#bc even within myself i feel invalidated because im like

[girlsdads]

being depressed but not suicidal is a very strange thing to reckon with for me personally

[fujimiiiya]

im always confused about people who harass and bully when its easier to just block users who enjoy ships and taboos they don’t like or are uncomfortable with. i personally take no offense to that. i think its more respectful and safer for everyone. i know it can hurt sometimes but being attacked hurts more smhh

Imo it's useless to try to understand why they prefer to act like jerks to strangers bcs they are, like you said, harasser and bully in their core, while we are not. Another thing is they have too much free time on their hands but not much exciting things happen in their lives so they need smth to do or distract themselves from reality, and what they choose is to be lowlives hiding behind online anonymity bcs it's relatively safe. They won't get real lawsuits for online insults, right? The most they can get is being reported, (if the assaulted even care enough or take them seriously enough) and lose their free account, which they can always make a new one. It's a cowardice act and ppl who actually know better and have better moral grounds than what these harassers always preach about won't do. It's totally not worth to even regard them, ppl who choose to insult real person over fictional characters, that alone makes their logic automatically questionable, bcs there are more important matters out there than defending fictional characters that will nvr say thanks to them anyway.

There's a lot of plausible underlying causes:

1. they could be ppl with lots of RL problems, frustrated, or even oppressed ppl irl who can't act how they really want so they need some kind of outlet to vent and thus they act like some righteous thugs.

2. They try to cover their insecurity, low self-esteem, or inferiority complex by acting aggresive. By harassing others who they think are 'immorals' about fiction, they get some sorta self-validation, satisfaction, no matter how vain and petty it is, that they are the ones who are right and thus superior ones.

When it comes to ship wars, those who are deliberately shitting on the ships or shippers themselves most of the times can actually due to some degree of them being insecure abt their own ships, but they'd try hard to deny it with all their might. If they are confident abt their own faves or ships, they wouldn't focus on characters or ships they hate...or again, they have too much useless free time on their hands.

3. They try to find chances, thinking that by harassing those who like certain ships or the content creators for those ships continuosly, they will be discouraged or prevent others who are about to like the ship to be hesitant to show their love due to the drama, so the ships will look like they are less popular. This, I'm sure, is the case w/ some of popular ships that they deem as "problematic". However, we already know that it actually has reverse psychology effect, as the more we are harassed, the stronger mentality we have and the more we wanna show how valid and loved our ships are by creating more fanworks about them. Because we don't care what they say.

Now don't get me wrong. I do understand why some people dislike certain ships. I'm not trying to invalidate their personal reasons behind them. Fiction can indeed trigger some trauma or bad memories for others. Or you can simply dislike the ship bcs it's lame. I myself have so many landmines and dislikes when it comes to ships, or even tropes within my own ships. But I won't bother focusing on them, let alone spending time to interact w/ the posts I hate. I will just surround myself w/ things I like, with like-minded peeps. That's what makes us different from them.

Tldr; When the antis think it's alright to insult the shippers it's when they are no longer to be taken seriously and engaging w/ them has no point anymore. I think you don't even need to feel hurt about it. We should actually pity them bcs those who are fueled by negativity, must be surrounded by negativity too on daily basis hence that's what they know how to do. Trust me, someone who are surrounded by positivity and love irl, or want it that way, won't deliberately act like pricks or hate others over these trivial matters. It's their pettiness talking. Regardless, they still want you to think they are superior. Pity them and be the bigger person and don't let them drag you to step down to their low level.

[pluviiioo]

uh oh hot takes abound fellas

just a thought going thru me lately but i feel like mihawk x perona is so frowned upon is bc there's such an overwhelming amount of found family content surrounding them compared to ship art . like yeah if u surround urself with that kind of content seeing people shipping the two of them together is gonna be uncomfortable but at the end of the day its all just fanon lol.

in the same sense, thats why i dont like shanks x buggy. they were raised together on the same ship, so i always perceived their relationship more like siblings than lovers. but that doesn't invalidate people who DO want to ship them together; again it's all just fanon. the two ideas can coexist with each other, just separately yk.

anyway. i dont even ship mihawk x perona, if anything i project a lot of myself onto perona bc she's my twin (ong 💯🔥) so whenever i do see ship art between them im like twirling my hair bc its like im seeing me and bae together fr fr. perona is representation for emos who lust for older men, SHE IS MY REPRESENTATION!!! LOL

anyways. tldr dont bash people for shipping characters you dont wanna see together (as long as its within legal bounds 🚫pedophilia🙂‍↔️) because at the end of the day a lot of our perception of these characters is formed around the type of content we surround ourselves with

[celestie0]

ellie did you hear about the solar storm thing thats been going around?

my friend gave me a detailed explanation abt what it is whats going to happen n all n honestly i am TERRIFIED.

like it genuinely seems so real that i cant even convince myself that this is another one of those silly things that go around each year

the fact that research for this solar storm has been going on since 2019 is ???? scary ????

makes it seem more believable tbh bc if it was not real it wouldn't have been going on for so long

IM SO SCARED 😭 genuinely cried when my friend was telling me ab this and she also said thwt we'll get to know ab when the solar storm is going to hit about 30 minutes before AND NOW IM PARANOID BC IT CAN HIT ANY MOMENT NOOOOO

and to top this off my mother told me that not many ppl will survive till 2027 i have no idea where she got that from but she scared me even more

this is so bad.

hii my love yess ive heard of the solar storm, i know that solar flares in general have been talked about a lot for a while now but i didn’t know that there was recent news about it!

