#basically I like to break Carth

[sporadicsweetswitch]

Friend is playing KOTOR for the first time. They are up to Manaan and it is the last planet to visit in terms of Starforge maps. Here are their thoughts so far....PART V

PARTS HERE [1][2][3][4][5]

1. Fish are .... somewhat friends? The Selkath looks like catfish and as such, is not food.... or bait for bigger fish 🐟 . Also, you get to walk amongst the fishies! Sadly, no fishing.

2. You (Revan) are the most dramatic person to exist ever. At this point you are literally 'That Bitch'. You are responsible for everything going on and yet you know nothing about what is going on and do so with the grace of an idiot. No wonder Malak turned out the way he did, you were his mentor!! You know, because he is incompetent, annoying, melodramatic.

3. The Sith soldier uniform is soooo shiny ✨️ they sparkle. Also, could they potentially catch something on fire from being so shiny and reflective? Like Malak's face....or Mission's brother.... or Carth (still ignoring you for being 'evil').

4. There needs to be a Law and Order: Jedi Edition show. Half the cases would be because of you and your companions.... looking at you HK-47. And your lawyer is a either a Wookie, a Jawa or a Selkath, or Mission with a fake mustache pretending to be older.

5. Seriously though, Revan being on trial for breaking and entering into a sith base and not the whole being a 'Sith Warlord' thing is hilarious.

6. Screw the underwater segment! It was a Lovecraftian horror. (Also I played the baby shark song during segment. My friend almost threw the controller at me. Totally worth it!)

7. Bastila, I swear you probably turning evil is just hilarious 😂. It's like being threatened by a baby Gizka with resolved mommy issues...so knockoff Darth Vader 2.0?

8. But also, if Revan's memories came back early and they went back to being a sith lord, what was the actual plan?

Have a jedi padawn, (although gifted, who had to have an entire team (*and a tone of luck that Malak sucks and is a traitor) help her take down Revan in the first place and barely succeded at that) take them down again in a solo fight?

The council basically said "Ah yes, let's let our prodigal student guck around and find out with an amnesic Sith lord. Nothing could go wrong there."

[solring3n]

Actually this is my tumblr so I decide the posts so i'm just gonna lore drop EVERYTHING of My oc before i implode.

I was actually very careful making her, I like my characters complicated, as a fan of dark fantasy (ASOIAF, The Witcher saga) i could not miss out the potential of including a world in its medieval state with a setting similar to The Witcher (non-humans are lesser, and elves are an alegory to native people)

Because of this, I decided that I would keep the funky hair and eye colors but will not accept white elves, they are native so they should look native, I made my elves mostly dark-skinned or asian, their language is a mix of gaelic and norse, including some of the old words, im still working on it, their culture is directly tied to nature, though it changes with each tribe, the shared thing between ALL ELVES, is their faith. As a historian, I also unfortunately have Arthurian Legend brainrot, because it comes included in my degree i used some elements with my OC.

Ardhine (A female version of Arthur I pulled out of my ass, I saw some use Arthurine, but its ugly, honestly) is young commoner, who is part of the Indigenous Jedi Protocol, a protocol designed by the council to allow indigenous jedi to mantain their culture and regularly engage with their communities; because of this, Ardhine visits her tribe every other week, staying with her grandfather, a lonely blacksmith. (Im still designing it, but I have it drafted)

Ardhine is gifted and troubled, unlike Anakin, she is not impulsive but she schemes. a lot. intrigue and plots are natural to her. She comes from a medieval world which has already colonized its indigenous people, and thus, the horrors we know are commited. Artie was born from assault commited by human soldiers, her mother was practically a little girl when it happened, constant attacks from nearby nomads who especialized in slave trade did not help the situation. When she was three, her mother was taken to Slaver's Bay, her grandmother and uncles killed, just her and the lonely old elf fled to another kingdom whose marshall wasnt useless.

Artie was found by Master Fay, another elf who alongside Darth Revan, is a relic of the times of elven freedom. At age ten, she was picked for padawanship by Master Mundi, a peaceful and patient man that took time to understand her and love her, he is basically her father.

Part of Artie's religious practices include a rite of passage, in which girls, boys, and children that are entering adolescence present themselves to the gods and are given a tattoo that represents the one the high priestess deems accurate, these tattoos normally represent the role they may have in the community (artisans, hunters), or a destiny too big to avoid.

Artie has the tattoo of the Mother goddess, a beautiful tree tattoo that covers her entire face, her forehead has the branches, her nose the trunk and her cheekbones are outlined with the roots. This tattoo signifies a great destiny as per tradition, she receives a dragon's egg (that hatches). Revan had the same tattoo, now here is where we get whacky, the elves also believe in reincarnation, they believe the Mother gives those who tried but failed another chance. Revan got their opportunity in Ardhine.

They are the same heart, same soul, Revan is grief stricken, all they want is finally doing it right, so they can see Admiral Onasi again (im a faithful carth onasi truther ‼️‼️ come at me). Revan believes killing the sith will get them to the Mother's embrace, and thus guides Ardhine to killing Palpatine and Dooku, as tradition goes, Ardhine must go through a process similar to Revan's, which to her horror (she STICKS to the code, she is annoying about it) means falling deep into the dark (it has always been there).

This part is my favorite, Ardhine, who believes so strongly in the rules and the code, breaks absolutely everything and, as the story progresses, becomes more machiavellic, building spy networks and designing deadly plots and assassinations, getting away with them everytime. Assuring the republic's safety, but sometimes, her plots are personal, she has killed those who wronged her birth family, the separatist general who was in Cerea, she has killed for the clones, for the jedi.

Artie has a romantic relationship with Ahsoka, which deteriorates as the Clone Wars progress. Ardhine and Anakin antagonize each other constantly, as Anakin thinks unfair how Ardhine gets away with her intrigues everytime and Artie thinks he is foolish and rash, both Ardhine and her master carefully plan their battles for minimal casualty, Skywalker does it in the fly (one of her lineage-brothers is tusken, Ardhine has little birds that tell her all. She knows). Ahsoka starts to think her own girlfriend a hypocrite (which she is, and thats exactly the point) and Artie thinks Ahsoka is easily manipulated.

Ardhine is a marine, she is ELITE, combining her own people's combat practices and the jedi's, she relies heavily in her connection to the force and she has a fucking dragon, Valyrax, a beautiful male with black scales, a pink belly and eyes, he likes when the clones give him belly rubs and lighting buildings on fire<3 he has a special zone in the Venator (The Revanchist, because, yknow) where he snoozes and rests. She has a handpicked (by Palpatine:///) team of young specialists sent by leaders of all worlds (we have a Kenobi, and a Organa! And also Cassian Andor and Thrawn!!! Its complicated!!!) HK-47 is also here, psychopathic as always.

[onasii-a]

Okay but in my sith admiral verse, imagine him going to telos to get dustil and their relationship STILL being fucked because "you told me the sith were evil, father. You SHOWED me the sith were evil! Now you're one of them?"

[elionwriter]

MY FAV STAR WARS COUPLE DYNAMICS:

(for the sake of this post let's all just pretend no one dies, ok?)

Anakin - Padme: their relationship started with pure drama and really bad, corny pick up lines and it just goes on that way. Even when they are happily exiled on Naboo with their children and everyone knows about them, whenever they talk about their love or tell the story to Luke and Leia it's always with the tones of a 'larger than life situation'. Obviously Anakin is the drama queen who really pushes it (and is still salty he had to give up his title as Jedi Master) but Padme fell for him when he did the whole whiny speech about sand and married him, she secretly supports this s***t! 😝

Han - Leia: bickering is their love language. Screaming to impose supremacy is their flirting. The thing is, they never bicker for serious stuff, because they actually agree on what matters and get along as a couple, it's the principle of things! Sometimes a friend of Ben overhears them and goes 😱 "I'm really sorry for intruding on this, pal. Will your parents be alright?" And Ben with the calmest expression will answer "They literally do this all the time". It's the silence that's worriesome. When Leia is just too tired to keep fighting after hours of doing so with politicians, when Han doesn't bother to stay to face the argument and just hops on the Falcon again, THAT'S when they realise they are falling out. So they push duty and lust for adventure aside to go back spending quality time together and patching things up. Sure enough, the bickering starts again and Ben is like "😌 aaah everything is fine again".

Din - Luke: they are the picture perfect couple. They literally never argue, at best they poke eachother when one of the two does something the other doesn't entirely agree on. They have each other's back in any instance, support every choice and are there for backup when others want a fight or have something to say either on Din's leadership or Luke's approach to the Jedi code and teachings. It took them forever to actually get together because they acted like shy teenagers on their first crush and Leia, Han and Cara had to practically push them into each other's arms, but once they got there they were solid a couple as a rock. Others look at them and think they are either disgustingly mushy or still in a 'honeymoon face', because NO ONE has such a stress-free marriage. Din and Luke truly don't get what the fuss and all the drama's about. So even though they end up practically parenting the space version of the kids from 'Cheaper by the dozen' they act like parental figures to their friends as well. Life as Manda'lor and the Reviver of the Jedi order can be hell, but together they are just balanced like that and can face everything! They even create a new co-op fighting style for Jedi/Mandalorians that becomes the terror and amazement of the Galaxy for centuries to come!😌😏💪

Kannan - Hera: very similar to Dinluke except they do at times have some small moments of tension because Hera is a fighter to the core and Kannan can't help but wonder if the battle will ever truly end. But his queen's passion and resolve is so bright and steeled that he can't help but fall in love a little more every time and follow, knowing it's the right thing to do. They have an example to set for their son, after all. Kannan will absolutely love Jacen and will introduce Ezra to his son (once Sabine and Ashoka bring him back) as his older brother. Much like when he trained Ezra or faced Sabine, Kannan will sometimes doubt himself and wonder if he's acting like a good parent to Jacen. Hera will smile and reassure him, describing to him the bright and happy smile on their son's face or how Jecen's nose scrunches and his long, greenish ears wiggle in delight whenever Kannan plays with him or cuddles him. As Hera says so, Kannan holds her and feels like he can actually see it too.

Sabine - Ezra: After Ezra is brought back to his family from wherever or whatever happened to him after facing Thrawn, both of them will just indulge in sudden hugs or touches to make sure the other is actually there. Of course, they first think of their bond as a solid friendship and camaraderie, because that's what it was when they left off. The extra touching is just the response to being apart for so long and being worried for each other. But then Sabine notices that Ezra actually looks really good with long hair and the scruffy beard he grew out. She catches herself thinking of how warm and safe if feels in his arms and mentally kicks herself because she's a Mandalorian, all she should need is a loaded blaster to feel safe. Ezra, on the other hand, starts playing with Sabine's hair when complimenting her new dye and suddenly finds himself cupping her face like it's the most natural thing in the world. Long story short, they fall for eachother hard and become the prototype of the couple "my boyfriend/girlfriend is my best friend". When they are comfortable with their new status, Ezra goes back flirting dorkishly with her like he did all those years back when they first met and Sabine will tease him by shooting his advances down.

