#bc i don't even feel like sleep is a good idea and i keep failing to sleep but i feel trapped in bed until i succeed

[confinesofmy]

i don't know what's wrong with me but i keep waking up every 1-3 hours going "aw man, it's still tonight. :/ i don't know how tf i'm getting back to sleep." i keep getting 5 hours of sleep over the course of 9. this sucks.

[prettyboykatsuki]

— ❈ YOU'RE SO PRETTY, BABY.

▸ prompt ; companions and their responses to being called pretty boy / pretty girl.

▸ a/n ; bit of a generic post im sorry forreal. while i was originally just going to write this for astarion i had ideas for. all the other companions.

most of the characters have a reader w a specific class or background, all varied! also spoilers for gale, shadowheart, karlach, and lae'zel.

reader / tav is always gender neutral!

▸ wc ; about 4.5k, about 700+ words per companion.

ft. astarion, wyll, gale, shadowheart, karlach, lae'zel

no minthara or halsin bc i could not bring myself to write it. but maybe later if enough people ask lol.

❈ ASTARION ;

Astarion tries his very best to find your affection for him trite, even when he knows it doesn't feel that way. It's an instinct for him, one you'll simply have to make peace with you if you're really planning on tailing him to the end of the world.

Truth be told though, he likes your generally affectionate nature. He hasn't reached a point he can admit this so openly, but the comfortable and easy way you reach for him is nice. He likes how your hands seem to stretch for him, the way you cling to his spine when you sleep in his tent and the likes.

And while he is not stranger to hypocrisy, he thinks it'd be amiss to try and bar you from calling him any pet names when he calls you so many. He's got quite a few handy. Darling is a favorite, followed by dear, and sometimes my love when he can muster up the courage to mean it instead of saying it like he's trying to perform.

You like to call Astarion by his name though, most often. He isn't exactly sure why you're so fond of it, and truthfully he's done little to consider his own name. You say it wonderfully though, tasteful and loving and soft.

Sometimes you gasp it in offense or horror or shock, other times in pleasure. Sometimes you whimper it in your sleep, groping around until your hands fist in the material of his shirt and you drag him back to you.

In any case, he's used to hearing his name. So hearing you utter the words pretty boy to him, he can't help but be a little shocked.

You're a little tipsy. A hard, arduous journey of fighting githyanki soldiers has taken a terrible toll on your normal inhibitions. You're quite flushed while you're drunk, and all the same sitting in his lap like you've not a care in the world.

Astarion doesn't mind holding you. In fact, he's thinking of all the terribly teasing things he can say to you come morning. So far, you've done nothing but mumble. It's a sudden movement, your hands clasped around his face.

"Feeling forward are we darling?" He says, like second nature. It's so reactionary it's banal, though he does have some enthusiasm since the flirtation is directed at you. Instead of your usual giggling, you stare at him with your lips parted.

"I suppose I am pretty boy," You reply, a completely foreign confidence in your voice that stops him dead in his tracks. Underneath the thick layer of flirtation is sincerity so unmistakable it almost proves to be too much "Could I ask you to keep me company?"

Astarion is, eternally grateful about the fact you don't get much more than that out of you. He spends the entire night thinking about it. You're certainly not the first to call him pretty, and that particular phrasing has been thrown to him more than once.

Yet it rings a little differently. The way you said it so tenderly, your hands stroking the nape of his neck and cupping his face. Well, it's not nothing. He can't decide if he hates it or not until the next morning comes.

Your eyes flutter open as light pours through the open part of his tent. You reach over to him with a deep sigh, engaging in some quiet morning affection when you repeat yesterdays sentiment.

"Good morning, my very pretty boy," You say - and this time Astarion is sure whatever he is feeling he has not ever felt previously "Sorry for the antics last night."

"So your memory hasn't failed you. Good to know." Astarion says back. You laugh lightly. "Your charming little pet name worried me quite a bit."

"Nothing to worry about my love." You say, warm and nuzzling into his neck likely to cool yourself from over-heating "I really do find you very pretty."

He can't help the feeling that floods his sense. He likes it even though he feels a little clingy, but perhaps there's no need to admit that.

"Oh, really, darling? How sweet you are. Tell me again, then. Just for kicks this time."

❈ WYLL ;

it's a matter of getting used to it for Wyll.

For the first month of your adventuring together, pretty boy, had been a somewhat condescending substitute for his name. Among other ones, like daddy's boy and prince. None of the pet names held any real affection.

You liked getting under his skin, after all.

You didn't get on at first, not for a long while. You're a rogue, a ratty street urchin turned mercenary who'd spent your youth climbing through the soil and mud of the Lower City's underbelly. Your words verbatim, not his. At first, your resentment for him caught him off guard, especially because Wyll prefers to keep the peace and get along with everyone. But, he had a difficult time understanding you, even with his people skills

Eventually it clicked that your resentment was less towards him, and more towards what he represents. You're a Baldurian, but one abandoned by the city and it's people. What else could the Ravengards represent if not the future you never had a chance to look towards.

It was easier after that. And Wyll had promised to himself to observe you closer. In that, he found to like you a great deal.

He's fond of pet names in general, but more fond of you lately. At the beginning of your adventure, it was a little difficult to get accustomed to your... roughness. You lack delicacy, but you're not exactly silver tongued.

Yet, you're not as cruel as you make yourself out to be. Contrarily, while you've traveled together, Wyll bore witness to only gentleness. Nothing more. The words you spoke about only doing things for coin had been clearly disproved by your countless acts of charity. Especially gentle and kind to children, and especially unforgiving to the rich and unhelpful.

Once he got used to it, there was something kind of...sweet about it. To see you say one thing and do another had it's own novelty that Wyll grew fond of you.

It was the night of tiefling party that roused his feelings. That night, he'd watched you play with the tiefling children all night, teaching them tricks of the trade.

And you'd started falling for him, too, judging by the way your usual snark was nowhere to be found.

Especially vivid is the change in your tone when you call him the same way you did before.

"We'll take a short rest for you, pretty boy." Your voice murmurs, looking carefully over his wounds while place down your own weapons "Get your spells back. Organize our things in the mean time."

He gives you look, examining your own worry before his smile stretches into one of fondness. It doesn't bother him at all, not anymore. No, lately - it sounds rather fond, and each time Wyll hears it, it does something for ego.

"No need for the concern, though I am appreciative," He says, not bothering to mask the smug quality in his voice at your change. He delights in it a little, admittedly . "I'll be alright soon enough."

You don't seem to notice, too busy wiping your blade of fresh blood, metal shiny as moonlight. "And there's no need for your heroism, Blade of Frontiers. Have some discernment about time and place."

You look up at him with your brows furrowed, and Wyll can barely help himself. "Are you worried I'll lose what's left in my appearances? I'm just telling you there's no need to trouble yourself over it."

It takes you a while to register to his words, but when it finally does - your eyes blow wide. The look of embarrassment on your face is well worth it.

"I thought you hated when I called you that." You say coolly.

"It's not so bad," He says back tenderly, staring at you "At least not anymore."

You pout a little. Wyll fights some unspoken urge to kiss you. A little longer.

"I prefer when you're acting oblivious,"

"Sorry to disappoint."

He lets his head lay on the wall behind him - reaching a hand for yours instead, trying to rest up as promised. He sees you smiling from the corner of his eye and affirms it to himself. You squeeze, soft, but otherwise say nothing about it.

Yes, lately, nothing you say could get under his skin. Even when you so obviously try.

❈ GALE ;

Gale is always the poet, never the muse.

He thought highly of his relationship with Mystra, and in many ways still does. He loved her. This much is true. He can't say for any certainty if she had loved him just as much, or at all. He wasn't the first mortal, and would hardly be the last.

But he loved her, enough to write about her and wax poetic about all that he'd lost.

When Gale examines any of his past relationship, he realizes this is some kind of pattern. Gale is good at being loving, but he does not know for certain if any of them loved him back. Or if he was loved in the way he loves - if it was anything near close. Gale had thought, at one point, it was just matter of destiny. Gale is after all, a man who bleeds with all he has.

He can't blame anyone for loving him less than when he is categorically too much. He thought that way for a long time, destined himself to never find love again or beg for Mystra's forgiveness for some new found purpose.

When you came into his life, he hadn't been sure what would come of your relationship. Certainly a brain parasite would make camp a difficult place for romance, but the two of you managed against all odds. Among all the things that Gale finds astonishing about your relationship - it's your affection for him that catches him the most off-guard.

It's a little sad, he can admit. But it's true. When you speak to Gale, your voice is always soft. It's never demanding. Before, always, there had been some kind of expectation. Gale had to be a certain way, to pour himself into someone else for the sake of it being returned.He loved. Surely he loved.

But now, lately, you love him back. Overwhelmingly. The easiness of your love makes him feel a little... spoiled. Which is embarrassing, at the stage of life he's in. He finds the whole thing tips him over the edge. The heat creeping up his neck every time he remembers. Your hand brushing against the back of his neck, cupping his face so gently.

Gale, perhaps unsurprisingly, is fond of your various pet names. All of them sound good. Make him feel important and desired. You like to call him a bookworm, sometimes you call him baby (which he really likes much more than he is ever willing to admit), and other times you settle on saying my love.

Pretty boy is new. Pretty boy is different, and makes heat crawl up the back of Gale's neck like a smitten school boy.

It has a special effect on Gale.

In between classes, spoken with your hands cupping his face as he leans on his desk. The sunlight is pouring through the large paneled windows, casting a warmth on your expression. Gale is sat on his desk, making you eye-level.

"I'm glad you've come to see me," Gale says to you first, breaking a period of comfortable silence. You're a busy person, given all the heroics. Gale finds it troublesome, despite the fact you've moved with him to Waterdeep. Your reputation precedes you "It's been ages,"

"Of course I'd come to see you, pretty boy," You hum, thumb brushing under his cheek - carefully drawing a line "You're very healing to look at."

The effect is rather immediate. As soon as the words leave your lips, spoken to him so lovingly - he unlocks a part of himself he always seems to forget about. Forgets himself in a fundamental way, the flurry of heat and euphoric sensation of adoration washing over him like water.

He gives you a look, and you laugh - pressing your thumb to his lower lip as you lean in for a kiss. "Stop pouting, will you?"

"I'm doing nothing of the sort," He insists, kissing you despite him. You laugh into, warm and bubbly. For a minute, he remembers all he might've lost had he done what Mystra told him.

He's glad he's alive. To feel you.

"You very much are," You reply back, once you've managed to pull away from each other "Don't be so surprised. You've always been very pretty to me."

He blushes again, deeper, and closes his eyes.

❈ SHADOWHEART ;

You don't often communicate your feelings to Shadowheart through words.

You're something of a stoic. Of the few people in Shadowheart's past who remain by her side, many of them communicate about how surprised they are about your partnership. Shadowheart is known to be a little snarky, witty. She used to be very prickly, at the start of your adventure together - so everyone questions how you were able to win her heart.

Truthfully, Shadowheart didn't know what to make of your personality at first. There's a silence to you. Maybe she should expect this of paladin so loyal. A Paladin of Torm, the unswerving enemy of injustice and corruption. You've always been a devout person, putting action and justice over everything. She hated it at first, a natural response for a Sharran, she figures.

Once she'd left it all behind, she could no longer use it as an excuse.

Truth be told, Shadowheart had always liked that aspect of you. Your devotion spoke to something greater than your oath or even your god. You had simply believed in the world, and inadvertently in her. You saved her from herself, her parents from her fate, and then some.

Your devotion to her as a lover isn't something so different. She often thinks you would swear yourself to her if you could. For Shadowheart, your affection is akin to worship. Every morning, the animals are tended and the flower bed is damp. You wake her mother up without a start, remind her of where she is without making her feel ashamed. You're good to her father, talk to him of worldly politics at the dinner table.

She has no complaints to make about you. Your love for her is tangible, something she can reach out and touch with her fingers.

She's unused to hearing your affections, though. Unused to hearing the words.

You lay together in the darkness. You're alone tonight, the entire cabin empty. Her mother and father have gone together on an outing together, after you accompanied them into the city. You've finally returned, put the horses up in the stable, and have to come to her side.

Shadowheart likes to lay in your arms. She lets herself curl into your weight, inhales the scent of your skin - earthy and rich as you let your arm fold around her waist. She lays ontop of you today, her whole body on yours like a blanket.

She looks up at you, her her tied loosely. She can practically feel how glowy her own expression is as she examines you - sees her reflection in your irises.

You let your hand lay over her back, reaching up underneath her nightwear to lay touch her skin. She gives you a look - her smile small, sincere. Your own expression is tired from travel, but fond. You insisted on taking her parents instead of letting them go alone.

She loves you more than she cares to admit.

"You're staring." She comments blithely "See something you like?"

