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analogwriting · 7 months ago

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The Walk-in

Killer x gn!reader (afab edition) word count: 4.2k amab vers. a/n: i got this idea from a revelation i had about how im pretty sure every walk-in in every restaurant ever has been boned in at least once. my source to site is me bc ive been working in the food industry since i was, like, 12.

“Oh my god, y/n, have you seen the new cook?” Your best friend, Wire, spoke up from behind the bar. He was currently wiping it down, preparing for the rush that would be starting soon.

You were bussing tables when he spoke up, you paused, walking over to him and tossing the rag over your shoulder. “I haven't. Isn't he a friend of the owner’s son or something?”

“Yeah. Met him in college.”

“Ah. Friend hire.” You made a face, causing Wire to laugh. He knows how much you weren't a fan of people being hired just because they knew someone who worked there - especially when it came to the owner. “They never last.” You shook your head.

“Oh, c'mon. I heard his cooking is great.”

You raised an eyebrow as you went back to wiping down tables. “Biased opinions, probably. Of course they're gonna say his cooking is great. But good cooking isn’t everything in this line or work. You and I both know that.”

Wire had a thoughtful look on his face as he nodded. “That's true.” There'd been plenty of instances where a good cook was hired, but they couldn't deal with the rush or crazy customers. None of them would last through the night. “He seems like he'll hold well.”

You snorted, standing up and folding your arms across your chest. “That's what you said about the last guy.” You rolled your eyes with a grin. The poor sap didn't last half an hour.

“I was being optimistic?” You snorted and shook your head. “Oh sure. Optimistic.”

“I'm sure he'll become overwhelmed and leave within the hour.” That was your bet. You didn't usually expect much from newcomers, especially friend hires.

“Wow, not even giving me a real shot, huh?” A deep voice came up from behind you. A shiver ran down your spine - not from fear, but from the sheer attractiveness his voice had. Oh shit.

You turned around and the air left your lungs as the most beautiful and sexy man stood behind you. You blinked, trying to find words to say but your brain wasn't fully caught up with the situation. Holy shit, this was the finest man you'd ever seen in your life.

“You must be the head server with the high expectations then.” You opened your mouth to say something - only for nothing to come out. You glared over at Wire who held his hands up in surrender with a shit eating grin on his face. He knew that this man was exactly your type and chose to retain that information.

A sly grin spread across the cook's face. “Cat got your tongue? Where'd all that barking go?”

Your eyes widened, one of them twitching. Oh, he had a mouth on him too. It was on.

Finally, your brain caught up. It'd felt like eternity, but it was only a few seconds. You folded your arms across your chest, an unimpressed look crossing your features. “I believe I am giving you a chance, just don't have high hopes. Can’t in this line of work - takes a special breed.”

You looked him up and down. Fuck, he was fine as hell. “Anyway. They say you're a good cook. The customers will be the judge of that. That's not all, however. Where most people fumble is service itself. Always ends up being too much for people - too busy.”

Then your brain circled back to what he had said earlier. “And of course I have high expectations. I only want what's best for this place and I don't need people wasting mine or my coworkers time.”

The man before you just had an amused look on his face as he watched you. That irritated the shit out of you for reasons you couldn’t specify at the moment. “Don't worry, I won't be wasting anyone's time. I assure you, I won't be going anywhere either. You better get used to me now,” he crooned, leaning in as he spoke.

Your eyes narrowed at him. You wanted to punch him in his smug little face. “I've had plenty like you, too. Big talk. Think they'll last. Usually, they're the quickest to leave. Honestly, I’m being generous with an hour.”

He chuckled, straightening back out. “We'll see when I'm still here after rush then, huh? If I stick it out, which I will, what do I get for winning the bet?”

The sheer audacity of this man. You stared at him, but didn't hesitate in your answer. “A job, duh.” You rolled your eyes. “I don't have time for this. I have a floor to prep.”

The cook laughed. It was one of the most beautiful sounds you ever heard. Damn, you must just be horny. It had been a while since you've gotten laid, but you also had a rule of never sleeping with your coworkers. You didn't knock others for doing it, you just didn't personally. You felt it made things complicated - though you were also an overthinker. Too many what ifs. What if it didn’t work out? What if you hated working together? What if you spent too much time together? What if, what if, what if?

“I'll see you after dinner rush then.” He winked at you and your heart almost stopped. Jesus fuck, you were down bad for a man you wanted to strangle. He walked off, leaving you standing there with Wire. You watched him leave, admiring his fat ass as he left before you turned back to your best friend.

He burst into laughter and you narrowed your eyes. “You're the worst, you know that?” That caused him to laugh harder. “Oh my god. I was just waiting for the moment for the part where you both just tear off each other's clothes and start going at each other right there, holy shit.”

Your face immediately warmed up. “Shut up, Wire. No one asked you.” You folded your arms across your chest with a frown. “You could've fucking warned me he was hotter ‘n hell.”

Wire laughed again. “And miss the look on your face? That was priceless. I've never seen you be so taken aback before. The great y/n rendered speechless by the new cook.”

“Don't call him the new cook. He's gotta prove himself first.”

Another chuckle came from your best friend and he shook his head. You sighed, looking in the direction said man had left.

“What are you thinking about now?”

“How it's a shame he's not a baker with all that cake he's got. And how I wouldn't mind him icing mine.” Wire burst into laughter again and you just shook your head, clicking your tongue. “Too bad he won't last.”

Your attention shifted to the customers that walked in and you headed over to greet them.

Rush was busier than usual. It was always insane, but it was even more so tonight. This was something you usually lived for, the chaos of the floor. It kept things interesting and helped time fly by. Slow nights drove you insane, which is why you were always scheduled the busiest nights too. Plus, you were insanely good at your job.

Being head server, your main job was just making sure that things were going out on time, keeping tabs on your servers, and taking care of any customer issues. You were technically a manager, yes, but you liked the title of head server better.

However, you could feel eyes on you all night. Yes, that's typically normal considering you're a server, but this was different. You also knew exactly who the culprit was. The new fucking cook. Every time you headed to the back or to the window, his eyes were on you. You'd glance at him, catching him red handed.

Only, he didn't look away like most people. He kept his stare, only offering up a grin and the occasional wink as he cooked. Your body heated up every time, flustered that he was so casual. Your mind was running wild with what you wanted him to do to you. You tried to keep yourself busy, but the growing heat across your whole body was making it hard.

You tried to lie to yourself, saying it was because rush was busier than usual and you were running around even more. Every time you finally started calming down, he seemed to appear out of nowhere with his stupid smile, sending you into a spiral again.

You could honestly punch him, that might just solve your problems. He was aggravating in every sense of the word. His cocky attitude was getting to you, making you even crabbier than you already had been. You were trying your best not to take it out on your fellow servers or the customers. It was fine for the most part.

After rush, you asked another server to cover the one table you had left so you could take a minute. You immediately beelined it to the walk in. You flung the door open, unbuttoning your shirt a few times as you walked in. You closed your eyes, listening to the hum of the fans keeping it cool, and taking a deep breath as you fanned yourself with your hand.

Then the door opened, revealing the new guy. Someone mentioned his name was Killer. Funny. You wonder how he ended up with a stupid nickname like that.

You glared at him as the smug smile spread across his face. Unfortunately, you knew he didn't end up leaving. His eyes being glued to you all night constantly reminded you that he had proven you wrong. He actually had done pretty well and the customers seemed to enjoy his cooking. He'd be sticking around as long as he wanted now - the job was his. Which also meant you had to deal with the fact that you were going to have to see him almost every day.

“Guess you're stuck with me now, huh?”

“What are you even here for? Just to bother me?” You were in a foul mood and it was all his fault. You weren’t in the mood for his cocky attitude or ‘I told you so’ right now

“Well, I originally came back here to grab something but now I don't even remember what it was supposed to be now that you're in front of me looking like that.”

