#bastard child characters are so fun to analyze

[koulakoukoula2003]

controversial opinions: erwin would prefer modern/contemporary art museums because he'd find the art more interesting to analyze and read about, erwin is a bit of a bastard man, erwin actually has a good sense of humor (bit cheeky even, in a casual and subdued way) + he does appreciate good banter with people he trusts, although he values traditions and customs erwin isn't as traditionalistic as people think, erwin isn't necessarily scholarly by nature, "erwin never cries or gets emotional" ???

Finally someone's not asking for smut LMAO

Erwin would prefer modern/contemporary art museums:

At first, I was like nah I don't think so but when I actually considered it, I think you're right??? This man likes puzzles and he likes putting his brilliant brain to use to let everyone around him know that he's smart af so maybe, just maybe, he does prefer modern art but he's also appreciating the older, classic, renaissance whatever it's called, art.

Erwin is a bit of a bastard:

That he is LMAO especially canon!Erwin. If you think canon!Erwin will ever love you, you are a total idiot LMAOOO this man will only use you if you have something to offer and he WILL be feeling bad about it but he still won't stop cuz you're actually pretty helpful with something (fighting titans or being very brilliant strategically or whatever). This man doesn't know how to do this weird thing called feelings.

I know y'all are deprived of the perfect man and you imagine that Erwin IS the perfect man y'all need, but let's be honest with ourselves, he's anything but perfect. He's a manipulative son of a bitch who's going to use up everything you have to offer and you won't even be mad about it.

Erwin has a good, cheeky sense of humour:

On that, I will disagree, Erwin has a terrible sense of humour when all he's making is dad jokes that only he laughs at AHAHAHA ERWIN HAS BOOMER humour ok? this man has no idea how to have fun, all he's focused on is his work and his duties and whatever boring thing you can think about. He doesn't make jokes, but when he does, only he and Miche laugh istg but he DOES appreciate good banter with people he trusts I AGREE on that.

A joke that Erwin would say: "I have a joke about vegetables... but it's corny."

queue crickets chirping in the background

Athough he values traditions and customs, Erwin isn't as traditionalistic as people think:

It's me, I'm people AHAHAH I do think that Erwin is a traditional man and LET'S BE REAL and consider that all canon events take place in a WWII kind of era, so if we really want to be canon, consider that he's a military commander in the 1940s-1950s. What we call now traditional was modern for them back then lmaooo and because I have a smalllll fixation with those decades (cuz I've been writing an original book with an erwinlike character that takes place in the 50s) a military man in WWII who used to fight nazis for breakfast would be a man that we would totally call traditional today.

Traditional meaning that he'll be the one to provide for you, he'll work day and night, he'll be bringing you flowers and chocolate boxes whenever you're having an anniversary. He's a soft dom (or rough if you ask him to lmao) BASICALLY he's 100% a dom, TO SUM IT UP he is everything your grandpa/great-grandpa was in his prime I guess.

BUT if we're talking about modern AU erwin, then yes, I will agree. Modern!AU Erwin is not as traditionalistic as most would think he is. Such traits and mindsets are vastly dependent on where and when someone was born ofc.

Erwin isn't necessarily scholarly by nature:

If his father wasn't killed by the government when he was just a child, he wouldn't have thrown himself in books and conspiracy theories and historical books. IF Erwin's dad never died and he had grown up normally, he probably wouldn't have joined the army at all???? Im not sure, just saying that his father's death had a huge impact on his life and his decisions.

But I DO think that he's a bookworm??? In every scene we have of him in snk he's in his office surrounded by hundreds of books LMAO if that ain't a nerd right there, idek what is. I BET in modern AU he'd be wearing glasses too.

LET'S BE HONEST a man who reads and studies and is literally buried in books IS HOT. I DON'T WANT MY MAN DUMB and Erwin certainly isn't

Erwin never cries or gets emotional:

NOT in front of others. And even when he does breakdown, it's very, very, VERY rare. He does have the 'im a big strong man and big strong men are not allowed to cry' ego. He IS harsh on himself but most of the time he's trying to ignore all the burdens and guilt and regret that befalls him that eventually pile up and he's breaking down and crying, but EVEN THAT is silent and quiet.

I imagine him TOTALLY ALONE with his back against one of his many bookcases, seated on the floor, messy hair, wrinkly shirt, unshaved face, a total mess, crying silently cuz every time he closes his eyes all he sees are friends that he's the one who's sent them to their deaths.

Listen, canon!Erwin suffers probably more than most characters in snk (actually no everybody suffers in snk but you know what I mean ok?) he does act like the big strong commander with a resolve of steel BUT HE IS HUMAN and he DOES breakdown however silent it is.

There's lots of shit that comes with the position he has. No one could have ever dealt with all of this better than him, but he still breaks in the late hours of the night when no one is there to visit him and see him in a state that he doesn't want anyone to see him in.

And that's why hoes like me write fanfiction uwu

[francisnyx]

I am foaming at the mouth desperately, at a loss for whatever the fuck is going on with Childe. What a difficult bastard, he's confusing as hell, trying to analyze him feels like I'm simultaneously looking in a kaleidescope in a fun houses mirror in five different dimension at once.

He so full of shit. It's bullshit. I am both fascinate and annoyed as hell. Thinking about him made my head hurts. What is he? An eldritch horror beyond comprehension??? It would be easier to accept him as that but NOOO. The little shit decides to be special and somehow somehow manage to be both understandable and not, just barely hovering between the line of it, absolutely laughing at me like the piece of shit that he is.

I am frustated, I am thrilled. I hate him. I love him. He is full of contradiction, a walking disasters, chaos incarnated himself. He charms me and he probably isn't even trying. I'm so mad.

Look at me, being so frickin angry over a fictional character in a gacha games, banging my head on the wall trying to make sense of him.

Only him would made me this infuriated, not even Dazai or Mephisto could. Only Childe.

[thermodynamic-comedian]

I’m screaming and rolling on the ground about nihil being pressured to have kids thing cuz like “YES, YOU GET IT”. My man had probably kids before he was going through his rockstar high (they pressured him to have at least one kid very quickly so they wouldn’t have to deal with a ‘no heir’ situation again) so by the time he did and was done his kids were probably in their tweens to early adulthood (I like to think primo isn’t actually much older then his brothers he just acts very old for his age lol) and since nihil wasn’t there/was a very bad and absent father for their childhood and so now he doesn’t know how to interact with them and they want nothing to do with him.

He loves his kids but he doesn’t know how to approach them at all and it makes him bitter as all hell towards everyone because he just sees so much of himself in his boys (especially Terzo) and wishes he could’ve been better or his sons would allow him to try and be a father. The only person he would feel comfortable enough consulting is probably sister but she’s gone and doesn’t want to get close to him so he doesn’t think they might get back together.

We only see a glimpse into the lives of sister and nihil and it annoys me when everyone seems to make them both villains because it’s more compelling to me when they’re good and kind people who do bad things or are morally ambiguous people who do what is needed even if it hurts them. That’s not to say I don’t think sister didn’t manipulate nihil at least a little bit to convince him to kill his sons but I think sister did that because in her mind she was putting their son in the spotlight like he should’ve been instead of some cardinal people looks down on.

Ahhfjebhsshd it’s just the angst for nihil coming to terms with what he agreed to and that he killed his little boys and can’t bring them back even if they didn’t like him and him waking up and crying in his bed because he has no one to grieve with and sister doesn’t really care all too much because her darling cardinal is on the throne now and he can’t understand why she doesn’t care about these people she’s assisted for years while they took over the papacy and watched them grow up for the most part and made sure they didn’t get themselves killed (she is grieving in her own way but saw it as a necessary evil). I also think Sestorrrr does still love nihil and that’s why she prioritized copia over the boys so much more because she saw him as a product of their love and not something church mandated and they would’ve been a happy family if he didn’t cheat on her. I also think she raised him as an adopted orphan because if he was raised as a child of the bloodline she would’ve been subjected to much more pressure to preform and would not be allowed to relax and truly be a child as much as other kids in the abby

sorry for going on a rant but these two evil bastards are so much fun to talk about when they’re morally grey and conflicted. I don’t hate when people make them purely evil (because hey, conflict in a story is nice) but there’s just so much to explore with these people ya know.

YES EXACTLY!!!!! ANON WE ARE SHAKING HANDS.

im so glad im not the only one really into psycho-analyzing these two freaks specifically, so many of my era 0 fics are just character studies on them-

and the absolute angst potential of nihil being forced to have kids destroys me. like. yeah no shit, of course he's gonna feel conflicted about those kids!! he didn't want to have them!! to him, they're a direct representation of the power the clergy has over his entire life!!!!! his life is not his own, and his family is not his own.

[hallowgracie]

Gender-Flipping the Usual Pirate OC: Ventus Hawkins

In my sky-pirate high fantasy novel, To Sail on Seas of Sky, I decided early on that I would write a quartet for the main set of young adult characters (and it became a quintet, oops) and I wanted to keep the gender ratio fairly even. I took inspiration too from JRPG trios and decided we had to have one more broody pirate boy for the crew.

Now, when I create characters, I'm basically taking disparate inspirations and mashing them together to get something new. I like looking for new inspirations to take character archetypes, and I do so by analyzing what works for me in other media.

For instance, in the Final Fantasy VII remake, I like how Cloud Strife is so broody to the point of comical social awkwardness--which is a trait I decided to steal for Ventus.

Furthermore, I decided to take the trope of a bastard son (a slowly recurring theme in the backstories of the main cast) and of the Pirate King and a Mermaid's child--and Ventus was born. Now that latter trope is usually a female character, I find. But I was intrigued by the challenge of gender-flipping it, with a male character who takes on the alignment of these female traits. This is what I ended up with.

Ventus is the illegitimate son of Captain Marius Hawkins, known currently as the Pirate King in the vein of Morgan or Blackbeard in our world. Like Sir Francis Drake or Captain Kidd, Hawkins came from an upper-class lifestyle and has a well-to-do family in a wealthy port city, with a wife and children. Hence why he does not legally acknowledge Ventus.

Still, he looks after the child in his own way. Ventus uses his father's surname and has been raised under the Grand Fleet, but never on his father's ship. Instead, he's been passed around from ship to ship in the fleet, as he's been considered bad luck. Unaware of his abilities as a siren's son, he has been summoning storms for most of his life unknowingly. No one dares boot him from the fleet entirely for facing the Pirate King's wrath--but no one hangs onto him for long either.

Ventus as a result is very brooding and socially-awkward. But he has a good heart, and is the one who breaks Elodie out from being captured on a Grand Fleet ship in hopes of drawing out Keira Fleetwood. He has a great many skills, including those as a map-maker and navigator. He has an innate gift for direction at sea and other non-violent sea-faring skills (as well as sword-usage and being a decent shot with a pistol).

I definitely intend to do more with Ventus's background, as his father is a major antagonist and the sirens have been fun the characterize. I intend to keep that mermaid theme strong with him, and see where he goes as a character.

[alexiethymia]

A Case Study on Vanitas’ Character: On Vanitas’ Two Conditions

Since they’re animating the What is Love? episode next (episode 7), I couldn’t help but want to talk about that chapter. [spoilers for anime-only watchers!]

Vanitas has two conditions for Jeanne: 

1) She mustn’t drink blood from anyone else but him.

I admit that like Jeanne, it’s easy for me to fall into the trap of thinking Vanitas is a better guy than he is because of certain biases. Let’s admit it, this part was plain blackmail, and yet for some reason, with what we know of Vanitas now, there are also different ways of seeing this scene. 

Vanitas is ‘blackmailing’ Jeanne, but at the same time that blackmail is actually him also offering a solution to Jeanne’s problem. AND YET, HE DOES IT IN SUCH A WAY SO THAT JEANNE NEVER HAS TO FEEL LIKE SHE OWES HIM. More to the point, he does it in such a way to ensure that Jeanne continues hating him. In other words he, in his own twisted way, is doing a nice thing for Jeanne, while ensuring that she never likes him for it. Now I’m not saying it’s a purely altruistic thing, but I still think that Vanitas is drawn to Jeanne because she reminds him of himself back then. If so he knows precisely how to get her to receive help albeit through manipulative means. 

