#banger beats incoming

[worstloki]

this looks like an album cover for the upcoming single: 'Trapped in a Glass Cage'

[the-physicality]

how to pick an nwsl team:

angel city fc (Los Angeles): if you like Christen Press. Very famous ownership group (politically concerning). The team is struggling but has bright young talent. Beckintweed is in her first season as head coach after bringing the team to the playoffs last year as interim.

notable players: christen press, Alyssa Thompson, Gisele Thompson, Messiah bright, Claire Emslie, Sarah Gorden

noteable injuries: Press- extended acl recovery, Jun Endo preseason acl

bay fc (San Jose/Bay Area): if you are an optimist/want to be an early adopter. a lot of exciting internationals, but struggle to win games. First year expansion team so also trying to define themselves. notable players: Rachel Kundananji, Princess, Asistat Oshoala, Deyna Castellanos, Tess Boade, Caprice Dydasco

notable injuries: Alex Loera - acl, Melissa Lowder gk #1 preseason acl

Chicago red stars: if you want to see a redemption story. coming back from a bad season, USA phenom mal Swanson is back to lead attacking talent. Also has USA gk #1 Alyssa naeher. Lorne Donaldson (who coached Jamaica wnt in the 2023 wwc as well as Sophia smith and mal Swanson at a youth level) is in his first year as head coach

notable players: Alyssa Naeher, Mal Swanson, Sam Staab

Houston dash fc: if you like rooting for an underdog and won't get discouraged. a team that has struggled historically but is still fun to watch. A lot of international talent, did very well in the draft. The team has a new head coach Fran Alonso who just came over from the Scottish women’s league. You can watch the team work to implement their new style in real time. Jane Campbell #3 gk for the uswnt as of late won goalkeeper of the year last year. Lost a lot of players to free agency and is rebuilding with rookies, trades, and transfers. somehow both the straightest team and the gayest team at the same time.

notable injuries/abscences: Kiki Van Zanten ankle/ lower leg sei, 3 players on maternity leave

notable players: Jane Campbell, Diana Ordonez, Sophie Schmidt, Paige Nielsen, Tarciane (incoming), Michelle Alozie

Kansas City current: if you like watching bangers. one of the top teams to beat this season. With Malawi sensation Themwa Chawinga this team is difficult to stop and has a lot of attacking prowess. Has some defensive liabilities. Coached by former uswnt head coach vlatko andonoski. Has signed a good number of u18 players

notable players: debinha, lo’eau labonta, themwa chawinga, Vanessa dibernardo, bia zaneratto

New Jersey/New York Gotham fc: if you like the uswnt. recently picked up 4 uswnt players in free agency. Also just got Ann Katrin Berger gk from Chelsea on a transfer. She is very good. Head coach Juan Carlos Amaros won coach of the year last year and the team won the championship. They have struggled with injuries this year and scoring more than one goal in a game.

notable injuries: Midge Purce acl , Abby Smith sei from 2023

notable players: Lynn Williams, Ann Katrin Berger, Crystal Dunn, Rose Lavelle, Tierna Davidson, Esther Gonzalez, Jenna Nighswonger, Emily Sonnett, Midge Purce, Yazmeen Ryan

North Carolina Courage: if you are ok waiting . traditionally a very strong team, has struggled a bit this season without Kerolin who tore her acl on the last regular season game in 2023.

notable injuries: Kerolin acl (Nov 2023)

notable players: Casey Murphy, Brianna Pinto, Tyler Lussi, Manaka, Narumi, Ashley Sanchez, Kerolin

Orlando pride: if you like the brazil women's national team. aka brazil fc. Has gone from a team that struggled to one of the top teams this year, in part due to the players brought in over the offseason, many of whom play for Brazil. Recently brought in Barbra Banda a Zambian striker, who has been very productive.

notable players: Marta, Barbra Banda, rafaelle, ally watt

Portland thorns: if you like soccer dynasties. traditionally one of the most successful teams in the nwsl with a lot of local support, the h th orbs struggled in the first few games with their worst start to the season ever. Following the firing of their head coach, the team has won 6 in a row in interim hc rob gale. Has a lot of strong attacking talent but is vulnerable on defense. The home field is turf.

notable players: Sophia smith, Olivia Moultrie, Christine Sinclair, Janine Beckie, Becky Sauerbrunn

Racing Louisville: if you want to watch a team turn around. a team that has struggled historically has put together a solid team in the offseason under new head coach bev yanez. Got some very good rookies in the draft and is off to a decent start.

notable players: Savannah Demelo, Reilyn Turner, Emma Sears, Uchenna Kanu, Ary Borges

San Diego wave fc: if you like to watch a team underproduce. very successful for a team established in 2022. Has a very strong system but has struggled with injuries as of late. The home field is shared with San Diego state football and is not always in the best condition.

notable injuries: Jaedyn Shaw, Alex Morgan (lower legs out tbd)

notable players: Alex Morgan, Jaedyn Shaw, Kailen Sheridan, Naomi Girma, Abby Dahlkemper, Maria Sanchez

Seattle reign: if you want to watch a team figure out their identity without US national team players. historically successful team that lost a lot of impact players in the offseason to retirement or free agency. Previously owned by the ol group, had to be sold because its owner Michelle Kang also owns the Washington Spirit. Dropping the OL, the brand got a massive upgrade. Is struggling this season. The home field is turf.

notable injuries: Claudia Dickey #1 gk

notable players: Jess Fishlock, Lauren Barnes, Quinn, Bethany Balcer, Alanna Cook, Ji So-Yun, Jordyn Heuitema, Veronica Latsko

Utah royals fc: if you live in utah. a new expansion team that is struggling quite a bit. First time head coach Amy Rodriguez selected ally sentnor as the first draft pick. Has a racist kit and stadium sponsor. Does not have a full roster.

notable injuries: Imani Dorsey Achilles

notable players: Mandy haught, Ifeoma Onumanu, Ally Sentnor

Washington spirit: if you want to watch rookies make magic. owned by Michelle kang, not afraid to make big moves and spend $$$ for a strong team. Has found success recently. Operating under interim hc Adrian Gonzalez until Barcelona head coach Jonathan Giraldez arrives after the end of their season. Croix Bethune is doing very well her rookie season.

notable players: Trinity Rodman, Croix Bethune, Casey Kruger, Andi Sullivan, Ashley Hatch, Hal Hershfelt

[x-heesy]

SwaG attack 🏴‍☠️

Hip hop hooligan, I never went back to school again

When I figured how to use the pen

On the path of revenge, on the loose again

Rollin' 20 deep with my Ghost Town bully clan

Who I am? You may call me the boogeyman

And if ya ass is fat, we can do a dance

Teddy Killerz steady kill it in the mix

Wicked with the lyric shit, you know I never miss

I ran into a million dumb people in the biz

They said I rap too evil, but now I'm gettin' rich

I don't give a shit though, kick it like a schizo

Another horrorcore banger for your disco

You think you're in the clouds, I will take you higher

Sound like a got a throat full of razor wire

(It's) Time to get dough, (It's) time to explode

How the rest goes, you can ask Dope

Rotten representin', raisin' tension

Nobody in your damn crew's worth the fuckin' mention

You're doin' quite well, it's an intervention

Kill 'em all off, it's just wackness prevention

Centre of attention, mow 'em all down, don't make no exceptions

Don't really care 'bout the house of correction

My fam right here don't need no protection, pay attention

No objections, it's time for redemption

Out for perfection, I'm gunnin' like Texans

Didn't see ya comin', ace in deception

Push this whole thing to another direction

Explosives, I've got a whole collection

I'll make sure you'll get a warm reception

You unaware, incoming detecting

The Master Xploder's blowin' up your section

What up is, I got some rough shit for you suckas

Fuck the police, never talk rubbish

Butterfly knives, comin' for your stomach

The GOAT nigga runnin', the dope nigga runnin'

I want 5 hundred motherfuckin' million

It's that or your children, blow up the building

Now hands to the ceiling and bitch we ain't kiddin nah

The way we livin' there's no fucks to be given nah

Puff loud even better than Cheech

Then I preach like a motherfuckin' Cherokee Chief

I got reach from the streets to the Pelican Beach

We got beats that'll breach through you pussy ass creeps

So what's good nigga, test me I wish you would nigga

Dope D.O.D. you misunderstood nigga

So cut the crap cause I'm colder than Cola

Better than Hova, (Who?) Master Xploder

Desperados by Dope D.O.D., Simon Roofless

@luna---zylum @bigbonzo @boanerges20

[elden-hicks]

the goths gameplay longpost

i had already played with them for 10-11ish days, but i am planning to play with them till the 30th day. the post is a bit long, so i hid a half of it under the cut.

so nothing really happened durning the first days, besides mortimer and bella having alex. and the burglar who broke into their house twice, hence the alarm at the entrance door. after he grew up into the child, they decided to throw a party.

the party was a banger, even drew carey came over (still have no idea who this guy is, lol)

mortimer's getting closer to his mad scientist seat

since the older goths were not at the alex's party, they came over the next day. grandpa gunther even brought some flowers for his grown grandkid :)

aaand the next day, they went to the magic town as a whole happy family. good times :)

mortimer and the kids had some fun there, while bella's been using her charms to befriend new people. literally.

thanks to bella's harassment skills magic aptitude, mortimer gets yet another promotion

she had already proven herself to be a powerful witch by beating the best duelist of the magic town for the gazillionth time.

meanwhile, mortimer gets into potion making at his private lab/bella's magic storage room. his lab emits lots of poisonous fumes into the atmosphere, but as it turns out, mrs. pleasant, their neighbor, doesn't mind this at all... my dansandra ass is in shambles.

well, at least he has a friend by himself now, meaning less ingredient scavenging and making that stupid friendship spell for bella. a clear win-win.

oh, great, they bought that wretched thing. be careful, bella.

turns out it wasn't bella who needed to be cautious. cassandra's been abducted, for, like, THREE times in a raw.

with that kind of dedication, i think it's time to make her a honorable curious brother or something... the worst part, besides her changed personality, is that her grades are plummeted now, cause she skipped the school a couple of times during her intergalactic adventures. her being literally abducted by the extraterrestrial civilization was not a valid reason for skipping classes according to the school's administration.

at least the school also allows her to improve her grades that way. she's truly stuck in the loop now.

bella decided to sell some homemade wines as her personal income. her business is doing good, but she still has a space to grow with her cooking skill, which is ironic, cause she won't cook a normal dish even to save her own life

she's a witch, after all, so she can cast the food right into the fridge whenever she wants :)

ah, good enough. at least the food was actually casted, so whatever. the fire was put down anyway.

by the 28th day mortimer had finally reached the top of the science career! yay! i'll wait till the weekends come, so i could organize them a vacation next time.

[dustedmagazine]

Blues Lawyer — All in Good Time (Dark Entries)

All In Good Time by Blues Lawyer

Blues Lawyer, a foursome out of the Bay Area, flickers like a hologram between power pop and punk, pummeling sweet hooky melodies bloody with walloping drums, puncturing jangle pop interludes with pinch squalling assaults of guitar. The band first came to our attention when the Reds, Pinks and Purples’ Glenn Donaldson gave them a nod in his Listed, writing that “Scenic Route,” “sounds like a real Brill classic put through some noisy gear.”

That’s a reasonably good way to describe most of All in Good Time (thanks Glenn!). It begins in a buzz of feedback as “Chance Encounters” kicks into gear, a bluster of double-thumped drums roughing up its wistful verse and crooning descants. It’s the kind of beat you can feel in your stomach, jellifyingly loud, and it hits like an exclamation mark after every bittersweet lyric.

Like most Bay Area bands, the members of Blues Lawyer have had ample opportunity to consider the problem of income inequality. Their name, after all, references the kind of skies-the-limit amateur guitar buyer who buys gear pitched well above his skill level (but not his credit limit). “Salary” has some of Fountains of Wayne’s irresistible way with a melody, but its subject is late capitalism and its chorus croons about “your shitty job without salary.”

There are two singers in Blues Lawyer, who tip the songs in different directions with their timbres and personalities. Elyse Schrock, the drummer, has an airy, unprocessed soprano that nonetheless pushes the songs into a brasher, girl-punk direction on bangers like “Return Policy,” but allows some K Records-ish vulnerability in others (like “Scenic Route”).

Rob Miller, who also plays guitar, takes the lead on the other tracks, and he definitely leads them into sweeter, more indie-pop territories. Yet the genius of the band is that if Miller is singing, Schrock is whomping on the drums, and if Shrock has the mic, Miller is executing incendiary licks on electric guitar. The songs are always shifting between tuneful frolic and full-on battery, and that’s what makes them good.

Jennifer Kelly

[cynicalone94]

Outside Income Ch. 4

When Intelligence gets pulled in to solve a case that another unit can't seem to close, evidence quickly begins to suggest that the gang they're investigating has man on the inside. But what shouldn't be a big deal, Intelligence is known for rooting out corruption, quickly becomes a very big deal when something goes very, very wrong.

Read the Chapter on AO3 here.

Jay groans as he’s rolled out of the back of the van.

During the drive out here one of the bangers had added cuffs to his ankles, looping the chain around the cuffs on his wrists.

He’s left to crash painfully to the ground. Then one of the guys removes the cuffs from his ankles and tugs him to his feet.

He grunts into the gag but they don’t give him a chance to recover before dragging him forward.

They pass through a heavy iron door in a stone wall and then down a long hallway.

It’s only when they reach a small, dimly lit room that he’s allowed to pause, but before he can catch his breath he’s shoved to his knees.

The cuffs are relocked around his ankles, the chain re-looped to ensure that he stays on his knees.

Which is exactly where he doesn’t want to be.

They’d told Marston that proof of life would be forthcoming and while he doesn’t know exactly what format that will take it’s pretty clear that it won’t be pleasant for him.

A hand lands heavily on his shoulder to press him to the ground, sitting back on his heels.

There’s still too many bangers hanging around for him to try anything, especially restrained as he is.

“Get his shirt off.” someone orders and the hand leaves his shoulder, fingers finding the buttons down the front of his shirt.

He tries to pull away but another blow to the back of his head stuns him and he falls still.

The man doesn’t waste his time undoing the buttons, instead pulling hard enough on the shirt to pop them off. His shirt falls open and he can hear the buttons rolling across the floor.

The shirt is pulled down over his shoulders and arms before getting stuck at the cuffs.

They forget about it and move on, wasting no time popping him in the mouth.

He doubles over, feeling blood dribbling down his chin from a bloody nose.

Another punch slams into the his stomach and he groans.

