#bc if i know them/care enough to give them a present on their birthday

[lurkiestvoid]

I just realized DST happened apparently?? And also my birthday is this month (fuck). I will not be announcing the date and hopefully will not be mentioning it again other than this One (1) Time bc it fills me with conflicting feelings of Dread and Longing so instead I prefer to just forget the whole concept. one day a year

[reverie-starlight]

skincare with keigo bc I'm never not soft for him and want to take care of him forever. happy birthday !!!!!!!!

gn!reader, no physical descriptions, lots and lots and lots of fluff. he is my baby. also I don't have a real skincare routine, so I'm apologizing in advance for how lackluster it may seem. this is in the pre-moving in together stage of your relationship, but not too early on either, if it matters to you!

keigo watches you curiously through the doorway that leads to the master bathroom as he sits on your bed cross-legged. he doesn't want to disrupt whatever it is you're doing (you seem very focused), but he's extremely interested in what you're putting on your face.

he thinks you look stunning with the fluffy animal headband on and some shorts paired with one of his old shirts. he thinks he could look at you like this forever, actually.

he watches you smile slightly and lean over the counter to get closer to the mirror. "I can feel you staring at me, you know."

his heart flutters and he tries to ignore how hot his face feels.

you stand up straight again and turn your face towards him, beckoning him over with a wave of your hand. as if he's been waiting for you to do just that, he gets up and saunters into the bathroom.

"so... what exactly is all this?" he asks, settling behind you with his arms around your waist, inspecting the different bottles and containers.

"they're skincare products. see?" you hold up one of the tubes for him to read, going back to spreading the cream over your skin.

"hydrating... morning and night use... huh."

you pick up on the curiosity in his voice and look at him through the mirror. “do you want to try my skincare routine for yourself, keigo?”

he hesitates and you give him a moment to decide, though you have a feeling you know what he’s going to say. eventually keigo does nod and you peck him on the cheek. “I’ll get you a headband, just a second.”

moments later you're sitting on the counter, shoving a white headband with panda ears over his head. he stares at himself in the mirror, watching you adjust it so his hair is pushed back from his forehead.

"you're so cute," you murmur, smiling at him and resisting the urge to press kisses all over his face. "okay, brush your teeth before we start. I've heard doing it after messes things up."

"really?" he sound skeptical.

you shrug. "I dunno if there's any merit to it but I've seen enough people mention it, so I just do it this way now."

he nods and reaches behind you to grab the red toothbrush you keep for him whenever he sleeps over. you sneak a kiss against the corner of his mouth when he's close enough and it makes him grin.

once he's done brushing his teeth, he steps away to spit into the sink and wipe his mouth before returning between your legs. "alright, what's first?"

you grab a tall tube and present it to him the same way he's seen people online do it in those viral review videos. "face wash. it helps get all the dirt and grime out, and it's good for sensitive skin."

you wet your hands in the sink and raise them to his face to dampen it. "this one suggests using it on slightly wet skin for better results."

he lets you pat him until you're satisfied, and he watches as you put some of the gel on your hands. "close your eyes."

you don't need to tell him twice.

keigo happily lets you massage the product into his face and you giggle a bit when he leans into it. "does it feel nice?"

he nods a bit. "so nice."

"alright, it's foamy now, you can wash it off."

he blinks, returning to reality, and does what you say. once all the face wash is gone, you tap a towel against him, careful not to rub. "okay, would you say your skin feels dry, oily or a combination of both most of the time?"

he thinks about how his skin can get a bit itchy and wind burnt from all the flying he does while on patrol. "very dry."

you nod and grab the tin he was looking at earlier. "this helps with that."

you scoop a bit onto your index finger and smooth it over his cheeks, forehead and temples. "there," you smile softly and cup his face in your palms. "now you'll be even softer, which I honestly didn't think was possible, but here we are." he's certain his pupils are heart-shaped at this point. your entire aura is tinted pink and red and there's cartoon hearts bubbling up around you. he wonders if you have a secret second quirk he doesn't know about or if the mind really is as powerful as they say.

he doesn't know how exactly to filter the intense emotions running through him as you continue to dote on him, so they just well up inside of him until he can't stop the quick and sap-filled "I love you so much," from bubbling out of his mouth.

you pause a little at how... thankful he sounds. you know that he isn't used to being pampered- not that he's ever explicitly stated that, you just kind of put two and two together based on his career and what he's told you of his past- but you hadn't realized how much it would affect him.

so you smile at him and tilt his face down to kiss his head, careful not to get any product on your lips. you return the sentiment, happy to be of service to him for once, and ignore the way your insides are turning to goop at his expression.

you'll have to dote on him more often. not only because you want to see him like this more often, but because you want- no, need to make up for all those years he must have felt discarded and used and overworked... he handles it well. he's accepted his duty and thrives in his field. you know he does, otherwise he would have snapped long before he met you, but... it hurts to realize that something as simple as skincare is enough to toss him into unknown territory.

once you're done with the moisturizer, you slip the panda headband off of him and blink away the tears threatening to fall. he's still wearing that appreciative expression, heart eyes and all, so you pull him close and wrap your arms around his shoulders.

"I love you more than you will ever know, keigo," you mumble into his neck. "don't ever doubt that, okay?"

his arms find their way around your waist and you feel him nod against your head. you reveal your face to him and press your forehead against his, gently nudging noses.

comfortable silence lingers for a bit before he whispers "you smell good."

you snort and pull back. "it's the moisturizer, it's pear scented. do you want to head to bed now? the counter is cold."

he nods again and picks you up, encouraging you to wrap your legs around him despite the fact that the distance from the washroom to your bed is only less than twenty steps.

as soon as you're both under the covers and he expels one of his feathers to turn the light off, you beckon him over to lay on your chest.

you tangle your fingers in his hair, gently massaging his scalp and tailing down to scratch the nape of his neck. he lets out a content sigh and he presses soft, sleepy kisses to any bare skin he can find without moving too much. you almost laugh at how quickly you're able to get him relaxed.

you know you'll miss his weight on your body by time you wake up- he'll be long gone for an early morning patrol. even so, at least you'll be comforted with the knowledge that he was able to get a good night's sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I love him :(

[katanablue]

Hear me out

Raph railing the living daylights out of you for your birthday, and eating your ass like its cake

Of course my friend doesnt follow this acc, of course im not specifically requesting this for them in particular 👀

(Cough cough hi sugar boo 😘)

MY DEEPEST APOLOGIES THAT THIS IS LATE

there’s no request for a spef Raph so naturally I must go with bay! Bc that guy??? Licks the plate CLEAN—

Warnings: fem reader, ass eating, fingering in the ass and brief mention of anal, he fucks your PUSS!!

“Happy birthday, baby. Got your present in my room.”

“Oh, Raph! You didn’t have to get anything for me.”

You miss the smirk on his lips since you turn to head down the hall, the glint in his eye and the way his tongue darts out his mouth.

“S’okay, sweetheart. I wanted to. Gotta spoil you, yeah?”

You turn to him as you sweep the curtain to his room aside, raising an eyebrow at him with a questioning smirk.

“Spoil me how?”

“Mmm fuck— oh fuck!”

He pushes your head further into the mattress, his hand nearly engulfing your skull as his tongue delves deeper into your hole. He shakes his head back and forth, curling the muscle and absolutely slobbering all over your cheeks, creating a big wet spot on the sheets beneath you.

Raph’s other hand grips your ass tight, definitely going to leave prints that’ll show in the later hours but right now he doesn’t care, right now he’s too focused on trying to reduce you to even an bigger quivering and whimpering mess.

He lets go of your head and comes to grab your other cheek, spreading both of them far apart and pulling back. He chuckles at the sight of your puckered hole clenching around nothing, already missing the shape of his tongue.

“So good f’me, you know that?” He grunts as he teasingly presses his thumb into your asshole, not enough to penetrate but just enough to have you squirming under him. “You and this tight l’il hole you got,”

He drops a glob of spit in between your parted cheeks, the warm sensation making you gasp and shudder as it slips further down. He quickly scoops it up with one finger and uses it as lube, pushing his thick digit in all the way to the first knuckle while he lines himself up with your sweet cunt.