It’s not a purely altruistic thing. He states it so himself, what he gets out of it is the ‘divine feeling’ Jeanne sucking his blood gives to him again purposefully painting himself as a pervert so that Jeanne wouldn’t like him for helping her. But if we are to believe some theories that it’s not actually as enjoyable as he himself paints it out to be (I digress, but I think he’s being honest here. He strikes me as having a bit of a masochistic streak in him) (I digress from my digression, but theory time, what’s his bases of comparison?? Who besides Luna and Jeanne have drunk from him??), then there’s another dimension to his condition of ‘you must drink blood, only from me’. If he’s just in this for the feeling it gives him, then why word the condition that way? He’s never stricken me as possessive of Jeanne despite his words of ‘I want to possess all of you’, and as he’s stated, he doesn’t want Jeanne to love him back. I think this is just another case of his ‘use me’ mindset rearing its head again. He’s said it to Count Orlock, and we know that it started since his time with Dr. Moreau. It is definitely, definitely, unhealthy, and I believe it’s also coupled with his slight suicidal tendencies. If worst comes to worst and Jeanne ends up going out of control and killing him, he seems not to care. 

Going off tangent here, but another one of his contradictions is how ruthless he is at surviving and yet how careless he is with his life, especially when it comes to people caring for him. He’d rather be left in the snow than have Jeanne take care of him as repayment for him protecting her, or when he got angry at Noe for protecting him from Ruthven.

But at his core and as Luna stated, Vanitas is a kind child. It’s developed in an unhealthy way, but he’s quite self-sacrificial. It’s fine for Jeanne to use him so that Jeanne has a focus or outlet. At least when the craving for blood gets to be too much, Jeanne knows there’s someone she can drink from, which helps her so that she doesn’t lose control and lash out against Luca for example. And on Vanitas’ side, it seems like it’s fine for him to be put at risk so other people don’t have to be, and on Jeanne’s part too, it also helps her from further hating herself if she ends up hurting other people. 

In other words, his condition is both a selfish and selfless one, yet he paints it to be blackmail. It’s not an entirely good thing for him to do, because there’s definitely power play involved, but it’s also not as scummy as it is initially presented out to be with what we now know of his past. 

2) For Jeanne to call him by ‘name’. 

There are so many things going on here that I just can’t help but ramble about it. Firstly, I’m really interested in how this’ll be translated in the anime. Did Vanitas say call me by ‘Vanitas’, or call me by ‘my name’? Because if it’s the latter, then couldn’t Vanitas also mean (although not fully consciously) that he wants someone to call him by his true name like Luna did before he inherited the name ‘Vanitas’? (And I will just die if in a future chapter, Jeanne and Noe do end up getting to call him by his original name).  

Second, there are slight parallels and contrasts with this arrangement he has with Jeanne and with the one he had back then with Moreau. Obviously Moreau is trash and took full advantage of ‘No. 69′. He exercised all the power. In this case, Jeanne is hesitant about hurting Vanitas despite how aggravating he is towards her. She doesn’t want to drink his blood at all. Moreau was a human. Jeanne is a vampire, and despite physically being superior towards Vanitas she changes her demand into a plea or request for Vanitas to keep her secret. (And whelp that’s when she sealed her fate, because she apparently triggered Vanitas. Don’t worry though Jeanne, you’ll get your payback soon enough). Vanitas was completely without power before, so faced with a similar situation this time around, I think part of him let the power get to his head, causing him to partly take advantage of Jeanne (he’s a complete sadist AND a masochist). He has complete agency this time around. Sure he’s once again offering himself with the expectation of pain and at the risk of his life, and he’s also doing this for another person, like with Misha, but unlike with Dr. Moreau, the power is on his side this time around. 

Going off tangent, that’s one thing that Vanitas and Jeanne have to work on. Balancing power and agency. I get where Vanitas is coming from, surrounded by vampires as he is, and with his past too, but he has to realize that caring about and loving someone isn’t a matter of power. You don’t lose when you love and care. You don’t surrender power. You don’t have to take away someone’s agency or exercise your own power for you to manage to do good things for the people you care about. He has to manage that balance - likewise with Jeanne, Noe, and Domi as well. 

Going back. Since he has full agency in this case, it’s his decision to offer himself to Jeanne in this way, he doesn’t want to be dehumanized while doing so. He’s had enough trauma about that already. Despite how he words it, it’s actually a somewhat equivalent exchange between Vanitas and Jeanne. He offers her blood as a way for her to keep her sanity, but she can’t be removed from it, she has to look at him properly and consider him a person with full agency and choices, and not just as ‘that human’. 

And looking at their faces - Jeanne’s is an incredulous one as if to say, ‘that’s it?’ It’s both an easy and difficult thing for her to do. Meanwhile, for Vanitas, I’d expected him to look goading, but he just looks patient and soft. At least in this instance, I don’t see it as him forcing Jeanne to do something she doesn’t want to do - just an unexpected moment of wanting to be known and treated as himself. 

LISTEN HE IS FULL OF CONTRADICTIONS OK. We’re led to believe that all of his interactions with Jeanne until the moment he realized he fell in love with her was just him teasing her, but I believe he was already in the process of falling in love with her slowly. I’ll go so far as to say that he was the one who fell in love first, but he just interpreted it as his being ‘excited’ by her. In other words, the words he said (’I love you’) which we thought was a lie was actually the truth, albeit a truth he didn’t realize much later. 

Why do I think so? It’s because he revealed certain moments of vulnerability or sincerity with her or about her without any of the teasing, as represented by the italicized dialogue. It’s the same case for when he said he didn’t want to trod on her foot with Noe, or when he happily grinned and he said forthright Jeanne was the side of her he liked best (or when he promised he’d kill her). 

This is just an example of his contradiction. He never wanted or expected Jeanne to fall in love with him, and sure this could just be his wanting to push boundaries or test limits, being the chaotic person that he is, and yet, wanting to be called by name is a desire to form a genuine connection. 

He could have just remained as ‘that human’ to Jeanne while interacting with her. After all, what could stop him? He also had the first condition in place to make sure they’d continue to interact. And yet, he refused (like how Noe refuses to be ‘that vampire’ to him). 

Like Luna said, as long as he didn’t close his heart, he wouldn’t be alone. Even if Vanitas thinks it burdensome or wants to be ‘free’, it seems that he still does long for connection - romantic, platonic, or otherwise. 

And this is why I ship them, even in this instance so early on in the manga when arguably the dynamic wasn’t at its healthiest. It’s because of their background that draws them to each other and allows them an understanding of one another. It’s because of that desire to know more about each other. It’s because of that genuine care and wanting to form a connection with each other, despite part of them rejecting it because of their issues.

Do I think they’re good for each other? Yes. Admittedly, they have so much to work on, but I believe that they push (Vanitas with regards to Jeanne’s blood addiction, and Jeanne with Vanitas in his moment of vulnerability) because the both of them tend to be self-destructive if left to their own devices. It’s just that their version of care for each other is aggressive. They’ll have to find that balance though eventually. On Vanitas’ part he also has to be inspired by Noe that the kind of salvation a person wants may not be the best possible outcome, especially for those left behind. I’m not sure what Mochizuki sensei’s end message is suppose to be, but death I don’t believe is salvation.   

tldr: Vanitas is a self-sacrificial idiot who longs for connections under layers of self-loathing (but he’s still an asshole), and VaniJeanne is a good ship which had the foundations laid down from the beginning. 

[causticbicaudate]

really loved your psychonauts drawings, loboto is my underrated nightmare child and i wanna be his friend

also, what's fragment? is it a comic or a story, or is it just the doodles you have?

Loboto is a chaotic bastard man dentist but he deserves so much better and I have SO many feelings about him.

And then Raz is so smol but he’s got a heart bigger than his already gargantuan head and he just wants to help people and he’s so good. ;__; Fragment is just a concept/story idea that spawned from my crazy little brain spring-boarding directly off of the events leading up from the first PN game, though RoR, and through the conclusion of PN2. It’s not an AU because the canon lore is entirely left alone and I’m just using everything we already know from the series and building on that. The story centralizes around Raz and Loboto unwittingly exploring their parallels, airing out old wounds, and setting Loboto on the path for actual healing. And also so Loboto can finally make a real friend for once. Which also, by extension, means that Raz can also make a real friend for once.

Lord knows that little boy is lonely enough from having to deal with never staying in one place for long and also having to dodge his family on the whole psychic business for most of his life thus far. He puts up with a lot of shit seemingly in hopes that he can forge good relationships with others even if he’s very frequently treated like dirt. And, considering how RoR went with rummaging around in Loboto’s head and making him relive his earliest and most traumatizing repressed memories, there’s a lot to extrapolate on and boy do I love picking things apart and analyzing them. The character evolution is my favorite part of it all, though. I’ve got a bunch of concept art sketches/renders that I’m still churning out little by little as I slowly explore some of the world building and ideas I have, I’ve drawn several related minicomics, and I also fully intend on making a feature-length, multi-chapter fic for it, too, so everyone can suffer and cheer with me if they choose. It’s just a fun little project where I can inflict massive amounts of torment damage on myself and my friends and whoever else is unfortunate enough to look at my eye crimes. C:

[astradrifting]

GRRM really created so many parallels and foreshadow using the DoD characters that honestly we could just figure the asoiaf ending by analyzing it. My favorite is the Aegon III-D@ny parallels, the fact that one of his closest allies was a face-scarred Master of coin Lannister who ended as Hand to Bran' parallel character just make it so obvious its funny.

Oh my god I didn’t even realise Tyland Lannister was initially on the greens’ side! I’m not super fond of Tyrion ending up as Hand, but you’re right that it’s so obviously meant to reference him. There’s so many parallels that it’s a little crazy. I don’t want to say that the second Dance will end exactly as the first did, it’d be a little too neat if history repeated entirely, but you can see so many echoes of it even in the show’s bastardised ending.

“The broken, shattered realm suffered for a while yet, but the Dance of the Dragons was done. Now what awaited the realm was the False Dawn, the Hour of the Wolf, the rule of the regents, and the Broken King.”

(TWOIAF, Aegon II)

I’m not sure what the False Dawn is going to parallel to, it refers to the period of time after Aegon II’s death but before Lord Stark got to King’s Landing, when people thought that peace had finally come. It kind of brings to mind the War for the Dawn, though personally I think that the threat of the Others will be resolved before the Dance is over. The Hour of the Wolf is obviously about House Stark’s rise back to power, and the Broken King is Bran - though if he actually becomes known as Bran the Broken I might end up committing violence ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. 

The parts about Lord Corlys Velaryon are why I’m so hopeful that Jon’s book ending will be completely different from the show’s. He’s arrested for Aegon II’s death by Cregan Stark, even though Cregan had previously declared for Rhaenyra, because as TWOIAF puts it, “to kill a cruel and unjust king in lawful battle was one thing. But foul murder, and the use of poison, was a betrayal against the very gods who had anointed him.”

Corlys didn’t deny his guilt, and expressed no regret. “What I did, I did for the good of the realm. I would do the same again. The madness had to end.”

Cregan Stark declared him to be guilty of murder, regicide, and high treason, and he was sentenced to execution. But many spoke in his defence, even people who had fought against him in the Dance. Baela and Rhaena Targaryen, Corlys’ granddaughters and Aegon III’s half-sisters, convinced Aegon to issue an edict pardoning Lord Velaryon, which Alysanne Blackwood then convinced Cregan to let stand. Lord Velaryon was pardoned and even restored to his offices and honours, made one of the king’s regents and given a place on the small council.

Corlys’ words definitely could be Jon’s as well, a much more in-character declaration post-D@ny’s death than the drivel GoT tried to feed us. I was worried for a bit that this would be how Tyrion is let off scot-free, but Baela and Rhaena, who were vital to his release, are such obvious Arya and Sansa stand-ins, and they’re certainly not going to expend any effort in helping Tyrion. So Corlys’ circumstances more likely lays the groundwork for how Jon will be freed and remain in political power, while Tyland frankly inexplicably becoming Aegon III’s Hand after he was in favour of brutally killing him parallels Tyrion managing to fail up, as a way of reconciling the old regime with the new one.

This makes Tyrion becoming Hand more palatable IMO. Either Jon and Tyrion both should have been punished or neither should have been punished, not the travesty where Tyrion gets everything he’s ever wanted while Jon is exiled to a Watch with no purpose and a Wall that’s already half-collapsed, so what exactly can it protect against? I suppose they were afraid of seemingly rewarding Jon for killing d@ny, especially if pol!Jon had been revealed, but most people noticed how nonsensical his ending was, and it just led to ‘Bloodraven/Bran is the real villain’ takes anyway.

