#basically i think he suddenly has thoughts that contradict things he has believed said and done and he doesn't know how ti handle it all | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

majaloveschris · 2 years ago

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She really said that? I don't remember this. It's funny how she hates him and his fans, but of course when they provide "rumors" or "gossips," they come in handy so she can have more clicks./:

So I listened to her timeline last night and she is something else. First, her voice is irritating and grating, just no. I couldn’t listen to an entire hour of that.

But second: so she says she was fed information about Evans not dating someone in the business over the spring of 2021, but that’s when Baptista followed him back. She left that follow out. But she said she was getting emails from this woman’s friend talking her all about this “relationship” so that’s how she knew it was true. Not his side, the girls side.

So she went on saying once NYE 1.0 happened, she started to think okay, maybe. Even though no one saw the group split from the other group, she was told he was walking around with an unknown brunette in Vegas, but again, no pics.

Then she said the dust settles and we hear nothing, but she’s being sent all sorts of blinds about him and women in ATL, so she thinks they’re obviously fake, but maybe not, but that’s why she NEVER posted those blinds…🙄

Fast forward to the announcement dropping and the pap walk: LITERALLY the only reason she gives for believing this is real and that she’s now suddenly on team real relationship is the pap walk pictures. According to her, Evans is sooooooooo private. He would NEVEE hire a pap to take pictures of him.

So here’s the thing: we all thought she was getting paid to flip. No. She’s just an idiot who wanted clicks and interactions, and what better way to accomplish that than taking a very beloved actor who she’s admitted she’s never gotten any information from him or his side, and talk about their largest story to date. But also: if she’s being fed anything, it’s from Baptista’s side. She knew an awful lot about her, Justin, and Joana

Thanks for listening and writing it down; I couldn't get myself to do it.

So she basically received emails from that girl's friend, whom he was dating? I guess this was the East Coast girl, the one from Boston, or are we talking about three entirely different people, because this whole thing is confusing. In any case, I'm suspicious of the whole friend thing. I don't know if she actually received any evidence that this whole relationship is true or if she just basically believed a random somebody's email, because everybody can say their friend is dating him. I always found it surreal that she believes almost everything people say to her. She doesn't try to fact-check anything. It's not like people can only tell the truth, and somebody like her with more than a million followers, I think, should be more careful about the things she shares. I understand that she gets a lot of emails, anons, etc., but she should at least check those that are a little bit more serious.

It's so unbelievable that she, who doesn't really care if the things she shares are true or not or even if they don't make any sense, didn't want to share a story about Chris's love life, especially during the 2022 spring and summer, when a lot of people talked about him and Alba.

She knows that this isn't the first time Chris has done a pap walk, right? Or how does she imagine this? The pap was hiding in a random spot in New York, and they happened to walk past him. She is right that Chris would never hire one, because it's probably his team that calls the pap.

He is so private, which she's stated several times now, but somehow she still has information about his love life.

I don't know if she realizes how much bullshit she's been saying or if she simply thinks her followers are so stupid they don't realize that she contradicts herself all the time

#majaloveschris #chris dm bullshit #chris and alba pr #cevans-love

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t1nfoilorigam1 · 1 year ago

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I have some Thoughts about episode 5 s2 of jjk

I think part of the reason jjk is so good is that they show charecters as people with emotions. And they dont hesitate to give us bad endings (i cried when junpei died). Obviously this is most prevalent in Geto's charecters arc. But I'm here to talk about how geto's charecter arc makes so much sense. Like, objectively what he's doing is wrong, but he is so real for it. From a general sense, it seems so sad that so much tragedy happened just because Geto didn't like go to therapy or something, but when you think about it from his perspective, I really can't think about anything else he could've done. And, in a general sense, he caused death because he had experienced death and also to prevent death.

Starting at the beggining, Geto was always super strict in his morals. He was adamant that the strong protect the weak because that is how a humane society should work. Gojo is the exact opposite(- people that are strong are just strong and they should get to do whatever) which is basically their argument in the gym. Back to the main point, the reason geto's ideals switched so suddenly and drastically is because he held himself to such a high moral standard. Gojo, despite going through the same thing (different in the ways that he killed toji (geto bears the feeling of not being able to do anything) and also didn't see riko die) was able to remain fine because his morals didn't contradict what he experienced (also his morals are a little iffy but that's another topic). For Geto, who's whole reason for being a jujustu sorcerer was because he believed that his role was to protect non-sorcerors, this caused a moral crisis. After seeing what the star religious group did, he no longer could fully fundamentally believe that non-sorcerors had an inherent right to be protected.

He has been swallowing curses to protect non-sorcerors, an activity that he hates. If he has another cursed technique, something that dint require him to do something so disgusting, than it might’ve been a little different. But he has been self-sacrificing for a while now, and after the star plasma vessel event, he's now forced to do missions and absorb cursed spirits (by himself) all for non sorcerers. Hes presumably going on a lot of missions, as the show mentioned there being more cursed spirits around that time. He's seeing less of Gojo because he's also going on missions all the time.

Also, he hasn't been able to admit to himself that he no longer values non-sorcerors lives. I mean, that was his whole ideology, and he still holds it as the "correct moral standard" in his mind. Basically, he feels like he's betraying himself by no longer valuing non-sorcerors, and is still trying to make himself adhere to his former morals.

Then, he's visited by Yuki Tsukumo. She provides him with the validation that it's ok to have the thoughts that he's having, and far more importantly, a goal: eradicate curses, by killing all non-sorcerors. Before, when talking to gojo about the star plasma group, he said they couldn't kill them because there was no reason. His life has operated around a reason. His reason for being a jujustu sorcerer was to protect the weak, but now he doesn't agree with that reason. Thats why he latches onto that idea later. He knows it's probably impossible, but that dosent matter so much as having a "moral" reason for his actions.

Then, Haibara dies. On a mission that's fundamental purpose was to protect non-sorcerors, from a curse those same non-sorcerors has created.

Then, the catalyst. He goes on a mission and finds Mimiko and Nanako. They are locked in a cage for being sorcerers, and are being blamed for the actions of a curse, which was created by the non-sorceror villagers who are blaming them and trying to kill them. This is when he decides (also they did a really cool thing w the shadows that I only realized in my rewatch). Basically, he snaps. He no longer can keep telling himself that it's his duty to protect non-sorcerors, and that combined with the idea he already had about killing all non-sorcerors to eliminate curses gave him the perfect reason to kill all of the non-sorcerors in that village. And then he went and killed his parents, to show to himself that he didn't just kill those people because he wanted to, that he had a moral cause for this.

After he does this, he is noticeably a lot happier and calmer. He has a "moral cause" that allows him to kill the people he wants for a reason, but mostly that gives him a cause to work torwards. And also he has daughters now.

Anyways, what I'm trying to say is that Geto is fundamentally wrong, but his actions are completely understandable.

#satosugu #geto suguru #jjk #jjk spoilers #jjk season 2

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baekhvuns · 2 years ago

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Am I Y/N now? 😭 Idk if I should feel honoured or worried

We definitely should know less about each other it's aimed at Harry and lots of others who overshare lmao. Uhmmm, but would Meghan be with someone bigoted and racist in the first place? Let's hope not. Calm down, mate. We get it, she changed you alright

Heeeey I was about 6 or 7 years old when that accident happend and my grandma was next to us chatting with a friend 😭 there's another story with me and that friend, always me who had to fight for her life tho. So we had impromptu football goals at our playground, basically just 4 tall stakes. But they were placed in an inconvenient place, so my friend and I decided to move them... we were 7-8. I was holding the bottom, but my friend accidentally let go of the stake so it crushed my finger and it started bleeding 😭 gross but the nail came off 💀

SM I'M AT YOUR DOOR WTF LEE SOOMAN OPEN UP BITCH. They're gonna ruin SuperM now?! Seriously the backlash will be strong so wtf. And why didn't he come back with WayV then?

I saw bits and pieces of LSF at GDA and some of it was live, like No Celestial! They did well overall, they're fun to watch

Me getting mesmerised by Hwa's vocals unknowingly, sounds about right 🥰 his vocals is really flexible, I love it

Yeah unfortunately idols/trainees parents are also to blame, they're greedy or don't care enough. My friend's sister wanted to become a trainee at 12 and their parents were on board, cause they knew nothing about kpop, but my friend and the rest of the family was like??? That's not happening

Yeosang is joining NCT didn't you know?

Yes his name is Baek Dohwa when I saw it I wheezed and then someone called him Hwa once and I??? Yes it's the eyes, the black haired guy Eunhyuk has Tae's eyes and fluffy hair.

Wet shirt 👀 I think that's the other guy, or maybe I'm forgetting something, but things are escalating there too

But listen this and this. And

I once heard a remix of The Boys and I am the best and ascended 😵 can't find it now, but goddddd I think that person also mixed 4Minute's Crazy and f(x)'s Electric Shock

Why are these men exposed?! They need this

They're probably having fan calls in their car like 💀 I just saw a video from yesterday from a person who's already had over 15 fan calls already tell Hwa "see you tomorrow" seriously and I thought me winning 4 calls last year was too much 🤡

Sometimes I have a thing for Rob, sometimes I don't, Damiano is cool and hot, young Keanu, so beautiful 🥰 I suddenly don't know any white men, pls 😬 I'll have to think harder. Probably some British white actors........ I had a Tom Hardy phase when I was 17-18

The collabs for that show are so random, but if they somehow come true I'll be levitating. Suga and Taeyeon?! I'm sorry, but HOW

I'm stealing that choker wtf Park Seonghwa hand it over! What a neck it's definitely necking ☺

Devastation...

Uhm anyways. I'm looking disrespectfully

Ahhhh finally the first episode is out! (Seonghwa coded) - DV 💖

hi hello!!

Am I Y/N now? 😭 Idk if I should feel honoured or worried /// We definitely should know less about each other it's aimed at Harry and lots of others who overshare lmao. Uhmmm, but would Meghan be with someone bigoted and racist in the first place? Let's hope not. Calm down, mate. We get it, she changed you alright!

bestie first off what did we wake up too, bale and lloris retirement, zidane disrespected, barca back, mourinho brazil, busquets with alnassr, martinez porto’s coach ????

ur the yn! the one who’s always HURT 🔫 u best believe that the pairing with this yn would carry all sorts of bandages in case <33 yEAAAHH i keep seeing his # on twt and theres somethings he’s said that are on point but and time i click it i just never wanna see anyTHING again, the contradictions, getting diana’s spirit to come????? the hair loss reactions 😭😭😭 let’s hope tf not but he is royalty, 2 sides to every story i guess! the palace clearly isn’t in the position to say anything so we only know harry’s side! i doubt they’d say anything too, tho i think that’s good bc once ur in front of the camera its hard to get away from it fbfb i wish the obsession with them is gone atp but this is so funny 😭😭

i am sorry but what the fuck

anon, u need a supervisor 24/7 i AM DBWKDHWK tell us more

SM I'M AT YOUR DOOR WTF LEE SOOMAN OPEN UP BITCH. They're gonna ruin SuperM now?! Seriously the backlash will be strong so wtf. And why didn't he come back with WayV then?

NO SRS IM SORRY BUT what did he contribute, bro has 3 lines in a song 😭😭😭 the backlash will be crazy but a lot of ppl are begging for his return,,, makes me wonder if anything about his scandal was even true with the way twt’s acting! him not being in it would only save his face tbh 😭😭

I saw bits and pieces of LSF at GDA and some of it was live, like No Celestial! They did well overall, they're fun to watch //// Me getting mesmerised by Hwa's vocals unknowingly, sounds about right 🥰 his vocals is really flexible, I love it

tbh lsf’s performance make me forget about the fact theres even lipsync or not going on BC THEIR PERFORMANCES EAT EVERY TIME!!!!! theres this hunger to perform on stage and it SHOWS,, need them to have a concert bc im ready to anti ti ti fragile, wait have u seen this lsf performance?? this is better than any group out there tbh <3 his vocals are so flexible, he fits in every vocal range!

ayo???? AS THE FAMILY SHOULD!! no bc i see like those singing shows whenever it’s on and it’s like catered to younger contestants (7-17 type) and during auditions they be sending 3yo’s???? they haven’t even started talking and they sent them out for singing 😭😭😭😭 YEOSANG IS THE NEW NCT HOLLYWOOD MEMBER??? iM SO SURPRISED! MORE PROMOS FOR HIM! AND TEASERS LIKE THIS

Yes his name is Baek Dohwa when I saw it I wheezed and then someone called him Hwa once and I??? Yes it's the eyes, the black haired guy Eunhyuk has Tae's eyes and fluffy hair. ///// Wet shirt 👀 I think that's the other guy, or maybe I'm forgetting something, but things are escalating there too

But listen this and this. And

i was about to answer the above paragraph and my finger slipped to the atrocity u linked there. the way i froze, anon. what IS GOING ON WHAT ARE U DOING ! ON A MONDAY !!!! UR SENDING THIS AND EXPECT ME TO NOT SCREAM BC THAT IS LITERALLY PARK SEONGGWA DVWNDHWKDHWK IM DBQKHDWKHDWKHDKW

wet shirt. seongjun. and u never told me tHIS WAS HAPPENING IN THE WEBTOON FOR FREE

I once heard a remix of The Boys and I am the best and ascended 😵 can't find it now, but goddddd I think that person also mixed 4Minute's Crazy and f(x)'s Electric Shock

ARE U TALKING ABOUT THIS

omg did u hear all the the boys remix’s 😮‍💨🤲🏻 the t r x sends a nostalgia 🤌🏻🤌🏻 CRAZY AND ELECTRIC SHOCK??? do u rmr this remix and the twiceblackvelvet remix that broke everyone WAIT HOLDON HAVE U WATCHED THOSE MULTIFANDOM EDITS this one 🤚🏻 what an era tbh

Why are these men exposed?! They need this

YEAH COVER THEM UP !!!!! COVER THEM UP RN 🔫🔫🔫 at least we get moments like this 😭😭 bro is tIRED,, 😭😭😭 i wish they’d do this once in a while, i want hwa to do this so bad

i watched harry potter again and mr pattinson had me BY THE NECK !!!! damiano is so very attractive, he sometimes looks like princess diana 😭😭😭 i would’ve thought that tom hiddleston would have been in ur list for sure BUT TOM HARDY?? THATS A NEW 👀👀 i would add the chat noir from miraculous ladybug too tbh <3

The collabs for that show are so random, but if they somehow come true I'll be levitating. Suga and Taeyeon?! I'm sorry, but HOW

no ur right, it’s so random,, but pairing taeyeon and suga would probably be a another iu and suga type of music tbh fbwnfh

I'm stealing that choker wtf Park Seonghwa hand it over! What a neck it's definitely necking ☺ /// Devastation... /// Uhm anyways. I'm looking disrespectfully /// Ahhhh finally the first episode is out! (Seonghwa coded) - DV 💖

HE IS SO PRETTY IN THAT NECKLACE bro is so fine, the blond, the blue outfit and the sparkly necklace 😩😩😩 my new religion

this man is crazy and i would like every inch of him and this is the same guy

STOP THE FIRST EP LOOKS SO GOOD STOP IT SHKWFHWKHDKW

i also want to say what us wRONG WITH AUSTRALIA????? I WAS SENT A VIDEO OF A SNAKE, BLACK SKINNY SNAKE IN MY FAMILYS HOUSE AND THEYRE NOT EVEN PANICKING????? FHWKHDKW HOW IS UR FRIEND LIVING THERE????????????£|€\¥|!£]

anon, what the hell

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

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fluffywolverine · 3 years ago

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so season 6 of lucifer came out.

there were some things that i liked, but generally i hated it. i believe that was SUCH. BAD. WRITING and it left me frustrated. so i decided to write down all things that pissed me off and sometimes i try to fix this by giving other ideas that – in my opinion – would have made the story better. Check my points out and feel free to add your points of view. without further ado: let’s talk.

