#bc i realized i wanted to fix something
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under da sea orā¦something
friendly fire revenge for @shimmychimmy !
less water + timelapse under the cut
#gari draws#artfight#artfight 2023#artfight revenge#man i love drawing mermaids#almost as much as i loveee adding a blue textured layer on top of a mermaid for the underwater look#and staree is so pretty#this app had me fighting for my life to post the right version#bc i realized i wanted to fix something#i already submitted the attack tho oopsies
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reposting some old doodles i still enjoy a bit
#a doodley#guys im having realizations i dont really know what to do with#ive said this tons before but my main issue with art rn is like#i Know anatomy. and what it's Meant to look like. my issue is straying away from Correct and going with Good like how some of my stuff was#before i really started learning. loose and not restricted#but my obstacle is that nobody draws the way i want to draw. and im bad at coming up with my own stuff...i need to copy and osmose off#someone else. well. it turns out there is someone who draws the way i draw. and its cheye of the past.#dont get me wrong if i look thru the rest of the art in the (year) folder these came from; 80% of it sucks#i wish i cld have what past cheye had but with current cheye tweaks and refinement#but idk how to do that. something weird has happened to my mind i really cant envision and make art the same way anymore#idk how he did it back then....i wish i Knew bc current me cant make anything out of sketching or thumbnails or just going at it#arghhh#i try and force myself to draw stuff like this now (interactions) and it looks. so stiff. and bad proportion wise but idk how to fix it#which isnt to say the proportions (for example) in THESE drawings are perfect but they dont scream Wrong or Bad or Incorrect to me ykwim...#idk! idk what to do with this. ive never known how to go back and study my own stuff
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can you draw L and Light doing work together I think it'd be cute and relaxing
L says the overhead lights stay off
#ask#death note#light yagami#l lawliet#lawlight#maybe#i've been having fun w perspective lately just freehanding it seeing what happens it's nostalgic to me bc i used to draw a lot of#houses n shit bc geometric shapes and different perspectives are very relaxing to draw for me#did a very dark color palette bc i have been going crazy wild with color palettes lately (they are coming soon) idk something in my#head clicked and i have just been a color understander i've pulled color palettes out of thin air and they work it's wild and very fun but#wanted to do smth more low-key bc i drew this in the middle of the night for one and also blue greys are some of my fav colors#for sketching and i didn't feel like lining and finishing this for realsies#ah just realized i forgor their handcuffs oops i am not going back to fix that
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juvie buddies
#alek art#td duncan#td mal#total drama#total drama all stars#(if i want to get technical)#2024#duncan is around 15 here... mal is around 16#ive thought really hard about them these past few days . in my brain they actually knew each other and canon is different#duncan and mike got along really well. in juvie mal refused to speak to anyone about anything and would fight as many people as he could .#he wanted to stay in there and far away from home . they get roomed together and duncan is the first person who mal can talk to . he isnt#scared of him . he relates to him a lot . like -> wow we both act out for attention and people think we are terrible because of it#duncan being a mentally ill teenager seeing mal an also very mentally ill teenager thought 'i can fix him' . mike and duncan speak too here#i cant really see anyone else fronting besides those two . their brain was on lockdown and mike wanted out so bad . i see manitoba as a#gatekeeper so hed handle some sessions with their psych. i want to say they (duncan and mike) get moved to a psyche ward just because#i have more knowledge on being in one and how it goes ... but yeah i like duncan mal a lot . this art isnt ship whatsoever though š i dont#see them as a couple their dynamic is just better as friends imo#but anyways in all stars they obviously recognize each other but have an unspoken agreement not to say anything abt it#duncan is a known criminal but mike isnt like that . mike hadnt even told zoey about that part of his life . so duncan wanted to respect his#privacy -> then mal starts hurting people and he has to step in . mal isnt a good person by any means but i dont think he was that bad in#juvie . so duncan had to come to terms that his friend wasnt the same person he was years ago (in all stars duncan is ~18 and i think mike#is almost 20... so it had been a while since they last talked)#them getting each other like no other and being in pain because they couldnt really speak . i see them having a conversation still in moon#madness abt their past and history . god i just think abt them and their wasted potential wdym mike and duncan were in juvie together#duncan was in for trespassing or destruction of private property or something really dumb . mal fought his parent(s) and got in for assault#mal was already in when duncan was placed . and duncan was let out early on good behavior + his parents (dad) mostly did it to teach him a#lesson . wrong of them or otherwise . so mal was just kinda stuck there until they realized he was actually not right in the head . think he#knew abt their DID but was only diagnosed in juvie and had to go from there . tbh he shouldve been tried as an adult but td logic . doesnt#matter dw guys . mike gets the 'was put on random meds that made him go braindead' treatment bc that was me . post mental hospital abilify#had me messed up
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I am actually. I am so emotional over the Salazar parents and I need to share this to tumblr too.
