#be respectful of his mental health and his very personal decision to not be actively involved in the band

[emometalhead]

Hi FOB fans! Reminder to be respectful of Joe stepping away from the band. Though his presence will be missed during the time he's gone, remember not to be angry toward him or the band for this decision! Joe being healthy is much more important than him making band appearances. We all need to be welcoming to whomever is filling his shoes during performances, and supportive of the decision Joe made for his health. I wish him nothing but the best.

[multidimensionalguidance]

How will the upcoming Eclipses affect you?

Note: this will be focused on Vedic astrology, so please be respectful if you don't agree nor care.

On March 24, 2024 there will be an Penumbral Lunar Eclipse forming from 9:53pm-2:32am PT, followed by a Total Solar Eclipse on April 8, 2024 at 8:42am-1:52pm PT.

As the ancient Indian legend goes, an eclipse occurs when the shadowy demon Rahu Ketu gets his revenge on the Sun and the Moon by consuming them and stealing their luminous rays. Their pure, creative energy gets twisted and dark during the eclipse and for a few days after. This myth does not exactly conjure a heart warming mental image, and that’s intentional.

According to Vedic Astrology, is that eclipses can be a really bad time to start or make key decisions about projects, relationships, jobs, or any other important thing in the material world.

Do not, on the day of an eclipse or the few days after it, start an important new project, sign a contract, make a deal, or any other material activity if you have another option.

On the other hand, eclipses are a great time to stay in, meditate, and do your inner work. In fact, they provide an especially rich opportunity to connect with spirit because the ‘veils’ are thin.

The Lunar Eclipse will happen in the Virgo-Pisces axis, while the the Solar Eclipse will occur in Pisces. There will be a heavy focus on decluttering our day to day habits which are all deeply related to our spiritual practices and hygiene. Imagine that a huge storm comes through to transform the way you work, your health habits, organization skills, and show you how all of them are deeply connected to our subconscious mind. It comes to show us how most of our day to limitations come from within, and how endings are actually a divine blessing.

Depending on what house the Lunar or Solar eclipse will be transiting in our chart, it will tell us where to expect this transformations, karmic balance, and overall readjustments.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here's how the Lunar Eclipse (full moon) or Solar Eclipse (new moon) will affect your chart:

1st/7th House Axis: there will be major changes to how you relate to yourself and others. The way that your personality, physical self, and approach to life has been currently functioning when it comes to relationships, business partners, and way of interacting with others overall will be highlighted for good, bad, or both. If you're a Pisces ASC, there will be a focus and major transformations within your close relationships. If there's anyone that you've been holding onto despite knowing how toxic it is, then you will see it faltering away by the end of April. If there's anyone who has been actively holding negative intentions or sending evil eye your way, it will become obvious, which will then lead you to severing it for good. Now, for Virgo ASC, you will notice major changes to your physical health depending of course on how you've been taking care of yourself. As well on your daily routine, work, and other related themes. There will be an event that will occur that will somehow change the way you've perceived life or yourself, and that will become the trigger to a meaningful change in your personality or attitude.

This eclipse will wash away like a sea storm anything that has been holding back both these signs from greatness, or will make them pay back some pending karma if they've been neglecting themselves or spiritual path. The eye of the storm is on YOU. There will be nowhere to run to anymore. You will face yourself, accept it gracefully, and evolve into the version that has been calling out within for very long.

If you've already been working on your inner and outer self, then no worries! This energy will simply push out of your way anything that has been blocking your blessings.

2nd/8th House Axis: there will be major changes to the way you've used money and resources to achieve longevity, to heal, towards your food habits, and long term financial security. Some major event will make you realize that perhaps you haven't been utilizing it in the best way possible. There might a sudden debt or losses coming your way if you've been ignoring your finances, or on the other hand, there might be a sudden gain of money that happens without you expecting it at all. Overall, it is suggested to not make any major financial decisions and to instead sit down and focus on organizing your finances. Think about those expenses that you don't actually need and that are affecting or accumulating long term. The ones that could be keeping you from achieving long term financial security. Make introspection your focus, and regardless of what comes your way, you will be able to handle it.

3rd/9th House Axis: this is more of a mental and spiritual focus, which is very good actually. You will see changes occuring in the way you've been communicating with yourself and others. The way you've been socializing with siblings, neighbors, and those within your near vicinity. All of this has been affecting how your mental and physical horizons have expanded so far. Your inner world has always been related to your philosophy, education, interactions with those that come from a different cultural background, and your ethics as well. There might sudden events that occur that will transform the way you've been dealing with those matters. Perhaps your relationship with your siblings is not good, but now one of them needs urgent help, and you're put in a situation where your aid helps mending the situation or making you realize why the distancing must continue. Another way could be, how you've been resisting developing academically to a higher level, and now a job requires you go back to learning something. It could also be unexpected traveling or changing from one religion to another (or to believing in none).

4th/10th House Axis: the changes that will occur will be related to how your home environment, family, inner world, mother wounds, or foundations have been affecting your career, reputation, public image, and fame. A situation might occur that changes the way you've perceived both of these matters. Perhaps you've been limited by a tumultuous home situation for a while, and that has kept you from reaching your peak career level, which would then be transformed so you can finally have access to it. It could also be that you've been hyper focusing so much on work that you've been neglecting building a stable home where you can feel safe, secure, and develop your inner world further, which would then imply something happening at work that forces you to face it. Overall, you will find peace among the storm when you decide to sit down and meditate on inner limitations that have been keeping you from reaching your material goals. Do you shy away from the public? Do you hate being perceived? Or Do you love being the center of attention too much? Are you always trying to appeal to the public even when you feel differently within?

Also, this might not occur to everyone, but I sense that those who might be doing corrupt dealings in at work or home will be suddenly exposed for everyone to see. An abusive parent that no one knows about because he keeps a pretty reputation? Everyone in the family and outside will see their true colors. A boss/celebrity/senator that’s using their power to abuse those under their leadership? Public embarrassment as everyone will be seeing their “dirty laundry” and there’s a possibility of them losing said position due to it.

5th/11th House Axis: these changes will be surrounded by the way your romantic pursuits, self expression, creativity, and children (if there are any) affect your goals, long term vision, friends, social network, online persona, wishes, and desires of the future. A situation might occur where a recent crush or someone you’re casually dating (not necessarily formal) exposes something about themselves or you that changes your perception of what you want for the future. It could also be them doing something that affects your reputation online for good or bad. There could also be something like a hobby or creative pursuit bringing you a secure income or popping up on social media. For some others, it could also be adjusting the way they express themselves with their future goals/wishes/desires.

This might not be for majority, but there might be some who find out they are pregnant, and that will of course, put them in a situation of having to re-evaluate their future. If there’s already children in the play, then there might be something that gets revealed about them as well.

Overall, I would suggest to sit down and meditate on the ways that you’ve allowed your inner expression to align with your goals. Are you holding back your gifts and not expressing them online out of fear? Are you overly focusing on material goals so much that you are getting disconnected from your inner child? Are you connecting to the things that bring you joy and align with your goals?

6th/12th House Axis: in here the changes or revelations will have your day to day work, routine, health, and service given to others put into contrast with how you maintain your spirituality, karma, and subconscious beliefs. There might be situations that occur at work that will shake you enough to drive you into isolation and healing. So there’s the possibility of losing your job, only to realize that if you wouldn’t have then a better one was not going to arrive. It could also be something within your spirituality coming to the front and pushing you towards changing your day to day routine, like adding yoga/meditation/journaling. For some others, it could be health conditions that were ignored coming up, and needing to be dealt with wether you like it or not.

I would suggest prioritizing your mental and physical health A LOT during this time, although it won’t be optional. Focus on those aspects and you’ll get positive results by the time eclipse season ends. Just make sure you don’t resist or fight them, as it would only get worst.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hope this is useful and informative reading! Please do not be afraid of these Eclipses, they often come with necessary changes that will help us be aligned to our best version.