It’s clear that these guys are more focused on visible damage than than actually hurting him. Which tracks with the expected ransom demand.

More blows rain down, bloodying up his face and hitting his stomach where they’ll cause quick bruises.

And he can’t do anything but take the beating.

Once they finish, everyone walks away and leaves him alone.

He doesn’t know how long he kneels there, struggling against the cuffs in an attempt to get free or at least maneuver himself to a better position, something where he can escape or fight back when the assholes come back.

Unfortunately, he’s still just as helplessly immobilized when the door opens again and bangers flood back into the room.

Jay can’t miss the fact that one of them is holding a video camera.

Here we go.

The video starts, revealing Jay on his knees with his hands secured behind his back and duct tape over his mouth.

His shirt has been opened, pulled down over his arms to hang out at his wrists.

He face is bloodied and several developing bruises are visible on his stomach.

A hand is resting heavily on his shoulder and Voight’s jaw clenches.

He’s really sick of ending up here.

Just like with Derek Keyes three years ago he should have been able to prevent this from happening. Should have been able to find him by now.

Instead he’s watching helplessly as a man approaches Jay with a metal rod in hand, the far end glowing in bright red.

Jay tries to pull away and the hand on his shoulder presses down harder, thumb digging into flesh. Another hand enters the frame, grabbing the back of Jay’s neck to hold him still.

The brand is pressed into Jay’s right clavicle. Smoke and steam billow up from the point of contact and Jay tosses his head back, held firmly in place by the hand on his neck.

His muffled scream can still be heard clearly even with the poor sound quality of the video.

The brand is pulled back, revealing a lurid red mark on Jay’s skin.

But the bastards aren’t done yet.

The brand is handed back to someone off camera and another takes its place.

This time there’s no delay before the second brand is pressed against Jay’s stomach, ripping another muffled scream from his throat.

“You know what we want.” a voice announces clearly, the source likely right next to the camera. “And you’ve seen a glimpse of what we will do if we don’t get it. Bring the drugs to the intersection of Baldwin Ave and 9th Street.”

The second brand, now cooled, is pulled away from Jay’s skin. Jay yelps behind the gag.

“But I’m not a cruel man.” the voice continues, a small chuckle at the words. “Not unnecessarily cruel at least. I know it will take time to get the drugs released from the evidence locker so I’ll give you until noon tomorrow.”

Another brand enters the frame but the video ends just before it makes contact with Jay’s skin.

“Where are we at?” Voight growls, turning to the team. “We are not giving those drugs back because Jay is not waiting until tomorrow afternoon to be rescued from these bastards.”

“We’ve got a lot of low level scum identified here.” Kim says. “Maybe we start rounding some of these idiots up and see if anyone has anything useful to tell us.”

“Forget about that for now.” Antonio says. “I think I found what we need to get Eskalov to open his yap.”

[helenazbmrskai]

Not Alone

Title Not Alone

Pairing Yoongi x OC

Summary University is kicking your ass so you always make sure to dedicate a day for yourself and take time to pamper your body and soul. However, you’re cautious around Yoongi your roommate and double-check the d-day to prevent accidents. You're not a fan of revealing any skin because of your insecurities but it’s just happening to be the day when you are - not so alone.

Genre university au, roommate au, romance and fluff, smut

Warning(s) smut (body worshipping, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, messy sex, first time, virgin reader, dirty talk, vanilla sex, yoongi has a virgin kink but not explicitly mentioned) implication of insecure reader, shy and curvy reader

Word count: 9k

Masterlist

This universe is related to my other fic I wrote recently ’one time boy space friend’ you can read that one here.

Washing the excess shaving cream off of my hand I grab my phone I previously placed on the toilet’s folded lid lightly humming the outline of the song currently playing. The new playlist Yoongi recommended is full of bangers as always I have no doubt his fate was eventually to end up as a music major. I take a glance at my reflection when I was able to secure the new position for my phone on the laundry basket with the top slightly open reminding me that I need to do laundry if I want to have clothes to wear.

I take a glance at my reflection removing the fog that made the lines of my face blurry with a towel hanging next to the sink on a hook realising later that I used Yoongi’s looking back at the sheepish smile that greets me in the mirror I placed the fabric back hoping that Yoongi won’t mind.

An unknown rap song’s first beats suddenly interrupted by an incoming call that the familiar piano version of my favourite song signalled. I smile seeing the callers ID, placing the toner back to its dust-filled spot next to Yoongi’s shaving cream I make sure to use the right towel this time to dry my hands with before swiping right on the call.

”Hey, What’s the matter?” I answer it with a huge grin plastered on my face making my cheeks ride up into a chipmunk-like smile.

Our class was cancelled at the last minute so I wasn’t expecting a call from her she told me while we were waiting for the instructor to arrive that she has plans with his boyfriend Jimin. Only having calculus that day after an exchanged heated curses for our lazy professor for not e-mailing about the reschedule I happily took a sweet nap and made an easy breakfast I normally don’t have time to consume or even make in the morning I was able to get my relaxing time to start earlier so it meant more time for me since Yoongi supposedly took the afternoon shift.

This piece of information I remembered while chewing on my sandwich as I thanked the gods that I overheard his conversation about the shift change last night when I went to get my late-night snack but seeing the date expired on the comfort food I had to engage in a yoghurt instead.

”Y/N. Are you home?” She asked matching my good mood in the background I heard clinking noises of a pan she must be cooking. I insert my head through the large black t-shirt’s hole as I started to freeze standing here only in my undergarments the effect of the hot shower faded leaving me in the significantly colder bathroom.

”Of course. I started my pamper routine. I cannot tell you how good it feels to be hairless. If only my hair would grow this fast.” She chuckles hearing my banter the faint sounds of crepitation usually the hot oil makes overpowering her giggle for a few seconds. I remember the sandwich I ate this morning around ten-ish that did not prove to be enough. I get sidetracked with what should I make for lunch.

”Oh, so Yoongi is working?” Knowing about my only one rule regarding this d-day I like to call it is that no man should be around when I’m wearing this revealing clothing. He only saw me wearing jeans and yoga pants before these jelly-like legs cannot make a debut in front of eyes outside of mine.

”Yep.” I confirm. I take a look at the time I still have lots of time to relax before I should start that assignment I postponed.

I have everything planned out since Yoongi usually comes home from work in a grumpy state he likes to shower first and then he retreats into his room to do his assignments and sometimes he writes a song or the song even could be the assignment itself I honestly don’t know how’s everyday life as a music major. Yoongi is not exactly the talkative type.

My silent activity is helping his concentration and the best thing is that I have the apartment by myself to do what I please and leave the comfort of my room wearing what I please without worrying.

The best would be if I could rent out my own apartment but I know I wouldn’t be able to pay it by myself and the fact that Yoongi and I share the expenses of the bill makes things so much more easier.

”Why did you call though? I’m sure it’s not because you already miss me.” Tired of holding the phone up I place it back where it was before leaving the call on speakers so I can rub the cocoa scented lotion into the skin on my legs.

”Right. I almost forgot. Jin taught you that Mexican dish that I don’t know how to pronounce its name, right?” Her voice fades a little mid-sentence probably changed ears hearing the cooking noises seeping through the background she seemed very busy.

”What about it?” I question closing the lid of the lotion after I rub the remaining cream on my hand onto my neck so nothing goes to waste.

”I need the recipe.” She demands. I laugh how desperate she sounds through the phone. I make my way out of the bathroom I need my notebook since I didn’t memorise the dish I only made it once and as it was previously stated with the help of Jin.

”Hold on I don’t remember where I left the notes.” I arrive at the kitchen area placing the phone on the counter I begin rummaging through the drawers bending down to peek at the content of each. Spoons and forks. The second one where Yoongi placed the aprons and towels my notebook must be in the last one. ”So, what are the plans for today?” I ask while still searching for the black shiny cover of my notebook.

”Well, I wanted to cook something Italian since Jimin told me once he wanted to try it out but a crucial ingredient is missing so I thought about making that one you told me about a few weeks ago at Jin’s birthday party. After I’m finally done with this shit I’m going to sneak into his room to give him the blowjob of his life while he’s playing some shit games boys do and tell him lunch is ready.” The huge breath she took before starting the word vomiting makes me praise her lung capacity.

Finally. The book was under the aprons what a hassle. I straighten up turning the pages when I hear the front door opening and shut soon after. I turn to see the face of the intruder as I’m still standing in the middle of the kitchen with my hair evidently wet from the shower I took earlier only in my panties and a huge ass shirt to cover myself with.

Yoongi drops his coffee-stained shirt by the foot of the couch the angle is letting me see the living room area without a problem but he can’t clearly see the kitchen from there but my relief is not long-lasting as my friend decides to choose that moment to speak drawing Yoongi’s attention to where I’m standing.

”Y/N are you still there? Shit. I burnt my finger.” Grabbing the phone off the counter I switch off the speaker option and push the device against my ear.

”Yeah, um, I’ll send you the recipe via message. Good luck. Bye.” I aggressively push the red phone button at the bottom left side of the screen until the call ends. Hearing my voice Yoongi walks through the door separating the living room and the kitchen to halt his steps when he takes the image in.

It’s not one of those best times to ponder over how good looking he’s after finishing work and how he always smells like freshly brewed coffee which is not a surprise knowing the fact that he works at a coffee shop near our rented place.

He doesn’t wear the shirt uniform it must be the one he got rid of because of the stains today he wears a simple white t-shirt with washed-out blue jeans. Focusing on his face again I see that his eyes no longer studying my face instead his gaze dipped lower and I swear he's not so subtle about ogling at my exposed legs. My legs!

”You’re … early.” I talk first considering my options. A, I can still make a run for it but the damage is already done. He saw me. Or B, I can try to make small talk pretending that nothing is embarrassing at all just to later enter my room and dig a hole with all of my self-pity and scream into my pillow.

”Um, there was a shift change but I finished 2 hours early in return.” He explains this time his gaze was on my face the entire time no more strayed glimpses. Fuck. I should have paid attention to the whole conversation. ”Don’t you .. have class normally this time around?” He trails off a faint trace of blush appears on his porcelain skin. I use the notebook to hide my panty line that peeks out of the shirt.

”Class cancelled.” I’m horrified how my voice sounds so high pitched the embarrassment paints my cheeks bright red. ”Um, I have something to do in my room so I’ll be there.” I use the lame excuse to escape from Yoongi when I close the door behind me I close my eyes as well because of the extreme humiliation I had to go through.

My phone buzzes in hand I suddenly remember the recipe I promised. I write a quick message to her attaching the picture of the ingredients and notes to help her with the preparations. Now since I’m done with the responsibilities I can swim in my tears for the time being.

I can’t believe after months of caution fate decided to take away from me the deserved me time days. Yoongi is probably weirded out by me too I don’t know how to look him in the eye from now on and it’s a serious problem. For lords heaven, we live together! There’s no way I can avoid him without being obvious about it.

I mean maybe I’m just overreacting. It’s Yoongi we are talking about. He most of the time doesn’t give a flying fuck about anything he certainly won’t mention it and for obvious reasons I won’t either so I can just leave things like that. Just acting as usual like he didn’t saw my legs and my black underwear not to mention he is the very first one to see it I mean outside of my family of course. He’s a boy. No. A man. And he saw me underdressed like that.

It’s okay Y/N, let’s see the bright side at least he saw me when I was shaved. Well, that doesn’t help. Not at all.

”Shit. I’m hungry.”

I waited an hour and forty minutes to be exact despite the rumble of my stomach I sat down to start the book one of my friends lent me to read and I’m over a quarter of the pages when I decided enough is enough.

I waited long enough so he must be cooped up in his room slash studio for the rest of the day. But to be extra cautious I peeked out before fully leaving the safety of my room. I stop once I step into the corridor listening for any noises that might indicate Yoongi has indeed occupied his nest the soft sounds of the synthesizer helps me to relax I leisurely make my way then in the direction of the kitchen.

As I flip the switch the room is enveloped in light. My favourite mug is sitting on top of the counter even though I don’t remember leaving it there. I walk to take a closer look the mug is filled with coffee it’s in a light brown colour so it must a latte. It smells like latte indeed.

My favourite drink. There’s a note glued to the bottom of the mug it’s a messy handwriting and I don’t have to guess to know to whom this belongs to. How did he know my favourite coffee order?

”Sorry for startling you earlier. - myg”

The simple worded note even had his initials at the end. Realising that I never tried out his coffee made me curious about the taste. He works as a barista so It cannot be bad. I’m always late for class so I never had the chance before going into the shop when he’s on duty and order a drink from him.

Most of the time I’m saving on it and just use the shared coffee machine. Don’t blame me I’m just a broke university student.

But if I drink this I won’t be able to sleep it’s pretty late. Fuck it. I’m going to drink it. Not that the unholy time for coffee consumption deterred me before and picked up on some of Yoongi’s personal characteristics I think I can confidently say he doesn’t care either.

I bite into my lip while carefully straightening the lines out on the sticky note. After I was convinced the note won’t come off of his door I leave to go to bed.

”Thanks for the coffee. I liked it. – Y/N.”

***

”Can you guys stop shovelling food into your mouths for a millisecond. I’m serious!” Hitting the table for further emphasis.

Rori and F/N digging through a pile of food before our morning class is something I got used to first as I befriended them and it doesn’t bother me any other time but I wanted some serious advice for once and they don’t even stop digging to say well that’s was awkward. Or shit that sucks.

Not that I don’t know that without them telling me. I appreciated the note and the subtle apology he didn’t phrase it like hey dummy I’m sorry for seeing your sausage legs my bad. Also, it would be unlikely, too wordy for him he’s tight-lipped even in messages. I don’t remember he ever told me like a two full sentence in one go.

”Serious for what Y/N? He saw your underwear and legs. Tell us if you display your boobs or something. Now, I would be interested.” Rolling my eyes at the sarcastic remark I steal one of her favourite apple pie sticks for good measures.

”Hey! I was going to eat that.” She pouts but I take another big bite out of it. It’s too sweet for my liking but everything for the even sweeter revenge. If there’s one thing I learned about these two throughout the years of knowing them is that they take their food very seriously. ”Look. We love you, that’s why I’m going to tell you this. It’s not a big deal.” She pats my cheek before picking up her fork again.

”So what happened F/N. Did you gave Jimin the blowjob of his life?” I used a quote mark at the end of the sentence just how she phrased it yesterday. Rori is more interested in that, of course, there’s nothing more important than sex.

”Let me say the food was cold once we were finished.” She chuckled bashfully. Do I have the right set of friends? Maybe I should be pickier about who I call as a friend.