i’m sorry you’re experiencing anxiety regarding it :””( yeahh ive heard that solar flares are near impossible to predict in advance for a lot of reasons, so that can definitely heighten the fear

hm idk if it makes you feel better but i remember nasa n other news outlets were talking about solar storms the exact same way about a year ago (i just remember telling my dad ab it cuz he works in aerospace n figured his company might’ve been discussing it) but nothing happened at all within the six month period that the news had been freaking out about LOL. i panicked a lot then too n my dad said it was just fear mongering lmfaoo 💀 (he’s kind of a cynic though haha) but yea i just bring this up because it’s not the first time this sort of news has been sensationalized

following any sort of space stuff can be scary for sure n it’s super easy to get lost in article rabbit holes that can really disrupt your quality of life in the present :( but i think there have been multiple instances of space phenomena that have been hyped up in media (even by a lot of reputable news outlets) that have not really affected daily life as much as it was thought to (like the never ending cycle of news about new asteroids, the whole aliens thing, etc)

i think it’s important to remember that the scientists that are actually behind the research are completely different entities than the people writing up articles about it online, so you always have to take the news with a grain of salt or maybe try to look into accounts from the actual researchers behind the findings (who, more often than not i’ve found, don’t even panic about their own research to the level of extent a lot of media ppl do online haha)

i’m not saying i don’t believe in the possibility of a solar storm or anything like that lol i just think there’s a lot of tendency in news these days to scare tf outta people for no reason

also correct me if im wrong but the largest danger of a solar storm would be disruption of radio & internet frequencies right? i thought they werent actually powerful enough to cause any sort of biological radiation harm ;0 loss of internet access would definitely be a weird thing to see and could put stress on more developed countries, but a lot of the world doesnt even have internet access to begin with so i’m not sure how much it will actually affect livelihood (i’m aware that it’d affect a LOT of things for sure, but i’m talking ab dangers like life or death situations, n i just cant imagine that being the case? but if you’ve looked into that more than i have n have more to share then lemme know i’m really curious)

sorry, im just bringing this all up in hopes it helps w your fears, n not to invalidate them! bc i totally get it, it’s scary stuff esp when it’s stuff you feel like you have no control over. but there’s a lot of things in life we have no control over, i think it’s best to just focus on what we can control n just try to enjoy today :)

thank u for ask bb <3

[sociallyawkward--fics]

yeaa since the 2 months since ive sent u those asks (i think it was 2 months ???? idk) ive had a few more minor crises over whether or not i was aro (&a more memorable one recently where i completely convinced myself out of it for a day) bc im dumb& constantly forget that as much as i like to debate over whether im capable of experiencing The Romantic Attraction i have yet to do so -H

also ??? i just realized ??? i always think of romance movies as too quick paced bc who gets together within a few days?? weeks?? months?? obviously u need to know them better before u know if ud be compatible dating. But No That's Not How It Works What The Fuck the only romantics i will accept in this world r demiromantics /lh /j theyre the only ones who make sense -H (i saw smth somewhere abt how u dated ppl to get to know them better& my view of the world shifted drastically within seconds)

wait that reminds me of how when i was younger (younger being like .. a year or two ago) i thought the purpose of dating was to eventually get married so middle school relationships baffled me bc ???? theyre not gonna last that long ???? whats the point ???? but nooo u date ppl bc u enjoy being around them or smth what the fuck when will this stuff stop being confusing -H (why do i even bother questioning if im aro sigh)

theres also alot of theories abt papyrus bc he doesnt appear at all in the game but i am pretending i do not see it i will wait for canon -H

just realized i have no idea whether uve played deltarune but .. im just gonna assume u have ?? if not .. oops ?? i think i was gonna say smth else not pertaining to undertale originally but i got distracted give me a moment -H

oh wait yea i was gonna uh .. gender !! ! me too ! ! i am .. noncis. im not rly comfortable w using trans& nb is ok but .. i do technically identify w my agab so its not rly right. .. so uhhh im arogender !. !! im not sure how much i relate to the def but its also the only label ive found that feels right so ive uh just been using it -H (bc its not as much that my lack of romantic attraction affects my gender than it is uh my gender feels like my aromanticism ???but its a little of both i think)

---------------------

Gosh, I am still so sorry it took me two months to answer those other asks, I was way out of my own head for a while there. Thank you for being patient with me lol

And hey, remember: sexuality and romanticism and gender are all fluid. For some people, they change and shift over time. So if you’re aro now, and later on you realize you’re grayro or demiro or something like that, that’s valid. That doesn’t make the time you spent identifying as aro any less valid, either. This is a lifelong journey, for many people, probably including myself tbh. And who even says you need a label anyways? If you want one, then by all means, find one you’re comfy with, but you don’t need one if it’s stressing you out too much. But, hey, identify as aro for now if you want to. If later on you choose to change that, that doesn’t invalidate you or anyone else. It’s okay.

And yeah, big agree, romance movies always seemed p rushed to me lol. I’m here like “what do you mean people date each other to get to know each other??” Like, my aspec self does not understand lol. I think it’s likely why I’m so into friends-to-lovers/mutual pining/slow burn type stuff when I read shippy fics lol, I can’t vibe with the faster-paced stuff because it seems so unrealistic as someone who doesn’t experience the world like alloromantics (and allosexuals) do. Also, I also grew up thinking the point of dating was finding a spouse, but that’s because I was raised in the church and that’s what my dad raised us to believe, and also why my parents’ rule was “no dating before 16 years of age minimum”

I’ve played most of deltarune but I got stuck and then my computer reset and I didn’t finish it lol. But I watched Jacksepticeye play the whole thing!! It’s just been a while so it’s hazy, I didn’t obsess over it as heavily as I did Undertale back in 2015/2016 lol. Still very excited for what comes next though, even though I’m not super caught up with the background lore and the fan theories lol.

Your gender is so valid kiddo, you do you. I usually refer to you with they/them in my head, is that chill or do you have different pronouns you use? I realized I had never thought to ask before even though I really should have lol

I hope you’re doing well!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

[prenupsremade]

VENT POST !!! TW for abuse and drug mentions and family and ventign oh my god im so sorry But i guess more info into my situation

for years i’ve invalidated the abuse i’ve gone through bc i’ve always told myself they love me and theyre hurting too but i’ve realized now that even if they do love me and are hurting too, that doesn’t mean they’re not abusing me and hurting me. i need to get away from them. they’ve always blamed the problems we face with my siblings on me, because i set a bad example by being depressed and dropping out of school, and initially it wasn’t like this.

when i chose to live with my grandparents, it was after being taken away from my neglectful mother who was (and still is) an addict. my grandmother could no longer work after dealing with cancer for several years, but she was in remission (and still is) and my grandfather had a stable job. i was with them often and was comfortable with them, so i decided to move in with them (my brother accompanying me). i was 12 years old, my brother 4, and the adoption process lasted until i was 15 and my brother was 7. in that time, my great grandmother, whom my grandmother was very close to, passed away, and my brother and i were prevented from seeing our mother for years after she became homeless after the incident.

