#be so fucking for real i'm dead fucking serious
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For the transmasc voices: (tw suicidal thoughts, transandrophobia)
I'm messaging on behalf of my son. I'm NB, wife is transfem, our child is transmasc. He's only 11. He came out a few years ago, is allowed to freely explore and express, and at home he has a great support system.
But he has ALREADY struggled with suicidal thoughts, anxiety, and stress, not just from cishet classmates but from queer peers. He has ALREADY tried to APOLOGIZE for IDing as masc, due to intracommunity reactionary hate. We are ALREADY doing damage control, we have him in therapy, we make sure to celebrate him and lift him up at every opportunity.
He's fucking ELEVEN YEARS OLD and is already being heavily negatively stressed by our own fucking community. His PEERS are also, only 11-13 years old.
This intracommunity bullshit, this deliberate misandry and transandrophobia, is contagious. The children are ALWAYS watching and the vast majority of them do NOT have parents 'in the know' or even supportive, let alone any kind of digital supervision; they SEE YOU. They INTERNALIZE WHAT YOU SAY. They SPREAD IT and they are MIMICKING YOUR FIGHTS.
And when our community screams 'fuck men' 'men are trash' 'yes all men' 'they deserve this' those little caveats of 'oh but not trans men!!' don't actually do shit for anyone except make y'all pat yourselves on the back for being soooo progressive and inclusive. Worse still when they don't even bother with the caveats and just straight up refuse to ever consider nor allow anyone ELSE to consider the unique intersection (yes!! Intersectional fucking theory have y'all heard of it!!!) of both privilege and oppression experienced by transmascs, which is different from the unique *intersection* of oppressions experienced by transfems, which is still different from the unique *intersectional experiences* of still others, and insist no, actually, they're all only the same and actually only transfems can speak at all about any of this and trans men don't have unique experiences and can't have their own language and blah blah blah blah fucking blah.
I can literally see (and foot the bill for!) the harm y'all are doing to yourselves, each other, and to the next generation of queer kids and allies and I am so fucking tired of it. Reactionary hate is communal fucking poison and it ALWAYS involves friendly fire.
oh my god i am mortified but thank you so much for sending this. first of all, i wanted to deeply apologize for what is happening to your son, i have more to say about and to him later, but i want you to know i am very glad you chose to reach out. this affected me in a very real way. i'm not being funny here. a lot of asks don't really get to me, but this struck me like an arrow to the heart and i seriously need people to very carefully read this ask and internalize it. im serious. even if it makes you cry, please re-read it a couple of times. even if you seriously think it's okay to hate men. read this.
men don't just pop into the world men. they're boys first a lot of the time. would you people seriously fucking rather see dead trans boys than living trans men? because that is what you're doing. your incessant gender essentialist bullshit is legitimately getting trans CHILDREN scarred for fucking life and potentially killed. you are potentially actually for real taking a life when you say these things- but are you so happy knowing that there's childrens' blood on your hands?
your son deserves so much better than this holy SHIT. an 11 year old should NOT be having suicidal thoughts, especially over their GENDER. this is not petty internet drama anymore. this is affecting the real world. this is affecting real people. y'all seem to forget that there's a living, breathing person behind every single account you interact with (aside from obvious bots). there are people behind these posts. and you are genuinely affecting them. sure it sounds like a quirky clapback to say "all men should die" or whatever but what about when you say that to someone and it actually kills a man? what about when you're genuinely responsible for ending a life by what you've said and done?
are you prepared to console that man's family? are you prepared to apologize for what you did? are you prepared to understand that this has real life consequences and can literally tear families apart? are you prepared to understand that many parents, including mothers, love their sons? that many people love their relatives who are men? that many people love their husbands and partners? that this would hurt women in a very real way? whether or not you hate all men doesn't matter, but not all women think like this, and this can and will devastate real people in real time. this will hurt women way more than you think.
i wanted to say that i'm glad he has a good support system with you. it must be very comforting to know he has a NB parent to help advocate for him as a trans child. a child. i can't get over that. he should be living his life carefree. he should be playing with other kids, discovering new hobbies, learning about how other people go about their lives, and having fun, but instead he's getting tortured and mocked? for what reason? he's not a tyrant now. he's a boy. boys don't have any power in society. children are not an oppressive class. holy shit
you are doing a great thing by advocating for him. i will do my best to make sure i can, too. i don't need to know your or his name for right now, but i will make sure that i tell his story, because this is beyond fucked up. people need to understand this isn't about views on tiktok and likes on instagram. this is about real people who are hurting. you don't deserve to have to see your child go through all of this intense therapy and pain and suffering. this needs to come to an end.
if you want to share this part of the message with him, i'd like to address him directly. i just wanted to say, that i'm 32 years old, and i realized i was a trans man when i was about 20. i didn't learn the word transgender until i was 19 years old. if i had an awesome NB parent who helped me learn about it at your age, i would've been out as transmasculine, too! i was scared for a while, but some of the happiest years of my life have been while i've been out as a trans guy. i wear what i want now, i talk how i want to, i present how i want to, i love who i want to, and i don't let any of this invalidate me for who i am as a man. i only talk to people who respect me, and there are tons of people out there who love us and see us for who we really are
you're not going to deal with this forever. people are being really, really mean right now, but it's not going to be like this forever. there are a lot of other transmascs out there. if you find other trans boys around your age, do your best to stick with them if they're good to you. it's okay to be a trans boy and its okay to want to be friends with other trans boys. you're not a bad person. you're not mean. you're an awesome kid who's taking the time to explore gender now that it's something you can understand. that's really cool, why wouldn't that be cool?
try not to let them get to you. they are not confident in how they identify and how they feel about themselves. they're taking it out on you. your life matters, it matters so much. other trans boys out there will be so happy to know you exist. you deserve a long, happy life. there's nothing wrong with being a boy or man. we're not bad people. we're capable and deserving of love just like everyone else. your gender isn't anyone else's business. chase your happiness.
