#bc I really wanted to get him ANDI thought he was just in the limited banner

[cerealmonster15]

Cereallll i hope ur doing well!!!! eats ur art.

Bendfbngnnhtjrndb

thank u ‼️‼️‼️ I’m putting this caycay doodle here as a ward of protection so I don’t get eaten too 🙏💕

[goldenfox3]

I can't find my old post about game Falcon and Stewart's Pokemon teams but I've thought about some new teams for Andy and Robert this time ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Andy:

Braviary (shiny): well we have to give him his blue not-a-Falcon right. It's noted to be able to carry cars. Falcon Flier (literal bird)

Salamence: bc of Andy's "creatures with wings"/"don't be afraid to grow up" quote and how Bagon dreams of having wings and then finally gets them when it grows up.

Boltund: from his Galaxy Police days. Fast, enduring, loyal, and electric type ties into the way I associate Andy with electricity more than fire bc of the possible cyborg + what I see as electric effects in his Falcon Punch (vs Doug being associated mostly with fire but minorly with electricity).

Floette (red flower): red salvia…I also just wanted to give him some small cute Pokemon to contrast the big dramatic ones.

Quaquaval: blue bird martial artist. I also think Andy would enjoy its flamboyance lol he acts mild and unassuming but he is really such a showman. I had Roserade on his team initially because of the whole masked gallant thing and I think it could also fit.

Minun: another electric type, one that cheers for and supports others. But also I really wanted him to be twinsies with Rob so I gave him the blue one bc Blue Falcon lol.

Robert:

Ninetales: he's gotta have the golden fox Pokemon is that even a question. I know there are more fox Pokemon but I feel like anime Rob doesn't go as hard on the fox association as game Rob with his fox hair and eyes lmao. Thus I limited it to Ninetales this time.

Audino: and of course he needs to have his doctorly Pokemon with the ability to assess feelings and physical condition along with heal others

Indeedee: a serving Pokemon that dislikes conflict and can sense emotions. I'm really drawing on the differences between game and anime Rob here—obviously game Rob is also a doctor and well-liked, but anime Rob is a vice commander and actively still in medical service as well as more of the supporter and peacemaker of the team compared to game Rob's more confident and bombastic personality.

Comfey: can soothe others and help with treatment with its scent, but I also picked this because the idea of Rob giving it the salvias Andy gave him to preserve them after his death (his fake death or his real one) is 🫠

Iron Hands: the odd one in this team, but I wanted to have a Pokemon related to Rob's cybernetics work and a Pokemon that’s potentially a cyborg itself? Yeah. It is a Paradox Pokemon though so like for a Pokemon that would be normally easier to access I would probably put Electabuzz (electricity generation) or Alakazam (psychic powers, intellect) or something to be an assistant in Rob's robotics work.

Plusle: this one is self indulgent again yeah but I really do think a cheering and supporting Pokemon who does better in a team suits him. Electric type is a bonus though I don't think it can generate electricity on the degree of Electabuzz or Electivire lol. Rob has the red one bc red scarf.

[ofmermaidstories]

ok so here is the thing. and im going to be dead serious instead of weaponising merms silly hours so, if you’re still here and haven’t been chased away by the spam then thank-you for your patience as u bear with me a little longer as i plead my case. 🥺🌷

the premise is fairly simple, at it’s core: reader-insert gets swept up in a quirk accident in front of bakugou, and ends up in an alternate universe with a different (fantasy) version of the man she was literally just standing next to. they can’t understand each other, but this version of bakugou is like, 🙄, and begrudgingly looks after reader-chan as she desperately tries to find a way home/reversal of the quirk.

meanwhile, pro-hero bakugou is losing his shit. 😌 like, he and reader-chan weren’t a thing, but maybe there was, y’know… something there. 🥺 and then we just—disappeared!!! right in front of him!!!!!!!! it takes several fellow pros to eventually wrestle him away from the agency (under duress) after the first 72 hours of our disappearance. 🥹

so here are some things to keep in mind:

🌷 i’m harassing andie about writing this lmao but if at any point she was like “i don’t find this funny anymore” i’d stop, bc she does in fact have a sizable WIP list, with incredible ideas that i think we’d be lucky to be granted. 😩 i do, in all seriousness, believe that andie could take this idea and do incredible things with it, but alas…. the struggle of being one person and having a dozen or so different fics in mind screaming at u is very real. 😔

📝 when i say that i think andie could transform this idea i mean it very simply: i’m sure others would agree with me when i say that there’s a bright, colourful tone to all of andie’s fics. like we as readers are always kept so safe within their worlds. you pretend to be a boy to sign up for the army to send money back home, and you find the love of your life and hot sex. you’re a overworked assistant for a demon of a model who insists on pushing every one of your buttons and who then decides to really test your limits—and your attraction to him. you’re a student, working your way through college with a cleaning job and during it you’re kidnapped, rescued by the frosty owner of the apartment you were just scrubbing down. like!!! these are all stressful situations. but never once are we in danger. 🥺 we’re always protected. we’re always, immediately, a keen subject of interest. and it’s gratifying!!!! i think between that and the way that andie writes the very tangible physical attraction between her reader characters and her love interests that she could do some incredible magic with a fantasy bakugou who can’t understand us, but wants to protects us—and with the pro hero bakugou who’s waiting for us, back home. 🥺

🔎 i did originally try to sell it with a bakugou POV LOL, but i don’t think it’s necessary for the premise to work, or be rewarding. 🧐 i think with andie’s focus on physical chemistry, you could easily rely all his worry and fear for reader (for having seen reader disappear in front of him) by having him grab reader-chan for a desperate make out LMFAO. which!!!! as i keep trying to emphasise!!! is well within andie’s realm of expertise!!!!!!!!

anyways. that’s my argument. 🥺 i just…… thought it would be fun………… 🥺

i have a great idea and i’m trying to convince @andypantsx3 that she needs to write it bc i think she would do it soooo much justice. 🥺 it would be so fun and sweet and satisfying if she wrote it. 🥺 but she WON’T because she HATES ME and she doesn’t want me to have ANYTHING fun or nice 😭‼️

[babyjakes]

as far as she'll go.

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

event | kinktober 2021

prompt | fisting

summary | andy has a new way of testing your limits and seeing just how far you’re able to stretch.

pairing | daddy!andy barber x little!reader

warnings | ddlg (daddy!andy little!reader), restraints, fingering, squirting, multiple orgasms (one is forced), overstim, eventual fisting, uhhh dubcon ig bc it becomes too much for reader but andy keeps going, andy being hot as hell and unapologetic about it, praise kink, some mocking/degredation, bits of aftercare

word count | 1,907

an | it’s been a while but!!! here is the eleventh kinktober fic, and oh boy is this one something else :’-) i’ve never experienced fisting (and i probably never will lmao i am too scared) but something about the thought of soft!daddy!andy brutally forcing his entire hand deep into your tight little cunt is just,, , yes. need that. hope you all enjoy!

“Please Daddy, n-need it, need you,” is all you can beg as you tug at the smooth satin bonds holding your wrists and tucked legs in place, unable to move in the slightest thanks to your daddy’s skillful knotwork. He’s got you flat out on your back against the silky white sheets covering your bed, your knees bent sharply and spread wide leaving you completely exposed to whatever he’s planning. And judging by the way he’s towering over you as he rolls up the sleeves of his white dress shirt, muscles bulging against the firm fabric as he flexes slightly, rolling out his fingers, this isn’t looking good for you. It’s looking very bad, in the very best way possible.

“Look so good spread out like this, sweetheart,” Andy hums contently as his eyes settle on you, soaking in the stunning sight of you naked and restrained before him. Puffing out your bottom lip in a needy pout, you whimper, causing the dark-haired man to coo in pity. “Oh, and would you look at that- seems like you’re already making a mess,” he shakes his head with a light chuckle as he notices your arousal already dripping down onto the mattress below you. “Well, that’s okay, princess. Daddy was already planning on it being quite a messy night.”

Kneeling down in front of you, Andy settles himself at eye level with your glistening heat, his hot breath against your aching skin sending shivers up your spine and neck. “P-please Daddy,” you mumble weakly, bottom lip trembling as tears build in your eyes. Though you’re humiliated to admit it, your need for him has brought you right to the brink of collapse, the thought of his hard, throbbing cock filling you up almost enough to send you over the edge all on its own. But little do you know, your daddy’s got much different plans for you tonight- much bigger, though that might be hard for you to imagine.

“I know, honey. I know,” Andy croons sympathetically as he brings one of his large, warm hands up to rub tenderly at your inner thigh, the closeness of his masterful fingers to your soaking cunt enough to tear a whine from your drying throat as you struggle to shift your hips, needing him just a little lower, a little to the left…

Smiling, Andy takes some pity on you, trailing his fingers down slowly to settle against your pool of slick. “Look at that, so needy for me, aren’t you, baby? Daddy really get you this excited?” he asks as he taps a finger into your puddle, pulling back to string out your wetness in front of you. “Well, no need to worry, sweetheart. Daddy’s gonna take good care of you. Gonna give you everything you want and more, how’s that sound, hmm?” he hums as he slides his first finger in with ease, the action eliciting a deep moan from you as your head falls back in bliss, a muffled “thank you” rolling off your tongue as you enjoy the feeling of your daddy filling you at last.

“You’re welcome, honey. Such good manners- my good girl, my sweet baby,” he murmurs in praise as he begins pumping gradually in and out, the pad of his digit finding your soft, spongey ceiling with ease. Bringing his other hand up, he gathers a bit of slick on his thumb, gently pushing up on your mound to rub at your aching clit in agonizing circles. Whimpering at the attention to your favorite spot, your toes curl slightly as you see Andy smiling through half-closed lids. “There, just like that,” he soothes lowly as he adds a second finger to thrust in and out of you, a deep burn beginning to build at the base of your gut as you feel your first orgasm quickly approaching.

“Please Daddy, please- c-can I cum?”

Quickening his ministrations over your hardening bundle of nerves, Andy nods, his fingers now slapping steadily against and into your dripping folds, the lewd sounds of your wetness filling the room as he hums, “Go ahead, sweetheart. Come on, cum for me.”

With a pathetic cry, you do, your pussy clenching down in a death grip against Andy’s fingers as he works you through your high, only slowing down when he sees your contractions settling, though his hands don’t leave your heat. Instead, as you struggle to catch your breath from the intensity of the ordeal, you can feel something stretching you out even further; you gasp when you realize you’re now taking three fingers inside of you. “D-Daddy, I-”

“Shhh, be a good girl and take what Daddy gives you,” Andy’s smooth voice cuts in over you, carefully working his three middle digits in and out of you as you strain against your bonds. “Know you must feel so full right now, princess. You like that, like it when Daddy fills you up with his fingers?”

Still startled and slightly confused, you only manage to nod, earning a smile from your daddy as he rubs carefully over your now fully exposed clit. “And look at your little button, baby. So swollen and sensitive now, isn’t it?” Giving another nod, you watch as the man continues to finger-fuck you slowly, his unclear intentions setting you a little on edge. Andy knows how tight you are, that’s why he rarely ever makes you take more than two fingers. But now all of a sudden he’s given you three, and without even the slightest warning.

“Love seeing you all stretched out like this,” Andy groans, the hunger shining in his eyes unmistakable as he works up his pace a little, the fullness creating a new bubble of warmth rising up within you. “There, that’s a good girl,” he praises as he sees your growing pleasure, “gonna stretch you out as far as you go, princess. Wanna see you cumming around my fist, pretty girl.”

Eyes widening in horror at the man’s words, tears spring from your eyes as you begin to plead, “No wait, Daddy- please, I-I can’t take it, gonna be too big- can’t take your fist!”

“Shhh sweetheart,” Andy hushes you as he rolls his thumb over your clit a little faster, the pinky of his other hand beginning to strain against your opening as you struggle to stretch any further. “That’s it, there you go. Know it’s so much, baby, but you’re doing so good for me. Just focus on how nice it feels when Daddy rubs your clit, hmm? Know how warm and fuzzy that makes my little girl feel,” he does his best to distract you as he now works all but his thumb through your burning channel. “There, you’re so close, honey. You gonna cum for me again? C'mon, wanna feel you squeezin’ me.”

With his slick hand plowing into you while the other masterfully works your hardened nub, it’s not long before Andy’s brought you to the edge of another mind-numbing orgasm, your limbs feeling like they could snap your bonds into shreds as you wail out in overwhelming pleasure. “Good girl, such a good fucking girl,” Andy curses as your body spasms, coming to a stop over your clit as you ease down from your climax, fingers still filling you up in the most brutal and delicious ways.

“Please, please Daddy,” you pant, shaking your head desperately as you lock eyes with the insatiable man. But your words do you no good in changing his mind; face contorting in concentration and strain, he continues to slam into you, a throaty cry rising within you as you feel him forcing the rest of his hand to fit into your tight passage.

“Fuck,” Andy growls, the feeling of you completely swallowing his fist sending blood surging straight to his tightening trousers. “Just like that, baby. Look so fucking hot like this, taking my fist up this tight little cunt. You feel me in your tummy, baby? Feel me all the way up there, fisting your guts?”

Though the entire situation is more than anything just agonizing, to your surprise and complete dismay, you find yourself once again working up to a steep precipice; something about the feeling of your daddy so sinfully deep and huge inside of you, stretching you out to your absolute limit, undeniably does things to you, though you’d never admit it to him yourself. Noticing the look of betrayal on your face as you do everything you can to keep from falling over the edge, Andy grins darkly at you, singing out in a mocking tone, “Oh, and what’s this? You gonna cum again for me, sweetheart? You gonna give me one more, let me feel you clenching down on my fist as I fuck you with it? Such a filthy little girl, getting off on her daddy fisting her.”

“N-no Daddy,” you try to deny it, more tears pouring over as your tummy trembles in anticipation.

“Oh sweet girl,” Andy chuckles at your small act of defiance, quickly diminishing any resistance left within you as he resumes his thumb over your clit, giving you a knowing smile as he hums, “I know, honey. Know you’re so sensitive there now, you won’t be able to help it if I keep rubbing you like this, hmm? Poor little girl, all tied up taking Daddy’s fist, forced to cum until she just can’t take it anymore. I’m so cruel, aren’t I?”

“Mmmph… D-Daddy…” you grumble as you feel the inevitable arising within you, a loud sob escaping your lips as your final orgasm tears through you with incredible force.

“Theere, good. Good, sweetheart, such a good girl for me. I know, let it out,” Andy soothes lovingly as you squirt out against his forearm, all mocking and demeaning now absent from his tone as he coaxes you through your high. His thumb continues to work in hard, fast circles until your muscles have unclenched, your breaths staggered as you struggle to ease down from the intensity.

“Shhh,” the man whispers gently as he eases his hand out of your now gaping hole, quickly grabbing the box of wipes from the nightstand beside him and cleaning himself off before promptly returning to his spot between your legs, his heart aching a bit when you whimper in fear and discomfort. “It’s alright, honey. All done, you did so good for me, baby. Just gonna get you cleaned up a bit now, okay? Daddy’ll be gentle with you, know you must be sore after all that.”

As your eyelids droop heavily, a low shudder runs through you at the cold feeling of the wipes being run over your tingling sex, though at his point your heart is slowly returning to a slower and steady pace, a warm sense of safety falling over you as you trust your daddy to take care of you.

“You still with me, sweet girl?” he asks after a few minutes, causing you to look up at him carefully, earning a mild smile. “There she is, hi baby. I’m just gonna go start the bath, okay? Then I’ll come right back and get you. Think you’ve earned extra bubbles for tonight, how’s that sound?”

“Mhmm,” you simply nod in agreement, “thank you, Daddy.”

“Of course, little one,” Andy hums as he rises to his feet, leaning down to plant a kiss on your forehead as he whispers, “anything for my good girl.”

[chrisevansgoodgirl]

i need you to come here and save me, i'm your little scarlet, starlet, singin' in the garden

summary: (was supposed to be a christmas chapter, then a valentines chapter, now i guess it’s just fucking late, w/e don’t mind me) but anyway...reader has schemes, andy’s an angry and worried daddy

warnings: angst. but smut and a little bit of fluff, too. bathroom sex. oral. choking. belt. spanking a little. weird sex that i don’t know how or why i thought of. s p i t t i n g  (bc i’ve been a weird hoe lately)

word count:  a little more than 12,700

pairing: andy barber  x reader

a/n: part 1, part 2

It had been six weeks since you last spoke to Andy.

It was not an easy six weeks, but not for the reasons you had suspected the night you walked out on him. You had thought the worst part would be having to return to financial independence, you thought you would be on your own again. And even though that was the case, it was also technically not the case.

Andy was still putting money into your account. You hadn’t touched a cent of it, and you wouldn’t dream of doing such a thing, but you weren’t going to act as if your good fortune wasn’t there. If there was ever a real emergency, you would be able to fall back on that money and Andy wouldn’t hold it against you. Part of you hated that he wouldn’t be a jerk about it.

The texts had stopped after the second week. First, he pleaded with you to speak to him, to let him explain everything to you. Then he wanted to make sure you were okay, he sent you texts asking for anything. Next, he asked if you thought you could ever forgive him. Finally, he promised to give you time to figure this all out. No time limits, he was willing to talk whenever you were.

You never responded, no matter how much you wanted to. Especially the text inquiring about your forgiveness. You had started with ‘no’, a text you retyped at least a hundred times, then it went to ‘I’m not sure’, to a less strict opinion of ‘I don’t know yet’. You knew you were getting weaker by the day, but thankfully, he wasn’t contacting you anymore.

It really wasn’t that you were just mad. You had felt scared when you got home that night, worrying that you might have just lost something great—you had—but in that fear, that was what created anger. He was fine losing you, clearly. He was fine shaking up your whole life and not even hesitating. That was what you had to hold onto when you really wanted to text him.

Mornings were difficult, but at least school was right there. Friends knew the importance of Andy and understood the aching you felt over his absence. They took up your time when they could. Nights were unbearable, sleeping alone, not getting those AM calls, not seeing him, hearing his voice.

You figured you were restless, so it wasn’t long before you got a job. You wanted to return to the routine of school and work until you were so exhausted that when your head hit the pillow, you were out. And what better way to achieve that than returning to serving at the restaurant? You were surprised they took you back without making you jump through so many hoops.

The seventh week was when things changed. The money didn’t come in, you checked all the time. A pathetic reassurance that he hadn’t given up on you yet. You weren’t sure why you needed it because you knew you couldn’t go back to him, but it still hurt. You had to call in and you could tell your boss was regretting your rehiring, but you couldn’t stop crying. Arguably, the end had come seven weeks ago, but this was pure finality.

Regardless, you had to keep going. After giving yourself four days—something you would always lie about, the fourth day was spent making to-do lists anyway, technically you’d only been pathetic for three days—you were back on your feet.

You had an incentive anyway. It was almost Christmas, so before your affluent classmates were returning home, they wanted to have mini-Christmases. You had officially been roped into seven, and by that last one, you were exhausted. There were common themes: pregnancies, proposals, relocating.

Just the week before final classes and exams, you had witnessed three engagements, four if you counted the rejected one, made yourself a godmother—whatever that meant, you were unsure, but you’d heard about it a lot on TV—to three unborn babies, and accepted two invitations to be in wedding parties.

On what you would call the worst night of your life, you were at the final friend-Christmas. You had seen the light at the end of the tunnel, you thought you were going to be able to unwind and try to get back to who you were before all of this.