- imma start with the big one – fucking time travel. ok I generally hate this trope in the media, because it’s complicated and often leads to some logical mistakes – and they happened here. so rory time travels because of her anger which was caused… by her anger?? i think this was unnecessary. it also brings trouble with this whole free will vs. fate discourse. lucifer says, that he chooses free will… but at the same time he goes the path of his fate. he disappears from rory’s life, because he HAS TO in order of the events of the season to happen. just because he chose to do it, doesn’t mean it’s free will.

- lucifer becomes the very thing he desperately didn’t want to become. “bUt It WaS fOr ThE gReAtEr GoOd” screw this bullshit, if writers wanted to make it better, they could have easily do so. they could have altered the rules of time travel so that his choice of staying could have resulted in rory disappearing. yes, that would have been heart-breaking, but it would have been a great lesson for lucifer, that he can’t make the same mistakes his father did.

- chloe and Lucifer get a child without even talking about it. “bUt MaYbE tHeY tAlKeD aBoUt It We JuSt DiDn’T sEe It” you may say. but the point of writing anything - whether it’s a book or a script – is to show any thing that matters. and talking about having kids is one of the most things any couple should do. also not every couple needs to have kids and forcing deckerstar to have it feels so far-fetched. this thread was very unnecessary.

- rory herself is a big problem. to begin with – she wanted to KILL her FATHER. i get her frustration, but commiting a murder?? just because he wasn’t there for her?? I would have thought that chloe taught her better, taught her that, like, killing people is bad. turns out she did not. secondly… she just isn’t necessary here. i elaborate later so in conclusion – her thread could be altered with michael’s and it would have made much more sense. i also don’t like the actress (why was she blinking so much??) so i certainly didn’t help.

- of course ella has to end up with a boyfriend. because earlier she always ended up with “bad boys” and now, without any help, she is just able to have a healthy relationship! yay! for me this creates a toxic view, that in order to be happy one HAS TO be in a relationship, because being alone is aLwAyS bAd. well, it’s not.

- i also have troubles with lucifer starting up a foundation for her. firstly, he didn’t ask her. secondly it – AGAIN – shows, that anything good ella got, was because of another man. firstly because of her relationship with carol, secondly because of lucifer’s idea. it could have been so easily altered! there could have been a scene of a conversation e.g. with amenadiel where she expressed a will to do better and be better for someone (given that she sees a lot of dark in herself). amenadiel could have then told her, that she is an inspiration and that it is her biggest strength. that could have been where ella came up with an idea to start a foundation blah blah – it’s just a rough idea but I believe that written well, it could have been so much better;

- and the last thing about ella – of course she had to find out about celestial stuff because sHe WaS tHe OnLy OnE rEmAiNiNg. umm what about trixie? i'll come back to her later. ella was portrayed as the only one believing in god and having her seeing that he really exists ruins the concept of faith. it’s not about knowing something exists, it’s about believing in it.

- WHERE THE FUCK IS MICHAEL. i must admit that i loved this character AND I CAN’T STAND HOW AWFULLY HE WAS TREATED HERE. so at the end of season 5 lucifer says “everyone deserves a second chance, even you michael". and what does he do then? COMMANDS HIS TWIN TO CLEAR THE FLOOR IN HELL. yes, i agree that michael should have been punished for his rebellion plan, but… he already has his wing cut off. now he’s stuck in hell, with no way out and is he supposed to learn his lesson? this is cruel. instead of this the entire season could have been centred on him – his journey to self-acceptance, learning how manipulating someone is toxic and starting to realise how to be a better person. at the end he could have become god (because amenadiel is such an obvious choice), which would create a beautiful connection – michael in heaven and his twin in hell.

- lucifer doesn’t feel like being god and that’s cool. damn. people died for him to win this place and he’s like “actually you know guys i’m not the right person bye”. while i believe that anyone should step out if they have a reason, but at the same time lucifer should have faced any consequences of his decisions. falling frog and kool aid in the river are not enough.

- adam’s plot feels just quickly sketched, not actually written. i really appreciate this take on toxic masculinity but it all felt too fast-paced. it’s good that they show this idea of “strong and not-showing-any-feelings man” kind of attitude, but it is impossible for ANYONE (especially The ManTM) to change their mind in a matter of a few days. it takes weeks, months, years even, especially given that adam is like a gazillion years old, he should have especially taken a long time to process this.

- carol is just too pure to exist. he’s also one of the most boring, plain and one-dimensional character i’ve ever seen. i feel like they gave him a problem with alcohol because the writers were like “hmmmmm he has to have some weakness. LET’S MAKE HIM AN ALCOHOLIC”. we don’t see any signs of his everyday struggle, why did he fell into this problem, how did struggle. it just feels like a dull plot device to show that he has flaws. oh and also he’s so pure that he doesn’t mind ella BREAKING INTO HIS HOUSE. acceptance should have boundaries and violating someone’s personal space isn’t right.

- why did they forget about trixie again? yes, i know that scarlett estevez had another project but this does not justify the bad writing. the girl lost her father and we only see her crying once because of that. no signs of this affecting her everyday life, not showing any consequences of her relationships with other people, not glimpse of any change in her behaviour. oh and also she loses lucifer too because time travel! great idea, writers! losing another close to her person would have been soooooo good for her psychic for sure.

- i also hate the idea that suddenly rory becomes the only child they care for. where is trixie when they spend their day on the beach? where is she when her mother dies? did writers forget about her as well as they did about michael?

- amenadiel being a police officer is… problematic. i was looking forward to this thread, i was kinda scared too and it turned out… meh. i’m white and not American, so this of course does not involve me at all, but i felt like this was not enough. harris basically said that there is nothing they can do to make it better for black folks. even though chloe and amenadiel want to make everything more just, we don’t actually see any change. the only thing is that harris becomes a detective (right? i’m not sure if i understood it correctly, so correct me if i’m wrong, please) which is a total contradiction of what she said before. suddenly she does not have to protect people anymore?

- in season 5 they stated that heaven and hell need to be fixed, as the system is unfair and unjust. at the end we don’t see any change, the only thing that is different is lucifer helping damned souls. it doesn’t help at all! these people still go to hell, they still suffer and there’s nothing that changed here! plus there is also this thing, that a sociopath who murdered people in cold blood goes to heaven (because he does not feel any guilt) and a person abused by her parents/partner/whoever goes to hell (because have been manipulated to feel guilt).

- dan making amends with trixie while… there wasn’t really anything to make amends about. like, most of the parents make mistakes while upbringing their children, but does this make them unworthy of heaven? i would have preferred dan to slowly regain his self-consciousness, how he positively affected the lives of people around him and by doing so – through conversations or maybe reliving some of the memories, he could have proved to himself that he is worthy of love and redemption.

phew, what a ride. i really liked dan being reunited with charlotte (it went just as i imagined) and mazeve dynamics. i even felt like they are finally a real life relationship – with people hurting each other by not understanding each other, but then talking and seeing other’s perspective. generally though, i’m very disappointed.

sorry for any mistakes, lacking commas etc. writing a text this long in not my native language was not easy.

#lucifer #lucifer netflix #lucifer spoilers #lucifer season 6

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linkspooky · 4 years ago

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Touya is Dead, Dabi is Here.

Dabi is the foil to Endeavor. His villainous foil. However, not everything is about Endeavor. Let’s shove him to the side for a second. Dabi is also the villainous foil to himself, in a stranget twist and turn of events. Dabi has a villain persona that he plays up, he’s trying to show everyone that he’s the monster created by Endeavor’s monstrous actions, but I think he’s also playing himself as the opposite of Touya, the villainous foil to Touya’s once heroic ambitions. Touya was supposed to die, but Touya lived. Now, Dabi is trying to destroy everything Touya is, by embodying the opposite of everything Touya was.

1. The Child Who Didn’t Get Saved

Touya’s remembered in a certain way by his family members. Endeavor doesn’t even seem to pity the child who died on his watch, so much as he pities himself. He pities the fact that he didn’t get to raise his son up into a successor. When he sees the scarred up Dabi still alive in front of him, he doesn’t feel happiness that his long dead son is alive, or even pity for the monster covered in burns.

His first thought is disappointment, that Dabi didn’t grow up into what he wanted him to be. Natsu remembers the crying child that always clung to him, but he probably has the most realistic view of his brother. Someone who was suffering under his father, and someone whose pain shouldn’t be forgiven or swept under the rug. Whereas Fuyumi and Shoto who were both less close to Touya, don’t even seem to know how to talk about him, or how to feel.

Touya is in the eyes of others around him, either a sad and tragic case. A crying child in need of saving who unfortanately did not get saved. Or he’s just not talked about at all. I’m not going to talk about Shoto and Fuyumi because of course they don’t know how to feel about the death of their own brother, and their mom who they’ve been seperated from for a decorated they’re coming to terms with all that slowly but... not only did society as a whole forget about Touya but, Endeavor too. He doesn’t really see Touya. He just sees an unfortanate lost child. He sees a son who he wants to come home. Touya died so young, and so suddenly that his feelings aren’t really recognized. Nobody really knows Touya, and the Touya they all understand is the sad child he used to be. The sad, pitiful, tragic, child.

And is it any wonder that Touya doesn’t want to be this person anymore? That Dabi denies being this person? If all Touya used to be was a sad child, constantly crying, who was never good enough no matter how hard he tried. Then wouldn’t it make sense that Dabi wouldn’t want to be this person anymore?

It’s painful being Touya. Touya is vulnerable, a child who couldn’t do anything about his situation. A child who tried so hard he ended up burning himself. Not only is Touya vulnerable, he’s frail, weak, all the things Dabi doesn’t want to be and all the things his father found worthless. Touya has flames stronger than anyone, but a weak constitution to go along with it, so much so he always ends up hurting himself with his own fire. It’s pretty obvious to see that Dabi is in pain, everyone else around him except for Dabi himself seems to notice it. He’s covered in burn wounds at all times, he’s literally constantly smoking, and just barely stitched together. Yet, Dabi denies being in pain, and through doing that, he denies himself.

2. That Child Grew Up Into An Asshole

Denial is a coping mecahnism. Refusing to acknowledge that something is wrong is a way of coping with emotional conflict, stress, painful thoughts, threatening information and anxiety. Rather than simply being vulnerable, it’s sometimes easier to deny that you are ever vulnerable atall. Especially for people like Dabi who spent long periods in their childhood feeling helpless and week.

From the moment a baby comes into the world, forming attachments to parents or other caregivers is critical to a child’s emotional, physical and psychological development. For an infant, having a gentle and responsive caregiver provides the nurturing a child needs to grow into a healthy adult. A cared for child develops self-esteem, feels secure in exploring the world around him or her and has a strong foundation for understanding how to build healthy relationships later in life.

But if those earliest relationships break down, the child may experience what is known as abandonment or neglect trauma.

One way of coping with this trauma is to be entirely self sufficient. To basically close up, never need to rely on other people ever, and therefore never open up. Basically, what Dabi denies more than anything else is his vulnerability, even though it’s obvious he’s in pain.

Vulnerability, after all is the reason he got abandoned. Touya was tossed to the side because he was too weak. Therefore, in an effort to be strong Dabi denies feeling any pain at all, and in the process shuts out his other feelings. He also denies anything, his connection to his family, any feelings of guilt or remorse he might have.

Self-denail, and self-abuse, it’s the same reason kids from bad homes end up acting irresponsibly and abusing drugs, it’s all a fancy way to hurt yourself.

If overthinking about things causes him pain, causes him to break Dabi’s solution is to simply not think about things. If being Touya is too painful for him, then Dabi chooses not to be a person and plays up the monster.

It’s almost like Dabi and Touya are two separate people stitched sloppily together, but they’re coming apart slowly at the seams. Dabi pretends to be a remorseless villain when facing off with Endeavor, but then in front of the crowds when he’s begging for sympathy he shows off all of his burns, sits politely, and presents a character that is much more human making his case that he killed innocent people but he did so with reason, for a good cause. While, the same Dabi instead of Endaevor seems to just want to burn everything for the fun of it. The point being that, Dabi contradicts himself a lot. He argues with himself.

It’s because Dabi is putting on deliberate acts. He’s changing himself based on the audience. It’s just that he’s also not as good of an actor as he thinks he is. However the performance seems to be pretty consistent at least for the most part, he wants everyone to regret what Touya became because of Endeavor’s abuse so he purposefully makes himself into the opposite of everything Touya was. Touya wanted to be a hero to carry on his father’s legacy, Dabi is a villain dedicated to completely destroying his father’s reputation and leading him to ruin.

Touya was known for being particularly close to Natsuo, not only playing with him all the time, but confiding in him. Touya must have been a good big brother to Natsuo if Natsuo misses him so much. Yet, Dabi acts like Natsuo is nothing special, just another casualty in his revenge on Endeavor.

Touya was someone always working hard to earn Endeavor’s attention and please him. Dabi seems to only want to bring about Endeavor’s ruin and think of ways of hurting him. There’s a certain irony in Dabi being so laser focused on Endeavor, because once again you reap what you sow. Endeavor wanted to raise his child to exist solely for his purpose, to carry on his legacy, to center everything around Endeavor’s needs rather than to care for another living human being with needs of his own and that’s what he got - someone who is singularly laser focused and obsessed with bringing him down. Even if Touya is still obsessed with only Endeavor to the point of forgetting the rest of his family, that’s literally just a symptom, a side effect of child abuse, of Endeavor raising Touya with the expectation that he had to please him.