”So he’s big?” Rori asked with a smirk and I almost spitted out the diet coke onto the dining table. We are in a fucking coffee shop for god damn good. Thankfully not the one Yoongi works for but I think he has morning class so he won’t be working either way.

”Please don’t go into details.” I plea and Rori presents me with a devilish grin while picking the chicken breasts out of my salad.

”It’s fine Y/N. I was a virgin too before Jimin. Your time will come, not that it’s a choice.” F/N tries to console me.

”It’s a choice just not mine.” I murmur it under my nose stabbing my salad with the fork before chewing on it without the meat it’s quite sour.

”Yeah. It’s because you and F/N are both have big sticks up your asses.” Used to her blunt remarks I’m not even hurt or surprised for that matter. The busy cafe drowns out the voices of their inappropriate talk at least.

”It’s not our fault that you fuck every man with a pulse.” F/N retorts back with a giggle satisfied with the remark we exchange high fives.

”How do you know it’s a requirement?” Rori lifts one of her brows making us do gagging motions.

”Ugh, That’s disgusting.” I abandon the food on my plate that was a bit too much and we are in the middle of breakfast.

”A person cannot even joke here? I wasn’t serious. Duh.” I should really search for those new friends.

”That’s something I can believe.” The insult wasn’t even spoken out too loud but she heard me all the same and it earned a kick under the table from Rori with his high heels, I returned the glare she sent my way.

***

”Oh, hi.” I step aside to let Yoongi enter, he furrows his brows in concentration if I wasn’t running late I would ponder over the fact how he measures my body by centimetres. I fidget with my earrings but without a mirror, it’s a difficult task to carry out.

”I thought we’re going to meet with the guys at 8.” Realising the motive behind his stare I nod furiously.

”Yeah. But Rori accepted that guy’s offer to taste wines and she’s afraid she’s going to be abducted so me and F/N will accompany her.” I tell him and he doesn’t seem pleased I wasn’t either at first but I hope he won’t do anything with three girls there.

”Be careful. Anyone else knows about this?” He asks with evident worry lacing his voice he steps closer helping to finally get that chape snap into place.

”Jimin knows and I think Jungkook knows too.” Once he’s done he restores the distance between the two of us. ”Also you know F/N she’s apt to be violent.” Yoongi nods.

”Fuck. I’m late.” I swear as I look at the time. With hurried steps, I pick up my boots and size up my keys ready to leave.

”See you later.” Hearing his voice calling out to me I look back smiling a little managing to whisper back a ’see you later’ of my own. I think this was the longest conversation I held with him so far, what a shame I couldn’t stay to talk more.

The wine tasting went better than I expected. That guy is filthy rich he gave us a little tour around the house before letting us each pick out 5 wines of our liking. We learned that he’s a sports major he’s a swimmer and he told us stories about his practises with the swimming team and talked awfully long about his wins and trophies. To be honest he seemed like a bit eccentric and pompous for me but Rori liked him.

We were late because our taxi on its way to the bar got into a little traffic jam. I got a text from Yoongi at the same time F/N got one from Jimin they were curious about where we are and how we are. We wrote back a short text that we’re almost there.

”So? Whose’s the guy?” Jin asked once we are seated down. F/N took her place next to Jimin and Rori beside her leaving me with the only option of sitting down next to Yoongi at the other side of the table.

Once I’m comfortably seated I look around the table I catch in the corner of my eye Namjoon and Jungkook taking shots. Yoongi grabs his alcoholic beverage before him from the table our shoulders brush against each other due to the motion. I bite the inside of my cheeks don’t want to fidget in place.  

”He’s a sports major.” Rori told Jin she told him about our little tour but she conveniently left out the offer about a threesome that I politely declined.

”Oh Y/N you remember that guy who wanted to get your phone number?” Scrunching my nose as the scene flashed before my eyes, of course, I remember. That was one of my most awkward moments and believe me when I say there’s a lot of option to choose from on my list and it’s still the worst. As far as I know, that guy was a sports major too and he was very persistent.

”Yes, what about him?” I nod. I try to shoo the pictures out of head but a forming blush creeping up my neck quicker than I realise.

”Well he’s here. And he’s coming this way.” F/N tells without looking my way her eyes trained behind my form probably to report back his every move. I physically have to hold myself back from whimpering and its not the good kind.

”Shit.” I bite my lower lip don’t want to make things more obvious I don’t turn around to confirm it.

”Oh. I remember. You gave him Rori’s number, don’t you?” Jungkook, you traitor. He was with me when it happened I was flustered enough that he asked Jungkook is my boyfriend or not that I didn’t want to expand my suffering so I gave him my friend's number. She told me if someone I don’t want tries to get into my pants and bothers me I can use her number as a bait knowing her even though my pants were not on the line I still did that. Well, she did more than that after.

”Then what’s the problem?” Jin asks so invested in our conversation that I want to smack him on the neck.

”I was sexting with him and we fucked.” She shrugs. That was what I tried to say. I really don’t want to face that guy.

I stand up with so much vehemency that I almost knock down a glass from the table it’s Yoongi’s empty glass at the bottom of it there’s a thin line of whiskey left. Yoongi grabs my thighs to stabilise me. Looking over his shoulder I saw that said guy indeed walking into this direction.

”Uh, please dance with me?” I grab Yoongi’s hand surprising him for a moment or two but lets me pull him up.

”You have a habit of running away, huh?” I look back to get a grip at the situation. I led Yoongi into the dance floor even though I don’t even know how to dance. He sees the panic settling in my face so he starts guiding me with his hand flat against my lower back. There’s a lot of bodies to avoid so Yoongi is extremely close.

”I don’t like confrontation.” I subtly hide behind his broad shoulders I can see it on him how he tries to stop himself from laughing. I like the sound of his laugh.

”I’m aware.” He purrs into my ear pulling me closer by a hand wrapped around my waist the sweet scent of his cologne hits me like a tone of bricks. I’m painfully aware how his body touches mine my breast pushed against his flat ribcage I can feel him inhaling and exhaling the used oxygen.

”Y-your hand Yoongi.” His hand is dangerously low on my back I’m sure he feels the curve of my ass under his fingers. The bar is dimly lit so my blush remains subtle in a certain extent seeing me blush so many times I wouldn’t be surprised if he would recognise it before it fully blooms on my face.

”What about it?” He clearly wants me to say it but there’s no way I’m going to bluntly say that his hand touches my ass. Rather die.

”What are you doing? Are you drunk?” I defensively ask answering the question with my own questions. He openly finds my antics amusing because this time he laughs. That gummy smile makes my knees weak for him he strengthens his hold on my waist like he knows it.

”My car is here. I’m as sober as I can be.” The hand I placed on his chest when he suddenly pulled me closer itched. He’s touching me and he’s sober. Heaving a sigh he replaces them around his neck I can’t relish in the feeling as his hand on my ass beyond doubt gone since he places it back soon after even lower. The grin he shows me makes me want to give him my fist instead of my virginity.

”Then why are you touching me?” My confidence wavered significantly as he lowered his head his lips closer than ever but instead of kissing me, he blows air into my ear riling me up with the gesture.

”This makes you uncomfortable?” I wanted to say yes, but the full truth would be it’s undeniably uncomfortable and exciting it makes my blood boil under my skin and it scares me how much I want him to touch me tossing aside my insecurities just to feel him like this. At least he knows his boundaries. I don’t know what would I do if his hand suddenly moved.

”No. I’m just embarrassed.” I nervously twist a hair at the nape of his neck didn’t realise the act just when I did it.

”You ran away because you were embarrassed yesterday too?” I stop toying with his hair once the words register in my head. Is he talking about the kitchen incident? And here I thought that there’s nothing more that could make the situation more awkward.

”Y-yes.” The confidence I felt before left me I shy away from his eyes the way he sized me up that day still vivid in my head.

”Why?” A perfect arch of his eyebrows indicating that he wants his answer this time and I am about to give him.

”Because you were staring at me.” I tell him oh so matter of factly. He practically beams at the offered answer the glint in his eyes telling me that’s the answer he seeks in the first place and he has his own set of words in return.

”Wanna know what I thought about while staring at you?” His eyes pinning me to my spot I wouldn’t dare to move away even if I wanted to he seemed determined to get under my skin and maybe under my clothes too.

”No.” I challenge drunk by the boldness maybe the gin tonic I consumed earlier and the wines finally appearing be to be the liquid courage I needed. Reading between the lines Yoongi tells me despite the answer.

”I imagined how you would look like wearing my shirt. It would cover you below your knees since you are tiny. Tell me you’re wearing one of those black panties I saw before?” I don’t answer but I let him pat my knee I can feel his warm palm under the fabric of my jeans he continues with more words even bolder than the first.

”I imagined how you would look like under me on my bed wrapping those long legs around my waist.” Affected by his words I mirror his hungry expression. He’s normally not a man of so many words and hearing him talk this much makes me feel special that he’s talking to me because he feels the need to let me know what’s plaguing his mind. I entertain the idea that maybe he wasn’t sure how to convey the message since I’m so shy he didn’t have a lot of opportunity cornering me before the kitchen incident. Perhaps it was the undo he needed.

”Tell me Y/N. Do you find me attractive?” His fingers stroke the flesh of my jaw he’s getting confident as I don’t push him away.

”You are attractive.” I tell him honestly and he grins but not in a malice kind of way his grin more like a boyish grin that boys wear after hearing that their high school crush likes them back. The happy kind of grin.

”Have you thought about me too? Like I did.” The next question hits differently it’s not so innocent and I wasn’t in the illusion he is.

”Yes.” Holding onto the boldness I agree.

”Tell me.” He urges. He’s sober I remember. Avoiding his stare I let my shyness getting to the best of me he brushes a strand of hair behind my ears coaxing out the reply. It feels nice to be touched by him.

”It’s embarrassing.”

”I told you mine. You have to tell me your fantasies so I can make them come true.” He trails a finger following the line of my collarbone my outfit leaves literally everything to the imagination the only skin he can feel is on my arms.

”You’re unfair.” I whine the words out Yoongi stops his movements to see the emotions behind my eyes. He seems confused by my conflicted expression. His eyes were always expressive and I loved staring at them. Those rare moments shared, eating together at the weekends letting me hear one of his song he proudly introduces.

”How so?”

I take a deep breath cupping his cheeks. ”You look good with dyed hair but I prefer it black. You look the best when you come home from work all sweaty because the air conditioner still not gotten repaired in your workplace so you always take a shower before doing anything else.” There’s glint catching the light in his orbs watching me closely while I tell him the things I locked away in my memories. He caresses my wrist with a raised hand the other directly resting upon mine as it's his face still trapped between the heels of my palms.

”I like your voice.” I let the words flow out like a river caught up in a thunderstorm. ”I always wanted to know how it would sound like moaning my name. I like your hands too.”

”What about them?” A big smile stretches his face knowing too well he won. I don’t feel the frustration of losing I’d gladly accept this fate again and again if it will give me the same results at the end of this.

”Yoongi.” I whine.

”Did you imagined this? Or this?” His hands leaving their position fondling the flesh on my hip hiding me behind his body he walks a hand up my decolletage.

”Stop, we are in public.” I hiss.

”No one pays attention Y/N. But I’ll gladly take this to the bedroom.” The offer temps me but I remember the boys.

”We can’t. You are the only sober one and the guys need their ride home.” I reason and Yoongi groans in frustration. He forgot about them already. He looks at the booth the others are drinking and laughing.

”If I tell Namjoon to stop drinking he would be sober enough to drive them back.”

I shake my head it would be too dangerous and considering he competed with Jungkook about who can take more shots I bet he’s drunk like a donkey alongside with the younger boy. ”I’m drunk too.” I tell him when he tries to come up with more solution.

”Fine.” Yoongi hugs me close probably to hide his displeased face doesn’t want to sound so desperate maybe he’s embarrassed.

”Don’t be like that. I promise if in the morning when I sobered up you still want to do it I’ll let you.”

He perks up gently pushing me away to look into my eyes. ”Let me do what?”

”Let you take me.”

 ***

I feel something warm tickling my sides a sudden wave of cold air hits my stomach but the cold soon replaced with a warm and wet feel against my skin. My eyes narrowly open I try to fidget away wrapping my fingers around the comforter when I feel that wet and warm feeling on my thighs.

Hands and tongue. The fog in front of my eyes clears I don’t remember when did I fell asleep or how did I end up here. Where am I? I spot the synthesizer in the corner Yoongi’s synthesizer. Yoongi’s room.

”Yoongi, what .. ah” My voice raspy from sleep the way he rubbed his nose into my neck just to deliver a long kiss to it after halted my question before I was able to voice it out.

”Did I wake you up. My bad.” He smiled into my skin loving the way my heart beats erratically with his every touch, his hand above my breast feeling the movements of it.

”You don’t sound so sorry about it.”

”Do you have a headache?” He caresses the side of my face helping to curl the locks behind my ear that interfered with my vision. The thoughtful gesture made me smile up at his face mirroring his expression of tenderness.

”No I’m good. I didn’t drink that much.” My fingers itch to touch his face maybe it’s because of the dreamy state I’m currently in that I have the confidence in doing so. I brush my hands through his bangs his eyes closing the caress urges a smile he grabs my hands once I’m about to pull away to move it against his mouth giving a small kiss onto my palm before intertwining them with his much larger ones.

I could get used to this. The image of him looking so raw and so vulnerable his eyes puffy with sleep lazy motions of his fingertip exploring my body under the duvet. My shirt is rolled up just below my breasts the shirt’s neck hangs around my shoulder in a loose coverage it smells like Yoongi just like the covers. Looking down I realise it’s not my shirt. It’s his.

”Glad to hear that. I want you to repeat your promise to me.” Yoongi burrows his face into my neck again his hair brushing against my bare skin the hand that’s not holding mine drops under the covers finding my hip guiding me to drape my right leg over his waist facing each other sideways.

”Promise? Can you be more specific?” I boldly move my hand caressing with feather-light touches his side I can feel his bare torso and hips under my fingers he shivers and not because of the cold. He’s shivering because I touched him and he’s not wearing a shirt. The thought crosses my mind that the shirt I’m wearing is the one he did wear the whole day but not now. Every other day I would be embarrassed but I quite liked the idea of wearing his clothes in his bed.

”A tease I see.” He recovered quicker than I would like he gave a quick peck onto my shoulder where his shirt didn’t cover that much skin. He cupped my breast above the fabric of my bra the sudden feel of him squeezing me there I whined a little bit too loudly. I pulled my hand away shielding my face due to embarrassment.