Ashoka - Bo Katan: joke's on Bo-katan for cringing back in the day at her sister's relationship with a Jedi. She thought destiny or the force or whatever was really messing with her when she realized that her rival and pupil, Din Djarin, the new leader of Mandalorians was also falling helplessly in love with a Jedi (Obi-Wan's student nonetheless). When she hears Sabine Wren and her Jedi boy also got together she stops questioning it. The thing is that she herself has been inexplicably, undeniably charmed and hooked to a Jedi for years now. The very same Jedi she had teased didn't have enough booty, what felt like a lifetime prior. But she's Bo-Katan, she can be in angry denial about anything. Ashoka, on the other hand, has seen and has been conditioned too much on what attachment does to a Jedi, even if she doesn't consider herself one anymore. So, even if the chemistry between them and the long lingering stares are real, their love is always kept a quiet, unspoken thing. Whenever they call eachother "my old friend" they know they actually mean more, but leave it at that. Everyone around them can't help wondering 'are they a thing or...?!' but they never feed the theories and gossip. They know what they are and mean for each other when they are alone in the same room, talking about the past or what must be done in the future and Ashoka's mere presence is enough to cool down the ever-present burning rage inside of Bo. Meanwhile, the other can't help but admire how single minded and devoted to her people and culture the Mandalorian princess is, how she never gave up on them, despite everything. They smile softly at each other, then one of them breaks the spell by leaving. They go back to their own business and life untill destiny or the force or whatever brings them back into eachother's orbit.

Revan - Carth: normally they act very much like Leia and Han with the bickering and teasing bit but then Revan has one of her memories returning or is haunted by how she basically condemned her lifelong best friend Malak to a terrible death and Carth instantly does a 180° shift becoming the most caring, comforting and tender partner. She'll hide into his chest until the crisis in over. Sometimes it can go on for days and Revan is oh, so grateful of how patient and good Carth is to her. Then, at times, Carth is the one burying his head in her chest and she's the one doing the tender, hair strokes. Carth needs a lot of reassuring and might get upset and fret over even what appears to be a trivial thing. He's trying to heal and get better but the long, long years of solitude, hurt and paranoia are hard to iron down. Expecially when Carth seems to have an instinct that puts a Jedi to shame, foreseeing a crisis neither she nor Bastila had picked up. But he is making an effort to improve and she's proud of him, even as he tries very clumsily to patch things up with his son Dustil. She doesn't really step in that matter more than she has to, since Dustil is clearly not happy nor comfortable with the idea of them being together yet. Carth will sometimes open his heart to her and say something deeply meaningful on how he wants her to stay ( when she looks particularly haunted and about to leave without a work of warning) and be happy but does so with such awkward word choices that Revan just cannot refrain from laughing at his face and making puns. It's at this point that the back and forth teasing resumes. There is no denying they are still deeply wounded individuals and they are at their best when their friends are there to lighten the mood and show love to the both of them. Because they could easily go down the path of drama like Anakin and Padme but they choose the Ebon Hawk crew shenanigans instead.

Obi Wan - Satine: their love is stored in the memory of that glorious time they spent together in their youth. A moment in which no responsibility or sense of honor could keep them from giving in to that feeling of want and need for each other. It's a love that never truly went away, never left space for anyone else, but it never fully grew and bloomed either. So years down the line, that's what it is for Obi-Wan, a pleasant memory. He would never change how things went afterwards, but he wouldn't give up those memories and feelings for anything in the world. Satine feels the same, mostly. There are nights that she falls asleep wondering what could have been if only she had talked up at the decisive moment and dreams of a life spent together with Obi-Wan. But when she wakes up, she sobers up and goes back to her things. It's when she looks at her Korkie smile and notices how resembling to his secret father he is that she is truly at peace. She managed to keep a peace of Obi-Wan in her life.

Cal - Merrin: I have no idea for this one, but just stop and consider the possible 'nightsisters babies' though! Wouldn't they be the cutest things ever?! 😀

Sorry Cara Dune, you just haven't met the woman of your life yet. 😔

Also, I kinda like Zeb and Callus too but I don't really ship them enough to add them here, you know? Anyway I'm sure they make a lovely couple.

[darthrevans]

you can fly away with me tonight;

in which we pretend levitating by dua lipa exists in the star wars universe because look me in the eyes and tell me listening to that song doesn’t make you feel like you’re partying in a nightclub in a galaxy far far away having the ABSOLUTE time of your goddamn life… so this is basically just a dumb fun lil oneshot, enjoy // lady revan x bastila shan, 1.5k words.

(i wrote this months ago when this song was more popular, but i just found it again, and it’s cute, and it’s canon to my revan so... just gonna post it here).

The surprise sandstorm which had struck Anchorhead had battered the Ebon Hawk, and the mechanic crew simply said it would take a few days to clean and fix her up again for viable space flight.

The answering groans had quickly morphed into wary excitement: after all, this provided them with a rare opportunity. The crew would have a few days off while the ship was being repaired, and they’d already found the Star Map, so there was nothing to do but make the most of their remaining time on Tatooine.

And so it was that Bastila found herself that evening being dragged into a foul-smelling hole of a cantina, with the few stranded spacers, locals, bounty hunters and off-duty Czerka employees seemingly all crowding in for a night of drinking and dancing.

Bastila certainly didn’t mean to stick her nose up as they entered, running her gaze over everyone inside and gauging the mood, but… Nataya was right. Even if she didn’t really like to admit it.

“Come on, Bastila! When else are we ever going to get a chance to relax like this?” Nataya’s dark eyebrow had raised knowingly, and Bastila had sighed, already conceding. If anything, as Nataya had pointed, it offered her crew a chance to take a break before the more arduous work they had to do once they left Tatooine. The morale boost would be good for them all.

It didn’t mean she had to like being forced into a place like this. But Nataya had so naturally taken control of the mission in her charming way, and so it seemed foolish to insist she stay behind at the ship while everyone else went out with their de facto leader.

They’d dressed down; Nataya’s, Juhani’s and her own Jedi robes all safely back on the ship so they wouldn’t attract unwanted attention, but even still Bastila felt as though she stuck out like a sore thumb. 

She just wasn’t built to relax like this, she complained as she and Juhani settled in at a table. Jedi weren’t taught to…

Nataya seemed fine enough, though, she thought with a grumble as the woman returned laden with alcohol. Carth and Canderous took to it as easily as everything else they did, but even Nataya seemed just as fine drinking Tatooine liquor. 

Well, she wasn’t going to be left behind. She scowled at the strange liquid and took a small sip, gagging a little as it burned down her throat and immediately put it back down. 

It was nice, though, Bastila finally understood, as the hours moved on and their dinner came and went. To get a break, to catch their breaths… morale boost, indeed. It wasn’t exactly the most brilliant move or anything, but the way Nataya knew what her people needed… well. It was nice to be thought of. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d simply sat down and lived in the moment like this.

The cantina staff eventually pushed all the tables on the dance floor out of the way while the music cranked up, and suddenly bodies poured onto it to dance. Carth, Canderous and Juhani were long gone from their shared table, somewhere in the bar, and it was only Bastila still sitting there, nursing her drinks a lot slower than Nataya was.

Nataya was a blur. Quite the social butterfly as a drinker, Bastila observed, bright smile and flushed cheeks as she met and spoke to all sorts in the bar, drifting around, coming back to her always with gossip about what Carth, Canderous and Juhani were up to, sounding almost scandalised in a way that made herself smile each time, amused.

She didn’t know how late it was, but she was definitely in lighter and lighter spirits as the evening wore on, the alcohol hitting her much slower than her companions at her slow pace. 

She sipped, watching Nataya drift around, watching everyone around her dancing, when the DJ put on a particular song Nataya seemed to know, and her eyes lit up, turning to stare at Bastila excitedly.

If you wanna run away with me, I know a galaxy, and I can take you for a ride…

“Bastila! Come!” Nataya was already back at the table, one hand clutching her drink, the other grabbing for Bastila’s hand to drag her out onto the dance floor. 

“No, no!” Bastila complained, allowing herself to be pulled up but shaking her head vehemently at the idea of dancing.

“Yes!” Nataya retorted, but obligingly let go, already dancing to the beat, huge smile in place and eyes slipping closed as she let the music wash over her.

I had a premonition that we fell into a rhythm where the music don’t stop for life… Glitter in the sky, glitter in my eyes, shining just the way I like…

Bastila stared at her for a moment, and then caught herself, blushing. Nataya’s eyes opened, a dreamy look in her eyes before she focused on Bastila.

Bastila simply shook her head, and Nataya frowned at her, pouting slightly. 

Ridiculous, Bastila thought, feeling the blush spread more over her, heating her cheeks. She was simply not having it… all the people who would stare at her… she may not be dressed like a Jedi but surely they could tell…

Nataya sighed, and allowed Bastila to hover at the edge of the dance floor as she drifted farther back into the crowd, eyes on Bastila all the while before she let herself get caught up again in the music. 

She casually, effortlessly moved to the beat, and Bastila continued to stare at her as she sipped at her drink. 

The chorus hit, and Nataya threw her head back and let out a WHOOP! with everyone around her, running her hands through her hair and singing along just as loudly as the rest of them.

I got you, moonlight… you’re my starlight… I need you all night, come on, dance with me…

She beckoned to Bastila once more, but when she again shook her head, she rolled her eyes good-naturedly and, upon downing the rest of her drink, climbed up onto the bar with several others as the beat hit.

You can fly away with me tonight… you can fly away with me tonight… baby let me take you for a ride… I’m levitating…

Bastila had another one of her out-of-body experiences where she was both watching Nataya having the time of her life in a seedy nightclub on Tatooine, and also realising that she was watching Darth Revan dancing on top of the bar in a seedy nightclub on Tatooine. Darth Revan!

She took a long swig of her drink at the thought, trying and failing to stop herself from picturing the Sith Lord in those dark robes of hers in the same place and position.

“WOO! I GOT YOU!” Nataya yelled the lyrics, jumping down from the bar to the cheers from other patrons and joining Bastila, breezing up to her and continuing to dance happily. 

Bastila continued to shake her head, but Nataya wasn’t having it anymore, and danced with Bastila, until she started to move awkwardly to the beat.

“Let go!” Nataya told her, rolling back. 

She still felt awkward, but the liquor was making her bolder, and so she began to dance more actively with her, to the delight of Nataya.

The drinks continued into the night, and with the passing hours they drifted closer, and closer. At one point, they were the only ones on the dance floor, but people continued to drift in and out.

I need you all night, come on, dance with me…

When had Nataya’s arms wrapped around her waist? When had her own wrapped around Nataya’s neck?

Glitter in the sky, glitter in my eyes, shining just the way we are…

Their lips met. Right there, in a frankly awful cantina, surrounded by aliens of all kinds and grinding bodies, to a song that had played more than a couple times that night. 

Nataya pulled back, staring into Bastila’s eyes. Her high cheekbones were flushed, her beautiful bright blue eyes darkened by her wide pupils, and as they stared at each other, Bastila felt their bond sing. She’d never felt closer to her, physically, emotionally…

Nataya smiled softly at her, and Bastila’s responding smile was just as soft. 

They came back together, kisses sweet and right, until finally they left that seedy bar for the abandoned Hawk and a place where they could explore each other more fully, all night long.

[waaaaanakin-crywalker]

I remembered that one post that made like, fic editing/writing into patch notes and it’s actually pretty fun.

- increased number of scenes where supporting characters have interactions with each other that do not solely revolve around Revan.

- Carth actually gets to accomplish something that affects the plot. yay!

- Bastila, while having a dissociative episode and on the verge of having a psychotic break, will now more accurately appear like she is having a dissociative episode and generally unsure of reality instead of appearing merely sleepy and needing a nap.

- made Revan’s respect for Carth more genuine.

- made brief references to the time Carth had to haul Revan’s unconscious body from the depths of Taris’s lowest levels to the surface, only for Revan to wake up, throw up on him, and immediately pass out again due to being concussed.

