#bc i just know ill be a bitch in the morning if i dont get anymore sleep. please i just wanna SLEEP!

[kaiserkisser]

can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )

[possum-tooth]

up at fucking 4a worrying ab shit i CANT CONTROL RN

[lovelyghostz]

Hear me out: an au where Narinder is recruited as a follow and becomes a mortal, but falls ill because of said turning mortal.

I mean, it would probably take a lot out of him, right? So what if it acted as a mortal illness? He gets recruited and just collapses on the stone thingy immediately with a burning fever. Lamb wants to take special care of him bc 1) they dont know if mortal medicines would even work on him and 2) they’re worried despite the fact they just usurped him

Narinder wakes up delirious as all hell and pissed off at Lambert because obviously, and tries being intimidating to them but his arms are weak when he goes to swat so his wrists are limp and flailing, and his eyes cant seem to stay open for long enough to glare at them, and on top of that he feels like he’s gonna vomit. So Lambert takes care of a begrudging narinder.

But the sickness is persisting.

And persisting.

And persisting some more.

It gets better ofc, if it hadn’t Narinder probably would’ve died by now, but it’s misery for a man who hasn’t actually had to feel mortal sicknesses literally ever. So the Lamb continues to take care of him, and despite himself he softens. He doesn’t smile when they enter the room, not yet, but he doesn’t hiss (or try to at least) when they enter, either. He’s simply indifferent. Until he’s not.

One night is particularly rough. It’s a few months in and Narinder is still ill. He’s waking up to vomit every half an hour or so and the Lamb hasn’t slept at all, simply watching with worry and honestly a bit of fear. The cat who had been their god for so long now lay in bed with a brow furrowed in discomfort and fur damp from sweat.

He wakes up once more, but not for throwing up this time. This time, he’s delirious, and it’s bad. He’s babbling with unfocused eyes, his body swaying with the struggle of sitting up. Suddenly, though, he makes eye contact with the lamb through three glassy eyes, and his pupils dilate. He murmurs what must have been sleep-deprived, sickly words, because he says that he thinks the lamb is “pretty in the moonlight.” They freeze obviously because WOAH what the FUCK??? And Narinder just slumps back over and falls back asleep, this time with a more pleased expression.

They don’t say anything that night, and neither of them say anything in the morning, either. But Narinder knows, and he knows Lambert knows.

Slowly, very slowly, Narinder improves.

He gains strength and his symptoms improve until finally, after literal months, he’s back to normal. Then and only then, he tells Lambert that they really are so pretty in the moonlight.

He tells them that he likes the way their wool catches the moon’s glow. He says he’d like to trace their jawline as the light does, with such a gentle touch. He says that he’d like to kiss them as the moonlight does, making them look as though they’re glowing.

Lambert is a gay ass bitch and they kiss ok the end ty

[thedeathwitchescats]

My collection of tips for people who are just now developing a chronic illness or just now realizing they have one. ((As someone who has only been struggling with mine for a little over a year))

-dont blame yourself for not being able to do what you used to. Your body used to do its job to a better degree than it does now. You are not lazy bc your taking more breaks or bc you cant get out of bed. Your taking care of yourself. I struggle with this all the time. Especially considering my living situation. Shit doesnt get done when I dont do it but I simply cant sometimes.

-that leads me into my next point. Take advantage of your good days, but dont overwork yourself just bc your "not feeling chronically ill." When you have the energy, start the laundry, do the dishes, take out the trash, but still take breaks as needed

-keep a set of your meds literally everywhere. I have a pill box I specifically keep in my car with a weeks worth of my morning meds. I have a three sets of my most important meds in my bag at all times. I have pain meds stashed in every crevasse they could be stashed. Trust me, when your running late and you get half way to work before you realize you havent taken your meds your gonna want to be able to reach into your glove box and take them rq

-buy the mobility aid. You think you need a brace bc a specific joint hurts like hell and wont stay in place?? Get it. You cant walk for long periods of time and think a cane would help?? Get it. You think a shower chair would do you good so you dont pass out with shampoo in your eyes and naked?? Get it. Just get it. Walmart sells canes for under ten bucks and they work really well. They also have extra tips in a two back for 2.50. Dollar tree has braces and like 12 different pain creams. Five below also has some braces and quite a few pain relief options. You can also get them cheap on sites like shein or Amazon and sometimes depop. ((I know I know, dont support those sites but a bitch is broke and two bucks for compression socks is a fucking steal)) You can also sometimes find wheelchairs and canes and crutches at goodwill. It isnt a guarantee but its a good option if you need smt cheap. ((Be careful and check that their not broken before you buy))

-take the pain meds. Put on the pain cream. Ice that joint. You dont get brownie points for toughing it out and it will help your health in the long run. If someone looks at you like your weak for taking smt to help with your pain, their the problem, not you.

-create a good support system. Find the people who will drop their brand new iced coffee to stop you from slamming your head into the ground during a fainting spell. They are out there. Find them and hold onto them for dear fucking life

-try to make the best of what you can do every day. Put on cute earrings. Buy cute compression socks. Get braces that fit your vibe. Put stickers on your mobility aids. Put pins on your bag. Carry a cute weighted stuffie for when you need some extra comfort. Make the most of what you are capable of doing.

[wish-i-were-heather]