“An’ you’re gonna take this cock like a good girl, yeah? S’your birthday present from me.” Ever so slowly he pushes in, inch by inch until he’s buried to the hilt, rubbing his palm up and down your back in a soothing gesture.

You claw at the bedsheets, arching yourself as he sunk into your soaking pussy, mewling and whimpering with every light brush of his fingertips against your hot skin.

He gives you a moment to adjust, knowing it wasn’t easy for you to take his massive length. He goes to massage your ass, running the blunts of his nails up and down your spine. He gently fingers your asshole, tempted to put another but once he sees you go barely lax, he clutches your hips and adjusts himself.

He plants one foot on the bed and immediately your eyes widen, looking over your shoulder to find him already giving you that shit eating smirk.

“Happy birthday, baby.”

His hold on you grows more firm before he starts fucking into you with no regard, grunting and muttering curses under his breath as you squeeze and suction onto his length. You can hardly get your moans out, and even if you could they’d be overshadowed by the sounds of his hips slapping against your ass.

You’re already so pent up from him eating your ass that you know you won’t last much longer. And when he removes his finger from your hole and sneaks around to start rubbing furiously at your clit, you can feel the band in your stomach tighten impossibly more.

“Mmmm Raph—!!”

“I know, can feel ya squeezing me, baby. Go ahead and come f’me, sweetheart. Birthday girl can do whatever she wants.” His free hand goes back to your skull, pushing your cheek to the bed for more leverage while pounding into you.

Your body jerks and twists, thighs threatening to close around his hand but he keeps you pried open while still thrusting into you. Merely a few seconds later you’re coming hard, your scream muffled by the sheets and your body attempting to push back while also trying to get away from his finger that’s still touching your sensitive clit.

He hums in satisfaction and pulls back, giving you a break and squeezing random parts of your body to calm you down. You’re breathing heavily, swallowing to quench your parched throat. With shaky arms you lift yourself and look back at him, finding that same cocky grin plastered on his lips.

“One down…” He slips his cock out, the empty feeling having you shiver. You gasp when you feel the head press against your ass, the tip just barely pushing in.

“Many more to go.”

[asexual-spongebob]

zadr headcanons! (Part 2.)

part 1 is here.

• Dib wraps his arms around Zim when he cooks. and gives him neck kisses. He probably got Z one of those “kiss the cook” aprons.

• Zim often shows his love for Dib through cooking/baking. Be like.

“I made you muffins!!! :D they’re ur favorite! strawberry! :3”

(Faltered.) “Aw… you didn’t have to do that for me.. o//o”

• Dib has tried to cook for Zim before, but it always ends in disaster. Zim appreciates the thought, tho.

• Dib gets really clingy when hes tired. he will not let Zim go. Same applies to Zim.

• Dib one of the few people to have ever seen Zim with gloves off, and thinks that his little toe beans are cute af (I hc that Irkens have those.) Zim becomes flustered anytime Dib gushes over his cute little toe beans. (He secretly likes it though. But don’t tell anyone that.)

(tw periods.)

• Zim takes care of Dib when he’s got cramps. He may not understand, but he still tries to help. Dib insists that every is fine (it’s not.) and Zim can see right through him. Be like:

“I’m fine! I promise!” (hes not.)

“Dib. Please shut up. You are BLEEDING. let me take care of you.” And then Dib finally gives in.

Zim will rub his back and stomach and stuff. And get him the heat pad. and give them all their favorite sugary foods. and plenty of painkillers. edit: I forgot to mention that Zim will also give dib kisses on his stomach to try and them feel better. Zim also gives him kisses on the forehead too.

Dib also takes care of Zim when he’s sick :) (theyre both gonna get sick at that rate.)

• Despite having a loving bf, they both still relapse sometimes. But they help each other out. (Ex: Zim wash Dib’s hair, Dib will help Zim get out of his slump. bc he knows what’s that’s like.)

• They both are terrified of cockroaches (despite zim being a literal space cockroach.) but Dib will get off his ass and take the damn thing outside or just kill it. And go “ERTEWDEEDWSF 😰” the whole time. And then Zim will disinfect everything like the clean freak he is.

• Zim lends Dib his coats and vice versa . they don’t like seeing the other cold.

• Zim is always like “miiiineee” when it hugs/ cuddles Dib.

• Dib bonks Zim with cardboard tubes.

• They break into each other’s windows and cuddle at night.

• Anytime Zim comes back Dib’s always like “ONG I MISSED U SM!! 0//0 :D” and hugs him like they haven’t seen xem in years. Zim’s like “I was only gone for twenty minutes Dibby…” same applies to Zim. • Sometimes spend time together in the bathroom during lunch. they just cuddle and kiss each other alone. And chat. Zim likes it because it’s nice and quiet, he usually feels overwhelmed.

• Zim steals Professor Membrane’s car despite not being legally old enough to drive on Earth yet. And him and Dib go for late night joy rides. (I mean. Zim can drive a spaceship. it would make sense for it to know how to drive a car.) they somehow don’t get caught by tge cops and they blast deftones and shit. and they go get food late night. usually suck monkeys (zim grew a tolerance to them.)

• Zim enjoys giving gifts to Dib. Dib does the same. • Zim did Dib’s top surgery as an early birthday present a few weeks before Dib turned 13. He poured many hours of research into it. (I mean… Z does dissections and shit. I’m sure he could figure how to do d’s top surgery lol.) Dib was very pleased. :)

• they made each other matching Kandi bracelets and “married.” (just like little kids do.) prof membrane thinks it’s cute. :)

• they have the most chaotic ass DM’s imaginable. 7-7

• Dib helps Zim apply eyeliner. their just like “Hold still mkay.” • Zim has nightmares about Foodcourtia and greasy food. But Dib is there to comfort xem.

• Dib is always like “UM. He asked for NO meat/cheese.” Anytime restaurants get Zim’s order wrong. And demands a refund. • Zim licks Dib to show affection. Dib thinks it very cute (and also weird. but he loves that stupid bug anyway.)

• the old insults they used for each other are now pet names. (ex: spaceboy, dib-worm. Etc.)

• Zim gave Dib their lungs back. (And gave Keef his eyes balls back.)

• Dib sometimes wakes up only to find black kiss marks all over him and hes just like “ziiiimmmm” 😭

• human saliva leaves behind kiss marks on Irken skin.

• Zim always tries to smell/look nice for Dib. Dib only tries if they’re on a fancy date or something.

• Zim is very high maintenance. Dib pretends to find it annoying but he secretly likes it.

• Zim’s lips constantly taste sweet because of all the goddamn sugar he eats. Dib likes it very much (they’d never admit or say that tho.)

• Zim started sleeping after it n dib got together (which was something that was only reserved for Tallests.)

• Zim has small stubby tail that xe usually keeps tucked into xyr clothes. But Dib thinks it’s adorable and tells xem that he doesn’t have to do that around him.

• Zim secretly likes Dib’s kind of stinky scent (hes not gonna admit that tho.) and finds it comforting.

(Even though Dib smells like fuckin onions and stale pizza rolls. With barely any deodorant and really shitty dollar store cologne that just makes him reek even more. Most of time. Sometimes he smells nice.)

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Kieran Kieran Kieran Kieran Kierannnnnn

Boi deserves more love cause he's truly one of the best characters in the entire franchise and they definitely did him justice with his story arc(Even if we made him get a ton of therapy and a near-death experience after his villain phase...)

With that, the fact that he can afford multiple tickets but not a phone is... Weird. However, that's where writers come in soooo- Can I please request the reader, Carmine, Paldea gang, and BB E4 throwing Kieran a surprise party and cashing in together to get him the lastest rotom phone with Applin/Hydrapple case?

Extra bonus if you're also able to include individual gifts that everyone would get Kiki

EXTREMELY BASED REQUEST <3333

......

One day it suddenly occurred to you, the BB E4, Carmine, and your Paldean friends that Kieran's 15th birthday was coming up and....according to his sister, he's never had a party.