- made Revan’s hatred of Bastila more obviously irrational and an instinctive result of trauma rather than sympathetic and justified.

- included reminders that Bastila is, in fact, like only 21 or 23. oh my god she’s basically a college student. someone help her.

- increased POV sympathy to Bastila in general.

- made Revan’s upbringing have significantly more plot importance. 

- remembered that Revan is a human who requires oxygen to breathe.

- made Jolee more proactive regarding the risk of Revan going fully Dark Side.

- lessened Revan’s BDSM kink from outright physical violence to an acceptable level of ‘safe, sane, and consensual.’ 

- remembered canon dialogue and incorporated more of Canderous’s actual history and personality into his interactions with Revan.

- made Revan even more sappy around Canderous but like, more chill about it.

- somehow also made Revan way less chill about it.

- *gentle forehead bonk*

[spectraspecs-writes]

Leviathan - Chapter 105

Link to the masterpost. Chapter 104. Chapter 106

A/N: I've got a bunch of chapters typed but I can't post most of them just yet because I need to do a thing on my home computer, and work just started summer hours so I have less time at home than usual. So y'all are just gonna have to go with this one for a bit. Also, cool, tumblr's beta editor keeps the italics so I don't have to go in later and put them back.

@averruncusho @ceruleanrainblues @chubbsmomma @strangepostmiracle thank you for reading, you get a tag. @skelelexiunderlord thank you for support, you get a tag.

——–

Deep breaths, deep breaths, deep breaths. Walking through space was nerve-wracking, anxiety inducing. I am so glad to get the space suit off on the other end. To be someplace safe where I won’t end up in deep space if I fall.

Honestly? I’m not afraid of much, like I will throw myself into so many situations without batting an eye - caves, krayt dragon dens, spider pits, tombs, all that, it’s easy. But if I had to name one thing I am absolutely terrified of, it’s being in space. I’m fine in a ship, I’m fine looking out ship windows, but the idea of being in space not in a ship is my worst nightmare. It has been for as long as I can remember - I guess I read something as a kid about what the vacuum of space can do to a body and that was it. I can deal with all manner of creatures without losing my cool, but that spacewalk was one of the most horrifying moments of my life. Yet another way today has been the worst day of my life. And I’m beyond relieved that I won’t have to do it again on the way back to the hangar.

Carth can tell I’m not okay the moment I take my helmet off, but when he gives me an inquiring look, I just shake my head. Did I want to go out there? No. But we didn’t really have an option. I’m just glad, again, that we don’t have to do it a second time. I’d rather face Malak alone than walk through space again. I’ll be fine, I just need to take a moment before we go back to fighting things. Just to breathe.

Okay. Okay. Let’s go.

Five Sith troopers beyond the inner door. Spread out. And these guys mean business. They have heavy armor that I can’t just cut through with my lightsaber. I have to work my way through it, inch by grueling inch. Bastila whisks two of them into a Force whirlwind, which makes it all the easier to wear them down. But even then that leaves at least one that can strike at me from behind. Can’t I catch a break? Can I just catch one break today? Carth sees me struggling and distracts the one behind me while I take out the two dizzy ones. And when they’re down, I turn around to face the bastard who tried to get me while my back was turned.

I’m done. I am just so done with today. I’ve been tortured, I’m hungry, I’m tired, I’m a rolling ball of fear from the spacewalk, my entire body is sore. When all this is over with I am just going to fall asleep. The Star Map on Manaan will have to wait until tomorrow. With one swoop, I take off a trooper’s head. It is disgusting. Whatever. I’m done.

And that’s all fine. On to the Bridge.

Saul is standing there, waiting for us. Of course he could hear the commotion before we came in. He grins at us. Go to hell. “Very resourceful,” he says, and he looks at Carth, “I assume you had some part in this; you learned your lessons well from me.”

“The only thing you taught me was betrayal and death, Saul,” Carth says coldly.

I’m done. I’m just so done. “Look, if you’re going to fight us, can we skip the talking and just do it?”

“Don't be a fool,” Saul says, “I am giving you and your companions a chance to surrender. A chance to live.” Shut up. “Darth Malak himself is on his way, he will be arriving any moment.”

“He speaks the truth,” Bastila says, “I can feel the Dark Lord's presence approaching.”

“Malak will destroy you,” Saul says, “but if you throw down your weapons now I will ask my Master to be merciful.”

“I’ve seen enough of Sith mercy!” Carth shouts.

“You always did like to do things the hard way,” Saul says, shaking his head, “Lord Malak would have preferred live prisoners, but corpses will have to do.”

A long time ago, someone told me that intuition is just our unconscious mind processing things more quickly than our conscious mind. All the evidence we need to realize something is there all the time, we just aren’t always aware of it. Any hunch we have about something, any reads on a person or situation, all those feelings we can’t explain, that we dub as intuition or reading a room or whatever, is just our minds going faster than we realize. On the Bridge of the Leviathan, there are two Dark Jedi, four elite Sith troopers like the five earlier, and the admiral. Two of the troopers stick to laying down blaster fire, while the other two take on Bastila. Carth has all his focus on the admiral, as expected. The two Dark Jedi come for me. And I feel like somehow, I know them. Beneath the masks on their faces is a person that, somehow, I know. I don’t know how. Maybe I saw them for a moment on Dantooine, they had fallen while I was training. Maybe I saw them on Korriban, there were plenty of Dark Jedi coming and going from the Academy. Maybe I encountered them briefly as a scout. I don’t recall seeing any Jedi out there, but like I said, the unconscious mind picks up things the conscious mind just doesn’t. For a split second as they approach me, I feel a deep seated anger and resentment, but that fades quickly and is replaced by specific weaknesses. The one on the left has a glass shoulder. The one on the right favors his left side. I move quicker than I even realize at first. I use the Force to push the one on the left away, focusing the energy on his shoulder. As the second approaches, I swing out my leg and slam it into his left side. His lightsaber falls from his hand and hits the deck. I stab with mine before he hits the ground. The first Dark Jedi falls into the computer pit, and makes no movements to get up. I doubt he’s dead, but either way he’s not my problem anymore.

I have no idea how I knew any of that. No idea what I saw that told me that. But I guess there’s no time to think about that now. One of the elite troopers is behind me. I throw my lightsaber and it cuts through the armor on his side. He throws a plasma grenade. I grab it with the Force in midair and send it back to him. Flames from the explosion hit him through the gash in his armor. I bring both lightsabers down on him like an X. That’s one down.

As I turn back around another body hits the floor. Admiral Karath is dead. Carth’s revenge is complete. And yet, reading him, it’s like… it hasn’t done anything. Healing is never so simple as revenge. It never could be. It’s pretty basic Jedi stuff - hate only begets more hate. After taking a moment to breathe, to understand, Carth pivots on his heel and shoots the other elite trooper on the other side of the Bridge. I throw my lightsaber at the trooper and jump across to face him. Strike at the weak spot at the neck. Two down. Bastila pushes the last two away with a strong burst of the Force. They fall into the computer pit and don’t get up. All four down. We’re almost done.

The bridge computer is off to the side and unlocked. Just a few simple commands open the hangar doors and release the bridge lockout. The hard part is over.

“Carth…” Admiral Karath? “Carth…”

“The Admiral’s still alive!” Bastila says.

Carth doesn’t miss a beat. “It’s time to finish this.”

I won’t stop him. It’s not my place to tell Carth how to heal, even if I disagree with it. It wasn’t my planet, it wasn’t my family. But Bastila feels otherwise. “No, Carth! Do not give in to your hatred!”

“Bastila, it’s not your place,” I say, “And it’s not mine.”

“Don't you understand what this man has done to my life?” Carth says to her, “Do you know the pain he's brought me?”

“Killing him won't ease the pain, Carth,” she says, “Do not become what you despise.”

Saul coughs. “Carth… must tell you… must tell you something…” He doesn’t have long. “…come closer…” Carth considers it. Thinks about just stepping away and leaving him to die. But curiosity gets the better of him, and he leans down to hear what Saul has to say. Saul whispers in his ear. And whatever he says, something on Carth’s face changes. Like everything he knew just crumbled to dust. “You didn’t know, did you?” Saul coughs again, laughs weakly. “Remember my dying words… Remember them whenever… whenever you look at those you thought were your friends!” And then, he dies. Utterly. Finally. And bringing not an ounce of peace.

“He’s gone,” Carth says. Like he’s trying to process it. Like he’s in shock. “He said… he… it can't be true, can it?” Must be something serious, he looks very shaken up. He looks from Saul, to me, to Bastila, back to me, to Saul, to me again, and back to Saul. “No. No… no - it can't!” Back between the three of us, then finally at Saul. “Damn you, Saul! Damn you!”

“Carth, what did he say?”

But he doesn’t answer me. He looks at Bastila. “Bastila, it is true, isn't it?” She looks confused but he doesn’t believe her. “And… and you knew! You and the whole damn Jedi Council. You knew the whole time!”

“Carth, it’s not what you think,” she says, “We had no other choice! Please, you don't understand…”

He points his blaster at her. “So make me understand!”

“Whoa, whoa, guys!” I say, trying to calm the situation, “Whatever’s going on it can’t be that serious!”

“Not here, Carth, please…” Bastila pleads, “There's no time. Malak is coming. This isn't the place. Please, Carth, I'm asking you to trust me. For just a little while longer.”

“Really?” he says skeptically, “You expect me to trust you after this? After everything?”

“Carth, whatever this is about,” I say, “if Malak is coming we don’t have time. We can get into this when we’re back on the Hawk.”

He doesn’t lower his blaster right away. Glances at me. Thinking. Then he lowers it. “As soon as we’re off this ship I expect some answers!”

“Of course, Carth,” she says, “As soon as we get to the Ebon Hawk, I’ll explain everything. To both of you. I promise.”

We have to work our way back to the elevator, and even though we can take the direct route, I doubt it’ll be as easy as it was going the other way. There’s a lot of Dark Side energy between us and the elevator. I don’t like it at all.

My comm unit buzzes as we step off the Bridge. “It's Canderous. We took care of the guards. We're inside the Ebon Hawk and all systems are go. As soon as you guys join us we can get out of here.”

“We’re on our way to you,” I say, “but it feels like we’ll be fighting the whole way. Have Mission sit tight in the gun turret, we’re going to need it.”

“She’s on her way. Good luck.” And it clicks off.

My feeling was right. Dark Jedi in the corridors. And Sith troopers with grenades. But fighting them is… odd. Every fight I’ve been in with Carth behind me, I could always tell where his focus was. He tended to cover me a lot - not to the exclusion of anyone else, but more often than not he would be shooting the same guy I was fighting. But now he’s not. And he’s not covering Bastila, either. His focus is completely elsewhere. What changed? What did Saul tell him? But also… even if he was acting normally, these Sith aren’t. They aren’t giving it their all. It’s almost like they’re trying to waste our time, to keep us here long enough for Malak to get here. I don’t like it, I don’t trust it. And I’m not going to fall for it. I don’t hold back. As much as it physically hurts, I fight with my full strength, I push with my whole weight. I push myself to my limits. And when we get to the elevator I practically fall into it.

Nobody says anything. Bastila wordlessly heals us. Carth doesn’t even look at me. Almost like he can’t. I can’t even read him. Like he is actively blocking me out. And I could push past it, sure, but I’ve never had to. I just want to know he’s okay. What did Saul tell him? What does Bastila know? And why has it changed everything?

[talesfantastic]

Multimuse: 6, 10, 11, 18, 19 (eek, that's a big one for you! do a selection if you'd prefer!)