”Yoongi.” I shyly call his name. He let his hand stay there but he remained motionless giving my hands each a kiss just where my eyes would be if I didn’t hide behind my limbs. His hand felt warm against me where my bra wasn’t covering his two fingers rested directly on the skin of my breast.

”Do I have your consent baby?” I gulp my shy personality says no but my body says yes for me.

”You can have anything.” I place my palm against his that lays on my body my eyes still closed but I don’t shield my face anymore. The words came out as whispers even though I wanted him to hear me say it. I wanted him to go on.

”Love. Answer me.” I open my eyes again when I feel his hand leave my boobs to cup my face with it instead.

”You can have me. You can fuck me. Did it answer your question or should I be more specific?” I wet my lips poking my tongue against the inside of my cheeks trying to calm down the rapid movement of my heart my hands shook as I grip his hair moving my mouth against his to not just say but show my consent. I want this. I want him.

”No. I think it was explicit enough, I like seeing you blush.” Hearing him say that makes me blush harder and he gifts me with a gummy smile basking in the responsive reactions. I would be more embarrassed if I wouldn’t feel the sticky substance dampening my underwear.

”Do you have something in mind? A preference? Or can I surprise you.” The way he explicitly asks about my sexual preferences makes him appear hotter a new wave of arousal hits me making me grind my thighs together forgetting that Yoongi’s leg is between them. I know he felt the wetness but doesn’t comment on it he instead pushes his knees further up parting my legs.

”You d-decide.” I moan when his knee brushes against my crotch. He hummed delighted by my answer. Placing back his hand once more squeezing my breasts before undoing the clasps behind my back. He slowly lets the material fall he strictly looks into my eyes not wandering downwards seeking out my every reaction. I gave him a little nod he takes it as the permission he needed he moves the cover so he can take a look.

”So pretty.” He sighs into my skin he turns my body to be flat against the bed the cold sheets meeting with my back goosebumps travelling up my spine. ”So soft.” He mumbles the endless of praises dragging his fingers over a nipple before licking it with his tongue a choked moan leaves my parted lips his hair gently caressing the skin. He circles the nipple with his poked out tongue kneading the other neglected one with his free hand. Mewls and sighs, in turn, filling the room trying to keep my voice quiet but it’s hard since the only thing I can concentrate on is his mouth on me and his hands those long fingers as he drags them down on my body a finger slides under the waistband of my panty he stretches the material out before letting it snap back into place. The uncomfortable feeling of it sticking to my folds gets frustrating by every passing minute.

”You smell good.” His raspy voice helps me return from my sudden astonishment I scrape his scalp with my long nails as I weave my fingers through his hair he lets out a low growl my skin covering up the noise the vibration he sends up my body by it makes me tighten my legs around his waist my underwear covered cunt pressed against his firm chest forces a not so silent whine out.

”It’s m-my lotion.” I reply absentmindedly. He hums into my collarbone not sure my answer registered truly in his brain I feel him taking a big inhale before pulling away he pushes himself up with the help of his hands planted beside my head looking with heavily lidded eyes taking in my hazed eyes and swollen lips before connecting our mouths. I almost forgot how good of a kisser Yoongi is.  

The light touch against my inner thigh makes my hip jolt up in surprise Yoongi’s eager mouth swallows all the sounds and whimpers. ”Relax.” He purrs aiming for my hips soothing circles into my skin. I take a few deep breaths Yoongi waits patiently for me to calm down a little the way his eyes sizing me up like I’m some kind of goddess eases some of my nerves. Once he’s positive I’m not going to run away he lets his palm touch me the barrier that’s my underwear stays in place as he drags his fingers directly onto my heat. I feel it throb under his ministrations having confidence after a few moans I let out he gets bolder using more pressure to dip between my folds the underwear’s silky touch lets him move smoothly. ”Can I feel it? I want to make sure you’re wet enough before I do anything else.” Nodding even before the question was fully out I anticipate a laugh or something to tease me about my eagerness. I don’t think I wanted someone this bad before to touch me. But he doesn’t laugh he seems as eager as I feel. He slides a finger under the damp material but he retreats too soon. ”Please, can I take it off?” To persuade me further if his plea wasn’t enough he rubs his fingers where my clit is over my panty. The plea was enough but I’m not complaining. I manage to signal him with a breathy yes. Don’t have to tell him twice he slides the ruined material down my legs his big warm hands gripping my inner thighs preventing my legs from closing before he can take a look.

”Look at that. So pink and swollen for me.” Previously he was careful with every move waiting for approval before doing anything bold but like he’s lost all the continence in him Yoongi drags two fingers up my folds coating his fingers with my arousal letting just the tip of his fingers penetrating just to pull back. I let out the loudest moan blushing as I realise just how loud I sounded but Yoongi doesn’t seem to mind, not at all. He wanted to coax more of those sounds as he bent down parting the lips with his tongue letting out his own moans while tasting me and if it’s even possible at this point I feel more turned on than ever.

”Warm too. Sorry, my love, my hands are a little cold but I hope you don’t mind.” He finally slips a finger in my eyes slightly open he watches me with a grin loving the way I squirm wanting it chuckles deep and I don’t mind at all. The stretch his one digit means feels familiar reminding me when I was chasing relief on my own but his fingers are so so much better longer and thicker. I can’t wait to feel the second one.

”I want to make you cum on my tongue.” Delivering a kittenish lick sucking on my clit for the demonstration before he goes on. ”Just to bring you another orgasm with my fingers.” Yoongi curls the one finger in me rubbing it into my throbbing walls ”Lastly let you cum around my cock.” He throws his head back moaning sinfully just thinking he’s about to make everything he said come true. ”You deserve at least three orgasms but I shouldn’t be greedy your virgin cunt can’t handle three.” He eases another finger in this time the stretch is a bit more uncomfortable.

”Let’s start with two.” He says settled with the idea he places a wet kiss onto my hip before finding my abused clit again sucking and rolling it around his tongue my walls contacts around his two digits I feel the sticky substance coating my inner thighs and dripping onto the sheets the mess, the way Yoongi’s hair tickle my thighs, the way he moves his fingers inside me, the pleasure gets overwhelming something starts to build up promising a relief I never had the chance of feeling before.

”Yoongi fuck, Yoongi” His name spills from my mouth and it seems to encourage him to be faster.

”It’s fine.” He tells before sucking harshly on my clit. ”Cum for me.” The proud grin he forms still buried between my legs and the vibration of his hum makes my legs shake I let my head fall back into the pillows closing my eyes until I see literal stars.

He stops lapping my juices once I’m finished the proud smile still plastered on his face licking his lips capturing the remaining of my pleasure. He looks so hot. I never knew I’m capable of coming this hard.

”Good?” Placing a kiss onto my nose he caresses my arms I didn’t realise I was grabbing onto the sheets this tight I let Yoongi place my hands onto his shoulder blades he moves to get between my legs once more.

Instead of answering, I can’t help but impatiently point out. ”You’re still wearing clothes.” I grab his hips pulling on his sweatpants playfully.

”Wanna take it off?” He asks smirking. I roll my eyes at his cockiness not that he’s all talk when it comes to his skills but he has more ego than he can manage and I’m not going to increase it for him.

”So what? Don’t tell me you are not eager even more than me to bury your dick into my virgin pussy.” His eyes grow bigger for a split second before it regains its original state, so he can be startled too. I’m surprised by my boldness, but god, it’s worth it seeing him so fucked up by those words.

”You’re playing a dangerous game Y/N. I need my self-control right now.” Something shifted in his eyes he looks like he’s about to devour me. Yoongi shifts onto his knees to get rid of the final barriers between us. I close my eyes my shyness returns too soon but Yoongi doesn’t mind it I open my eyes again as he positions myself above me placing a firm kiss onto my lips he senses I’m anxious.

”Do you trust me?” Seeing the open vulnerability in his shiny orbs, not entirely clouded by lust makes my head swim with a lot of suppressed emotion. I feel the urge to smile lifting my head from the pillows beneath me I give him a peck.

”Of course I am.” I kinda like you. I bite into my lips before the next sentence could slip through we’ll talk about this another time. Right, the only thing I want to focus on is Yoongi. Only Yoongi. His tip brushes against my stomach, shit, I haven’t seen how big he is. His lip pressed to mine swallows the tiny moan leaving my lips as he pushes the first inch inside parting my walls in a painful stretch. Fuck. He’s big.

”Tight.” Yoongi moans, more in pleasure than I am currently in but it’s ok. He made me cum I want to see him cum too. ”Relax for me angel I won’t hurt you I promise.” Relishing in the way he caresses my side I try to relax my body he pushes another inch in slowly his tip must be fully buried by now.

”That’s right. You’re doing so well.” He praises his eyebrows knit together in concentration he’s holding himself back because of me. Touched by the gesture I move my hip to meet his advances he slips in deeper than he intended his groan significantly louder by the sudden pleasure.

”Does it hurt?” He pulls himself together to keep the eye contact he caresses the skin under my eye I nod before answering.

”A little.”

”Let’s try a few more thrusts if it still hurts after that I’ll stop and eat you out again. Shit. Maybe I should have made you cum again for the extra lubrication.” Yoongi regretfully gazes at my face.

”It’s fine. Just go slow.” I say the burning is bearable I’m getting used to the feeling slowly but not sure if I can cum again.

”My baby is so tight.” I’m definitely a sucker for those pet names. It helps me focus on his words instead of his slow thrusts. ”I want to make you feel as good as you make me feel. Feeling you wrapped around me a dream come true.” I experimentally squeeze around him and he lets out a loud moan his head nestled into my neck groaning and moaning between filthy words his pace got quicker but I don’t stop him even though it’s not feeling as good as him eating me out. I want to please him though and by the sounds, he seems very pleased.

”Are you alright?” He stops after hearing a louder whiny moan on my part but I don’t let him I circle my hips in place dragging out moans from him but he forces himself to reset his previous slower pace. I’m not having any of it. I want him to cum and want it soon.

”Yoongi” I whine out his name an idea foggily forming at the back of my head. ”Yoongi, I wanna ride you.”

”Are y-you sure?” He stills inside of me waiting for the confirmation and I nod inviting him into a kiss that turns slopy by time. I feel his hands grabbing at my waist to change position this way he sinks in deeper.

Holy shit it feels so much better.

”Fuck. Do you like this?” He grips my hips dragging his cock touching every sensitive part in me as my walls swallow his shaft he pulls me up just to let me sink down with a needy moan I’m starting to feel the appeal.

”Yes. I-ah-think.” I can almost picture the way my eyes roll back behind my skull right now. What was I saying? ”Go faster.” I choke out and Yoongi with a following set of groans obligates I’m too far gone to pay attention to how Yoongi watches with hungry eyes that I ruin the bedsheets.

”I like that you are so messy.” He places a stray hair behind my ears our chests pressed together so he can thrust up faster and harder. Yoongi holds me in place taking control the way his eyes shuts involuntarily and his member twitching inside of me signals that he’s close.

He’s breathtakingly beautiful as he reaches his high he’s so lost in the pleasure my walls provide so tight around him that he doesn’t have the mind to kiss me back so I just press them together for a minute longer. My legs ache because of the exercise but I let him use me to ride out his high the pretty sounds and satisfied look he gives me once seated firmly inside me with our mixed cum spilling out he looks down where our body connects rubbing the skin of my hip lovingly while watching me ruin his sheets. He likes that I’m messy.

”I hope you like me back because I don’t think I could fuck anyone else from now on.” I end up in a pit of laughter leaning my head on his shoulder he feels my body shake with the motion Yoongi whines in overstimulation when I accidentally squeeze his spent member. I peck the skin where my head previously rested before searching for Yoongi’s eyes.

”I do like you back.” I admit it shyly even though there’s nothing to be shy about his dick is still inside for fuck’s sake.

”Glad to hear that.” His grin returns faster than the speed of light. ”I thought I fucked your brains out when you suddenly started laughing. I was concerned for a minute.” I try to hit his shoulder but he’s faster grabbing my hand by the wrist and gives the flesh an attentive kiss the gesture is sweet and melts my heart.

”How are you feeling?” It’s cute how he seeks my reassurance. He lets me move away careful when pulling out so I can finally take the previous position lying down.

”Hm, sore but good. I just need .. some time. I don’t think I can stand up just yet.” I offer my honest reply burying my nose into the duvet that got tossed aside. He leaves the room making me confused but once he’s back with a towel in hand I pierce two and two together. It’s his towel. The thought is enough to make me blush furiously.

”Spread your legs for me.” I take the request as an order shyly spreading my legs so he can clean me up. ”There. All cleaned up.” The bed squeaks under the weight of his one knee pushing me further into the sheets. Yoongi bows down to kiss me his tongue teases my lips as we kiss asking for permission that I eagerly permit.

[javisjeanjacket]

Kids - (poe dameron x fem!reader)

A/N: Heyoooo!! SHE’S BACK! I’m starting back with a quickie;) because I am still getting used to my new home and am not emotionally settled in yet. You know how it is. This one is inspired by Orville Peck’s ‘Kids’. It’s a banger so you should listen to it as well!

If I used your gif, please shoot me a message so I can add your tag! :)

Word count: 900

Warnings: lil angst, I cursed

The voice of Shara Bey filtered through the small sunlit house to reach the two playing toddlers stationed in the living room.

"Poe! Share with Y/N." She scolded her son.

The small black haired boy knocked his toy X-Wing against his friend's forehead, giving her a swollen welt the size of a Whisperbird egg.

She cried out and clutched her head, dropping her grip on Poe's toy.

The small boy waddled off hurriedly in the direction of his room. He was halfway to his door when a strong hand wrapped onto his shirt and yanked him backwards.

"Poe Dameron you apologize right now!" Shara exclaimed, her voice sterner than the small boy had ever heard it before.

Poe whimpered in his mother's strong grasp.

She pulled him into the crook of one elbow, carrying him like a football, back towards the screaming Y/N.

Shara's husband, Kes Dameron, entered the living room from his workshop, his hands covered with mechanical grease. "Shara, what's...?" His words trailed off as he looked over the scene and began to put the pieces together. The man reached down to pick up the squealing girl and cradle her in his arms. He ran a hand over her welt and she yelped in pain.

"Poe, you need to apologize to Y/N." Shara said, her gaze firm on the squirming boy in her arms.

Poe whined for a beat and then said, "But, it's not fair, Mommy! She has a toy and she tried to take mine!"

"Not everything in life is fair, Poe. That doesn't mean you get to be mean, you understand?" One of her dark eyebrows raised.

The small boy sighed and mumbled, "I'm sorry."

"I don't think she can hear you, son." Kes said, nodding to the wailing girl in his arms.