i just need to vent ignore this pls

oh my GOODNESSCAN YOU JUST ADMIT YOURE WRONG AUGH HOW HARD IS IT??? I DIDNT FUCKING DO ANYTHING!!! im sorry i fucking misunderstood you, its not worth any argument. its the STUPIDEST ARGUMENT LITERALLY WHY ARE YOU MAD??? she said to try on the dress, so i tried on the dress. then she says its the wrong one. okay, fine, my mistake. no problem. apparently there is a problem because "didnt you hear me tell you the other one we ordered arrived?" NO I CLEARLY DIDNT OTHERWISE I WOULDVE PUT THAT ONE ON? so its like ok fine ill put on the other its no big deal. but apparently i used the wrong fucking tone? what tone am i supposed to use i just talked normally. and i do like the dress i fucking do i like the dress damn why are you so pressed about it. "if you dont like it why did you buy it then its a waste" I LIKE THE FUCKING DRESS SHUT TF UP. and then apparently when he agrees that i didnt use a tone, "doesnt the tone she's using sound just like a meltdown? do you not hear it? NO HE DOESNT HEAR IT OBVIOUSLY THERES NO FUCKING TONE TO HEAR OMG ITS LITERALLY NOT A PROBLEM THERES NO NEED TO ARGUE I TRIED ON THE WRONG FUCKING DRESS LET IT GO. but apparently fucking not so im like oh sorry i didnt know wheres the dress im supposed to wear and she fucking goes "ill show you" in the most demeaning, slow, talking to someone whos overracting type of tone. like excuse me? all i did was ask a question? im not doing anything? so then i just respond "okay" in the same fucking tone. and when she hears that tone now she gets mad? yeah its not very fun to hear is it huh. and then shes like "oh nevermind we dont have to try it on well do it later" AND WALKS AWAY LIKE BITCH THIS WAS YOUR IDEA DO YOU WANT ME TO WEAR IT OR NOT? how can you give me this stupid ass attitude, say i have attitude, then walk away like im the dramatic overreacter here?

then she decides to just leave. fully leave. like i go into my room thinking we're done because i wasnt even that mad she was the one who was pissed. and then she knocks on the door (wow i didnt know she could do that she always just opens it) and is like uh where r u? and im like im in here and apparently that upsets her that im not trying on the dress that i didnt fucking know existed until five minutes ago and she just WALKS AWAY?? JUST SAYS WHATEVER AND FULLLY LEAVES. GOES OUTSIDE TO TAKE A WALK? HELLO? YOU CANT JUST LEAVE AN ARGUMENT WHEN YOURE LOOSING??? YOU CANT JUST WALK THE FUCK AWAY??

so then later i feel fine im not mad anymore i left that post with a bunch of tags complaining. and then i go to say goodnight and shes all stiff and he tells me shes still mad. and then she decides to talk about how shes "invisible and it feels like everyone is ignoring her and invalidating her emotions and stuff" LIKE LITERALLY WHO DID THAT? WHERE- WHAT? WHO??? like she doesnt know how to admit shes wrong its actually a problem. sometimes youre wrong and sometimes you have to be the bigger person. but no she has the emotional maturity of a five year old and decides to just sit there and cross her arms and not fucking talk as we both try to apologize??? and neither of us even know what we did wrong. and then SHE TRIES TO TURN IT AROUND AND "APOLOGIZES" AND IS LIKE OH IM WRONG ITS FINE WHATEVER. LIKE NO LETS TALK ABOUT THIS BUT SHE DOESNT WANT TO?? HELLO? normally the morning after an argument ill go and apologize because ill be wrong but this time i dont even know what to say because im not even doing anything wrong. shes the one who got mad at me for a simple fucking misunderstanding. all because i put on the wrong dress?? oh my goodness its not that deep at all just apologize and move on.

and the worst part is i was crying. i started crying. i was crying. during this whole damn argument. and i couldnt get words out bc my fucking throat was all weird. and i sounded rediculous. its fucking humiliating. i was trying to tell her like im not sad im not upset but she just gave me this nasty ass glare so i guess im the problem and im still overreacting.

THIS IS THE STUPIDEST ARGUMENT ANYONES EVER HAD OH MY GOODNESS LITERALLY JUST BECAUSE I MISUNDERSTOOD WHEN YOU SAID "THE DRESS ARRIVED AND I WANT YOU TO TRY IT ON." like im not even that important at all its not worth it. like oh my goodness just say youre wrong and move on. but the problem is she cant apologize and say shes wrong without playing the victim and "omg you guys dont even care im just invisible im being ignored your invalidating me" NO WERE NOT STOP TALKING

whatever its fine i guess. shes still important to me. i love her. shes just an only child and i really think it shows in the way she argues.

this is stupid. what a way to end the night with me crying because i accidentally used the wrong tone apparently and "had a meltdown" by litreally just explaining a simple misunderstanding.

but i can listen to short and sweet tomorrow!! i was gonna tonight but my nights fucking ruined :)

if you for some reason decided to read this, no you didnt

[shwarmii]

how can you like drunk angst over first kiss?? 🥺

anon is regarding this post here, specifically my tags

characters discussed belong to @dakotawritesif / @disenchantedif

omg, so easily lol

bc its not just drunk angst, it is drunk angst about knowing their ex is gonna DIE, UNNATURALLY, AND SOON and pining/having never made up with them

but also im an asmr/audio-roleplay connoisseur*, so like, uh, also the following here. yeah. this primes me up to LOVE drunk ex scenario regret/pining shit lol (you'll have to excuse all these audios being men btw, i have a soft spot for deep voices and there isnt many deep-voiced women VAs in the audio-roleplay community (unfortunately foR MEEEE UGHH), much less many that have a video involving this niche Drunk Ex trope anyway lmao rip (same with the audios all being either "for Anybody" or "for Females". i don't currently have any "for Males" in this niche, even tho im the type of enby that listens to all three types of "for [you]" audios. alas. boo hiss))

none of these are "Luci-Inserts" btw, moreso "Evidence of why OF COURSE I AM MORE HYPED FOR DRUNK HALLWAY OVER FIRST KISS", like a vision board kinda sorta lmao

When Your Ex Drunk Calls You (I Miss You) (Slurred Speech) (Funny) (ASMR) (M4A).. (Fun fact: this VA is Scottish. also M4A = Male For Anyone, not just M4M (male for male) or M4F (male for female))

(this one is by the same Scottish VA) When You Drink With Your Ex (Kissing) (Exes to Lovers) (Drunk) (Regret) (Wholesome) (M4A) (ASMR)

(more of this Scottish VA bc he makes me laugh) When Your Crush Drunkenly Confesses To You (Singing Idiot) (Taking Care Of Him) (Silly) (ASMR) (M4A) (bonus there is a morning-after part two to this one yay)

Your Drunk Best Friend Wants You Gor Valentines [M4A] [Tsundere] [Confession] [Sober Listener] (and this one has a part two about the morning-after too)

ASMR Voice: I Should Have Told You [M4A] [Drunk Voicemail] [Ex-boyfriend] [Missing you] [Regret]