A lot of stories where the MC is adopted I feel. Either dismiss the biological parents and the impact they have on the kid's life, or makes them evil and abusive, framing the loss of the bio parents as a good thing, or at least something we shouldn't think about just look at this new family.
But Genrex doesn't do that. From the start, Rex wanted to find out more about his parents - it's one of his primary character motivations, next to helping people. He loves them, even though he doesn't know them.
And the more he finds out about them, the more he realizes they loved him. Rylander is consumed by guilt but as Rex's first connection to his pre-Event life, the first thing he does is hug him. And when he tells Rex about his parents, the two things Rex knows is that 1) they were scientists, and 2) that when he was in danger, they were desperate enough to use their secret, experimental technology to save him. Technology built from their desire to help the world, to save countless lives and end countless suffering.
And then. When he finds out that they were dead, he doesn't stop caring. It'd be so easy, too, to tie it up there - his parents were good people, he got his answer about them, the end. But they don't. He doesn't. Because the show is saying once again that they are his parents. He still calls them mom and dad, even as the show makes it clear Holiday and Six adopted Rex as their son. Even as the show even parallels Six and One with Rex and Six (and I will talk about that more later if I don't forget, trust me), to really drive home how much they're family. Rex even says he considers the two of them family, and later that he considers Noah, Claire and Annie family.
He has new family, the show tells us, but his old family still matters to him. He's upset that he never has the chance to meet his parents, that everything he hears about them, about his time with them, is secondhand knowledge. It tells us clearly that not only does Rex still love them, but that he still wants to know them. And everything we find out about them reinforces the love that they had for each other.
We see Abuela and the family in Mexico, who connect him to his birth family and tell him that he was so loved back then, and still is now. We see their office in Abysus through Rex's eyes. The picture of him and his dad on his desk. The drawing Rex drew, proudly pinned to the wall.
We see it in the familiarity of the drawing. That that robot, that build, was what Rex created when he was lost and scared and alone - that it was made to keep him safe. That it first appeared in his mind in a place he felt safe.
The show says, tenderly and softly, that the love is still there. That the fact these people died was nothing but a tragedy, that their love is a big part of what made Rex who he is today - that every molecule in his body is filled with their final gift to him. That every time he cures someone, every time he uses a build, every time he makes a machine - we see the love that they had for him.
And the way he quietly absorbs his father's face. The way he freezes and whispers "MamĆ”?" when he finds out Zag-Rs has their mother's voice. The fact that she even has her voice as a testament to Caesar's love, too - that it was meant to bring comfort and safety. The way Rex yells at Caesar when he finds out they have a family property, a connection to their past, the way he fights to protect it.
And, none of this takes away still from Six and Holiday being Rex's family too. None of this removes the work either set of parents did for him, the love either set has - the show says that it was unfair that the Salazar parents were lost. That Six and Holiday are not replacements, that they still love him as parents but play different roles in his life. They can not, and have no desire to, replace the Salazars. But Rex needs parents, he needs protectors, and so they will do what they can for him - at first out of necessity, to keep this kid they barely know safe, but then out of love. They aren't replacing what was lost, but are doing their best to do what Rex's bio parents would do. And they do mess up in it - they mess up in ways Rex's bio parents might not have. Six is clearly bad with showing affection, affection we saw the Salazars give Rex so easily, and Holiday is overworked and stressed constantly, sometimes breaking under the pressure and snapping at Rex and Six, things we never saw the Salazars do.
It's just. It's about how sometimes things will not be the same. They will be different. That doesn't mean the people you lost aren't still with you.