This night, you were waiting with around twenty other people to witness proposal number five. Something your friend was in the dark about because she would never suspect her boyfriend could organize something like this.

Despite your shitty situation, you weren’t envious of anyone. Everyone seemed so happy and it wasn’t as if they hadn’t worked for their accomplishments. You were still sad, though. You knew that if things were how you wanted them to be, after all these Christmases, you would have been able to meet up with Andy and he would have asked you what happened during them. You missed talking to him about your life.

Anyway, at least you were able to finally break out your super-fancy dresses again. It reminded you of the good times when you were with Andy. You always liked getting dressed up for him, put together so perfectly just so he could take you apart. You showed up a little down, but certainly not enough to ruin the night.

Well, not until your friend to your right leaned over to you and whispered something you hoped was a figment of your slightly-intoxicated imagination. “Hey, isn’t that the guy you were seeing?”

First, you looked at her, heart pounding. No, no, that wasn’t possible. And you knew it would have to be Andy because the guys you had been “seeing” before were never important enough to let your friends know about. Then, you turned to where she was staring with wide eyes.

Yep, it was him halfway across the restaurant, but you couldn’t look at him. You couldn’t take your eyes off the dark-haired woman across from him. You had never seen her, he didn’t have any pictures anywhere, and he’d obviously never had any desire to have you two meet.

“Oh, my god,” your friend whispered, scandalized, “Who is he with?”

“That’s his wife,” you muttered back. You weren’t sure what you felt yet. Numb, maybe. She looked so much like Jacob, pale, perfect skin, black hair. They had those same slender, sharp features. She had darker eyes, though. Jacob got his from Andy.

“Oh, my god, honey.” She set her hand on your shoulder. “Don’t even worry about this, she’s…not…whatever, but you are so…”

“She’s really, really pretty,” you stated. “That looks exactly like the kind of woman someone like him would be married to.”

“No,” she immediately echoed. “Well, okay, yes, but you are amazing.”

At their table, it was a simple, quiet conversation. There was nothing you could make assumptions about—not that you even had that right. Until Laurie reached across and set her hand over Andy’s.

Your friend gasped again.

You suddenly felt very stupid. You had gone everywhere with Andy, wearing the tiniest, most revealing clothing, and she was so classic and modest. Of course, he was just with you until he could be with her again.

Now the money that didn’t come in made perfect sense. It was ridiculous that you were so upset. This was exactly what you had expected, that was why you left that night. But suspecting that something would happen and seeing it, were two completely different things. You never would have thought they would ever be in the same place as you.

“Oh, my god, he saw us. He’s looking at you right now.”

You instantly turned back to your table, sending a smile to the friends across the table. They were looking at the pair of you, concerned over what you were was a devastated look on your face.

Thankfully, your servers started bringing out the food. At the distraction, you turned to your friend and hissed, “Do not watch them the whole night.”

She shot you a pleading look. Expecting her not to watch this show was just cruel.

“Seriously. I can’t believe they’re here. He has so much fucking money, why the hell would he be at this place?”

She frowned. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine…it was going to happen eventually, right?”

She forced a smile. “And now, you can just leave it in this year. We’ll go out on New Year’s, and we’ll have fun, and we’ll start completely new.”

You nodded. “Sounds good.” But she was engaged, so it wasn’t exactly going to be as carefree as she was claiming. You knew you would end up canceling when it got closer. An entire night of friends trying to push you to date? No.

They couldn’t understand why you were so hung up on Andy. Now, seeing him in person, seeing what he looked like, you hoped they would stop giving you so much flack.

As dinner went on, you didn’t dare a look over at Andy. This was humiliating and you would have already left had it not been for the proposal that was coming soon. Your phone buzzed in your bag, against the leg of the chair, and you shared a look with your friend.

You both had the same thought that it was Andy. You didn’t reach for it, instead, you returned to the current conversation. It wasn’t that easy, however, your friend next to you was texting, and then there were random pings and buzzes all over the table, and now, you assumed, more than half of everyone knew what was going on.

You felt eyes on you from every direction, but you stayed composed, and just waited. You wondered what they thought of you, now that they were all in such committed relationships. You wondered if they thought you deserved this, if you shouldn’t have been in a relationship with Andy. You wondered if any of them would even talk to you after this year, maybe you would be left behind, too.

Everyone was starting their perfect lives by getting married, they were moving in together. They would soon start their families. As far as they knew—since you hadn’t been forthcoming about your relationship with Andy—you were their worst fear. The kind of woman that stopped a husband from being with his wife.

The servers were coming around to get the empty plates from the table. You had lost your appetite, your friend next to you was slyly eating what she could the entire time. But she was only human, a curious human.

“Who is that with them?”

You turned to her with wide eyes. “Stop it.”

“Come on, I just need to know.”

“I can’t look.”

“He’s young.”

“That’s probably his son.”

“Maybe it’s just a family dinner, you know. Maybe—”

“I don’t want to think about it,” you interjected. “I can’t.”

“Okay, sorry.”

It was another half hour, and three drinks later, that it finally happened. The boyfriend stood up, a lot paler than he usually was, and everyone whipped out their phones. You, on the other hand, couldn’t. You would read your message if it was from him, and you would want to look at him. And you weren’t sure what would happen after that, but you suspected it wasn’t good.

As soon as he got down on one knee, his girlfriend was already crying. You weren’t sure if you had just seen it too many times or now you were bitter, but it honestly did nothing for you. Everyone else was ecstatic, clapping, and present in the moment. They weren’t trying not to cry because their ex-sugar daddy was at dinner with his wife and son, playing the perfect little family.

After she said yes and the surrounding restaurant started to clap, you were already rehearsing your exit. Thankfully, your friend next to you knew that you needed to get out of there. You suspected she wanted to get back to her boyfriend, anyway—he was sick and couldn’t make it.

She told you she was getting the Uber and she would take you home. It wasn’t like you could drive anyway; you had had too much alcohol. It wasn’t always your intent, it was a week that you were supposed to be focused on school, but why not dwell on your terrible decisions?

The text from Andy claimed, this isn’t what it looks like.

Why did it even matter? Had he not given up on you? Had he not decided that this wasn’t going to work anymore? The money he didn’t send you was what you were going off, and it was a fairly solid point of argument. Six weeks and then it changed?

You were sure you knew why, so it was definitely what it looked like. You chose not to respond to the text, any of the four. He was back to texting and asking if you would talk. He was pacing himself this time, only one a day. But it was just enough to keep you completely obsessed with him for those first four days. You wanted to text back and see what kind of lie he would tell you. You wanted to argue, maybe.

Work was the only distraction you had, until you headed out to your next table and found Jacob sitting there. With a sigh and a menu in hand, you made your way to him. You handed it off and asked, “What are you doing here, Jacob?”

“Well, you didn’t say hi the other night.”

“I was trying to get out as quickly as possible. If I hadn’t had to sit there and watch a stupid proposal, I would have left the second I saw your parents.”

“It wasn’t like they were on a date.”

“Jacob, I’m working.”

“Yeah, I’m taking advantage of the fact that you can’t ignore me. I just wanted to come here and tell you that we were just there for me. We were celebrating, okay?”

“Celebrating what?” you wondered. “Your parents are getting remarried? Do they already have the date set? You think I’ll get an invitation?”

He sighed. “No, early acceptance.”

“Jacob, that’s great.” Mad or not, it was good news. Which only made you angry again. You’d known Jacob was waiting on his letter, only because he had told you. Even before he’d let Andy know and had sworn you to secrecy. You blamed him, he should have set more boundaries if he didn’t want to keep you in his life long-term. He should have never encouraged you to start talking to Jacob. But he did and you missed that news.

“Yeah, wanna take Chem 101 together?”

And you were back to anger. “Jacob, order. I have other tables.”

He glanced around. “I’m not only the only one in your section, but I’m the only customer in here.”

“I have to get out of here soon, so please order. Your mission is complete, okay? You told me the truth, and now everything is fixed.”

“Look, my dad would never say this, but he’s not doing too well.”

Your eyebrows pulled together. “What do you mean? Is he okay?”

“No, not really. He’s been down ever since you left, and he keeps trying to distract himself with work, but I can see it. Everyone can see it. Please, just talk to him once. Just give him another chance to make things right.”

You sighed. “If I say I will talk to him, once, will you please leave so I can go home?”

He smiled. “Yes, but you have to promise. And if you don’t, I will come here every night and keep you super late.”

“Okay, Jacob, I promise.”

And you intended to keep your promise, but things changed. Due to Jacob’s news, which ignited some anger you were still holding onto, you wanted revenge. It wasn’t like now that you weren’t seeing Andy, his “friends” weren’t still trying to get you to switch over to them.

One had come into the restaurant a few days prior and told you about a party they were having this weekend. He made it more than clear that he wanted you to go with him. You’d said no, but he left his number. You kept it, just in case. And thank goodness you did, because you now officially had a use for it.

You didn’t wear pink. One day, you hoped you would be able to, but now it just reminded you of Andy and how eventually, your anger was going to burn out and you were going to be left with that sadness and that aching feeling in your chest because you couldn’t be with him.

So, you settled on black. It was revealing, but it was clearly a much different vibe. You’d always trusted Andy, you had practically given yourself over to him completely. That was not the case here and you wanted to convey that, the dress was low-cut and short, but it was loose and hardly showed off anything that would have made Andy “scold” you about for “tempting” him.

On the drive there, you were handed a diamond choker. You didn’t take it, you claimed that it was too much too fast. Your date was understanding, especially when you told him that if still felt the same about you on the next date, then you would accept it. In reality, you just didn’t want jewelry from anyone else. You weren’t sure you ever would, but no one needed to know that.

It was humiliating being with the same crowd that you were sure had all but forgotten about you. Now, there you were again, but not with Andy. They’d always looked at you with a harsh opinion, it was multiplied by about a billion now. Francesca looked smug, thrilled. You were sure if he did show up, she would attach herself to him like a leech. You didn’t much mind all this judgment, they’d shift their attention soon enough.

40 minutes late, Andy showed up.

It had been a long shot when you agreed to this. You weren’t sure he was even coming to these parties anymore, he’d hated them enough when you were with him. If he was solo, you couldn’t think of a single reason he would keep up the act. Yet, there he was.

Just as you had suspected, Francesca made her way to him immediately.

Your date placed his hand over yours.

“This won’t be a problem, right?”

“Not at all. I just want to see his face when he sees us together.”

If he wanted to argue, he thought better of it. You kept your gaze on the pair as Andy awkwardly tried to disengage from their conversation. When he finally saw you, it was everything you wanted. He looked like he had seen a ghost.

Smirking, you turned back to the man sitting across from you. It was a freezing night, and you were trying to warm yourself up with champagne. You had no idea what the party was for, some type of celebration, but it wasn’t as if it mattered to you. Mission accomplished; you could have left if you wanted. But hell, you wanted to rub some salt in his wounds.

You had been a silent robot prior to his arrival, but now you were the perfect date. It was never fake with Andy, but you could use it as inspiration for this. You laughed and smiled and hung onto every word. You pretended that you weren’t with some man you had absolutely no interest in.

You were reaching the end of your ability to act and had the bright idea to recharge in the bathroom. You would fix up your makeup, give yourself a pep talk, text a few of your friends, and you would be fine again.

Well, you would have been, had Andy not barged in. “What are you doing here?”

You were in the middle of touching up your lips by that point. “What the hell?” You slammed the cap back on your lipstick and shoved it back into your clutch. “This is a bathroom, get out.”

“Get out?” he repeated. “As if this entire display wasn’t just to get my attention?”

Thankfully, him standing just inches in front of you did not destroy your desire to fight. But you did realize how badly you missed the small things. His height compared to yours, the way he stood when he was close to you, protective, strong. He seemed invincible to you, but clearly, you had a bad habit of hyping him up too high. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have spent so many nights crying over losing a sugar daddy. “Attention? No, I need money.”

“You’re working at the restaurant again, so that’s a lie. The first, which I’ll be keeping track of.”

You narrowed your eyes. Keeping track? For what? You couldn’t ask, however, because then you would be trapped right where he wanted you to be. “Did you send Jacob there to spy on me?”

“Jacob?” He narrowed his eyes. “He went to see you?”

If Andy hadn’t sent him there, that meant he was there just to try to get you back with his father. “As you know, I’ve acquired expensive taste. A paycheck from a stupid restaurant isn’t going to cut it and since you stopped sending money…”

He arched an eyebrow.

You shrugged. “You probably can’t be doing that anymore if you’re trying to get your wife back, right?”

“Look, I’m sorry if seeing us together hurt you—”

“No, what hurt me is when you said you would follow her just about anywhere on this fucking planet.”

“That is not what happened.”

“Oregon, Andy. Is there any place worse?”

“I sent you money,” he claimed.

You rolled your eyes. “No, you didn’t. And you shouldn’t because I quit. I am no longer employed by you, therefore, you shouldn’t give me anything ever again. But that also means I needed to find a new employer.”

“And that’s Dan Rifkin? You’re seriously here with Dan Rifkin?”

“Dan, right.” You shrugged. “I’d completely forgotten what his name was. I usually just call him d—”

His hand was over your mouth before you could finish speaking, his other hand grabbing your hip to spin you around. His chest was pressed to your back, his arm draped across your stomach, and his hand slid down to your neck. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?” you asked, forcing your voice to sound calm even though you were anything but. You’d only ever made Andy angry one other time and he fucked you. Did he honestly think he could do anything about it this time?

“If you ever call anyone else…that—”

“Too late.” Obviously, Dan Rifkin was not a daddy, but Andy didn’t know that.

He took several seconds to respond, willing himself to calm down before this got any more out of control. “Well, princess, I know how well behaved you are for your daddy. And if you really thought of him that way, you wouldn’t be here with me—”

“I’m being held here against my will. This is kidnapping, I’m pretty sure. I’m not here with you because I want to be.”

“So, what? You wanna call the fucking police?” He brought his other hand up to your face, softly touching your cheek, then your lips.

You rolled your eyes. “Andy, get off me.”

“I’m also keeping track of that, by the way, of how many times you call me anything other than daddy.”

“And?”

“You know what I do to you when you forget your manners.”

You tried to wriggle away from him, but he only tightened his hold.

“I bend you over my knee and spank you until you’re crying, begging me to fill that desperate pussy.”

You glared at him in the mirror. “What is this, exactly? Did your wife tell you she doesn’t want to get back together, so you decided to try your usual backup plan?”

“You have never been my backup plan.”

You snorted. “Yeah, right.”

“Don’t use that tone with me.”

“Or what?” you demanded.

“Enough,” he warned. “Stop acting like such a spoiled brat. I am sorry that I upset you, but if you had talked to me instead of jumping to these ridiculous conclusions—”

“I made educated guesses after you told your wife that you—”

“I told my son,” he corrected. “This had nothing to do with Laurie.”

“Your whole life is about her!”

You saw him turn red, his jaw clenched, and his hand tightened just a little. “I was going to ask you if you wanted to come with me,” he snapped.

You were immediately silent, staring at him with wide eyes. Surely, you hadn’t heard him correctly. Because that would mean Jacob wasn’t wrong when he’d told you that Andy was going to ask you to move in. If he was going to ask you to move to Oregon, then he would have no problem asking you to live with him anywhere else.

He huffed when he realized you weren’t going to respond. “I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you would think we were moving too fast.”

He was right, that was if you believed him. Which, to be clear, you didn’t. He was just trying to get control back of this situation because he had to control everything. “You need to let me go.”

“Wait—”

“Let me go, Andy. I’m here on a date with someone else.”

“You’re still mine,” he insisted. “And you’re always going to be mine.”

“Andy!” you reprimanded, exasperated. What did he want with you? Why couldn’t he go find someone else? Someone who wasn’t a “spoiled brat”?

Instead of verbally responding, he touched you with his free hand again, your jaw. You averted your gaze to the countertop. He just wanted to make you watch and you weren’t going to. He let his hand trail down to your breast, pinching your nipple over the material.

You stayed completely still, mouth clamped shut, eyes focused down, body tensed. You felt his hand slipping down and your breath caught noticeably when he was just below your navel.

“Just one more time, baby girl. Tell me to let go, tell me to stop and I will.”

When you opened your mouth, you intended to say just that. But that was not what came out. “Now that Jacob is going to college here, is your wife moving in with you or are you all just going to get another house together?”

He yanked your dress up, scoffing when he saw your panties. “As if I needed more proof that you never intended to fuck him. You came here so I would see you with Dan, and then what? What was your brilliant plan? What did you think my response was going to be if not exactly what I’m doing right now?”

You simply shrugged. “Honestly, I thought you would have your wife with you.”

“You are so infuriating,” he growled. He yanked your panties down of the right side until they were halfway down your thigh and your cunt was exposed to him.

You held your breath, watching his hand moving in the mirror. So, your prior plan was clearly not of any interest to you anymore. He was slow about it and not because he thought you were going to protest, he just wanted to make sure you want it. Bad.

Finally, he touched you and you both shuddered. You couldn’t pretend that you didn’t know it was only him that could make you feel this way. It didn’t matter that it was just barely a brush of his fingers, it was him that you wanted touching you.

He closed his eyes, pressing his forehead to the side of your face. His hand around your neck tightened so slightly, and you felt him hard against your hip. “I miss you.”

You felt your face get hot, and you knew if he saw you that he was going to realize how close you were to crumbling. “Did you mean to say that to me or were you thinking of your wife?”

“Shut. Up.” He moved both hands to your hips to spin you back around. He picked you up and sat you down on the counter. “Stop talking, you’re driving me fucking crazy.” He moved closer, setting himself between your legs so you couldn’t close them, as he tore your lacy panties to pieces to get them out of his way.

You weren’t sure what came over you when you started pulling his pants down out of your way. This was happening, not even a fire could have pulled you two apart at that moment.

As soon as your hand was wrapped around him, he yanked your hips to the edge of the counter. Staring down, he pushed into you slowly. Your hands immediately set to the counter for balance, your head falling back as you let out this quiet, drawn-out cry. He had missed the sight of this more than he could explain. He missed you, of course, but he missed being connected to you, touching you, hearing you scream for him.

Your head was spinning by the time his body was flush against yours, his cock buried inside you as deeply as it could get. You threw your arms around him, desperately clinging to him as your hips squirmed. Of course, you had missed this, missed being so full and fucked so good. You fucking missed Andy.

He pushed you back, hand on your neck, until you were leaned against the mirror. You didn’t want to look at his face, so instead, you watched his cock disappearing inside you again and again.

He knew he wouldn’t last long, he had been craving you unbearably for longer than he could remember. It hadn’t always been that way, it started with just missing your presence. Lately, however, he’d been waking up so desperate to be inside you. He hadn’t been sure he was ever going to get to feel you again, that you gave into him here told him that you had been missing him in the same way.

One of his hands came up, fingers pressing down on your clit.

“Andy,” you gasped, your eyes snapping up to his. You weren’t expecting it, it was too much. You didn’t want to feel this way about him, you didn’t want to be here with him—this was going to derail any progress that you had made. But you so badly needed more, and you hated how weak you were for it.

“Ask me to make you come,” he ordered. Your pussy was getting tighter and tighter, holding him in that way he loved. He should probably be embarrassed that you could make him finish in minutes, but the bliss of your cunt was enough to silence any insecurities he had.