Normally you'd flush a little at this, silent as you kiss her forehead or cheek. This time though, you use your fingers to brush the stray hairs from her face and nod.

"Yes, pretty girl," You hum, nonchalantly. Sagely. "I really do,"

She's so caught off guard, she can't help but gape. She lifts herself slightly to stare at you in shock.

"I've never heard you talk like that. Not once while we've been together. I mean.. you've called me beautiful but," Shadowheart stumbles, a fluttery feeling in her stomach she'd rather ignore "But it's never like that,"

"I think it more often that I say it,"

"And you always think to call me that?"

"Like I said, often," You look over he carefully, before your lips pull into an easy smile "You're pretty to the point I want to tell you all the time,"

Shadowheart is scarcely embarrassed by anything. She's a practiced woman at this point in her life. It's almost juvenile the way the words effect her. It's you saying it that makes all the difference. The way you've said it that makes her squirm. She lets out a little puff of air, silent as you laugh.

"Pretty girl," You repeat, warm and gentle and laced with exhaustion "You're the most beautiful girl I've ever met."

Shadowheart tucks her face into your neck, voice as soft a murmur as the sound of her own heart rings in her ears.

"Don't make a habit of talking like that," She huffs "I already know, but I suppose it doesn't hurt to hear."

You smile brightly. "I'm glad,"

❈ KARLACH ;

Karlach adores you, utterly and completely.

She's a little caught off-guard by it. Just when she'd convinced herself she couldn't love you more, you surprise her all over again. She'd probably harbored some sort of affection for you from the start of your adventure together, when you'd gone to bat for her and make sure Wyll didn't take her head as a trophy.

Since then, though - on your journey together, she'd taken careful notice of you. And gods, she likes you. You're very different she must admit. Where Karlach is strong and fiery, you're cool and calculated. She figured that's just what magic users are like, but Gale is pretty keen on correcting this assumption. You're a sorcerer, specifically, means the whole magic thing is in your composition and not your study.

Which explained why your head isn't the books like their local wizard. She does find you to be rather charming. You're good at talking your way in and out of almost everything, and you can outwit even the cleverest people on camp. You'd think it'd make you... annoying. Or cruel. And sure, you're a little calculating - but mostly, you're sweet.

Karlach's really never met anyone like you before. Her companionship is a little limited because before the Blood Wars, she was a rag-tag kid in the street of the city. But you grew up in a noble house, learned to charm and finesse your way through everything. You know how to read situations before they've even happened.

And you always explain them to her afterwards.

You make Karlach nervous, strangely. Which is wild! When it comes to socializing, she can get along with almost anyone. You though, you always see right through her. You know when she's using her own personality as a shield, and you always know just when to intervene. Or when to say nothing, and just let her sit with you.

The day she blew up at you, after defeating Gortash - you'd handled it better than she could've hoped. You were comforting, and kind, and let her feel it out without making her feel bad. With you, she felt hopeful despite knowing that the end was probably going to come for her eventually.

With you, she thinks she could endure even the end of the world.

You're in the city now, no longer sleeping in the woods. When everyone else has gone to bed, Karlach finds you in the study, a room attached to the main living quarters.

She knocks before entering. Your voice is soft as you tell her to come in. Dressed in your comfy night clothes, your hair damp from washing up. You're bent over the desk with a furrow in your brow that Karlach finds sweet.

"Hey, baby," She asks, her heart thumping soft "Hope I'm not disturbin' your research."

"Of course not," You reply back, encouraging her towards you "I'm actually due a break."

Wordlessly, you sit up from your chair, pointing for Karlach to sit. She follows through, a little confused as to what you're doing before you plop yourself back into her lap. She throws her head back in laughter.

"Don't know what I was expecting there," She giggles, arm curling around your waist "All cozy?"

"Mm," You melt yourself into her embrace, turning to look at her. Your eyes are soft, free hand cupping her face "I'm cozy. What's keeping you up, pretty girl?"

The words catch her off guard completely, her engine flaring from the heat.

"Shit, what's with that?" She glances down at you, smiling like the cheeky fucker you are "I can't get any redder, you know? It's making my engine burn."

"You like it, no?" Your voice is smooth, smug in a way that gets her hot "My pretty girl,"

Karlach stares at you as you say it. Traces the curve of your lips, the slight arch of your brow. Asses the weight and warmth of you as you lay your legs over her lap and feels her body start to react. She didn't think it was possible to feel so complete by someone, even among the impending doom at the end of the world.

With you it fades away to nothing. Permission to want freely, she had no idea she had wanted that so bad. She had no idea she could want more when you'd already given her so much.

It's nice to be greedy. A little greed is fine, after everything.

"If you keep talking to me like that, we're going to do a lot more than just sitting, you know?" She tells you seriously.

You smile and laugh but don't deny her "Only if you say please,"

❈ LAE'ZEL ;

The Githyanki do not fall in love.

It's a fact of the culture, a mark of their honor. Love is for the soft, tender fleshed species of the material planes. It does not suit warriors, not the ruthless githyanki who spend their entire lives training the sword and learning magic. Love had always been a flimsy concept to Lae'zel. To the point she'd never thought about it or cared too. For the gith, there is only pleasure and carnal desire. The foolishness of longing can only be harbored in the lesser existence of the outer-world. The world outside of her creche.

For a long time, this was true for Lae'zel. She had never intended her time in the material plane to weaken her in the ways in which it did. Or that the experience of a ghaik parasite trapped behind her eyes would will her into cooperation with lesser beings. In many ways egregious, unfathomable. In trying to rid herself of one parasite, she'd found herself another one - more intolerable and more consuming than the first.

You. What a foreign and remarkable bond. From the beginning she had told you the truth, that the gith do not love and she would not be able to love you. Though she could admit passion, admit admiration for your courage, admit possession - she could not admit love. She knew nothing of it.

Over the course of your journey, you'd managed to prove her wrong. Slowly stripped bare of the identity she'd made her life around, you stripped Lae'zel down to her soul. Her most honored solider, and most formidable ally. When the time came, you'd told her to do what she must, to liberate her people. That you'd be there when she returned.

That you'd wait for her.

Months apart with few visits in between meant that each time Lae'zel sees you must make every minute count. Enjoying your body and indulging in carnal pleasures is only so much of that. What Lae'zel looks forward too most, she must admit, is the gentleness of your touch whenever she comes back to Fae'run.

Soft warm whispers among the indulgent plush of bed sheets and candles. A room that smells like lavender and oak, prayer books and scripture littered on the desk. A cleric of Bahamut, and a soul strong as steel.

But this, her head resting in your lap as you stroke her hair so carefully, is what she's missed most of all. No doubt she's going soft.

"Chk. You are smitten by the text in front of you as if you have forgotten of my return,"

You look down at Lae-zel with a laugh, carefully placing said book down on the bedside table. The voice you speak with her is different from her own. Tender fleshed even in your speech, you let her curl herself into you.

A vulnerable position, open to whatever may come.

"I'm sorry, pretty girl," You hum. The words practically startle her "I don't mean to neglect you. It was an interesting passage."

"Pretty...It is true among the githyanki, I am among the finest of their ranks," She replies, turning herself towards you - getting comfortable "Yet still, something stirs."

"Are you embarrassed?" You reply, delighted as her frown deepens. Before she has a chance to argue with you, you lean down to press your lips against hers briefly "How sweet of you."

"I do not get embarrassed," She insists, scowling as you begin to giggle at her "It was merely unexpected."

"You're beautiful to me, Lae'zel." You hum, stroking her cheek gently as she continues to lay herself across. Your eyes are tender and lidded. That look of obsession she recalled from the months prior returned in full, and no longer hidden. Unlike your other mortal companions, or the pale elf - there is nothing hidden in your words. No agenda "More beautiful than anyone else. At least to me. Getting to look at you so closely is a gift."

She softens, her hand gripping yours resting on her chest

"When it is over," She says seriously, a solemness to her voice "I will return to you. This I swear. Without you, the liberation of my people would be no less then a dream,"

You return her smile in kind.

"My pretty, wonderful girl," You hum. She loves you. She thinks she understands it now "I know you'll return to me, nailo. You always keep your promises."

"Yes," She says, an unfamiliar emotion overwhelming her "I will not forsake all we have promised."

The affection in your voice shakes Lae'zel to her core. Initial abrasion fades only into warmth. It's not so bad to hear, even if it is tender fleshed.

▸ a/n ; the word reader uses for lae'zel is elvish for swift winds!! reader is meant to be sort of a book worm so you do not need to picture them as a elf and more of a linguist.

this is the most substantial thing i've written in the last few weeks so commentary is very appreciated. i'd be willing to do a minthara and halsin addition to this eventually if anyone is interested!!

anyways, baldurs gate companions i love u. reblogs so appreciated !

[puranami]

✿ Fever - 1 ✿

A/N: Not included Brook and Jimbei bc I have absolutely no idea how to write them. Also, since Chopper is baby it would feel weird including him, even though it'd be in a purely platonic way. Just because of all the pining going on. Idk, I'd rather keep the themes separate, if that makes sense?

Summary: You're sick and try to ignore it.

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Robin, Franky.

Content: SFW, G/N reader, no serious illness but Usopp's is a liiiiittle angsty bc of his mum, not proofread (effectively) bc it's past 2am ✿

(Part 2)

Luffy

✿ He's honestly oblivious to things at first. You are doing your best to maintain your usual level of enthusiasm but it's so exhausting, and that's the most he registers - that you're tired.

"Hey, did ya not sleep too good?" he asked, entirely too loud for the headache beginning to form. You groan and lean your head into your hand, as if that would somehow soothe things, but to no avail. "Don't worry about it, I swear it won't affect my duties," you say, not sure who you were trying to convince. Apparently it didn't work regardless, as when you looked at him he was just stood there frowning with his arms crossed, and his head tilted. Before you could say anything you were greeted with a rubbery palm lightly smacking against your forehead, earning a surprised yelp from you. "You're hot." "Luffy!" Of course he had to say it that way. If you weren't already burning up with this fever, that would've set your skin ablaze. He really had no filter, and he never realised how the things he said affected you. He removed his hand from your face to grab your own, turning to drag you back to your quarters, not listening to any of your protests on the matter. There really wasn't anything you could do once Luffy had made up his mind, and you'd be lying if you said it wasn't part of his charm. "No duties for you today, 'kay?" It may have been phrased like a question, but you knew it was 'Captain's orders.'

✿ You'd end up sleeping most of the day, with Luffy having gotten Chopper to look after you.

✿What you wouldn't be aware of was his constant presence while you slept, keeping a quiet vigil whilst he made sure the damp cloth on your head was always nice and cool.

✿ He just wants you to get better as fast as you can!

Zoro

✿ One word; clueless.

✿ It just looks like a hangover to him, what with the way you groan at the light, are unsteady on your feet, and complain about being nauseous.

"And I thought I drank a lot last night." he'd comment with a smirk. "Shut up, Zoro, you always drink a lot," you whine. "I didn't drink anything!" "The pathetic whining says otherwise." You threw the rag you'd been cleaning with at him. He raised an eyebrow, watching it harmlessly drop to the floor in front of him. "Your form is off." This man, you swear! You try to growl out an insult, but it dies on your tongue, a wave of nausea hitting in it's place, causing you to clasp a hand to your mouth. "Alright, easy champ, no need to strain yourself," Zoro raised his hands in faux surrender. "Come on, you gotta sleep this one off." He can't help but smile as you pathetically smack at him while he picks you up, opting for bridal style as opposed to flour sack, only so you don't empty your guts down his back. Saying that, he'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy holding you like that, though you're far too busy trying to fight him to notice the dusting of pink on his cheeks. "Don't worry I'll get you through this. I know my way around a hangover." "I'm not hungover," you protest as he gently places you in a hammock.

✿ True to his word though, he does see you through it, even if 'it' is the wrong thing. Task failed successfully!

✿ Zoro stays beside you, makes sure you drink plenty of water, and get plenty of rest, even falling asleep himself at one point; his face inches from yours as he was leaning against the post the top end of the hammock was attached to at the time.

✿ Sadly you never saw that as you slept right through it. Would've been good ammunition to use against him when he needed taking down a peg.

Nami

✿ One of the people who would actually do a good job of looking after you. She's not got the gentlest bedside manner; she is firm yet fair, so you're in good hands.

When you don't join the crew for breakfast, Nami took it upon herself to make sure you hadn't gotten tangled in your hammock, or something equally as stupid. You wake up in a cold sweat when you hear your door open, and manage to croak out, "Nami? Oh, did I oversleep?" When you try to get up, she pushes you right back down. "Don't." Her tone indicates that she will not tolerate any shenanigans, and so you do as you're told. "You need to sleep more. I'll get you some water, and later Sanji will make you some soup." She tucks a thin blanket around you, so you don't overheat. "If you so much as try to get out of this hammock I'm going to tie your arms and legs together. Understood?" Unable to stop yourself, you let out a light chuckle. "Nami, you're so cute when you pretend not to care," the fever disabling any kind of filter you may have had. While it did catch her by surprise, you are none the wiser, as you quickly drift back off to sleep. Nami has to take a brief moment to collect herself again, silently cursing the noticeable warmth in her cheeks, then mumbling about how you're an idiot before leaving your room.