several months after the adoption process, due to extreme bullying from other students and even Teachers, i dropped out of school, and right after my 16th birthday, my aunt took her life, leaving behind three children, all under the age of ten. her husband was a drug addict as well and was very u nstable, having tried to take his own life many times within the whole time i’ve known him, and the children were taken away. they were also adopted by our grandparents

my grandmother fell into a very intense depression after losing my aunt, who she felt was like the only child she had who wasn’t a mess. she stopped getting out of bed almost completely, leaving my grandfather to take care of all of us. within this time, i began to realize my grandfather was extremely controlling and emotionally manipulative, and often would pit my brother and i against our cousins. my brother began being neglected for our three cousins, two of whom were the same age as my brother, the other being a baby. i didn’t notice the neglect at the time, as i was often giving into my grandfathers tormenting

as i turned 17, my cousins adoption process was finalized, and things didn’t change much, later in the year my grandfather losing his job and having to drive an hour of town almost everyday to visit his mother with dementia, who he refuses to put in a nursing home. my grandma is still in bed all the time. my mother was let back into the picture and although she now lived across the country, she’d visit during the summer, but in the summer of 2018, when i was 18, she came down and relapsed on drugs and had a psychotic break, and now refuses to leave. she’s been here since, staying with her friend but visiting all the time unexpectedly.

my mother is now extremely violent and aggressive with me, verbally, physically and emotionally abusing nonstop, and my grandmother’s depression has gotten so bad that she wails daily from her bed about how she doesn’t want to live. she’s self harmed and when my grandfather asked her why, she looked at me (who previously self harmed when i was younger) and she said she wanted to know why i do it all the time.

my brother has become extremely reclusive as well, and our cousins have begun to see the treatment we’ve been enduring and our grandfather knows this, so when he buys food for our cousins but not me and my brother and we’re vocally upset, he says “look, you’re making your cousins want to die”

this is Every Day . Every day he does this. and every day my grandma lays in her bed and sleeps, and if my siblings or i try to speak to her about.. almost anything, she guilt trips us, saying she knows she’s a failure of a mother and that she should’ve never had kids, and that its my fault im being treated like this by her bc i chose to live with her instead of someone else back when i was being adopted (my grandfather very vocally carries a similar idea- saying if its so bad here, then we (including the kids) should just go move in with our unmarried great uncle, who doesnt have the space or money or time to take care of 4 kids and help me get on my feet at the same time.and not to mention my mother is now back in the picture and constantly harassing me and abusing me, then gaslighting me, and telling me i’m abusing her.

all three of the older kids (my brother and our two cousins) have dropped out of school, similar to me, and they don’t feel safe enough to tell us what the problem or with zoom calls is. and even when we’ve done homeschooling programs, our grandparents don’t monitor them - and so none of the kids do any school work.

im 20 now, turning 21 in january and tbh i feel like a monster, i feel like i deserve this because this is all i know, but then i go to a close friends house and see how fucking Normal things are and i’m so destroyed, i’m so sick of this, i’m so sick of living like this and i don’t know what to do. i don’t want anyone in my family to go through with losing anyone again bc all of my siblings and i are attached to each other, my grandmother can’t handle losing another person, i just need to have a place where i’m safe and my mother and grandparents don’t know where it is and the kids can come over and be safe and eat and fuck fuck fuck i’m so sick of this. i wish i was stronger and smarter and better and i wish i knew what i was doing so that i could DO IT

[tacittherapist]

((HS2 Spoilers under the cut!))

((For all the shit I give the epilogues, it does have its moments. Specifically highlighting this bit of dialogue here: ROXY: you think you choice mattered so much that no one elses could measure up? ROXY: n then what ROXY: did u get what u wanted? ROXY: did your life end and the points got tallied and you came out on top or like what? ROXY: still p much seems like were movin to me ROXY: and you sure dont seem like ur winnin so wheres all this good shit you got that you gotta go around handin out apologies for? ROXY: also damn dude while were at it!! ROXY: u forgot to actually say sorry in that apology! JOHN: no, i didn’t — i just meant... JOHN: i’m sorry for fucking up your life, or making it not— ROXY: i like my life!!! ROXY: i mean it aint perf and i got my share of fuckups n mistakes in there but you dont get to tell me its fucked up ROXY: or that it isnt real or somethin ROXY: its mine!

First: criticism. The writers wield this little section like a crude cudgel. They use it to underscore the weight of ‘canon’. This is the ‘candy’ timeline, so it supposedly ‘weighs less’ than the ‘meat’ timeline, but its characters still have meaningful thoughts and emotions. Here, John supposedly makes a choice that supposedly invalidates a bunch of supposedly important events, and Roxy here blows it all out of the water by claiming she made these choices too and that part of the blame rests with her in the direction her life has taken... which is total dogshit used to justify a bunch of really overt swings in character thematic. Continued here: ROXY: you wished i was one way the whole time we were married ROXY: but i wasnt ROXY: but now that youre all convinced ur the only real boy in a crowd o puppets ROXY: here i am bein me just like you ordered only i did it without your help ROXY: widen ur zoom my man!! ROXY: im not actin like this now because you want me to or bc you dont want me to ROXY: i was bad at standin up for myself then and im learnin to be good at it now ROXY: ive got my own self actualization train ROXY: ur just pullin in to one of my many roxy figures some shit out stations right as i built it JOHN: but... JOHN: you were never like that before i... ROXY: dude ROXY: where tf do u get off trying to decide what is or isnt me being “like me” enuff ROXY: do u think ppl stay the same their whole damn lives or what JOHN: you’ve really never felt like anything about our lives here was... off? ROXY: off from what exactly?? JOHN: the way things should be? ROXY: what does that mean???

Roxy here argues that there is no ‘one right way to be’ as a half-baked wink to the audience that all this gross mischaracterization is intentional and that it diverges so grossly from the established character arcs in order to demonstrate that nothing is set in stone. While technically true, this also makes for some pretty terrible writing.

