#bc even i am conditioned to feel this way immediately

[i-am-church-the-cat]

Coworker: yeah idk, i just don’t like him, he scares me

Me, thinking about the black male manager they’re talking about that acts just like my dad or grandfather: yeah, uh huh

[dxckgrxsonx]

hi you have broken my brain and i am now irrevocably obsessed with jason todd (and especially the way you write him 🥹💕) thank you so much :’))))

thinking so hard about wet soapy jason in the shower and the fact that neither of you would ever be able to shower alone bc as soon as one of you realized your love was in the shower you’d HAVE to join <3

i love how sweet this is.

everytime you grab your towel or switch on the shower Jason appears in your line of sight, shirt already halfway off, an excited little smile on his handsome face.

he’s already telling you—rambling really—that he’s washing your hair first and he needs to condition his because he didn’t have time before and he wants to use the fruity shower gel you love because he likes the way it smells and you both have just this sigh of relief when you press together because of course you feel right at home under eachothers palms.

it doesn’t matter where he is, the second you switch on the water he’s there. you pick up your towel in his general vicinity and his head snaps up, watching you until you head into the bathroom and he’s immediately trailing at your heels.

or, you get home, hear the shower running and before you even enter the bathroom your pants are hanging from one leg. Jason thinks it’s hilarious when you fumble your way into the shower with him, hands already reaching out to touch his soapy skin, all warm and soft and safe.

you both write stupid little messages and make silly drawings on the mirror when it gets all steamy and more often than not it’s a simple ‘I love you’ or ‘let’s fuck later’ with a horrible picture of two stick people laying on top of each other, (you tried your best, okay?).

you know that joke about dads and knowing when you touch/go near the thermostat?? yeah. that. but it’s Jason and his shower sensing ability.

he’s out on patrol, you start the shower and all of a sudden you get a text message from him saying ‘don’t you dare shower without me.’

[astralis-ortus]

placebo effect

✱ boyfriend!bc × fem!reader

— maybe the actual remedy is his smile.

w.count → 1.2k genre → fluff warnings → reader is sick :(, mild cussing, kissing, cute pet names (baby, love, princess) and generally very much in love it makes me sick >:( heh a.n → based on this request! kinda speeding through this (immediately worked on this after i posted the last fic), but i am in need of just pure fluff so here we are, a few hours later. heh♡ ⋆ see masterlist

being sick felt like shit.

growing up, you’ve always been the kid with perfect attendance. be it in school or throughout uni, you’ve always made the effort to attend every single one of your classes—and one of the reasons was all because you rarely ever got sick. maybe it’s because of your parents’ good genes, or likely due to how your mom made sure you always took your daily vitamins, but you’re always known as one the healthiest kids in the class.

that record, however, ended after you graduated a few years back.

you’d like to blame it the shift of environment—you know, given that you literally flew thousands of miles away to chase your lifelong dream, but considering you also moved states away from home for uni… that likely wasn’t the case.

“hey there, sleepyhead.”

a soft groan rolled off your lips when you felt your bed dip to your boyfriend’s weight, his fingers gently ran through your surely messy hair. your attempt to crack a peek at chris wasn’t quite a success, considering how even the slightest bleeding light from the gap behind your curtain was quick to trigger the soft throb in your head to return, fetching another set of low whimpers out of you.

“it’s okay, baby. i’m here. how’s your headache?” he hummed; pads of his fingers now gently pressed against the base of your head as he attempted to relief any pain that might still linger.

chris, your angel of a boyfriend, had been taking care of you since your condition started to decline the day prior. despite your stubbornness about still going to work (which didn’t end well, considering you were sent home by lunch anyway), chris didn’t even peep a word and readily picked you up from work, all geared up with your favorite porridge and cold medicine he picked up on the way.

“it’s fine as long as i don’t open my eyes,” you meekly answered, voice still noticeably very different from your usual cheery ones. “which reminds me, we do need a black out curtain, hun.”

his chuckle filled the rather quiet bedroom, involuntarily tugging the corner of your pale lips into a smile. “we’ll get them after you’re all better, baby,” he assured, hand that rested on the back of your neck now pressed against your forehead, “fever’s pretty much gone. think you could sit up for a bit? gotta fill your tummy with food before the meds, love.”

you know he’s right—you do need to eat, but with the way you’re currently feeling, protesting at any request to shift your body was the only available option.

“can i just eat later?” you pursed your lips, attempting to appeal your plea with a dash of cuteness you knew chris have a hard time standing his ground against. “maybe sleeping more will help…”

“nuh uh, no can do, princess,” chris gently tapped his finger on the tip of your nose, “you need the meds. the food too, but most importantly your meds. i don’t want your suffering to prolong just because you didn’t get your meds on time,” he reasoned, pads of his fingers now gently massaging the top of your head and in turn made you sigh in relief. chris always knew what to do whenever you complained about a headache, and you’re grateful for that.

“fiiine,” you exaggerated, reaching out your arms as a signal for chris to help you up. even with your eyes closed, you knew he had that proud grin etched on his lips when he gently pulled you to sit straight. you winced at the ache, but voiced no complaint as chris planted a light kiss on your scrunched forehead.

“a sec, okay? i’ll bring the radish soup for you,” chris left another kiss on the top of your head, grinning at how excitedly you reacted to the kind of food he had prepared before you heard his disappearing footsteps.

you forced a peek around the room, noticing the dim lighting as chris kept the curtains closed for your comfort. after a quick scan of your and chris’ bedroom, one you’ve been spending a little too much time in for the past couple of days, your line of sight then rested upon your locked phone. a single tap on the screen, and the action easily made your brows furrow.

“babe—”

“chris, it’s 10am on a thursday,” you pointed out as soon as you heard his voice from just beyond the slightly ajar door, “didn’t you say things has been hectic lately?”

“well, yeah,” he shrugged, careful footsteps finally returned to your side, followed by the dip on your bed, “but you’re sick. getting you back to health is a lot more important to me than anything else.”

“christopher,” you groaned, pursing your lips in protest, “i told you to not do things like this! you’re important, what you do is important. you can’t let me stop you from doing all that!”

“but i’m not letting you,” he replied nonchalantly, blowing on the spoonful of soup and rice before he feeds you. “it is my decision. i want to take care of you, and nothing is more important for me than you. as simple as that.”

“but—”

“no more discussion on that matter, baby,” chris warned you, stern gaze immediately shutting off any complaints about to leave your tongue. “it’s on me. you’re my girlfriend, and to take care of you is what i need to do, because i love you and i want all the best for you. okay?”

maybe it’s the fever returning, but you could feel your cheeks warming up.

“…fine.”

with his lips blooming into a content smile, his hand returned to the steady flow of bowl-cooling off-feeding you. he’s happy, and it’s apparent through the way his gaze lingers on you every time you take another bite, slowly finishing the bowl of food in his hand.

maybe it’s your head fooling you with some kind of placebo effect, but you do feel better—simply by watching the tenderness in his face every time he looks at you.

“all done,” he cheerily announced after you took your last bite, gently wiping the corners of your lips with the pad of his thumb. “be back with the meds, okay? just a sec.”

his movements immediately ceased when he felt a tug on the t-shirt he’s wearing, eyes immediately returning to you in worry. “yes, love?”

you quietly looked at him, suddenly feeling a little shy—but why would you be?

“…you.”

“huh?” chris blinked, head involuntarily tilted to one side in confusion. “what was that, love?”

oh god.

“i really wanna kiss you,” you reiterated, lips slightly pursed in embarrassment, “but i don’t want you to catch the cold. but like—you’re just so adorable. why are you like this? i’m—"

any thoughts you had immediately vaporized as soon as you felt chris’ soft lips on yours—smile apparent against your lips. his warm hand gently cradled your cheek, and despite it being short, chris successfully left you feeling dazed.

“…wait,” you eventually blinked, face burning in embarrassment when you realized the cheeky grin he’s sporting just inches away from your face. “christopher! you’re gonna get sick!”

“well, what do you expect me to do?” chris shrugged as he walked backwards, away from you,

“my girlfriend said she wanted to kiss me—how could i say no to that?”

“gosh—christopher!”

©️ astralisortus, 2024. | likes and reblogs are highly appreciated♡

[markresonates]

two hot

summary: for some reason, your body requires more than one alpha to satiate your needs in heat, leading Mark to seek assistance from his best friend when you unexpectedly start going into heat in public.

pairing: alpha bf!Mark x omega!fem reader x alpha!Haechan

other: alphas Jen & Jis lil voy

genre/trope: porn w/ lil plot, tiny fluff bc i'm soft; omegaverse, fake medical conditions as a plot device; (eventual poly, not jealous love tri)

word count: 8.8k

a/n: so here's that markhyuck omega heat sex threesome idea i mentioned a while ago...per usual, it’s longer than i said why am i the way i am so i’m splitting it into 2 pts!

warnings: rough unprotected sex, oral (fem receiving), cock warming, manhandling, exhibitionism & extremely public, voyeurism, humiliation, lil dumbification, overstimulation, degradation & praise, spitting, stomach bulge, cum inflation, knotting, oral fixation reader, breeding & creampie kinks; sweet hard dom Mark & hard dom Haechan, super sub reader [ note – heat sex is categorized as dubcon; therefore, read at your own discretion ]

You thought you had more time. You should have had more time. 

About an hour into your new Introduction to Astronomy lecture, your waning attention span is fully disrupted by a suspicious wetness you feel between your thighs. You uncross your legs and casually glance down, heart dropping when you discover a small pool of glossy slick in the middle of your lecture hall seat, heralding the start of your heat.

it’s official: life fucking hates you. 

Rationally, you’re aware of the fact that you need to formulate a plan but as you shift in your seat, your train of thought is derailed by the sensation sparked between your legs. You clench your jaw and grind your teeth together, forbidding your mouth from vocalizing the shred of gratification you get from squirming in your seat. 

Of all the damn days to pair a bodysuit and a pleated mini skirt, this day has got to be the absolute worst. But of course it had to be warm enough today that you felt comfortable showing more skin. In your mind, it made sense to seize the favorable weather before the last remnants of Summer disappeared into a chilly Autumn, but now you’d rather be bundled in three thick layers and sweating buckets than vulnerable in your current attire.

While you arch your back and discreetly grind against the messy chair, the bodysuit stretches, progressively sliding up your abdomen, and bunching at your waist. The damp material tugs on your hood, a second later, your clit is subjected to rough stimulation directly. Intense tingles ripple through your core from the sensitive spot. Even with your lips pressed together, you can’t suppress the tiny high-pitched squeak in your throat.

Renjun angles his laptop towards you, quickly typing out are you okay? 

You freeze your body. Giving him a terse nod, you rid yourself of the unwanted attention and resume the lewd activity. It takes a mere 30 seconds for your folds to eat up the narrow strips of material that once covered your intimate parts, giving your slick pussy a wedgie. It’s uncomfortably restrictive, and yet, simultaneously a massive turn on. 

You should be more concerned but the torturous pressure feels too good to stop, restraint briefly suspended again in a pleasured daze, chasing the desired pulsating sensation. Your eyes pop out of your head hearing the small metal snap of your bodysuit’s crotch region pop open, exposing your panties underneath and instantly bringing you back to reality. 

Jisung ducks his head near your ear. “Hey, what’s that-?”

“What’s what?” you immediately cut him off, worried he heard the same noise.

He hums, pursing his lips. “What’s that smell?”

“uh, well…” 

You gulp, so mortified that it’s impossible to meet his eyes, embarrassment warming your cheeks, your heat cranking up the bubbling sensation within you.

This shouldn’t be happening. You’ve documented your heat cycle since the day you started taking suppressants years ago. If you left it up to nature, your heat would be a seasonal affair. Now, thanks to the convenience of modern-day medicine, taking one daily pill significantly lowers your heat cycle frequency to biannually.

It’s always been consistent enough that you could pinpoint the exact 48 hour period in which it would start. In fact, a series of predetermined dates are highlighted on your desk calendar for when you’re supposed to be in heat: over four months from now.

Your scent is detectable in two ways: if someone were to press their nose directly to your scent gland, or the significantly more potent way, through the profuse slick secretion omegas produce in heat. 

And given the fact that you’re practically sitting in a puddle of slick at the moment, panic is knocking at your front door with fever. Any alpha in a ten foot radius will soon smell the arousing nectar leaking out of you. 

Fortunately, you’re in the last row of a half empty lecture hall. Rather than a dozen alphas, it’s a handful of the closest ones that’ll be raising their noses to get a whiff of the fragrant aroma floating through the air, two of those alphas being your friends.

Jisung sniffs around curiously, even going so far as to lean forward, over where Jeno is sitting directly in front of you.

“Hmm, it’s, like, sweet and fruity. Do you smell it? Like raspberries…or maybe strawberries?”

Renjun stops typing notes on his laptop. “I don’t smell anything.”

Figures; betas like Renjun don’t detect omega scents until they are at the absolute peak of their heat, and even then it wouldn’t be very strong. 

“Also, for your information, raspberries and strawberries aren’t berries.”

“Wha- Really!?” 

“Yeah. Most fruits that end in ‘berry’ aren’t actually berries, botanically speaking.”

“Um, Renjun?” you try to grab his attention in a hushed voice, failing as a result of Jisung talking over you at the same instant.

Besides your first heat, you’ve always been well prepared. You take preventative measures against potential alphas who may smell you and want to take advantage of a heat-drunk omega. 

Your typical protocol entails remaining holed up in your dark room. The mini fridge by your desk is fully stocked with four days worth of food and beverages, the air conditioner is on full blast, curtains and blinds drawn closed. Your door is secured shut with three bolted locks too.

For your past few heats, Mark has locked himself up with you as well. Being an omega, it was of vital importance to find a trustworthy alpha that wouldn’t savagely take advantage of your heat-induced instinctual nature to follow an alpha’s orders. The whole reason you submit to Mark is because you know he would never take things too far. For your past two heats, Mark was knotting you until his exhaustion proved overwhelming, and he physically couldn’t use his big dick any longer. Basically, your alpha can’t go far enough, for some indiscernible reason.

Based on the increasing amount of slick and the new ache in your core, you’d estimate you have less than an hour before your heat will seriously start affecting your senses. There’s a reason you keep track of your heat cycle, and it’s to avoid horrendous situations like this one. 

You’re struck with uncertainty and a minor sense of helplessness, facing your worst nightmare alone. At the moment, you don’t have Mark by your side, protecting you from other predatory alphas, ensuring you eat and drink something when you’re too out of it to do so yourself; and most importantly, pleasuring you to take away the pain that comes with your extreme heat cramps. 

You need Mark. 

Mouth beginning to water, deep in your filthy thoughts, you don’t register the conversation around you. You imagine him taking care of you in this very lecture hall, bent over the sturdy wooden podium at the front of the class.

You’re preoccupied and perplexed, a fraction of you developing a peculiarly strong craving for a knot – any knot. Considering how fast your heat crept up on you in the first place, you have every reason to believe this craving will continue to intensify. You feel ashamed to admit it, but at this rate, you might just find yourself allowing any alpha to knot you. 

Jisungs face scrunches up in disbelief, hearing another botanical fun fact. “No way. You’re trying to tell me bananas are berries? I don’t believe you.”

Jeno snorts, barely peering over his shoulder to throw his two cents into the hushed conversation. “Why are you arguing with Renjun? When was the last time you ate a fruit?”

“I don’t know. When was the last time you didn’t fall asleep at 6 am?” Jisung grumbles, not-so-quietly as he intended. 

If they weren’t in a classroom setting, Jisung would’ve hidden behind Renjun or grabbed something to shield himself from the other alpha’s wrath. Jeno fully twists his torso around, dawning a toothy grin that spells trouble for the youngest in the near future. He opens his mouth to speak but ultimately falls silent.

The lecture hall’s desks are the type that flip down to hover over half of your lap. With only your right thigh covered, Jeno’s eyes flick down to where you've been looking. 

He zeros in on the source of the fruity scent Jisung was referencing. He drops his smile, licking his lips, dark pupils flashing candy apple red. The other two shift their attention to your lap in quick succession.

Initially, Jisung doesn’t see what they do from his position. His curiosity then leads the naive boy to bend his upper body down and inch forward. Finally granted a vantage point to peer between your legs, his face turns a shade that matches the berries he spoke of a minute ago.  

“Uh, y/n? Are you, um, in-” Jisung stutters, his bright eyes locked between your parted thighs. 

Both alphas stare, mystified by the sight of your drenched panties, the thin white material now see-through and doing nothing to stop you from making a mess in the center of the lecture hall chair. Lifting your head, you see Jeno’s pupils fully dilated, swirling with lust, and you imagine Jisung isn’t too far off, mirroring the older alpha. 

You belatedly try to snap your thighs together but Jisung, of all people, latches onto your inner knee and keeps most of your seeping slit on display for them. His fingers digs into your soft skin in an uncharacteristically possessive manner, while Jeno quietly growls. 