You looked down at yourself, confused. “What? Gonna make fun of me?” You were disheveled and hot, your skin flushed in some places.

“No. You actually look really good like that.” A lazy smile appeared on his face as he folded his arms and leaned against the shelves. What the hell was he doing?

You could feel your body growing warmer despite the cooler air being blown at you. “The hell is your fucking angle? You've been staring all night and now you’re saying weird shit.”

He blinked, raising his eyebrows. “And here I thought I was being obvious.”

You stared at him for a moment as your head spun. What did- oh. Your eyes widened slightly and his grin grew. “Now you got it.”

Though, he didn't have much time to say anything else before you essentially pounced on him. You couldn't take it anymore, he'd been riling you up all night and you were at your wits end. And he was here, basically telling you to screw him. Actually, literally.

You had walked over, grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and kissed him hard. He grinned into you, wrapping his arms around you. “Finally,” he mumbled.

You shook your head. “Don't let your big mouth ruin it.” He just laughed before kissing you again, patting your ass. You took the hint, hopping up and wrapping your legs around him. He held you with ease, hands firmly on your ass as he pinned you to the shelves. He squeezed you hard, making a small whine escape your lips.

Your own hands pressed against his chest before pausing. You felt something through his shirt. “Oh my god - are your nipples pierced?” You had never moved faster than you were right now as you undid his shirt.

He blinked in confusion at your sudden shift of attention, disoriented and a little pouty that you pulled away like you did.

You opened his shirt and, lo and behold, piercings. Your eyebrow raised and a grin spread across your face. “Now, that's hot as hell,” you mused as you ran your hands across his broad chest and piercings, tugging at them a bit. You heard him inhale slightly but before you could play much further, you were set on the ground, lips attacking your neck.

You felt his teeth graze your neck before lightly biting at you as a hand slipped past your waistband and you felt him begin to toy with you. Getting right to business.

Immediately, you melted into him, your hands gripping his shirt as your breathing grew shallow and labored. You cursed under your breath, your legs spreading slightly to give him better access. You definitely didn't see yourself shagging this man so quickly, if at all, and especially in the walk in. Who the hell were you at this point?

Though, it wouldn't be the first time someone hooked up in here and it also wouldn't be the last. You just never thought it'd be you.

“Fuck,” you whined, feeling his fingers circle your clit before sliding down further and a single finger teasing your folds. He kissed you again, patting your thigh. Once again, you knew what he was asking, hiking up your leg and he held it as one of his thick fingers slipped inside of you. You gasped, moaning against him. Fuck, you hated how much you were loving this. The last thing he needed was an ego boost.

But honestly, you were too horny to care.

You were ripped out of what little thoughts you had when he slid in another finger, moving them around inside you. You moaned loudly, causing him to kiss you once more to keep you quiet. Sure, the walk in had the constant fan to keep things cool and it muffled noise, but it wasn't completely soundproof.

Knowing your coworkers, if they noticed both of you gone, they more than likely put two and two together. Especially the longer you were gone. You were kind of surprised that no one checked the walk-in yet, they were typically nosey as hell.

Your moans were growing louder and you rolled your hips against his hand, wanting more. “You're a noisy one, hm?”

“Says the one who cant shut the fuck up,” you mumbled back, breathlessly. He just grinned, inserting another digit, causing you to shudder and moan again. He moved his fingers around, his thumb stimulating your clit as he did so. He was hitting all the right spots and it was driving you insane.

“Keep your leg up,” he said as he let go before reaching that hand around you to untie your apron. He emptied it out and rolled it up all with one hand. You watched in confusion but as soon as you opened your mouth to ask what he was doing the cloth was shoved into your mouth. Your eyes widened in surprise.

“Since someone can't keep quiet, I'm not going to be able to focus on ruining you and keeping you quiet.” Your face turned red, your body heating up even more. You felt like you were on fire. This was the most embarrassing situation you've been in but holy shit did it turn you on.

Before you had much time to react, his hand placed itself back holding your leg and his other hand began to move inside of you. His fingers moved fast and ruthlessly, his thumb assaulting your clit in the process. Your eyes widened at the sudden change of movement, moaning loudly. The apron muffled it, so maybe he'd been right. You don't know how to keep quiet. Shit, how was this man single? With hands like this?

You felt a coil tightening deep within you, your hips rolling and grinding against him. You were moaning and whining. The apron was going to be soaked by the end of this endeavor.

Right before you reached your climax, he stopped moving before pulling his fingers out of you. You whined in protest, looking at him with desperation. You should've expected something like this at this point, but you were so lost in the sauce that you forgot who was currently fucking you right now.

He spun you around, pressing you into the shelves, and pulling your ass out. He gave you a firm smack, making you whine into the apron. Fuck, he was driving you insane. It's like he knew exactly what you liked.

A shiver ran down your spine as he pulled your pants down, exposing you to the cold air of the walk in. It also didn't help that you were soaking wet either, making things even colder. You gripped onto the shelves before you, trying to keep yourself from shivering anymore.

Soon, you felt his body heat close to you. Now a shiver of anticipation ran down your spine. You had felt him press against you earlier when you were making out. He had felt big and usually you'd end up on your knees, getting a nice jaw exercise before you ended up getting railed. However, Killer kind of just took the lead and took care of you. Which isn't something you were really used to. You were also used to usually ending up having to finish yourself off.

But by the looks of things that wouldn't be the case this time.

Killer pressed a kiss to your shoulder before leaning into your ear. You felt the heat of his body wash over you, the sudden temperature shift making you shiver. “If its too much, bang on the shelf twice.” You just raised an eyebrow at him. If only you didn't have this makeshift gag, you would've said something smart.

“Don't worry,” he said. “I can read your comment in your eyes.” You just narrowed your eyes at him, making him grin - he was eating every moment of this up. You weren’t sure how you felt about him already knowing you so well.

Your glare didn’t last very long before you felt the fat head of his cock press against you. A sharp inhale went through your nose in surprise, not expecting him to be quite that large - he was about the same size as some of your bigger toys. Your eyes rolled back as he began to slide his way into you. You groaned, gripping onto the shelving as you stretched around him. You could feel him throbbing against you as your own walls throbbed trying to expand enough to fit him.

You took each inch of him like a champ, spreading your legs more and bending over to get him to fit all inside of you. He eventually bottomed out and you both were panting as he paused for a moment. You could tell he was holding himself back, which you appreciated. You’d rather not have anything tear. That was never a pleasant experience.

“Look at that,” he breathed. “You took in every inch of me. Good job, baby.” His voice was low as he spoke into your ear. You weren’t exactly sure about the petname, but fuck hearing the praise made your head swim. What was up with you? You were never this submissive.

You moved, pressing into him slightly as you whined. You needed him to move. He just chuckled, but luckily took the hint.

He pulled out of you slowly, almost agonizingly slow. You knew he had to be messing with you. You glared at him over your shoulder and he just grinned back at you. You had half a mind to take the apron out and say something. You started to reach for it when he slammed back into you. Your eyes widened, tears pricking the corners of your eyes as they rolled back. A strangled scream erupted from your throat as you felt yourself climax suddenly. Pleasure ripped through your body, every inch of you shaking as you held onto the shelves for dear life.

Your breathing was heavy, labored. You hadn’t been expecting that in the slightest. You thought he’d take it a little easier, but at the same time you’d never felt anything that good…probably ever.

“Too much?” You looked at him through your blurred vision, shaking your head. A smile appeared on his face, replacing the concern that had been there. “I knew you could take it,” he said. In that moment, you realized he was panting pretty heavily too. His skin glistened with sweat, hair sticking to his face. Fuck, he was one of the most beautiful men you’d ever seen in your life.