"I'm sorry Y/N." Poe said again, extravagantly emphasizing every word.

"Good. Now, get in your room, mister. You're in time out." Shara said as she dropped him back to the ground.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jolting out of his slumber, Poe Dameron sat up in his bed. He ran a hand through his thick black hair and over his stubble-ridden face.

His dream began to dissipate from his mind and the day in front of him began to materialize.

'Have to go to briefing in 20 minutes, need to double check the hyperdrive on Black One before the mission this afternoon, should probably shower-' His to-do list for the day was interrupted by the jingle of an incoming call on his holomessager.

Poe leaned over in bed and took the singing device from his nightstand. His eyes scanned over the Aurebesh on the device, denoting who his call was from.

"Y/N!" Poe said, the excitement in his voice causing it to warble. The man flipped the blanket and sheets off his bed and hurried to his closet, pulling the first pair of pants he could find. He snapped them on and then clicked the answer key on his holomessager.

Your face shone brightly on the screen in front of him, your mouth pulled back in a smile and the small scar Poe gave you on your forehead. "Dameron! How's my favorite Resistance member?"

Poe smiled and rubbed his palm across the back of his neck. "Hey, Y/N. It's good to hear from you."

You sighed and shifted your hips. "Yeah, sorry it took so long to get back to you, we had to move our Base out of Bagano. First Order troops crash landed here and some of them survived to call for a rescue transport, which-"

"Brought even more First Order troops to your secret Base." The Commander nodded in understanding.

"Right." You replied, your bottom lip in your mouth.

Poe chuckled. "I can't believe neither one of us have died yet."

You laughed. "I can't believe it either. With all the shit both of us have been through."

"Remember our first flying lesson? Without BB-8, we wouldn't have made it out of that one." The pilot shook his head in wonder.

"BB-8 is the only reason either of us are alive, I'm pretty sure."

Poe snickered and grabbed a shirt from his closet and pulled it on.

"Poe?" You asked, your voice suddenly quiet.

"Hmm?" He responded.

"Promise you'll keep calling me until one of us dies?"

The Commander's eyebrows scrunched. "Y/N, of course. I thought that was the deal."

"Good...." You bit your lip, vying to keep your heart from spilling down your lips. "You're like the only thing that keeps me sane in this war."

Poe nodded and looked down at his bare feet. "I feel the same way about you."

"I wish we could-" Your chest tightened.

"Me too." He interrupted. "I thought that I was dreaming. The first time you kissed me." Poe's voice clipped towards the end of his sentiment. His face drew back in shock at his confession.

"Poe..." You shook your head.

The man on the other side of your holomessager kept up his momentum, "But, I know this isn't the academy anymore; I know that."

You nodded your head, "We can't go back to being those kids again, Dameron."

"Maybe we don't have to be those kids again, maybe we can just be us. Together."

The backs of your eyes pricked hot with emotion. You swallowed, "We have to make it out of this thing alive first."

Poe nodded his head and took his top lip into his mouth. "Yeah."

"Just keep calling me, Dameron." You whispered.

"I will. I still really, really love you." He smiled, the sides of his eyes pained with the distance between the two of you.

You smiled gently back. "I still really, really, love you too."

POE DAMERON TAGLIST: @softly-sad​ @itsamedeemoney 

ANY/EVERYTHING TAGLIST: @mcolbz14​

What did you think? I really hope you enjoyed reading my work. Just your liking / re-blogging it means a lot. If you have a moment, I would love to hear your thoughts! Tell me what you think via my ask box or a comment always warms my heart!! Thank you again for reading!

Need more reading material? You can visit my Masterlist for more Oscar Isaac content, as well as my other works.

Want to be kept in the loop? Let me know so I can put your handle in my taglist form. Right now, I’m writing for Poe Dameron, Santi, and Din Djarin, but I have plans to expand my SW character list, and eventually add in my favorites from the MCU as well.

Thanks again for reading! Sending love! -hai

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #360

“we are the ones that wanna play  /  always wanna go, but you never wanna stay”

"Crawling" or "In The End?" I want to say "Crawling," but I really can't be sure. Both are bomb. Is your window open? No. Monsters Inc. or Shrek? Shrek, my man. What did you last hear that made your jaw drop? Jason's mom died. What is the longest shower or bath you have ever taken? I remember as kids, Nicole and I would sometimes play 'til Mom made us finish because the water was cold by then. As an adult, idk about my longest shower. Do you have a preference of chocolate? Yeah, milk chocolate. Is there anyone you’d like to hug right now? Yeah. Could you ever picture someone writing a biography about you? Definitely not. Do you have a clock in your room? No. Do you shut off the computer when you’re done using it? No, I just close it. Do you usually catch a cold during the winter? No. I just about never get sick. Are you a good multi-tasker? NOOOOOOOOOOO. Do you know any deaf people? If so, is it easy or difficult to have conversations with them? No. Is there a door knocker on your front door? No. Were you ever into Pokémon? Bitch I still am. Do you drink a lot of water? Sigh, no. I'm definitely better than I used to be, though; once upon a time, I literally never drank it unless I was extremely hot and dehydrated. Nowadays, it's usually after I finish my soda for the day that I then only drink water, normally around one full tall cup of it. Do you like fireworks? They're beautiful, but I'm personally against them out of respect for veterans suffering from PTSD as well as animals, because I'm not exactly interested in traumatizing them, either. Is respect given or earned with you? It's given, the way I think it should be. Are you “in the closet” about anything? No. Are you missing any teeth? No. Do you like scrapbooking? I've never gotten into it and am not really interested in doing so. What was or will be your first tattoo? It's a semicolon butterfly on my right wrist. Sometimes I've thought about getting it covered with a cooler design but the same concept; it was literally from Google, and I'm very much not into "sharing" tattoo designs with probably thousands of other people. But, I still think it really is cute, and it's just very special to me as my first, so idk. Do you have any tattoos dedicated to someone special? I have one written in Sara's handwriting inside a heart, and my "ohana" tattoo that I am 100% getting covered was dedicated to my former best friend Colleen. I've talked before about why "ohana" has never really resonated with me, and I just don't like it anymore at all. Thank God it's small. Do you like ghost stories? Oh HELL yeah, lay 'em on me. What was your favorite movie as a kid? The Lion King. Some things never change, ha. Do you own a lot of cookbooks? Mom has looooots, but never uses any. I think her mom gave them to her, so she just keeps 'em. What’s your father’s handwriting like? It looks like every other man's handwriting I've ever seen lol. All the letters are capitalized. Did you wash your hair last time you showered? I wash my hair every time I shower. I have to with it naturally being so oily. What does your shampoo smell like? Coconut. Do you listen to Guns N' Roses? Not a lot, but yeah. They've got some bangers. I actually want "Sweet Child O' Mine" to be the father/daughter dance at my wedding. Have you ever been a bridesmaid? Yeah, at my sister's wedding. What was the last video game that you beat? I replayed Silent Hill 2 a long time ago. Have you ever hyperventilated? Yep. Do you talk in your sleep? I scream in my sleep. Nightmares/terrors are a blast. Whose house did you last sleep over? Sara's. Have you ever been cut by scissors? No. Do you like peaches? It's odd, I like canned sliced peaches, but the actual, full fruit, I don't. I love peach flavored juice, though. Do you enjoy being surrounded by neighbors, or would you be more comfortable someplace secluded? Take me back to the middle of nowhere, please. I'm really not digging being in an actual neighborhood. Is there any sibling rivalry between you and your siblings, if you have any? Not at all. Do you usually root for the good guys or the bad guys? Ha, the baddies... Are you allowed to have pets at your house? We're allowed to have what we currently own and then maybe one dog if Mom finally finds one. Have you ever lived in a trailer park? No. Is there anyone that you know through the internet that you would feel comfortable meeting in person? There's quite a few, actually! Have you ever had a dream involving characters from a game/movie/television show? Yeah. What’s the last thing you wrote down? My signature, I think? Do you remember any phone numbers from years ago that now belong to someone you don’t know? No. Have you ever found something strange in your mailbox? No. Who was the last relative that came to visit you? My half-sister and her husband. Does your bedding all match? Not currently. Are you more comfortable with having short hair or long hair? SHORT. Are you interested in fantasy movies/shows? That's my preference. Have you ever gone whale-watching? No, but that'd be dope. What is something that you have a large amount of? Meerkat plushies. Who is it that you’re in love with? Nobody. Have you ever gotten love and infatuation confused? No. Do you have a steady income? No. Do you take your medications in the morning or at night? Both. Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? No, I wish. :( Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? MILK. I don't eat it with water. When was the last time you ran into someone that you didn’t want to see? Idk. Have you ever tried vlogging, and if yes, did you stick with it? Noooo, I'm completely disinterested in doing that myself. If you go to church, what is your favorite thing about it? I don't go. Even as a kid when Mom made me, I hated it. ^and what is your least favorite thing about it? N/A What do you do for exercise? I don't. .-. I want a pool SO badly to swim and strengthen my legs without having to worry about sweating or collapsing, though. Mom says we don't have space, but we definitely do. Not a lot, but enough. Do you have a birthmark? If yes, what color is it? Yeah, it's just a bit darker than the rest of my skin. Do you need to lose weight? Yes. My sister, Mom, and I very recently started a Weight Watchers subscription and we're all working our asses off to stick to it. Ash has already lost like, 12 pounds (she started before Mom and me), so I'm kinda hopeful. Have you ever had a cat? Growing up, after we took in a stray female, we ended up with a fucking empire of cats, literally around three dozen, I'd say. They were all outdoors, too, and not fixed because we couldn't afford it, so tomcats would come around and, y'know, make matters worse. Eventually, animal control took them all and I was DEVASTATED, but looking back, I understand it was necessary. Anyway, I have one cat now. Indoors and fixed and the prince of my world, haha. Have you ever had a dog? We've had a few. I was born with my dad having a collie named Trigger, but I don't remember her at all; she died of old age I believe when I was very young. Then we briefly had a pup named Angel, but she died due to that disease some puppies just have. We didn't get another dog until Teddy, who was my Christmas present, and he was put to sleep only last year, rest my baby's soul. We also had Dale, Cali, Delilah, and Bentley. Have you ever any other kind of animal? A LOT. I'm probably going to forget some, but we've had hamsters, rats, snakes, fish, a turtle, two lizards, gerbils, guinea pigs... just a lot. Animals have always been very important in my life. Have you ever had a pet rock? HA, yeah. I didn't take it seriously at all, but I had one. When was the last time you painted something? Not since my Painting course in my final college attempt. Do you have any disabilities? Not in the traditional sense, no. My social anxiety though is at such a severity that it majorly infringes upon my ability to do a LOT of things, though. What are five of your favorite stores at the mall? I couldn't name five. Just Hot Topic and Spencer's, really. What season do you want to get married in? AUTUMN. The actual dream situation would be to get married in the snow in a black dress, like can you IMAGINE the pictures, but realistically, it'd be in the fall to avoid the biting cold. Has anyone ever spread lies about you? Yeah. Anything special planned for today? Nope. Blue or green? Blue. How much older/younger than you was the person you lost your virginity to? He's two years older than me. Do you still care for that person? Very much. Can you completely annihilate the first Mario game in less than an hour? I haven't even played the first game. I've never really been into the games to begin with. Did you make it all the way through the Oregon Trail game? Yes! I was OOOOOBSESSEEEEEED as a kid. I would usually play it after school when my mom was an assistant teacher and was finishing up her work for the day. Have you ever contemplated climbing a water tower? Uh, no. Those kind of people got some wanderlust levels that I ain't got, haha. If you have a Facebook, when was the last time you changed your profile picture? It's been a few months. Would you ever marry someone who was lower class? Um, yes? You can deny it all you want, but answering "no" is pretty much the same as saying you'd marry for money. Is there a guy you wish you hadn’t let slip away? ugh Which do you prefer: English or math? English, by light years. Who is a singer that has given you chills? David Draiman's voice in the Disturbed cover of "Sound of Silence" is fucking haunting. Greatest cover of all time. Do you watch America’s Got Talent? I did when Sharon was a judge. Do you think you could win America’s Got Talent? Hell no. What act would you perform in a talent show? uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Have you ever practiced yoga? Yes. I used to be BANGIN at it. What is your favorite thing to buy at the Farmer’s Market? Fruit! Do you get carsickness? No. What color is the rim of your full-length mirror? Black. What is your state’s bird (if you live in the US)? Cardinal. Which style of wedding dress is your favorite? I'm a sucker for ballgown dresses. Do you enjoy editing videos? I used to love it, for many many years. Now, I just don't have the dedication or motivation to. Do you enjoy editing photos? Yes. If you gave birth, do you think you would want it filmed? Um, absolutely not. I would have NO desire to look back on me shrieking my lungs out and essentially dying. I handle abdominal pain very poorly, so I've got a goooood feeling that if I actually wanted to have kids, I'd be that woman screeching like a banshee.

[docholligay]

DEFINITELY AU TO MY UNIVERSE

This is based on the idea @rhiorhino came up with in her ask of having Pharah and Tracer live together after something happens to Emily and Mercy. I worked on this A LOT A LOT, so I hope you enjoy! its not at all perfect but I think it’s good! 3,300 words. 

Tracer and Pharah had been opposites from the first day they had met, and while they had grown warm to each other, they certainly had not grown any more like each other. Tracer was impulsive and quick, going in with her whole self, a tiny firework of a human being, exploding and lighting the entire sky in one moment. Pharah was thoughtful and measured, tracing out the steps in her mind, a clear line from one to the other, carefully lighting each corner like a candle. 

So it made a certain amount of sense that when Emily MacNair, who would have been Oxton, was murdered, Tracer immediately and quickly lost her mind. Emily had not even been laid to rest when Tracer skipped the country in pursuit of her murderer, and anyone who got in the way discovered that Tracer was sunshine, and the sun is more than capable of killing without mercy. They said she beat Widowmaker to death with the butt of her rifle. Tracer would only say that probably did happen, but truthfully she didn’t remember a thing. It was hard to argue against that point, when she returned to London and descended into what a physician had called “brief reactive psychosis.” It was difficult to charge her for the death of someone wanted dead or alive by several countries, in any case. Born under a lucky star. 

It was four months after that, with Tracer finally more or less in touch with reality and functional, that Overwatch continued its disastrous year. 

Perhaps it had been that there was no one to blame, no villain to pursue, that it was just one terrible moment. An accident. There had been the terrible accident, and Pharah had held Mercy, and Mercy had died, and that was all there was to it. Who could she hate? And so, perhaps it was these things, but perhaps it was that different quality to Pharah herself, that she did not explode into loud and keening grief. 