(Side note: Asha/Yara basically still being loyal to D at the end annoys me so much, and made no sense. Jon did more to help save her by giving Theon that pep talk than D@ny did. Maybe it was a leftover from her taking Victarion’s role in the story, but in no reasonable world is anyone going to listen to the Ironborn who brought the Fire threat over in the first place.)

Of course Tyland Lannister isn’t actually Hand for long, given that he dies barely two years later from Winter Fever, feared and hated, alone except for a maester and King Aegon. It might be an indication that Tyrion will face a similar fate, that he’ll die after he’s seemingly won, exactly what he threatened Cersei with:

“A day will come when you think yourself safe and happy, and suddenly your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth, and you'll know the debt is paid."

(ACOK, Tyrion XII)

So that I can stop talking about Tyrion, here’s some facts about Rhaena and Baela that are obviously meant to reference Sansa and Arya, so much so that it feels a little bit like GRRM is winking and going “See what I did there? Huh? Huh? Did you see??”:

- their descriptions: “Rhaena was slender and graceful; Baela was lean and quick; Rhaena loved to dance; Baela lived to ride...” + “Baela was wild and willful”, “more boyish than ladylike”, and kept her hair cropped short as a boy’s

- Rhaena spent most of the Dance in the Vale, where she lived in relative comfort as the ward of Lady Jeyne Arryn. Baela was a dragonrider and so moved between Dragonstone and Driftmark, but was captured on Dragonstone when Aegon II descended upon it

- Rhaena was favoured to be queen after her brother, considered more qualified than her wild sister

- Baela liked to spend time with “unsuitable companions” she would bring to the Red Keep - including a comely juggler, a blacksmith’s apprentice whose muscles she admired (!!!), a legless beggar, a pair of twin girls from a brothel, an entire troupe of mummers once

- After her brother’s regents tried to marry her to a lord 40 years older than her, Baela escaped the Red Keep by climbing out of a window, trading clothes with a washerwoman, then walking right out of the front gate. She ran away to Driftmark and married her supposed cousin (though more likely he was her half-uncle), the legitimised bastard Alyn Velaryon, which might have had me worried about j0nrya if Alyn weren’t best known for being a daring sailor who went on many voyages, including sailing the Sunset Sea, until he was finally lost at sea during Aegon IV’s reign. Alyn’s mother was also called Mouse, for being “small, quick, and always underfoot.”

- another fun fact about Alyn: he’s a bad haggler, and had to agree to a high ransom and many concessions in order to get Prince Viserys returned to Westeros. This automatically disqualifies him as a Jon stand-in, because as we all know, Jon Snow can haggle like the best of fishwives.

- My absolutely favourite detail that has my jonsa heart singing - Rhaena was more dutiful than her sister and would have married a man that the king and council chose, saying that as long as he was “kind and gentle and noble, I know that I shall love him.” She was able to marry her first choice, whom the regents didn’t immediately approve of but that they ultimately accepted  - Ser Corwyn Corbray, the brother of the Lord Protector of the Realm, a second son (!) whose late father had gifted him the Valyrian steel sword Lady Forlorn (!!!)

And as a treat for @istumpysk, some similarities between Rickon and Viserys II!

- the youngest child of their family

- separated from their older brother after they were forced to flee their home, trying to get to safety while their other brothers and mother were at war

- worshipped their oldest (half-)brothers, but were closer to the brother nearest their age

- spends the war stuck on an island, populated by people closely linked to their family’s origins - Skagosi are descended mostly from the First Men, while Viserys was on Lys, where the blood of Old Valyria still runs strong

- sought by/held hostage by a powerful and wealthy family, who will treat them well but whose intentions are dubious

- will be brought back from exile by an upjumped bastard/commoner from a port town who was raised to lordship and became their monarch’s chief admiral

- after they are returned, long after the wars and crises, is happily welcomed as the heir to their older brother’s throne (shhhhh just let me have this, let the baby live)

Thanks for the ask!

[audreyimagines]

hello hello! this one came to me in the middle of the night and i simply HAD to request it-

so hear me out, teacher Reader. this happens before all the major everything when the members of the server were all little kids (except for like Philza since he’s Wilbur, Tubbo and Tommy’s dad (it’s not canon that Technoblade is Philza’s son so if you want to make him Philza’s son for this headcannon you can :D) and Reader was a traveling teacher who would stay in their client’s house for awhile and take care of/teach the children different subjects before going to the next client and then eventually returning (in a sort of cycle).

like Reader could’ve been the one to teach Technoblade about anarchy, Wilbur the guitar, Tommy sewing (i think i saw a headcannon somewhere that Tommy can sew/sew good enough to mend clothing and i adored it), and Tubbo the basics of potion brewing and gardening/taking care of animals (especially bees).

and maybe Dream invites Reader to the SMP (as after Reader’s teacher days they’ve started doing research into magic other than potion brewing and refined the art of enchantments) and just some fluffy reunions with Tommy, Wilbur, Technoblade and Tubbo after they see Reader on the SMP (and if it’s not too many characters maybe even Philza catching up with Reader in person (they’d probably exchange letters)

this is my first request with specific characters and i think that’s funny-

anyways take your time, have fun and have a lovely day ✨

teachers & tattletales

pairing - SBI FAMILY <333 x gn! reader

notes - this is so cute thank u for requesting!! SO LONG i apologize

word count - 986

——————————————————————————

it felt like so long ago.

you’d started your position as teacher for philza’s children long ago, before any of these wars and traumatic events.

four little brats running around...what a handful.

techno was the oldest, and thankfully he acted like it. you’d have many a night teaching him how to hold his little rubber sword and hit things. it was so only fair after all, the boy whizzed ahead in all of his studies. any book you gave him was read and analyzed in a day. when he got older, sometimes he’d sit on the roof with you, and ask questions about life and get advice. you’d scowled at the idea of heights, but the pink haired boy convinced you, and he easily became like a little brother. eventually, he even helped to take care of the others with you, though you still put him in his place.

wilbur was next, and oh lord was he a lot. the kid was smart, sure, but more street smart. you’d leave the room for them to take a written test and peek back in to see wilbur trading with the others for answers. that resulted in a whole conversation with phil, allowance was lowered and wilbur was furious. you could remember his little scowl so clearly. thank god the boy could be distracted by music. the second you figured it out, you were giving him little guitars and things to drum on. he was cunning too, always talking back and weaseling out of things. most of your attention went towards him.

tommy was loud. very very loud. he’d been the one phil warned you about, but he felt like the easier to you. the boy could stick to a task if you made clear it was important, and all work was done on time. he also loved to sew, and one time you helped tommy make a pillow for phil. all three of you cried. the only time he was unmanageable was when he was with tubbo, but that was expected.

speaking of tubbo, he was actually high maintenance. very polite, very sweet, but god what a head in the clouds. he never got stuff done on time, and you ere constant on his ass. he just didn’t seem to have enough motivation, unless it was gardening. the kid grew like seventeen kinds of veggies, and sometimes you’d eat them for lunch. when you weren’t scolding him and tommy, or having to do makeup work with him, he could be the easiest. those two situations were very common, however.

when you received a letter from dream, after taking years to yourself to practice witchcraft on your own, you were ecstatic.

it read,

dear y/n,

i understand you don’t really know who i am anymore. but i’m in prison, and trying to right some wrongs. if you could come to these coordinates, i think you’d be happy to see the boys you used to teach.

sincerely, dream

of course you set off instantly, reaching phil’s house in a few days. it was just as cold as you remembered, and you pulled your cloak closer to you as you opened the door.

“hello?” phil’s face melted from confusion to recognition and then joy as you hugged him. he pulled you in instantly, sitting down to make you tea and talk all about the years you’d missed.

“do you think i could see the boys?” you asked around the rim of your cup. phil shot up.

“oh my god i’m hogging you, of course!”

first stop was techno’s. the man just stared at you for a minute, taking you in. when he eventually hugged you, it was gentle, like he was afraid he’d break you. you swore you heard him sniffle, but techno denied it for years.

wilbur was next, and he was the same cocky bastard he’d been as a little kid, but taller. he was negotiating something with quackity when he saw you in the distance. wilbur mumbled something quickly to big q and then was bounding to you in an instant.

“long time no see.” he extended a hand.

“wilbur,” you mumbled happily, and the boy scooped you up in a hug. you could almost swear he said “so much longer than thirteen years,” but decided not to press it. instead you focused on the beanie boy in your arms.

phil warned you tommy might be a bit off, though he didn’t explain why. you didn’t ask, it was their own lives. tommy would tell you if he wished. when you reached his house and knocked, the boy who answered looked battered. it broke your heart.

“tommy!” you said. he shrunk back.

“don’t,” his voice was shaky, “don’t mock them.”

“what? tommy it’s- it’s me?”

you held your arms out and gently hugged him. it took a few minutes, but before long tommy was sunk into your embrace, sobbing.

tubbo was a bit less emotional, with you arriving at the giant mansion and just staring. holy.

an enderboy??? half ender??? whatever. someone answered the door, and blinked politely at you.

“can i help you?”

“oh, i’m sorry. i thought this was tubbo’s house.”

the mans face lit up.

“tubbo! someone’s here for you!”

before long the brunette rounded the corner, leading a small pink haired child by the hand. the kid fell, and tubbo scooped him into his arms. his gaze flipped you to you, and his mouth dropped wide open.

“TEACHER!” he was running at you now, quickly handing off the child to the enderman before tackling you with a laugh. once you got up, tubbo took you on a tour around the beautiful gardens he had. it made your heart swell.

after being invited to stay over by his now-introduced husband and child, you made plans with the rest of the family to see them tomorrow, and drifted to sleep, perfectly content.

[bonesandthebees]

Update: I forgot about 17 hours. I loved 17 hours because of the 2 povs and the collab and the parallels and the fact that a lot of the chapters dropped in one go but they weren’t very long (by your 8-10k standards) so I could just binge and the worldbuilding was so cool (that’s something you are consistently good at btw)

Honestly if you’d asked me a few months ago what my fav fic of yours was I would have said Someone else’s dream no hesitation, but you have dropped some really solid fics since and now I have to choose which is unfair. Stop being so talented /j. I also remember the worldbuilding really blowing my mind, because you have both magic and steampunk!? That’s something you can do? Also it’s when I first realised you wrote Wilbur as a perpetual middle child.

Also, for stars, you had me at space royalty au and the based on dune helped a little, but what really sold me is the interesting crimeboys dynamic. Because I already knew that you are good at those, so the premise of Wilbur being a bastard and getting shit cards in life but loving his brother so much that he would never do anything to change it (at the cost of Tommy) is very intriguing. And then I read the first chapter and we got Nikki and I got attached to this trainwreck of a main character.

Another fun fact, when a Stars chapter drops I spend about 2-3 hours on it. 1 for reading the entire thing (I read about 10k an hour) and mentally screaming and another 1 or 2 for analysing, getting my thoughts together and then (semi-)coherently dropping them in the asks.

-🌲

aaa thank you so much you're so sweet!! 17 hours was a lot of fun because I was able to write much shorter stuff than I usually do, since me and roxy were both writing half of each chapter so when combined the chapters would still be solid lengths. it made things go a lot faster and we were able to drop our giant chapter blocks all at once

again, definitely think there was stuff I could've done better on with someone else's dream but the worldbuilding was definitely my favorite part. I've always wanted to combine cyberpunk and fantasy stuff into a single story so it provided a really good medium to do that in! super fun for me to explore

yes wilbur is absolutely the perpetual middle child and i will die on this hill

the crimeboys dynamic in stars is so different from what i usually write and that's what makes it so fun for me. i'm so glad you're enjoying it just as much!! it's a really nice exercise in different dynamics so i'm enjoying it a ton. especially since i get to really go ham with wilbur being an absolute trainwreck

oh my god that's so much time. that's amazing that you spend so much time reading an analyzing my silly little words aaaa im so glad you're enjoying and i love hearing your thoughts on it!!! (new chapter hopefully will be out in the next few days btw, I'm almost done with it :D)

<3 spruce my beloved

[fedonciadale]

Oh for fuck’s sake! Again with those ageist, misogynistic anons? They make me so angry. What do they think will happen when they grow “old”? Stop reading, stop watching what they love? Stop writing if they are writers? How old do they think writers and directors are, anyway? Aren’t they gross and immature for actually writing their ships?