Audio Roleplay for Women | "Orbit" | Drunken Confession

Audio RP: Your Ex-boyfriend Asks For Another Chance [M4A] (not drunk but i love this one) (also it has a part two as well yayyy)

this one ((M4A but he does say you have a "pretty face") bc i do like Luci being upset someone is going to hurt the MC) and this one ((M4F) because i like the frustration lmao rip) also fit the vibe but neither are drunk or exes lmao rip

like, you would think as someone who is chronically ill to the point that my meds say "absolutely no alcohol (and one used to say no weed, idk if im still on that one, id have to go check)" that i would not give a shit about drunk scenarios buT I DO LOVE IT IN FICTION SO MUCH. my irl friends also like getting drunk on/off, or high, and my forced sobriety due to meds (and also family history, let's be honest. i do come from a long line of addicts, apparently, best i dont get involved, and i never have been) means i get to play Designated Driver pretty often. so i do recognize some realities/fantasties in the scenario. but also, god, i love the trope because it allows for such forced vulnerabilities, i fucking love whump fics, and a drunk ex fic is really just a whump fic with no bruises

and, ngl, i do think it is more likely we will get a First Kiss pov somewhere down the line if it loses than i think we will get a Hallway pov if it loses

plus, they were like what, 10?? 11??? idk how old they were when Luci/MC got together. but i know these fuckers are fresh out of high school and Luci is getting drunk, which means biTCHES ARE UNDERAGE DRINKING (which is an interesting characterization for Luci that i think reveals a lot about the Rivera parents as well as Luci's connections to wealth/alcohol), so there is that drama of "hide, hide, hide!!" if nothing else

and, again, then there's not only the angst of "ah, my ex-partner and/or -best friend" and the wanting to make up platonically/romantically but there is also the angst of "i knOW YOU'RE GOING TO GET MURDERED SOON AND IM NOT READY TO GO TO YOUR FUNERAL BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO STOP THIS" kind of "lost time", "call for rain-check until you can't" angle too. plus, i could see Luci being protective or frustrated or terrified, there are so many fun angles no matter the platonic/romantic additional feelings involved. and, because of how this pov works, there isnt going to be a kiss or anything happening. so it's just going to be slow-burn (to friends or lovers, idk your mc) and pining (platonic pining is a thing), i love that for me specifically lmao

but i do, like, get it. i get what you mean. if i thought this ask was mean-spirited, i wouldve deleted it and not answered; but i read this as "lol yeah that is fucked of me huh lmao you right". bc, YEAH, first kiss is romantic, drunk in your shared hallways is NOT lmao rip but i dont care if its romantic or not, i care that its making my guts get all twisted up. and the angst of (1) drunk ex that needs to taken care of (or needs to run away from you, either or) (2) thinks youre going to be murdered/in an accident and die soon and (3) may/may not still be in love with you and (4) knows they dont have enough time to reconcile with you and make-up for lost time... ngl, that is going to impact me more than a first kiss. im ready for the tragedy. fucking love this kinda shit

also i have my own hcs about my mc, Giselle "Gigi" Kraven, and Luci Rivera's first kiss. so. that probably also plays a role in all this bUT HEY!! IM STILL TRYING FOR THE 50/50 LMAO RIP WE ARE HELPING EACH OTHER, MY COMRADE 🤝 YOU GET (DOOMED) FLUFF AND I GET (ALSO DOOMED) DRUNK ANGST, THAT'S A WIN-WIN LOL

*i would like to add: i have no idea if any of these VAs have drama or something. i dont pay attention to the fandoms, except vaguely for Redacted Audios because of the theories and world-building happening there (which the video here doesnt have much to do with), but otherwise i am so fucking ignorant bc i do not look these people up, i just watch their videos. i have been burned too many times by the Steven Universe fandom and other such communities and whatnot to get involved in fandoms i am only casually into, so i just only stick my nose into fandoms/creators i am die-hard into and dont delve into the rest, thanks for understanding if i may be out of the loop ✌️

[candyredmusings]

“Another One Of Those ‘Things My Discord Said’ Sentence Starters.

Things taken from DMs and a few group chats from Discord. CW: NSFT Change / Edit as necessary !

i am literally tom cruise

cum is cool.

[NAME]  is fucked up cus he is straight man

[NAME]  show me your fuckin tits

[NAME], you better not be standing catatonic in your room wearing your handmade jigsaw robe again.

its like they creampied me but instead of cum it was new music

like what about my pussy-area makes u think sea cucumber

the mind is weak. but the body is funky

so im reading that fanfic where 1d like, buys your soul or whatever and im shook

well tom servo is a sex god

and then i freaked it

FUCK YOU APPLE JACK FUCK

ILL SLURP WITH YOU

LEMME SHOW U DICK

ITS A SIDE QUEST YOU SILLY BITCH

I’m a zombie the law can’t stop me

LEAVE YOUR GOLDEN UNCRUSTABLES OUT OF MY HOME I WILL NOT FALL VICTIM TO THY TRICKERY

you, telling me to ignore a twink with side swept brown hair? foolish.

Hes so hot i briefly started texting like a straight person

and because I’m god and I’ve decided that. No. In fact. I’m not done.

MY DUMB BOTTOM BRAIN FOLLOWS COMMANDS TOO WELL

[NAME], I know you love bloopy reggae jams. Now is not the time

OH THATS WHAT I THOUGHT YOUD SAY YOU STUPID ACCIDENTAL HIMBO DEMON

man i rlly am attracted to paul mccartney.

its not that kennedy was gay af sleeping w jackies fat ass out, he just has a better one-

jealous of my massive honkeers

YOU BRAINCELLED BITCH

this forced open my third eye and i saw the devil--

oh me seeming romantically interested in u is making u uncomfortable?? noted

the only pussy this party city shake out wig looking mother fucker is getting

[NAME]  expose your teeth right fucking now

IN THE DEPARTMENT OF OLD MAN FUCKING, WEVE GOT YOU BEAT

What if we kissed while one of us got called racist and we are both boys

i just jacked it to minecraft piss porn

I will pop a huge tentacle boner

i hate females fr fr

we left u to die to play minecraft

IM GONNA FRICKLE-FRACK YOUR WIFE

CAN I KARATE CHOP IT LIKE IN SPONGEBOB

DWIGHT FROM THE OFFICE IS NOT MY SKRUNKLY

she would never ever take away one of these stupid fucking hats

My brother in Christ you’re being haunted

i want to wring you like a wet towel and slap u against a wall

Yeah you'll come to learn I just have a thing for milk

Piss ur pants harder pls I wanna watch

I'm gonna corn on the kill myself

good morning to parappa and his stans. everyone else..... hi ig

lol look at this clown with no slurs

God has abandoned his children but unfortunately for you I pay child support and I will smite thee.

this is how I reveal myself to be homophobic

I have no sluts

idk what it is abt it but boba makes me become like an actual whore

im homophobic suddenly

he was like ‘You're so big”.... and i just started crying

anyones penis can be hard hes not special

for the love of god please help me

i can talk about piss for hours

im sorry i havent recognized mickey mouse clubhouse ost as the cultural landmark that it is

I ASKED IF WE WOULD RP AFTER FUCKING BIBLE STUDY OR WHATEVER

the benefits of being a yandere is that i dont have to forgive OR forget and I am a living breathing PVP zone so Fuck with me white boy.