-eyes list- Well then... let’s see what I can do.

6. which one of your muses have you been playing the longest?

The longest consistently is Angeal, who has about 10 years behind him. Who I’ve played the longest off-and-on is Vegeta, however, who... probably has another 5-10 years on him.

10. which muse is the most fun to write for?

Not gonna lie, at this point in my life I think I have the most fun as Genesis, for just plain writing. He’s just so bold and confident and over the top. In some ways, he’s a lot like I was way back before things happened and I can relate. In other ways (the temper, the overinflated ego, the violent streak...) he’s very different, but still fascinating.

Honorable mention to Lazard, too, though. I’ve had such a good time as Laz on Tumblr and that can’t be overstated. He’s just not quite as versatile as Gen can be.

11. is there another muse you’ve been thinking of adding or writing for? who?

Curse of the multimuse, we’re always thinking of adding people. My current list is long but I’ll break it down a little:

Who do I think I really will add, sometime in the near(ish) future:

Ann/Ran (Story of Seasons: Friends of Mineral Town)

Canderous Ordo (Star Wars: KOTOR)

Carth Onasi (Star Wars: KOTOR)

Mistel (Story of Seasons)

Shad (Twilight Princess)

Who would I like to add but am unsure I will because of my grasp on their canons, or lack thereof:

Bardock (DBZ)

Ignis Scientia (FF15)

Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

Zarbon (DBZ)

18. would you ship any of your muses together? who?

Oh yeah. There’s only a few, but yeah.

Angeal x Genesis, Genesis x Reeve and Kunzite x Minako

19. for each muse, is there a character you wish had a blog so you could interact with them? (this is long so... under a cut it is!)

Let me preface this with most of these blogs exist, I just am shy and haven’t approached yet. Or have approached and it hasn’t worked out, which doesn’t help with the shy.

Vegeta (DBZ) - there are Goku’s out there, I just haven’t had the guts to approach one. Same for Bulma’s, and his kids. Nothing into Super, because I don’t know Super and therefore don’t count it in my canon but man... I’d love those. OH! And Piccolo would be really neat, too.

Angeal (FF7) - ZACK. Please please please let Angeal find a puppy of his own. I desperately need some catharsis from what a mess canon made of what could have been a great friendship. And Sephiroth, for that matter! (I have been blessed with a Genesis, but I mean, I do welcome more Genesis’ if they want)

Chaos (FF7) - there’s plenty of Vincent’s just not a whole lot who want to deal with Chaos. Which is a shame, because I think I write a... somewhat different Chaos. It could be a good experience.

Genesis (FF7) - an Angeal who fits my Genesis would just... be amazing. Seriously. I would also greatly appreciate a Sephiroth, and would kill for a thread where they work through that ridiculous rivalry and become friends.

Lazard (FF7) - would love, love, love a Rufus, particularly one who would like an “eventual allies” thread because you know that canon divergence is my jam. Also a Heidegger who plays in the pre-CC/BC era.

Reeve/Cait (FF7) - lumping these two together; basically, I’d really like to throw them against each other, a Cait for Reeve and a Reeve for Cait. I think it could really be cool to reach out to a Rufus, or AVALANCHE 2.0 too? idk, it would be neat

Iris (Story of Seasons) - my kingdom for a Mistel! Seriously, even in the dedicated Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons/Stardew Valley rp group I’m in we can’t keep a Mistel. Just let Iris have her baby brother. ;-;

Trent (SOS:FOMT/FOMT/DS/CUTE) - honestly just all the Mineral Town and Forget-Me-Not-Valley peeps. I have so much muse for this man I’m down for crossovers and everything.

Midna (Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess) - absolutely Link, but I’m also intrigued by Zelda, Ganondorf, and Zant

Sheik (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time) - I’d actually really like to toss Sheik up or down the timeline at another incarnation of Zelda. And Link. And any of the Sages. Oh, and Ganondorf.

Ami Mizuno (Sailor Moon) - Zoicite! (Be still my shipper heart) But also, I’d really just like the other Senshi too?

Kunzite (Sailor Moon) - I’ve been blessed with a Minako (though I’m open for more!) but I would also really love Mamoru and the rest of the Shitennou.

Mamoru Chiba (Sailor Moon) - I have been blessed with some lovely Usagi’s but I’d love to see him with his Shitennou, his darling daughter, Helios and the Senshi.

Minako Aino (Sailor Moon) - Kunzite, not just because I happen to ship it but because they’re both the leaders of their Prince(ss)’ inner guard and have a lot in common that would make things Interesting. Also, Usagi and the Senshi of course, and Artemis, who I haven’t seen around at all actually.

HK-47 (Star Wars: KOTOR) - any of the Ebon Hawk crew, either set. I just want to see HK being his ~charming~ self, bonus if it’s with a Jedi or other pacifist calling the shots. Actually, even though I hate what they did with Revan in SWTOR I’d be game for tossing him up the timestream too. Or even further into the movie eras, or crossovers. C’mon, someone needs an assassin droid!

Liana Raine (Star Wars:TOR) - if we’re making a dream list, I’d love a Yuon Par, tbh. And a Hero of Tython. And any of her crew, really.

Revan (Star Wars: KOTOR) - again any of the Ebon Hawk crew (esp Carth or a Bastila that’s better rounded than canon >_>) but really any of them would be amazing. And definitely fast forwarding her to the movie eras. What a difference might have been made if they had known ahead of time how to deal with Sith. Or, for that matter, just if Anakin had had a different sort of mentor. I die for the thought of Revan as a mentor to Anakin or Obi-Wan, Force Ghost, holocron or whatever.

Tharan Cedrax (Star Wars: TOR) - a Jedi Consular (player character) would be amazing, but I’d also love Holiday or the what-if he’d gotten hooked up with a smuggler or bounty hunter crew instead. Seriously.

Duke (Threads of Fate) - I’d really love to see a Belle, because there’s a lot to explore there. Really I’d be grateful for any of the Threads of Fate cast though.

Fancy Mel (Threads of Fate) - other Threads of Fate people aside (and I’d especially love the dolls, fellow Aeons/mages, or Klaus) I’d be really interested on her talking with like, spirits or other magical beings?

---the few muses I left out I have no specific blog interactions in mind for. And again, I’m very well aware that most of these blogs exist I just... am shy. So here’s the wishlist I’ve been sitting on, lol.

[its-sixxers]

Video Game Questionnaire

Tagged by @slothssassin!

Tagging any of y’all hoes (or non hoes) who wanna talk about some got dang VIDYA GAEMS

Rules: Fill in your answers below and tag some buddies!

-Games-

First game you ever played: Pokemon Red on the OG game boy. Hell yeah.

Favorite game: Don’t make me do this. D: Probably a toss up between:  Heroes of Might and Magic III, Knights of the Old Republic (1 and 2), Vampire the Masquerade Bloodlines aaaand Fallout New Vegas.

Game you hated at first but now love: Darkest Dungeon! I found out my gameplay groove and now really really like it. I didn’t hate it before, just found it frustrating.

Game you used to love but now hate: I don’t really hate any game that I used to love (even World of Warcraft), but I can’t ever go back to the Mass Effect Trilogy for reasons that are probably obvious to anyone who’s played it. I got hurt too bad man. :(

actually just recalled and this is gonna be a SPICY opinion: FFXIV. I had a lot of fun with it but the RP scene drove me off really fast. WoW’s Moon Guard gets a lot of shit, but FFXIV was miles worse for general grossness. I don’t begrudge anyone who has fun with the game or RPs in it (there’s a lot of fun lore!) but I don’t have the energy for trying to sift through that amount of nightmare to find like the dozen cool people lol.

Game with the best group/companion(s): This was a hard one. There’s games that have my favorite characters ever but also have some really annoying companions, there’s games with characters I like across the board but the execution is weak. I’m just going to say VTM Bloodlines for easiness’ sake. A great cast and I actually think I like them all for specific reasons. Yes, even Ming Xiao. Maybe especially Ming Xiao, actually.

A game with your favorite ending:  Bloodlines even though I had to turn godmode on for the last combat portions teehee. I just love the twist. :D

A game with the WORST ending: See Mass Effect above. Yes it’s been like a decade, no I’m still not over it.

Best character customization?: HRMST. With mods, Fallout 4. Without - I played Black Desert Online for a whole 3 seconds and it had an insane amount of options but I found it overwhelming lol.

Also putting a cut here cuz long post.

-Hero and Companions-

Your favorite playable character:  Jedi Exile or the Courier.

The funniest playable character: Garrett from the Thief series is a smartass and I love him for it. The Courier also gets some great options, naturally.

Your favorite companion(s): Oh christ here we go. Carth Onasi, Jolee Bindo, HK-47, Atton Rand, Kreia, Bao-Dur, Kaidan Alenko, Garrus, Tali, Wrex, Legion, The Entire New Vegas Gang, Butch DeLoria, Charon, Deacon, Preston.

Companions you could live without: This is a difficult one since even companions I’m not super fond of have their place and purpose in the narrative, usually. I’m going to say G0-T0 and Hanharr from KOTOR 2 as they kept that game from the Best Companions title lol. I don’t play dark side and both of them just felt a little underdeveloped for me.

oh and skadge from SWTOR, fuck skadge

-Relationships-

Favorite game friendship(s): Shepard + everyone, Morrigan and the Female Warden,  Josie + Inquisitor, The Courier + everyone, Sole Survivor + everyone, Female Revan + Bastila, Exile + the new Jedi gang.

Favorite companion banter: This might make me a basic bitch but Deacon. The interplay between goofiness and sadness is just perfect.

A relationship you loved but went bad: Revan and Carth. It went bad because Revan fucked off to the Unknown Regions and left him behind, then we find out why in SWTOR (and they canonize Revan as a dude BOOOO) and it’s dumb lol.

A relationship you weren’t sure of but loved: Kaidan and Shepard when Mass Effect 2 rolled along. Being railroaded into working with Cerberus had me VERY annoyed at the time and Kaidan’s 100% right to also be mad about it so I was like oh god yeah I’d break up too. Mass Effect 2 has the best companions + side story but the worst main quest fight me. (Actually don’t pls)

A character you wish you COULD romance: Let’s list em off, shall we: D E A C O N, Nick Valentine, Glory, Nathaniel Howe, Bao-Dur, Nines Rodriguez, LaCroix, Beckett. Let me do it you cowards.

A minor character you wish could be a companion: Harding in Inquisition, Glory (actually most of the Railroad would be nice), Scout Haylen, Fahrenheit.

-Fun-

Shoutout to a random NPC: All the Jawas in KOTOR I love them. Oh and Officer Chunk in Bloodlines, that stupid, stupid man.

A game you love watching playthroughs for and want to play: I don’t actually seek out more than one let’s play of a game. :V I’d say the old Call of Cthulhu game though - it’s really neat but buggy as all hell and the one time I tried starting it up it ended up breaking real big time. It’s fun to watch people luckier (or more tech competent) than I am play it and I wish I could do the same.

Love watching playthroughs but won’t ever play: My boyfriend and I sometimes do this thing where he’ll stream a game he’s playing and I’ll sit in voice chat with him while I work with the stream in the other screen, so probably the games he’s done there. Most recent ones have been: Metal Gear Solid, FF7 and FF9.