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Me and the family got to talking about this over dinner last night and I want to bring up some more examples of "Childhood movies are actually really fucked up and dark"
Ya'll remember Tarzan? That wholesome movie about a mother gorilla taking in an orphaned child it found in the jungle?? You guys remember how in the first ten minutes a baby gorilla was picked off by a jaguar and then we saw Tarzan's dead parents??
You remember how Clayton died from falling from a tree and got strung up by the vines and snapped his neck?? Cuz I didn't! A part of me is grateful child me didn't clock how DARK this death was, I just assumed he fell and hit the ground, nope, got hung by vines. Super great childhood movie
My mothers point: Anyone grow up watching Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? The magical, whimsical movie of a car that comes to life and takes it family on an adventure?? Remeber how that same movie had a villain literally called "The child catcher" Does this one even NEED explaining for how utterly fucked this villain is?? Chitty Chitty Bang Bang: introducing 70's and 80's kids to the horrors of child kidnapping
Another point from my parents, Sleeping beauty: a classic fairy-tale of a princess being woken up by true loves kiss by prince charming. Apparently - take this one with a grain of salt because I actually don't know if this one is true, though honestly I wouldn't be shocked given how Disney is - but allegedly, there is now a censorship warning at the start of this movie because there is "Non-consensual kiss". I assume this appears if you watch it on a streaming service? I tried to check but the movie isn't on Netflix
The closest thing I could find about this was this article about a mum wanting the classic story removed from the curriculum - This mum wants Sleeping Beauty removed from her child’s curriculum - BBC Three
I don't actually think they've put a warning at the start of the movie, but even so - if I may add my opinion - uhm, this is horse shit?? It's a FAIRYTALE?? I'm going to say this as simply as I can: It's not REAL. A women isn't one day going to cursed by an evil witch, prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel, and fall into a death like sleep.
100% teach kids about consent, absolutely....BUT, now I'm no parent BUT, is a make believe fairy-tale scenario really the best example of how consent works??
Felt like this got really serious out of nowhere but the point my parents where trying to make here was that the warning about the kiss of all things seemed...odd, considering what happens in the rest of the movie. Being an evil witch and putting a curse on an innocent child from birth? A-okay, cuz we know that'll never happen. But non-consensually kissing a women who was put into a sleep like death and trapped in a castle by an evil witch?? Nu-uh we're gunna have to draw the line in the sand there
This last point isn't really related to anything above but I was picking up paint a few days ago, and I saw a Mufasa the movie book in the shop. A book. Of the movie. They literally took the poster image of cub Mufasa and his grown up reflection and put it on a book. Disney is REALLY trying to make money of this thing still
You guys remember when Disney villains where the most god-awful, manipulative, zero morals down right evil nightmare fuel pieces of shit??
You remember the coachman from Pinocchio?? That guy who took little boys to an island he owned where they could be as reckless as they wanted, only to turn them into donkeys and sell them in labor?? Mister I make my profit off of kidnapped children Coachman?? You remember Cruella de Vill?? Remember how she stole 99 puppies? Remember how she was going to skin them for a fur coat?? The name Count Frollo ring any bells?? That one guy who excused all his heinous acts against people in lower classes by saying it was in the name of God?? Guy who condemned Quasimodo to the bell tower and tried to burn Esmerelda at the steak when she refused his lust for her??
Yeah me neither
#More examples of Disney buckling under pressure#Disney I stress you are ALLOWED to make classic fairytales#Little kids don't care about this shit they care about being a pretty princess or a brave knight#They can learn about this stuff when they NEED to know it#You can make villains awful pieces of shit#You can make a classic love story with talking animals#Please just make SOMETHING worth while again#Disney#Palette talks
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naur bc i have thoughts....
#this whole tyler the creator thing is......#like idk man#1. i have not seen taylor fans talk THAT MUCH about those lyrics#2. the tweets i've seen mostly consist of the multiple times he's rapped about r***#so there's that#and 3. love or hate taylor like do whatever but why are we as a society allowing her (a woman) to be constantly yelled at by media over the#stupidest little things but him (a man) is allowed to rap about the most disgusting things and it's always 'you don't know tyler' like#be so fucking for real i'm dead fucking serious#him saying he doesn't care but at the same time saying something proves he fucking cares that people are calling him out#it's just so mind boggling#like i have never felt one way or another about him but after the other really just so fucking gross lyrics (not including the ones about#taylor) i'm not having it...#and if any bitch tries to defend his ass you're the problem#just because people are now being exposed to his older music doesn't make it okay that it happened#also i am in no way saying go cancel him bc honestly cancel culture is so fucking dumb#like it never truly holds anyone accountable#my point is why are we making it okay at all to say shit that fucking gross#and that goes for literally anyone ever#not just him#anne marie shut up pls :)
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i have officially returned. ask me anything.