Roxy was a caring, almost too involved individual before the epilogues. Her ditching Calliope for John and this messy marriage business and just letting Jane warp into a full-blown dictator makes no sense, even couched within the idea that ‘characters change.’ Yes, characters change, but there’s generally a reason for it! And not a shitty deus ex machina reason such as ‘John makes a choice!’ What even fucking happened to Candy Calliope anyway? She just fucked off somewhere? How do you sincerely throw a character away like that and then have the gall to wink at the audience as if what you’ve done makes sense? Changes in character are generally brought on by catalysts in their life! Trauma, joy, death, new settings, new ideas, events! Not... John deciding to eat a plate full of candy. If we had insight into Roxy’s thought process behind ditching Calliope and marrying John and having a kid on a whim, this might be saved. But we don’t even get a glimpse. Instead we’re pawned this shitty excuse for a very glaring departure from what we knew about Roxy. Character development is just that -- development! As in to become more complex or advanced! Roxy has made wrong choices in the past, yes, but her reasoning was laid bare in such a way that those wrong choices made sense for her to make. She then makes different decisions later because she learned from her wrong decisions. This is development! Her character is learning and changing behavior because of the things they’ve been through! Her reasoning for this awful series of bad choices is just... not explained, despite going against a ton of shit Roxy has learned. It’s slipshod. It’s careless. It’s sacrificing the tree to showcase the topper. The audience isn’t vested in this Roxy because she’s seemingly robbed of her agency, and then they’re trying to foist this idea that she somehow still has agency on us as if they didn’t preface the entire timeline with ‘well, all this shit is going to happen because we decided it and no other reason!’

Now: the praise. This bit of dialogue has huge implications for ‘non-canon’ dynamic. No, not ‘non-canon’ in the cheeky way the epilogues and HS2 claim to be ‘non-canon.’ I mean ‘non-canon’ as in this blog that I run and all the blogs that you, the reader, are writing and reading as well. Roxy’s insistence that characters change can swing the other way, too. Characters can develop in bad ways as well! Not bad as in bad writing, but bad as in flawed character reasoning! Suppose what Roxy learned from her time in HS1 was that most things can be solved by unvoiding fix-all solutions into existence? Then we might be able to see her trying to fix the human-troll-population issue by just... making more planets! Or unvoiding some sort of device trolls could wear that inhibits hivemind tendencies! That would be interesting and perhaps morbid to write about!! It would at least track with her past experiences!!! Or better yet: perhaps she actually takes a side against Jane (as she has done in the past) but instead of using their friendship as the moral plating, she went right into sarcastic arguments FOR eugenics to demonstrate how bigoted Jane was being? That’s a very Roxy thing to do!! She could have made the argument that if trolls need eugenics to suppress their violent tendencies, then so should humans! Having read about the Condesce’s eugenic practices during her formative years, this should have been fairly obvious to Roxy that what Jane was suggesting was from the same playbook, at least.

But I digress. What this bit of dialogue really does is give credence to us, the audience, in exploring these stories we’re currently writing for these pre-established characters. YES, canon Rose likely didn’t dabble so thoroughly in game magics, and she likely didn’t have as much anxiety as my Rose. BUT I prefaced my Rose’s current state with a bunch of events that make sense! She missed her rendezvous with the others! She had to float adrift, alone in a broadcast satellite, for nigh on a decade! She’s had a long fucking time to develop all these anxieties and mental illness because that’s what happens when you’re isolated for years! It is a tool I use to express my own anxieties and explore how someone might somehow overcome them! And most importantly: she’s still Rose. She has unprocessed mother issues. She cherishes her friends. She’s more than a bit gay. And she knows when the meta is using her and when it’s not, because she’s had a traumatic experience being used by Doc Scratch as a plot device. And that trauma isn’t going away (well, unless she gets therapy, but given the setting we’re writing... not likely), so she’s going to be overly cautious when it comes to big decisions involving her friends. What she’s not going to do is suddenly abandon everyone she’s departed from because uhhh Jade ate some bread the wrong way or whatever.

tl;dr: What this section of the epilogues/HS2 (well, really just this bit with Harry Andersen, Tavros, and Vrissy that is somehow more interesting than virtually EVERY OTHER PART of HS2) is telling us, the audience, is that it is good to diverge from canon. Non-canon characters will still have very real feelings and face very real consequences for their actions. Just... don’t do it like they did it. All these characters we’re writing for and all these events we’re writing around them... they’re valid! They matter! Just because they’re not canon doesn’t mean others are willing and wanting to read them, and that makes them important! Unfortunately, this also means the epilogues/HS2 are important, but let’s ignore that for now. What I’m trying to say is: be indulgent! Write the things you want to write! As long as they’re well-reasoned, they’re good writing! Characters can be overpowered! They can be cliche! They can have teenage problems as an adult! Just... give them a good reason.))

[vaultsixtynine]

gender post ://

mostly i feel like a lot of my feelings about my gender are entirely invalid because they arent like. i dont know. punk enough. thats joking, slightly, but also. im literally just leaning into Being Female because it gives me even a Modicum of self-worth. lmao! i Know its pathetic!

to elaborate: ive been overweight for most of my life, jsut a bit when i was younger, but then increasingly so as i aged and certain factors began to contribute more heavily

also a lot of my facial features combined with my weight and my relationship with gender as a kid (embarassed to be a girl / Not Like Other Girls) - and thus my outward presentation - made a lot of people read me as being A Boy when i was younger, even when i didn't want to be read as one

like i wanted to be Special and not Silly like other girls, but i still didn't really want to be read as A Boy. being a boy would mean that i was exactly like a lot of people i disliked at the time (ie, boys at school), so i would always get deeply upset when people would read me as a boy, even when i was dressing as a tomboy for years. i felt like if i was naturally more pretty than i Actually Was, then maybe people would realize i was a girl. but i still hated pink and i didn't want to wear Girly Things.

then puberty and so on happened, and i realized after a bit that i have PCOS (my mother does as well). the most feminine thing about me all through my teen years were my breasts, which are Not Small, and i often was irritated with their existence bc i didn't get along with my mother and all of her attempts to give me advice on more traditionally feminine things fell on deaf ears

i still mostly looked like a boy, had a fairly proportionally fat body, and didn't feel comfortable looking like A Girl because i didnt feel like i was actually pretty enough or good enough to be one, and was only barely shedding a lot of my internalized misogyny. but i still didn't want to be read as a boy. i had no concept of anything outside of the gender binary and my lack of ability to present as Female but my extreme dislike for being read as Male just made me angrier and more insecure as time went on

and for the most part i still feel that way. i started actually loving women as a concept and peeling back a lot of my internalized misogyny only a few yrs before i started college, and that changed how i Present Myself and also how i feel about other women, but not really how i feel about my own relationship with gender. i wear my hair long and use makeup and try to participate in femininity because it makes me feel like i'm actually good looking enough to Participate in a gender. without these trappings, i'm still overweight and struggling with self image, and PCOS makes me feel even more of a nasty gremlin in my own skin, with 'male' traits i Do Not Want. i'm never going to be beautiful so i just settle for passing as vaguely woman-shaped, because my brain will start losing its mind about how ugly i am if i don't. and like, is that healthy? are there underlying issues? do i really know how i feel about being a woman, truly, and have i fully processed how a lot of shit in my childhood has damaged my conception of gender and also my ability to feel Comfortable with gender? sure!