Look, I’m in my early 20s, I’m young. Even so, I noticed that the way I read, see, and interpret characters, dynamics and stories changes as I grow older and gain life experience. I still like my childhood fandoms, and why not? I love going back there, I adore that childhood feeling (I don’t know how to explain it, but I think you get what I’m saying), and I love realizing how differently I see them now that I’m older. For example, Harry Potter: the way I read it now is vastly different from when I first read it at 11. My approach changed, my understanding of the characters and their motivations deepened, I analyze the story and its meaning with another point of view than that of a child. I actually can’t wait to read Harry Potter again as an older, more mature woman, and as a mother! I bet my perspectives will deepen further, or maybe even change. The more experienced I get, the more insight I’ll gain in regards to the author’s choices. That’s what maturity means in this context!

By their logic, only teenagers should be allowed to write and enjoy fiction about teenagers, people in their 20s should write only for their peers, and so on and so forth. I want them to tell me how that could possibly make any sense.

Or perhaps they expect “old” people to watch and read passively, enjoying only to a certain extent, without caring too much and without shipping characters? Enthusiasm doesn’t vanish with age. Liking characters and dynamics is not inherent to adolescence. What on earth are we talking about?

Sorry for my rant, I just think it’s beyond frustrating that so many people think that, as we grow old, we shouldn’t engage in our passions anymore. I can’t imagine how incredibly annoying it must be for you, as the target of their criticism!

Personally, I love reading your metas, thoughts and fanfics. Your age makes you wise (not saying that every grown-up person is wise, though. Unfortunately, in some cases age adds nothing to one’s intelligence and maturity, but that’s off topic), and you’re certainly not immature for being an active part of a fandom and gushing over a ship.

Hi there!

Thanks for the heads up! Glad you like my stuff! 🤗

Ageism must be the most stupid of isms... I mean age comes for us all.

I suspect that anon actually believes that you stop having fun at a certain age. Wonder what they will do when they have reached my age... Hopefully by that time they look back at their younger self and feel some embarrassment.

And isn't it interesting that men are allowed to gush over football, their games, their handicrafts etc. But women are supposed to be 'mature'. 🤔

And yes, our perspective changes when we get older and when we read something more often. And this is a nice experience! Because hopefully we remember why we liked certain books and characters and still empathise with them.

HP is a good example. I read the books so differently now than the first time. I really thought Dumbledore was a kind old mentor on my first read. And now I think he was a manipulating cold bastard. I still think the character is compelling though. So, in a way I still 'like' him if differently. I still like Harry but I see his flaws more clearly and nowadays I think that the only really nice persons in HP are Luna and Neville. Lol.

I read the ASOIAF books now very differently from how I read them on my first read. My opinion on some of the POVs has changed very much. A reassessment of Tyrion, Sansa, Cersei for example. Some characters are my favs consistently though. I loved Jaime from the beginning and I still love my disaster Lannister. I still love Cat! - which does not mean that I do not see their flaws.

There is a certain magic though to reading a book the first time: sometimes I wish I could go back to my twelve year old self and experience the magic of reading LotR for the first time again, but I digress...

I actually think it is harmful to tell people that they can only read or write something written for them - be it their age group, their gender, their ethnicity - whatever...

Because reading and writing is actually the easiest way to empathise. And we should try to slip into other people's skin. Men should absolutely read Jane Austen and should experience some of the frustration of the expectations of society on women. White people should read about poc and their experiences. Abled people should read about the many difficulties of disabled. If I only read and write about my own bubble that is extremely restricting. We should absolutely stretch our imagination and challenge ourselves.

I just finish by sharing a funny story with you about how age changes perspective. When I was a child I watched a movie with my family and my sister and I absolutely fell in love with the main character. And somehow we didn't come across this film again.... And forgot the title etc. Years later my sister had managed to secure a DVD. We watched the movie, with high anticipation. And well. Let's just say the movie had a very old fashioned idea of women.... Afterwards we looked at each other and I said : OMG? This is such misogynistic crap! A childhood dream destroyed. We laughed so hard. 😂

Thanks for the ask!

[chattahoochiecoochie]

Various Storms and Saints Review

I’m alive! As per usual here is my disclaimer. I’m a fan in every sense, though I write fanfiction, and even some personal stories in my free time, I am in no way qualified to actually judge or critique anyones writing. Therefore, this is just a fun way for me to express what I liked about my most recent reads. Without further adieu lets get started.

This story is by @viridianatnight and can be found on AO3. 

This is going to be long, so pack in, I’ve got a lot of thoughts. First and foremost, I’m a summary kind of gal. I like to know what I’m getting into, I analyze the tags, fully digest the summary down to the punctuation. VSAS lacked a summary but the reviews were raving so I went ahead and dove head first. Man oh fucking man did she nail it. Maybe our dear author isn’t one for summaries or maybe she planned it. Every chapter had me on the edge of my seat, waiting for that final reveal, the big drop in plot, the crescendo. It was worth it. Through every guess and shot it the dark it was worth it. She delivered.

Every so often you read a story where there isn't a syllable wasted. This is one of those. From that damn pebble in a box all the way to Narcissa’s nickname for her son. My dragon? Are you joking me. 

Never before have I felt I have known Hermione. You love her, always, she's a star. But here she is human. Here she is a woman. Here is a character who I know, who I have met, who I will meet again in life. She is drowning and swimming, lost and found. She is me. She is all of us. Self loathing is so deeply tragic and for the first time that I have read, Hermione is tragic. This story is as much a romance as it is a tragedy for the ages. You watch the little girl you loved as a child, who’s character came alive on paper, start to die in front of you. Without becoming to much of a sap, the simple fact is this, if you as a woman want to feel seen go open your web browser and get to reading.

And Draco. What a man. Tall and handsome is to be expected, but multifaceted and palatable is another beast entirely--and yet here he is on screen, all of those things. His relationship with Theo is (I hate to overuse the word) human. They’re boys still, really, who love one another deeply but will never admit it without a fight. They’ll defend one another fearlessly and bite hard when confronted about it. Draco often has passion in the stories I’ve read but not like this. He has a fire inside him that burns for Hermione, for his best friend, for his mother, and even for his enemies. He is completely consumed by his love and his anger. He is almost nothing outside of those feelings. They make him as a man, good and bad. Sure he might be a touch scary but boy oh boy is he the kind of partner (and lover) we all long for. 

Before we get into the little things I want to talk about Ginny. What a star. What a friend. In most stories Hermione is cut away from the group, relegated to Slytherins almost entirely. Its wonderful to see her friendship with Ginny thrive, and even more to see it be genuine. There is sisterly love sure but Ginny puts up a fight, as every good friend has. 

Molly. You bastard. Her letter to Hermione left me gutted. Especially when she’d been so great at holding Ron accountable in the past. 

The cellphone was truly something special. The way it allowed Theo to step further into the light as a main character was brilliant. Speaking of his role, theres a happy ending! Our comic relief and great logician (seriously his wisdom is what held this all together) finally gets an ending he deserves. 

That of course launches me into another ramble. Queerness is so rarely written without angst. Seamus and Dean are just in love. There is no hardship or pain written about. They are two young men and they are in love and there isn't anything else to say about it. And the way that Theo feels no shame about being in love with a man, rather just shame that he can’t have him, its just beautiful. It’s simple and plain and perfect. 

Okay okay I know I said this was going to be long and I promise I’m wrapping up. Heres a rapid fire round before I sign off entirely. Lavenders death? Crippled me. She is a virtue? I squealed. Peace and love, I’m so sick of having to google French. So sick. So tired. I’ll keep doing it though, till the day a man calls me mon coer.

Honestly my joy is too much for words. This is one of the greats, without a doubt. Viridian, you have a gift, and I pray that you never stop wanting to share it with us. 

If you liked this review you can find my others here TRTTD | Manacled | Remain Nameless | Apple Pie and Other Amends Sorry if the links are funny, I completed traded places with my secondary blog a while back and its been weird :/

[eloela]

some stuff about names and how and why i picked them b4  i forgot

hesmeline - deformation of hermeline, from the roman de renart, some book i have to read and analyze when i was a student in litchacha ( a long long time ago ) and the fight between Hermeline and Hersent kinda stucked with me ( the girls are fightiiiiiing ). I exchanged the -r for a -s  bc it sounded more magical and princess like to me ( fun fact, hermeline means bear princess lmao ). In WTDS, it’s just a popular noble elven name from the time hesmeline was born.

bambi - she picked her name herself, some time after she “awoken”. Everyone called her (la) bambina, and then it became bambi, and they then decided to stick with it. Their real name is Marinella, i wanted a name that sounded italian/provençal and has some sort of link with the sea, since L’imperiale, the city where most of WTDS takes place, is based on a mix of my hometown ( port city ) and Rome !

gaspard - the era gaspard ( and ludovicus and necator, gaspard’s father and big brother ) was born is based on ancient greece/rome, but i wanted to have a name that wasn’t from that time period, something more “modern” to translate his gap with his time and family. It also sounds like bastard/bâtard, and that’s something Ludovicus was aware of, it’s a conscious choice. Gaspard is an unloved child, another failure in his father’s eyes. + also related to some very popular historical figure from my hometown 👀

moramant - just the contraction of mort ( death in french ) and amant ( lover in french ), moramant was hesmeline’s fiancé, and gaspard’s lover. His bonds with the main characters were/are romantic, and he’s believed to be dead at one point so here i go !!!!!! ( he was supposed to be dead ike forever in my first drafts of wtds but i grew fond of him... another stupid rich mean kid in my bag i guess ) It sounds kinda pompeous too, i think, and moramant is  ( just like hesmeline and gaspard ) very vain and pretentious. Stupid rich kids stuff i guess.

necator - murderer, killer in latin + also the name of some worm ??? or whatever lmao very fitting for the sexy villain of the story. Son of Ludovicus, brother of Gaspard, he was once Ludovicus’s general, extremely talented, and had won countless battles. Great magician. He was turned into a vampire by his own father, and has since then founded some uuuuh cult. he’s extremely jealous and resentful of gaspard. tries to kidnap/murder either moramant or hesmeline an awkward number of times.

[aion-rsa]

The Weird History of A Chinese Ghost Story Franchise

https://ift.tt/3oonTBD

When A Chinese Ghost Story premiered in 1987, it was already part of a unique category – the fusion of horror, comedy, and Kung Fu. Asian horror films are known as jiangshi, which is the name of a specific spooky hopping ghost found in Chinese folklore that proliferates these films.

Part zombie, part vampire, jiangshi are corpses that are usually reanimated by demons or Daoist sorcerers. They hop along mindlessly with their arms outstretched like sleepwalkers, and feed on the life essence – or qi – of the living. Often a jiangshi is blind but can smell breath. This makes for great comic hijinks as hapless characters struggle to hold their breath while gruesome jiangshi shove their rotting noses close to their mouths trying to pick up the scent.

Comedy is a common horror film device. It releases tension and leaves the audience unguarded for the next jump scare. The addition of Kung Fu is purely Hong Kong and can be traced to Sammo Hung’s groundbreaking Encounters of the Spooky Kind in 1980. Adding martial arts action comes naturally because in Chinese culture sorcerers and exorcists are Daoist or Buddhist Kung Fu masters. In the wake of that film, Kung Fu Horror Comedies became a thing of its own with plenty of franchises, most notably Mr. Vampire.

If the horror, comedy, and Kung Fu menage a trois wasn’t enough, A Chinese Ghost Story was one of the first films of a then-burgeoning period genre called FantAsia. FantAsia is the Chinese answer to sword and sorcery flicks. It includes superhuman Kung Fu (which means lots of wirework and flying about), magic spells and supernatural beasts. FantAsia is based on a longstanding body of fiction in movies and literature known as Wuxia, which means ‘martial heroes.’ 

A Chinese Ghost Story was produced by Tsui Hark, who spearheaded FantAsia with his Zu: Warriors From The Magic Mountain four years prior to A Chinese Ghost Story, and followed with many other FantAsia classics like The Swordsman, Once Upon a Time in China and Green Snake. Ching Sui-tung directed all three A Chinese Ghost Story films and continues to deliver FantAsia films like The Sorcerer and the White Snake, but Tsui is the undisputed father of the genre. 

The Chinese Twilight Zone from the 1800s

A Chinese Ghost Story retells a beloved Chinese tale of star-crossed romance. All these Chinese Ghost Story films are titled Qian Nu You Hun in Chinese, which translates into “beautiful woman dark spirit.” This is the story of Nie Xiaoqian, drawn from a 1740 short story compilation titled Strange Stories from a Chinese Studio by Pu Songling. These were stories of the supernatural world with covert social commentary, akin to The Twilight Zone today.