His hands gripped onto your hips and you knew you were about to have your shit absolutely rocked. You gripped the shelves, bracing yourself. As you predicted, he absolutely started to go to town. One way station to pound town, population: you. Or however the saying went. In moments, the sound of skin against skin mixed with grunts and moans was filling the walk in. You just silently prayed that the cooling system was loud enough to muffle the noise for the most part.

You didn’t dwell on this too long as your mind was slipping further and further into the lusty abyss of pleasure. Your entire body felt like it was on fire despite the fans blowing right on the two of you. You wouldn’t have been surprised if you the cooler was going to end up being on the warmer side after all was said and done.

With the absolute ferocity he was drilling into you, you wouldn’t be surprised if you couldn’t walk or had some serious bruising tomorrow. You knew you’d have to push through it though because tomorrow was your double. Fuck, you really didn’t think this through. Hell, you didn’t think at all.

Again, your thoughts came and went, never sticking around for long and soon just nonexistent. Your eyes were practically glued to the back of your head as he used you. This was the railing of a lifetime. You’d already came once and you could feel yourself on the cusp of another. Killer was also about at his wits end too - his movements were growing more desperate and erratic.

You reached the edge first, feeling your body shudder once more as euphoria washed over you with your climax. You let out a muffled, long moan. His hips also stilled as he came hard as well. You were filled with warmth, feeling overly stuffed even more so before feeling some of it leaking down your leg. Damn, just how much did he unleash inside of you?

You were slumped against the shelving, trying to collect yourself. Your eyes were closed as you panted heavily, too weak to make any movement right now. Killer was panting too, placing soft kisses along your shoulders and neck while whispering soft praises that made your head spin a little more.

After a few minutes, he reached over, pulling the soggy apron out of your mouth. “Holy shit,” you mumbled, coughing a bit.

He slowly pulled out of you, making you whine slightly. You shivered as you were suddenly left empty, still too weak to move. He shoved himself back into his pants before helping you. He dressed you back up; pants on, apron around your waist. He stood you back up. “Are you alright?”

At this point, you weren’t sure - still on cloud nine. “I think I’ll be fine.” You stretched a bit, wincing slightly. “Tomorrow’s gonna suck though.”

“I can cover for you.”

You looked at him for a moment before bursting into laughter. “No offense, but I think you’d be a shit server.”

He frowned. “And here I thought shagging you would take the attitude out of you.”

You raised a brow, putting your hands on your hips. “Is that what you thought? Sorry, this isn’t something that comes from needing to be laid. I’m just always a bitch - personality trait.” You shrugged, retying your apron. You fixed yourself up before looking over at Killer. You snorted, buttoning his shirt back up.

“Looks like I’ll just have to try again.” A smug smile appeared on his face and you looked at him, a smile tugging on the corners of your own. “You can try as many times as you want, loverboy. It ain’t happening.”

“I’ll ice that cake anytime.” Your eyes widened at his words and he laughed. “Yeah, I heard your little baker comment earlier. So you like my ass?” He winked, making your face turn red. “Fix your hair,” you mumbled. “Make it look less obvious we just boned.”

“Yes, boss.”

You rolled your eyes, flinging the walk-in door open to reveal several of your coworkers standing there. Wire grinned widely, a smug look on his face. “Everyone owes me twenty bucks.” There were collective groans. “No one knows our head server better than me, you should’ve known better than to bet against me.” He shook his head, holding his hand out as everyone forked over money.

“But they literally never sleep with anyone that works here ever,” someone protested, pouting.

You knew right then and there - you were never going to hear the end of this.

#im pretty sure i lost my vcard in a walk in but i really dont remember lmfaoooo #it really is a wonderland in there tbh #like earlier i was doing inventory and taking shots #my favorite meal at work is a blinker in the walk-in #it's a staple place tbh #one piece #massacre soldier killer #killer x reader #killer #killer one piece #am fics #smut pieces #one piece x you #one piece x reader

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notiddygothgf · 3 months ago

Text

4. Taste Like Nicotine

★ pairings: aki hayakawa x fem reader

★ ❝ Go back to Himeno. ❞ ❝ No. That's not what you want. ❞

★ c.w.: suggestive themes, drinking (more content warnings and tags)

★ a/n: HELLO AGAIN MY POOKIE DOOKIES!! IM BACK AGAIN. bc i have nothing better to do atm and i wanted to give yall a lil sum sum before i moved away to uni. please excuse the pacing of this chapter -- this fanfic was supposed to be a oneshot and uh... now its 160 pages in google docs LMFAOOA.. things get spicy in this chapterrr! so yeah anyway, you know the drill, keep me entertained -- keep your funny little comments coming, I absolutely love reading them. You guys motivate me to keep going! Love yall

★ w.c.;4.1k

shameless ; chapter index

THE OFFICE WAS QUIET, the hum of fluorescent lights and the occasional rustling of papers the only sounds that broke the silence. You were alone, finishing up some last-minute paperwork after hours. The mission had gone surprisingly well—no casualties, a rare feat in your line of work. The team had even managed to kill a large Devil containing a piece of Gun Devil Flesh, a significant victory. Yet, instead of joining the others to celebrate, you had chosen to stay behind. Partly to avoid any awkward encounters with Himeno, but mostly because you felt restless, unable to shake off the events of the past few days.

As you finished up the last of your reports, you glanced at the new message on your phone.

HIMENO| you didn't come tonight.

Typing...

YOU

| I didn't think you'd wanna see me after the stunt I pulled.

HIMENO| I dont, but I wanted u to know that everyone is talking abt u

YOU

| ??

| wym

HIMENO

| your shadow didn't come tonight, either.

Typing...

YOU| look, himeno, ive actually been wanting to talk to you about that

| would you be able to meet up and talk it out?

HIMENO| id rather not honestly.

| ur a grown woman and i cant stop u from doing what u want

| but just know that people in pb. safety talk

| dont mess up a relationship with a perfectly good man for aki

| u should leave him for someone who can actually give him what he needs

YOU| I understand that I've hurt you, Himeno, and I'm sorry

| I have no intentions of being with Aki.

HIMENO| good

| dont get him mixed up in ur fucked up marriage

| he doesnt deserve that.

You sighed, pocketing your phone. There were certain battles you simply couldn't win. This would undoubtedly be one of them.

It was late, and you knew you should head home. You gathered your things and made your way down the dimly lit hallways, your footsteps echoing in the emptiness.

As you passed the breakroom, you heard voices. One familiar voice, more specifically.

You slowed your pace, not wanting to intrude but curious enough to catch a snippet of the conversation. The door was slightly ajar, and you could see two figures inside.

"You look desperate, dude," the unknown person said, barely audible. "It's not attractive."

"I'm becoming ridiculous," Captain Hayakawa said, his voice low and strained. "I'm losing hope."

"Hope of what? Convincing a married woman to break her vows?" the other person retorted, a hint of incredulity in his tone.

Are they talking about me? You asked. You knew the answer. You simply did not want to confront it.

Hayakawa sighed. "I thought she would call me by now," he admitted, the vulnerability in his voice making your stomach churn uncomfortably. "I just... there was something there."

There was a pause, then the other person sighed, his voice softening. "God, you are ridiculous." After a moment, he added, almost reluctantly, "Shit, sorry, man. I know you like her."

"No, you're right," He replied, a note of resignation following his words. "She doesn't want to speak to me. I'm driving myself crazy waiting for someone who's never gonna call."

You felt a knot tighten in your stomach, guilt and confusion swirling together. You hadn't intended to eavesdrop, but now you couldn't just walk away without feeling a pang of something—regret, perhaps? The slip of paper with his number, still in your possession, weighed heavily in your mind. You had been avoiding the situation, avoiding him, and now it was clear how much it had affected him.

Aki's words echoed in your ears as you stood frozen in the hallway.