She buried her wife, exactly according to her religious wishes, and calmly laid a hand on her coffin before it was laid into the grave. She went back home, and cleaned and folded and scrubbed the floor, lined up the shoes at the front door in a neat line, and went to bed. She went to work, and redid the filing cabinet, and wrote a detailed schedule on the board, and shined her shoes. She carefully settled Mercy’s affairs, and mostly remembered not to bring up a cup of coffee in the morning. And, repeat.  Fareeha Amari was doing very well, by most standards. 

Even Tracer, in that first month, as people told her how unwavering Pharah had been in all this, had grumbled “Right, because Fareeha’s bloody fucking perfect and don’t I know it.” 

 People had mostly stopped asking questions with concerned faces, three months later. Anyone looking at her would have seen how stable and steady she was.

“Bit worried about Fareeha.” Tracer had said, leaning against Winston as they watched TV in his living room. 

Tracer had given up on living alone, sold her house to her cousin, and decided, simply, that she was going to live with Winston for the rest of her life. It was more than big enough for three, if it came to it, hope never leaving her even as she grieved, and it made the most sense to have herself there. She loved Winston, and he loved her, and Tracer was a bit frightened of her own recently-discovered fragility. He’d welcomed her happily. 

“Did she say something?” He snuggled her in a little closer. 

“No, and that’s part of it,” She sat up, gazing over the top of the TV back into her own mind, “she hasn’t snapped at me, or teased at me, in months. I spent all morning doing things I know drive her absolutely mad. It’s like she’s not even there, Win.” 

Winston shifted uncomfortably. “She knows you’re--well--she’s trying to--” 

Tracer sighed aggressively. “Win, it’s been months now. Not even on medication now, Doc’s really quite happy with me, and no one sniping at me did it in the first place. Don’t treat me like--”

“I’m sorry,” he touched her back softly, “I’m just,” he gave a sheepish laugh, “Myself, all the time.” 

Tracer shook her head. “She comes in, same time every day, she puts away her papers, she cleans something, always, she tidies up my desk, as well, without a word, ‘ardly. She does her work, ‘as a three pound meal deal for lunch, same time every day,, works out, and I ‘appen to know she goes to the Tesco every night, same time every day, gets a ready meal, goes ‘ome, cleans and organizes something, again, eats it, and goes to bed.” 

“Lena, how do you know that?” 

She tossed her hands in the air. “I followed ‘er, obviously! Multiple times!”

“We have to get you a constructive hobby.” 

“And she didn’t even notice I was bloody fucking following her. Fareeha.” Tracer gave a little frown and flopped back against Winston. ‘She’s ‘orribly depressed, Win. I know it.” she closed her eyes, 

“I don’t want ‘er to live this way. Or not live, right? Or worse, I don’t want to wake up one morning and find,” her eyes popped back open, gesturing wildly, “Commander Fareeha Amari, precise and disciplined in every way, ‘as done a very precise and disciplined job of offing ‘erself.” 

“You don’t think--” 

“I do think!” She jumped back up again, a creature in constant emotion. “She’s so bloody logical, to the point of being stupid, and she’ll, “ Tracer drew her hand widely across the air, slipping into a terrible Egyptian accent, “find it most reasonable that I will never find happiness again, and my lack of passion makes me a liability, and so, I will make sure not to leave a mess.” She snapped her fingers and jumped toward Winston, eyes locked. “That COULD happen, Win, I can bloody well see it in me mind’s eye!” 

“Lena--” 

“Know what she bought at Tesco, Win? Bangers and mash, a ready meal from Tesco for one. Of bangers and mash.” 

Winston put his hand on her back, and drew her into his shoulder. He said nothing. What was there to say? Tracer was right, of course, and he felt terrible not having noticed. But Pharah was so good at being stoic, at keeping herself straight, at convincing the world that she had always simply been this way, and he had forgotten how her speech had lost some of its formality, how she had laughed easier, how she had teased. How she had been happy. 

It was easy to ignore Pharah’s coping, because it was not drinking too much, or getting into fights, or hallucinating, but her absolute sense of control and order that guided her through difficulty. 

“Also, she isn’t eating enough,” Tracer shook her head, “She’s lost ‘alf stone, at least. Maybe more like a stone, really.” 

“What should we do?” He said softly. 

“Well,” she rocked back to sit on her heels, running a hand through her hair, “We ‘ave to ‘ave her come live ‘ere, with us. Break her out of it all, right?” She grinned. “Bunch of the sadsack bachelor types, that’s us. We can ‘elp ‘er, Win, I know we can.” 

Winston had no idea how Tracer was going to get Pharah to agree to this. He wasn’t sure if she knew how she was going to. But Tracer believed she would, and she could, and that it itself made him believe. 

____

It wasn’t nearly so hard as Tracer had thought it was going to be. It took only two weeks of wheedling and begging and claiming that she and Win couldn’t possibly afford the place without her, being everything that had happened. It would be a proper favor to them, if Pharah would come and live with them. Besides, wasn’t Pharah so good at all the things she wasn’t? She’d be so much more help to running the house than Tracer was, after all. 

Pharah was scrubbing the office floor, as she did every single Thursday, when she finally broke. A person could only avoid Tracer’s attempts at something she truly wanted for so long. 

“If you and Winston need money, I will give you money.” She did not look up at Tracer. Back and forth across the boards. Check carefully for a scratch the needs filling. RInse the brush. Repeat. “I have little need for extra income.” 

Tracer sighed heavily. She kept trying to give Pharah a graceful way to accept, and Pharah kept throwing it back in her face. It was aggravating to keep inventing new disasters for her and Winston to be having, particularly given that they were doing quite well, all told. 

She thought of the solution, and hated it just as quickly. Tracer had worked hard. The odds of any sort of relapse were exceedingly rare. She had just now gotten to the point where it seemed like people weren’t whispering about it behind her back at the greengrocers, that her reputation was beginning to shine up near to normal again. Life was full of bloody fucking sacrifice, wasn’t it? 

She knelt in front of Pharah. “Fareeha.” 

“What?” Rinse out the brush. 

“Win’s taken care of me, so much, over and over and--” It stuck in her throat, and she hated every inch of it, “I worry I might be too much for ‘im, if it ‘appens again, and ‘e’ll try to do it ‘imself, all over again. You know how Win is, about these things, and I thought, if you were there, you could reason with ‘im. Day by day. Might be best to send me off, but ‘e won’t, but, you know ‘e trusts your judgment.” 

Pharah looked up at Tracer. “I doubt I could convince Winston of this.” 

Tracer’s fists balled at her side. Pharah had always said Tracer had a way of working a person’s last nerve, but she wasn’t giving herself enough credit. 

“But,” Pharah continued, putting the brush in the bucket, “he is also unlikely to see an early sign. I would notice.” 

Tracer smiled and nodded. 

Sure you would, Fareeha, as my general early signs are jot off to Paris and kill someone, which I think Win might also pick up on, but all right. 

She sighed. “I will rent the apartment, until you feel secure. I will also pay rent at Winston’s, to assist.” 

On some other day, Tracer might have tried to tell Pharah that she could always buy another apartment, and it might be better for her to do that. But it was enough to know that Pharah would move out her things, even if every single box of Mercy’s scattered notes was going to the wide expanse of leftover warehouse they used as a storage unit in the back of Winston’s place. She had Emily’s things there as well, and was only beginning to realize she needed to begin to sort through them, so what could she possibly say? 

“Thank you.” was what she chose. 

_____

A new living arrangement is always difficult, even without the added difficulty of a person not realizing the are going through a certain amount of emotional trauma. Pharah had been living with she and Winston for six weeks now, and while they had managed to put her weight back on, and she had even managed a smile or two, Pharah still lived her life within the lines of her planner with rigidity and focus. She never looked up. 

She never spoke Angela’s name. 

Tracer began to spend the night in Pharah’s room, chatting to her about her day, asking questions that would almost certainly go unanswered. She had liked it, when she was struggling, and people had talked to her. Parvati had once recounted an entire night at the pub as a one woman play, and Tracer had managed to laugh, and so she knew there was some medicine in it. Whatever Pharah might think. 

So Tracer threw herself against Pharah’s brick wall, and she fell down, and she got up again. 

Until a Friday night on the sixth week. It was Shabbat, and Pharah had remembered it was Shabbat, because someone had greeted someone else in the grocery store as she got her three pound lunch. Tracer had noticed her quiet sternness, even more pronounced than usual, as they went through the store together, as they stopped for flowers, as someone had asked Tracer if she was planning to pop by the pub this week. 

Pharah said nothing, but Tracer was undeterred. 

“I do not entirely understand why you are in my room.” Pharah turned onto her side and shut her eyes. “Again.”

“I slept with me dad for something like two years after Mum died,” she scoffed and shook her head, “I know that sounds all sort of funny, least, the looks people ‘ave given me make me think so. 

But it wasn’t--just ‘aving each other, right there, as we were scared to lose each other, and--and well, it felt a bit lonely, and a bit cold. ‘Ard to explain, but there was something very comforting in it.” 

She laughed a little, chewing at the end of her nail. “Truth is, I only needed for so long, but somehow I knew ‘e needed it longer. To ‘ave me at ‘and, right? To know I’s safe? So I stayed there, a while longer.” 

Tracer looked over to Pharah, whose back remained turned to her, silent and still in the dim glow of moonlight, outlining her shoulder like a headstone. 

“We did mend, Dad and me.” Tracer shifted under her blanket. “Took time, but we did mend.” 

Pharah lay staring at the wall, jaw set in a hard line, arm tucked firmly under the single pillow she used. She said nothing. There was nothing to say, just more of Tracer’s rambling in the darkness. 

“There’s nothing in you that’s broken, Fareeha,” she said it with such confidence that for a moment, Pharah nearly believed it to be true, “rather, not forever. I know because there’s nothing that can be mended in me. There’ll be scars, of course, but,” she giggle and shrugged at the ceiling, “Isn’t as if you and don’t ‘ave plenty as it stands.” 

“You do not understand.” Pharah’s voice came like a command in the night. 

Tracer swallowed hard as the anger built up in her. Pharah was hurting and Pharah had a hard time with things, and Pharah did not mean to make it sound like the way she’d loved Emily wasn’t as strong, and she was going to pop Fareeha Amari in the face right FUCKING now. 

And she sat up to do it. 

But before she could, Pharah pushed herself up to her side. “You, maybe, will mend. You do not understand,” she turned to face Tracer, taking a deep breath and slowly letting it out, steam rising from a kettle, “because you are the sort of person people love. They remember you, they--they cherish seeing you, you make them laugh. You are the sort of person who has romances, a woman talks about you at brunch with her friends, and everyone says,” she began a very poor imitation of the East End, “well isn’t that Lena so very cheerful and what, right?” 

There is--” They were nearly nose to nose to now, but Pharah had the floor, and Tracer sat quietly even as her brown eyes glowed with fire. “There is nothing of that, for me. That is for people like you!” She slapped the bed in frustration. “And you will never, ever understand me, because you are some...Turkish rug, or a carved chair, and people notice you in a room, and they love you! Plenty want you in their homes.” 

Tracer moved to say something, but found the anger had left her, and she was filled instead with a deep and unyielding sorrow for all they had both lost, and all Pharah had learned she could lose. Tears slipped down her face, only to find Pharah’s had matched them. 

Pharah tapped her chest.”I am--a broom. A filing cabinet. I am useful, and needed, and diligent. I am necessary, and valued. But I am not loved. Except by her.” 

They sat in the terrible London quiet, the one that shouldn’t be real but had made itself known in the long, cold, sharp blades of that night. Both them looked down at the small expanse of cotton between them. 

“I love you. Course I do.” Lena’s voice was soft, but it did not waver. Then, quick firework that she was, her head popped up and she grinned, “Fuck’s sake Fareeha, why do you think I lay in here next to you every night and tell you stories,  me own ‘ealth?” 

It was her sunshine, always her sunshine, that broke the darkness, and even Pharah had to offer a weak huff of what had to pass for laughter now. 

“I’m scared, as well. I miss Em every single day. I wonder what might become of me, sounds a bit dramatic, but that’s how I think of it.” She rested a hand on Pharah’s knee, “You ain’t the only one with plenty to take on. We’re soldiers, right? It’s ‘ard. And me ‘aving me,” she touched the place where her CA rested, “and Ang, well, she did know me best, ‘ard to say if this friend of ‘ers will ‘ave a mind for it. Just--a bit of an ask, innit? For me, as well.”

Pharah put her hand on Tracer’s. “You will find love again. It is very hard to know you, and not love you a little.” 

“Fareeha,” she waggled her eyebrows, “is this you proposing? Flattered I am, but--” 

In one smooth movement, Pharah swept up the pillow and batted Tracer in the face with it. She fell to the mattress in a flurry of bubbling laughter, and Pharah was forced into a smile. 

“Well,” Tracer’s voice was peppy as she folded her hands and grinned up at Pharah, “I think, that when you’re ready, there’ll be someone wonderful, you know Fareeha there are women who go just mad for closet organizational systems and all that, proper filing, I don’t think you’re ‘ard to match at all, and besides all that, Ang was never any of that, but she saw, well she saw what I see, in you.” 

Pharah shook her head a moment, and waved it off almost out of habit. 

Tracer caught her eye, made sure she saw the genuine truth and belief in it. “You ‘ave a good heart, and a more tender spirit than you let on. Ang always said so, even when I didn’t believe it, that everything you do is a kind of love. That you’re terribly loving. She saw that, in you. She--” 

Pharah turned away and pinched the bridge of her nose, tripping over her words.  “Let’s please not speak of her more. Tonight.” 

“Course,” Tracer nodded, “Sometimes I can’t talk about Em, neither.” Tracer reached gently, carefully, and rubbed at Pharah’s shoulder. “You always ‘ave an ‘ome with me, and Win, ‘ere, if you want it. We love you, Fareeha. We love you ever so much.” 

Knowing it was true, and knowing that it could not possibly repair the deep chasm in her heart, the one that cried her name when the wind blew, Fareeha Amari forgot herself, unmade, in an instant, every lesson she had taught herself about how to be in this world. She began to cry. No, to sob, choked breaths flashing the memory of Mercy’s broken body, her smile under their wedding chuppah, a thousand small touches and loving words falling on her like rain. 

Tracer held her. Tracer held her, and whispered that it was all right, and that she wasn’t a filing cabinet, until they both fell asleep.

