by grief and burn the whole city to the ground since in her mind it would be “Zaun that took him away from her”. Part 2 and 3 demonstrated that while Jinx doesn’t like Piltover or Enforcers, she doesn’t care very much for Silco’s plans of an independent Zaun, either. It’s not something she’s particularly interested in. She’s very much about ‘doing whatever, whenever since the world doesn’t care about her existence, so why should she play by society’s rules?’ Without Silco to ground her and pointing her toward a goal, she’d be doing whatever, whenever, to whomever with little distinction between Zaun and Piltover.

If he sold out Jinx, he would get what he always dreamed of, what he was nearly murdered over and killed his brother in turn for, but in doing so he would be giving up on the one enduring principle he held, which was loyalty to those he holds close. While he’s manipulative, ruthless, pragmatic, business-and-profit-minded, he wouldn’t have been able to swallow down his conscience of creating an independent city on the back of a betrayal. It went against the sort of Zaun he wanted to create: A den of thieves and unscrupulous businessmen, but a haven that would close ranks to protect each other from outsiders. It would kill a part of him. Not to mention he would lose someone he holds very close. A daughter, a protege, a tool, whatever you think he sees Jinx as..

Jinx’s decision to aim Fishbones at Piltover was as much fulfilling a personal vendetta as it was honoring Silco’s memory by enacting his original violent plan.

Zaun in all of its terrible, Gotham-like glory only exists because of Piltover, and deep down, that is something I think Jinx wholeheartedly believes, even if she barely speaks two words about politics throughout the entire show. Everything leading up to Jinx being Jinx, she can trace back to Piltover allowing Zaun to crumble into a slum, for the exploitation and disparity being so great that it demanded a resistance that eventually tore two brothers apart, and whose violent oppression led to the deaths of her parents. Piltover not only orphaned her, but led to the creation of the vengeful man who would go on to kill her adopted father + family (even if Powder was the one who accidentally killed them, Silco most certainly was planning on doing it anyway), ensnared her long-lost elder sister with an Enforcer, and THEN threatened to take her second adopted father away from her by offering him a trade: her life for his dream. Piltover stole everything from her and kept on taking, even demanding that Silco choose between preserving his life or hers. A cruel ultimatum presented by Piltover to once again fuck her over in some way.

Jinx being the one who killed Silco was ironic for the obvious reasons, but because she was the one to kill him instead of Sevika a chembaron, Vi, or even Ekko, Zaun is (relatively) safe from her potentially going all scorch-earth on the place out of grief. She would not associate Zaun with loss or theft of her happiness, and Silco’s dream for a prosperous Zaun is safe, because even though the Council was voting for Zaun to be allotted independence, none of that would matter if the canyon ended up as burning metal.

Jinx’s decision to aim Fishbones at the Piltover council was as much fulfilling a personal vendetta as it was honoring Silco’s original plan. Silco’s original strategy wasn’t to win a decisive victory over Piltover, but to make Piltover hurt, to inflict vindictive, vengeful pain so it would respect and fear Zaun as an entity that wasn’t going to be treated as something to be tormented and exploited without repaying with injury. And in aiming Fishbones at Piltover, Jinx was that sentiment embodied at its absolute zenith. In a way, I think Silco initially groomed (not that way) her to internalize and cultivate those feelings because he saw in her a wounded creature that had the potential to become something dangerous and deadly, fueled by the indignity and resentment of wrongful hurt (‘the monster inside all of us’), but she had not yet harnessed not channeled those feelings to their full capacity until Episode 9. Powder was always in the way, or else her insecure attachment that made her doubt her own wantedness. The Shimmer helped to unlock that primal, violent part of her, but it also exacerbated her mental illness and unpredictability.

This is all conjecture, of course, but Jinx doesn’t strike me as someone who wouldn’t say ‘Burn it all’ to the people who took Silco from her, even if she was grappling with a phobic fear of abandonment pitted against the instinct to cut him out of her heart to avoid the pain that his potential betrayal/abandonment would cause her.