You found that to be 100% unacceptable, and so you all decided to band together and plan one right in the League Club room.

Ofc you had to be sneaky about it, making it so that Kieran didn't suspect anything was up.

The biggest challenge--at least for the others--was figuring out what presents to give him.

But considering that he still doesn't have his own rotomphone (despite having more than enough money to get you, Arven, Penny, and Nemona plane tickets to Kitakami), it wasn't too difficult to decide what gift you wanted to get for him.

Luckily you had a Persian and Gholdengo who knew Pay Day and Make It Rain respectively and wore amulet coins, so you took them out to the terarium to battle other trainers, gathering more than enough cash to finally afford the gift.

When Kieran's birthday finally arrives...he's a little sad bc he only got a few wishes from random passerbys, and none from you or his friends or sister--who all seemed to have mysteriously vanished.

He thinks it's some prank and lowkey sulks as he shuffles to the clubroom....

Only to get startled when you all jump out and surprise him--with Ogerpon, Miraidon/Koraidon, and your Hydrapple (who was once the Applin he traded you) wearing party hats and kazoos--wishing him happy birthday.

Once his mini heartattack subsides, it takes a second for everything to sink in....before he gets extremely sappy and stands there with tears rolling down his face.

At first Crispin thinks he's genuinely upset and starts apologizing profusely, thinking the group had the wrong date-

"N-No, it's today. I'm just....wowzers.." Kieran laughs, wiping away his tears. "You all..really did this for me?"

"It took careful planning and precarious coordination." Amarys speaks up with a smile of her own. "We have [y/n] to thank for orchestrating this. But I could understand if it caused you some minor distress this morning."

He just waves her off, reassuring her that everything's good now, and soon the festivities commence!

You gift him the latest Rotomphone, having commissioned for it to have an Applin phonecase (even with its own tail and eyestalks) that shimmered in the sunlight, with all of the features offered by the League Club's BP system already unlocked.

Ofc, it may take him a while to learn how to use them all...but he's SO happy and hugs you tightly.

He lowkey forgot that everyone else got him a present, too, and lets you go to open them.

Carmine, knowing her brother, gave him an assortment of chocolate (but insisted that he didn't eat all of it at once and had actual food every now and then).

Amarys gave him a single heavy ball with a Shiny Aron inside. She doesn't think it's much but gets flustered when he smiles and thanks her with a hug, too.

Lacey gifts him a Granbull plushie, and at first she thinks it may be too "cutesy" for him, but he holds onto it tight and insists that he loves it.

Crispin and Arven got together to gift him a cookbook they collaborated on: half the recipes are spicy dishes and the other half contains sandwich recipes.

Drayton presents him with an empty friend ball, and inside was a Wimpod keychain and a note that basically says "sry for calling you ex-champ, ex-champ".

Fortunately they both kinda got over that grudge and could laugh about it now.

Penny got him the same Eevee backpack that she has (after recalling how he stared at it one too many times back in Kitakami and played with the ears when she left it unattended for a few mins) and initially feels awkward, but he adores it and promises to swap his old bag out from time to time.

Nemona gave him a whole bag of EV-boosting items (carbos, zinc, feathers, mints, you name it) for his team so their next battle could be even MORE exciting....and he's embarrassed to admit his competitive team's stats are already maxed out, but he'll use them for his casual team.

All in all, the party is a huge success.

It's definitely one Kieran would never forget, and he's so, so grateful to have real friends who did all of this for him--especially you.

[sil3ntfr34k]

Birthday Bakugou Headcanons

Yea I missed his birfday and he might be mad at me but it’s bbabygirl we still gonna write something

• Probably says some shit like “Oo I don’t like surprises” but then will act disappointed when you tell him your plans for him

• I.E.; Don’t tell him about his birthday plans

• You and the entirety of Class 3-A are going all out to make this the most outlandish and ridiculous birthday party of his life purely because y’all wanna annoy him

• Cut scene to you basically dragging him all around the city after school to stall time so everyone can set up the decorations

• As SOON as you get that “We’re ready” text you gotta drag him back kicking and screaming because he’s overstimulated. Bakugou is DREADING stepping a single foot into the dorms because he just KNOWS something is up

• As expected, as soon as Bakugou opens the door; everyone screams and pops those streamers directly in his face, which is quickly followed with a couple of deadly explosions

• Thankfully most of the decorations survived 💪

• You better believe that cake is big asf, big thanks to Sato who whipped it up in the kitchen for Bakugou 🙏

• All the girls had to cook the dinner bc NONE of the boys can cook expect Bakugou, and it would be rude to make Bakugou cook his own birthday dinner. The girls made him some spicy mapu tofu with some bottle labeled as ‘Devils Tears’. The color is a bright red to show how spicy it is, but ofc Bakugou is still going to complain it’s not spicy enough

• Bakugou resents having to open presents, way too nervous of how he’s supposed to react. At least when he’s with his parents they don’t expect much of a reaction since they know he’s pretty stoic.

• Calls every present he gets shit, but still gets defensive if anyone tells him to regift it. He appreciates the gifts, he just has a hard time giving reactions most people want.

• Still doesn’t stay up late for the party. WILL just stand up and go to his room to get ready for bed.

• Cue everyone following him to his room because they don’t want him to sleep yet, it’s Friday man just stay up a little longer!

• Has to blast everyone out and lock his door.

• What no one knows is that he actually does stay up longer, he just wanted some alone time to recover and actually enjoy his presents and kind letters. He probably just skimmed over the words at first, but now that he’s alone and can think straight he takes time to read each one carefully

• Might be a little OOC but he probably cries JUST A LIL BIT bc he’s never had so many care enough about him to throw him such a big party AND want him to stay up with them

• If he got games or something, he’ll stay up and play them for a bit. Same with manga and other trinkets, like exercise equipment and small figurines (of all might)

•Bonus points if someone gives him a personalized gift like a drawing or hand crafted sculptures. Is low key a WEAK SUCKER for personalized items

Okay that’s all I can think of

[bird-likes-to-fandom]

"People have names on pretend birthdays, too." "You could call yourself Ezra," "What's an Ezra?" "It's a very special name from a very special person. You could have him, if you'd like." "Can Ezra have the curliest hair?" "Of course he can." "... Ezra, with the Curliest Hair."

drawn for day 6 of the @june-doe-event - Swapped roles! I have an actual AU that I've been thinking about for the past week or two, and I'm going to talk about it below.

Ocean - The Most Imaginative Girl in Town. She's doomed from the start. she imagines a better world, a world where she's a leader and everything goes the way she wants it to. But in reality, she "will never leave this town at all," so to speak. During her time in the warehouse, she taps into the side of her in canon that feels distraught and helpless, the part that spirals into the "we're all just starfarts!" rhetoric. Due to her being so religious, she understands that this was the time for her to die, she's just having a REALLY hard time accepting it. She concedes not because she wants to, but because she knows this is her end. Her song is a poppy tune with secretly dismal lyrics about how no matter how hard you try, death is inevitable. Noel - The Most Ambitious Boy in Town. His ambitions to get to France are very strong in this AU. He works insanely hard to get out of Uranium. He didn't get to have a life where he was himself, poetic and out in the open, and that's his main drive for wanting to go back. I think his song is pretty much the same as in canon. Mischa - The Most Romantic Boy in Town. Mischa was adopted into a good adoptive family who decided they were going to give this obviously troubled teenager a safe, stable home. They provided him with a trusting, loving space, and his adoptive father taught him how to play the acoustic guitar. Mischa still finds Talia online through youtube and their relationship is the same. Instead of hip hop and rap, he mostly writes love songs and Ukrainian folk music. Instead of two songs, he has one about Talia and his love for her and need to be with her.

John Doe - In this AU, Ricky is a John Doe. The authorities were from out of town and wanted everything to be over with, and didn't understand ASL, so Ricky was left unidentified. His head is an astronaut helmet with cat ears that he made himself (sculpted the ears out of foam and clay and glued them to a normal helmet before painting it purple) Before his song, Ricky usually signs rather than speaks. Penny is the only choir member to understand ASL because it was taught in Elysium, which means that the rest of the choir can't understand Ricky unless she's interpreting. He has no voice and he doesn't know why. Ricky's song is about feeling misunderstood with no way to be understood, because he doesn't know who he is. He can't voice his feelings because he doesn't know them.