[x-heesy]

𝚂𝚠𝚊𝚐 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚊𝚌𝚔

Hip hop hooligan, I never went back to school again

When I figured how to use the pen

On the path of revenge, on the loose again

Rollin' 20 deep with my Ghost Town bully clan

Who I am? You may call me the boogeyman

And if ya ass is fat, we can do a dance

Teddy Killerz steady kill it in the mix

Wicked with the lyric shit, you know I never miss

I ran into a million dumb people in the biz

They said I rap too evil, but now I'm gettin' rich

I don't give a shit though, kick it like a schizo

Another horrorcore banger for your disco

You think you're in the clouds, I will take you higher

Sound like a got a throat full of razor wire

(It's) Time to get dough, (It's) time to explode

How the rest goes, you can ask Dope

Rotten representin', raisin' tension

Nobody in your damn crew's worth the fuckin' mention

You're doin' quite well, it's an intervention

Kill 'em all off, it's just wackness prevention

Centre of attention, mow 'em all down, don't make no exceptions

Don't really care 'bout the house of correction

My fam right here don't need no protection, pay attention

No objections, it's time for redemption

Out for perfection, I'm gunnin' like Texans

Didn't see ya comin', ace in deception

Push this whole thing to another direction

Explosives, I've got a whole collection

I'll make sure you'll get a warm reception

You unaware, incoming detecting

The Master Xploder's blowin' up your section

What up is, I got some rough shit for you suckas

Fuck the police, never talk rubbish

Butterfly knives, comin' for your stomach

The GOAT nigga runnin', the dope nigga runnin'

I want 5 hundred motherfuckin' million

It's that or your children, blow up the building

Now hands to the ceiling and bitch we ain't kiddin nah

The way we livin' there's no fucks to be given nah

Puff loud even better than Cheech

Then I preach like a motherfuckin' Cherokee Chief

I got reach from the streets to the Pelican Beach

We got beats that'll breach through you pussy ass creeps

So what's good nigga, test me I wish you would nigga

Dope D.O.D. you misunderstood nigga

So cut the crap cause I'm colder than Cola

Better than Hova, (Who?) Master Xploder

@bigbonzo @boanerges20

Desperados by Dope D.O.D., Simon Roofless

[livelovemusic0996]

This is not my typical post. I usually don't do this but I am literally disgusted but some people on this site.

Don't get me wrong I am not on a specific side of Bluelives matter or blacklives matter. Both sides have done wrong. Both sides have their good and bad. But to say law-enforcment lives don't matter wtf are you people saying. Cops risk their lives Every day to do one of the hardest jobs out there. First responders have it rough and hardly get any pay for it. I know there's bad. I know, but they aren't ALL bad.

It's easy to see all the bad cops out there. It's easy to see the bad situations and brutality that come from the select few officers who are shitty people and a disgrace to the badge. That's all they play on the news. It's all we see in media. We've got the homophobes. The natzi. The macho power hungry pricks. The men who harass black people for looking suspicious the trigger happy fools who shot to soon or to fast. I get it. However those select few are not the rule they are the exception.

They don't show the officers picking up children from the trunk of a car who got kidnapped. They don't show a mother sobbing over the killer of their child finally being arrested while the officer hugs her. They don't show an officer stepping in to break up a beating on the street or helping find the old man with alztimers who wandered outside while his very concerned loving daughter or son made dinner.

They don't show a shoot out over a simple traffic stop or the hate spewed in the faces of so many officers who never once did anything to anyone just simply wore the uniform. They don't show a gun being pulled by all races or the white cops pleading for the black man to put the weapon down that they dont want to shoot. (Which has happened don't believe me go on YouTube and watch bodycam footage.)

They don't show after a shooting the cops who just had a loaded gun pointed at their face running to apply gauze packs and quick clot to the gunshot wounds until ems arrives. They don't show the white cop saving the pregnant black woman who's husband was working and a man broke in her house and held her hostage. They don't show the cops looking through snow rain and storms for the little boys and girls who went missing from their homes. They don't show them rushing to the scene where three young children are holed up inside their bathroom and the child is begging officers to get there to help because their daddy came home drunk and is trying to kill mommy. They don't show them rushing to a scene to help someone when just earlier they had let loose a nasty string of hate at them for previously doing there jobs.

They don't show the emotional break downs when you loose a partner or close freind on the force or find the body of a child you searched weeks for. They don't show the nightmares and therapy sessions over finding broken mangled bodies of men women and worst of all children. They dont show the backlash and hate you get for having to shoot the "innocent" black, white, Hispanic, Asian man who previously held up a gas station, shot the worker and wouldnt drop their weapon. They don't show broken battered bodies of officers after a riled up mob, drugged individual or someone three times their size gets a hold of them.

They don't show the multiple different cops all of different race, sexual orientation, and faith standing side by side doing the job right.

No sir. The media is all about showing every cop who did it wrong. They are all about division and past mistakes. Brutality toward color, queer, low income families. Thats all theu show. Dont get me wrong it happens. We know. It's a disgrace our brothers and sisters act that way. Disgusting. And sometime it is covered up. Disgraceful. Totally understandable to why there is hate toward those selected ones.

The truth is there are bad cops. They are asshole racist homophobic peice of shits who don't deserve the badge. They need to be snuffed out and extingushed but only from the job. They are out there we all know it however they don't deserve to die for it. Their partners or fellow cops shouldn't be blamed for it either.

And I can guarantee this no one is willing to see it this way right here: Not every black man or mexican on the street is a gang banger correct? Not every Christian is a judgmental asshole. Not every Muslim/Arab is a terrorist. Not every person who doesn't support LGBT is a homophobe. Not every person who owns a gun will be a murderer. Not all kids on the street become drug dealers. Not all black boys in low poverty areas with no daddy around will turn to gangs. Not all stereotypes are real. There are plenty of people who are a exception to the bad stereotypes out there and cops are no different.

They have families who love them. They have children they tuck in at night and read stories to. They have husbands and wives who pray to whatever higher power you believe in they return home safe. They have fears and favorite foods and shows and movies. They have backyard barbeques and birthday partys and hobbies. They have parents who begged them to make a safer career choice while they told them if they are gonna go out of this world then atleaste it's protecting people.

They freinds who worry everytime there's a report over the radio who will come home tonight. They have brothers and sisters on the force who just like them are good and kind and want to nake a difference not be there for a power trip and gun. They went through extensive training being tazed tear gassed and hardass testing to get where they are.

They are black, white, Hispanic ,Asian multirace, Christians, Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, atheist, Gay, Straight, Bisexual. They love movies and shows and junk food. They love vacations and their kids school plays. They love holidays and their families. They are human too and instead of hate and horrible stereotyping teach your children everyone on this earth is human. They deserve respect. They deserve love. They deserve appreciation. We all do. Every single life on this earth matters. Stand up against cops who do their jobs wrong. Stand up for stricter laws and regulations for cops who are on the bad end. They are out there I won't deny that. But Stand up for what's right. Do your research before accusing a cop on the street. Look up body cam footage. Don't look at cell phone videos who dont show the whole thing. Don't harass the officers who have done nothing but serve and protect like the oath requires. Don't make art of slitting cops throats and burning poliece cruisers. Don't spread the hate further. Be the exception. Stand for what's right. Maybe if everyone was more concerned with that than the hate things would be a hell of a lot better.

[vapormaison]

4 Future Funk Releases Deserving of a Vinyl Press

As 2020 looms, I inevitably start thinking about filing for tax returns. Maybe that’s a symbol of the rote, misery-inducing modernity of twenty-first-century life — but I’m trying to take it as a positive this year. Getting some cash back from the Internal Revenue Service means more disposable income to drop on vinyl. While I’ll be spending quite a bit more on Japanese ambient wax this year, I’ll be ear-marking a fair share to go into vaporwave and future funk releases.

With the platform that I have currently, it’s now a definite responsibility to identify some gems that deserve a label to step up and put together a killer release on wax. With the social reach that I’ve gotten in just two months of somewhat milquetoast long-form reviews, it’s honestly a bit insane — but I’m also insanely thankful. I certainly wasn’t expecting over 400 followers from Japan when I’m publishing in English, so — ありがとうございました!

Hi-fi appreciation tends to cross artificial barriers of language and nationality.

Over the past five days I’ve compiled a pretty exhaustive list of 100 digital-only and digital/cassette releases that I’ve streamed the most over the past year. To suss out which releases sounded best for hi-fi consumption, I decided to test them on my two Christmas gifts this holiday — A Cambridge Audio 851N network streamer/pre-amp and a pair of new “anniversary” JBL 4312 Mk2 speakers powered by my vintage H/K 700 series Amp. While most of the list slapped on this new kit, there were four releases that I felt were truly deserving of getting a wax treatment in 2020. These are, in effect, the ones I’d be a guaranteed buyer of. Here they are:

Marsy + HER by Marsy

Admittedly, I stumbled on Marsy’s work just by scrolling through the list of releases through Bogus Collective, which over the course of 2019 has rocketed to the top of my list of favorite digital labels for discovering new artists. While this is of course a fine way to discover an artist — I’m stunned that I didn’t first encounter Marsy’s work on the two most visible channels for future funk discovery and appreciation — Artzie & Real Love Music. Unfortunately Real Love and Artzie haven’t been keeping up with their releases, with the most recent video on youtube from either curator dating back to November 2018. While I do get a deja vu feeling with Marsy — as in, I must have seen them on these platforms before -- perhaps with actually being cognizant, an artist of this caliber should be all over those channels on a basis at least roughly corresponding with their releases.

Do better, fellas!

Marsy’s most recent work is an absolute banger with one of the widest mixes I’ve listened to this year. The JBLs absolutely ate up the rich bass and low-range in most of Marsy’s tracks, and for a moment I had to ask myself how this release was sitting around as a digital-only. This is just one of those funky profiles made for vinyl. That being said, 7 tracks seems a bit light for a twelve-inch LP, so if I was advising a label (happy to do this pro-bono!) I’d maybe pair this album with another robust, high-energy release from Marsy: 2018’s 5-track Her EP, which coincidentally has one of my favorite individual future funk tracks (愛のFantasy) and absolutely brilliant cover art.

 Star Virgin -- サクラSAKURA-LEE 

I’m going to go on a soapbox for a moment here: I don’t like Qrates. I’ve bought from Qrates campaigns before and often find their wax brittle and their presses tinny. Now, there are a whole host of reasons why this could be the case — vinyl necessitates a much longer production line — and this inevitably creates errors. But these errors should be corrected by someone in a quality control department. And if you talk to any of the major labels, relationships with QC/QA people are some of the most essential recipes to a good physical release. This is in effect the primary function of a physical-oriented underground label: ensuring a proper quality press by ordering tests, and keeping limited back stock in case there’s some kind of slip-up. Qrates campaigns don’t offer this in sufficient degrees — and as a result makes a lot of potential buyers feel insecure.

This all said, Sakura-Lee’s unsuccessful Qrates campaign shouldn’t be seen as a lack of desire to support a proper wax release of their iconic Star Virgin release — I genuinely think it’s regarding people’s reservations about dropping $30 or more for vinyl of potentially mediocre quality. Ultimately, this is where labels should step in, build up some buzz, and provide a modicum of quality assurance to truly finalize that sale. I’ve talked to a lot of audiophiles who would love the hear tracks like The Sweet Escape and Feelings with the warmth of vinyl. Sakura-Lee’s sound is so unique and so well-suited to the format. As an owner of the Star Virgin minidisc, I can certainly attest to the quality of that release and the great sound it’s produced on my hi-fi. But minidisc is cold. Crisp, but cold. Star Virgin is musical joie de vivre -- it has all the energy of life itself, and contrasts with the almost archival and clinical nature of the minidisc format. In my view, there’s no doubt that with the right master and press, this would produce an otherworldly sound worthy of its title once it finds its way onto wax -- hopefully in 2020!

Kween Pepsi -- Jesse Cassettes 

Latin future funk is the warmest of all future funk. This is partially because us Latins (your humble reviewer is named Sebastião, after all) are the warmest people in all the world. It stands to reason then, that vinyl, music’s warmest medium — is a natural fit for for the funkiest of all music. I first discovered Jesse Casettes on the Eternal Vibes compilation, which is a compilation full of warm, Latin sounds and Jesse Cassette’s contribution to it was my absolute favorite. I’ve been a huge fan of their work ever since. 

Kween Pepsi is a masterwork that toys with a good speaker’s treble response like nothing else I’ve listened to. Only a few future funk artists can reach this level of playfulness on the high end — Night Tempo, Cosmic Bae, and a few others. But almost none sound quite as fun as Jesse Casettes, and none sound as polished and well-mixed. Kween Pepsi hits you with banger after banger, and the Seikomart tape was already a commercial success. It stands to reason that Kween Pepsi could get a nice master and fly off the market, giving audiophiles another grail on vinyl that stands out as one of the genre’s finest albums of the decade. Bringing it into the next with a new physical seems like a great idea. What DJ wouldn’t want to drop the needle on a track as well arranged and layered Osaka Fall Season Nights and let their system shine?

Miss — Flammy

Real Love beat me to the punch very recently by featuring Flammy on their channel, but Flammy is still an under-appreciated artist that I’m hoping to see 2020 herald big things for. I’ve always appreciated their deeply creative sampling, and their mixes consistently sound rich and full on every hi-fi system I play them on. I happened upon “I bet my girlfriend is chinese and aesthetic” (a title very real for me as my girlfriend is both chinese and aesthetic) back in early 2018 and was instantly impressed on how it made my KEFs absolutely werk in spite of my stodgy old British floor-standers never receiving vaportrap/future hop with very much vigor.

After kind of losing track in the waves of new releases over the past year or so, I re-discovered their work this month after Miss released, and their mixes, creative micro-sampling (City Hunter, anyone?) have been just as rich and rewarding to both my system and my ears as on that initial listen. As I said earlier, I genuinely think this Lille, France-based artist is on the verge of a blowup, and when that happens I want to make sure my childish ranting of “I want this on vinyl!” is heard sufficiently by whatever label steps up to the plate. My suggestion: maybe get this EP on a 10-inch.

[fma245]

High & Low -Tvtropes

Copied from Tvtropes:

Back-to-Back Badasses: Considering this is an action series, way too many times to count. The first movie makes it interesting by having people from different teams have each other's back and quibble.

Berserk Button: Do NOT say the word "crab" around Kabuto. Don't even say anything that could be MISHEARD as crab.

Book Dumb: Pretty much everyone in Mugen and Sannoh Rengokai. Aoyagi: 8 times 1 is 8, 8 times 2 is 14, 8 times 3 is 23...