[swevene]

sometimes i think about just how lonely cyneric has to be in his castle. all his servants transformed into statues. i can imagine at times those he might have been close too he sometimes might even talk to them. just so he won't go crazy. but their appearance are just as monstrous as his own. frozen. never to say a word. they probably aren't even aware their prince is talking to them. day in and day out no one but him and his thoughts and the cursed castle.

he for sure frequents his rose garden the only thing that can give him any kind of joy. they are stuck in full bloom rather it's snowing or summer time. at least there he knows he personally cared for these roses. and while not needed still looks to see if they have weeds growing or anything that is out of place that isn't perfection.

He also has mixed feelings when people do come to the castle. On the one hand it's an actual person he might actually get to socialize that he so desperately needs but doesn't acknowledge he does. On the other he's a monster, a beast he's terrifying to most. Plus the rumors that have spread that there is a beast here that killed their prince. Some want to see this beast, kill it even. Others scoff there's no beast they just said that to scare people off and go seeking out the royal treasure. The castle is still well hidden and it's location not well known by others. It was meant for protection and safety for the royal family. Which is why Cyneric was there at all his mother was waging war against those that would try to take their kingdom. She put him there for his own safety since he was just a baby when this started.

Then there is the hopelessness of it all. The fairy that was his mentor and wanted him to marry him and cursed him for it. In the originally tale which is what I got by he says this to Beauty after the curse is broken:

"A wicked fairy had condemned me to remain under that shape till a beautiful virgin should consent to marry me: the fairy likewise enjoined me to conceal my understanding; there was only you in the world generous enough to be won by the goodness of my temper; and in offering you my crown, I can't discharge the obligations I have to you."

Like marriage. A beautiful woman has to agree to marry him. Him who now looks like a beast. He truly feels that is completely hopeless.

Also also he would never reveal he was actually a prince. Because who would believe that? And if they knew who's to say that wouldn't mess with the curse? That and he is so ashamed of how he appears he would never let anyone call him a prince or by his real name. Because his real name could be revealing he is the prince. Though the prince is assumed dead by everyone so maybe they wouldn't bat an eye but it's still a thing to think about. He also doesn't know that people thinks he's dead. It's never crossed his mind he's had.... curse things to think about instead.

[pluralsword]

Femslash February 2023: Resolving Hope

Summary:

Unicron and Functionists vanquished and Cybertronian empire dead, Anode, Lug, Arcee, and Aileron are able to get in contact and of course want to meet… but it's not so easy, at least for Arcee, facing death's door and old pains all over again, knowing that Anode and Lug are facing what has exhausted her. When the four meet, they have some things to talk about and celebrate…

This less than 2000 words story is a tie-in to Addendum, and technically happens after most of the chapters are over, but we wanted to release this now as it's own thing because of wanting to write something hopeful and with closure, and because the next third of Addendum that we're going to write will be difficult for us emotionally, and we want to provide a story on it's own that has the reunion we wish canon had had time for. You can read it here or on Ao3! Text of story below if you want to read it on tumblr:

Metroplex, Earth. December 2018 CE

“I’m scared,” I held Aileron’s hand tightly while staring at Metroplex’s round space bridge ring, every ton of my frame trembling thinking about the graveyard turned home to joyful life on the other side of the shimmering bright blue space bridge portal within the ring. “A world transformed for the better, like here… but with corpses from my time or before…” memories of the photos acquired in recent years ran through my mind, of the fields of dozens of dead Titans from my youth or before that had left me feeling empty and cold to see more confirmed deaths of people I knew. 

Corpses now gone after Infinitus attempted to raise them to wipe out everyone on Cybertron who did not fit his Functionism, desecrator, at least the forces of the Council of Worlds and dear pal Windblade laid them all to rest by fire before Unicron consumed them with my old ‘home’.. . and new life was ignited by the Vector Sigma of- of a monument of defeated genocide still turbulent to rise again-  the green-gray space bridge room and the bridge technician bots around us were out of focus to my sight. Even though we’ve talked over comms when it was all over, knowing that two of the bots I thought corpses are alive and over there…

“Tell me about what you’re feeling, darling,” Aileron stepped in front of me, taking hold of my other hand, her broad rounded chest pressed up on me, big air breathing rocket engine shoulders and back wings still, optics holding my gaze.