Tales from Strange Stories from a Chinese Studio have been depicted in countless Chinese films and TV shows, most recently in last year’s CGI-drenched FantAsia flick The Knight of Shadows: Between Yin and Yang where Jackie Chan played Pu Songling. Nie Xiaoqian’s tale is a favorite having been retold in over a dozen TV shows and the films mentioned here.  

In the original tale, Nie is a beautiful ghost, doomed to haunt an abandoned temple and hunt for souls for a demon that has enslaved her. She tries to capture a milquetoast travelling scholar, Ning Caichen, who manages to free her from her curse and takes her home to help his sickly wife. After Ning’s wife dies, he marries Nie and redeems her. In Chinese folktales, supernatural beings often strive to become human. It’s a device to analyze what being human means, akin to the journeys of Data, Seven of Nine, and T’Pol in Star Trek. 

There was a notable adaptation of Nie’s tale in 1960. For that film, Qian Nu You Hun was translated as The Enchanting Shadow and was Hong Kong’s submission for Cannes and the Academy Awards. In the lead roles were two of the most popular actors of their generation. Nie was Betty Loh Ti, who died tragically to an overdose at just 31. Betty was a classic beauty, perfect for Nie, and this was her most celebrated role. Ning was Zhao Lei who enjoyed a long career of over a hundred films from the early 50s to the late 80s.

The Enchanting Shadow is a gorgeous film with sumptuous sets and costumes, which is what gave it such international appeal. It plays out almost like a European gothic horror in its gradual pacing and eerie Theremin soundtrack. With its international acclaim, The Enchanting Shadow set the stage for A Chinese Ghost Story 27 years later.

The Chinese Ghost Story Trilogy

A Chinese Ghost Story casts the alluring Joey Wang as Nie and heartthrob Leslie Cheung as Ning. Also in the cast are Wu Ma as the Daoist exorcist Yin and Lau Siu-ming as the androgynous Tree Demoness (Lau is male). The Tree Demoness steals the show like she plucks the hearts of her prey. Shifting between male and female voices, she attacks with entangling roots reminiscent of The Evil Dead (although she penetrates her victims through the mouth not other orifices). Her main weapon is her tongue, which grows so long that it wraps around her prey, cuts down trees and mutates into fangs and tentacles of Lovecraftian proportions.

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By Kirsten Howard

Joey is entrancing, a seductive portrait of long flowing locks wrapped in diaphanous silk gowns. Everything is always blowing in the wind like Beyonce’s hair, lending a mysterious grace to Joey in every scene.

And Leslie is adorably naïve. Who can’t but sympathize for him getting smitten by mystical Joey and her luxurious eyebrows, even if she was trying to eat him? A Chinese Ghost Story was pre-CGI so the special effects are dated: stop motion zombies, puppet tongue prosthetics, post-production glowy effects and lots of wire work. But there’s a certain charm to the cleverness of the effects. It’s old school filmmaking and although it looks dated now, it still works.

Three years later, the cast was reunited for A Chinese Ghost Story II. It picks up where the original left off. Leslie is still the innocent Ning, thrust in a horrid world. To show the brutality of his environment, there’s an early homage to Yojimbo, with a stray dog fetching a severed human hand.

Ning is in trouble from the start. He accidently sits down in a restaurant for cannibals, and then gets thrown in jail. After Elder Chu (Ku Feng) helps him escape, Ning gets mistaken for Chu by his gang of rebels. One of the gang members is Windy, who bears an uncanny resemblance to Nie because she’s played by Joey Wang. Ning is smitten again.

New to the cast is another Daoist wizard named Autumn (Jacky Cheung) and his frenetic energy ramps up the comedy and action.

The sequel quickly goes to a lot of fun places with absurd fight choreography, Daoist and Buddhist magic, amorous naked hijinks, crazy flying sword blades and a hysterical giant gloppy demon puppet that’s tenuously held captive by a Daoist freezing spell. And the reveal of the main demon is over-the-top strange and hilarious. 

A Chinese Ghost Story III came out the following year, but it’s a break from the narrative. In the first film, the Tree Demoness was banished for a century, so the threequel skips forward to a century later, outliving Ning and the other good characters. Lau Siu-Ming reprises his Tree Demoness role and Joey Wang returns as another beautiful ghost named Lotus. She’s joined by her sister ghost Butterfly (Nina Li, Jet Li’s wife). Jacky Cheung returns but as a different character, the Taoist exorcist Yin. It’s the same name as Wu Ma’s character in the first film because Jacky plays Yin’s rejected student. 

Replacing the lovelorn Ning is a bumbling Buddhist disciple, Shifang (Tony Leung Chiu-Wai) and his master Bai Yun (Lau Shun). Their relationship adds its own comic relief. Early on, Shifang is splattered with blood while witnessing a random roadside sword fight, just like what happened to Ning, while Bai Yun meditates obliviously.

Although the weakest of the trilogy, the special effects have improved over the years. The Tree Demoness’ tongue lickings are more vicious, including a tongue’s eye-view as it deep throats its prey and swims down to pluck out its heart. Lotus attacks with her entangling locks and Butterfly uses telescopic fingernails.

Instead of Daoist sorcery, there’s more Buddhist magic: restraining sutra wraps, flying carpet cassocks, magic malas, and blood so pure that it is gold. And who can forget Bai Yun’s enchanted earlobes? The finale demon reveal is the strange bastard child of a Transformer and a Kaiju that doesn’t quite work but by then, things have gotten so outrageous that it doesn’t really matter.

More Haunting Chinese Ghost Stories

Tsui Hark returned to the romance of Nie and Ning in 1997 for A Chinese Ghost Story: The Tsui Hark Animation. That was during a pivotal year for Hong Kong because it was the handover when it ceased being a British colony and was returned to China. Consequently, Hong Kong cinema was on fire. Filmmakers had no idea what would become of their industry under communist China, so they were producing their edgiest political work as many tried to immigrate to other countries in fear of having their artistic vision oppressed. 

Hark had been working on the project for years and the animated format allowed him to unleash his vision like never before. This story stands independent of the others, but revisits characters developed for the threequel.

Ning and Nie are the same, although Nie is translated as Shine. Nie Xiaoqian translates to “whispering little lovely” so it’s unclear why Shine was chosen for the English language version. Other characters are translated literally like White Cloud and Ten Miles (translations of Baiyun and Shifang). Also appearing are Butterfly and the Tree Demoness, renamed Madame Trunk, along with her creepy bald minor demoness entourage.

Read more

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Zu: The Movie That Inspired Big Trouble In Little China

By Craig Lines

Replacing Master Yin is a new Daoist exorcist named Red Beard who travels in the bizarre magical giant transformer with temple bells for arms, a drum for a torso and barrels for legs. There’s also Mountain Evil, a giant rock star like demon that holds a concert and is obsessed with his hair. There’s a lot of music in this installment.

And Ning has a dog sidekick, Solid Gold, who serves as a comical canine conscience. For the Chinese versions, Tsui Hark voiced Solid Gold, which is funny because he only makes dog noises like barks and whimpers. 

Like the threequel, Ning finds himself in a cannibal restaurant but this time, it’s not in the normal world. This one is filled with demons. A Chinese Ghost Story: The Tsui Hark Animation is a deep dive into the yaoguai world.

Yaoguai means “supernatural and strange.” Fans of Asian cinema know it better from the Japanese term Yokai. It’s the world of magical creatures – fairies, demons, ghosts, immortals, enchanted snakes and foxes – different from the elves and gnomes found in Western folklore.

Hark’s animated film was echoed in Hayao Miyazaki’s Oscar-winning Spirited Away four years later. A Chinese Ghost Story: The Tsui Hark Animation transitions between conventional and CGI animation, which was groundbreaking then but comes off awkward today. It has its visionary moments but pales in comparison to the artistry of Spirited Away. 

In 2011, a remake came out, appropriately titled A Chinese Ghost Story 2011 and answered the question “What would A Chinese Ghost Story look like with today’s eye-popping CGI special effects?” Sadly, it doesn’t help despite a stellar cast.

Nie is played by Crystal Liu, who just appeared in the titular role in Mulan, but she falls short. Crystal is China doll cute, but she lacks the mystery needed for a haunting ghost. Ning is Yu Shaoqun. Like Leslie Cheung, Yu is a pretty boy singer, but doesn’t add much to the role beyond eye candy.

The Tree Demoness is veteran actress Kara Hui, who usually delivers gripping performances, but here she reduces the character to a cackling maniacal wicked witch that is strangely unsatisfactory.

There’s some redemption in the Daoist exorcists, which have a completely different and complex story arc. There are two, Yan Chixia, played by a brooding Louis Koo, and the one-armed Xia Xuefenglei, played by Louis Fan. The remake doesn’t capture the charm of the originals and the effects are unimaginative. This isn’t to say that this version is totally negligible. It has some moments like the villagers getting infected after rerouting water from the tree demon’s pool which makes them grow leaves. The villagers provide good comic relief. The sword fights are amusing too. The duel between the two Louises is high flying Kung Fu fun. The film is dedicated to the memory of Leslie Cheung, who tragically committed suicide by jumping off a building in 2003. 

Despite the title, A Chinese Ghost Story isn’t frightening. There’s nothing in any of the films that might keep one up at night. It’s a haunting tale of undying romance, retold with visionary action and hilarious slapstick moments that, apart from some splattered demon ichor, is family friendly, with about the same level of frights as the Ghostbusters franchise. But be warned. A Chinese Ghost Story opens the portal to the psychotropic genre of FantAsia Kung Fu horror comedies. Once entered, there are hundreds of films in this genre that can possess a viewer for months of binging.  

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A Chinese Ghost Story and A Chinese Ghost Story II are available on Amazon Prime.

The post The Weird History of A Chinese Ghost Story Franchise appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 245: The Second One

Previously on BnHA: We kicked off day one of New Internships with a fun-filled morning of shenanigans. Highlights included: (1) an old bearded man gallivanting around town telling everyone the world is going to end (and making a surprising amount of sense); (2) Bakugou and Deku attempting to rough up a group of impassioned hobos, only to have their thunder stolen from right underneath their noses; and (3) Hawks, the thunder-stealer himself, who proceeded to be all “what’s up fellas, hey Endeavor did you miss me?” Endeavor, who totally did miss him, pretended like he had not, and meanwhile Hawks introduced himself to Endeavor’s new trainees: Finger-Smashing Kid, Kid Who Used To Work For The Guy You Just Murdered, and Shouto (Just Shouto). Then he pulled out a copy of Re-Destro’s book and was all, “hey Endeavor have you heard of this book which was really important to the plot in the previous arc? I think you should read it, for reasons!!” and Endeavor just kind of stared at him, which wasn’t exactly inspiring. Anyways let’s see if these two idiots can manage to pull this off.

Today on BnHA: Hawks shoves the Liberation Army’s book into Endeavor’s hands while staring at him with the intensity of a thousand suns, and then, to avoid suspicion, proceeds to hand out another 500,000 copies of the book without even being asked. He then flies back to the PLF headquarters and is all “good news gentlemen, I gave out copies of the Army’s book to everyone in Japan!” and they’re all “that’s great, Hawks!” because somehow it turns out that this was actually a good plan. Back at the Endeavor Agency HQ, the kids meet Endeavor’s 30+ other sidekicks, who are all “now let’s all stand around and wait for Endeavor to tell us what to do.” Over in his office, Endeavor shrewdly deduces that Hawks was trying to tell him something, and pieces together the hidden code Hawks left in his book, which basically reads “IN FOUR MONTHS WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.” Back at the PLF, the League cheerfully discusses their plot to blow up the entire world come Springtime. Which apparently everyone is on board with. So, uh, does anyone else feel like they accidentally fell asleep during a really important part of the movie, because uh. What.

(All comments are my unspoiled reactions from my initial readthrough of the chapter. I did a quick edit for grammar and clarity afterward, and added a few ETAs in the process, but aside from that there are no changes.)

okay so two things: (1) as I mentioned in a previous post, Caleb Cook reported that this chapter took him more than 4 times longer than usual to translate. so like, what does that mean?? guess we’re about to find out!

and (2) HAWKS’S REAL NAME. I started typing up this recap early just so I could liveblog my reaction, since it seems that the databook has leaked, and I figure I’m going to stumble across this sooner rather than later. so I’m just going to look it up now here goes!!