They’re increasingly aroused hearing a spurt of your slick gush from your core, discovering you to be turned on by your own humiliation. You softly whine, embarrassed beyond all possible belief. 

“What happened to decorum, huh?” the beta scolds the younger alphas. 

Jisung snaps out of it and rips his hand away so fast it hits his desk. “Ow!”

“Acting like you just presented and never smelled slick before? Ugh. Get a fucking grip, you guys.” 

Renjun sets his phone on his desk, angling it towards you to show his screen and you tune out the apology from the frazzled boy on your right. “Hey, so I texted Mark. The good news is he’s on his way.” 

You exhale in relief. “Okay. Wait, what’s the bad news?”

Renjun winces, reluctant to kill your newly kindled hope. “Well…he said it’ll probably take him a half hour to get here.”

“A half hour?” 

You snap your tongue, loathing today’s dreaded turn of events. You squeeze your eyes shut to fight off the tears threatening to stain your burning cheeks.

“Oh, hold on.” Renjun scans the new message from your boyfriend, rereading it in his head, triple checking the text before delivering the additional details. “He said he’s…sending someone to get you? And they’ll be here in a dozen minutes or so.”

You furrow your brow, confused. “Who?” 

“Dunno, he didn't say.” Renjun shoots him another text, asking for the identity of this mystery person he’s referring to. 

You stare at his phone intently, beads of sweat forming on the back of your neck and haloing your hairline. Renjun taps the dim screen to keep it from turning off.

As you impatiently wait for an answer, your old nervous habit of picking and biting your nails resurfaces. You peel part of your nail off and fixate on the minor self-inflicted sting for the sake of a distraction from your intimate regions pulsating with arousal, not to mention the graphic, x-rated imagery about how easily you’d bend over for alphas in your vicinity.

Renjun lifts the back of his hand to your feverish forehead, the worry on his face deepening into his soft features. “Don’t take this the wrong way, y/n, but why did you come to class if you were in pre-heat?”

“When I left my apartment this morning, I didn’t fucking feel like I was in pre-heat,” you hiss through clenched teeth. 

You ring your head low and swallow your bad temperament as the harsh tone reaches your ears. You cringe, barely recognizing your own voice.

“I’m sorry. I’m just frustrated because I don’t know what’s going on. I shouldn’t take it out on you though.”

“No, it’s fine, I get it. You’re stressed out.” Renjun gives you a sympathetic look, equally as confused by your body as you are. “Well this explains why you wore that today.”

“What do you mean?”

Renjun clicks on the weather app to show you the temperature outside. “Because it’s cold today. But if you were really warm, the temperature outside wouldn’t have bothered you.”

“Ugh, oh my god. You’re right,” you reply, mentally slapping your forehead for not actually checking the forecast for today. Simply put, you believed you knew better, based on how warm your room felt when you got out of bed this morning.

You hold your abdomen and apply minimal pressure there, preparing for the onset of pain when your cramps start up, just like the bad habit responsible for the new drop of blood swelling at the tip of your finger. 

Jisung is quick to dig into his messy backpack and procure a quick fix for any minor injuries. It’s clear that he’s trying to be as helpful as possible, still feeling terribly guilty for holding your thighs open and preventing you from hiding what was visible to him and Jeno through your thin panties. 

You dab the blood with the folded tissue he hands you, and then wrap the blue and green, dinosaur themed band-aid around your finger. “Thank you,” you whisper to Jisung sincerely, touching his arm to express gratitude. 

You don’t blame the guilt-ridden alpha too much. After watching your pussy leak slick through the soaked white material, it was only in his nature to want to breed an omega on the verge of going into heat. The baby alpha Jisung you know and love wouldn’t do that.

Renjun lightly taps the back of your hand when you pick the finger next to the freshly bandaged one. He clasps your hands together, preventing you from doing more damage to that hand, at least. 

You frown at your hypocritical friend who himself hasn’t managed to kick the same bad habit as you. Nonetheless, you appreciate his comforting action. 

“You know, I keep thinking why me? What have I done to deserve this?” You gesture at your thighs with your free hand. “And how am I supposed to last another however many minutes?”

Renjun pauses and sighs. “On second thought, maybe you should go now. It’s way stuffier inside, so it might be a good idea to go splash some water on your face in the bathroom first before whoever Mark sent gets here.”

You hesitate for a second. You're troubled by not only the mess you've made in your seat, but the continual trickle of slick, potentially painting a colorful bullseye on your wet cunt. 

Alphas with practiced, keen olfactory systems can track a scent from a mile away, the express purpose to savagely use the needy omega they find simply because your kind is at its most vulnerable in heat. 

You always knew that omegas drew the short stick in life, but it was only after you had observed Mark’s rut in person that you officially became envious of alphas. An alpha’s number one priority during rut, above food and shelter and anything in between, is to breed omegas. 

They’ll brutally fuck a slick hole for multiple days, repeatedly knotting them until their bun-hungry alpha brain is sure that the omega will deliver them happy, healthy pups. 

Nearly every omega and most alphas take suppressants, making the chances of knocking up an omega less than 0.001% if both partners are medicated. Though, regardless of their incredibly slim chances of conceiving, that does not dissuade a stubborn alpha in rut from attempting to produce offspring. 

During Mark’s last rut, despite the primal need to dominate and fuck your brains out, oddly enough, his stamina weirdly didn’t match yours. 

“Whoever Mark’s sending is supposed to get here any minute, so there’s no real harm in leaving a minute earlier. No one would try anything with you if you’re in a public setting like school,” Renjun assures you and gives your hand one last squeeze. 

“Y/n?” Jisung works up the courage to gently tap your arm like you did his, giving you what remains of the travel size tissue packet that’s been in his backpack for nearly three years. “Don’t worry about the chair. We’ll wipe it off when you leave.”

Jeno guiltily turns around again and apologizes like the younger alpha. He then makes a generous offer to save you the trouble of waiting a second longer to leave for good. 

“I can drive you home now, if you want, y/n. And, you know, if you feel comfortable enough being alone with another alpha…no pressure. It’s just the least I can do.”

“Um, thank you. I think, uh…” 

Fifteen minutes ago, when you had no plan whatsoever and hadn’t been in contact with Mark, you would’ve taken him up on the offer, but Renjun is right. You know that a part of you is really craving a knot. However, you believe you’re lucid enough to handle going to the bathroom by yourself. 

You don’t see yourself jumping at the first opportunity to sit on a throbbing alpha cock, bouncing up and down, pathetically begging them to fill you up with an excessive amount of cum, like you did before. Plus, you don’t want to attract even more unwanted attention if two of you were to stand up and walk out in the middle of the lecture. 

“I think I’m good, Jeno. It’s just around the corner. I’ll be fine.” 

You pick up your bag, tying the varsity jacket that Jeno generously handed to you around your waist. You head for the door, walking at a reasonable speed to not attract more attention than your scent likely has. 

Jeno’s jacket conceals most of the slick running down your inner thighs, and you make a mental note to somehow make it up to him later.

You have almost reached the bathroom when, out of nowhere, you’re ambushed by an alpha, pressed face first against the brick wall of the science building. 

Whoever it is had the sense to slip his hand in front of your heated forehead to break the blow against the wall and not crack your skull open on impact. Obviously, alphas don’t want a dead omega. 

You can’t breed something that’s not breathing.

That’s basic alpha 101.

Your heart rattles in your ribcage, racing a million miles per hour. You wish you were allotted enough time to wipe up your slick before being attacked. 

If only you had accepted Jeno’s offer to be safely escorted, then you wouldn’t be pinned to a wall, hands held behind your back by an alpha presumably relying purely on an animalistic desire.

To make matters worse, being dominated so aggressively triggers a surge of arousal from within your inner omega, the yearning for sexual fulfillment intensifying at a rate higher than in your lecture. 

On instinct, tremendously touch starved, you grind your hips back, pressing your ass against the half-hard cock hidden in the alpha’s pants. 

He leans closer to your ear, pulling the cherry lollipop out of his mouth to whisper in a deep, gravelly voice, “Did somebody miss me?” 

You whimper, timidly, and he chuckles. 

Something possesses you to tilt your head to the side, submissive and craving a knot so damn badly that you’re willing to bare your vulnerable neck for the alpha. 

He hesitates, before nosing at your scent gland, shakily exhaling through his mouth. Presented with such an alluring opportunity, the alpha almost loses his cool, tempted to accept your invitation and take advantage of your omega’s baseline reflex to submit. 

Practicing a degree of restraint that very, very few alphas in his unique position possess, he instead places a single soft kiss to the spot he knows is reserved for Mark’s teeth.

Mark…

You break out of your innate trance as lips that don’t belong to your alpha are still pressed to your neck, the gravity kicking in about what it means to allow a stranger to bite and claim you. 

You can’t imagine what your life would be like as a double claimed omega, shared by two alphas, belonging to both Mark and the mysterious, possessive person behind you. 

You catch him off guard by ripping away. You whip around, snapping your tongue when you finally discover the identity of your attacker. 

“Argh, what the fuck, Haechan?”

You lean back against the solid wall, holding a hand over your chest as if your heart is on the brink of bursting through the slats of your ribs. 

“Did you have to give me a heart attack? What happened to saying hello, hm?”

He snickers, a melodious, infectious laugh that makes you want to smile as well. This time, with tremendous effort, you hold your ground. 

“What’s the fun in that, sweetheart?” he says, sticking the candy back in his mouth.

You wish you could chase away the butterflies in your stomach that are consistently conjured up when his designated pet name for you rolls off his silver tongue. You’ve seen Haechan flirt with countless girls, yet he’s always reserved “sweetheart” and “sweetie” for his favorite omega. 

You can’t describe why hearing his pet names excites you, inappropriately so. Perhaps, you like feeling special to him in some way, his sugar-coated sweet tooth reserved for you and you only.

Mark knows all of this.

He would have to be both blind and deaf to not see Haechan’s effect on your body and pick up on the sound of your heart racing. His charming best friend is frustratingly swoon worthy, but Mark had never minded it much. A case can be made that Mark is the jealous type. It’s for this very reason you find it so curious that he allows Haechan to get away with openly flirting with his omega.

“Why are you even-?” 

You freeze as he wipes a tear from your cheek, trailing the back of his fingers along the side of your face and down your neck. He wraps his hand behind your neck with his thumb pressing into where your pulse is fluttering rapidly, tucking the lollipop into the side of his cheek to speak.

“Shh, take deep breaths for me, baby. In…out…in…out.” 

The alpha’s instruction marginally calms your nerves, your omega instincts compelling you to follow without question. You are obedient and malleable, most especially in heat, for Haechan and your own alpha, of course.

“Good girl.” His praise has you biting your lip, whining softly. “Renjun probably told you but Mark’s on his way. He sent me to take care of you first.”

“Oh,” you reply, dumbly. 

You should have suspected that Mark would send him to pick you up. It’s obvious in retrospect. He trusts Haechan with his life; by extension, he would have total faith in his best friend to handle you too.

“Yeah, oh,” he mimics with an annoyingly charming curl of his heart shaped lips. 

Haechan basically gets off on annoying people, although his form of teasing you differs from others. Plus, you never fail to give him the reaction he’s searching for, playfully rolling your eyes, quietly snapping your tongue, or throwing some weak comeback in return. 

“Are you disappointed to see me, y/n? I know you're Mark’s princess but you’ll just have to settle for me this time.”

“Wow, how noble of you. My hero,” you reply, sarcastically. “Can we go now?”

“By all means, lead the way, sweetheart.”

Right on queue, you roll your eyes, just like he knew you would. You take a few steps in the direction he gestures to before the first heat cramp punctures your core. Luckily, Haechan catches your body as your knees buckle, doubling over in pain. 

Haechan clears his throat. “Y/n, you should know that Mark didn’t just send me here to pick you up,” he says cryptically, unpocketing his phone. 

He proceeds to play a voicemail Mark left him. You listen with pursed lips, furrowing your brow as you take in your alpha’s words. 

You try to concentrate on the message, partially distracted by Haechan’s scent swirling around you, quickly permeating your skin and thoughts. 

“Hyuck, you’re the only alpha I completely trust to take care of y/n like that…and by that, you know what I mean. And don’t be surprised if she, like, starts to beg for it. She can be realllly needy, trust me.”

There’s a spike in Haechan’s scent, reminded of his personal mission to hear you beg. 

Despite not having kissed him, you can taste him on your lips. His all-encompassing spicy musk intensifies, melting into a subtle syrupy vanilla that clings to your tongue and stirs up a hunger for forbidden fruit. The cherry candy is no match to his natural scent.

“Oh! One more thing. y/n likes it a bit, um, rough when she’s in heat…so just keep that in mind. I’ll be there as soon as possible, dude. 40 minutes tops. Alright, see you then.”

Haechan looks at you, searching for a reaction, but instead, he sees your face contort painfully again. 

“Sweetie, look at me.” 

You turn your head, now within proximity to count all the pretty moles on his sun-kissed face, like sunflower seeds you’re tempted to taste and swallow by the handful until you’re physically ill. 

“Do you want…” 

You straighten your back again, a chill running up your spine as Haechan slowly reaches under your skirt. He drags his hand up the inside of your thigh. The tips of his fingers draw through the many lines of slick dripping down your legs.

“…my help?” he finishes in a tone deeper than you knew he could produce. 

Your cheeks and ears burn with embarrassment, feeling another mini rush of wetness soak the utterly useless material covering your throbbing core. There’s no denying that you’re incredibly aroused by Haechan. He knows you know he can smell the gush of new slick you involuntarily released.

A strong sexual desire pumps through your veins, driving you up the walls. You’ve always been curious about what it would be like to have the alpha ruin you and use your body like a toy, but you’re not certain how much of that can be attributed to being on the verge of heat. For better or for worse, you decide that that’s a problem for future you to determine, and present you to toss out the window. 

Tasting a mere crumb of Haechan’s touch wasn’t enough – you had to swallow him whole, and the only way you could do that is by giving him the pleasure of devouring you first. 

“y-yes, please.” 

Your answer is so faint that if he were any farther away, he wouldn’t have heard it. 

Haechan suppresses a smug smile, pleasantly surprised to get your first “please” this soon after catching up with you. 

“That’s what I thought, sweetheart.”

His skilled fingers touch where you want him most, grazing over your clothed pussy. Anticipating some kind of pleasured noise, he holds your body close and pops the lollipop inside your mouth. 

He scans your surroundings for a place nearby with any additional smidge of privacy. Locating a possible secluded destination, he steers your weak body in the direction of his choice. Haechan snakes a hand up the front of your skirt again, pressing his thick cock against your ass as you stumble forward. 

Imagining how dirty you must look turns you on, the debauchery of grinding on someone in broad daylight while they have your skirt flipped up to rub over your wet panties has your vision blurring momentarily. Modesty is nothing but a vague concept in the far off distance, seconds away from disappearing over the horizon. 

The next thing you know, your body is pressed against a cool hard surface, bleary eyed and craving the kind of high only a mind blowing orgasm can earn. 

You vaguely recognize you’re behind the science building you came out of before Haechan ambushed you, escaping the bright rays of burning sun that were beating down on you by slinking into the secluded shadows with the golden, silky voiced alpha.

Your skirt rides up as he shoves a knee between your legs. He gets a firm grip on your hips as you grind down against his thigh, soaking the material of his skinny jeans, creating a wet spot in the denim with your slick.

“Wow, would you look at that? Baby made a mess all over me already. I bet you wanted that, huh? Rubbing your slick on me so people know you’re fucking two alphas?”

You remove the lollipop to refute his provocative claim. “I-I’m not fucking two alphas.”

“Ha, maybe…not yet, anyways. But you want to. Isn’t that right, y/n?”

Your mouth goes dry, tongue rough, throat scratchy like sandpaper. You part your lips to argue with him but nothing comes out. Instead, you insert the lollipop again, sucking on the shrinking round candy, a poor attempt at covering up your original intention.

“Exactly…now, let’s see what we’ve got here.”

Haechan places your clammy hands on either side of his shoulders to ensure you won’t lose your balance, then he lowers himself to crouch in front of you.

“Hold.” He lifts up your skirt, giving you the bottom hem so he can get down to business.

Haechan’s fingers dig between your clothed folds, feeling your slick leak onto his hand. The thin material pushes into your entrance in an unsatisfying way and you whine. 

He tsks his tongue three times, shaking his head. “Just as I suspected.” 

You don’t need a reminder of how wet you are, and yet Haechan still brings his hand up for you to see the wet webbing clinging to the tips of his spread fingers anyways. A small embarrassed noise escapes your mouth. 

“Aw, sweetheart,” he coos, using his thumb to toy with your clit, “you look so adorable when you’re embarrassed. All rosy-cheeked and messy.”

