#bc they talk about it like they decided in december/january

[phlondsbian]

they've talked about it before but the fact that they were kind of planning to dip after december is CRAZY to me. they were gonna go through all of gamingmas just to go "well that was fun. okay bye" like WHAT. what do you mean that was a temporary comeback how would that have even happened

[shadebloopnik]

Calling for help from any kind fandom citizen, I have a survey of which I am in dire need of responses for school.

So if you could answer this short survey below, it only takes like, 2-3 minutes minimum, thank you so muchhhh ⬇️⬇️⬇️

Audience's Perception on AI-Generated Works

I'll be accepting free fic commissions for responses

Reblogs are appreciated(on my knees for em)

Some tea abt why I made this survey, the very polite beef i have with my instructor, and details on the fic comms underneath

Ok, so like, long story short, our professor assigned us to make a short survey about anything related to technology and stuff like that. I figured i'd make something related to AI art, bc yknow, at least I'd be somewhat interested in the topic.

And btw, I like to say our prof is a nice guy, reeeally, but he's also, VERY pro AI, for anything. I've gotten into soft debates on that whenever there's presentations in class, and he keeps dismissing me. "Its progress" he says, and doesn't really listen whenever I talk further about it. SO, in addition to this being for my grade(smthn important, im sure), i'm also doing this to nicely shove the opinions of the crowd into his face.

So if some of the questions sound passive aggressive, please dont mind it, as he is going to be part of the editor, and I want him to see it.

also Twitter is the only thing im deadnaming, so if thats a gamechanger for you, I apologize in advance

ALSO, my extremely kind and benevolent instructor whom I just TRULY adore with all my heart (no im not gritting my teeth), have decided that it should have a minimum of 150 respondents to even be counted, a funny condition when he gave us like, barely 2 weeks but ok.

I've sent this out to people in my school and general friends more than a week ago, but I'm still lacking at LEAST 90 responses. (They suggested it was my topic that was the issue. BORING they said I just-) I only have a day or so to get more people.

SOOOO to sweeten the pot and as a form of apology.

Everyone who answers this survey can write down in their reblogs or replies a ship/prompt they'd want me to make a fic. 3 with the most popular votes gets written. Just write down the name/alias you've written in the survey with ur replies.

Minimum 2k words for each fic. It shall be posted by the end of December or early January on ao3

YES even nsfw ones, but you'll have to clarify it if it wins(im gonna be shocked if its something i truly cannot write about tbh)

I figured this is a fun way to force myself back into the writing scheme tbh. I have written some concepts before, like the AU's I had pinned, and some drabbles, but so far none that really stuck so meep

I would prefer its a fandom or ship im currently fixated on/know about, like Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, Owl House, Orv, Epic, etc.

[myokk]

HOLA! ❤️ First of all, dropping some kudos because I love you and your art so much (basically my blog can be your side blog too at this point!) ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Second, from the character ask, I'd like to know about 3,4 and 20 for both Eloise and Leo 😁

Hope you have a wonderful day/night!

HOLA MI ITALIANA FAVORITA💓​ I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR ALL OF THE YAPPING I'M ABOUT TO DO🤭​ will this get you to finally visit me🥺​

I'm going to answer these for Eloise SINCE I already did 3 for Leo & I have someone asking me about 4 for Leo as well🥺💓

3) What was the first thing you decided on, the character's name, appearance, personality or their role in the story?

This is a tricky answer…just bc my evil gremlin mc in the game has NOTHING to do with Eloise in my writing. I guess I would say her name? I was just thinking of what would be the most British sounding name I could think of when I started playing in December🙂‍↕️

But then my imagination took hold of me…I started thinking about Eloise’s backstory…and when I thought of how all of her family dynamics/how she grew up would influence her personality I started to be really dissatisfied with the game and the lack of choice we have while playing. SO I gave up on the game completely after the restricted section quest and started to use my free time to write my fic in January🥹🫶 but her backstory, personality, and role in my story are definitely the most interesting things about her to me!!

Bonus: my first ever drawings of her in January!!! Bad quality bc it’s an insta story screenshot😆💓 (I redid one for my fic🤭)

4) And reverse, which one of the four things did you struggle with the most?

Hmmmmm😭😭 I think her personality is what I struggled with the most and continue to struggle with as I write!!!! I always want her to feel like a *real* person with flaws, but ALSO convey to the reader why they should love her as much as I do. I think I’m successful bc I get comments/messages a lot from people telling me how much she resonates with them (and she’s some people’s favorite???😳💘) but I STILL CANT HELP BUT FEEL INSECURE ABOUT IT !!! It’s so hard sometimes keeping in mind how she is and how she thinks, and I never want her to be wishy-washy or doing things out of character for her. It’s a fun challenge but a challenge😭💓 (also her appearance changes like crazy in my art but whatever I’m learning😆)

20) bonus: share any additional thoughts, art, favorite scenes, anything you’ve been waiting for a chance to ramble about.

DES YOU REALLY WANTED ME TO YAP WHEN YOU SENT THIS MESSAGE😆😆😆😆😆

I really, REALLY want to yap about the foreshadowing and scenes I’m working towards in my fic BUT IVE ONLY TALKED TO LIKE ONE OR TWO PEOPLR ABOUT MY PLANS ( @choccy-milky & @kay9leo 🤭🤭) AND I DONT WANT TO SPOIL ANYTHING EVEN THOUGH I DONT HAVE MANY READERS😆😆😆😆😆😆😆 maybe in the future…

This is me redrawing the chess scene from my fic bc I’m really dissatisfied with how Seb looks in the original (he’s probably my LEAST FAVORITE TO DRAW BC IT’S IMPOSSIBLE !!!!!!!)

And ummmm….hmmm Eloise is DEFINITELY not a self-insert character to me, but I DID give her aspects of myself. Things like…we have the same birthday (January 31) and eye color (dark green), and I tend to overthink a lot and can be in my own head maybe too much, but I’m ALSO a lot more assertive and gremlin than she is😆😆😆😆 I love the fact that she’s so soft and sweet💓💓💓 & I just want to wrap her up in a big hug and never let go of her🥺🤲

(Imelda is my self-insert tbh…and this moment in my fic was ME😤:

At the sight of Imelda's worried face her throat contracted - Eloise found she couldn't speak - and she burst into tears again. They were rolling, hot and salty, down her cheeks and she hid her crumpled face back into the crooks of her arms. Imelda immediately wrapped her arms around Eloise, and she melted into her friend's embrace. Hands gently stroking her hair as she cried and cried and cried, murmurs whispered in soft Spanish to the top of her head.

She was overwhelmed, desolate, lonely.

I feel really bad for Eloise at this point in her story, but I also find it really interesting to keep poking her to see when she finally snaps and decides that she NEEDS to stand up for herself and what she wants. She hasn’t quite realized that she’s the only one who’s ultimately in charge of her life & I’m really really enjoying watching her become the person she’s meant to be🥹🫶🥹🫶

[birdiewriteslit]

wildest dreams au

luke hughes x abigail abernathy

masterlist

glamorousgail🔒

tagged rudeth, drewstarkey, jonathandavissofficial, madisonbaileybabe

Liked by rudeth and 17 others

glamorousgail miss this gang

View comments

drewstarkey soon🏄‍♂️

madisonbaileybabe summer cannot come soon enough

glamorousgail @/madisonbaileybabe literally three days into january and sick of it

lhughes_06 @/glamorousgail you live in new england

glamorousgail @/lhughes_06 fine i’ll just move to florida without you…

lhughes_06 @/glamorousgail DO NOT

madelyncline i miss you cutie pie

❤️ by author

jonathandavissofficial pogue life is the best life

glamorousgail @/jonathandavissofficial if that ain’t the truth

carlaciagrant ugh i miss these vibes

hichasestokes 🤙🤙

rudeth guys i inspired this post

❤️ by author

lhughes_06 @/rudeth well aren’t you special

January 3, 2024

—

messages 5:04 pm

luke: are you seriously still talking to rudy

abigail: he’s my friend so yes

luke: do you remember why he broke up with you

abigail: believe it or not i do and we’ve talked about it

abigail: he feels really bad and i don’t want to fuck up what we have right now especially with season 4 on the horizon

luke: gail that doesn’t fix what he did

luke: i’m looking out for you

abigail: i know that’s what you think you’re doing but trust me luke i know how to handle this

abigail: i’ve had exes who didn’t like our friendship and when they broke up with me bc of it it’s never bothered you this much

luke: whatever just forget about it

abigail: good luck tonight

read 5:17 pm

—

Abigail set her phone down and rubbed a hand over her face. She let out a frustrated sigh. It was true, she had a few ex boyfriends who hadn’t loved the idea of her being so close with other guys.