From my previous experience, I had one occur during my birthday, it was super heavy and honestly the worst one I had. But, I was able to release all the frustrations I had dwelling inside, and literally the next day, had an AMAZING experience. Few months later, four to be specific, I was able to meet my current partner. Mind you, after dealing with a situationship a month after said birthday that left me shook, but was very much needed. Everything I had asked for during the Eclipse came to me, but in a really wonky way, hence why its best to NOT manifest during an Eclipse (if you like chaotic energy though, go right ahead).

[9800sblog]

hongjoong tarot reading

public persona vs real personality

do i have his energy permission to do and share this reading? page of pentacles

fun fact, this my mom's bias!

I didn't write down the cards because I usually get too many in this type of reading as there are many questions being made. but nothing here is difficult to notice in real life and I'm not exposing any secrets, so just trust me bros 🤥

persona

hongjoong is seen as a leader, he wants to be seen as compassionate and friendly, but firm, he wants others to know that there are consequences and he should be feared if need be (this includes everyone, like how he calls out fans if they mess up bad). he tries to look fun, entertaining, of course, and he really tries to become friends with those involving his work, although he has strong boundaries and limits, if necessary. he doesn't let people walk over anyone, and he's the type to follow strict rules and activities but only with ease, but only if he agrees with them. hongjoong thinks it's important to show happiness and contentment on camera no matter what. his job is to fulfill a fantasy, so the way he acts depends a lot on what's the job - photoshoot, stage, live, vlog, etc. in general, he wants to bring happiness and escape to others, he really dives into the idea of ateez being a family. he also shows a lot of respect to traditions and social hierarchies, he often asks advice and listens attentively to his seniors, and is extra polite around different types of people (reminded of him asking permission to touch a fan's face when ateez was doing their makeup). hongjoong's fanservice is nothing unusual, it's easy to understand and identify (at least that's what he thinks), overall he acts like he is impulsive and all fans are incredibly attractive to him, he acts as if he's genuinely got a crush on people (he's a good actor) and he thinks it's part of a game everyone agreed to play, hongjoong might think his fans are very down to earth and realistic, and everyone knows when he's not being genuine (he is wrong), he does think fans lack boundaries and rules and he tries to put them in their place when he can and sees wrong. hongjoong sees fans from a distance, however, he may gloss over social media every once in a while to figure out fan's tendencies but may think looking often is bad for his mental health, even with those fans that have the best intentions (seeing people that don't know him talk about him all the time is bad for his self image, no matter if they're talking good or bad, as it's disconnected from reality either way).

of all members I've read, hongjoong is the most calm when it comes to fan's idea of him, I mean he is mostly known for social fights and his artistic view (very different from seonghwa, who is seen as a woman, literally, and mingi who is seen as a sex icon, those are more harmful to one's mental well-being and the readins reflected that)

personality

work is a HUGE part of hongjoong's personal life, his friends are co-workers, he relaxes by working, he has fun by working, this guy is a fucking workaholic. hongjoong may find some relief in letting other's guide for once, not making decisions or being democratic. his love language may be acts of service and quality time, as he may enjoy doing things/chores when spending time with friends, specially creative ones and mindful discussions. he may act as a sort of therapist for other members and friends hehe for relaxing, he may enjoy spending time with friends and family, anywhere as long as they're together, he gets to get out of his head a bit, his family is his safe space. and likes to think about life in a "glass half full" type of way, to not be overwhelmed by the negativity that all and any things in life can bring, hongjoong likes to focus on the brighter side and what he can do to change the bad side. he enjoys art as well, it's undoubtedly a hobby of his, we don't need tarot to say this haha. hongjoong may enjoy being around children and animals, parks, water spots (rivers, beaches, bridges, etc) or any family related stuff, he may find a type of bliss and see a type of innocence and beauty there that he doesn't anywhere else. hongjoong loves his job a lot, so that's what he does to have fun too kkkkkk he often enjoys being with his members and maybe the trainees in his company, he loves to play games but I think specially mobile games cause you can bring them anywhere. hongjoong loves to study about different aspects of his job, to learn different things about the world outside of seoul and/or korea, he may also be a very spiritual or religious person in privacy as I got some cards related to that. he may have a specific set of moral rules and standards that he likes to follow, believe in and study about. when totally alone, hongjoong feels he can finally be his truest self, his most genuine and raw version, it feels liberating in a way. he does a lot for others in daily life. although he enjoys it, it's nice to have time to look after his own well-being and stability. he's mostly focused on his inner child, making him feel safe and fulfilled. he doesn't care a lot about being alone, definitely not an introvert or a neurodivergent so if you heard any rumors about that 🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️ kkkkkkk just joking, I'm being silly 😛😝 but seriously, he doesn't seem to care about being alone, it's nice for a change, he's not the type to be scared of his own thoughts either, he'd just rather be with others because it's fun. when he's alone he may just distract himself, and do whatever there is to do or watch tv, talk to himself. he may like to use alone time to think about himself as an individual too, to try to separate his feelings from others' and, again, may be a bit spiritual!

this is the most stable and calm member I've read, the most consistent energy throughout the entire reading and very comforting in the private section, specially towards the end.

[poemsforparker]

ticket to ride - arvin russel | 18+ oneshot

(not my gif)

“I think I’m gonna be sad

I think is today, yeah

The girl that’s driving me mad

Is goin’ away”

pairing: arvin russel x f!reader

summary: there’s nothing holding you in this city.

content warning: 18+, smut right bellow the cut, unprotected sex, angst, bad words, mentions of suicide, mentions of murder, toxic relationship, movie spoilers.

a.n: first Arvin fic! (rewatching this movie really woke something in me). dark fics aren’t really my thing but Arvin Russel is not exactly a role model of mental health so I think this fits best.

song inspiration

Arvin’s breath was totally pathless, his dick pumping hard into you while his grip on your waist got stronger every second, like he was trying to get you impossibly close to his body. If someone could see his car from the outside, the weird way it was moving could definitely denounce the activities in the back seat.

"I'm so close, baby. You're taking my cock so well." Arvin says breathlessly on your ears, knowing exactly how to get you worked up. He needs no verbal answer that it had an effect in you when feels you tight around him right after his words. "That's right, honey. Keep going like that. Shit, I love you so much."

"I love you." You kiss him deeply like life depends on it and feel the knot on your stomach getting harder to hold, finally releasing on his dick. Letting your body rest on his.

"Come with me." You say after a long moment of silence, touching the subject you both been avoiding, feeling like the air around you was unbearably heavy holding this question in. You move your body up to get him out of you and sitting by his side, still waiting for an answer, that came after a heavy sigh from the boy.

"You know I can't, baby. Not after Lenora, I can't leave my family, not now that they need me the most." You sigh. He was right, you did know that, it has been like that for months now. You had your mind made that you were leaving, then it came to going say your goodbyes to Arvin, you give it to temptation, you both end up in bed or the back of his car.

You wanted to leave this town, more than anything, this place felt like poison, taking away all your hopes to forget the past and move on with Arvin. Like living here costed all your rights to be happy, or free. What you wished that was different, was the cost that such decision had implied to you. Arvin had people who needed him, he had a family. All you had was him.

Flashbacks come to you, at high school Arvin protected you quite literally with his own damn life. Threatening anyone who dared to touch a finger his girl to loose that very finger, or they ugly damn heads. At the time, you made plans with him to run away together when you grew up. Back then, it would just be another case of kids who ran away to try life on a near town, you’d come back to visit, send letters after settled wherever. It was the perfect plan to live a perfect life.

But perfect things do not exist.

It all started to go to shit (even more) when Teagardin showed up in town. You had a bad feeling about him since the start. Lenora, in her place, she had faith in people, specially if that person was the reverend, dear lord, why would she suspect they meant any harm?

But she should.

The man had the worst of the intentions. Of course, as a figure of respect in the city, who would be crazy enough to question anything that he said or did? But again, they should’ve.

After Arvin lost her, you were fundamental for him not to break down, although you were close to an attack yourself, you knew Arvin would need all support he could get, so you provided him that. You stopped him from crossing the line when he couldn't hold it together, but now, you now selfishly wished you didn’t.