He was right; you hadn't called him. You hadn't even acknowledged the note, too caught up in your own turmoil and guilt to consider his feelings. Now, hearing him speak so openly, you felt a rush of emotions—sympathy, guilt, confusion. There had been a moment between you, an undeniable spark, but you had chosen to ignore it, to pretend it didn't exist.

When would it all come crashing down – your efforts? This whole situation?

The conversation in the breakroom continued, but you couldn't listen any longer. You turned away, your heart pounding. As you made your way to the exit, you couldn't help but replay Aki's words in your mind.

He had been waiting for you, hoping you would reach out, and now he was losing hope. Fuck.

He had been waiting for me.

The idea thrilled you, for some strange reason. Maybe because you hadn't felt desired like this in years – it made your head spin. But another part of you was terrified—of what it might mean, of the complications it would bring, of the impact on your marriage.

You couldn't help yourself. You did what you always did. You ran away from him.

You knew you couldn't avoid him forever, but for now, you needed time to think. .

7:45 PM

Typing...

Hey. |

Typing...

Hello, |

Typing...

How are you? |

Typing...

Hey. They're taking me out for drinks tn as a sendoff party. I think you should be there.

SENT.

YOU | Hey. They're taking me out for drinks tn as a sendoff party.

I think you should be there.

| At the Sip-n-savor in downtown Tokyo

Seen 8:00 PM .

The night went on without a flaw. The atmosphere was infectious, and you had been trying to let loose, drink in hand, as you chatted and danced with the others. But as the night wore on, a sense of unease settled in. Maybe it was the drinks, maybe it was the memories of the overheard conversation in the breakroom, or maybe it was the subtle disappointment that someone hadn't shown up.

Excusing yourself, you made your way to the bathroom. The mirror reflected your flushed cheeks and slightly smudged makeup. You sighed, turning on the faucet and splashing some water on your face. As you washed your hands, you found yourself thinking about Aki.

Despite everything, a depraved part of you had hoped to see him tonight. You had been both relieved and disappointed when he hadn't shown up—relieved because it meant avoiding an awkward conversation, disappointed because you had been... well, actually looking forward to seeing him.

As you touched up your makeup, you couldn't help but reflect on your own conflicted feelings. You were married, committed, and yet, Aki had stirred something in you that you simply couldn't stand to ignore. It was confusing, disorienting. You weren't sure what you felt more strongly: guilt for being drawn to him or frustration that you couldn't just let it go.

"Ugh," You groaned, pressing your forehead against the sink. "'M g'nna be sick."

Feeling a bit lightheaded from the drinks, you decided to step outside for some fresh air. You left the bathroom and – completely drunk – maneuvered through the crowds to the nearest door.

The cool night breeze was a welcome relief against your warm skin, and you leaned against the balcony railing, taking deep breaths. The city lights twinkled below, and you watched them in a daze, trying to steady your thoughts.

That's when you saw him.

Aki was just entering the party, his sharp suit and dark hair making him stand out immediately. You felt your heart skip a beat. Then another. He was killing you.

He came, you thought, a strange mix of emotions flooding you. Relief, excitement, and that persistent undercurrent of guilt all tangled together.

He spotted you almost immediately and made his way over. As he approached, you couldn't help but think how painfully gorgeous he looked, the dim lighting casting a soft glow on his features. In that moment, he seemed almost like a knight in shining armor, a figure out of place in the lively, chaotic setting of the bar.

"Hey," he greeted, his voice smooth and warm, a balm to your nerves.

"Hey," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady despite the fluttering in your chest.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked, a slight concern in his tone. "You're not cold?"

He always seemed to be worried about you and the weather. Still, the chill felt nice against your hot skin, oddly enough.

I missed you, you didn't say. You didn't even think about it. You knew that in a day you would be back on the train and all of this would just be a bad dream, anyway.

You shook your head, a small smile playing on your lips. "No, I just needed some air. It's a bit stuffy in there."

Aki didn't respond immediately, and when you turned your head up to look at him, his expression was unreadable. The noise from inside the bar seemed distant, the world narrowing down to just the two of you in that moment. You felt a tug in your chest, a pull towards him that you couldn't explain, couldn't deny.

"Did you pregame the bar, or something?" You laughed quietly. It felt nice, being able to pretend nothing had ever happened between the two of you and just... enjoy each other's company. "You smell like beer."

"I was having a few drinks with my roommate before you texted me," He answered. Then, looking out onto the street, he added, "He told me I shouldn't come tonight. Said you're driving me crazy."

"So, why are you here, then?" You asked.

He looked at you. "I think you know why I'm here."

There was a brief silence, comfortable yet charged with the unspoken. You glanced at him, noticing the way his eyes lingered on you, soft but searching. It was the same look he had given you in the seminar, the museum, everywhere else, and it stirred something deep inside you.

You hated the way he made you feel.

"Can I buy you a drink?" He asked you. His voice was as deep and rich as ever, and you had about half a mind to take him up on the offer.

You shivered. You knew it wasn't from the cold air. It was him – the smell of him, his cologne, the distinct scent of nicotine that let you know he had just finished smoking a cigarette. It was an aroma so unique to him that you had grown to like it.

You were looking at his lips before you knew it, giving way to a craving you couldn't explain, "I'll try a cigarette, if you have any."

He smiled softly, reaching into his pocket and flipping open a carton of cigarettes and a lighter. He placed a cancer stick between your lips, and you felt a part of you die a little. He struck the wheel of the lighter, bringing the cigarette to life.

You coughed so hard that you nearly hacked up a lung. It had been years since your last cigarette.

Hayakawa stepped behind you, cupping a hand around your elbow, sliding it up your arm, your wrist, your fingers before he plucked the cigarette from your digits.

"First time?" He asked, warm voice hot against your neck.

"Wanted to give it a try," You shrugged. You didn't know what, exactly, had gotten into you. It seemed that with every sip of liquor you took lately, you crept closer and closer back to your old self. The sort of liquid courage that made people make very bad decisions. "Sorry. I'm a little," You waved your hands around yourself, trying to gesture 'drunk' without actually saying it.

"How brave of you," He murmured, pulling a hit from your cigarette and exhaling. He was the picture of sin – face flushed with alcohol, messy bangs, pink lips wrapped around a cancer stick. He was so pretty it hurt.

"I'll try it again when I'm sober," You offered.

"When?" He asked, breathing smoke out into the air. "Where?"

As persistent as always, you thought. Still, you didn't necessarily mind the attention anymore. You told yourself that it didn't matter – you would be out of here soon anyway, and everything would be far behind you before you knew it.

"Why is it that every time I'm inebriated... God tests me by throwing you in my way?" You laughed, Truly, you wished you had considered the implications of your words a little more before you had said them. "Just as I thought your manners had improved since the party. You behaved badly, then. You know that? Very badly," you hiccuped. "You should be ashamed of yourself, throwing– hic–throwing yourself at a married woman like that."

He didn't acknowledge your drunken ramblings, and he also didn't deny the fact that he had been doing exactly that – throwing himself at a married woman.

"Hardly my fault," He breathed out. "I just can't seem to resist you."

"Don't worry," You replied, eyeing him up dubiously as he pulled another hit from what was left of your cigarette. "I'm leaving tomorrow. Won't have to worry about resisting me after that."

"I know," He answered back. "Selfishly enough, I spent the last few hours wishing your train got delayed one more day, or something like that," He exhaled, then snuffed his cigarette out on the balcony, "Still, I'm glad I could see you before you went home."

"I wish I could say the same about you," You replied before you could stop the words from coming out.

He poked his tongue through the inside of his cheek, retorting, "You're gonna sit here and act like you didn't invite me? Like your eyes didn't light up like a child when you saw me pull up?" He turned around, commanding even more of your attention, standing at least a foot and a half taller than you. "You wanted me to come tonight."

