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savemeafruitjuice · 7 months ago

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if you’re open to it, anything with lee 2012 leo?? thank you :3

YAY! I looove 2012 Leo, and I really hope I was able to do him justice! He is so traumatized, poor child.

THIS IS SET NEAR THE END OF SEASON 4! IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED PAST THAT POINT BE AWARE OF SPOILERS!!

Lee! Leonardo

Ler! Master Splinter

TW!: DEPRESSION, FEELINGS OF WORTHLESSNESS (Dw, things get better! 😘)

'Something is wrong with my boys.'

The sad realization hit Splinter with a harsh blow. His children, as he has noticed, didn't have the same spark in their eyes, the same lighthearted goofiness and child-like immaturity they once had- and hadn't for a while.

This was exceptionally noticable in his eldest son, Leonardo. After countless horrors and freakish battles, Leo's face had turned stony, and his personality dry. His brothers were in a similar state, though the grayness in the leader's face couldn't go unnoticed.

This had become more apparent when he had relocated his stack of 'Space Heroes' DVDs to his bedroom, and hadn't taken them out for weeks. All he did in his free time was train, lecture his brothers, or stare off into space, a dull look of shame in his eyes.

Splinter had noticed this, of course. Something so drastic in their energy was very hard to miss, but he had thought it as a maturity settling over them, rather than a deep numbness hanging over their heads.

Something had to be done.

Later that day, his boys had returned home, all irritable and tired. Leonardo had kept his swords on his back, seemingly preparing for another home invasion or something of the sort. They had all eaten, and were scattered about the lair until it was time to go to sleep.

The katana-wielding teen stayed seated on the couch, as he had for many nights, gazing into the distance instead of going to bed. Unbeknownst to him, however, his father was aware of his poor resting schedule, but had left him to his thoughts, knowing that the things he had seen took time to process.

Tonight, though, the turtle seemed more melancholic, picking at the skin of his finger as he sighed. Yoshi peered from the dojo, sensing the upset radiating off of him, and knew he had to act now, before his son's condition grew worse. He stepped out into the wide space of the common room and cleared his throat as to not startle the younger.

"My son, what troubles you?" It seemed his efforts to be unthreatening were futile, as Leo had nearly jumped out of his shell, scrambling to grab his swords with a yelp. Splinter's expression darkened at this, but he was quick to give reassurance.

"It is alright, Leonardo. You are safe." The turtle's shoulders relaxed, and he voiced his relief. "Oh, it's just you, sensei. I'm fine, don't worry about me." His dad shook his head, making his way over to his son and sitting beside him, ears pressed to his head in concern.

"You have given me reason to worry, I am afraid. You and your brothers seem so disturbed, so I thought I would confront you about it." Well, that sure caught him off guard. Leo shrugged, struggling to hold eye contact as he muttered an explanation. "I'm just tired. We all are."

At the quirked brow of his rat father, his walls crumbled.

Leo sighed. "We've just seen so many things.. Things we can't unsee, unhear, or unlive, for that matter." he shook his head sadly. "It makes things hard, Sensei. Really hard."

Splinter's gaze softened. He should have guessed. His children, very early in their years, had seen more than he had in his entire life. They'd been across the world, the universe, heck- they'd even been to different dimensions and stopped wars. It was no wonder they were so void.

Yoshi's heart ached for his child, and he held his arms out to him, which, after a moment of shock and hesitation, was accepted. The eldest son let out an uneven breath, and closed his eyes, enjoying the physical affection he did not receive very often. "I love you, Leonardo, and I am proud."

That sure got the tears flowing. Next thing he knew, the rat father held his weeping turtle son in his arms, holding back tears himself. He rubbed the young boy's scarred shell, allowing him to express himself after putting on a brave face for his family for so long.

Eventually, the teen's tears ran out, and his tight grip on his father's kimoto loosened. The overburdened turtle wiped his eyes, standing from his spot on the couch, followed closely by Splinter. A worried look crept onto his face again. "Sensei, what if I can't protect them.. What if I'm not good enough..?"

"Hmph." His father cut him off before he could spiral into a 'not good enough' mindset. He thought for a moment, eventually asking a question. "Leonardo. A wise man, who I believe went by the name of Ralph Emerson, once said, "The best lightning rod for your protection is your own spine.". What do you think he meant by this?"

Leo blinked, and pondered for a moment, repeating the words to himself until he decided on an answer. "Huh. Well, I know a lightning rod is supposed to protect homes from lightning, and.. I guess our spine represents ourselves as an individual, and it supports us.. I- I guess it could mean that we need to face some things on our own.. and be our own protection!"

He looked up hopefully, and was rewarded with an impressed smile. "Very good, Leonardo. So as you have said, there are some things that you cannot rely on others for, and so they are not responsible for you in that time, yes?"

Understanding flooded over Leo, and he bowed. "Hai, Sensei. I get it now. I cannot worry about my brothers all the time, or they will fail to grow and learn on their own."

"Wehell, you certainly can worry about them. What do you think I do most of the day?" Splinter chuckled. "No, but you must not intervene and take control of their lives in a way that jeopardizes their independence."

The leader in blue smiled, performing another respectful, albeit smaller bow, and listened to more of his father's intel. Well, at least it seemed like intel at first.

"One last thing. There is another saying I know of, this one relevant to young leaders such as yourself.." The smaller looked intrigued, not taking notice of the unusually playful glint in Splinter's eyes, and hardly suspecting a thing when he knelt down to his level to speak. He did however, find himself concerned with the fact that in a blink of an eye, he had been flipped over and lied back down on the couch, his legs under the weight of a 6-foot mutant rat.

Seeing his son so unhappy over the past few months, mental health at a clear decline, had concerned Splinter greatly. He was so used to the bright smiles he wore, and his efforts to be a great leader, though it became more apparent that the latter was overtaking his mind, and he planned to stop that constant strive to be perfect, at least for a little while. "Laughter cures all."

Before the turtle could gasp out a question as to why this was happening, or better yet, what was happening, sharp claws were gently dragging down his plastron. Leo squealed, practically convulsing as soon as the fingers made contact.

"GAHahaha! S-Sensehei, whahahat?-" Leo was in shock. His father, who had so scarcely given approval, or physical affection, had not only hugged him, but had him pinned underneath himself and was tickling him.

It didn't matter whether he processed it or not, as Splinter had dug under his arms, leaving him to screech in mirth, gravelly voice straining with giggles. His father only smirked at him, glad to hear laughter coming from someone who needed it so much.

As young children, the turtles had played various games, chase being one of the most common, and discovered the concept of being 'ticklish' when their father had caught them, picking each up respectively and squeezing their sides a few times before carrying on with the game. After that, they went on a craze, chasing each other around and exploring tickle spots, an activity that carried on throughout the years.

Splinter had found it adorable, watching with a soft look on his face as his children tussled, and was glad to see that over time they hadn't grown out of such a lighthearted thing. It became rarer, yes, but they had something to do that showed they were still just kids, despite their mutated bodies and home in the sewers.

Over the years, as Splinter had noticed, it became obvious that the oldest son was the most sensitive, to which his brothers took great joy in exploiting. A poke to the side was enough to get him giggling, and Yoshi had had to take precautions to ensure that this wasn't used against him during training after losing five times in a row because of it.

A loud snort from the teen pulled him out of his thoughts, a growing pink tinge on his face clashing greatly with his green complexion. Splinter chuckled, using one hand to scribble into his son's neck, clawed fingers proving to be an advantage when he quickly tried to duck his head down, then throwing it back in loud giggles when the back of his neck was targeted.

"My son, I don't believe there is anything funny here. I ask that you explain what you are laughing about." Leo tried to reach up to grab onto his father's wrist, but a taze to his ribs left both of his arms uselessly pressed against his torso, trying to wrap them around himself to protect his more ticklish spots.

His ankles dug into the cushions beneath them, unable to squirm away from the offending fingers as they slid past his defenses, scratching along his belly. "Sehehensei, I- EEK! IHI CAhahan't!"

Splinter smiled fondly down at his child, taking notice in how little he actually tried to stop him, clearly needing to get out of his head for a while. Leo jolted up for a moment, curling over his father's hands before tearing his arms away from himself, opting to grip at the pillows of the couch. He tossed his head to the side, lost in giggles.

Yoshi raised his eyebrows, thoroughly amused at how he opened himself up. He scribbled over the expanse of his plastron, resulting in louder and more frantic giggles. "Oh? Leonardo, are you trying to tell me something?" He tapped at the exposed cartilage of the turtle's sides, having to pause for a moment before continuing, as the boy screeched, flinching away in reflex, before falling into cackles.

"NAHAHAHAH! FAHATHER- AHA! PLEHEASE, IHI-" Words were failing him, barely able to articulate anything before being interrupted by his own snorting. Not that he was trying to protest, or anything. In reality, he was having the time of his life, forgetting his troubles and getting the chance to laugh.

Sure, the gentle tickling was driving him up the wall, but he was enjoying himself. Still, after a couple minutes, his eyes began to droop, still quietly giggling to himself. Splinter took notice of this, and gave him one last squeeze to the sides, before picking the worn out teen up, cradling him as he had many years ago, and brought him to his room.

After gently settling him onto his bed, Yoshi covered the nearly-passed out form with his blanket, and softly held his shoulder. "You are a wonderful leader, and your brothers and I love you."

His consciousness slipping away, Leo responded in a quiet tone. "Thanks.. Father. Love 'ya guys too.." And with that, he fell asleep, a warm smile on his tired face.

Yippee, the sillies! 💙 💙 💙 This is longer than I thought it would be, but I'm not mad! Thank you all for your support, and I hope you enjoyed!

#Totally not me searching up random quotes #Then saw that one and found a way to incorporate it 😤#tmnt tickle #tmnt 2012 tickle #Lee Leo #Lee Leo TMNT #Ler Splinter #Ler Master Splinter

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skellakakella · 6 months ago

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sometimes I feel like two different people. (Rant)

Before you go diagnosing me with random shit; I’ve done so much research on so many things but haven’t found anything that matches my “condition”. Things like BPD and DID etc.

So overall, I’d say I’m not that great of a person. I’m selfish, rude, stubborn, picky, spoiled, judgmental, and overall a terrible vibe ngl. Now, heres where it gets tricky, because that’s only when I’m in a bad mood. When I’m upset, I’m UPSET.

When I’m content, happy, or just not feeling negative? I’m pretty nice. I can share things I have. I won’t be too critical or rude about most things. If you feed me poorly made food or something, I’ll eat it and be grateful. And I’m just pretty chill in general. I love who I am when I’m happy. I’m lovely when I’m happy.

But again, when I’m upset I almost become someone else. Someone who I wouldn’t spend time with. Someone who I’d hit upside the head with a metal baseball bat. It’s demoralizing and almost dehumanizing. I feel like a shell of myself when upset. Like a caricature of myself created by taking all my bad qualities and then shaping them to look like a human.

I’ve always said I had a bad temper but now I’m thinking I could have a condition. I’ve thought about myself being Bipolar, but I don’t have any manic episodes or hypomanic anything. Honestly it pisses me off. I’ve searched and searched the internet with all my questions about this subject but no answer. No solution. No help.

the only “answer” I’ve found is that I’m just a bad person. WHICH IS POSSIBLE. In fact, it’s highly probable. my morals have always been questionable. My motives have been extremely selfish before. My thought processes and justifications for mistakes and bad actions have always been quick to show up. I’ve defended things and people, that I shouldn’t have. I know I’m not a good person, but to know I’m a bad person is entirely different. It’s hard to come to terms with.

But at every condition I research, I always find things that don’t line up with my experience being this way.

I would like therapy, but a few things:

I’m too embarrassed to ask for it (I can’t afford it by myself, and admitting I need it is seen in my brain as admitting I’m a horrible abusive human or something.)

I’m probably too stubborn and not ready to change. It would be wasted money.

I’m scared of being wrong about having brain problems and I’m instead just a bad person, therapist seeing that and telling me that I’m wrong, then I take it to heart that I’m just horrible and one thing leading to another, I wind up doing something drastic and more terrible.

I just

I need someone to connect to and I don’t have that.

I’m not a suicidal person but when I get down in the dumps, I sometimes wish I wasn’t born. It’s depressing but it feels right to think that about myself because I don’t like bad people. And I’m a bad person. Idk. I need to get this out of my system before I take it out on someone I care about. Because if I do, I’ll then try to justify it and make it not my fault, when it is.

I strayed wayyy off topic but oh well. If you’re reading this, I hope you have a better day than I do lol

goodbye for now. I’m done writing.

#mental health #rant post #tw self deprecation #cw vent #cw sui mention #cw #tw selfhate #tw depressing stuff

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ghostofhallownest · 3 years ago

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everything everywhere all at once thoughts (NOT spoiler free)

i’m not a movie-goer. i think i’ve seen 3 total movies since 2020, including pre-pandemic, in theaters. before that, i only went if my friends wanted to go.

i went to see everything everywhere all at once due to a random retweet of a neil gaiman tweet from april 17 about how you should absolutely see this movie in theaters if at all possible, knowing nothing about it if given the chance. it leaves theaters near me on thursday, and there was a late-night showing yesterday, which is my favorite kind of showing to attend, so, hey. why not? um.

bruh.

the core of everything everywhere all at once being, simultaneously: 1. one of the best visualizations of a queer kid’s mental health (the freaking bagel being built to hold the weight of everything she saw in the world so she could see if she “could finally die?” because she wanted the pain to stop?? her masking that pain constantly under a colorfully nihilistic exterior when it’s profoundly miserable to bear and she desperately hopes, in part, that someone [her mom] will face this “absolute truth” with her and show her a different way to view it/live it/bear it?) 2. one of my favorite depictions of the complex relationship between a child + their parents ive seen in visual media (”i love them, i want them to love me,they hurt me trying to love and i hurt them back on purpose and i don’t know how to compromise to make this possible [because i haven’t realized compromise is even necessary]” going both ways); the fact that evelyn sincerely fucked up not just her relationships, but also the lives of her daughter + husband, and that despite that the consistent narrative thread through the whole of the movie is “im taking drastic action because you arent listening to anything else, but i just want us to talk“ 3. honestly the interwoven-ness of it all is part of what gives it its brilliance, that the evelyn we follow needs the perspectives of all these fragmented could-have-beens to broaden her own internal perspective, which allows her to reach out to her family and make the best of all of those paths for the life that she has. i also adore how well they portrayed the seductiveness of joy’s nihilism + depression bc!! yeah! that’s what it’s like! and how waymond’s core philosophy: yes, life is cruel, but i choose the beauty and the small joys and kindness anyway, because this world won’t make me hard, is consistently seen as weak and silly until, like...

honestly, i think that’s the hardest thing to do in this life. i think it’s a quiet resilience, but perhaps the strongest. + i adored that this movie seemed to agree. 4. the fact that even in her most “successful” lives, where if she’d done just one or two things differently the evelyn we follow knows she could have had all this---the fact that the movie takes the time to break down the difficulties that she has in these lives, or the joys in the ridiculous small lives; the fact that it’s always, no matter the measure of success, about the few glimpses where everything makes sense, and you’re never robbed of that no matter the size of the life you live if you’re willing to let those moments in...yeah. yeah. of course there’s so much more. the construction of the rock universe being voiceless, spoken in dialogue tags on the screen? i loved it. i also loved the font choice. the leitmotif in the fight scenes + the freaking hot dog universe with deirdre + at other junctures just.