Penny - The Nicest Girl in Town. The town perceives her as "easy", easiest to bully, easiest to forget, easiest to ask for the science homework from. They label her as the nice one bc she's gullible enough to fall for it. Swap Penny is a pushover, and her need to be liked is much more prevalent here. She's desperate for positive attention, and her bullies label her the nice one to get away with using her. Her song is more about her life and how there's so much more to her than what the town perceives her as. She still has her dolly in this AU, and gives her to John as a birthday present. She and John actually become good friends throughout the course of the warehouse.

Constance - The Angriest Girl in Town. She was treated the same way she was in canon, but in death she lets loose and reveals her true emotions about everything. She's done with being a doormat. She's dead! Who cares anymore? She's dead and she spent her life catering to Ocean, and she's not going to spend the afterlife the same way. Constance says "fuck it" and lets her real self show, and I love her for that. She gets two songs - one that's really just a big vent session, with a punk rock theme where she gets to just let loose, and Sugar Cloud, where she talks about how life wasn't all terrible. I think she still has her realization in the middle of death that life was worth loving, it just comes along with realizing that life is both the good and the bad, that it's okay and even deserved to be angry.

[mymontage]

hello! i’m val, and i’m coming in hot w three muses: yuchan, seowon (@virtuepoint sideblog), and saebi (@jennysaykwa sideblog)! super excited to be here and to present to you 1/3: kim yuchan, remedy’s main rapper with an overwhelming longing for something more. like this post to plot, and i’ll message you! ims & discord are ok!

yuchan’s the eldest brother, and it’s that that made him an idol. his little sister, yusin, has dreamt of it her whole life but she dips when some girls from her idol academy intimidate her… it’s funny how life works out.

before that, though, yuchan is clasically trained. he’s a pianist, and he’s not a natural. yuchan was boyish and clumsy but his parents basically put their two kids in the care of their piano teacher, so he was basically forced to get good…

kevin yoon scouts yuchan at one of his piano recitals, and he promises yuchan with creative freedom– being able to write and produce and sing his own songs.

truth be told, yuchan’s never been a natural at anything except for producing and writing lyrics. he takes five years to nurture the “idol” skills, and some ppl might even say that he’s the main rapper bc he’s the one that wrote the songs, but regardless…

he sits in remedy’s producer seat comfortably for a little while, until the midas acquisition happens and he gets pushed as a soloist.

yuchan starts growing as a soloist. he’s self-produced, and he’s proud of himself. for the first few comebacks, yuchan sticks to the dance-type beats, but remedy’s sound starts to change and that creates some… dissonance for him. ofc, he loves his brothers remedy, but yuchan’s found the artist that he wants to be w this push from midas…

yuchan’s about to make the shift from dance-type kpop soloist to fully khh, but he’s struggling because he knows that he’s not viewed as that within both his fandom and the public… midas is on his ass trying to persuade him to clock in solo… both sides contradict what he truly wants. yuchan is #stuck, pls humor the little successful kpop boy group soloist-producer-writer for a second :-(

personality-wise, yuchan is like a black cat looking up at u w big eyes. he’s very reserved, a little bit too serious… reminds me of this quote “and no one can figure out what you want, and you won’t tell them”

thinks rly hard about what to write in birthday cards or when he gives his albums to his peers. ends up w some “Every journey begins with a single step – well done for taking that step and all the best for your continued travels.”

wcs

younger sibling figures i think would work rly well w yuchan… mentorship, somebody that reminds him of his little sister, there’s a lot we can do w this!!

also, remedy brothers. a member who’s holding onto him or feels conflicted w him and his future or a member who’s encouraging him to go for it/come back to focus on remedy…

he’s taught u how to produce n write lyrics and soon enough u become his pride n joy n etc… people who see the similarities between him and kevin yoon and they’re like okay this is a little uncanny

ppl he’s written and produced for and everytime ur reading his lyrics u find urself w an eyebrow raised, like, is everything ok at home?

somebody the polar opposite of him, yet they work well with each other. he grounds them and reminds them to take a breather n they encourage him to pop that bubble of his…

somebody who looked up to him n is trying to Know know him for who he rly is. breaking his walls n etc.

book club!!! reading friends!!! yuchan has rly been getting into reading lately, and he’s willing to give you recommendations if you give him yours. same goes for films, too! 🤔 he’s just rly artsy and wants friends to geek out w!

ppl who have worked w him before, n thinks he’s a Pleasure to work with bc he’s a visionary and knows exactly what will make the track sound perfect… or ppl who have worked w him before and thinks. wow this guy is picky and doesn’t even bother to talk to me after the recording sessions? ok…

[marigoldbaker]

I dont know your girls, but tell us 17. how do they celebrate their birthday?

HI THANKS !!! <33

marigold keeps trying to con people out of remembering that it’s her birthday because she can’t handle positive attention despite craving it constantly and she doesn’t want people to go out of their way for her despite also craving that constantly. so she will be that girl going “oh i don’t want a celebration!!!!! it’s fine!!!!” when she actually kinda does lowkey but has 87 psychological problems. her mom and sisters have danced this dance for 12 years though so they very patiently ignore her when she does this and just put on a really cute and small party (family only, plus jaheira’s kids every so often) with an exorbitant amount of really silly gifts. sofie’s gifts are always new drafts of magic recipes inspired by marigold and they always make marigold extremely emotional.

evie uhhhhh . Oh man. does she even know when her birthday is? her mind is kinda soup by the time canon happens. i think when she finds it out again she’s probably supremely indifferent and astarion is like GODS i have to do EVERYTHING around here and figures out a way to throw her an extremely extravagant party on ye olde brother’s credit card. she does in fact ditch this party with him to sit on the roof and throw hunks of birthday cake at all the fancy guests he invited. ideal times for evie

birthdays are a little hard on roslin with her family in another city, so the actual date she was born is a family only secret bc she gets a little twitchy if customers start wishing her a happy birthday. the bakery ladies put on a much more lowkey version of the marigold party (the nice wine is brought out and everyone makes something fun for dinner) and everyone gives ros a single present that she probably cries over for like 10 minutes. very sweet.

lenora’s birthday is some sort of deranged affair because when she was 9 and moved to live with thea she refused to admit she had a birthday, so thea had to use all of her governmental connections to figure out norie’s birthday and subsequently figure out how to sneak attack norie with a celebration. her version of a sneak attack was probs just a surprise cake but she explained the concept to ros and mari and they got. Overzealous. so every year the bakery ladies act like they’ve forgotten norie’s birthday, they don’t remember norie’s birthday, and then WHAM someone dumps an industrial tub of confetti on lenora while she’s trying to go into the kitchen (which marigold has used illusory magic to turn into a giant ballroom full of presents.) norie LOVES THIS bc she gets to complain and moan and pretends she hates it and also she gets presents and the attention of her sisters. Wins across the board.

thea wasn’t planning to mention her birthday to anyone, but her daughters asked jaheira about it. jaheira actually already knew when it was, which thea did NOT know about because jaheira has never gotten her anything for her birthday and paired it with an actual verbal “happy birthday,” so when every other year or two jaheira would randomly give her a new weapon or some rare ingredients on her birthday & then immediately leave, she’d just be like. Does she know??? no she can’t. But does she????

the girls like surprising thea but ros and mari have zero subtlety. norie COULD pull off a surprise but really doesn’t care enough to try bc she knows thea is expecting it every year. they like to take thea for a picnic by the chionthar with a bunch of her favorite pastries (that she taught them to make) and goof around and talk about all the fun stuff they got up to over the last year. all of thea’s presents are always handmade (mari usually makes her a long term preservable snack that is both magical and delicious, norie embroiders her something, ros also embroiders her something which is a real labor of love because ros fucking hates embroidery and is very bad at it).