#random thoughts#i'll probably answer it tomorrow because i'm tired. i don't know why.#ciel if you see this i've been nicer to myself these past few days following your birthday. taking care of myself in general aspects.#which i sort of hate myself for but it's okay because. uh. i won't be like this forever. i'll be better at what i'm trying to do i promise.#new year's resolution is not fucking with me.........#oh also!! i've been sort of feeling like a dead person at times. and also like a cockroach. i have had to repeatedly tell myself that#i'm not dead i'm not dead!!!!#because i'm not. obviously. and i know i'm not. my brain is just silly. it likes to tell me i am things i am not like book characters.#and recently my mother got me my own rosary and we've been practicing praying together with my brother.#can you imagine how bad it must be for me to turn to christianity as a coping mechanism? not even when i was terrorized with death thoughts#not even in august for fuck's sake.#but it's actually not that bad. though i think i like the idea of organized religion more than i like being a part of it.#also i feel like my being catholic (mostly non-practicing) is betraying the queer community somehow. like. queer people have suffered#so much because of the christian church in general. so it's like. being christian is weird when i'm also queer.#but also then i feel weird when i try to do things in relation to christianity. like. put saint in my artist name.#that feels blasphemous i don't know. is it?????? it's not that serious either way but. augh.#i am going to write a song about this. also fellow christians is it okay to use the lyric 'uselessly clutching her rosary' or is that bad?#because i mean. technically. the she i'm referring to sort of is. because god isn't solving any of our problems.#he's just fucking. watching. if he's even real.#(and no my disappearance isn't related to the catholicism thing it's something else. as in the one thing i haven't told anyone else but cie#and an irl friend. if you are ciel then i am completely open to talking about said thing.#otherwise i will continue to drop cryptic little notes on my blog because I AM SILLY. {: )#going to play roblox now and maybe say hello to you fuckers on discord for a bit of fun. goodbye.
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Tonight is the comedy game!!!
Better send the party to the druid's wife's funeral!
Honestly, that's not even funny, it's just that my druid player gave me a reborn dusk elf and told me to fuck her up.
We're also probably going to have a little bit of a Moment in Vallaki proper because our rogue is going to run into both her estranged siblings and her boy toy's wife. I legit just remembered Valeria is still alive a year prior to our serious game.
(Am I ready to introduce Vasili? I should ask my GF before I surprise her with her character's BF and his wife in Vallaki instead of Immol.)
Hmm. Fuck.
#g: real housewives#y'all have no idea how weird it is running a game in my barovia that takes place before our serious Curse of Strahd campaign#because like... the warlock and the ranger are just Out There Somewhere#like as npcs#and these evil PCs are just having their best Dracula Dead and Loving It time#At least I can mostly reuse my maps?#I say this like I have maps for tonight. Theater of the mind babeyyyyy.... unless everyone out-votes the bard in which case I'm fucked#Said with love tbh. This game is so unserious so I never really stress about it
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now, i KNOW people are sooo horny for prince sidon. and i *guess* i get it? but my standout interactions with him were
him repeatedly interrupting me as i'm sneaking & battling desperately upstream through the rain towards zora's domain, to remind me that he's there, watching, not helping me, being unceasingly chipper
him giving me inadequate instructions to prepare for the attack on vah ruta, leading to me having no idea what the deal with the giant ice cubes is or how to handle them, resulting in me immediately getting hit by said cubes. at which point he contemptuously shouted "GET A GRIP, LINK" at me.
#keeping it fun and funky fresh#personal#matty plays#when he told me to get a grip i was like OHHH FUCK THIS GUY FOR REAL#i ended up using like SIXTY ARROWS that you DIDN'T LEAD ME TO EXPECT TO NEED#literally every single normal arrow i had in my stash plus like ten ice arrows ($$!)#i'm SO MAD about the game design choices that led to vah ruta being it seems like almost invariably the first divine beast you do#when the approach is SO hard & frustrating#like. the main quest immediately sends you to kakariko village. while there you overhear ppl talking about the fairy fountain#you go find the fairy fountain. if you go PAST the fairy fountain the ravine opens up into a valley/new map territory#the sheikah tower is immediately visible from the opening of that ravine. it's not too hard to get to#you get there. there's a zora who tells you to go see prince sidon RIGHT AWAY HE'S RIGHT DOWN THERE GO NOW#(the nearest shrine also has another zora who says the same thing)#you can glide right over to where sidon is. he jumps over and says YOU HAVE TO HELP ME *URGENTLY* THE WHOLE REALM WILL FLOOD#as opposed to getting to like. any of the other divine beasts. which are on the other corners of the continent#and protected by serious ambient environmental hazards#and are just like. ''oh this is scary/inconvenient/might threaten us At Some Point''#the game is very much like You Should Do Ruta First (both structurally & narratively)#and then Oops Ruta Is Very Hard Aah Eto Bleh 🧊🧊🧊💥💀#anyways i am a sidon hater SORRY! he is a thoughtless jerk!!#(i am also a hater of daruk & revali bc they were SO unsupportive of zelda) (but they are dead now so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)#((i AM an urbosa/zelda shipper shhhh))
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HALLEJUAH!! I REMEMBERED HOW TO ACTUALLY FINISH WRITING SOMETHING FOR A CHANGE!!
Of course, it's not any of the fics I wanted to finish. I went back to what is essentially my bread-and-butter now and wrote a short-ish, random OrangeHook fluff. But considering how much writing's been a struggle as of late, I'm just glad that I successfully finished something. I was back in one of those stretches where I couldn't seem to write much of anything. And this fic isn't about their age difference or Hook being a cuddlebug, so...progress?