+++

after i saw the movie, i went to burger king because it was one of the few places open at 1am near me. i ordered, and as i pulled forward, i realized (panicking), that i...had completely left my wallet at home. so i don’t peel out of line, because, i dunno, that feels rude...there’s only one car in front of me, anyway. i pull forward, and sheepishly, apologetically explain that i don’t have my wallet, have a good night, i’m very sorry. “oh, hey, you just had the large fries and the chicken sandwich, right?” the manager gives me a kind smile. “here ya go. have a good night.”

alpha wang says he’s trying to bring the world back to Before, “how do we get back?” <to before all this mess, before we didn’t trust our neighbors, before we were so cruel to each other, before before before> and the answer, the dorky, clueless, lost wang provides: be kind first. even if you doubt there will be kindness given back.

#everything everywhere all at once #platypus poison #jas jabbers #spoilers

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beatrice-otter · 4 years ago

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Heyyy I hope this isn't weird, but I just wanted to thank you for your addition on that post about global warming where you draw out (more clearly and succinctly than I've really seen put in layman's terms before (especially without undercutting importance)) how doable tackling climate change could be. You just put it very well and it managed to calm a panic attack I didn't know I was having. 10/10 post just wanted to thank you for it, I hope you have a beautiful day fam 💜

You're welcome! I get so frustrated by how doom-centered most rhetoric around the environment is. I get it; people are trying to scare the "global warming is a hoax" people into changing their minds. "Maybe if we scare them enough they'll stop saying it's a hoax!"

But the thing is, you can't scare someone with something they don't believe in. Climate change scares us, so we assume it's scary to everyone. And it isn't! That's like fundamentalist Christians whose main motivation is fear of hell going up to an atheist and telling them they're going to hell. The atheist doesn't care! The atheist is much more likely to think it's funny than be scared by it! It's not going to make the atheist go "oh, whoops, I believed the wrong thing this entire time, you're so right, I should convert to fundamentalist Christianity immediately!"

In the same way, there is absolutely no consequence of climate change that will convince a denier. You tell them the glaciers are melting, they'll say "no, they can't be melting because this specific one is growing by a teeny tiny amount, so hahahaha you're wrong!" And they're not just saying that, they absolutely believe in it. It is an article of faith with them.

You know who does get scared by all the focusing on the horrors of what will happen if we don't change our act and start fixing things? The people who care about the environment! The people who haven't bought into the big lie! And you know what that constant fearmongering does? Makes us depressed! You know what depressed people are shitty at? Organizing and working on a problem! So the doom-and-gloom focus (even when it's accurate on probable consequences if we don't drastically change things quickly) is actually counter-productive. It's not going to change the minds of the deniers, and it is going to discourage everyone else.

(Side note: the reason you hear so much focus on that, and not the stuff that is actually being done to make a difference, is the same reason Facebook's algorithm so heavily privileges stuff that outrages you--when you're upset, you're more likely to click that link and read the article, which boosts page views and advertising and the likelihood that you'll subscribe.)

So, you may ask, if we want to get the deniers to stop obstructing us, and scaring them isn't going to work, what should we do?

And the answer is, figure out a concrete way in which climate change is undeniably affecting the things they care about, and focus on that till you get them on board with a solution to that particular problem. So, for example, Stacey Abrams got Georgia to pass legislation on an environmental issue that focused on ameliorating climate change, with local Republican support, by not talking about climate change. Instead, she talked about the increase in property damage to homes and businesses along the coast due to a rising sea level and increased storm damage. Those Republicans still don't believe in climate change as a thing. But they do believe in the amount of money they and their constituents have spent to rebuild after storms, and how much that amount has increased in recent years.

But you can't do that if you're freaking out about our inevitable doom, or so depressed by it that you have no energy to do anything.

#environment

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blownbybakugou · 4 years ago

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I wanted to request separate of my words of encouragement and because I didn’t wanna ask of you too much; may I request Midoriya, Bakugo, Todoroki, Kirishima, and Tamaki with an s/o who struggles with bipolar disorder? (2/2)

Thanks! I saw the comforting message and I’m grateful that you took the time to tell me that.

S/o w/ Bipolar Disorder

Deku

He tries his best to be understanding,

And he doesn't take anything you say to heart when you're having a drastic mood swing.

He also knows to comfort you when you're in a depression,

Knowing that soon you'll be bouncing in excitement and joy makes him feel better,

Because he really likes seeing your smile.

Bakugou

He tries so hard not to fight with you when you get an angry mood swing,

But sometimes he can't help it and slips up on his efforts.

He tends to avoid you when you go through a depressive episode,

He just doesn't want you to know how soft he is when he sees you upset.

He always says that you being so energetic is annoying,

But he actually loves when you're like that.

Todoroki

He is very considerate about how to go about things.

Shouto lets you rant and rage whenever you get angry,

And he lets you cry on his shoulder when you go into depression.

He goes on a run with you when you get all energetic as well.

He has pretty much adjusted to all of your mood swings,

He might even try and place a schedule on them,

Like, see what algorithm they might have.

Oh, if only he knew that's not how it works.

Kirishima

He kinda panics whenever you get angry.

He has no fucking idea what to do when that happens, so he just waits it out.

He does know exactly how to comfort you when you randomly get sad though,

He is the best at making you feel better,

So you can count on him to be there when you're crying on the floor!

He also tries to meet your energy whenever you're a bouncing bundle of joy,

That way you don't feel alone when being a crackhead.

Tamaki

Literally cowers in a corner whenever you get angry.

Waits until you're done to ask for cuddles and love.

He probably cries with you whenever you have a depressive episode,

Because he knows that you probably feel really lonely right now.

He absolutely adores when you're energetic though!

Tamaki thinks you look so pretty that way

So innocent and happy.

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idiotic-genius · 4 years ago

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Hello!! I was wondering if you have any tips or advice for how to write a good "insanity" arc? A character I have goes through one and I want to do it right, yknow? If not that's ok, thank you if you do do one though :]

TW: Mentions of suicide, talking about mental illnesses and insanity

Thank you for the request, it's such an interesting topic! I found that there isn't that much information on it, but I'm glad to say that I'm pretty confident in what I did find. Anyways, let's get to it ^^

How to write an insanity arc

1. What is an insanity arc?

The first step to writing something is to understand it, so here is a quick definition that explains insanity itself, taken from Oxford Languages: "the state of being seriously mentally ill; madness/extreme foolishness or irrationality". Therefore, an insanity arc means that a character changes throughout the course of the story, descending into madness and irrationality. Sometimes, insanity is equated to certain mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, but personally, I wouldn't define it like that, at least not in fiction, because it could be confusing and also build harmful representation. To sum it up: An insanity arc means that the character slowly spirals into madness until they are mostly unrecognizable.

2. Symptoms of insanity (sorted by possible appearance)

Confusion/irritabbility

Extreme moods

Excessive fear or anxiety

Social withdrawal

Drastical change of eating and sleeping habits

Anger issues

Delusions/Hallucinations

Unability to cope

Suicidal thoughts

Denial

Physical problems

Substance abuse

3. What's the reason?

Insanity can be caused by heavy abuse, trauma, corruption, and also by experiencing mental illnesses that gravely impact the person's daily life (it has been discussed whether or not genetics have an impact as well, like in Alzheimers etc., but theory is yet to be proven). So, with all those overlapping symptoms, you can basically choose any reason for the insanity arc to happen, as long as you make it seem reasonable. Typical examples in fictions are:

Getting kidnapped by villains and corrupted

Turning against the system the character has originally chose to support because of betrayal

"Yandere-Symptom"

Something that could be hard about choosing a reason is the fact that as an author, you're probably trying to make your characters feel complex and realistic to the reader. So, if you haven't chosen why a character has an insanity arc, you should think about what would break them. Sometimes, the process of becoming insane is the arc itself, but, especially when it's not the main character experiencing the arc, sometimes it's about the process of noticing. In that case, maybe the character already went insane, but nobody knows yet and only slowly realizes because of the symptoms mentioned above, which means that the character could have a snap-scenario instead of a "slow burn". What's important is the knowledge of Where does the character start? and Where does the character end up? because the point of an arc is some kind of character development. It really depends on whether your character is going to end up broken and pale-skinned in a prison cell, happy as a psychopathic mafia boss or dead as the new "crazy" villain.

4. Writing from the character's perspective

Even though it could get tricky to only drop hints in the beginning that get more and more, it would probably be real fun to hide those little details and confusing the reader, because in the beginning they won't realize what's going on until they notice that they are the ones going insane with how they see the world, because they only viewed it from the character's eyes. Also, speaking as a reader, there is little greater than re-reading a story and finally noticing all the red flags and small hints, realizing Oh, that's what it means! One big advantage it has to write from the perspective of the character that goes insane is the illusion of clarity, especially when the character has been a reliable narrator so far. If the reader trusts their perspective, they can easily fall victim to believing anything they read without second thought. They might even think that the other characters are going insane! A huge aspect of insanity is a delusional view on the world, causing the symptoms mentioned earlier. The character will keep thinking that they are perfectly fine, or at least they'll be unsuspecting of what's to come. Their overreactions will seem normal, whereas the other characters could be portrayed as unbothered and therefore "weird". Their actions have to seem reasonable in their own mind, even though they do not follow moral codes. For example: An insane character would kill someone for being suspicious and "planning to murder them"- when they were really just trying to to some small talk.

5. Writing from someone else's perspective

If your to-be-insane character is not the main character, you will have to turn the whole thing explained in 4. around. The main character may notice all the symptoms from 2., but the question is: How do they deal with that and how do they react? Just from the symptoms, your character will probably not know what exactly is going on with the other, they might even suspect other mental illnesses, depending on what caused the beginning of the insanity arc. But there's probably going to be a moment of realization at some point. It could be because someone else tells your character "Hey by the way your friend's kinda insane" (unlikely), or, and this is what is more realistic, the insane character does something so out of the ordinary that the main character notices- whether that's an evil speech declaring war to all morals or them showing up by the villain's side fully depends on the story. In that case, the main character will only consciously notice the insanity arc when it has almost fully reached it's end. However, they will probably notice some things before that- like, to keep the example, the insane character being a lot more murderous than before.

6. Things an insane character might be doing (sorted by "heaviness")

Not getting social cues they used to get

Not understanding jokes

Reacting heavily to minor news

Feeling uncomfortable or annoyed around their friends

Binging/Having no appetite at all

Not liking the food they used to

Have depressed phases

Sleeping/being tired all the time or not sleeping at all

Developing insomnia

Getting overwhelmed by things they were fine with before

Getting angry easily and letting it out on other

Develop unhealthy coping mechanisms

Thinking more black-and-white

Ignoring obvious problems / their own mental state

Feeling nauseous, getting a migraine etc. all the time

Being paranoid and untrusting

Ignoring morals / only following their own

Not caring about consequences of illegal actions

Mad at system -> mad at individuals and vice versa

Find relief and happiness in their (sometimes) horrible and weird actions

That's it for this post! I hope this helps, and good luck writing your arcs and stories!

#writing #writing tips #writing advice #writing prompt #request #how to write #insanity #insanity arc #character tips #character advice

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arctickat2400 · 4 years ago

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Postpartum Insecurities <> Bucky Barnes

“She’s so beautiful,” You smiled down at your daughter in your arms. You laid in the bed in the med bay of the Avengers Compound, wrapped in Bucky’s arms as he sat behind you. He rubbed your arm softly as you both cooed over your newborn.

“Do you have a name yet?” Dr. Cho asked with a smile as she took your vitals. You looked up at Bucky in question. You had been talking about names probably since you found out you were pregnant. Though, you still didn’t know what was right. But, looking at your daughter now for the first time, both you and Bucky knew the perfect name.

“Sophie Rae... Sophie Rae Barnes.” You smiled up at Bucky, him returning the gesture. He kissed your forehead as you continued to adore your daughter.

* * *

“I’ll be right back.” You said to Bucky, gesturing to the front counter of the cafe, before standing from the booth.

“You want me to get you something, doll?” Bucky questioned. He was always so sweet like that, getting you anything you needed or wanted.

“It’s alright, babe. I got it.” Smiling, you kissed his cheek and walked back up to the counter. There was a new barista working the register today. Brooke must’ve had a day off.

“What can I get for you?” The woman, Caroline, offered.

“Can I get one of the chocolate chip brownies and a java chip frappe, please?” You asked with a smile.

“You sure about that?” She started, and you could hear a bit of judgment in her voice. “With that appetite, that extra weight isn’t going anywhere. Never gonna get that gorgeous model body back.” She states, and you could feel the tears build up. Before you got pregnant, you had the perfect body and you were a very well-known model. But, then, you had your daughter and your body never went back to the way it used to be. No matter how grateful you were for your daughter, nothing could change your insecurities.

“Um… well,” You hesitated. “Never mind, then.” And with that, you left back to your table. Bucky’s head snapped up, sensing you were close. It was kinda like a sixth sense for him. Which meant you couldn’t sneak up on him like you could with your other friends.

“Hey, baby. I thought you were gonna get something to eat.” Bucky wondered as you slid back into the booth across from him. You made eye contact with him and you could feel the sadness build up more and more.

“I, uh, changed my mind. But, um… could we actually go home?” You questioned. You saw Bucky’s expression change from adoration to concern.

“Yeah, sure.” He began as he followed your movements out of the booth. You started walking out of the cafe, and you could swear you saw the barista glare at you as you walked by. You sped out of the cafe and were almost 3 buildings down the street already when Bucky caught up to you, took your hand, and stopped you.

“Baby, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Bucky asked, more worry laced in his voice. A tear escaped your eye and you tried to turn away, but Bucky pulled you closer to him, his hand on your cheek. He turned your head to look at him and wiped the tears away.

"Y/N, talk to me. What’s going on?” Bucky questioned, his eyes glued to yours.

“That new girl at the counter... she told me that I was...” You sniffled as you said the word ‘fat’ under your breath. You didn’t want to say it, but that is what she was implying. You knew Bucky could hear you, his super serum allowing him to hear miles away probably.

Bucky didn’t know what to say. He just pulled you into his arms as you let a few more tears slip.

“Baby, it’s okay. Don’t cry. Let’s not make a big deal of this.” But, Bucky knew that, once she pulled away and looked up at him with that shocked look on her face, he had said the wrong thing.

“You don’t think this is a big deal?” You said, anger building up. You were speechless. Bucky opened his mouth to say something but you didn’t let him. You didn’t say anything else as you turned around and made your way back to your car. You got into the passenger’s seat, Bucky in the driver’s seat and you traveled back to the compound.

“Doll, I’m sorry. I just...”

“Don’t,” You said louder than intended. “Just don’t.” They didn’t speak for the rest of the drive to the compound.

Everyone knew you were insecure about your body. Ever since your pregnancy, you had to give up your modeling career and your body changed drastically.

You weren’t the skinny, beautiful girl Bucky had first fallen in love with. You didn’t think he’d want you anymore. But, he told you differently. He told you he had made a promise to always love you no matter what when he proposed to you. He promised that he’d always think you were as beautiful as he thought you to be when you first met. And you believed him, deep down.

But, other times, you would go through phases of depression and you would hate yourself. No one really understood, clearly. Everyone thought you were overreacting, as always. You hated your body now, there was extra weight everywhere. And no matter what Bucky told you, how beautiful you always were and always will be, you couldn’t help but hate yourself more.