[zyafics]

as much as i love happy endings… how do you treat someone so shitty while they’re carrying your fucking child, and then shut them out. I get that he’s acting all romantic and stuff right now in the present but that doesn’t mean anything, it just feels like he’s just stubborn and used to getting what he wants and his obsession rn is her, like do u even kno what love is cameron???????? fuck ur birthday weekend bitch; like it actually hits a little too close to home (not to blame him bc he doesn’t kno) but to be out like partying while she takes care of your sick fucking child is crazy, men actually aren’t shit like they’re so clueless and dumb… anyways i trust u zya, so i know it’ll work out in the end but 😣

okay, look. as much as i love how defensive and protective everyone is about reader, i have to play on the offense for right now. JUST to contextualize my characterization of rafe and why he did what he did.

rafe is definitely in the wrong from his inability to communicate, to his lack of communication, and everything in between. but i have to give him props for how much he's trying to navigate all this space. like i said before, how i wrote his "ur my girlfriend" line, it wasn't with ill-intent. it was just him trying to vocalize and process his thoughts (which we've seen him do several times before in notes app + with his friends/family). this is just a wrong delivery at the wrong time. and i fear all of us are also very sensitive (me included don't get me wrong 😭).

in addition, with his recent (past) convos with barry and sarah and wheezie, he is expressing his emotions a bit better and what he truly feels. he tells wheezie he's trying to take care of reader and he truly is. he tells sarah he is frustrated and resentment of reader but he doesn't want to be. and implicitly, he's demonstrating with barry that he doesn't want to go home to reader because he's afraid of blowing up at her—of hurting her. however, all these choices are done without direct communication to reader which hurts her regardless.

i think at the end of the day, rafe is trying his best not to hurt reader while also navigating his complex emotions. and it sucks that he doesn't communicate in the past, but honestly, he's doing the best he can within the frame of who he is.

i'm not all for defending him, but as long as i have written it where u guys can actually see where he's coming from, i'm all good. you can hate him by the end of the series, but if you at least understand him, i think i did a pretty successful run of hb:l!rafe cameron 🙂‍↕️

but, to answer ur question (bc i think i didn't), rafe acting romantic and stuff now in the present could be interpret as him being stubborn and his obsession with her, but i actually see it as him maturing enough to know what he wants and willing to get it. remember he said his plans to barry? remember when topper asked him why now? we'll get there.

[imeriayapping]

hey ohmygosh all ur wips sound so cool :)

if you don't mind I'd love to hear abt ur colton x logan uni au and the lando + loscar please <3

Okay so Colton and logan one started totally just as my delusion when i started getting into indycar and connected dots that didn't even exist, like only time of them even being at the same place that i found so far was 2012 supernational karting competition in Vegas. at least they follow eachother on insta which is something

But they make so much sense to me. Fratboy logan that got dragged to a garage concert by his best friend Kyle????where kyle plays on guitar in the same band as Colton???? And Kyle makes them interact???? It works so well.

Also calm logan + drama queen Colton is just a chief kiss of a dynamic on top of indy grange band drummer x frat boy

I'm thinking on making a subplot of them doing karting together without knowing who the other one is so then when they find out (while talking like normal when they have hangouts together with kyle or something, generally just talking to eachother normally) they r like????? IT'S YOU???

But i didn't think further than that yet so here you go :p

And for another one - it's pretty simple, loscar are in relationship from even before f1 started. Oscar also have some form of crush on lando and logan is aware of it and ok with it. Lando is kinda bad with defining platonic feelings from romantic ones but he likes oscar well enough either way.and he's kinda indifferent about Logan, like sure they know eachother since forever but it never was close, just acquaintances.

And then Logan does a thing like landing him his glasses because room they are in or giving his headphones when it's end of the day and everything is loud in a bad way. It's very confusing to lando so he goes to logan to ask (using returning his glasses as an excuse) and Logan just simply sais that it's just little things that he remembers from their time in karting and oscar likes lando very much so he tries to make some effort too, and it's not like that's too much work, just little details to remember.

But it does mean a lot to lando bc dealing with adhd is hard and even these little things help enormously. So he in turn start paying attention to Logan too, noticing how sweet and caring he is. And then oscar gives him a present for his birthday and it contains his favourite childhood candies and lando is very confused how oscar can possibly know about them and he just says that logan helped him prepare the present.

It feels lando with so much affection for both of them that he wants to explode and that was his clue that feeling that he have for both of them for quite some time probably aren't platonic anymore

And with time after that realisation all their hangouts start include more cuddles and some kisses later on too

[jovenshires]

💛Smoshblr December Asks Final Day💙

We‘ve done it! We’ve finally reached the end of this lil ask game and also the end of 2023! 🥳 Thank you so much for joining in on this, I truly appreciate it so much 🫶! I wish you a wonderful start into the new year and that all your hopes and dreams for 2024 will come true! ✨💞

But, since the year isn’t quite over yet, I thought this might be a nice time to reminisce a little bit. Therefore, the final question of the Smoshblr December Asks Game:

What are your favourite smosh-related memories of 2023? 💖

(no specific amount required for this one; and you can ofc also include older smosh memories, if you want to 🤗)

oh my god........ im emotional fr. this was so, so, SO much fun and stella, i will speak for EVERYONE you sent these asks to when i say that we are all so grateful to YOU for organizing it. you brought the community together in such an amazing way, asking us thought-provoking and interesting questions, a lot of which i never would have thought to ask. and yet i got to learn all my mutuals' answers anyway!!! it made me feel like i really got to know everyone, even the people im too scared to start a convo with bc i am a Coward. i love you, we all adore you, thank you SO much, and i cant wait to see where smoshblr goes in the new year now that we are all closer than ever <3<3<3<3<3

okay so...... okay okay okay okay HERE we go. im gonna put it under the cut bc this got SO long but if you want a tl;dr summary, please by all means go check out this video i made at the beginning of the month bc. it sums it up tbh.

making all of my amazing friends: i am literally. an emotional wreck just thinking ab this. anyway. i've already been sappy enough this year (from my christmas presents to my many many personal posts and asks that are just. me talking about how much i love these people), but i would still be remiss if i didn't mention my beautiful, wonderful friends. im not gonna tag them all here - it'd be too many and you all know who you are <3<3<3 - but to everyone i've dmed for hours on end, or talked to in replies, or mutuals i've never even spoken to at all, or anons who come into my askbox and just have the most wonderful interactions with me, i am so, so eternally grateful. i made new friends; i reconnected with one of my best friends in the WHOLE world; i met some people who i never would have spoken to otherwise and found such an incredible community. i love you all so so SO much (yes ALL of you even if you think im not talking ab you if you're reading this i AM), and i am so excited to see what happens with all of us next. love you all. mwah. <3

domo day/my birthday: oh my god. OHHHH my god. literally the fic that brought me back to this fandom. i am not crying its fine im FINE. domo - aka dancing on my own - was a passion project from the very start. i thought, 'well, no one will wanna read this niche lil fic that im writing just to deal with My very personal trauma about an rpf ship that no one cares about.' (mind you i started it before i even posted right side, so, like, i literally thought it was just me standing on a deserted island.) and then five or six months later... there we were. i posted it on my birthday (bc i Live for drama !) and god. the amount of love and support i got that day was... everything to me. when i said this was a passion project, i mean that it was truly one of the first things i sat down and wrote For Myself, without giving a fuck what anyone else would think. it was something i poured my heart and soul into because i needed to read it. and when other people started to reach out - telling me how much they related, how much they got from it, how much it meant to them. then there was the analyses of it from everyone,,,, not to mention the birthday love. my birthday is a HUGE thing for me, and, as i told you at the time, you were the very first person to wish me a happy birthday stella (with that incredible moodboard that i think of frequently........ the rat.........). and then kit went and published bad idea and gifted it to ME which was such an incredible and treasured gesture and... truly some of my irls forgot to wish me a happy birthday so. im just so honored and i love you all so much. thank you for loving me and my dearest darling daughter domo <333333

shaynse day: this literally isn't even about me, it's honestly about nat, but this changed my brain chemistry and i think everybody's tbh. it was the way that the MOMENT the love is blind video dropped, we all gathered around my blog to hold hands, sing kumbaya, and all hail the shaynse anon (aka now shaynse founder nat). they had their third eye OPEN. and everyone had to come check on them to make sure they were okay. that meant so much to me. not only did it mean that enough people were reading my blog that an anon had their own niche subset of a fan base, but it was truly like. one of the best displays of fandom togetherness i've ever seen. we were all so united that day. god bless november 19th, aka shaynse day, my FAVORITE national holiday.