Haechan slides your panties down your legs and you cooperate by stepping out of them, hands still anchored to his shoulders. He brings them to his face and licks off a great majority of the wetness that seeped out of you, peering into your soul as he does so. Your lips form a slight pout, missing his touch.

“Ha, Mark was right. You are a needy omega,” he teases and pockets your panties like a trophy he’ll proudly keep forever. 

“What would Mark say if he saw his precious omega barring her neck for a total stranger?” 

You softly moan a bit louder as he curls his fingers just right. Your knees wobble, struggling to stay upright. 

The image of the alpha ravaging your body while Mark watches the act unfold, makes it difficult to focus on your surroundings, distracting you from the minor degree of shame in your chest. 

You couldn’t care less about your indecent exposure at the moment either – you feel too good to care about anything. 

“H-haechan…I want you…want you so fucking bad,” you breathe out, words slightly slurred with the round candy in your mouth. 

Haechan’s cock twitches, picturing you in tears, your walls struggling to accommodate him. However, he is aware that behind a school building isn’t the most ideal place to take an omega in heat, especially considering the potency of your heavenly scent, steadily increasing. 

Since Mark isn’t here yet, the least he could do is take you inside the building.

Your slick seeps into the frontside of Haechan’s clothes, clinging to his upper body for dear life as he carries you into an empty classroom. He sets you down on the lab table and observes the damage to his clothes.

“i-i’m sorry about that.” You lean back, peering down at your lap, nervously.

“Oh, baby…c’mere.”

Haechan cups over your knees and tilts forward to kiss your neck, sucking a dark hickey right next to your mating mark from his best friend. 

“I like collecting these little spots from you.” He pries your thighs apart and draws closer to your bare pussy.

“It’s cute that your body can’t help but mark me somehow.” 

He gets on his knees, darts his tongue out to swirl around your clit. His fingers prod your slick core and slide inside you, stroking your sensitive spot skillfully. The breathy noises he’s rewarded with are ones he’ll remember forever. 

It’s astonishing how quickly Haechan figures you out. 

He’s already in tune with your body, keenly aware of what makes you tick, knowing how to make you quiver and arch your back beautifully. 

Not before long, Haechan has you shaking uncontrollably, squeezing your eyes shut, your short stuttered breathing uneven and shallow as your orgasm peaks, and you topple into an abyss of intense pleasure. The lollipop falls out of your open mouth, rolling off the black table.

You might as well be outside, stargazing in the dead of night based on how many constellations and galaxies twinkle and swirl behind your fluttering eyelids. 

Haechan doesn’t let up on his efforts to overload your system with a tingly static sensation. Sobbing pathetically, you try to bat him away with what little strength you have, overstimulated and overcome with the sizzling heat frying your nerve endings. 

He huffs and retracts his hands, wiping his mouth and the mess of dripping juices on your inner thigh. 

“Okay, fine. I won’t touch you anymore!” he tosses his hands up in the air, melodramatic as ever.

“Finally,” you murmur, granted relief to catch your breath for the first time. 

You’re heavily panting, linking your fingers together and resting your hands atop your head to allow better airflow into your oxygen deprived lungs. He steps back and studies you like a unique specimen for medical observation. 

A few quiet moments pass before the dull cramps creep up inside you, not yet terribly painful but aching in a way that guarantees incoming sharp pains. You whimper for stimulation again, sending puppy dog eyes at Haechan. 

“More…please.”

The alpha’s face is painted with mischief, taunting you by reaching for your body then abruptly stepping back to watch you sniffle, and rock back and forth.

Upon noticing your eyes starting to well up with tears, he ultimately gives in. Haechan curls two and then three fingers inside you, opening you up for his throbbing cock. 

As much as he’d love to see you cry, he’s under strict instruction to satisfy and take care of you. He can’t threaten to not relieve the effects of your heat and tease you to the point of genuine distress.

“Aww, don’t cry, baby. It’s okay, I’ve got you.” 

You let out a breathy moan and make grabby motions to the tent in his pants. 

“Hm, does the cry baby want a knot?” You bite your bottom lip, nodding. “Yeah? Can you use your words? Or is there nothing going on up there in that pretty little head of yours?” 

He lightly taps your forehead twice, then slides that hand up to tangle in your hair.

You smile, shy and small,  and, dare he say, adorable. “You- you think I’m pretty?”

One side of the alpha’s mouth curls up, amused that “pretty” was the only word that you clung onto. He rolls his eyes, teasingly. 

“Of course you’re pretty, y/n.” Haechan removes his hand from your hair to take out his thick cock. “And only the prettiest of girls get this.”

With a newly unveiled salivating incentive, you immediately pull yourself together, spine straight as an arrow. 

You stare at his shiny, precum-glossy cock with heart eyes, licking your lips as he gives himself a few jerks and produces more pearly droplets from his slit. He pushes you back against the lab table when you try to get to your feet for a taste.

“You can choke on my cock later, princess. I thought you wanted a knot? Or did you change your mind?”

“No! I-I do want it,” you frantically reply.

“You sure?”

“Yes, I really want it, Haechan, really badly.” He raises an eyebrow, expecting more. “Please…please, knot me. I wanna be filled with your cum. I’m begging you…breed me, Alpha.”

Breed me, Alpha rings in Haechan’s ears like wedding bells signifying the everlasting bond of a committed partnership. Hearing your sweet voice desperately begging for his seed, using the dominant title you only ever use with Mark, your real alpha, gets Haechan rock hard. 

He savors every second he gets to be your alpha. 

Satisfied with your eloquently worded, pitiful plea, he lines himself up. His shiny cockhead glides through your folds before breaching your dripping entrance. 

“That’s what I thought, sweetheart,” the alpha whispers against your scent gland, his mouth sucking it softly.

 You gasp as he drives his hips forward, forcefully pushing against your tiny hole until you’ve accepted his blunt tip, and sucked his fat cock inside. 

Mark can smell you the second he drives on campus. He rolls his window down to take another alluring whiff, his right hand just barely gripping the bottom of the steering wheel while his left palms the bulge in his snug jeans, tenting obscenely. 

Mind preoccupied, his tunnel vision blinds him from focusing on a single thing besides seeking you out and filling you with loads of cum as soon as possible. He doesn’t recall pulling into the parking lot, getting out of his car, or locking it. All he knows is that, within the blink of an eye, he’s rushed across the campus, his feet landing just outside one of the science labs housed in the same building as your astronomy lecture.

Yanking the door wide open, his wild eyes dart to where his best friend’s knot is locked inside his omega, rubbing your clit so aggressively after your third orgasm that you’re reduced to a twitching mess. 

You don’t immediately recognize Mark’s presence, too lost in the intense buzzing sensation to even register that the alpha barged into the room.

Mark slams the door behind him and purposely leaves the door unlocked like Haechan did. There’s a certain reckless thrill that comes with the possibility of getting caught in a compromising position.

In contrast to the way he raced here, driving haphazardly and disobeying traffic laws, Mark slowly crosses the lab room towards your splayed body in a few, brisk strides. He removes his hard cock from his jeans with a lazy smile, stroking himself and licking his lips as you cry out.

Haechan flicks his chin up at Mark, greeting him happily. He makes a show out of pressing a slick-coated finger against your lips to silence you. 

“Sweetheart, you’ve gotta keep it down. You don’t want everyone next door to hear, right? They’d probably say ‘we should go check on whoever’s crying!’ Only to come in here and find their pretty classmate is a dumb little slut…with a cunt full of cum.” 

You whine, leading him to push two of his dirty fingers into your mouth to shut you up. His smirks as you mindlessly suck on them like a binkie, shutting your eyes and humming pleasantly. 

“She’s so pretty when she cries.”

“I know right?” 

Mark makes a growling noise in the back of his throat as he rubs his hand over where he can see the faint outline of Haechan’s thick knot buried inside you, making your abdomen bulge. Both you and Haechan shutter, feeling a tingly sensation from the pressure your boyfriend applies. 

“So, how’s she been?”

“Well, she-”

“Mar?” you weakly croak around Haechan’s fingers and he removes them.

“I’m here, y/n, I’m right here.” Mark wipes a lone tear of yours away and caresses your warm cheek. “How are you feeling, baby?” 

“I’m…hot.”

“No objection there,” Haechan jokes.

“Why did you send Haechan?” you continue like you didn’t hear the alpha currently plugging you up with cum.

“Oh, y/n. You remember how you were during your last heat.” Mark stops stroking his cock and takes out a tissue to dab away the sheen of sweat on your feverish forehead. 

“Actually, you were probably too far gone, huh?” 

You blink up at him, tilting your head into his hand when he tries to wipe your cheek. If you’re being honest with yourself, you only recall bits and pieces, and none of those memories are exceptionally vivid. 

“I didn’t know it was possible. Like, I looked it up and on average, omegas need to be knotted 5x before their heat breaks. But, y/n, seriously, I lost track of how many times I knotted you and it’s never enough. I couldn’t take care of you throughout all of your heat and it killed me to see you like that and not be able to help you more. You need more than I can give you, princess.” 

He offers you a small genuine smile, his hand trailing down to palm at your exposed breast. Mark gently rolls your nipple between his fingers, hearing you quietly purr. “So Haechan was nice enough to agree to help me help you.”

“But Mark-” 

“It’s for your own good, y/n,” Mark calmly tells you. “And didn’t Haechan make you feel nice?”

“Um, well, I-” 

You gulp, ruminating on how you want to answer, whether you should tell him that another alpha made you feel as amazing as Mark does.  

“Wanna tell me what it’s like to have his knot locked inside that tight little pussy of yours? I know you love being full of my cum. What about his cum? I bet you looove getting fucked full of his cum too, huh?”

“Y-yeah, I love being full of cum…your cum and-and Haechan’s cum.”

Mark smiles at your response and rewards you by pinching your perky nipple. “That’s what I like to hear, baby.”

You whine when Haechan wiggles his mostly deflated cock out of your tight core. “You really weren't lying when you said she gets super wet.”

“Hm, let me feel.” He hums, looking closer and dipping his fingers inside the dripping combination of your fluids. 

Mark widens his nostrils and takes in the aroma of Haechan’s cum mixed in with your juices, his eyes flashing blood red. 

It’s unfamiliar and vaguely off putting to smell his mate has been violated and fucked open by another alpha. Although, overall, the dominant sensation coursing through Mark is arousal, turned on by the thought of sharing your body. 

“Nah, man. It gets worse, you’ll see. Her heat hasn’t even peaked yet.”

Mark addresses Haechan like you aren’t even here. To be fair though, during your heat you’re not all here anyways. 

“W-worse?” you eke.

“By the end of her last heat, she had so much fucking cum in her, I don’t know where it was all going.”

 “Ha, we got ourselves a little cum dumpster here,” Haechan snickers, sliding his fingers inside your cum dribbling cunt again.

With such an overflowing amount of slick and cum, if someone told you that the obscene squelching that fills the room is a soundbite from some high quality pornography, you wouldn’t doubt it. You croon as he curls them up just right, taking a moment to stimulate your most sensitive spot skillfully. 

He retracts them sooner than you’d prefer and brings his fingers to your mouth. “Suck.” 

A fat droplet falls on your bottom lip. 

Mark rubs slow, comforting circles over your abdomen. “Go ahead, baby,” he encourages, leaning down to suckle on your neglected bud. 

Earning Mark’s blessing, you obediently suck your own berry wetness and Haechan’s cum off of the alpha’s fingers.

“God, what a filthy slut,” he says once you’ve fulfilled his wish. “She gives in so easily, she’d do anything to get another load of cum.” 

A weak sound of protest weasels up the back of your throat, disagreeing with the term he used to describe you. You expect Mark to disagree with his best friend’s crude statement, but he shockingly does the opposite.

“Tell me about it, dude. The whole time she’s always begging for a knot and more cum. I know a lot of omegas beg in the middle of their heat…” 

Mark pets your head gently for a second, then snakes his fingers into your hair, giving it a brief yank. 

If you weren’t on the precipice of your heat hitting full force, his sudden action would’ve caused you a decent amount of pain. But by now, your aching body welcomes any form of touch – the rougher the better. The demeaning terms trigger strobing excitement inside you.

“…but with y/n, it’s like where did my sweet omega go? Who’s this needy cumslut?” 

Your bottom lip quivers, internally conflicted by your budding arousal. Mark looks down at you with pity in his eyes.

“Aw, baby,” he coos, “don’t look at me like that. I’m not saying it to be mean, I’m just telling the truth. You don’t know what it’s like trying to take care of you.”

You whine softly, your foggy emotional state making you feel guilty, even if the fraction of you that’s still of sober mind knows that you have nothing to feel guilty for. The seeds of insecurity take root in your head, questioning if he secretly resents being with you, if you’re too much of a burden that he wishes he wasn’t your alpha.

Mark reads the emotional turmoil brewing on your precious face. In an effort to soothe the distress, he quickly leans over to kiss it away. A handful of adoring pecks down your face, lips lightly kissing your forehead twice, the tip of your nose and finally to your lips. He is much gentler now than the hand responsible for the arousing sting to your scalp. Mark tastes the other alpha on your mouth and grins anyway.

“I don’t want you to feel bad about it, y/n.” He again brushes a few stray tears away from where they spill from the corners of your wide, glossy eyes. “I just wanna make sure you’re well taken care of this time.”

“Even without you, I can take care of myself well enough,” you sniffle, lying through your teeth, fooling no one, not even yourself. 

Your hand twitches, wanting to prove a point but hesitating because you're not used to being watched by two sets of eyes. 

“Go ahead and touch yourself, princess. I know you want to,” Mark tells you.

“R-really? Like, um…” You swallow the lump in your throat. “...in front of him too?” 

You sneak a glance at Haechan, who, by the looks of it, is about ready to unhinge his jaw and swallow you whole any second now. You vaguely remember wanting him to do so not too long ago in your most fuzzy heated state.

“Yes, in front of me and Haechan.” 

“Aw, sweetheart. I just fucked your pretty cunt and yet you still feel embarrassed?” Haechan pouts in mock sympathy. “That’s adorable.”

Mark exchanges a look with his best friend before turning back to you. “Be a good girl for me and demonstrate how you used to do it before we met. You can do that, right, babe?” 

An adoring smile reaches his lips, eyes locking with yours. You could try to deny the lewd act, but above all else, you want to please your alpha. 

Mark wants you to be a good girl, and that is exactly what you will be. You gulp, releasing a shaky sigh, and nodding timidly. Your mouth twitches up to mirror his sincere smile as best as you can manage.

“That’s my girl,” Mark beams.

Mark knows how to comfort you, pushing two fingers into your mouth to give you something to wrap your lips around. He gently cups the back of your hand and guides it lower while you’re pleasantly suckling.  

You tilt back, propping your upper body up by extending your left hand behind your back. Folding your spread legs up and planting your heals on the edge of the wide black lab table, exposing your throbbing cunt to the alphas. 

You trace your fingers through your folds, rimming your freshly used entrance before sliding two of them inside, moaning around Mark’s fingers as you follow his instructions. 

Muscle memory of touching yourself on a frequent basis over the years takes charge, and within seconds, you locate your weak spot. 

“There you go. Good girl.”

You mewl, your legs trembling every so often as you draw your fingers up to stimulate your clit. The muscles in your face are equally as prone to a visceral jumpy reaction as your lower half is. 

Craving more, you lay your upper body back against the table, and switch hands to curl your left fingers in your abused pussy and rub quick circles over the hood of your clit, stroking up and down to stimulate every nerve around the electrifying spot. 

“M-mar…” you whimper, drool trailing from your stuffed mouth. “Fuck-fuck me. Please, I n-need your cum now.”

Mark bestows a gentle kiss to the side of your neck. “How about you show me how bad you want it, eh?”

You hop off the table and lower to your knees obediently, folding your legs underneath you and sitting back on your feet, hands placed flat on your thighs, spine arched to show the round curve of your ass.

Haechan whistles. “You sure did train her well.”

“Nah, man. y/n didn’t need training. She’s just a perfect omega.” Mark smiles, happy to show you off. He pets your head as you start to squirm and quietly whimper. 

“Open your mouth, baby.” 

You part your lips, holding your tongue out to catch the spit that falls from Mark’s mouth. He hums, approvingly, watching you swallow it and open your mouth again. He pauses for a second before flicking his chin at Haechan. 

“You want Haechan’s spit too?”

You glance at Haechan and release an affirmative noise a second later. Your core aches for further rough filling again. You rub your slippery thighs together, feeling more slick gush from your throbbing pussy, increasingly aroused when Haechan steps up to the plate. 

He lets a string of saliva dangle from his tongue, slowly dripping into your mouth, and partially dribbling down your chin intentionally, simply because he wants to make a mess of your pretty face.

You're about to wrap your lips around Mark’s cockhead when all of a sudden, the sharpest pain stabs your abdomen. Your jaw drops in a silent scream, crumpling into a ball, squeezing your eyes shut, and nearly blacking out. 