You hated being mad at Bucky, but the person you loved more than anyone or anything, the one person you’d think would understand more than anyone thought it wasn’t a big deal. And, though he thinks whatever you’re going on about is complete nonsense, Bucky hates the distance between you two.

Later, in the afternoon, Steve decided to bring you and Bucky with him to meet a friend to pick up some stuff, weapons and such. As part of your job, you’re forced to talk to Bucky, as well as all the others. You’re not surprised Steve chose to bring Bucky, his best friend. Though it was quite obvious, Steve didn’t know you weren’t talking to each other, so he brought you too. You sat in the front seat of Steve’s Buggy, Bucky in the back, and Steve driving, of course. You pull up under a bridge behind a black car, belonging to Sharon Carter.

“I’ll be right back...” Steve says, getting out of the car, leaving you and Bucky alone. Everything is silent as you watch Steve converse with Sharon. You watch as she opens her trunk and you see several guns and Steve’s shield on the top of the pile.

Suddenly, “Can you move your seat up?” Bucky breaks the silence.

“No.” You answer without any emotion, just annoyance, keeping your eyes on the two blondes in front of you.

You can feel Bucky’s eyes on you, and you just barely feel the car move seconds later as he shifts over to the middle seat. You watch a smile form on Steve’s face as he leans into Sharon, and they share a passionate kiss. You didn’t know they were a thing. You were quite surprised, to be honest, considering Peggy’s funeral was just two days ago. But you thought it was sweet. Steve’s known Sharon for a while, it seems. You smile at the romance.

“Ya know, that could be us,” Bucky states and your smile falters, remembering your fight from just hours before. You stay silent. “I’m sorry, Y/N...”

But there was something in you that just wasn’t yet forgiving. You focus back on Steve and Sharon. She gets back in her car just as Steve made eye contact with you. You and Bucky smile at him as a light blush lit up Steve’s cheeks.

About 20 minutes later, you three make it back to the compound. You get out of the car and make your way inside. A smile lights up your face as you see your daughter running towards you, a huge smile on her face.

“Mommy!” She exclaims, running into your arms. You’ve only been gone about 2 hours, but she’s always excited when you get home.

“Hey, sweetheart. Did you have fun with Aunt Nat?” You asked her, kneeling down in front of her.

“Yeah! We colored and then she taught me how to load a gun.” Sophie answered. You chuckled nervously, not really knowing how to feel about that, considering she was 6 and wasn’t ready to be around guns.

“Oh, did she?” You met Nat’s eyes from across the room and she just shrugged with a smug smile. You looked back at your daughter.

“Well, I’m gonna go freshen up. Go say hi to Daddy.” You say just as Bucky walked through the door with Steve.

She looked over at her dad and Uncle Steve, a bigger smile growing on her lips.

“Daddy!” She squealed as she ran to him. You stood up and walked away through the halls and to your room.

“Hey, baby girl! How was your morning?” Buck smiles as he holds Sophie in his arms, her perched on his hip.

“It was good. Did you know that you always keep your gun on the safety until you are ready to use it?” Sophie states with a giggly smile.

Bucky chuckles at his daughter. “Yes, I did know that. But, I didn’t think you were ready to know that yet.” He glared at Natasha from the corner of his eye.

“Daddy, can you teach me something?” Sophie asks him as he sets her on her feet and kneels down in front of her.

“Of course, doll.” He says. She was always into reading and spelling, you think she got that from you. She likes to learn with Bucky, the daddy’s girl side of her. You would always find them around the apartment, reading easy-to-read books or him teaching her to spell or write or doing whatever she wanted to do.

After changing into a pair of jean shorts and one of Bucky’s sweatshirts that went past your shorts, just as you were walking out of your bathroom, you ran into Bucky. You looked up at him as he looked down at you with a pleading, sincere look in his eyes. You wanted to forgive him, you just couldn’t yet. You walked past him into your bedroom as he walked into the bathroom and closed the door. You grabbed your book and settled on the couch in your room by the window.

Bucky walked back out, shirtless and in gray sweatpants. You just had to look at your favorite outfit on him. You could never help yourself when he wasn’t wearing a shirt. He did it all the time too, knowing you loved it. He did it whenever there was no one in your apartment except you, him, and Sophie. That was almost all day, every day, always a nice sight to see.

He walked out of the room and you went back to reading, trying to focus. It was hard to focus back on something as simple as reading after seeing Bucky shirtless.

A little while later, you heard a loud squeaky laugh from the kitchen. You close your book, standing from your spot on the couch, you make your way quietly to the kitchen. You stood in the doorway, arms crossed over your chest, watching the sweet sight of your husband and daughter sitting on the kitchen floor in front of the fridge. Sophie sat in Bucky’s lap as they played around with the spelling letter magnets on the fridge. You couldn’t help but smile.

Bucky just finished teaching Sophie how to spell the word ‘perfect’. He told her to sound it out, first asking her what sound a cat makes.

Just then, Bucky looks up at you, and as your eyes meet, your face fell as fast as your smile came when you saw Bucky and Sophie together. You turn around and make your way back to your room.

“Hey, Soph, how about you go and wash up for dinner?” Bucky tells her, helping her up from his lap. “Okay, daddy.” She smiles, giggling as she runs off. He could never hold back a smile whenever she called him daddy. It would never get old for him.

Bucky made his way to his room, longing for his wife that he hasn’t talked to since that morning. He walks in quietly, careful not to scare her like he does more than he would like. He always found it cute how jumpy she was.

He finds his wife sitting on their bed, back facing him. He knew what she was doing. She didn’t have her phone or a book in her hands. She just sat there thinking like he found her doing a lot. Bucky climbs up behind her, pulling her hair back and placing a soft kiss on her neck.

“Bucky…” She starts.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry. I know how you are and how you feel about yourself and I just didn’t know what I was thinking.” Bucky interrupted her. He moved to sit beside her, taking her hand in his. “I’m sorry about what that woman said. If I had known, I would’ve done something about it.”

“I just thought… I thought you understood.” You told him, your voice quiet as you looked down at your hands, a tear slipping down your cheek.

“Y/N, baby, I do understand. I really do. The only reason I don’t think it’s a big deal is that I always see you the same in my eyes.” Bucky paused as he lifted your chin to look into his eyes. “You will always be and I will always see you as beautiful as you were when I first met you, no matter what. And I will always love you, baby.” He finished as he brushed his thumb against your cheek. He rid away some of the stray tears, though more kept coming. But, instead of the sad tears, they were happy tears.

“Besides, all of this,” he slid his hand up my shirt and set his hand on my belly. “It came from the birth of our baby girl. So, there’s no reason to feel insecure about it, baby. It’s a good thing.” He told you, leaning down and pressing a kiss to your belly.

“I love you so much, Buck.” You said as he came back up. You leaned in, your hand on the back of his neck. Your lips met in a sweet, loving kiss.

“Forever, Y/N. I love you.” He said, your foreheads pressed against each other.

Just then, you heard pots and pans banging against each other from the kitchen.

“I think our daughter is getting hungry.” You giggled, bringing a smile to Bucky’s lips. He couldn’t get enough of your smile or your laugh or your anything.

You stood up, ready to make whatever your daughter wanted.

“Y/N, can I just say one thing?” Bucky asked just before you turned the corner to your bedroom door. You turned towards him with a questionable expression.

“That cute ass of yours is not helping the way I feel right now. Especially since I haven’t touched you much today.” He states as he stood up and walked to you. His hands ran up your - his - sweatshirt and planted themselves on your bare waist. He felt you tense in his grasp. You still felt a little sensitive and insecure when he touched the places that held that extra bit of weight.

“Don’t worry, baby. Don’t feel insecure.” He whispered into your ear. “You’re so beautiful. Every inch, every bit of you, I can’t get enough.” Bucky finished. You looked up at him, a somewhat seductive smile on your lips. He leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. You felt his hand travel further down towards your ass and into your back pocket.

You leaned back a bit. “Dinner first, my love. Then, maybe we can do some of that later.” You told your husband. You loved watching him the way he was. You loved that he longed for you. You slid your hand into his and led him out to the kitchen where you find your daughter starting to put ingredients together for dinner. You knew she was going to take after Bucky in the cooking department. You and Bucky watched her, a smile on both your faces. You leaned into Bucky, one hand on his chest along with your head and his arm around your waist. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on your head.

Note: My apologies if I've missed changing any of the name "Katie" to "Y/N". I write my stories as myself and then change my name to Y/N once I put it on Tumblr. Please don't discriminate my writing if I did miss something here or on any of my future/ other stories. I don't mean to. Thanks for reading and I hope y'all like my stories!

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #Sebastian stan imagines #fluff #midsize reader

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cloveroctobers · 4 years ago

Note

i was wondering if you could do an imagine where olivia is sexually assaulted and after her behaviour around the house drastically changes until she eventually tells jordan + her parents? i just wanted to see a protective, baker family imagine that focused on her :))

TW: mentions of s******* assault, trauma, bodily fluids, college parties, panic attacks, depression, etc…

A/N: took me a minute to decide if I wanted to write this piece since it’s slightly triggering for myself and can be to others. Not overly detailed ofc but I hope when I do fully get back into writing we’ll have some happy moments to come! Especially for my girl Liv.

SOMETHINGS WRONG — O. Baker

Olivia Baker felt like she could make a list of what she can now label herself as which held negative connotations:

The pill popper

The drunk

That mixed girl

The other twin

The girl with no solid friends

The boyfriend-stealer

The wannabe woke girl

And now the victim

She couldn’t get her mind to grasp that. That this happened to her, that she let this happen to her. If she was in her right mind she would realize that this isn’t something she could ever blame herself for but she knew others would, if she ever let them know. But she wouldn’t, she couldn’t.

What was supposed to be a fun weekend in Atlanta turned into a moment she wouldn’t forget. It was all fun and games, it actually felt like the one true moment in time where she felt free and happy. Surrounded by good people with good intentions, which only consisted of Spencer, Jordan, and Simone. These were her main people, her right hands, and her go-to but that seemed to fade the night her life drastically changed—yet again.

The events that occurred that night were burned into her mind in spurts. Olivia couldn’t piece them all together but she knew. She knew something was wrong with the way that she felt even though she was dressed as if nothing occurred. She knew the moment she pulled herself off the floor in her own drool to look at herself in the mirror that something was wrong. She knew it in her appearance and in the way that she felt. Her confirmations were proven correct when she decided to use the bathroom, what she felt, and what she saw.

She was gagging and struggling to breathe. Olivia Baker knew something happened to her when she realized she woke up alone on the cold bathroom floor. She was doing so well and thought she was stronger than this, how could this be added to the things of what happened to her or what she allowed to happen to her? Her mind was weak, somewhere in the night she let her guard down and now she was here. It all felt like her fault.

What will they say about her now?

Olivia’s experienced a handful of trauma in her teenage life before but THIS…this was something else. She felt like she was going to pass out again until she found the strength to let the anxiety take its course in subsiding. Pushing herself up with a huge whimper and wince, she began searching the bathroom for her phone as it was not on her body. She remembered the first thing she wanted to do was document this because as soon as she got back to Simone’s aunt’s house she was going to wash away the filth she felt.

Perhaps that was another mistake but she couldn’t erase what she felt beneath and on her skin. It felt like Olivia was moving in slow motion searching the fancy bathroom, stumbling and shoving items out of the way in search of her device. When she slipped on something in the bathroom, she failed to catch herself, her cheek colliding with the tile floor, she knew that would leave another bruise along with the rest on her body. Her eyes connected with the object which looked to be covered in what appeared to be blood.

With a shaky finger she reached out to it, and recoiled back as her finger became coated in the copper stench. That’s when the tears began to cloud her vision and she wanted to cover her cries but she felt frozen, like she did hours prior. So she cried until her body ached internally and furthermore externally, and with a shaky breath those came to a halt when she heard something rattling.

She moved painfully slow, ripping the shower curtain back to see her phone tossed in the stone shower face down. Swallowing, she picked the phone up to see that the now missed call was from Jordan. She had over thirty missed calls and fifteen text messages. Blinking Olivia unlocked her phone and opened up her camera and angled her phone before hearing multiple shutter speeds.

At least that part of her mind was still functioning. She thought to herself bitterly as she went over to the mirror once again, setting her phone down on the counter to call a Uber back to Simone’s aunt’s house.

This was just another scar in her story, she guessed. So she rinsed her face, and gave Simone a call first…feeling as if this was the best option out of the three…when all she really wanted to do was call her mom.

“Olivia!” Simone greeted, “Girl, where the hell are you? Last night was so crazy and Jordan was trying to stalk you but realized you turned off your location, which he said is something you’d never do but I figured since you went off with Othello and them you would be fine.”

It took a minute for Olivia to respond. Her vision still locked on her reflection as that name sent something through her. Making her eyes close shut as she heard the voice introduce itself with that name but she couldn’t connect the face to it. However it seemed like Simone was familiar with who Olivia disappeared off with.

“I’m in a Uber on my way back to your aunt’s house.” Olivia knew she sounded like herself to Simone but her face was stoney and she did not feel like herself…as to be expected.

Simone nodded, “okay…cool! I’m glad you got back to one of us because we were getting a little worried.”

“Worried I’d relapse?” Olivia stated but cleared her throat knowing Simone didn’t deserve the brunt of her trauma, “Please tell me Jordan didn’t call our parents.”

Simone chose to ignore that, wishing later that she didn’t—however her and Olivia were still trying to build their relationship as in-laws so they were still feeling out each other’s temperaments and personalities, “No. I persuaded him not to…although I know that would have changed if you didn’t show up at some part today and I don’t blame him. Him and Spencer are getting a little stir-crazy without you. So please bring your butt here so my aunt can take us to this flea market she keeps going on about.”

“Alright,” Olivia breathed out a laugh that felt humorless to her, “I should be there in ten according to the ride but we all know down here in the south it’s really thirty minutes.”

“Tell me about it! It’s always ‘oh, it’s right down the street!’ But why we still driving tho?!” Simone laughed, “see you soon. I’ll let the boys know you’re on your way.”

And with that they ended the call.

Olivia shoved the clothes she worn that night back underneath her bed, still unwashed and out of sight. She went searching under her bed after her black oil pastel pencil slid off her bed. It was always in the back of her mind that the clothes rotted underneath the place where she lay her head. Sleep no longer existed to her but it’s not like a good portion of concealer didn’t help hide her puffy bags.

Olivia was violated going on about three weeks now and she was expected to go on like everything was okay. That was the challenge. And it was exhausting and moments throughout her day felt like someone would hold onto her throat and squeeze for minutes at a time.

She kept up with her therapy so that nothing about her seemed suspicious. She had thoughts about her pills and the thoughts about sipping alcohol made her stomach turn—so perhaps that part was a good thing. Her dad moved back into the house so the family dynamic was shifting yet again, her mom made it her mission to not have any booze in the house and any over the counter medication that was addressed to any of them in the house would be under only her and Billy’s care.

Those wouldn’t be strong enough for Olivia anyways, and that thought alone made her laugh bitterly but she was glad someone was taking the initiative to her health. Liv was not to have any access to it. It might not have been said but Olivia Baker always paid attention to everything.

She was doing well at hiding, almost flawless in her mind; that something had changed her life for the worse. Whereas with her pill popping/partying had been out in the open and her drinking was slightly undercover, Olivia thought she was doing well acting like her assault didn’t take place—yet the signs were there however it was cautious on how to approach. She had been careless, leaving her phone unlocked when she went off to the bathroom and with iPhone’s broadcasting your memories with photo’s was what lit the flame.