Combat Parkour: How the Rude Boys fight, and considering they're the only ones who know how to get through the slums they live in, it makes them a really hard target to hit.

Chick Magnet: Cobra Dan: Set up a date for you, me and Cobra. Tetz: But if Cobra comes, wouldn't all the girls go to him?

Choke Holds: Cobra uses them so much that it's where he got his nickname from.

City with No Name: The region is only referred to by the gangs that run it, S.W.O.R.D.

Damn, It Feels Good to Be a Gangster!: Mighty Warriors beat up and steal from others and they love it!

Destination Defenestration: Kohaku kicks Aoyagi out of a 2nd story office in the first movie.

Defeat Means Friendship: The series seems to run on this trope.

Dirty Cop: The only cop with a name in the show is, indeed, corrupt.

Doomed by Canon: The first half of season 2 focuses on how Mugen came to be and their eventual fall. Since you already know Mugen was pretty much wiped off the map, you know things don't end pretty. You also quickly realize that Tatsuya isn't seen anywhere in season 1.

Downer Ending: Season 1 in SPADES. Noboru's turned around, finally back with his Childhood Friends again. He's willing to go down the straight and narrow. But right during his Friendship Speech he's hit by a car, and the episode ends with no clue to his condition. Thankfully it's followed up in season two. End of Sky wrecks you when The Stinger shows Hiroto Amamiya getting show before immediately fading to black.

Dude, Where's My Bike?: Masaki Amamiya got his bike towed in the first movie, to hilarious effect.

Dumb Muscle: Sannoh Rengokai S1 Opening Narration:Sannoh Rengokai. They all grew up under the same circumstances, in the same town. All had a bad upbringing, and don't have much smarts either. But no one matches their strength during a fight.

Elevator Action Sequence: Chiharu manages to trick a member of Daruma Ikka into pushing his teammates into an elevator. He then proceeds to kick stomp them and send them to another floor.

Excuse Me While I Multitask: Hiroto beats up a half dozen guys, while on his phone, trying to order from the vending machine.

Family of Choice: Rude Boys is a gang made up of those left parent-less by either death or abandonment. They protect each-other and consider themselves a big family.

A Friend in Need: The reason that former Mugen members Cobra and Yamato made Sannoh Rengokai was so that their Childhood Friend, Noboru, could have a place to come back to. Despite Noboru almost killing Yamato and Chiharu in the finalie, Yamato and Cobra still try to convince him that they're still friends and to come back. Thankfully they were able to bring Noboru back to their side. This is also why Yamato helps Chiharu, even though he knows it could cause a huge ripple in SWORD as members are not supposed to switch gangs. And thanks to Yamato's desire to help Chiharu, the rest of Sannoh Rengokai comes in to save them as well. In the first movie, Cobra, Yamato and Aoyagi all come together to bring Kohaku back from his Heel–Face Turn - knowing that he's suffering like this because of Tatsuya's death.

Gang of Hats: Each of the gangs in High&Low have a very specific aesthetic. They often take the tropes associated with their groups and turn them Up to Eleven. Sannoh Rengokai: Greaser Delinquents White Rascals: Man in White Oya High: School of Hard Knocks Rude Boys: Le Parkour Daruma Ikka: Thug Dojo Kuryu Group: Yakuza Mighty Warriors: Gang Bangers Doubt: Evil Wears Black Strawberry Milk: Female Japanese Delinquents Mugen: All Bikers Are Hells Angels Amamiya Brothers: Badass Biker Sibling Team

Gangsta Rap: Discovering Wu-Tang Clan's music was what saved Ice as a kid, and it's an obvious influence on how he build up the Mighty Warriors.

Guyliner: Murayama Kizzy, with nailpolish, foundaiton, and lipgloss Hirai from Doubt, with black nailpolish

Gratuitous English: EVERYWHERE. Most of the graffiti in SWORD is all in English. Tons of characters drop random words in English - notably Rocky's catchphrase 'Party Time', and Ice with his catchphrase 'Change or Die', among other phrases. The characters who's actors speak English are much more likely to drop gratuitous English.

Gratuitous Foreign Language: Li, a Korean gangster, has some conversations in Korean in the first movie. It does help that he's played by a Korean singer.

Gold Tooth: Rocky wears silver grills.

Held Back in School: Almost all of Oya High is composed of 20 year olds - because they all intentionally held themselves back so they could stay within the gang. Chiharu Yamato, serving Chiharu a drink: Drink! Oh, wait, you can't drink yet can you? Chiharu: I'm 20. A lot of things happened and I got held back and... Tetz: Wait, you're a real idiot!!!

Improvised Armour: Masaki and Kohaku wrap chains around their limbs in order to fend off a katana wielding opponent.

Improvised Weapon: Too many times to count. Some of the times that are not covered by the tropes below include trash cans, taiko drumsticks, fire extinguishers, motorcycles and a shopping cart. Batter Up! Boulder Bludgeon Cane Fu Car Fu Chain Pain Chairman of the Brawl Clothing Combat Flipping the Table Grievous Bottley Harm Kill It with Fire: Huuga attacked members of the Kuryu with a stick on fire Pipe Pain Wrench Whack

Incurable Cough of Death: It's not specified what Smokey's suffering from, but he's definitely not doing well considering he continues to cough up blood after hard fights.

The Lad-ette: Strawberry Milk is full of rude speaking, bike riding women. However it seems to be a bit of a facade, considering that some of the girls like Junko are a bit girly, but they keep up their Ladette attitude. Junko, much to her dismay, scared off a guy hitting on her by going TOO ladette on him.

Manly Tears: Yamato, Cobra and Noboru all cry in the season 1 finale when they all try to reconcile. In the first movie, Yamato and Cobra cry when trying to convince Kohaku to stop his plan to destroy all the gangs.

Police are Useless: Stated outright in the first movie when the police were too busy stopping other disasters in the area to come and help the main characters.

Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: "It's party time" (Rocky)

Rule of Cool: Why does every gang have incredibly incredible, matching fashion sense? How do any of them pay for anything considering no gang (except the White Rascals and Mighty Warriors) seems to have any sort of income?

Shirtless Scene: Yamato gets a few when he's getting bandaged up after a fight.

Trauma Conga Line: This applies to way too many characters, but below is a standout case: The Amamiya Brothers: Their parents died in an apparent suicide, then the older brother goes off to who knows where, driving the younger two to search for him. When they finally reunite, the older brother ends up dying while revenging against their parents' deaths. Then in the End of Sky movie, Masaki watches Hiroto get shot in the chest by a sniper right before the movie ends.

Two-Teacher School: Oya High has exactly zero teachers. Not surprising, considering the students that attend...

Wife-Basher Basher: Don't you dare hurt your girl in the White Rascals' district, or you're liable for a beating - or worse.

Would Hit a Girl: DOUBT will do anything to get what they want. Up to and including abducting and abusing women. Murayama seemed interesting in fighting a girl who had a crush on him.

Wrestler in All of Us: Cobra manages a suplex in episode 1, but as an action series there are quite a few wrestling movies used on-screen.

[quaymorris]

Album: Femme Fatale

Release Date: March 25, 2011.

Femme Fatale. Flawless Fatale. The beginning of Robotney, or current-ish day Britney. Whatever, I consider this to be the third in the Holy Trinity, but this is where it’s up for debate (as mentioned with Circus). The fanbase is torn on this album. It seems to inspire strong feelings in either direction. Like I said, I love it. It is my favorite Britney album.

This is her sixth album to debut at #1 and the only one to have 3 top ten hits (I know, seems odd). She looked dead inside the entire damn tour, but I honestly just don’t watch those videos.

Robotney incoming!

Till The World Ends | 11 /10

Here it is. My ultimate Britney song. THE greatest song in her repertoire. This is THE perfect club song. I know not because I go to clubs, but because around the time this came out I had friends telling me how often they heard it in the clubs and how much they LOVED it. Catchy chorus + electropop dance beat + Britney = winner winner chicken dinner every time.

The fact that it wasn’t even nominated for a Grammy is the greatest tragedy of our generation.

Hold It Against Me | 8.5 /10

Only Britney could string together a series of hook up one-liners and turn it into a #1 chart smasher. WHO HAD A GREATER INFLUENCE ON DUBSTEP ENTERING MAINSTREAM. WHO ELSE WAS DROPPING BANGERS LIKE THIS IN 2011. NO ONE THAT'S WHO. THESE ARE NOT QUESTIONS, BUT DECLARATIONS OF THE KWEEN'S ALMIGHTY POWER.

Inside Out | 9 /10

#ShouldveBeenASingle #Justice4InsideOut This is Showdown's sexier young sister and it does it even better.

I Wanna Go | 7 /10

Unlike TTWE, the chorus of this song starts to irritate me rather quickly, but I do love me some Britney clapbacks and the bitch delivers again.

How I Roll | 9.5 /10

I am *obsessed* with this song. It's so airy and cheery and fun. And I so pretend she's singing "You can be my fuck tonight ... " because she should be. The hiccup-y beat is just - *chef’s kiss*

(Drop Dead) Beautiful | 6 /10

Simultaneously the highlight of Sabi's career and the finale of Sabi's "career."

Seal It With A Kiss | 8.5 /10

So much dubstep in this album, Dr. Puke does it well. Illicit love is the most exciting kind and that subject matter over a playful beat gives us a nearly perfect Britney Spears song. Flawless Fatale continues.

Big Fat Bass | 1 /10

And right after I called the album flawless. Sigh - This song is bad and will.i.am should feel bad.

Trouble For Me | 7 /10

I love the earnestness I hear in her voice whenever I listen to this song. She's simultaneously begging for and trying to avoid the danger that she knows awaits her. The distortion of her vocals turns the dial up on that tug of war even more, making it sexy af.

Trip To Your Heart | 9 /10

I call this Heaven On Earth's tamer cousin, but it's still a fairly flawless track. The throaty vocals she gives us on certain lines give a raw edge to a rather upbeat, pop-y song.

Gasoline | 6.5 /10

Spark! And it's like gas-o-line! Ok, so they're not the *best* lyrics lol, but you can't deny that this song is catchy af. 

Criminal | 7 /10

Solid song, but it should not have been the third single imo. That video is extra hot, though. Too bad it features her (super hot) loser ex, though.

Up 'N' Down | 8.5 /10

This song could've easily been on the standard edition, replacing, I don't know, Gasoline?!?! I'm glad it's at least on the bonus tracks.

He About To Lose Me | 8.5 /10

Some more illicit love from Miss Spears. We have our theme: dancing, illicit sex, and ... more sex. This is better than Criminal and should've replaced it on the standard edition.

Selfish | 9 /10

Britney takes control and we're all just along for the ride. Count me as here for it slay me Kween.

Don't Keep Me Waiting | 7 /10

If this doesn't scream 90s punk rock pop ... I love how LOUD the chorus gets. It's very in your face on an otherwise straight forward song.

Scary | 8 /10

Sort of like Blackout, the bonus tracks could've replaced certain songs on the standard edition (Criminal, Gasoline, Big Fat Bass, Drop Dead - bye bye losers). This could've also worked as a strong single. It's upbeat and would work perfectly in clubs. And she actually wrote this one so ...

Till The World Ends (Remix) | 8/10

Not as good as the original, but Kesha's slays them vocals on the chorus and Nicki Minaj doesn't get *too* weird thank god.

U N R E L E A S E D  | L E A K E D  T R A C K S

Pleasure You

8.5 /10 without Don Philip, -1,050 / 10 with Don Philip

Sigh, here’s this fucker again. The rumor is that she didn’t actually record this song with him. It was already decided that it wouldn’t be used when Don fucking Philip somehow got his hands on it and added his ... “vocals.”

This person needs to accept that he can't sing, won't ever have a singing career, and move the fuck on. Anyways ... this song, when finished up, probably would've been quite nice, but it's a rough listen right now and hard to judge. ESPECIALLY WITH MR. DON'S AWFUL VOCALS ON IT. Gross - I refuse to believe she would've recorded another song with him.

Unbroken | 9 /10 COMMENTARY: I like this song. A lot. I don't mind her obviously heavily auto-tuned vocals and it's pretty much straightforward pop. That being said, it didn't really fit the album for me. Would've love it to be released as a single regardless.

Burning Up | 2 /10

Eh. It's a decent enough cover, but see all my other comments about Britney's covers.

[neonlichter]

Days Of Steam Episode 10 with Natural Language Processing (May 16, 2019)

Natural Language Processing (WSUM, Madison) delivers 2 hours of bangers and investigations into trance-space. "I viewed the mix as a 2 hour club set in isolation - starts slow, ends slow. I wanted to include a wide range of music the veers towards hedonistic while remaining fully functional and rhythmically interesting. It's a fine balance, in particular for the rave and trance tracks towards the end of the mix. I also made a point to include a number of Madison producers - it really feels like the scene is about to pop and I'm excited to see what happens with it. I throw a monthly party in Madison with some friends. The next on is May 18 with Harry Cross. I'll be opening up for Francis Inferno Orchestra on June 15 and Sandboards on July 7. More parties to come!"

Guest mix from Natural Language Processing Shiho Yabuki – Purple Sails – Hearts Of Space Yoshihiro Sawasaki – Magic Done – Sublime Records Wicker In The Wind – Vortex Incoming – Self-Released Artefakt – Hypnosis - Tikita Future Beat Alliance – Raining In My Head – Suicide Recordings DJ Umi – Unknown - Unknown DJ Central & Erika Casier – Drive (DJ Sports Club Mix) - Regelbau Golden Donna – Submerged – Self-Released Markus Sommer – Mars Exploration - Pager Benoit B – Vague à l’Âme – Wisdom Teeth DJ Umi – Unknown - Unknown Stefan Ringer – Wanna Be Bad – FWM Entertainment Sligo B – Plop – Wah Wah Wino AceMo – REM Dance – Vanity Press Obi – Midnight Hour (Funk Head Lost In Tijuana Mix) – Obstacle Records Beta Librae – Thirties – Allergy Season Trancemasters – Fumets – Echo Beach Sounds From The Ground – Triangle – Beyond Ilana Bryne – Dub Box Medicine – Naïve Direct – Let It Ride – R&S NLP – Baltimore Trance - Unreleased Vinyl Blair – Scratch N Sniff (The One Billion Dub Mix) – Hard Hands Unknown White Label Pete Lazonby – Sacred Cycles (Planet BEN Positive Elements Mix) – Northern Exposure DRS – 3rd Grade - Toolbox Desert Moods – Desert Moods (Desert Dub) – Stress Visnadi – Space Travel – UMM CK – Log Off – No Hands Sage Caswell – For Runner – Spring Theory