If you had killed the bastard he’d have no choice but to run away with you.

“Let’s do it,” you say to him, hovering over his warm body again “let’s put a bullet in that motherfucker’s head and then we get the hell out of here.” you grin at him facing an expression on Arvin’s face that for the first time on years you couldn’t read. “C’mon, Arvin, you almost did it before.”

“Yeah... Almost, but you yourself talked me out of it. What changed?” you chuckle, rolling your eyes.

“Everything.” you kiss his jaw and cup his face to stare him deep in the eyes. “If you’re stuck here, honey, so am I. If you say no, that’s fine, I’ll stay here, with you, as much as try my fucking best I can’t go without you.” you fix yourself to sit comfortably on his lap and continue. “But if you say yes,” you start kissing down his neck between words “we get our justice and get the fuck out, just me and you, baby,” you peck his lips “what do you say?”

You can see Arvin put up a fight with himself behind his eyes, trying to still find some moral left on his brain, deep down, he knew the only thing holding him back from doing justice with his own hands was the fear he had of letting you down, now, seeing you like this, Arvin couldn’t find a single crumble of a reason not to, the offer was too inviting.

“I say I’m with you to the end...let’s do this.” You grin proudly at your boyfriend and kiss him with passion, knowing once in for all once your plan was complete you would never step on these cursed grounds ever again.

[femmefatalevibe]

how do you reconcile being a feminist, single, and a high-value woman? maybe I'm misunderstanding the concept but I always thought HVW and hypergamy were all very centered on seeking a male partner.

Hi love! Great question. I think your curiosity offers a great opportunity to dive a bit more into my personal views and philosophy.

I believe that the goal of feminism is to protect all women and provide them legal protection, structural resources, and social power to live equitably in society. In my eyes, a high-value woman is one who is unapologetically self-respecting and sets her life up in a way to allows her to work towards goals that meet her needs in all areas of life.

Hypergamy, by its modern definition, is the idea that women "date up" to intertwine their sexual relationships with men to those who offer more or equally high social, financial, or sexual capital to them. The traditional idea of hypergamy was exclusively referred to as "marrying up" as marriage was the only way women could achieve most resources (like a bank account, credit card, housing, and certain medical care – it's so terrifying, honestly).

In the latter case, hypergamy is nearly synonymous with centralizing men. Before women gained certain freedoms (in the U.S. this was mostly in the 1960-70s), centralizing men was a survival mechanism, not a preference or act of self-imposed oppression.

I believe in the modern world where women can have their own bank accounts, careers, and access to birth control (the latter one is an anxiety-inducing topic at this point in time, ugh), women are given the choice to be hypergamous either while centralizing or decentralizing men.

I believe that you can uphold hypergamous standards in your dating life without centralizing men in your life. For me, personally, my relationship or dating status has no bearing on how happy or successful I am in my life. No man (or lack of one in my life) will ever determine my self-worth or reflect my progress in life. My metrics of fulfillment and accomplishment stem from thriving in my professional life, staying in good health, practicing consistently healthy habits (WFPB diet, regular exercise, mental health hygiene, sexual wellness, mindfulness, self-care, etc.), and maintaining nourishing friendships. Dating and my interactions with men (in non-platonic ways) are fun ways I enrich my life, so I believe this mentality embodies the modern – albeit hyper-progressive – definition of hypergamy. Remaining single allows me to enjoy all of the ways men can uplevel my life – socially, financially (to the degree some nighttime activities, such as dinners, drinks, car services, club fees, etc. are paid for – no sugaring activities or anything), and sexually without the aspects of dating men that would contradict my sense of self-respect or autonomy. I'm not personally designed to be a man's therapist or feel like I should have to include a man's needs in all of my life or day-to-day decisions because we're sexually involved with each other. I have a strict vetting process regarding who I will entertain in my dating/sexual life to ensure they're adding value to my life and there's mutual compatibility considering the type of arrangement we're both seeking.

Personally, I believe the only way to maintain equity in dating is to remain single, which allows me to meet all of my other standards in life. I will never sacrifice my life goals for a man, but I do not believe that means you have to approach dating or sexual relationships from a black-and-white perspective. However, if I'm going to date men (which can be a headache for certain), I believe they need to enrich my life in some way – whether that's interesting conversations, gaining business acumen, social relationships, fun sexual experiences, or just learning about different cultures/world perspectives.

From my observations, women who use hypergamy as an excuse to centralize their life or aspirations around a man are glamorizing regressive/oppressive ideologies (like submitting to a partner or relying on men financially) as a last attempt to uphold the patriarchy as women wake up to the fact that having to do all of society's emotional labor plus having to contort ourselves in a world designed for men, namely in our professional lives, is not the truest form of feminism out there (not to mention it's lack of intersectionality, but that's a whole other rant lol). I don't use the "hypergamy" tag on my posts anymore for this reason, though. I believe that many people are conflating the textbook concept of hypergamy with regressive political agendas, which I will never promote let alone subscribe to.

This is all just my take, so I hope it all makes sense and resonates with some members of this amazing community. Every woman should figure out what approaches to all of these matters would make her the most genuinely happy and fulfilled regardless of society's expectations or cultural norms.

Sending love xx

[shirogane-oushirou]

edit: i decided this would drive me nuts, but i still want to keep it in case there's something worth salvaging in the future. ignore all of this ^_^

for some reason i'm interested the idea of poke!ren beginning our friendship with that like... unintentional infantilization a lot of people do with disabled people when they're trying not to be actively ableist? not because i enjoy that LMAO ABSOLUTELY NOT -- and my pokesona is prideful as hell and would DESPISE it -- but i think it would make sense.

[cw casual ableism, infantilism of disabled ppl. also, disclaimer: i'm basing some of this loosely on my own health issues so it may not 100% apply to all disabled people. just want to keep that straight LMAO.]

most many doctors are SUPREMELY ableist, but doc!ren went into his field SPECIFICALLY to help disabled people and so focused on how best to treat each individual person according to their personalities and disabilities. sure, poke!ren's also technically both a clinical doc and researcher, but if doc!ren is like 80% clinical 20% research, poke!ren is like 10% clinical 90% research.

so poke!ren... doesn't have that knowledge. he does mostly field work and some lab work, with the rare "what do you think about this specific medical case?" appointment. he's the kind of person who hates the more vocal brands of ableism, but is consistently overbearing with his treatment of disabled people in a way that's inadvertently exhausting to deal with because "what happens if i tell him this is also ableist? will he have a fit? will he get angry or upset? will he decide disabled people are too picky if i'm not the Perfect Disabled Little Meow Meow?" so you just end up suffering through it.

therefore, he goes full "paper skin, glass bones," with me, very, "oh i can get that for you! no don't stand up, i can do that. can i cook something for you? no no no, i mean, i know you COULD, but wouldn't it be /easier/ for me to make it for you? you might hurt yourself!". 🙄

we have an evening outing in another city. it gets dark, we're not at the point where we're comfortable staying at his place together, he offers to maybe help me find a hotel, and i say "nope i've got this!" and fly away home on a Fucking Lugia.

and then he has to sit with that and realize some things.

like the fact that he has no idea who the fuck i am beyond surface level. after all, i've been carrying a legendary bird around in my back pocket and he didn't know until now, months after we first met.

like the fact that i can take care of SOME things by myself with the right "tools" or pkmn. i SOMETIMES need help, but i don't ALWAYS need help, and if i DO need help i have the option to tell him myself.

like the fact that he simply saw me as Disabled. as though i didn't have a life before or outside of Disability. i was simply the pitiable, lonely, disabled vn nerd he talks about games with.

and then he has to relearn Me from square one, and it makes our relationship so much stronger. we're able to work on our perfect balance together and build the trust that HE won't take things over for ME when I'M capable of something, and that I will let HIM know when i need HIM to do something I can't do. he has to trust that i'll let him be more doting on the days when i'm having flare-ups, but simultaneously has to respect when there are things i still want to do myself even on those worst days.