gedits: i really Dont think i have to explain this one. this is one of my favorite bits (but also its not really a bit and i genuinely wanna fuck that old man). making thirst traps for garrett? oh my god. stroke of actual genius. once again another day we all came together, held hands, and decided we were ALL gonna be garrett fuckers. long live gedits. they will never stop and im NOT sorry about it.

the bsf fan art: i have literally never had fan art made for my fic before...... i screamed and cried and threw up when someone made fan art for the bed-sharing fic. furry-jackson is my hero and this fan art lives in my mind RENT FUCKING FREE. it truly imprinted itself on my brain and i think about it all the time. thanks so much to them for loving i could be the reason as much as i do <3333

the top ten dynamics poll: !!!!! my baby!!!! i truly thank you all so much for indulging me by voting in that silly lil poll. it was so SO interesting to see the way the dynamics stacked up. not to mention, it also got me into gif-making again!! that was the first time i'd made gifs in ages, especially gifs i was proud of. but i love that silly lil gif series so much, one of my favorite projects of the year, so thank you all <3

smoshblr december asks: i mean. i said it all up top, but it's worth mentioning again. this was so, so, SO much fun, and it must have been such hard work for you, and i am honored that you did all this work for US of all people when you are so busy and talented and working so hard just in like. YOUR LIFE. honestly, this whole section could just be called 'stella,' bc i am so, so grateful for you especially coming into my life this year. whether we're working together on fic or just chatting about our lives or shouting back and forth about why EVERY taylor swift song is in fact a spommy song, i am just so lucky to have you and i love you so, so much. you always tolerate my shenanigans and i am SO incredibly lucky to have you as a friend. anyway. yeah i love you and smoshblr december asks so there.

[threehuskiesinatrenchcoat]

!!!!! HI !!!!!

You‘ve seen the beginning of this and I hope you‘ve forgotten about it so u can read it again now!

This time I tried my hand at angst? Kinda? Also this is sort of inspired by the cyberpunk au but also knowing nothing about cyberpunk won’t hinder anyone from having a cry /hj jk i don’t think i‘ll actually make anyone cry with this but rest assured i‘m trying

Maybe one day I‘ll know enough computer jargon to make an actual cyberpunk au lmao

It’s also a lot of words? Like 2000<, which is not as much as the transformer au but definitely more than usual

Anyways, this is not a birthday gift bc it’s not your birthday why did i even clarify that so enjoy!

It took a lot of maneuvering to pull Graves’ heavily burned body out of the wreck. His limp form was a pitiful sight, skin either an angry red or dusty grey depending on where the fire and where the ash had gotten to him. Some of his implants had survived the explosion, others dug into his flesh, half molten and irreparable. Alejandro wondered how willing the Brits would be in actually hearing Graves out should he survive - and the colonel was sure he’d make it. It’s what he always did: endure and conquer. A picture of the other’s self-assured grin flashed in his mind. Alejandro sighed heavily, dark eyes cataloguing the most life-threatening injuries as the unconscious man got carried towards the base. The sun was close to setting, making everything glow in an orange light as if aflame once more.

While he watched his men leave with their cargo and thoughts about the future started to creep into his head. What would happen to Graves? Los Vaqueros would follow his command. If he wanted him to get treatment, they’d give it to him. The Brits, though? They might argue whose custody he was under, so to say. Seeing as they had worked with Sheppard more closely and were actively hunting him, they might want to get the info first, stabilize him second. Alejandro knew he was letting his own bias blind him, but Graves should get a fighting chance, a chance to make things right.

They’d need to check his chip at the very least, anyways; make sure his brain wouldn’t immediately shut down once they tried to wake him up. Until they came back, Alejandro would make sure the former commander survived. Besides his obvious use, the Mexican wasn’t able to rid himself completely of the fondness he held for the other man and probably never would. Taking a deep breath, he collected himself. There was no time to worry about something he couldn’t change right now. Los Vaqueros needed him; las Almas needed him. It was time to take care of his responsibilities. With one last glance towards the medical wing, he steeled himself and went to find Rodolfo. They had a lot to discuss.

He was a doll. Graves was a doll. The news didn’t really want to register in his mind, but there it was, black on white. He had a chip and everything. It had gotten activated recently, very recently. The pad’s screen started flickering as Alejandro applied more and more pressure, unable to handle his anger any other way. Luckily, his second in command took it from him with an order to calm down before they’d discuss it. The colonel left wordlessly and did just that.

Multiple destroyed test dummies and equipment later, he returned. Their conversation didn’t last long, everyone present knowing just what those chips did, having seen them in action at a few cartel raids already. The general consensus was that Graves was innocent, the Brits reluctantly agreeing as well when being told of the newly discovered circumstances. His state was still unstable, but he wouldn’t be held accountable for everything he had done while not being himself once he woke up. The scope of his involvement would have to get sorted out first, of course, and Alejandro hoped it to be minimal.

The walkie talkie hanging from his hip cackled to life. It was Graves, he had woken up. After alerting Rudy, giving him a short explanation and requesting his presence in the medical area as well, he found himself standing in front of the American’s assigned room. He took a deep breath to calm himself, his breathing almost echoing in the quiet and empty hallway only broken up by faint beeping sounds and medical equipment standing to the side. Reaching out, he slowly pushed down on the cold door handle and stepped in.

He looked so small and vulnerable, skin pale and face gaunt. Alejandro slowly got closer, eyes transfixed on the figure getting swallowed by the stark white bedding. Coming to a stop at about stomach height, he almost didn’t dare to take a proper look at the other’s face. Graves’ lower body was completely covered by the blanket, but what was visible of his upper body looked painful. His stomach had been blown open and sewn shut again, his right arm had to be removed completely and his left one was missing the blade. Wires had been bundled together and secured to the remaining arm, probably so they wouldn’t snag on something should he move. The Mexican didn’t want to imagine how much agony he must be in; or would be if he wasn’t high on painkillers. The drip bag connected to Graves only half full, having hung there for a while already.

Something moved in his periphery and his eyes snapped upwards to where Graves was staring at him. The other blinked again and his breath hitched. Alejandro just stared back, now faced with what he’d been avoiding for the past few weeks. The American’s empty stare, dull in unrecognition, but still so very blue, moved slowly towards the door when Rudy stepped in. He seemed to barely notice movement; his reaction seemingly more instinct than willful action. Alejandro wondered how long he’d have to stand still for Graves to think of him as part of the room.

Rodolfo’s gaze swept the room before landing on the colonel, but Alejandro didn’t dare take his eyes off the man lying in front of them, scared he’d miss when he’d pass out and look no better than a corpse again. “How is he?” Rudy obviously tried to talk as soft as possible, but Graves still flinched. Something like fear flickered in his eyes. It was to be expected, seeing as the other man had taken part in taking him down and who knew how damaged the chip had gotten during the explosion.

Alejandro tried matching the other’s tone, already dreading the injured man’s reaction. “He hasn’t talked yet, but I’ve only been here a couple minutes.” In his periphery, he saw Rodolfo nodding in understanding, but his focus was on Graves, Phillip, who’s gaze was resting on him again. Brows furrowed and frowning slightly, he looked as if he was concentrating, His remaining hand spasmed and Alejandro slowly reached for it. The American’s arm was light, missing a good chunk of it, but when he gently squeezed his hand, it felt as if the other was trying to reciprocate it.

His heart fluttered with hope. Maybe they’d be able to talk to him soon; make him understand that he was safe. It must’ve shown on his face, because after a moment of quiet, Rodolfo patted his shoulder and left the room with a soft “Don’t stay too long, Ale.” He nodded, not taking his eyes from Graves’, imagining, hoping the spark in them was recognition.