When toxic by ashnikko comes on I enter the gaslight gatekeep phases of my girlbosshood

im like a child in line for the newest fucked up disney ride

[NAME] is just all fucking Sorts of fucked up

im clownfaking

why are we here? to suffer? every other day i get messages from a whore

always thinking abt when my friend called me a "white boy whore"

you gotta PUMP the errand girl with cocaine

im beyond shame bc i love all cock try again

people have fetishes.

They really do crucify anyone these days huh

u may have never hungered for cock but you have hungered for a sub sandwich and honestly? theyre basically the same thing-

hi im drawing hentai

[NAME] idk why but that really. makes me want to stab you

“Don't have sex FOMO, [NAME], no! “

“TRY AND NUKE THIS, BITCH.”

“There's a group of golden skeletons behind you hitting the griddy “

“GRANDPA’S ASHES SUCKED MY COCK AND TOOK ME TO ARBYS.”

“You’re lanky with no gender and silly goofy with the rizz it works.”

“You can’t just tell me I could be a Tumblr sexy man to my face at 4:30 PM.”

"I have strong opinions about the soviet union"

“CALL THAT PUSSY THE MATRIX CAUSE IM IN THIS BITCH AND I CANT GET OUT “

“dont cry. 8000 types of reptiles on the planet, okay?”

[NAME] lives his life like he’s an RPG character but picks only the rude dialogue options.”

“I need to beat off to this before God destroys California.”

"No amount of pussy could get me on a rollercoaster with three loops"

"I love your senior citizen pussy"

"Gerber is pretty reliable .. I mean .. The Gerber baby didn't die .... did it?"

“you are white i assume”

"I hate you terrorist, and you may quote me on that"

"I love watching you play minecraft. It's like watching a baby fawn."

"I've never seen old men who fuck harder."

"i don't need him to KILL i need him to FUCK ME"

"well maybe if you just dicked down your wife she wouldn't have gone on a murderous slut rampage"

"why cant these BIG titty bimbos stop HANGING around me"

[cerealmonster15]

🧃🍦🌸🌸🌸

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

HMM. tbh i feel like i say a lot about my personal self here LOL for people that read my tag rambles what i can i say that u dont already know... i feel like the only stuff i omit is like, to keep my identity a SECRET lol ummm.

ok i literally couldnt think of anything JSDKLFJDSKLFJSDKLJ. ask me a question if u want maybe ill share LOL

🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate

H. HEY. HEY. i dont wanna LOL JKFLDJKFLDS truth be told i dont actually HATE hate many characters. it's usually only ones that are like. token creep characters or REALLY super nasty and i dont WANNA talk about those so im gonna CHEAT and just do what i suspect im baited into doing and talk about a character i. hmm. Used To Strongly Dislike. i was a hater but i dont know that i ever really FULLY hated him. but i def disliked him for a while at first lol

and in terms of twst there are at least four characters this could be describing but i have to do leona bc ive had the most character development with my feelings about him kljsdklfjdsklfjklsdj

he really is so smart and perceptive. it's super interesting when i go back and reread stories and how he's shown to either directly or maybe heavily implied to know/suspect something that's going on far before most of the other characters do. he doesnt always. say anything about it to people 🧍 JKFLSDJFKLDS but it IS cool how you can see he's like, paying attention. he's got experience!

it's kinda sweet when he actually does, sometimes, show his care for the younger students. like in rook's lab coat story when epel accidentally bumps into him, and the npc talking to rook is like OH GOD!!! but rooks like nono, it's okay, leona knows not to just pick a fight with a random student for no reason. <- me calling it sweet when leona doesnt bitch at someone i guess LOL but!!! jfkdsjflds it is. and then in book 6 at the start when everyones getting ROBOT KIDNAPPED, this goes hand in hand with my first point - leona recognized the charon soldiers, clocked that they were dangerous, fighting was futile and risky, and just surrendered himself and told ruggie to not start a fight and to just look after the dorm while he was gone, if he ever came back. i was sooooo grumpy at that scene for so long bc of how COOL he was and i did not like admitting leona was being cool ever LOL JFKLSJDFKLDSJLJ but he was 😔 ive come to terms with it. AND in the jpn server's halloween event playful land, [mild beginning of event spoilers to anyone reading this i guess lol] the fact that he showed up late at night to bring everyone back so they wouldnt get in themselves trouble.... like he SAID it's bc he just didnt wanna get blamed for it later, but like, iirc he aimed his lecture at the ENTIRE GROUP, not just jack who he's dorm responsible for. he showed up early morning/middle of the night to do it too, when hes the king of I Love Sleeping. he probably coulda sent ruggie to do it but it was his turn to be in the event so he came and did it himself;;; dskfjdlsjfk listen i think leona is pretty straightforward and a bitch but i do think he still has some sense of care for people even though he'd rather die than admit it KFJSDKLFJSELJ

this might be cheating but i listed like three separate examples in the prev point so whatever. he's funny when he fights with vil and malleus JKLFJDSKLFJDSLFJ and i like when characters bitch at each other for comedic purposes. that is a positive point in my book i like LAUGHING at my SCREEN

i love when im asked a simple question and use ten thousand words to answer lol

🌸 ⇢ do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them

DOES THAT MEAN THREE IMAGES

[WAHOO!!]