Laura was sitting at the island previously with Olivia while the boys were seated on the couch watching some game. She was sipping her voss water when Olivia’s phone let out the alert, which was closer to Laura’s view. At first Laura thought they were nudes but when she picked the phone up to click on the photo’s, she felt her heart drop to her stomach. A gasp unknowingly left her lips, causing Billy to look over his shoulder at his on-again wife.

“Laura, baby? Are you alright?”

Before she could say anything else Olivia walked back into the room, rubbing the hand cream further into her hands as she made her way over to her mom. When Laura snapped her head up to stare at her daughter, Olivia immediately stopped in her tracks feeling her mother’s eyes almost stinging her skin.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Olivia tilted her head to the side, wondering why the blonde woman appeared distraught.

Laura wanted to hold the phone up but felt a protectiveness come over her not wanting to gain the attention of the two men in the house, even though Billy already had his body turned sideways at the exchange.

“Olivia, what is this?” Laura whispered, pointing at the phone.

It didn’t dawn on Olivia right away what her mother could be possibly be talking about, in a sense she tried to forget but when she looked back at her art pieces, once she completed them in her sketch book, she realized unconsciously it’s not something you can just forget.

Laura swiped against Olivia’s phone at each picture making Olivia sharply turn her head to the side and swallow the lump that formed in her throat.

“Who’s in these images, Olivia?!” Laura didn’t mean to raise her voice, but she wanted answers.

Now she gained the attention of Jordan who broke his eyes away from the commercial playing on the television.

Olivia chewed on her chapped lips not wanting to say anything. She didn’t want anyone else adding this to their list of things to worry about when it came to her. It was ironic really, Olivia Baker was always involving herself in everyone else’s issues but pushed her own pain to the side. She vowed with Spencer that they would start to only worry about themselves this senior year and yet Olivia seemed to not do that. In a sense…she going to therapy, she was picking back up her old hobby to ease her mind but the huge problem about this was she wasn’t talking about it. To anyone.

“Olivia—

Laura seemed to take a different approach, using what she learned in family therapy to level her tone and to not make her daughter feel cornered. However she was highly concerned and she wanted to hear what she already suspected from these pictures. She kept her eyes trained on Olivia who reached out to the island to balance herself, now feeling the room spin. Laura pushed the bar stool back and went to Olivia’s aid but she flinched, ripping her body away from her mother which made Laura let out a small sob.

“What’s going on?” Billy asked, now getting to his feet.

Laura didn’t want to show Billy the pictures but with the way she was clutching Olivia’s phone to her chest made the man snatch the phone from his wife’s grasp.

Billy on the other hand was furious. He rubbed at his face and Olivia didn’t want to see the expression on his face so she kept her back to the both of them now. It was when Jordan towered over Olivia, hoping that he could get an answer out of her opposed to what their parents were failing to do, he didn’t touch her but he paid close attention to the way she was acting right now and how his father was trying not to scream in the kitchen.

Something was wrong. Jordan could feel it more than sense it from what his parents were demonstrating, and yeah they were twins but they haven’t radiated the same energy off the other since they were kids. And who’s to know that might have just been in their heads like many people tried to argue but Jordan and Olivia were extremely close as kids, they shared a whole womb together so they had to share more connections outside in the world too? Their bond was much stronger as children but they were making their way back to each other as they got older. Yes they were their own people but it’s undeniable if they said energy was never a factor in their relationship as twins.

Jordan was calm as he peered down into Olivia’s for eyes, patient, waiting for her to say what she willing to say. Everything was silent to her ears, Olivia blocked out Billy wheezing out his frustrations as he crouched down in front of the island and Laura’s cries.

Olivia felt so small.

Jordan knew before Spencer said something that Olivia was acting a little off. He tried to be better as a brother in paying attention to her as she always did for him. He was worried when she disappeared off with some kid named after Shakespeare that Simone used to spend summer’s with as a kid. Sure Simone said he and his friends were good people but they were also a year or two older, settling into the toxic part of college life. He was the last one with Olivia after they watched some performances with Spencer and Simone already on the dance floor with other people.

“You let Liv go off with these people we don’t even know?” Jordan remembers Spencer saying to him after he got off the dance floor.

Jordan didn’t like how Spencer said this to him so he replied back with, “you were just on the dance floor with someone you don’t know. None of us control my sister, Spence. She’s allowed to hang out with whoever she wants. Plus Simone says Oscar is good people.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know that man,” Spencer tried to come correct, “Simone said she only spent summers with othello,” He informed Jordan of the guy’s actual name which Jordan sucked his teeth at, “so that doesn’t mean she really knows him all that well either.”

“Are you trying to question my girl, right now?” Jordan furrowed his brows, always looking for a fight due to his impulsiveness.

Spencer raised his brows, “I’m not questioning nothing. I’m just stating the obvious. We don’t know nobody out here, we not from here. We just have to be smarter is all I’m sayin’.”

Jordan didn’t like to be wrong but he felt like he wasn’t completely wrong? Sure his big brother instincts should have kicked in stronger but he was too focused on some corny dude pushing up on Simone. That was a little foul now that he thought back on it, Olivia should have been just as important—and she is. Which is why he wanted to do right in the present.

He noticed before Layla pointed out a couple of times that Olivia was bringing out the darker fashion choices and that it was nice to see sometimes, since she “did it so well.” He noticed before Simone told him to tell Olivia that she would be over to help her straighten the back of her hair out and he noticed that she was wearing eyeliner in her waterline again.

He noticed the long showers and staying outside in the rain, he noticed she’s been slacking on her podcast and scribbling in her old sketch book. He noticed her listening to nothing but Fiona Apple, Billie Holiday, old Alicia Keys songs, and Fefe Dobson instead of her usual song choices like: Aaliyah, Jorja Smith, Billie Eilish, H.E.R., Doja Cat, and Mereba. He even fought with himself at night standing outside her closed door to say something. He did remember asking her one night at dinner, which she barely ate, if she was okay and with a smile that didn’t reach her rimmed eyes…she said she was.

To Olivia it was silent as she admitted her truth about what happened to her in Atlanta, but to the rest of the Baker’s it was loud and clear. Over the course of three weeks, she gathered it all. The memories came back when they needed to and the fact that he reached out to her twice since she returned home was appalling. Olivia didn’t know if it was the guilt—that might have been a stretch…she didn’t know the piece of shit of a person at all, the audacity, or the curiosity on his part to see what she was going to do about this. If anything. She gave no information away in the DM’s, in fact she barely sent anything back.

There was no weight that lifted from her chest as she spoke her secret into the air, she still felt pain that she tried to numb down but it just felt like another burden she inflicted on her loved ones and she hated that idea. That she caused this. Most days she felt numb but she knew anger was brewing along the horizon.

Jordan went to Olivia who stepped back, which felt like Jordan just got punched in the gut. And he’s taken a lot of hits before in his eighteen years of life but this one might have been the worse blow he’s experienced. And that’s coming from a guy still healing from a concussion.

“Oh, god. I’m so sorry, Liv I—.” She heard Her twin say to her but it sounded like she was under water.

Life has been that way for awhile now, if you truly asked her.

‘I don’t want pitty.’ Her inner thoughts hissed. That was last thing she wanted. She was now coming to terms that she wanted this emptiness to vanish, if that was what this even was. She wanted to be back to where she was or at least as a kid where she didn’t have to worry about a damn thing. She didn’t want to endure what she’s been feeling since she entered her teenage years. Olivia Baker wanted so much more out of this life but lately it seems as if her purpose was to only be handed out shitty lessons instead.

What lesson was this? To showcase how the world can take away anything it wanted and leave you to deal or not deal with the aftermath afterwards?

The anger was indeed setting in.

Olivia didn’t realize that eventually Jordan put his arms around her and she gripped onto him for dare life. Her body didn’t shrink into itself like it commonly did weeks after what happened whenever someone touched her.

Her parents kept their distance picking up on the fact that she didn’t want to be touched but her other half held onto her and that seemed to be a step in the right direction for now. Instead Billy and Laura held onto each other too, their heads whirling around with how to further provide the best possible care for their daughter.

#all american #all american imagine #all american fanfiction #all american cw #Olivia Baker #Olivia Baker x reader #Jordan baker #Jordan Baker x reader #Billy baker #laura baker #spencer james #Simone hicks #Layla keating

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cicissketchbook · 3 years ago

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Y’all wanna read my Apritello story?

So sometimes when my artistic drive is down, the writing bug will come bite me. I’ve been working on an Apritello story for awhile that currently has three chapters that are up on my Patreon. Eventually I’ll post it publicly, but I want my patrons to have early access. Anyway here’s an excerpt from the first chapter.

It’s kind of angsty.

The summary is, April invites Donnie to join her for a long weekend at the farmhouse, which sounds romantic until you consider that she’s been plagued with visions of his accidental death and is desperate to stop it from happening.

To say there was tension in the air was a drastic understatement. Truthfully, things had been tense for a while. Blame it on cabin fever, or perhaps they were outgrowing their sewer lair, but the brothers had been quick to jump down each other’s throats.

Leo was especially on edge, and not unlike how it had been since they were kids, his mood had set the tone for everyone else. One thing that differed from childhood though, was that he had been butting heads with Donnie, while Raph remained a mostly neutral third party.

There was the knowledge that they were getting older and they all had desires to get out there and live their own lives, and then the realization that doing so wasn’t really possible for them in the world they lived in. They wanted what any young adults would want, but they were mutants. The world still saw them as freaks. They couldn’t lead normal lives the way they wanted to. They knew this, they had known this all their lives. They had all been on the same page about it. They realized that living their lives in the sewer, at least most of it, was probably in the cards. April had always contested this idea, believing that the world would accept them in time. It’s not like people didn’t know mutants existed, but the turtles weren’t willing to take the risk. It’s not like they couldn’t go out and do things like they always had, but leaving the nest for good just wasn’t feasible. And they were content with this. The sewer was all they’d ever known. They’d always been together and they were happy to always be together.

But like all families, arguments were inevitable. Familiarity breeds contempt, after all. And they were accustom to bickering. But… it was different now. Leo seemed ready to explode at the drop of a pen, Raph never seemed to be able to find enough alone time, Donnie felt like he brought more to the table than the other three combined, and Mikey… sweet Mikey was such an incurable optimist that he sought to find the positive in every situation, but they knew he did this to mask his depression.

If asked what they were arguing about today, the simple answer would be that they were all just getting on each other’s nerves. Donnie couldn’t even remember how the argument started because they fought about trivial things so frequently, but he remembered the thing that Leo said that set him off.

“God, why is it so hard for you to just do your part? Why do we have to pick up your slack?”

Donnie was silent for a moment, almost unsure he’d heard correctly. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me, you never fucking help out with anything!” Leo’s tone implied that there was something else he was upset about that he wasn’t speaking of.

Donnie, by his best effort, kept his voice calm and composed. “I’m sorry, are you referring to three days ago when I didn’t help clean up the disaster in the kitchen because I was literally putting the microwave back together? Or perhaps last week when you left a mess for me to clean up that you all made while I wasn’t even here? And then you got mad when I didn’t?”

Leo seemed to get more aggravated at the mention of Donnie not being there, but continued on. “C’mon man, there are four of us that live here, it’s really not asking too much for everyone to help clean up around here.”

“Dude, I clean up after myself more than anyone. The difference is, when I make a mess, it’s in my lab rather than communal space and-“

“Oh, right, I forgot. The huge space you have that’s your’s. That none of us have.” Leo turned to their other brothers who sat near by. “Hey Raph, other than your tiny bedroom, do you have your own creative space that you can do whatever you want in? Mikey, how about you?”

Raph hadn’t spoken, but seemed invested in the exchange his brothers were having. It was impossible to tell who’s side he was on. Before Mikey could speak, Raph stopped him and said firmly, “Leave us out of this, man.”

“So now your mad at me… because of my lab?”

Leo paused, not making eye contact, before he huffed. “No.” He admitted quietly.

Normally, Donnie was used to these arguments making little or no sense, but Leo seemed genuinely angry and he couldn’t understand why.

“Bro, what is up?” He demanded. “Why are you actually so upset?”

“I just…” Leo started. Donnie could tell there was something he didn’t want to say. Leo crossed his arms and turned away from his brother. “I just want to know… where your priorities are.”

“My priorities?” Donnie was trying not to lose his patience. He had no idea where this was coming from nor where it was going. Which meant one of two things. Either there was something his brother wasn’t telling him, or this was in fact going no where. Like, this had started out a fight about cleaning duties, and now he’s talking about priorities. If Leo did have a point, he wanted him to hurry up and make it because this argument seemed like a waste of time.

“It just…” Leo blew another huff through his nose. “It just seems like… you are… distancing yourself from us, Donnie.”

This statement completely threw Don for a loop. He hadn’t expected that at all. “What in the world are you talking about?” He asked, truly bewildered by the turn in conversation. “Because I don’t want to clean up messes that aren’t mine? Like what the hell-?”

“No, obviously it’s not that. It’s alot of things.” Leo spoke quieter now, not as impassioned.

“Well, I would love to know what those things are, because I am completely lost here.”

“You never want to hang out with us anymore, and when you do, you act like you’d rather be doing anything else-“

Donnie cut him off with a humorless chuckle. “We’re brothers, we all get on each other’s nerves.”

“And I get that, but we do all still live together and we all need to contribute to the household chores, and you’ve just been acting like you are so far above doing any type of housework that doesn’t directly effect you.”

“Well, excuse me Leo, sorry if when it rains and the power get knocked out and I have to go topside by myself in the cold pouring rain to fix the power line, I don’t also want to have to mop up the leak in the kitchen when none of you did anything to help!”

“Okay, you keep bring up specific instances, but I’m talking about in general-“

“No, you’re talking alot of nonsense is what you’re doing!” Donnie’s lack of patience was starting to show. “First you’re mad that you think I don’t clean enough, then you’re mad that I have a lab and you don’t? Then you say I’m distancing myself from you all…?” Donnie stood and made a move like he was going to walk away. “If you have something to say, Leo, you better just say it because this whole conversation seems like a waste of time to me. It’s late and I’m tired, so make your point, or I’m going to bed.”

“Are you distancing yourself from us because of April?”

Donnie had already started walking away, as he didn’t expect Leo to actually have a point, so he was halted to a standstill at his words. “What does she have to do with anything?”

Leo looked away again, like he didn’t actually want to have this conversation. After a moment, he sighed and continued without making eye contact. “It just seems like… I mean… I thought we were all on the same page here. We’ve had this discussion, a long time ago. We aren’t…. Human. We’re getting older and it makes sense that we’d want to start living our own lives, but… we can’t. Not really. The world doesn’t accept us, so staying down here is just how it has to be. I thought we had agreed on that. That no matter what the world thought of us, no matter that we can’t lead normal lives, at least we all had each other. But… now it seems like you have other plans, Donnie.”

He finally looked at his brother and Donnie could see the emotions in his eyes. Nothing of what he said had been new information, of course. Donnie knew, painfully well, that the world saw them as freaks and being “normal” was not a luxury they’d ever be able to have. Alot of their friends were at the point where they were starting to branch off, which didn’t help. Karai and Shinigami were currently back in Japan. It was just a visit, but the kind of visit that lasted for a month or two. Casey had gotten a hockey scholarship for a different school than the one April attended. He was trying to go pro, so he poured all his time and attention into practicing. He still came around, but not like he used to. Mona Lisa had left Earth awhile ago, also with promise to return, but they hadn’t heard from her in a few weeks. They were sure it was just a new mission she had, but that didn’t make Raph feel any better. April was the only one who still came around all the time. With most of their enemies gone, everyone was moving on and it felt like the world didn’t need them anymore.