.........idk. this is a lot of words to say "god i want to be taken care of, but in a way where the other person sees me as an adult with a personality and decision-making ability and a life that's deeply AFFECTED by disability in many ways but isn't JUST disability." yk?

tbch, after writing it all out, this maaaay end up as canon..... OR it might remain a theoretical offshoot depending on how comfy i am when the Mental Movies (tm) of us finding that trust come together. poke!ren's supposed to be like. PURE escapism, so something like this honestly might hit too close to home to feel good fdhfghfg. like at least he'd end up learning that balance, which is nice... but everything leading up to it? 😬 Maybe A Bit Too Painful....

(damn. verbose king over here, wrote all of this TWICE just to say "i might throw it out" lKNMADKJFNKJDNF)

[ao3gobi17]

I wonder what the plot would have been like if Paz had survived the gunshot but had lost her mind due to PTSD. She would either go to a mental health center or stay under the care of the Mccoskers and Spider, because she would not be able to function normally in society. I actually have two versions of this question:

1 - what if her persception of time stopped due to trauma and she still had the impression that Spider was 7 years old and she was in a relationship with Quaricth? (If you know PJO, it's based on May Castellan) How would Spider react if after the kidnapping she behaved as if she was still with Q and they were a happy family?

2. She would recognize Spider and the McCoskers but she wouldn't be fully aware of her surroundings, she would withdraw into herself when anyone other than them tried to talk to her, if you watched His Dark Materials something like Elaine Parry's behavior. Would Quaritcg kidnap her too? How would he treat her knowing that she was only a shadow of her former self? If Spider was very possessive and protective of her, would he try to separate them somehow to have a chance to renew contact with him? (In this version she wouldn't recognize Quaritch as her former love)

(Follow up question to the above ^^) "To the question of what if Paz survived and lost her mind, in this version they would of course be kidnapped in a different way than in the original Custody, they would just be tracked down and captured instead of Leo's abduction."

Okay, so I really want someone to write a fic/drabble of number 1 because that's such an interesting concept - the idea that Spider is trying to protect her and get them out of there and she is genuinely unaware and is probably more comfortable and happy than she's been before Q showed up... add to that the amount of manipulation open to Quaritch and the dynamic of her believing Spider is 7 (which in some respects, Q may be very happy to play along with)... I am so down to read that, please write it aha.

But to answer the two questions...

Spider would struggle. I think he would have pretty much become his mom's carer (maybe the McCoskers would have hired someone for part of the time so he could go to school) and he would be hugely protective of her. I'm not sure in your scenario if Q actually is the would-be-killer... I could see that being a very interesting, very dark dynamic... like say she tries to leave him, he tries to kill her, he gets jailed, her injuries now make her want to stay with him, and Spider is well aware of all this. She's going to be actively helping Quaritch, Spider is going to loathe him, but be so helpless because he needs to care for his mom, Paz will inadvertently be indulging Q in the daydream of getting that time back with Spider as she's talking to him like a young child.. so Q will probably be more infantilising than he is in Custody... the whole plot would change to Spider's critical decision being whether to abandon her and try to escape himself, or somehow find a way to get her to go on the run with him. Either way, I am fascinated by the concept.

2. Spider would also struggle here, whether his mom was left behind or taken with him. Quaritch would probably take her? Like on the basis that he should be the one caring for her and it's his responsibility as her husband and he loves the person she was? And he'd probably get the recoms to help, but would step up and be that carer. (Although, if he was the one who actually tried to kill her in your scenario then maybe not, the scenario in option 1 was more him taking advantage of a 'lucky' turn of events if he was the 'killer'. In this version, if he tried to kill her then essentially he's already succeeded, so she'd be dead to him, and not worth interacting with.)

I feel like this would be slightly easier on Spider if Paz didn't know what was going on around her - though I think all the concerns about her getting proper care would still be there (whether she was with him and Q or back home). I don't think Quaritch would particularly need to separate Spider to speak to him, but he would be able to use separation as a potential punishment if he had Paz, which might encourage good behaviour from Spider. <3

[thesingingrevolution]

the way winwin carefully scheduled his year around the wayv comeback but sm suddenly switched the comeback dates up on him and he ended up not being able to participate ... and THEN he cant make it to the versache event cus he has to talk all of this out w the company.

yunquis r so strong... i would not be able to deal fr. how do u do it???

first of all thanks for your message 🙇🏻‍♀️💌

personally, i felt so upset and disappointed when the news broke :( it was bad enough it was gonna be an ot5 comeback, but when it was revealed it was because sm changed their pre planned schedule it made me angry. i understand that winwin has other important activities and if it was his own choice to sit this one out, i would have respected his decision and happily supported the other five members. but the fact that he went out of his way to ensure his schedule would align and they couldn’t even respect that.. it made me really sad. as far as we know, there is no reason this comeback had to me moved up. they just did it. and i’ve never seen anything like it, how can a company not respect their artist in this incredibly basic way? it’s heartbreaking.

i wish winwin stays in nct because i truly love him and i love his friendships in the group and his contributions etc etc but stuff like this makes me wish more and more than he only does what he needs to do for his career and happiness, regardless of how we feel. these transgressions are too serious in my opinion, to the point that when wayv were promoting on my youth during the last few months of 2023 as a proper group it almost felt like a fever dream. a full group promoting a comeback together should not be a rare occurrence. it’s so so so sad and wayv as a whole deserve so much better. the fact that i felt absolutely no excitement over this cb and haven’t even looked at concept pics or listened to any songs says so much. i will eventually, but it hurts right now :( i will need some time to get over this. not the fault of any of the members, of course!!! will always love and wish then the best.

moreover i hate that this feeds into the idea that winwin doesn’t care about his group. it’s such a common sentiment in the (toxic/misinformed/immature) parts of the fandom. if anything, winwin’s actions and deliberate desire to partake in the cb tells us the EXACT OPPOSITE. if he didn’t care, he clearly wouldn’t have gone through the trouble. like you’ve said, it’s causing more issues for him. so why would he do it if he didn’t care? i’m glad some clarifying posts went semi viral, and there was a decent amount of outrage. rightfully so.

as for how i do it….. my friend,, it’s not easy. to be honest, i have had periods where it wasn’t good for me (last summer, for example, i had so much free time to dedicate to kpop and it started affecting my mental health when i saw my fav neglected and disrespected all the time). thankfully i am better now and have been for a long time, it’s really embarrassing to admit kpop can mess one up like that lol but i hope people can be honest about how they feel since it’s very real in my experience. i try not too think about it too much and keep busy with other things, i took a huge step back from stan twitter and i only follow a few yunqi accs who post updates/positivity and don’t engage in fanwars and spread aggression across the internet. as for his company, it’s a bit more complicated. i feel as though his potential has never been fully realized, which is sad for a seasoned idol so many years into his career. but it also gives him so much space to grow, every now and then i am so surprised by his incredible work in other areas, because he was held back so much. i am so glad there are people who recognize his potential <3

i also try to remember that even though i love nct and its a huge part of my life, it’s just music and no matter what happens things will be alright. we will always have the good times and memories and that makes me feel better when i get upset. lastly, i learned to primarily focus on my own friends and my own thoughts. just last night, i told a friend i love winwin the most and she said she likes him and that he suits me as a bias. all my irl kpop stan friends have been nothing but supportive and sweet. and in my own head, winwin is the best, i dont have to think about his company and random people online to hold that opinion, and at the end of the day my thoughts are the only ones that really matter when it comes to this.

i’m sorry this is so long hahahha, but hopefully it explains a little about how i feel about all this!! once again thank you for your message 💖

[ask-ursa-tonypeter]

[fic: double-blind] Since Extremis stayed in Tony's body for years, is it possible that Tony's body/brain is somewhat changed, and that he could "relapse" into SIM Tony? If so, have Tony and Peter considered how to account for that? Will Tony have to take continuous doses of anti-Extremis, or is Extremis truly gone for good? (I'm just drawing loose parallels to handwavey neurochemistry, esp with how one can't just take a single dose of antidepressant, and if they want to stop using said antidepressant, they have to wean themself off to avoid a mental health crash. But of course, that might not be the logic in your AU.)