Mark kneels down and rubs your shoulder, lifting your head to look you square in the face. Worry colors his sharp features and shatters the heated, public pornographic fantasy. 

“Shit. y/n’s cramps usually subside for an hour or so after getting a knot,” he mutters to Haechan. “I didn’t want to do this…but I don’t think we have much of a choice now…”

[hint for pt 2]

additional warnings: dr jaem thorough exam, double penetration, spitroasting, oral (fem & male), face sitting, throat fucking, choking, somnophilia, squirting, sex toys, nipple play and breast milking. alright, i think that's it.

it’s 2023.

why did it take me this fucking long to write markhyuck x yn ?? i said i’d write for this pairing in FEB 20 FUCKING 21.

sorry for not posting in forever. the #1 motivation for writers is feedback and interaction. for me, knowing people enjoy my works and appreciate the time i put into something has a huge impact. i'd be really grateful if you shared this by giving it a reblog and would love to see you spam your thoughts/reactions in the tags or comments!

[oct 12th, 2024 update]

pt 2 is about 80% done. now, i'm not saying i WON'T post it in the next week, but comments, reblogs and feedback would definitely inspire me to finish it up soon<3

okay 'tis all. thank you for reading and i hope you (yes, specifically YOU, beloved reader of mine who's reading this RIGHT NOW !) are doing well:))

stream 127's *FACT CHECK*

➾my masterlist

© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[pajarinwrites]

中秋节 | Wen Junhui x Reader

➳ fem!reader x jun

➳ wc: 6.1k

➳ TAGS: idol!au, established relationship

➳ WARNINGS: omg um, cunnilingus, jun is a SIMP, piv sex, unprotected sex (wrap it, my dudes), praise, just general adorable lovey dovey softness, but like medium rough sex? ig, not really rough?, i never know how to write warnings, just like i don't know how to write smut woops sorry

➳ AN: HAPPY MID AUTUMN FESTIVAL BITCHES and 女王们; this is only moderately edited bc i actually meant to publish smt for 中秋节 last year but i didn't finish it in time so here it is now (I’m sure it’s still autumn festival somewhere in the world…)! I LOVE WEN JUNHUI

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WRITE SMUT I HATED THIS AHHHH i don't think i'll ever be able to write any smut in which the man isn't a simpering, whimpering, submissive, cowering, crawling, obsequious little simping piece of trash; it's just how i like my men, but i kinda wanna challenge myself some time, not this time though :P also i'm low-key proud of this smut? i used miraclewoozi as an inspiration bc their smut is literal art...

also, literally three pieces in one week??? WHO AM I??? this is more than in the entire year before combined, i fear lmao. sorry. i'm off to return to hibernate in my bog for another six months now thx bye, RIN OUT *drops mic

masterlist

Jun stepped out of the airport into the sweltering heat, but had to find that merely knowing the weather conditions was quite different from being prepared for them. Luckily, he had left enough space in his carry-on to take off the jacket and sweater that he had needed in chilly Seoul and during the flight – airplane ACs were notoriously unpredictable. Despite this, Hong Kong never seized to amaze him with its constant warmth. At least the eternal sunshine gave him a good excuse to wear a cap and sunglasses at all times.

He flagged down a cross-border cab because, frankly, he didn’t feel like taking the crowded metro all the way home. This way he saved himself from a lot of heat, hassle, and the potential of being recognised, even if it delayed him. As expected, the traffic in the city was a nightmare and he did make it home later than strictly necessary. He paid the fee, dodging the driver’s interested gaze, and mumbling a small “mh gōi” before dashing into his building.

When he was finally standing in front of his apartment door, Jun felt ready to just lock himself in his room for the rest of the night. That was, until the door opened to reveal his parents and little brother. Immediately, his frown softened and he dropped his bags to engulf them in one enormous hug.

“I missed you guys so much,” he exclaimed to groans from his little brother and a soft smile from his mother.

This was most likely going to be the last chance he got to spend more than a day or two with them. With their world tour and his busy filming schedule just around the corner, he wouldn’t have time for months.

Jun had spent years of Zhōngqiūjié apart from them. It wasn’t easy to watch most of his members be able to visit their homes and spend Chuseok with their loved ones. Some years it was only him, Minghao, and Joshua in the dorms. But he wasn’t going to dwell on that. Not when he could finally hold the people he loved the most in his arms. Well, most of them at any rate. He would never get used to having to choose between his biological and his chosen family.

His mother peeled herself away from him, squeezing his cheek and insisting that he had grown even more handsome over the last few weeks.  His step father clapped him on the shoulder and asked him about the flight; his brother asked if he had brought him anything cool. Unable to stop smiling for even a second, Jun assented to both questions. He was led to the living room by his mother to sit and relax after the ‘strenuous journey’, giving him a moment to fish the presents out of his luggage, handing one off to his little brother.

“Thanks, gē!” YangYang exclaimed and bounded off to his room to open it in peace. Their mother called after him, “Don’t forget to do your homework before playing! Dinner will be ready in an hour!” Jun smiled, handing his parents the other one.

“You shouldn’t have! I keep telling you we don’t need anything.”

“But I want to get you guys nice things, mā.”

She looked trapped half-way between smitten and resigned, but accepted the present gracefully. With a kiss on the top of his head she stated, “You can rest a little before I call you boys for dinner. I’m making your favourite.”

He thanked her, foregoing the idea of retiring to his room in favour of joining his mother in the kitchen. Most of the ingredients were already laid out on the counter, but when she bent down to pick up something from the bottom shelf, she gasped, “I can’t believe it! Where did all of our rice noodles go? I don’t think this is enough. And I also forgot to buy bamboo shoots earlier!”

She turned around, apologetically, and murmured about having to go to the market real quick to get some. Jun held out his hand to stop her in her tracks.

“Don’t worry, mā. I’ll go get the missing ingredients, and you can get started on the other dishes.”

“No let me go, Jun. You’ve just had a taxing flight and—“ His step-father tried to intervene.

“It’s absolutely no problem!” Jun insisted, not paying his parents’ protests any mind. He grabbed his sunglasses from the side table by the entrance and was out the door before either of them could stop him.

Jun had missed their shèqū, its homely atmosphere, the bustling of the people on the street, and hence didn’t mind the opportunity for a late-night stroll. The closest super market was just down the short road at the main square, and he stopped by quickly before continuing on his way to the live market.

There was a certain nostalgia in going to the market like this, just the way he used to with his mother when he was younger. The stalls didn’t even seem to have changed at all. There was the same group of old ladies dancing in the small park to the side, and a little further down the road, a small group of children was taking turns, performing on a gǔzhēng. Jun watched the windows of his old piano school pass by, still partially lit as students practiced inside. At the corner of the next street was the second-hand book store they had often visited, next to the pharmacy in which he used to sit on the kiddie rides for ages, singing along to jiātíng chēnghu or liǎng zhī lǎohǔ.

Still lost in nostalgia, he stopped by one of the vegetable vendors to acquire the bamboo shoots. Jun enjoyed strolling the aisles leisurely, taking a look at all the things that were being sold. As he rounded one of the displays, someone else was cutting the corner in the opposite direction. Jun barely managed to dance out of the trajectory of them, murmuring an immediate, “Sorry, are you okay?”

He pulled down his sunglasses and looked at the person in front of him in worry. They looked up, locked eyes with him and whisper-screamed, “Oh my god! Wen Junhui?”

Jun was taken aback for only a split second, which he spent worrying he had been recognised, before he could place your face. He hadn’t seen you properly in years, just another name on the long list of people he had to leave behind. The last time you had run into each other had been during Rock With You promotions, when Minghao and he had taken time for their own schedules in China. His eyes crinkled in the corners but he still didn’t dare to take off his mask.

“It’s been so long!” He said instead. You had pulled him into your arms within a second, just a quick squeeze before remembering where you were. You pulled away, pouting, “You didn’t tell me you’d be back.”

“Sorry, it slipped my mind. I also didn’t think I’d have enough time to meet you. Not properly…”

You wiggled your eyebrows, “What does that mean?” Jun blushed, making you laugh. “I’m kidding, A-Jun. But I’m glad we ran into each other. I mean, what are the odds!”

“I didn’t even know whether you still lived here,” he admitted, sheepishly. But Jun wished profoundly that you could feel how earnest he was being. You didn’t actually seem to mind his failure to alert you of his arrival, despite your history. Instead, you continued in your usual chirpy manner, “Yeah, I managed to find work close by so I could stay here. But I’m here here just for the holiday. Staying at my parents, you know.” Jun nodded, accompanying you to the register under more animated chatter.

“Do you have to get anything else?” You asked after you had stepped out the open market. He negated, returning the question.

“Me neither,” you replied, hesitating shortly before continuing, “I guess that means we’ll have to part ways again…”

The way your voice trailed off and your eyebrows knitted together made Jun reply before thinking better of it, “Actually, I think my mā can wait for these bamboo shoots a little longer…” You face lit up with such intensity and immediacy that Jun had to chuckle.

“In that case let’s take a stroll through the park. I’ve been keeping up with Seventeen obviously, but I want to hear from you, personally, how you’ve been doing.”

Falling into step beside you felt so easy. Together, you walked the same paths you did when you were teenagers, talking about everything and anything – back before he had to leave for Korea. He talked a lot about the shoots, dorm fights and misunderstandings, and how much he had missed his mother’s cooking. You winked, asking whether he hadn’t missed you at all, and he couldn’t string together a coherent sentence in reply. Instead he sputtered for a few seconds before you let him off the hook.

“It’s fine. I was joking, Jun. Oh, look!” Jun was glad for the distraction as he watched you hurry of to the pavilion down the path. If you hadn’t changed the subject he might’ve said something stupid. But when you spun around to face him under the colourful roof, with the small pond and the bamboo in the background, he wasn’t sure that he wouldn’t say something stupid yet.

He was sitting next to you, listening to you rant about your catty co-workers, absent boss, and the general annoyances of adulthood, unable to stop himself from grinning like an idiot at the familiarity, the ease of the whole situation. At some point he shot his mom a text to let her know that he ran into you and to eat without him. She simply replied that he should take his time, but he felt like she was secretly glad to have the two of you reconnect. Your conversations veered from family to old memories together until eventually, when the sun had set almost completely, you got up abruptly.

“I should get back. My mom wasn’t expecting me back immediately but at this point she’s probably wondering if I’ve gotten lost.” Jun nodded, getting up with you and stepping out of the pavilion. You threw one look back over your shoulder before smiling down at your shoes.

“I don’t know if you remember but… this is where you said goodbye…” Jun blinked slowly before the memory registered. He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t immediately thought of the day he went to Korea, the last day he spent with you, the day he missed his chance to say so many things he had wanted to say.

“Oh,” he breathes softly, “yeah, I remember. But it’s not a very fun memory.”

Jun decides to look anywhere but you, at the trees lining the road home to his apartment building, the birds flying overhead, the children playing across the street.

“I have to agree. But I’m glad to have you back now. Even if it’s just for an afternoon.”

“Actually, you should visit tomorrow! If you want, of course. I don’t think my family would mind seeing you again after such a long time, and…”

He stops in his tracks. The two of you have reached the intersection at which your ways part. Jun turned to face you. The words were still stuck in his throat, just like all those years ago, just like every time he’s seen you since. But this time, with your hopeful eyes looking up at him, he takes a deep breath. This time will be different. He takes the leap.

“… and I’d also love to spend more time with you.”

You smile in reply, and agree to visit tomorrow. To say goodbye, you hug him again, and he feels like he’s floating all the way home. Maybe tomorrow he’ll gain the courage to tell you everything that he’s been keeping in his heart.

Their dorms were quiet, the shared living areas swallowed in darkness as Jun excited his room. He had been talking to his family via video call for the past hour or two, catching up and trying their best to celebrate Zhōngqiūjié together, even when they were physically apart. You had initially planned on joining the call, but there had been last minute plans that had kept you from it. Even though Jun understood, he had been able to help feeling a little crestfallen when you had told him about it. The two of you had made it work since he confessed to you a year ago, talking almost weekly on the phone because both his and your commitments kept you from visiting all too often. And since this year he couldn’t visit home because of the impeding comeback, he would’ve at least enjoyed talking to you on the holiday proper, instead of just during one of your regularly scheduled calls. Especially with how long it had been since he’d last seen you in person in June. To him, an eternity.

Vernon, Dokyeom, and Chan had returned to their families for the evening to celebrate Chuseok together, leaving the dorm deserted, save Jun himself. They’d all met up for lunch as a celebration before most left to go home. It was an effort by the Korean members to ease the homesickness of those that wouldn’t be able to see their families over the holiday. Seungkwan had ended up accompanying Vernon, while Joshua and Minghao decided to simply celebrate with each other, even though they hadn’t been lacking in invitations either. Jun had made the same decision. They had let him know they’d be out until the night but that he could join them at their apartment later.

Especially Dokyeom had had a hard time simply leaving Jun behind, but the older man had insisted that he was going to be fine, and that it would give him a chance to call his family in China. But coming out of his room and being greeted with a cold, dark apartment, made Jun question his decision. He sighed, contemplating for a second whether he should simply return to his room instead of feeling the hollow emptiness of their shared dorm. But before he could make a decision, the doorbell rang.

He wasn’t expecting anyone, so the sudden shrill of the bell surprised him. Maybe it was one of the members, back early. Maybe Minghao and Joshua had decided to surprise him at the apartment. But when he looked at the screen of the camera system, he was greeted with a sight wholly unexpected. His breath hitched as he looked at you, your eyes staring straight at the camera, a warm smile on your face. Jun buzzed you in, jittery with nerves as he worried you might disappear or he might wake up. You had been talking about your crazy workload and extra assignments for the past few weeks, how on earth were you here?

This has to be a dream, he thought, standing in the open door and waiting for the tell-tale ping of the elevator. When he heard it, he couldn’t even wait for you to round the corner. In slippers, he sprinted down the hallway to the lift, coming face to face with you as you were trying to heave your luggage out. Jun cast it aside, picking you up and spinning you around. He buried his face in the side of your neck, breathing in the scent of your perfume and your skin.

“How are you here?” He whispered after a good few seconds of spinning and listening to your tinkling laugh.

“Well, you know, I bought a plane ticket, went to the airport in Hong Kong, I got on a plane—“ Jun interrupted you by picking you up again, proclaiming his happiness while you insisted that he finally put you down. If he had been a better man, he might’ve listened immediately. As it stood, it took the two of you several minutes to make it the short way from the elevator to his apartment door, Jun stopping every few seconds to give you another spin or a kiss.

Once you had finally made it safely inside, he brought your luggage to his room, before returning to the shared space and staring at you in fascination. There you were, right in front of him, leaning onto the counters of his dorm’s kitchen as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“How did you know I’d be home?” He asked and you giggled, presumably at his flabbergasted expression.

“I kind of asked the members for help…”

“What? Who?”

In hindsight, he thought he should’ve expected this. There had been a curious lack of invitations extended to him this year. Especially considering that Joshua and Minghao were still invited everywhere. And, thinking about it now, the fact that the two of them had insisted on spending the evening ‘outside’ without Jun had also been more than a little suspicious.

“Almost all of them helped coordinate it, actually. They all had to be in on it to some extent.”

“When did you start planning this?” He asked, making his way over to you. One last time, he picked you up, setting you down softly on the counter. This time you let him do as he pleased without protest, choosing to answer his question instead, “Like a month ago or so. When it started becoming clear that you’d have no chance to make it home this year.” Jun hummed in response, stepping closer to stand between your legs. His arms found their place around your waist.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” he murmured, resting his head on your shoulder and sighing deeply when he felt you wrap your arms around him. He wished you could stay like this forever, or at least for a very, very long time. You turned your head, whispering that you had brought yuèbǐng from Shenzhen with you and he nodded automatically. Mentally, he was still focused only on your presence, the fact that he got to hold you in his arms and use his thumbs to draw absentminded circles on your waist. If he hadn’t been so focused on your body, he would’ve missed the small hitch of your breath as he exhaled against the column of your throat. He smirked lightly, murmuring something along the lines of ‘we can eat them later’ before attaching his lips to the place where your shoulder and neck met. You gasped, more audibly this time as he sucked on the sensitive skin, following the line of your collarbone. You tugged at his t-shirt, whispering that you should move to his bedroom but Jun smirked against your skin, slowly pushing up your shirt. As he tossed it over your head, he whispered, “Don’t worry, we’ve got the apartment to ourselves all night.”