Phillip’s condition wasn’t improving. The doctors were at a loss, calling his survival a miracle already and deeming him a lost cause. Every time he woke up, the most he did was track people’s movement with his eyes and occasionally twitch when one of the loose wires in his enhancements caught a spark. Alejandro tried visiting him as often as possible, until Rodolfo stepped in and practically dragged him out of the room, scolding him. He knew it wouldn’t get better, almost two months of no change proved that. Graves’ brain basically short-circuited, at least that’s how others had tried explaining it to him. Even his breathing wasn’t completely automated anymore, sometimes just stopping without rhyme or reason and having to be supplemented with a machine hooked up to his respiratory system. Day after day, Alejandro’s hope grew more and more cold, into a black hole at the center of his heart. He wouldn’t, couldn’t, let it go, but it was eating him up from the inside.

“They’re here. Vamos, let’s not keep them waiting.” Alejandro nodded and rose from his seat. Graves’ eyes were on him in an instant. It hurt, seeing him like this, but after Rudy’s intervention, he tried concentrating on his work more. It proved futile, so he took his work to the place his thoughts were circling around anyway. It might be a bit of a hassle to walk the extra distance between his office and the medical wing, but he got his work done and that was the important bit. He put any sensitive documents away, before walking towards the yard.

The Brits came for a visit. Everyone knew the reason for it was laying unresponsive in a medical bed, but they’d claimed to have a plan; not necessarily to get him to talk, but to get the information they needed. Alejandro didn’t like the sound of that. His suspicions turned out to be justified when 141 explained their brilliant plan was to reactivate the chip. The ensuing discussion and subsequent dismissal of Alejandro’s arguments against the method were a given. It might’ve ended differently if Graves had been lucid and recovering, but his current state just encouraged the others in their decision. “He won’t feel a thing, colonel, calm down. At this point he’s as good as dead, anyways.”

Alejandro insisted on being present during the procedure. He watched as they transferred his body onto the operation table, strapping him in. It was expected he might wake up and have the chip take control again. That thought alone made the Mexican’s hairs stand on end. Having Graves finally awake, not as himself, but an imposter, a mere puppet for Sheppard; it stung. Once they started hooking him up to the cables, that was when Alejandro began to have his doubts. He hadn’t wanted this for Graves; hadn’t from the very beginning, but now he started to realize; it was really going to happen. He took a shaky breath. Rodolfo noticed and put a calming hand on his shoulder. It didn’t help as much as he needed it to.

The room’s white walls, floor, lights, white everything didn’t let Graves look any healthier, his skin almost blending in with its surroundings. The whirring of the machines grew louder, the computer running its programs to access the chip. Alejandro saw the diagnostics popping up on the displays, even as digitally inept as he was, it was clear those numbers weren’t good. Graves’s heartbeat picked up significantly as one of the monitors flickered to life, showing Shepard’s face on a computer screen. It was too quiet for Alejandro to make out the words spoken, but he monitors view flicked to the side momentarily, showing the inside of a moving vehicle and the prairie running past the window, before lowering again towards Shepard. The plan was working, they were seeing Graves’ memories.

It took only a moment for everything to go sideways. The man strapped to the operation table started twitching violently, straining against the belts holding him down. Then, the screaming began. Alejandro had heard a lot of screams in his career; People being tortured by the cartel, people he had to get information from himself, dying people in the street, or their loved ones mourning the corpses, but this scream was one of the worst ones. Had someone told him Graves was getting stripped of his skin and doused in acid, he would’ve believed it. He thrashed stronger with each passing minute, throwing his head from side to side. Alejandro hadn’t even noticed himself moving, but one minute he was behind a glass wall, the next he stood next to Phillip, trying to hold him down. Soothing words were useless with how loud the other was yelling, but it didn’t stop him from murmuring them anyways.

From one moment to the next, Graves went quiet. The doctors present wasted no time securing the belts, tying the American down tighter and assessing the damage. Alejandro simply stared back into the other’s eyes that had settled on him with a horror-stricken expression. He didn’t know what to do. Graves looked so scared, his mouth opening and closing multiple times before settling back into a frown. Alejandro tried smiling at him as calmly as he could, sort of failing, but he didn’t care how weird his face looked, because it got Phillip to react.

The American whined pitifully, that’s all you could really call it. It sounded like the precursor to a truly horrible crying session, but not so much as a single tear left Graves’ eyes. They looked more grey than blue in the harsh operation table lighting and Alejandro couldn’t help but wish to see them in the sun if only for a moment. “A’jandro” Even just his name sounded painful to say and the Mexican put his hand over the other’s bound one.

“Save your energy. You need to recover, not talk. Please, Phillip, just get better.” He looked truly pitiful, staring up at him from that table with pale skin and a desperation in his eyes, one could think he was dying. Graves shook his head slowly, gaze never leaving Alejandro. Lips pressed together; he began tearing up, tears rolling down his cheek. The Mexican wiped them away, startled by how cold his skin was. The other man opened his mouth again, but only a painful wheeze left it as his gaze grew distant, unfocused eyes wandering to the side. “Hey, no, don’t leave again, you need to stay, don’t leave me, Phillip.” But his pleas fell on deaf ears, as he looked around, searching for something to help, anything to bring him back. The consistent peeping tone finally registered in his mind.

HJKGSDFSLIUYHIHEGKIL????????????????????? AEUGHGGSFG???????? okay listen. listen. when i see you irl i am legally obligated to punch you in the face (maybe with my mouth) because i feel so much lovehate for it it's unbelievable (in all the good ways) i SWEAR. when i told you about my cyberpunk au-crossover thingy i kinda expected it to be just me sharing my brainrot ideas i haven't even posted anything for it here yet but youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu im crying screaming throwing up foaming at the mouth im SO so normal i swear please believe me

[thepolyamorouspolymath]

Ok, so I may have buried the lead there on my life as to why no one has heard from me in forever -- first thing is because my every weekend is being spent with the guy that every guy I've ever gushed about pretended to be. I'm going to call him Bard, bc he will LOVE that. Yes, this guy is great enough I am even giving him a loving handle here.

It's not even like big huge shit -- he's just honest, and reassuring, and considerate, and respects me, and he listens and he coddles me on the shit that's not really important to make me feel secure while standing up to me on the shit that is to find a compromise (like his schedule sucks, and his two days off he hosts DND every other week and has band practice the other, and I'm like there's no time for me, just fitting me in -- didn't drop either but we agreed to pause them for 6 weeks to give us time to spend together to make me feel secure, and then I could come with or hang out in the other room if I chose, and non DND weekends or sometimes Saturdays can be spent at my place, not always his. Like he wants us both to have our lives but he gets I'm scarred and so willing to show me first -- with a clock -- that I matter by giving me a window to settle in). He met my older kids and brought Oldest a birthday present, and Boy Thing had been giving shit about the last guy who wanted to impress him sent a fruit basket. This adorable man had no clue what goes in a fruit basket (his first thought were melons) or what fruit baskets were so he bought the apples and oranges and kiwis and put them in a medium laundry basket. Boy Thing straight up laughed out loud at the sight, it was perfect. Every time he left my room, he'd be gone like at least half an hour -- the bathroom is like a 90 second walk max -- bc he and Oldest would get chatting about gaming.

He tells me I'm sexy and I'm beautiful but he also compliments things like how I make him feel understood, how I communicate. He knows I'm perfectly capable of defending myself if insulted or offended but also doesn't think I should ever have to.

And yes, the sex is fantastic and in a way that's fucking revelatory. He tries my kinks even if he's internally a bit iffy on the idea, bc he trusts its OK if he stops as soon as he doesn't like something (thankfully he's liked them all so far, initiating them at times now.) I had to red bc of something he said while I was going down on him, after trying to convince myself I was overreacting (bc honestly it was nothing bad, and would normally not have even fucking blipped my radar) and when I did, he immediately dropped out of the scene and sex and into taking care of me and what was it that triggered me and what came up and not only did I not get any pressure but not even any guilt -- like I knew he meant every word that all he cared about was me. I can initiate with him without feeling paralyzing fear of rejection bc there's zero mind games, zero manipulations.