✿ Nami basically dictates how your day is. Lots of sleep, plenty of fluids and maybe a warm bath to help sweat this out, and of course she 'requests' (demands) Sanji make a hearty soup to help you get better, which he is more than happy to do for her!

✿ She'll deny it, but she sets up in your room so she can monitor you throughout the day, only going to Chopper for medicine if she thinks it's bad enough, deciding it isn't necessary to bother him with something so manageable.

Usopp

✿ He panics. Something about seeing someone he cares about getting sick makes him think of his mother, and he doesn't want to lose anyone else like that.

Usopp scoops you up and books it to Chopper. You've seen him afraid, but nothing this intense, and no matter how much you try to convince him that you're okay, and that it's just a cold - you can't seem to break through to him. "Chopper, please help! Please!" He begs as he gently places you on a bed. Tears are streaming down his face, as he takes your hand in a vice-like grip. Once Chopper confirms what you already tried to tell him about it being a common cold, he relaxes a bit. You don't hold it against him, clearly this is something deeper for him. Chopper's words, those of a professional, were very reassuring. "You just need rest, but I do have medicine to help with symptoms if you need," he says before putting a comforting little hoof on Usopp's knee. "Everything will be okay, I promise." Usopp takes a moment to collect himself before quietly saying, "Can I stay?" You and Chopper look at each other before smiling back at him, letting him know he is welcome to stay as long as he likes, or in this case needs. Neither of you press him on why this had him so scared, figuring he'll tell you if and when he's ready to.

✿ Chopper will handle all of your care, because Usopp refuses to leave your side.

✿ He keeps you entertained with his stories when you're awake, and scribbles on some loose papers Chopper gives him while you sleep. It's mainly ideas for things to make, and it keeps him calm.

✿ At one point he falls asleep with his arms crossed on the bed beside you, his little fingers linked with your own, like an unspoken promise that you'll get better, and he'll be there when you do.

Sanji

✿ As soon as Sanji catches on that you are sick, he decides to completely dedicate himself to your care and recovery! He's very attentive, and will do every little thing you want or need to get you back to health.

"Darling, I insist!" Every 'it's okay,' and 'you don't need to do all that for me,' will be shot down immediately. "What kind of man would I be if I let someone as lovely as you do anything in this condition?" He clutches his chest dramatically. "No, no. Don't you worry about a thing; I'll make sure you're well again in no time at all." You really don't have the energy to try and dissuade him, so you accept your fate, and let him dote on you the whole day. It's honestly really nice; you love having his attention, and are thankful that the fever hides your blushes, but you also can't help feeling a little guilty with how much he does for you. "Please don't overexert yourself on my behalf, I don't want you to end up getting sick yourself." "Even if I was sick, it wouldn't stop me from looking after you, my dear." You can't help but frown at this. He's so eager to do for others, but is painfully stubborn about receiving that same care. "If you're ever sick, Sanji, I'm gonna do everything that you've done for me - and I won't hear any objection from you on the matter!" You say in as stern a voice as you can manage with a sore throat. "Darling-" "Nope!" You cut him off quickly, "You deserve the same level of care that you give out!" He looks at you a little wide-eyed, an adorable blush creeping along his face. He lets out a small laugh. As much as he'd like to, he says nothing more on it; you're as stubborn as he is it would seem.

✿ Sanji makes lots of lovely food to help aid in your recovery; warming soups, peppermint tea, porridge with ginger and honey. Everything that soothes and settles, no matter the malady.

✿ His bedside manner is impeccable! He's so gentle with you, and he makes sure to check in as often as he can, whilst still doing his duties, getting as much done as possible while you're asleep.

✿ Like Nami, he only goes to Chopper if he feels your condition requires it. He's confident that his cooking will be more than enough to get you back to health.

Robin

✿ A blessing, and a curse. She's very logical, and she knows how to handle such a minor illness, but, she really can't help telling you all about other illnesses that have worryingly similar symptoms.

"Oh, this one is very unpleasant," she beams, and you can't help but press your hands over your ears. "Chopper!" You cry, before she can start telling you about this particular strain of 'instantdeathitus,' practically running into the infirmary with Robin hot on your heels, holding an open book on diseases. "Robin keeps talking about scary diseases and now I'm scared I'm gonna die!" After being given a quick check-up, and much reassurance that, no, you do not have a rare disease that can only be contracted on a specific island in a completely different ocean, and yes, it is just a common cold, you relax. Mostly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Robin says later once you have bundled up and settled down. "Your cold just reminded me of this book, and I thought it was fascinating. I just wanted to share it with you." She clearly felt guilty, and you appreciated that this was just how she is, but you really would've rather she'd chosen a different topic to tell you about. "Maybe, you have a book on old remedies you could tell me about instead?" Robin perks back up at this. She truly values how much you understand her, and she can see why talking about diseases when your ill is not the most pleasant experience, so this is a perfect compromise. "That's a wonderful idea," she smiles, and you swear she puts the sun to shame with how bright her smile is. "There might be one we can try that will help with your recovery."

✿ Once you get past the scary disease hiccup, Robin is a great companion, looking up home remedies, and trying out the ones that are clearly based on logic as opposed to superstition.

✿ If you find a good remedy, she's excitedly write it down, and later pass the information on to Chopper.

✿ She's happy to get you water when needed, and will watch over you as you nap in the library. It's one of the quietest parts of the ship, so there is no way to disturb you there.

Franky

✿ Aside from Chopper, Franky is genuinely the best at dealing with sick people. He tones down his behaviour, and knows exactly what you need to get back on your feet.

Your head was absolutely thundering, at least that's how it felt. Franky clocked onto your condition as soon as he saw you enter the kitchen, and once you had what you came in for, he hurried you off to his workshop. You thought it was an odd choice. "Shouldn't I go somewhere quiet?" "I know it doesn't seem it, but I can keep this place absolutely silent if I need to. No music, no one else barging in and making a racket," he said, keeping his voice uncharacteristically quiet. "Also the walls are soundproof - keeps noise out just as well as it keeps my noise in." "Oh! That's really impressive," even when ill, there is a sparkle in your eyes when he tells you about pretty much anything he's designed or built. You notice his cheeks turning red, but assume that it's just from the compliment as he looked so proud when you gave it to him. "That's not all," he grins, "I've been working on a lil something, and now's the perfect time to show you!" That certainly piqued your interest, and he was doing a great job at distracting you from how bad you felt. Franky led you to one of the corners of the room, one that was covered in a large tarp. You'd seen it many times, and you were always curious, but he'd always brushed it off whenever you brought it up, so the thought of finally seeing what was under there was exciting! Pulling down the tarp revealed a little alcove that was almost like a nest considering the amount of cushions. "It's a space for you," he said sheepishly, "so you have somewhere comfortable to sit when you hang out in here. I figured you could rest there whilst you're ill, and I can look out for you." You stared at it in absolute wonder, big shining eyes darting between it and him. "It's absolutely perfect, thank you so much!"

✿ Franky kept the workshop quiet like he said he would, and whenever you needed anything, like water or medicine, he'd go and get it for you.

✿ At some point Chopper came in to check on you, since Franky had mentioned you were ill, but there really wasn't much to do about it besides getting lots of rest, and you had that covered.

✿ He'd work on his quiet projects, the ones still in the planning and design stages, whilst you slept peacefully in your cosy nest.

[rayroseu]

"you are just as guilty" ⚔️🥀

last cough of art before the update ahkdhkshsksh AAAAAAAAAAA i dont wanna leave Briar Valley yet 😩😩😩😩 Lilia don't gatekeep all the lore,,, dang it,,,💔💔💔💔

sometimes i really do wonder what Meleanor or Dawn's last thoughts before dying..... ESPECIALLY Dawn... Bro rarely has the chances to express his individuality, he's so tragic to be with the Silver Owls sm.. 😭who suppresses all opinions as seen with their soldier garments (all of them basically have the same motifs and design) in contrast,.. Meleanor's army has differently designed mask to highlight the unique faes they are--

I have this thought that like Silver, he cries about the sins of his nation as well... 😭I think he has regrets that he made Meleanor overblot and blames himself for it 😭 (Like how Silver was the last straw to make Malleus overblot-)

I think its a common interpretation that Dawn is heroic, but I don't think of him that way KSJSKS, not because he's not a hero, but because he's a failed one. In the story, it felt like he was "just a person". He's not perfect, he's flawed.

And, I think the existence of "failed heroes" like Dawn is really intriguing in TWST,,,, because the heroic characters here are depicted as "never failing at anything". Like how RSA characters are. They never lose at anything, but ironically the character most inspired by this school (RSA) failed at "being a good hero."

I'm interpreting he failed because he couldn't make his mission come true; peace between fae and humans, in fact he might have worsened it with the passing of Meleanor 😭😭💔💔

The most tragic thing of all his life, was probably the part where he died, not because of the faes, but of his own fellow countrymen... I imagine in this image, what did he even kill Meleanor for? He couldn't make any peace between faes and humans, he couldn't save his country, we're not even sure if he did use Meleanor's magical stone to save the Human King and if he was successful with it, so if he has failed at everything he aspired to achieve, then what else is the point to all the bloodshed he has faced and committed?

In a way, his "punishment" is similar to Rollo's, celebrated by the achievement he didn't want to commit (except its the good guy this time adskjs)

(Thats why I'm sold at the idea of Dawn just giving up fighting at his death bcs theres no way if he did actually had the motivation to fight, he'd lose against fellow humans when he fought Meleanor on solo akhdkhs... unless they reveal how he died as well next update---🙏🏻✨😳/copium)

In a way, its similar to Silver's disappointment too, that he worked all his life to make Lilia proud, to make sure that faes like his Father can be understood better, only for Lilia to leave him all alone yk... 🥹

But on the other side, I don't think he failed too much... because of his losses, Silver was brought to Lilia 🥹🥹

I feel like Lilia will relate to Dawn as well,,, He said in the story that he sympathized with Dawn because he spared tamago Malleus, but I beg to differ.

I think its actually because like Dawn, Lilia is also a knight who failed at everything he aspired to commit to (he took so long to hatch the egg and he failed to protect Meleanor and keep his promise with Levan that he'll take care of his wife and son-) so at that realization, Lilia probably sees that there's no reason to hate him, they had the same fate, so why would he hate his child as well?

He's not living anymore but I think Lilia could see that Dawn probably awaited for centuries to wake his son up from sleep,,, like how Lilia desperately waited and wished that something would hatch Malleus already 😭😭💔💔

JUST... KNIGHT OF DAWN I'LL REMEMBER YOU FOREVER SKDJSK 😭😭😭😭🫂🫂🫂

[lucysarah-c]

Hello, I’m the bad Oc anon. I get it but she doesnt have the cheeky femme fatal attitude she’s just a shallow cold bitch for no reason. Like in transactional i was excited to read but she’s so rude in her head to Levi often it makes her really unlikable. I wanted to say it not bc I wanna be a bitch to you, but bc your stories are good but your ocs ruin most of it.How you wrote her in the flirting skills is even worse. 

Hello!

I understand if you don't like the MCs, as I mentioned in your first ask. It's alright—not all MCs are for everyone, but while you may not like them, others do.

I don't intend to drag this out more than necessary, but I will explain a bit. The MC in "Transactional" is mean to Levi in her head because she's not in love with him; she doesn't know him, she's not even a scout—she's an MP—and Levi isn't known for being a ray of sunshine in general, especially not to MPs. Not all main characters are going to be madly in love with Levi for no apparent reason. I'm not saying it's bad to write MCs who are in love with Levi; it's just that in the particular fics you chose, the MC isn't in love with him. The MC in "Transactional" isn't even interested in Levi—the joke of the fic is that (as the title implies) it's a mere transaction. She doesn't love him, and he doesn't love her. He has something she wants, and she offers herself for the promotion... Nobody in that fic is in love; it's not about love, it's a plain smut fic.

Furthermore, she keeps repeating in her mind that she's "expecting" Levi to behave in a certain way because that's her perception of him, and he turns out to do the opposite. This indicates that she clearly has no idea who Levi Ackerman actually is. The joke of the fic is that dynamic—the lack of feelings, her expectations, and what actually happens.