He smoothed his hands under your thighs, grabbing onto your plush flesh and cursing the layer of your pants for stopping him from feeling your skin. Jun pulled you closer, to the edge of the counter, so that he could finally feel you pressed to him again, making his hands wander back up. He placed them on your waist, gingerly at first, as if you were going to vanish into thin air if he didn’t handle you with enough care. He still wasn’t sure you weren’t a figment of his imagination how you were sitting in front of him, hair and clothes messy from your flight, but your eyes shining so brightly he thought you were the most ethereal being on this planet. But when you bucked your hips forward against his, all that restrain flew out the window. He slid his hands lower from your waist, relishing in every inch of skin he got to touch along the way, before he settled them on your ass, encouraging your motions even further. Your arms tightened around him, one hand finding its way into his hair, the other toying with the collar of his t-shirt before slipping downwards and below the fabric to caress his back. He groaned, moving one hand - albeit reluctantly – away from your hips to tilt your head to the side. He was overwhelmed with your nearness, the swell of your breasts pressed against him, the smell of your skin filling his senses, spreading through him, expanding into every corner of his consciousness until all he could perceive was your presence, your breath, your skin on his.

You kissed him with so much vigour that he felt light-headed, the sparkle of your eyes encapsulated him, as if he was floating in space, surrounded by innumerable stars, twinkling around him. In his weightlessness, your hands were caressing him, still. You dropped them to the hem of his t-shirt, tracing along the exposed skin there as the rhythm of your hips never faltered.

You broke away, Jun following your lips with a whine. He wasn’t yet ready to leave your cosmos, but you pressed a soft hand against his chest, tugging his shirt off. Jun, personally, would have preferred to resume kissing you breathless right away, but you had other plans. Your hands returned to his chest, covering the expanse of his pectorals, gliding over the ridge of his shoulder, caressing every centimetre of skin while tracing the muscles across his torso. Every touch left a tingling feeling, pulling him deeper and deeper into your gravitation. His head was thrown back in pleasure, his eyes screwed shut while he tried (and failed) to even out his breathing under your attentive ministrations. When your hands returned to his chest and you flicked against his nipples tentatively, his head dropped forward in defeat, colliding with your shoulder.

He was breathing more heavily than he’d like to admit, as if he really was slowly rising through the atmosphere, the air becoming thinner and thinner. His cock was painfully hard, you grinding against it deliciously with every roll of your hips. Separated by way too many layers, Jun thought dimly before tapping against your ass, signalling for you to lift your hips off the counter.

You complied easily, leaning back in a way that allowed him to strip you of your comfy leggings. He watched you shudder at the feeling of cool marble under your skin, goosebumps forming at the sensation. Reverently, he let his hands glide up and down your legs, watching you shiver again, just from his touch. He hadn’t even realised that he had lowered himself down until one of your hands grabbed for his hair and tilted his head back.

Ripped out of his reverie, Jun stared up at you, towering over him, backlit by the kitchen lights. If it hadn’t meant leaving your reach, Jun would have fallen to his knees right this second. In this light, you looked like a higher being, come to cast divine judgement on him, a final reckoning. Jun found he would have taken any verdict, as long as it meant preserving your attention. He would have obliged any command, taken any punishment with equanimity. He would have taken Prometheus’ place, if it meant he could bask in your presence for another moment. He would suffer any acrimony, any scorn, any tribulation, if it meant your gaze would continue to rest on him like this – zeroed in on his face, your expression soft with adoration. He didn’t have to fear any judgment. The only thing written on your face was love. It was mirroring his own, he was sure, from where he was pleading for you attention from between your legs. You wouldn’t let him out of your sight, your fingers tugging at his hair with purpose. He angled his head, a miniscule movement, just enough to allow him to breathe a kiss against the inside of your thigh, a fluttering promise of continuation. If you let him. You loosened your grip, and Jun took it as the invitation that it was. His path mapped over the fat of your thigh, spilling over his kitchen counters, up one leg, down the other. All the while, he didn’t break eye contact, watching your expression crackle and slip, pleasure and frustration mixing in even measures as you breathed a plea, “Qīn'ài de, you’re teasing.”

His breathing became uneven, for just a second, at the term of endearment. You didn’t need to spell out your request. He could see it in the rise and fall of your chest, the sounds sneaking their way past your lips, the shifting of your hips – almost involuntary. The vision of you before him blurred as he tried to hear the rest of your declaration over the rushing in his ears. Your legs twitched under his hands; he didn’t remember when he had moved them there. But now they were here, holding your legs apart, leaving imprints in your flesh where they pressed against you. Jun searched your face for any sign of hesitance, any doubt, but he found none. All he could find was a sense of desperation clawing its way up your throat, leaving a blooming blush in its wake.

He still continued holding your gaze when he pressed his mouth to your core, pushing his tongue against the wet spot on your underwear. You gasped a little, hands twisting in his hair, the slight pain grounding him in this moment. His hands continued kneading your flesh, wandering, in feverish haste, across every expanse of skin they could cover. Above him, you writhed and moaned, his name leaving your lips as if you were now the one praying. Your head had tilted back slightly, breaking eye contact. But Jun’s gaze never left your face, drinking in every expression as he pushed your panties to the side to gain proper access to your sopping core.

“OhmygodJun,” you breathed, head lolling to the side when his tongue swirled around your most sensitive spot. One hand moved from your ass to your core, probing at your entrance just to feel you clench around him, hear the sharp intake of your breath. You tipped backwards, resting on your elbows as his name continued to tumble off your lips into the still air of the apartment. Jun’s other hand moved upwards, taking no care in pushing your sports bra out the way to grab at your breasts, pinching your nipples intermittently. He watched your chest heave as he slipped two fingers past your entrance at once, his tongue lapping between them, desperate to taste as much of you as possible. Your hands kept pushing him closer and closer, until his every sense was filled with you. Your taste on his tongue, your panting breath in his ears, the plush feeling of your thighs around his head. He moaned against your core.

Jun felt your high approach, maybe knew it was coming before you yourself even did, the way he could read your body in this moment, with how every fibre of his being was honed in on you and your pleasure.

“Jun, bǎobèi, I’m…”

His hand slid down to your waist, squeezing reassuringly. Jun felt you constrict around his digits, your moans growing louder and more desperate. He kept pressing his fingers into that spot that had you squeeze around him, kept his mouth sucking on your clit, humming at the flavour of you, until you peaked. You came with a cry of his name that made his chest swell with pride. Your thighs shut around his head like a vice, your hand evidently torn between wanting to pull him away and push him closer. Jun remained pressed to your core, lazily lapping at your release until your legs relaxed and he gained enough freedom of movement to lean back and search for your gaze.

Even though he had spent minutes staring at the ethereal picture of you earlier, he was still taken aback by your beauty: your hair even messier, your face blushed, your eyes glazed over in the hazy afterglow. He pressed another kiss to the inside of your thigh.

“How are you feeling, my love?”

It took you a few moments to answer him, calming your breath. A moment of which he took advantage to return to his full height, leaving kisses up your body on his way there. Once he was face to face with you, he brushed your hair out of your face, looking at you with devotion. You smiled back, softly, your arms wrapping around his shoulders and immediately causing a warm shiver to run down the length of his body. There you were, in his arms, gazing at him with love, bestowing him with whatever divine favour slumbered in your presence.

You leaned in closer, letting your breath ghost over his skin for a second before whispering, “I need you.”

Jun was sure he was about to malfunction. The way his body reacted instantly, unbidden, must have been proof of your power. He couldn’t suppress the groan that rose to the surface, betraying his helplessness in the face of you. But you only smiled, sliding off the counter, tossing your bra to the side, and leaning into him.

“I know you need me too, baby,” you susurrated against the shell of his ear, your hand falling to his crotch, smoothing over the outline of his cock against his sweatpants. Jun gasped when you gave his balls a squeeze, trailing your fingers back up, pressing them into his slit, already oozing with precum and staining his pants. He felt like melting, like he was Icarus and you were the sun, with the notable exception that your radiance was warm and welcoming. It didn’t burn him, it only made him feel soft, welcome, malleable. He melted at your touch, moulded himself to the shape of you.

Although Jun felt it was very much stating the obvious, he conceded, “I want you so bad.”

You smiled, discarding your panties in a swift motion, before turning around and bending over the surface.

“Then come get me.”

He only stared, transfixed by the way your muscles moved under your skin, how the warm kitchen light of his home cascaded over you, the way your eyes sparkled with mischief when you turned around to smirk at him. Jun’s mind was still fighting with the fact that you were real, you were here, and you were his. You cocked an eyebrow, watching him like a cat watched its supper. When he still continued to stare, your eyes darkened, beckoning him with intensity. You wiggled your ass at him, pushing it back so it grazed his throbbing dick. As you threatened to pull away again, Jun’s hands flew to your hips. You yelped at the sudden strength with which he gripped you, pulling you back against him once more, grinding down against your ass with such verve that your head dropped forward. A long groan escaped you as Jun crowded you against the counter, pushing you down and leaning over your back.

“You need me, huh?”

You nodded your head enthusiastically while meeting his thrusts, moaning his name again and again, and growing more breathless by the second. Jun wanted to tease you, he really did. He wanted to ask you how bad you needed him. He wanted to force you to be more specific, to hear you say how you needed to feel his cock inside you, hitting that spot over and over again. He wanted to make your pretty lips form all those filthy words, say his name, beg for him. But it had been months since he had seen you in person, it felt like an eternity had passed since his skin was last allowed to touch yours, a lifetime since he heard you whimper and moan and pant for him like this. So, he forewent any more teasing. Instead, Jun simply shoved his sweatpants and underwear down his legs, freeing his cock.

You whined at the sound of it hitting his abs, wiggling your ass again and breathing out his name in that way he would never grow tired of. He grinned, sliding his dick through your slick, nipping its tip against your clit, once, twice, three times. So many times that you whimpered, an indistinguishable string of supplications, whines of baby, please please please leaving your lips. Your forehead was pressed against the counter now, as if the cold, hard surface helped ground you in reality while Jun had his way with you.

When, finally, he slipped into you, both of you sighed. You voices mixing in the air of the kitchen that seemed to have been growing thinner by the second. Jun’s breathing was growing ragged, and he could tell you weren’t faring much better than him. He started moving, slowly at first, testing the waters and, yes, possibly also to rile you up a little more. But when you clenched around him, any self-control was thrown out the window. His hands on your lower back were shoving you down against the ice-cold surface, making you hiss. His hips snapping against your ass as he searched for that spot that would make you drool over the marble countertops.

“Fuck… yes! Baby, right there,” you groaned when he found it.

Jun leaned back down over you, his front pressed against your back, his hot breath by your ear, whispered prayers of your name escaping him. He drove into that spot relentlessly, repeatedly until you lost all function of speech, reduced only to swears and his name. Jun mirrored your vocabulary, one hand sneaking around your body to find your clit again and rub punishing circles. With the added stimulation of his hand, the pressure of his weight, and the way his cock was hitting that spongy part inside you again and again, you felt your pleasure crest alarmingly fast.

“Junjunjunjunjun,” you breathed, but, again, he somehow had known before you what was coming. His groans surrounded you, your perception narrowed to just the feeling and sound of him.

“Hold on a little longer, baby,” he breathed, and you barely registered it. Just nodding for the sake of nodding, praying his own release would find him fast.

“Doing so well, baby. So good for me,” he continued, almost to himself, baiting your release even more.

A few agonising, timeless moments passed until, “That’s it, let go. Come for me, baby. Come with me.”

Immediately, you released a sound somewhere between a groan and a whimper, you head falling forward again as your whole body tensed up. Jun followed your example, his head dropping against your shoulder as he drove his cock into you, prolonging both of your releases as much as possible, until the sensitivity forced him to pull out. He remained folded over you, so close that he could feel his cum drip out of you, landing on the kitchen floor with a small splat. The air felt too thin for any movement, so he remained draped over you, his thumb drew circles on your lower back until you returned to him, mumbling his name.

“Are you alright, qīn'ài de?”

You nodded almost imperceptibly, your hair sticking to the nape of your neck. Jun brushed it to the side, leaving a small peck where it had been.

“Nooo,” you whined, “I’m sweaty.”

“I don’t care,” he replied, matter-of-factly, smoothing his hand down your back one last time before peeling himself off you to get some tissue. His heart tore a little at the weak whine you let out in response to his absence.

“Don’t worry, I’m just trying to take care of you.”

You only whined more when he wiped the rest of your combined release from between your legs before also cleaning the floor. He caught your eyes from over your shoulder, smiling softly, and leaving another kiss on your back. After getting rid of the tissue, he pulled you off the counter, wrapping you up in his arms.

“You were amazing. I love you.”

He could hear the smile in your voice when you replied, “So were you, bǎobèi.”

“I can’t believe you’re really here…”

“I missed you something fierce,” you said by way of explanation.

“Me too. I miss you every day. Every hour.”

To his confusion, you smiled warmly at his pout, one hand caressing along the side of his face until it came to rest on his collarbone. You leaned in, lips ghosting against his in a silent promise, “Then let’s make the most of right now.”

Jun grinned, bending down to pick you up, laughing at the surprised yelp you let out.

“What on earth are you doing, Wen Junhui!”

“I think it’s time for a bath.”

“That is not what I was trying to insinuate!”

He wiggled his eyebrows, feeling his heart sore at your scandalised expression. Resting his forehead against yours, his eyes searched for yours, holding their stare for a few moments. With a smile on his lips and in his voice he murmured, “I don’t care what exactly we do in the bath, as long as we do it together.”

[yuri-is-online]

Hey, remember the soulmate au by tiyoin(?) I recently read your post abt idia and Leona reacting to yuu being their mates, but I wanna take it a step further since I saw idias line abt the family curse (this has yandere implications so if it's not your cup of tea please feel free to just ignore, nothing is outright mentioned tho)

What if yuu has a family curse similar to the aishi family in yandere simulator? (It's been years since I touched the game so if the lore changed I'm basing it off of 2018 ish lore, just with my own twist) basically yes, yuu CAN feel emotions, they're just muted and barely there. Given the right conditions (like falling in love or spending time with friends) and/or antidepressants they'll basically be like any other person, without them it's like a less severe version of the aishi women pre-falling in love

So, afab ppl born in yuus family, once falling in love, start losing their sanities and adopt yandere like behavior (stalking, increasing rage and jealousy, willingness to murder, etc) unfortunately this means they usually die young (20s or 30s) how quickly/young they die is based on their willpower (resisting the urges) and when/if they fall in love (so someone falling in love for the first time in their 40s and having insane willpower, caving in 20 years later in their 60s has more luck than a 16 year old falling in love and caving in almost immediately). Unfortunately everyone is a carrier, men carry the gene and can pass it to their daughters, but it only presents in the women/afab ppl, so transfems won't be affected but transmascs will.

What if yuu fell in love already (in their own world) and has just been doing a really REALLY good job at Resisting The Urges™️. Like, sometimes they slip up and cave in to anger or get ridiculously jealous, but they try their hardest to tamp down the feelings. Yuu has sworn off falling in love (again) and has given up their dream of having a big family bc of the curse, they're even distancing themselves from their object of affection in an attempt to "be normal again" at the cost of their own sanity.

So yuu gets transported to twst, and without their darling, they have the chance to be normal again, assuming they can get past the initial panic frenzy. Then the soul bond is revealed and they just go "nope. Not this shit again" and spouts cryptic messages about a family curse and swearing off love. I'm pretty sure most of the boys would feel a bit hurt by that lmao

This is mostly made for idia since his segment is what sparked the idea in the first place, but which characters from most to least likely do you think would try to pursue mc and figure out the truth to leave them alone and try to move on? I personally can't see someone like kalim giving up on both but I think the octatrio would try to look for the truth but be 50/50 on pursuing yuu or dropping them like a hot potato. Idia I think would try to relate to yuu and try to pursue them, but I think he'd probably be a bit put off once yuu starts dropping hints about the curse (he's a weeb so it won't take long for him and maybe Ortho to put 2+2 together and figure out the curse)

tiyon's soulmate au can be found here, their first post inspired some asks, which led to my own soulbound au the rules of which can be found here. Please support tiyon and interact with their soulmate au! They're a very creative blog and deserve the attention~ give them some reblogs!

so. uh. I got this ask when I first woke up and 1) very happy to hear from you Rose, always lovely to get a new ask and 2) yandere? sim? has lore? I did not think people actually played the game? help. i've fallen and misplaced my life alert. As a rule I don't really write for a Yuu who is just x character from y game/anime (it is in my rules) so while I was at work realizing I might be old I was trying to think of a way to do this that wasn't just yan sim (I wanted something properly gn) and I think I've got something? I am currently beating away the desire to info dump on you about the myth of Sigurd and Brunhilde (i could scream about that for hours oh god oh please i have written an actual au for that but efkjbekjrgbjrthnytrh) So here is the basic idea:

Yuu ran afoul of a witch in their world and was appropriately cursed. Given the myth I was inspired by I don't think Yuu did anything bad, but they still made the witch mad so they got cursed to lose all reason should they ever fall in love.