Online gaming or solo?: I looove solo games but I love online more. Being in an LDR, playing games together online is really good. I enjoy having fun with friends, and I also enjoy the competitive aspect that comes along with online games. It really pushes me to be better at things and improve. Usually I’m in some kind of MMO - it’s looking to be WoW for the forseeable future right now. Sometimes I’ll get dragged into games like Planetside or Destiny and have a fun time for a month or two as well. :) I had a ton of fun with Sea of Thieves a few months ago too! Living our Captain Jack fantasy.

Why do you play video games?:  More than ever recently - creative inspiration. I like poking into weird games or games with a really strong art direction or good writing. (EYE Divine Cybermancy, Pathologic, Sunless Seas/Skies, Cultist Simulator, Dishonored, Darkwood, and Darkest Dungeon being a few of them). I also just really like a good story and good characters. Being able to immerse myself in another world is great. I also play them for that little cookie of accomplishment - beating a hard boss (LOOKING AT YOU NAMELESS KING) or figuring out a puzzle (Cultist Simulator is chock full of those) or surviving spookies (Darkwood big time). Video games are great and they hold my attention better than TV or movies as I actually have to engage with them lol.

[3piox]

some rambling about bioware and gender + hetmances

(warning: some discussions of assault wrt the ‘force persuade kiss’ option)

the god tier bioware romance in my lil ol’ humble opinion is alistair/warden ... that shit revitalized me, cleared my skin, watered my crops, gave me life, etc ... my otherwise anti-hetero marriage institution gay soul loves little more on this planet than playing a basic ass cousland/alistair relationship with us king and queen at the end.

playing kotor so late into my bioware career (before this i’d played mass effect & dragon age & jade empire) i knew ‘my type’ and the moment i met bastila I Knew i was going to fall hard. and i did! she wouldn’t stop talking about our ~*~deep bond~*~ and i honestly thought she was a bi-mance until i googled and saw that nah, bioware had gotten me as they had with morrigan and dawn star before this. this time around, i got a mod to overcome it, despite my natural fear of what a hetero romance where you’re a man seducing a woman would be like

and i’m thinking, as i play it, that you can actually parallel alistair and bastila (and their romances) ... both are similar in age, raised in a strict religious order after being taken from a complicated family background in their youth, and they both have the uhhhh, tries to say this without sounding creepy, virgin territory thing -- it’s just more sexual in alistair’s case (have YOU licked a lamppost in winter!) and more emotional in bastila’s (she feels deeply, for you and otherwise, but has been told she shouldn’t so she tries and fails to hide it.)

with both their romances, you can tease them the live long day, be the more experienced partner, and challenge their concept of duty

except .... you can also be shy with alistair, and he still initiates a good percent of your romantic interactions vs how you are pretty much always the more experienced/confident partner with bastila. you can make alistair king against his wishes for sake of ferelden (and your burning desire to have a crown, ahem) but it’s about him achieving something -- with bastila, you’re asking her to choose you over her code, and this leads to her fall (but also her salvation, i’m not that extra)

some of it just, well, dao is a bigger game and the romances are WAY more fleshed out than in kotor. and i certainly think it’s possible to play the bastila romance without picking some of the more “really, bioware?” options, and just focus on the story i think’s at heart of it (she saved your life against all reason and you formed a bond which, in fighting it, leads to her fall, but then your love -- the very thing she created while saving you -- saves her in turn) but it’s clear that they had a certain narrative in mind while writing it because the most straightforward relationship path involves more pushing than myself or any other woman is likely comfortable with

this culminates, imo, in the ‘climactic scene’ (pun unintended) for both the romances ... i fondly recall banging alistair in morrigan’s open-air tent (lol) but like, no matter how outrageously evil your warden otherwise is i’m fairly certain you don’t get the option to ASSAULT alistair. but you can with bastila! it’s super casual, that [force persuade] option and idk if it even gets you DSP like what the goddamn hell (and even if it does, ‘it’s meant to be evil’ doesn’t excuse its presence esp since you can play an otherwise LS revan and pick it) .............. it just goes to show that by virtue of being a woman bastila is ‘fair game’ and it’s such a toxic, heterosexual, patriarchal mentality to take.

(sidenote: basically the only truly ‘good guy’ option in the climactic scene with bastila is to say ‘i understand’ and accept the break up, and you can still be like ‘i love you’ on the star forge & she’ll say the same. the option where you say ‘you know i’m right’ is probably the second-best option, but like, ergh.)

ultimately, alistair is treated like an equal party in your relationship the way that bastila isn’t always (caveat to say she does initiate all your big relationship discussions) and with bastila you can really see just how nasty this ‘man want woman’ narrative can get and #bastiladeserves better

tl;dr: a) s/o to all my lesbians who will never get over their deep and abiding love of alistair and b) as said lesbian i AM going to play as a woman and romance bastila properly because my girl deserves some kindness & love also c) p.s. i think this also reveals a striking issue with STAR WARS romances too i’m looking @ han and leia especially you can’t tell me their relationship pattern isn’t all over revan/bastila and even revan/carth too

[sapphic-quarian]

Bioware and wlw

(No pics since I’m on mobile..booo) So, we’ve all probably seen Cora Harper at this point. And she is pretty! She worked with asari commandos! She’s a romance option! Yay! But there’s one thing I’m wondering (besides her possible relationship to the Illusive Man). Is she just a romance just for BroRyder, or can SisRyder romance her too? Considering Bioware’s history with characters like her, she probably can’t. Now, going just by appearances and the little we know about her, Cora seems queer. She’s got that whole “shaved side” look that screams “butch” (not trying to say all wlw are butch or all girls that look like that are wlw, Cora’s appearance is just similar to stereotypical perceptions of a lesbian.) She is also connected to the asari, which are a LITERAL RACE OF BISEXUAL WOMEN. But let’s look at wlw in bioware’s past games.

I’m gonna start with Jack, cause I played ME2 recently and feelings about Jack are fresh in my mind. Jack is a badass. The galaxy’s strongest biotic, a master criminal, and also a bisexual woman. “But Kate,” you cry, “Jack was only a romance option for male Shep!” Yes, yes she was. But if you talk to Jack about her criminal past, she mentions a couple she used to “share a bed with.” So Jack has canonically had a relationship with a woman. A poly relationship with her and man, but still. And let’s take a look at Jack’s appearance. Like Cora, she has masculine look to her, with the shaved head and bound breasts. Jack would not be out of place at a gay bar. And yet, she’s still presented as exclusively heterosexual, and rebuffs a female shep’s advances.

And, going back to Bioware’s early days, their very first non-heterosexual romance, is Juhani, from Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. Juhani is a “romance”, but her feelings towards a female PC are only vaguely referenced in one conversation, as opposed to the fleshed-out romances male and female PCs get with Bastilla and Carth, respectively. Now, this has a simple explanation. This game was co-developed with LucasArts. George Lucas was vehemently against any queer characters in Star Wars, and had his fair share of complaints about Han/Luke fanfics back in the day (they published gay fanfic in magazines! Respect.) So Juhani’s treatment is more the best Bioware could do while still meeting LucasArt’s wishes than intentional portrayal of f/f relationships as meaningless.

And then we come to the asari! Everyone loves the asari right? It’s a race of sexy blue bisexual women! While I could write a whole other meta on the asari and femininity, right now I’ll focus on their sexuality. Liara T'Soni, in Mass Effect 1, is the only bisexual romance, being available to both genders of Shep. But the femshep version has one big difference. Liara assures Shepard that their relationship is okay, because asari are a monogendered, female-presenting race. She’s basically saying “I’m not REALLY a woman, so it’s totally not gay if we kiss each other.” When i heard that, I went back and romanced Kaidan instead. I did not need to go through this feeling like my sexuality was being invalidated. And Samara in Mass Effect 2 is no better. While both genders of Shepard are rejected when attempting to romance her, Samara serves as a weird cautionary tale-thing to asari. She was the product of a marriage between two asari, and she married another asari who also had two asari parents. Their daughters were asari afflicted with a genetic condition, known as Ardat-Yakshi, that caused them to consume their partner’s nervous systems when they mated. Two of her daughters agreed to basically become prisoners-slash-nuns, but one of them escaped. Samara’s loyalty mission involves you tracking the third daughter down, and killing her. Morinth, the third daughter, is a textbook example of the perception of wlw as predatory. She’s literally a space vampire in a leather catsuit. You find a journal from her latest victim, a girl named Nef, and she describes how Morinth seduced her, implies Morinth convinced her to take drugs, and eventually killed her. Once you find Morinth, you then have to seduce her. Then, her mother kills her, or you recruit her. If you recruit her, she flirts with Shepard and you can eventually sleep with her. Of course, your nervous system melts. The idea of the Ardat-Yakshi only being born through a union of two asari makes no sense from an evolutionary point of view. In their home world, asari are the only sapient species, therefore it makes no sense to have breeding with other species being a safer option. The only way it would make sense is if they evolved alongside another sentient species. Basically, asari are all feminine, and they are discouraged from beginning and given consequences for having a relationship with another asari. The idea that cross-species relationships are healthier kind of gives off the “a child with two moms can’t develop well argument.” Then we move to Kelly Chambers. Kelly is your yeoman in Mass Effect 2. Basically, she tells you when your squadmates want to talk to you and when you have mail. She’s also the closest thing the game has to a same-sex romance. Kelly’s pan, and she’ll take all kinds. She frequently gushes about how attractive the alien members of the crew are, and Shepard can lightly flirt with her throughout the game. At a certain point, you can invite Kelly to Shepard’s cabin for dinner. A brief scene of her dancing for Shepard and cuddling ensues, and that’s it. No achievement, no other conversations, nothing. It doesn’t even conflict with existing romances. You can be romancing someone and still invite Kelly upstairs. Her only function, besides informing you about who you need to talk to and that brief moment, is being dissolved by the Collectors if you don’t come for the crew right after they’re taken. She plays a smaller role in the third game, where you can either get her killed, convince her to change her identity, or convince her to change her identity and start a relationship, which only adds a few conversations and the inability to romance anyone else. Then, there’s Samantha Traynor. Samantha’s a lesbian and the Normandy’s comm specialist in Mass Effect 3. She serves the same purpose as Kelly in Mass Effect 3 (informing you about mail and missions) except she can be romanced only by a female Shepard, and she has a full, fleshed out romance. My only complaint about Traynor is that she should have been introduced earlier. She was a good character and I would have liked to see her in more than one game. Now, we go to Bioware’s other cash cow franchise: Dragon Age. Specifically, Dragon Age Origins. Our female love interest for a female Warden is Leliana, a spy-turned-nun. Admittedly, Leliana is a pretty good character in terms of representation. She’s not predatory or overly violent in terms of our setting. However, there’s her former mentor, Marjolaine. Marjolaine embodies the predatory, manipulative wlw stereotype, as shown when she had a relationship with the sixteen-year-old Leliana. Marjolaine’s age is not stated, but she is older than Leliana by a good amount seeing as she had been married once before meeting Leliana. She groomed Leliana into becoming a bard, which in Dragon Age is a spy who can also double as an assassin. She then betrays Leliana and frames her for treason. Later, when Leliana asks the Warden to check up on Marjolaine, Marjolaine plays the victim, and tries to convince the Warden Leliana is not to be trusted. In Dragon Age II, we have two bisexual female characters, Isabella and Merrill. Both are great characters with facets and unique flaws. Honestly, there’s nothing negative to say about them as bisexual women. In Dragon Age Inquisition, we have a trio of lesbian characters. Sera is an elf who’s part of a vigilante group called the Friends of Red Jenny. While Sera is on your side, if a female elf inquisitor tries to pursue a romance with her, it gets a little difficult. Sera berates the inquisitor for being “too elfy”, and at one point breaks off the relationship if they don’t admit the eleven gods were demons. None of the other romances have something like this, where one choice can ruin the relationship, so why does Sera’s romance get it? There’s also Celene and Briala. Celene is the empress of Orlais, which is Dragon Age’s equivalent to France. There’s no other way of putting this, so I’m just gonna say it. Celene is a racist manipulative bitch. She oppresses the elves of Orlais, hurls racist insults towards her handmaiden and lover, Briala, and actually had Briala’s parents killed to maintain her grip on the throne. So, yeah, not a nice lady. But what’s the happy ending of the segment she and Briala appear? Getting them back together! Briala had left her after she did nothing for her people, the elves, and because she couldn’t take Celene’s abuse anymore. I will give Inquisition this, it’s bisexual women, Harding and Josephine, are better written. And in Dragon Age II and Inquisition, last but not least, there’s Cassandra Pentaghast. She’s only available to a male Inquisitor in Inquisition. However, depending on how far you take it, she actually can gain approval from a female Inquisitor’s flirting. “But Kate,” you say again, “Cassandra probably just think’s the Inquisitor’s joking and rejects you when you go too far!” we see in her romance with a male Inquisitor that’s she’s a romantic at heart. Flowers, candles, poetry and all that mushy stuff. She’s probably rejecting a female Inquisitor if she flirts too much, cause she wants a fairytale romance. Also, have you seen Cassandra? For the same reasons as Jack and Cora, that’s a gay if I ever saw one. So that’s why I don’t have too much hope in Cora being a bi romance. Just related to Bioware’s track record of including wlw. We can still dream tho. (In case someone asks why I didn’t include mlm in this meta too, as they arguably receive worse treatment in Bioware games 1. I am not a man attracted to other men, so I would feel like I was talking over actual mlm, and 2. This is already long enough. This was just supposed to cover Cassandra and Jack but I got carried away.)