The same goes for Levi's horrible flirting skills. The MC is not in love with Levi for most of the fic; she doesn't know him, they barely talk, and she has other boys who are into her. To her, he's just Erwin's Captain. Not every girl inside the walls is deeply in love with Levi—that's the joke of the fic: him trying to make her fall in love and failing. I do have fics where the reader is in love with Levi from the start, etc., but these two in particular aren't like that. I understand if it's not a dynamic you enjoy.

Some fics do well here (Tumblr) and not on Ao3, and some do well on Ao3 but not here. The audience is different; I've even considered that there are writers better suited for Ao3 and writers for Tumblr. "Holy Ground" doesn't do well here but does there, and "Not in Season?" wasn't much of a success here but did well there. I'm not saying "Transactional" is a masterpiece—it was just an idea I had that I wanted to write. What did I want to write? An MC who needs a promotion and sleeps with Levi in exchange for it.

There's no feelings, there's no love—just plain "transaction."

I hope this helps, and if you still don't like them, which you're free to do, perhaps those are not the stories for you, or maybe none of my stories are. I don't expect to write things that please everyone. I write what I feel like, what I like, and what I want, because I don't see a single penny out of this.

Have a nice day.

[escapingdestiny101]

I am fully in the Polin trenches so this is probably just the ramblings of someone who enjoys meta a little too much BUT-

In the Eros and Psyche comparison, Colin and Penelope both play both roles. Hear me out:

I took Latin Prose in undergrad and we had to translate Eros and Psyche. Here's a quick and dirty summary of what I remember from Apuleius's version of the story in Metamorphoses: Psyche herself doesn't offend Aphrodite but her parents and the people of her town keep saying she's more beautiful than Aphrodite. Her sisters are jealous of her. She's so pretty that people stop going to Aphrodite's temples and start worshiping Psyche instead. Psyche never asked for this; even though everyone thinks she's beautiful and worships/desires her, Psyche feels nothing for them and knows they don't truly love her either. Aphrodite gets offended of course so to appease the goddess, Psyche is thrown off a cliff and, assuming she survives, has to marry a monster.

Aphrodite enlists her son Eros to help with this plan. Eros sees Psyche and falls in love with her too, so when the townspeople throw Psyche off the cliff, she's caught by Zephyrus and whisked away to Eros' home. Eros only interacts with Psyche in the dark; she never sees him or learns his name, she just assumes he's the beast that the goddess declared she'd marry. Psyche is sad and lonely not being able to see her husband bc even though he's a monster, he treats her really well and she does like him. She's so lonely that she asks her husband if her sisters can visit. He thinks this is a terrible idea but agrees as long as Psyche promises not to be influenced by them. Psyche of course fails to heed that warning, her sisters mock her for not seeing her husband, and for having to fuck her monster husband in the dark bc if they turned the lights on she'd probably die of fright.

So Psyche, with this new brainworm thanks to her terrible sisters, decides to wait until her husband falls asleep to light a candle (or oil lamp) to see exactly what she's been sleeping with. If it's a monster, she'll kill him. Turns out it's the most handsome man in the world, she recognizes him as Eros and falls to her knees. As she does, a drop of hot oil from her light hits Eros on the back. Eros wakes immediately, sees the light, and flies away. His last words are that love cannot live without trust.

Psyche then goes to Aphrodite and asks her to intercede with her son. Aphrodite, who still hates Psyche, agrees to let Psyche undergo three trials to prove herself worthy of Eros. Obviously, Aphrodite isn't being fair and intends to use the trials to punish her daughter-in-law. Psyche succeeds in the first two trials with the help of animals, ants and an eagle. The last trial involves going into the underworld to ask Persephone to put some of her beauty in a box. Psyche succeeds without a hitch (katabasis) and Aphrodite is furious.

The other gods step in at this point. Hermes tells Eros what his mom was doing to his wife and he's super touched that Psyche would do all that for him. Eros and Psyche get married and Zeus grants Psyche immortality as a wedding present.

So what does this have to do with Colin and Penelope?

The obvious comparisons are that Colin, with his charm, good looks, and social standing, is Eros and that Penelope, with her terrible family and bleak prospects, is Psyche. If we look a little closer though, we can flip things.

Colin, like Psyche, has people flocking to him. Ladies want his attention, to be charmed by him. Gentlemen want his stories and his presence in their "revelry." Despite this, he doesn't really feel connected to these people. It's a facade that he's learned to put up. We learn in his journal that he desires a greater emotional connection with a lover specifically but I'd argue with other relationships in his life as well. Colin's siblings are not like Psyche's terrible sisters, BUT another thing Psyche's sisters were known for was that they both married kings. They married well. Daphne and Anthony also, famously, married well. Colin is described by Violet as the most sensitive of the Bridgerton children, always willing to put others above himself. Dutiful, one might say. Dutiful like Psyche, who agreed to marry a monster because the gods willed it and underwent Aphrodite's trials without complaint.

Penelope, nearly a spinster and nearly on the shelf, who does not fit the ideal body type of the ton, is certainly treated as though she's monstrous. Cressida and Penelope entered society at the same time, but no one shames Cressida for seeking a husband in her third season. We, the audience, know that Penelope isn't a monster just as Zephyrus knew that Eros wasn't a monster. Penelope's mother is definitely as shrewd and vindictive as Aphrodite. And Penelope also has an identity she wishes to keep secret.

I've seen some analysis of the candle going out before Colin heads to the ball to stop the proposal, linking it to a small spark of love that always existed and was just starting to turn into a flame. But here's the thing, the candle goes out. It doesn't flicker and come back. It does start small and get bigger. It shrinks and dies. I would argue that this is representing two things. One, Colin's fear that he is out of time and that Penelope will accept Lord Debley's proposal. He's run out of time, hope is extinguished, so what does he have to lose? Which brings us to point two: the dark represents trust in the Eros and Psyche myth. With the candle out, all Colin can do is trust his mother's advice and trust in his feelings for Penelope.

BUT BUT BUT we are only halfway through the season, and we the audience know that a rather important detail still needs to be revealed!!!

Here's where we get into my speculations for the last four episodes. I think Penelope and Colin's roles will begin to flip again. Like Psyche's sisters sowed discord in her marriage, I think that Eloise (either intentionally or unintentionally) will be a catalyst for Colin finding out that Penelope is Lady Whistledown. I don't think Eloise will tell him directly, but she'll definitely be involved. That's when Penelope will become Psyche again and have to complete trials to prove herself to Colin. Love cannot exist without trust, after all.

I hope Lady Danbury offers a bounty on the identity of Lady Whistledown like she does in the book. Lady Danbury being analogous to Persephone would be fitting in my opinion. Although the Queen could also fill this role. The ants and the eagle could represent the lowly and the great; Penelope could accept assistance from someone of low and someone of high status. For the low, I would guess her maid (though she makes a better Zephyrus) or maybe the modiste. For the high, another Bridgerton or maybe even Cressida.

Katabasis is a hero's journey to the underworld, when a living person enters the realm of the dead on a quest and returns to the land of the living. Psyche is granted godhood after her success. I think Penelope will have to endure something equally arduous, but her reward will match as well. It would be satisfying for her to gain the ton's acceptance and even approval of her marriage to Colin, and I would especially like Lady Danbury to be involved with that (she's so much more involved in the book). I'm partial to Lady Danbury, but if it's the Queen instead her opinion would go a lot farther in shifting the opinion of the ton in Penelope's favor. That might be appropriate though far-fetched given the games between the Queen and Lady Whistledown.

The only role I have little speculation for is that of Aphrodite. I can't imagine Violet putting Penelope through a gauntlet even after finding out about her secret. It would fit Portia's character, but even she wouldn't do anything to jeopardize her daughter's marriage to a Bridgerton.

I just re-watched the trailer before hitting post and noticed that in the trailer, the candle does indeed glow brighter rather than going out. I wonder how many more misdirections are in the trailer, like Colin kissing that other girl's hand or him alone in the hired hack. I could be entirely wrong about everything of course, I'm just very excited to see where the second half of the season goes!

[mixelation]

Do you have any headcanons specifically for minato in his dilf era (anytime after naruto)

sure:

minato brings baby naruto into the office with him a LOT. this is because: if kushina lives in the AU, i can't see her wanting to take off a lot of time from her own work. if she DOESN'T live in the au, it's because he feels weird about hiring a babysitter like he's replacing her or something. in both cases he also just likes hanging out with naruto

imagine you come in to hand in a report and the hokage just has a sleeping baby against his chest

this is like catnip to a lot of people bc hello?? handsome man good with children?? we would like five. everyone was aware he's pretty but now there's a whole NEW demographic of people who are like 5x hornier for him

is SO ready to show you photos of his wife and baby. had to remove a family photo on his desk because he kept feeling tempted to do it at WILDLY inappropriate times. (maybe keeps it in a drawer so he can put it out when he's working long hours?)

naruto gets less office time once he's old enough he might start ummm remembering Things

i was toying with the idea of minato randomly pulling naruto out of class sometimes. like i think he'd try VERY hard to make time for his family even with his high pressure job, but he'd fail sometimes, so it tuns into this half-manic "okay naruto i told you a month ago i'd show you a beach and I HAVE FORTY FIVE MINUTES FREE RIGHT NOW, NO I DON'T CARE YOU WERE LEARNING MATH, YOU CAN LEARN MATH TOMORROW, DON'T TELL YOUR MOTHER" and naruto is DEVASTATED by getting weird rando uncool privileges so he's like "DAD NO" even though the beach was pretty cool. now he has to organize skipping class with some other kids to regain his cool point smh

minato and kushina are still disgustingly in love decades into their marriage. would this stop anyone from lusting after the DILFkage? no. does kushina care? no, obviously not, she already won :)

the RPF community fucking loves minato. they write him SO cool. he gets even hotter with age, AND you can write him as a caring familyman OR a dangerous hot smirking guy, so the appeal is broad

[dairy-farmer]

Sorry if you've already touched on this, but what are your thoughts about the discourse/discussion about Tim in the comics and Tim from the lens of A03/fan fiction?

For example, I hear a lot from old comic fans about how the series with Tim dating Bernard was doomed to fail bc 'the writer wrote him like her fanfiction version of Tim and not the real character'. There was a lot of discourse with canonical announcing Tim as queer, and that's kinda all these older comic book fans seem to keep coming back to. Idk, there just kinda seems to be an underlying feeling of misogyny towards the female writers and anti lgtbq vibes that it's hard to hear like a real arguement against the series.

I guess as a long time a03/Fandom person, I'm so used to just creating another little reality for the things I disagree or want to explore with a character, that it's strange to see people so upset that Canon doesn't flow the way the want.

it's no problem!! and i haven't really touched on the newer comics all that much mostly because i also don't particularly like them, not for any specific reason-they're decent enough but i don't really think they're 'tim'-but i do know what you're talking about. on twitter and tumblr i see a lot of different takes regarding tim and how he's written in this newer robin series.

for starters: i get what you're talking about where criticism of the comics might partly because of anti-lgbt attitude. especially since tim getting confirmed to be bisexual made A LOT of people mad (including ppl who arent homophobic but are mad that it wasn't THEIR favorite robin who got confirmed queer like dick, jason, or damian etc). comic bros and even casual comic fans who had never even heard of tim or even gave a shit about him were now furious. and while there might be ppl with genuine critiques- some of hatred of the way tim is written in the newer comics you really have to take it with a grain of salt because it very well could be comic bros hating because "robin isn't gay".

same with the writer, meghan fitzmartin. in general, women DO have an uphill battle when it comes to working in comics because it is very male dominated. and it's no secret that a lot of comic fans are opposed to women writing in comics. so misogyny, and even jealousy also plays a role with how much criticism is ACTUALLY warranted. but that doesn't mean a woman in comics isn't allowed to be criticized if they do a bad job or do a botched execution when their job is supposed to be making good, enjoyable, stories that do justice to the characters. i do think meghan may have some decentish ideas but whether she genuinely has the writing chops to deliver on those big ideas is well...iffy. but then again i genuinely don't keep tabs on comic writers or they're projects so maybe that will change.

when it comes to the critique of tim being written like a "fanfiction" version and not a "real" version of him i do see what they mean.

when I think of fanon tim I think of all the mischaracterizations that have been popularized. a coffee obsessed gremlin that doesn't sleep who is deeply insecure and agonizes over his place in the family, thinking he doesn't belong. people LIKE that tim is portrayed like that (in fanfiction) otherwise that characterization wouldn't be so pervasive in fics (there's also the possibility that a lot of ff writers DON'T know any better because many don't read comics but they do read fics and so they base their portrayals solely off what they read in fics resulting in this racoon eyed, coffee loving character who they believe to be an actual portrayal when it's really just someone's idea/exaggerated interpretation of tim).

i really don't see a lot of that in meghan's writing, the issues with tim's writing with her are different. if anything WFA is the one that really have the 'written as a ff character' vibe. but that series is also SUPPOSED to be deeply unserious as a fun slice of life universe where nothing goes wrong for anyone ever as a soothing balm for the oftentimes depressing stories in batman comics.