“I… I don’t understand how Anode and Lug set up a home on Luna 1… how they could be in orbit of a Cybertron bloated from stolen resources that is still coming to terms with the end of the Functionist regime… the risk to their lives along with those kids they’re raising…” they’re on a moon orbiting Cybertron again, and I’m not there with them to stop them from getting killed because I’d rather be here- “I want to be done with Cybertron for now… I don’t think I’m ready to go over there.” I felt my rage and grief boil in my frame, viscerally remembering the touch and trust of the communities with overlaps of fellow trans folks, gals, and people who cared for us who I had lost to or found traumatized survivors from hegemonic violence of the Cybertronian Civil War, the rise of Functionism, and the Great War after or to organic mechanophobia, and knowing the pains of our splinter universe counterpart survivors who resisted Functionist rule on New Cybertron. 

Crasher won’t speak to me because of what she’s done, Vibes and Shatter are missing, Minerva, Rampage, Phreaker, and Trans-Mutate break down frequently when we visit or they’re alone, Lug’s died once already, and Codexa… my back stacks and hands ached to draw my swords, give up teaching and peacebuilding advisory, to step through the space bridge and wage a personal war against any neo-Functionist in the star system beyond. No- I have to let other people do this fight. My optics stayed on Aileron’s through all of this pressure in me, her yellow optics widening and face falling with sadness.

“You’re really upset, I’ve never seen you like this… but you’ve told me…” Aileron smooched the center of my chest lightly before looking back up at me. “All the hurt over what Cybertron’s done to you, would have done to me and did do to my counterpart from the splinter universe- I know it’s hard to face, I can understand wanting to take that rage out, that it feels like it’s displacing the peace you’ve found in yourself.” she embraced me, smiling so softly and sweetly with brightness in her visage as I murmured at her hands touching the bottom of my back stacks. “I know the love and wisdom in you is very strong, and also frustrated. We don’t have to cross- why don’t you comm them through the bridge and ask them to step through-”

Past Aileron’s dome shaped head, I saw a long beige ankle and brown foot and a shorter gray and red counterpart step through the blue swirl of the active space bridge, the rest of the two bot’s frames coming all the way through-

“Aileron, turn around and follow me-” I beamed as droplets streamed down my cheeks, taking in the sight of lanky and winged green and gray Anode and stout and blocky Lug holding hands, the two’s blue optics quickly looking at Aileron facing them and me in turn, wide grins on their faces-

I stepped around Aileron swiftly, running into the amorously remembered pair with tearful laughter flowing from me, and picked up one in each arm in a tight hug, feeling their arms around me, and smooched Anode and Lug’s cheeks in turn before setting them down, my knees bending a little, leaning on them. 

I cried and howled wordlessly, wheels in my ankles and back stacks whirring at full speed, remembered sensations between holding fragments of Lug’s broken armor pieces and seeing the two’s blood on Luna 2 five centuries ago contrasted with holding the two, seeing them, presently in the glow of their yellow-green and cyan biolights signaling =We love you so much= with dilating luminosity, the two also tearful after placing smooches on my own cheeks. Aileron put an arm around me, and nuzzled next to Lug-

“Oh Arcee…” Anode smiled again, a teeth bared lopsided grin that I knew was her cheeky expression, “are you going to go hit a race track, or are you just that glad to see us while with Aileron? Speaking of wheels, they and this robustness is a good look for you, glad you finally got the bravery and did it, though this is different from your drawings...” she rested her head on my chest, looking up at me. “Very you though.” 

“HAHAHAHAHA!” I stood up and plopped a kiss on her helm while Lug and Aileron chuckled, still pressed up on me. “Oh you, dear, darling Anode…” I patted Lug’s head near my waist before letting my hand fall across the side of her helm to touch her chin. “And sweet, dear Lug… I’ve missed you both so much. I never thought I’d see you again…”

“There were a few times while adventuring with Team Rodimus and co. that we thought we weren’t gonna make it to see you again, but we were glad to hear from Nautica and Whirl that you were doing better last time they saw you,” Lug ran hands up and down my lower back. “Hope we’re not being all too much, I know we broke up but-”

“It’s okay, it’s okay, I did this too,” I pulled an arm away from Lug and put it around Aileron’s shoulders, rubbing her right one steadily, spark warm at her warble and chuckle. “Anode, Lug, Aileron, I’m so glad you three could finally meet in person… dearwing Aileron and I bonded over our loss, and distrust of hierarchy while trying to make the best of the agency we had, and we love to sit looking at polities together… I think you’ll all get along really well.”