[[this is more of a meta question so 🐻ursa interlude🐻

So I did think a lot about how spending ~handwave number of years in one frame of mind would affect Tony on a neuropsych level once he was cured!

But rather than viewing the anti-Extremis serum as something akin to an antidepressant, I'm looking at it through the lens of Extremis itself having been a drug that was active in his system and artificially altering his behavior for years, with Peter's serum working as a one-time cure to terminate the Extremis process! So Tony wouldn't need more doses of the cure serum to avoid some kind of relapse, but, he would have entrenched patterns of thought/behavior that he would need to be mindful of!

Having spent mumble years with basically like, his "caring about other people in a meaningful way" centers selectively turned off, Tony's brain would still have those instinctive impulses towards "me and mine come absolute first," "the ends justify the means"-type thinking-- that's what his brain was doing for all that time, so those neural pathways and patterns of thought are very well-established and the sort of "path of least resistance" for his mind!

BUT now that he can access other ways of thinking, he would be able to quickly and consciously override those patterns of thought with more moral, reasonable, less self-centered patterns of thinking that reflect his actual moral core, and over time those would become the very-first-instinct thoughts for him again as well. But that's part of why I mentioned him struggling with his decision-making/parenting instincts here-- he would never actually end up in the same moral place as SIM again because he's just not capable of that level of cruelty/megalomania, but he questions a lot exactly how much his thinking is still influenced by the state of mind he was in for all that time.

Like: he did do a lot of heinous, illegal stuff as SIM! Is it reasonable or is it distorted that he's not planning on holding himself accountable for that legally because it would hurt Peter for him to go to prison? Is that being a good dad, or is that self-justification? Is planning on letting Peter stay home from school as long as he wants being respectful of the trauma he went through, or is it more toxic SIM "keep him where he belongs" codependence?

(A much more thorny question: one of the ways to dig himself out of the "business" relationships SIM made for him would be to kill a bunch of other crime lords. Is it SIM's influence that it even occurred to him as an option, whether or not he seriously considers it? What if he does seriously consider it? Is that more """the ends justify the means""" or is there any actual justice in that?

What if the only way out that poses the least risk to his and Peter's lives is to go through with SIM's plan and just be a less tyrannical shadow puppetmaster? That's pretty blatantly, objectively immoral-- but if it's to save his kid...??????)

SO: tl;dr, no relapse, but he is in for a rough time when it comes to reckoning with his own morality and the echoes of what multiple years of toxic neural pathways do to a person, haha.]]

[12raccoonsinadress]

Hey so the recent Roe v Wade overturn has rlly taken a toll on my mental health, and I wanted to know if I could have some headcanons on how the MHA boys would help y/n through having their right to abortion revoked😞 If you don’t want anything political on your page I completely understand. Have a good day❤️

I'm not afraid to admit the fact that everything happening right now is devastating. It's such a serious matter and personally, I feel romanticizing it would be inappropriate. Instead, here's something that while yes, touches the subject, avoids turning this extremely real situation into something of fantasy ~ 💚

1A Boys HC : When You Don't Want A Baby (Fluff/Implied Smut)

Izuku

He planned on letting you decide if or when you ever wanted to have a baby, so he didn't ever really bring it up unless you did. He didn't want to make you feel like he was ever pushing for it.

Though the one time the conversation came up, he did say that he'd be willing to start a family with you, but that he also was ok if it was just the two of you because as long as he has you, he's happy.

He'd definitely do his research on birth controls. For you and him. When you said you didn't want a baby for the time, he wanted to be sure he honored your choice by keeping bedroom activities safe. Between your birth control, his birth control, and condoms, let's just say that you guys are pretty safe from having a baby anytime soon.

Bakugo

Kids annoy the shit out of him typically so let's just say he isn't exactly pushing you into having a baby anytime soon. If it was your idea he might, but since at least for the time being you both seem to be on the same page he doesn't tend to think or talk about it.

He may have asked you once, just because he wanted to be sure this was what you wanted and not just because he always seemed to not like the idea (Though he'd say it in a less gentle, caring way). Once you confirmed you simply didn't want kids you both moved on from the subject.

Since it felt like this might be a permanent decision for you both, you brought up the idea of getting your tubes tied. Something that'll keep it from happening by accident, but also something reversible, on the very off chance you eventually change your mind. Whether you do or not, he's gonna back you up the whole way.

Shoto

After seeing what his dad did and how screwed up most of his kids came out, he would be weary about having kids to begin with, so you saying that you don't want any is a relief to him. He wouldn't want to give that man grandchildren or risk not being able to provide a normal childhood because of his own trauma.

He asked you about it a fairly short ways into your relationship. It was something he thought was important to ask, and he didn't want to risk getting deep into a relationship only to find you wanted like 10 kids. He was very happy the two of you could agree to maybe not have kids.

Shoto would ask you about your thoughts on him getting a vasectomy. He doesn't wanna risk it, and he feels it'd just be easier for him to take away the chance of him getting you pregnant all together. And it'd be a one time thing instead of you constantly getting birth control.

Kirishima

He thinks having a kid would be cool. Be able to raise a little human with you and stuff, but he isn't going to let it change anything when he finds out you don't really want that. He's still gonna love you regardless, and respect your decision.

He teased you about letting him pop a baby in you a few times until you told him it wasn't something you really wanted. He very quickly apologized. He didn't mean to make you uncomfortable with the jokes, but he definitely wants to do better to be more aware of the topic in the future. Anytime someone asks if you two will be having a little one, he respectfully says the two of you have decided against it.

He's definitely been really doing his research on the new discoveries in masculine birth controls. He knows your on it and he wants to feel like he's doing his part in respecting your choice.

Denki

He's a bit of a deviant as is, so he's totally chill not making a baby anytime soon. Means he gets you to himself more often ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). In all seriousness, he's just chilling knowing he doesn't go on a 9 month break from fun times with you.

He was kinda surprised weirdly enough when you told him. He kinda always just assumed that would be the next step for you guys so he hadn't really thought much of it. So when you tell him you'd rather not, he asks you why you felt that way. Not to change your mind, he's genuinely curious.

May as well own stock in condoms. He practically has a collection. He likes ones that have cool colors an stuff because he thinks it makes things interesting. Making safety fun.

Iida

Let's be honest, he comes from a traditional family. He sorta wanted kids. Even so he understands and supports the fact that it would be your body carrying the baby, and that it would be something you'd have to do together. He's not gonna make you go through any of that for something you don't really want.

He was a bit disappointed when you told him, but he didn't make it a pity party. He asked a few logically questions like whether this was a permanently never wanted kids or a not now, or if you'd want to go about it in a different way that wouldn't hinder your body such as adoption or fostering. He wants to know exactly the kind of future you want so he can plan it with you.

Another one who'd lean towards a vasectomy. Let's be honest this man know what he likes in bed and one of those things would be a bit risky otherwise. Plus, if you ever changed your mind, it's reversible so he can simply adjust accordingly for whatever you want or need of him.

[psych-zone]

11 June 2023, Sunday

12:32 pm

Hi Explorers !!!

How’s everyone doing ? … Really hope each one of you is absolutely fine. Before we together move on to explore me, you have full right to know who I am !!

I am SOMYA , a teen ager ( accurately 18.11 years ). I am done with my schooling from a renowned school St. Thomas School & right now I’m perusing with Bachelors of Arts from DU … I’m also doing Psychology Hons. side by side to attain what I need from my life & not what the life needs from me. So, I would be posting my blogs here so that they can reach up to all of you. My blog account : *Psych - Zone* defines me _ my interest for psych world. I would share on with you guys, what basically Psychology is - how important & helpful it is in this technical world : more of a depressed world.

Problems like :

Trauma Bonding

Indivisual Differences

Intrapersonal relationships & many more will be openly discussed here

All of you are humbly requested to stay connected to me via “Psych - Zone” … together we will beat all the hardships & reach to the Zenith.