but in meghan's writing I also don't see a lot of what i consider to be core tim values. is she the best writer for tim? no i don't really think so. but there is a certain degree of understanding for his character. I see the comics and I can recognize that it's tim. so it's not offensively OC.

a lot of complaints seem to stem from his relationship with bernard being too much of a focus. people say how tim does too much thinking about him when...he was a lot worse in the 90s with steph. I remember getting so irritated when entire comics of robin would be narrated by steph or about her, i'd be like 'I want to read about ROBIN and his adventures, not steph, why is she even relevant?'. but tim's relationships to other people are a core part about him so you just have to take it.

the part that i think is justified in critique is in talking about whether her writing of bernard dowd is good. that is a much easier thing to answer. and its that its not good writing. in fact it's a pretty bad, inaccurate portrayal of him given how he was written when we first knew him. he's sort of been...sanded down? kind of remade into some new, almost unrecognizable character that fits into what she believes would be a nice, wholesome, gay partner for tim. which is an issue for me because we have seen and know what tim is like in relationships. tim had tension with, disagreed with, got annoyed with, fought and argued with his other partners like stephanie and ariana. but he also enjoyed himself and was happy with them. there was a balance there of good and bad because tim's unique situation of being robin made it so there had to be good and bad. with bernard it's all very passive and easy. they don't argue, they don't really fight, or have any struggles in their relationship when trying determine compatibility. avoiding tension in the relationship when tim has a track record of it makes it almost seem like she's afraid of the risk of portraying a gay relationship in anything less than a golden light. which is not good writing. BUT it is also very NEW. so maybe that will change (but there's a similar problem with jon kent and his bf so idk)? i personally believe kon would've been a more ideal partner with their shared history, chemistry, tension, the fact that fans have wanted it for decades, and the fact that it would've been such a good addition to the arc of self acceptance for kon's character. and many of the issues that tim being with bernard wouldn't be a thing because tim and kon famously don't see eye to eye 100 percent of the time and so their relationship would struggle and grow as they go from friends to romantic partners.

ultimately in my opinion to write a truly good tim drake you need to be able to accurately portray the thing that made him such a great robin: his heart of gold. tim cares about doing the right thing SO much. he cares about helping people. he's not some cold, unfeeling calculated computer who uses people as pawns and abandons his morals at the slightest inconvenience or seduction to the 'dark side'. and he's not some coffee drinking hacker man that is 20 steps ahead and smug about it.

tim worries about people, he's upset at injustice, feels guilt at not being able to save people, is judgy, sometimes a brat, sarcastic, gets angry at people for throwing their lives away, gets very invested in things that catch his interest, is too curious for his own good, nosy. he lies through his teeth and then bats his eyes in sweet as pie innocence. will think VERY rude thoughts about people but will bite his tongue because he's a nice boy👼 but sometimes things slip out. he is somehow simultaneously able to be the 🥺 and 😈 emoji at the same time. his odds of making bad decisions increase by 100 fold if in the company of other stupid teenagers.

now i write tim as a very exaggerated version of that core self. that's what a lot of ff authors do. they choose a handful of traits they like best about him and spin entire fics about it. i don't think writing tim as a fanfiction version of himself is a bad thing because some fanfic is genuinely better than the source material and that comes from being very good at understanding the character. the tim of today can't be written the same way he was in his golden age, the 90s, because a lot of his struggles and hurdles that he dealt with in those comics are over. they're done. tim can't be 30 years old and still wondering if he's doing a shit job as robin. tim IS a good robin and he should be able to acknowledge that (funnily enough one of his clear acknowledgements of that is often wiped away by fics- that being the titans tower scene where jason asks if tim thinks he's the better robin and tim, without hesitation, says yes) a lot of older fans are clinging to problems that tim has already resolved. he's not thirteen and insecure about his abilities. he's not on his first relationship with someone (but he is in his first relationship with a boy). he's not still learning how to navigate his relationship with batman and the rest of the family or struggling to come to terms with his civilian and caped life. do some of those things still trouble him on occasion? yes but they're not the main focus anymore.

tim has to have new problems, new challenges, new growth.

i had some hope for new tim comics.

would i like to have seen more tim centric material or at least good stories. and often times in the new tim comics tim was exactly the same at the end of the issue as he was at the beginning. tim struggling with his identity is something that made an appearance in 90s comics a lot but I think for the newer ones that it would've been better received/more interesting if it were...written better?

idk. i don't know a single comic fan that loved every detail of their fav's comics. was it the best run? no. but it was okay enough i guess. it was lukewarm, not standing ovation worthy but also nobody should be throwing tomatoes at the performers either, it just earned a polite clap of acknowledgement which i don't think is a very bad thing but still i hope we get something better!

[lemonhemlock]

i keep seeing so many wildly different takes on the tomshiv fight so i'm gonna throw in my two cents. prefacing by saying that i do really think there is little point in trying to count how many blows one of them struck against the other bc ultimately this was a relationship that was dishonest and mismatched from the get-go. similarly, it's relatively pointless to argue over which character in this show is "more awful" than the other bc they're all arseholes, so i guess the best way for everyone to make a distinction is to just go by your personal benchmark of annoyance. people have different thresholds for what they consider annoying behaviour and rate social transgressions via an individual hierarchy. so, for some people, shiv's cheating might be a bigger infraction than tom's betrayal and so on. but these different reactions ultimately reflect the commentator's sensibilities; they are not meant to be reflective of a universal, immutable truth.

that being said, i personally am leaning more towards tom's side of the argument. he has just spent an entire evening witnessing his wife demean him repeatedly (not a solitary incident or a joke gone wrong) to his guests in his own house and hearing about how he's going to get fired (news to him). he's sleep-deprived and is going to have a very busy and long day tomorrow since it's election day. so he tries to extricate himself from the situation and simply go to bed. i generally see tom as a slimy corporate suck-up but this was really a very composed, civilized reaction. he repeatedly tries to pacify shiv and disengages but she keeps needling him bc she is suddenly regretting her own schemes. she complains that she's betraying her family for this as if it wasn't her idea in the first place - no one was forcing her to go through with it at any point. her plot was so half-baked that it turns out she threw her husband under the bus in front of their guests for nothing, as "a tactical joke". i mean?? i feel like tom is in the right to point out her hypocrisy and extreme privilege here.

so far i think that most people would agree with what i've said, but the thing that i think sets this apart a little is that this is classic shiv behaviour. she repeatedly disregards tom's feelings and situation and minimizes his problems in favour of her own. so tom being upset by her agreeing with the firing rumour is immediately brushed aside because the REAL problem here is that shiv's plot is gonna fail and she's gonna lose against ken and rome. which isn't actually a real problem anyway because she's going to be rich AF no matter what.

i will diverge now from the generally-accepted takes and say that tom pretty much clocks shiv's behaviour but, while she does spell out some truths about him, part of what she says are delusions and projections. tom does impart some hard-hitting truths like calling her broken, not a good person to have children or incapable of love. these things are not false and they are also not insults. i really don't get why so many are saying he is insulting shiv. these are observations based on her own (repeated) behaviour.

whereas she doesn't really respond in kind, i feel. shiv is the one who throws insults at him, calling him a hick and insulting his entire family by labeling them striving and parochial. these are also crouched in classism and made all the more ridiculous by the fact that tom's mother is a well-respected lawyer so "parochial" is truly a delusional word to use in this context, which goes to show how extreme shiv's billionaire privilege is. in return, tom doesn't insult her family and actually chooses the reasonable reply of "that's not a fair characterisation". the part about tom's mother loving shiv more is, again, complete fabrication. so is the part about TOM being the reason she didn't speak to her father for the last six months of his life. shiv is well within her rights to be upset tom revealed her plans to logan, but even if he hadn't, logan would have still been massively pissed at her and her brothers and they STILL would have been estranged.

again, maybe this is just me, but calling someone broken is not an insult, while calling some pathetic is? shiv goes on to tell him that she never loved him and doesn't even like him and he never even "deserved" her, which are hard to label as anything other than cruel. even during this fight tom still tells her that he loves her? idk, man, tom has so many flaws and he is a social climber and he did become prissy bc she kept postponing having children but it feels like shiv spends the majority of this fight accusing tom of things that are not true and calling him mean names

[meg2md]

My life, in two pictures:

Exhibit A, trying to get swole but only succeeding when the lighting is on point, and still failing at pull-ups by trying my damndest

Exhibit B, my re-ignited love of Naruto, as well as a new obsession with non-alcoholic beers

That being said, I did drink... way too much last night. I went to trivia and truly would have been okay with 1-2 beers, but then a friend came late and wanted a drink, and my other friend is going through a rough time and wanted to go back to my place and keep drinking... and truthfully at ANY POINT I would have been okay with an NA beer, and I know for next time that I shouldn't give in to peer pressure and keep drinking. I'm confident I wouldn't have kept drinking on my own (which used to be a problem in college and medical school - binge drinking!!) and that I can do better next time. So even though I was hungover today and felt a little bit ashamed, I was able to be there for my friend when she needed it, I still went to my tennis clinic, and I know next time I'll be able to intersperse more NA beers and overall drink less.

And honestly, overall the past few months I have been drinking DRASTICALLY less and it's been very good for my mental, physical, and emotional health. Go me. I'm very proud.

Despite it all I'm actually somewhat on top of things, even though I spent most of the morning sleeping in bc I stayed up until 2 AM with my friend drunkenly singing MCR and Evanescence, and then it took awhile after tennis for my hangover to go away and for me to feel awake enough after extreme physical exertion while slightly hungover to get anything done. But I mayyyyy have this abstract I've been working on ready to submit for SGS if all goes well, and I'm also hoping on to be a middle author on a project with one of my co-residents which will also get submitted to SGS! And I actually have two ORs I can go to next week to film this video idea I have - submissions for the conference I want are due 8/8 so it's pretty tight and stressful but doable. I'm just gonna be SUPER busy next week with video stuff, in the same way i was SUPER busy this week with the lit review/IRB prep for my other project.

I'm gonna go crash into oblivion. It's already been a week of my research block and me not needing to be at the hospital barely at all but I feel like it's gone by so fast since I've been relatively busy working on all the things above. I'm definitely not efficient - a more competent research-oriented resident could probably have done it in a fraction of the time. But hey, I'm at least being academically productive, AND I played tennis, AND I'm going to two concerts this month, AND I've been allotting video game time to the start of every morning I don't have to be at the hospital.

All in all I think it's actually worked out nicely that I didn't rush to get an away rotation together last minute. I have 3 projects to work on at home AND I get to do things I like around the the neighborhood like watch Naruto, play tennis, read, and go to the gym. And I saw a pic of my ex earlier and while I was a little sad and nostalgic, it didn't rip me up like it used to (yes it's been 1.5-2 years w/e I love swiftly and deeply lol), and it just further motivated me to kick ass and be super swole and hot and buff up my CV >:)

I'm gonna be p sad going back to real work when this block is over bc ngl it's p cush

[lookedlikethebins]

if it was you that made my body (preview!)

hey all! i've decided to give a little preview bc honestly i've been having a bit of a rough time recently and i'm trying to keep my Creative Gears turning so i don't find myself in a rut. so here we are! to be posted on my ao3 very soon (literally the moment the denouement cooperates lol).

basic summary: takes places during the months recording abiior in the residential studio; matty ruminating on his ideas of God and maybe being someone born without any holy supervision. [~900 words]

It was Matty’s turn to do the laundry. Part of him dreaded the return of the chore—how many clothes could four guys go through in just a week?—but another part of him liked the physicality of the task: using both arms to carry the clothes down the stairs to the washing machine; the repetitive back and forth of sorting the heap into the correct color-oriented piles; the extra heft when pulling the soaked clothes from the washer to take outside; the up and down from basket to clothesline; the focused grip of the plastic clothespins with his slightly damp hands, hoping it didn’t slip out from between his pinched fingers again; the echo of fabric, now wet and coarse, remaining on his palms as he walked back inside.

Once the weather tipped toward spring, Matty began putting their wash outside to dry. Climbing into bed Sunday night after all the beds had been remade and sleep shirts returned to their correct owners, it was a small pleasure to smell the slow, soothing breeze and lingering feeling of light and warmth of the day just passed. One last memory of another day alive and spent with the people Matty loved most.

Matty’s therapist, assigned to him as part of his discharge process, frequently advised Matty to search for such small, simple pleasures of life. Not the silver lining—which acknowledged a little too much that everything sucked and only a small outline was redeemable—but that there was a complete moment of beauty to be found in everything.