Touya was a kid who is always crying, and Dabi seems to have no feelings at all. Once again, always, always he presents himself as the opposite of everything that Touya was and wanted to be.

Dabi denies that he is Touya, and therefore denies that he is in pain.

He pulls his brother close, and hugs him, and then does the opposite of what a big brother is supposed and hurts his younger brother instead of protecting him.

It’s not just Dabi being the opposite of Touya, it’s almost like he’s doing everything he can, to burn up and riun Touya’s memory. To deny that any part of him ever was Touya.

Dabi is in denial, but also I think some part of Dabi is aware of his denial. Like I said, he contradicts himself. He says that these are Endeavros’ flames, then just as easily he says “no duh, it’s obvious I’m not Endeavor.”

I think Dabi realizes what he is doing, it’s just at the moment he believes he has to do this. It’s the only way. Whatever, Dabi is hoping to achieve, the radical reform of society, the destruciton of the hero system, it’s more important the feelings of his family, and more important than his own feelings.

However, if those feelings are there it means Dabi isn’t without hope. There’s still a human side to Dabi. Dabi is still Touya, the same way Shigaraki is same Tenko. Their child selves died, but they never did die. Dabi is trying to be pure evil, but parts of him are still good he’s just suppressing himself.

I think what Dabi needs to realize is that his hurt feelings, his feelings of vulnerability, are just as important as the strength he fights with. He needs both parts of himself in order to live on, weak little Touya and villainous Dabi. I don’t think Dabi will turn into a 100% good person, but as for character development the same way that Shoto is learning to reconcile his two disparagent sides, his ice and his flames. I hope that Dabi learns that he’s still Touya, while being Dabi at the same time. He’s not a villain, he’s someone capable of being both good and bad. It’s only that way he can learn to live on as Touya, rather than hoping to die and drag his father to hell with him as Dabi.

#mha meta #touya todoroki #todoroki touya #dabi #lov meta #league of villains meta #my hero academia #my hero academia meta

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thotinshield · 3 years ago

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Danny’s Bagginshield Fic Recs (2021)

I haven’t done a fic rec in literal years, and I keep meaning to, but then I... don’t. This is a massive list - so I will put it under a read more to save your dashes.

Modern AUs

A Remover of Obstacles by MistakenMagic

"Dis often chided her older brother for being a misanthropist. She did it so often it had become a term of endearment. It was true that Thorin struggled with people; he struggled to form and maintain relationships. Dr. Grey had diagnosed him with this and Thorin hadn’t the heart to tell him this wasn’t a symptom of his PTSD, it was a symptom of his personality. He exercised a sense of apathy with almost everyone he met… But Bilbo was different. Thorin actually found himself wanting to know more about him."

(Note: This fic deals with a lot of mental health stuff, panic attacks, etc, so please please mind the tags.)

By Request by HildyJ

As a musician, Thorin's life can be summed up in tempos. For instance, the concerto he's perfoming on Friday is Allegro - quick and bright, followed by Andantino - slightly slow, and then back to Allegro again.

On the other hand, his relationship with his cute neighbour? Larghissimo - very, very slow.

Stepping Stones by misplacedkisses

It feels like it's fate Thorin's trying to resist, his destiny, his bloodline.

Fresh out of inpatient, Thorin's struck with the urge and maybe it's fate (or therapy) that has him stumbling into a late-night cafe instead. It may be the start of a new life.

Write Me Down Easy by lucyraebrown

Bilbo Baggins, a simple man with a wish for something more than his life teaching high school English, is obsessed with a famous author by the pen-name Oakenshield. Although he knows the future is dim for his chances of finding out about the man behind his favorite book, it's reassuring to know someone has the same thoughts about the world.

Fix-its

I'll Die to Care for You by thehufflepuffhobbit

His gaze landed on Mahal's eyes once more. "You did your best, Thorin." It was tempting to look away; he wanted to deny that with everything he had. It certainly didn't feel as though falling into Gold Sickness and then dying was doing his best. Mahal smirked, as though he knew Thorin's desire to contradict him, and pinched his cheek before walking over to a table. "Aye, I didn't think you would believe me. I'm not lying, it certainly could have gone better. More according to my plan, but I know you really did try."

"Your plan?" He didn't know if he should ask, really. Knowing that his Maker had set a course for him, he didn't want to think about the ways he had done everything wrong. There were too many examples of mistakes in his long life, too many opportunities that he had missed that had probably been planned for him from the beginning.

Or:

Mahal feels like Thorin fucked up his legacy and gives him a do over.

Roses of Iron by Porphyrios

Two years after Bilbo returned from his adventures, he's made his peace with being back in the Shire. He still wonders what might have happened if things were different, but figures all that is behind him now. A mysterious visitor turns out to be someone he never thought he'd see again, and he's shocked by the news he hears.

Beside Myself by bliboboggins

"What are you doing? Just who do you think you are?" Startled, Bilbo turned around slowly. And there, in a familiar patchwork dressing gown, brandishing a fire poker wildly about, was... Bilbo.

i wouldn't have danced like that with any but you by Percyjacksonfan3

Thorin has survived the Battle of the Five Armies but his relationship with Bilbo is uncertain and precarious, especially in the newly reclaimed kingdom of Erebor. With Kíli set to marry Tauriel, and the Dwarves of Erebor still holding prejudice against outside races, Thorin must choose between his nephew's happiness or his own.

Though he believes sending Bilbo back to the Shire is for the good of everyone, he and the rest of Erebor are thrown into turmoil when 5 years later his nephews secretly plot to bring Bilbo back. Coming face-to-face with Bilbo again makes it impossible for Thorin to stay apart from him any longer- but is Bilbo still willing to be with Thorin once more after he broke both of their hearts?

A Matter of Payment by heartshapeddog

"And Thorin rose from the little table, keeping Bilbo’s fingers crushed gently in his own, and went down to his knee before him. Bilbo was struck with the likelihood that no creature greater than a farm-dog had lowered its head before a Hobbit since the birth of Eä until this very moment. He looked down, fascinated, at the crown of Thorin’s head, bare of royal circlet, and felt at once humbled and strong.

“I swear it,” Thorin said, and Bilbo thought of the vows from Elven history, of the type which followed the oathkeeper to the ends of Arda as a deep and binding magic. Then, he took Bilbo’s knuckles up to his lips. The rasp of his beard and his soft mouth were shocking in their immediacy and contrast. Bilbo could not help his racing heart."

Feet that Wander Have Gone by WednesdaysDaughter

“Run away with me.”

Bilbo turns to see who would say such a cowardly thing only to realize it was his own traitorous mouth which has run away with his heart: They’re already down the mountain and past Mirkwood by the time he realizes no one has objected.

“What a delightful solution my dear boy,” says Gandalf who looks to the east where the eagles are skimming the horizon.

Other AUs

between synapses and circuits by MistakenMagic

Different diagnostic results slowly trickled through and Thorin swiped them all to different corners of the screen depending on their relevance and evidence of abnormality. He paused when a particular chart appeared and smiled to himself.

“What?” Bilbo murmured, sounding genuinely worried.

“Your heterochromia,” Thorin explained, meeting Bilbo’s green and blue gaze. “The irregular algorithm that causes it has been running for almost half a century.”

“Most mechatronics offer to fix it for me,” Bilbo said, looking away, seeming suddenly self-conscious.

“Then they’re idiots.”

(Note: I just love MistakenMagic’s works. That’s all. This one is good and she writes angst so so well.)

past one hundred thousand miles (feeling very still) by childishinquiry

Commander Thorin Oakenshield is the leader of the first Mars mission, Project Golden Eagle, with twelve crewmen. Back on Earth, Specialist Bilbo Baggins is their communications specialist. Making history is easy; it's much harder to deal with falling in love with the person on the other end of the signal.

Hallowbit by batherik

As simple pawn shop owner in the human world, Bilbo isn’t all that thrilled to find himself lost in Thorin’s magical undead kingdom. Lured there by an old man dressed in grey, who turned out to be a wizard, Bilbo is charged with doing a job no one wants to do: fetch the King’s head from the corn maze. The King often loses his head when his temper boils over.

In the House of a Skinchanger by Bardic

Thorin and Company have finally reached a safe house after a few crazy weeks on the road. After three days of goblins, orcs, and a massive bear that's chased them into the home of one of Gandalf's acquaintances the Company is quite exhausted and quite tired of surprises. Unfortunately for them, or fortunately there is another staying there.

Master Baggins is not who the Company expected to find, especially when he claims to be one of the only outsiders Durin allowed a title and a rank to. Although that's the least surprising thing about him.

Thorin makes some discoveries and has some observations.

Basically an AU where Bilbo is a skinchanger and the Company meet him at Beorn's on accident.

It Runs In The Family by Imagined

At first, Bilbo is very glad to hear of the new alliance between Erebor and the Shire. He is even more excited when he learns that some of his family members are coming to the Lonely Mountain to discuss the details.

That is, until the dwarves (and Thorin, who is decidedly not and never shall be his) start getting along a little too well with one of his more adventurous cousins, and Bilbo starts doubting about his place.

#bagginshield #fic recs #fic rec list #okay these aren't all my favorite fics but to do that would take days so - take these

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itsclydebitches · 4 years ago

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so ironwood was confirmed to be dead by Miles in a $42 cameo session, where the person who bought it had asked for "comforting words to soothe our anguished souls" bc she was an ironwood fan and wanted a pick-me-up after that devastating finale. miles' response was to essentially mock his fans (it really sounded like that, especially since he ended with "thank you jimmy, may you rest in pieces, crushed beneath the weight of the kingdom you tried so hard to hold up above your head."

apparently the VA, jason rose, confirmed it in DMs w the same fan who sent in the cameo ask. so like, quite apart from how rude and disrespectful it was of miles to make a mockery of james in a cameo where he'd been specifically asked for comforting words regarding the character, ngl but i think that if you have to confirm a MAJOR CHARACTER is dead outside of canon bc you failed to actually show it on screen.....you've failed as a writer. and also that kind of thing shouldn't be confirmed in an expensive and exclusive interview lmao like how hard would it have been to just talk about good aspects to james' character instead of calling him a dickbag and saying 'don't do a genocide, guys!!'

it reeks of unprofessionalism and also it just makes everything surrounding ironwood's character arc even worse since apparently 'his fate was sealed' from the moment he was introduced to the show.

Me, who received the first Moderna shot yesterday (🎉 🎉 🎉 ): Ugh I feel too crappy to answer asks today

Me, upon hearing this news: You know, I have suddenly found an untapped source of energy

Okay, all joking aside, I watched the vid and it’s definitely a lot. I don’t have any information about the request itself except for what Miles mentions in the recording, so I can’t speak to what the fan may have been looking for outside of that, but some highlights include:

“This is for the filth in my degenerate discord server” - Yeah, that’s how a lot of us (fans) talk about ourselves. It sounds like someone who really enjoys Ironwood and makes joking, self-deprecating comments about their love of a character. That’s familiar to me and speaks to the expectation that they hoped for something other than what they got. At least, if I’d sent in a request like that I wouldn’t be happy with the vid, but that’s obviously my own perspective and not this fan’s. I’d be very curious to know their own thoughts though...

“Sometimes a character we like doesn’t make it, does something we don’t agree with... or both!” - That is indeed how characters work! The real question is whether their death/actions make sense within the story, which is not addressed here. Many fans who enjoyed Ironwood don’t have a problem with him dying or turning into a villain — I’ve been honest about my acceptance of either/both, regardless of personal preference, provided it was written well — and that was always the issue. Not what happened to Ironwood, but how it happened.

“James Ironwood’s fate was sealed the moment his character was conceived many years ago.” - Personally, I don’t believe this. RT makes a lot of grand, sweeping statements about what’s been planned “for years” or “since the beginning” and too often we’re faced with writing that directly contradicts that. Though it’s unlikely we’ll ever know the truth, neither option paints the writing team in a good light. Either they’re straight up lying about what’s been planned (or twisting tossed out possibilities into assurances after the fact. For example, someone once suggested Ironwood might become a villain somehow at some point and now that’s presented as, ‘We’ve deliberately been working towards this specific ending for years’), or they’re being truthful and just... can’t write what they want to write. It doesn’t sound good when a writer says, ‘I’ve planned this the whole time’ and a good chunk of the fandom responds, ‘Then why couldn’t we see that planning this whole time?’

“When James was introduced we intentionally made him look like kind of a big dickbag, but then we realized that dickbag had a heart and was also half metal, and that was pretty cool!” - I don’t even know what to make of this. I’ve deconstructed his introduction before, but to summarize here, he’s presented as no more of a “dickbag” than Ozpin who may not be doing enough to protect the people, Winter who allowed herself to get taunted into a fight on campus, or Qrow who deliberately started that fight while drunk. Glynda is the only one who is arguably innocent here. The implication seems to be that obviously Ironwood became a villain because “we intentionally made him look like kind of a big dickbag” but then... does that mean Qrow will become a villain too someday??

The comments about them realizing he had a heart and was half metal just speak to that lack of planning. No, you obviously didn’t plan this downfall from the start if you “realized” something as basic as him caring for others partway through writing him and then allowed that care to drive his character for so long that the decent into villainy read as OOC, rather than inevitable. You obviously weren’t writing him with a backstory that influenced his character — of which his semblance is a major part — if you “realized” he was half-metal... whenever that happened. The fact that we never saw that backstory, or the semblance on screen, or returned to his half-metal nature outside of a ‘That’s coding for evilness’ theme again speaks to the fact that either a) none of this was actually planned or b) the execution is seriously lacking here.

“Let us all take a moment to thank General James Ironwood for his service to the Kingdom of Atlas, but... at the end of the day, don’t do a genocide [laughs]” - I’m having trouble articulating why I dislike this. I’m really too tired to be unpacking this right now (lol), but it has something to do with — as you say, anon — that mocking tone. Something else to do with the surge of purity culture in recent years. The tone feels like it’s tied up in an unsaid, ‘You like the character who tried to commit genocide?’ accusation when, you know, he’s a fictional character. People can like characters who do bad things. More significantly, he’s a fictional character Miles wrote. There’s something particularly distasteful about writers who feel like they’re laughing at fans for liking something when they created the thing with the intent that we would like it. And many did. So they gave attention, time, money, passion, etc. to the work and then when that part of the work finished, the creator appears to make light of that investment? Idk, I’m speaking about more than just this one line — the tone of the vid as a whole, really — but it feels much less like “You enjoy Ironwood! 😄” and more “You enjoy Ironwood... 😬” Like yeah, fans enjoyed the character that you wanted them to enjoy who you wrote to have a heart and then suddenly commit genocide instead. There’s definitely nothing complicated in all that.