Rudy was one of them, but him and Abigail had finally reached a point where that didn’t matter, and they could go back to what they were before they started dating during the filming of season one of OBX.

She wished Luke would understand that Rudy had changed, but she knew the real reason he was upset about it, even if they pretended it never happened.

December 31, 2023

After the fireworks and the party, Abigail and the boys had successfully made it back to her apartment.

They made a great drinking game out of Monopoly on her bathroom floor, and it was getting a little wild.

Jack had almost flipped the board a few times because Abigail threatened to take his properties (even though that was against the rules).

“That’s it! I can’t afford a fucking hotel, I’m quitting this,” Quinn announced, standing from the bathroom tile, wobbling a bit before taking a few slow steps toward the door. He didn’t make it far before he slipped on some spare Monopoly dollars and came crashing down into the bathtub.

Jack laughed hysterically as Quinn groaned from the tub.

“I’ll go get some water for these guys,” Abigail decided, patting Luke’s arm before heading to the kitchen.

Luke glanced down at his phone in a nervous manner. “Wait up,” he said, following her into the hall.

Abigail took two glasses from the cabinet and placed them on the counter. “You think I need help?” she said, teasing.

“I think you’re perfectly capable,” he said, hands in his pockets as he stood by the island.

“Alright,” she responded skeptically.

Luke cleared his throat. “There’s a minute until midnight,” he said suddenly.

“Really? I didn’t know it was that late already.” She filled up each cup and put them in front of Luke on the island.

“Time flies when you’re having fun.” He looked at her like he was expecting something. He wanted Abigail to make the connection. He wanted her to round the counter and get closer to him. And then, he wanted her to kiss him when the countdown was over.

He could hear his heart pounding in his ears. Abigail wasn’t saying anything. She was looking at him with her lips parted, her eyebrows pushed together. Luke thought, for a moment, for a good thirty seconds, that that look meant she didn’t want what he did.

On the tv in the living room that was still playing from before they all left to go see the fireworks, the countdown had reached twenty seconds.

Luke’s eyes glanced down at Abigail’s body, he couldn’t hold eye contact for much longer without imploding. The strap of her tank top had fallen from her shoulder. Absentmindedly, he reached out to fix it.

When he did, he looked back to her face and saw she was staring at his lips. As the countdown finished, she grabbed his hand and guided it to her neck, pulling him forward simultaneously and kissing him hard.

Cheers could be heard from the television, but Luke could hear nothing over the sound of the blood rushing to his ears.

Maybe it was the alcohol that made Abigail that confident, or maybe it was just how tired she was of wanting to kiss him but never being able to.

She pulled away faster than she wanted to. Luke stared at her with a dumbstruck look on his face. Abigail avoided his eyes and grabbed the glasses from the counter, taking them to where Jack and Quinn were waiting.

January 3, 2024

Abigail didn’t talk to Luke about the kiss after it happened. Luke never mentioned anything about it to Abigail either, but she couldn’t help but wonder if it had been more than just a mistake she made when she was drunk.

What did it mean to him? How would it affect their relationship if he wanted it? Were they just going to stay friends or become more?

“I can’t do this right now,” she muttered to herself, before throwing herself back on the couch and passing out.

When she woke up, the Devils game was over. They won, but her nap rendered her groggy and feeling even worse.

She found her phone on the floor and picked it up, deciding to make a call. It rung for about a second before Quinn picked up.

“Abby, what’s up?”

“I just took a fat nap and I feel horrible,” she stated plainly.

Quinn laughed on the other side of the phone. “I feel that. Did you catch the game?”

“No, I’ve been asleep, Quinn. I can’t do this sun down at four thing.” She scowled at the dark sky outside her window.

“Even though you’ve lived in Boston your whole life? I’d think you’d be used to it by now,” Quinn said. “Are you okay?”

Quinn heard it in Abigail’s voice. She didn’t take that nap because she felt overwhelmed by the darkness. She sighed into the phone.

“Luke and I got into a sort of fight before the game. It wasn’t really a fight, he’s just upset I’ve been out with Rudy.” Abigail conveniently left out the whole kissing his brother thing, she just needed Quinn’s reassurance, like she always did.

“He seemed pissed tonight, at least on tv. Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really, but thanks for picking up, Quinny. I just wanted to let somebody know. You know, before I think about it too much.”

“We wouldn’t want that.” Abigail could hear the smile in his voice. They said goodbye and hung up the phone.

Abigail opened her messages and saw nothing new. Then, she checked twitter, and promptly closed the app after realizing she couldn’t escape her problems.

[doorp]

What started out as theories abt when the main cast died but got silly

Annabel + Lenore ✨

This one is pretty straightforward, there’s these Barbie movie redraws flynn did that shows Annabel and Lenore being caught by “NMPD nevermore police department” , with the year 1901 in the corner, implying that’s when they died and got sent to nevermore

This little 1901 in the corner is interesting on like a meta level to me bc 1. in the original Barbie meme theres no date on the slate thingies, so flynn decided to add that piece of info on her own, and 2. this was just after episode 67 came out (on fp I think) and uh little tidbit, before that episode there was a theory that Theo died in like the 1860s or something based on the logo in the newspaper abt his death, the ny daily tribune, and after episode 67 came out and ira mentioned a ship that wasn’t available for public use until 1899 on the discord we were trying to do mental gymnastics to make the 2 dates work but then red came on like “please we accidentally grabbed the wrong logo it’s meant to read new York tribune not New York daily tribune its fixed now we fixed it please” and then a few days later they streamed doing this piece

Anyway, ira talks about the oceanic, which was “the finest ocean liner in the world” the *largest ocean liner in the world* until 1901

The RMS oceanic had its maiden voyage in September of 1899, at the beginning of fall. Annabel says she arrived in New York a fortnight before meeting Lenore, presumably during the spring. Annabel arrives at lenores house in april/may of 1900, spends six months there, and then leaves around the fall, probably somewhere around September or October. Lenore then spends a few months doing her thing and then arrives at her family’s home in either December 1900 or January 1901, during the winter. HERES where it gets interesting. We can assume that Annabel died in the cold, from her spectres chilling atmosphere and all together appearance of corpse in a freezer. She even has frostbite on her fingers and toes, as well as snowflake like glitter in her veil. We can also assume she died on her wedding day, the way she wears her rings on different hands and her wedding dress in spectre form. So if she died in the cold and on her wedding day, then when was her wedding, and how could it be in winter?

heres my 2 theories

1. Lenore beats Annabel at chess just for funsies fairly quickly after arriving, then they try to elope and get caught by their dads

2. Lenore courts Annabel, wins her hand, and they get engaged. Since engagements usually lasted around 6 months to 2 years, their engagement could have been anywhere from however long it takes Lenore to win at chess to December 1901. If their wedding day was in November/December, that means Lenore got away with pretending to be a man for a whole YEAR and they spent that year just being gay and shit/doing schemes.

I personally like option 2 more bc its just sadder that they did get away w it for a while then ultimately got caught - it would also explain why Annabel is just SO into Lenore, if all she remembers is that year they spent being all sneaky and gay and shit, it would explain how she’s just used to flirting and holding onto Lenore in secret. It would also explain why Annabel assumes Lenore is up to scheming at nevermore. if they eloped a few weeks after they reunited it would still be like yeah that makes sense they are such u haul lesbians, but them becoming sneaky codependent gays ripped from each other on their wedding day just hurts more and makes more sense time/character wise

Duke - 1912, maybe even 1912 specifically, idk

Duke has a coin that’s dated to 1912, and Eulalie says it looks brand new. There’s been arguments about wether or not the coin is actually newly minted, but I don’t think we can say for sure. It might not matter either way- I have a theory that the suit cases the students carry aren’t actually random personal items of interest, but a suitcase they packed right before a pivotal event in their lives. Perhaps Duke does have newly minted coins in his suitcase, but he didn’t actually die in 1912. Also! Duke is implied to be a Houdini like figure, so I imagine he’s not later than the 20s.