[gothsuguru]

KAIRO MY BELOVED im breaking in again w cookies and flowers 🍪🍪💐💐 for u!! 

i was gonna thank u for ur rb in the replies but my comment got too long 😭😭 U ALWAYS SAY THE SWEETEST THINGS I JUST WANT TO THANK U PROPERY…. 💔💔 but also!! while im here!!! tysm for ur tags on the gojo fics 🥺🥺 i dont want this to get too long phshdjs it will but i appreciate literally every single one of ur words & i always agree w ur stsg takes u just Get them…  im especially happy that u enjoyed the poly fic hehe u & satoru are suguru’s babies so true!! he loves u soo much <33 told me to give u a kiss on the forehead from him <333

anyway THANK YOU SO MUCH <33 for ur tags on the sugu fic everytime i see u in my notifs i giggle and kick my feet genuinely. IM SO GLAD THE SUMMER VIBE HIT …. i listened to uncomfortable while reading ur tags what a banger AND IM SOOO HAPPY U LIKED DRUNK!SUGU he’s so special to me…. ”papabear turned babybear” NO EXACTLY u always get it…. AND WAHHH U NOTICED THE 3S????? ur so observant and thoughtful im so touched 😭😭😭 it always feels like you’re a scientist and my fics are lil fish that you’re dissecting under a microscope lmao IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY <3333 i cant tell u how overjoyed i am that the ending hit too!!! seriously!!! i was a lil worried that i made it too sappy so that felt so reassuring 🥺🥺

in conclusion TYSM FOR BLESSING ME W UR THOUGHTS mwah mwah MWAH i hope u have a lovely day kairo!! pls invite me to the wedding when u marry sugu <333 ill bring u gifts!!

ARI PLEASEEEEEEE WHY ARE YOU THE MOST SWEETEST PRECIOUS ADORABLE PERSON ON THE PLANET I’M IN TEARS 🥹🩷 the way you always connect w people & be so kind to them… sniffles just know I Would Die For You <3 & THE GOJO FICS & POLY!SATOSUGU FIC LITERALLLLLLLLY REWIRED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY……… literally felt like i was IN the stories it was insane in the best way possible 😭 A SMOOCH FROM SUGU YOU SAY??? a kiss from a bad bitch like him is literally all i want in life thank you legend

AHHHHHHH LISTENNNNNNN THE DRUNK!SUGU FIC WAS SO FUCKING SWEET LIKENDNDDNND literally had ME giggling twirling my hair kicking my feet etc……… & YOU LISTENED TO THE SONG??? 🥹 uncomfortable is one of my favs and it always gave me evening summer vibes so when i listened to it while reading your fic… oh it just hit SO good <3 seeing sugu’s soft sensitive side was so precious 2 me i feel like i don’t often see that in fics and WHEW you did it so well <333

AND THE THREES I’M SO FOND OF THE THREES!!!!! omfg not me in my kenjaku shoko dissection era……… methinks kenjaku & shoko would love to dissect your brain (massive compliment) bc the way you think of & write your stories…… oh just DELICIOUS. & YES THE ENDING WAS PERFECTTTTTTTT!!!!!! literally the perfect amt of sap it actually felt really cozy :’)

ALSO THANK YOU SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO MUCH FOR YOUR TAGS ON THAT LIL TEASER SNIPPET IT LITERALLY MADE ME SO :’) as i was writing it i was like damn this shit is choppy as hell smh BUT I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE SERPENT FANGS & REMORSE DISCERNING WHERE TO RESIDE HEHEHEHE <3 your tags made me feel so much better so thank you again :’)

THANK YOU FOR BLESSING US W YOUR FICS LIKE OMFG??? JUST BANGERS EVERYTIME HOW DO YOU DO IT??? i get so excited whenever you come out w a new story it’s like christmas morning fr <3 AND OFMFMDMD TRUST that you’re invited to mine & sugu’s wedding <333 you can bring shoko as your plus one <3 I HOPE YOU HAVE THE BEST DAY EVER I HOPE IT’S AS WONDERFUL AS YOU ARE :’) MWAH MWAH MWAH <3

[bunnyb34r]

We're doing inventory at work and everyone is at their fucking LIMIT and pissed bc we have TWO WEEKS to get everything counted... motherfucker you bitch ab us not being like other stores but other stores would've had this started two MONTHS ago

More under the cut bc it's a lot

I got most of children's done but there's no fucking room bc we cannot have any boxes behind boxes... and they keep harking that we have no room in the steel, AND that the dock has to be EMPTY

Bitch where the fuck are we supposed to put this stuff then?? Up our ass??? There's only so much we can stock and we can't stock and recover AND do inventory like we are so shorthanded it's insane

And this one guy who is incompetent as fuck but not as much as his wife, went on a RANT during a meeting the other day ab how he and his wife work their asses off (they absolutely do not) and that he DOES sort the pallets and basically bitching ab all the things he does and how it's EVERYONE ELSE'S fault that things aren't getting counted/the pallets remain mixed

You know what he does? He puts the items on pallets by department, which yes good, and then leaves them in said areas like okay byeeeeee 🤗

Where what you're SUPPOSED TO DO is stock those items yourself OR wrap the pallets and have someone put them in the steel for you

BaldBastard was like "I hear you, but this is a conversation for you and the managers. You can't be telling your coworkers what to do, that's OUR job (and we all work different sections so him working hardlines and his wife working grocery for example)

And I stg [Relative coworker] was gonna blow a gasket this morning bc I went to grab tape and the count papers and NewLady said to me

"Hey can you help me? They said we're supposed to do something with these (count papers) and..."

Mind you WE SHOWED HER TWICE NOW HOW TO DO THEM and they're fucking self explanatory bc it looks like

|item number| |quality|

Space for # space for #

Space for # space for #

Space for # space for #

So you... write the item number... and how many are in a box or how many you have on a pallet...

So I told her I'd have RC do it and RC was in the back so I went to tell her and she YELLED affsvdvdgdg she was so mad

And incompetent man's wife asked no joke six different people how you do the papers...