is it pathetic that i cling to femininity because at least appealing to someone (anyone) sexually or even just aesthetically (by operating within the bounds of accepted female traits) means i'm not entirely worthless? do i need therapy? probably also yes!

i wish there was a way to like. express that you want to be read as female and were afab but are also (due to various factors) so Constantly and Deeply unsure about that. so insecure and worried. trying so hard to love other women of all types but not feeling like enough of a woman to be read as one yourself. concerned about what that Means, both for your own self-image and also what you've internalized about womanhood.

i have such an immense set of double standards for myself and i'm just so extremely tired of seeing my own face and recoiling. of thinking that the gender that ive been referred to by for my whole life (except by people who thought i was a boy, which happened constantly until i was like 16) can feel so alien and unattainable and Not For Me

like maybe i shouldn't be trying so hard because gender is fake actually. but i need something to reach for, or i'm Just Ugly Forever, not really good enough to be anything at all

[ohsweetflips]

yes but youre saying the Only thing that makes someone a woman is if they say they are a woman. but then what is being a woman? if a person can be whoever and however they want within that category, and any way physically, then what would even be the point of identifying as a different gender ? if those labels are totally meaningless?

okay anon, i really don’t know what you want me to tell you?? fuck, i’ve been feeling so disconnected with “expected womanhood” for years now that i don’t even know how to Begin defining “””what it means to be a woman””” past identifying as one!!!! do you want me to spew the transphobic rhetoric of “you can only be a woman if you have a vagina”? because i’m not, because that’s transphobic as fuck and not true. do you want me to spew the western society’s sexist defintion of woman as being quiet, being submissive, being skinny, being something for everyone but herself? because i’m not, because that’s sexist and not true (and the only reason i make the specification on western society is bc i’m not educated enough about other cultures to even try making a comment). do you want me to spew the racist rhetoric that the only “””pretty””” “womanly” features are that of white women? because i’m not, because that’s racist and not true.

like!!! there is so much of gender that is just A Construct. and i’m not saying that people can’t appreciate gender! some people really like rooting who they are in gender, and i am not about to invalidate that, but a huge part of “being a man/being a woman” is set up by societal expectations, and it would be severely irresponsible and close-minded of me to be like, “oh, well, if you fit THESE certain boxes, then you’re a woman” when, in reality, i hope i’ve been educated enough (tho i still look to educate myself more bc we live in a very cisnormative society) to be able to aptly say, “if you identify as a woman, then you are one”

besides, i am literally One Girl who, to be very honest, has lived an overall priveleged life. i’m white and cis and grew up in a town more liberal than others and, tho im a lesbian and not very wealthy and have my own problems, that does not suddenly erase my privelege. i honestly think it would be incredibly irresponsible and also kinda fucked if i tried to make broad comments on what makes a “real woman”

like, again anon, idk if you’re just playing devil’s advocate or trying to do some type of educating in some questioning way or trying to back me into a corner, but yeah, if you’re trying to get me to reason with transphobic rhetoric on womanhood, it’s not gonna happen

[honkroo]

what’s my gender you ask? ahah funny question you see

gender is a very complicated thing for me bc it’s a social construct that doesn’t make sense or exist in my brain and i refuse to engage in social things that seem only harmful and are avoidable, however besides that gender seems not girl or boy not man or women, im afab so i especially hate social things (like wording and such) revolving are feminine ideals because it feels invalidating and sometimes very wrong, i think bc of this a i pull away and find myself leaning into the idea of transmasc however even still calling myself a boy feels wrong at times as well but if someone else referred to me as a boy or in a masculine way as long as it wasn’t exclusively i don’t mind in fact i quite like it my gender feels neither boy nor girl and also feels both quite a lot at the same time im not within the binary and also i am i’m boy adjacent yet not a boy and the easiest way to explain my gender for people who don’t fully understand is simply: not a girl

thanks for asking

[dilfhakyeon-moved]

gaslighting ! <3 "oh, i would never prevent you from eating, it's not all for your sister :) " =/= no u can't have fish it's for ur sister lol eat like 3 pasta “don’t say it’s my fault if u don’t eat ur sleep schedule is fucked up !!” me: hey i’m hungry and it’s noon. her: oh right lol. me: hey it’s 3 pm i’m still hungry yknow. her: ok lol. me: 4 pm ?? her: sure thing lmao. me: well it’s 7 pm i’ll go to sleep now. her: IM MAKING FOOD LOL DO U WANT SOME???? GEEZ UR SO IMPATIENT

i quote. “ i didn’t forget, i stopped thinking about it “ yeah and you went and talked to your friends and played your games while i was busy just... suffering i guess

me: hey i can’t cook, i wanna learn how to cool her, who never cooks: lol it’s not even that hard u cld do it urself me: a messy room with a lot of noise prevents me from focusing. if i tried cooking for the first time in such an environment i’d probably mess it up and ruin perfectly good food, especially if i don’t have assistance. i’m not the brightest child. i can’t do things on my own for the first time. her: You’re Just Finding Excuses To Do Nothing And Accuse Me

me: executive dysfunction, can't do shit by myself her: berates me for it, calls me a lazy fatass, tells everyone about how i don't help her around and how i'm Literally The Worst for complaining abt shit

me: you make me want to kill myself her: That's Emotional Abuse

her: if ! you don't like me !!! you'll go with your father who's a pedo and who traumatised you !!!!! i’m an angel !!!!!!! i never did anything wrong !!!!!!!!!!!

literally the lesser of two evils

blames me for wanting peace when she's a liar and she said it'd be too hot this afternoon to keep the windows open but when i tried to close them she went fucking bonkers apparently asking her when she goes to the doctor is a fucking crime, i can't want her to be away ? i literally spend my life wishing she doesn't exist and him neither

constantly finds things to invalidate me like ok i guess

"you can't tell people about that, they'd think we have problems and i don't take care of you" well bitch guess what ??? i'm a picky eater and eating the same thing a few times in a row makes me puke i literally can't fucking eat it anymore don't fucking blame me because you're uneducated and stupid and a dropout and i hate you