“Thank you, Jimmy. May you rest in pieces crushed beneath the weight of the kingdom you tried so hard to hold above your head. Amen.” - All of the above x2 with the added issue that this was never shown on screen. Miles presents Ironwood’s arc like this seven year long plan when in fact they couldn’t even manage the basic move of telling the audience what happened to the character in his final hour. The fact that a fan had to pay to find out whether Ironwood is dead is not a gold star for the writing.

Every time the RWBY crew speaks about the story in supplementary material the canon itself gets worse. Hyping Clover/Qrow on social media pushes the canon closer to queerbaiting. We’re way closer to that with them hyping Blake/Yang. Long ago comments about Ozpin’s cane suddenly make Volume 8 a retcon. A Q&A about Ironwood’s semblance makes his arc a thousand times more confusing about how we’re supposed to read his character — to name just a few. Now this. When a friend first told me this info had dropped I thought, “Thank god. He’s not coming back then. I don’t want them writing Ironwood’s character anymore,” but really... can we believe anything the crew says? “Crushed beneath the weight of his kingdom” doesn’t mean Ironwood won’t show up in Volume 9 if it’s a spirit world type adventure. It doesn’t mean he won’t show up three years from now with even more metal in his body and a, “We said he was crushed, not that he was dead ;)” explanation. Hell, it doesn’t even mean he won’t show up with no explanation at all because, as established, what’s said in supplementary works and what happens on screen are two entirely separate things. Iffy as the vid may come across to those who did like Ironwood, I was initially happy that it at least gave us some closure... but now I’m not even sure about that.

#rwby #rwde #mymetas #Anonymous

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handonhaven · 3 years ago

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I really don’t get why no one is talking about the fact that they basically contradicted all of Hope’s words and actions throughout season 3 in 4x03, in regards to Landon. The writers really expect me to believe that Hope Mikaelson, the one who loves Landon more than anything, who fought for him all throughout season 3, who has been willing to do anything to save him and get him back, the one who said: whatever it takes to get Landon back, we’re un-dooming things, Landon would never want me to give up on him, for once in my life I’m not gonna sacrifice what I love, I’m not ready to let him go, I’m gonna find the real him, I’m not gonna stop until I’ve exhausted every possibility, moving on isn’t the answer finding Landon is, I’m not abandoning him again, if you disappeared tomorrow I’d do it all over again, screw fate, the one person I can’t bring myself to fight, I went through hell to find you and I would do it all over again if I needed to, etc. would then decide to sacrifice Landon, and make that decision within a few hours tops, with little to no struggle or resistance. I mean, wow. They really went against all of those statements in just one single episode (which I had also thought were intended to be foreshadowing as well, that we would see come full circle exactly right now with all that’s happening?). They had Hope go from all of that, and from being determined to get Malivore out of Landon, to deciding to sacrifice him in less than 24 hours. They couldn’t even build up to her making that decision gradually. At least they’ve had her contemplating becoming the tribrid since 3x15, and had been building up to that idea even before that. Yet they literally have her abruptly being willing to lose Landon in just one episode after having an entire season of her fighting against that. They had her shift her mindset regarding Landon completely. Incredible. I remember how some fans had worried they were gonna do this and throw all that they had established in season 3 out the window, but I had truly thought they never would... but that’s exactly what they did.

And this happened after making only one attempt to save Landon from Malivore, which could have been a success if only Malivore hadn’t known. So why not maybe, idk, try again?? I think one of the main issues with all of this is the lack of effort. Since when would Hope give in this easily without doing everything she could to try and save Landon? She wouldn’t even consider him dying before doing all she could do. I understand that they have to stop Malivore as quickly as possible now that he’s turning people into monsters. But why not just find Malivore first, like they’re gonna have to do anyway, which even Kaleb was able to do all on his own, and just shoot him and knock him out again like Alaric did in 3x16, and put him back in the cage? That would stop him from hurting more people. And Hope was able to pull the monster/Malivore mud out of Clarke just the day before, why can’t she do that with the people Malivore has transformed? And then go back to trying to find a way to get Malivore out of Landon? They literally just did this as a way to rush Hope into becoming the tribrid because they obviously ran out of time after wasting so much of season 3 on filler episodes.

But then for her to also suddenly decide to let go of Landon on top of becoming the tribrid? Which they clearly did as a way to force Hope to choose between Landon and other people again and to force her to let go of Landon for her own “growth” and as a way to further show her selflessness. Which I do not agree with at all. We already know how selfless Hope is. Is her choosing to become the tribrid not enough of a sacrifice already? Why add her sacrificing Landon on top of that? I will never understand why they feel the need to keep making Hope choose between Landon and others. This has been happening since season 2 and it never ends. We went from her feeling like she couldn’t choose Landon or her own happiness in season 2, to then deciding to finally choose Landon and her own happiness in season 3, and now (after her friends gaslighted her and guilt-tripped her for ever prioritizing Landon) we’re back to where we started. Nothing has changed. They’ve just pushed it even further with her having to sacrifice even more. It feels as if, because Klaus was a villain, Hope has to keep being tested and has to give up everything in order to prove that she’s better than her father (and her family), when she’s already proven it. And yet they keep doing this to her and Landon, which is sick. They want to make her as selfless as she can possibly be, at her own expense and Landon’s expense.

And if they’ve already done this for as long as they have, when will it end? It’s not as if they’re resolving this continuous dilemma. They just keep putting Hope in these situations, and they are all no-win situations for Hope. She will never be happy as long as they keep doing this to her. Because she can either save Landon and get blamed for not putting others first, possibly causing others to die and deal with that guilt, or she can save others and let Landon die, therefore losing him and her own happiness, while also dealing with that guilt too. She can’t win. And another thing is the fact that she shouldn’t have to make these choices because it shouldn’t even be necessary. This sort of thing wasn’t always happening on TVD/TO, especially not to just one character. Why? Because those characters actually worked together and there was a team effort and they didn’t just pick and choose all the time. One of the many differences between TVD/TO and Legacies is that in Legacies, the characters will sit around talking about who to save, while the TVD/TO characters would actively be working to figure out how to save everyone they could. They weren’t constantly making the choices that Hope is forced to make. Why the writers are obsessed with this “greater good” thing rather than just allowing the other characters to do their part and help Hope and have everyone making efforts to get everyone out alive is beyond me.

And this is also so damaging to both Hope and Landon. For Hope, she keeps being put in this horribly difficult position where she has to make these decisions and feels like she can never prioritize who she loves or her own happiness. And the show will preach about healthy relationships and having a balance between a romantic relationship and friendships, and being sure to be there for your friends, but it goes both ways. You can’t have Hope always prioritizing her friends and other people and never being allowed to prioritize Landon. That’s not healthy for their relationship either, look at what it’s done to both of them so far. If Hope hadn’t been discouraged from prioritizing Landon in the beginning, there’s a good chance none of this would be happening. And if they’re gonna keep creating these scenarios where Hope has to choose, why not at least have some sort of balance and make it so she doesn’t always have to choose or she can choose both? (Or even switch it up so Landon’s not involved every time?) Why not let her save everyone with the help of the other characters? Instead of always coming up with these circumstances that make it seem like saving Landon is wrong? Because how damaging is that to Landon as well? He’s been treated like he’s nothing his whole life, and by pushing this idea that Landon shouldn’t be saved, it’s like they’re trying to diminish his worth. And we know that Landon has felt like a burden in the past and like he’s not worth saving, and they’ve only reinforced this. And also by having no one else but Hope caring about saving Landon for the past season, and having everyone trying to prevent her from saving him.

So for them to go even further with all of this by having Hope willing to sacrifice Landon, to kill him, is terrible. And the whole way they went about it just makes it even worse, by having Hope just accept it and seem at peace with it. When Hope having to even consider killing Landon would be so painful and horrific for her. The idea of that is gut-wrenching, but they portrayed it as if it was all fine, which I found disturbing. They go and have her talk to Raf, as if she’s getting his blessing so that she can feel okay about sacrificing Landon. In which they had Raf acting the total opposite of himself, not caring about Landon, his brother, dying, and reassuring Hope that Landon would understand. And the way that they’re using the fact that Landon would be fine with Hope killing him to make it seem okay, when Landon has never hesitated to harm himself and has been suicidal in the past and is always willing to sacrifice himself, like... of course he’d think killing him is okay. But that does not make it okay. They should not be using Landon’s self-sacrificing tendencies to justify killing him. And the fact that all of this is not even being presented as a tragedy, but rather as something almost beautiful, by having this talk about Landon being able to find peace and using it to emphasize how selfless Hope is since she’s willing to sacrifice him? I’m sorry, but that’s disgusting. It feels like this entire situation is being romanticized, within the show, and I’ve seen fans romanticizing it too. Particularly the idea of Hope being willing to let Landon go (I guess we’ll forget about “don’t let me go. Never” too). I’ve even seen people comparing it to what Landon was willing to do for Hope in 3x01 and 4x01, by “letting go” of her so he could die to save her, and how similar he and Hope are in that way. And while I do agree that they’re similar, I don’t see how those situations are even comparable. Landon is willing to “let go” of Hope for her in order to save her life by sacrificing himself. The writers have now made Hope willing to let go of Landon in order to kill him. This is not the same thing. (I’m curious if people would have the same reaction if they suddenly had Landon willing to kill Hope.) They’re literally making it so Hope will have to murder the love of her life. Someone who grew up abused and unloved, who has experienced so much pain and death and has been suffering all this time, and they’re gonna have the only person left (in the real world) who cares about him, the person who loves him most, kill him? And for them to also make Hope do this, after she already lost her parents and her uncle, after she felt responsible for their deaths and had to deal with that guilt. And then felt like she’d never be happy again, and feared losing someone else she loved. Only to have Landon make her happy, who is now the love of her life, who she’s already had to lose how many times and has already felt the guilt of thinking that she killed him. And had been fighting for him and trying so hard to save him, and now they’re gonna have her actually kill him? And deal with more guilt and pain on top of losing him? Or, based off of last episode, they may even make her seem okay with it, which would be even worse? Maybe I’m just super sensitive or something, but this is all quite sick and twisted to me. It doesn’t sit right with me at all. And I don’t see how this is a serve for Handon either. But again, it’s like they are trying to make this all seem okay and are just doing this as a way to showcase Hope’s selflessness. And while I agree that Hope’s selflessness is amazing and a beautiful thing, the context of how they’re doing it, by making her take it this far, is too much and unnecessary. And makes it feel like Handon’s season 3 storyline, and all of Hope’s efforts to save Landon throughout season 3, were for nothing. I just... I can’t.

And I obviously don’t blame Hope’s character for this, I blame the writers. If they absolutely had to have Landon be sacrificed, they could have gone about it differently that still would’ve stayed true to Hope’s character. They could have actually had her doing more to try to save Landon before accepting him dying. Whatever happened to “screw fate”? I really thought both Hope and Landon were gonna be fighting fate, ideally together. Idk why they’ve not been focusing on Landon at all these last few episodes. They could’ve had him fighting Malivore from the inside while Hope fights him from the outside. They could’ve had Hope actually see Landon when she did the head dive, to find him and help him to fight, and they would both be the ones to defeat Malivore. Or, if Landon does have to die, they could at least have Hope fighting against that till the end and not wanting to do it. But ultimately having to, if there’s no other choice and Landon is asking her to. And actually show the pain of that decision for Hope, and her being affected by it. Rather than what they did last episode by not having her act affected at all, as if she’s not allowed to react or be affected by anything anymore and has to just get over all her fears and trauma and grief. But that’s what they chose to do, as well as ignore Landon, when we know he could be helping, and put it all on Hope and make her have to let go of Landon. So much for fighting fate, I guess. But who knows, maybe they’ll have Hope trying to find a way to save Landon again next episode, since they often seem unable to decide what narrative they wanna follow. Which would help this whole situation a lot, but I’m not gonna count on it. It just feels like I watched Hope fight for Landon and talk about how she would be there for him and save him, week after week over the course of several months, only for it to not amount to anything when it matters most. And it makes it feel pointless. It’s all just so disappointing.

#text #handon #4x03 #my posts #tw suicide #this is super long #and negative #feel free to ignore #just getting my thoughts out #and pretty sure i’m the only one who feels this way anyway #but whatever

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astermacguffin · 4 years ago

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The semantic logic of AMVs

I finally finished the post I promised to @katebushstandean , so here's my contribution to the blossoming field of spn amv studies.

In this post I made about fanworks and intertextuality, I argued that AMVs can be referred to as a "discourse between discourses." What I meant by that (and I elaborated on this in the post) can be summarized in this argument structure:

(1) AMVs are typically a dialogue/discourse between a song and a show/film.

(2) A song is already a discourse of its own (i.e. it's the dialogue between music and lyrics).

(2) A show/film is already a discourse of its own (i.e. it's the dialogue between the visual and auditory elements of the show/film).

I want to push this argument even further and argue for a more generalized theory of meaning that should (ideally) be applicable to any piece of media.

LAYING THE FOUNDATION

Let's start by analyzing at least just one medium at a time. Take music, for example. Without lyrics, how does music convey meaning at all? Now, I won't go too much into either music theory or the psychology/sociology of music (since I don't think I'll be able to give these subjects any justice anyway), but I want us to look at music more structurally/linguistically. (I am certainly not a linguist, but I am a training logician and I think it would be interesting to extract the logical/semantic relations that occur in music if we treat it as a "text".)

If we want to break down music into its smallest possible units of meaning (the same way we break down language into morphemes in morphology), then we would probably end up with notes, beats, and chords as our basic units (among other stuff, like timbre). Obviously, we cannot subject music to the same reductionist approach we do with either natural or formal languages (e.g. breaking down language into morphemes/propositions/subject-predicate relations/functions).

This is due to the fact that music doesn't really agree that much with the principle of compositionality—that "the meaning of the whole is a function of the meanings of its parts and their mode of syntactic combination." (If you disagree with Montague semantics, you might even argue that the same is true for natural languages and that only formal languages are truly compositional, but I digress). Generally, there is "more than the sum of its parts" when it comes to music; the meanings of a chord don't solely depend on the meanings of the individual notes that make up the chord.

Anyway, back to music and meaning-making.