All your reviews are most welcome … don’t hesitate to express what you feel about it !!!

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12 June 2023, Monday

6:33 pm

Hi Potential Readers !!!

A very cherish able & benevolent Good Evening to all my readers … Through the depth of my heart that wish each one of you is healthy & fit !!!

Today we would know :

What is psychology ?!

When we hear the word Psychology … what comes to our mind is : brain - decision - mind - understanding.

Exactly ! That is what psychology is !!!!!!!

The word *Psychology* is formed out of the word *Psyche* - that means :

Your mind, your different feelings & attitudes.

# PSYCHOLOGY is the scientific study of mind & behaviour. The psychologists are actively involved in studying & understanding mental processes, brain functions & behaviour.

How Psychology Helps ??!!

Psychology helps us (people) is various dimensions … such as :

1️⃣. It explains why people act in a certain way.

2️⃣. A psychologist can help people improve their decision making.

3️⃣. It guides about the Stress Management techniques.

4️⃣. It studies the behaviour … based on past behaviour - it predicts the future behaviour pattern.

That is all for the beginning.

THANK YOU SO MUCH for connecting with The Psych - Zone

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12 June 2023, Monday

9:45 pm

Hi Efficient Army !!!

Welcome back to The Psych-World … Hopefully all of you are good !!!

* Today, we will be talking about what the actual problem is … where does an awkward behaviour arise from ??!!

1️⃣ . Avoiding Discussion

# Someone exhibiting strange behaviour may not want to engage in important discussions … this leads to issues that remain unresolved.

# For avoiding these very essential discussions the person behaves awkward … to repeal people’s interest in communicating to him/her.

2️⃣. Not taking accountability

# You may find it difficult to acknowledge your mistakes or blame others for your own shortcomings.

# If you are not able to reflect your own behaviour … it will become an issue & affect your personal growth.

Other important factors are as follows :

# Refusing to apologize

# Manipulating others

# Not respecting boundaries

# Being inconsistent

* What to do if you are the problem ??!!

# Improve your mental health

# Offering heartfelt apologies

# Respecting boundaries

# Taking responsibilities

SUMMARY :

*Self - reflection can help you to answer the question : “ Am I the problem ? “

*If you notice the signs of your shortcomings … you can twist them to be your positive point.

*You can consult a therapist for mental health support.

THANK YOU !!

[ervinafindy]

Denny Ja: Building Human Inner Wealth: Religion as the Basis of Tradition and Cultural

In running daily life, humans not only think of physical or material needs. Inner or spiritual wealth is also very important to maintain. Denny JA, a cultural and social activist, teaches the importance of building human inner wealth. According to Denny JA, human inner wealth cannot be bought or inherited. This must be built through life experiences, learning from others, and various religious activities. One important foundation in building inner wealth is religion. Religion that is believed by a person can be the foundation of tradition and cultural for the survival of humans. Religion teaches moral values that must be held firmly by each individual. Religion also teaches about human relations with the Creator, fellow human beings, and the environment. In practicing religion, humans do a variety of religious activities such as worship, reading the scriptures, or participating in social activities in the surrounding environment. Denny JA stressed the importance of practicing religion consistently in order to strengthen inner wealth. According to Denny Ja, inner wealth can also be built through cultural and artistic activities. Cultural activities such as festivals and art exhibitions can be a means to increase sensitivity and concern for the surrounding environment. Through culture and art, humans can also appreciate the diversity and diversity of culture that exists in Indonesia. In addition, inner wealth can also be built through a healthy social life. Denny Ja taught the importance of establishing a good relationship with fellow human beings. This can be done by respecting differences, respecting others, and communicating well. Denny Ja also promotes the importance of reading books to build inner wealth. Through reading books, humans can increase their knowledge of various topics and broaden their horizons. In carrying out daily life, humans must also be able to control emotions and care for mental health. Denny Ja taught the importance of controlling emotions so as not to be carried away in difficult situations. In addition, maintaining mental health is also important so that humans can function well in carrying out daily life. Denny Ja, also known as one of the observers of the election, teaches the importance of building inner wealth to support integrity in society and nation. Inner wealth can strengthen the determination of one's heart and character in making decisions and is responsible for his actions. In ending his writing, Denny Ja said that building human inner richness is a continuous process. He stressed the importance of not stopping learning and improving themselves. Through building inner wealth, humans can live more meaningfully and have high integrity.

Check in full: Denny JA: Building Human Inner Wealth: Religion as the foundation of tradition and cultural

[thewizblog2022]

When should you start looking for the Best Preschool for your child?

If you are going through that phase of life when all your attention is diverted towards your little one's future and you are still not able to decide whether to send him/her to a daycare cum preschool or educate him/her at home in front of your own eyes, then let us tell you, you are not alone. Most parents of preschoolers are in the same kind of dilemma, and that's why here we are, guiding you whether you should get your little one admitted to the best day care in Noida, or not. Keep ticking these boxes in order to make the best decision.  Your kid is energetic, smart and is curious to learn new things  Today's children are very different. They are born smart, are super active and very playful. When their energy is directed towards right things, they tend to learn new skills very quickly - faster than we could ever imagine, but if there is even slight lag of attention, then you will find their notorious side, which might even start bothering family members as a lots of efforts and time is waste in making them understand, feed them etc. If your little one is curious, creative and is always looking to try something new, then start exploring Best Preschools in Noida.Do check out Sportyze, as their curriculum is amazing and the ways they take care of children sets them apart from other preschools in the entire Delhi/NCR region. If he/she is too inclined towards watching TV or phone  Now, let's talk about the totally different characteristics as mentioned in point one. If your little one is addicted to any kind of digital device or TV, then it's actually alarming, as he/she would always prefer to sit in one corner of the house away from the whole world and just watching cartoons and videos. The mental and physical abilities in this case do not develop, which results in issues in the overall development and growth of your little dumpty. Admit him/her to a day care in Noida that focuses equally on studies and sports. Considering health the utmost priority in today's age, you will have to push your child to perform activities that helps in physical fitness after all, mental development is only possible when the body is fit and active, right? If the company of other children makes him happy  A single child will always search a company, as the level of innocence and playfulness that they want, the adults can never match. If you have no other child at home, then never hesitate in sending your little one to the day care in Noida as there, he/she will meet, interact with and be happy in the company of many other kids. Did you know, children learn life’s most important skills from their friends – Yes! It’s not us or the books that can help them become social, develop communication skills or sharpen brain, its other children who they compete with, make them strong and confident within. If you are away from home for the major part of the day Working moms should not at all be guilty, as that’s their personal choice to carry on with their career and should be respected. If you don’t have any trusted help at home, then start searching for the Best Preschools in Noida and most of your problems will be solved, as your little one would be in safest hands and you would be able to monitor him/her from office. If you think, that any/all points are matching your needs, then do not think twice, admit your child to Sportyze and be rest assured of his/her brightest future.

[icouldntfindquiet]

I agree with anon who said sending unsolicited messages to family members is inappropriate. This could very well be why Van isn’t active. I know we are worried about his mental health, but it’s really none of our business. Let Van have his privacy. You might think you’re being respectful, but you’re intruding into his personal life by messaging his family to ask about him.

Van hasn’t been active for a long time so what’s happened 2020 onwards hasn’t changed that, though I’m sure he’s happy with his decision and is better off. Yes, it’s none of my business but I’m willing to intrude just this once to check in on him. This is the first and last time that I will message a family member and I own up to the fact that I shouldn’t have messaged his cousin. I will leave it up to his cousin if he wants to respond or not (if he even sees it).

[melokuhleluthuli]

Factors that influence an individuals positionality

Society is a construct that molds and shapes your values, by the roles in which we play and the environments we engage in. Society has positioned itself to determine what is moral or ethical. I am at a transitional stage of my life where I am starting to find my sense of self, personality trait, moral code, belief system, my strengths, and weaknesses. We were brought up to think that everything we are taught is the bible truth and cannot be altered, I am starting to see the mistakes with that mentality and question, why should we let society define us when we can redefine ourselves as the individuals we are? In this blog, I will share all the factors that influence my positionality.