It was true. That's the worst part. Everything he said was the truth.

"So that I could say goodbye," You said with remarkable finality, "I'm leaving after this."

You hadn't originally planned on leaving so soon, of course, but you wanted to get the hell out of here before you made another bad decision.

"Already?" He asked.

"You're the one who ran late," You replied. "This ends tonight. I'm going to say bye to everyone else, then I'll be gone."

With that being said, you made your way back to the door. You would go inside, bid everyone farewell, collect your belongings, and then–

He called your name before you could go back inside. You froze in place.

"Am I misreading the signals?" He asked.

You sighed, turning around one last time to clear the air, "This has to stop, Aki. You make me feel like... like I'm guilty of something."

He implored you, "What do you want me to do?"

"Go back to Himeno," You answered, a biting undertone seeping through your words. You were undeniably bitter about the whole situation, and under any other circumstances, you would have tried to be a good sport, but...

Himeno's words were a heavy weight on your heart.

'Don't mess up a relationship with a perfectly good man for Aki.'

'You should leave him for someone who can actually give him what he needs."

You could never be what Aki wanted. He wanted all of you – not just a week of you, clearly. You were married, and you couldn't let all of that go over a guy you'd been toeing the line with for what seemed like ages.

He was a young man. The fact of the matter was that you were a grown woman. A married one.

"She's a sweet, kind woman," You continued. You felt like you were going to be sick just being near him. Unknowingly, tears began to prickle at the corners of your eyes. "Go back and beg her to forgive you. Go be with someone who wants to be with you. Who can be with you."

"No," He answered simply. There was an intensity in his eyes that frightened you, like he would die without you, as he continued, "That's not what you want. I think we both know that. I refused a mission in Hiroshima to stay here with you. I planned to let go of another one in Beijing," He swallowed, "I can change my mind, and you'll never see me again."

"If you have any consideration for me," Your voice was a shuddering whisper, like someone could walk out any minute and hear the two of you going back and forth. "Any semblance– a shrivel of compassion, you'll give me back my peace."

He shook his head, "I can't. You know I can't. You've consumed every inch of my peace, every inch of my mind. How can I give you your peace?"

Fair point.

You had nothing to say to him. So, silently, your vision blurred with tears, you glared at him. Glared and frowned like that would make you believe he was the sole contributor to this issue. Then, again, you turned on your heel and went for the door. You entered the bar quickly.

He followed not too long after you, "I'll go to Beijing, then."

"No." You said. Your teary-eyed fury caught the eyes of more than a few confused bar patrons. "I don't want you to go."

Everyone was looking at you. Seriously, everyone. Your old coworkers, the bartenders, everybody.

You swallowed down your pride, bowing down before them all. "Good night, everyone," You said. You plucked your purse and your jacket off of the barstool. "Thank you for everything. I'm leaving."

Ignoring the confused looks and hushed whispers from the patrons, you exited the bar, your mind a whirlwind of emotions. The rain had started to fall, a soft drizzle quickly turning into a steady downpour. You barely noticed, too wrapped up in the turmoil inside your head. The cold, wet sensation of the rain soaked through your clothes, but you couldn't bring yourself to care. You just needed to get away, to clear your mind.

But of course, Aki followed after you. You could hear him calling your name, his voice barely audible over the sound of the rain. You quickened your pace, almost running, your heels splashing through puddles as you made your way down the block. His footsteps pounded behind you, matching your speed. You couldn't escape him, couldn't outrun him.

Finally, he caught up to you, grabbing your arm to stop you. "Wait, can we please talk?" he pleaded, his voice breathless and desperate.

You turned to face him, rain pouring down around you both. His hair was plastered to his forehead, his suit jacket soaked through. The intensity in his eyes matched the storm, a fierce determination that made your heart ache. You met his gaze begrudgingly, not wanting to deal with this, not wanting to deal with him.

"Have I really been imagining all of this?" He asked. He sounded broken. "Is it really all in my head? Tell me if it's a lie. Tell me to leave you alone. Tell me you mean it—all of it," he paused, taking a shuddering breath. "Or tell me the truth."

You swallowed hard, the weight of the situation crashing down on you. "I don't know how to feel, Aki," you finally admitted, your voice barely a whisper. "I'm trying to be good, but you just keep fucking—popping up everywhere. And you say these pretty things to me, and," You choked back a sob, struggling to find the right words. "I can't help myself around you."

"Running from your problems won't make me go away," he said, stepping forward to put his hands gently on your waist.

There was a long pause as you stood there in the rain, staring at each other. The world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you. The storm, the bar, everything else was just a blur. You were tired—tired of running, tired of the confusion, tired of pretending that everything was fine when it wasn't.

He added, "You can't run from your feelings."

This time, it was his eyes that dropped to your lips. His tongue darted out to dampen his own, and then his eyes flicked up to your face. When he spoke, his voice was huskier than before, as if it had been tainted by an emotion that hadn't been there before. Was it lust? Passion? Whatever it was, you wanted more of it.

Your eyes widened. Your mouth had run dry. You didn't know what to say. Even being like this right now -- as close as you were, -- was against your wedding vows. This was wrong, and you couldn't do that to your own husband.

Your own husband who loved you so dearly.

Your own husband who left you hanging so many nights on end.

Your own husband, who acted as if he couldn't care if you lived or died.

As if he had sensed your train of thought wandering, Aki placed two fingers beneath your chin, lifting your face up until he was the captor of all of your attention. Him and him alone. Not your husband, but him.

"I could treat you like a princess," His eyes wandered down to your lips again, but this time there was an unspoken hunger within them. "All you have to do is ask, and I'm yours. I already am."

And, God, what a fool you had been in uttering the words, "Don't toy with my emotions. You don't want me."

He paused, awaiting something, anything. His eyes pleaded with your own, luring you in with promises of pleasure and happiness. Gently, he grabbed your hand, placing it over his breast, right above his heart.

"I want you so badly it hurts," He breathed, "For a night, for a day, for a week..." Aki closed the gap between the two of you – brought your faces closer together. Closer, until you could feel the warmth of his calm breath fanning out against your cheek. Closer, until he uttered, "As long as you'll let me have you."

"Aki, I can't-...." You paused. Yet, still, you never moved. Your body betrayed your words, dilated pupils and trembling hands giving way to your internal dilemma. "This is wrong. You know I can't do this."

You were being a hypocrite. You knew you were. One spare glance down at the placement of your hands on his chest -- one over his breast and one looped around his tie -- and you knew he could tell you were only putting up a front.

"I know," he murmured softly, words practically dying beneath the volume of the rain, "But I can't stop thinking about you."

You folded. Your eyes dropped down to his lips one last time, and that's when you knew he had already won.

Fuck it.

"Fuck you," you muttered, feeling a surge of reckless abandon.

Without thinking, you reached out and pulled him towards you, crashing your lips against his in a desperate, frenzied kiss. It was messy and wet, your tears mixing with the rain, your hands tangling in his hair as his arms finally wrapped around you.

The kiss was filled with all the pent-up emotions, the longing, the frustration, the desire. It was passion, it was anger – it was tongue and teeth and lips smearing your lipstick over the lower half of your face. It was two black holes finally colliding after circling around each other far too long.

"I can't make sense of it. I want... you," you sighed, pulling away, voice trembling, "I don't know what any of this means anymore. I don't know what to think."

"Then don't," he whispered, his breath warm against your lips. He tasted like cigarette smoke, beer and mint gum – a flavor so utterly addicting that you couldn't seem to get enough of it. "Don't think. Let me take you back to your room."

You hesitated, the reality of the situation hitting you. This was crossing a line, a line you couldn't uncross. But as you looked into his eyes, saw the same turmoil reflected back at you, you felt your resolve crumble.

You were tired of pretending.