“Make me come, please make me come,” you blurted out, the desire for dignity long gone now. “Please, please,” you continued to chant, voice breaking, tone whiny, until he did just that.

You fell apart around him, and he only needed a few more thrusts before he was spilling into you. He pulled you closer, arms wrapping around your shoulders, and he held you as he used you to ride out his high. His hips moved until you relaxed against his chest, but he didn’t let you go.

You were shaky, your mind was fuzzy. You were always like that after, and you needed Andy to hold you until everything made sense again, but you couldn’t let it happen. Every second you stayed in his presence would just make it harder to leave.

You pushed at his chest until he leaned back. He saw the look on your face and knew you were making your escape. He pulled out and tucked himself back in his pants. You knew by the time you made it home, his cum would be all over your thighs.

He kept trying to meet your eye, but you refused. “Hey, can we—?”

“I have to go,” you interjected. You hopped off the counter, yanking the hem of your dress back down into place. Yes, you would admit that you wanted to upset Andy, but this was not supposed to happen. This was why you couldn’t talk to him or text him, he still had you so weak and willing to bend to whatever he said.

This was all your fault.

Many things were your fault. When he claimed to have sent the money, it made you want to scream. He was the one who wanted to have a conversation, so why was he lying? Well, as it turned out, he was not. The next morning, when you remembered what he had said, you went to check the account. So, it was sent…and it just happened to get there a day late.

You were willing to admit that it was an overreaction on your part. Sometimes, the money did come late. That was just the way banks worked. It was you who had jumped to conclusions and made decisions before you had all the information.

So, okay, that point went to him.

But that was the only point that he got. You were still mad at him, it was just that that anger had shifted. Seriously, he was going to ask you to go with him? Again, you didn’t believe him. But for the sake of argument, if you did—reminder: you did not—it was offensive that he thought you would ever want to live in Oregon. How could he even think that was a solution?

And you were still scared. You weren’t supposed to like Andy this much, it wasn’t going to work out. This was not a fairytale. You weren’t going to marry your sugar daddy and live happily ever after. You knew he didn’t see you as a permanent relationship, and at the start, you were okay with that. But after everything, after getting to know him and being part of his life, you weren’t okay with that.

His persistence in getting you back, you told yourself, was because he just wanted to get his control back. It was something you noticed immediately about Andy. He had a thing for control. It was never a problem because you were fine letting him take the lead, but you had to do what was best for you. Andy wasn’t what was best for you.

This was the talk you had with yourself after every text he sent you. Which, also your fault, was occurring every morning and night. Just one text each time, each one offering a point of argument because he knew how much you liked to argue. So badly, your hands itched to reply!

But you couldn’t. As soon as you gave in again, it would be much easier just to fall back into things. You didn’t want to go back. You remembered how terrible he made you feel when he wouldn’t tell you about the conversation, how small he had made you feel because he was pushing you away. And you remembered that heart-dropping, stomach-twisting in response to him telling you he had offered to leave Massachusetts. Andy was a family man and you were not his family, you were not his wife or even his girlfriend, you were never going to be the mother of his child.

Simple as that.

Life went on. School. Work. Trying to take care of yourself. And repeat. No communication with Andy. Thankfully, Jacob had not shown up again. It was a minor snag in your plans to move on, but it wouldn’t happen again. Three weeks later and things were honestly perfect.

But three weeks and one day later, that took a turn. You returned home early from school. There was a mishap with a friend and coffee. You just needed to change and then you would be on your way back.

When you approached your door, it was opened. You used your foot to nudge it forward, discovering that it had been broken open. Someone had broken your door. For a split second, you wanted to run to the main office, they would know what to do.

But you had the sinking feeling that if this was a break-in, for the purpose of a robbery, that you knew what was missing. You stepped into your apartment and it just felt like someone had been there. Everything looked the same, all your mess, all your belongings, none of it had been touched but there was an energy.

You went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and then stormed to your room. You briefly peeked into doorways on your way, but your biggest concern was what was in your closet. As soon as you walked in and saw the light on, you were sure you were going to have a panic attack.

“No, no, no,” you muttered to yourself over and over as you rushed inside. There, in the very middle of your walk-in closet was your opened jewelry box. Every diamond ever gifted to you from Andy was missing. The bracelets, the necklaces.

Your rings.

You didn’t remember leaving your apartment. The first time you became aware of what was happening was when you saw your terrifying reflection in the windows of the main office. Your face was stained with mascara tears, you were hyperventilating, barely making any sense as everyone tried to calm you down.

The police showed up by the time someone had finally convinced you to sit. You needed to, you felt like you were going to faint at any second. And you felt so stupid about that! Everyone was running around, making sure that no one else’s apartment had been broken into and that no one was hurt. You felt like this spoiled brat, sobbing over diamond rings. But those rings were abnormally important to you. You wouldn’t part with them if your life depended on it.

There were memories that were attached to them, some of your favorite memories not only with Andy, but in your entire life. The way you felt in the jewelry shop that first time, nervous as fuck, until he wrapped his arms around you and kissed your face until you calmed down. He had called you a good girl for the first time, and at the time you were mortified at the thought that someone had heard, but now you couldn’t help but smile when you thought about it.

Or when you were so angry with him because Jacob had seen you half-naked standing in their kitchen. You threatened to never have sex with him again, all he did was get on his knees and kiss your stomach until you begged him to move lower. The morning after, you went back to the jewelry shop and he fucked you in the car before you went inside. It was the sweetest you had ever seen him.

Or the dinner that celebrated 100 days together. That was the first night Andy scared you, when you realized how fucking intense he could be, how emotional. You’d never had butterflies before that night, and that was a feeling you cherished.

Or the stupid car accident. He was protective and caring, and you had never felt safer in your entire existence. And that was why you were crying. It wasn’t just the fucking rings and the materialistic aspect, it was everything the rings symbolized.

They were the last reminders of the relationship. The reminders you only wore at home, in your closet, while drinking and crying, because you missed Andy so fucking much. The reminders that he had had real feelings for you and cared about you and wanted everyone to know that you were his.

You were convinced that you were hallucinating when the door to the office opened and in walked Andy. But then the officer next to you greeted him. That was the absolute last thing you needed right now. He could offer you nothing, no support, no comfort. There was nothing Andy could do for you and you were immediately furious that he was even there.

He crouched down in front of you, one hand on your knee and the other on your cheek. “Hey, are you okay?”

“What are you doing here?”

He gave you a look. He wouldn’t scold you in front of everyone, but you shouldn’t try him like that.

“I’m fine. How did you know?” Did the officers call him? That would be humiliating beyond comprehension. You also never said they could do that. It was inappropriate. How did they even know who you were? Did every cop know Andy? Did everyone who worked with him know who you were?

“Mr. Barber,” the officer nodded to the side. Andy followed him, making sure to create enough distance that you couldn’t hear what was being said. As if you didn’t already feel like a child.

Someone called him and had to get him down here because you were a complete mess. Maybe moving out of this state wasn’t such a bad idea. You’d never considered just how well-known Andy was.

The second officer asked you more questions in their absence. The expected questions. Was there anyone you suspected? Did you have any enemies? Have you noticed anything weird happening around the apartments lately?

It was a few minutes later when the men returned. The officer explained that your office had already organized everything. The repair would happen soon, but you did need to stay somewhere else. Andy assured them that you had a place to stay.

Absolutely not. But that also meant you didn’t really have anywhere to go. Your friends would be panicked to hear any of this, and you had no desire to cause anyone such stress. Maybe a hotel was a good idea.

They left the two of you alone. Andy got back down in front of you, sighing when he saw your uncompromising expression. “The office called me.”

You narrowed your eyes.

“You know I don’t like your neighbors. It didn’t take two weeks after I was first here that I started paying them to keep me informed. I always knew if something like this happened that you wouldn’t call. Are you okay?”

You shook your head.

“Well, it was probably just the jewelry—”

Just the jewelry? And why was he acting like he knew more about this situation than you? You knew that nothing more had been taken, but that wasn’t relieving to you. “I know.”

He hesitated for a moment after hearing the sharpness in your tone. “I’m just saying that it’s all right. Everything was insured—”

“Insured?”

“Yeah, we can get all the pieces replaced, replicated—”

“God, Andy.” You got out of the chair and stormed out, ignoring the curious looks from the office staff.

He was quick to follow, sounding terribly exasperated. “Please explain to me how you could possibly be mad about this.”

It was a particularly freezing February, something that hadn’t mattered when you were frantically making your way down here. As you were now left with nothing to do but confront the last person you wanted to confront, it was a lot more notable.

You turned back to him. “Why are you even still here?”

“You’re coming with me,” he declared.

“I am certainly not.”

“You are, even if I have to drag you to my car. Answer the question. What the hell are you mad about now?”

“If you don’t already know—”

“Explain it to me!”

“I don’t want replacements!” you snapped. “Of course, you would have no problem with replacements, you have no sentimental attachment to anything.”

“Then what do you want?”

“I want my jewelry! I want my rings! Everything you gave me was special to me. Those rings were memories. Does it not bother you that they were just stolen?”

He sighed as he stepped closer to you. You tried to turn your head to keep that distance, but he wrapped his arms around you and well, it all just sort of happened. You hugged him back, hiding your face in his shirt as you felt your eyes filling with tears once again.

It had been a long time since you broke down and you’d never done so with Andy. Not only was it weird because you didn’t like him seeing you like this, but it was added to the grief you felt over losing your jewelry and this aching you had felt ever since the day you left him. It felt like you were never going to stop crying.

He kept his hand cradled on the back of your head, his opposite hand running up and down your back. He stood there with all the patience in the world, letting you cry. There were a few shushing sounds, several kisses to the top of your head, but he never tried to steer the situation.

He knew when he could speak, when you had settled enough. He figured you had exhausted yourself, meaning you would be putting up much less of a fight. “I’m upset about the rings…but it happens. What bothers me is that you’re still living here.”

You sighed. The moment was over then. Pulling away from him, you let him know where your thoughts were. “I should stay at a hotel—”

“Are you out of your mind?”

“I’m not going with you. This doesn’t change anything.”

“No, it changes everything. I can’t believe I even let you stay here.”

“Let me?” you scoffed.

“I’m pretty sure this is a drug hot spot, you know.”

“Andy.” You rolled your eyes. “Stop being dramatic.”

“No dramatics, no threats, no bargaining. Just the truth: you’re coming with me.”

You lifted your eyebrows. “So, you’re going to kidnap me? Again?”

He shrugged, smiling crookedly at you. “Call the cops.”

You shook your head, sighing. This was quickly spiraling out of your control. You knew where you would feel the safest, with him in his bedroom, wrapped in a million blankets. But that didn’t erase everything else. Instead of open and honest communication, you thought grasping at straws was for the best. “This is awfully convenient for you.”

“Excuse me?”

You shrugged. “Just an observation.”

“Well, let me argue that point. This is convenient for you. I was about to start showing up at the restaurant and your school.”

“For what?”

“Whatever I wanted.”

You narrowed your eyes. But it wasn’t like you hadn’t been thinking about what happened the last time you saw him. And now, imagining him showing up on campus, just to fuck you, that was something else.

“I know that Jacob told you…about how he thought I was going to ask you to move in.”

You crossed your arms. “That wasn’t going to happen.”

“I already have a room for you. It’s closer to the campus, you could walk if you ever needed to, not that I would let you, but if there was an emergency or something—”

“Andy,” you sighed. “Don’t do this. It was never supposed to be like, our relationship. Okay? You don’t have to do this. With me. You could do anything, you could find someone else—”

“What is the problem? Why are you trying to push me away?”

“I’m scared of you.”

“Scared?” he repeated, appalled.

“Do you know how sugar daddies are supposed to act?”

He thought about that. “No. Not really.”

“I know how I’m supposed to act. I’m not supposed to care about what’s going on in your life. I’m not supposed to be waiting for you to call me at 2 am because I want to hear your voice. I’m not supposed to care about your stupid cases and not distracting you. It’s a transaction, okay? We fuck, you pay me. None of this was supposed to happen.”

“Well, it did.”

“I know…but it’s not enough.”

“What else do you need from me? I want you. I haven’t dated anyone else—”

“Except Laurie.”

He sighed. “She’s the mother of my child. That was not a date, I was just there with her because that was what Jacob wanted.”

“Think about that, Andy. What are we? When Jacob…graduates high school, college, when he finally proposes to Sarah—because he’s obsessed with her—and everyone is together, celebrating. Picture that. Them, Laurie, you…and me?”

“Why not? I’m not ashamed of you or this relationship.”

“Maybe you should be.”

“The only thing I’m ashamed of is that I haven’t taught you better manners. You are being such a brat right now.”

You glared.

“Look, baby, we all know that eventually, you’re going to say yes to me. I’ll forgive the attitude at the party, the attitude here because you are under a lot of stress. If you keep it up, however, I’m going to have to bend you over my knee—”

You closed your eyes and sighed. “Andy—”

“Be a good girl for once and get in the god damn my car, Y/N.”

Your eyes opened only so you could make a disapproving face at him. He rarely ever called you by your name, you wondered if that was why he was so bothered at the party after you not only used his name but referenced the concept that you were calling someone else what you should be calling him. “That’s it? If I get in the car, you think everything is resolved?”

“Not at all. I just want to get you inside and take care of you. You look like you haven’t eaten all day.”

You hadn’t but how would he know that? You rolled your eyes and turned your head down. You chose to stare at your shoes, his shoes, the lines of the sidewalk.

“And you look tired.”

“I am,” you muttered. “Tired of your shit.”

He smirked, and only did so because you couldn’t see. “Just let me take you home.”

“My home is this stupid apartment.”

“For now. I intend to change that.”

You looked up at him, an exasperated look on your face. “You’re not listening to me.”

“I am listening. I just don’t think we can’t fix all of this. I think that if we talk about everything, everything will be okay again. That’s all I’ve wanted since that night.”

You rolled your eyes again. “I’m only going to talk. I am not staying with you tonight. And if I tell you to drive me somewhere, after we talk, you are going to. You are not allowed to detain me in your home like you detained me in that bathroom. Do you understand me?”

He nodded. “Okay.”

You sighed. “Fine, let’s go.”

The drive was quiet enough and not in any sort of strained way. You remembered how much you liked drives with Andy, his hand always on your thigh. Well, that was always where it started anyway.

He noticed you looking at his hand, but he didn’t want to test you too much too soon. He just turned his hand over and placed it next to your leg on the seat. You pathetically gave in and set your hand over his.

“Is Jacob here?” You asked as he pulled into the driveway, noticing the white car that you had never seen parked out front.

“That’s Sarah’s. They went to some party and got a ride over there.”

You could have left it there, you didn’t need to tease him. “That means they’re drinking.”

“Don’t joke with me about that.”

You shrugged. “Just saying.”

“I told them to call me if that’s the case.”

“Well, let’s hope that happens soon.”

He scoffed. “You’re not that lucky.”

You both got out of the car and moved into the house. It seemed so cold since you were last there. Nothing had changed exactly, but it felt like it had. Honestly, everything was exactly where it had been, but it didn’t feel like a place you were familiar with anymore.

“I’ll cook something,” he offered. “Or we can order.”

“Can I help?”

He looked surprised by that. You weren’t much of a cook to begin with and since you’d met him, the occasion for it became much less frequent. It wasn’t a skill that he thought you needed to possess because he could cook, or he had the money to get someone else to cook for you. But he wasn’t going to say no to you now, not when he felt like your calmness was so conditional.

“Yeah, what should we make?”

You shrugged. “I’m okay with anything.”

It was mostly silent while the two of you moved around the kitchen. Chicken Parmesan pasta because he was trying to get on your good side and pasta was the best way to do that. You worked on the pasta and he worked on the rest—because, really, he was the much stronger cook in this duo.

When you were sitting at the table, across from one another, it seemed less tense. He could tell you weren’t all that angry anymore and you could tell that he was finally willing to listen to you. He held his hand out curiously and you gave him yours. He simply kissed your palm and then let you go.

You rolled your eyes. “You’re a danger to society. I should call the police. I should have you arrested.”

He smiled a little. “Your issue is, and add on if I’m missing something, that we have broken tradition of what these arrangements are supposed to look like. You think you have no real place in my life. You think I went on a date with my ex-wife, who you still refer to as my wife…”

You shrugged. “Only to bother you.”

He arched an eyebrow at you. “Great, thought I was going to have to pull out the paperwork for you. Am I missing anything?”

You shook your head.

“Would you like to say something before I start?”

“You canceled on me that day you spoke with Laurie. Why?”

“Because I was upset. I didn’t want you to see me that way.”

“But I want to be there for you.”

“I know…and I know I need to get better about that. This is not behavior that is solely for you. I wasn’t trying to push you away specifically; I just don’t know how I can take care of you if I’m such a mess.”

“Why can’t I take care of you?”

He considered his answer for a moment. He didn’t have a diplomatic answer. He had his answer and that was that he was in charge, he was the caretaker, and he wanted to spoil the hell out of you, never add to your stress, and destroy anything that upset you. But he also knew that wasn’t what you wanted to hear. “Well, I guess there are no rules against that.”

“You’re promising me that you’ll work on it? If I say yes to trying again, which I haven’t decided to do yet.”

“To an extent, yes. I will work on it,” he assured. “What else?”

“You promise you’ll talk to me about work as much as you can?”

“Yes.”

“And never again will you throw some materialistic items at me because we’re distant. I know it wasn’t your intention, but after not seeing you for so long and then getting a fucking handbag to make it better, it made me feel…I don’t know. Small. Unimportant.”

He took your hand again, kissing several times all around your palm. “I’m sorry that I made you feel that way. Because you are very important to me and I apologize if I hadn’t made that clear.”

“You did, but you can’t always buy me off. Not if I haven’t seen you in days.”

“Okay. Keep going.”

“I will not text you if you don’t text me. I’m not going to check in every morning and night if you’re not responding.”

“That’s fair. But you can never ignore my calls again.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“Texts, you can ignore. When I call you, if the hour is reasonable, I need you to answer. Even if you ignore the call and text me. But I’m going to worry if it’s three in the morning and you haven’t let me know where you are.”

“Okay…fine.” It was a compromise. You were willing to be a little less spontaneous and distant if he was willing to be more communicative.

“And?”

“Were you honestly going to ask me to come with you to Oregon?”

He waited for a moment before standing and holding his hand out to you again. “Come on, I want to show you something.”

Against your better judgment, you let him lead you out of the kitchen and down the hall, beyond the bathroom, his bedroom, and the linen closet. He opened the last door, pulling you in front of him.

The room was empty, but the walls were a soft pink color. Everything else in the whole house was white, meaning this was his doing. “I want you to move in. I’ve wanted you to since before Halloween when Jake told you. But that’s not me trying to take away your freedom, this would be your room. You can join me whenever you like, but this is for you. If you slept in here every night, that would be okay with me. I just want you close and safe—and do you know how terrified I was when I got the call from the office? I can’t have that happen again.”

Well, you were officially fucked. Because now you could see it. You could see living here with Andy. You could see giving in again and starting over. You could see mornings and nights together, getting ready for work together and probably fucking in the shower. And speaking of fucking, you could see him fucking you all over this house on just about every solid surface.

You turned up to him, scoffing. “Every night? Really?”

“Yes. Anything you want.”

“Anything?” you pressed. He was trying too hard to make you happy. Was he not aware of the ammunition he was handing to you? You would ask for many things if he let you.