“Arcee’s told me so much about you two,” Aileron brought her hands around to be between the four of us, with her two palms open towards Anode and Lug. “I have to agree that we’ll get along fabulously.”

Anode and Lug both placed a hand on hers, the three clasping each other together. I think I’m going to melt - the angst in my frame was gone, warmth and excited calm pulsing in every sensor and circuit instead.

“So we going to finally do Conjunx commitment vows, or what? Suppose we have to wait for us all to really get to know each other,” Anode smirked, and we all cackled again.

“In due time, I think, you jokester, you’re right we have to figure out where we all are in relation to each other,” Lug looked up at me. “You two didn’t cross over the bridge sweetspark, we got worried and decided not to wait. Why the hesitation?”

“I had an anxiety attack,” I smiled at my admittance, proud of myself. “I just- the Cybertron we knew was destroyed only a month ago, and I thought that whole tragic chapter was over, and to know it’s there on the other side of that bridge, and having done more harm than we managed to do, and that you two live orbiting it, only a planetary burn away from another post-war mess… It’s just a lot. I have enough to deal with raising a new generation here and advising New Cybertron and Earth both.” 

In my happiness, I put an arm around Anode, and let myself hope: “let’s see how things go. I might need time, and you probably do too, with all the grief we’ve been through together and that I’ve caused, but I want- I want us to figure things out, and know that we can at the very least have a close friendship. I just want you two to be safe and keep in touch, like Aileron and I do. Please? I can’t bear to lose you to violence again…”

“I promise.” Anode and Lug spoke together, and we all hugged quietly for a little while longer.

“Why don’t we get some rust sticks and go sit on one of the outer low towers?” Aileron stepped back, holding my hand and Lug’s, a glimmer in her optics. “Arcee and I found a nice spot to sit with a beautiful panorama of the polity on and around Metroplex, and of the ocean… there’s a herd of blue whales passing by soon, last I heard from our Titan home, and if we have time, introducing you to Marissa Faireborn, Thundercracker, and their dog Buster, and some of our other pals like Windblade, Chromia, Greenlight, and Lancer...”

“That’s a great idea!” Anode exclaimed while Lug and I nodded. Then Anode inclined her head to the side: “What’s a whale?”

[reginrokkr]

Throwing here some bullet points of what little interactions Dain can have with different characters that have been fermenting in my mind for a long time because thoughts be loud™ and I have to get them out one day.

✦ Dain finding out that a very young Kaeya is in Mondstadt now and not precisely with an Alberich. So while his stay in Mondstadt continues, he watches over him from afar and he realizes that at night he has small escapes to chase some Abyss Mage. This in turn makes Dain want to keep him far from them and he takes on the role to offer him the answers he would otherwise seek from the Abyss Mages as to not run the risk to be manipulated or be sought out by these to take him away. All information he provides him with is adapted to a kid and he's warned to not let those mages influence him or make him go with them anymore, for his safety.

✧ Money and precious intel are matters that not even Dain is immune to not have, so having a small network is a must to him. Ragnvindr for Mondstadt and the Kamisato clan for Inazuma, every time he needs he will make business with them to increase his capital but also to share information he can make use for in a mutually beneficial relationship.

✦ Tensions arise every time Dain and Zhongli cross paths in Liyue, but they never escalate in a hostile manner. Sometimes they feign the other isn't there, other times they will engage into deep conversations. In one of these, Dain throws the seed of doubt on him as to whether it is truly necessary to have a god rule the lives of mortals these days and if his answer is no, that perhaps human should be allowed to take care of their own matters.

✧ 500 years ago the Sacred Sakura was about to wither and with it Inazuma would be even more exposed to dangers, specially in the context of the Cataclysm. Ei was witness of Dain being the one performing its cleansing and, while shaken from the recognition that he has the star-shaped pupils as Khaenri'ahns have, she acknowledges his noble deed. From then onwards, every time she is informed by Yae that he's returned to attend the matters of the Sacred Sakura, she poses no resistance. Only should he show signs of scheming against Inazuma would she interfere in a hostile manner.