AHHHH TAKAMI KEIGO AHHHH

lol. I have no idea what that actually means. let me look up some more stuff about this

oooh thank you reddit!

ooh damn, I love it!? “hawk” + “vision” lolol HORIKOSHI BACK AT IT AGAIN. but “watchman” is a really nice bonus what with how it relates both to the whole spying biz, and in a more general sense toward what he is trying to do as a hero trying to protect society. plus the name “Keigo” just has a really nice sound to it in general. kind of a boyish, youthful sound. not too hard or soft. idk. I like it. that was my favorite character in Bleach too

also apparently both of the kanji used for “Keigo” mean “enlightenment” oooh. my god I could analyze this all day. this being Thursday night, I’ll have some time to ruminate before I read the chapter tomorrow, so if I have any epiphanies I will add them in later!

(ETA: no additional thoughts on this right now, but there is now a ton of other content out from Ultra Analysis, so let’s take a quick look at some of that!

Haagen Dazs’s gender:  I now feel vindicated in continuing to refer to him as a “he” even after the face reveal! let this be a lesson to everyone never to judge a shounen character solely by how pretty they are. not that it wouldn’t have been nice to have another female villain! anyways the important thing is that I still don’t have his name memorized and never will!

Thirteen’s gender?!: now this, I don’t really like. Thirteen was already in the previous databook IIRC and their gender was ambiguous. which to be frank was awesome. having a canon nonbinary character was sick. why you gotta do this now Horikoshi smdh.

Reason for Shouji’s mask: nooooo poor Shouji. people in quirk society are jerks! lol I get the arms being scary, but his face?? now I really want to see what he looks like though. it would be cool if he became more accepting of himself as a result of hanging with his chill classmates and decided to ditch the mask. anyways my boy needs a hug.

and there’s a lot of other stuff, including a whole series of cute segments showing the characters’ relationships with each other, but I think I’ll save those for another post because otherwise this would get way too off-track. but man, so far I’m really loving this.)

okay kiddos. it is now Friday, and time to take our horse to the hype town road. I have been waiting all fucking week for this shit so it had better not disappoint!

“Rising to Action” ooh, nice. guess this is not much of a “sit still” gang, here

okay so we’re picking off right where we left off, and guys, I just need to know, does anyone other than me find this kind of hilarious

like, I don’t know why but just. Endeavor’s face. omg. he just looks like he’s trying so hard to figure out what’s wrong. I think what it is is that this is the exact same bemused/perplexed expression that Shouto gets on his face all the freaking time, and it just tickles me to no end that the apple apparently doesn’t fall far from the tree. ahh Shouto I know you don’t want to hear this but damn boy you look like your dad

anyways. I think we can all agree Endeavor should not be looking this adorable and what the hell. let’s move on

LOOOOOOL

why is this so funny ahhhhhhh. they’re so fucking serious please stop. I mean, but of course they’re serious, though. the weird one is me, right? whatever!

so now here’s the handoff. between these two super-serious dudes

Endeavor you had better not do like me and be all “of course I’ll read it!” fully intending to follow through (really!) but then you never do and everyone is super disappointed and you start to read something else instead, all the while feeling incredible guilt! my point is, Endeavor, I hope you don’t have ADHD or we’re all fucking screwed omg

lol though thankfully we have a backup!

“oh boy!” clamors Deku, a gleam of excitement in his eye. “homework!”

OH MY GOD

WHO ARE YOU, OPRAH

ff now he’s just SLAPPING THEM INTO THEIR HANDS omg. this is amazing

love how Katsuki is keeping an extra 1.5 meters of space in between him and the others because cooties. or something

anyways! I really want them all to read it actually so this is awesome! KACCHAN YOU ESPECIALLY. I want you to read it and then give it a disgusted 1 star review on goodreads. show me how much you’ve grown kiddo

lmaooo

Todoroki Shouto. god’s perfect idiot. bless this child. someone explained Occam’s razor to him one day, and he just sat there nodding like “yes that makes perfect sense” and proceeded to apply it to every fucking thing in his life from there on out. “what’s Hawks doing carrying around 10,000 copies of The Book of PLF and just handing them out to strangers like an old lady on Halloween? processing... processing... oh I see, he probably just REALLY LIKES THE BOOK how keen”

this is what Hawks is up against. this squad of certified morons with two whole brain cells shared among them on a good day. boy literally brought three backup secret messages just in case Endeavor was too dense to figure this out, only to watch these kids exclaim, with perfect sincerity, “GOSH, HAWKS MUST REALLY LIKE THIS BOOK, HUH”

and meanwhile the best Endeavor can do is “............something.......... feels.... off.......” fml. we’re all gonna die. Hawks, I’m sorry. you tried!! next time give Momo your secret message instead!

so now he says that he’s actually recommending this book to all of his acquaintances omg. don’t tell me this handsome canary is actually going around handing out books to every single person he knows?? all to cover up this one action of giving Endeavor the book with the secret message highlighted in it?? okay guys help me decide: is this brilliance or stupidity? like, what is even going on inside Hawks’s head. “I’ll just fly around handing out copies of Atlas Fucking Shrugged to everyone I meet. that’ll seem really natural”

I s2g Endeavor if you don’t follow up on this...! THE WORLD IS COUNTING ON YOU YOU BIG MEATHEAD. GET TO READIN’. MAKE LEVAR PROUD

and now Hawks is flying away with his hands in his pockets

godspeed you dramatically casual bastard

now Deku is all “you know, he’s not much older than us, but he really seems like he’s got his shit together!” which, yeah. don’t you hate that? the truth is though it’s all an act, and he’s actually just as screwed up as the rest of you! the moral is: never trust any 22-year-old who seems like they’ve got their shit together. because, no. he sits on a throne of lies

Endeavor are you actually being thoughtful??!

oh my god. we may actually have a chance here. praise be

now we are cutting to the Endeavor agency! guys, fucking look at this fucking ‘E’, though

ngl that shit is dope. I’m mad. I would buy his merch just for the logo and I hate that about myself

holy shit

the... flaming hot... oh my god

holy shit there’s so many of them

(ETA: hold up -- “Bakugou” and “Shouto”? this is a crucial detail here; they’re using Bakugou’s last name, but Shouto’s given name. so either they’re calling him Shouto because they know his pop, or -- more likely -- they’re calling him “Shouto” because that’s his hero name. in which case, “Bakugou” most likely also refers to “Bakugou” as in the hero name, not his actual name. meaning that still is his hero name. meaning he is still undecided. fucking... Katsuki. honey. why.

ffff and the new databook seems to support this too. instead of a hero name, Horikoshi just wrote “XXX” indicating he still hasn’t made up his mind. welp. looks like it’s back on that slow burn character development train, folks. maybe by the end of this arc, though? please? Horikoshi? Horikoshi damn it look at me.)

so this is how the number one operates, huh. meanwhile All Might only ever had one sidekick, and reluctantly at that. he really was so far out ahead of everyone else that he was basically untouchable. crazy

anyways, yes! they don’t know anything about anything so please teach them!

good grief this girl says Endeavor has over thirty sidekicks?? lmao and her name is “Burnin’.” please tell me the missing g is an actual part of her name please I need this

wow, Burnin’ really went and tried to pick a fight with my famously hot-tempered son knowing full well what his personality is like. and just look at him keeping his cool and firing back though

oh, Katsuki. [hair ruffle] he will thrive here

damn these guys are passionate

Endeavor seriously picked these people as his sidekicks? that Endeavor? they didn’t annoy the shit out of him?? that man is an enigma

btw can we all just stop here for a moment and give a shoutout to this horse-looking dude because. look at him. amazing. new fave

anyway so now the mummy-looking guy is explaining how they organize their shift schedule

so professional. this really is the big leagues

yoooooo my boy is FIRED UP. READY TO SAVE SOME BITCHES! YESSSSS WIN AND RESCUE LET’S DO THIS

LET’S FUCKING GOOOO omg I love him so much. Kacchan you need to cool it or I’m going to spend this whole fucking chapter ruffling your hair

(ETA: incidentally, here’s something I neglected to point out earlier: in spite of being a belligerent asshole in general, Katsuki for the most part is actually surprisingly respectful to most adults, especially heroes. so it’s interesting then that so far, this doesn’t seem to apply to Hawks. he almost seems to consider him another rival rather than another mentor/teacher-type figure to learn from. I wonder if this is because -- as Deku pointed out earlier this chapter -- Hawks is much closer to them in age than the other heroes. it’s interesting that that was pointed out -- and that in the very next panel Katsuki was grumbling about how Hawks pisses him off, at that.

anyway. this BakuHawks rivalry seems to be an established thing now, so I’m very curious to see how this develops.)

lol now Mummy Guy is all “that’s great! now we just need to wait for Endeavor to tell us what to do!” and Kacchan is like “WHAT”

I mean, he’s got a point lol. “we’re so busy!” “great let’s get to work!” “actually we don’t have any work yet!” like, what a fucking tease. don’t worry Kacchan, they’re just waiting to make sure they assign you boys a job that’s plot-related so we don’t waste any time

ahhh, and now we finally come to the moment we’ve all been waiting for! the part that apparently took four hours to translate! ENDEAVOR READING A BOOK

yeah he was acting like he had a freaking gun to his head. why don’t heroes have secret code phrases they can use to let each other know some weird fucking shit is up? or maybe they do, but since he’s being recorded and since PLF has some heroes on roster who probably know those same codes (looking at you, Slidin’), Hawks didn’t want to risk one of them figuring it out. that makes sense

ahhh, here we go

don’t tell me Caleb tried to translate this whole thing. though I gotta admit I am hella curious

anyway. so the rest of this page is Endeavor metaing about Hawks, and it’s some good stuff, ngl

he really is fond of him, huh. look at all those pictures. how many mental snapshots did you take of this kid smiling?? he’s so adopted it hurts

and look at the concern in that last panel! “why is he acting so weird, that’s not like him, I’ve got to get to the bottom of this.” damn, Hawks really did put his trust in the exact right person and it’s paying off

ENDEAVOR STOP MAKING THESE SOFT WORRIED FACES ABOUT HAWKS RIGHT THIS INSTANT I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THESE FEELS

god damn!! I don’t know why, but I continue to be surprised and impressed at how the character development of Endeavor is actually a subscribe and save deal and not just a one-time purchase. fucking look at Todoroki Enji, proud annual recipient of a different “world’s worst dad” mug every Father’s Day, actually caring enough about another human being to notice the subtle changes in his behavior and realize something is wrong. bruh. good for you!! human compassion is a damn good look for you, negl. fucking growth right here and I’m here for it

anyways, on to the hidden code!

and here are all of the highlighted portions for your code-breaking pleasure

fucking feel like I’m reading Detective Conan right now. yeesh

oooh!

BINGPOT LOOOOOL WHY DID I GET SO EXCITED OKAY LET ME GO BACK AND READ!

“the” “enemy” “liberation” “army” ahhhhhh! HAWKS YOU SNEAKY SON OF A BITCH. GOOD JOB ENDEAVOR!

and now we’re cutting back to Hawks, nooooo I wanted to see Endeavor’s reaction! come on!

lmao although it’s worth it to see Hawks mentally roasting Endeavor exactly like I was mere pages ago omg

his fucking face omg. that’s right Hawks, he’s not the brightest crayon in the box. not the sharpest tack in the bulletin board. he’s a few fries short of a happy meal. the elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor

but give him some credit, though! because he did figure it out! not necessarily because he was clever, but because he knows you!

oh shit lol

OH SO YOU PLANNED THAT PART TOO. WELL OKAY THEN

goddamn. he really is a clever bastard. and okay but in all seriousness, I fucking love that he has enough faith in this weird connection between them that out of all the ploys he could have gone with, this is what he chose. he seriously put all his eggs in the “Endeavor will figure it out from my face” basket. and it fucking paid off. this is awesome

AHHHHHHHHHHHH HERE WE GO

LOOK AT HIS EYE OH MY GOD. YOU CAN SEE THE EXACT MOMENT WHEN HE REALIZES HOW SCREWED THEY ALL ARE, YES, FUCK, THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR OH GOD

and we’re cutting back to Hawks again! I’ll just assume the rest of his message went something like “we” “are” “boned” and Endeavor’s face was like :o

BACK AT THE OL’ VILLAIN HOTEL!!!