The pain in Leo’s voice would’ve normal made Donnie want to hug him, but it was the accusation that he couldn’t get over.

“Leo…” He gestured non threateningly with his hands. “Why are you acting like I’m not literally living down here in the sewers right along with you? And I still don’t see what April has to do with anything-”

“Okay, I’m going to jump in here.” Raph said unexpectedly. “Look, Dude, I know we don’t… we don’t say it enough but… we would be up schitts creek without a paddle without you.” He crossed the room to give Leo a lighthearted punch in the arm. “Wouldn’t we, Leo?”

“…Yeah.”

“So because of that, the idea of you leaving is…. It’s scary.” Raph admitted. He was going to say something else, but Donnie interrupted.

“I’m not going anywhere! What in the actually hell are you guys talking about?!”

Leo rolled his eyes, apparently getting annoyed again. “Don, can we please stop pretending like you’re not going to marry April and then move in with her?”

Donnie froze. To say they touched a nerve was an understatement. April was his best friend, but truthfully, it was very painful to be her friend sometimes. His feelings for her were still just as intense as ever, but for different reason now. In his youth, he’d maintained a kind of innocent hopefulness that they would someday be together, and he never even really thought of the details of how. He knew, even back then, that it wasn’t that simple and when he really thought about it, nothing about it made sense. Which is why he didn’t think about it. Now though, after some soul searching and dropping into a deep depression which he was starting to get better from, he’d resigned himself to the reality that she would never be with him. He’d accepted it, and told himself that it was enough to just be her friend. But the truth was, that pain never went away. They had such a close friendship, they had developed such a level of comfort with each other, but he knew it would never be enough. The idea of never seeing her again was unbearable, but to be so close to her, knowing that it was as close as he would ever get… it was torture. He didn’t care though, he just couldn’t let her go.

What really hurt was when she would talk about the next stage in her life. She was in school now, but with her grades and what she was studying, she could go anywhere. She wanted to travel, she spoke of it often. She never made any committal remarks about moving away, other than when she talked about the farmhouse and saying how expensive it is to live in the city. Her dad had signed the property over to her for tax reasons, and she would’ve inherited it anyway. She wanted to renovate it.

He was only vaguely aware that Raph and Leo were still talking.

“It’s not like we’re mad at you for finding love, that’s not it at all!” Raph was saying, obviously more concerned than Leo about ruffling his brother’s feathers. “It’s just, we need to be realistic about what would happen if you weren’t here.”

“Yeah, and the reality is, frankly, I think we all feel left behind by our friends, but we didn’t think our clan would be breaking up as well!” Leo threw his hands up, finally letting his true feelings out. “I mean, all we have is each other, we’re the last of the Hamato clan! I can’t let this clan die, I just can’t.”

“Why do you guys feel the need to do that?”

They stopped, taken aback by how low and serious Donnie’s voice was. He was done barking, he looked ready to bite.

“Do what?”

Donnie’s chest felt tight and he had to taken in a sharp breath through his nose to keep his cool. “Why do you guys feel the need to not only remind me of my unrequited feelings for my… our best friend… but now, you’re holding it against me?”

Raph looked concerned at first, but then sighed. “Donnie, c’mon, don’t act like you wouldn’t jump at the opportunity to get out of here. April isn’t going to stay in New York forever.”

The statement, while probably true, hurt to hear. “What does that have to do with me?” He said, quieter this time. “I can’t help what April does.”

“Dude, she is literally planning her future with you in it. Have you not noticed that?” Leo nearly screamed. “You have the opportunity to get out of here and do something with your life, and we’ll be-“

“No she’s not!” Donnie shouted back. “Are you guys smoking crack or something? Don’t say that shit to me! April doesn’t…” He paused, his words getting caught in his throat. “April doesn’t want me. I thought we’d been over this.”

Mikey, who hadn’t yet spoke, immediately picked up on how much pain Donnie was in. “Hey guys, let’s just drop it, yeah?”

Leo pressed on as if his youngest brother hadn’t spoken. “Maybe she didn’t five years ago, but she sure as shit does now.” He didn’t seem bothered by Donnie visible cringe. “I mean, dude, you’ve spent the night, alone at her house.”

“So has Mikey. And Raph once, I think.” Donnie said quietly, and Raph nodded in confirmation. “And she’s spent the night here a billion times, that doesn’t mean anything.”

“Mikey and Raph didn’t sleep in her bed.” Leo said accusingly.

“I did.”

They all paused and turned to the youngest brother. Raph spoke. “You did?”

“Every time I go over there, I sleep in her bed.” Mikey said matter-o-factly. “Whenever… whenever I’m sad, she let’s me come over and… she’ll listen. She doesn’t try to offer solutions, she doesn’t try and tell me things to make me feel better, she just… listens. And that’s what helps me the most. Then we watch funny videos.”

None of them commented at first. They all knew Mikey struggled with depression, but he rarely, if ever, talked about it. They all had told him at some point that they were there if he needed to talk, but he never came to any of them. One might of thought that hearing that his brother shared a bed with April might make Donnie jealous, but quite the opposite, it made him very happy and appreciative to hear about it. It made sense that Mikey would be more comfortable talking to April than to any of them, and to know that she had been there for him was comforting. Donnie wanted that for his brother.

“See?” He said finally, more to Leo than anyone else. “April… she’s there for all of us. She cares about all of us… I’m not special.”

“Donnie, don’t say that.” Mikey offered and rose from his seat to place a hand on his brother’s shoulder. Donnie placed his own hand over Mikey’s and squeezed it, staring at the floor. “She cares about you the most. More than you know.”

“Mikey, please, please don’t.” He said through his teeth. “I can’t… I can’t even believe we’re having this conversation right now. You know how long it took me to accept the fact that I was kidding myself by thinking there could ever be something between us? Of course you guys know, which is why it is so baffling to me that you feel the need to do this.”

“So if April wanted you to move away with her, you wouldn’t do it?”

Raph punched Leo in the arm again. It was a strange thing, to see Raph scold Leo for being insensitive. Donnie had had enough though.

“I’m out of here.” He turned on his heel and heading towards the turnstiles.

...............

Yes, it’s NSFW, of course it is.

#TMNT 2012 #apritello #donatello #leonardo #raphael #michelangelo #mikey #raph #leo #donnie #apriltello #tmnt #fanfiction

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jigensass · 3 years ago

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Now that 2022 is nearly here and I don’t think anything new that is going to drastically affect me in the next few days will occur, I guess it’s time to call out who helped me survive this year.

SURPRISE THERE ARE ACTUALLY PEOPLE ON THE LIST THIS YEAR

@majimasleftasscheek - The Fic about Majima fucking a cheeseburger should be on the New York Times best seller list. Also your art is adorable

@zoetheduckling I have never spoken to you but your art is awesome.

@bolontiku thanks for checking in on me

@maryellencarter & @mothnem for always liking my stuff no matter how trash it is.

I don’t remember their username but that one Yakuza blog who has an undying love for Okudera from Yakuza is gorgeous, please do not stop doing what you’re doing.

The majority of the Lupin the Third community for being accepting to my shenanigans and to the Ace Ace Attorney community liking my trashy screenshot content of gay lawyers.

As well as everyone else I forgot/didn’t list who I thought you were cool

With this in mind, these people as well as people in my real life, made me realize that I have unknown friends in places, I was just caught up in my own fantasy worlds and after a fallout with a group of unnamed people, it made me realize that I had to stop writing roleplays officially.

Stephen oh Stephen, you were my world for many years and kept me going, but the writing was on the wall when I began to diverge into other things that my passion for almost 7 years became an obsession. You were the heaviest chain I had to break when moving forward in life after the way 2021 had begun for me because I was so blinded by grief, depression, and rage that you still kept putting me down.

After playing FFVII remake and seeing the nature of Sephiroth, I threw you in the dumpster and began a new journey.

If you look deep enough into this blog I did delete a LOT of my old stuff, but the things I actually enjoyed reading they are there, buried for anyone’s reading pleasure. I am still planning to watch Multiverse of Madness because I want to see this through to the end of the line. It’s been a good run, my friend, but this is where we depart.

ALL THE LAWYERS

Listen- I called the Judgement sequel. Even though I played the first Ace Attorney at the end of 2020, I played (and have still yet to finish a few games) in 2021 and a lot of them were emotional and made me cry. Godot hit the hardest. Like have you HEARD his THEME???? https://youtu.be/34Zh0a08Gq8

youtube

IT’S SEX IN A COFFEE MUG

And I enjoyed my time with the Judgement sequel, despite its controversy. Even though at times I wanted to bang my head against the wall, Yagami carried himself well as being the voice of reason while still being able to have emotional depth. His rivalry with Kuwana was really a Holmes vs. Moriarty vibe

SPEAKING OF WHICH

If I had a nickel for the amount of times Sherlock Holmes was relevant in 2021, I would have two nickels which isn’t a lot but weird it happened twice

Kind of funny that these two stories kind of had the same plot where Watson died and left behind a daughter.

I could not have played Ace Attorney Chronicles if it was not for Holmes (Sholmes). It was boring as all heck.

This is Part 1 of my 2021 wrap up cause I am out of picture uploads

#out of the fiat #Youtube

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maplecornia · 3 years ago

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chapter 27

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 1.39K

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: so the continuous posting every day has now officially ended now that we have caught up in the story ^^ so be expecting updates every Saturday instead of every day lmao

The door opens before you have a chance to turn away.

You don't know why you're so scared, but you do know that being called in to meet the chairman of HYBE entertainment isn't necessarily a good thing. Especially when you haven't even started your first day yet.

Swallowing hard, you step forward, almost wanting to reach out and take Namjoon's hand. If you do, maybe then you have someone to lean on. Someone to help you not feel so afraid. However, his presence behind you offers you more than enough comfort and you take a breath, grateful that you have his moral support.

The door shutting tightly behind the two of you, you raise your eyes to find BangPD sitting at the head of the room, his chin resting on his hands. You pause in the doorway, waiting for his invitation to sit as he regards you with those small thoughtful eyes. Unable to stand the uncomfortable tension, you clear your throat.

"What's going on?" you murmur, your voice weak despite the attempt to strengthen it. BangPD smiles at your question and leans back in his chair, nodding slightly to Namjoon.

"Mrs. Lin, please take a seat." He requests, and Namjoon obliges, placing his hand on the small of your back to lead you to a small sofa set amid the massive office. As he sits you down, he takes your hand in his own before resting on the cushion next to you. Inwardly, you smile, feeling a bit of the fear ebbing away.

"Did I do something wrong?" You inquire, peering up at him as BangPD rests on the cool gray couch opposite of you.

"Of course not." He chuckles at your innocent question before leaning back in the chair and resting his face on his hand. As though he were measuring you up, making sure you fit his standards. You squirm a bit under his gaze, and Namjoon glares at him, his hold on your hand growing subconsciously tighter. "I simply wanted to ask you a question, a proposal if you will."

You bite your lip in nervous anticipation, regarding him with wary eyes. At your silence, his smile grows, and it makes you uncomfortable. Somehow, you know that you are not in control of the situation. Feeling that slip away, you don't know if you'll be able to conduct yourself properly.

After a moment, he leans forward and picks up a remote. He presses a button and a small speaker on the table crackles to life. There's a few moments of static before a voice fills the voice, and your heart pummels to your stomach.

Your voice.

Your blood turning cold, you look up at BangPD with wide eyes.

What is he going to do? Am I fired? Will Jaejin lose his job?

Turning to Namjoon, you try to read his expression, but he's focused solely on the chairman, his expression unreadable.

What does he think? Is he upset with me?

It's not even your first day, and already you're in deeper water than you signed up for.

"I--" you begin, but BangPD pauses the track and leans forward towards you, cutting you off.

"Is this you?" he murmurs. You wonder why he's asking a question, he already knows the answer to. Stunned, you don't answer him, and he smiles once more, leaning back. There's a moment of silence, as the two of you regard each other. One in confusion, the other in amusement.

Biting your bottom lip, you can't help but feel a bit indignant. Why is he playing with you? Is this some kind of game? You don't want to be a piece on his little chessboard.

Before you can open your mouth to respond, Namjoon brushes your cheek, gathering your attention. You flinch before turning to him, but he doesn't look fazed. Instead, his hand tightens around yours, and those solemn eyes bore into yours, calming you without so much as a second glance.

"Yen, you're talented. BangPD thinks so as well."

When he says those words, you can't help but feel a taste of bile rising in your throat. You bite your bottom lip, trying to keep yourself from hyperventilating, but when you see his face pass over Namjoon's kind eyes, it's hard not to. Your hand tightens, nails digging into your palm, as you try to calm yourself down, erase toxic memories that refuse to let you free.

"What?" you murmur, your voice hoarse and terrified.

"Ms. Lin, what I'm about to offer you is something that could drastically affect your life and the future of our company." Turning to the renowned chairman, you can hear the pounding of your heartbeat reverberating in your ears. You don’t notice the flash of remorse across Namjoon’s eyes, nor the way he tightens his jaw as soon as BangPD speaks. "So I want you to seriously consider before responding."

"What are you talking about?" you nearly snap, but he doesn't say anything more, just places a file on the table. He pushes it towards you, and though reluctantly, you draw your hand out of Namjoon's grip, pulling the file into your lap.

You regard BangPD with wary eyes before opening the file.

"What is this?" you murmur, squinting at the neatly printed Korean.

"A contract."

You balk, nearly dropping the papers in your lap as you look up at him. You can feel the fear growing tighter in the pit of your stomach, his voice coming back to haunt you once more. BangPD smiles at your silence, his eyes softening.

"Ms. Lin, I would like to sign you as a trainee. Underneath BigHit entertainment."

Your hand tightening around the document, you swallow hard.

"What?"

Not again, oh God please don't let it happen again.

"Yen, this is your dream isn't it?" Namjoon asks from beside you, his hand resting on your knee, an attempt to calm you down. Namjoon doesn’t know why he’s saying this, shouldn’t he be stopping you? Shouldn’t he be finding reasons so you could say no? But inwardly, he cannot stand to see your face change that way. He can’t stand to see you afraid. His heart aches every time he sees that look in your eyes.

BangPD catches the exchange, his eyes calculating and silent.

Interesting.

"You don't have to make a decision right now." He sighs resting his head on his hand once more. You look up at him, your eyes bare and vulnerable and he squints, intrigued. You may seem like an open book, but Bang Sihyuk can tell that there is more behind your innocence. He wonders if he wants to know what secrets they keep. "I'll give you a week to think it over."

Your mouth turning dry, you try not to show your relief. Maybe after a week, he'll forget. Maybe after a week, you won't be so interesting.

After all, it's not that hard to forget about me.

You try not to be bitter about the thought, but you can't help it. After all, Namjoon was right.

This is your dream.

Looking down at the contract, you grit your teeth as though that would make the lump in your throat disappear.

This was your dream.

So why did he have to ruin it?

After a moment, BangPD nods to Namjoon, and he stands. Tapping you softly on the shoulder, he pulls you up with him, your hands clinging onto the contract as though it were a lifeline. Concerned about your current condition, RM peers into your face. You look up at him with a blank gaze, as though something inside you had been fractured.