Pluto - 1914 ish

Plutos spectre wears a British ww1 military uniform, its debated wether or not the jacket was his dads or his, but regardless he couldn’t have died earlier than 1914. Pluto is named after the cat in the short story called The Black Cat by Edgar Allan poe. In the story a cat named Pluto gets its eye slashed out by its drunken owner, eventually getting hung from a tree by the man. Theres obvious references to the story in Plutos design and shit overall, when he manifests a belt snaps around his neck implying he died from strangulation, his spectre has like, a pluming collar/leash of smoke around its neck, his spectre looks like it’s made of ash kinda (someone described him as a burnt rabbit to me once) which is probably a reference to the part in the story where the man’s house burns down, only 1 wall remaining erect, with the image of a black cat scorched into it. Plutos eye is covered by his hair, he walks into a door frame, he’s got spectre abilities called “blink” and “evil eye” so w Pluto until we get more info it’s no earlier than 1914 if you subscribe to the Pluto went to war theory or no earlier than like, say the 20s? if you subscribe to the Plutos dad was a vet theory

Berenice - 1920s

Shes a flapper, cmon. shes from the 1920s. Look at her. We already know she was run over by a cop car after running from some guy, and I tried to look into where the cop car was from but i didn’t have much luck. mostly just confirmed the era, when I searched cop cars of the 1920s pretty similar images to the one that killed bee show up. A few others I think have looked into it more? but im not completely sure. There’s been a lot of theories about where Berenice is from, I’ve seen Louisiana, Chicago, Harlem (Harlem renaissance specifically) but there’s not a lot of conclusive info about Berenice. we know her pearls were real, in the way they scattered, so she had so have some means of affording them. Pearls are held together on a string, but only real pearls have pieces of metal between the pearls to keep them from rubbing against each other. Bees pearls scatter in long strings, not completely all over the place like fake pearls without that structure would.

Eulalie - 1935

The song Eula sings in her death flashback is a Japanese lullaby that was rediscovered in 1935. Its a popular theory that Eulalies death was a hate crime, a fire started because of hate towards Japanese Americans during ww2. She probably died in the forties in america, I don’t think she died in Hiroshima or Nagasaki, the fire that killed her isnt how atomic bombs would have killed her. The kid she sings to asks if someone started the fire on purpose, so imo it was likely a hate crime.

Morella - 1950s - 70s??

Okay so, Morella. we know the least about her. with will we can guess that he was lower class and stuff, but all we know abt Morella is that she’s Irish. Shepards pie and Guinness is pretty timeless. The reason I say 50s to 70s is bc according to Remigoesinsane the clasp to her locket started to be used around that time! that’s all I have on her tbh, a theory of mine is that she died in a factory accident trying to save someone when the machinery went crazy, but that’s mostly it.

Ada - 1930s

Ada’s clothes in her death flashback match those worn by maids in the 1930s, and the lingerie she wears in the manor also matches lingerie worn in the 30s. It would also make sense for Ada’s character to be from the 30s. That decade was called the “somber thirties” bc of how fucked up the economy was after the stock market crash. It was a major time of economic disparity, and Ada’s obsession with trying to seem upper class elite could stem from not having much when she died. She probably sees nevermore as a blank slate, a place where people will see her as more than just “the help” would also make sense that the man that killed her was a rich guy using his power to take advantage of her and get away with the crime. Especially since the poem, Tamerlane, was from the pov of a rich guy lamenting a relationship he had with a lower class girl named Ada.

Prospero ✨

PROSPERO! prospero drinks espresso with his chosen last meal, which was invented in 1901. I think he died from tuberculosis. For a long time a major cause of death has been tuberculosis. So much so that Victorians made it a beauty standard. A major inspiration of Poe himself was tuberculosis, in the masque of red death, along with the grief he was left with after his wife died from it. It rots your lungs, makes you cough up your bloodied respiratory system until you suffocate in it. In the maze, prospero says he felt queasy, like something was crawling under his skin when he died. When prospero cuts his hand, he says he’s going to be sick, and tells Annabel that he’s afraid of blood. (Probably specifically his own blood bc u know he was feeding people to rats like minutes before that) This, coupled with the imagery of blood pouring out from his plague mask when he says the “queasy, like something was crawling under my skin” line, makes me think his death involved a lot of blood! And as I said before tuberculosis was like really gross and bloody and gory. Furthermore, this quote from the writer is SO interesting

In the poem prosperos namesake is in, the masque of red death, the prince prospero, hiding and ignoring a sickness ravaging his country, decides to host a huge party! Everyone’s having a grand old time, the festivities only pausing when the clock strikes, leaving everyone in a dread filled silence, the party picking up almost immediately after and brushing it off. Eventually the plague does get in though and kill them all because they ignored the feeling of dread.

The prince and the party goers die because the prince is blissfully and willfully ignorant of the disease. Bc their hubris didn’t allow them to see the threat of it. Nevermores prospero, however, is obsessed with staying healthy/hygienic as possible. He wears his gloves even when he eats, hates being touched, almost throws up when he cuts his hand. He hallucinates a thousand dirty hands grabbing him and trying to perform an operation on him with disgusting germy tools. He sees the hand he cut amputated, imagining that the wound got so infected that it had to be removed. He stares in horror at his hand before Ada even makes eye contact with him. My theory is Prospero grew up hearing terrible stories of people dying from infection, disease. He heard of people slowly drowning in their own blood. He decided to take every precaution, he simply wouldn’t allow that to be his fate. After Ada attacks him he tells Annabel “you must think me neurotic” for being so upset over the blood on his hand. This feels, so specific and intentional to me. Not just because Annabel dealt with her anxiety and her dad treating her panic attacks like he did, and this is a whole “omg look they’re bonding” moment, but bc, immediately after he tries to assure her that “im not, you know, im perfectly sane” like shit like this has happened before, where ppl called him neurotic for being that sick at the sight of his own blood, or that obsessed with hygiene. The irony being that, he spent his life obsessing over staying healthy, so much so that people called him neurotic, only to die that slow gory death anyway.

That whole, prospero dying from tb tangent aside tho, how it correlates to the time of his death. He probably died in the early 1900s, the earliest being 1901-1906ish, bc again, that’s when espresso started gaining popularity. My guess is he died around the 20s, ik the tb vaccine came out around the 20s, but people still died of it after and are still dying/contracting it today, and in the 20s there were a lot of Italians emigrating to America, and prospero is so aggressively Italian American (eating espresso and cannoli with chocolate chips for his last meal) that it’d make sense. So woo!

Monty - 1910s

Monty is a cowwwwboyyyyyy. The Wild West pretty much tapered out around the early 1900s. He can’t be that recent. He also mentions calamity Jane so that definitely puts him past the 1800s. He seemed to have a pretty wild life, kicked in the head by a horse, tooth knocked out by a human, tied to train tracks and left for dead after calling the pastors daughter loose. crazy guy crazy time

Will ???

Will is so plain i cannot get a read on where hes from im sorry

obligatory thank you for making it to the end, I barely made it myself, this was sitting in my drafts for weeks before I decided to just get it over with. <<333

[apprenticestanheight]

THE FIVE DAYS OF SMUTMAS QUEUE: DAY TWO

Work Shirts - Lawrence Gordon x gn! reader

All right!! This is day two of my silly little christmas celebration, and of course I had to do what I've been procrastinating since basically the start of this account--write a Lawrence reader insert piece!

I love him wholeheartedly despite my lack of fics for him so this has definitely been a long time coming, and this one, much like yesterdays fic, stems from a thought I had—though with this thought, @mrkheartffmans and I went a lil feral together through the reblogs of the original post and thus, the fic concept came to light!

This is also a few years post trap because I was like "yeah working somewhere for a decade is cool but what about a decade and a half??" also—my mentality was that having it set a few years post-trap would be easier to write?? I don't know how true that actually is but it was my thought process lol.

This fic is for audiences of 18+, so minors, do not interact!

Fic type- this is mostly--almost entirely--smut. There's also angst if you squint because yeah, angst was bound to be present somewhere lol

Warnings- unprotected sex (reader is on BC), and as per usual, the reader is GN for all intents and purposes (petnames included), but I went with AFAB anatomy as that's the anatomy that I know best.