Yip Harburg has this interesting quote on songwriting, which Adam Neely references here at this mark (15:29–16:10), a quote he originally got from Ben Levin. The quote says: "Music makes you feel feelings, lyrics make you think thoughts, songs make you feel thoughts." I think this quote best encompasses what I mean when I argue that songs are "discourses" of their own.

But even without the lyrics, music on its own is already "discursive." A single note played once doesn't really "mean" much, in the sense that we can't really gather as much meaning out of it alone. The note's relationships with other musical elements is what opens up the realms of meanings that we can attribute to it. (This concept is explored much better in here.)

The same thing is true with natural languages. Morphemes and words have meanings on their own, sure, but they don't really say that much on their own until you place them in a specific order with other morphemes/words. A single sentence is already a discourse between the units of meaning that compose the sentence.

I have been using the term "discourse" a lot, but what do I mean when I use the term? Without spending too much time explaining my own theory of discourse, let's define a discourse as a "series of discursive units." A discursive unit consists of two parts: a prompt and a response. What's important to know about responses in a discourse is that you won't really be able to fully grasp what they mean without knowing what the prompts are (i.e. what they are responding to).

When I describe song and lyrics as "discourses", what I think I really mean is that they are "discourse-like" (hence the description, "discursive"). The words of a sentence treat each other as their own prompts/responses; they're not as meaningful alone, but when taken together, meaning emerges. The same goes with music.

Taking this to a more macro scale, we can treat each episode of a show as their own discourses, and each episode "responds" to the others in some way. The harmonies, tensions, and contradictions that emerge from the "conversations" between these episodes are what we often respond to when we make fanworks (fanart, fanfics, meta, and the likes).

Generally, there are two kinds of "conversations" that happens within and among pieces of media:

The intra-discursive (the conversations that happen within a single text, like how a show's episodes converse with each other), and;

The inter-discursive (also called the intertextual, or the conversations that happen between different texts).

Now that we have established these terms and concepts, we're FINALLY talking about AMVs.

THE DEAL WITH AMVS

I've already touched upon this in my intertextuality post, but it's worth repeating. What I believe AMVs do is reveal the intra-discursive using the inter-discursive. What this means is that by making the subject text converse with other texts (e.g. by making clips from Supernatural "dialogue" with a song of your choice), you are somehow extracting the implicit discourses present in the original text.

When we talk about fanworks (and transformative works in general), we often talk about it in terms of recontextualization, as well as adding something new that wasn't there in the original text (e.g. fix-its). But a neglected aspect of fanworks that I believe AMVs bring to light is the revelatory power of fanworks, like the way it makes the people (may it be the audience or the original creators) confront the implications and implicit meanings already present in the text.

(Learn more about the semantic logic of AMVs below the cut)

Another interesting thing that AMVs do is that it often makes the subject text subservient to the song. More often than not, it's the show that has to adjust to the song; it's the show that has to be sliced and diced in order to fit the song. This is simultaneously a form of violence and a form of liberation—violent in the sense that goes against authorial intent (with "author" here used loosely to refer to the forces that brought the piece to life, may it be a single person or an entire production team) and liberating in the sense that the latent or supressed narratives are brought to light.

Even before the AMV is done, this discursive process is already made explicit by the act of editing. In most editing softwares, you get to see the timeline of your material and an explicit divide between the audio and the visual elements. The audio stream is already a discourse of its own, and the same goes with the video stream.

When you vertically slice these juxtaposed streams and cut out a portion of it, you now have what I call a "semantic moment" locked in time. We can imagine the audio being divided into these little semantic moments (e.g. the chords, a key change, a shift in dynamics or tempo, etc.) and something similar can be said with the video (e.g. vital scenes in the show). Now, a semantic moment doesn't have to be special or eventful; in fact, most of them aren't. In fact, all of experience is nothing but a series of semantic moments (i.e. moments of extractable meaning).

Now, imagine an AMV playing in front of you right now. Let's represent the audio as a series of semantic moments from A1 to An and do something similar to the video, from V1 to Vn. If we represent the flow of time from left to right, then we can talk abstractly about experiencing an AMV like this:

A1-A2-A3-A4-A5...-An

V1-V2-V3-V4-V5...-An

Every moment of our experience of the AMV can be divided into a series like this. AMVs are art objects that unfold over time: they are temporal, and therefore we cannot immediately access all parts of the semantic "discourse" of the text all at once—we have to wait for them to happen.

Let's say I want to analyze Semantic Moment number 6 because something interesting happens there: the chord suddenly shifts into a minor key while at the same time, the video shows a character turning their back to the camera. Now, there are three possible ways to handle this (none of which are mutually exclusive; we usually perform these modes of analysis simultaneously):

Vertical analysis - analyzing the discourse between A6 and V6. What meanings are brought up when we take these two elements in conjunction? What associations do we have with minor keys, with people turning around, and how these associations influence the other?

Horizontal analysis - analyzing the discourse between A6 and its earlier counterparts, A1-A5, or between V6 and V1-V5. Earlier, we have discussed that a single chord or a single word on its own doesn't mean that much; it's their relationships with other elements that bring out their "meaning space." What "narratives" or "metaphorical gestures" are brought upon when you consider these semantic moments as discourses/texts as a whole?

Diagonal analysis - analyzing the discourse between A6 and V1-V5, or between V6 and A1-A5. Here, you make the semantic moment converse with the "history" of its counterpart. What are the events that happened in the earlier parts? For example, knowing that the earlier parts of the song were in major key before the turn-around scene might influence our reading of it. Similarly, knowing that the earlier scenes depict a happy relationship might influence how we read the minor shift.

Again, we often do these analytic slices as quick as possible (and often simultaneously); it's not something that we often do consciously (unless the subject text is actually that dense and difficult). It's instinctual to us to bring up these comparisons and engage with the explicit and implicit discourses of meaning happening with any kind of text we interact with.

Now, here's where it gets more complicated. Unless the AMV in question is just a scene lifted from the show and overlaid with a song, it would usually involve a bunch of cutting and joining between different scenes/episodes. What this means is that you're taking an already temporal object and reassembling it into a new order in time. This means that we might've initially thought of as V1-V2-V3-V4-V5...Vn might actually be V3-V1-V6-V19-V8...Vn or some other permutation.

Again, this process is simultaneously violent and liberating—violent because you are destroying its intended order, and liberating because you are negating the tyranny of linearity and contiguity. What I mean by this is that people tend to focus on the discourse of the semantic moments depending on how close they are in space and time. For example, we might focus on how V1 is in dialogue with V2 and how V2 is in dialogue with V3, but the farther the semantic moments are, the less likely we are to notice their discourse.

What AMV editors do is rebel against the tyranny of this habit and bring into light the connections that might have gone unnoticed without the intervention. We often talk about how certain fanworks are more analytical than transformative (e.g. fanfics that function more as character studies and meta analyses of the source text), and there certainly is a spectrum of this among different genres of fanworks. I believe that AMVs, no matter how transformative they are, cannot help but invoke a certain analyticity in their production and reception.

And that concludes my AMV essay. I'll probably add more to this when I gather more thoughts (like how these three posts are related in some way).

Lemme know if y'all wanna hear more about my theory of discourse or something else related. Support your content creators and reblog!

#spn #spn amv studies #long post #aster writes

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johns-prince · 4 years ago

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“I’ve seen religion from Jesus to Paul” I always thought that line wasn’t about John worshipping Paul, but about other people worshipping Paul. I mean, John is criticising religion in this song, he’s criticising worship. He didn’t believe in Jesus, so “from Jesus to Paul” doesn’t seem like it’s supposed to be about himself and his religions imo. I always thought it was about beatlemania and how people worship Paul like a god when in reality he’s just as flawed as any of us. It’d fit with John being mad at Paul.

I might be wrong of course! I never thought about it as John saying he worshipped Paul, so my point of view isn’t really well thought out or anything. It’s just what goes through my head when I listen to the song. I hope you don’t think I disagree with you or anything 🥺 I just love discussing mclennon

No, I think you’re right, but I also believe it’s more complicated than that.

I found something, and I find it really interesting:

“In this angry and bitter song Lennon attacks a number of falsehoods such as the idolatry of the Beatles and how he is the focus for many of those involved in the peace movement.” [x]

It’s incredibly curious how John went with using only Paul’s name, if that’s what this song is supposed to be about. If it’s supposed to be about the whole band itself, why only use Paul’s name in it? Why be so direct as that? We know why—

“The lyrics are some of Lennon’s most vitriolic, taking shots at religion, his parents, drugs, and even his former songwriting partner (“I seen religion from Jesus to Paul”). It presents a clear perspective on the past, a theme he would revisit on the Imagine album’s ‘Oh My Love’ the following year.” [x]

Now that make’s better sense, since I don’t believe this was taking a shot directly at The Beatles and the period of idolatry (Beatlemania), but taking direct shots at Paul.

It’s hypocritical for him to basically claim people were worshipping Paul like some God or religion, when John was being no better in basically being quite obsessive about the man. The opposite of love isn’t hate, but indifference.

And again, if this song is supposed to be about criticizing the worship and idolatry of The Beatles, why is he only directly referencing Paul McCartney?

Doesn’t add up.

To me this song is not only for John to “air out” his supposed grievances, and emotions/feelings towards Paul, but to be petty, and lash out at his ex-partner.

This song screams scorned lover to me, someone who’s clearly hurt, deeply hurt, and is lashing out and using music to convey how he feels. I don’t agree that it presents a clear perspective on the past, because it’s John in the 70s and we all must acknowledge that 70s John is not at all a reliable narrator, and often contradicted himself in interviews and double backed on what he’d say about the past, and what he had to say or feel about Paul. It’s his perspective, that’s true, but more-so a skewed perspective on not only the past, but of his feelings at the time and heat of the moment, towards Paul.

John was probably not only envious (To John, Paul is stable, he’s put together, and John recognized and acknowledged that Paul was extraordinarily talented and could very well succeed without him), but hurt that Paul, it seemed, didn’t need him to get along. A fear that most likely rooted and became a nagging insecurity, after Paul unleashed Yesterday in 1965, and then came the questions of whether Paul would leave The Beatles (John) and start a solo career.

It’s obvious that the band broke up because of what was going on between John and Paul, their falling out due to John’s growing lack of involvement due to his use of heroin, which made him unapproachable and testy, his unhealthy escapism into Yoko and her influence/presence. In the end, it’s no real surprise that Paul left. John resented it, even if it was his fault, his doing and behavior that left Paul with no other choice then to abandon ship.

So, Paul left him, and was planning on going solo, and launching his own band in the next year.

Now let me point something out put on your tinfoil hats let’s see if I don’t lose any of you here lol—

Now that I showed you what I been through Don't take nobody's word what you can do There ain't no Jesus gonna come from the sky Now that I found out I know I can cry I, I found out I, I found out

Okay, so I’m reading the two lyrics “There ain’t no Jesus gonna come from the sky,” and “Now that I found out I know I can cry,” as connected. While yes John didn’t seem to believe in Jesus, he was still spiritual. Now, take those two lyrics, of some messiah not going to come and how the realization of it, of the fact this religion or ‘God’ isn’t going to come down and save you— and finding this out, of course you’re going to cry.

What you believed was going to somehow save you, save you from the miseries of life and save you from yourself, wasn’t actually going to come, or happen, that can really break person who was relying on such faith.

I seen through junkies, I been through it all I've seen religion from Jesus to Paul Don't let them fool you with dope and cocaine No one harm you feel your own pain I, I found out I, I found this out I, I found out

Now, I do agree that John is knocking religion and idolatry worship, but also taking shots at Paul.

But I just think John’s outing himself here, because, okay look. John’s seen through junkies— John was a junkie when writing this, let’s be real. He can say he isn’t fooled by them, but he clearly is— he was fooling himself.

So let’s just go with John is apparently attacking The Beatles here— we all know John loved The Beatles, and had just as much faith and passion for it as Paul did. He put all his eggs in that theoretical basket.

And throughout the height of The Beatles, who were the two always together? Who had plans about sticking together and growing old together still making music? Who two had ideas to write a musical together, one day?

John and Paul were John and Paul, and both believed it was always going to be that way. They’d mentioned running off to Scotland to escape a potential draft, Paul had said that after The Beatles he and John would still continue making music together, that as they got older they’d even make music for other, younger musicians to play. It was ALWAYS John and Paul, like, always.

So imagine you have all this faith in someone, all this love, you see them as a stable structure in your life, someone who rarely let’s you down, who’s ALWAYS going to be there for you, who has shared so many intimate experiences with, who knows you and has seen you without your armor on, seen the good the bad and the ugly and still wants to be with you, who you’ve shared similar, vivid dreams with, who would experience misery and fear with you (the LSD trip), who seemingly shares a secret and unspoken language with you— only for all of it, to fall flat, for it to go horribly wrong, for them to (unintentionally) reject you, to hurt you and leave you feeling abandoned and alone. That perhaps they don’t love you in the way you’d come to the realization that you wanted them too.

For you to realize, or feel, like they can’t save you, that they can’t fix you. Because, like you said, Paul isn’t perfect, he doesn’t always have it together, he wasn’t as stable as John believed him to be naturally— Paul’s just as flawed as any of us. He was struggling too, and simply couldn’t always meet John’s sometimes unrealistic expectations and desires.

I think in some way, The Beatles, and thus Paul, were somewhat of a religion to John. He believed in them unlike anything else. Even if partially satirical, the comment of them becoming Bigger than Jesus, I think that in itself is worship (even if that’s unintentional, or perhaps a Freudian slip) of what they all created together— what John and Paul created together. That they could become more popular than Jesus Christ himself, and the religions he’s attached too.

So I honestly believe John was just telling on himself throughout this song. How John wrote his songs, they were personal, they had something to do with him, how he felt and perceived things, his desires and fears— even when attacking or criticizing someone, or something else.

Cor I could be 100% completely wrong in my interpretation and analysis, and I’m just a biased McLennoner who needs to shaddup.

Now a side tangent real quick because I found this and I have something to say:

“This song includes the line: "The freaks on the phone won't leave me alone, so don't give me that brother, brother." Lennon explained the lyric to the January edition of Rolling Stone. He said: "I'm sick of all these aggressive hippies or whatever they are, the "Now Generation," being very up-tight with me. Either on the street or anywhere, or on the phone, demanding my attention, as if I owed them something." [x]

In 1969 he and Yoko did that performative, elitist Bed In For Peace for two whole bloody weeks. Not to mention spreading all that “War is over if you want it to be,” sloganeering. Of course they (the hippie Now Generation) expected something from him, he’d been playing political activist with Yoko for attention, and he got it. So for him to be bitching about suddenly being looked too as some leading figure for these movements, I think is pretty telling.