Like this is so fucking easy it's painful man

And I guess TeamLead had been showing her how to do the papers yesterday and she fucking said "oh ill ask RC tomorrow. She can show me"

I fucking stood there and went 😐 when Rc told me sgdgdgdggdgd like are you fucking kidding me

And I think she asked ME bc she wanted me to explain it bc she fucking hates everyone in our section but me but I just did not have that kinda patience today so I'm like uh ill have her show you sgdggdg RC wasn't happy with me ab that but she understood

Anyway it's so fucking stupid and I don't think we did this last year?? Bc I dont remember it but I think it might have been bc thats when BossMan got fired and we were without a store manager for months lmao

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

LOL let me clarify and not make her sound like the worst person in the world. she did kinda ask if i wanted to go, but i had a test that morning and they are leaving like an hour before my exam starts. but whats getting me is that she keeps talking about it. and im like queen i love you so much, but PLEASE STOP. and its the way literally last night i was talking to my roommate about it and she was like 'wait what shes going??' and i was like yea and literally started crying. and she was like i thought the tickets were like really expensive and i was like well her parents bought them for her... and my roommate was like oh. so yea, it really is just me being a bitch. and shes like ill be sure to send you pics! and i was like please dont bc i think that will be my final straw!! so sorry for the long ask, and this is super unrelated, but did you hear that liam payne from one direction died?? im not even sure if you know or care about them, but i feel like i have to tell everyone that i know bc its so wild. anyway, hope ur doing well queen! and sorry for all the yapping LOL

~ from a 🏁 anon who has never felt jealousy in her life until now

she still sounds… interesting 🤨 (i’m kidding if she’s your friend then she’s your friend)

it does sound like she can’t take a hint though lmao. it isn’t you being a bitch!! I know jealousy is inherently a negative emotion, but it’s a completely normal thing to feel from time to time. as long as you can recognise that that’s what it is, there’s no real harm in it usually. we all feel it sometimes.

and omg yes I saw all the stuff about liam, it’s crazy. wasn’t a fan of his personally but I really do feel for his family and his son :(

[minniweekss]

sit your ass down this is a long one

idk what the fuck has been wrong with me lately but all i ever feel is rage. everything pisses me the fuck off. mom woke me up at 10:30, bad mood. yesterday i woke up at 1:30pm, pissed tf off. also dropped my coffee on my new shoes yesterday and then proceeded to knock my entire 24ounce tumbler of coffee off my desk and all over my fucking carpet so now im even more pissed off trying to clean this fuck shit up with stupid ass paper towels knowing that my carpet is now fucked forever.

now heres the embarassing part. my mom witnessed my entire rage fit. screaming, flailing, throwing shit around my room and quite literally destroying my room just because some coffee spilled on my run. quite literally was my last straw.

now lets throw it back to the 26th, my birthday. I wake up with fucking covid (didnt know it was covid until the 28th). My mom leaves for NC that morning. we were supposed to do a birthday breakfast but since i was sick she just straight up left and we didnt do anything. so i spent the weekend alone with mike. Friday night i spent alone in my room with my little piece of cake and Love Island. then i went to work the next day (with a mask ofc) and worked a 9.5 hour shift while swaying and seeing black spots. oh lemme mention it was opening weekend of the new deadpool movie so it was fucking busy to say the least.

Anyways this whole weekend im literally alone. me myself and i. mom comes back, suddenly mike is sick. guess what? she buys him soup, fruit, juice, medicine, literally anything he needs. When i told my mom i had covid and was taken off the work schedule for the rest of the week she told me i should have said my test was negative so i could work anyways. ma'am im fucking sick with a very contagious disease are you fucking fr. while you're letting mike sit here and act like hes on his fucking death bed. suuuuuure.

now lets back it up even more to the weekend before my birthday. i had to celebrate that weekend bc i couldnt get the weekend of the 26th off bc of, you guessed it, deadpool. anyways. we were taking this blacksmithing class that i had my eye on for MONTHS. now im the one in the group to be known as the fantasy/medieval lover. i was quite literally writing a book about a blacksmith so. I was extremely excited for this class and i was trying to keep up with pics and videos of the progress cuz it looked like none of my friends were taking videos. I noticed a few here and there but didnt really think of it cuz i was so focused on making my knife. we get out of the class and back home and im sending all the pics and vids that i took and they did the same, and there were a lot more videos than i thougt. not a single one was me. i dont want to sound like a bitch saying like oh record me im important, no. But i was very excited for the class and i was trying my best to get videos of my own progress and they literally saw me doing that and didnt think to get a video of me making it? every single person that was in my group got a nice video of them tinkering away, while im seen in the background of the videos.

like quite literally one of them got a video of her doing each fucking step. why tf was i being ignored. they were barely even talking to me dude they were all talking to each other and im over here like ok i guess ill just focus on my knife then. there were a lot of cool tricks i was doing with the instructor, but i couldnt take a video bc blacksmithing needs both fucking hands. and i was too embarassed to ask for a video. i feel like i shouldnt have to ask..... the trick we did was called a double strike. the instructor did it with one of my friends and literally everyone whipped their phone out for a video. then a few mins later he came up to me and asked if i wanted to try and i was so excited. it was making me feel like a orc in mordor or something i thought this shit was so fucking cool. anyway we start, and i look around and not one person is even watching. cool.

idk i usually really dont like photos or videos of me cuz i hate the way i look so much, but this is probably the one thing i wanted a video of and didnt get one. i should have fucking asked them to take videos but i didnt think about it until we were home and i noticed that everyone else got a video of themselves. i was like "oh!" so i couldnt really post for my birthday cuz i didnt fucking have any pictures to post. literally all i got is a group picture with the instructors.....

to be fucking honest it felt like i was the third wheel when it was my planned event. not even just an event, but my 25th birthday. i feel like ever since then ive been agitated and annoyed all the time, especially with my friends. im becoming short tempered with them now. i dont think its a direct correlation to the blacksmithing at all i think its cuz my attitude has been so sour lately.

this post is all over the place so bear with me ok. im gonna jump around a lot. another thing that sets me off is when i text my friends either questions or plans i need them to confirm and they take 5 fucking day to respond to me, like shit i dont fucking need it now. idk i just cant be friends with someone who wont answer my messages like how the fuck are we supposed to talk if you dont even respond. im talking to myself at this point.

and my close close friends do this to me too so its making me become more distant with them because my biggest mode of communication is through text. because realistically i NEVERRRRRRRR see my friends. its a once every three months event okay. so you cannot judge me for being a big texter and wanting my friends to respond to me. i really dont want to feel like im fucking begging for your attention. i shouldnt HAVE to beg for your attention. I pretty much have two friends i send everything to and they're both out of state so... i cant even get my fucking in state friends to talk to me.