Lawrence wishes he could act like the surprise on the faces of his coworkers when he mentioned having the last two weeks of December off came as a surprise to him, but he can't and he kind of hates that.

Of course people are bound to be a little surprised by it. In the decade and a half that he's worked at Angels of Mercy, the only incident where he took any sizeable amount of time off was while he was recovering from the bathroom trap and could hardly stand, let alone walk like he used to.

But, in the three years since the bathroom trap and aside from that month long period where he allowed himself to recover before going back to work, he'd not taken a single day away. Being at work, seeing to patients and talking to people—even just going to work and filling out miscellaneous paperwork while he sat in the isolation of his office—kept his mind busy and his hands busier.

He came home from work every night and saw you, which just made his entire day as it were. You'd order food or make something quick and just spend your time lounging on the couch, occasionally get a little flirty, and laugh when Lawrences hands started wandering how they used to in the days of your masters degree and his days of medical school.

But, because of a backlog of PTO and the fact that he'd been overworking himself almost to the bone with the onslaught of people needing medical care during the last three months of the year, Lawrence decided to book the 14th through to the 2nd of January off so that he could get some rest and worry about housework so that you didn't have to worry at all, where you normally split the housework fifty-fifty.

Lawrence knew that your marketing job got really, really stressful during the last month of the year. People always unearthed different versions of themselves come the holidays, and all he wanted was for you to come home from your workday and not have to worry about menial things like a messy bathroom counter, week-old leftovers in need of throwing away or dishes not yet moved from the dishwasher to the cupboards.

He gets called into work for an emergency on the 21st, and after running to grab groceries during the afternoon on the 22nd, he's delighted to find what he does waiting for him in the bed you share.

You're typically home from work at around seven, sometimes eight thirty on particularly busy days, and when Lawrence arrives home, it's half past eight.

He goes into your bedroom, having indeed hoped to see you there or at least get a call about work running late with the promise of more details upon your arrival at home as he enters your shared bedroom, but what he sees is so much better than anything he could've hoped for.

You're sitting on the bed, back pressed against the head board, focused on whatever romance book you'd plucked from a charity bookstore on your way home, but it's not what you're reading that Lawrence really takes note of.

No, it's not the book at all, though he does note that the title makes it seem like something from either the regency or the victorian era. It's what you're wearing.

You're wearing the shirt he wore to work the previous day, buttons undone with the cufflinks you'd gifted him for christmas the year his residency ended still holding the sleeves of the shirt together, the duvet covering your legs and hips, which makes Lawrence assume you've stolen a pair of his sweatpants in addition to the shirt.

He knocks, lightly, on the side of the door, and you startle, looking up to the source of the knock and relaxing the minute you see his face.

"You startled me," you say, grinning and closing your book over your thumb so as not to lose your place. "I remember you told me you'd be getting groceries around when I would get home, so I stole one of your shirts and settled in. Figured we could order Thai food or something to that effect, have a late dinner and relax."

Lawrence runs his tongue over his lips, notices the keen way with which you watch him do it.

"Yeah," he grins, further enters the room. "That sounds lovely. I grabbed the last of the necessary ingredients for dinner Christmas Day so that you wouldn't have to worry—I know that work has been something of a mess for you lately and I want to make sure you have the opportunity to relax when you come home."

He approaches the bed, watches you place the book you'd been reading open on your nightstand beneath the lamp.

"I don't deserve you," you laugh.

You've been dating since you were starting up with your masters a year after getting your bachelors degree when you were twenty-three and Lawrence was two years into medical school at twenty-four.

You've been married since you were twenty-five and twenty-six, and seventeen years down the line, you both knew that marrying each other was the best possible thing either of you could've done with regard to the romantic part of your lives, and while you were married you ended up doing the best possible things for your respective careers so it worked in both of your favors regardless.

You were Lawrences rock, especially so in the aftermath of the bathroom trap, and he was yours and would be such forevermore.

"You're right," he says, moving away from the bed to grab a pair of sweatpants. "You deserve more, but I do strive to be what you deserve day in and day out."

"Don't say that," you chide. "You're perfect, Lawrence. I wouldn't've married you had I thought otherwise, I promise."

He can feel your gaze on him as he slips out of the khaki pants he wears, deciding to go commando and put a pair of light gray sweatpants on for comfort. He changes out of the black button up he'd chosen to wear, pulls a baggy dark blue Henley over his torso and climbs into bed beside you, pressing kiss after kiss down the line of your jaw and across your neck.

"How stressful has work been?" He asks, tone genuine but also slightly seductive.

"Oh, so stressful," you laugh, knowing exactly what he's doing and the fact that seeing you in one of his shirts and just one of his shirts has spurred that on by a mile. "I think if I have to hear one more coworker complaining about last minute shopping during the last few days before Christmas Eve or even on Christmas Eve in and of itself, I will start causing heads to roll. December is the worst time to be in the offices because everyone stops caring about year-end quotas and making sure things are good going into next year and starts caring about whatever gossip is being spread around. It's dreadful, Lawrence."

He pauses, looking at you with genuine sympathy in his gaze. "I'm sorry—I feel gross. I didn't mean to attempt to proposition you for sex like that. I really do want to hear about your day and I'm sorry it's been so terrible, my love. Are you going to book time off?"

You grin. Lawrence is ever-so considerate, always apologizing and stepping back if he's done something in a way that he doesn't appreciate midway through.

"You're going to be stuck with me from tomorrow through to the second," you say. "And—for the record, I didn't hate it. I like it when you proposition me for sex with kisses because your kisses are quite honestly one of the best parts of being married to you. Plus, I have had a stressful month and I won't lie and say that my current outfitting was just for comfort. Sure, bare ass on satin sheets is an amazing feeling, but I was hoping that I'd get the reaction I did, admittedly."

Lawrence tilts his head inquisitively. "You're not—you're—I thought you'd taken a pair of my sweatpants," he grins, moves a hand to your thigh. Sure enough, it's bare. "Oh, Christmas must've come early."

You laugh. "You fuckin' wish," you say, ignoring the goosebumps that Lawrences touch brings on.

You unbutton the few buttons done up on the shirt, press your back against the headboard.

"Stressful month, yeah baby?" Lawrence is almost beaming as his hand moves from your thigh to your stomach, lazily perusing up your chest.

You clench your jaw, squeeze your arms against your sides because you are not going to give in to your handsome husband and his illustrious whims just with a few touches and some whispered sentiments.

"So stressful, Lawrence," you nod. "So, so stressful."

"Do you need a way to destress?" His thumb and first finger locate your nipple, and you exhale a breathy moan, quiet and already wanting to give in to his whims. "If you do, I think I could be of assistance."

"Lawrence," you moan, quiet and needy. "Oh, fuck, Lawrence."

Lawrence moves his hand away from you for a second, only to take off his shirt and the sweatpants he wears before he's back to kissing your neck and letting his hands roam across your chest.

A few minutes of much the same passes by, Lawrences kisses lining your neck and jawline and face and your ethereal lips while he rolls your nipples between his fingers. His hand dips to your folds for just a few minutes, taking your slick onto his fingers and laughing against your shoulder.

"You're so wet for me already," he says. "Fuck, you're perfect."

"Wanna ride you," you're almost stunned at how evenly the words fall from your lips but not at all stunned when Lawrence agrees.

He pulls you onto his lap, lets you grind against his half-hard cock until it's fully hard and you're begging to feel him inside of you and moans when you bottom out, gaze watching you intently as his hands settle on your hips.

"Lawrence," you whisper. "Fuck."

A smile spreads onto Lawrences face before he can stop it, and when you start riding him, he presses his back against the headboard, one hand on your hip while the other lightly holds your chin so as to keep your gaze on his.

You get lost in how good it feels within the space of a minute, maybe two—Lawrence's cock is long and thick, and even if riding it takes some adjusting occasionally, it still becomes very enjoyable very quickly.

"You're so wonderful for me, Y/N," he says. "Oh, this never gets old."

He's loving how you feel around him, clenching occasionally and moaning after a particularly deep thrust that hits your g-spot, and you're just—it's just perfect.

And then, Lawrence gets an idea. He moves the hand that's cupping your face to your wrist, which is attached to the hand that you use to grope relentlessly at yourself, rolling your nipples between your thumb and first finger, sometimes moving to rub your clit.

"The cufflinks, baby," he says. "Don't touch yourself, mm? Use those for me."