Like how it mentioned up there, that John had an issue being part of the main focus for those in the ‘Peace movement’, I think it’s funny, or at most annoying, how people claim John was some hippie or commie when, I think it was clear, he didn’t want anything to do with those individuals or whatever they were selling (I mean John was materialistic and a capitalist, all the boys were) John wasn’t political, he wasn’t very interested in all that, and like with most things, his fascination and interest in it faded quickly and he became bored and disillusioned by the ideologies and political figures, and dropped them.

I’m not saying John didn’t care, like anyone he had opinions and thoughts, feelings on subjects— he wasn’t seriously into politics. He wasn’t a political leader, he didn’t want to become a political figure or martyr, he wasn’t a radical of any sorts, and had admitted later on about being embarrassed about who he was during the Imagine period of his life, and regretted a lot of what he’d said or done.

Anyway... I know this was supposed to be about dissecting the lyrical and personal(mclennon) meaning too “I’ve seen religion from Jesus to Paul,” but it really is all over the place. Sorry about that.

#questionsquestionsquestions #mclennon #beatles discussion/discourse

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my-hyperfixation-trash-can · 4 years ago

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Hetalia’s Russia and DID/OSDD 1-b

Hey! So @autistic-hetalia your blog said you accept neurodiverse head canons and I thought maybe I could share this one with your blog!

I believe the Hetalia character of Russia has OSDD 1-b (Otherwise Specified Disociative Disorder or possibly DID, being Dissociative Identity Disorder) and this is why.

Just a note,

There is no such thing as an evil alter. Do not demonize people with DID or Other Dissociative Disorders! Those with this disorder are victims of Trauma and are likely to continue being victims of abusers, rarely do they become abusers!

Anyways, -cough cough- I’d love if anyone wants to add to this with more evidence!

1. Russia had a traumatic childhood

He is shown to have had abusive bosses who would punish him. He is threatened by one to invent steam power by the end of the week or be punished. Tartar Yoke mentioned by Lithuania as one of his bosses was also known for his cruelty. So the Authority figured in his youth were often cruel and held power over him.

His environment is cold and unforgiving much like an abusive home. Russia often describes his home as cold, quiet and lonely. He rarely found support from his land and often struggled to get by. The environment and home were harsh with little support. It is also implied he froze to death each Winter, and celebrated the year he didn’t.

This is on top of having to deal with other nations attacking him, making him feel helpless. Many nations “bullied” him in attempts to conquer him. He was mobed and pursed every day by Mongolia. That is exhausting to have everyone around you be a threat. (Lithuania and his sisters were the only nations kind to him in his youth) Early on, he learns that force and strength are what matters.

Next point tw sexual abuse and assault

He also felt a great deal of responsibility to care for his sisters. He was close to them, as they were experiencing similar issues and not violent to him. He had to be the strong one. Belarus and her unhealthy attachment to Russia depending on the age she started her behaviors may have also contributed to his trauma. All of the siblings have unhealthy attitudes towards boundaries with their bodies and the bodies of others, implying another type of abuse. Ukraine and Belarus took victim roles. Russia took on an abusers. Ukraine only ever suggests using her body to get what she wants as if never taught anything else, even as a child that’s what she knows. Belarus I don’t know where to begin, but her staring off is certainly dissociative like, paired with other trust issues. In a diary entry she is stated to have possibly messaged Ukraine’s breasts, once again showing more unhealthy boundaries with attachments to loved ones. Someone taught her that. And Russia, who internalized his abusers, acted out his abuse on others as implied with Lithuania looking distressed dressed as a maid and Russia holding a whip. In another non canon game Himaura worked on, Bulgaria in the bad ending is shown tied up and naked implied to be whipped by Russia as Russia says this is “tradition” or possibly more routine implying this is something he does often.

The idea with dissociative disorders is that the repetitive trauma that happens has to be too much for the mind of that individual child in comparison to the culture they’re raised in, and it conflicts with getting their needs met. And to the countries, all of them know Russia has had a life with far more conflicts in his youth than most, and a great deal of pain.

2. Russia has General Winter (GW for short)

General Winter manifests when Russia is being attacked by other nations in order to defend him, or to be a tormentor to Russia himself (such as freezing him to death each Winter).

This is oddly similar to what is known as a persecutor alter. These alters have the goal in mind to protect the host or body, but they’re a bit misguided in how to do that. They might take on the form of an abuser, or something outside the body, this turns into being an Introject. I’ll post a link to more info on DID/OSDD at the end of the post. The educational videos playlist will have a video on alter roles.

Russia’s bosses often abused him, and if he had an alter like this it would make sense that it would take the form of a general, someone in power who feels so much bigger and stronger than him. A boss who can push him around and make him behave in a way that will avoid further trauma from the real abusers. Winter the season, being another tormenting force of the environment, is another abuser, and it makes sense GW would take that into his identity. Russia feels helpless to it. It is also worth noting that other nations who also had to deal with Harsh winters do not have General Winter as an ally. He only protects Russia.

It would also explain why General Winter protects Russia from others attacking him. He took the ideologies of his abusers to heart, so GW pushes people away and treats them like threats. He feels strong by holding power and fear over others and force. If I can be stronger, no one can hurt me or would dare try, this is the mentality.

I believe GW can manifest as he does because Russia has magic. It’s canon that Russia can do magic or has a strange magic of his own, so whose to say GW can’t utilize it too. Perhaps even to let himself manifest sometimes in his spirit like form. This is more a headcanon or idea though.

Russia himself however is shown to be very passive with his bosses. These are people who hold power over him that he can’t really run away from or fight. So his response is to faun or freeze. This is basically stated in the comics (picture below.) and it’s often that alters have a specific role. Russia’s would be to people please those who he can’t fight. Making General Winter’s job to defend from attack.

3. Russia is shown to dissociate

When he is told to do an impossible amount of work, he just straight up loses himself in a fantasy immediately to escape the reality of the situation. There are other instances too, some in his childhood directly, but this was the most overt. This is from To your Hearts content, Russia!

4. Russia Is Inconsistent

There are times when Russia feels very different from moment to moment.

He goes from open about himself to swiftly sadistic and cold. He has moments of childish behavior to moments of maturity. These, when combined with the rest of my points, are worth noting. He both wants to hurt (possibly destroy) the others, but also be liked by them?

You can’t destroy people and have them like you.

The baltic Trio who lived a substantial amount of time with him still are confused by his unpredictable behavior. Each encounter The Baltic’s have with Russia is marked by a fear of what he might do. And not having certainty, thus they say things without knowing if it’s safe or not.

Even to Lithuania, (Whom Russia often shows Vulnerability to, in moments like bloody Sunday and Sharing his dreams in Outsourcing Sequel)living with Russia feels a strange theme park where he never knew what to expect. Lithuania has been shown to be great in strategy and games of wit, and a commendable leader with great people skills, yet he only has a general idea of Russia’s behavior? He is seen advising Prussia and Moldova that Russia likes it when people laugh or cry easily (This being predictable to Russia and thus easier to navigate social situations with) so it’s not like Lithuania isn’t paying attention. Russia shows moments of vulnerability and his thought process in panels like Bloody Sunday, which is quite telling as to what he believes are his responsibilities, and how the world works.

Now the real question is “why is he like this?”

He only understands the world from the point of view of someone who still lives in the abuse and knows no other options. He never had anyone teach or show him different. His world is ruled by who is the strongest, and if you can obey the strong you won’t get hurt or discarded. “We don’t want children who can’t play nice,” sounds like something an abuser told him frequently in his youth.

Russia just doesn’t have a support system due to his strained relationships with everyone. So he keeps relying on old defense mechanisms, hence letting General Winter step in when something threatens his sense of safety.

Nearly Every time (at least that’s what I noticed) Russia is emotionally vulnerable to someone, he suddenly changes to be sadistic or scary. It successfully pushes the person away and Reestablishes the fear of Russia in the individual, returning him to a state of being feared and alone where none of the other countries can hurt him. Examples below.

France talking to Russia after meetings and asking him personal questions would result in Russia ending the conversation by scaring him with a scsry remark and aura suddenly.

Russia Comforting China after Japan turns on him, he is kind and compassionate at first, but suddenly changes at the end.

The Baltic Trio never knows what to expect. He frequently uses fear and force to keep them.

This behavior seems directly contradictory to wanting friends and having a warm and lively home. So GW still reacts with a trauma response, and Russia reacts in line with his wishes of making friends and having others around him. The Use of force and intimidation is naturally the middle ground between their wishes. Russia believes everyone is his friends, and doesn’t see how his behavior is pushing people away. Other times he seems to want friends to like him back, like when he sent France an anonymously written letter to his radio show. However he has wishes that contradict.

Now, I think he sees friends as people he can keep near him that he enjoys the company of. (This doesn’t need to be mutual or involve trust, just force) but those wants directly contradict.

I think GW is passively influencing him with some of the behavior rather than switching out right, but either option still would have the same effects. Passive influence is when an alter is close to the front, or feels/thinks something strong enough that it affects the person at the front. Making them behave in a way that is ooc for them, but not the other who intentionally or unintentionally influenced them.

This would explain sudden shifts to a cruel threatening position with other nations, something that will most likely always be a threat GW needs to defend against. He is particularly cold and defensive with anyone that has a chance to hurt him, (or tries to look into his psyche) regardless of if they made a move to do so.

More on passive influence can be found in the sources at the bottom under educational playlist.

5. Misc. Points of knowledge

Russia’s character originally was meant to be a cry baby, and only when he drinks, has a complete switch in personality. Frankly I’m glad he was changed to the complex guy we have now. However I think this concept wasn’t fully lost.

His character song, Winter, seems to talk of him experiencing freezing to death each Winter. Further adding to his repetitive trauma.

It is not unheard of for nations to have disorders and conditions. Australia has ADHD, Prussia is Albino, Lithuania has severe anxiety (and possibly PTSD), so who is to say a nation like Russia can’t have a dissociative disorder?

It is stated in one of Russia’s character bios that “General Winter is always with him”, however where? I don’t physically see him, but perhaps we can’t because he’s sharing a body with Russia.

In summary

Russia dissociates under stress

Russia has repetitive traumas and an ongoing history of abuse all his life

Russia has inconsistent behavior and attachments

General Winter could certainly be a separate personality and functions exactly like an introject/persecutor alter would to their host.

Russia acts out and damages relationships, acting in inconsistent ways that might play out his own abuse, and/or reflect his desires to keep others near him.

As a note, I actually have DID, so this could be my projecting, but please don’t yell at me about how I made a “villain” have DID and feed into evil alters and split Stareotypes. I would only like to raise interest and provide an example of what a misrepresented disorder can look like. And the links below are there if you want to make your mind up for yourself and educate yourself if this inspires your portrayal of him! This isn’t meant to be insensitive, I’ve been working on this post for months to word it as sensitive as I could while also acknowledging Russia is still responsible for his and GW’s actions. Saying he has DID isn’t to excuse it, just explain it.

Don’t erase his victims, but don’t erase that he also is one.

(This blog below was also really helpful, but this post covers a lot of Russia’s earlier trauma and his mentality)

https://ellawritesficssometimes.tumblr.com/post/175060886956

Research for DID and OSDD 1b below: (along with links to comics)

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLm56LzW0BA_P7-yL3rK7INZDDozTayJvJ

https://www.hetarchive.net/blog/tag/russia/

http://hetarchive.net/tag/russia/

http://www.hetarchive.net/blog/2013/10/11/blog-entry-1411/

https://hetalia.fandom.com/wiki/Russia

https://www.hetarchive.net/blog/2019/01/29/about-the-fact-that-russias-history-is-too-scary/

Below is for an example of dissociation:

http://www.hetarchive.net/blog/2019/02/28/to-your-hearts-content-russia/

https://youtu.be/ZV3ToVA5BqQ

youtube

https://did-research.org/origin/comorbid/dd/osdd_udd/index.html

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hello-that-happened · 3 years ago

Text

How She-Ra, Wrong Hordak, and I Deconverted in Six Steps

Alright y'all, it's time for my fourth essay exploring how She-Ra and the Princess of Power (SPOP) used Christian themes and parallels to provide a humanist message.

My first post named 9 major messages of SPOP that contradict Christian fundamentalism.

My second gave the historical context of how our generation and Noelle's are growing up to overthrow Christian fundamentalism after it became such a powerful enemy in the U.S.

My third discussed the parallel between Horde Prime’s rage at Hordak’s self-naming and the Christian idea that everyone is an instrument of God’s will.

Now I want to discuss how Adora's and Wrong Hordak's journeys defections from the Horde parallel my story, and potentially others', of leaving Christianity. Adora and Wrong Hordak experience many of the same stages in his journey out of the Horde as many ex-Christians experience leaving Christianity.

My own experience leaving Christianity was a journey into atheism, so I will interpret Adora's and Wrong Hordak's stories through that lens. Plenty of people who left toxic/conservative Christianity behind still believe in God, in heaven, and/or in the value of Christian communities. I do not want to minimize or dismiss their experiences, and I welcome progressive Christians as allies in the fight for LGBT+ rights and social justice generally. But when I watched Adora and Wrong Hordak leave their belief in The Horde behind, I saw myself leaving Christianity behind. I want to tell my story through/alongside theirs. I hope some of you can relate, but it is okay if you cannot, regardless of your religious beliefs or lack thereof.

Deconversion in Fast-Forward

Adora, Wrong Hordak, and I escaped from the organizations that raised us and its worldview in six somewhat-distinct stages:

Multiple major characters' arcs in She-Ra begin with rethinking their loyalty to The Horde. Wrong Hordak and Adora both lose their faith in The Horde after a lifetime of indoctrination into its ideals and goals. Their journey away from The Horde mirrors many young Americans' away from Christianity, with at least one notable exception: time. Deconversion takes multiple years for most ex-Christians, but only takes a few days for Adora and Wrong Hordak. Their de-conversion basically represents a speed run of most ex-Christians'.

Full Breakdown of Each Stage

(tw: mention of depression and suicidal ideation)

Adora takes delight in pretending to beat up an imaginary princess in the show's first scene, and later calls princesses "violent instigators who don't even know how to control their powers." She believes in the ideals of The Horde, and feels excited to rise through the ranks to become Force Captain. Obedience to Horde authorities comes fairly naturally to her, and she even chides Catra for being "disrespectful."

Wrong Hordak consistently repeats his loyalty to Horde Prime throughout his first episode and beyond. Even while being attacked by his fellow clones, Wrong Hordak affirms that "We serve Horde Prime's will." Unprompted in the next episode he happily announces, "I believe in Horde Prime!"