"You will be thine own destruction!" Cackles the witch and Yuu, who is actually normal unlike trey this person takes a deep breath and resigns themselves to researching a way to minimize the effects and maybe break it? They don't know they thought magic was fake until they thought they were just doing a favor for someone but turns out they pissed off Baba fucking Yaga.

They start to isolate themselves since they notice the curse starting to eat at them when they are around anyone the love; they consider going back to the witch and asking for further clarification but they can't seem to find them anywhere so they take some deep breaths and do their best to just be normal.

When they end up in Twisted Wonderland, and start feeling... weird. And it only gets worse when Crowley speculates that they might have been brought to Twisted Wonderland because they posses a soulbond.

And Yuu immediately freaks out because they don't want to kill anyone.

Now as for your question for who would try to pursue Yuu vs just leave them... well I don't really like writing un reciprocated feelings so I hesitate to say any of the cast would drop Yuu. In my au it isn't possible for soulbonds to not be reciprocated, and they are already sort of seen as a curse by mages so this... complication might not be normal but it isn't unexpected if that makes sense. Which would probably make Yuu swearing off love hurt even worse.

Kalim wouldn't want to abandon Yuu. Not ever, no matter how much of a danger they could be to him. Hell, he's willing to forgive people who are trying to poison him on the off chance they might regret it. But he is the heir of House Al-Asim, and I could see his dad paying someone to take Yuu out to keep his son safe. Something Jamil sees coming from a mile away and has to just keep quiet about. Something I can see Jamil feeling bad about, he might not like Kalim but you didn't ask for anything that happened to you. And yet the Asim's took your life from you anyway.

Have to disagree about the octatrio just a bit. Floyd would be into this. And so would Jade. But especially Floyd, oh hee hee ha ha his soul mate wants to kill him? Say less he is on his way to get his ass eat beat with an engagement ring in hand. Both he and Jade would be a little disappointed when the curse is broken and you aren't actively trying to kill him anymore... maybe you could try and poison him huh? Like old times?

I wrote 20 paper pages of soulbond au stuff for Azul so I will try to be brief here but... I don't think this situation would be one that made him try to break the bond. He has... complicated feelings about soulbonds already. If anything I could see him thinking he deserves this.

Now Idia. He's complicated. Pre-overblot he has given up on the concept of breaking his own curse, and I could see him feeling the same way about yours. Ortho on the other hand... even before he gets his soul he wants to help. After the overblot I can see Idia pursuing Yuu determined to find the truth and save them. Not that he wouldn't interact with them before that, he's a bit nihilistic so I can see him just making a bunch of jokes about the situation or promising to let Yuu kill him "after this next round." Or just straight up asking them to when he has to hit pity in one of his gachas. It's just cringe enough that it snaps Yuu out of the curse fog for long enough for the two of them to be normal around each other. And by normal I mean incredibly awkward

Anyway that's all I've got. Thank you for the ask ♡

[xo-cod]

OP plz i am o b s e s s e d with all the bg!Simon stuff u put out bc it's just so *g o o d*, it's my Roman Empire fr fr ✊😔😩🖤

On that note,, I'd love to see the 141 as their whole security team esp when popstar's made it really big, so reader needs /all/ the big burly men protecting her 🫣

-🔒

this was so cute!! i write this au just for you and the two other people that enjoy it frfr 🥹🩷😙 lmk if you'd like a more in depth version! :")

the way bg!ghost would see you getting anxious at the sight of his team. he might be the most biggest but his team certainly do not lack their own respective height and muscles 😮‍💨🫶

his first thought would be to immediately calm you down, he knows they all can look incredibly intimidating together

"s'ok, they're with me alright?" ghost's voice is gentle, soothing as he speaks to you

he needs a clear word to see how you are and where your head is at and when you start to warm up to the team, he's right behind you

soap, gaz and price are dressed in formal wear just like ghost, their muscles all but bulging and straining against their shirts.

a range of weapons are strapped to their waist, hidden discreetly under their blazers

each of them donning a pair of sunglasses, standing tall in their stance

you can feel ghost's hand touch the small of your back and usually under any other condition, you would've taken the time to appreciate how good it felt against you

but a set of three different eyes analyses your every movement, your breath held as you await the criticisms but there is none

to your surprise all three men crack a small smile, each one different yet almost tender in their own ways

"easy sweetheart, we're just here to help" gaz's voice is gentle, calm, trustworthy.

"yeah, you won't even know we're here hen" soap is next, removing his sunglasses as he takes a cheeky smile at you

"you'll be safe with us, we're here for your protection" price's voice is soothing, his deep voice echoing pleasantly in your ears as you take in all three men carefully

and once you get acquainted with them, you get along with all three fairly quickly

cue ghost getting jealous when you start going to them instead of him :(

but they're seriously intimidating, sometimes without even trying

whenever a supporter wanted a picture or an autograph, all four men were stiff and rigid around you. like four impenetrable walls, caging you inside safe and soundly

it was a nightmare to even use the bathroom alone

whenever someone calls your name, all four men snapping their heads so worryingly fast you'd fear they get whiplash with the way they turned

if paparazzi was harassing you, they'd just need one collective look from the 141 to back off immediately

the dominance each man exudes is different and dependant yet potent, you can tell they don't mess around with their job and the tasks they've been assigned <3

also when someone attempted to try and throw something at you, resulting in said object hitting ghost's broad chest and bouncing off to the floor in front of his feet. the man barely flinching through it all as he looked back up to the person who threw it.

ghost's eyes burning behind his balaclava, taking an intimidating step forwards

soap and gaz immediately grabbing the man by his arms, barely using any of their strength to restrain

"now you've gone and done it, huh" price chuckles but it's not the one you're accustomed to. no, this one was was sharp and cold. this meant business

and for all their hard work you, of course, spoil them. which also turns soap and gaz into little children opening presents when you get them something they had been dying for, pouncing on you for a hug

price chuckling and telling you that you didn't need to do this but you obviously bought something for him too. his heart melting as he looks back and forth from his present and then to you. bringing you in for a gentle hug and a forehead kiss

ghost watching with a roll of an eye but a hint of a chuckle, his eyes on you the whole time. though he thinks he's being neutral, you note how his pupils dilate when he's by you

for a look that's only reserved for you only, "that's my girl"

[alatushours]

☆ 3:27 AM, featuring xiao — even during the tough times, he’ll always be by your side.

contents. fem! sick + insomniac reader, hurt / comfort + lots of fluff <3 xiao calls you “angel,” reader is rather clingy, self indulgent, xiao takes a bubble bath with you bc he loves you sm ♡ tw. illness, nightmares, crying, and non sexual nudity. word count. 1.6k.

notes. hey um… i apologize if this was not what you expected during the holiday season but i am have been sick + incredibly stressed this month (∩ ˃̣̣̥᷄ ᴖ ˂̣̣̥᷅∩) so i kinda needed this… on the bright side, i am so thankful for all of the positive feedback on my previous post! it makes me very happy to see you all enjoying my work ♡

THIN BEAMS OF MOONLIGHT filtered through the curtains, illuminating your shivering form on the bed. it was several hours past midnight, yet you still lay wide awake, hair splayed across your pillow like a halo.

it’s cold, you thought, pulling the blankets tighter. why is it so cold? 

it felt freezing outside, yet your body felt like it was baking in an oven. that, and the dark visions swirling in your already throbbing head was enough to make you sob in misery.

you lifted your head slowly to check the clock on your nightstand. 3:27 am. 

you buried your head deeper into your pillow, as if that could take the pain away. oh, how you wished your lover was here. he always made you feel better, loved and cherished. 

as if on cue, the door clicked open and a lone figure stepped inside the room. 

“hey, angel,” xiao whispered. “i heard you call my name… are you doing alright?” 

you stayed silent. it would only trouble him if you told him about your condition. you didn’t want your boyfriend to worry about someone like you, not when he was already battling so much himself. 

unluckily, xiao seemed to be able to read your mind; or at least, he was awfully good at knowing when you were hiding something from him. 

“hey, don’t ignore me like that.” xiao made his way over to the bed, turning on the lamp on the nightstand before sitting next to you. “i know you’re awake, and something’s wrong. just tell me, what happened?” 

hearing his voice, so worried and gentle, was enough to make your determination break. you threw yourself into him with a sob, feeling his warmth envelop you as his arms immediately snaked around your waist. you started crying, confessing your bottled-up emotions to him. 

“i-i… my head hurts s-so bad a-and i can’t sleep and everything is j-just so hard right now and i can’t do th-” 

you were cut off with a soft kiss. it was short, just one peck on the lips, but it was enough to make you calm down just a little. your sobs slowly turned to sniffles as xiao gently stroked his fingers through your hair, whispering kind words in your ear. 

“shh, angel, it’s okay… i know things are difficult right now, but i’ll always be here… i’ll always be by your side, alright? as long as you need me, my love.” 

you nodded into his chest, burying yourself deeper into his warmth. “i… thank you…” 

“there’s no need to thank me. this is what lovers do, right? they look out for each other. you’ve cared for me so many times before, when i was injured or struggling with my karmic debt. it’s about time for me to take care of you.” he took one of your hands in both of his own, circling his thumbs over the back of your palm.

“now, is there anything i can do to make you feel better? a glass of water? some food? do you want me to draw a bath for you?”

“… a bath would be… nice…” you murmured. 

xiao pressed a kiss to your forehead. “i’ll get it ready for you, my love.” 

he started to stand up, but something triggered in the back of your mind, for you didn’t let go of him. “no… don’t leave me alone… i don’t wanna be by myself…” 

xiao sighed, but didn’t complain. instead, he picked you up, bridal style, and carried you over to your shared bathroom. he kissed your forehead again before setting you down on the toilet lid to fill the tub with nice warm water for your bath. bubble baths always seemed to make you feel better, xiao had noticed before, so he made sure to add extra soap to the water.

before long you were seated in the bathtub, which was filled nearly to the brim with bubbles. seeing you giggle at the sight brought a smile to xiao’s face, but he couldn’t help but still be worried. how did you deal with this when he wasn’t here? 

he’d discovered your insomnia a few months ago, and you’d assured him that you were used to dealing with it; but were you really okay by yourself? he’d seen the dark circles under your eyes. and the way you had broken down tonight… 

“xiao?” the sound of your voice brought him back to reality. “is something wrong?” 

he shook his head. “i was just thinking, darling. don’t worry about me.” he sighed, letting go of his doubts. “is your bath okay? do you want me to be with you?” 

you looked down at your hands, fidgeting under the water. “i’d like that, but… i haven’t been feeling well, and i don’t want to get you sick too…” 

xiao chuckled. “i’m a yaksha, love. i don’t get sick that easily.” he stood up from where he was, removing the mask from his belt. “just relax, alright? i’m here.” 

he undressed and joined you in the bath, foam swirling around his body. "come here, i’ll wash your hair for you," he gestured. you obeyed, making yourself comfortable by his side as he moved to grab the shampoo.

“it’s been a while since we’ve been together like this…” he sighed, feeling himself relax as he lathered the shampoo into your hair. “i missed doing this with you.” 

“me too…” you smiled softly, remembering how you used to wash his hair for him after he had a nightmare. funny how now it was you who was getting your hair washed instead. 

the feeling of his fingers massaging your scalp was soothing, as was the feeling of bubbles on your bare skin. 

xiao’s hands removed themselves from your hair, moving down to your back. a sigh left your lips as he massaged your shoulders. “is this nice?” he asked. 

“mhm,” you closed your eyes, leaning back against his chest. you both stayed like that for a while, held in each other’s embrace. you couldn’t stay there forever, though, as the water was starting to get cold. 

xiao got out of the tub first, quickly drying himself off before holding out a hand to help you step out. a big fluffy towel was draped around your shoulders, followed by a soft kiss to your temple. 

“did that make you feel better?” xiao asked quietly. 

you smiled. "yeah, i'm doing a lot better now…" you turned around, standing up on your tippy toes to kiss him. "...because of you. thank you, xiao." 

"of course," he replied immediately. "it's what i'm here for." 

he helped you get dressed in your pajamas, draining the bathtub and hanging up the towels before walking you back to the bed. "i know you said you were feeling better, but i don't want you to get worse tomorrow. i'm gonna get you some medicine, okay?" 

you hesitated. "y-yeah, that's fine…" 

xiao raised an eyebrow. "are you sure? the lamp will be on and i'll only be gone for a minute or two, but if you don't feel comfortable by yourself, i can take you with me." 

"um…" you looked around the bed, spotting your favorite rabbit plushie that xiao had bought for you as a gift when you first started dating. you grabbed it and hugged it close to your chest before nodding. "yes! i'm fine on my own, don't worry about me!" 

xiao chuckled, "that's my brave angel." he kissed your hand before standing up. "call for me if you need anything, alright? i'll be right back." 

he left the room, leaving you alone with your stuffed animal and the feeling of your lover’s kisses to keep you company. 

all was silent for a few moments. you were trying very hard to think happy thoughts; how grateful you were to always have such a loyal and caring boyfriend by your side. however, the darkness that lingered in the back of your mind were starting to push their way forward again. you squeezed your rabbit tighter as you tried to shake the thoughts from your mind.

 i need to be strong, you thought. for xiao. he’s been so brave for me, so i need to be brave for him, too. 

before long, xiao returned with your medicine and a glass of water atop a wooden tray. “i’m back,” he said, putting the tray down on the bedside table. “were you alright on your own?” 

you smiled at him. “yeah! it was a little scary, but i wanted to be brave for you.” 

“for me?” he sat down, measuring out your medicine for you. “you could’ve just told me you were scared, and i would have taken you down with me. come on, take your medicine.” 

you did as he said. xiao sat behind you, brushing your hair for you as you downed the bitter medication. 

soon after, you and xiao got ready for bed and climbed under the covers together. xiao pulled the blankets around your shoulders. “are you comfortable, love?” 

“mhm…” you mumbled sleepily. “can we cuddle?” he chuckled and pulled you closer to him. you laid your head against his chest, tracing the tattoo on his right arm down to his hand, which was intertwined with his other. 

“sleep. i’ll be here when you wake up.” xiao whispered. 

“do you promise?” 

“i promise.” 

“seal it with a kiss,” you joked. he did just that, pressing a kiss to your lips. 

“there. now go to sleep.” 

"okay!" you giggled and snuggled close to him. slowly, the doubts from earlier in the night started to fade. although the fear wasn’t fully gone, having your boyfriend by your side definitely made it a lot less scary. 

"good night, xiao. i love you." 

"i love you more."

ending notes. edit, i wrote the first authors note about a week ago so i am not sick anymore lol but i still wanted to post this for those who are needing a bit of comfort this holiday season <3 also just bc xiao and forehead kisses >>> i hc to be taller than he is canon lol but anyways, there will be some special holiday posts between today and christmas day, so look out for those :)

© alatushours 2023. please do not copy, modify, or translate my work in any way, nor upload to any other platforms. in the meantime, if you enjoyed, please like, reblog, and consider leaving a follow! it helps a lot ♡

[chuluoyi]

tw vent — a personal life problem. i just have to leave it here bc i’ve been crying for two days. it’s long… so feel free to scroll past it :’)

i’m… about to break up with my bf of 2 years

he’s a really kind person. and i don’t exaggerate it. he always makes sure to show me that he loves me through little actions like forehead kisses whenever we meet up, getting me a customized keychain with my name on it, getting me meaningful gifts and flowers on important dates unprompted… and every simple and little gift he gave me i have stored inside a box and there are so many i’m bawling whenever i look at them bc i’m so touched that a man who loves me really exists :’) he’s my prayers coming true. i used to pray for a boy who will accept me as i am and he comes at the perfect time near the end of my college year when i thought everything in this world was jaded

not only that he also spoils me, goes along with anything i say… he is serious regarding our relationship, introduces me to his parents and siblings. i thought i no longer have any worries about the future. and i can say i’m 90% content with my life now— a great job, a nice boyfriend, financially independent… my life is too good sometimes it feels scary

but there’s no such thing as a perfect life and i’ve dreaded it quite some time… because i know that both of us have been avoiding a certain issue just so we don’t burst our happy bubble… and now that issue has come to bite us

we’ve been in a LDR for two years and i’m honestly okay with it, but whenever questions about the future comes up—like “where should we live in the future?” i always clamp up bc for certain i want to live in my hometown, where my job, parents and social life are. but the thing is… he has his own thing in his city, where his parents reside and he’s the first son so he’ll inherit the family business there

i eventually voiced my worries about this to him, and do you know what his first reaction was? i was so sure he’d immediately get worked up and convince me to leave my job

but no. it never happened

he was so shaken. and yet… he never denied me. he said he’d talk to his parents about it… he said he’d be fine with this arrangement even if he has to be the one going back and forth. he said anything that would make me happy… he’d do it

and i believe him. until the end, i believe him. because he really means it even until the end

i’ve predicted it already. no way are his parents going to agree with this. i know bc just put yourself in their position—your bright first son has everything in order, set to inherit the family business, but he’s going to live a hard life of LDR only for some girl… that’s simply unacceptable

now you might wonder why i’m so dead set with living in my hometown. in chinese culture, when a girl marries, she usually lets go of everything and goes with the husband. but i really, really love my job here. i love the work i’ve been doing, community and friends i’ve made here, the salary and whatnot. not everyone gets a chance to work in my company bc it’s considered prestigious. working here gives me a purpose— i feel enabled here and i can be a part of something greater. i’ve won awards and i’m considered for a promotion too in just 2 years in this company, so it’s really hard for me to let go of it when i know i can be more than just a housewife. and so, whenever i imagine that i have to leave this company one day… i’m crushed

and not only that, my parents only have me. i’m an only child, and my father’s health condition isn’t the best either. i can only shudder whenever i think of them being alone if left them here

sometimes i think i’m too selfish for wanting this. for wanting to keep my job. for wanting to be with my parents. for keeping my social life. my bf is the one sacrificing energy and money twice a month to meet me in my city, and even then i still want to ask for more

but… i really can’t lie to myself and say it’s fine when it’s not. and what makes me cry even harder is the fact that when he finally tells me what his parents’ opinions are… he cries too and said all of these:

“i want us to be together. i feel so, so lucky to have met you. there are some days in which i thought that if you weren’t there… then it’d be much harder.”