"i really don't wanna do this thing that could help you feel better about yourself so you'll just wait longer :// i'll also complain constantly about how helping you is a hassle and i hate doing things for you but if you complain about my bitching you're an arrogant child"

being wildly uninformed and like... not giving a shit abt it. like "yeah i care abt u so much" but then u do no research like lmao ok?? bitch. don’t say you’re so kind bc you’re pretending to be a decent human who takes her kid to the hospital if needed but behind the doc’s back you complain about it ruining your day and you don’t even try to know what the fuck is up

"we have to keep the windows open so we don't choke :) " smokes openly in the house where i can smell the smoke and she knows it makes me cough

if i like something "feminine" she'll try to prove i'm not a man and "see u like girl things" i never said i don't and they're not even girl things shut the fuck up ugly

“oh i think they want to be a guy to destroy the image of themselves their father had” how about i have a fucking mind of my own and real feelings karen you goddamn invalidating moron

when i first cut my hair short her first reaction was “you look like your father” like fucking really ??? my fucking god

“the lighter hair makes u look more woman :)” die

literally my aunt is such a better mother than my mother she started using masculine petnames for me and she always wants to see a smile on my face and she’s so great why did i get the mother who’s a stupid and mean jerk who doesn’t try to do anything for her kids i’m so tired

i’ve always been so afraid of death it’s my biggest fear

but she makes me want to kill myself and i don’t even know how to deal with that fact

i used to self harm accidentally last year which was the worst school year ever btw, and i noticed today id recently started doing so again and it stemmed from staying with her for too long since school is over

she causes such negative things within me then she pretends she’s a saint and i’m the worst child ever and “she was never like that with her mother” and “her mother would’ve hit her if she’d ever been like that” WELL MAYBE YOU’RE FINE WITH BEING ABUSED BY YOUR MOTHER BUT I’M NOT

“oh their grandmother is gonna complain about buying food for them but why don’t they give me the money ??? i can do it ????” bc your mother knows if she gives you the money you’ll spend it all on coke, cigs and my sister while i’ll get maybe one thing of food and she isn’t fucking stupid she knows i have to eat to survive unlike some others

[conflictedrabbit]

2* the AvPD

Conversation w/ my friend I mentioned earlier. With their name / identifying characteristics edited out and some chopping here and there. 

___: 

I made a post abt avod once tho and it got like A few rbs and I thought "if this isn't irony idk what is" Trje

66ccff: ekjal;kdjd;

___: 

me: why do, so many avoidants want to pay for being alive avpd Tumblr: hm . I relate

66ccff: ekleja;ejdl;k

___: me: I'm glad to know people relate but are we fucking ok

66ccff: 

LOL i mean mood tbh

___: HINESTLT like I noticed i do it cuz of you NFBNSBDKSBDKSS

66ccff: though do you mean pay as in like. pay the medical system or pay as in guilt

___: Guilt

66ccff: 

kejk;ldj;L yes ok that is definitely me me: i breathed 5 gallons of air within 3 hours i am so sorry world

___:

me: [realizes it's not entirely religious trauma and also probably just Guilt over taking up space and needing to help ppl otherwise Why Live?} 

Oh god me

66ccff: (this is not even ironic i get like this multiple times a week)

___: 

hdjhdjsd I've been having a bad ep lately actually and like I think I failed to look 5-6 people in the eyes today CUZ IM JUST [WALKS AROHND] WOW . TERRIBLE

66ccff: 

omg it's ok i nearly cried in class today b/c i didn't have a good eng translation for this jp sentence

i was like.... no.... don't....

i stabilized cuz the teacher went on a tangent for a second but like forcing myself to look in his eyes and act normal was so hard i looked away so many times i wa slike. oog my god. end m i love it when walking around where there's other people makes me really nervous and irritable agoraphobia is great!

___: 

GOD yea It's so awkward for me I'm fine if I have a safe person or I'm walking to class but like

66ccff: i came back from class today and took a 6 hr nap cuz of my shame and agoraphobia

___: 

Rip Wish I could do that...

66ccff: well i haven't done my homework so

___: 

I just. Cry a lot NDKSJDJDNSKDNS rip me: I'm strong Me: spent the last 5 days like crying over nothing

66ccff: 

dkjle;ajd i mean... i used to cry but then i got mad at myself for crying so now i just Repress (tm) and sleep and then. the joke is that sometimes it doesn't work self harms... oops... that didn't work either better nap again

___: 

zz Pillows keep u safe Idk what I've been doing lately but I thought I was getting better til I realized I was like Abstaining from feeding myself BFBJSBFSJJFD

66ccff: o h my god

___: 

And I was like "oh fuck I'm a terrible person bc someone told me I should eat and j Didn't Do It I Failed Them"

66ccff: 

ahahahahaahahaha i thought i was getting better too but it was actually because i was just forcing myself to study to give myself an illusion of doing my part and then i went to school and my actual performance is like bad b/c i avoid so many activities that would make me better and i just

___: samd

66ccff: 

Wow i want to die!

___: 

hdjsjdjs

I think I only managed to eat cuz my brother was expecting me to

66ccff: tavpdfw you want to be punished constantly so you don't have to have anxiety about existing

___: 

Cuz he bought me dinner like 6 hours ago but I didn't touch it til now BFJDJD MEEEEE

66ccff: dkja;eljd;

___: 

GOD me: ah I feel good today Me like 3 hours later: oh my God I shouldn't feel good abt myself that's so Selfish ? I am trash

66ccff: oh Mood

___: Avpd solidarity

66ccff: 

honestly i love my environmental soicology class but liek it talks about how we're all consuming and putting things back into the environment

___: Idk how I manage to have avpd and __pd but that's how it is on ths bitch of an earth

66ccff: and i was literally contemplating if death was the only way to take myself out from the cycle

___: 

Me Bhhjsfjd

66ccff: 

i was like holy shit. it's not just consumption i forgot i also put bad gases into the air with everything i breathe i am Bad

___: 

All day today I was hearing abt what happened in Vegas and we were like. Talking in my apologetics class abt the Nature of Evil

66ccff: the true environmentalist take is death

___: And I was just thinking "why must I, exist if all I am is bad"

66ccff: 

oh my god same! i looked over my abt page and i was like this looks fake tumblerina

___: 

apologetics: so mankind is basically evil Me: great! I'll die so there's less evil in the world

66ccff: 

me ME

MEMEMMEMEMEMMEMEMEMEME

___: HHDHSBDJSHD

66ccff: 

sometimes i have fantasies of like going backwards and apologizing to everyone i've ever talked to and to everyone who ever had to work to produce what i've consumed