LOL WHAT IS THIS

THEY HAVE A FUCKING COUNCIL NOW

whose seat is that over on the left? Hawks’s? is Gigantomachia actually wearing a shirt?? AND SHOW US TOMURA’S FACE HORIKOSHI YOU COWARD

lmao oh my god are they really buying this shit

look at him. so trustworthy. nothing to suspect over here! just a 100% sincere born-again villain committed to the cause!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NOOOOOO MY BABIES ARE EXPOSED. HORIKOSHI YOU BETTER PROTECT THEM I SWEAR TO GOD!!!

wow is the whole conversation just shifting over to the topic of Deku now, seriously?

oh my god oh my god oh my god. like. it’s been so long since the forest lodge and Kamino that I almost forgot that the League already knows these kids. they did fight Deku and Shouto briefly in the woods, and then they had an extended fight against Katsuki later on, although Dabi was unconscious for that part. anyways, shit. just like that they’re on their radar again I’m getting chills omgggg

(ETA: at least they’re underestimating them, though. “looks like he hasn’t gotten much stronger.” boy have you not heard about his bloop? that bloop will fuck you up just you wait!)

so now have some weird panels of Hawks walking through a door

(ETA: ohhhh you can see the door closing on the tip of his wing close-up! sneaky!)

ooh! wtf are you serious he can use his feathers to eavesdrop?!

(ETA: it only just clicked on my second read-through that Spinner of all people appears to be the mastermind behind this plan? like, am I reading this right? is he Tomura’s second-in-command now or what? damn, boy, good for you.)

okay, question. if he could do this the entire time, why did they even need him to pretend to join the League at all? I guess you never know when having a man on the inside who can possibly influence their decision-making will come in handy. but still, it seems to me like he could have easily done the spying bit without ever having to join up. ehhh but I guess there’s probably a range limit, and too much risk of the feathers getting caught and destroyed... eh, fine. I’ll allow it

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT EXCUSE ME WHAT?????

AND OF COURSE THAT’S THE END OF THE CHAPTER, LOL, FUCK. EXCUSE ME WHILE I GO STAND IN A CORNER AND SCREAM

lol “danger lurks” fucking you think?? what the hell! so they have an actual plan already, with the details outlined to the extent that they actually have a freaking timetable and everything? and the Liberation Army is on board with this whole thing too? the “destroying everything” part and all? this is too much to process all at once fuck me I can’t

okay! so four months from now is also when the kids will enter their second year! so that means Shinsou can get in on this action too. I’m trying to think of other significant plot things this could potentially imply, but none are coming to mind right now, other than it’ll be the anniversary of USJ. but that’s basically it. -- oh, wait, this also means that there’ll be a new first-year class of students at U.A. too! so that could be interesting. some potential new characters, and a chance for Deku and the others to be senpais. incidentally, to the best of my knowledge the kids will all stay in the same class and Aizawa will continue to be their homeroom teacher in year two. so nothing will change really aside from them becoming 2-A rather than 1-A. and Shinsou joining them, as mentioned. omg

anyway! let me see, any other stray thoughts before I wrap this up? I guess it’s worth noting that Toga’s eye is fine. the League has healed up pretty nicely in general actually. like, that’s seriously impressive for a group that doesn’t have Recovery Girl on staff. how long has it even been since Deika? a few weeks? this is almost ridiculous

and the “boom” -- is that literal? like they’re actually planning to blow everything up? or is that a metaphorical boom. fucking what kind of plan did they come up with where they actually think they can destroy THE ENTIRETY OF JAPAN all at once? is there a doomsday device?? what exactly is this “power” they’re talking about? HAWKS WHY DIDN’T YOU PUT THAT IN YOUR STUPID MESSAGE YOU BOOB

hahaha. anyways. it came down to the last two pages, but that certainly was a reveal worthy of all the hype. to sum: yikes

[girlmeetsliv3]

Boundaries II

Warning: The following story contains mentions of mental health disorders, depression, anxiety, manipulation, abuse, and vivid descriptions of abusive acts. The behavior and mindset of the characters in this will be incredibly yandere and toxic. This is a work of fiction and doesn’t represent the character of bangtan sonyeondan. Enjoy ~~~ 

Kim Taehyung had always known the kind of life he would live. The prodigal son of a sick woman and a bastard of a man. At three years of age, his psychiatrist had deemed him an exceptionally bright boy with a tendency to apply those wits to methods of extreme torture and weaponize them as a mean of instant gratification. His mother had managed to convince his father that the young boy's odd tendencies could not be beaten out of him, but required medical treatment; of course, that had cost her a swollen lip and injured wrist. After his diagnosis, treatment began immediately. First, the doctor ordered the removal of any emotional or physical triggers in the Taehyung’s life. He was immediately placed into a foster home and banned from having any contact with his biological parents. Second, understanding where and when it was acceptable to release his darker urges as a mean of stress relief. Various scenarios were discussed with the young boy, only when he was in danger or when his rage aided others could he utilize it. Lastly, a support system with means of controlling and understanding him. It was supposed to be his psychiatrist, the nurses, or even his parents; but Taehyung found his support system in you.

When the time to enroll in primary school had rolled around, it was a unanimous decision that the only way to test if Taehyung could function in society was to allow him to participate in it. Neither the school administrators nor his teachers were informed, for they wanted fair treatment. When the first day of school rolled around, the boy began to experience something he never had: nerves. Most of his early years were spent in a clean sterile environment surrounded by people twice or three times his age. How exactly was he to behave like a normal child, when he himself didn’t know what a child was. It didn’t take him long to figure it out though. By the time the teacher had announced it was break time, Taehyung found that being a child consisted of being presumptuous, picking on others, and forming distinctive cliques of friends. His distaste may have also been that once he stepped into class, one of the taller boys had made fun of his dialect and since then no one had dared talk to him.

Taehyung had taken it as a threat and planned to hurt the boy after class had concluded. So, he sat alone in the corner letting his mind wander into all the different ways he could harm him. He rationalized it was acceptable, for he was only allowed to hurt others when he was in danger and the boy had practically threatened him. He failed to notice the small girl in pigtails with matching red scrunchies walking towards him until she stood right in front of him. When he finally looked at her, he noticed she was different: her cheeks, eyes, lip shape, and complexion were entirely different from his and everyone else’s. She stood out and it intrigued him, for he related to her. When she spoke, her mouth moved oddly and her words were a string of Korean and gibberish interlaced. Had he not been able to pick up on social cues, he would’ve assumed she was making fun of him like the others - but it was her outstretched hand that let him know differently.

It was a gesture he had learned to associate with ‘hello’ or ‘help.’ Whenever the nurses gave Taehyung his medicine they would hold out their hands so he could squeeze it tightly, transferring the pain from him to them. He had also witnessed that whenever people met they held hands, only if for a moment. He had been analyzing your palm, its length, width, and size when he noticed it began to shake. Afraid that you would take it away, that you would abandon him, he grasped it painfully tight. He failed to notice you wince at his strength due to how happy he was, that he was not alone anymore. That you, a stranger, were there to help him when so many others had judged him and alienated him. After being alone in the dark for so long, he longed for the light you seemed to have in you. He wanted to bask in the sunlight with you, and if you refused to share then he would ensure both of you rot in the dark.

His obsession with you was obvious to those around him in his personal life. All he ever spoke about to parents, nurses, and doctors was you: your smile, your hair, your clothes, your smell. He was excited and genuinely happy. But when he misbehaved by trying to sneak into the girl’s bathroom, the doctor threatened to not allow the two of you to be friends anymore he understood that he must keep you a secret. In order to make sure, no one would separate you. That day after the visit, he’d come home crying to his parents and told him all the supposed things his psychiatrist had done to him during the time they were alone and he was never taken there again. It was better, for it meant he could spend more time with you, but without his medicine or emotional relievers, he found dark urges returning to him more frequently and he indulged in them like never before.

Pigeons, lizards, insects, and other small things became a good way to hurt without creating too much of a mess or drawing too much attention. That stopped once you caught him in the act though, and he grasped that just because you were best friends didn’t mean you accepted all of him. You would come to, however, that he was sure of. As he got older, he began to experiment with different alternatives to subside him: news articles, torture porn, crime documentaries, and his imagination. None proved effective and Taehyung was a ticking time bomb. He was reaching his limit and needed a release or he was going to snap and anyone or anything in his proximity would be collateral. His prayers were answered in the form of Park Jimin getting beat up in an ally. It was a beautiful sensation. Taehyung also discovered that it was not just the feeling of flesh and bones breaking, but the expressions one would display before death that elated him.

It was a pity that you had to bear witness to it. After that moment you had begun to change around him. No longer would you hold him, treat him with warm affection, and claim the two of you would never stop being friends. You now looked at him with fear, there was a hesitation in every one of your movements around him, and whenever he kissed your cheek or caressed your face goosebumps appeared on your arms. When you had asked for boundaries, he had agreed if only because he believed it would make you grow fond of him. The two of you were soulmates and spending time with regular people would make you realize how superior the two of you were to the rest of them. The opposite happened. More boundaries were created and you seemed determined to trap him inside all the yellow lines he could not cross until he could no longer reach you. His feelings for you began to change from want to need, love to desire, and an insatiable bloodlust formed within him.

The girls he fucked looked like you or sounded like you. He watched you and counted down the seconds until you spoke to him again. He was desperate for you. Even his friends began to notice his behavior and after a particularly angsty night, they suggested he get back at you by sleeping with your best friend. Easier said than done, but he had a plan. He had casually mentioned the party the last time you both had been together. It was in your living room when your mom had finally left for work. It had been a while since you had hung out in public with him. He was reduced to short visitations once or twice a month; as if he was some distant unliked relative. You responded with mild interest, but when he poked fun at you for never going out he knew his plan was set in motion. The party was typical. the only excitement was getting to observe you from a comfortable corner on the couch instead of underneath your bushes or through an obstructed window as he was used to.

Once you placed down the red solo cup and headed upstairs, he quickly activated his charm mode and made his way to the girl dancing sloppily in the middle of the dance floor. She was beyond inebriated, but he couldn’t care less. It was pathetic to him how all he had to do was whisper a couple compliments in her ear and she already began to drag him upstairs. With his guidance, they ended up in the master bedroom, where he heard the faucet in the bathroom running. Instantly, Taehyung latched his lips onto her neck and drew out a throaty moan from her. He was riled up. He wanted you to come out and see them together, hell he would even fuck her just to see your shocked expression. But as the seconds passed and you made no effort to make your presence known, he became angry. How dare you not play with him?! How dare you refuse to be his anymore?! How dare you remain in that stupid bathroom, when it should be you underneath him panting his name?! How dare she not be you?!

Taehyung failed to notice how his hands had crawled up to the girl’s throat, nor did he pick up on when gasps of pleasure turned to that of pain. It wasn’t until she clawed at his hands that he noticed, still his anger had consumed him by that point and he figured that if you didn’t love him - you should fear him. He continued to apply pressure until the gurl’s breathing shallowed and she passed out then, he stood up and left. Making sure to slam the door loud enough for you to hear, so you would come out and see the present he had left for you. He was certain once morning rolled around, you would come to him begging for forgiveness and eager to please. The exact opposite occurred. You had misunderstood his message as an omen, leading to the conclusion that the two of you could be no more. Or as you had phrased it, “Perhaps none of the boundaries worked, because there wasn’t a physical one.” He lost it.

As you drove off, he stood frozen staring off into space trying to comprehend where everything went wrong. For days on end, he racked his brain trying to decipher everything until he landed on one word: boundaries. Ever since he could recall, everyone around him had placed boundaries on his emotions, behavior, and thoughts. Telling him what he can or can’t do. What is or is not acceptable. In following those boundaries, he had not been his true self but a persona around everyone including you. That explained your behavior: you were confused as to who he really was and upset that he lied to you - concealed himself. Due to this, you had set boundaries around yourself, in order to understand him more. It all made sense. But there would be no need for that anymore. Between Taehyung and you, there were to be no more boundaries; emotionally, mentally, and/or physically. The two of you would give yourself to each other unconditionally so that nothing could ever tear you apart.

Taehyung knew that you needed time and he granted you what you desired. That doesn’t mean he needed to stop being a part of your life, it just meant you had to remain unaware that he was. It was quite easy. The city was full of people and after spending months there you too picked up on the habit of walking facing the ground and only paying attention to things directly in your line of vision. It aided a lot. He knew about everything: your university, internship, job, social life (or lack thereof), and even your sleeping problems. Taehyung found himself enjoying the city, it was full of people like him and they all blended so well into the society that they need not hide. He knew that this type of environment, however, was killing you. Still, where he lived no one would question if he came in carrying an unconscious girl or if he was soaked in blood, it was nice.