His eyes are expectant, waiting for a sign that you won't break down. Smiling weakly, you nod to him, and he grins back before taking you by the arm and guiding you out of the office.

"I want you to know," BangPD calls after you just as Namjoon's hand rests on the doorknob. You turn back to him, confused. He looks up at you from his chair, his hand massaging his temple as he regards you with those small cold calculating eyes. "I believe you have a gift."

You swallow at the words, somehow feeling small and insignificant. At your demeanor, Sihyuk narrows his eyes before sighing and turning away, dismissing you with a final farewell.

"It would be a shame to waste it."

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: what do you think she should do?

chapter 28 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

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veliseraptor · 3 years ago

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got tagged for two fic writer memes yesterday! the one from @ameliarating first:

How many works do you have on AO3?

509.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

3,432,24. dang! that’s a lot of words

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

I have written for...counting the MCU as one fandom, on AO3 I have written for 32 fandoms, including at least one work in:

MCU, The Sillmarillion, Caliban Leandros, both DC and Marvel Comics, the book Barebacked by Kit Whitfield, Doctrine of Labyrinths, Doctor Who, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Star Wars, Black Jewels, Dragon Age, Lucifer, Dexter, Temeraire, Gentleman Bastard Sequence, Supernatural, A Song of Ice and Fire, Greek Mythology, Lymond Chronicles, Merlin BBC, Code Geass, Good Omens, Death Note, and White Collar.

this is not a comprehensive list of every fandom I’ve ever written for, because it is not including ones that live only on FFN or Livejournal.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Life In Reverse tops the list (11066), aka my 200k Loki-centric post-Thor AU fic that I wrote between 2012 and 2018 and with which I have a decidedly complex relationship at this point. I love it but also I no longer think it’s my best work but also I credit it with teaching me a fuck of a lot about writing and writing longer projects in general.

With Absolute Splendor is rapidly catching up, to my astonishment (6559), despite having been posted for less than half as long. Aka the wedding planning fic that’s really just me mucking about in my Jiang Cheng and my Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian feelings, at length.

some good mistakes (4618) was my first foray into the Untamed version of “characters who hate each other going on resentful roadtrips together, feat. Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng.” I have gone on to write others and will continue to write more.

Unraveling (3069) is a little bit of a surprise but also not - it was originally just sort of WWP stuff for my ‘what if people remembered that blunt force trauma is a really bad thing actually’ problem that pops up sometimes, re: Loki at the end of The Avengers, and then it kind of turned into a whole thing. I personally think it’s the weakest of the installments of the series it belongs to, but it is the first one and also the one that gets least into the broader family dysfunction and depression stuff that probably is less everyone’s thing (but is what came out this fic that mattered more to me, personally).

I am a little surprised to see Steve Rogers’ Halfway House for Notorious Supervillains (3068) here too! I was expecting one of the more...idk, mainstream concepts from the MCU to win out? But I also wasn’t expecting two Untamed fics to make it here, either. But I am stupid proud of this fic even if it is very extraordinarily unfinished. This is one of those unfinished fics that will nag at me unless and until I finish it, at least a little, because the concept - if I do say so myself - is so goddamn good and I think I was executing it pretty well, too.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Pretty much never. I was never very good at it and now I’d feel like I had to go back and reply to all of them and I just. I can’t do that. and when I do try to just start at the beginning I get overwhelmed very fast and start avoiding it.

Basically I decided that if it’s a decision between wrestling with myself to reply to comments versus actually doing more writing I’m going to end up landing on the latter as feeling both more doable and more productive.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably it’s The Worlds Forgotten, the Words Forbidden for sheer level of “so then what was the point” of it all. but like. I’ve definitely written a few extraordinarily miserable fics, and by “a few” I kind of mean “a lot.” Other nominees I’d put down might be nor autumn falter (for currently personally making me suffer most), once there was a way to get back home (for I think having the ouchiest summary), and Waiting for the Summer Rain (which remains one of my personal favorite Supernatural fics I wrote).

but like. there are 43 fics I have marked with Major Character Death warnings and every single one of those, pretty much, has a downer ending.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written several though not in a long time! My craziest probably remains the Morgoth/Cthulhu short I wrote that actually got sporked because someone took it seriously (???) enough to do that. But the craziest that actually has any merit, (I’d argue) is probably the Maeglin/Viserys one.

not linking to either, if you want to go find them I don’t think it’ll be that hard.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yeah, a few times on a few different things. More if you count “people who seem to like the fic but love telling you how much they hate the female characters you’re writing about in it” as ‘hate’ which I would but isn’t, you know, quite as straightforward. If I had a nickel for every time someone bitched about Jane in Life in Reverse, though...lots of nickels.

Do you write smut? if so what kind?

Sure do! But what does ‘what kind’ mean, I don’t know how to answer that question. I feel tempted to just put in my “Mike’s Hard Kinks” image edit in this space.

I guess usually I tend to write smut that at least involves a little bit of a kink? I don’t think I’d feel comfortable writing entirely kinkless smut. I think I’d feel weird about it, the same way I do when I write really nice fic, generally.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think I did back when but I don’t remember anything about it. I feel like it was one of those mass data scraping things where my fic happened to be among those caught up in it.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! several actually, mostly into Russian and Chinese. every time it happens I’m immensely flattered that someone wants to put in that kind of work on something I wrote.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I think I’d be very, very bad at it.

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Depends on when you ask me! I could probably give you a top five but then I’d remember six that I forgot to mention five minutes later. I guess if I were to think about ships that feel like they hold very special particular places in my heart... Xue Yang/Xiao Xingchen, Steve Rogers/Loki, and Min/Rand come to mind.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

oh god do you want the whole list cause honestly I could just like. screencap the entirety of my “in progress” folder with a crying emoji watermarked over it. and that’s not getting into the fics that are like...half formed babies in my consciousness but not anywhere on paper.

and also I just hate to admit that I might not finish something.

you know what? the Lucifer/Good Omens crossover I started would’ve been a lot of fun. I’m probably never going to finish it, but it would’ve been great if I had. I know other people did it too but my contribution could’ve been amazing.

I can say this very boldly with the near certainty that I’m not going to finish the fic so no one will be able to disagree.

(...also the Last Herald-Mage fix it. that was going to be a good fic too, and also will probably languish unfinished forever.)

What are your writing strengths?

I’m pretty sure dialogue is my strongest point. Dialogue and emotions, which is why I always end up just wanting to write about characters talking and having feelings at each other.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing action sequences throws me into conniptions every time I have to do it and I will take drastic actions sometimes to avoid doing it at all, which probably weakens the work as a whole.

Also, I don’t plan ahead and this means I write myself into corners kind of a lot. If I wasn’t writing long, dense fic it wouldn’t be a problem but here we are.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I tend to avoid it unless it’s in the context of, as in CQL/MDZS fic, leaving certain terminology untranslated. I’m pretty sure I almost never write full exchanges of dialogue in a different language than I’m using for the narration within a fic, and generally speaking my reaction to other people doing it is at least mildly negative.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter was technically the first fandom I wrote for, but it was a crack fic I wrote to make my friends laugh more than anything; I tend to count Wheel of Time as my first actual fandom for which I wrote my first actual fic.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

some days the answer is “all of them” and some day the answer is “I don’t like anything I’ve written in my entire life” and I never like giving this a definitive answer. yesterday I reread efforts in a common cause (the bound copy!! thanks @spockandawe) and you know what, that was a good fic and I’m proud of it, so I’m going with that one, for this meme, today.

tagging: @mostfacinorous, @jaggedcliffs, @silvysartfulness, @mikkeneko, @kasasagi-eye, @curiosity-killed, how many people am I supposed to tag for this one anyway

#lise memes #confessions of a frustrated writer

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missmonsters2 · 5 years ago

Text

Between the Lines || VIII

PAIRING: Steve Rogers & Fem!Reader (Platonic) / Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader / Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader / Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader x Wanda Maximoff

Summary: Vampire AU. Life has changed drastically since the 1600s. Things are always on the move, and you’ve been very careful to not get on SHIELDs radar. Living on the down-low owning a café, you’re content to live out a quiet existence. That is until the Avengers enter your life.

[Set after the New York Invasion, in CAWS, and goes up to AoU. Canon divergent after.]

Warnings: This series will contain smut(**), poly-relationship, and dark themes.

Note: Me, coming out of my depression snap to drop this 😌. Introducing....Wanda! Comment to be added to taglist.

PART I || PART II || PART III || PART IV || PART V || PART VI || PART VII

PART VIII of XX

Count: 8097

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You're starting to understand how the dynamic works between the Avengers. While everyone is a star in their own way, they come together as a team seamlessly.

You look around at the chaos on the field, snickering when you hear in your earpiece of Tony making fun of Steve for saying, "language!"

"That's not going to go away soon," you hear Steve mutter.

"David, do you know how to take down the shield?" You ask.

You hear David hum.

"I don't know. There's a pathway under the north tower. Blow it up or something," You could picture David shrugging.

"Oh my god," you mutter.

"Hey, that was my idea!" Tony flippantly said as he flew towards the north tower while David hung casually from Tony's ankles.

There was so much happening on the field. Tony was sending his Iron Legion bots to help the civilians, though you doubt the civilians will appreciate it.

You were watching rather idly on the field, occasionally taking out an android or soldier. But you could hear something in the area.

Footsteps.

Footsteps that were much too fast to be a soldier or an android.

You looked at Clint, who was hiding behind a tree, pulling his arrow in his bow to try to take out a bunker. He shot the arrow, but before it could reach the person manning the bunker, someone caught it.

Clint seemed confused, but you had seen it somewhat clearly. It was shocking to you.

A blond, almost silver-haired man with a trimmed goatee and 5 o'clock shadow was...running. That was the best way you could describe it in your eyes.

To the human eye, he was a blur.

"We have an enhanced on the field," Steve notifies everyone when Clint had tried again, but the intruder had caught it, and Clint was hit by a blast in his side as he was distracted by his shock.

"Clint's hit," Natasha tells everyone else right after. "He's going to need evac."

"I'll take care of the enhanced," you let everyone know while Thor says he can take Clint to the jet.

You take off, running in the direction you saw the speedster go. It's relatively easy for you to catch up with him. He seemed to be making his way back to the base.

Even though you're a relatively older vampire, you can't seem to catch up with him completely. You're trailing behind him, but even so, that seems to surprise him.

He stops in his tracks, causing you to stop as well. He stands there before you, eyes wary as he takes you in as you try to remember everything in David's file.

Pietro Maximoff.

"What are you?" He asks, accent thick in his voice.

You cock your brow at him, "You know that's rather rude to ask a lady."

You see the slightest twitch in his lip. You take his face in more slowly this time.

There is part of him that reminds you of Tatyana, and you're sure he's her descendant.

"You're different," he comments, "but I don't remember seeing you as part of the Avengers."

"I'm really just a part-timer," you tell him.

He takes in your response. You stand still, trying to listen on the field because David's file told you there were two of them.

You don't hear anything else on the field, and when your eyes dart to the side for just a moment, Pietro smirks.

"You're fast," he says, "but you're not as fast as me."

Before you have anything else to say, Pietro takes off again. You have half a mind to chase after him, but you know it would only be a game of tag.

"Careful out there. Pietro has run off, and his sister is not in the area," you warn the team.

"We've got all the data from their systems; I'm going to head back first to process it all," David speaks back into the intercom.

You're about to take off towards the base when you hear Natasha advise they've locked down their positions and Steve telling her to get Banner.

You pause.

You know the girl, Wanda, is likely to be in the base with Tony, and you really should go because David has left, and Tony shouldn't be left alone.

But...

You turn around, running off towards Natasha.

It was a shot in the dark plan that Bruce had come up with some time ago. Bruce asked that Natasha be the one to try to bring him back since Tony would be busy handling the inside of the base, and for some reason, Natasha was the next person he thought would be able to bring him back.

Still, you were worried.

Trust or not, you know what the Hulk is capable of, and your instinct wouldn't let Natasha face that alone.

You quickly find the Hulk grunting as he walked around the snow in a secluded area. You step out quietly, undetected as you see Natasha approaching from the other side. On the outside, she appeared completely fine, but you could hear her heart trembling in her chest.

You didn't step out into view because this was for Natasha to do, and you didn't want to overstep your boundaries with Bruce, but you would intervene if necessary.

"Hey, big guy," Natasha softly said so that he wouldn't feel threatened. The Hulk growled at her, stepping towards her, and you felt your thighs tense, wanting to move forward immediately, but you held yourself.

In terms of strength, you weren't stronger than the Hulk. But your odds were definitely better than anyone else's, and your body would be more durable if he hit or threw you.

And while Natasha may be enhanced, the Hulk could accidentally kill her.

"The sun's getting real low," Natasha coos, putting her hand out in front of him as she kneels.

The Hulk scowls at her, breathing heavily. He stares at her hand, and to Natasha's credit, her hand was as still as a stone. The Hulk grunts again before he reaches his hand back out to her, flipping it over before placing the backside of his hand down onto Natasha's.

She swallows, trying to give him a reassuring smile as she strokes his hand. For a second, you think you see him relax a little.

But something shifts, and you're unsure if it's because of Natasha or because of the Hulk. Whatever it is, you sense the change immediately, watching his shoulders tense and tremble, the low grumble in his throat.

Before you know it, you're digging your foot into the ground. It goes through the snow, breaking the gravel underneath and your hand ripping off part of the tree's trunk as you burst towards Natasha.

Before the Hulk can knock Natasha into the air, you hurdle into her, rolling a couple feet away in the snow. The redhead is breathless, surprised to see you.

"What are you--" She starts to say as the two of you stand up.

"Stay here," you tell her as you blur in front of the Hulk.

Natasha feels her heart fills with fear as you stand before the Hulk. You look so tiny compared to him. The rational part of her brain knows that you're not human. You're stronger, stronger than many people out there. You're an immortal, and she's aware that only one thing can kill you.

But she can't help but feel fear because Natasha couldn't help herself from feeling it in front of the Hulk.

Natasha watches you, your mouth reared back in a snarl, and your teeth look sharp.

And then she felt it.

An invisible crackle in the air.

The hair on the back of Natasha's neck stood, and it felt like her feet were being rooted to the ground. She looks at you again, and your eyes are glowing red.

And it's the first time Natasha realizes that you are a vampire.

A predator.

Dangerous.

You look at the giant creature before you. His muscles are tensing under the pressure you're exerting.

He hasn't moved from his spot, but he's growling and roaring at you.

It's not enough, you know.

It would be nearly impossible to compel him to simply turn back.

You turn, taking a silent step, so light and quiet that it doesn't even leave an imprint in the snow. You hold your finger out, catching his attention, and the Hulk snarls at you.

Calmly, you bring the finger between your eyes, the red fading away. The Hulk follows the movement, looking right into your eyes.

Your pupils expand, looking like they've exploded into liquid tendrils.

"Relax," you command lithely.

You can see the Hulk trying to resist, but his pupils are dilating in and out. He's grunting, glaring at you, but you remain expressionless.

"Look around you," you softly say, his head turning automatically. "There's no more danger. It's just you, me, and Natasha. There's nothing to be angry at. Nothing to smash."

The Hulk looks back at you, and you still have your compulsion on.

"Relax," you tell him again.

This time, he stares longer, eyes remaining dilated.

He let out a puff of air, a small whine before he started shaking his head. Not long after, he staggered back, falling to the ground stumbling as he began to shrink, and the green started to fade.