To Matty, the entire idea felt too much like his therapist was trying to describe the act of acknowledging divinity, of finding God in the mundane—just as He created it. Matty knew many sobriety programs leaned on the idea or shape of a higher power to which people could offer up their life (and, to him, the idea of autonomy). As if it was a comfort to believe Matty’s ability to remain clean was in the hands of something he occasionally humored the idea of believing in.

But while God couldn’t quite be a comfort to Matty, those simple pleasures and joys could be. Remembering each one created a sort of calendar; something easy to peer back on and balance out Matty’s habit of consistently remembering, without fail, when days were bad and when they were worse, and seemingly never when they were good. Even when they were just survived.

The day previous, Saturday: playing cards with Adam, but stopping after only playing a hand so he could teach Matty how to shuffle the deck like he was some sort of casino worker.

Friday: chopping vegetables for George when he volunteered to cook them dinner and realizing George actually knew how to julienne vegetables properly.

Thursday: Ross showing both concern and care when he knocked on the bathroom door to check on Matty in the bath. Matty had fallen asleep—his book now completely waterlogged—and had no idea it had almost been an hour. Ross hadn’t been upset with Matty, nor did he spread his worry to the other two guys, but he knocked loudly and firmly, asking Matty to please answer him. The real simple joy was Ross’s soft thank you and do you need a towel? once he heard Matty answer. He never asked him to open the door.

Wednesday: George, without a word and without being asked, getting up to make Matty a cup of tea in the middle of the night to try and soothe him after another nightmare of withdrawal. Of retching, coughing, shaking, and suffering at the hand of a body desperate for something Matty no longer wanted, no longer needed.

Tuesday: being asked if he wanted another jumper when he began trembling from a sudden drop in his body temperature—a byproduct of his change in metabolism and body weight—and Ross ignoring Matty’s decline and pulling his own to push over Matty’s head. Adam helping force Matty’s arms through the sleeves.

Monday: waking up to George’s hand gently resting on his stomach and head resting on Matty’s shoulder. Matty was still able to smell the whispers of the tall grass on his pillowcase beside the smell of George’s new rosemary shampoo.

From the clothesline, Matty could see the dining area through the large, square, single-paned window. To the right was a smaller, porthole-like window that hovered above the sink and currently framed Ross as he did the washing up. George was sitting at the dining table, leaning on both his elbows, and Adam was sitting in the chair opposite George but turned to face the kitchen.

All the windows were closed and Matty couldn’t hear them, but he knew the look of joy and comfort well enough on his friends’ faces to still be able to track the conversation.To know the way George’s shoulders shook with each choppy laugh, only growing louder—Ross or Adam continuing to riff and getting him to lean back in his chair or tip forward and fall to the side. To hear the steady bubble of Ross’s laughter that, with the warmth of his happiness, sometimes sounded like it was muffled orunderwater. To track the body language of his friends—across two windowpanes—and see the exhales of spent laughter and know that was the moment Adam was going to slip in another joke and get them going again.

Now, Matty had Sunday: observing joy from the outside and realizing it wasn’t as foreign to him as he once thought; Matty’s brain didn’t process it as a possibility of social torture or discomfort—or disappointment.

[wereh0gz]

More thoughts bc I can't sleep but this time it's abt the au fanfic my ocs are supposed to be a part of

It's become clear to me that at this rate it's just not gonna be written ever. Like it's gotten to the point where the more I try to write this thing the less I actually Want to write like. In general. Even though I do enjoy writing occasionally I just don't have the energy or writing skill to tackle a multi-chapter fanfic of this scale

I honestly just wanted this story that's been stuck in my head to be told but I couldn't think of another way to do it other than through a fanfic (and that ask blog thing i tried a couple years ago) and that's clearly not working out lmao. Both have failed miserably

So instead I'm just going to draw scenes from the story that I've had in my head for all these years, add a bit of context through the caption maybe, and move on with my life. Maybe one day I'll have the writing ability to turn it into an actual fic but if I keep trying to write it now it's just not going to get done Ever. I'm much better with visuals than I am with words anyways so like. I think I'll feel a lot better if I just get those scenes out, get that story out there in Some way, and just let go of the whole fanfic idea for now. No more stressing abt this shit just have fun drawing my blorbos from my games and my brain in silly little situations. Fuck it we ball. I should really go to sleep now good night

[kpophubb]

Hi lovely ☀ I'm so happy to hear from you, this week I was literally checking your Tumblr five times per day with my tags. I miss you so much and this week I also needed you so much, but it's okay💛 I'm so sad that you are sick😿😿 I thought you recovered but you mentioned that you don't feel good and I'm just so sad about this(((

Honestly this week I have my period, and I have to take 💊 every single day because it's just so painful 😔so I think we could have some sick party together😹

I had an exam last week which I failed, but I was so confident but I failed and my manager was so stressful and is pressuring me so much😮‍💨🤕🥴

How were your weekends? Today is Sunday and I just don't feel anything ...tomorrow I have to start work again and it's not tomorrow even it's like in 6 hours(((

Today I talked to my grandma and the second time during this 10 months and she's not doing good and mental health is bad she's pretty messed up 😣😭I'm watching this one movie now and it just reminds me of some Horrors that have been through and how lucky I am to actually Escape. ironically the movie is called No Escape. The movie is so well done tho 😭😭💔😢🥺

I Never thought these things would ever happen to me.. or would ever happen in my reality 😔😔I am just so shocked that this happened and they're still consequences and I just don't want to be a part of this you know❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹💔 I wish all of this was just a nightmare and I wake up tomorrow and everything is like before

I actually wanted to send you a short message just wish you could have happy Monday and better week 😭😢🥺🥺🥺💛💛

Stay strong baby I am just so thankful that you exist thank you for all the love you give me💛

Thank you for hyunnies gifs and quotes 🤗💗 I miss you so badly

You probably have no idea and will never understand the way you helped me during this sickness period of my life😔❤️‍🩹💗 thank you so much for saving your hyunnie lixie. Please get well soon

🐁

Hi hi hi my love 🥺🤍 tumblr has been mean to me with my other asks since they crash when I make em too long (?) and can’t be edited later so here we go!😭 keeping it short but ilysm 💗 and value every little bit u say ~

First of all don’t worry about me, I’m doing better now altho I skipped my medication yesterday bc I thought I got better but apparently it made my sickness worse and took away my good night’s sleep 💔 but anyway I’m mentally active now..how are you feeling baby?:( is your period pain GONE?? I’m so sorry for being ia I’m here now promise ☀️💛🫂

The movie seems so strong..and really pain invoking and lesson learning is it on Netflix? If so, I’d love to watch while trying to understand you..

Aah it’s getting hectic for you I can say :( no sleep and so much work 😭 but I really hope smh u get a break soon and can rest as much as you need anonie. <3

I can understand about the whole nightmare part. Altho I have not been in such an intense situation like you (that’s why I give it to u always that you’re super strong bc you are my love) but I have had super dark times too and I can relate to that part where I’d be terrified and cry myself to sleep everyday and beg whatever deity was listening to make it better tomorrow and make it all vanish..but everyday I woke up and nothing changed and that made me feel devastated and made me feel like I was better off gone 💔

but I sincerely hope like me a time comes in your life where everyday would feel as good as a dream where you keep wishing you never wake up from the happiness..💖 the things of the past will never really leave u and even tho the shackles are gone someday and you’re free to walk forward, the scary marks will still be there to your feet. But look baby, slowly you’re healing even if it’s at a micro pace, getting a job, connecting w your family member (grandma) and slowly getting up even tho the suffocating feeling still haunts u, it’s slowly leading to a betterment. Like this, I’m sure you will walk towards light, love and happiness soon. Just faith it till u make it okay??

exams Are shitty..and it’s so disappointing to fail after giving your best it’s like realising your best never amounted to anything but hey love remember what I told u? “Human beings are filled w crazy potential even if you feel like u gave your best today you could still wake up tomorrow and try harder.” So keep your chin high, take a deep breath and try hard again. 💘 every success comes with ten failures, remember that.

and lastly I’ll always be here to save u and pull you up just like lixie does for hyunjin. It’s a promise, not a fancy statement. And I keep my words always. I love you sm and I couldn’t add the last quote bc that post isn’t working anymore but it was..

“The world doesn’t matter. YOU matter. 💛☀️..”♡♡

[starlightkun]

hi! i hope you’re doing well :)

i was wondering, how often do you write? and how much do you write during one writing session? or do you not care about the word count at all?

i usually open at least one of my word docs every day, even just to make small edits (i edit as i write, i dont save all my editing for when the whole thing is finished, though i do still proof a fic multiple times before it's posted). i don't have any sort of writing goals for myself when it comes to word count or how often i write or even editing every day like i just said. having any sort of rules (or even "guides" or "suggestions") would make approaching writing way too intimidating for me and just put way too much pressure and stress on something that's supposed to be fun for me. writing fic is truly one of the things that i can confidently say i love and i do for myself (i post so others can read, but i ultimately write for me) and i always want to keep it as something that i look forward to doing at the end of the day, not dread.

i understand for some writers, having a daily or weekly word goal is helpful, but i'd always recommend setting that really low (500 words/day or smth) bc you can always surpass it and be happy and motivated to write even more, but if you set it way too high (5000 words/day) you'll probably never be able to meet that every day and will feel like you've failed at something that was supposed to be fun, and then dread opening that word document.

if i can feel that i've gotten stuck on a wip, i let myself work on other wips, or not write at all. your mind will continue working in the background while you do other stuff (sleep, shower—why so many good ideas come to us in the shower, read other people's fic). i just try to stay aware of when i've officially been avoiding a wip for "too long." this can be any amount of time, depending on how internally motivated i am to finish it, but often times coming back two weeks, a month later with fresh(er) eyes, i can then try to figure out what was making me stuck and try to solve it (whether it was pacing—usually the culprit, how all these disjointed scenes i have planned are going to go together, they confessed—now what?, etc.)

so yeah, while some days i may write almost 10k (insane), 5k, 2k (more typical), there's others where im purposefully avoiding my wips. i also don't ever have a target total word count in mind when i start a fic. sometimes i think an idea is just going to be a "cute 5k" and then it ends up at over 20k (which seems to....always happen) and sometimes i get an idea and i know that in order to fully explore it like i want, it's going to be an investment of 20-50k. but if it ends up longer or shorter, that's never really intentional on my part. i just write until it's done

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Care and Keeping of Dumbasses

Prompts: Some Remus or Janus angst with the other sides helping them out? Bonus points if it's the two of them suffering together, trying to protect each other (and failing) only for the others to come around and pull them out of the darkness before they drown. Virgil even understanding cause he knows how if feels when the darkness "corrupts" and tries to "destroy" and make them "unsympathetic".

DRLAMP is my fave! Sorry for the long request and strange idea! I'm new to your work and I'm in love with it! - anon

Tbh the name of your latest sanders sides fic made me think of my blankie which I’ve had since forever and can’t sleep without. What if one of the sides (such as like Virgil or Logan or even Janus) had some kind of security blanket/stuffie that they kept hidden bc they want to be taken seriously but when doing group sleepovers they always can’t sleep bc they don’t have their security item? (Feel free to do whatever you want with the prompt lol I love your work!!!!!) <3 - renjunstolemykidneys

Hi, if prompts are open, could you write a sequel to Care and Keeping of Idiots, maybe with the light sides taking care of the dark sides ? - anon

Read on Ao3 Part 1

Warnings: fear of darkness

Pairings: dlampr, can be platonic or romantic I really don't care

Word Count:

The Dark Sides have their work cut out for them.

As it turns out, the Light Sides do too.

“Janus?”

Janus turns the flinch into a simple quirk of his brow, straightening his gloves behind his back as he turns to face the intruder. He tilts his chin up, gazing at Patton down his nose and letting out a dissatisfied sound.

“My, my,” he sighs, “far be it from the days where people used to knock before entering my room.”

Patton raps the door lightly.

“By all means, come in.”

Patton steps inside, shutting the door behind him. Janus leans back in his chair, one hand curled up by his face as he crosses his legs, the others frantically pulling on their gloves under the cloak. He tilts his head back and purses his lips.

“What brings you here,” he drawls, “surely it can’t be anything important.”

“You haven’t come down to eat for a week,” Patton says softly, his voice void of anything that belongs in this room, “I’m worried.”

“How touching.”

“Janus,” Patton says patiently, walking taking a step forward, “I’m here because you told me to be here.”

“Oh, come now,” he chuckles, standing up and running a finger under Patton’s chin, “are you still believing every word I say?”

He leans closer, waiting for Patton to flinch.

“Good.”

Patton barely blinks, his hand coming up to take Janus’s in his, pulling it away from his face.

“You can’t frighten me,” he says, still speaking far too softly for Janus, “and you can’t make me leave.”

“Oh, can’t I?”

The familiar lie of Deceit washes over his tongue, thousands and thousands of words flooding into his mouth as he tilts his head.