✦ Besides having low-profile relationships with the Ragnvindr House and the Kamisato clan of which even descendants are aware of, Dain also has ties with the Sangonomiya clan as a means to have a legit way to descend to Enkanomiya whenever he needs it. It would be more alarming if he were to present himself there out of nowhere than if he requests the priestesses' permission. Since the first time he retrieved the necessary item to perform the festival and so the soil wouldn't become infertile, he's known as the blond-haired hero that even nowadays is known of among the priesthood in the island.

✧ Dottore is the reason why Dain started to keep a close eye on the Fatui, being himself a low-profile attendant in the Akademiya for other purposes. This lead eventually took him to find out that Pierro is part of this organization, whom he knows from the old Khaenri'ahn days. Ever since, while he doesn't act directly, he keeps an eye on them every time he has the chance to do so.

✦ In the context of the Cataclysm, Dain partook in the war waged in the Chasm. Morax and adepti alike noticed him and the latter acknowledge his noble deed despite the contradiction it could suppose all things considered.

✧ 500 years ago also, when Dain lost all faith even in Irminsul, Greater Lord Rhukkadevata as its avatar became an ephemeral light to him to let him know of the great things he can achieve being the kind and noble man he is— partly to make sure that as per his connection to Irminsul he wouldn't do anything to harm it or the world, but a genuine act of concern for him nonetheless. Dain had an eye-opening conversation in her realm of consciousness during her last moments which, even if it didn't hit him in that same instant, with time he gave it the importance it deserves and it did give him strength to move forward.

[smt4flynn]

an original story pilot that I'm going to post on AO3 later at a more reasonable time for an original story I'm going to call 'the cradle of alexandria'

-------------------------------------------

‘It has been an age since the petty fight that broke between the Gods; a civil war that extends too far a reach, that ends, as wars always do, with many an unnecessary death. Humanity shall never be privy to what brings about such a war waged, and the Gods have long since forgotten due to how minuscule the slight is. Yet, though the Gods have since given up and care no longer of the consequences of their war, the humans have not – no, it is fairer to say the humans cannot.

As She, the Goddess Alexandria is slain, a Goddess of whom no one can recall the domain of, Her rage is felt by all who inhabit the Earth. Angered that She shan’t survive the piercing blow from the God Ion, She breathes a curse onto the world: “know now that the follies of the Gods shan’t soon be forgiven. No God shall ever be able to lay foot upon the domain of my Wrath, and I shall encroach upon the land and leave it a husk that can be ruled by not even the weakest of ants.”

And that is how the Cradle of Alexandria births into this world; great is Her anger, that Her corpse becomes the rot that shall infest the world. Great is Her rage, that soon all shall bear the consequences of the Gods that grow fattened and lazy with the decadence of power.

For how is a God to rule, if there is not a land that can be saved to rule?’

A gentle ‘thwack’ follows as Abigail closes his small book with a smack of his hand, the tall knight standing at the mouth of the pestilence that many have deemed the Cradle of Alexandria. Long, blond hair rests over his shoulder, bright violet eyes that are permanently half-lid and dreamy-looking survey over the fleshy cave entrance. He steadies his halberd and leans up against it, palming the book into a small bag that rests on his upper thigh.

Before him is the entrance down to the groaning cave systems of the Cradle of Alexandria; an underground tunnel made of her undying flesh, even if the essence of the Goddess has long since been lost. If the Scriptures are to be believed, then even the Goddess shall be taken to the cycle of worlds, where her essence shall be taken and returned to the world, or she shall be reincarnated the amnesiac babe of humans or Gods, to then henceforth attempt to reclaim her right.

Abigail cannot even recall what her right even is, nor does it matter now that her curse manifests onto the land. The Knight-Commander tilts his head back, free hand coming up to rub thoughtfully at his chin.

Upon her death, those who lived and are not immediately melted by the rot of her grave recall how immediately her flesh melts. Bubbling skin pops to create rivers of meat and blood, the effect acidic enough to burn her saintly robes; out pops her eyes, hanging out by a thin thread of red, while muscles begins to melt from her bones. Her face concaves and the entirety of her ribs are soon bared as her chest melts, her organs sinking into the earth, and her legs bury into the ground as to begin her gradual spread.