The first weekend, we hadn't decided to spend the whole weekend together -- we were just going on a bookstore. We spent it all in bed, but not just fucking, we were talking. And the fucking? He couldn't cum. Even had a tough time staying hard. And for the first time in my life it was OK. Normally a guy can't, and it fucks with my insecurities so much that like no, I don't even want to be there. But instead we did everything we could and both reassured the other that it was fantastic -- bc it truly was -- and not an issue. Problem resolved but he's said like he wouldn't even think to mention orgasms if anyone asked him about that weekend that it was like 4 days of the best sex of his life, like how it can be hard to cum while rolling but the sex is amazing.

After I red'd out during the first time I was giving him head (it's a thing for him, but I'd been refusing bc he'd eaten asparagus and I warned him every such occasion would be followed by at least 5 days before his dick came in contact with my mouth again bc it makes semen taste just the worst). Going another round later in a roleplaying scene, he broke character a bit to ask about head, I said I didn't want to risk another round of sex derailed bc I got triggered since it'd just been earlier that day, he's like yeah totally get that, and both back into character and having a blast. I'm completely comfortable naked around him even if my legs have stubble, but in a sexy way, and never ever boring!

He's a musician, guitarist and bassist. He's a nerd. I recommended a book, and he immediately was going to buy a copy and I offered to loan him mine (a fave book of mine) and he has been slowly but diligently reading it and says it's better bc it's my copy and looking at it's broken to shit spine and pages that have been dog eared a million times just makes him love it more bc I love it. He wants me to come to band practice (if I can behave lol) and to join the party at dnd (if I can behave lol -- to be fair, those are my caveats, not his) but also wants to paint with me and take pottery class with me, and write a metal track that can be belly danced to (bc metal is very masculine in the tantra vibe sense, not the gender roles way, while belly dancing is pure divine feminine -- never meant to seduce, it was by women for women -- and I think that juxtaposition would be fucking amazing if we get it right) and likes hanging out with my kids (Oldest made him a dice set) and respects my relationship with B, and tells all his friends about me and wants me to meet everyone and is more worried that I like them than that they like me. He makes terrible jokes that crack me up. He sits through my storms with me. He understands that I push people away and am the poster child for trust issues and hangs through all my bullshit.

He would never want to hurt me, like truly, but also never lies to me to spare me.

We will literally spend hours past when he should be in bed for work on the phone, to the point that I, Little Miss Time is a Construct, have started watching the clock for time so he can get his sleep and I don't resent it bc he's so great about setting the boundary of he wants to stay up with me but has to sleep or will be late for work, and when we go over never blames me or resents me, but owns that he chose to do so bc he was loving it.

Yeah, I might be more than a little gone over him.

[everystephoftheway]

Hii!!!

From the Did you...? prompts, can I ask for “did you do all this?”. Anyone of your choice ^_^

“did you… ?” prompts ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍊 ꒱ thank you for sending!! and please don't be mad at me bc i did not write anything of any pop culture relevance but i did something wild and wrote about my character for our eventual campaign

It has been a long day. Well, long night. Every town guard has a turn on the night shift; they rotate every four weeks, and with the amount of guards Byroden has in its ranks everybody suffers through three times a year. It isn’t that bad, Theo tries to tell himself as the sun starts to break over the rolling hills of the horizon, but then he remembers that he can’t simply go home and go to sleep. He has a daughter to take care of, one who needs breakfast and an escort to school. His eyes are heavy, but he shakes his head to will the tiredness away like a dog shaking water off his fur. 

The sun is just barely over the hills when Theo’s day shift compatriot comes to relieve him of his post. They slap each other on the shoulder as men do, a couple mumbled niceties exchanged as Theo shuffles off towards home. A bath would be good, he thinks to himself. Just a quick dip in some cool water, rinse off the sweat of the summer night and help this staying awake thing he needs to do. In anticipation of this slowly forming plan in his head, Theo takes off his shoulder pads as he’s walking and lets them dangle from his hand up the dirt pathway to his home, the edge rustling up some dust. He doesn’t notice the gentle light that’s visible through the front window, and so when he walks in through his front door he nearly falls over when he’s met with a loud, “Surprise!” 

His shoulder pads fall onto the floor as his back hits the open edge of the door, the crown of his head bonking it with a small thud. In front of him stood his young daughter and his mother surrounded by dozens of flowers. Hung over the family portrait Theo prized so much was a large poster that read, ‘Happy Birthday!’, in the shaky handwriting of his six year old, detailed with little doodles and stick figure drawings of their family. His eyes flick between his mother and his daughter standing in front of her, his tired mind needing a couple seconds to actually process what is happening. 

“Daddy!” Eleyna doesn’t give him much time to process as she runs forward and latches herself around his waist. His hands instinctively reach around to hold her to him, and she lifts her head up so her chin is against his leg. “It’s your birthday! Happy birthday!” 

“It is?” He leans down and picks her up with a tired grunt.

“Did you forget your own birthday?” The little girl starts laughing, Theo’s heart melts, and that exhaustion is slowly fading as Dad Mode turns on. 

“I guess I did. Thank you for reminding me.” He reaches behind him to finally close the door, and he walks further into the center of the room. “Did you do all this?” 

“Grandma helped me,” she says, pointing to the distinguished looking elf in the room, who simply smiles. “I wanted to surprise you before school.” “Surprise me you did.” Theo walks over to his mother and kisses her on the cheek. “Thank you, you two. You’re too good to me.” 

“Do you wanna see your present?” 

“You got me a present too? This is a present enough.”

“No, it’s not. Let me down, please.” 

Theo puts Eleyna down and she runs up the stairs to the lofted second floor where her bedroom is. “I’m getting it!” 

Theo takes the moment to turn to his mother. “You did not have to do all this.”

“I didn’t have much of a say. She was determined.”

Theo looks over to the poster Eleyna had made where the little family of stick figures stood in the corner; there were three of them with their names labeled underneath them, Daddy, Eleyna, and Mommy. Theo subconsciously rubs at the ring on his right ring finger with his thumb.

“Yeah, well, we know where she got that from.”

[chrysanthemumpink]

I don't talk about this much either. But I didn't have a normal childhood or normal life. And I didn't truly grasp how abnormal it was till adulthood and I'm still wrestling with it.

But near my birthday, I won my first ever beauty pageant. Only one I've ever won. I was turning 13. My mom hasn't been with me through the process. She was sick. Sickee than usual. But she was at nationals with me. She was late, years later she admitted that was the probably the first time she had a heart attack.

So my aunt was there. Looking back, I remember my mom forcing my aunt to take me to nationals. It would be like a birthday present

My mom didn't call on my birthday. But during the trip, my aunt asked what it would be like living with her. I didn't like the idea. Long story short, and too much too talk about now...but my mom was gone and it'd be 3 years before she woke up again. To this day, I still don't know the exact day it happened.

Either way, my birthday is soon. But throughout my entire life, I've come on too strong. I cling too hard to people. Not because I like them. But because they are a good distraction from what I'm really thinking about.

I'm greatful that he's pretty ignorant, dismissive, and unaware. I don't want to think about how hard my birthday actually is.

The first time my mom had a heart attack was giving birth to me, the second during my 13th birthday. It's selfish but every year there's a celebration about her surviving. But I have trouble thinking about how I wasn't around during bc it was my birthday trip

Anyway, I told him I had the birthday blues and that I'd be mia for a bit. He won't ask what's wrong. He won't miss me. And that tension alone will be a good enough distraction for me. But I do fantasize about what it'd be like to not be alone this time of year

I felt so alone and lost the year I turned 13 and ever since then, I've felt the same amount of guilt and loneliness despise turning 28.

I wish he could recognize the moments in which I really need someone. But he doesn't. He doesn't even ask. But again,, maybe I'm using him as an excuse.

And to make up another excuse to leave him. He's a great guy. But maybe asking for someone to care about my birthday and the aniversary of my mom's coms isn't too much of an ask