The functions and roles of men and women were defined by Zulu culture whereby the men were the heads of the households and the women assumed subordinate positions, and that was very evident in the households my parents were raised in, I agree with Sathiparsad et al. (2011) that in rural communities, the father-headed households commanded more power and respect. Making rigid rules, making decisions controlling household activities, and providing financially for the family. I has the privilege of growing up in both a rural and urban area, in the rural community of Elandskop in Pietermaritzburg is where patriarchy operated in the families and influenced family life, we were told that a woman’s job is to perform domestic chores, get married, bear and raise children and be submissive to the husband while males in the community were raised to be dominant, providers, leaders, and head of the household. I’ve seen the patriarchal system at play in at my grandparent’s household where my grandfather was working in town and my grandmother was at Elandskop raising the children, my grandfather was the provider, and my grandmother has never worked in her life. My father wanted a different life then that led by his parents and that is very evident in mu upbringing, we moved to an urban area and the household had no gender roles, my father played a significant role in raising his children with his wife working far from home, he took on the role of primary caregiver. Decisions related to the household were made by both parties. This experience has allowed me to unlearn what society and those before have taught me about the roles and importance of women in society.

Sathiparsad et al. (2011) explain that in South Africa the societies are rapidly changing, and established power relations are being challenged and there is increasing recognition that gender transformation will have benefits for men and women. However, the patriarchy still operates in some societies in South Africa and Cato crest is one of them; it affects many aspects of life, from political leadership, business management, religious institutions, economic system, and property ownership, right down to the family. When providing treatment in the Cato Crest community I must not impose my values and beliefs of how a woman should behave as some women are subjected to the patriarchal system therefore my role is to improve the client’s insight and advocate for her and not invalidate her views.

Gaede & Versteegii-Mojanaga (2011) points out that the right to health care in rural areas is compromised by several health system and socio-economic barriers. This is evident in the Cato crest community where the struggle of standing in the long queue at the clinic in the early hours of the morning just access health care which should be easily available to all.  I initially feared working as a health practitioner due to the pressures that come with the job, and I feel having experienced both a humbling and privileged background I can relate to clients coming from a similar background. In all my treatment sessions or any interaction with clients, I try to put myself in their shoes and provide client-centered intervention and we feel welcomed in the Cato crest community as clients are keen to engage and accept out help and our plan of trying to uplift the community. I come from a Zulu culture and the Christian religion, but I do not impose my beliefs on my clients even if you are Zulu and you do believe in ancestors I do not judge.

I grew up in a black community and was eventually exposed to other races as I went to a multi-racial primary school and high school in a predominantly Indian community. My assumption growing up was that public hospitals or other underprivileged institutions were for non-white people and white people used private healthcare and better facilities. University is a diverse environment therefore I was exposed to other races and sexualities; I had a chance to also assess and treat clients of a different races and sexualities as mine. Mathews (2012) points out that racial and racial equality has not yet been achieved in South Africa, nor indeed in the many other parts of the world which had at some time some form of explicitly segregationist white supremacist order. In one way or another black people still experience racism be it in public areas, schools, or workplaces, however, when I am providing intervention to my clients, I do not look at the race but approach a person as an individual so that I will be ethical and not let my experiences affect intervention.

(The above picture highlights what positionality is and some of the factors that influence our positionality).

Positionality is vital because it forces us to acknowledge our power, privilege, and biases just as we are denouncing the power structures that surround our subjects (Madison 2015). This also highlights that positionality is dynamic and susceptible to change. In occupational therapy, we use a holistic approach, so why would I want my values to impede or hinder providing intervention because of a person’s skin colour, sexuality, gender, or social background, because the main aim of the intervention is to promote function and independence in occupations it is also important to consider the client’s positionality as it can have an impact in treatment. My positionality has been influenced by various social backgrounds, culture, society, and the patriarchy. At the Cato crest community, we should be looking past the client’s gender, race, or family status and treat everybody equally within and outside of intervention. We have implemented programmes that educate the community about the role of OT, maternal health, child development, and common conditions in the community. It is vital to consider one’s positionality when working at a community level as you are exposed to different situations in the community, and it is easy to judge from a point of privilege. Positionality is an important consideration when working at a community level because directly or indirectly it influences how your treatment is carried out and determining the outcome of treatment.

References:

[Image] https://engineerinclusion.com/what-is-positionality/

Gaede, B. M., & Versteeg-Mojanaga, M. (2011). The state of the right to health in rural South Africa. Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/326635665_The_state_of_the_right_to_health_in_rural_South_Africa

Madison, D. S. (2005). Critical ethnography: Method, ethics, and performance. SAGE Publications, Inc., https://www.doi.org/10.4135/9781452233826

Matthews S. (2012) White Anti-Racism in Post-Apartheid South Africa, Politikon, 39:2, 171-188, doi: 10.1080/02589346.2012.683938

Sathiparsad R., Taylor M., Dlamini S. (2008) Patriarchy and family life: Alternative views of male youth in rural South Africa, Agenda, 22:76, 4-16. Retrieved from https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10130950.2008.9674925

[theblindgoddess]

Batman au where everything is the same, except Bruce is a woman instead of a man.

Her name is Beatrice.

Her personality is exactly the same.

She’s still 6′ something and built like a tank.

Her superhero name is still Batman.

She was originally just going to go by The Bat, but then the media started calling her Batman, and she just rolled with it. Adds an extra layer of protection for her secret identity.

Some extra points that I find important

After the media dubs her ‘The Batman’, Bea spends hours gargling gravel in random closets in the manor to perfect her ‘manly Batman growly voice’ as she calls it. Her crime fighting identity is now male, and while she doesn’t speak much in the early days, when the time comes that she will need to speak she might as well have a voice that matches the name. She’s not going to do this halfway.

Bea has been diagnosed with OCD and is either somewhere on the autism spectrum or has ADHD, she stopped going to the psychiatrist before they could figure out which one. (Not that different from cannon, but it was important to me to mention it.)

While most of the Justice League only finds out Batman is a woman when she reveals her identity to them on her own terms, Wounder Woman can recognize a fellow warrior women almost on sight. She pulls Batman aside privately later to explain that she knows, and states that while she doesn’t understand why she is keeping her gender hidden from the others she will respect her decision to do so. They have girls nights twice a month.

When 12-year-old Jason Todd finds out that Batman is a woman after getting caught trying to steal her tires, his immediate response is to inform Bea that his respect for Batman has just increased immensely. Jason is very proud to have a new mom who could probably bench Superman.

While Bea enjoys wearing dresses, she mainly wears suits, pants, and traditionally ‘male’ clothing. Her reasons behind this being that it can be very hard to find dresses that fit her with out having them custom made, and while that's barely a hindrance with how much money she has, she also thinks that she just generally doesn’t look flattering in most dresses because of her build.

Branching off the last point, Bea had some major body image issues in her teenage years. While she wasn’t as huge back then, she still had a fair amount of muscle mass from being incredibly active in a few different sports and with helping Alfred take care of the manor wherever it was needed. She has also always preferred close cropped hair to longer styles that would just get in the way and annoy her. Because of these things she always looked more masculine and never fit the ‘ideal’ look for woman. The inadequate feelings caused by that were made worse because she felt like she didn’t know how to be a woman. While Leslie Tompkins was a great older female presence in Bea’s life, Leslie couldn’t be a constant presence. And while Alfred tried his best - and passed with flying colours and unflappable determination in most areas - he was still a man and just couldn’t understand somethings about womanhood no matter how hard he tried. Bea kept all of these negative thoughts and feelings about herself bottled up inside of her like the emotionally constipated person she is until one day everything bubbled over with explosive force and disastrous consequences. It was a bad few months for both her and Alfred after that incident. Alfred still feels guilty for not noticing the signs sooner. As an adult Bea has become one of the biggest advocates for healthy body positivity and mental health. She still deals with those thoughts and feelings, though not to the same extent and she recognizes that the majority of them stem from her OCD. She has copping mechanisms set up to help handle these thoughts and feelings and will almost always go talk to Alfred when any of her emotions become to much and she starts to drown in them. (One notable exception to the ‘always go talk to Alfred when everything gets to much’ rule was after Jason’s death.)

All of the few dresses and skirts that Bea owns are ankle or floor length and show very little skin. She just doesn’t feel comfortable having a lot of skin showing, to her it feels like an invasion of her privacy for anyone other then the people she trusts most in the world to see more skin then just what is generally visible while wearing a t-shirt and shorts that cover the knees. Tight fitting clothing gives her a similar feeling of discomfort, so if the outfit is more form fitting it has to be covering her ankles and wrists, but if it shows skin it has to be on the looser side. Everyone who is close to her understands this fact, and it has caused problems with injuries on the field of battle before. (Whenever one of her kids thinks that they have lost her trust they are very surprised when they are proven wrong the next time Bea gets hurt in battle with them and she lets them treat her injuries. Jason cries every time at this show of trust when it’s directed at him. Sometimes when Bea knows she’s messed up with one of her kids and doesn’t know how to fix it, she’ll go on patrol with them and get hurt on purpose just to let them know she still loves them and still trusts them even if she can’t say it. Alfred, Cass, and Tim are the only ones to have caught on to this behaviour yet, but Damian is suspicious and very close to figuring it out.)

Damian is still her biological kid, Talia is still his other parent, and Bea still had no idea of his existence for the first 9-ish years of his life. Haven’t figured out how that works exactly yet, if anyone has any suggestions I’m all ears.

Bea has less of a ‘sleeps around’ reputation then her cannon male counterpart mainly because most of Gotham high society is intimidated by pretty strong lady who could probably crush like a grape if she really wanted to and they have no idea how to handle it because there is no precedent for something like this. The last time Gotham high society had to deal with a woman even remotely as huge as Bea was in the mid to late 1800s with one of her ancestors. (Who was also named Beatrice and who is considered to be the first great Matriarch of the Wayne family as it is agreed upon by most historians that the Wayne name and business are as powerful and influential as they are today because of many of her actions and choices.) There have been plenty of tall and muscular women in Gotham high society, but Bea is just so huge that they just don’t know the proper and polite way to approach her. Would it be insensitive to bring up her size in casual conversation? This inability for the socialites to figure out how to talk to Bea about anything other than business is not helped by the airhead persona Bea puts of in public. She doesn’t mind though, people are hard to talk to, the less people that she has to mindlessly chat with the better. The majority of those Gotham socialites that aren’t intimidated by her size will mainly approach her for a relationship for either fame, money, or purely for sexual desires. Bea doesn’t want an intimate relationship with someone unless it’s going to be a serious one and with someone who cares for her and wants the relationship because of her and not what she could give them, and after the forth potential partner approached her purely to increase their standing in high society and for some fun in the sheets, she decided that it was not worth the damage her self worth would take for whatever extra secret identity protection being an airhead who also likes to sleep around might give her.

The whole ‘Batman is a dude but Beatrice Wayne is a girl’ thing did throw Tim for a bit when he figured out Robin’s identity. As far as 9-year-old Tim could tell, the only man who was a part of Dick Grayson’s life was Alfred, and Alfred looks nothing like Batman. It didn’t stall him for long though, because once he realized Batman and Bea had the exact same body type it wasn’t that far of a stretch to assume that Bea chose the name Batman as a way to hide her secret identity more, and he admits that it’s a smart idea. (Later when Tim takes up the superhero identity of Red Robin, he carefully crafts his costume to make him appear more feminine for the exact same reason. The flame wars on the internet over what Red Robin’s gender is are absolutely legendary, no one can say that they are one hundred percent certain as to what this vigilante’s gender might be)

Whenever someone finds out that Batman is indeed, in fact, a woman, they completely loose their minds. Some of them are in complete disbelief until it has been proven to them without a shadow of a doubt that Batman is in fact female. Some look deep inside of themselves and ask “how did I not figure it out?”. Others, mainly the non human/not raised in human society and culture ones (and John Constantine), go “ok, thank you for trusting me with this clearly very personal to you information” and move on with their lives.

A small handful of villains, both big bosses and small time henchmen, have figured out that Batman is a woman. Lex Luther pieced it together because he’s smart and is willing to accept the idea of women who are tanks unlike other smart villainous men who despite all the extensive evidence they have collected clearly pointing to at least the possibility that Beatrice Wayne is Batman refuse to entertain the idea simple because Bea is a woman and Batman has man in his name. (Lex’s right hand man is a very capable woman named Mercy, after all. He may treat most other people on this planet like they are beneath him, but he will never treat one gender as less then the others.) The majority of bad guys who know that Batman is a women don’t know her secret identity, and only realized Batman is a women because they were in a fight where someone got in a lucky shot at the Dark Knight, making him down for the count, and instead of whichever one of his army of children was with him in that fight got worried, but instead of calling out ‘dad’ before beating the stuffing out of all the collective bad guy force, they screamed ‘mom’ before beating the stuffing out of the collective bad guy force.

Selina Kyle found out that Batman is a woman one night a few years into both of their nightly careers. As Catwoman, she saw Batman sitting on the edge of a building looking even more broody then usual and offered to be a listening ear for Batman to rant to if he wanted. Batman, having had a crappy week, happily agreed, and given the strange nature of their relationship figured that it was only a matter of time before Catwoman found out her identity, completely dropped the ‘manly Batman growly voice’ and proceeded to rant about some gold digger who wasn’t taking no for an answer and who was starting to take it to far and about some  board member she was to deal with who keeps disregarding her and brushing her off when she tries to give her input into the inner workings of her own company, and the only reason this week hasn't fallen into her top 10 worst weeks of her life is because all of the pain resistance training that she endured before she let herself become Gotham’s protector that is making her period cramps manageable. Selina listens as she said she would and has a slowly building existential crisis because, holy crap, Batman is a woman, and not only that, but she’s giving out info that could probably easily link Batman to her secret identity, and is Batman actually trusting Catwoman, one of her more infamous rouges, with her secret identity?! After her hour long rant, Batman turns to look at Catwoman asking if she might have any advice, to find that Catwoman has done the mental equivalent of blue screening while trying to process all of this. They soon become kinda friends after this and Selina joins Bea and Diana on their bi-monthly girls nights. (Or Diana joins Bea and Selina on their bi-monthly girls nights, depends on if Selina and Bea become friends before or after the Justice League forms. Pick which one you like better.

Batman still has a bit of a reputation for ‘being involved’ with some villains.

When it comes time for Bea to give the puberty talk to any of the boys she’s raising, she freaks out. No mater how many books she reads, how many experts she consults, how many times she’s done this in the past, she still convinced that she’s gonna mess it up and misinform one of her boys on something very important when it comes to their biology and development that will have long lasting and horrible repercussions all because she doesn’t have personal experience in this area. Alfred helps out to keep Bea from having a panic attack, because in all honesty Bea would do just fine on her own for this parenthood milestone, the only thing that would negatively effect the situation, and therefore the outcome, is Bea having a panic attack. When it’s time to give Cass the puberty talk Bea breaths a huge sigh of relief because, finally!, she has personal experience with female puberty.

As a bit of a joke, Dick would give Bea presents for both mother’s day and father’s day, because while Bea may be a mother, Batman is, technically speaking in the eyes of most of the world, a father. This habit spread to Jason who would always try to one up the presents Dick would give Bea out of spite that Dick was kind of of jerk. When Tim joined the family and saw Dick giving Bea presents on both days, he just assumed that that’s what your supposed to do because his parents were never around for father’s day or mother’s day. After that the tradition just kind of stuck to the Wayne family, and they all give presents to multiple important parental figures on both holidays. ( It takes Tim years to realize that that is, in fact, not how everyone does things, but is in fact just a thing they do. He is very shocked.)

That’s all I have for now. If anyone else has any ideas they would like to add, please do!