___: 

M. E

m

66ccff: 

and then hoping that they forget about me and then like disappearing forever i jsut can't see how some people can be like oh yeah factories in china and mexico earn less than 2 dollars an hour to make our stuff and not jus twant to kill themselves

___: 

I'm just pathetic and compulsive if I feel bad about stuff I apologize til like 2 weeks after God. Yea

66ccff: 

the joke is that people hate if you overapologize so you jsut damned if you do damned if you dont :upside_down:

___:

me: uh sorry for being sad People: don't apologize for that Me: Avpd:.  They are mad that I am apologizing also that I am sad Hhhfjjejd

Me: 

ME WKJD;LKD "can you stop saying sorry" "sorry"

___: 

me: oh God I'm so miserable Someone: oh im sorry Me: I wish I could accept this but Pity is too much for a lowly worm like me

66ccff: "what did i just say"

___: MMSNDNBHHHHHHGGGGG

66ccff: 

:smile: :gun:

MOOD

___: avpd feel when you don't deserve to be pitied ?

66ccff: pity is too much kindness ___: 

God yea

LIKE probably just a conflicted feel but I prefer ppl being active than pitying me but then I'm like

"that's selfish I don't deserve that ?"

66ccff: 

someone tells you to watch where you're going feel like you're unable to go outside for the rest of the day

___: 

m. mebdbdhdhdjs

66ccff: oh yeah the joke is that i want people to like. be kind to me but also i don't

___: hell brain

66ccff: so i can't say what i want

___: GGG YEAH

66ccff: 

be kind to me except don't because i'll feel invalid either way so maybe just don't talk to me >feels worse anyway

___: 

Hhhhhhhhhhh me Me: talk to me ? But I don't know what to talk abt ? But I am also not good enough for pity you could just sit there maybe But then the presence of another person will overwhlem me and I'll go cry again/s

66ccff: feel free to entertain yourself, and forget about me, ___: 

Mebdndmdkskdjsja god [looks at all cluster c disorders] you are all bitches and I hate tou

66ccff: 

tavpdfw u gotta depersonalize to make it through the day of talking to other people and acting like ur a normal human bean MOOD

___: GOD yea

66ccff: 

i have a question though if im depersonalizing why do i still feel terrible even if i feel ilke im fake smh

___: God me

66ccff: 

me: i'm not real so heres me acting like i am chill and cool person that is interesting maybe or maybe not me, inside: this sucks and i hate this but im not real so it shouldnt affect me but damn i hate this when u feel separate from your auto-pilot but you still experience all the shame you would without it :thinking: avpd is stupid and contradictory and evolutionarily useless

___: 

__pd isnkind of the same but like if you manage it well you can get stuff done but you still breakdown over the TINIEST DETAIL I hate it And I waste more time thinking abt what I'm gonna do and not actully DOING MT SHIT

66ccff: cripes

___: LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

66ccff:

me in high school UGH i'm ahving that problem right now dude in high school i used to just waste my days reading manga and thnking i should do my homeworka

___: 

me: I'll spend this hour scheduling [2hours later] Me: [stressed nbdjdjjsjdjsjdks

66ccff: and then i'd like. start at 10pm and fuck myself over ___: rip 66ccff: have a crying session at 4am every time an essay is due the next day ___: I actually didn't do one of my assignments tonight 66ccff: bad coping habits ___: Rip me I got discouraged over something lame JFJSNFKSNFD 66ccff: oh mood

___:

relationship issues: occur Me: well, I can't, do anything ever again

66ccff: 

i shouldn't even be discouraged abt my classes bc i'm here to learn and i'm just like. i know nothing i deserve to die kejd;kakejd friend, disagrees with you on something you feel unsure about: WELL I GUESS I AM BAD AND THEY HATE ME NOW time to ghost them

___: 

me: [perceives someone not caring for me] me: and Now...what is Mine Purpose...what do I live for...my Friends....have all abandoned m MEEEEEE avpd sounds super dramatic when you separate it from yourself but like In the moment I'm always just [jdut starts Fucking Crying

66ccff: 

i just want to manage to some kind of social work, give my wealth to some impoverished family, and then kms before 30

yeah my therapists in the past are like why... so soon

___: Jfjdjfjdf 66ccff: and i'm just like "why not i need to minimize all my ills on the world and also on the emotions of my family" ___: That reminds me of like. One of my mutuals talking abt how early he sleeps and he was just 66ccff: this is the optimal time look my life plan

___: 

"why be awake longer than necessary"

Hdhdhfjsjfdjdjdband. I was just . Me

66ccff:

because you hate yourself too much sleep :^)

___: 

God yea That's true. Me rn

I should've been asleep like an hour ago but [plays secret of Mana and then mopes]

66ccff:

dude i used to have bouts of insomnia b4 i got drugs that knock me out (and help me w/ anxiety) like.... i would lay awake and every second of being awake was just making the situation worse

___: I feel like I should get meds to balance out my bipolar eps but

66ccff: but then i couldn't sleep anyway so it was a damned situation ___: my parents r so anti meds 66ccff: rrghbh

___: 

also like Internalized ableism That I don't Needthem and So Many people don't need them

66ccff: oh yeah, why do my essay when i can read an hour of garbage romo manga and feel slightly less bad during that time and then hate myself more

___: 

So I Can do it cuz I'm like Everyone Else and not like Those "crazy" people Rifp

66ccff: 

man i don't wanna encourage meds if your side effects r bad but honestly how did i get the fuck through high school other than triggering intense anxiety about all assignments

like... i was so nonfunctional i shouldn't have even been in school

.....

66ccff: 

all accessibility problems are solvable humans are so bad

___: caring ? About others ? What a concept 66ccff: except sometimes they are good but that is definitely not me

___: 

Me

Ok I try to overcompensate w good to make up for inherent badness THANKS RELIGION

66ccff: 

the US is like: here's a pricetag for your life pay up

___: AAAA

66ccff: 

yeah i can see how christainity wouldn't help there w/ the "original sin" and stuff that doesn't quite exist in other abrahamic religions iirc judaism doesn't even have hell

___:  it's really weird

66ccff: 

i'm guessing its bc of jesus like.... y'all binches killed him so now this is life - christainity

___: 

Like. Christianity makes the most sense to me probably cuz I grew up w it but fuck Man

66ccff:  o yeah i grew up w/ some christianity too ___: It's FUCKED!!!!!! 66ccff:  i actually have agoraphobia issues w/ going inside of churches ___: Oh same 66ccff:  :^) ___: I'm actually fairly anti-church just because the current state of them is very bsd 66ccff:  oh yeah

....