#This is also. Why I dislike the 'Rex was secretly made for the nanite experiments the accident was a lie' theory so much#Bc it assigns malice where the show says over and over again there was only love.#That this was only ever a tragedy of good people whose good intentions were manipulated and twisted.#And I think giving them something shitty to have done in the past especially goes against the message of the show's perspective on adoption#The family we choose is not always stronger than the family we are born to. Sometimes they are equal in different ways.#Rex's bio parents are gone but not replaced. They have also shaped who he is#Six and Holiday are just picking up where they left off. Because they have to.#Also I don't like the theory that Rex's parents are EVOs somewhere bc I think it diminishes the impact of the tragedy too.#I get. Wanting them to have a happy ending. But I think it's important to realize that this is the closest they can have to a happy ending.#Some things cannot be replaced. Or fixed. Sometimes life takes what we love and what loves us. And that is okay.#It is okay to be upset at that and it is okay to never fully move on.#'What about Caesar?' I have. Another post's worth of thoughts about him.#But I think he's also a character who is defined more by Rex by their relation and defined by the story by his guilt#I think he is the closest thing Rex has to a shitty bio family member and he is shitty in plenty of ways#But he's also a parallel to Rex in a lot of ways. He fails where Rex succeeds bc of it.#generator rex#genrex#Anyways. Sorry for the big post.
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topology on this thing if anyone's curious. frankly they could stand to be a lot higher definition but i have disease of 'if i model something with more than 10k polygons i get scared' (joke)
#covers my face don't look at the legs and shoulders. legs were bc i had to fix something i didnt realize i messed up#and shoulders are uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh like that. smiles. i do not do a lot of retopo and edge flow still evades me but were getting there#3d#not tagging as chars or anything bc this isnt really Art its more technical. i just figure maybe someone here might have wanted to see#text#also i feel obligated to disclaim. i can retopo high poly but i didnt want to spend four weeks on this so. side eyes my last zbrush project
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do love how this is an asoiaf blog but i did not put either show in my top 10 this is the world we live in
#the only season that really compares to the book is season 1.#the rest even when theyāre engaging have changed something that feels so central to the hook that iām mad aksjd.#getting on my soap box#if iwtv s3 is good it may knock someone out. probably qaf.#bsg is p high up there i just think season 4 really suffered on pacing & the suspicious nature of who dies annoyed me.#veep is also very high up there tbh i need to rewatch it. the thing is. as we know. i am a romantic at heart and amy & jonah have my favorit#sitcom relationship. veep has genuinely one of the best finales to ever exist but iām a sap.#and amy coming back to tell jonah that he made her realize she doesnāt actually have to expect the worst from life. oh my god.#also superstore >>> parks & rec >>> the office bc superstore never romanticized the hell of their job#amy quitting her corporate job when she realized she would never be able to make the changes she wanted within the system she was always#going to compromise too much and wind up like jeff. glenn reopening his dadās hardware shop & specifically who goes w him & who stays w gina#at the store? it has what the other two lack which is characters that feel like they keep existing after you stop watching#BECAUSE the way they interacted with the world was so real and so much more realistic. amy canāt fix the system but she can find a job that#she doesnāt feel is so soul sucking. glenn may be choosing a harder path by reopening the hardware store but itās the one that makes him#most fulfilled. gina just gets to make money and be bossy w people who do what theyāre told. that rings so true to me.#i almost out bojack horseman in here too actually but once again i think the last season just needed to be a tad longer just like bsg.#also same issue w pitch as w bly manor - itās an amazingly written season of tv but itās ONE season of tv#big brother as always outsells yes i am hoping to tempt some of u into watching by posting dan & ian in the dog costume#i have that gif and the āsitā scene saved on my phone always
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#lmao i keep catching myself feeling stressed from work and i have to remind myself i do not get paid enough to get this worked up over it#i realized that i am getting paid pretty much the same as my old retail job bc of all the deductions/taxes and it makes me feral with rage#my coworker once said off hand that they probably don't mind me doing ot bc i get paid so much less than everyone else#and she said it like it was a ha ha moment when it actually made me want to set everything on fire#personal#okay i am for real going to fix my resume and look for something else!!! change is scary!! but staying still is scarier
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i was gonna make a post abt how i dont rly like like. Genre changing covers of songs and then realized upon introspection is that i sort of just dont like rock covers of songs generally
#there are exceptions probably. And i do like rock music im not like deep into it or anything but my dad likes rock music soni grew up#listening to it And enjoy it#maybe im just projecting my prejudices against rock fans into the covers. or something . but itll be like. a disco song and its a rock cover#and im sort of just like. IDK. im probably being silly abt it and it isnt avtually anything just From my interactions with rock fans a lot#of the ones ive spoken to NOT ALL r like..sooo goddamn pretentious and rly put down like Any other genre of music esp like. pop and also#like literally any genre with black roots For some reason . Who knows why that is ... so tomme when they do like a rock cover of a song it#feels more like a Lol fixed your song now Cool ppl can listen to it rather than like a. ooh i enjoyed your song and i wanted to try and do#it but in my style of music. If that makes sense. which is literally just me making up an issue and im Literally putting words in their#mouth I am realizing . IDKK just rambling i suppose. Apologies#like idk i think the novelty of like um. Ooh heres this super cutesy song in a more 'aggressive' sounding form is like. cool but it just umm#idk. ik everyone and their mother says this but i rly do like a wide variety of genres and i go to different genres for different things you#know. and i feel like . IDK i rly am just saying anything. is this an evil thing to say#okay sorry. do not take any of this seriously i am going to bed idt im 1. wording snything write 2#idk if i have a salient (is that the word?) thought to express anyways . another miss for connor in the thinking department he has gotttt#to stop trying! gn everyone love you#also this was a thought that came to my mind bc of a podt i saw but its not like me being mad abt seeing that post or eing mad at the#person who put it on my dash LOL it was a fine video i loooove mirrors like that real ones remember#Just made me think abt it. and i think also i still have some lingering rage from that stupid fucking lay all your love on me cover ider if#that was a genre change or not i get so mad abt it that its fully blacked out of my head#but i think its influencing me in dark ways. and also im just imagining someone doing like an all i need is your sweet loving rock cover and#its making me so.mad#and please listen to All i need is your sweet loving off of gloria gaynors 1975 album '#'never can say goodbye' do this for me i love youuu :] its a rly good album
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maybe some 10hour minecraft solo would fix me
#i dunno#im not sure why ive been all Eughh abt the server bf likes#part of it might be the New aspect of it and another part might be just how active it is and how many ppl are there#even tho im not like. ever direct or one on one with them its like#im at a party sort of#the chat is active too much and That. drains me a lot faster than i realize#so either a smaller server a Much smaller server or a solo world for a minute#would fix me#because i do want to minecraft#i miss it its good its nice it gives me something to do that i likely wouldn't ever get shamed for#(in this day and age... back in my day id get bullied in school about it)#(not usually by students but some did Judge me Heavily but mostly it was teachers who were like. 'video games are violenntt!!') but anyways#i wanna like the server bf likes so badly#but every single time i log on im like i cant find a good spot ever theres too many people and hhhh#so i log off of it pretty quickly even tho i Want. to like it#i jus dont think i caaann#and hi leo if ur reading this which i Hope you are <3#i would've told you this earlier. If i found out and unpacked this earlier but I'm only unpacking it now and at the time of#typing this i am so so so so SO sleepy and you are possibly just waking up or about to in an hour or so#so mwah mwah ily and such and gmmm#and im sorry if the short minecraft sessions felt Bad but it 10000% wasnt you#the uniqueness of that server js fun dont get me wrong but i dont think it can be like an All Time server for me#so make your own lil space there and ill pop in from time to time#if u want to at least#nya.txt#ow why cramps..#im nit bleeding or anything jus empty cramps bc i missed some shots oops#but its tolerable i just wnana sleeeeeepp
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i try so hard not to be That Artistā¢ but. to this day ive never understood how that one rose drawing of mine has never gotten much attention. every time i see it im like. goddamn youre telling me /i/ made this??? well dang if no one else wants to eat it im happy to do it myself
#this is also a foray into attemtping the opposite of delf deprecation which is hard considering every other#drawing ive felt this way about in the past ive later been like. ok yeah that sucked actually#but this one idk i still have yet to find anything that im like this is bad#beyond that i guess it kind of looks like lizzie mcguire if you squint? so maybe ppl didnt realize it was rose too JENFKSHJIJIWJKAK#anything else i could point to as technically bad is something i know i did deliberately bc i was aiming for smth#way more stylized than i normally do#so like her eyebrows and eyes cover her hair but the outlines still overlap which in any other drawing of mine would be something id fix#and reupload but this one i was going for that more cartoony vibe where theyre like. no i dont want to pick between the hair#and the eyes/eyebrows fuck you#thats also why the cheek shadows are the way that they are altho i can see how they can read as just like. weird face paint or smth
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it is unfortunate when i go to prayer and cry my eyes out and the only response i really hear is that i simply have to bear it. like usually i can get my emotions out and once theyāre settled i hear a rational solution but it sucks when i donāt get the answer i want. i just have to keep waiting. like normally i hear something that gives me strength but wow apparently iāve hit a new low
#literally all my problems would be so much easier to deal with if i had friends#and normally iād be told ādo this and youāll probably find friendsā#my plan has always been just to wait for someone to find me bc iām horribly shy and antisocial#even though logically i know thatās a bad way of going about it#my logical rational analytical brain has always been obsessed with finding concrete answers. itās always been āwhat can *I* doā#so even when i suffer thereās a part of me that says āitās ok once iām done crying i can work this out and go right back to tryingā#iāve been emotionally dead for years but iāve always held onto faith like that#tonight i feel like iāve been brought low. i feel like iāve finally been told that i might just have to wait after all#which i might think would be comforting bc it absolves me of responsibility#but itās actually crushing bc it absolves me of power#i feel like iām finally facing the realization that iām powerless and pathetic and iām never going to be able to fix myself#that i can try as hard as i want but i canāt shake off this cross#but i donāt know how long i have to wait for someone to find me#and even if they find me how do i not fumble it#my first instinct is to push people away bc i assume theyāre not really interested theyāre just trying to be nice#which is usually true#i donāt even know how to sustain casual friendships and im so desperately in need of deep ones#i canāt open up to someone without just breaking apart and making it clear how pathetic i am#one would think i ought to find someone better than myself who can fix me#but on the other hand i think the only time that the good parts of me come out is when im facing someone even worse than me#like i have a tendency to morph into the opposite of the other person in any given situation to maintain healthy balance#so like when surrounded by extroverts which is almost always i become an introvert#itās rare to meet an introvert but then i become stronger and more extroverted around them. like something in me just loves helping others#even though i canāt help myself#what do i pray for? a fellow pathetic person? or someone with the patience and kindness and life knowledge of a saint?#will either of them really be found just by chance in my life?#and even if i do meet someone. truly i wish theyād also be lonely. i want them to need me#i donāt want to be a pity charity case. like a side project for someone with real friends already
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iām literally going to **** ******
#iāve been without T for a month or so because my doctor forgot to prescribe it again when my last prescription period was over bc she could#only prescribe it a year at a time. so i went in to do bloodwork because ive been having health problems like getting a light period and#PMDD a year and a half into being on T and it happened to be when she was supposed to represcribe which iwas like ok nice!#but she forgot to represcribe it so I was 2 weeks without it before I realized that hmm something probably happened#so I called her and she fixed it. then the pharmacy told me that they're out of stock. so I called them to find out when it'd be in stock.#then they said it's in stock but she prescribed me the 10mL bottle when my insurance doesn't cover that. so I called her again to fix that.#and she said that she didn't prescribe me that because why would she when my shots aren't even close to 1 mL? so I called the pharmacy#and they said yeah idk who said that it's wrong. your T will be ready later today. I go to pick it up and quite literally the moment I pull#up to the window the pharmacists pull down the shade that says they're closed on lunch. so ive had horrible mental health and physical symp#oms for the past month because I've been without t right? so I thought okay when I come back home from moving out of my apt#because my pharmacy is in my hometown; then ill get my T. and then once I get my T I can start my new medication because I want my levels t#stabilize before we introduce something new into the ecosystem. and im cleaning my apartment today and going through bags and shit and lo a#behold? there are four fucking boxes of T sitting in a bag in my closet JUST LIKE I THOUGHT! I JUST COULD NOT FIND THEM so ive been going#through hell for fucking nothing. for literally nothing. and I was like oh my god okay I have my T I should go and pick up my new medicatio#and I go to get my shoes on and look at the clock and it's 5:01. they close at 5.#and I have my appointment with my psychiatrist on Wednesday where shes going to ask me how it's been starting my medication and im going to#have to tell her I havent started and im not better at all and im so new to her im nervous what she will say. sorry for being crazy. im not#good at this or medication. sorry. do you want me to kill myself ill do it in front of you if that would help. AUGHHHHGHHGHGHHHHHHHHHHGGHGH#NONE OF THIS HAD TO HAPPEN. I JUST HAVE SO MUCH SHIT IN MY APARTMENT BECAUSE ITS SO SMALL THAT I COULD NOT FIND PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION#I HATE IT HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME OUTTTTTT (in my brain)
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||. thor misunderstanding earthen housing norms in the modern day is SO funny to me to think about. He's doing his best, but between being from another planet with far more advanced technology (and much more "archaic" culture customs) on top of also being a PRINCE, I would imagine some normal practices and understandings of things simply don't click with him more than others.... Not because he's not smart. Thor is incredibly intelligent. ONLY because of the huge culture divide. But... that said: the concept of having neighbors who own their own land right next to yours, but the plots of land are TINY ??? absolutely crazy to him. Why aren't the plots of land BIGGER? why don't more people utilize it to farm crops???
Also don't get him STARTED on the idea - or nature of - apartments.
#(it's justā i'm realizing that living with jan.e fo//st.e.r would have taught him SO much??)#(i can imagine him questioning everything about /everything/ on occasion...)#(just... ja/.ne and th.o/r chilling around breakfast and he decides he's got a severe case of the toddler why's)#(he's curious about a common practice and wants to understand the logic of itā who better to make it make sense than his beloved)#(even something as basic as a house key. why does he NEED that? he's never needed a āhouse keyā for his palace)#(he can just /walk in/??? ask the guards to open the doors??? use a biometric lock??? )#(ā ah but is the āhouse keyā for a secret compartment perhaps? a hidden passage? a secret chest???)#(what's the house key for if not for something particularly worthwhile??? it's so archaic ?? it must be very old.)#(what??? it was made yesterday??? It actually /IS/ for the front door????)#(what do you /mean/ you haven't got guards or sentries and the po-lice can't offer THEIR services with compensation)#(the avenger's tower does it??? shield does it???? he thought that would be normal for earth houses???)#(he doesn't see how that's supposed to keep j.a//ne safe all that well >> he's decided he's going to fix /that/ first thing.)#(granted: i doubt he'd actually ask or comment most of this out loud but it'd likely be what he's thinking)#(anyways he wouldn't /use/ the key when he has a balcony they can just keep unlocked so he can get in from there)#(and he'd probably have a similar setup on the avengers tower)#(it isn't as though anyone will reach it from up so high. he can fly. it'll be fine.)#(furthermore ...... he'd probably break his house keys....)#(...always on accident tho.... he'd want to keep his house key from ja.n//e safe bc it's from her)#( ooc . ) ā stories that leap from the page .#(i'm mostly rambling my thoughts out loud - this would make a really cute domestic fos.ter/s//on fic)#(someone write this and then show me)#(or maybe i'll do it idk)
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got my schedule!!!!!
IT IS INCOMPLETE !!!!!!!
#work logs#snow speaks#your boy is going through it rn lmaooooo#but it was a good morning tho thank goodness i decided to ask a mentor if i could tag along this morning#i wouldve had the rest of the day off to study bc of a class i have to take but#i have to go meet w the director to figure out whats going on w it ššš#at least if i start w this schedule ill be w the director to figure stuff out šš#i just feel bad bc i do like the other department i was working w so i have to go tell them i moved for now#will be back tho!!!!#oh wait a sec i just realized ill be back in ( )#jdjdjfjdjjdjdjdjd u fr.............#im gonna start gnawing on something hold on lmao#anyways its ok its out of my control (but also i want to Fix Things So I Can Do Stuff)#PLEASE IM.SO BORED AND IDK WHAT TO DO ASIDE STUDY...
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every time someone tells me "holy shit your life is really hard and you're managing incredibly well" it heals me a little bit. need that verbal reminder from others bcs it rlly doesn't mean as much when I say it to myself.
#personal#not that i rely entirely on external validation but like. it really does help me.#like i can talk about my life shit a bunch but never actually realize that it IS really hard and im managing INCREDIBLY#i need that as a preface before anyone suggests that i need to do another thing to fix a certain problem#like i have a miles long to-do list that im chipping away at#but even for someone not disabled. those are still extremely hard tasks.#especially to suggest them non-chalantly. like i feel like they all need a disclaimer that says#this will take time. this is not something im expecting/recommending you do IMMEDIATELY#bcs of course i want to fix as much as i can IMMEDIATELY. plus I have a warped sense of urgency that does not help.
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