“i’m always so happy seeing you all happy and energetic, doing things you love. i don’t want to take that from you.”

“if i make you go with me, i’m afraid that one day… you’ll regret leaving. i’m afraid you’ll be unhappy and tell me ‘if i’ve known this earlier… i wouldn’t have left at all.’”

it’s the depth in which he thought of all of these. i cried on the spot in front of him because… what have i done? what should i do? i love him, i really do but in the end, i can’t let go of everything for him either

and the cherry on top? he doesn’t even want to instigate the break up. he said everything is in my hands now. he wants nothing more than keeping our relationship, but he doesn’t have the heart to make me unhappy. even until the end, he says whatever my decision is… he’ll accept it even if it hurts

i’ve been crying since yesterday. it’s so hard to let him go when memories of the past two years pop up one by one. he’ll pick me up, hug me on hard days, tell me that i’ll do just well, adore me and make me feel confident in myself… he’s been a really great emotional support for me and i’m so, so grateful to have met him too

now we’re still in a limbo. i’m too shaken so i obviously am not able to tell him what my answer is. we agreed to think of this further and talk about our decision in 2 weeks, when he’ll come to meet me again

i don’t know what my answer is even until now. i know the best course is probably breaking up bc we can’t agree on this particular point… but it’s not easy, not when we still love each other this much

. . .

for any of you who have taken the time to read this until the end… thank you :’) this blog is the safest corner i have and i really don’t want to bring any sort of negativity here… but this time i’m just too sad with everything and i think i need a space to confide in💔

[endykelopaedia]

I'm privileged for a completely different facet of my identity that works differently than gender. I was born White and am White and there's no moving away from that. People are AGAB and the societally approved thing to do is to stick to that. Those who challenge their AGAB are all committing the same violation. I cannot offend society with my race but a trans man and a trans woman are doing fundamentally the same thing to piss people off. The cishetpatriarchy wants men to be men and women to be broodmares, and see a "man" wanting to be that which is hated and othered as repulsive, just as they hate a broodmare trying to put themselves on the level of (cis) men.

The funny thing about all this is that while I think the idea of AFAB trans people weaponinzing their AGAB is massively overblown, it IS totally possible for them to have conditional "privilege" in radfemmy spaces...because radfems see them as "female." I have no idea where the overwhelming and bias-inducing love for masculinity outside the cishetpatriarchy comes from. I just plain do not see it. I've never even heard anything but horror stories about relations between trans men and cis gay man.

And the idea that trans men are liked better by the cishetpatriarchy for wanting to be men is so flabbergasting it makes me see stars. Surely we don't think cishet men love masculine "women" or that women throughout history could have simply said they want to be referred to as men as a get-out-of-misogyny-free card.

A lot of times it genuinely seems to me like a lot of trans men who support this framework get gender euphoria out of living out this weird fantasy world. And it's honestly creepy? Like what I'm constantly reading into this is "I'm such a man I could totally have power over you and use it to abuse you if I wanted to but of course I never would." Like that does not make me feel good or safe lol! I've had multiple tell me that they believe in transmasc privilege because they themselves used to be transmisogynistic or partook in sOcIaL mUrDeR, which is a wild own goal to me because all the transmascs I know are hyper-vigilant about hopping on transmisogyny as soon as they see it.

Like, yes, you are a man! You are. I agree with that. But the material reality is that transphobes do not treat you like one and the queer community is much more divided and fractious in a way that does not really advantage one group in particular. Like a given space can favor transmascs but it could also favor transfems, and the only reason the latter isn't considered a problem is based on the tautological argument that they don't exist so the ones that do exist are NBD. Like, I could give you example after example of transfem-favoring queer people being absolutely unambiguously vile about trans men, but it always just gets No True Scotsman'd. No matter how many times it's provably manifest it's always shrugged off as an anomaly, or justified by the same thing being directed at trans women, which is a problem for transfems and not transmascs just because.

only a white woman could comfortably say that white privilege & gendered oppression work completely separate LMAO and yk what i dont think you even really believe that bc why would you immediately come out swinging about my supposed racism against black trans men (MYSELF) specifically over a post that only talked about male privilege.

i know damn well you have a barely coherent prose tucked away about the demonisation of black masculinity being proof of societal misandry that works out REAL well for you when you're arguing with other white folk. i didnt say it before but im gonna say it now, you dont actually give a fuck about black people and you should keep us out of your salty mouth. moving on.

you neednt explain the basics of misogyny, transphobia and cisheteropatriarchy to me. one thing i notice about a lot of you transandrophobia folks is you really like to over explain yourselves. wondering if overwhelming people with words works out for you usually. makes it easier to hide your blatant contradictions and terf-y talking points, yeah?

Like: "And the idea that trans men are liked better by the cishetpatriarchy for wanting to be men" "Surely we don't think cishet men love masculine "women"" is nasty work. this is whyyy i asserted we arent just he/him females to you under the first ask you sent me. cuz i KNEWWW you didnt think of us as men fr. that platitude at the end doesnt mean SHIT. i LIVE as a man & get treated like one. transphobes dont see me as one on principle but a) not everyone i interact with is a transphobe and b) transphobes CANT always tell. but none of that matters cuz we just innocent little girls with a dream, of course. how could we possibly perpetuate societal (trans)misogyny if we only women who want to be men, right.

i assume this is your response to the TERF talking point "trans men are only doing transitioning to escape womanhood & get a slice of male priviege" but it being "what do you mean? trans men will NEVER really be men or seen as men so how could they use it to get male privilege?" ??? plot is LOST. youve gone back to sounding exactly like them.

hopping from calling me racist against black trans men, to realising i am a black trans man, to calling me (and men like me) creeps for the SICK tboy fantasy that is being openly aware of my ability to perpetuate misogyny. wild. WILD. dont even know what to say to you.

i dont feel good around people who hold me hostage to tell me how bigoted (usually racist in my case) they used to be against me either. but the solution wouldnt be to surround myself around white people who dont got the SICK racist fantasy of holding power over me in this society, and it isnt to shut my ears and act like i aint capable of (trans)misogyny at all either? you really feel less safe around trans men who know know that they can be bigoted against you vs ones who dont? i mean. thats you, i guess.

since i'm not a he/him female i think id rather listen to trans women who arent she/her males on actual transmisogyny in queer spaces, bc something tells me your attitude towards it is different from most.

and god, please spare me your examples. i can just look at my actual life and draw smarter conclusions than you have.

[strawberrystepmom]

Kendall 🌚 if it isn’t too much trouble may I ask for a genken astrology reading? I’m not really familiar with his lore but I wanna know what your dynamic is & how you two love each other <333

🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 man thank you for asking I truly started tearing up thank you so much me when ppl care…anywho I hope you’re having a beautiful day my beloved nana <333

gen’s chart is the left and mine is the right. as you can see there are some pretty interesting differences, namely the amount of earth placements he has vs the amount of uhhh not earth or anything reasonable placements i have. at the jump i'm positive other astro girls will read this and go sheesh and that's fair. BUT my interpretation of this is that we move through life differently but when we're together, we bring out the best in each other.

also all of this capricorn in his chart makes me so wet. this man was literally born to be a leader. i feel this chart actually fits him so well. he's more hardworking than he would let people believe, he's blunt to a fault, he is a workaholic (again, even if he pretends he isn't), he's motivated, he will get shit fucking DONE when it's time to get it done and he does.

aldsjfla;sjdfkasjdf okay now that i've sufficiently glazed him i will do a full compatibility breakdown below!

we'll start with venus the big one for romance. my aquarius venus and his capricorn venus are a good match because i personally believe every air venus needs an earth venus to temper them and quite literally be the rock that holds their edges down like a picnic blanket lmfao....i need freedom but if someone offers me stability i will take it. he wants stability but craves freedom as a little treat and i'm happy to give him some if it means i can have my own. we balance one another out with a mutual understanding of the way the other works. he knows what he wants and will wait it out. i know what i want but want there to be a foundation first and he's willing to let that happen.

i also feel that our mars match ups are really strong. my leo mars makes me bold, direct, pretty roll with the punches and i don't get mad about much unless i feel my pride is threatened so i never take his spitting or mouthiness very seriously. he's a capricorn mars, so he's very direct to the point of it being almost hurtful sometimes even if he doesn't intend it that way. he can be a bit surly but the playfulness of leo and the tendency to use sweet words and touches and playing to people's egos easilyyyyy tempers him.

capricorn sun brings a lot of grounding to pisces sun. i tend to be a bit breezy, kind of anxious and out of it at times, and he can grab me by the shoulders and shake me out of my own head and he's good at it. a little "hey. get it together." works bc i know he doesn't mean it in a way that he's insinuating i'm a mess he means to climb out of whatever emotional hole i've managed to dig for myself and fix it. LURVE that about him.

gemini moon is curious by nature, something that can make a scorpio moon close itself off, but scorpio is also easily sussed out by people who are genuinely interested in them. i can glean pretty immediately that he is interested and wants to really know me so i give him little bits at a time. he takes it well and doesn't ask for more necessarily but asks me to explain my thoughts. explain my feelings. explain my world. let him in. he gets there eventually to see the true Thought Daughter beneath the feather cuffed sleeves.

so yeah!!!! i think overall we're pretty compatible. i like the way we balance each other out at the very least and tbh i'm sensitive but i know when someone Means it bc i am also intuitive so most of his bluster truly does not bother me. i like it. it's just a condition of adoring him.

[turniparts]

So... Life series winners as Omori characters anyone? Individual ref sheets and more info under the cut :D

Okay SO, for starters I will just say that I am biased towards Scott Smajor and that is why I made him the main character. However, I do believe that in the end he does kind of make the most sense for Sunny considering that everyone else fits better as the other characters imo. Also I used tints of blue instead of black and white bc drawing Scott in black and white just simply feels incorrect.

Anyway, Scar and Pearl are just 100% Hero and Aubrey respectively. A lot of Hero's character revolves around his charming personality, which he uses in headspace to get people to do him favors. I feel like this matches up with Scar's "too charismatic for his own good" schtick that usually happens in the life series.

Aubrey reacts to a negative experience where she was abandoned by IMMEDIATELY lashing out at everyone and becoming a social outcast, hanging out with delinquents. I don't think it's rocket science to see that Pearl, who reacted to negative experiences where she was abandoned by going crazy and lashing out at everyone, matches her character really well.

Going from there, Scott as Sunny makes sense because of his abandonment of Pearl in double life mirroring Sunny's retreat from Aubrey and his friends in how the latter reacted.

Then Grian as Mari because 1) Desert Duo(not necessarily romantic, just in how they are inextricably linked), and 2) He was the first winner and with Watcher stuff I feel like his character is best suited to Mari's role in headspace.

That left Cleo and Martyn as Kel and Basil. These two were the ones I debated the longest, because I feel like they both suit both roles. I went with Cleo as Kel because she's the one who stuck with Scott throughout every life series, like how Kel never gave up on knocking on Sunny's door.

Martyn and Scott were of course the mean gills, and Martyn won through attacking Scott despite all they'd been through together. Basil experienced the trauma with Sunny but still ended up attacking him in his fear. Plus with listener lore I feel like Martyn being the only other person to know the truth makes sense.

Also, whether you look at it in the celestial bodies interpretation(Grian Sun, Scott Stars, Pearl Moon, Martyn Mars, Scar Earth, Cleo Pluto) or tarot cards interpretation(Grian Sun, Scott Stars, Pearl Moon, Martyn Tower, Scar World, Cleo Fool), the omori characters also match up to those.

Sorry that was a lot of explanation for why I linked the specific characters I did. Onto the flowers! Scott as a poppy actually makes a lot of sense even w/out flower husbands, as it's a flower that symbolizes sleep, due to its use in sleeping gas, as well as death, which both match up with how Sunny acted in game.

Pearl is a Datura becuase of its ties to the moon(Moonflowers) as well as its other name(Devil's Trumpet) referencing her Double life character. It is also a very spiritual flower for many cultures, which ties into Aubrey and how she attends church.

Cleo being a succulent feels self explanatory, much like Kel's cactus in game they are easy to take care of and grow under many conditions.

Scar is lavender because of its associations with calming and devotion. Hero acts as the group's peace-keeper, and Scar with this role would do the same. It also has some medicinal properties like soothing headaches and having anti-inflammatory effects, which I feel fits well.

Martyn is a water lily because the season he won was the mean gills season, which I wanted to tie in. Their meaning being rebirth(which also matches the poppy) fits the way that Sunny can only face the truth after Basil nearly kills him. They also symbolize enlightenment, which again aligns with how Basil/Martyn is the only character to know the truth other than Sunny himself.

Grian is the red zinnia because firstly, I wanted him to have a red flower, and secondly its symbolism matches pretty well. Familial love, of course, represents how Mari(Grian in this case) was not only Sunny's big sister, but also acted as a sisterly figure to the other kids. While they are tough flowers, they also symbolize remembrance, pointing towards the death of Mari/Grian. I probably could've kept everyone except Scott and Martyn's flowers the same, but I actually had a lot of fun looking into flower meanings and stuff(sorry if it's not al 100% accurate).

I was honestly surprised with how many parallels I was actually able to find here. This really started as a silly thing I played with in my head because I enjoy both of these medias, but the more I thought about it, the more I went "huh, that actually does make sense", so now here we are.

@easily-distracted-by-fandom , I hope you enjoy the ramble. I also hope that I find more people who know what the heck I'm talking about lmao

Edited in an attempt to make this easier to read instead of big blocks of text lmao

[eddiediazismyhusband]

It was an interview full of "right now" and "at this moment" from both Ryan and Tim. I'm genuinely wondering why the freak out from everyone? Interviews are always, ALWAYS, answered and arranged for the current episode/arc. People do know that right? No one, even the PR dorks that are Oliver and Ryan, are ever going to say "so yeah, Eddie is going to propose to his girlfriend but have a near death experience near the season finale that will change everything and he will shout his love for Buck." That interview is literally never going to happen. And honestly him proposing makes a ton of sense from a story standpoint. It's technically everything he claims he wants, so how does Eddie react when things still don't feel right? If the storyline is headed toward a relationship with Buck, and it genuinely does feel like that, Eddie seemingly getting everything he's ever wanted and still feeling off is the perfect introduction to that. I'm stupidly stunned every time by the unhinged break downs after every fucking interview.

To be fair, anxiety is a very real issue for a lot of people (me being one of them, it doesn’t take much to send me spiraling) and in fact i am a catastrophizer… i see something and immediately jump to the worst conclusions about it and only then do i sit back and put thought into it.

I don’t like to post when i’m catastrophizing because all it does is stirs even more panic and anxiety, but others find it easier to post their panic/spiraling so that hopefully others may he able to offer a different point of view to talk them down from their panic. mental health is one bicth of a human condition.

so while yes, it is definitely jarring to see people panicking, i try to remain gracious to those who are spiraling because i understand the panic that sets in and the urgency for someone to tell you that everything is okay.

as far as knowing the ins and outs of how television and pr works; unfortunately a lot of people are not educated on how things like this go because we live in an age where weekly episodic releases like this are becoming less and less common as binge culture has become the hot commodity, especially for streaming services. with that there comes a level of misunderstanding of how the industry works and has worked in the past, especially for a younger audience. so a lot of viewers are used to having the whole story handed to them all at once, rather than the intensive speculation and uncertainty that comes with network tv.

i myself having worked in film and theatre have firsthand experience with PR and the media and how to keep things under wraps (i am by NO WAY an insider, i have worked on student/college/indie films and have had zero involvement in the commercial film industry) and i STILL sometimes struggle from that initial shock of reading something that seemingly doesn’t bode well for what you want to see from a television show.

so all of that to say is i understand it can be jarring and at times even annoying to see the catastrophizing and spiraling, but it helps me to step back and take a breath to remind myself to give some grace to people who may not have as much of an understanding of how things like this work as i do.

thank you for the ask anon!! Apologies for the long reply, i just wanted to discuss this bc i have a lot of my own thoughts on it! 💕

[notjennyfromtheblocked]

Im deliberately sending this off anon so you can see that you arent being 'attacked' by 'Anne', and the fact youre even discussing it that way is ableist as fuck. Im going to start this by making it clear, I have BPD, Im also trans and you will not be knowing my AGAB. You are the asshole in this situation.