Unless I decide I completely hate it (which is always a possibility) expect something to drop on Valentine's Day, tis the season, after all.
#What is wrong with you Sam you should not be allowed to write#Small victories you know?#Will I ever get sick of OrangeHook?? Apparently not#Can't even remember the last time they interacted on screen but that ain't stopping my brain LOL#On a more serious note - I really do hope that I can get back into the swing of things and make some real progress#On the bigger fics I want to work on#I want to finish the messy angst OrangeHook fic at some point even if it's unlikely to appeal to anyone#Annnnnd deep down in my cold dead heart I still wanna make an honest attempt at that DG Dead Dove fic#Even though that would be even more unappealing + a huge undertaking because that bitch would be loooooooooong#Also I had a slightly less angsty OrangeHook idea recently about them having their first fight and I wanna write that too for some reason#And there's still a part of me that really wants to continue Business/Pleasure because I have soooo many ideas for that AU#But that would require me to get over my inability to write smut#And I don't know how to do that (would appreciate any advice on that if you've got some...)#But at the same time I don't wanna beat myself up for not being able to write much - if anything - most days#This is a hobby after all - it's supposed to be fun#There ain't no deadline and it's not like I'm letting anybody down#Just gotta do at my own place#And write whatever absolute trash I want to write 😈#My tags are always so obsessive like SHUT THE FUCK UP SAM#But if you've actually read all these - hey. Thanks. Love ya 😘
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I am cursed with the absolute inability to even reference a thing that I don't know enough about, because someone could see me being wrong and I don't want to disappoint them, which is why I am watching the original Godzilla (1954, subtitled) on one screen and doing some pixel art on the other and doing some writing under that (days when my ADHD meds work are very strange to me. Who is this Motherfucker Unlimited who can multitask like this and how is he possibly me), and I am like, ridiculously pleased with how much I do not need the subtitles for any of this.
#yes this is writing research. don't worry about it. sometimes the funny little robot guys might wanna watch a movie. it's fine#but I haven't seen it so that's gonna be a problem and I guess I also have to see it now. okay#very good so far tho actually. dunno why I didn't expect that. I guess I have seen too much of the goofy-ass later ones#and forgot the original is *dead fucking serious* about the whole business#also for a movie I've never seen or been interested in I sure did somehow pick one with relevant themes what the heck.#I say 'pick' but like everything else that happens this was just what the little movie in my brain dictated and I'm just going with it.#strangely canon now that quite a few reploids just have a surprising interest in old media#(tho the tokusatsu/kaiju angle absolutely makes sense from a real world perspective since that's where a ton of the inspo is even from)
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pharma really is such an interesting case. one thing i’ve always felt with pharma is that he absolutely doesn’t want consequences. and facing up to it requires a lot of looking at and showing people what he’s done and you know. the consequences. i mean hell he’d rather start a plague than say “hey i got coerced into doing a very bad thing by the djd”
I do understand what you mean about Pharma not wanting to face consequences, but on the other hand, I kind of understand why Pharma made a plague rather than admit to medical malpractice/murder? Because like, the thing that I don't see brought up often enough with regards to Pharma is that blackmail... is blackmail. Like, as someone who's unfortunately been on the receiving end of blackmail, the entire point of blackmailing someone is that you corner them into doing bad things by convincing them that they CAN'T turn to an authority figure to ask for help. Like, the person doing the blackmailing generally convinces the person who's getting blackmailed that if they try to reach out for help, the law/authorities/etc either won't care about their predicament or will punish them for the bad thing they did that they're getting blackmailed about.
I kind of feel like (and this isn't an attack on you, just a commentary about the nature of blackmail) when someone like Ratchet looks at Pharma and says "but you could've called for help or shut down the clinic or anything!", it kind of ignores the fact that...... when you're being blackmailed you're fucking terrified, and people who are terrified generally don't jump to the most rational, safe solutions possible? When you add in the fact that Pharma was blackmailed by Tarn of the DJD, notorious hater of Autobots and fanatic leader of a torture club, it's not hard to imagine that Pharma was both afraid and in pain (or threat of pain) while at Delphi and thus wouldn't be thinking straight about it.
I don't know, like. Yeah, on one hand Pharma made a plague and killed a bunch of people to try and cover up his crimes and maintain his career. But he didn't just do it for ego related reasons, he was also almost certainly facing threats of torture and death.
#squiggle answers#pharma apologism#i think i'm biased on this issue so anyone can come in here and add their thoughts or correct me#i guess it just bothers me because like. i've kind of been in that situation (not as serious as pharma's) where i didn't ask for help#and when i got in trouble for not asking for help afterwards and instead choosing to lie or go behind someone's back or whatever#it was generally bc i was more afraid of punishment by The People In Charge#than i was afraid of lying or breaking the rules or doing other bad things#and when i got accused (by the people in charge) of seeing myself as above the rules or thinking i was better/smarter than them#it always pissed me off because i was like. bro i didn't lie to you for fun and games i lied to you because i was afraid#that if i asked you for help you would just shun me or get pissed off at me and punish me#also re: the blackmail i was a victim of. the thing about that is it was over something ultimately petty (stupid internet drama)#and i was PROBABLY never in any real danger but like. the issue was that i FELT like i was in danger#fear is powerful. fear of being threatened at any time or having the things you care about taken away is especially powerful#i had nightmares p much once a week for months during the ordeal and still sometimes do now#like idk i really am biased on this matter but like. just bc pharma made the plague to cover up his crimes#doesn't mean that that's the ONLY reason is what i'm saying#when ppl lie and cover up things about that it's not just about ego but about dumb animal terror#and i mean. to get back to the pharma apologism brand. ratchet KNEW pharma was being blackmailed but he fucking ditched him anyways#this is the guy who was supposed to be his bestie of millions of years and he fucking told pharma he was dead to him#and that's the guy who pharma thought would UNDERSTAND. imagine what he thought other autobots would think of him#also i have a theory that tarn probably psychologically tortured pharma by telling him the autobots would just lock him up for his crimes#as a way to get pharma to not tell anyone and keep supplying him cogs. because you know. blackmail
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Girls I am on the fucking brink for realsies this time.