He watches you press the cold silver cufflink against one of your nipples, moans as you clench around him at the sensation of the cold meeting your warm skin. You moan in turn, pressing the metal against your nipples and moaning his name.

He moves a hand back to your chin, placing his first and middle finger against your bottom lip. You take the hint immediately and bring his fingers into your mouth, grinding down onto him as you do.

"You're so good for me, pet," he says, moving the hand that rests on your hip to your clit. He starts rubbing it with practiced expertise, knowing the way you like it best after nearly two decades of marriage. "Oh, this is amazing. You can steal my work shirts whenever you want, okay? Especially the ones with the cufflinks. You're amazing."

You moan at the praise, pressing the cufflinks against yourself further, loving the way that the metal feels against your sensitive nipples.

He takes his fingers out of your mouth and goes back to holding your chin so as to keep your gaze on his, wanting to watch you orgasm.

You come completely undone when Lawrence speeds up his ministrations on your clit just enough to make you want more, and Lawrence watches.

You thrust your way through the aftershocks, at which point Lawrence releases into you and lets your chin free from his light grip, kissing you and offering praise as he does.

He pulls you off of him and gets a bath set up, helping you into it while giving you more praise and pressing kisses along the back of your neck and shoulder blades because the orgasm had left you both completely and totally breathless.

You bathe in light conversation, once again talking about your days but focusing on the more positive parts, and Lawrence lets you steal a Henley from the days of medical school. You pull a pair of boxers on and curl up in bed next to him, falling asleep only seconds before Lawrence does.

[kkami-writes]

hey guys!! long time no talk......here's a little life update!

so as you remember I got a job at the beginning of novemeber! while kinda stressful and hectic I really enjoyed working with the dogs and was happy even if i didn't have as much time for other things. December took a bit of a rough turn with seasonal depression and just feeling no motivation for really much of anything. For context for years I've never really had amazing birthdays, I've been disappointed, upset or just alone on my birthdays and I've long lost the excitement of my birthday. This year, I took a trip to Orange County/LA to visit family. We had planned on doing an escape room (something I've only done once but enjoyed but with my anxiety the thought of being locked in a room freaks me out). my cousins bf however booked a saw themed room. for those of you who don't know. I hate horror. ok, I digress. sometimes I can watch horror. but i mostly more enjoy horror video games but even then I do NOT play them for the most part. And if I do I usually have to take a break bc my anxiety spikes. In years I have gotten better at dealing with it, but in general horror movies specifically trigger me pretty badly. And prior to this, my anxiety had been out of control, constant anxiety and panic attacks that I didn't think I was even going to make it on my trip. So needless to say I was upset. Because I was looking forward to doing an escape room, I enjoy puzzles and thinking but that being said I would never ever do a horror themed escape room. I felt bad because I couldn't do it and they had already paid and it was about an hour before we had to leave. (thank god I asked what the theme of the room was before we got there). anyway, with all my emotions that I had been piling up in me, I just had a bad breakdown and cried. They all ended up going bc again, didn't want to waste money and I just wanted to be alone at that point anyway. Regardless, I still had a good time on the trip, "minor" bump aside. We went to little tokyo and I got to go to designer con for a bit. ALSO I love my cousins bf, he's a really nice guy. He did not know I don't do horror so it's not his fault. In his defense it was more supposed to be horror comedy / parody but I was already very highly anxious that even that would freak me out.

With my job, the original owners of the daycare had sold it, due to personal circumstances so we were getting a whole new owner. Except that a lot of us did not agree with things they were going to be adding or the way they interacted with the dogs. They have "nap time" which is literally just them crating all the dogs for almost 2 whole hours. Not all the dogs are crate trained and needless to say, did not enjoy it. When we tried it a few times it was just non stop barking for 2 hours. It was heartbreaking and sad. Literally everyone but two people have quit and decided they would not be working with these new people who clearly don't really care about the dogs. It's all about how to make the most money. The new owners don't even HAVE a dog. It's kinda crazy. So that being said...I have also decided to leave as I just don't feel comfortable there anymore. Which is heartbreaking because even though it's been two months, I've really bonded with these dogs and love them and it feels like I've left them to fend for themselves :/ anyway, I don't want to keep rambling on and on. but basically! i'm on the hunt for a new job and still struggling a bit with motivation and my mood, but i'm still hoping to return back to writing in january. I miss you guys a lot and have missed writing. I'm gonna answer all my asks soon. Thanks <3

[lnights]

At the beginning of 2023, I saw a challenge called The Year Of The OTP: 12 prompts. 12 months. One ship. I chose BC/BC because I write One Thing™️

Some are short one shots, some are multi chapters, two are pure smut 😌 links and summaries below.

January: Snow

Prompt: Snow, Rating G.

Summary:

He puffed out, smoke mingling with the steam of his hot breath as he tilted his head back, watching the softly falling snow.

February: Valentine's Day

Prompts: Valentine's Day and established relationship/long distance. Rating E.

Summary:

Their Valentine's Day plans were interrupted by bad weather. That's not going to stop them.

March: Fresh Starts

Prompt: Fresh Starts. Rating M. Angel/Demon au, sequel to Long Way Down

Summary:

The elders had always said falling was the most painful thing that could happen to an angel. As Tommi had hit the water and felt bones breaking he could only think they had been correct, pain shooting through every nerve endings and as he slowly sank he wondered how he was even still alive, being quite literally tossed from one realm of existence to another was like falling from a plane without a parachute.

April: Painting you Blue

Prompt: University AU. Rating G. 5 chapters.

Summary:

but still… he was a teacher now. What the hell had he gotten himself into? He should have never let Niko and Joonas talk him into this Or Joel is a new teacher at the same university as his boyfriends and their good friends. He is not excited.

May: Flower Moon

Prompt: Flower language. Rating G. Part of my Wolfpack AU.

Summary:

Aleksi is learning a new wolf tradition and wants to surprise his mates.

June: Can You Hear the Silence Getting Loud?

Prompts: Soulmates. Rating M. 5 chapters, part of my Soulmate AU

Summary:

For years Aleksi has been happy with his soulmates, his family long cut off. Until a relative contacting him makes him question that choice.

July: Heaven (and Hell) on Earth

Prompts: Enemies to Lovers and Coffeeshop AU. Rating M. 5 chapters. Angel/Demon AU

Summary:

There were two men running the counter as he got there, looking at him with what could almost be called suspicion. One was tall, even taller than him, and muscly, while the other was rather short with curly honey colored hair. "Welcome," the shorter of the two said, "what can we get you this evening?" "Your strongest, largest espresso," Joel said bluntly. His insomnia had decided to kick his ass that night, at least he could try to stay awake and be productive rather than be in his half awake, half asleep zombie mode that it usually sent him into. The larger man chuckled a little and got to work on the drink while the smaller rang him up; there was something about them that kept Joel's attention on them, something about the shop that begged for his attention. Maybe it was the name, Sinful Coffee.

August: Weathering the Storm

Prompt: Storm. Rating T.

Summary:

Blind Channel and their crew gets stuck at an airport in their hectic tour schedule. Joel and Niko don't handle it well.

September: Beacon in a Storm

Prompts: hurt comfort, meeting the family, flood, shifter au. Rating T.

Summary:

Olli stared through the dark window of their home, trying to not panic. The rain was getting impossibly heavier and Joel and Aleksi still weren't back; the dirt road leading to town had to be flooded by now, they could be stuck in mud or washed away if they weren't careful. "We never should have sent them by themselves." Joonas mumbled, "we should have gone with."

October: Pop Princess, Hold My Hand

Prompts: Texting, couple costumes. Rating T.

Summary:

It's Joonas' turn to pick their Halloween costumes.

November: Be Careful What You Wish For

Prompt: Be Careful What You Wish For. Rating E.

Summary:

Tommi decides to show his boyfriends a new side of him

December: Opinion on the Season

Prompt: Holidays together. Rating G. Stand alone sequel to Rumors and Opinions.