[spectraspecs-writes]

Korriban - Chapter 94

Link to the masterpost. Chapter 93. Chapter 95.

@averruncusho @ceruleanrainblues @chubbsmomma @strangepostmiracle thank you for reading, you get a tag. @skelelexiunderlord thank you for support, you get a tag.

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This tomb looks significantly newer than Ajunta Pall’s, and there’s text that I can actually read so it must be recent enough. It’s not Galactic Basic, but it’s not some long-dead language, either. This is the tomb of Tulak Hord, a lightsaber specialist by the look of it. So definitely more recent than Ajunta Pall, who didn’t have a lightsaber. This is the tomb where I met Lashowe, though, that’s going to have consequences as far as the tuk’ata population is concerned. Without the matriarch, there may be infighting to establish a new matriarch, or a daughter may have stepped up that isn’t fit to rule the pack. In an ideal world the pack would just go on as normal but when is it ever an ideal world?

This tomb is a little brighter than Ajunta Pall’s, but still pretty dark. There’s more to it, too - Ajunta Pall’s was a straight shot with a trick along the way. This tomb is from a different era, and relies on twists and turns as well as tricks to keep looters at bay. But we are not the first to proceed this way, and a bit of a trail has been marked by dark splotches on the walls. No, they’re not blood - even if the Sith were that weird, you’d have to carry the blood through the tomb and that would drive the tuk’ata nuts. That’s a death wish kind of thing to do. But the splotches are high enough on the wall that the tuk’ata couldn’t reach, and too regular to be natural. I can handle if it’s a trap of some kind.

The tuk’ata are not composed at all, which is what I expected. When we run across a few, they don’t attack in a uniform fashion. It’s sloppy, uncoordinated, and they don’t attack as a unit. Damn you, Lashowe, you ruined the pack dynamics. Most of them I can just scare off, but we do have to kill a few along the route marked off for us.

The route dead ends near an ancient console, sort of like the ones in the ruins on Dantooine. They said the Star Map was in Naga Sadow’s tomb, so what is this doing here? I hit a button. It still works and it displays in Basic. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Jolee says.

“Yeah, me too,” I say, “but I think we can get ourselves out of any trouble.” I use the console to open the door.

“I dread the day you’re wrong about that.”

“Yeah, me too.”

We step through and are met with another closed door as the one behind us closes. Something… smells awful. Is the room spinning? Oh, shit, poison gas. Carth… is Carth okay?

Jesus, that knocked the wind out of me. I feel like there’s a Reek sitting on my chest. I try to look around. I’m not in the chamber anymore. Looks like the crypt. Carth - where’s Carth? He’s still out cold. Jolee’s conscious but pretending he’s not. Which he would only do if he got some benefit out of it. Something smells again. But not like poison, more like sweat. Someone here has not bathed in days, minimum, and it’s none of us.

“Awake already, are you?” Sounds like a kookier old man than Jolee, who I can actually hear huff in my head. Ah, he knows I love him. “Good!” I try to get a better look at this crusty old dude. He’s got the same grayish skin as Master Uthar, but way more crazed. “This is the tomb of Sith Lord Tulak Hord, if you don't know. I've taken up residence here, for now… it's dusty and full of critters, but it's home.”

I try and fail to sit up a bit. “Not that I don’t get the sentiment, because I would love to swap stories about dusty critter homes, but who are you and why the hell am I here?”

“Ah, yes!” he exclaims, “Introductions of course! I suppose it is time, isn't it?” Anyone like this who hasn’t had twelve cups of caff is certifiably cuckoo for Core Puffs. (Hell, even if you have had twelve cups of caff, I’d still be worried about you being a responsible adult alone.) “This other student here that I captured earlier you should know well enough. His name is Mekel. Say hello, Mekel.”

God, he looks awful! He tries to mumble something at me but can’t. From what I can tell he’s got loads of fresh electrical scarring, and I don’t think he got it playing with wires. “Poor lad,” the kook says with mock sympathy, “He's had a hard day. My name is Jorak Uln. I was once the head of the academy, so I'm sure you've heard of me.”

“Yeah, I heard you went nuts and ran for the hills.”

He blusters and can’t managed to get a single comprehensible word out, except for “stupid Uthar”, before moving on. “Anyway…” he says, trying not to release his anger on me yet, “I'd like to propose that we move onto the main event. You see, I'd like to discover if you've got the pluck of an old-fashioned Sith. Most of the drek Uthar has been passing through these days is so pathetic. Take young Mekel here… I already tested him. Didn't I, Mekel?” Mekel mumbles again, and Jorak Uln laughs. “Yes, yes, you're welcome. You see, Mekel here has the cruel disposition of a Sith,” - which doesn’t surprise me - “but not the gumption that I'm looking for.”

Well, he’s definitely lost it, and needs clinical help finding it. But that’s not going to get me out of here. “So what happens if I pass your test?”

“Why, then, you go free!” Bingo! “Tell you what… I'll even pass onto you my own personal thesis on ancient Sith philosophies. They're based on all I've learned studying Tulak's tomb. It'll make you a better Sith, I'm sure.” Which is not something I’m looking for. “The chances of you passing, however, are sadly remote.”

I like my chances, actually. “Let’s get this over with.”

“Now, now, is that any kind of attitude to take with higher education?” In my experience, yes. “I'm doing you a favor, really. So, then! This is how it goes: I'm going to pose a moral question to you. Get it right, and I torture Mekel. Get it wrong, and I torture you.” You can’t answer a moral question right or wrong, they’re opinions. But you know what, I don’t think that concerns him. “Mekel, here, is a bit weak… he probably won't be able to take much more punishment.” No, that’s some bad scarring, like “seek help now” scarring. “Mind you… get too many wrong and you'll die, yourself.” I’ve got a pretty high tolerance for electricity like that, but if it’s anything like how I was shocked earlier… I don’t want that again. But I can’t kill Mekel, either. He’s trash, sure, but he’s young trash. He could grow out of his trashiness if he’s given a push in the right direction. “I don't know what you think of Mekel. Maybe you don't like him. Maybe you think he deserves to be murdered? Well, here's your chance. Fair enough?” Okay, I can take some damage, how much can Mekel take? Trying to calculate all this in my head, work out my angles. When I don’t respond, Jorak Uln talks again. “Well, then! Any last comments before we begin, Mekel?”

Mekel looks over at me, he can see the wheels turning in my head. He grunts and says, “We can... both survive... attack him together!”

“Now, now, dear lad,” Uln says, “Do you really think your friend here will answer questions wrong just to spare little you, risking her own life? And how many correctly-answered questions before you die, hmmm? No, don't be silly… you had your chance, remember? On that note, let's begin!

“Now, then. Your immediate superior amongst the Sith is an effective commander and a fine leader. He trusts you and you like him. You see an opportunity to kill him. What do you do?”

A Sith would answer that they’d kill him and take power. But I have to be strategic about this to get both of us out alive. Let’s answer this one honestly. “I do nothing. He’s a good leader.”

“Incorrect!” Yeah, I know. “What sort of thinking is that? If all the Sith thought as you did, we would all be soft like the Jedi.” You’d also have a military that wasn’t built on fear and cruelty, but that must be too much to ask. “Ah, well. It is time for your punishment.” Oh, good God! Fuck!

But it’s over quick enough, thankfully, and he moves on to the next question. “And so we come to round two. You come across a group of humans who are threatened by dangerous animals. They plead for help, offering you a reward. What do you do?”

Hell, I’d help them without a reward. A Sith would take the reward and leave them. But I need a breather before I get shocked again. I give Mekel an apologetic look before I answer. “I take the reward and leave them to die.”

“Correct! The humans would no doubt just be preyed upon by something else, later.” Assuming I just left them. “Stand up for yourself, I say! We're not Jedi shepherds, after all.” He looks at Mekel. “Sadly, Mekel, the ingenuity of your fellow student is your loss. This is going to hurt.” Even as Mekel writhes in pain, I can’t help but be grateful it isn’t me. Even as his skin breaks and more scars ripple across.

Third question. “Let's see… ah, yes. You discover an aspect of the Force that gives you great power. Do you share it and strengthen the Sith as a whole or keep it to yourself?”

A Sith answer, as well as a scout’s answer, is to keep it to yourself. You always keep an advantage to keep yourself afloat at the end. For me it’s a hot springs on Utapau. The people there are fair traders and welcoming of outsiders, soil is rocky in a lot of places but they’ve spent millennia farming there so they know what they’re doing. Wildlife is stunning. I figured it would be a good place to settle when I couldn’t scout anymore. I guess for a Force user, a new power would be just as valuable. But I think Mekel needs a breather now. I don’t want to give it to him. But who am I if I let him die? “I share it,” I say finally.

“You gained an advantage and you share it freely?!” Dude, shut up. “Let them rip the secret from my dead hands, I say!” I plan to. “I mean... 'share it'?! Are you mad?!” He sighs. “Well, you did ask for this. It's for your own good.” Holy hell, I hate this! What the shit have I gotten myself into?

God, I need a break. “Still going?” Man, shut the hell up. “Alright, then. One of your underlings has made a major mistake which makes you look bad. He is normally very competent and skilled. Do you kill him or give him another chance?”

Personally I’d let him live. Let him learn. A Sith would kill him without a thought. And I don’t want to get hit again. Not so soon. “Kill him,” I say.

“Correct!” he exclaims. “Publicly, if you can. There is no room for that level of failure.” Dude, you’re the one living in a crypt, don’t lecture me about failure. “Not killing him would be seen as a sign of weakness... and then where would you be?” He turns to Mekel. “Ahhh, Mekel. The time has come once again, hasn't it?” Lightning shoots from his fingers again.