“My point is, yes. I was going to ask you to come with me.”

“And did you think I would say yes? It’s Oregon, Andy.”

“I don’t know. I didn’t stop to think, I just knew I would do whatever I needed to do to get you to say yes.” He turned you to him, arms circling around your waist. “Are you? Saying yes?”

“If I did? What then?”

He shrugged. “We could go shopping.”

You snorted. “That’s not what I was referring to.”

“You want to know what it would look like, right? Us, living together. You want to know how that would work.”

“I guess, yeah.”

“Well, I could tell you…but I could probably show you much better.”

You lifted your eyebrows.

“Take off your clothes and lie down.”

You arched an eyebrow, glancing around the room briefly. “On the floor?”

“Yes.”

You moved further, stopping in the center. You removed your shirt first, then your pants. You turned your back to him as you slid off your panties but faced him when you removed your bra.

He shut the door as soon as you lowered yourself onto the floor. He walked to you, dropping to his knees and lifting your hips to drape over his lap. He had you propped up, legs spread so he could see your cunt, glistening, clenching around nothing in desperation.

He unbuckled his belt first, then opened his pants. You felt hot everywhere as soon as he pulled his hard cock out. You pushed your hips closer until he set his hand down on your stomach. “Behave.” Once you had settled again, he yanked his belt free from his pants.

Shit.

“You gonna be patient for me?”

You scoffed. “I can’t promise that.”

He folded the belt in half, bringing the curve of it to your pussy. You gasped as soon as he pressed it to your skin. “But you’re gonna try, aren’t you?”

You nodded quickly. “Yes.”

He spanked your pussy just slightly with the belt, your hips bucked up. It didn’t hurt at all, but you suddenly wanted it to, you wanted him to hurt you with that fucking belt. You had seen it on him so many times but never thought a thing about it. Now, you couldn’t think about anything else.

He did it again, a bit harder.

Again, your body tensed in response. “Please,” you gasped.

He arched an eyebrow at you. “Please?”

You smirked. “Do you think you’ve earned that much forgiveness?”

He weighed his options carefully. He knew you could and definitely would say no to him if he pushed you too far. But your entire relationship centered on him pushing you just enough. A weak response was not an option. You liked that he met your attitude with his own, you liked that he didn’t cower from you, and he knew that.

“You can hold onto your dignity and call me daddy willingly, or I can make you. Might have to bruise that gorgeous ass.” The challenge on your face was clear, but he wasn’t backing down. He set his hand to your thigh, moving up and to the side off to your hip. You shivered as he curled around and grabbed your ass. “You won’t be able to sit for weeks, baby.”

You smiled, sincerely enough that it put him at ease. You hadn’t said it yet, but you both knew that you had completely given into him. “Please, daddy, harder.”

He picked up one of your hands and kissed your palm. “You still are such a good girl.”

You shrugged. “I can be. If you give me reason to.”

And that was when he hit you harder, just enough that there was a sting a few moments after. You were shaking a little, nervous because it had been so long, but eager because you had missed this.

He rubbed the belt against you, pressing down against your clit light enough that it wouldn’t make you finish, but enough that it still felt too good. You set your hands on his thighs, to the side of your hips on either side, nails digging into his pants and skin.

Without warning, he picked up the belt and yanked it back down against your skin. The wet sound that echoed made you feel like your entire body was on fire. There was no denying this, no one could get you as wet as Andy, no one could make you want to be touched by a belt. You were distantly aware of how desperately you were behaving, but if he kept looking at you like he was—in awe, obsessed—you would continue.

He used the belt again, rubbing circles into your center, giving you no time to recover from the hit. He did this several more times, focusing on your clit and taking you to the edge before stopping, hitting you harder each time. He didn’t stop until your back arched, you were too close, and he wasn’t going to let you finish without being wrapped around him.

This time, when he pulled the belt away, he folded himself over you. You whimpered as his cock brushed through your folds, he grabbed your jaw with one hand, squeezing gently. “Open.”

You did so instantly, and he shoved the belt into your open mouth.

“You taste your pussy?” he asked. You hummed and that was enough for him. He leaned back, letting the belt remain. His hands began sliding all over your body. He paid attention to your neck first, curling his fingers only a little, enough to tease, enough to make you want him to choke you. Then he moved down to your breasts and tortured your nipples until you were whining and squirming.

His hands traveled down, curving around your hips until he could bring them around to your thighs. He pulled you up a little more, angling you to get a better look at your cunt. “Been a long time, princess.” His eyes flickered up to you and he pulled the belt out of your mouth. “Think your pussy can take me?”

“I’m not sure,” you claimed. “You’re just so big.”

“I should probably stretch you out a little, hmm?”

You nodded. “Yes, daddy.”

You watched both of his hands sliding toward your center. You bit your lip, trying to silence your shaky breaths. His calloused fingers against your skin always made you shiver. You loved everything about his hands, how rough they were, how they grabbed you so tight sometimes, but especially those thick fingers sliding into you.

“Look at me.”

You did so, mouth dropping as one finger from either hand disappeared inside your cunt. “Daddy.”

He shushed you as he started to pump his fingers, in and out, brushing against your walls and searching for that spot that made you lose your mind. “Did you miss daddy, sweetheart?”

You nodded.

“Yeah? Because you know only daddy can do this for you?”

“No,” you protested. “I missed you.”

“That’s not what I’m asking. I want you to tell me that you know that only I can do this to you, I’m the only one that knows how to fill,” he stressed the word as he added two more fingers inside you, “this desperate little cunt.”

“I know, daddy,” you promised.

“But did you try to let someone else?”

“No. Never.”

He hummed. “But you did go on a date with Dan Rifkin.”

You made the mistake of laughing a little. It was funny. To date, it was still the best bratty act you’ve ever pulled. He would be mad about it for months to come, maybe years if you kept reminding him about it.

He scowled. “You will be punished for that.”

You missed that, too. You missed Andy’s strict act and you especially missed that stinging feeling when you saw down after a long night of spanking. But you had crossed a line and you figured he was going to get a little creative. “How?”

He scoffed. “Haven’t decided yet, but I know I’m not going to let you come once.”

You rolled your eyes. “But how about now? Can I come, daddy? Or are you forgetting how to make me?”

Abruptly, he yanked his fingers away from you and before you could protest, he had your jaw in one hand and the belt in the other. He directed you to open your mouth again and once more, he shoved the belt into your mouth. It was more this time, he wanted you choking, at least a little.

For the second time, he slid his fingers inside you, in that same agonizing way. He spread his fingers apart, stretching you wide open.

Your eyes rolled into your head as you arched your back, dragging the back of your head on the hardwood floor.

He watched you, made sure it wasn’t too much, then he leaned down just slightly and spit on your cunt. The sound shocked you first, but the feeling had your face burning. You looked back down at him, he acted as if he hadn’t done it.

You angled your pelvis up, whining. Again. You wanted him to do it again.

He simply smirked. Not after what you just said. What he did next was purely for him, no matter how much pleasure you received from it. Your legs atop his shoulders shook, your hands clawed at his thighs, and even around the leather in your mouth, you were loud.

But he didn’t intend to finish you this way. After moving his tongue through you, teasing your entrance with the tip of it, dipping in just a little to get a taste of you, and painfully sucking your clit, he pulled away. As soon as he had you set back down, he moved back over you, cock resting against your aching core. He pulled the belt out, but in a gravelly voice told you not to close yet. Again, he spit, only this time with the purpose of making you taste yourself.

You swallowed before opening your mouth, silently pleading for more by sticking your tongue out. Instead, he shoved his fingers into your mouth, all four, stretching your lips. You were just about to start teasing his skin with your tongue when he yanked them out to shove into your pussy. The wet sound that followed was loud and embarrassingly telling of how much you liked what he had just done to you.

He only curled his fingers a couple of times before he pulled them out and brought them back to your mouth. He continued this routine several times but did so without warning or pattern. He always wanted you caught off guard for when he was about to move.

He didn’t stop until you were shivering and mewling utter nonsense to him. Then, he settled back again, pressing those first two fingers inside you again. He glanced up at you before adding the next two. “You think you can take me yet?”

You shook your head. “I think I need a little more.”

Finally, the third fingers and you were full of six of his fingers, more than he had ever given you. He allowed you time to adjust, using his thumbs to brush away your clit. He moved his fingers, slow, deliberate, as he slipped out from under you.

You spread your legs, hoping it would take a bit of the sting away. You reached up for his shoulders, desperate to hold onto something and stab your fingernails into his skin as a distraction. You could feel yourself getting wetter, excited that you were already so full of him but that you were about to get even more.

With your hips on the floor, his fingers pulled your pussy apart and he pressed the tip of his cock inside you, forcing his fingers to pull you open wider. He continued touching your clit, distracting you from the pain. “You okay, princess?”

You nodded quickly and it wasn’t as if you were lying, but this was a lot to take after so long without being fucked at all. But you would say or do anything to get more of him. This included pulling your legs up and pressing the insides of your thighs to his sides as your ankles crossed around him.

While his fingers were delicately pulling out, he fed you more of his cock until his hands were settled on your waist and he was buried completely inside you. He groaned lowly. “Fuck, how was I surviving without this pussy?”

It took a bit longer to get used to him. You knew it was because he was so hard, and you hadn’t even used a toy since you walked out on him. Seemed like a dumb idea, but you had always told yourself this moment would be even better if you held out—in case you were going to take him back. You felt stupid about that now. You felt stupid that you held out on him, that you thought you could live without this.

With his hold on your waist, he pulled you up the length of his cock and then yanked you back down. You shrieked, trying to pull him down on top of you, but he had other ideas. He moved your body as if you weighed nothing, pushing and pulling, practically fucking you like you were just there to get him off. The sound of your wet pussy filled the room, almost enough to drown out those small breaths escaping your parted lips or the eager grunts coming from him.

He moved one hand from you to get the belt. This time, he looped it around the back of your neck and wrapped both ends around his fist several times. Abruptly, he yanked you up and situated you on top of his lap.

Sitting on his cock as he rolled his hips up, deeper, harder, neck being teased by a belt, and you were suddenly reminded of all your feelings for Andy. Not only could this man fuck you like no one else, but each time was always an amazing experience because you trusted him more than you had ever trusted anyone.

Your legs were loosely wrapped around him but as they continued to slide down and onto the floor, he knew you were getting close. And you were close, he had a tight hold on the belt, tight enough that heavy breaths were not a smart idea. But all you could do was scream and gasp and plead, and you were choking and lightheaded, and his cock was pounding into your cunt, pelvis brushing your clit.

Your pussy was getting tighter, you couldn’t sit up without him helping you, and your eyes were glassy and your moans were frantic—he had forgotten how beautiful you were when he fucked you. He buried his free hand in your hair, yanking your head back as he wrapped his hand in the belt once more time. Leaning in, he began kissing and nipping at the underside of your jaw.

“You wanna come?” he taunted against your skin.

“Please, daddy.”

“Want me to fill you up, too?”

“Yes, yes! Please!” You were right there, so close, just a few more pushes from his hips. And your vision went white as your orgasm shattered through your body. You had never had such an exhausting finish, a ravenous one that took over every single part of you.

And just seconds later, his hips faltered and he was spilling into you. He let the belt go and wrapped his arms tight around you. Leaning over, he rolled onto his back and brought you with him.

You laid there on his chest, hands pressed to his skin, listening to the sound of his heart and his breathing. He was petting your hair and rubbing your back, kissing your head as he told you how good you had been for him.

It was just silent for several long minutes, but it was comfortable. He was enjoying being with you, sometimes he had worried that it wasn’t going to happen, that you were never going to forgive him.

It was you who spoke first, turning your head up to find him already looking down at you. “Can we go shopping?”

He scoffed. “Like I said, whatever you want.”

You smiled widely.

He realized he was probably going to regret encouraging you like that. He sat up with you, taking your jaw in one hand. “Never again. Do you understand?”

You arched an eyebrow. “Which part?”

“You’re not allowed to leave me. We’re going to communicate, okay? We are going to talk through things. This is obviously not just me being your sugar daddy anymore. We’re...something else.”

You pretended to consider it. “I guess.”

He hummed, kissing your forehead. “Aren’t you kind? But for the record, I forgot how obsessed I was with your pussy. I wouldn’t be able to live without it again. I’d chain you to the bed before you got away.”

“For the record,” you returned. “I never wanted to call you my sugar daddy. I always thought we were more, you were the one that shut that down. So, what I’m trying to say is that all of this is probably more your fault than mine, so I think I want a platform bed, a huge TV, and maybe—”

He placed his hand over your mouth, skillfully getting up and taking you with him with just one arm carrying you. “Remind me to pick up a gag.”

You shoved his arm away. “Does that mean we’re going to a sex store? Ooh, do you have another room in here? Can we make it a sex room? What chains exactly would you use to “chain” me  to the bed?”

chris tags:

@onetwo3000 @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @donutloverxo @kleohoneyao3 @cevans-fics @gotnofucks @sweet-pieces-of-nothing​

off to the races tags:

@youwillloveme @smuttywriter @blaqwidow91 @shamelessfangirl-3​

[wickedpact]

You can't just drop that "I read Forces Multiplied" bomb on us and not give a ten page written reaction.

[cracks knuckles] if u insist

nicky cant drive hc: destroyed. rip. also i loved how andy and nile stole those sports cars and were being badass and driving off the bridge & meanwhile joe and nicky were just absolutely vibing in the van

'heres the thing about power: people who have it think they deserve it' [shot of police car] i see u greg

5 whole panels being dedicated to booker not being able to unlock his door. booker not even seeing noriko sitting RIGHT THERE in the window at first. incredible

noriko being 24/7 horny was surprising. like wow all of the stuff i saw she did out of context was 100% equally horny in context as it was out of context. love that for her

i didnt think the 'andy + slavery' thing was handled as badly as everyone made it out to be when telling me about it. tho from the way it was talked about i had kind of figured the conflict between andy and nile re: slavery would be really racially charged (esp considering nile is a black american and would obvs have Thoughts on the subject in that regard) but like,, done in a cringey 'a-white-guy-obviously-wrote-it' kind of way? but it wasnt that. i mean. it makes sense that andy would be implicit in slavery through the years

i mean, like she says, is that not what people just did to each other in the aftermath of battles for thousands of years? and i really like how its pointed out that it was what she was raised with (in the beginning when you see her put shackles on that guy after the battle) but she also accepts responsibility for it and acknowledges that it was wrong and not just 'what people did'.

i like how from her expressions you can kind of tell baby andy knew it was off but she sets those feelings aside bc she felt angry. it explains how she felt but didnt make her out to be blameless in it. plus i mean. i dont know, the fact that andy was involved in a lot of morally shady stuff for 7000 years is not that wild for me. if you live that long youre just Going to be involved in some shit, and she didnt even have other immortals with her as positive community influences, she literally just did whatever the fuck she wanted for thousands of years

'i was worshipped as a god once' i mean, yeah no shit she wouldve been involved in some seriously fucked up stuff, gods were fucking scary back in the day

tldr it could use some polish but it wasnt that bad

tho everything people said about moose being boring was unfortunately a little true. sorry king i tried to be interested in you

joe and nicky writing verbal fanfiction about nile and moose was iconic. 'you seeing that?' 'i am definitely seeing that'

it was also extremely funny bc that was like 60% of their contribution to the whole comic, besides kidnapping copley. they came, they wrote some fanfic, they left. kings. at least in tog1 they had an excuse to be useless bc they got kidnapped

joe just found out his old friend who he thought was dead is alive (and also probably wants to murder them) and instead of investigating with andy he stopped to help nile up. champ.

nicky shooting noriko through andy was cool. rip to the concept since it wont happen in tog2

wanna see mr ejiofor deliver this line

on that note imo copley was. weirdly enough, more interesting in fm than in tog1. to me at least. the fact that andy let him live and he was so haunted by what had happened that he came back and sought them out despite knowing they would likely kill him for it bc he wanted to not only make up for what hed done but also to tell them what theyd done for the world was admittedly more interesting than andy just kind of drafting him to the cause and him going 'okie'

i like how nicky was drawn in this one. in opening fire he looks like a blob man but in fm he looks more like a very nice grampa with a very good dye job

'theres no pain like a broken heart' andy 🥺

noriko implying andy's never drowned. .. .idk about that one, she musta drowned sometime

joe and nicky came, they waxed poetic about nile's love life, they waxed poetic about grog, and then they left.

sports bras being a reason humanity is good. i mean..... okay, yeah.

i mean. wild but you cant exactly tell her shes wrong

i liked how noriko telling andy that their purpose is to make people suffer coincides with joe and nicky finding out that they actually did good all those years

joenicky in opening fire: jail for booker jail for booker for 100 years

joenicky when copley tells them he knows where booker is: WE'LL KILL YOU WHERE IS HE

joenicky when copley comes back: if your vibes come off as even remotely rancid we Will destroy you

joenicky 2 minutes later when copley helped them find booker: he made up some ground :)))) <3 lov you j cops

theyre forgiving af

moose: how old are you?? a hundred??? a thousand???

nile [vine voice]: I M 2 7 ?

alright andy you got me there

joe texts like my aunt

i dont know why noriko drowning andy in that car tickled me. Bad And Naughty Andromaches Get Put In The Pear Wiggler To Atone For Their Crimes.

the drowning sequence was cool

copley trying to talk to andy while she was like o_o at him was great

ive hit the picture limit but id seen that panel where nicky goes 'forgive me' as he kills a guy out of context and it was HILARIOUSLY anticlimactic for me to discover that there was literally no context to it. nicky just apologizes to random people he kills. i thought that guy was someone he knew or something. nope its just Some Guy that nicky didnt know from adam

nile's complaint that andy was especially brutal to the guys on the boat... i mean. . , how exactly does one kill a man with an axe and not be brutal about it?

it was funny how noriko kissed andy and the only people who seemed surprised by that were nile and also andy

nicky and joe's complete non-reaction to finding out noriko is alive And Evil Now is endlesly funny. they just left her on that boat and neither cared. i get book and nile not caring but joe and nicky knew her, and they just have 0 input on the subject of what to do with her

pinstripe suit guy!

joe and nicky and booker packing up and leaving with nile

andy blowing up at nile was A Moment tho

i dont know, i get why people didnt like the ending but its. .. . it makes more sense in the comicverse. bc the squad doesnt really. .. interact outside of jobs? i mean, think of the moon landing story in ttt. that was booker and joe and nicky doing a job and andy only showed up a for a couple minutes after it was done. or the brunch in the first issue of opening fire. the squad arent as tight in the comic, and andy often seems to do her own thing outside of work, so andy saying 'i dont want to do work anymore' and the squad being like 'alright bye then' makes more sense in this universe than the movie one

also i feel like greg was Trying to set up a thing where nile becomes the Leader of The Squad after andy dies but like. its not very well done since. . . i mean, nile hasnt spoken to booker since opening fire, (and she only knew him A Day). and shes known joe and nicky all that time, but there isnt really anything that indicates that they have any relationship at all, much less one that's grown. in all the comicverse the only time nile and nicky speak is in FM, and in that scene nicky tells nile about noriko. nile goes from someone who needs to be set aside to have background knowledge explained to her to being the Leader of the group with nothing in between. it kind of... comes out of nowhere.