We're going to start off simple, you are not an expert on BPD, google and tiktok is full of misinformation and harmful stereotypes about Borderline pplo. BPD is not an 'abusive person' disorder, there is no such thing as a condition that makes you an abusive person. BPD does cause intense, deep emotions that can shift quickly and be hard to control; often this includes having intense feelings for people around them and being scared of losing them/them not being who you thought they were. Because this condition comes from trauma (usually from family/relationships) there are often amplified feelings around abanonment and betrayals of trust especially from ppl you thought were your friends. It is in fact common for some of our nost intense lifelong interests start bc of stupid reasons, but starting bc of a stupid reason doesnt mean the interest isn't genuine. Have you never done something bc your friend wanted you too and you ended it up loving it? Why is it any different bc it was a crush not a friend? BPD doesnt make you a manipulative person, nor does it make you gaslight ppl and seeing as 'anne' has a psychiatric degree Im sure he understands his condition better than you do.

Secondly, 'Anne' is allowed to be trans in whatever way he wants too, she doesnt have to bind, or pack, or change his appearance for anyone. I have a beard, long hair, wear any kind of clothes I want, have tits, have bulge, am hairy and wear a full face of makeup. Some of those things are part of my agab, some of them a part of my transition. And its not a single iota of your goddamn business whether youre friends or not. Gender is a performance and you get to choose the outfit and 'Anne' is deciding what she want his to look like.

Thirdly, you do not seem to understand that part of the reason you very clearly show yourself to be the asshole is the way you speak about others. Describing being an introvert as being more sophisticated or above extroverts is just ridiculous, you are not superior bc you dont go out to parties. I don't either, I find them uncomfortable and loud, but that doesnt make me sophisticated. You talk about 'Mike' as if he cannot be the arbiter of his own interests or relationship, that hes just stupid and couldnt piece it together if 'Anne' was 'faking'. You talk about 'Anne' like she's some master manipulator but you did everything that happened to yourself, you went to the GC and convinced them that something was wrong, you took a group of ppl who didnt know 'Mike' to 'Anne's' house to confront him, you made a callout post about 'Anne' on facebook, you tried to immediately go running to 'Mike' for damage control when your 'intervention' didnt work and you are the person that blasted it all over facebook and now tumblr. And now you are the one losing friends and family, and you deserve it, because the ppl you convinced to attack 'Anne' realised wtf they'd just done and how fucking horrendous that is. You have no evidence of any manipulation, or that 'Anne' is faking, or that 'Mike' isnt happy, you just presented your prejudice. 'Mike' and 'Anne' realise what youve done and they have enough proof to convince a judge or they wouldnt have gotten that restraining order. You are the person behaving manipulative here and everyone can see it except you.

I've tried writing a response to this so many times but I end up deleting it because when I try to explain myself it just sounds like I'm going in circles. There are tons of other asks I've tried answering and rewritten like seven times each before giving up. I've been writing over and over trying to explain like how while yeah technically Mike never told me word for word that he was T4T, when he told me I wasn't his type and then like two days later came out as trans it felt very, very much like he was coming out specifically to let me know that's why I wasn't his type. Or how I was trying to explain how look I know it might be controversial but the constant "main character syndrome" of extroverts just gets on my nerves and is supremely selfish in general and also the truth is you're just GOING to be more intellectual if you spend your free time actually expanding your mind instead of smoking pot and grinding against strangers and how someone like Mike who prefers the same free time activities as I do is just not going to work with someone who would rather party and get wasted than pick up a book, or how Anne is pretending to be trans and I know this because she isn't changing ANYTHING, and I was going to explain that the group chat was full of people she didn't know because it initially was a fandom ship discord from a show she doesn't watch but eventually when I started getting concerned yes it kinda became my "complain about Anne" vent place because nobody there really knew her well enough to go tell her what I was saying and it was a safe place for me to vent and explain why I thought she was abusive and cheating and they would actually listen instead of tell me to knock it off like others, and obviously OBVIOUSLY I thought her and I were close enough as friends she wouldn't mind me using her spare key which she kept under the doormat so it's not like I searched hard. I've written all of that so many times to so many different asks I can't even count and then i just end up deleting it because it feels pointless to even try because I know people will just keep sending asks so why bother so I never wrote it til just now unless I deleted it.

Im gonna be totally fully honest here I woke up and I saw the 99+ notifications in my inbox and I haven't been able to stop shaking because I'm so fucking angry because nobody is on my side, I literally scrolled hoping to find at least one person who was agreeing with me and nobody was and honestly I was so mad I couldn't even see and then I finally found a couple of nice asks and they were signed and I was so excited someone finally agreed with me and when I checked on their blogs they were all fucking terfs. All of the people who were taking my side were fucking terfs. And like I'll be honest with you I have two very close family members who are trans and honestly they've both blocked me recently and even though I tried to contact them they didn't respond and I seriously hate hate HATE terfs because they've been so cruel to my two family members. And I'm so angry. But then I found your ask and at first I was so angry and I tried to reply but I just deleted it because I was getting angry. But then I found more terfs in my ask and then even more hateful anons from non terfs.

But then I kept thinking about how conservatives will literally LITERALLY have Nazis agreeing with them and dig their hills in and in like wtaf how are you not seeing that NAZIS are agreeing with you? But literally the only people agreeing with me are terfs. And honestly that's the last shit I want, I luterally hate terfs. I'm not even exaggerating when I say this is the nicest ask that WASN'T from a terf so I've just. I dunno. I am freaking out because this did not go the way I planned. I knew some people wouldn't agree with me but I thought it would be more split, like some YTA but mostly JAH and NTA. And then when I saw the poll for a hot minute I thought maybe it might veer ESH but obviously that isn't the case. It's just like have you ever really cares about someone, really really cared about someone, and he says oh please don't hug me and pulls away, and then other people hug him so you think I better tell these other people "don't hug him, he doesn't like hugs" and then he says its fine and then starts hugging other people but not you? And you realize at no point did he ever say he didn't like hugging, he just asked you, specifically you, not to hug him? Well imagine that but with Mike, and he stopped wanting to hang out with me and told me not to touch him but whenever I'd remind Anne not to touch him he'd say it was fine and I guess when he came out as trans it was just easier to believe he didn't date cis people than he didn't want to date me. And there were times I thought man I wish I were a trans person so Mike would notice me, and then it seemed like Anne was doing just that because of COURSE it crossed my mind to pretend just for a little while, because if he just gave me a chance he'd realize that we are compatible. Honestly I'm just freaking out because I made this blog a month ago after sent the ask to the aita blog but then it didn't get answered so I started the blog to get all this off my chest. And bam suddenly I was bombarded a month later and it took me a minute to realize the aita hadn't deleted it. Honestly none of this went according to plan and nobody except people I fucking hate want to hear my side. And I dunno. I just don't know. Bur if the only people agreeing me with me all day are terfs then obviously I need to think things through.

[runningfrom2am]

leave it to me to make a 18-point commentary on a 2.8k oneshot 🤭

10. "Yes, well... we have never been well liked." i really like how this comes out as if she really has spent time thinking about where they went wrong and trying to rationalise it. also i don’t if it was intentional on your part but this adds to her not getting over being retired as the head gamemaker because of people.

11. it feels like they weren’t allowed to be together, until her last night, following the days of coin’s takeover, she is looking out to her garden but at the same time, to her husband. also she is given the chance of staying in her bedroom but he is down with the roses and the raspberries.

12. her pride and the fact that what sejanus is asking of her is an act of betrayal by her definition are the greatest obstacles that stand in the way of her survival but as the one who believed in and actively tried to observe “humanity unmasked” she knew taking the offer was the only way for her to go.

13. her realising that she is alive by luck and past impressions, just like sejanus, must’ve been chilling because not only it breaks the illusion of power she had at the time, but while sejanus was spared, she was left alone and those two are very different.

14. “Were you really any better than him?” i want to believe you didn’t tell him that you had killed and buried sejanus so thanks to the power of important details, you are, in this sense.

15. i hope nothing bad happened to their kids but at the same time it doesn’t seem likely for them to not have partaken in the games at all, considering the ages. maybe they didn’t get executed thanks to the mockingjay.

16. HER FINAL SALUTE!!!

17. the fact that coin probably let her go by the condition of carrying her plan of hurting snow is very in character, he couldn’t have known about the celebration beforehand.

18. he mourned the death of his love twice and at both, she was alive even if meant to be dead. her “deaths” could be traced back to him by a very thin line, in his knowledge but her real tragedies were having to leave everything she has known behind.

NO BC AS YOU SHOULD AND I AM EATING IT UP i love talking ab this so pls do haha

10. okay yes and that was NOT intentional but i do love that it makes sense. in hindsight you’re totally right (not us just talking ab things that are canon to this that just aren’t in the fic hahah)

11. absolutely coin demanded they be separated immediately. bc SO MUCH of their power was power they shared- they did it all together, so separating them (and no doubt publicizing this somehow) is the first signal to the rebellion and the districts that it really was over, they won. even though few people know this, it is a massive accomplishment on their behalf to even be able to separate them bc of their history of what they have done just to stay together. including but not limited to: coryo risking r’s life for the chance that she would be sent away with him, killing mayfair, sending the recording of sejanus (bc if he left he would leave them to be executed “just for knowing him” and also he would be putting a SPOTLIGHT on where r had been hiding), and even allegedly killing lucy gray. (and by few people who know this, i mean sejanus and lucy gray who no doubt shared these stories to some in 13.)

12. she tried to fight it, but deep down she knew she couldn’t really say no. her “conditions” were a final act of power that she could really have, to convince herself this was a smart decision. yes she was betraying her husband, but she made sejanus promise that their granddaughter would not be harmed. maybe she even negotiated to get custody of her while she is in hiding. so it was a betrayal, BUT she had several reasons.

13. YES and same thing i mentioned on the last one about her conditions applies here.

14. oh absolutely she is nowhere near as guilty as him, but that’s hard for her to believe because of how extremely highly she regards him even then. she almost wanted to find more blame to place on herself so they were still level.

15. we can hope not, but like you said considering the ages, i think they have done some unforgivable things too. i think r and coryo know that as well.

16. i cried while writing it bc ✋ shut up it’s so sad

17. oh for sure. but ALSO can we consider the possibility that she didn’t even know? bc what we do know is that many of her higher ups knew that she wasn’t much better than the previous presidential couple. when katniss shoots her, plutarch is smiling bc that’s what needed to happen and he knew it. i think sejanus and lucy gray didn’t like her either, so it’s entirely possible that they hoped this is what katniss would do, maybe she even told lucy gray that that was her plan. it’s not too far fetched to guess that sejanus could organize this without coin’s knowledge. coin would love the idea of hurting the president by having an over the top celebration about his wife’s murder, but would that be worth letting her live? maybe not. idk just something to think about haha

18. I KNOWWW IM SO SAD FOR HIM TOO. HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW. she’ll be grappling with that decision for a long time knowing that AGAIN he is grieving her death, but this time he will never find out that she is still alive.

[invinciblerodent]

I know this is a hardish question bc probably depends on game factors, but as it is rn you the brain sauce

Do you think Emmerich notices right away that Tristan isn’t alive in the same sense as pm everyone else? Or is he like quicker than others to notice? I assume Tristan isn’t quick to explain the full truth of his… condition.

(Sorry if I seem obsessed, bc I kinda am. I blame my adhd for the hyperfixation. Love the whole idea! )

Oh absolutely no worries babe lol, I'm just happy that you find the big fellow interesting! ❤️❤️

Have a song I've been listening to a lot over the past few days and have kinda started associating it with him-

(this, as well as "Ghost" by the same guy, very Tristan-coded to me, only this one also has that soft, deep-voiced crooning in "Orlesian" in the middle there that's. Very A+.)

I honestly feel a bit more "free" headcanoning and rambling on about this guy and this story than about anyone else, specifically because the base idea is kind of on the sillier side? Like, I feel fairly confident ~~hazarding a guess~~ that there's not going to be a subplot in the actual game about the main character needing to hide that actually, they're kind of, sort of a zombie, lol.

So while I'm intentionally keeping my girls vague (beyond "very autistic bisexual elf rights activist", "viking pirate lesbian(?) dwarf", and "tiny dommy mommy"), I'm like, fairly sure that I was gonna need to do extensive rewrites and annotations to the game to make this one work anyway, so I'm not super concerned if I end up needing to "retcon" something I think about now.

What I was thinking so far is that Tristan, as of the beginning, could count on one hand the number of people he's told about his "condition" over the past two decades, and of those people, he's not sure if there's even one still left alive. (Maybe a fellow Warden healer, someone who's patched him up enough times to catch on that something is fishy? Maybe the longest and most serious relationship of his adult life that ended tragically one way or another? I'll have to brainstorm that one)

So as a Grey Warden, Tristan spends a lot of his life traveling alone (which suits him just fine), and quite often, the preternatural survivability and even the unusually thick blood can be reasoned away with "it's a Warden thing, don't worry about it, we're all like this". Most people will believe it, and aren't very quick to jump to conclusions that shouldn't be possible.

Except maybe those who are intimately familiar with death, spirits, and the undead. And are, yknow, actual professors of the occult.

So I think it's not exactly a closely guarded secret, but one Tristan wouldn't reveal unless absolutely necessary- and for as long as possible, none of the companions would know, but Emmrich would absolutely suss him out on his own.

Regardless of whether there's been any light flirting before then, I like to kind of imagine there being a singular moment --perhaps after a hit taken too close, maybe in defense of him, when the odd, stale, almost slightly mildewy scent of Tristan's blood hits Emmrich's nose the first time-- when their eyes meet, and there's this Moment of mutual recognition. This "oh shit, I know what you are."- "oh shit, he knows what I am.".

I of course don't know, like, the particulars of his character, but from his tone in the blurbs and the short stories, I assume that if pulled aside afterwards and asked sincerely, Emmrich would be willing to keep it a secret- and that he would immediately feel intense scholarly interest.

I mean, Tristan is an anomaly: by all means, he should not exist. The undead of Thedas are created via possession, and his body has not been possessed by any spirit, and isn't being controlled by anything. He seems whole, hale, and himself (not a darkspawn, either), he breathes, eats, sleeps, heals and bleeds pretty much as normal, and the things that aren't quite normal, are still not outside of the realm of possibility: many completely normal people breathe and blink slower than average, many people prefer their meat on the rarer side, many people have troubles falling and staying asleep. Nothing about him on its own is indicative of anything strange, and yet he is intelligent undead! Just the fact that he can speak in a way that is convincingly human is incredible!

I want to believe that Emmrich (like many of us are about our blorbos) would immediately kind of be like "I want to study you under a microscope." (paraphrased ofc) (Is he the playful kind? Would he jokingly paint studying Tristan as repayment for his silence? Who knows! It's fun either way!)

And at first, Tristan would be hesitant (it's awkward, to be under such scrutiny, and to have his whole Situation upended and dissected like that, especially by someone he probably already considers somewhat intimidating, in a handsome, charming sort of way), but even if it's not suggested, he'd consider it repayment for keeping it a secret, and agree. And if I can make it work, I'd really enjoy for there to be an opportunity for a moment between the two of them that has Emmrich kind of like... "I have been around enough bodies, both dead and alive, naked and clothed, to not be affected by anything corporeal. I know flesh well, I know what lies under it, and my interest in this particular body is purely clinical, scholarly, and in no way romantic or sexual. This dimly lit office/surgery is not in any way romantic, nor does any sight of his body arouse anything in me. .......... oh, his nipples are pierced. That's not a good thing for me."

("oh, strong muscles shifting enticingly under inked skin." "oh, the big man is large in every way." etc.)

Something something hearing an otherwise abnormally sluggish heart suddenly beat faster at a touch, something something intense examination of all bodily reactions making them both feel both flayed and more naked than it should be possible, intense eye contact, oh in this kind of light his eyes do look reddish and eerie but I can't look away, and from there on I think it can kinda progress however it's going to progress in the game.

I am havign SUCH a normal time of it, man!!!!!!!