"Okay," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the rain. It was a final, resigned acceptance, the last nail in the coffin of your restraint.

You were tired of running from the inevitable.

a/n: dont hate me. LMFAOAOAOOAOA. i had to! i absolutely loved writing this chapter and i loved writing tipsy obsessed aki. i headcannon that he's a touchy needy bf and no one can tell me otherwise. i think you all know what happens next. im not sayin nothin tho. hehe. ANYWAYYYYY LMK WHAT YALL THOUGHTTTTT i look forward to hearing it!!! lmk what yall wanna see in the next few chapters/over the course of the story. and if youve already watched anna karenina (or read, in which case... how...) shhhhhh youve seen nothing. muah! x

credits: UNKOWN ATM. I found the cover pic on pinterest unfortch. If you know the artist, please let me know, so I can credit them properly for their work!!! This is NOT MY BEAUTIFUL DRAWINGGG. I obviously do not own csm or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.

also: come find me on my wattpad if u wanna interact more!

taglist: @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @acethebrave , @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505

wanna join the taglist? | shameless ; chapter index

#god i love drunk aki #my life is yours #notiddygxthgf ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚#shameless!#aki hayakawa #hayakawa aki #aki hayakawa x reader #hayakawa aki x reader #aki x reader #csm x reader #chainsaw man x reader #denji x reader #eventual smut

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genderkoolaid · 1 year ago

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yeah im a aro-spec lesbian and ive literally been told that im 'reinforcing the predatory lesbian stereotype' bc i still sleep w/ ppl even tho im not really interested in dating rn. it doesnt matter that there are plenty of other lesbians that have casual sex, but apparently thats fine since they can fall in love but its bad when i do it bc im just 'using ppl' and 'have commitment issues'. even tho the women i sleep w/ all know and are fine w/ there not being any potential romance. but yeah amatonormativity totally isnt a problem in the lesbian community 🙄

yeah godddd even in queer spaces im super hesitant about being openly aro. cause casual sex/FWB is all fun and quirky when you're assumed to be allo and will eventually get a romantic partner/view casual sex as a gateway to romance. but if you are openly aro and want casual sex/FWB/sexual friendship/etc. then you are reinforcing stereotypes/internalized homophobia/traumatized/commitment issues/a heartless slut preying on allo people (who have feelings while we don't because we're incapable of love or being hurt!)

i think a lot of allo people don't understand that there is a difference in how people treat someone whose "taking a break from dating/sex to focus on themself" or "just having fun and letting off steam" and an aro/ace person just. existing and doing anything at all. if i told people i was taking a break from dating pr wasn't looking for anything serious right now they'd be totally chill, but say i don't feel romantic attraction, never want a romantic relationship and my ideal relationship is "friends with benefits"? suddenly they treat me like i'm a dr. phil guest.

and its bitterly ironic for the exact reason you mentioned: allos accuse us of "leading people on" and tend to assume we're going to be somehow toxic or abusive or predatory in relationships. and so we'll be so painfully clear about what we want and don't want and get confirmation that its okay a million times.... and then our allo lovers will get mad at us for not being okay with things we explicitly said we weren't okay with, and for not falling in love despite our explicit explanation that we don't fall in love.

#m.#ask box

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courtney-deserved-better · 1 month ago

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since i don’t have time to write fics for wlw week here are some wlw headcanons! @total-drama-wlw

(if i didn’t list a woman on here it’s not bc i necessarily headcanon her as straight and more that i don’t have a specific sexuality headcanon for her in general that fits this post)

beth - bisexual and i don’t think she realizes she also likes girls until in between tda and tdwt. something about her and lindsay’s trip to paris makes her realize she likes girls and she comes out to lindsay while they’re literally in jail and lindsay is the most supportive bestie ever. beth is also sometimes a lesbian to me. as a treat.

bridgette - if she had to label her sexuality she’d probably say bisexual but i think she prefers to not use a label and just vibe.

courtney - lesbian forever and ever in my heart 💜 don’t even get me started on her (affectionate)

gwen - bisexual who’s known she’s bisexual for a while and is very chill about it until she gets her first full blown crush on a girl and then she starts freaking out (not about being bisexual, she just doesn’t know how to handle a girl crush when she can barely handle a guy crush)

heather - lesbian but doesn’t realize it at first, just thinks she’s not into guys because she’s smarter and more strategic than all these other girls who are letting feelings get in the way of a million dollars

katie & sadie - started off very boy crazy but i think over time they were more into the idea of a relationship and a partner to obsess over than the boys themselves. but they’re not ready to come out to the other person because it will make them different so they both keep up the boy crazy act until finally they’re like… wait a minute we’re both lesbians and then they probably start dating each other or something. they give me the vibe of girls who were super into dan and phil and then realized they were more into the idea of having that kind of relationship with someone of the same gender than into guys. if that makes any sense.

sierra - not sure of her exact label but she’s a girl liker in at least one alternate universe

leshawna - probably a lesbian who isn’t quite ready to come out yet, still figuring herself out and experiencing occasional attraction to men which confuses her

eva - she’s a butch lesbian to me 💜

anne maria - bisexual and chill as hell about it

jo - butch lesbian who struggles to date because she has issues with femininity but she also views other butch women as competition. girlie has a lot she needs to work out

ella - either bisexual or comphet lesbian

jasmine - bisexual and i think also poly, she’d be down to date shawn and sammy at the same time

sammy - lesbian and in the closet because she doesn’t want amy to know and bully her (amy is also a lesbian but she’ll still bully sammy)

sky - also either bisexual or lesbian comphet

axel - ive seen her as a lesbian from day one (no im not projecting because she’s the td character who looks the most like me) but bisexual axel also intrigues me. truly depends on the situation

tdi emma - bisexual but everyone thinks she’s straight. after season two when they’ve become friends again, bowie finds out she’s bisexual and needs a day to recover from the shock

julia - bisexual but heavily prefers women, refuses to show emotional weakness and therefore doesn’t date anyone for a while

millie - lesbian who always gets crushes on straight girls so she never pursues them, very pessimistic about any crushes she does get

mk - lesbian but doesn’t want to date because love is lame

nichelle - lesbian who keeps her relationships private from the media not because she’s closeted but because she doesn’t want her love life plastered in tabloids

priya - my brain says bisexual but my heart says lesbian. my headcanons contain multitudes

rr emma - she’s either a lesbian or bisexual who is so much more attracted to men that she hesitates to label herself as bi. there’s literally no in between

jen - lesbian, she and tom are wlw/mlm solidarity, they are each others’ biggest hypemen when getting ready for dates

kitty - she’s either pan or aro and still figuring that out for herself. knows she is attracted to everyone equally but doesn’t know if the level of attraction is yes or no

the geniuses - that’s just a lesbian couple

the vegans - that’s a lesbian ex-couple who stayed friends but uh. that was maybe not the wisest choice

sanders - lesbian who is either dating macarthur or knows she deserves better. idk what macarthur’s deal is in the second scenario but she would be so protective of sanders if she got a girlfriend. immediately started imagining a fic where sanders and jo start dating and it creates this big rivalry between jo and macarthur that sanders has to deal with but that rivalry turns into a friendship which relieves sanders until she realizes that they two enable each other and now she’s like “idk if this is worse”

#total drama #tdwlwweek24

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wolftozier · 4 months ago

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You should share some of your recent favorite reddie aus :))

ABSOLUTELY!! im so sorry this took a little long, i was thinking it thru.

my recent fav aus:

@strangesickness has a brilliant swimming au for the losers and im obsessed with it. i didnt even do competitive swimming as a kid. i just love how hes translated the characters to the au.