When all was said and done, Bruce Banner lay in the snow, getting up slowly as he watched his surroundings.

You close your eyes for a moment, pupils returning to normal as Natasha starts to move towards Bruce. Your instincts still feel like they're on haywire, wanting to immediately intercept her from getting closer, but you're able to rationalize that Bruce isn't a threat anymore.

He's simply a man, with a beast sleeping inside.

Natasha gives him his clothes that he changes into behind a tree. When he comes back out, he gives you a self-deprecating smile.

"I'm guessing the lullaby didn't work?" He asks.

You shrug. "It did a little. Perhaps if it was someone you were closer to, it would've worked all the way."

A part of you felt like if you didn't monopolize Natasha's time, she would've become a good friend to Bruce.

Not to say there weren't now, but there was hardly a bond.

"How did you get me to turn back?" Bruce asks.

"Compulsion," you answer simply.

"You can compel me to turn back?" He asks, surprised, a tinge of hope in his voice.

You shake your head.

"Not exactly," you clarify. "I used compulsion to sway you into calming down. You weren't exactly on a rampage, so it made it easier."

Bruce bites his tongue but gives a sharp nod.

Right after, you hear Steve in your ear saying they've secured the scepter. The twins have escaped, but it was time to head back to the Quinjet. Bruce starts to head back first, and Natasha starts to follow, but you stop her.

She looks back at you curiously.

You can't help it.

Your instincts are going off even though you know Natasha's not in immediate danger.

You can't help but check her over, eyeing every bit of her to ensure she's not hurt. Natasha seems to know what you're doing, smiling lightly as she steps forwards into you, wrapping her arms around you.

"I'm okay," she reassures you.

You blink, momentarily surprised, but you wrap your arms around her.

"Why did you come?" She asks you. "I know you were planning to meet the twins."

You inhale her scent slowly, feeling the relief hit your system.

"Nothing," you rumble, pulling back to look at Natasha's face. "Nothing could keep me from you if there's a chance you might get hurt."

You lift your hand to cup her jaw, slowly stroking her cheek. Natasha leans into your touch, eyes fluttering closed for a moment before she looks back at you.

Her green orbs have you captivated, and you can't help but stare into her eyes, remembering every detail of them. The tiny speckles of sun within the lush forest of her eyes have you falling for her all over.

"I want my vows to mean something with you," you mumble, leaning closer to her face, eyes dropping down to her lips.

Natasha's heart flutters as she feels her eyes closing. She grips the back of your jacket tightly between her fingers.

"Your vows?" Natasha husks.

The tip of your nose touches her, and her nose feels cold. You can see your own breath out in the cold as your lip brushes against hers.

"You're mine to protect," you say before closing the distance, pressing your lips against hers softly.

You find that her mouth is much warmer.

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You wished that Natasha would've let you take her back first class again, but she seemed to think it would be better to travel back as a team.

That being said, she was adamantly against you buy everyone's plane ticket first class.

You shifted in your seat, feeling uncomfortable in the aircraft as you watch Steve fly. It doesn't help that you can hear Bruce playing opera music through his headphones. You know it probably helps him relax, but you can't help but feel like it's doom music.

You watch as Natasha goes over to him, trying to comfort him as she turns his music off.

"Hey, the lullaby half-worked. Don't beat yourself up too much."

"Yeah," Bruce shrugs. "I just didn't expect Code Green."

"If you hadn't been there, there would've been double the casualties. My best friend would've been a treasured memory," Natasha smiles.

"You know, sometimes exactly what I want to hear isn't exactly what I want to hear," Bruce looks at her.

You resist the urge to snarl at him because you can tell it makes Natasha feel bad when her intention is to make him feel better.

"Thor, report on the Hulk?" Bruce asks, shifting his attention to the Norse God.

"The gates of Hell are filled with the screams of his victims," Thor happily shares.

You resist the urge to laugh when Bruce groans, and Natasha glares at Thor.

You catch David's eye from across the aircraft and find he's also smirking.

"Uh, but, not the screams of the dead, of course," Thor tries to backtrack. "No, no, uh...wounded screams, mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and, and uh... and gout."

"It probably would've been worse if you weren't there," Bruce says as he looks at you, and you merely shrug.

"Can you compel me to not change or compel me to change back when I'm the Hulk?" Bruce asks, looking hopeful.

Everyone looks at you.

"Compel?" Tony asks as he squints his eyes at you.

"Out on the field. The lullaby didn't quite work as well as we thought. If she hadn't been there, I don't know what I would've done to Natasha," Bruce purses his lip in shame.

"What did you do?" Tony asks you, but Bruce cuts in.

"I don't know how to describe it," Bruce starts. "I mean, for starters, I only remember bits and pieces of it, but it was like something overcame me, overrode what the Hulk was feeling. It allowed me to change back."

You felt like you were getting an oncoming headache from this.

Tony looks at you suspiciously, and you roll your eyes.

Before you can say anything, David jumps in to explain for you.

"Every vampire has a power called Compulsion," he draws the attention to himself. "We can essential mind control humans by having them look into our eyes. It's generally not something we can use to control people forever, but it does get stronger with age, training, and diet."

"Diet?" Clint clarifies from his spot.

"Human feeders are always more powerful than vampires who choose to feed on animals. Blood bags are the halfway point," David shrugged.

You turn to look at Bruce.

"Either way, the answer is no," you tell him. "For one, it's not a power I like to use unless the situation calls for it. While you may feel that every case the Hulk is in calls for it, I don't. Secondly, I didn't compel you to change back. As I said, I only influenced you to remain calm. It's unlikely I can compel you to turn back if the Hulk's willpower overpowers mine when he's wild. Thirdly, I'm not your keeper. I'm not interested in Hulk-sitting for you if we're out on missions."

It's rather blunt, but you don't want to beat around the bush regarding this matter, lest you wanted Bruce to keep trying to convince you.

"You sound like you trust him," Bruce grumbles unhappily.

You shrug once more. "It's not about trust. He's a part of you, whether you want him to be or not. He's not going anywhere. I accept that about you. Do you?"

Silence falls over the aircraft, but you don't care. Bruce stares at you, and you quirk a brow at him.

He doesn't provide you his answer, most likely because it's a no, but tension rises.

"Anyways," Tony breaks up the quiet with his own brow cocked. "Dr. Cho's on her way in from Seoul. She's gonna set up in your lab, that okay, Banner?"

"Uh, yeah, she knows her way around," Bruce blinks.

Just like that, the rest of the ride is spent discussing the mission, the scepter, and Strucker.

At some point, Natasha comes to sit next to you. You fingers twitch, wanting to reach out to her, but you force them to remain at your side.

"Hey," she whispers, but it clear as day for you.

"Hey," you say back, smiling lightly when you feel Natasha's pinky atop of yours.

You suppose flying in the aircraft wasn't all awful.

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"How you holding up, bud?" You asked with a slight drawl that had Clint chuckling as he winced.

Dr. Cho was arguably one of the most beautiful women you've encountered, and she had a slight bite in her that made her easy to get along with.

Clint merely makes a grunt and a sequence of grumbles that get you chuckling back.

"You sure he's going to be okay? Pretending to need this guy really brings the team together," Natasha asks as she looks at Dr. Cho.

Clint playfully glares at her while she smiles innocently back at him.

Dr. Cho smiles reassuringly at the redhead. "There's no possibility of deterioration. The nano-molecular functionality is instantaneous. His cells don't know they're bonding with simulacrum."

"She's creating tissue," Bruce says with amazement in his voice and eyes wide.

You're lost on the rest of the talk as you look around the room and machinery. David would know much more regarding the technology in this room, but he was currently with Tony working on the scepter.

"I hear that your venom does exactly the same thing my work does, if not faster and better," Dr. Cho says, grabbing your attention. You can tell she fascinated with you by the look in her eyes. "Would you be interested in giving me a sample of your venom or blood?"

You give her a smirk but shake your head.

"I'll have to politely decline," you tell her as everyone looks at you in the room. "While my venom is capable of healing someone, it's also capable of killing or changing someone. The last thing I want is for the wrong person to potentially get their hands on it and figure out how to activate my venom that way. On top of that, using venom has side effects."

You look at Clint, "I only use it for life or death situations on humans. Otherwise, I would've healed you on the field."

"What kind of side effects?" Dr. Cho asks.

You hum.

"Every human reacts a little differently to it. But generally, the more venom a human has in their system, they take on features of a vampire. It's very subtle," You wrap a strand of hair around your finger. "Maybe their skin gets clearer, hair gets a little shinier, they feel less hungry or even find they need less sleep. Of course, it's not forever because the venom is eventually diluted out by more blood being produced in their system if a vampire doesn't continually inject them with venom."

"That doesn't seem like bad side effects," Clint frowns.

You smile at him before you release your hair and go back to crossing your arms.

"Perhaps not, but sometimes the symptoms come in another form too. Like you're hungry, but for some reason, food just isn't hitting the spot for you."

He blinks at you.

"Are you saying..." he drags, not wanting to say it out loud as he scrunches his nose.

"That as a human, you might get the craving for blood and possibly drink it to satisfy the craving? Yes."

Clint visible shivers in disgust and gags at the thought, and you shrug with a laugh.

"That's why I prefer to not use my venom unless I have to. While everyone reacts to it differently, I try to not take the chance," you look at Dr. Cho.

"Wait, wait, wait--" Tony interrupts. "Capsicle told us you used it on Natasha."

You nod, not seeing the problem.

"Well, I highly doubt she was going to die from a gunshot wound, and there was a medic there," Tony states like it's obvious.

You tilt your head with quirk your brow. "Well, one, I was making a point of revealing I was a vampire. Secondly, I was--am attracted to her, and now I'm dating her. Her safety will always be my number one priority. I will always use my venom to heal her if she's hurt."

"That's just favoritism!" Tony shouted indignantly.

You gave him a look that just screamed, 'Yeah? Have you not been listening to me?'

Natasha let out a burst of laughter at Tony's face.

The rest of the time was spent bickering about tonight's party, and you couldn't help but catch eyes with Natasha every few minutes.

And she's looking back with you with half-lidden eyes.

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You have an unsettling feeling in your stomach, though you aren't sure why. David seems to feel the same as you can see him across the room, tapping his foot impatiently.

"What's wrong?" You say quietly, garnering only David's attention.

"I don't know," David sighs. "You know how I was looking at Tony's system and helping out with the scepter, right?"

You hum.

"Tony is trying to build some kind of protection legion for the world, but something feels off," David says quietly, barely moving his lips. "I feel like I saw something I wasn't supposed to see."

You hum again. Tony had seemed off-balance to you. He was clearing suffering PTSD from the alien invasion in New York, but then he seemed more...off after returning from the base in Sokovia. It was subtle, but he appeared to be slowly becoming unhinged to you.

"Tell me about it later," you tell David, who nods sharply.

You set off to try to enjoy the rest of the night.

"Well?"

You look over the bar as you lean over the counter. Natasha's looking absolutely delectable tonight. She had given herself a haircut before the mission, and while you somewhat missed her long hair, the short haircut was doing it for you too.

"What can I get for you, sweetheart? I think this one's on the house," Natasha flirts with you. You're barely holding your own smile as you look at her.

"I'm not sure what kind of drink I want, but I do know I want to take the bartender home. Do you think she'll let me?" You ask with an innocent look that has Natasha smirking.

"Play your cards right, and she just might."

Natasha winks at you before she has to go to the other end of the bar to help another person with their drink, but not before leaving a rum and coke for you.

You watch her saunter off, looking just delicately over her shoulder to smile at you before she focuses on the person in front of her.

"See? Told you things would work out."

You look beside you to see Steve standing there with a big ole' grin on his face.

You roll your eyes.

"Must be hard being right all the time, huh?" You joke.

"Yes," he sighs dramatically, "but it's a burden I must carry."

You both burst into laughter, and you let out a light sigh. You had missed Steve with the time apart, his friendship is so important to you. Steve is looking at you gently too, and you're happy to know he feels the same.

"Have you called Sharon?" You ask.

"Somehow, I knew you wouldn't forget that," Steve quirks his lip.

"A deal's a deal, pal," you lick your lips.

"You'll be happy to know that I did. There may be an upcoming date," he seems almost proud of himself, and you can't help but smile.

"Atta boy!" You smile as you slap him on his shoulder.

"You sound like Bucky when you say that," Steve shakes his head.

"Any leads?" You ask with a sympathetic smile.

Steve shrugs. "Sam is still chasing, but I'll catch up with that later."

"Well, let me or David know if we can be of any help."

Steve nods in thanks.

The night starts to fade in as the rest of the party gathers around the coffee table, sitting haphazardly with their drinks in hand. You're sitting on the divan couch with no sides or back, while Natasha is leaning half her body on you with a bottle of beer in hand.

Everyone's currently trying to see if they can lift Thor's hammer.

You watch as Tony and James try to pull it together, it's truly a hilarious sight to see.

You and Natasha grin as Bruce tries, even attempting to turn into the Hulk to lift it while everyone eyes him warily.

"Good attempt, big guy," you give Bruce a thumbs up.

"How about you try, Elaine?" Bruce gentlemanly gestures to the hammer, and you snort.

"No thanks, I already know I'm a piece of shit, no need for a magical home depot tool to confirm it for me," you grin, swigging back your drink to keep it light-hearted.

You feel Natasha softly brush your hand over your glove, and you turn your hand over so you can intertwine fingers.

You wish you could kiss her right now.

Steve is next in line, and Tony smirks at him.

"No pressure, cap," Tony steps aside.

Steve rolls up his sleeves and begins to pull on it.

Thor is laughing because it seems like nothing is happening.

But, ever so slightly, it budges. Thor seems to catch the movement as well as his face drops.

But the hammer doesn't move anymore after that, and Thor resumes his laughter and jolly.

"Nothing," he laughs with relief.

You chuckle lowly, Natasha feelings the vibrations against her.

"What?" She asks quietly.

You've long finished your drink, using your free hand to wrap your arm around her waist. Pulling her closer, you turn your head so that your nose is right against the top side of her head.

"One day," you whisper in her ear so that only she may hear, "Steve will be worthy."

You finish with kissing the top of her head while Natasha blinks with wide eyes, processing the information.

"Widow?" Bruce looked over at Natasha.

The surprised look on her face dissipated as she smirked, leaning more into you as she held up her beer bottle.

"Oh, no, no," she shakes her head, taking a sip of the beer, "that's not a question I need answered."

The jokes go around some more about how the hammer is rigged until Thor stands up.

He grabs and lifts the hammer with ease, tossing it in his hand.

"Yes, well, that's, uh, a very, very interesting theory. I have a simpler one," Thor smiles, "You're not all worthy."

Everyone groans good-naturedly, even with someone throwing some chips at Thor.

Suddenly, there's a loud screech.

Everyone hunches over as they cover their ears. With your super hearing, the screeching is even more painful to your ears.

When the noise fades, and everyone slowly gets up, you look over at David, who is staring behind you.

You turn over to see a limping...robot? Wires were hanging out everywhere, and he looked like a scrap of junk metal.

"Worthy... No... How could you be worthy? You're all killers," it slowly spoke.

"Stark," Steve called with a little bite in his tone.

"JARVIS," Tony called, but nothing replied.

"I'm sorry. I was asleep. Or...I was a-dream?" It tilted its head.

Tony pulls out his device, tapping on it as he looks like the monstrosity before them. "Reboot. Legionnaire OS. we got a buggy suit."

Nothing seems to be working even as Tony taps away.