I felt proud, as a kid in Sunday School, that I could answer more questions about the Bible than any of the other kids. My church's youth group was the most enjoyable part of my middle school years especially because I got to hang out with the guy I only recently realized I'd had a huge gay crush on. I started viewing "feeling happy" and "feeling the presence of God" as identical. I wrote in my 2011 "Faith Statement" for my church's Confirmation that "I fell in love with God," and that "I thank God that I was born into a good Christian family and was raised to honor God."

Adora is kidnapped by the Horde's enemies and taken away from her home, separated from all of the voices reassuring her that The Horde is a good organization with a just mission. Shadow Weaver is not around to give her orders or map out her future anymore, leaving her alone with her enemies and her thoughts.

Wrong Hordak's connection to the hive-mind he knew for all of his life is severed. "I am…alone?" he asks in shock, then breaks down and cries, "I am alone!" For someone who grew up living in the same mind as his entire communal "family," suddenly losing that connection to everyone he knew would be traumatizingly shocking. The best equivalent I can think of in human experience is being suddenly ripped away from your family and community and then never seeing them again.

I kept conflating happiness with my faith in God for years, even after my crush moving away drove me into suicidal ideation for a couple weeks in 2011. My mental health recovered for a year before settling into a long-term depression in 2012. Because I conflated happiness with the presence of God, my depression felt like something had taken away the presence of God.

Adora defends the organization that raised her by quoting her highest authority: "Hordak says we're doing what's best for Etheria. We're trying to make things better. More orderly." Glimmer argues against Adora's worldview by showing her (1) that princesses are just people instead of dangerous violent monsters, and (2) what The Horde has done: first the ruins of a village destroyed by The Horde, and then that the village of Thaymor which she was told to attack was peaceful, innocent, and happy.

Wrong Hordak grabs Entrapta by the hair for the crime of "trespassing," and enjoys saying, "Prime shall hear of this, and his punishment shall be merciless." But once Bow’s arrow disconnects him from the Horde’s hivemind, he is simultaneously stranded away from the people who constantly reinforced his belief in Horde Prime’s goodness and stuck with a group of people opposing Prime. For a long time, Wrong Hordak simply pretends that the Best Friend Squad™ serve Horde Prime just like everyone else he ever knew. Every line of his dialogue in “Taking Control” is a quick, snappy motto he took from Horde propaganda, like “I believe…in Horde Prime” and “True nourishment comes from the favor of Horde Prime.” [see footnote 1]

I was well aware, growing up in a progressive suburb, that plenty of my high school friends were nonreligious. After my depression sunk in, I found myself arguing about religion with a brilliant but very smug British friend who consistently refuted my arguments in ways I could not dispute. Searching for arguments to support my pre-existing beliefs, I started reading Christian apologetics, but found nothing my friends could not easily refute. [see footnote 2]

Adora sees the ruins of the site of a Horde attack while with Glimmer and Bow, and at first rejects what Glimmer tells her about what she sees to preserve her worldview: "This doesn't make any sense. The Horde would never do something like this…You don't know them like I do." But when she sees The Horde attack Thaymor, the belief system painstakingly constructed by The Horde and drilled into her over 15 (or so) years comes crashing down. At first she can rationalize away her experiences to preserve her beliefs, but when the evidence of her own senses becomes overwhelming she cannot resolve the cognitive dissonance between her belief in The Horde's goodness and her direct experience of The Horde attacking the innocent town of Thaymor. Her worldview cannot explain what she experienced.

Wrong Hordak keeps his belief in Horde Prime's all-powerful nature for a long time after joining the Best Friend Squad. However, when until the Best Friend Squad catches him in a contradiction. He tells them what he was told: that Krytis does not exist. As soon as they start questioning the contradiction he was fed, he becomes extremely uncomfortable. He maintains his denial of Krytis' existence even after they land on the planet, until he can no longer deny the evidence that Horde Prime is not all-powerful.

I grew up, like many of you, on the Internet. My depression began during the heyday of the online atheist movement—and by “heyday,” I mean “seemingly inescapable presence,” especially on YouTube where I hung out. I kept running into comments asking questions that I could not answer: Why does Christianity seem to promote belief based on internal feelings instead of observable evidence? Why would an all-loving god send anyone to hell forever? Why did I believe claims from Christian doctrine and doubt claims from every other religion? Why has Christianity seemed to cling to the past instead of embracing a progressive future? The questions overwhelmed me. I found myself terrified of my own growing doubts. Eventually, my belief was based entirely on two emotions: nostalgia for past happy experiences I associated with Christianity, and a fear of losing the vague hope those experiences gave me.

The first time that Bow and Glimmer met Adora, they immediately labeled her “Horde soldier!,” and the label stuck through the first three episodes. Adora has always identified herself primarily as a soldier serving The Horde, echoing the messages she has heard for her whole life: “Shadow Weaver said it didn't matter who I was before, that—that I was nothing before Hordak took me in.” The language of “I was nothing” reflects cult dynamics where a group tries to retain someone permanently by making them think of themself as nothing more than their worshipful loyalty to the group. Similarly, it is a common Christian belief that “without Jesus we are nothing.”

After realizing that Horde Prime fes him lies, Wrong Hordak collapsed into a sobbing mess. “Who am I if not an exalted brother of Prime?,” he bawled, still thinking that the only legitimate kind of identity is one based on fully devoted worship of an all-powerful authority. Per Entrapta, “It seem[ed] that Wrong Hordak has begun to question the meaning of life.” She later described Wrong Hordak’s breakdown as an “existential crisis,” which happens “when individuals question whether their lives have meaning, purpose, or value, and are negatively impacted by the contemplation.” Without an all-powerful father figure to value him, Wrong Hordak thought, who would?

I identified myself fundamentally as a Christian for my entire childhood and teen years. I found joy, purpose, and a sense of self in my religion. Leaving my religion behind felt like burning the bridge to who I was behind me. When I de-converted from Christianity, I felt like I was standing at the brink of a void. I thought that without finding goodness in God, I might find no goodness at all. [see footnote 3]

When Wrong Hordak finishes (digitally, but also emotionally) processing the Krytis data logs of Horde Prime leaving in defeat, he explicitly renounces his old loyalties and declares his opposition to the organization and beliefs that he used to believe in with all his heart: "Brothers! Horde Prime lied to us. He is a false ruler. We must rise up against him, and free the universe from his unjust reign!"

After Adora betrays the Horde at the Battle of Thaymor, she pledges her loyalty to Bright Moon in her battle against the Horde: "I’ve seen for myself the atrocities the Horde has committed against the people of Etheria, and I’m ready to fight to stop them. If you give me the chance, I know I can help the Rebellion turn the tide of the war."

I didn't have an explicit declaration statement like Wrong Hordak or Adora. However, on 5/5/15 I arranged a meeting with my very friendly and understanding youth pastor as a last-ditch effort to save my faith. I hoped that he would crush my worrying doubts. Instead, actually encouraged me to become agnostic and to look into non-Christian beliefs on the subject of religion. Rather than feeling terrified of what I might find and wishing that someone could indoctrinate me into my old belief system, I started on a path to discover the truth wherever it might lead me.

Footnotes for Context

Christian fundamentalists’ similarly simplistic snappy phrases have been labeled by ex-Christians as “thought-terminating clichés… brief, highly reductive, definitive-sounding phrases” where “Simple labels are attached to something you like or dislike, and they are the start and finish of all thought on the subject.” Such black-and-white “totalistic” thinking is common in Christian fundamentalism, especially how it labels complex political topics as somehow being merely a cover for “spiritual warfare” between the totally good/Godly side and the totally evil/demonic side.

Specifically, I started reading an “Intelligent Design” propaganda apologetics book by Lee Strobel called The Case For A Creator. A self-proclaimed former atheist, Strobel wrote his The Case For series using my same research strategy: Only do research using sources that already agree with you. Whereas Strobel exclusively talked to other Christian apologists, though, I at least tried talking to atheists. Anyway, I walked into school one day with a confident smile and a copy of Strobel’s book and sat down with some friends. One of them, another brilliant atheist but with a far subtler and humbler personality, noticed it and his face immediately sunk into the expression of someone exhausted by the topic as he braced himself for my bullshit. When I confidently asserted a creationist talking point trying to dismiss the findings of some old experiment, he not only knew the experiment but immediately dismantled my talking point. I had no reply. What struck me most was not just his swift rebuttal, but his weary tone: My arguments were not only bad, but so bad that he was genuinely tired of them.

Around the same time, I became obsessed with the character of Kefka from Final Fantasy 6. To me, Kefka represented what I feared most about leaving Christianity behind — that I would lose any sense of meaning, purpose, or morality in my life. ("Life… Dreams… Hope…Where do they come from? And where are they headed? Such meaningless things!") Edgy, I know, but in my mind that kind of absurdism seemed to be an inevitable result of abandoning my religious beliefs. Fortunately, I came to understand that there is plenty of meaning, purpose, beauty, and goodness outside of the particular religion that I happened to be born into.

#she-ra #spop #she-ra spoilers #spop spoilers #religion #christianity #long post #...#about me #religious meta

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natsumiheart · 4 years ago

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I look at a lot of stuff on Pinterest and one of people's reasons on why Oumasai is toxic is because Kokichi made Shuichi want to kill himself? Something tells me this is wrong but I'm not sure what proves it wrong. (I mean they also point out that Kokichi mocks Shuichi for mourning Kaede-) I'm asking about this because its been eating at me and trying to prove that it isn't toxic.

Hooo boy this is gonna be long so buckle up! I’m sorry I couldn’t make this shorter I just really go all ace attorney mode when it comes to this type of stuff.

Sorry if there are any mistakes or some parts are too confusing my internet might go soon so I can’t proofread and edit anymore!

I think what they’re referring to is how Shuichi got really depressed after discovering that the world had ended, but how can it be Kokichi’s fault? He literally wasn’t the mastermind, he didn’t make all that stuff up. Heck, he was the first one to even see that motive and on his own it was way worse to deal with. His behaviour was so out of line that Kaito got fed up with him and punched him for the nonsense he was saying.

The motive was supposed to make everyone fall to despair, it’s purpose was legit what happened to Miu where she NEEDED to go out to help out the world before everyone was gone. The motive was MEANT to be seen to make the game “More interesting” but Kokichi didn’t let the others see it until he finally convinced them that he’s the mastermind. If he didn’t the Mastermind would find a way to show it to them in a different way and there’s no knowing what could happen, and if he showed it to them himself they’re bound to believe what he’s saying considering the fact it’s obvious he already knew about this. He took that motive to basically make everyone give up on trying escape by killing each other, since as the mastermind he said “The game’s over now! There’s no point.” to prevent another murder from happening. AND IT WORKED, for a long while no murder took place but of course the actual mastermind couldn’t just sit idly and let the game be “boring” (Which was Kokichi’s goal) So they made a flashback light that Maki ended up seeing and calling the others to see, and the flashback light made everyone including Maki believe that Kokichi was a remnant of despair. They wanted to get rid of Kokichi for messing with the game and taking over their position, and this was their way to do it.

So, after all that, if others see that KOKICHI was the reason Shuichi wanted to give up for a second there. Then I really don’t know what to say. Shuichi has went through so much already because of the killing game and Kokichi’s attempt to stop the killing game is not the reason he wanted to give up. It was because he lost a lot his friends and because the world was most probably all gone. At that point he had nowhere to go back to and everything he has worked so hard for was for nothing because there’s nothing left. Kokichi didn’t do anything to Shuichi for him to be the sole reason he suddenly wanted to die. His depression got the best of him after being all alone with his thoughts for a couple of days, not eating or moving just sleeping the entire time. If anyone is at fault it’s the mastermind for making up such a cruel lie that even made Gonta commit murder to “save” the others.

And for the mocking him about Kaede’s death part (Which is literally one line after Shuichi removed his hat) Kokichi at that point had witnessed that the killing game was real and it was going to get him eventually. He wasn’t alright either and he had already started to make everyone hate him, acting more hostile and annoying so they all stay away (since anyone who groups up everyone or brings them hope will end up like Kaede did) He didn’t want to be the next Kaede or Rantaro. It started with that line but in the end he cut off all ties he had (if he had any) in chapter 4 so that they have no doubt that he is only full of malice and that he is indeed the mastermind.

“But how do you know that he has been devising that plan since back then?” Remember the “horse a” message? the first letters were added to it right before the next morning after the first trial where Shuichi entered the dining room without his hat. If you don’t believe me, here’s a paragraph from well written wiki!

Sometime between the end of the first trial and the morning of the next day, Kokichi would begin to devise of a plan to get everyone to think that he was the mastermind of this killing game, willing to be seen as evil for the sake of ending this madness. To begin this plan, he would leave a subtle message in the courtyard "Horse A", which he would later fill in with more letters as the killing game continued.

And here’s the source if you wanna check for yourself: Click here!

If it wasn’t already obvious, Kokichi is a LIAR. And his biggest lie of being the mastermind started after he saw the deaths of Rantaro and Kaede. That first chapter affected Kokichi a lot, he lied and lied to hide it but he was shaken up by the sudden death of Rantaro and was devastated by Kaede’s death. Though all he could say at her last moments is that she wasn’t boring. Because he knew, if he was truthful? Eyes would be on him immediately and he would be in danger.

Kokichi did his best to be the person he would hate the most, he lies so much yet says he hates liars, then says that’s a lie. Making everyone confused as to what the hell is right or wrong in what he’s saying. But he couldn’t keep up his facade forever especially when he was starting to get interested and even attached to Shuichi. In one completely optional scene in chapter 3 he legit says that he doesn’t want Rantaro to be the one who gets resurrected (Though he probably was more interested in him because he obviously knew more than he let on in chapter 1. Asking everyone about the Ultimate Hunt when no one else remembered it until they say the flashback lights, his fight with Hoshi, and how he was so sure that he WILL end the killing game. Kokichi even had his effigy in his room because he saw it as a clue or evidence that can help later, he needed to know what he was hiding and what his talent was.) and despite all that when Shuichi asks why he doesn’t want Rantaro to be the one, he says “Because you’d rather have Kaede back.” Of course he writes it off as a lie, but then right after that he SHOWS Shuichi his interest in Rantaro saying he might be working for the mastermind. The exact lines are:

Kokichi: “What if Rantaro was working for the mastermind? Bringing him to life might be a bad idea.”

(Trying to make Shuichi believe that he really did lie there about his reason why he didn’t want Rantaro to come back by making him believe that THIS was the real reason. I don’t know exactly if he entertained the idea or not, but he most probably did not believe Rantaro to be the mastermind here. He might have even made up that killing game anime he was talking about. Its’ real for us but might not be for them.)

Shuichi: “N-no that’s idiotic! Rantaro couldn’t have been working for the mastermind...:

“But is it really impossible? We only knew Rantaro for a short time. He did seem as though he was kind of used to the killing game”

The “used to” in that sentence was highlighted. THIS was Kokichi’s intention, to make Shuichi realise that Rantaro knew more than he let on. Which reinforces Kokichi’s interest in him. But Shuichi fell for Kokichi’s trap earlier and didn’t notice at all that he slipped the fact Rantaro would give more information.

It’s confusing I know, Kokichi’s thing is mind games after all. But what I’m trying to say is that for Kokichi’s goal to figure out this killing game and how to end it Rantaro would be most ideal to bring back but he just wanted to tell Shuichi that he’d rather have Kaede instead just so he’s happy. The evidence for that is how even after he says its a lie he lowkey shows Shuichi he’s more interested in Rantaro instead. It reminds me of those scenes where he says “WAAAHH I THOUGHT YOUD KNOW I HATE COFFEE” then right after he’s like “I’m tired of all that crying can I have a cup of coffee please.” Or “I actually can’t taste anything!” then “anyway my faves are spice and sugar!”

Kokichi did say something insensitive when he said “Is it cause Kaede died or whatever?” but it didn’t bother Shuichi at all he just brushed it off since he saw how he acted in the trial earlier. It wasn’t a surprise to him. Kaede’s death affected Kokichi too, and that line doesn’t match up with what he said about bringing Kaede back.

You never know what’s the truth and what’s a lie with Kokichi, everything he says contradicts each other. So how is it that all these people who hate Kokichi and call him toxic take his worst lines or moments as the truth when the context of his entire character and motive says otherwise. When he had to crush Shuichi the most so he believes that he is full of malice without a single doubt. To make him believe he was really the mastermind immediately, so he doesn’t go all detective on him like he usually does.

Kokichi’s actions were terrible yes but they were LIES he did it for a purpose that’s what makes him a grey character when in a KILLING GAME. It’s shown in salmon team that under normal circumstances the two would get along and Shuichi would want to learn more about Kokichi and his true self.

TLDR; Leave these children be, they were in a killing game. No ship is toxic unless it’s shown that person was terrible / messed up from the start and would hurt whoever they’re with. Those users just obviously don’t like Kokichi and hate seeing him with anyone XD and it’s obvious with how they blame him over a motive Monokuma/ the Mastermind has created and straight up ignoring the intentions behind his actions.

Now without evidence and stuff, truly speaking from my heart from here with full on bias XD

I get hating a character or a ship but oh my god can you not spread misinformation for others to feel obligated to agree? Toxic is such a strong word and I hate how people keep associating it with every ship they dislike. Making others feel bad for what comforts them! If Saiouma was so toxic how come it makes so many people happy? How come it makes people literally calm down, stop crying, and feel warm. Saiouma is one of the most adorable and realistic ships out there... Don’t ruin it for everyone else just because you don’t agree with how we feel. Just say you’re not a fan and move on!

Anyway don’t worry your ship is very valid! You can continue supporting them without feeling any guilt and if anyone calls it toxic they can see me so I break their kneecaps.

#rant #tw suicidal thoughts #oumasai #saiouma #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #danganronpa #drv3 #new danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 #i came to save a draft of a drawing to post tonight then saw this ask #AND I LEGIT SPENT 3 HPURS JUST WRITING AND PROOF READING AND STUFF PFPFP #call my otp toxic and youre dead ya hear #hope my answer helped you!#ill post the drawing tomorrow this is more important

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stormblessed95 · 3 years ago

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I don't know if this was talked about here or on another blog, but I would like to bring it up again after I saw something. It may be exhausted but I would like to go on a tiny rant for a bit. I hope you don't mind because you are most definitely swamped with asks and I just love hearing your opinions on things relating to KM. Also, I love the sass when responding to anons trying to start shit. It's beautiful and inspiring lol.

Moving on before I get even more distracted lol, it's about Tae's "get out of your imagination" response to that one person on Weverse (if Tae said that to me I probably would cry over how hard he roasted me lol). I have seen people come up with so many different translations but that's only International fans trying to translate it wrong. We never hear K ARMYs try to translate or misinterpret it in anyway from I have seen. Also, why would Tae be jealous over a fan saying that when he probably hears and sees stuff like that about JK and the members all the time. It comes with being an idol and he would not just suddenly slip because of one comment. Also, why would Tae get jealous if he knows who JK is going to stay with at the end of the night and that he is his significant other?

Besides people believing Tae would lie like that, what really bothered is that people actually thought TK moments increased and they were all affectionate with each other. And they basically said he contradicted his own words and that he was forced to type that to hide their relationship or some other bull crap. I would like to say that that is most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. First off, is that what really happened or are people letting their shipping goggles get in the way of taking the entire situation in? Did the moments actually increase or was everyone just trying to make something of nothing (this making of something that is actually nothing happens a lot. It still continues in the shipping community and it bothers me. Sigh.) Furthermore, why should Tae change his behavior with his friend because of what shippers say? They don't own him and they can't control what he does with his friends. I found it frankly ridiculous that people actually thought there would be a decrease in moments between the two, like what? Additionally, Tae most likely did not see it that way. He wasn't doing anything out of the normal. He was doing what he usually does and that is be very cuddly and sweet with not only JK but also all the members. It's like people forget that this is a band of 7 and not two (But what do I know, right?). I have seen people go crazy over how they think Tae would do two very contradictory things. Say one thing and then do another. If they would just take a deep breath and think about it they would realize that it is easy to solve. Just believe in what Tae said, in subtext or not. And with that that should have stomped on the shippers theories of TK being "real" but here we are. Ship wars and all. Btw what even is the point of ship wars? It only shows how insecure and angry people are over bonds that have nothing to do with them.

I personally don't think TKers will ever stop and will only get worse with time. JM and JK could kiss on stage and they would believe that JK was trying to make Tae jealous. I say KMers just settle down, ignore TKers and other haters, and just enjoy what KM has shown us. Rant over lol. Sorry if it was all over the place. My mind is a scary place and I can't always get everything in the order I want it to be in. Thanks!

Hello anon! Thank you for the compliments! I'm glad you enjoy my sass. I'm going to Screenshot that comment and send it to my husband next time he gets annoyed with my snarky behavior lmao

Me: strangers on the internet enjoy my sass, see?! Why so annoyed??

Him: strangers on the internet don't have to live with it 👀

Exactly how it'll go down, I'm positive lol

I enjoyed your rant, anon! I agree with you. Feel free to rant anytime! Something to keep in mind about tkkrs is that their ship is skin deep, literally. Its all basic skinship moments and some flirty stage interactions. Try not to let them get under YOUR skin too much. It's not worth it.

The stuff about tkkrs disregarding what Tae says comes down to respect. They do not respect Tae or JK at this point anymore. They use them to fuel their fantasy ship. It would be fine if they didn't take it so damn far where it truly seems like they aren't here for BTS, instead only here for their ship and mad when they don't dance like monkeys to the tune of their making. It sucks, and Taekook deserve better. They deserve at the MINIMUM a basis level of respect.

You are right that it won't end. Its a cult at this point, for real. Nothing will ever convince them of anything other than what they have decided to believe in. Anything and everything will get twisted until it fits their narrative. I simply wish they would keep it to their fanfiction instead of dragging it into their members lives, but nothing we can do about it

#anon #ask #rants #jikook #kookmin #jikookers

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thoughts-on-bangtan · 4 years ago

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The 1st Billboard Hot100 #1 win Night - a Masterclass in PR

by Admin 1, with a little help from Admin 2

This might not be a topic that’ll interest many, but I think it’s a fascinating thing to look at. We all know PR is a very powerful thing, and everyone, especially someone like BTS, makes use of it all day, every day, in many different ways. I’ve always been curious about different tactics and strategies used to further certain agendas or cover certain things, or steer conversation in certain directions if another direction didn’t suit the intended course of action or conversation.

A very curious case for the implementation of an obvious PR tactic, for me, is the saga of the night in which BTS achieved their first Billboard Hot100 #1 win with Dynamite on September 1st 2020. Some may ask ‘but Admin 1, there was no PR involved, what are you on about?’ to which I say: continue reading, please, it might become clear as you do.

Contrary to what some have taken as gospel, the events of that night and who was where are not as clear as some will make you want to believe. And before I dive into things, I would like to make one thing crystal clear: I am by no means calling anyone a liar in this, and I am no members anti, nor an anti of any ship. This isn’t about shipping, at least not in the traditional sense, and it has nothing to do with my preference of ship either. Instead I want to highlight how effectively shipping/ships are used as PR tool.

Now that that’s out of the way, here we go:

The initial tweets and weverse posts:

As the events of the announcement of the BB Hot100 top 10 unfolded, ARMY and the members waiting and then celebrating, we saw posts by Namjoon, Seokjin, Yoongi, Taehyung and Jimin pop up on twitter and weverse, crying and celebrating, sharing their disbelief at what had happened. Jimin mentioned crying together with Yoongi while Seokjin mentioned Namjoon sharing the news in their BTS group chat. Further details about who was were didn’t really appears besides the mention of Jimin and Yoongi falling asleep around 7 am on the sofa together. The thing I’d like to draw attention to here, because it’ll become important later, is that none of those posts mentioned Jungkook.

The celebratory vlive:

The entirety of the vlive isn’t really all that important to this, the only thing I’d like to highlight is what Taehyung said, being this:

1st the live translation version:

How vlive editors translated it:

Regardless which version you “prefer”, it boils down to Taehyung being too lazy to go to Jimin and instead asking Jimin to come to him so they can sleep next to each other/together, and Jimin calling Tae while crying and telling him about their #1. The only drastic difference would be word choice on whether Tae meant his room or his apartment, as people argue that “my place” is ambiguous but I’d say it was meant as his room (most likely within the dorm) since otherwise it wouldn’t make sense for him to ask Jimin to come to him halfway across the city in the middle of the night. But, whether or not that interpretation is correct or not isn’t really even all that important for this masterclass in PR.

The only thing you need to keep in mind is the implications of his words: Taehyung wanted Jimin to come to him so they could sleep next to each other/together.

The press conference:

Now this is where things get very interesting and where PR comes into play. The interesting thing to note is that Jungkook spoke about how he found out about their #1 first, while Jimin spoke about it much later.

So, what did Jungkook say?

Basically he found out about the news not from the group chat, which we know is where Namjoon had posted about the news, and also not from another member. No, according to him, he found the news online and wasn’t even sure if he could believe it. This is important so remember that.

Now, the final piece that’s important to this is what Jimin said, who spoke about the night about 11 minutes later. The relevant part is this:

To summarize, Jimin found out around 4 am, stayed up crying until about 7 am which is when he fell asleep from exhaustion. The most interesting part in all of this is that he starts out by recounting the events using “I”, “I was basically crying...” and “I was really shocked” and yet suddenly, despite having told us the entire timeline of his night already, he mentions being with Jungkook and his sentences switch to “we” and he briefly recounts the night again but changing the story to “we” instead of “I”. Interesting.

Masterclass in PR:

Now that we have all three pieces of the puzzle, here is why this is a brilliant masterclass in PR. Timeline wise we have Taehyung’s initial story of wanting to spend the night with Jimin and Jimin calling him, this indicating that they were most likely at least in the same apartment (keep in mind their dorm is gigantic so it makes sense for them to call and text even while both are at home).

This was very controversial, going as far as causing fights between ARMYs and even accusations being thrown at our wonderful translators on twitter that they mistranslated his words, even though all of them basically translated Taehyung’s words in an identical manner (many of these translations though are now gone, or at least I’m unable to find them). What that means? Portions of ARMY rejected his version of the story.

Up next is what Jungkook said, that he found out online without the mention of any members or any indication that he’d seen their GC. I think here is where a mistake happened. Based on what Jimin said later in the press conference, this seems like a deviation from the plan. But, regardless if that is true or not, his words were completely ignored by basically everyone, and especially those who rebelled against what Tae said in their vlive.

Now, here is where the magic happens. What do you do when you have a loud portion of the fandom being displeased with the story of how an event went down, when a member of the group you do PR for might’ve told a story too true and private, or when a member of said group inadvertently revealed he might’ve not actually been with any of the other members but somewhere else completely? You use the wonderful tool of shipping to draw attention away from the thing that doesn’t fit, and instead give the people what they want. And that is what Jimin did. By saying “I was with Jungkook”, despite not having mentioned him in the night itself nor in the vlive, he completely rewrote the truth. Those who rejected both Tae’s and Jungkook’s words latched onto what Jimin said and turned it into gospel.

And this is PR magic. Give the people what they want and they will forget the thing you’re trying to cover up. Suddenly anyone who doubted the validity of that statement (Jimin was with Jungkook) were called haters, antis, were accused of calling Jimin a liar, and thus they were silenced out of fear of being hated or dog-piled. Because Jimin’s words are the ones that suited people most. Not what Tae said, or what Jungkook did. People wanted Jimin to be with Jungkook, and not potentially with Taehyung, so PR went and gave them exactly that.

We know that in the world of idols the true private lives of idols are being kept as secret as that is possible to achieve. What this whole switch of narrative and the three contradicting stories tell me is that the first and second one were likely the truth, the first story true yet too private to have the focus be on it while the second simply didn’t fit the people either, especially since it implied that Jungkook wasn’t with the members and might’ve spent his birthday somewhere else and with other friends instead, which in and of itself isn’t a bad thing at all but considering JK already was involved in unpleasant press earlier that year, it might’ve just caused another such situation if people were to actually think about what he said. So a more idol appropriate version of the story was created, one that mixed truth--Jimin was crying and awake until the morning--with a white lie--he was with Jungkook--creating the narrative people wanted and covering up the truth people did not want.

And that’s how you do PR, how you change the narrative to cover what people are not supposed to focus on with a tool much more powerful than the truth.

Whether or not my conclusion is true or not, whether you believe me or not, that’s up to you. I merely tried to present an as unbiased as possible point of view at the night and what I think is the only logical explanation for why the events didn’t match up. At the end of the day it doesn’t really matter what the truth is, and what the members were truly doing that night isn’t important either. It’s their business, their private life, something they are not obliged to share with us and also don’t owe us. I just thought it was an interesting discussion to have.

#discussion #BTS #discussion on PR and BTS first Billboard Hot 100 number 1 #Jimin #Taehyung #Jungkook #a masterclass in PR #bangtan sonyeondan

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