Summary:

Niko sighed and exhaled the smoke from his lungs. Holidays were always an interesting time of year. They all had a lot of family to see and it could be a tad overwhelming; seeing so many relatives in a short period, let alone all the shopping they had to do, arranging travel, arguments over who's family home they will wake up in on Christmas morning…

[milo-is-rambling]

I have the watch party for the recording of the last play I worked but I’ve been ghosting 💨 and I’m gonna see 💨 and 🗿 today like in front of all these ppl and I’m so anxious about it and I’m trying to be normal but I can’t decide if I should tell her like. “Yeah December just was crazy and the grief and the stress and then January has been crazy too.” Or should I be like. “My family doesn’t trust you. You’ve literally been hanging out with me and then randomly said “ah….. I’m a bad friend.” And then continued acting the exact same way. HELLO? also 💨 was the one who brought the whole 41 year old man thing into my life and also left him at MY HOUSE alone with me for like. Hours. with no way to kick him out bc her boyfriend was his ride and they drove somewhere like two hours away while leaving him with me in my bed. HELLO? also 41 year old man stole my dab pen and a blanket from my house and she’s acting like she had no idea but like girl. You didn’t tell me about the blanket for like weeks even tho I know for sure you saw his ass getting in and out of ur boyfriends car with the blanket from my house and you didn’t say ANYTHING??? And there’s the time weed went missing from my house after you came over. Like my mom and brother are convinced you’re stealing from us and I can’t even defend you bc i don’t even know if I can trust you anymore and I’ve been doing so much better since I completely detached from your batshit crazy life and your boy drama and your boys baby mama drama” Ughhhhhhhhhh. But I’m so scared of confrontation and I don’t want to have grudges and bad vibes between me and people from theater esp not ppl from theater who I know smoke weed and accepted me into their little friend group but ugh and it’s so extra bad bc 🗿 doesn’t really know about half of the drama with 💨 so I can’t even like talk to someone outside of my family to get a third party opinion and I’m just like losing my minddddddd and idk what to do and the watch party is at five tonight and I want to throw uppppp

[ropebunnykant]

2023 in Review: Meta Edition

rules: link your top and/or favorite posts/metas/gifs for each month of 2023

tagged by @chickenstrangers and i def would not have thought to do this otherwise but now i really love the idea skhdfdsjhf

January

I wrote a total of one (1) analysis post in January and it was right after my rewatch of The Eclipse and it was this post on the Suppalo pin symbolism. still drives me crazy tbh.

February

top: In Defense of Jim which was in response to an anon hating on jim and me tearing them to shreds + discussing how mlc is about flawed people and that's the whole point

favorite: this akkayan post that was inspired by my own tags on @freensrcha's gifset sdjkfsd it only got like 12 notes but i love my boy

honorable mentions: these aren't meta, but february was when i made the aita jim post and when this post about alan broke containment badly. also my the first girlies are struggling post bc that was one of my funniest moments

March

top: the pen metaphor about alan asking for his pen back from jim vs almost letting gaipa take it

favorite: these two sets of tags on this post from the beginning of the eclipse and me needing to break my tag essay about reflecting on it from having finished the show into two sets of tags skjdfsdhf

April

No meta in April!

May

top & favorite: "anything about me can wait" as a thesis for akk as a character

June

Yet another month where I only wrote one (1) analysis post, but it was a good one - this post on the p'aof giving wen agency by asking him directly if he wants him to relight the flame between him and alan

July

no bl analysis this month but i did make one yellowjackets post briefly talking about the burning of jackie in her yellowjackets jacket and now i feel like i need to make that a longer post skjdfdsk

August

only friends started this month, so we've got a lot to work with skjfhsdf

top: this post further breaking down the "you're gonna keep wanting me line" and how it's also about how quickly sand was learning ray

favorite: a tie between this post about how much sand cares and this post about sand and control

September

top: this post about ray and how he's clumsy with love in response to an anon - very much a contender for favorite as well

favorite: tie between sand as a glutton for punishment + sand and his mom

October

top: this sand analysis which was also a contender for favorite

favorite: decided on this post about top's pov in ep9 bc there were NOT enough posts analyzing the povs

November

top: me breaking down over akkayan's first kiss for the millionth time

favorite: this post paired with this post which is basically just me being pissed at a LACK of analysis coming from everyone that was mad about the ending of only friends and me breaking down a few of the dumb arguments i'd seen sdkjdsfh

December

No meta in December!

tagging: anyone that wants to cause i have no idea who's done this by now skjdfsdfh

[explosionshark]

3 and 25

3. What were your top five books of the year?

Alright HERE'S where I'm gonna answer for series - I already had a separate answer for standalone books

1. The Golden Enclaves by Naomi Novik (Scholomance #3) - LOVED this conclusion to the Scholomance trilogy. I read books 1 and 2 during December 2022 and did 3 in the first week of January and it was one of the most satisfying conclusions to a series I've ever read. And I'm NOT just saying that bc it's the book where most of the gay shit happens. Leaving the school and having the world open up so much felt so good. I love Orion but having him out of the way for most of the book felt like a good choice to me - it made a lot of room for El's relationships with other characters and the role she decides to take on in the fight against mals. I remember at some point while I was reading the earlier books skimming past some essay or other identifying the Scholomance as like a climate change metaphor and being so puzzled by it - and then getting to the end of Golden Enclaves and being like OHHHH. YEAH. I GET IT.

2. Jade Legacy by Fonda Lee (Green Bone Saga #3) - AGAIN talk about satisfying conclusions. I know some people didn't like this book as much especially bc of issues they have with Hilo at the beginning but to me it all felt in character and didn't diminish anything about my enjoyment. I enjoy how often Lee takes the time to remind the audience that the characters are flawed and sometimes petty or foolish or cruel, even while you root for them. The scale of this book surprised me - SO much time passes, the characters and the world all change so much. I was genuinely shocked by some of the things that happened in this book. I've still got Jade Shards and The Jade Setter of Janloon to go, but man am I gonna be sad to say goodbye to this setting (at least for a while). Absolutely one of my all-time favorite fantasy series of all time now.

3. The Traitor by Anthony Ryan (Covenant of Steel #3) - honestly this could be any of the Covenant of Steel books. I just finished The Traitor this past weekend but this isn't a recency bias thing - I read The Pariah and The Martyr back to back in August. There's something I really love about Ryan's style - his characters are fucked up but compelling, his worlds feel accessible but still like they have depth and intricacy. I love his Seven Swords novellas and I'm constantly trying to get people to read them bc I think they're a great way to get a taste for his strengths as a writer and hopefully enough to whet your appetite for a more complex, in depth series like Covenant. The books are detailed and they definitely have some parts that can drag a little - but when you DO get hooked they're just propulsive. Super compelling low fantasy that builds and builds in really interesting ways. Great characters.

4. Before They are Hanged by Joe Abercrombie (First Law Book #2) - alright First Law is like TRUE grimdark. Seriously - the end of the final book was extremely brutal. Which is why book 2 ended up being my favorite of the first trilogy, actually. Before They are Hanged is the most straightforward adventure story of the bunch and it has a relatively optimistic ending. There are still gruesome and brutal things happening on the page (and frequently!) but there's such a strong sense of momentum building. The character work for Jezal in this book is so damn good - Abercrombie got me to do a full 180 on him here. (And a 360 by the third book lmao). Abercrombie is a masterful writer, the dark humor running through the story helps keep it readable when things get very bleak.

5. The Justice of Kings by Richard Swan (Empire of the Wolf #1) - another grimdark fantasy that whips ass tbh. Really great low fantasy setting. Something I really enjoyed in Empire of the Wolf books AND in the Covenant of Steel is the conflict between state power and religious power and how the people losing the most are the commons in the middle. Justice of Kings sets this up beautifully - I loved the way it slowly zooms out to this larger world-altering conflict after beginning the story as a sort of medieval fantasy murder-mystery. I also think the magic system is so cool and scary. The atmosphere in this book was incredible too - even just thinking back on it makes everything feel miserable and wet and tense despite the fact that as I write this it's kind of picturesquely sunny with white fluffy clouds outside for me. (I DO have to finish the follow-up book Tyranny of Faith, but I think I'll probably pull that off in January next year tbh)

25. What reading goals do you have for next year?

I wanna continue on with more series! And I want to keep challenging myself with long books. I got some Tad Williams stuff in a humble bundle earlier this year, so I'm thinking of taking on Memory Sorrow and Thorn next year as a way to satisfy this desire. A little intimidated by the length but I think it could end up being v rewarding.