The robot stumbles forward, tilting its head downwards. "There was a terrible noise...and I was tangled in... in...strings. I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy."

"You killed somebody?" Steve asks, narrowing his eyes.

You look over to David, who is staring at the robot. He's doing his best to scan it, but you know he needs to touch it to deactivate it.

"I didn't hear anyone in this building die. Did you?" You speak fast and quiet.

"No, I think that thing did something to JARVIS. JARVIS is supposed to be the first line of defense, but JARVIS isn't responding," David spoke back.

Suddenly, you hear a playback recording of Tony saying he sees a suit of armor around the world.

"I'm starting to feel like we should've had our conversation earlier," you mumble while David scrunches his nose.

"Ultron!" Bruce calls out in realization.

"In the flesh. Or, no, not yet. Not this...chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission," Ultron's voice stutters, but you're sure it's just the suit falling apart.

"What mission?" Natasha asks, and you can see everyone reading their guns.

Ultron looks up, his movements are stiff, but he looks back at everyone.

"Peace in our time," Ultron says before Legion bots smash through the wall and begin to attack everyone in the room.

You immediately cover Natasha, landing atop of her. You can hear guns being fired as you look back down at your girlfriend.

"You know, we've been in this position way too many times this week, and it's not for the activities I was hoping for," you half-joke. Natasha at least has the sense of humor to smirk at you before you pick her up and blur over to behind the bar.

"David, go find out what you can! I got it here, but I won't be opposed if you come back!" You shout.

"Got it!" David had taken down one of the bots before he ran out of the room. Ultron had looked his way, but David was too fast to be stopped.

"This is fun, isn't it?" You asked sarcastically.

"Considering we're being attacked by robots, I'm going to say David is carrying our fucking asses," Natasha quirks her lip at you as she readies her gun.

"I resent that," you tell her. "It's true, but I resent that."

You peek your head up, looking to gauge your situation. Everyone seemed to be trying to tackle a bot on their own. You turned back to look at Natasha, who is eyeing the stairwell over to the side.

You think it might be faster to take down Ultron, but you're not sure it will stop the bots. Not to mention, you're unsure if taking down the crickety suit that Ultron was in would even truly stop him or if he could transfer his consciousness into another bot.

You hop over the counter, immediately dodging a fire shot at you as you run at lightning speed to a legion bot, leaping in the air as you wrapped your arms around its neck, yanking it off with ease.

It immediately powers down as you crush the head into scrap metal, bolts, and screws falling onto the floor.

Natasha takes the chance to run to the stairwell, making her way up as she fires bullets at the bots, but the bullets seem to ricochet off, and you're not surprised since it was Tony who made them.

You see Steve's shield on the floor, and you roll your eyes as you run over to it and pick it up, swinging it into the neck of a bot that Clint was trying to take down.

"Thanks," Clint huffs. "I was just about to give that back to Cap."

"I'm starting to feel like a boomerang would've been better than a shield," you roll your shoulders back.

"I mean, it's got the perfect shot, apparently. It can ricochet back to him..." Clint shrugs.

"And yet, it was here on the floor."

You turn your body over.

"Steve!" You call out, grabbing his attention. He turns is head as you throw his shield towards him. "You mind giving me a lift?"

He catches his shield, bracing it against his body, angled towards the ceiling as you run towards him. He seems surprised by the speed as you leap onto the shield, and Steve propels you upward.

You use the momentum to leap onto the bot floating in mid-air. It tries to use its arm to grab you, but you grab it with brute force as you rip it off from its body. You quickly then grab the head and rip it off. It powers down and begins to fall, and you adjust your position so that your feet are in the middle of its chest, crushing the body entirely as you land on the floor.

You still see a couple half-baked bots flying around, and you sigh.

A bot catches your attention from the corner of your eye as you see one flying towards Dr. Cho. It looks like it's about to shoot at her, but it lowers its weapon for some reason instead.

You're about to go save her when you see David come in from the side, merely touching the bot, and it powers down before David punches a hole through its chest.

He turns around, smirking at you before he takes off, taking care of the rest of the bots in the same manner. It's only seconds before all the bots have been deactivated, and David comes to stand before Ultron.

"Well, that was dramatic!" Ultron tilts his head as he looks at you and David. "And who might you be? You're not part of the Avengers."

"You won't find anything about us regardless of where you look," David shakes his head. "You can't win against us. Me, in particular."

Ultron seems to pause before continuing on. "I'm sorry, I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through. You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to...evolve?"

He picks up one of the dismembered Iron Legion bots, holding it between his hands. "With these? These puppets? What a joke."

Ultron looks straight ahead at everyone. "There's only one path to peace: The Avengers' extinction."

Thor immediately throws his hammer towards Ultron.

"Wait!" David yells, taking off after the hammer, but he's a second too late when the hammer crashes into Ultron, dismantling his body.

The lights begin to dim as he fades. As he disappears, Ultron sings his last words.

"I had strings, but now I'm free. There are no strings on me...no strings on me."

"Fuck," David sighs.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Everyone stood inside the lab, looking at the broken bot bodies, and other various things.

The scepter was gone too.

"It's all gone," Bruce sounded devasted. "Ultron cleared out everything."

"Not everything," David mussed his hair. "He's been in everything, though. Files and surveillance, he may know more about all of you than you know about yourselves. I'm surprised you keep everything on hand here with such shitty encryption."

"Hey!" Tony shouted indignantly, but David shrugged.

"Unfortunately, I couldn't catch him in time when he got dismantled. I destroyed all the bots in here so he couldn't transfer his consciousness, but he escaped into the internet. It'll take some time for me to track him down."

"He got into your files, he's in the internet. What if he decides to access something a little more exciting?" James stood to the side with his arms crossed and brows furrowed.

"Nuclear codes?" Maria realized.

"Nuclear codes," James nodded. "Looks, we gotta make some calls, assuming we still can."

David waved his hand. "I already took care of that. I got into the system, and the codes are continually being scrambled. The algorithm changes every minute. Though, I do suggest you make your calls and figure out the best way to handle that."

"You hacked the Pentagon," James said in disbelief.

"Trust me, I wouldn't have been the first," David looked unimpressed.

"That is true," Tony nods, knowing he's done it himself.

"I'll be right back," James pulled out his cell.

"I'll go with you," Maria took off with him.

"Nukes?" Natasha turned around, crossing her arms. You'd given her your sweater to wear, and she pulled it closer to her body. "He said he wanted us dead."

"Not dead," Steve jumped in. "He said extinct."

"He also said he killed somebody," Clint recalled.

"Was there anyone else in the building?" Steve asked.

"Yeah," Tony frowned. "There was."

He pulled up a 3D image of JARVIS's destroyed consciousness.

"This is insane," Bruce ran his hand through his hair as he looked at the fragmented pieces.

"JARVIS was supposed to be our first line of defense. He would've stopped Ultron, it makes sense."

"Not if Ultron assimilated him," Bruce shook his head. "This wasn't a strategy, this was...rage."

"I wouldn't worry about JARVIS too much," David shook his head as he circled around the 3D image.

"What do you mean?" Bruce looked at David. "He was completely obliterated."

"No," David shook his head. "He wasn't."

David walks over to the computer, shooting up a holographic screen.

"I had some help scrambling the nuclear launch codes," David began typing away.

"Help?" Tony squinted his eyes as he moved to stand next to David.

"JARVIS, the clever little bastard he is, managed to erase his memory and scatter himself all over the internet," David gave a small smirk.

"So, he's a little bit everywhere..." Tony said quietly, nodding to himself.

"Yep," David confirmed. "It'll take me some time to find and collect him. I have a lot of other things on my plate."

"Told you," Natasha whispered as you had your arm around her waist, hips touching. "Carrying our asses."

"Damn straight! Overworked and underpaid here!" David yelled, clearly hearing her, and you rolled your eyes.

"You can always ditch her and come work for me. I offer quite a competitive salary and comprehensive benefits," Tony smiles.

"I would rather saw my leg off, but thank you," David answers without looking at him as he continues to work.

"Well, I--" Tony starts, but suddenly Thor flies in straight for Tony, grabbing him by his neck and lifting him up.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! It's going around," Clint's eyes go wide.

"Come on, buddy, use your words," Tony gasps through the hold on his neck.

"Oh, I have plenty of words to describe you, Stark," Thor glares.

"Thor! The legionnaire," Steve redirects his attention. Thor drops Tony, but not before giving a displeased look at him.

"The trail went cold about a hundred miles out, but it's headed north, and it has the scepter," Thor told Steve, but then turned his head back at Stark. "Now, we have to retrieve it. Again."

Thor's tone was miffed, and as he should be, he was annoyed.

"I don't understand," Dr. Cho looked at the metal parts before turning to look at Tony. "You built this program. Why is it trying to kill us?"

Tony bursts out into laughter, and you feel like it only reinforces your thoughts about how he's becoming...unhinged.

"You think this is funny?" Thor asks with a grimace.

Bruce is just shaking his head at Tony, trying to get him to knock it off.

"No, it's probably not, right?" Tony says, but he's still laughing. "Is this very terrible? Is it so...is it so...it is. It's so terrible."

"This could've been avoided if you hadn't played with something you don't understand," Thor lifts his hammer and points it at Tony disapprovingly.

"No, I'm sorry," Tony stops laughing, seemingly sobering up. "I'm sorry. It is funny. It's a hoot that you don't get why we need this."

"A hoot?" You mumble as you furrow your brows.

"I don't think this the time for this, Tony..." Bruce murmurs from the side of his mouth as he's still trying to shake his head.

"Really?!" Tony exclaims in disbelief as he looks at Bruce. "That's it? Someone snarls at you, and you show your belly and give up?"

"Yeah, if I created a murder bot," Bruce points out.

"We didn't!" Tony argues. "We weren't even close. We weren't close to an interface, were we?"

"Now, don't shy away from responsibility," David cuts in as he turns to face everyone, leaning against the desk. "That's an unattractive quality."

"Who asked you?" Tony scrunched his nose.

"No one, but since I'm doing nearly all the work, I'll say whatever the fuck I want," David smiles.

"Oops," you mumbled, drawing Natasha's attention, "here he goes."

"You created this AI program. Maybe you weren't close to an interface for it, but you should've planned for in case it went sentient. What? Your only goal for this AI program was to maintain peace for the earth?" David scoffs. "You're an absolute moron because you know what Ultron's going to come to the conclusion of? Humans are bad for the earth."

"You're absolutely insane," Tony shakes his head. "That's not what I intended for the program. The program is meant to protect the earth."

"Perhaps that was your intention," you cut in, letting go of Natasha as you stood straighter. "But it's clear that Ultron has deviated from your intentions. Protecting the earth is one thing, but you've forgotten what you're truly trying to protect: the people living on the earth."

"The Avengers were supposed to be different than SHIELD," Steve sighs, and you shrugged.

"Does anyone remember when I carried that nuke through the wormhole?" Tony blinks in disbelief at everyone.

"No, never came up," James entered the room, catching the last of the conversation.

"You know, when I saved all of New York," Tony looks around.

"Never heard of it," James deadpanned.

"Remember? When we had a hostile alien army coming through a fucking hole in the sky from space. We were standing three hundred feet below it," Tony points at the ground. He looks at everyone. "We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all day, no problem. But that up there? That's...that's the end game. How were you guys planning on beating that?

"Together," Steve tells him, and Tony looks like he wants to laugh again.

"We'll lose," he tells Steve.

"Then we do that together too," Steve says somberly, and Tony just stares at Steve.

"Not that we would lose," David shrugs.

"You actually think that we'd win?" Tony asks in disbelief, truly thinking David is an idiot.

"You're Ultron's creator, and unfortunately, you've put the worst parts of your personality and paranoia into him," you defend David, shaking your head as you spoke.

"I don't think an alien invasion that actually happened and could happen again would be considered paranoia," Tony quirked his brow.

"There's no doubt there's a possibility that it could happen again," You shrug your shoulders. "But you assume that The Avengers is the be-all, end-all, that you're the be-all, end-all. You assume that you guys are the only people in this world that can fight whatever shit humans can't handle. David and I are literal proof that other supernatural or mutants exist. There are the twins out there too."

You tilt your head. "I know this is your team, your friends, but even if we lose, there's always going to be a new generation of people who will stand up and fight. Each generation of heroes will be better than the next. We do what we can as superheroes, but we don't need perfection to achieve peace."

"I'm not a superhero," Tony shakes his head.

You give him a light smile. "Could've fooled me."

Tony just stares at you before sighing.

"Alright," Steve claps his hands. "Ultron is calling us out. I'd like to find him before he's ready for us. The world's a big place, let's try and make it smaller."

Everyone dispersed, and David came up to you, scratching the back of his head.

"I'm gonna head back to my place to grab a few things, and shower before coming back," he tells you. "What are you doing to do?"

You ran your gloved fingers through your hair and licked your bottom lip.

"Probably head back to my place too to get a few things. I'll check a physical trail for Ultron if you give me a lead," you sigh.

"You going to use your gift?" David gives you a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah," you grumble. David pats your shoulder before he leaves.

The room has mostly cleared out except for Steve.

You feel someone hold your hand, and you turn to Natasha.

"You're going to investigate?" She asks you, and you nod.

"Need company? I think between David and Tony, they've got the digital trail covered."

You smile at her as you curl your fingers around her hand.

"Can't think of anyone better to accompany me," you lift her hand to kiss the back of it. "C'mon, I'll take you back to my place. We can check in on Allison too."

Natasha smiles as she squeezes your hand.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Familiar.

It's been days since they've escaped the base in Sokovia out in the cold.

It's been so long since she's seen the street markets, she almost feels foreign to it.

Yet, even as she tries to enjoy the freedom she now has, her mind keeps drifting.

"Wanda."

Wanda snaps her head over to Pietro.

"What?"

"Are you okay? I've been calling you for a couple minutes," Pietro frowns as he tries to assess his younger sister's well-being.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Wanda waves her hand. "It's just weird being out after being inside for so long."

Pietro hums, agreeing.

"Come," he says, "We're almost at the church to meet whoever is reaching out to us."

Wanda nods as Pietro turns to keep walking.

Wanda clenches her jaw, willing herself to focus on the mission before her. She doesn't understand what's wrong with her.

It had started when she met up with Pietro again after she had let Tony Stark take the scepter.

Once they escaped, the images from Pietro hit her.

It had been brief. Wanda was still learning to control her gift, and sometimes that meant she accidentally looked into Pietro's mind.

But still, she saw you and hasn't been able to get the image of you out of her head since.

Wanda hadn't told her brother. After all, it was clear that while he did find you interesting, he wasn't fascinated by you like she was. Even if she did tell him, she wouldn't know how to explain it anyways.

She kept replaying Pietro's interaction with you over, and over, and over again.

Wanda's replayed it so much, she's almost convinced she was standing there too.

Familiar.

You were beautiful, no doubt, probably the most beautiful woman Wanda had ever seen.

But it was like she'd known you before, but that wasn't the case. Wanda would've remembered you if she had.

Wanda wishes she had been in Pietro's place when he met you. You were clearly different if you were able to keep up with him.

It'd be easier to understand--to know you if she had been the one there.

But she knew she'd eventually meet you.

Because Wanda only had one goal.

And that was to ruin Tony Stark and his little bandwagon of superheroes.

While Wanda may be curious about you, she's convicted to her goal, and if you were truly with the Avengers...

Wanda would ruin you too.

PART IX

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