Finally, the day came, he had called human resources in your job anonymously threatening to file a report since in the three years you had been working there you’d never had a day off. He knew why you did it. It was a distraction from your thoughts and him, but it would be more suspicious if you suddenly didn’t show up to work the next day. He planned to break in the middle of the night, but he thought that if there was any possibility you would be awake he’d take it just to see your reaction. It was perfect. It reminded him of the first time the two of you met and had him longing for the old days. So much so that when he grasped you in his arms he whispered the words that had started it all. The ones that made him fall for you. The ones that sealed your fate. Taehyung lifted you in his arms and carried you out of the apartment, heading to your new home excited for what would occur once he got there.

-

You awoke nude on a bed with your limbs tied forcefully apart. Your senses were still muddled as you tried to grasp what had happened and then you saw him. He entered in stark naked with a smile adorning his features, it was like his first smile so long ago. Once he saw that you were awake he rushed towards, jumping on the bed to straddle you and planting harsh unwanted kisses all over your face. “I’m so glad you’re awake y/n. Now we can get started.” His tone was light and playful, which only caused terror to grow in you. “Get started with what?” you asked softly, tears brimming your eyes as the devilish man leaned closer to you. He chuckled, “We’re getting rid of all the boundaries that have ever plagued us and stopped us from being truly happy.” His hands ran along your entire body and vile rose in your throat as the tears spilled. He didn’t notice or didn’t care. “First, we begin with emotional boundaries where we’ll be completely open and honest with each other. Then, the societal boundaries where we can indulge in our darkest desires. Finally, we’ll destroy your support system. Since your mind seems so keen on making you resist me, I’ll break it.”

You were openly sobbing now and thrashing against him, whilst he looked to be in heaven. His hands wrapped tightly around your throat constricting the air supply to some shallow breaths, “And if life is persistent in keeping us apart, then we’ll be together forever in death.” He squeezed until he felt your breathing halt and your eyes roll into the back of your head. You weren’t dead, merely in a temporary state of unconsciousness. When you woke up again - the real fun would begin.

[kagehinataboke]

New prompts? yay I love your work! Can you do number 11 bakutodo but with todoroki being the only one little? Maybe a quirk hit him and it made him a little boy again? Thank youuuu ❤

yes, this sounds so cute!!! big uwu

tdbk: [11] aged down characters

***

“What… the… fuck?” Bakugou blinks several times, but the nightmarish sight in front of him won’t go away. “What the fuck?” he repeats, because there really isn’t else to say.

“I don’t know,” Todoroki says in his prepubescent, soft, high-pitched voice. “I woke up this morning and found myself like this. I think it’s an after-effect of that villain fight yesterday. Her quirk had something to do with aging, didn’t it?”

“Forget that.” Bakugou gestures at Todoroki’s tiny kid body, enveloped in one of Bakugou’s old skull T-shirts. “You’re a fucking toddler.”

“I actually think I’m around seven or eight,” Todoroki corrects, swinging his legs back and forth on Bakugou’s desk chair. He seems to realize what he’s doing and looks at Bakugou with the utmost desperation. “Please help me get back to normal.”

Part of Bakugou really wants to tell him to fuck off, but he can’t just leave his boyfriend as a kid. That’s very illegal. And gross. But what the hell is he supposed to do to fix this? He’s never de-child-fied someone before. Obviously. Where does he even start?

“Fuck,” Bakugou grumbles aloud, pushing himself out of bed. “Let’s go find Aizawa I guess.”

“Do you think he’ll know how to fix it?” Todoroki follows Bakugou out of the dorm, glancing around nervously. “I don’t want anyone else to see me like this…”

“He always knows how to fix shit like this,” Bakugou dismisses. “Well just explain the situation, tell him about the mission yesterday, and see if we can figure out the villain’s quirk— Icy Hot?” Bakugou turns to find Tododoki several feet behind him.

“My legs are short now,” he mutters after catching up. “Don’t laugh. Can’t you walk slower?”

This might be fun, after all. Bakugou bends down so he’s eye-level with the little Todoroki, trying and failing not to smirk. “I’ll carry you. Hop on my back.” Under normal circumstances, Todoroki would freeze Bakugou’s hand to the wall if he suggested something like this. But the eight-year-old Todoroki isn’t exactly in a position to say no.

“Fine,” he grumbles, “but you’d better not tell anyone about this.”

“Roger that, Ice Princess. Wow, you’re so light. And tiny.” Bakugou shifts Todoroki’s weight, which is barely noticeable. “It’s kinda cute.”

“Shut up and walk.” Todoroki buries his face between Bakugou’s shoulders, tugging on his neckline demandingly. His personality didn’t get any more innocent, at least. It would be comforting if it wasn’t so annoying.

***

“This is him? Really?” Aizawa squints at Todoroki, who squirms in his chair. “Amazing,” Aizawa continues, poking the cheek where his scar used to be. “His body has completely reverted to a much younger age. I’ve never seen a quirk work like this before.”

Todoroki smacks his hand away impatiently. “Is there a way to fix it or not? I’m sick of being a child.”

“I’ll have to look into the villain’s quirk,” Aizawa mutters, more to himself than to them. He rubs at his eyes, retrieving a phone from his back pocket. “I’ll call Nezu and see what the protocol is for a situation like this. Bakugou, look after him until we know the full extent of the quirk’s effects.”

“This is just fantastic,” Todoroki murmurs as soon as Aizawa disappears into the hall. “Why did this have to happen? We were careful on the mission, weren’t we?”

Bakugou tries to be sympathetic, but it’s taking all the willpower he has not to laugh at the sight of little Todoroki with his stick-thin arms crossed. “We’re always careful,” he says, coughing to hide his amusement. “Some quirks are just fucked up. We couldn’t have seen this coming.”

Todoroki stays silent, but Bakugou can tell he’s sulking. Part of him wants to give the moron shit about it, but if their situations were reversed, he’d be losing his mind. Instead, he pats Todoroki’s tiny shoulder. “It’ll be okay, Icy Hot. Aizawa always figures this type of shit out. See, here he comes now. He’s probably already found a way to get you back to normal.”

“I don’t have a way to get you back to normal,” Aizawa says, shattering Bakugou’s half-assed optimism. “Yet. Nezu is going to speak with the police force to see about analyzing the villain’s quirk. Until then, we’ll just have to monitor you, Todoroki.”

“You’re kidding.” Todoroki’s face falls. “How king will I be stuck like this?”

“We’ll turn you back to normal,” Aizawa assures him. “The safety of the students is U.A.’s top priority… Usually. Nevertheless, it’s pointless to worry. Just lay low for today, and I’ll come to you when we have a solution.” Aizawa gestures at Bakugou. “Take him back to your room. I don’t want him alone.” He lowers his voice to whisper, “And don’t provoke any strong emotions in him. In his current state, I can’t be sure what will happen.”

***

“UNO. Victory. That’s four wins in a row for me.”

“Why the fuck are you so good at this?” Bakugou slams his cards against the table irritably. “Let’s do something else, before I strangle you.”

“I don’t think you meant to say that out loud.”

“Did I fucking stutter?” Bakugou exhales a tense breath to calm himself down. “Okay… How about some food? Can you stay here until I get back?”

“I want to go with you.”

“No. Do you want others to see you like this?”

Todoroki hesitates, but refuses to give up. “I’m coming with you. Aizawa said not to leave me alone, anyway, so let’s get going.”

Dammit, Bakugou really hates when he’s right… “Fine, asshole. But I’m not carrying you again.” He locks the door and starts down the hallway.

“Then walk slower, Katsuki. That’s not slow in the least, and you know it. You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

Bakugou smirks, slowing to let Todoroki’s corgi legs catch up. “Maybe a little. You’re just so fun-sized.” He tries to pinch Todoroki’s cheek, but quickly jerks his hand away with a yelp. “Ow! What the fuck?”

“What’s wrong?” Todoroki touches his face, frowning at Bakugou questioningly. “What happened?”

“Your face scorched my fucking hand.” Bakugou shows the steaming burn to prove it, and Todoroki’s frown deepens.

“I’m sorry, I… I suppose my quirk isn’t working properly. I hadn’t learned to control it at this point. But I don’t feel any—“ Todoroki suddenly sways, catching himself against the wall. He tugs at his collar. “Ah… it’s hot.”

“Oh, fuck.” Bakugou notices the sweat dripping from Todoroki’s red face and swallows down his panic. He’s overheating like a boiling pot. “Shit. Take your clothes off.”

“That’s… i-inappro…” Todoroki’s eyes roll back in his head. Bakugou has to lunge to catch him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” He jerks his hands away from Todoroki’s burning skin, pulling off his borrowed T-shirt in the process. His chest is red-hot, steaming like human skin definitely shouldn’t. “Holy shit. This is no time to panic,” he tells himself, scrambling for his phone. “Have to call Aizawa…”

“Bakugou?” Yaoyorozu is standing a few feet down the hall with Jirou, both sweaty and holding ice-filled water bottles.

“Fuck.” Bakugou quickly stumbles to his feet and yanks ones of the bottles from Jirou’s hand, ripping off the cap. “This better work.” He dumps the ice water over Todoroki, leaping back when hissing steam curls into the air. It does its job, though: Todoroki’s skin returns to a normal color, but he doesn’t wake up.

“What the hell is going on?” Jirou asks, picking up her discarded water bottle. “Wait… Is that—“

“It’s Todoroki,” Bakugou interrupts impatiently, using the skill T-shirt to pat Todoroki’s chest dry. “I don’t have time to explain everything. You can either get lost, or you can help me get this bastard to Aizawa.”

***

“That was a close call. You’re lucky he wasn’t injured.” Recovery Girl pulls the curtains closed around Todoroki’s bed. “It seems as if he was boiling from the inside out. I managed to cool him off enough to avoid damage.”

Before Bakugou can be relieved, Aizawa’s words bite into him. “Are you deaf? I told you not to get him worked up!”

“I didn’t do shit to him!” Bakugou protests, smacking Aizawa’s hands off his collar. “If anything, this is your fault! Isn’t this school’s ‘top priority’ to protect its students? If you’d done your damn job, he’d have been fine from the fucking start!”

“Now, now; everyone please settle down.” Nezu appears from thin air, as annoyingly calm as always. “There’s no use casting blame after the fact. Besides, the situation has now been resolved. The villain willingly told us how to reverse the effects of her quirk. Todoroki should be back to normal in an hour or so.”

Aizawa narrows his eyes, but he keeps his mouth shut. Bakugou lifts his chin with a scoff. “Whatever. I’m out of here.”

“Don’t.” Nezu halts him with a raised paw. “We’ll go. You should stay. Aizawa?”

The two teachers disappear, and Bakugou reluctantly follows Recovery Girl’s advice to sit by Todoroki’s bedside. The whole day has taken the absolute piss out of him. Fucking villains. Fucking careless Half bastard. Bakugou didn’t even realize how worried he really is until Nezu told him they’d found the solution.

Todoroki gets on his nerves, but if anything serious happened to him… Fuck, it’s better not to even think about. He’s fine now. Most importantly, he won’t be stuck as a kid forever. It’s impossible and disgusting to even think about having romantic feelings for an eight-year-old.

“…Katsuki?” Todoroki mumbles. His voice is back to normal, and when he opens his eyes, the left is framed by his blissfully normal, beautiful scar. “Am I back to normal?”

Bakugou attempts to lighten the serious atmosphere. “Dunno. Have you checked down there?”

“Not funny,” Todoroki warns, but the corners of his lips are twitching. “I didn’t realize how much I liked being a teenager until I was an eight-year-old.”

“I’m glad you’re not a fetus anymore,” Bakugou says with an eye-roll. “It would be amazingly awkward to have to break up with you over it.”

They both laugh, and it lessens the knot of tension in Bakugou’s stomach. Things are back to normal. For the time being, at least. He really needs to have a talk with the school about their safety measures… But for now, he’ll enjoy having his full-sized, mega dipshit of a boyfriend back.

“Move over. I’m coming in.”

“This bed is way too small for two people.”

“Shut up. If we can fit on your sister’s couch together, we can fit here.”

They maneuver into a comfortable position, arms and legs intertwined in a safety net of limbs. Todoroki is back to his normal temperature—a perfect mix of hot and cold—and he fits snugly against Bakugou’s side like a puzzle piece, right where he belongs.