on the other hand tho... i felt really bad for andy thru the whole thing. well, i always felt bad for andy, but in this one she seemed so miserable, especially since it really felt like none of the others actually.... cared about her. when noriko came back no one asked andy how she was doing (big question ik, but it wouldve showed they cared at least), nobody ever expressed any concern for her, no one even really seemed to want to be around her. in opening fire everyone was more distant than in the movie of course, but there were little moments where she would joke with joe, or nicky would try and comfort her, or stuff like that, but in FM it really felt like they just didnt really care about her. & in opening fire it felt a lot like andy's relationship with nile breathed some new life into her, but in FM it felt like all they did was argue. i get theyre not *as* close in the comics but it really felt like the only person who cared about andy at all was noriko (which was probably also how andy felt) but it just seemed to come out of nowhere. honestly i was reading and i was honestly agreeing with andy that she might just be better off if she did just die. opening fire, on the other hand, never make me feel that way

tho everyone made it sound like when the squad split up it was one of those cursed 'the found family leaves each other at the end of the journey' tropes. but guys i mean,,, this is the second installment out of three. that isnt the End. theyll come back in the third one and Dramatically Reunite to fight some baddies (probably those 'others' noriko mentioned). im guessing yitzhak fits into that too somehow.

anyways it wasnt That Bad but it made me kind of sad and the only Sweet Found Family vibes in it were when they saved booker. also they shouldve beefed up that nilemoose romance, it underwhelmed me. 6.5/10

i also ABSOLUTELY understand all of greg's comments about how you couldnt make FM directly into a movie, he always said that it had no plot and. i get it now. it really didnt have a plot sdfghjkl

[beyondd-dazedd]

EPISODE👏 REVIEW👏 hsmtmts season 2 episode 10: get ready for some enthusiastic writing and a little too much looking into details

first off seb doing the intro made my heart happy i love him

ok i know everyone has been saying it but there is no way in hell they’re winning the menkies. unless the writers just go with the main character favoritism route, there’s just no way. however for the sake of comedy, watching ashlyn give us everything in the transformation scene and ricky being an absolute disaster is SO funny to me. like shout out to joshua because that scene made me laugh so hard. also a trio i need more of is kourt, red and ej. i just feel like they would be dramatic gossipy bitches and i love that for them.

normally i think ms. jenn’s reactions are over the top but after seeing the shit show that just occurred 2 mins before... i think her reaction is very valid because oh god.

continuing with the theme of friendship dynamics we haven’t seen a lot of but we absolutely need more of, ashlyn and ricky!! that scene was so sweet and wholesome. i’m so so so glad the writers didn’t fall into the trap of making characters take sides after a break up. i just feel like it’s been done a million times before. but seeing ashlyn being so genuine when checking up in ricky made me so happy. the caswells remain being the superior characters (including gina obvs)

ms. jenn and mr. mazzarra are cute don’t get me wrong but they should’ve spent more time developing that relationship instead giving ms. jenn like 3 random love interests and that’s all i’ll say on that.

i love imagining what characters are saying when they’re just ad libbing. like what could ej, gina, ricky and red be talking about before carlos shows up to start the scene?? my guess is they’re all gushing about how amazing ash is and no i don’t take criticisms on that.

alright i’ll say it. the seblos drama is weak at best. they didn’t spend enough time developing it and kind of pushed it to the background so when it was one of the main focuses of the episode it was kind of like ok?? HOWEVER i did love the resolution to it and the deeper look into their individual characters. (i’ll talk more about this later)

carlos calling ms. jenn mother and everyone immediately knowing who he was talking about sent me omfg. but also who the fuck let these high schoolers try to figure out this transformation scene by themselves?? they collectively have 2 brain cells and they just bounce around between the 9 of them depending on the scene. but playful sleepover competition!! also gina nudging ej when he goes a little too ej 1.0 was everything.

i hate lily and i love sassy red. that’s all.

(im going to talk about the boys/girls sleepovers like they’re each one continuous scene respectively because it’s way easier than switching back and forth)

fun new friendship dynamics!! the boys!! sebbie and the girls! iconic. i know that the show is meant to be in a mockumentary style so we only see parts of the characters lives but i would give my left arm to see the boys getting closer and becoming friends. this is also the first scene where i really noticed ricky’s shirt. ricky is queer disney are just cowards. i’m not a big ricky/ ej shipper but the pretty boy had me feeling some type of way. carlos being worried about seb and their relationship and then red being like well this is why. bc he’s got a spy on the inside was peak friendship. but seriously disney?? just say gay. it’s not a bad word. now imma freak out about PORTWELL OMFG I WAS ALREADY FREAKING OUT DURING THIS SCENE SO YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW WELL I WAS DOING LATER ON. but ej just being like im not ready to put myself out there because of nini i don’t wanna get rejected... again. my heart went out to him. you can really see how much he’s grown as a person. but sure ej y’all are “buddies” also him saying the one thing i’m proud of from my time with nini was letting her go and ricky’s reaction to that hurt me to my core.

alright let’s talk about the girls and seb. first off i love that they’re actually working and the boys are doing fuck all LOL. seb actually talking about how he feels?? good for him. i hate that he thinks that carlos is only with him because there’s limited options but at least he’s talking about it. a moment of silence for ash’s scissor bucket (i won’t make a gay joke. i won’t make a gay joke. i won’t-) anyways... i really thought that maybe ash would know about portwell but it’s fucking EVERYONE. like y’all are that perceptive about other peoples relationships but not your own?? that’s why all y’all have relationship drama. gina not wanting to put herself out there because she’s afraid of getting hurt?? ouch. gina thinking ej is just being nice?? ouch but also gina, sis?? what. also nini reacting that way to the chocolates is so out of pocket. like 1) y’all aren’t dating anymore so what’s got you so pressed? 2) gina made it clear that they weren’t actually from ricky 3) nini you know they had some sort of chemistry before you and ricky got back together so this really shouldn’t be that surprising.

anyways the scene with ricky and carlos broke me. the decision for ricky to not show nini the song was so mature. despite wanting to get her back, he KNOWS that that would only drag her back and that’s not fair to her and he knows it. but his awareness of seblos’s relationship and wanting to help carlos work things out with seb was so wholesome and so sweet and is kind of a big moment of character development for him this season. like he was generally very selfish this season (again i’m a ricky apologist til the day i die but he was so selfish) and seeing him take the focus away from his problems to help carlos out was so sweet. also i need more ricky/carlos friendship moments.

kourt talking about howie learning her love language?? bitch you mean espionage?? i mean me too but that’s so fucking funny

ALRIGHT THIS IS THE PARAGRAPH WHERE I SCREAM ABOUT PORTWELL!!! i am so so so so happy right now about this. the fact that ej asked about risotto but for real was so satisfying and was blatantly like him saying i know we faked being in a relationship but what about it not being fake and omfg that’s so amazing. also gina being skeptical and asking if ash put him up to it and him saying not that i know of?? THE PARALLELS?? also gina this whole season has been talking about signs and finding reasons to stay, finding signs to know if someone is right for her and you can literally see the moment she realizes she said the same thing about the duke sweatshirt to jack. SHE KNOWS THIS IS HER SIGN and that’s so special to me. also ej’s nervous laugh after she says yes?? omfg. let’s look at ej’s character. historically he’s confident, cocky and generally puts on this facade of having his shit together but gina makes him nervous (in a good way). he doesn’t feel like he has to pretend to be confident around her. he’s showing her that he’s just as nervous as she is about this and that is just *chefs kiss* honestly not to be an andi mack stan but ej’s little nervous chuckle and ok after she says yes sounds like he’s letting out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding which seriously parallels tj after the tyrus confession. i’m just saying. ALSO GINA’S LITTLE EXCITED WALK BACK TO THE GROUP AHHHHHH

the seblos song?? i have no notes. it was incredible. frankie killed that shit. it was such a good song. so sweet. so wholesome. also ricky and carlos’s hug was so fucking meaningful to both of them and you can tell. ricky was absolutely beaming because he helped the two of them and it feels like a little bit of season 1 ricky shining through.

WHO THE FUCK LET A BUNCH OF HIGH SCHOOLERS RIG A KID IN THE AIR COMPLETELY UNSUPERVISED?? of course ricky fucking fell. that group shares 2 brain cells. obviously some dumb shit was going to happen

[takiki16]

Book of Nile: Getting Together Post-Canon Thoughts

OKAY so I maxed out my tag space on this post talking about the logistics of #book of nile, and then @themoonwheniamlost​ confirmed this as at least 50% of a good idea, so HERE IT IS, copy-pasted and with all the hashtags cleaned out and EXPANDED UPON because screw tag limits!

The thing about #book of nile is that it is very easy to talk about Booker falling in love with Nile - who wouldn’t?  But I need to block out how Nile falls in love with Booker without (1) centering Booker bc that is the OPPOSITE of why i ship this, and (2) without making this about Nile 'fixing' Booker because fixing Booker is BOOKER'S job. 

MORE UNDER THE CUT ABOUT BOOK OF NILE ORIGIN STORIES

SO. HEADING THE FIRST - SAD FRENCH JUDAS adn the very very easy matter of Booker falling in love with Nile.

I kind of like to think that it wasn't QUITE 'love at first sight' for Booker but it was a darn near thing? Because their connection was so close from that very 1st dream where Booker puts a hand to his throat and says 'i felt her die' to that moment they shared in the cave when they realized they were the only two immortals who had comparatively recent memories of their mortal families.  I mean Booker was sort of preoccupied for the whole movie with being Sad French Rat Judas with Copley, but I FIRMLY HEADCANON that he started doing Soulmate Math very soon after meeting Nile and soaking her presence in that first time.  If Andy had Quynh and Joe has Nicky, maybe...maybe after 200 years...Nile is the one Destined for Me?  And then AFTER canon in the secret Youngest Immortals Chat that Booker and Nile Definitely have there is Definite Pining on Booker’s end - think “I love a Noble Princess but am a sad undeserving man with issues so I’ll just hold this here torch from afar.”  AND THAT TAKES CARE OF BOOKER.

Now. HEADING THE SECOND.  NILE. NILE FREEMAN. AND HOW AND WHY SHE MIGHT CHOOSE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH SAD FRENCH RAT JUDAS OVER HERE

...gawd you guys. this is totally the fault of that Matthias Schoenaerts gifset where he goes under someone's skirt, but i am SO TEMPTED to just go whole hog romcom on this?

It was some kind of Bad Anniversary for Nile at some point during the 100 years  (listen, I’m increasingly fond of the 100-year exile as Free Real Estate to focus exclusively on Book of Nile) and Nile is lonely and sad and feeling like crap and ends up secretly visting Booker and getting sloppy drunk at his place because sometimes misery really does love company.  And Booker is an Absolute Gentleman and Practiced Drunk Shoulder to Cry on, and he takes the chair while she crashes in the bed because that’s what you do for the person you’ve been pining for. 

And then the next morning Nile wakes up feeling numb and empty and embarrassed, and when Booker brings her a cup of coffee she leans over and kisses him because she needs to feel something, some kind of connection to the living world. 

And Booker is just !!!!!! OH!!!!!!  I am a Sad Undeserving Man, but Nile Freeman is kissing me and if this is what she wants from me then I can 100000% do this for her even if it is only this once in our whole entire crappy immortal lives.  And THEN NILE QUITE SIMPLY GETS THE BEST LAY OF HER LIFE, because I cannot stretch my imagination to Booker having anything healthy emotionally to offer so soon after canon, but I CAN and WILL BELIEVE that he knows EXACTLY what to do with his mouth and his tongue and his hands and...you know.  Other titty-ban forbidden things. 

And afterwords, when her legs work again and Nile is getting dressed - Feeling Different - she turns around and looks over her shoulder.  And Booker is lying on the rumpled bed with the afternoon sunlight falling just so all disheveled, and he smiles at her and says mon cher, with a LITTLE BIT of sad pining showing through because despite his best efforts to keep his feelings to himself and Not Drag Nile Down With Him he is having Emotions.

Oh, Nile thinks.  Oh.  Maybe...?

And then she goes back to her place and has a SECOND CRISIS, because WTF???  This is SO MUCH of a Whole Bad Idea, she KNOWS what Booker did and what he is, which is Sad French Rat Judas, but she DID have um. A really. REALLY. good time?  And is there anyone else even available for her to date?  And how much does she reeeeallly want to get into this?  And maybe it was just a trick of the light or something?  How much is she willing to bank on how well she knows Booker?  Who, after all, had a wife and kids that he is VISIBLY not coping well with losing even 200 years later?  But also Nile starts running Soulmate Math and thinking...what if...destiny?

So Nile freaks out and doesn’t text Booker for a whole month, and the next time they meet for coffee she can’t stop blushing because whenever she looks at his face she remembers Exactly where his mouth has been and what it LOOKS like in...citrus situations and she’s more nervous and uncomfortable with him than she’s ever been before.

And BOOKER meanwhile is Working On Himself but also thinking FUQ I ruined everything I Took Advantage in an emotional moment and now she hates me and doesn’t want anything more to do with me and is just waiting for a moment to let me down kindly because Nile is So Good.  And she is absolutely right to do so but darned if I say anything before SHE says anything because at this point I absolutely cannot put this torch I’ve been carrying down before she explicitly extinguishes it.

so it’s GREAT (ㆆ ᴗㆆ) 

AND NOT TO START EVERY SINGLE PARAGRAPH OF THIS THING WITH ‘AND,’ but there is DEFINITELY a breaking point after like...a couple MONTHS of awkward stiff meetups whereas before it felt natural - the two youngest immortals sneaking around together and sharing a coping space.  Nile can’t take it anymore and just says LISTEN do you actually like...LIKE LIKE me or do you NOT like me because that was a STUPENDOUS morning and early afternoon and you gave me this Really Intense Significant Look, but also you’ve literally said nothing about it to me since then and I’m cracking under the strain because I won’t do casual relationships when there’s literally only 5 of us in the pool and you’re the only other single one and i have NO IDEA what i”m doing and also dating you would be a TERRIBLE idea due to so many reasons??????

And Booker is like YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT dating me would be a terrible idea but...of COURSE I like-like you???  I just wasn’t sure if I wanted to dump this whole garbage fire of Sad Drunk Judas on your beautiful new immortal life?  I have no idea what I’m doing either but I’m kind of in love with you and in love with the idea that We Could Be Together and maybe eternity Wouldn’t Suck but I didn’t want to say anything because you could do SO much better and I don’t want to stand in the way of that?

Which is SUCH A BEAUTIFUL image to have, because even though at this point Nile can see a century coming on and Booker is 200+ years old, there is a strong flavor of “We, the two youngest in this classroom, are Figuring Out some things?”

I DON’T KNOW HOW TO RESOLVE THIS, but at some point there is a dramatic pause and a removal to a more romantic setting preferrably by the water, and Booker kisses Nile’s hand. In the silence after words.  Very old fashioned and chaste and good - he bows instead of lifting it to his lips - and you all can take things from there.  

[jonesinghardy]

No More Spitting Feathers 02/?

PAIRINGS: Warren Worthington III x Reader  WARNINGS: injury, blood, implied drug use RATING: T+, will be raised later.  WORD COUNT: 2.2k INSTALLATIONS: Part 01 AUTHOR’S NOTE: Dedication and thanks to Andi @venombxby​ for discussion and honorary mentions to Monica @rosesvioletshardy​ and Wella for inspo. This is written in second person bc I have never been able to get on board with Y/N trends, and the reader is a mutant with a limited mix of healing, telekinesis and some empathic inclinations. 

The night is never as dark as you’d like in a city, and no matter the hour, night owls are bound to be turning their gaze onto anything that moves above the shadows. 

He casts quite a shadow. 

Dove.

You don’t speak much after he agrees to go with you. There is a stalemate between the two of you for many minutes before he offers an arm and helps you up, getting you to a more comfortable place in the warehouse to rest until you could stand on your own. 

You didn’t think he’d be able to fold his wings enough to hide them, you thought it would hurt too much, but he manages to do it anyway and tucks them away into a long coat that he found in the disused warehouse staffroom, along with a large umbrella that helps conceal him better.

Once you could stand you found a dusty bathroom with running water and managed to clean your arms and face of blood and wrangle your hair into something less dishevelled. You also took off all your absurd jewelry, cleaning it all with hot water and chucking it into the same locker you find a pair of shoes that are too big but are better than trying to walk barefoot. 

You get the privilege of draping his leather jacket over your shoulders, which doesn’t exactly keep you warm given the modifications he made to the back to accommodate his wings, but you suppose you’d be colder without it. 

You walk in silence side by side for most of the journey, and calling it such is no exaggeration. It only takes half an hour for the pain to creep into his wing again, especially with how he has them folded against his back— you feel it, and have to breathe through the discomfort, the one aspect of your powers that you can’t turn off, but that thankfully doesn’t wipe you out the same way healing or telekinesis does. 

It takes three hours, and neither of you seeks a break, somehow knowing that stopping would benefit neither of you. He gets more tired though, but you can tell he relaxes a bit when the city falls away and the trees thicken, and the people and cars become few and far between.

The safe house looks abandoned from the outside, and to your benefit, it has thick overgrowth around its perimeter that provides plenty of privacy. All of the windows are either frosted or boarded up save for the stained glass windows on the old domed church that will be your shelter. 

You find the key where you expect it, and as soon as you enter you’re working on autopilot. You throw off the shoes that have given you blisters, walk across the confused space to a large set of shelves and pick out a change of clothes that don’t quite fit but are better than the tiny cocktail dress you’ve had to trek your way here in. 

Dove throws off the coat and drops onto the nearest cot, groaning as he stretches out his wings. You shudder from the incomparable empathic impression it leaves in your back. You change without caring if he looks (he doesn’t), putting on the pants and a too-large shirt, collecting a blanket from a crate in the corner and yourself dropping onto a cot not too far from where he’d lain down. You pass out after you heal your blistered feet. 

You sleep for eighteen hours. 

He sleeps for twelve, and when he awakens he’s hungry and hungover, aching in unpleasant but not unfamiliar ways. You can feel the malaise even though it doesn’t wake you, creeping into your body and your dreams and then fading once he freely navigates the space and finds the food and water kept in the makeshift pantry. 

You feel better when you wake, but you’re ravenous, and dig into whatever shelf-stable item seems most appealing— you’re still chewing when you go and find him, having made himself a more private corner to relax in with cushions, two cot mattresses and a few blankets. 

Swallowing doesn’t quite soothe the scratch in your throat, and you notice some subtly floating feather particles in the air, leaving you to idly wonder how much he sheds. 

“Are you well enough to heal me now?” he asks, filling the silence. You’re not sure if he believes you are, he seems tired and resigned.

“No,” you reply. “Not significantly anyway.”

He levels you with an incredulous look. 

You sigh. “I could give myself an aneurysm if I try to heal you too fast.” 

“What can you do, then?” 

“I could have you flying again in ten days,” you say, “that won’t put too much strain on me.” 

His wing, the undamaged one, flutters slightly. “Fourteen.”

“What?”

“Take fourteen days. You were like a rag doll at the warehouse, Häschen, you’re no use to me like that. You think you can do ten days— I don’t have anywhere to be— we’ll do fourteen.”

You look at him for a moment, trying to spot some ulterior motive and figure he must be doing the same. 

“Okay, alright. Two weeks.” That’s probably how long you’ll need to arrange extraction anyway. 

You swallow again against the scratch in your throat and take a deep breath. 