@t4tozier has a very delightful little summer camp au over on ao3 here. i love camp aus (maybe because i never really experienced them? i did do school camps but they felt different to how americans seem to experience these camps, lmao). also theres a werewolf and wheres theres a werewolf theres a connor wolftozier lbr

i love magical aus so @missed-retro's witch eddie was very enjoyable. also. again. werewolves.

@panties-on-boys has a glee au i really liked- ive never watched glee but the fic was wonderful! and very beginner friendly to someone who only knows of glee thru recent social media memes.

its not reddie YET but @chiniichee's spiderman eddie au, especially bc im like. deep into my spiderman phase rn. im reading comics. im watching the sixties cartoon. its a disease. the fic is really good loved it a bunch. scratches that itch for me.

also my barely thought out changeling richie au <3 it has sat in my word document for months <3 maggie n went wanting a child so bad that it attracts the interest of fairies who want to feel that love so bad so they swap the toziers baby with one of their own (richie). who can shapeshift just enough to fit in with them but is always a little Off in acting and looking human.

also i legally have to say my own werewolf richie au. bc i posted 1 screenshot of it and made my best friend so sad over pathetic werewolf richie she sends me a message every time i post something abt werewolves begging me to let eddie give richie flowers. its a little funny. i love u dreams <3 no1 pathetic werewolf richie supporter <3

#promotes my fwends :)#ask #anon #reddie #tag spam IM SORRYYYY

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brian-kinney-apologist · 4 months ago

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hey babe!! i have a qaf question for u

ok so ive heard ppl in this (very small) fandom talk abt hal sparks really negatively either because of his character (understandable, micheal sucks ass) or because of his political views/beliefs/whatevers

i have never understood the second part and was told that u are quite the qaf historian so i was wondering if u could give me a lil summary of what those beliefs/views of his are because i would really like to know!!

ty in advance 🖤

well hello there, nice to know that my reputation in qaf fandom is still alive and well lol

so. here's the thing: if we're talking politics overall he didn't say anything questionable as far as I know (he has a podcast on youtube or smth where he trashes trump and other republican politicians (I'm not american so my knowledge of american politics is pretty basic so don't quote me on this one lol) so it's fine with me lol)

if we're talking the show though 👀💀

he did say some things back in the day that made people dislike him (but mind you now everything is cool between everyone involved in the show at least public wise so we're going to talk about the times when the show was airing and some time after it ended)

1. the most questionable™️ thing that he's ever said was comparing kissing a man (a costar on screen) to kissing a dog and people thought he meant that it was disgusting or smth BUT he did clarify later that people misinterpreted him because he meant that he's not attracted to men so kissing male costars on set during filming did nothing for him (it was an answer to some interviewer's question what it's like to kiss a man so take it as it is 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️)

btw interviewers AND fans had no decorum back in the day asking the whole cast all sorts of personal questions (poor randy still has ptsd bc of this 😭💀)

2. now it's tea time!!!! hal used to have a beef with gale and randy that led to him being hated by their fans. so. before the show aired hal was the most famous actor in the cast (except for sharon gless obviously) and he thought (was promised ?????) that he'd be the lead man™️ of the show. but after qaf aired everyone fell for gale (obviously sorry not sorry lol) because he served and ate everyone up. and also everyone focused on britin. hal didn't like that (considering it was basically gale's and randy's first roles on tv) and he started saying some stuff about them (publicly). for example, he said that actors' work is doing what's written in the script no questions asked. that was a clear dig at gale and randy as they were famous for constantly questioning/criticising the writers/showrunners/producers, disliking their plotlines and basically voicing their opinions on set (they did nothing wrong, should've complained more, look at s5 🥲). also hal did say one time that he would never work with gale again but didn't elaborate why. and as far as I know he did say more shady stuff about gale and randy during different interviews but I don't have any more specific examples (i think he was also constantly pointing out that he's straight while gale didn't say much about his own sexuality and hal was speculating about it). moreover, I remember reading somwhere that hal didn't like people who drank/did drugs bc he himself was against this stuff and gale and peter smoke some weed before some s1 promotion event and hal had a problem with it. the last thing: he also did complain about gale staying in character (whatever that means in regards of gale) during filming but no one else complained so 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️.

(I lied last thing fr fr I wanted to point out that gale and randy NEVER said anything back about hal so that kinda makes you think)

hope this helps, if someone has something to add or wants to correct me, feel free to do so

#i always feel weird posting qaf tea bc i feel like everyone in the fandom is going to see it lol #but overall idc about hal and idk that much about him as a person so 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️#ask #queer as folk #qaf

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lady-loveluck · 30 days ago

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Heyyyy I just wanted to say not to care what that anon said about how you drew Grace's body because despite whether or not you intended to make it fetishy it made me happy cry when I first saw it.

Ive always been really large chested, and when I was a teenager it was an especially large insecurity of mine. I know it sounds stupid, but i actually got bullied a lot when i was younger and my large chestedness became yet anoyher yhing the other kids could poke fun of. It left me with a lot of issues, and though I've been getting over it now as an adult i almost never see my exact build in art and stuff in a way that's meant to look normal and not really fetishy. And even though its a little silly it always makes me a bit sad because it makes me feel like I look too weird to really be represented in that way. But I saw the sketch you did of grace, and she looked EXACTLY like me - it was kinda uncanny ngl. And I cried a little because seeing that my favorite artist ever drew a character I loved as also large chested with a super similar build to mine really made my day. I didn't see that sketch as fetishy because it represented myself, in my eyes. All of your art has really realistic bodies and bodily proportions, and that was just another way for me to see that you see people and bodies like mine as normal and worthy of being drawn and idk I was just so happy that whole day bc of it.

So yeah, I love your art and I know that making someone cry definitely wasn't your intention when u drew grace but I wanted you to know that!!!! Your art always brings me so much joy, and that's just an example :)

Have a great day and thank you so much ❤

Hey! This message made me feel so happy, thank you so much for leaving this here. And despite what that anon thought, me giving Grace "huge milkers" (a joke I did once and the anon didn't like it lol) wasn't based on fetichization, but more on my own body aswell! Something I clarified at that moment. The only difference within my body and hers is that her nipples are inverted!

People with these type of bodies exists, like you and like me. And maybe a hot take, but people lately have been using the word "fetishization" too loosely. Finding something attractive doesn't mean you're fetishizing it, I like big tits, I find them hot as fuck! That doesn't mean I will fetishize a person that has big tits, they're a human being that deserves respect and decency like anyone else, they just posses a physical quality that make them attractive to me.

I'm so happy you like my art and that you feel represented by Grace's body, really, these type of comments mean a lot to me dude!

#loveluck ask

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triptuckers · 2 years ago

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as long as you'd like - tangerine

Request: no Pairing: tangerine x reader Summary: in which lemon and tangerine finished a job, and tangerine has a place for them to stay Warnings: swearing (bc its tangerine duh), slight mentions of injuries but nothing major Word count: 1.3K A/N: ive watched bullet train twice in like 4 days and im obsessed with tangerine (hence the shit load of fic recs I reblogged) enjoy!

it had been a really long day for lemon and tangerine. sure, they got the job done and it had been closer to their home city than past jobs. because it was so close by, they’d figured it would be over quickly. but it somehow it took longer than they had anticipated.

which is why tangerine is fighting to keep his eyes open as he’s driving.

they’re both quiet, which is unusual. it’s probably because lemon is tired as well. tangerine knows he just wants to sleep.

the adrenaline’s worn off, there’s less people on the road, and all tangerine can think about is a bed to sleep in.

‘oi, mate, you took a wrong turn.’ comes lemon’s voice from tangerine’s left.

tangerine’s gone off the highway earlier than usual. he’s too tired to keep on driving and he knows lemon is also exhausted, and therefore can’t take over.

‘it’s fine.’ says tangerine. ‘i know someone who lives near. we can crash there.’

‘who do you know?’ says lemon.

tangerine is silent for a while.