“Last question!” Oh, thank fuck. “You're about to die. Do you pass on your knowledge to your apprentice to make him stronger… or do you use your last breath to strike at your enemies?”

Just when I think the answer to this isn’t obvious, it comes to me: A true Sith never dies. Like… is that metaphorical, like how people still remember Ajunta Pall, or is that literal in the sense that Ajunta Pall wasn’t exactly dead? Or could it be both at once? Is Tulak Hord floating from room to room? Is there an ancient Sith no one remembers who’s haunting some cantina or something? And what does “true Sith” mean, anyway? What happens to a “false” Sith? Where did that answer even come from?

Either way, Mekel looks awful. I don’t think he’ll survive another right answer. I may hate it but I’ve still got a few wrong answers in me, and if this is the last question, then I’ll be okay. “I pass on my knowledge.”

Jorak Uln giggles excitedly. “Fool! It is a trick question! A true Sith never dies!!” You mean I was right? He laughs again. “I'll enjoy this one. Time for your medicine!” Shit shit! It’s okay, Rena, just lie back and think of droids, they always apologize for shocking you!

He gives me a moment to breathe. But it’s not a kindness. “Now, this is odd,” he says, “The test is over and you're both still alive. Well that's never happened before. Hmmmn…” Jolee shifts a bit. Carth is conscious now and even though Jolee has healed him both are still playing dead for now. “What to do, what to do…” Uln ponders, “I suppose this means you can go, Mekel.” He releases him from his grip. “I'll have to just figure out what to do with our friend, here. Run along, now.”

“Or…” Mekel says slowly, “… or I could use the Force to free her! And we could kill you!!” I feel Uln’s grip on me slacken and finally break. My legs feel jellied but I can still stand, and I pull out my lightsabers. I reach out with the Force and exhaust it to heal Mekel and myself. I hope Jolee saved some energy because we're both still only at half strength. “Seems you didn't think of that, old man!!”

“What?!” Uln exclaims, “Mutiny! Behave, students! I'll…!” Now Jolee reaches out to both of us, and I can stand on my legs again. Mekel’s scarring closes over. Carth jumps to his feet and pulls Jolee up. And now Uln loses the little he had left. “That's it! Detention for all of you! Permanent detention!!”

Uln activates his double-bladed lightsaber, but I’ve got my two out and Mekel has his as well. None of us have any Force left, but neither does Uln, which evens it out a bit. Uln focuses on Mekel, which means I can fight dirty from behind if I avoid the other end of his lightsaber. No one gives me electrical scarring if they don’t apologize afterwards. If he were a droid who didn’t apologize, well, I’d get to retune his power core, which can be unpleasant for the droid. People don’t have power cores, so I guess I have to just beat him senseless. Mekel pushes him backwards onto uneven footing. I sweep his legs out from under him and he falls over. Without missing a beat, Mekel runs him through.

He stands over him and laughs ironically. “What do you know?” he says, “I guess he wasn't a 'true Sith' after all.” He sighs and relaxes. “I can't believe that I'm alive,” he says, “You saved me… you could have easily just answered those questions and let me die. You knew the answers, I could tell, I could see you mulling it over.”

“Nobody deserves to die like that,” I say firmly, “There is no universe in which I left you to die.”

He takes a second to reflect. “Yeah, well…” he says thoughtfully, “… I see what you mean. I’ve never… I mean, I've never been on that side of the fence before. It makes you think. I'd be dead if you weren't…” He stops again, like he’s correcting himself. “… I mean, if you were a proper Sith. But you're not, are you? Don't worry… I won't tell anyone.”

“Frankly, I wasn’t worried, but thank you, anyway,” I say. He’s still quite pensive. “Seems to me like you’ve got a lot on your mind, a lot of thinking to do.” He looks at me wordlessly. “I get the impression you don't want to be a ‘true Sith’ like Uln. You’ve just got some crap to work through. There’s better places to work through it.”

“You mean… the light side?” he says softly, “I've never thought about that. Can you… can you even go back? I've done some… I mean, I've hurt a lot of people.”

“There's always remorse,” Jolee says, “And atonement. That's the harder path, though, boy. Think you can do that?”

“I…” he says nervously, “I don't think the light side is for me. But… maybe neither are the Sith. Maybe it's time for me to leave.”

I take a deep breath. “I can’t believe I’m saying this,” I say, “but have you thought about Czerka?”

Mekel scoffs. “Hell, no. Fuck Czerka.”

“Thank you!” I say, and we share a grin. “Well,” I say, “good luck wherever you end up.”

“To you, as well,” he says, “And… thank you.” He walks away, following the splotches on the wall to the exit.

Jorak Uln did a poor job of hiding his thesis. The ancient stone tablet is resting on the tomb of Tulak Hord, right out in the open. It’s not as heavy as it looks, but I am positively worn out, so Carth carries it for me out of the tomb. “So,” he asks me, “are you going to bother with any more tombs?”

“Hell, no, I’m not doing anything else today except relax with that bottle of Tarisian ale on the ship, I am exhausted.”

“I had hoped to save that till the end of the war,” he says, “but I think you’ve earned it now. But that wasn’t what I meant.” I look at him curiously. “By my count all of the other hopefuls are gone. Mekel just left, Lashowe’s dead, we’ll find out about Shaardan soon enough. Whether you’ve earned enough prestige or not, there isn’t exactly anyone left to oppose you.”

“You sound like you’ve got something in mind,” I say.

He shrugs sheepishly. “Well,” he says slowly, “I guess I’d… like to join you for that drink, if you don’t mind.”

This is a hell of a time to ask me out. Not that I’m complaining. “I’d like that,” I say.

He tries very hard not to beam. God, he’s adorable.

-----

Shaardan is dead at Master Uthar’s feet. Frankly I’m surprised nobody’s moved the body yet. “Master Uthar!” I call to get his attention, and he turns to me. “I have a tablet written by Jorak Uln.” Carth hands it off to him.

Uthar looks surprised. “It appears my old master was busy studying the writings in one of the tombs. How interesting.” He glances at me. “I do hope you had to pry this from his dead fingers.” Not exactly. “Regardless, you have impressed me with your worthy act.” He looks directly at me now. “Even if you were not the sole remaining hopeful, you have impressed me enough, by my estimation, to become a Sith in full. Congratulations, young one… you have bested the others quite completely, in more ways than one I’m sure. You have but one final test which you must take, and this requires us to travel to the tomb of Naga Sadow in the Valley of the Dark Lords. I would advise you to be rested and equipped before we leave. Return to your quarters now and seek me out in the morning.”

“My ship is still docked in Dreshdae,” I say, “Do you have any objection if I got there instead?”

“Go where you choose. But when you return, make sure that you have all that you will need… for you will face your test alone. Go, and may the Force serve you well.”

[spectraspecs-writes]

Kashyyyk - Chapter 67

Link to the masterpost. Chapter 66. Chapter 68

@averruncusho @ceruleanrainblues thank u for reading you get a tag. @skelelexiunderlord thank u for support you get a tag

A/N: Yeah, I took a bit. I don’t like to type chapters until I have them finished and I’ve been writing a bit. There’ll probably be another post break after I get the next few chapters posted. Gotta write em to read em.

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I never knew Canderous had medical skills. He operates the machines in the medical bay like it’s second nature, while Carth applies the kolto patch to my arm. Bastila also brings in another Jedi tunic - Zaalbar said, and I agree, that the smell of blood could make the other local species testy. More to the point they would see me as lunch. So I want to avoid that.

I sneeze again. “That’s what I thought,” Canderous says, “How ironic.”

“What?” I ask, “What is it?”

“You’re basically allergic to the entire planet,” he says, “The wroshyr trees, specifically. Which the planet is covered with.”

“You’re telling me I feel like shit because of an allergy?”

“Hard to believe, isn’t it?” he says, smiling, “Luckily, I know an old Mandalorian treatment that should fix things up.”

“So I won’t be allergic anymore?”

“It won’t bother you as much.”

I shrug. “Well, that’s better than nothing.” Another sneeze.

Bastila comes and hands me the new tunic, and I pull off the bloodied one. (Carth tries not to watch me, that's adorable. Canderous doesn't give a damn, he's already expressed that he likes my body but he’s not all that interested in me. Not that I care - I'm used to being in a lot closer quarters with people I trust less.) 

Canderous selects some dried herbs and a few other chemicals from the cabinets and grinds them into a solution. Then he takes a couple of empty stims and loads them with the solution. “I assume you know how to use these?” he asks rhetorically.

“Drugs - hell yeah!” I say jokingly, and he laughs. I take one of them from him and inject myself. Almost immediately my head clears up and I can breathe more easily. My arm doesn't itch. “It's working already, thank you so much.”

“I'll make some more just in case we’re here longer than the ones I gave you last,” he says.

“And how long is that, do you think?”

Canderous shrugs. “Day and a half. Two.”

“Better than suffering through looking for the Star Map. I'll take it. I'll do my best to have it by then.” I take my lightsaber back from Mission and hook it back onto my belt.

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The Czerka guards at the end of the dock don't want to let us onto the Great Walkway, but they aren’t going to stop me from doing something stupid. Their words, not mine. Zaalbar says that's the way to go if I want to get to the forest floor, so that's the way we go.

Right on the other side are three kinraths. They're like giant ugly spiders (as opposed to little ugly spiders, I know, they're all ugly), poisoning their meals before they eat them. Humans and other bipeds aren't their favorite food, but they’ll certainly take it. But like any animal, they aren’t all that hard to fight and kill, and the Force quickly cures any poison. 

There’s a damaged sentry droid also near the entrance, and I think it’s a good idea that I fix it up. He can go on ahead of us and handle any more kinraths on the walkway. So I pull out my toolkit and get to work. 

“This planet is incredible!” Carth says.

“I never thought I’d see such big trees,” Mission says.

Zaalbar is just as exhilarated. “Can you sense it?” he says, “The wind... the sound... the smells? I feel it all now that we are away from the spaceport. This walkway is new, probably built by the slavers, but I remember the trees. My village is not far from here.”

I pull a damaged power cell from the droid. No way of recharging it here, so I replace it with one from an energy shield. If kinraths are the other problem here, energy shields won’t be of much use, anyway. “What can we expect to encounter, Zaalbar? Any idea?”

“I'm sorry,” he says, “I don't know. It has been so long since I left. I only know the way things were, and many things may have changed.” He shakes his head. I finish with the droid and it walks away, off to deal with any more kinraths. “I must warn you of one thing,” Zaalbar continues, “I don't know if I will be a help or hindrance to you here. My father was very powerful… a chieftain. Perhaps his feelings have mellowed, but if my brother had his ear all this time… I may be very unwelcome.”

I roll up my kit and stow it again. “We can deal with that when the time comes,” I say neutrally. 

“That is what I am dreading,” he says, “My shame was meant to be forgotten on some far-away world. I never thought I'd come back.” He shakes his head again. “I'm sorry, I've taken enough of your time. We should press on.”

“Indeed,” I say, “Lead the way.”

We don’t get very far before we come across three Czerka… oh, God, and a dead Wookiee. With blaster burns. I can hear the Czerka as we get closer. “This isn't good,” one says, “I can't afford this.”

“You think I can?” another says, “Do you know what they get for a healthy one of these things?” Zaalbar gets tense.

The third has far more authority. “We'll work it out later,” he says, “We've got company.” He turns to face us. “What do you want, spacer? I'm Patrol Captain Dehno and you're interrupting Czerka Corporation business.”