“You need a tour?” you ask, feeling awkward. 

He shakes his head. “I looked around while you were sleeping.” 

“The church is free-reign,” you say, explaining anyway, “the rest of the building is not really safe, but isn’t off-limits.” You shrug. “The shower room is over there.” You point. “Towels and soap are in the baskets… they’re all labelled.” 

“You planning to leave me alone here, Häschen?” he asks, sitting forward slightly and canting his head to the side. 

You both react when he strains his wing, and you try to hide your whimper with a cough. His wings shudder and the feathers tighten up, drooping slightly as he sits back against the wall with a slight grunt of pain.

“I want to get some supplies from the store… like better food,” you explain with a shrug. You also want to get him some medicine to tide him over between your attempts to heal him. 

“Are you going to walk?” 

You shake your head. “There’s a car stored on the property, I have what I need. I shouldn’t be more than forty minutes.”

He doesn’t say anything further, and it feels too invasive to watch him struggle through his pain.

“You want anything?” you ask, already planning to get him some clothes. 

“No.”

“Okay. What clothing sizes do you wear?” 

The look he gives you is almost a smirk, a raised brow and a quirk of his lip that makes you flush. You look away in embarrassment and clear your throat again. 

He tells you the sizes. “You don’t like my clothes?” he asks. 

“That’s— that’s not the point,” you say, and motion at him, his pants and boots, the lack of a shirt, the modified leather jacket he’d taken back while you slept. “That’s all you have.”

He shrugs with his hands. “Do what you want.”

“I will.”

“See you in an hour, then.” He seems inclined to give you more time than you think you’ll need.

— 

The subtle hiss and splash of water greet your ears from across the echoey safe house when you return. You took less than the hour, but more than the forty minutes to get everything done. You put the bags down on the tables that make up the kitchen (which isn’t much of a kitchen at all. There is an old fridge, two hot plates, a toaster oven and some cookware and dishes next to a deep industrial sink).

There is steam coming from the shower room, and when you get closer with the bag of clothes you got for him, you feel a malaise creep into your body. 

“Dove?” you call, but he doesn’t answer.

You put down the bag and go to the door, not sure what you’ll find, but hardly wanting to violate his privacy nor open yourself up to any teasing if you’ve misinterpreted the empathic impression. 

A small gasp leaves your lips. His wings are almost totally clean now, free of the dirt and char and blood that had been caked on them— some of which sits over the drain grate to his right. Feathers are missing from his left wing, and it continues to droop, but what concerns you is how he’s kneeling on the floor with his head against the wall, taking in shuddering breaths. The wings hide his nakedness almost completely, but that hardly crosses your mind as you step into the room.

“Dove?” you say again, more urgently now, your new shoes splashing on the wet floor as you cross over to him. 

It’s a rather bare room, stripped of all curtains and half-stalls, with only a dozen showerheads set a few feet apart around the space. He has two showers running to cover all of him, and you gasp when you feel how hot the water is, yanking the tap to the left to make it cold and then reaching over him to do the same to the other. 

“What are you doing!” your voice is louder than you intend, and he tenses, groaning when cold water penetrates whatever daze he was in. You get down on one knee and grab his face between your hands. He’s hot hot hot, and not just from the water, flushed. He startles, wings jerking and feathers fluffing, and he gives a slight grunt of alarm.

“Hey, hey, it’s me— it’s just me.” 

He doesn’t quite relax but he seems to calm, bowing his head slightly and shivering. You carefully reach up to turn off both showers and bring your hand to his neck. You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to focus through the haze and urgency. 

“What are you doing…” he says dully, lifting a hand to grasp your forearm. He groans when he feels the initial relief of your healing. “Don’t, you’re not— I’ll be fine—”

“I can handle it, you’re not well,” you reply, almost scolding. He makes a sound of acknowledgement but speaks no further, he keeps his hand on your arm. 

You don’t find what you’re looking for, you assumed it would be an infection from the fracture, but his whole nervous system is rioting. You quickly readjust, your fingers pressing against his neck, by the nape. It’s not the healing you expected him to need, but you hadn’t exactly gotten the chance to examine him and come up with a plan. Your healing balances his autonomic nervous system, calming the sympathetic and re-engaging the parasympathetic. He’d need more help than that, you can tell, but easing his distress is your primary goal. 

A drop of blood hits the floor, and his hand squeezes your arm. Your nose is bleeding.

“That’s enough,” he says, his voice much more controlled now.

“I’m alright,” you assure him, “I know my limits, I can do a bit more…” You aren’t lying but you know how far you can push yourself before you get as bad as you were last night. You can do more now that you’re touching him too, that always makes you more precise.

His breathing even outs and his heart rate calm, and his head bows in relief after another long moment. Your bloody nose gets worse, but you set him up better this time, stimulating his immune system and provoking a healing response throughout his body, natural pain relief. It would help his body help itself until you could resume your efforts tomorrow. 

You move your hand away from his neck and move it to under your nose. The leg of your pants is wet when you stand, and you turn away but he gives your arm a little tug, making you look back down at him. His face isn’t as flushed now, and there’s a different kind of pain in his eyes, something non-physical. Something like guilt. 

“I didn’t deserve that,” he says gravely. You slowly pull your hand away. 

“You were in distress, I wasn’t going to leave you like that.” 

His wings twitch, ruffling carefully. “Some pain deserves to be felt,” he argues weakly. “Especially for something of my own doing.”

“Withdrawal isn’t a penance, Dove.” When he meets your gaze, you think he might be searching for judgement, but he won’t find any. He looks away.

“It’s an unfair strain on you.”

You turn away, still holding your bloody nose. “I can’t just pick and choose what I heal. If you’re sick I can’t fix your wing effectively.” You huff, turning away. “And I’m fine. It’s not as draining when I can touch you… I left you some clothes by the door. If you really don’t want to waste my efforts, you’d better get some rest. Your body can do the work itself until tomorrow.”

You start out of the room deliberately, shoesfalls splashing wetly. As you pass the threshold, the echoey walls of the shower room amplify his quiet words just enough for you to hear.

“Thank you.”

You keep going without acknowledging it.

[prettybiching]

well since requests are open for John King 👀👀 (i’ve never actually requested anything so don’t judge) what if the reader is somehow introduced to him through one of his co-anchors (who knows the reader has a crush bc of all that glorious election coverage), and we see what would happen maybe on a first date?? it doesn’t have to be smutty but i certainly wouldn’t be opposed..i love your writing btw!!! blessing us in this (small) John King fandom

Dessert

Pairing: John King x fem! reader Warning: 18+ mature scenes (oral f receiving), swear words and sexual innuendoes. Viewer’s discretion is advised, you’re responsible for your media consumption. Word Count: 2.5k words Note: I changed it up a bit, hope you don’t mind :)

Anderson Cooper, ever the stoic news anchor loved to play matchmaker for his friends. It was a trait Andy had managed to rub off on him, but he enjoyed it more than he'd like to admit.

Y/N had involuntarily become the latest victim of his match-making tendencies.

She didn't mean to babble out her newfound infatuation with his colleague, John King, to him but Anderson and Andy had managed to get her drunk, absolutely wasted. Before she could stop herself, she was slipping out all the unholy thoughts she'd been dreaming since election week.

The teasing that followed was relentless. It didn't help that Y/N had preliminarily promised to accompany Anderson to DC. She just hoped she wouldn't have to face the silver fox himself.

-----

She knew something was terribly wrong the moment she saw the wicked smile etched on Anderson's face.

"Uhm, why are you smiling like that?" she asked, her eyes wide with trepidation as Anderson let himself into her hotel room.

"You, young lady," he trailed, heading straight for the unpacked suitcase that laid on her bed, "have a date tonight."

Her mouth hung wide open in disbelief and horror, "What?!"

"Yup," he answered, not bothering to turn around, ruffling the contents of her luggage, every so often examining the articles of clothing.

"I don't wanna go on a date," she whined, throwing her head back. Dragging her feet to where Anderson stood, making an absolute wreck of her belongings, she plopped herself on the bed, tugging out her lips and staring at him with pleading eyes.

At last, he halted at his action, clumsily throwing the blouse he had in his hands in the briefcase before turning towards her. "Trust me, you'll make me the godfather of your future children after tonight."

"T-tonight?" she sputtered, jolting out of bed. There was no way she was going on that date now, she didn't even know who he was!

"Anderson, I love you, but a heads up would've been nice," she sighed, placing her hands on her hips.

Anderson stroked his chin for a second, in thought before scrunching his face, "Nope, where's the fun in that?"

Y/N gave him a deadpan look, slumping her shoulders. She knew sooner or later, she'd have to accept defeat. There was no way she was winning against Anderson Cooper. "Will, you at least tell me who it is?"

He smirked, mischief was written all across his face as he shook his head, "You already know what I'm about to say."

She groaned, taking a few steps towards him before clumsily planting her forehead on his shoulder. "You're the worst!"

Wrapping his arms around her figure, he let out a laugh, his body vibrating beneath her. "You know you love me."

"No, I don't."

------

After Y/N's long foreseen defeat, Anderson dragged her to go shopping with him stating that her limited clothing 'just wouldn't do'.  She went along without a fight, admitting that she didn't pack anything she could wear on a date.

Despite going along with her best friend's words and having full faith in his match-making abilities, she wasn't sure how much of a success the night would be. Not when her mind could only fixate on the image of a certain news anchor between her thighs.

However, she didn't want her silly fantasies to get in the way of her actual love life and with the help of Anderson's picky taste, decided on a dress for the evening. Although the black half-slit bodycon wasn't something she'd usually wear, she felt confident in it, and that was all that mattered.

As she was on her way to the outdoor French restaurant near Washington Harbour that her date had picked for the night. She knew the restaurant was fancy from all the reviews she'd seen online.

As the uber driver drove closer and closer to the destination, Y/N was a bundle of nerve. She didn't know what to expect, hell, she knew nothing about him at all aside from Anderson's confidence that the night would go well.

The car came to a screeching halt in front of the park-like restaurant, fairy lights and intertwining vines of leaves decorating the area. 'What's the worst that could happen?" she let out a sharp breath, trying to calm her nerves as she exited the vehicle.

She made her way to the reception, her eyes advertently scanning her surroundings to spot a familiar face. "Hi, my name's Y/N L/N, I believe I have a reservation?"

The receptionist gave her a practised smile before leading her to her table, "right this way, Ms L/N."

Y/N followed her lead, her steps being clumsy from the knot of nerves forming in her stomach and her heart stopped when she saw the man standing up as she made her way towards him. John fucking King.

She was going to kill Anderson.

Unable to move a muscle, she froze at her feet as he approached her. He had a crisp perfectly fitted black suit on and a warm smile on his lips that had her knees buckling. She just hoped she didn't look like a lunatic in front of him.

"You okay there, Y/N?" he mused, flashing his teeth.

Crossing her arms across her chest, she opened her mouth, trying to form a coherent thought. "I- yes, I'm okay," she stammered, squirming under John's unmoving gaze.

She had met John a couple of times in the past, none of the interactions was long enough to be considered memorable. She was always afraid of making a fool out of herself. Seemed like she was compensating for all of those in one go.

John didn't look convinced but didn't push her on it any further. Instead, he extended his elbow towards her with a quirk of his brow, "shall we?"

Awkwardly she interlocked her arms with his and followed his lead, all the while making sure she didn't fall face-first onto the floor.

They stopped in front of a table in the back corner of the patio; mostly hidden away from plain sight. Y/N smiled, knowing Anderson must've told him that she preferred such setting.

John quickly untangled their arms, preventing her from moving further as he pulled out a chair, gesturing towards her to sit. She flashed him a grateful smile, overwhelmed by all of his efforts. Was she ever going to stop smiling in front of him?

Once she was seated, John took his place across from her, fixing his suit jacket as he did. She tried her best to divert her gaze from his hands, but it seemed near impossible. She was sure she'd faint before the night came to an end.

Finishing his task, he turned to face her, his entire focus towards her.  Clearing her throat, Y/N shifted at her spot. "how awfully did Anderson bully you into this?" she chuckled, trying to soothe her nerves.

Squinting his eyes, he tilted his head sideways before shrugging, "he didn't bully me at all really. He merely put forth the suggestion, and I was down."

Pursing her lips, she paused for a moment before shaking her head, laughing. It wasn't until she took in John's earnest expression did she realise he wasn't joking. "Seriously?"

He nodded. "However," he began, a slight remnant smile gracing his lips as he wriggled his index finger at Y/N, "I did tell Anderson to tell you, but he was insistent, and you remain oblivious about our date."

Her mouth hung open in disbelief as she leaned back into her chair, muttering through gritted teeth, "I'll kill him."

John let out a laugh, his eyes gleaming with amusement as he insisted, "Please don't. I have much to thank him for."

She tilted her head towards him in confusion, waiting for him to continue.

John averted his gaze, a nervous chuckle erupting from his throat, "I might've never had the courage to ask you out without his meddling."

She blinked, her eyes widening slightly at the revelation. "Y-you wanted to ask me out?" she sputtered, leaning forward.

As if her words had flicked a switch in him, he straightened his back, the earlier nervousness was long gone as a smug smile took over his features. "Also..." he trailed, interlocking his hands on the table.

"He may or may not have accidentally spilt that you have a crush on me?"

"No." "Yes." "No, shut up."

"Truce?" he quirked his brow, reaching his hand across the table for hers. Y/N eyed his hand warily before letting out a sigh and giving in. "Fine."

"I can't believe you two were basically conspiring against me this whole time," she whined, her lips tugging out into a pout.

She should've known Anderson wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut for too long. However, she couldn't believe her own eyes that the gorgeous man in front of her reciprocated her feelings.

Unaware of the butterflies fluttering in her stomach, John cooed squeezing her hand, "but wouldn't you say it's come to a favourable conclusion?"

She couldn't deny that everything had worked out in her favour. Without her best friend's meddling, she would've never gotten the courage to admit her feelings for John.

Once the pout disappeared from her face, John reclined back into his chair, her hand still in his. "Now, how about we get started with some wine?"

------------

The date was a definite success, she would say. After the initial awkward passed, with some alcohol in her system, she found herself more comfortable around John. Not to mention that he was effortlessly the most charming man she'd ever encountered.

She had tried to restrain herself from staring at him when he made the smallest movement, but it was near impossible. She was completely enamoured by him. All the flirty smiles, casual brushing of their legs, teasing touches and lingering glances didn't help either. He knew what he was doing, that smug bastard.

John was in the middle of an amusing story, something that had happened at work that week. Y/N wished she could say she was listening, but she was far more distracted by his hands that he sporadically used as he spoke.

"Y/N? he called her name, snapping her back to reality.

"Yes?" she answered, tugging in her bottom lip as she stared at him with round eyes.

He smirked, having caught her not-so-subtle gaze. "I said, I was hoping to have some dessert if you would allow it."

Her lips twitched, not missing the mischief behind his eyes as he spoke. She would've missed it if it weren't for the way his pupils dilated as he uttered the words.

Wordlessly, she leaned forward, reaching her hand out to touch the side of his face. John tilted his head, kissing the inside of her palm as her fingers hovered over the dip of his jaw, the scent of his aftershave making her heart pound a little faster.

"Yes, of course," she murmured, almost inaudibly, her eyes locked into his aquatic ones. "Although, it'd like for you to have it elsewhere."

On cue, John pulled his hand back and fixed his tie before calling out for their server, asking for the bill. The two bickered for a moment, Y/N insisting they split the bill, but he was having none of it, ending the argument by saying she could pay for their next date.

Yes, the next one. There was going to be another one after this evening. It made Y/N smile more than it should've.

He drove the two back to his place, the car ride going painfully slow. Neither of them spoke during the journey. Instead, John kept his hand on her thigh, the hand sliding closer to her heated core throughout the ride.

As soon as the door to John's apartment closed shut, his lips were pressed hard against hers as he led the two towards the dining table. She felt the table dig into her hips from behind as he hovered over her. He wasted no time in grabbing her by the waist and lifting her up on the surface, moving his lips down to her jaw and neck as he hummed against her skin.

She ran a hand through his hair, breathing in as his other hand ghosted over her hip, running down then back up before it made its way underneath her dress, tugging at her panties. “Are you fond of these?”

“Yes,” She breathed out, her eyelashes fluttering, “Don’t destroy my clothes.”

John smirked, then leaned over her, kissing her again as he focused on pulling the tie open as he pushed her back flat against the cool wood. There was no barrier but her dress between the two. He quickly unzipped the back of her dress before she shrugged it off her body and threw it to a corner. Grabbing one of her thighs, he pushed her legs up and apart. He dropped down to one knee between her legs, hooking his arms under her as he pulled her closer and dropped his head to kiss her thigh slowly, tongue darting out onto her skin.

She was already breathing hard, her mind a little fuzzy from the wine, skin burning with every touch. John was overwhelming, in an incomprehensible way, and she lifted her hips as he rid her of her underwear in a flash, fingers sliding across her slowly.

Moaning, she slid her hand through his hair, falling flat on the table as his tongue wandered over her skin, teasing and sliding until he pushed a finger into her slowly and buried his face between her legs.

“Darling,” He urged her, looking up briefly as the vibrations of his words made her moan again. “Feel free to be loud.”

Her eyes rolled back into her head as he began to move his finger, adding a second one as his tongue moved against her clit, pressing against her as his hands expertly moved against her skin, pulling her closer and then pressing a hand against her stomach as the pressure began to build. She rolled her hips forward on the table, breathing harder and harder as she tried to hold back, but the noises kept getting louder as she pressed against him and softly whispered his name.

He was relentless as he moved faster, jerking her hips almost fully off the table as he groaned against her, sucking on her clit harshly and moving his fingers faster, curling them up and angling his wrist. Her other hand jerked down, grabbing onto his hand as she gasped and arched off the surface, the other hand tugging on his hair as she jerked against him, feeling the waves of warmth and overwhelming shock as her orgasm hit her hard enough that he turned his head and bit down on her thigh, prolonging the aftershocks.

When he pulled back, he moved his hand, sliding it out of her and then bringing it up to her mouth, pushing her lips open. Obliging, she took his digits in, moaning as she tasted herself, her eyes fixated on his intense gaze. Pulling them out, he closed his eyes, licking his fingers clean and looked up at her with a smile.

“Would you like to stay for the evening?”

As if there was any doubt.

[mayabishopapologist]

upon rewatch:

vic and travis were easily the best part of this for me. comedic genius, me thinks. them moving in together just makes sense. i been waiting. hope this means we get more travic shenangians bc it's all i want really. also excited to see a house set that isn't maya's living room and kitchen lol

oh & travis' DAD??????? what.

like it's not 1992 or even 2006?! the 'raging homophobe was gay all along omg surprise' plot? played out. i mean i def screamed when travis revealed his grindr secret was his father(!!!)—(let me be your daddy? nooooshshakakakdh!!!) but it's the 21st century let's wisen up w the tropes abc.

very interested 2 see how they... deal with all that though. hope it doesnt get home of phobic :)

but yeah poor travis; his dad was denying him, bc he was denying himself. and poor his dad(idk his name). and poor travis mom. just. poor montgomery family. they all need some deep healing lol

ok so maya.

maya... the tie was magnificent. im not a uniform kinda gal but that get up she wore to scold sullivan? whew!

didnt even hear what she was saying i was focused on the look. but yeah, v glad she told him off, it absolutely was his fault and now he's gotta start from the top. happy they didnt twist it around on maya somehow (as this show loves 2 do). other than that, she didn't do too much.

i mean, i would have liked to see she and carina communicate (call,text,messenger pigeon anything) but it's the premiere so ill give em a break. do hope the 0.002 seconds carina was on-screen isnt, like, an indication of screen time to come. it's not like they promoted stefania(series regular baby!!) and dont have a storyline or plan for carina(or their relationship)right? abcshondaland would never do that right. they would never do that. lol.