End of Year Book Asks

[i-am-church-the-cat]

church what beef do you have with tennessee’s coach

Okay so what i'm about to say does not leave this website agreed? cool

so let's say that hypothetically, there's this guy that was the head coach of a football team. one of the guys coaching under him was a college football player, a professional football player, and was now trying out coaching but it wasn't going the best. now this guy - let's call him CD, for no particular reason - has a wife and four kids, so he and his wife decide that they're only going to do this coaching thing for three years from 2017-2020 to see if it'll work. CD starts working for this head coach - let's call him JH, again, for no particular reason - in 2018, right?

for the first couple of seasons, it's going cool. CD loves it here, CD's family (🙋🏽) loves it there, and the team isn't doing that badly. but, they're not doing that great 2019 season, and THEN, a pandemic hits

now let me tell you a bit about American football schedules, if you don't already know. games are played from late august to november, with preseason games in july/early august and postseason in december. conditioning happens during the summer so recruiting and all preseason planning happens in the march-april gap. most of the time, football teams have their coaching staff in place by february at the latest

why is this important? well, at the end of the 2020 season, JH and the team management are no longer meshing and there's talks about him leaving. his entire staff, including CD, is like "hey, if you're leaving let us know so we can start looking for new jobs". JH is like "ofc nbd will do"

well post-season ends and there's no news. the dawn of 2021 comes and there's no news. january AND february pass, and there's no news

huh, that's so weird, i wonder what's happening-

*ESPN BREAKING NEWS ALERT* [redacted] University's head coach, JH, has signed with the Tennessee Volunteers!

hypothetically, let's say that your boss avoids and lies to you for MONTHS, puts your job security, your family's financial security, and the security of all of your coworkers' at risk, and then you find out from a ESPN. not even from the man himself but E. S. P. N.

would you be upset? maybe just a little?

and then after that, let's say JH now gets to choose whoever he wants to come with him to Tennessee. what if he then, took only half of the organization (the offensive half cause go figure, he was an offensive coach) and left the other half (the defensive half, aka the half CD works on) to fend for themselves

and then, what if you, watching this all happen to your father, now have to pack up and move in the middle of a GLOBAL PANDEMIC bc your dad had to go back to the job he got his degree for bc it was more financially stable? would you be upset? would you blame someone for that happening maybe?

also he took Mackenzie Milton from me and I will never forgive him. so yeah, that's my beef with the Tennessee head coach

[hoonvrs]

Needing some help fr

So this guy and I used to like each other for a while and then three years ago we dated for like a year but because of school and extra stuff, we broke up. but he was like still interested in me and I lowkey was but idk we both still talked to other people during those three years after we broke up.

one of the people he spoke to was one of current closest friends and she didn’t tell me that they liked each other until like January this year which is understandable because we haven’t been close since sept last year and like I kinda get why she’d feel like she doesn’t need to tell me - since me and him haven’t really spoken. also, yes they liked each other but ar different times so when she confessed to him, he had already stopped liking her bc he’s always like had a big thing for me apparently.

but here’s where things get messy lol so yk how she told me in January that she likes him (even tho he rejected her) yeah I had just added him back in December and we were like talking.

but after finding out she was like upset over what happened w him I distanced with him. anddd this might be where I messed up but after a few weeks she updated me and said she’s over him blah blah and idk how but naturally him and I started tlaking again.

And then a few weeks ago like he told me he likes me and stuff and I was like damn well like I do as well but I don’t wanna do this to my friend so I decide to speak to her before things got too complicated and I didn’t wanna do anything behind her back.

I told her and we spoke about it - she was really mature and said how she’s over him but the only thing is that she felt like I was hiding it which ofc she didn’t appreciate. And I explained my side but also apologised because I know it’s still wrong to hide it even if we were talking “as friends”.

but nowwwww idk I feel like shes harbouring some feelings against me? I feel like it’s reasonable but at the same time I have no clue so I need an outsider opinion

i mean if she says she’s fine with it and her only problem was u hiding it from her which technically she did at the same time cause she didn’t know u liked him at one point so that whole thing is kinda pointless

but other than that it’s really out of your hands she was mature about it and you told her everything so there’s nothing more you can do. if she has some harbouring feeling that she’s keeping to herself then that’s a her problem entirely so unless she admits it then it just seems like you’ve been overthinking this a bit so i wouldn’t worry

[nicotinzwei]

January

no december sorry too much

Movie

I know it's overhyped but I genuinely loved Saltburn. I loved the narrative, I loved that we dont have a typiscal protagonist, I love unreliable narrators. And sure I'm a fan of campy shots. The combination of this fancy manor and 2000s fashion just does it for me. Some people think the scenes are gross, others were expecting worse. I don't think they are even supposed to be gross yall are just boring and watch boring movies. Mybe drinking cum bathwater is a nice metaphor. Maybe im gay.

Book

This is so embarassing. When I was a kid I was a big HP Fan. And I kind of distanced myself from the whole fandom with JKR and also bc im not 13 and a Ravenclaw anymore. But ... The marauder stuff finally got to me. I got some comments on tiktok that i have lupin vibes and my Pinterest started recomending content. So I'm reading All the Young Dudes now. I never read fanfiction before except for like some smut. So I was just scanning the chapters at first because I'm impatient. But on my work trip I started the audiobook. The story is super slow but (oh god I hat this) it feels nice to be back in this universe. Brb about to shift to my dog boyfriend.

Place

Another favorite is just randomly deciding to work from our Berlin office for a week because my best friend lives there. Berlin is kind of weird, stragers look a you and talk to you. Theres a lot of people with flowers on public transport and a lot of boken glass. The garbage people are loud. It's nice to get out sometime. Also love to join two men cuddling in bed (mattress on floor).

[glowinggreenfrog]

I went to see an allergenist bc of severe asthma symptoms I was having, and we found out I had unusually strong reaction to the prick tests (like extreme inflammation on the bottom portion of the affected limb but barely any symptoms besides localized swelling). Like only blowed my nose once, while I had a level 25 eruption. She said I was “interesting”, which if you already have one auto immune disease (type 1 diabetes) you know that’s not good.

She left me with an asthma pump, and allergy pills and I started researching what interesting means, and my symptoms that could leave me with so much inflammation. She repeatedly told me to please come back for a second follow-up. She wrote it down after I said I have memory issues.

I already had hair loss, and trouble breathing. I remember after my asthma attacks, I told the GP doctor, I had a rash over my sinus area. I drew it, he said it was sinitus, but my nose was clear. I had sun sensitivity since I was 18. I remember him being mean to me as I repeatedly said “I can breathe fine, my nose isn’t blocked and I don’t feel congested. I can’t take deep breaths.”

I paid closer attention to my body. I have milia under my eye. And a red spot on both my cheeks, and I can press on it to change color.its more obvious after a shower, or if it’s cold, it goes back to the shape I mentioned to the doctor. I have been having pain on and off all mid December to January. Previously it was more sporadic. It was ass because I was avoiding drawing as much as possible to not trigger it, and I got it anyway.

So I got covid for the first time in this period (bf passed it from a coworker) and that oddly didn’t affect me too much. But I’m used to coughing after being sick, I got a mini orange pump. I was using the blue inhaler twice a day at that point, the orange cut it completely.

I decided to call a dermatologist for the hair and skin since that is constant. Then it went to shit . Not only in my hands, my ankles and my non dominant hand. I had a stressful event and it went full out. My elbow hurt. My hand swole to twice the size at work. I couldn’t close my fist. Wtf did I touch? Apparently nothing, they use UV lights at work.

It would continue going downhill from there. Joint paint, swollen hands, swollen lymph nodes, swollen face and limbs and joint pain. I could see my lymph nodes?! My endo checks every visit and here it is, so obvious in a photo. And the most damning: a swollen rash. I looked it up, the shape I drew, it was a butterfly rash. Again.

I am 99% sure I have lupus. I called on Thursday before the swelling to ask about an appointment again but for my wrists because I couldn’t even lift cardboard. Again, and still haven’t received a call back. Hospitals are full right now, and I only have a low grade fever.

So odd to know you have something you’ll never be able to shake off, but you can’t get help for it immediately, because you’re not in organ failure, thanks to the time I went to get an asthma pump. I can think thanks to the asthma pump better, after the attacks until I got the pump, it was hard to be coherent.

My issue is, my orange pump is running out and I’m taking it longer than the prescribed amount because it’s stops me from using the blue twice a day. I don’t have a refill. I haven’t gotten chest pains since using it. My lungs feel more sheltered. I feel like a bomb. I hope I get a call back soon. I started coughing again if I talk a lot.

[auroracalisto]

for the first time

summary: the reader finally sees her life in a new point of view, thanks to carlisle, who has helped her with her abusive husband, her baby girl luna, and her life in general.  

pairing: carlisle x female! married/widowed! abused! reader

word count: 1.6k words

warnings: female reader, married and eventually widowed reader, reader is abused by her husband, reader has the surname Wolf in this bc comedic reasons, reader has a child named Luna by said husband, mentions of murder, no depictions but carlisle definitely did the stabby stab (at least if that’s what you wanna assume he did), uhhh reader got them widow benefits by the end but that’s a story for another time, ALSO for some reason i put this in the year 2005 and it goes on to 2006/2007?  so this would technically be the same timeline as bella and edward meeting.  so first movie.  yes.  i love the technicalities of everything.  honestly didn’t mean for it to happen but it did so 

a/n: i have no words

Carlisle first had the honor of meeting you at your then-husband’s Christmas party.  It was December 20th, 2005.  Your child was most definitely due by the end of January.  You were quite literally glowing, and Carlisle believed you were the most beautiful thing he had seen in some time.  However, most of the beauty was because of your skill with makeup.  Without it, bruises galore would be revealed to the outside world, and your husband would not be too happy to find out that you showed off the newest shiner he gave to you. 

Even while pregnant, he did not care for your wellbeing.  Hell, he made it quite obvious that he would never care for the little girl growing in your midsection.  But even if he was a terrible prick, you decided to have this child.  Of course, maybe it would have been better for you to end the pregnancy early on.  However, a part of you didn’t want that.  A part of you wanted to have the baby and leave your husband.  Whichever order it came in would be fine.  But knowing now that it would be the latter made you nervous.  

The second time Carlisle saw you was in the middle of a grocery store, calming down your newborn baby.  Your husband had sent you out in the middle of February, just a month after giving birth.  You were alone, and everything was upsetting.  Your baby’s little cries caused your own tears to well up in your eyes.  

When the two of you made eye contact, you finally broke.  You didn’t want anyone to see you like that, and yet, here you were with your husband’s co-worker, crying in the middle of the bread aisle.  

“Mrs. Wolf, please.  Let me help you,” Carlisle softly said, leaving his buggy on the other side of you.  He came over, looking at your baby.  “I’ll get her to calm down.”

You took his word for it, allowing Carlisle to comfort your crying child.  “Please.  Don’t call me that.  [Your name] is fine.”

He watched you with soft eyes and nodded.  “And who is this?” he softly asked, looking down at the fussing infant.  Her eyes were shut and she never once had actual tears—one thing that never sat right with him was how babies couldn’t form tears until they were about two months old (sometimes even longer).  

“Luna,” you softly spoke, watching as your little girl started to calm down in his arms.  You sniffled softly, wiping your eyes with the back of your sleeve.  You should have been more careful, but you didn’t care at this point.  It was getting harder and harder to do this; if someone saw a bruise, someone saw a bruise.  

“That’s a beautiful name,” Carlisle spoke, looking back at you.  “She is very lucky to have you as a mother.”

By the third time Carlisle had properly talked to you, your husband had died.  Under mysterious circumstances, but he was gone.  And you couldn’t have been happier.  You had an idea of what had happened.  Especially when you once opened your eyes in the middle of the night to see a flash of blond hair.  But you drifted off back to sleep, not thinking anymore of it until the morning after when your husband was missing.  However, you never once said anything.  

Weeks after he had passed, you had hired a babysitter for the evening.  Carlisle’s two girls.  

And for once, you did not have to worry about the makeup covering your bruises.  In fact, you wore your makeup how you liked it instead of having to wear it to protect your dead husband.  You found yourself sitting in your car, in front of the hospital.  Alice had informed you that her adoptive father was currently at work—that he was constantly working, and he never once took a break.  

Maybe you should have just turned around.  Maybe you should have just left Washington, altogether.  But your legs started moving before you could stop them.  And once you saw Carlisle, you knew that you had to speak with him.  

You didn’t even have to say hello to him for the man to walk in your direction.  He smiled kindly at you, and you wanted to say something.  You desperately wanted to thank him for saving you, even if he never admitted it.  

But the words never found your tongue.  Your arms wrapped around the doctor, your face buried deep in his blue dress shirt and his white lab coat.  Carlisle had never been more grateful for not carrying his clipboard around.  He wrapped his arms around your body, holding you close.  

Although the two of you never said anything, one thing was clear; you were both grateful for each other’s existence.  Even if you lived vicariously through passing glances and thoughtful actions.  

Luna was nearly one by the time you decided enough was enough.  You were a widow, now.  You did not have to worry about what your husband would say.  And one thing was certain; the blond-haired doctor had your heart in more ways than one.  

He was so kind to you, always offering help and joyful smiles.  His conversations carried you through your long days and kept you awake at night as you thought of how you could tell him how you truly felt.  

But now, you knew enough was enough—you knew that you were not getting any younger, and neither was Carlisle (of course, because he was human—of course, you wouldn’t learn that until later).  You needed to talk to him.  You needed to take a course of action.  

You grabbed your keys, walking to your door.  Luna was babbling in her car seat.  You sat it down to get the door open, nearly jumping out of your skin when you saw Carlisle standing there, prepared to knock.  

He had a bouquet of your favorite flowers in hand and a rather awkward smile.  

“My apologies... are you going somewhere?”

Your cheeks began to burn.  You sat your keys on the table beside your door, shaking your head.  “I was going to see you, actually.”

Luna giggled up at the man when he came into her line of vision.  She adored Carlisle.  

“Oh, that makes this easier then,” he let out a soft laugh, hesitantly holding out the flowers to you.  “These are for you.  I... I had asked Alice what your favorites were.  I hope you don’t mind.”

You smiled.  “No...  No, I don’t,” you said, clearing your throat.  You moved out of the doorway so that he could come into your house.  “I was hoping that.. well, I am hoping this now.  I’ve needed to talk to you.  For a while now.  I really, really need to just get this off my chest, you know?  I just—”

“—could I be of any assistance?” he chuckled softly.  “Perhaps I can find the words that you are searching for.”

You rolled your eyes, unable to keep your smile from forming.  “Carlisle, I’ve... loved you since before my husband died.  I know that for a fact, now.  And I... hope that you feel the same way.  About myself.  And Luna.  We’re a package deal, you know.”

He chuckled softly and nodded.  “I know that you are a package deal.  I... am very glad you feel that way, too.”

“Too?”

“Yes,” Carlisle smiled at you.  “I have loved you since the first time I have set eyes on you.”

You snorted out a laugh, crossing your arms over your chest.  “That long, huh?”

He just smiled, watching you with kind, golden eyes.  “There are many things I need to tell you, [Your name],” he said, finally shutting the front door behind of him.  He looked down at Luna and got her out of the carrier, especially when she happily reached for the man.  “Perhaps we can take this evening to talk?”

You smiled, nodding.  “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, but yeah.  I’d like that.”

All of you made Carlisle’s beatless heart skip.  He could only hope that it was the opposite for you (he could definitely hear how fast your heart began to beat the closer he got to you).  Luna entertained herself with the buttons on Carlisle’s shirt while the two of you talked until she fell asleep against him.  

Perhaps it was that moment that you truly knew that you were in love with Carlisle.  No—that action only fortified your love for the man.  You knew you had loved him just as long as he had claimed to love you.  And for once, you were not afraid of what love could do. 

Because you believed you loved your deceased husband, you married him.  You slowly watched him become a horrible person.  And then you had Luna with him.  Of course, that was the one good thing that came out of him.  Perhaps the chance of meeting Carlisle as well.  

But you knew that now, the love you felt for Carlisle was as real as the infant in Carlisle’s arms.  And it would never burn like your last loveless love.  

For the first time, it felt like you were seeing yourself in a new light.  You were seeing everything from a different perspective.  And Carlisle allowed that.  Carlisle helped you find that.  

Even if he hadn’t have been there, you would have still found it.  However, you knew that he made it so much easier than it would have been.  

For the first time, you knew real love.  With Luna, and now with Carlisle.  

Despite everything that had happened to you, it seemed as though the universe was finally connecting the dots.  And you couldn’t wait to see what she was going to give you, next.