Well, you’re the one who started talking to me. “What happened here?” I ask. Since you started this, I’m going to figure it out.

“This Wookiee slave got a little... rebellious. We had to put it down.”

“You ‘put it down’?” Zaalbar growls, “We're not animals!”

Carth had a point earlier, that I didn’t see because I felt like shit, when he said that threats weren’t going to solve this. I’m just as pissed as Zaalbar is - and so are Carth and Mission, but they’re clearly trying to keep their cool - but I try to stay chill. “Zaalbar, please let me handle this,” I say.

Zaalbar protests, “But their disregard for the life of this Wookiee is too much!”

“I know, I agree,” I say, still gently but firm, “I have asked you to let me handle this. Honor my request, please.”

He steps back. “I will do so,” he says, shooting daggers at the Czerka, “For your sake, not theirs.”

“Careful now,” one of the Czerka says, his hand twitching over his blaster, “That growl sounded pretty threatening. Keep your slave on its leash or we'll have another accident.”

“Just shut up, you trigger-happy idiot,” the captain says.

“Do your superiors approve of you killing Wookiees?” I ask rhetorically. I know the answer.

“No, of course they don't. Why would you ask me that?” the captain says, “Are you doing some sort of snap inspection? You're trying to get me to admit to incompetence, aren't you?” Please, you’re incompetent whether you admit it or not. “Not going to happen. I stand by my patrol. This Wookiee got out of hand and had to be put down.” He shrugs. “We'll find another easy enough.”

“I don’t think so,” I say, “I will not allow you to enslave or kill another Wookiee.”

“Is that a joke?” he scoffs, “Who do you think you are?”

“I’m the person telling you to go,” I say, and I reach out with the Force. “Request a transfer. Move your patrol off-world.”

He’s weak-minded enough that this persuasion takes about as much effort as flexing my thumb. “I... I think I should pull in some favors and… get us moved off-world, men.”

One of the others is skeptical. “Uh, are you all right, Captain?”

“Are you questioning my orders?” the captain says quickly, “You don't want to do that.”

He backs down. “If... you say so, Captain.”

“Yes, I say so,” the captain says, “Move out. This place isn’t worth the trouble.”

As they leave, Zaalbar goes to the dead Wookiee. I don’t know anything about Wookiee death rituals, or even if that’s what he’s doing, so I turn away, looking down the walkway. Give him some privacy. Based on the blaster sounds I hear, my lovely droid has taken out several more kinraths. When Zaalbar finishes, he stands once more and we move on. “You say the Star Map is on the forest floor?” he asks to confirm.

“That’s what it looked like in my vision, yes.”

“Come this way,” he says, “The easiest way down, if I remember, is this way.”

He leads us down the walkway, past the bodies of several recently killed kinraths and bat-things, and some older corpses, which we salvage things from. The droid is far ahead of us now, but then I hear an explosion, a metal one. Like someone just blew up my droid. A kinrath or one of those bat-things couldn’t have done that much damage, not enough for an explosion. We round a corner, and some distance ahead, I see a pair of droid legs, smoking, and a Wookiee guard. “The closest way to the Shadowlands is ahead,” Zaalbar says. I was afraid of that.

When we approach the Wookiee guard, he roars at me. “You are not permitted to pass into the Shadowlands,” he says, “Only Chuundar may allow you entry.” He snarls at Zaalbar. “Especially when you bring filth such as this with you,” he growls, “This madclaw has no place here.”

Zaalbar growls back. “Who are you to question my place?” he says, “You follow Chuundar into the arms of outsiders.”

“And yet you travel with outsiders yourself!” the guard fires back, “Speak no more! Chuundar will decide if you are permitted to enter the Shadowlands.”

Reluctantly, Zaalbar turns to leave, and we follow him. The Walkway forks, and we take the left path. “Zaalbar, what was that about?”

“We should proceed to the village,” he says simply, “I’m sure we will both get answers there.”

We have to fight some more kinraths - hardly a challenge by any stretch of the imagination - as Zaalbar leads us to his village. We come close to a large wooden door with another Wookiee in front of it. His fur is black, streaked with brown. It’s quite pretty. Zaalbar sighs as we approach, like he’s apprehensive.

The Wookiee at the door growls at us, louder than the previous one, and sounding more angry. “Stop where you are, outsider. You enter the domain of Chuundar, Chieftain and leader!”

Zaalbar steps close and engages in my stead. “Stand aside!” he says, “This human is with me and I want access to the home of my people!”

“You have no rights here, madclaw!” the Wookiee almost shouts, “This human should not have brought this taint upon our land! You must answer to Chuundar!”

Taint? What the hell, am I being insulted? “What taint? What are you talking about?”

“He means me,” Zaalbar says. Oh, that makes more sense. “I am the taint you have brought back.”

The Wookiee roars at us. “Shut up! You are nameless with dishonor, mad-claw! Yours is a foulness that disgusts me! You and the outcast mad-claw will be taken to Chuundar now!”

Well, good, that’s exactly where I wanted to go.

[darthrevans]

hello! i've been silently observing a lot of the kotor fandom on here lately, and it’s made me want to develop my own revan a lot more since i see other people’s so much... so! here’s an oc meme that i’m just gonna write out for my own benefit (from this post)

Their age? I’d say like 29.

Their sexuality/sexual preference? Bisexual.

Any siblings/Only child? Only child, taken from her family at a young age to become a Jedi.

Their favourite season? Seasons aren’t really the same in Star Wars, but she really likes the rain, and she likes the cold. When she’s Darth Revan, and later when she’s been made Nataya, this is a constant (and when others complain about the rain she just smiles and turns her head up to feel the raindrops on her face. She loved Manaan for the constant feeling of this.)

Who were/are their parents/guardians? Her parents don’t matter to her. They let her go, and she understands, but she has no interest in knowing who they are. Her primary guardian is Kreia, and she looked to her for guidance the most as she grew up in the Jedi Temple.

Their gender? Cis female. 

Their date of birth? Don’t really have an answer for this. Let’s just say she doesn’t really celebrate her birthday.

What clothing style? She wears black. Her robes are black, and her casual clothes are black. This is something that followed on from when the Council stripped her of her Revan identity- they couldn’t remove her style. She likes wearing black and having everything match. It makes her feel powerful. And she becomes a Jedi wearing the same colour that the Council are so afraid of seeing her in. (Basically, she’s like the Anakin Skywalker of KOTOR times).

What is their favourite food after a break-up? The only “break-up” she’s really experienced was when Bastila was taken from her and made to fall. She thought she would have to kill her, before she realised she could bring her back.

Their favourite thing to do after a break-up? Probably find a swoop race gallery to completely sweep.

What happens in the ‘honeymoon phase’ for this character? She’s a horny motherfucker who *will* jump you in the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk (to Carth’s extreme embarrassment. Nataya, please, someone could walk in).

How many serious relationships have they been in? I would say two. I don’t really think my Revan was romantically involved with Malak, but they were very close, and I do think Malak had feelings for her. The other is of course Carth.

What is their nationality? In-game, she tells Bastila she was born on Deralia. I will accept this. It sounds pretty.

What languages do they speak? She speaks dozens of languages. She has an implant that helps her with understanding the really difficult ones, but she prides herself on her ability to learn. She took the time to learn Sasha’s version of Mandalorian, after all!

What is their profession/Education? She’s a Jedi Knight, ex-Dark Lord of the Sith, and Republic hero.

Their favourite comfort food? I don’t think she has one, which is sad. She eats whatever is given to her.

What’s a food they hate? She hates strange meats. (What do you mean this is rancor neck, Mission- I am NOT eating this-)

Their music taste? Limited to cantina music. Gotta love those Bith.

Is there a story behind their name/meaning? Nataya chose the name Revan on the battlefield when she took her mask from the fallen Cathar woman. The Council chose the name Nataya L’hnnar for her, with help from Bastila. The only reason Nataya allows herself to still be called Nataya is that she knows Bastila chose the name in the end.

Something they do that seems childish to others? She *WILL* continue to play pazaak until she wins (and she’s not very good at it, so this can result in many a flipped pazaak deck, or a table, and frustrating grumbling).

What is their all-time favourite TV show? Don’t...really think this applies.

What is their all-time favourite movie? ^

How big is their family? In reality, it’s just her. But in her mind, Carth is her partner, and she can’t think about forever but she does love him.

Are they close to anyone specific in the family? HK? I suppose?

Have they got any allergies? No.

Are they an emotional person? She’s gotten better at it. When she found out she was Revan, she reacted badly. She exploded in all kinds of emotions against Malak, and Bastila, before Bastila was taken from her and she had no choice but to face the reality of her situation. Since that night aboard the Hawk, she shut herself off. Her emotions flared a lot basically as soon as they got to and started progressing through Korriban, though, as that was Revan’s old stomping ground and that was when she realised she couldn’t shut herself off like she wanted. Since Bastila’s own fall, they’ve really been helping each other to manage; Juhani and Jolee are excellent helps in this regard.

Do they get angry/lose their temper quickly? Yes. If you push the right button, Nataya will explode. Anything to do with Revan gets a rise out of her, especially in the beginning. She’s better at it now, but when she sees cruel things, or someone pisses her off in such a way, she will cut you down.

What are some of their guilty pleasures? She loves swoop racing. As her memories return to her, she can’t remember ever even doing it once. And she’s glad she got to experience that as Nataya.

Do they have pets? Do they want pets? She had some gizka for a while. After that; no thanks.

Do they like kids? Do they want kids/have kids? She doesn’t like kids. Mission is probably the closest to a child she will ever have. She doesn’t want kids. She will help Carth with his son Dustil, and that is likely it, too.

Who’s cuddle buddy are they? Mission likes to cuddle with her, but of course Carth does too.

Do they have any tattoos? She does not.

Do they have any piercings? The upper part of her right earlobe is pierced.

What is their hair colour? Is it their natural colour? Her hair is black as night, and it is quite long. It is her natural hair colour.

Do they like musicals? No.

Do they like marmite? N/A.

Do they like glitter? She doesn’t not hate it.

Do they believe in the supernatural? Uh. I guess so. Force ghosts?

Have they ever seen a dead body? LOL................... she’s Darth Revan!

Have they ever had a near-death experience? AGAIN, LOL.

Have they ever broken a bone? L O L.

What are they like when they’re drunk/what kind of drunk are they? She is a bit of a messy drunk. She doesn’t drink often, as Jedi weren’t really allowed to. When she became Dark Lord, she was too in control. As Nataya? Ohhhh man... the lack of drinking really catches up with her.

Have they ever drunk underage? Probably like once.

What is the first thing they do when they wake up? Stare at the ceiling of wherever she was for the night. She then gets up to meditate, and stretch, and focus herself within the Force.

Do they consider themselves popular? She wouldn’t call herself popular, but she is Revan. Revan is the heart of the force.

How do they like their tea/coffee? She doesn’t like the taste of coffee but she drinks it when she *really* needs to stay awake. She’s coming around to the taste of some exotic flavours. Mostly, she asks for green tea, or its space equivalent. 

What do they smell like? Sweat, probably. Blood. She doesn’t smell the nicest. When she gets a chance to bathe, which can be rare, she lavishes in the sweet smelling floral soaps. (Yes, Darth Revan liked floral, sweet smells).

Are they a virgin? No. She lost her virginity to Malak.

Do they wear glasses/contacts? No.

Are they good at remembering significant dates? Anniversaries, birthdays etc? Yes, she is. As her memories of Revan start to come back more, this becomes even worse; she remembers dates REVAN thought important- which can sometimes be horrifying.