& andy's mom. kay i thought was going to be... hm just more. ofc post-partum and depression are really heavy and im glad theyre exploring the intricacies of motherhood and depiticing a mother struggling with the expectations/ limitations of parenthood. and i liked what she said about hardly anyone questioning fathers but mothers always having like extra pressure or whatever. it is %100 a double standard. but im also dead? like she really up and left andy for good and told her husband 'tell her i died idk. but im out xo' lmaoooo.

interested 2 see where they plan to go from there. and i want like actual scenes and not flashbacks. i think we've moved past disjointed storytelling in the 4th season of greys anatomy spinoff: station 19. but maybe that's just me.

jack. my boyyyyyy. hope we get to see him be mentally well this season lol. him and inara(?) are sweet. but, like...can he just take some time to understand and reflect on himself/get better before he dives head first into another relationship? bc she has a kid and the fall out from them rushing into this would be Not Good.

dean... lol.him and sasha aka offbrand vic. pleaseeee. he needs to free this girl he knows he dont want her!!

ben and bailey!! actual adults and only ones w sense on this show lol. love them.

all in all, it was fine.

didnt love the pandemic storyline. but i do get it, they're essential workers, it just makes sense. and so far it's been explored carefully/sensitively so i hope the rest of the season follows suit.

[alit0my]

You know those fanfics, 5 times (something) plus 1. So five times someone on the team taught Booker something. And since it was he who taught. (maybe with OT3) {for example: teaching a language, cooking, fighting with a sword}

hello anon! idek if you still want this fic bc its been so long... but i have finished it! no ot3 this time im afraid, just didnt fit well with where i took this... hope you enjoy!

~

1 - Russia, 1812

When they first found him in Russia, they barely understood one another and had to use Andromache’s passable French to communicate. The Asian woman beside her named Quynh stared at him, as if looking into his soul as he gasped out words of conversation as he recovered from another hypothermic shock. The two men were paired off, keeping a close eye on their surroundings and ignoring the conversation altogether as they did not understand.

”The first thing we will do,” Andy said, handing another wooly coat his way. ”Is teach you a language we can all speak.”

”Like hell you will. I’m to return to my family,” he replied, wrapping the coat around him tighter. Andy shook her head and huffed, glancing at Quynh beside her.

”When you return in fifty years, when your family is dead, we will teach you Russian.”

”Or you could learn better French,” Booker snapped, cursing the entire world under his breath as his limbs shook uncontrollably.

The corners of Andy’s lips curled upwards slightly.

(Back then, Booker paid no mind to this. But now, he knew it was the introduction to Andy’s competitive side.)

It was thirty-eight years later when Booker returned. Andy had gotten better at French, and Booker grumbled at the fact that he now had to learn Russian, as per their unofficial agreement.

He wasn’t half bad at Russian, but he wasn’t particularly good at it either.

~ 2 - Italy, 1850

As he returned to the group after the passing of his son, the last of his true family, Quynh pulled Booker aside and placed a bow in his hands. She watched as he pulled the bow string back slightly, testing the recoil of the weapon as if he was examining its limits. Booker was just trying to not break the thing.

Quynh was scary, and Booker did not want to mess with her.

”Now aim at the target,” she had told him, nodding her head to the tree as she placed an arrow in his other hand. ,em>”Aim, and fire.”

Booker did as he was told.

Booker missed the tree by a mile.

Quynh tutted and put her hands on her hips, before taking another arrow out of the quiver on her back.

”Try again,” she said, almost encouragingly. ”We have time. I’ll make sure you can handle a bow almost as good as me.”

Booker ended up being half as good as Quynh, which they both saw as an achievement.

(He could never be as good at archery as Quynh, but it was the thought that counted at the time. Really, Booker should have been grateful for the distraction.)

~ 3 - Japan, 1894

Nicky was sitting at the kitchen table cleaning his sniper rifle when Booker walked in, still half asleep. Pausing in his tracks, Booker rubbed at his eyes and looked at the weapon on the table, never having really seen it out of its case which Nicky kept stored under his bed in their various safehouses.

Nicky looked up at locked eyes with the youngest, beckoning him over to sit beside him.

”I will show you how to clean this, and then if you want, how to use it,” Nicky said, picking up the scope and rubbing the rag gently across the glass. Booker nodded and watched silently before Nicky handed him a part and a new rag. ”Gently, don’t rush or you may scratch the metal.”

Booker wasn’t sure how a piece of cloth would scratch metal, but he dared not say. Nicky was allowing him into his space, to help clean his most prized possession.

When the weapon was cleaned, Nicky showed Booker how to reassemble the rifle before picking it up and beckoning him outside.

”We will set up here, and I will teach you how to shoot,” Nicky explained as he set up the tripod that would hold the barrel steady. ”Come, look down the scope.”

Booker could not see a thing, and Nicky gently nudged his head until he gasped, suddenly seeing the tin can in the distance.

”Now line it up, and shoot.”

Booker missed, but Nicky’s eyes gleamed.

(It was something that Booker looked back on fondly as he sat in his French apartment surrounded by booze.)

~ 4 - Egypt, 1948

”Where is your sword, Booker?” Joe exclaimed whenever they were gearing up for a mission. Booker looked at him then the others, who all had a sword strapped to their bodies whereas he only had an assault rifle and a handgun.

”I.. Don’t have one?”

Joe scoffed. ”I will change that. When we are done I will teach you how to wield a sword.”

Booker objected, which fell upon dead ears as the team went back to gathering their gear. Furrowing his brow, Booker looked down at his assault rifle and started to feel anxious. Was knowing how to wield a sword some kind of necessity to be in this strange team of immortals?

(He found out later, the next day in fact, when Joe had woken him up at the break of dawn with his scimitar in one hand and a longsword in the other. Joe was always the early riser, and the most energetic. Booker missed him the most.)

”Here, I will train you the art of the sword,” Joe smiled, but Booker could see the excitement shining through his eyes. ”Try to strike me.”

Booker looked at him incredulously, but swung the blade at him.

He ended up on his ass with Joe standing above him, scimitar pressed lightly on his throat.

”You take too big of a swing, leaves too much gap for the enemy to strike,” Joe explained, removing the weapon from Booker’s neck and holding a hand out to help him up. ”This will be fun. Bonding, if you will.”

”Joe, no one even uses swords anymore?”

Booker ended up on his ass again, in record time.

~ +1 - France, 2020

Booker hadn’t heard from them in six months, as per their non-contact rule, but he hadn’t expected a package to arrive at his front door with his alias on it. Curious, he placed his glass of water (which still tasted of whiskey from the night before) on the counter and picked up the box, setting it down on his kitchen table.

He stared at it for a while, not sure what to make of it as he decided to rip open the box before he could change his mind. Inside were a bunch of letters each with his name written in different handwriting, a few pictures and five small magnets that represented each member of the team.

Booker picked up the first letter from Andy, skimming through the words quickly before the tears fell on the paper and ruined it for good.

’...miss you Book…...Nile’s idea to……..considered your biological family……….struggling to cope……..should have listened to you more, and for that I’m so sorry. You taught me that there is more to life than what we do, and I should have seen that back in the 1800’s and not belittled you for it. I love you Book, see you soon.’

Quynh’s letter was short as sweet, but mainly contained phrases in many languages calling him a dumbass and pictures of him practising with the bow.

’Next time, maybe try to be a perfect shot before you decide to cross us you moron…….I hope you have improved with your bow I gave you, oh wait you left it in England and some historian took it to the museum because it is so ancient…..You better get me my bow back you absolute- Nile has been reading over my shoulder this whole time and now I’m going to write some good things about you…

‘How to start? What is good about you, Booker? You reminded me that not everyone is good at something first go, and that they deserve the effort and time you put into them. You ended up being a good shot and it only took you ten years! The others took twice as long. We will have a competition when you return, so keep those archery skills sharp, my friend.’

The next letter was from both Joe and Nicky, and Booker smiled softly to himself. Never to be separated, those two, and he was a fool to think otherwise.

’Nicky does not want to write you a letter, so I will write for both of us. This was Nile’s idea, sending you this little ‘care-package’ as she called it, but do not think this is an olive branch. We are grateful for you, Book, and since you turned up our lives have been somewhat exciting. Our separate and joint experiences in teaching you things has brought us both enjoyable memories, and though somewhat tainted by your actions, upon your return we would like to teach you more new things as we teach Nile. Maybe you might actually improve on your skills for once.

We both love you dearly.’

Booker sniffled and separated the picture enclosed within the letter. It was a capture of when Nicky was teaching him how to cook proper spaghetti bolognese, after he found out that Booker was using jar sauce and packet pasta. Booker remembered getting scolded all night in Italian, and when he told Nicky he understood, the response he got was ”Good. I should hope so."

Nile didn’t write a letter, but she didn’t need to write one. They only knew each other for two weeks before shit hit the fan and Booker was sent away. Instead, in Nile’s envelope was a tiny slip of paper with a phone number on it, along with some fliers for activities to do around Paris.

’Call me anytime, I’m here to chat. Also, don’t mope about for a hundred years, do something! Learn a new skill! (Okay, that might be hard but just do it, maybe bake some sourdough? You love that stuff!)’

Booker took the magnets out of the box, walked over to his fridge and placed them in a circle with a small click!, his heart panging every time.

Bow and arrow, two swords, a labrys, and a handgun with a US flag.

~

AO3 Link

[claudiasjeancregg]

I hope this helps with the stress at least just a little bit <3 and I do understand wanting to write but not being able to, so if you want, write as much as you want with (specially 12!). So. Here we go! 14, 13, 12, 10, 1!

hey ariel thank you so much this literally made my entire day, i wrote a fucking essay so here goes.

1. favorite episode

EVIDENCE OF THINGS NOT SEEN, institutional memory, the supremes, drought conditions, holy night, the inauguration episodes, the midterms, noël... all of them. just. ALL OF THEM

10. something you wish had happened

oh my god SO MANY THINGS!!! cj/toby kissing in the 7.21 scene would have saved my entire soul, or really just a kiss at any point. i just wanted them to ADDRESS THE CHEMISTRY IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?? just confirmation that they dated at one point, or hooked up occasionally... god. ANYTHING! more canon specific, i really wanted a scene of donna in therapy or talking to josh about the ptsd / trauma she undoubtedly faced after gaza. when they F I N A L L Y got together, i wish they had more of a conversation about why she quit! because she HAD GOOD REASON to do it, and i wish had talked about how he had treated her after gaza. also, seeing how cj and toby had dealt with rosslyn, and more conversations about cj getting the COS role over josh and how he forgave her for that. just. MORE FOUND FAMILY CONTENT GODDAMNIT i could watch entire episodes of the senior staff + donna just hanging out, i love them to death. LAST ONE I PROMISE- CJ HAVING FEMALE FRIENDSHIPS. or friendships, period. god, i would have died for some amy + cj content swapping stories and making sarcastic jokes, cj helping amy to adapt to the white house after being in a different environment her whole career. CJ AND ANDY! i mean i ship the ot3 and cjandy to death, but even as friends! donna and cj!! the assistants all being friends! just. let these tired women have friends, that’s all i want.

12. headcanon(s)

yeah, i’ve... basically covered these BUT i always have more!!

first off- BISEXUAL CJ. bi cj!!!! it’s canon in my heart. this next one is less of a headcanon and more of a dream, but the ot3! cj/toby/andy is my favorite thing in the world and i love the three of them.

i think cj and josh were a lot closer than we see, and i have many feelings about them sort of being siblings.

also, hc that cj and toby ended up together after the show BECAUSE I NEED IT.

um, donna went to therapy! i feel like the show largely ignored the fact that she was the only one in the car who survived!! and so did josh, especially after he realized a part of the way he treated her after gaza was bc of his guilt about sending her there in the first place, and then donna almost dying.

okay let’s see... 50% of my brain is thinking of tww headcanons at any given moment so-

huck and molly grow up with auntie cj, who wishes she could be more of a parent but is so, so, so thankful for what she gets. i didn't really think cj wanted to get pregnant and have kids, especially with danny, but the show really threw that in there at the last moment lol. the reason for this is NOT “she’s too focused on her career,” trust me. i actually think cj’s mom died from breast cancer when she was pretty young, about 13. it’s heartbreaking, and miserable, and cj doesn’t smile for a month after. her dad was at a complete loss as to how to help her, since he was still dealing with it too. so for about half a year they co-existed in the same house, barely speaking. cj’s passion for politics and journalism eventually led her to come out of her shell more, about a year later, but she didn’t come back to the joyful person she used to be until college. she’s deathly afraid of passing the cancer gene onto her kids, which is why in my brain, the ot3 always had plans for kids but andy was going to get pregnant. (i talk about cj’s thoughts on actual canon andy’s pregnancy so much in my fic, so i should probably shut up now.) also i really think cj works herself to the bone after becoming COS, especially after toby leaves. he was the only thing keeping her from self-destructing, making her sleep and eat and remember to function. i can’t get over allison janney’s acting, the way you FEEL cj’s exhaustion. she has... no self- preservational instincts when it comes to doing her job as well as she can, and that really hurts her mental health, and like. SANITY. charlie and margaret know this and this duo practically running the white house might be my favorite thing about season 7.  also HOW DID THIS TURN INTO ONLY CJ HEADCANONS i have so many other ones!)

QUEER ELLIE BARTLET how could i forget? my random desire for ellie/mallory has no canon basis but i’m obsessed with them. tbh, i’m obsessed with all f/f west wing ships.

josh definitely has anxiety, that’s kind of canon. donna helps him manage it but after she leaves, his panic attacks become a lot more frequent and he forgets to take care of himself. also, i think cj has anxiety too.

WAIT WAIT WAIT IS THIS A PLACE FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT DONNA AND TOBY?!! aleena has a soapbox and she can’t stop, i’m sorry. okay so donna and toby are my favorite unlikely tww friendship, and i’m going to limit this to a few sentences but i will talk about this whenever anyone gives me an opportunity to. BASICALLY donna is the only person who doesn’t take any of toby’s bullshit, (who isn’t in love with him) and he underestimates her at first, yeah, but he is one of the first people to realize donna’s potential. and they have some very good, very small moments where he really sees her strength and she sees that he’s more than the stubborn grump he pretends to be.

i have so many headcanons about josh and toby, and cj and toby, and josh and donna, and cj and donna, and TOBY AND DONNA. josh teasing toby about cj. toby making fun of donna for being in love with josh because he says she’s too good for him but he loves josh like a brother despite what he says. HE SHOWS HER BABY PICTURES AND SHE GUSHES OVER THEM i don't make the rules!!!! anyways that’s NOT all of my headcanons, i just don't want to make you guys read any more lmao. thank you so much for indulging me, i would be thrilled to talk about more of these or to hear more of your headcanons! (this goes for anyone btw) THAT WAS SO LONG AHH.

13. character you wish you could be / aspire to be

cj cregg

14. on-screen crush

yeah, i’m a simple bisexual. cj cregg.

THAT WAS INSANELY LONG BUT SO FUN FOR ME, THANK YOU!!!

[27emailsicantsend]

I JUST WATCHED THE FINALE AND OH MY GOSH MY HEAD IS SPINNING I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS

I’ll give you my quick thoughts and then jump into Muffy because you already KNOW I am saving a whole section for them

Celia’s growth was amazing. I love that she went from being strict to being so carefree and trusting of Bex

Bex in that wedding dress 👏🏻 Bowie in that Tux 👌🏻 like they didn’t have to do that but they did 😭

The slow dance was SO CUTE OMG

I loved that all of them sang lady Gaga- the song was perfect for them but sad Garren wasn’t on stage with Sofia

However, they showed the ships singing together and whenever they showed Buffy they showed Marty so I was like 😩😭👏🏻 ya know

TJ playing the piano was all I could have asked for

I LOVED the scene when Cyrus and Buffy talked about “relationship woes” like wow. 😭😍 that hurt because the parrallels were so blatantly obvious but Terri made sure to take EQUAL time to explain their woes with each character.

Also WTF KIRA STOP TOUCHING TJ AND PUTTING YOUR ARM ON HIM. This has been my PSA

I LOVED watching TJ just RIP into Kira. Boi 👏🏻 told 👏🏻 her 👏🏻 off. He literally called her out for bullying and asked her to stop (likkkeeee not only was it great bc he was protective boyfriend mode™️ but because he showed growth. He defended Cyrus for something he used to do). It was great and a no Kira redemption was the best way they could have done that and it was was beautiful. 💯

I loved that Jandi scene! I have said I am actually ok with Jandi, but they needed more maturity. Andi needed to find herself and Jonah needed to be ready for a relationship. In time and when Andi can handle conflict, I think they would make a good pairing. But WITH TIME, like they said. Until then, Jonah has the cute bracelet. I think that was such a valuable lesson for kids to not rush something, just because you like someone. Make sure you are actually ready because crushes aren’t all just about endgames (which will sound hypocritical considering what I write next lol) but that they are a LOT of work and you have to have your head on correct to make sure you can handle it. Just *chef’s kiss*

I know Muffy was around this time (sorry my thoughts are so scattered- I am writing this post watching it so not everything is in a congruent timeline) but I am going to come back to them like I said earlier. They have a special reserved™️ section in this post 😍👏🏻

THE B[REDACTED]H SCENE. WAS SO CUTE. UGH

I laughed so hard at TJ’s name but gave all my uwu’s I had left post Muffy (which weren’t many but I reserved some for Tyrus) to that cute little line from Cyrus about how he liked his name 😭

That 👏🏻 hand 👏🏻 hold 👏🏻

Like watching TJ’s shaky fingers get all close I COULDN’T BREATHE-

They really out here making all benches gay huh?

And you could see how SHY TJ was talking to Cyrus. It was so sweet how flirty and awkward he got. I loved it.

I’m sure their hands were v sweaty but that’s a point for another day lol

I thought the scene was handled well considering their limits and tried to keep my expectations low, but TBH I was pretty bummed they didn’t actually say the words that they liked each other. I wish there was more dialogue than vague questions ya know? Oh well 🤷🏼‍♀️

I was also really REALLY hoping for some canon Muffy and Tyrus scenes at the party and kept checking the time stamp during the last scene hoping they would show SOMETHING but they didn’t say anything. Even just a quick “Hey I’m dating this person now and I love them all my uwu’s” would have been fine but it was like that was completely forgotten

However I’ve seen a few Tumblr posts about someone working on making fic text posts with the GHC talking about their canon ships so I’ll take what I can get :)

The Andi Shack and Andi getting into SAVA didn’t surprise me, but it was sweet

I really liked the whole side by side photo thing they did

What did surprise me was Jonah saying he loved Andi 😭 like that was such a sweet sentiment and I was just like, “Alexa play I Cried by Jonah Beck” you know?