At first, the tunnel below is shallow; overtime, however, her pestilence spreads. Now, teeth form neat rows of steps down into what many call her Cradle, almost as if a mockery of civilisation. From her meaty depths crawl out monsters of organs, teeth, and bone. Down within the earth’s womb, her roots grow, for her influence begins its slow spread to destroy the world.

With the Gods damned to not interfere because of the curse of the Goddess, it is the humans who must now suffer.

It is all rather worrying, to put it mildly.

Abigail stares at the mouth of the cave, glancing over to the stairs of teeth that lead down to the depths of her body. But a few weeks ago an adventuring party ventures down into the Cradle, one of some brave enough to see what awaits below, yet not many retreat – not as anything but monsters to be slain.

He glances over to the body of an unfortunate warrior, whose arms are all completely lined with teeth and there are far too many eyes in its head, whose limbs stretch and contort wildly and its abdomen stretches unnaturally. An unfortunate soul that Abigail recognises, briefly, as the warrior who enthusiastically requests permit for his and his party to venture into the Cradle.

The others accompanying him have not been seen since, though his fate is not that unique when Abigail compares it to the others whom he recognises leaving the Cradle. He exhales out deeply and tilts his head back, eyes slipping shut to avoid the harshness of the sun. If it is not for the malicious site of the Cradle, Abigail’s presence within the forests will look almost picturesque; a beautiful youth dressed within the knightly vestments of gold, white, and royal blue. Many corpses surround him, besides the one of the Goddess that fuses gradually with the land, and he bathes in the direct light of the sun even as the atmosphere here is horrid enough to drain away all of the warmth.

He reaches for the pack by his side soon after, bringing out the permit of the young man and his party. Soon, he must notify the family of his death and loss, should he have any, and find any lover(s) he may have as to break the news down.

“Knight-Commander Hugo!” Abigail folds the permit once more. Blood stains the whites of his gloves, making him look dreadfully like a mad surgeon, and he is careful not to stain any important texts before he slips the piece of paper back softly into his pack. “We have surveyed the perimeters and have not found anything. Our rangers and rogues are scouting forward, but we knights have returned for further orders!”

Before him stands Ludo, dressed in raiment similar to his own yet without the badges on his shoulders to denote Abigail’s high rank (clearly); a few strands of his short brown hair sticks to his forehead, sweaty from having been on the run around the perimeters while he, himself, spends his time killing off straggler monsters. For now, they are not enough of a threat to demand the need of an army, though they are all well aware that that will not last. Aquamarine eyes stare into Abigail’s violet, bright with hope and shining patiently, awaiting orders.

Abigail folds an ankle over the other and rests his foot on the tips of his toes, leaning against halberd before he kicks his foot back down to the earth. Once more, white boots are painted a deep scarlet, melding seamlessly with the crimson rot of the Cradle’s corpse. “Call them back,” he says smoothly, “we shan’t find anything nor anyone else, no reason to make them work more than they need to. We will return to the Capitol and report what we have found.”

Ludo hesitates. “Is there... really nothing else, around, Knight-Commander?”

He smiles wryly down at Ludo. “Nothing and no one, Ludo.” he rubs his chin once more then looks over to the mouth of the cave. Once more, despite the morbid image of ribs crowning the hole that leads down to the undulating walls of the Cradle, there is nothing but the smell of a sweet nature’s morning, as though a hysterical contrast against the visuals. “We should return and try not to dwell. Have the mages check how far the Cradle had spread, and reinforce the wards around the city. More of the monsters have bred, and I doubt they have lingered here long.”

“I will notify the lead mage immediately.” Ludo salutes once more before he runs off, Abigail watching him with noted disinterest, glances back over to the Cradle that groans softly with its eternal pain; he picks his halberd back up before marching back to the city so that he may get to the Capitol. He will wait at the opening to the clearing first of course, as protocol demands, before he is to return empty-handed once again.

After all, the Cradle of Alexandria shall continue to claim victims and continue to let its roots grow, until someone is finally able to reach deep enough to see what lays at the bottom of the Cradle, and perhaps bring an end to the plague that is a Goddess’s growing rage.