66ccff: 

how can someone like me, who is literally not deserving of life, raise someone else

scrumbles

___:

Me Hdjehdsk

66ccff:  ___ we are so fucked ___: 

It's true Life is fucked We, are fucked

66ccff: existence is violence

[lunatheranter]

#5 Series: White People Are Evil!!!1!!

Yes, we are all evil. Every single person on the planet with pale skin is 100% Satan-born ignorant scum. Nice 👌 This rant is coming from several places. It's coming from my own experiences and perspective. It's coming from my POC friends who are tired of having oppression prescribed to them. Who are as tired as I am with their white friends being attacked for disgreeing or agreeing or just showing up to the party. It's coming from a place that's unplugged from the fucking matrix. This rant is largely anecdotal, because it's also personal, but who doesn't love a good anecdote? Or ten. 1. "Why don't you just leave then?" Recently in the comments of some or another Facebook post, a (white) girl made a joke about the US being a mess. Somebody subreplied that she should just leave, if she hated it so much. This girl came back like lol I'm from Hungary idk what you're talking about. Because some white people AREN'T AMERICAN!! ISN'T THAT AMAZING!!!! This is sale point one of this rant. Europe is hella white. Some white people, would you believe, were born in largely POC countries. Would you believe!! There are all types of people everywhere!! NOT ALL WHITE PEOPLE ARE AMERICAN ISN'T THAT INCREDIBLE!!!!!! 2. You White People™ Again in the Facebook comments (notorious for The Discourse™). I watched a clip from a film in which an African guy had taken artefacts from a museum & was on trial, arguing that he had not stolen them because they had been stolen from Africa in the first place. (If anybody knows what film this is hmu bc I lowkey wanna watch it). I noticed in the comments an ongoing (in some places surprisingly civil) intersectional debate about the ownership of art, with even many native Africans suggesting that the art should stay in the museum because art belongs to everybody. I commented on this discussion: [I'm not sure how I feel about this perspective. It's interesting to see the contrasting views across race lines in the comments. "Does anything ever really belong to anybody?" It's a curious thought.] This was my entire comment. I did not state an opinion. I expressed my interest in a discussion. The tirade of abuse I was subject to was unreal. One person subreplied with an entire rant, condensing me to an Evil White Person™, accusing me of ignoring historical fact and trying to blot out Black culture. The main catcher? My name is Luna Kwon. It is a Korean name. In my profile picture, my face is mostly obscured. This person had no reason to assume that I am white. And I didn't express an opinion. I was on an endeavour to educate myself on the opinions of others. I literally got dragged for thinking. 3. Yes it's Facebook again. This is the article which largely prompted my writing this rant this morning. You can read it here: http://afropunk.com/2017/07/white-friends-comes-trauma-im-not-willing-deal-anymore/ A few things to note: it's on Afropunk which is a POC forum, and while I understand that this is a POC space, the headline is nonetheless inflammatory. Secondly, it is one person's experience. One American person's experience in a Southern state and we all know what they're famous for. I read the article. I read the article and spent the whole time thinking "What? Really? Who does that??" Because I certainly wouldn't even consider behaving like any of the situations this person describes, and I don't know anybody who would, either. Maybe it's because I grew up in a metropolitan area, went to a metropolitan school, and have all of about 3 white friends. Maybe it's because I view every individual as an individual and I cannot comprehend judging person B, C and D based on person A's behaviour. Before anybody starts going off like we're in the Facebook comments, I'm not trying to invalidate this woman's experience. I hope she would not try to invalidate mine. What she's dealt with is what she's dealt with and if other people identify, that's their experience. Nonetheless this view (the inflammatory nature of the writing, not the content) is grotesquely separational (as somebody got dragged hard in the comments for pointing out) bc if my POC friends suddenly dropped me because I'm white (not only would I have no friends but) I would be very upset. I would want to understand exactly what I did to offend them. I would want to correct that behaviour. But I'm sure that this would never happen because, as I've said, I cannot imagine behaving in any of the ways the author of the article described and I would say to her: those people are not your friends. And it's not because they're white, it's because they're ignorant bigots. What you want to say is "having bigoted, ignorant, racist friends is a trauma I'm not willing to deal with". Because I'm from the UK. I live in a metropolis. My closest friends consist of: one Yemeni Muslim, one Punjab Indian, one mixed-race British-White/Indian, one Caribbean, one Korean (born and raised), one Chinese, one White with untraceable lineage and one White-British. I have no concept of racial sterotyping. Disrespecting another culture is completely alien behaviour to me. I've spent my whole life trying to understand and integrate into other cultures, to cultivate a greater understanding of my friends' backgrounds, to gain a deep comprehension of what it means to be culturally respectful. Because I grew up in this metropolitan environment, it is second nature. I don't even think about it. I also want to point out that the person in point 2 decided that I can "probably trace my lineage down through many generations" so let me clear that up *just incase she's watching*: my family (father's side, my legal family name) originates from German war refugees. I can trace my lineage back to the First World War, because my surname was fake from the moment they hit dry land. My mother is from a closed adoption. I have no freakin idea where I come from. As opposed to some of my friends, who can trace back to their great x16 grandmother's neighbour's uncle's cat's second cousin because they are descended from migrants. But yeah you looked at my skin tone in bright sunlight and determined that you know everything about me. So how about you take a fucking seat. When I hear "white people" I hear "yeah, you". When that finger is pointing, you better be damn clear who you're pointing it at because I am sick of being shamed for my skin colour and I am sick of feeling ashamed. I am Welsh. We have a rich history and culture dating back to the ancient Celts - can I not celebrate that, because it's a white culture? Empowerment is one thing, and I'm all for it. I hate that many POC suffer on a daily basis, I can't comprehend it, we should all be equal and free to seek happiness. But shaming people you don't know based on their skin tone is (racist and) not born from a desire for empowerment, it comes from a place of anger-fuelled supremacy. When I hear "white people are evil" I hear "I am not capable of rational thought". I hear "I think I'm the centre of the universe and everybody shares my experience and view". Shaming others is not the path to empowerment. We've already established this argument within feminism: tearing down other women does not make you an empowered woman. Well tearing down other people does not make you an empowered person. It makes you a bigot. You attack me for something Person A did, that makes you the same as Person A. Go yell in the mirror.