all of this to say im angry and lonely. im always angry in some form, im like the fucking hulk bro it takes the smallest fucking thing to set me off. and im so lonely all the fucking time cuz as you can tell, my friends dont fucking text me, i dont have any siblings either so its like wtf do i do. The only time i get human interaction is at work with stupid fucking customers. also dont have a partner cuz i didnt experience romantic love in high school or college so i fear its over for me. 25, havent been in a single relationship. not even joking bro not 1. ive had maybe 3 people like me before: my friend in HS when i wasnt even romantically processing things yet, a dude from work who only wanted to fuck, and a friend from college who iced me out when i said no.

idk i think thats SO comforting only having 3 people in your entire 25 years to be interested in you. that i know of at least. but out of those 3, only 1 asked me out so its like ok. even when i go out with friends they're the ones that get approached or flirted with by everyone. like at blacksmithing dude the cute instructors were flirting w all my friends and then when they got to me they'd be talking all business... cool thanks i get it im ugly as shit ok. i dont think theres ever been a girl or guy in public thats even checked me out. girls dont even go for me so thats fucking great. idk dude this type of shit makes me feel like im genuinely ugly. i know thats probably not true but thats how i see myself and how ive seen myself for years. i have never liked my face. ever. its always been my biggest insecurity. when covid first started and we wore masks i was fucking thriving having half my face covered. i looked so much better.

cant even try dating apps bc im demisexual so i cant even build a connection like that. and this time is all about hook up culture and friends w benefits its like i dont want that shit bro. i want an emotional connection with someone first before it gets physical because im fucking scared. I already hate myself so why would i let some stranger see my gross naked body bro ew. i cant do this dating shit brother i am genuonely about to be single for the rest of my goddamn life. which might be the end of me considering no one can fucking afford to live by themselves anymore and i REALLY dont want to live with a friend and their partner cuz that would just make me fucking depressed about my own love life.

screw the fucking world. im over this stupid ass shit dude, people fucking suck. relationships suck. friends suck. work sucks. life fucking sucks. cant afford to do anything, 25, still living at my fucking moms house. its like im stuck int he same spot and not moving forward. time seriously stopped in 2020 cuz what the fuck do you mean im 25 and not 20. i lost sooo much time to the pandemic and it made me worse. it made me more anxious, more depressed, more scared to go outside and enjoy life. like i used to be so productive. I was going to school and working 40 hrs a week. and now im only working 42hrs a week and i can barely get out of bed on my days off.

as i get older it just seems like life gets worse and worse. like i dont see this picking up at all. i literally only see a downward spiral from here.

life is absolute hell that is only sprinkled with good moments. idk if the good moments are enough to outweigh the bad at this point. idek if i want to make it to 30. im so miserable here. i dont even have any family in this stupid state except my mom. llike i dont have siblings and i barely have a fucking family either. dont talk to my aunt or cousins, dont talk to my oma cuz she hates me, barely talk to my other grandparents bc they're insane. its like i literally only have my mom. ,everyone else i know can go swing by their cousins place and hang out or spend the night. ive never been able to do that. my aunt left the state two months before my mom had me. like literally everyone related to me has moved away. like if i was close with my cousins at least thered be SOME family i could actually talk to and be close to. nah dude. its just me and my mom, literally. that is so fucking sad.

god help me bro

[dreamdripdistance]

actually yknow what. i Am fucking miserable. re deleted post noone read bc i got scared, yknow what maybe im not fine maybe im actually really not doing well and i never am!??

i dont even!!! i !!!! none of what im typing makes sense but how are people so brazen about talking about this!!! how do people do it??? because im gonna delete this in the morning if someone asks and im gonna be like haha im okay dw i was just having a moment when im not!!! i AM okay im SAFE or whatever and im not hashtag depressed im just hashtag ill and it bleeds into every part of my life and i do shitty things to deal with it . im Not going to kill myself, i dont even like making jokes about that!!!!

idk i feel insane am i just a little too mentally ill to talk about it outside of a clinical setting bc thats what i feel like? like i literally heard a coworker joke about a suicide attempt he went through (and another imply she went thru a very similar thing), but since it was in the past and only once (from what i could gather) does that mean that He gets to talk about it?

but yknow what its fucking isolating not being able to talk about the shit i deal w everyday!!! like yeah i sh! it sucks! i make it too easy for myself to do it! i officially cant wear tshirts now! but at this point in time its the only thing that is making me feel like im not going to fall into an abyss of guilt and hatred and its the only tools to cope with it since i was 12 so we're just going with it!

i want so badly to talk about it because i hate feeling like ive been left out to sea with this shit but also its mortifying and its Current and Scary so noone wants to hear it without having triple zero ready. even though im literally not in mortal danger! why am i always told to go seek professionals when its like. i dont need professionals right now i need comfort and companionship because i Am safe. im cared for even if the coping mechanism is scary and harmful but im fucking alone!!!! and that's worse!!!!!

whatever! bitch! im okay and cared for physically and im safe im just fucking lonely and i just wanna talk to someone without it being a federal fucking issue is this like. wrong?? bc i dont actually know!!! maybe what i want isnt what is clinically correct or whatever. not best practice or some shit. idk. i need to go to bed

[frostbite-the-bat]

goofy ass ms paint werewolf eating a mango as a divider between the rant under this bc i do not wish to be precieved rn but i still wanna rant some thoughts out

random lovely guzma urge to delyeet everythin on myne site bc not only did i make it for petz things back when i was active between petz folks and got some encouragement there and ended up never finishing petz things for it, but i also feel horrible and uncommited for it being hosted and made on weebly and for bein too lazy to yeet my shit over to neocities just cause that shit gives me a headache and instead of getting inspired by people i feel jealous and unwelcome

also been working on my sleep schedule its a bit better now and im like. better in general now..? idk how long i can keep this up but getting up early makes me just. so tired like all day urgh i do not understand how i used to keep myself up when this tired. tired tired. brain empty. hard to do shit for long. defo needs more breaks but i swear to god everything feels like its frying my brain but i got nothin to do indoors. guess i can go draw traditionall but i end up putting such high expectations on myself i just yeah. fuck it up. get stressed. not fun. i need to stop thinking about others bc i keep thinking i put effort into smthn i need to show it off.like if i wasted time here i might as well. no this isnt showable it sucks damn it

even stuff i do draw purely for myself as self indulgent shit i go urhh this aint right

oh and then i try doin a lil excercise so im not like. physically diyng but my god that tires me out like instantly. but its okay, baby steps.

dont know what sort of place i am in mentally. the type id prolly spiral a bit over if it werent nice and 2 pm. wacky stuff. i wanna maybe do some stuff but ugh my brain just. isnt big thoughts when im tired. but honestly when am i not tired. and i am getting art done but i cant get myself to draw all day again ill end up in pain again my hand rn already is being a bit of a bitch

uhhh played pokemon in the morning but i need better pokemon already. i fuck up every raid (raids i need so i can get better mons easier) (and my shiny ralts i want easier)

hmm maybe i need a break from stuff but what kinda break what even is relaxing in my case? and "break from people" is a slippery slope of self isolation i always slip into. bit difficult to figure myself out

also, different thing, but ive been considering this for a good few months now and kinda ignoring it but i read one (1) thing and i m intrigued to do more n more research now but man do not like how moral ocd clicks perfectly with a lot of my most common issues . so i guess thats a thing to consider going into (like research) . if it helps .bc dear god i am Sensitive

but uhmmm yea sleeping better now ig like i went to sleep around ONE. my usual sleep time was 5-6 am a while ago !!!!!!! 1 am has always been my kinda usual time. man and i used to do that even when i had school and i *functioned* with less sleep. how did i do that. uhm. not well i guess

but yeah. things.. arent feeling right and i kinda wanna wipe my brain. also the neocities thing seems to be a part of my issue of (ppl who dont care abt me) r gonna thingk i suck bc i dont do (this that i find difficult) (coding) i will be exploded forever and shunned andhated

uhmmm what else yea last thought i forgot as i was gonna type it and the last thing i am deciding not to share anyway bc Shame so hooray

guy who is eeypy tired

i am just realizing how like tired i am but if i go nap ill make it worse so uhmm cope i guess lmfao at least it keeps me going to sleep at a more regular hour but like srsly brain we got around 8 hours of sleep why are you tired we used to get less and function fine. maybe not as good but we functioned

[worldwright]

Good evening ! ill be reading crackships after the day i just had bc wtf

I finally could get my meds, had some issues regarding that, but my usual pharmacy was nice enough to not care and just handed me my meds for free (im not paying for those things, they don't work at all but i still need to take them)

Im so exhausted, I cant ;-; dont wanna be tomorrow, have a very important call that's useless i have to answer

I KNOW what I'm thinking about kinda sounds bad and is NOT a good idea AT ALL, but I just want to make another attempt, same as last time, just to get some rest for fuck's sake, don't feel rested since September and no news about the psych ward (i think they didn't actually add me to the waiting list, i know it's bad to insinuate that but it's france, everything mental health related is some real shit so it's not that farfetched)

but alas, i cant do that again, because first i like walking, second im waiting for 4 important things (my id, one of the two things i need for 'free' healthcare, the bad i ordered, and finally my doctor's eyes' appointment that i finally have, omg, ill be able to finally have some glasses that fit my eyes, oh do i want them now)

ugh, why am i dealing with so many medical issues, oh yeah i have free healthcare bc france but good lord would it kill them to actually do something that works for once ??????

also, unrelated, someone asked me if i sold or if i knew someone who sold drugs when we were on the bus, that was fun ngl. why would i go do smth illegal when i can be high with my prescribed meds if i dose them right lol

Have a wonderful morning my friend !

goddamn isn't it. so fucking fantastic. that nobody takes mental health seriously unless there's obvious tangible attempts at literal death. that being said you better fuckin not. who will kick the asses of the dickwads managing the psych ward if you don't

obviously I don't expect you to go commit violence lmfao, but like. spite

lol my manager keeps dropping more projects on me. it's like yeah I was confident I could finish those four drawings in time but now there are six. oh you have another one? bitch

I gotta start taking advantage of my medical insurance lol. I switched to a different plan that's ostensibly better, but it takes money out of my paycheck so like. I'm gonna go use that goddamn health insurance. funny how that works. luckily there's a clinic literally one block from my apartment

it's supposed to snow this weekend.... I need to stock up on groceries in case I get locked in (oh no how terrible, having to stay home oh nooooo lmao)

ughhhhh I need to move closer to my friends!!!! I cannot live alone I keep making too much food!! and I'm notoriously bad at eating leftovers!! looking at apartment listings is keeping me alive until I can fuck off out of Seattle

(not that I hate seattle, it's just too far from friends. also it's loud)

hope you have a wonderful and relaxing evening!!

[whatsnothappening]

stopped my last entry bc i didnt really have much to say but heres whats up PT.3

tomorrows Thursday and im off work. im currently awake at 2:30 in the morning so i dont know how early im going to be waking up but i am going to make sure that i am productive. i want to do laundry i want to clean my bathroom and clean our bedroom. i want to clean the kitchen and organize the fridge. i can get all that done. i know i can. it is all discipline. i need to work on that. one step at a time. i am going to start tomorrow off with getting coffee started. and enjoying breakfast. i am not going to sit forever. maybe watch one tv show and that is it. get up. and get to work. i complain about how miserable i am because my house is a mess and i cant be productive and florish. well nothings going to change if i dont fix it. yes my husband can do some shit but oh well. he cooks and cleans and helps out a little. so i cant really bitch too much. but i am going to make sure that i am productive tomorrow. so that way i feel accomplished. i feel like if i keep myself busy and i stay active then ill be able to sleep better at night. hahhahahaha thats funny. i never fucking sleep. im kind of thinking about taking melatonin again. it was working alright. but it started fucking with me waking up but i think i was taking too high a of a dose. ill figure it out. i dont really think i have too much more to say. i am feeling pretty positive right now. i kind of just wanted to journal so i could fall asleep. ive noticed that has helped me a bit. get some shit off of my mind and then fall right to sleep. and i will say i am getting fucking tired lol. i think im gonna end this here. i did have more to say but there is always tomorrow. i feel good. goodnight.