‘someone.’ he says.

‘fucking someone?’ says lemon. ‘we’re in some random fucking town cause you know someone?’

‘trust me on this.’

‘who is it?’

‘you’ll see.’

‘fucking hell, tangerine, just tell me.’

‘i said you’ll fucking see it, all right? jezus fucking christ, mate.’

the rest of the car ride is silent. lemon’s dozing off in the passenger seat and tangerine’s driving.

he’s driven this route many times, he could remember it with his eyes closed. there’s a reason he’s never told anyone about this - not even lemon. all to prevent attracting the wrong kind of attention. he could never be too careful, given what he does for a living.

he pulls up to an apartment complex, and lemon stirs awake. tangerine turns off the car and gets out.

he walks toward one of the staircases leading up to the apartments.

‘where the fuck are we?’ says lemon behind him.

‘in a minute.’ says tangerine.

‘fuck that, man. we’re at some random apartment complex in a small town we don’t fucking know, because you claim there’s someone here who you know.’ says lemon.

‘will you give it a fucking rest mate?’ says tangerine, getting annoyed at his brother. ‘we’ll be able to sleep and get a meal or whatever. we’re here, so you can stop your fucking complaining.’

they’re standing in front of one of the apartments. there’s a small window next to the door and the curtains are closed. yet a little light streams through a small gap between them.

‘we’re fucking breaking in and entering now?’ lemon whisper-shouts at tangerine.

‘it’s not fucking breaking in and entering because i’ve got a fucking key you idiot.’ says tangerine, pulling said key out of one of his pockets. ‘now will you shut up?’

tangerine steps forward and unlocks the door. he enters the apartment, lemon following closely behind him. after locking the door, tangerine walks further into the apartment.

‘tangerine who the fuck lives here?’ says lemon.

lemon looks at his brother as tangerine walks up to what looks like the living room of the apartment, where the light was coming from.

it’s not very big, there’s just enough space for a couch, a small coffee table and a tv. on the couch, underneath a pile of blankets, is the top of a head with messy hair visible. on the screen, the subtitles of a movie or tv show are rolling.

lemon watches as tangerine’s features soften when his eyes land on the person on the couch.

tangerine walks up to the couch, pulling the blankets slightly away from the person’s face and brushing some of the hair out of the way.

‘hello, love.’ says tangerine softly.

you slowly open your eyes, blinking a few times. the face in front of you comes into focus as you wake up, and you smile.

‘tan.’ you say. ‘you’re back.’

you sleepily reach out your arms to him and tangerine bends down to hug you, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

‘sorry for barging in here without notice, love, we just needed a place to crash and yours was closer.’ says tangerine.

‘we?’ you say, looking over his shoulder.

it’s only then you notice there’s another man in your apartment.

you let go of tangerine and get up from the couch, walking over to the other man.

‘hi.’ you say, holding out your hand for him to shake. ‘i’m y/n. you must be lemon?’

‘yeah.’ says lemon, clearly confused.

‘tan’s told me a lot about you.’ you say. ‘i’m so glad we finally met.’

‘well, i’m sorry to say i’ve not a fucking clue who you are.’ says lemon.

you frown, turning your head to look at tangerine.

‘you didn’t tell him about me?’ you say.

‘i told you, love, it’s safer this way.’ says tangerine, walking up to you.

‘i didn’t think the whole “not telling anyone about our relationship” thing also applied to your own brother.’ you say.

‘i’m sorry i’m a little lost here, who exactly are you?’ says lemon.

‘she’s my girl, mate.’ says tangerine, wrapping an arm around your waist.

‘you’ve got a girlfriend and you didn’t tell me?’ says lemon.

‘no i didn’t because-‘

‘what the fuck mate!’

‘lemon, let me just-‘

‘how long?’

‘what?’

‘how long have you had a girl?’

‘little over a year.’

‘a fucking year?’

‘will you shut the fuck up for a second and stop fucking interrupting me?’ says tangerine. ‘y/n and i have been dating for over a year and we figured the less people knew about it, the safer she’d be. which is why i didn’t fucking tell anyone because i would like to keep her alive.’

‘uh, if i may?’ you say, getting the attention of both of the brothers who, right now, looked downright dangerous with all the tension building up.

‘yeah, love?’ says tangerine.

‘we did agree to not tell anyone but i really didn’t know that meant lemon as well. as far as i know you spend a lot of time with him.’ you say. ‘but can we talk about all of this tomorrow? no offense, but it’s like three in the morning and i can tell everyone’s exhausted.’

‘yeah, sure.’ says tangerine as lemon nods.

‘the guest bedroom is all good to go.’ you say to lemon. ‘feel free to use the shower as well, if you’d like.’

‘thank you.’ says lemon.

‘it’s down the hall, third door to the right and the bathroom is the second door to the right.’ you say.

lemon thanks you again and takes off, muttering something about "secret fucking girlfriends" under his breath.

you look at tangerine and smile up at him.

'you alright?' you say.

'yeah, it wasn't that big of a deal. those guys were clearly not a big threat, we got the job done and got away with some cuts and bruises here and there, but we'll be fine.' says tangerine.

you take in the sight of him. it's true, he had the occasional cut or bruise on his face and his exposed neck, collarbone and part of his chest. you knew he liked the suits he wore and tried to maintain his look, but he often returned to you like this; no suit jacket, sleeves rolled up and a few buttons undone. you liked him best that way.

‘missed you.’ you say, stepping closer to him and wrapping your arms around him.

‘missed you too, my love. so fucking much.’ says tangerine, nuzzling his face in your neck. ‘i’ll show you just how much i missed you tomorrow.’

‘tomorrow?’ you say.

‘yeah because i drove five fucking hours to get here and i’m exhausted.’ says tangerine, making you smile.

‘i’ll take anything i can get.’

‘oh, you’ll get everything tomorrow, don’t you worry about that. for now i’ll just settle for some fucking sleep.’

‘it’s been too long since i’ve woken up with you next to me. how long are you staying?’

‘as long as you’d like, love.’

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rulesHere’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Max/Marit

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annabelle--cane · 9 months ago

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if we're sharing deh opinions i think the character dynamics are so interesting & i wish ppl would see that bc theres a lot of potential there but unfortunately the mass online hate towards the deh movie (which was a mediocre to bad adaptation anyway) has probably driven away a lot of ppl . & maybe this is just me but i think the hate towards ben platt during that time was way overboard , & a good chunk of what i saw veered into antisemitism & bodyshaming . criticizing him is fine but the ppl who constantly went after his looks were just unnecessarily rude. ben platt honestly didnt even look like , as old as ppl were saying he does. i saw a tiktoker saying his age is "ancient" & like jesus christ at the time he was like in his late 20s.

i feel like ppl think teenagers look a lot younger than they actually do. im in high school right now & ive seen sophomore boys with full beards who look like they could be adults & no one bats an eye. nik dodani looked about the same age as ben in the movie but no one went after him. i feel like a lot of it was just dumb ppl wanting to jump on a bandwagon to make fun of someone on the internet regardless of who it is or how much they know or care about dear evan hansen

personally i think if they had just released a proshot the response wouldve gone on better & mightve even attracted more new fans but we'll never know now i guess. feel free to ignore this i tend to ramble when deh is brought up

big agree, there was plenty wrong with the movie but honestly I stopped noticing the age thing after the first school scene, evan just reads as one of those unfortunate high school boys whom puberty hit like a truck a little too hard.

#deh #answered #anons

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analogwriting · 7 months ago

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The Walk-in

Killer x gn!reader (amab edition) word count: 4.2k afab vers. a/n: i got this idea from a revelation i had about how im pretty sure every walk-in in every restaurant ever has been boned in at least once. my source to site is me bc ive been working in the food industry since i was, like, 12. also guapo means 'handsome' in spanish.