Kinda also dissapointed we heard nothing more about Jonah’s panic attack’s, the hole in the wall, and possible Kippen Siblings

REALLY REALLY want an Andi Mack movie- they made a Lizzie McGuire one after only two seasons so they could with AM to address any plot holes (BUT IF THEY DO IT THEY BETTER HAVE CANON MUFFY AND TYRUS JOIN SO HELP ME BC MIRANDA WAS GONE IN TLMM AND I WAS READY TO SHOW HANDS)

Also other side note: I got kinda frustrated with all of the dancing/singing scenes. Like they were cute but also felt like a lot of wasted screen time (much like 3x19 or the Jonah/Cyrus camping scenes) when other plots could have been addressed

And no speaking lines for Amber? At all? Like...? Even with the Jonah stuff? Or redemption paralleling TJ. IDK seemed a lil wack to me

Ok here’s the good stuff

Muffy:

Again, Alexa play “I Cried” by Jonah Beck BECAUSE OH MY GOSH THEY WERE MY EVERYTHING

Surprisingly didn’t cry as much as 3x14 but I think that’s because I was shaking so bad (seriously I looked like I just went through a terrifying haunted house and stayed overnight in it, my hand trembling so much)

I rewatched the scenes WHICH ONLY MADE IT WORSE BECAUSE I CRIED MORE

I enjoyed writing my fics, but really really liked the way Terri handled this

I loved all of their scenes dancing together and it was funny because after Cyrus and Buffy talked, Buffy was like, “he doesn’t like me” but then Marty spent the ENTIRE night like RIGHT NEXT TO BUFFY. Not with the other girl. Literally physical space is not a real thing with them. Watch when they dance, or when they see CeCe in the Dino costume or any other time, Buffy and Marty are ONLY next to each other and Marty even moves closer to Buffy when they are all huddled around CeCe if you watch closely enough

The frog parallel? 😭👌🏻

Buffy addressing Marty instead of the other way around? 😭👌🏻

Marty “what’s going on?” 😭👌🏻

I loved when Marty called himself a dope 😂👏🏻 13/10 sweet boi

Also, watching Buffy get worked up because they can’t have a real conversation I’m 😭😭😭 you could see actual tears in her eyes and THEN GIRL WENT RUNNING OUTSIDE FOR SOME FRESH AIR

AND GUESS WHO CHASES AFTER HER- I’M—- UGHHHHHH I’m getting worked up thinking about it tbh

Marty tries the conversation again and she SAYS SHE LIKES HIM. NO HESItation what kind of ROMANCE—

Heidenjfbdhewiejdkdk

And then it was literal poetic cinema when he said he NEVER STOPPED LIKING HER AFTER THAT AWKWARD PAUSE AND GRABBED HER HANDS

It was so SOft-

And then they KISSED AND IT WAS REAL

I got my Muffy kiss 💅🏻 I just. I. You guys don’t understand. I was shipping this WAY before anyone really got on board. I remember trying to look up Muffy fan videos after two episodes of them together because I already fell in love with them and there was one like barely edited thirty second video on YouTube. I tried to post something on here and like two people liked it. I LIKED THEM WHEN BASICALLY NO ONE ELSE DID AND SO I FEEL LIKE I AM ONE OF THE MOST DESERVING OF THIS SHIP BEING ENDGAME AND NO ONE CAN FIGHT ME ON THIS JUST LET ME LOVE THEM

MUFFY KISS (sorry needed to say it one more time for emphasis)

And then they walked away together with their arms around each other 😭 If you watch closely Buffy kinda tucks her head into his arm and I’ve seen fics of them doing this so it made me heart 💗💓💓 when they actually did

I JUST WANT TO SEE THEM AS A CANON COUPLE IS THAT TO MUCH TO ASK

Please Terri Minksy, I beg of you, if you don’t get a S4 make a movie but it is REQUIRED BY LAW that Muffy and Tyrus are in the ENTIRE movie- being canon and cute. They don’t even need angst but I still want scenes with them together just being in love.

I will be spending the entire next week in complete denial that this show is over, while rewatching this episode ten times and reading every Muffy fic I can find. Thanks for coming to my Tedx talk.

[luckycheesefoodie321]

Excuse me, I was late to the party but I’ve arrived and may I just say... (I wanna say spoiler free but ehhhh...)

Black Panther was absolutely stunning...

{These are just my personal opinions and I can only speak from an MCU view on this whole matter so don’t come at me those with greater comic book knowledge, I am uninitiated in such things, please forgive me etc}

The visuals, the cast, the colour palettes, the dialogue, the acting...

The whole cinematic experience was fantastic, and while a movie from Marvel Studios that is part of the MCU, it can stand solidly on its own without having to try to tie in with the rest of the universe to have value...in fact I’m glad that other than canon characters reprising their roles and talking solely about T’Challa’s rise to King as a result of his father’s death rather than explicitly referencing the events of Civil War is all they did for the duration of the movie. Ofc the necessary end credits did reveal our main tie-in to Infinity War but yeah we’ll get to that monster when it comes out in April (here in Aus at least)...

And speaking of characters, the women in this movie were fucking bomb tom badasses and I appreciate that the special forces for the royal family are all women, and even as a woman of science, Shuri (T’Challa’s sister) still knows how to fight. I may even go so far to say (and I don’t think y’all will disagree too much) that the women- Shuri, Okoye and Nakia, and the whole Dora Milaje outshone the two Black Panthers...

I mean, T’Challa recognising the faults of his country’s way of life was important as he pushes to involve himself in the world (which is important for the MCU), and I absolutely think that N’Jadaka aka Killmonger was a fantastic villain. Not in the way where they’re cruel and clever and evil to be evil (a very different kind of villain). But a fantastic villain in that we saw where he was coming from, why he was doing what he did, and ultimately grounding him and his story in very real world problems. Maybe it’s just another glamourfied movie way of calling out those in power and maybe it won’t make a difference?? But, I think he represented this well through his backstory (which I think was told well through “dream sequences” and flashbacks). And I tell you, there was an audible “woahh” in the movie theatre when Killmonger revealed his own Black Panther suit because that shit was cool! And led to my favourite fight between the Dora Milaje and Killmonger (idk I just really enjoyed it).

And here we return to the women, played by some incredible actresses, were fantastic. And they were literally everywhere. Yeah there was that whole bit with W’Kabi and his band of what seemed to be all-male warriors, and ultimately they had to end on the big fight between the two male leads and their ... I suppose a “redemption” moment?? Imma just call it that for now until I can describe it better. BUT SERIOUSLY THERE WERE WOMEN EVERYWHERE. Not just the token female to look pretty or to have a moment of badassery before ultimately being saved by the male lead.

{I accidentally deleted a whole fucking bit so I’m a bit mad here}

There was equal representation in the tribe leaders, an all female group of warriors and the general was a BAMF annnd (and this is important) had a lover (or husband?? Idk his title isn’t important here). Okoye was a powerful woman in a high position of importance, and I appreciate that she didn’t have to forgo a loving relationship in order to maintain her place or role.

Then there’s Nakia who was the foot into the rest of the world that was trying hard to open the doorway so that Wakanda could help those with its incredible and numerous resources (which obviously would come to impact T’Challa’s thought process throughout the film). And she was not relegated just to love interest, being plenty capable a warrior herself and a spy AND after T’Challa was defeated by Killmonger, she knew what she had to do and did not hesitate to do it, and knew she had to protect the Queen and Princess and to get help even whilst grieving. She stayed true to her beliefs from the very beginning of the movie and would not budge and steadfast characters like that, I appreciate.

And of course I gotta talk about Shuri (who is definitely my favourite just from how fun she is). She’s such a breath of fresh air amidst all the seriousness going on around her and keeps things light, but that could’ve been all she was. She could’ve just been the little sister, but nope. She’s an intelligent, funny and capable women who is still completely involved in the running of Wakanda. And it’s important that she’s young, because she’s still optimistic and continues to push Wakanda to new technological heights but also wanting to improve upon traditions which is also a factor that ultimately influences T’Challa’s thinking in the end. And of course the WHAT ARE THOSE??? moment was fucking priceless. And while she remained primarily a background character, Angela Bassett as Ramonda was friggen regal as hell and those white dread locks were kickass on her. She played her role well, equal parts grieving widow, proud mother and powerful Queen, who is not afraid to kneel before a tribe leader whose people had rejected the kingdom to ask for help - all for the sake of her country and people.

{this whole bit between these little authors notes was rewritten holy crap balls}

And I suppose I gotta talk about Bilbo, our token white guy. Ahh man if ever there was a sentence... nah I loved that, knowledgeable and well-used to giving orders as he was, he still had to play awkward and turn away from all the secret things and rituals going on in Wakanda even though, like a typical government agent of these sorts of movies, tried to interject wherever he could. And then was promptly shut up. Which amused me highly. But I appreciate he got a chance to show that he was more than a lackey of what’s basically the new Shield (that is another authoritative body trying to control the various Avengers).

Andy Serkis was great too, even if his role was just a means to an end for the actual big bad...and I mean how much of his lines were adlib?? I mean surely that singing wasn’t part of the script XD

{more things were accidentally deleted and retyped holy hell I’m posting this now}

Oh and after all that. The comedic timing, injecting humour in just the right ways throughout the film and into the dialogue was really well done. The acting was brilliant, and so organic and richly expressive. The visuals, again, were stunning and there were so much vibrant colour and the clothing department did an outstanding job I feel. All the clothing (at least from my limited knowledge) looked authentic and true to African culture, and while holding true to all that- could still double up as shields or armour- which is a very clever reference back to Klaue’s statement that vibranium is sewn even into their clothing.

Idk what else to say after all this. This is me basically just wanting to write my thoughts down before I forget them and while they’re still fresh, having just seen the movie. Again, all just my opinion. Probably not well phrased but whatever, just some more blah blah about how great Black Panther is, and how much it has me hyped to see him again in Infinity War- which again; monster to deal with later bc inevitably we’ll be jumping around to a whole lot of other people and it’s basically the first Avengers all over again, but Thanos has finally entered the mix. So yeah I’m done now.

[danatole-headcanons]

Ace, Andy, Kena, and Vic’s Danatole Kid Hcs

@melchirits

* THE KIDS * * helo naught xhildern, it’s danatole child time * THE KIDS: Fyodor(Theo) and Lucette (Lucy) Dolokhov-Kuragin * Dickle * every close friend/relative gets One Name to suggest * all of them are really good and considerate…………..until they go to balaga, a family friend * they tell balaga that he has One Chance……. And the name he choses is dickle * “ok balaga you have one shot at this, don’t fuck it up” * “ok ok hear me out. dickle.” * anatole is dying * dolokhov is having a heart attack in the background, im fucking wheeding * “ok but give me at least three chances” * “hear me out: succulent butterfly or FUCKING NUTMOBILE” “why’d you scream the second one?” “Because it should be in all caps” “get the fuck out” * “you had one chance, WE’RE NOT NAMING OUR GOTDAM SON DICKLE” * “but can the middle names spell dickle, what about troika” * “balaga please get out of our house it’s midnight” * “how about pikachu. Or ash ketchum.” * fedya, screaming from the background, heart attack paused: “YES” “i think i thought of the perfect name” balaga literally gets to anatole’s height by climbing him and whispers, “the loud THX noise from that one movie.”[a] * “name the child the THX noise” “balaga,,,,its been four days please leave” * he Won’t give up * Other balaga recommendations: * FUCKING NUTMOBILE * lucas steele, and variants * paul pinto * razor boy * succulent * marvin * paul pinto in khakis * lucifer * succulent butterfly * lampost * trash can * naruto * pikachu * ash ketchum * kukas steeke * THX noise * fursuit * (anatole kicks him out after that one) * ALSO * “fedya you are the father” * “so are you” * “oh shit true” * the first child (theo) grows up and learns that they were literally almost named fucking nutmobile and is ready to deck both balaga and their dads * balaga is like “im gonna teach your kid how to drive” * anatole astral projects while Everyone it holding fedya back from destroying balaga * balaga teaches the kid how to drive anyway bc fedya and anatole can’t stop him * so the kid gets pulled over by a cop the first time they drive (w/balaga) bc of course * the police person is just like “I KNOW YOU” and balaga screams “FLOOR IT” * “green means go, red also means go probably, yellow means speed up” * “balaga why is my kid crying” “,,,,,,,,,,reasons” * balaga calls theo dickle forever bc he can * Lucy has Fedya’s Determination and she does everything balaga does better * balaga cries into a wine bottle on the pavement * “balaga eating saltines and chugging wine on the sidewalk”~Quote from Ace * one time balaga takes lucy out for night lessons * fedya wakes up as this is happening and has a panic attack because “where is our kid oh dear god” * he literally sprints out into the driveway and balaga screams “FUCKING FLOOR IT” and lucy’s doing all sorts of pro maneuvers * while balaga ends up hanging on for dear life because “oh so this is what it’s like to be my passenger” * “lucy lucifer” * balaga has a corkboard full of parking tickets he never paid, he hoards them like trophies * (balaga voice) speed limit 420 haha nice

* “Balaga that says 42,,,” * “if i put four engines in my car,,,” * balaga owns a school bus that’s decked out like a monster truck * balaga works for uber AND lyft, like a double agent * one time he gets an uber and lyft at the same time so hes like fuck it and gets them both * fuzzy dice on rearview mirror * balaga’s car is named nutmobile & it has a nut sticker * balaga sleeps in his car in a walmart parking lot at night?? * on lucy’s first birthday balaga teaches lucy how to say fuck and fedya decks him in the street * balaga picks lucy up from school or something one day and he saw her and just yelled “HEY LUCIFER” * lucy whips around like YEAH FUCKASS WHAT DO YOU WANT, she was like 14 * BALAGA IS LITERALLY AT ANATOLE AND FEDYAS HOUSE ALK THE TINE AND HE IS JUST YELLING LUCIFER ALL GHE TIME AND FEDYA ID LIKE SHUT THE FUCK UP BALAGA * balaga runs like naruto * balaga was the babysitter literally all the time * balaga worked as a gym teacher for a month before getting fired * (“what’d he get fired for?” “nothing you can prove”) ~Andy and Ace * someone else parks in his parking spot and he just keys the car * balaga worked as a librarian for two hours before being fired for telling the kids to shut the fuck up * balaga never gets fired from uber no matter what * Review: 5/5. Almost died but i got to my destination, 30 minutes away, in 2 minutes. * “LUCY, HYPERDRIVE” * balaga has completely taken over anatole & fedya’s garage * they try to walk in one time like “is this is fucking dead rat” and he shoots them with a paintball gun and says “no this is covfefe” * Balaga goes as a gc egg shaker for halloween w the kids * “No you just hear the beads and then theres tiny egg man” ~Kalvin * “yeah the guy who lives in our garage uhhhh tiny egg man” ~Theo * lucy draws balaga and he says “hell yeah fanart,” hangs it up on like the ceiling of his car * when lucy and theo play mario kart she always chooses rainbow road * chooses monopoly for Family Game Night * “lucy please we’ve been playing for three days” “no it’s blond dad’s turn” * anatole’s dying on the floor, fedya’s crying, theo’s dissociating * theo’s a hide and seek master

*They watch Buzzfeed Unsolved * lucy & theo go ghost hunting, lucy’s humming the ghostbusters theme and theo’s shaking like a leaf in the corner with ten vials of holy water on him * “hey demons it’s me, ya boi” “LUCY NO” * “COME AT ME DEMONS!” “L U C Y P L E A S E” * Theo is Dipper Pines * lucy is always ready to Deck People (kalvin style) * lucy has a pokeball in her backpack to throw at people she doesnt like * the guys at school call her “hellraiser” and the girls call her “lucifer” * theo and lucy are Not Straight in the slightest * lucy is pan, theo is gay & ace, & also trans * lucy makes so many innuendos she got detention multiple times because of it * theo can play literally any instrument and spent his money on bookfairs in elementary school * Theo knows that anybody who plays violin is a basic bitch so he plays viola instead * “Fyodor jr.!” “Sorry dad, you’re basic.” ~Convo with Anatole * theo quickly become better at gambling than fedya, it switches from fedya letting him win to him actually getting demolished, fedya cries * lucy does the thing where it looks like you’re doing ballet but then you go over to someone and kick them in the face * lucy literally carries around a bag of glitter to throw on people when they say/do something stupid * lucy’s ringtone is the THX noise and it’s always so fucking loud * ippolit kuragin is the cool uncle but also cryptid * is a fashion designer in NY apparently * unrelated: (dolokhov voice) me me big anxiety * theo stans all the murder musicals * also is totally straight for phillipa soo * also stans all things LMM * lucy’s contact pick for Blond Dad is That anatole pic * lucy is team valor and theo is team instinct * fedya’s valor, anatole’s mystic (prettiest logo???), balaga’s instinct * everyone outs poor anatole for being on team mystic * “so uh anatole what team did you pick?” “mystic” “oh because they’re smart and stuff–” “no, they’re the most aesthetic * the kids are highkey competitive about pokemon * anatole does that thing where he does 600000 soft restarts to get a shiny starter * he REALLY LOVES alolan vulpix!! * lucy has an embarrassing collection of photos of anatole * Balaga insists on giving the kids The Talk * theo didn’t talk for a week after but it could have gone much worse * someone: so how’d It Go? * theo, shaking, looking up with the purest fear in his eyes: it could have been worse * balaga teaches theo to curse * also, someone @ theo : “fuck, i mean shoot! im so sorry!!” theo, drinking a glass of vodka: what the fuck you can swear around me i literally fuckimg 21 years old what the shit * theo, quietly: in the heights is better than hamilton * lucy, a floor down: EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME * once lucy asked balaga “hey do you sell drugs” * and balaga was like “no why, do you need them? bc i can get you them” * everyone sees theo as the calm kid, but if you talk shit about his family he Will duel you in a denny’s parking lot @ 3am hamilton style * there’s always the option to go live in the garaga with balaga * Theo’s secret dating the Andreirretasha kid, Nico(lai) * They are the cutest couple™ * Okay some Mama Helene™ bs * Helene was the mom, Fedya was the dad * “Helene and Dolokhov arm-in-arm,” * Lucy looks like a mini Helene, Theo looks like a mini Fedya * The only difference between Helene and Lucy is while Helene has the green-hairpiece-thing, Lucy wears a mauve bow * On Lucy’s fourteenth bday, Helene bent down to eye-level, look soulfully into her eyes, and said this: * “Lucy, as my daughter, i feel as if you should have this..” * It’s a necklace that says “Bitch” * Lucy was 13 when she started her drunk text collection * On Lucy’s 16 bday, helene gave her her most prized possession * “Lucy, I want you to have this, I was going to give it to you later in life, but you’ve come so far already..” * She pulls out a book from her purse, written in fancy calligraphy on it are the words “Burn Book” * “Lucy this is everything that someone i know has done wrong, treat it with care…” * It was one of the only times lucy has ever cried * You bet your ass there’s an entire section dedicated to Anatole * “Anatole, age 1-6, Anatole, Age 7-10, Anatole, Age 11-13, Anatole, Age 14-18, etc” * Theres even some stuff about Cryptid-Uncle-Ippolit * “Hey dad? Remember when you and uncle Pierre tied to guy to a bear for shits and giggles?” * Theo is on the spectrum * Helene got him a fidget cube * He and Lucy do sibling costumes * Theo is a gangly mess of limbs like how does the kid function * Theo was cis-passing when he started dating Nico * When he told him he was trans, Nico just shrugged and kissed him alot * Yeah so I love these kids and might write a fic