[legaciestold]

@renfie1ds

she's ophelia floating in the water with her hair splayed about, sinking slowly into the depths of a fractured mind. there are moments, brief, where clarity finds her. flashes of memory of a child walking hand in hand with her mother and father along the river walk. smiling. happy. carefree and unknowing of the harshness of the world or the venomous dangers which lurked in the shadows. lillian tries to grasp onto those memories when they come, threads of who she is that can break her from her chained fate. yet-- they wash away quickly when he comes to her now as when the master strigoi came to her then on those first few nights he fed on her and invaded her delirious dreams warping them. she was a girl searching for truth. a girl searching for a father she refused to believe would have abandoned her of his own free-will. he'd seemed to know her father, for that had been what he had told her, lured her with until she'd fallen into his web with no ability to escape it. she'd fought with the same fiery passion she'd gotten from her mother. she'd screamed and rebelled against the way he'd tried to twist her mind. the way he'd try to alter her memories of her father, her belief in him. but it had become so hard when his fangs had pierced her skin and he'd given her so much of his own blood mixing their lifeforces. the threads of truth she held onto were drifting away in the wind.

she was to be one of his brides, his very favorite at the moment, perhaps because of the control having her would solidify for him over his rebelling servant. perhaps because he garnered some enjoyment in evoking horror. your father cared not for you or your mother. why else would he have left you? why else would he remain with me instead of having gone to you? but i came for you. i have given you the greatest gift and you shall be at my side. you shall be one with me. above your father. above humanity. the words echo deep within her mind, within her being when he visits her in the night, twisting and shoving at the notions she'd held before. you love me. you will protect me above all others. he tells her. and she repeats the horror of it because the shadow self she becomes when her real self is locked away believes it wholeheartedly. but there's something that lingers in her, a fire in her soul that refuses to be stamped out. something that always tinges the words in a sense of confusion. in a sense that there is something amiss. something wrong. something that doesn't fit. he gets angry with her when he senses such in those moments and despite what she's been made into she loses blood all the same (the master strigoi could feed on human or strigoi alike after all), made to feel guilt and then a surge of affection when he'd grant her his forgiveness. when he gives her gifts to feed on as if she's an animal instead of a young woman.

he calls her one evening, a new maze of a home she's been brought into. she's the only one brought here, not his other brides and it both fills her with a strange sense of a pride and horror though she doesn't understand where the horror comes from. she doesn't understand the confusion of her mind or the warring concepts within it. but it is a war that's flaring up and waging more and more as he brings up her father. the father that left her. the father that didn't care. that's not right. no. her father loved her. no, her father left her. flashes of real and distorted memories plagued her dreams the day before, plaguing her in a way she doesn't understand. a part of her thinks to mention it to caligula for surly he has the answers. she was to trust him in all things was she not? and yet, some deeper part of her warns her not to. it wins out, somehow, a few moments more of clarity within her. then she's presented into a room, an inhumanness to her features though her eyes and hair and face still so much the same as they had been when she was young. she gets the feeling this is a test of some sort when she enters the room and refers to him as her love.

but then her senses pick up someone else, her eyes searching the room until they fall on the shadow of the man she'd once known. her father. the father that left her. the father that loved her? the father that hadn't come for. her mind can't put the pieces together in a way that makes sense. strain crosses her features for a moment. father. father i've searched for you. i've finally found you. her eyes are screaming it, for the briefest of moments, an attempt to step forward before a look from the master strigoi halts her. as if he's sensing something building within her and invading her mind right there, pushing what he doesn't want there out. he steps toward her, run's a hand up her arm to stand around her, then up her body until it's wrapped around her and cupping her neck and face from behind. she leans into it because that shadow self is back again. 'she shall be my greatest bride. is she not lovely renfield?' he taunts. and then he questions her. 'do you know who this is lillian? do you not have anything to say to your father?'

she turns her head to look upon the strigoi and then turns to look back at her father. "why should i speak to the man who left my mother to die and i to be alone? the only gift he gave me was that such led you to me. for you love me as no one else." it's almost as if there is a glaze over her eyes, as if she's enthralled. he seems to garner some form of a smirk from her words, seeming pleased with her. yet perhaps the true test is to come. 'that may be yet will you not speak with him for a time, now, while have things to attend to? you both shall reside here after all. when i return i shall have a delicious treat for you.' she nods then, caligula releasing her and walking out of the room. but she does not look upon her father again, instead standing there with a rather dazed look about her.