#I am on Tumblr Desktop for the first time in probably years and first of all. it sucks ass#but also. what the fuckkkkkkkk is happening to me#somebody has cursed me. for real.#(pause to say I do enjoy typing on keys. I have missed that if nothing else)#anyways. so first. didn't find my debit card and had to report it lost and get a replacement that could take up to 2 weeks to get.#so no money for 2 weeks. yippee.#and like 2 hours ago my phone shut off for no reason and now I cannot get it to turn back on. I've been trying for 2 hours.#it's not dead. it didn't get wet or dropped. it didn't overheat. it just shut off and will not come back on.#so for 2 hours I was completely unable to complain on here. which is the real issue tbh#I have NO money and NO phone. I can't even fucking buy another phone right now if I had the money.#what's next??? my car?????? (probably)#but like. I can't fucking do this right now#what do I dooooooooooooooo#I'm gonna fucking kill myself. I'm sorry I know we're not supposed to say that anymore cuz positivity or whatever#but I'm so serious. I can't take another mishap that's gonna set me back several years financially. I'm so fucking exhausted#anyways!! sparkle on !!
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I usually just squeeze the carotid a little bit letting you continue to breath
If I am in a mood I might restrict breathing too though.
#I am so in tune with you I can be trusted#it becomes like you are choking yourself#and I want enough mind aware what I am doing to you....in class ... well we needed to fix those ears#you see me all loving on you but meanwhile my super conscious mind has sent my wrist shooters into your canals#to be 17 and convinced medincine is in fact useless#and so FINE I WILL DO IT MYSELF and I never changed#you ponder over the curious look I gave you when you said your ears are busted but I took that as just not quite where they need to be#me: serious as fuck for a moment of thought of silence#I didn't care about the spoken words between us we obviously didn't need them#and it must have been the blonde hair and makeup (not much! just enough!) that threw me off#oh I am a sucker for what my eyes see#my visuals are so crazy I convince myself hallucinations are real#sometimes they are but it usually involves something cool not that whack shit#I need my weapon for screaming commentary on my thoughts sometimes#“no! what are you doing we need to kill them all!”#he calls out Dead! suddenly and I'm like son did you call me in here?#and when I go in I have to pick up one empty can otherwise it is a wasted trip#mmm the things I had to do to bring back a once dead#but really I am envious of how chill he is#and as a father that makes me proud#you know me sometimes I am like alright let's be funny now#he will start a rant and it turns into some goddamn Dave Chappelle bit#well in This Book it's Cannonical#or cannonicall#and yes the little girl in you that liked hanging out with me also wants to hang out with him#and you should he's fucking hilarious#best birthday present mom ever got I bet though#her old broken shell was able to trip out on her birthday anyway#she cried#I had cried enough over him...
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Oh, yes, I just love your unannounced sleepover where you both come back from the bar after carefully avoiding telling me that's where you were going, and also neglecting to tell me when you'd be home! I definitely do not want to knock you on your ass and take a bat to your dome! That would be rude and unnecessary :)
Oh yes, please do start talking about shit amongst yourselves and make me feel isolated and othered in ny own room! These moments are what I live for, of course. Naturally. Who would ever have any issues with this arrangement at all?
#txt#might delete this later but i also might not because my irritation and rage is real and i shouldnt have to so constantly discard it#i am so tired of constantly putting it aside#i want your blood in my fucking teeth. and it's your fault i want it there- certainly- because I TRY. I try so hard not to feel this way#but eventually you get tired of those little games too#okay I drafted this for a minute bc idk if this fucker is actually spending the night or not i just know he took off his belt. BUT THEN ONE#+ OF THESE FUCKERS DECIDED TO START TALKING ABOUT SPIDERS. A THING THAT I HAVE A VERY BAD PHOBIA ABOUT. I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU#thinking of killing and maiming and maiming and killing and killing and shredding and tearing and killing and-#seriously though what. the fuck. you even go ''oh they're not gonna like this'' THEN HOW ABOUT YOU DONT FUCKING SAY IT#ohh and now you're sitting here making plans for when you go out without me next! I'm going to make you a bloody smear on my fucking floor#i am going to Dissect you. I'm going to rip you apart and feed you to the local strays and csrrion birds.#not even getting up and leaving right fucking now would assuage me. i wish i wasn't so full of fucking hate but you just keep adding fuel +#+to the fire#im so tired. I'll come back with a ''im fine now'' if he fucking leaves but im going to seethe now. im so fucking angry.#how do you fucks continually just bounce between the topics that makes me feel Most Violent Towards You? literally how do you not realize i#+ want you dead at this point? how do you not realize the grave you've dug for yourselves in my mind?#i dont fucking mask it that well. i know i dont. and still you fucking do this#((part of why it being a bar specifically that bothers me besides the very deliberate and careful avoidance of mentioning it to me is that#+*one of you is at serious risk for becoming an alcoholic. why the fuck are you being enabled this way?*))#((if i was dating someone with a genetic predisposition of alcoholism i would make your regular dates nights- idk- NOT THE FUCKING BAR +#+ DISTRICT. DO YOU EVEN FUCKING CARE ABOUT THEM? DO YOU? This fucking boils my god damn blood.))#(ultimately its their decision if they want to fucking drink yeah sure whatever YOU DONT NEED TO REGULARLY AND READILY ENABLE IT. BASTARD.)#(If they want to drink so fucking bad- if they push for the bars- JUST BUY SOME ALCOHOL AND BRING IT FUCKING HERE. It limits how much they+#+can have for one- and it would isolate me from you two less! just as an added fucking bonus! but no very unreasonable of me. what was i +#+thinking? clearly not about them 🙄)#i might be a little out of line here. i can admit that. but if anyone spent a week in my fucking shoes back when they first got together +#+and then now? you would fucking understand.#and they just. keep. talking. to eachother. no attempts to include me. not even glances my way. like always.#''oh nothing will change'' IT FUCKING CHANGED. I want to hurt you so bsdly for that lie with ever passing day. do you even know it was a li#do you? anyway was abt to post this and noticed a gif i have of a woman ripping her shirt off so im going to stare at that until im calm ig.
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Phrases I bet were said on the batfamily patrols without context.
Tim in his comm: No. he's not dead- *casually checks Jason's pulse* yeah there's nothing to worry about.
--
Jason nudging a mugger with his feet: He'll live.
--
Dick: No one tells any of this to Batman
Batman, behind him: No one tells what to Batman
Dick:
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Robin: You said Redhood should stop killing do I look like Redhood to you?
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Jason: This * shows a pair off rubber bullets to the renchman * were not letal, now this * shows them a pair of real bullets* are.
*reloads*
Jason: Start running.
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Dick at the comm: What do you mean next to the Batsburguer? I am literally-- Hood. Hood. Jason. sto- STOP SCREAMING AT ME- I am literally- SHUT UP! Jason- I swear to god, I will hang up on you... WE ARE LITERALLY IN FRONT OF THE BATSBURGUER,... What do you mean "what car" what do you think? We're... We're next to - sorry - Next to the old lady behind the drive thru... fuck sake You know what? Just send us your location- Just- Yeah...
Damian, looking at his phone with the location:..... Dumbass you're in the wrong Batsburguer.
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The signal, making eye contact with the other batkids: I do not know them.
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Damian Robin: What are you doing in here?
Tim in his civil clothes: Are you serious? This is literally my rooftop. I live in this house.
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Literally everyone to Oracle: Do NOT call Batman
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Oracle: I'm calling batman.
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Batman, clearly lost, lying through his teeth while gripping the batmobile's steering wheel: This is my city, we do not need a map.
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Jason: Oh my god, you two are such drama queens the kid just dislocated his arm. Hey. Hey Robin. Do that thing you did last time- He's going to be okay. Robin do that thing.
Dick: D-Robin do not-
Batman, at the same time: Robin do not
Damian currently running towards a wall to relocate his arm: *crack.* There. Let's go.
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Steph: Technically he ran in front of my van so if we're being fair-
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Robin squinting: ...Is that Harley Quinn in a Batman suit?
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Harley: This is so unfair! Why he always send the interns to fight me!
Robin Damian, done with her shit: Maybe because you fight like a little boy
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Spoiler: Yo mama
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Nightwing: Let's do the flying Robin-
Robin Jason: What do you mean flying Robin? *Nightwing grabs him* WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. NIGHTWING- NIGHTWING YOU MOTHERF-
Nightwing: YEET
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Redhood:
Nighwing: What?
Redhood: Let's do the flying Robin.
Nighwing: ⁿᵒ⁻
--
#batman#batfam#batfam shenanigans#jason todd#dick grayson#tim drake#bruce wayne#damian wayne#stephanie brown#duke thomas#barbara gordon#nightwing#redhood#robin#the signal#oracle
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Task Force 141 x Reader: Picture Day
NSFW 18+
When a guy keeps sending you unsolicited pictures, you impulsively reach out to your Task Force for help in an... Unconventional way.
→ harassment, non con receiving of nudes, asking for nudes, sending of nudes
You don't want to do this. Really, it's not ideal. It's rash, and impulsive and, oh, right, insanely fucking stupid.
But, you're a spiteful person at heart. And, well, this would be the perfect response...
So, you open the Task Force group chat, type up a message and press send before you can stop yourself.
CorvidCorporal: hey guys
CorvidCorporal: can I ask a favour?
You don't have to wait long for a reply.
Captain Price: What is it, Corporal?
Ghost: No
DontDropthe: you know where to find me 😉
Gazoline: everything okay?
You sigh, type up another message, worrying your lip between your teeth.
CorvidCorporal: it's nothing serious
CorvidCorporal: just... weird
Captain Price: What is it?
Gazoline: weird how?
You bury your face in your hands for a moment, considering if you're really about to do this. Your phone buzzes again, a notification from a different chat. You open it and holy shit, another one? Hell no. You're going through with this.
You head back to the Task Force group chat.
DontDropthe: weird is my specialty
You can't believe you're doing this.
You type and retype the message a couple of times before eventually just pressing send. You shut your phone off, face burning, not wanting to think about what you just did.
CorvidCorporal: I need a dick pic
The little markers on the bottom of the screen indicating people are typing vanish then start up again. Vanish. Start up again. Vanish.
Oh, you're fucked.
What the hell were you thinking?! These were your coworkers! Your superiors! Your boss!
You scramble to explain yourself.
CorvidCorporal: forget I said anything!
CorvidCorporal: it's just this guy keeps sending me them unsolicited from different accounts because I keep blocking his ass
CorvidCorporal: I figured the best way to get him to stop would be to send one back
CorvidCorporal: you know a real power move
CorvidCorporal: just really blindside em
CorvidCorporal: but well... I lack the parts and if I were just to go to google the guy could easily figure that shit out
CorvidCorporal: it was stupid and impulsive and I'm so sorry I asked
CorvidCorporal: please don't fire me I need this job
CorvidCorporal: guys?
The entire chat is dead. But their icons show that each and everyone of them is still active. Even Ghost.
You curse yourself internally and knock your head against the wall. You shut your phone off and toss it away. Too overwhelming. Too much. You can't... Why did you do that?!
You sit on the foot of your bunk and mourn your career, face in your hands. Dishonorable discharge no doubt in your future... You're such an idiot!
Your phone buzzes from across the room. You ignore it.
Except it buzzes again. And again. And again. And–
By the seventh text tone you go to pick it up, almost feeling sick from the nasty knot of anxiety and dread in your gut.
You open the group chat.
You close the group chat.
Holy shit.
DontDropthe: see attachment
DontDropthe: see attachment
DontDropthe: see attachment
Gazoline: jesus christ soap
Gazoline: see (2) attachments
DontDropthe: see (3) attachments
Fif– sixteen pictures. Two from Gaz and fourteen from Soap.
Holy shit.
Your phone goes off again.
Captain Price: Let me know if you need anything else, Corporal
Captain Price: see (3) attachments
What the fuck?
Soap has moved on to sending you pictures directly. You dismiss a call from him in a blind panic. He immediately sends a video.
You type into the group chat with shaking hands.
CorvidCorporal: thanks
Gazoline: anytime
DontDropthe: it's only fair if you send them back
DontDropthe: i understand if your shy
DontDropthe: my doors unlocked
Captain Price: *you're
In the end, you got more than enough material to choose from.
Three from Price. Seven from Gaz. A whopping twenty nine from Soap.
You're still deciding on what picture to send (and on calming your racing heart and ignoring the growing heat between your thighs) when your phone goes off again.
Ghost: see attachment
Please reblog to support my writing!
Comment to motivate!
masterlist!
#call of duty#cod mwii#cod#john price#x reader#john soap mactavish#soap x reader#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#captain price#price x reader#captain price x reader#simon ghost riley#ghost#ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#soap#gaz#task force 141#task force 141 x reader#poly 141
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JUST LIKE HER.
warnings: incest (father/daughter), James being disgusting, james comparing you and Mary 😭, non-con to dub-con, and getting turned on by yelling.
this is dead dove/dark content. if are uncomfortable with this kind of content or don't like it, then do not interact.
a/n : this lowkey sucks to me
Being with your dad wasn't so bad. He supports you, cares for you, lets you drive his car sometimes, and decided it was okay for you to live with him still. Unless you find a nice spot. But there's one thing.
He's really, really, really, really, a serious loser. I mean come on…he's kinda pathetic. Sad to say it but it's true, your dad isn't always the best of the best. He can be lazy and dumb. Sometimes really touchy with you as well….but that's for another time. Whenever he sees you, cleaning, cooking, or whatever that reminds him of Mary in the slightest.
He'd go insane and go on long stories about her, of course he never told you what really happened…you'd hate him with all your guts and heart. He even feels pathetic for mistaking you for her once.
“Dad, it's been years. I thought you'd let go of it now.” You sighed as you grabbed the tiny towel to dry off a dish.
“I know, sweetie but it's just-....you look like her sometimes and that makes me freak out..” He looked away from you, what kind of father does that? Gets excited over almost seeing his dead wife but in reality it's just his daughter.
Honestly, when did you get so big? When you were a kid, you looked a lot more like him. Exactly like your dad, people would mistake you for a boy sometimes.
He was staring at you, long and good…just looking. ‘Would she feel just like Mary?’ He let his thoughts take over. What the fuck.
He cringed internally and put his head in his hands. He can't. He knows he shouldn't…but fuck. He saw all the bits of Mary…Mary…and himself. Mostly his genes but you were a perfect mix. The tits and ass…god he just wanted to grab them and compare them but that'd already make him more of a loser than he is.
Being miserable and wanting to fuck his own daughter? Really trying to make himself look bad at this point. But what could be the harm? Only once. He hid Mary's death for a bit…He can hide this too.
“What are you doing?” Scoffing at him as he puts his hands on your hips, Trying to swat them away.
“You look like her, y’know..?” He said in the softest and sad voice he had.
Pathetic ass loser trying to seduce his daughter. Barf.
“Okay…and?...” You tried to turn your head to look at him. He stared at you with a certain look you've seen before. The look you saw customers give you at work. “Let's fuck” look. He tried slipping his cold hands underneath your sweater, making you flinch and push him away.
“Hey! What the hell is wrong with you?” Your brows furrow and look disgusted with him. You should be disgusted because he deserves it.
“Honey, I'm so sorry…I don't know what came over me….” He sighed. He knew exactly what came over him but sadly it didn't work.
So plan B. Fuck her while she's sleeping. Not his proudest moments but hey, he's had worse moments. So during the night, while you're all tucked in and fast asleep. He comes in like the boogeyman at night and boom.
He can't wait another minute, feeling up your tits and kissing you…Okay, so it doesn't really taste like her but it's sweeter and softer.
After minutes of kissing you and feeling up your tits, you get up and slap him quickly “God, what the fuck is wrong with you? I can't even sleep anymore? Fuck…you're so gross, I can't believe mom delt with you.” You basically yelled at him and wow, that's what got him hard.
Whiskey Dick the whole time he was touching you but the yelling is what got him turned on. Fucking freak.
You couldn't do much, he's stronger and older, you had to give in and just let it happen. He has a big dick though…a real nice pale, veiny, pink tip dick. Pushing it deeper and deeper into you as he let go of strained groans.
“I'm sorry…. I'm- fuck I'm sorry baby but…I couldn't stop…” He breathed out into your neck, he got red pretty easily. his pretty neck is all red and his dick of course just absolutely throbbing against your soft walls. Making you cry out in pleasure and pain.
“Dad!...Oh God…ahah…please rub my clit…” you whined to him and he instantly listened. It's so cute. the perfect pussy, chubby, tight, and wet. After what seemed like hours, he finally came all in you. His jaw clenching, eyes closed, and hands stuck to your hips while he tried so hard to not moan ‘Mary’. No condom or anything. He wasn't capable of waiting for something like that. He felt guilty. Looking at your tired and exhausted expression.
“Baby…My baby…I'm so sorry for that..” He sighed out, leaning his head down to your shoulder and letting it rest there as you just patted his back. “S’okay, dad…” you slurred out, cock drunk.
At least he got some pussy finally.
#james sunderland smut#james sunderland x reader#james sunderland#silent hill 2 remake#silent hill#silent hill 2#dad!james sunderland#tw.incest
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can i just say something? at this party here there are maybe 40 of the most important people in america and you have just walked all around, all evening, telling them all that i'm gonna get fired. no, it was implied, lightly, as a little... god! part of a tactical kind of joke. will you explain to me, the joke? because i don't get the fucking joke. MY GOD, TOM! i don't get the joke, i don't get the joke. it was something that he said, that isn't true, that we needed to say. but you stood by his side, and he said it, and you were like "okay, well, that sounds good to me." fuck's sake, i'm not doing this right now. you know i'm in serious trouble, that was a play. you will be okay because you are a tough fucking bitch who will always survive because you do what you need, you will do what — are you even listening? i will be okay? — you will do whatever you need. yeah? really? yeah, you sure you're not projecting, because that is actually you. should we have a real conversation? with a scorpion? no. that was a friendly thing. that was a friendly thing. yeah. sure. real friendly. yeah, no, i'm a scorpion, you're a hyena, you're a... you're a street rat. actually, no, you're a fucking snake. "here's a dead snake to wear as a necktie, tom", "why aren't you laughing?" (pause) i wonder if we shouldn't clear the air. yeah? yeah. sure. i think you can be a very selfish person and i think you find it very hard to think about me — what the fuck? — and i think you shouldn't have even married me, actually. what the fuck? what the ACTUAL fuck? you proposed to me. you proposed at my lowest fucking ebb. my dad was dying, what was i supposed to say? perhaps "no"? i didn't want to hurt your feelings. thanks! thanks for that! yeah, you really kept me safe while you ran off to fuck the phone book. fuck off. you're hick — and then, and then.. — conservative hick — you hid it, you hid it because you were so scared of how fucking awful you are. you were only with me to get to power. you got it now, tom, you've got it! I'M WITH YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! bullshit, you're fucking me for my DNA, you were fucking me for a fucking ladder because your whole family is striving and parochial. that's not... thats not a fair characterization. no? well, your mom loves me more than she loves you, because she's cracked. you want to... you want to actually clear the air? fine. you betrayed me. YOU WERE GOING TO SEE ME SENT TO FUCKING PRISON, SHIV! AND THEN YOU FOBBED ME OFF WITH THAT FUCKING UNDRINKABLE WINE AND YOU WON'T HAVE MY BABY BECAUSE YOU NEVER EVEN THOUGHT, HONESTLY, THAT YOUD BE WITH ME MORE THAN FOUR FUCKING YEARS, I DON'T THINK! YOU OFFERED TO GO TO JAIL! YOU OFFERED TO GO TO JAIL BECAUSE YOU'RE SERVILE! you're just... YOU'RE SERVILE! YOU ARE INCAPABLE OF THINKING ABOUT ANYBODY OTHER THAN YOURSELF BECAUSE YOUR SENSE OF WHO YOU ARE, SHIV, IS THAT FUCKING THIN! oh yeah you read that in a book, tom? YOU'RE TOO FUCKING TRANSPARENT TO FIND THAT IN A BOOK! you're pathetic, you're pathetic. youre a masochist and you can't even take it. i think you are incapable of love, and i think you are maybe not a good person to have children! well, that's not very nice to say, is it? i'm sorry. i'm sorry, but you... you... you have hurt me more than you can possibly imagine. and you, you took away the last six months i could've had with my dad. no. yes. no! yes. you sucked up to him and you cut me out! it's not my fault that you didn't get his approval. i have given you endless approval and it doesn't fill you up because you're broken. i don't like you. i don't... i don't even care about you. i don't care. have we cleared the air, huh? feel good now? yeah. yeah. fucking great. tip top. you don't deserve me, and you never did. and everything came out of that. so fucking flat.
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