“Can’t I, Patton,” he says, looming over the other Side, “can’t I make you leave?”

He looks down at their clasped hands, turning them slightly as if to mock the way the darkness wants to cling to Patton.

“Can’t I tell you that everything you’ve ever hoped for is a lie,” he murmurs, “or that it’s contributing to Thomas being hurt worse than we ever thought possible?”

Patton is quiet.

“Can’t I just use you,” he continues, another hand coming up to ghost past his cheek, “the way I did Roman? Use you up and throw you out the minute you don’t blindly comply with my plans anymore?”

Deceit curls his mouth into a smile.

“Can’t I drag you down with me,” Deceit hums, “down into the depths where you’d never escape? I could fill your mind with the worst thing you can imagine, have you second-guess everything you think you know…you’d never leave.”

He leans close enough to whisper in Patton’s ear.

“Can’t I make you leave,” he whispers, “can’t I make you?”

Patton is silent, Deceit still looming heavily in the room, and then he chuckles.

“No, Janus, you can’t.”

And then warm, warm arms are around him and Deceit stumbles, his hold of his tongue slipping away faster than he can recognize it, leaving Janus slumped in the embrace. Patton makes a shushing noise, quickly switching his grip to support the dead weight.

“It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s over now.”

Janus’s hands come up to shakily grip at Patton’s shirt, the gloves still a little haphazardly tugged on. Patton turns his head into the crook of Janus’s neck and Janus shudders.

“You told me to come,” Patton murmurs, stroking his hand up and down Janus’s back, “if I ever felt Thomas’s heart start to hurt like this, you told me to come.”

Because Janus could lie, lie, lie, to everyone including himself, but Thomas would feel it hurt somewhere.

“You came,” he says through a sluggish tongue, “you…you came.”

“Of course,” comes the immediate reply, “of course I did.”

Janus closes his eyes and just breathes. Breathes and lets the rush of light chase away the shadows still snatching at his back.

“Pat—Patton?”

“I’m here, sweetheart,” Patton murmurs, “I’ve got you.”

“Thank you,” he gasps, “I…I didn’t think that would happen.”

“Bad brain days happen to everyone,” Patton assures, “and we’ll be here for you when they do.”

He pulls back after another moment, patting Janus’s shoulder.

“Now come downstairs and eat. It’s your favorite.”

—————————————

Some people think that because Remus is most often seen in the darkness, he isn’t afraid of it.

That isn’t true. Rather, it is precisely because Remus is most often seen in the darkness that he is afraid of it.

The darkness knows him. Knows him inside and out and would love nothing more than an excuse to turn him into nothing more than a shadow, part of its mass. He lies awake at night when it threatens the very corners of his existence, always watching, always waiting.

“Remus?”

Remus bolts upright, startled from the sudden interruption, only to see Logan at the door. Logan tilts his head.

“Are you alright?”

“…Lolo?”

“It’s me, little one,” Logan says softly, raising his hands as he walks across the floor, “we’re in the mansion you and Roman created, it’s alright.”

That’s right. It was sleepover night and the twins were hosting. Remus swallows, throat suddenly dry as Logan eases his weight down onto the bed.

“You don’t seem to be alright,” he says softly, “would you like to tell me what’s going on?”

Remus swallows again. Logan knows. Logan knows, he’s talked about it with Logan before. Logan—Logan can help.

“It’s the dark,” Remus mumbles, hiding his face as it burns in shame, “I—I can’t stop it.”

“Oh, you poor thing…” Logan reaches out to cup his face gently. “Do you want me to help?”

Remus nods, shamelessly burying his cheek in the warmth of Logan’s hand. For a moment, Logan lets him.

Then he pulls away, leaving Remus staggered by the loss.

“You have ten seconds to run,” he says, “and then I’m coming to catch you.”

He bolts upright. “Wh-what?”

“You have ten seconds to run,” he repeats, a smile crawling across his face, “and then I’m going to come and catch you.”

“What will you do with me once you catch me?”

The smile glimmers with shadow. “If you don’t start running, you’ll find out in ten…nine…”

He runs.

His heart pounds in his chest as he stumbles out of the sheet, the shadows nipping at his heels, delighting in the way he plows through them. The house yawns, luring him down, down, down into the dark, through the halls, down the staircases, racing across marble floors. He scarcely feels the chill under his bare feet. His breath rings in his ears. The shadows flock to him.

He’s coming. He can feel Logan behind him. A string punctures his navel, through the small of his back, winding through the manor, straight into his hands. He can feel him. He can feel him. He can hear him. The fear ices over his hands, his arms, his legs, his feet, down to his very core. He pants. He stumbles. He hits the ground. He gets up. He runs.

The light flickers.

In the bowels of the mansion lie doors not illuminated by candlelight. He tears through the rooms and disappears into the blackness. Here, the shadows surround him, urging him deeper. He can feel his eyes on him, his hands reaching, grasping, just behind him. He rushes and plunges further, deeper, faster.

The room he rushes into is pitch black.

He stops, breathing hard, his chest heaving from the force of running too far, too fast. In the blackness, he can’t tell if he’s staring at a wall or at another ballroom, yawning around him. The shadows wriggle with glee as the door slowly creaks shut. He can feel it. Every nerve in his body tingles, searching for something, anything, anyone…

Slowly, so slowly, he begins to walk forward, arms outstretched, stumbling a little as he creeps into the room. The shadows blanket him, wriggling into every little nook and cranny. They shroud the fear with their icy tongues, molding it to his skin, sculpting him with their clever fingers. His fingers brush something, a door? No, a cabinet. He turns the knob. Reaches inside. Space. Empty space. A haven in the darkness.

He keeps moving, exploring the vast room. It truly is vast, stretching further and further away from the door. Is he still walking straight? Where did he come from? He can’t tell anymore.

“Little one~”

His next inhale is almost a scream before he claps his hand over his mouth. There’s something large next to him. He ducks down, cowering against it.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are~”

A door.

Light.

A silhouette.

He keeps his hand over his mouth as Logan steps inside, leaving the door open, letting the light stream in. A lure. A trap. His footsteps move slowly around the room. It’s a…parlor, of some sort?

Logan crosses the threshold, walking over the creaking floor. Remus moves, sticking to the places where the floor has settled. The wood splinters and threatens to catch on his hands. Logan walks closer and closer.

Remus ducks around the edge of a couch and shimmies up against a shelf, pressing his back to the wood. He can’t hear him. Where is he? He’s not moving. There are no footsteps. Is he still here? Did he leave?

Is this another trap?

Peering around the corner, his heart in his throat, he looks furiously for any sign of him. The door sits there, innocently open, shining its light into the room. From where she is, he can’t see him.

“Where are you,” he whispers, barely audible to even himself, “where are you?”

“Here.”

A scream tears itself out of his throat as he startles horribly, nearly knocking over the shelf as he races to make it to the door. He grabs his shirt and he wrenches away, diving out and racing to make it to the stairs.

He hits the first step and stumbles. The string in his navel snaps taut, slowing him down, holding his legs. Another grab and he pulls with all his might. Again, he gets away. It isn’t until the third tug that he realizes what he’s doing.

He’s taunting him. Teasing him by letting him get away over and over. He can grab him easily and he’s letting him know. He draws out the chase, making him dance, letting him run, snatching every last bit of hope that he might get away with a quick tug to the back of his shirt.

Hopelessness draws the fear up, into his throat, pressing against where it settled over his eyes. Fat tears threaten to roll down his cheeks as he pants louder, each inhale just about a whine as he closes in. He’s tiring. Logan can feel it.

This tug sends him careening into a wall. The next one threatens to send him to the ground entirely. The third one succeeds.

He wails as he topples, his body smacking into the carpet. Logan lifts his foot to step onto the folds of fabric pooling between his knees, trapping him neatly in place. He all but convulses on the floor in front of him. His panting breaths ring in the hallway, still scrabbling to get away. Logan lets him tire himself out, slumping with his arms spread wide.

“I’ve caught you, little one,” Logan says softly, “and now…I shall claim my prize.”

Remus strains against the iron heel pressed against the floor. He struggles, he flails, his eyes wide, pleading, begging, no, please, don’t, let me go—

“That was not the deal, my dear,” Logan interrupts smoothly, even as he strains against his hold, “I have caught you.”

He kneels over his shaking, prone form, bending down. His hair catches in his palm as he presses himself into the floor, hoping to slip away, to escape whatever fate must befall him. The fear ices him in place, the shadows retreating to peer out from the corners. He leans down, closer, closer, closer—

—to drop a kiss onto his cheek.

“Thank you, little one,” he whispers.

“That…that’s all?”

“That’s all, little one,” he repeats, smiling gently, “and now…now let go.”

The ice shatters.

The fear has nowhere to go. It shifted, honed itself into a suit of armor to encase him, to move him, puppet him through the halls tied to Logan’s hand, only to have nothing to protect against. Instead, it pours off of him in rivulets, then streams, as tears from his eyes, as horrible tremors that wrack his every muscle, in cries that ring out into the still air around them. Logan picks him up out of the corpse of the armor, cradling him like a babe in his arms as he walks. He only sobs harder.

“Shh, shh,” Logan murmurs, “let’s get the rest of the shadow off of you.”

He lays Remus down in his bed, the warm light from the nightstand chasing the shadow away.

“We focused your fear,” Logan explains, rubbing Remus’s shoulders to help him warm up, “and then released it. Like a horror movie; you have the catharsis of being scared safely. They can’t touch you anymore, little one, I promise.”

Remus leans his head into Logan’s chest and just breathes.

Logan stays with him for the rest of the night.

—————————————

Virgil knows what it’s like to be the hated side.

He knows, he does. He knows what it’s like to have nothing but pure, unadulterated disgust spewed at you from every corner of the internet. He knows what it’s like to dread to see something come up where you have to go because you know you’re going to spend the entire time wincing and flinching, if not on the outside then definitely on the inside.

He knows and now…now he knows what it’s like for that to not be a thing.

He knows what it’s like to be cared about. He knows what it’s like to have people checking in on you, he knows what it feels like to be checked up on. He knows what it’s like when someone knows what you like or don’t like, he knows, he knows.

He can go ask Patton for advice. He can spend hours upon hours just sitting with Logan. He can shamelessly bury his face in Roman’s arm until he laughs and sets aside his work to spoil Virgil with attention.

He knows what it’s like to be trapped in the dark, under the heel of the people who’d rather not see you unless it’s to watch you crash and burn. He knows what it’s like to be seen as only the bad thing you represent, making it worse and worse and worse until it consumes you.

So he grits his teeth, buries himself up to the elbow in darkness, and heaves with all his might to get the others out.

He drags Janus up from the web of lies and parks him in the middle of the couch to be drawn into conversations he doesn’t even try to follow. He shoves aside the monsters trying to tear Remus to shreds and unleashes Roman onto them, watching the brothers fight.

And it’s so much better.

It’s so much better to not drown in the sludge of hatred. It’s so much better to just be here, themselves, and not what they represent.

��that doesn’t mean everything’s gone, though.

Virgil is Anxiety, to a certain extent, and there’s no getting around that. He still gets nervous when things happen, he’ll still get the feeling that he needs to run, he needs to hide, he needs to fight. And yes, he still gets nervous that one day, everyone will realize he’s actually awful and he’ll be left alone, in the dark.

So he keeps certain things to himself.

He doesn’t tell anyone about the stacks of snack food he has stashed around the Mindscape. He doesn’t tell anyone about the spare hoodie he never takes out of the laundry room.

He definitely doesn’t tell anyone he still sleeps with a blanket.

The other Sides have comfort objects. Logan went on a whole impassioned rant about them once, when Thomas had overheard some mom in a grocery store bragging about how early she’d been able to get her children to give up their stuffed animals. Something about how forcing someone to give up a comfort object before they were ready leading to the development of long-term issues, not to mention the violation of their privacy.

Intellectually, Virgil knows that if the others were to find out he sleeps with a blanket, nothing bad would happen.

Emotionally, every time there’s a movie night, Virgil stays doggedly awake, counting the seconds until it’s time to get up. Even when the others are dozing around him, Janus’s head on his shoulder, Patton’s head in his lap, he stays awake. He passes his darkened eyes off as more eyeshadow, residual from something, and retreats to his room where he can bury his face in his bed and sleep.

Of course, eventually, someone finds out.

“Virgil,” Roman calls when they’re left alone in the living room while the others are getting everything ready for movie night, “why do you never sleep during these?”

Virgil freezes. “Don’t know what you mean, Princey.”

Roman sighs slightly but there’s no weight behind it. “If you don’t want to tell me, I’ll back off, but don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Virgil curses.

“Don’t let Patton hear that,” Roman teases, coming up beside him and bumping their shoulders together, “what’s up, Dark and Stormy?”

Virgil balls his fists inside his hoodie. Roman waits, patiently, until he mumbles something.

“Hmm?”

“I just can’t.”

“Is it the fact that we’re in the living room? I’m sure the others would be happy to—“

“It’s not that.”

“Is it…all of us? Cat piles can be a lot of sensory input.”

Virgil shakes his head. Roman lays a hand gently on his elbow.

“Then what?”

Fuck it.

“Don’t have my blanket.”

Roman looks confused. “Your weighted one? You can bring that if you want, Virgil, no one would mind.”

Virgil shakes his head, valiantly ignoring the heat in his face. “My blanket.”

“Your…” A look of understanding crosses Roman’s face. “Virgil, you’re allowed to bring a comfort object with you if you want to.”

He huffs.

“I mean it,” he says, gently turning Virgil to face him. “If anyone’s rude to you about it, I’ll kick their ass.”

A smile tugs at the corner of Virgil’s mouth. “Don’t let Patton hear you say that.”

“I will happily sacrifice all the money in the world to the swear jar,” Roman vows dramatically, “if that is what it takes.”

Virgil can’t help it, he laughs. Roman laughs too, before carefully coaxing Virgil into a hug.

“You’ll be fine,” he promises, “I’ll bring mine too.”

“Bring what?” They look up to see Remus and Logan holding so many pillows. “Pillows? We got you.”

“Nah,” Roman says easily, “I just forgot my comfort object. I’m actually trying to sleep tonight.”

“Oh, shit, I forgot mine too.”

Logan adjusts his glasses. “As did I. Meet back here in five?”

Roman tips Virgil a wink as they leave the living room. Virgil lets himself smile.

He’s able to sleep fine that night.

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(About the brother!atsushi) aRE YOU READING MY MIND MISS?! Because that has been on my mind for MONTHS. TYSM For writing it was amazing!! If you don't mind, may I request (if requests are open) atsushi, still an older brother, but with a sister that's 10-13 yrs old? It's totally fine if you don't wanna do it. Keep up the good stories, ily mwuah!

*sobs* you’re so kind thank youu 🤧🤧

i wrote this a bit differently i hope that’s okay anon! at first i planned for this to be mainly abt atsushi and the reader, but i decided to add in relationship hcs with the agency bc i ran out of ideas

if you guys liked this don’t worry! im planning a special part two for this one so be the look out for it hehe

atsushi with a tween! sister

ft. the armed detective agency

like in my baby sister hcs, you’re still the most important thing to him period

the two of you got picked up by dazai and kunikida when he was 18 (obviously) and when you were 12

for a 12 year old, you were a bit small bc of malnourishment (which makes atsushi feel so bad) so both dazai and kunikida thought you were a bit younger than you actually were

they assumed you were about 9-10ish

you and atsushi both share a favorite food !! chazuke :)

so when kunikida treated the two of you, he made sure you got more bowls bc like i mentioned above, he feels really bad that you were malnourished and under weight

(don’t bring this up but kunikida felt bad too hehe)

when dazai went with your brother to the warehouse, you were with kunikida

imagine the surprise of the other ada members when kunikida came in with a little girl dressed in rags that popped out from behind him

kenji was the one who vocalized his thoughts 

“kunikida-san you have a daughter?! wow! i didn’t know that! :D”

when you found out your brother was a tiger, you were a bit concerned but you were actually kind of excited

you were even more excited when you found out the two of you were going to be taken in by the agency

anything was better than the stupid orphanage

and besides!

you got a tiger for an older brother and a bunch of other super powered agents to take care of you! who could want anything else?

at your age, you’re very impressionable and can be influenced easily so atsushi makes sure to teach you more in depth of good morals and the importance of kindness

his heart swells with pride and relief when he catches you being kind to others

pride bc he’s proud that even after all the two of you have gone through, you still ended up being a good kid and having a bright view of the world

and relief bc he hasn’t failed as a big brother

pfftt like he could ever fail

but please, from time to time reassure him that he’s perfect and the only big brother that you’d ever want bc he rlly needs that kind of validation

with his salary and savings, he tries to buy nice things for you

what a sweetheart 🥺

he saw you eyeing that one dress at a store window? fast forward abt a week and half and it’s inside a pretty gift bag for you

you wanted to try that dessert from the nice bakery? that’s dessert after dinner at one point

but other than buying you things, he sets money aside for you

like all the time

(y/n), here have this, you might need it”

“but nii-san you just gave me—”

“take it”

#1 spoiler

also your #1 confidant and source of physical affection

you tell him anything and everything (except crushies and those kinds of things)

atsushi loves it when you talk abt your day and he can see the big smile on your face and the sparkle in your eyes

it gives him the strength to keep going 😖😖

the two of you aren’t as touch starved as you’d probably think, but that’s only bc the two of you had each other

in your opinion, no one can match the hugs of your big brother

and it got even better bc YAYY he has tiger arms now ٩(◕‿◕)۶

if you ask, he’d carry you around too hehe

you also get nightmares quite often so he’ll always be there ready to calm you down, talk if you need to, and rock you back to sleep

god i love him 🤧🤧

atsushi will do everything in his power to protect you and make sure you get to grow up happy, supported, and loved

port mafia attack? oop he’s already taking you to the nearest escape route

someone is starting to harass you? they just got suckered punched into the next week

you want to go out to have some fun? he’ll go ask the president for a day off

you’re not feeling well? he’ll take another day off and take care of you

whatever you want to do, he’ll do it with you! (as long as it’s within reason)

will always be your #1 supporter! and he’s the president of your fan club hehe

he loves you so so much and will do anything for you; your life and happiness will always be more important to him

you are his reason to keep going

agency head canons !!

atsushi is your big brother, but kunikida is most definitely some sort of father figure

everyone can see it

except kunikida of course

kunikida scolds you lightly if he thinks your manners need work or if you make a mess in the agency

you listen to him of course and in turn as some sort of a reward, he’ll give you pieces of stationary

he always gives you the nice, good quality kind and you’re over the moon

atsushi adores it when you come running to him showing your new notebook or fountain pen and blabbering what you’re going to do with it

sometimes it isn’t even as a reward for being a good child; he’ll just give it to you and he’ll say smth like “i noticed you’ve used up your last notebook quite quickly, so here’s another one” or “did you run out of ink? here have this then”

he usually has a soft spot for children in general, but he most definitely has a soft spot (or a thousand) for you

yosano is kind of like a motherly figure to you

she gives you the guidance a mother should and goes on shopping trips with you!

atsushi always gets dragged along by you, but he thinks it’s worth it seeing you look so happy

yosano being a doctor also tries to teach the things you should know, or things that would be helpful to you

she’ll teach you the basics of cooking, sewing, how to treat a cold/fever, etc

also gives you excellent advice 1000% of the time

“remember (y/n)-chan if someone hurts you come tell me and then i’ll chop them into—”

“yOSANO-SENSEI DONT TELL HER THAT—”

fukuzawa is like a father to most in the agency but you see him more as a grandfather figure

bi weekly tea and gossip sessions hehe

along with cat talk!

most of the time though, it’s just you talking and him listening to you, but the two of you enjoy it nonetheless

“and then kunikida-san ended up crashing into a pole and dazai-san started to laugh at him and i did too because it was really funny but we ended up getting scolded—”

“hmm i see...”

he’ll let you stay in his office as he fills out paperwork; you’re usually doodling or drawing in your notebooks

sometimes he’ll meditate and you’ll join him, but 4/7 times you’d fall asleep

you always wake up with a blanket over you

dazai is like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

frequently takes you out with him when he ditches work

walks in the park, eating at uzumaki so he has the excuse of treating you so he doesn’t have to pay his tab avoiding kunikida and sometimes chuuya and akutagawa, all that fun stuff

also tries to not talk abt suicide in front of you especially if it’s just the two of you alone

he knows that you mean the world to his pupil and that said pupil would probably hate him for putting suicide inside your brain

he teaches you random but useful things like how to pick a lock, how to steal kunikida’s notebook if you’re looking for some information, how to sweet talk your way out of things, etc.

is also the one to tell you that if you ever get a significant other to introduce them to the agency first

he always wants all of your gossip; some of them work pretty well for blackmail

“dazai-san! dazai-san! did you know that kunikida-san lost his glasses and he was looking for them for nearly an hour when he was just holding them the entire time??”

“woah really (y/n)-chan?! hey hey can you say it again into this recording device so kunikida-kun would believe me when i tell him—”

always ends up giving kunikida a heart attack when he says that you’ve been with him all day

ranpo is also like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

will share some of his snacks, but don’t push it or you might not get anything at all

loves it when you compliment him

if you tagged along with him and your brother on a case, he will show off to impress you

“...and that’s how the crime happened”

“UWAHH RANPO-SAN YOU’RE SO COOL”

atsushi is lowkey and kunikida is highkey stressed that ranpo’s eating habits will rub off on you

“ne (y/n)-chan do you wanna try this highly caffeinated drink and this concerning amount of sugar filled snack?”

“can i really?!”

“rANPO-SAN NO—”

ranpo definitely does stuff like that on purpose 

the tanizakis are like siblings to you!

a weird set of siblings but siblings nonetheless

the two of them adore you and think you’re precious

atsushi definitely knows how to do your hair whether it’s long or short but he got even better at it when he asked the two

hehe braid trains are definitely a thing + kyouka and kenji (and maybe even dazai)

sometimes you have sibling swap days

you’re with junichiro for most of the day and atsushi is with naomi

strange i know

each of the tanizaki siblings try to make it fun bc they know that the two of you did not at all have a happy upbringing

junichiro likes spending time with you by taking you out to different places that naomi likes to frequent

like the mall, different stores and restaurants, the park, places like those

naomi does the same thing with atsushi so if you ever bump into them, you go out and eat together :)

besides atsushi, the next one in line who spoils you the most would be junichiro (and yosano & kunikida both coming in at a close third)

he honestly can’t help it; you remind him of how naomi was when she was younger

and besides

he’s always been a sucker when it came to the happiness of a little sister

“would you really buy this for me junichiro-san?!”

“of course! don’t worry about it” :)

wanna talk abt boys/girls/celebrity crushes things like that? naomi is your girl

you feel a bit embarrassed to go talking to yosano or your brother abt that and kyouka does not know a thing abt them either

“uwahh naomi-san look at all these people in this magazine! they look so good!”

“right?! but of course onii-sama is still the best—”

you get along with kenji and kyouka quite nicely being roughly the same age as them; they’re also like siblings!

just pure, wholesome vibes from the three of you

you’re over the moon when she finds out that kyouka is staying with you and your brother

atsushi is twice as happy seeing you talk your mouth off and finally having a girl around your age to talk to

“do you think demon snow can change how she looks?”

“hmm... im not sure...”

you and kenji talk abt anything and everything

he even teaches you how to take care of plants!

sometimes the two of you are kind of in the same boat bc you don’t know much abt yokohoma being stuck in the orphanage and kenji doesn’t know much abt cities in general

“wait where are we again kenji-san?”

“ah we’re close to the ports! but im not really sure how close because i don’t know what the symbols on this sign mean”

“don’t worry! neither do i!”

bonus things!

yosano was kind of too late teaching you abt you know what

“NII-SAN IM BLEEDING IN BETWEEN MY LEGS”

you’re sobbing in the agency’s bathroom and atsushi is panicking trying to get you to open the door

“Y/N?! H-HOLD ON LET ME GET YOSANO SENSEI”

ranpo overhears and cackles making everyone around him confused

suddenly atsushi bursts in the agency basically on the verge of tears rambling incoherent sentences abt the bathroom, you, and blood

it just clicked for everybody in the room

(im going to pretend that kenji has sisters back home so that atsushi is the only one who remain oblivious here hehe)

atsushi is genuinely confused and sort of concerned that no one is freaking out with him

yosano waves her hand saying smth like that she’d take care of it and junichiro pulls atsushi to the side to talk to him

fast forward like half and hour and dazai and ranpo are cackling on the looks of both of your faces

honestly not sure who’s more traumatized, you or your brother

“why does this have to happen” :(

“ne ne (y/n)-chan!~ you’re too young but at some point you’re not going to have it!”

“uwahh really dazai-san?” :D

“yeah! but first you have to have ANFK—”

next thing you know your ears are being covered by your brother and dazai is thrown across the room by kunikida

you know

the normal

you’re twelve and have never gone to school, but the agency takes care of that

it’s too dangerous to go to school so they teach you what’s necessary and whatever else they can

kunikida takes care of math (obviously)

yosano takes care of science/biology/anatomy/health (whatever you wanna call it)

ranpo even dragged poe to help you with english

atsushi even got lucy to help you out with english too!

as tanizaki and naomi used to be students, they give you their old work books and they try to teach you all the other subjects

sometimes kyouka and kenji are there learing with you too!

sorry if there’s some errors! i’ll read through it again later :)

and as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason