#bald man helps me cope

[baldi-datingsim]

[Click 4 better Quality!!!]

Baldi the pose stealer...

[swee7dream]

hiii i saw that request are open for jae ( I CANNOT COPE WITH THE NEWS) so i was thinking if you could write about a fluff kind or drabble?!?! of maybe yn helping jae to cut his hair before enlisting but he has so much hair and like WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO LEAVE YOUR FLUFFY BIG HEAD BF BALD but yea kinda like cute couple-y moment?

military wife duties jeong jaehyun x female!reader

genres established relationship , fluff , angst if u squint warnings female reader , mention of enlistment (◞‸◟；) author's note when nahyuck enlist i will genuinely crash out like i will need to be put under watch dpwm . tysm for the request ! i will miss valentine boy so bad , , tag list @aeriaeri @mystarsohee @iwontlettheselittlethingsslip

“How could you do this to me? To us? I… I thought you loved me, Jaehyun. Does all our time together mean nothing to you?”

“Baby…” He holds your wrists, the sensation barely felt. “It’s just hair.”

“It’s not just hair!” you whimper, lip quivering. “Hair holds memories, Jae. You don’t get it.”

“Believe me, I do. I’m not excited to get my hair buzzed either.”

Your tears, hysterical and warm, Jaehyun’s dimples come out at the sight without even thinking about it.

“Please don’t make me do this.” Your lip quivers.

“I’m sorry, darling.” He pouts, but you can tell it’s ingenuine. “But either you do it or Jungwoo does it. And you saw what he did to Taeyong.”

“Can’t I just cut my hand off instead?”

That makes him burst out in laughter.

“No, you can’t. I won’t allow it.” He brings your hand up to kiss the back of it.

“Can I go in your stead?”

“I mean, you can go… but I’d still have to go too.”

“Okay.” Your voice cracks. “I’ll sign up for the military right now. We can go together.”

“No.” He pecks your nose. “You have to stay right here in our cozy home and live your regular-schmegular life from before I left so that when I come back we can pick up right where we left off. Yeah?”

“I’m gonna miss you so much…” you drop the shaver on the bathroom floor and throw your arms around Jaehyun. “Please don’t die. You can’t die. If you die, I’ll kill you. I-”

Your paranoid ramble continues, your voice getting higher and higher until you sound like the loveliest mosquito Jaehyun’s ever heard.

“I won’t.” He pulls back to see your face. “I won’t die, okay? I’ll call you whenever I can, visit as often as possible, it’ll be like I never even left.”

“But you will! You will leave and I’ll be alone and you’ll be bald.” You sob at the last word. “You’ll be bald…”

“…is that what you’ve been focusing on?”

“You look so good with long hair. You’re the handsomest man in the world but when you have your hair long you’re the most handsome guy in all of the galaxies… I’m gonna lose my boyfriend and his hair. Life is so hard.”

“I know,” he pats your head, pressing his back against the toilet for enough space to let you sit on his lap. “Life is so hard, isn’t it?”

“So hard…” You nod, wiping your tears with the back of your hands. “’m sorry, Jae. You’re the one going to the military and here I am, making a new ocean with tears.”

“It’s okay. You’re okay.” He hums. “Think of it as crying for the two of us. I don’t think it’s set in yet that I’ll be away for almost two years—” You let out a small whimper at the reminder. “—but I’m sure I’ll cry just as much when I’m on the way. More probably.”

“I hate this.” You pull him in, digging your nose into his shoulders to take in his smell and try to imprint the moment as a core memory in your mind.

“…I always could go to prison instead.”

You groan.

“No. No prison. Just… bald.” You sigh, looking up at him and digging your fingers through his cloud-like white hair. “Just bald, egg-headed Jaehyun.”

“Hey, calm it before I buzz your head too.” He flicks your forehead with his teeth dug into his lip. “Then it won’t just be me that’s ‘egg-headed’. Honestly. Where do you come up with these things?”

“Twitter.”

“I thought you said you deleted Twitter.”

“…I lied.”

“Of course you did.” Jaehyun takes his turn now to sigh. “What am I going to do with you?”

“You love me.”

“I do.” His gaze softens and disarms you completely.

“I love you too.” You curl yourself back into him.

“I’ll marry you. You know that, right?” He looks at you.

“…yeah. I know.”

It’s not the first time the subject has been brought up. Jaehyun is a traditional romantic, you learned this within the first three months of your relationship.

Candlelit home dinner dates, weekly sent bouquets, random appreciation sonnet-like messages. Jaehyun has always been open about his desire for matching bands and golden anniversaries. And though you might not have always wished for the same thing, as the days passed holding Jaehyun’s hand in your own, how could you not start having similar dreams?

“You can’t die.”

“I told you, baby. I’m not going to die-”

“You have to come home safely so we can get married when you come back.”

Jaehyun’s eyes light up for only a second before he smashes his lips against yours, eager and clumsy at the thought of exchanging rings. It's your first time expressing your desire to walk down the aisle so openly, a day Jaehyun sometimes felt would only happen in his dreams. His mind buzzes with ideas for the venue, his suit, your dress.

“Cut my hair,” he says, and you feel him breathe on your face.

“It’s not gonna make you enlist any faster, you know?”

“I don’t care.” He smiles.

“…alright.” You pick up the shaver off the ground.

“Why do you have so much hair?” You frown, trying to see where his hair ends and his scalp begins. “Are you a man or a beast?”

“Depends on the location. For example, if it's the bedroom-”

Bzzzt!

“Oh...” You purse your lips. “Jae.”

“…what is it?”

“I’m sorry.”

“What did you do…?” He whispers.

“You’re handsome enough to pull it off, I promise.”

“Oh my God.”

author's note hi ! another jaehyun request coming soon i'm just terrible at deciding on endings lololol . also, renjun is BACK injeolmis CHEER !!!!! would love to write more for renjun so lmk if that's something that interests u :>

p.s. i made a ko-fi . don't feel obligated to do anything with it, but if u ever win the lottery, like my writing, and don't know what to do with it , well . . . gestures vaguely .

[icarusredwings]

Rewatched Deadpool 1. Took notes.

WARNING: Discussion of mental illness topics, ending yourself, trauma, violence, etc.

Civil debate/ conversation welcomed. Sorry its super long. I think a lot.

Notes:

You know what? We see Wade coloring a lot. What's our status on just giving him cartoons snacks and coloring books? He needs it.

I think we all forget how actually impressive this man is. I just watched this cancer having fucker do like 50 flips.

Whatta man is so Logan Howlett coded.

"Bad deadpool" "good deadpool!"

Deadpool has been helping kids for a while. He terrified a little creep while he himself was a huge creep.

Missed up his words and Vanessa smiled at him. With that "aw hes cute" kinda thing.

When talking about their childhood (whether he's lying or not, hes not about the uncle) and he outdos her so much that she giggles.

The first date he takes her ducking skiiballing instead of yk prostitute stuff

Hes so romantic oh my god.

Theyre giggling and joking like all the time. Personally thanksgiving is my favorite scene before he proposes with a fucking ring pop.

I shouldn't laugh but the way he said "wtf" when passing out

Vanessa instantly jumping to "what can we do? There has to be something" makes me instantly respect her as a chronically ill person myself. Partners who medically defend each other make me so happy because a lot of people divorce their partners when they get "too sick" let alone dont show up to specialist appointments.

Him accepting death so quickly is a sign of mental illness, and you can see him be confused on why shes so upset. Shes crying and hes sitting here like "why do you care if I die or not?" He physically feels so unloved that he just doesn't get it.

"I dont know. Might further the plot. " Oh, so you know about wades little mental tv show he puts on in his head as a coping mechanism?

Also... Weasel.. YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS A WEASEL!? Shit sorry wrong movie.

Its not until now that hes crying because he realizes if he does then no more vanessa. We already know hes very co dependent and many people only care about themselves BECAUSE of other people. Which is also considered a sign of wanting to ☠️ self.

The whole "superheros are all lame ass teachers pets" thing is so funny if you think about how much beef he has with the xmen when in reality I have a feeling Wade would love charles in a "Ugh im in trouble with Daddy wheel chair again." COUGH "old bald heavens gate looking mother fucker" COUGH

"Thats not nice" No. But wade is genuienly not nice either.

"This is embarrassing. Please stop, " Colosus said what we all were thinking.

Bro literally cut/broke off his own hand and didn't whine a single time. If you ever. EVER hear this man express pain it is 99.9% his own choice to let you know that it hurts.

During his changing process, Francis says "the only thing that doesn't survive is a sense of humor" wade says "we'll see about that" and smirks.

What also makes sense to me is that he did NOT break easily. They did test after test after test and this man still wasn't breaking. His spirit is incredibly strong and as much as we enjoy joking about how stupid he is, Wade is extremely resourceful.

Its like he has created an alter ego of humor and kindess in order to keep up with the fact he DOES understand how fucked up this world is and whats happening/happened around him but refuses to acknowledge it until he has too. Ussually for survival.

Ive seen theories that he has DID or a type of Scizophreania and the voices in the comics are obviously in his head. I have mixed feelings about it because even his thoughts have thoughts of their own in some cases. Talking to no one is often a sign of abadonment, esspecially in children who are school age and get lonely when taken from their families to attend school. Its almost as if wade never lost his and hes subconsiously talking to himself to keep himself calm/ from panicking in high stress situations.

"But then how does he know hes in a movie" thats the thing. He doesn't. Hes pretending to cope. Main charaters cant die and until he dies he has this mental show/movie going on to keep himself from realizing all of this is true. That this is reality.

Cunningham mentions breakfast for his kids and suddenly, wade wakes up. Hes not joking anymore. This is a "oh shit... I wanna make breaktsst for my kids too... with my wife vanessa" moment.

"So whats wrong with him?"

Diiiiiddd we all forget about scout master kevin? Uncle? Dad? That fact that the oxygen was physically taken from his brain and was given Co2 poisoning over and over? For multiple days? This is the same man who blew himself up just to escape because they told him he wasnt going to see vanessa again.

And then he fought a guy naked, survived the entire building burning down, and now is so insecure about his looks that he thinks he made the baby cry in the street.

Theres people staring at him, flinching away, called names, people see him and cross the street. (So when he tells Logan that he knows his pain when it comes to public settings, hes not lying)

Blind Al is literally the reason deadpools suit is what it is. Why the idiot thought white was gonna be a good idea- See above. Unlike Al, who could smell the blood/ bleach.

I really love al. She's like the adult Toph.

"I hear everything in this duplex." OH, you poor thing.

"The guy that turned me into this freak-"

Al: *bitch im blind face*

As far as she's aware, he looks normal. Which is beautiful when you think about it, but it's funny when you think about the fact that he's so insecure about his face that he purposly found a blind room mate that couldn't judge him.

And they cuddle while he gets dating advice from grammie 🥹❤️

I really like how the entirety of Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Children (HellHouse in the comics) stood up for Weasel. They're murderers. But they're family.

What they did to vanessa was straight fucked. Her fiance up and leaves without notice, youre just trying to work and live your life, you get kidnapped.

Negasonic is so cool. I love them.

Dopinder (The cab guy) is so cool too. I love him too. Kill that guy in your trunk. "Mr. Pool" reminds me of Tom holland spiderman.

"It is not boy band >:(" Suurreee it isn't.

"Wheres your duffle bag?" You mean his dollar general store tree hello kitty book bag filled with guns?

"Cue the music" *no one even gives a fuck at this point when he talks to the imaginary cams*

Negasonic mid battle: Hold on- "Hey Yukio, yeah I just gotta fuck shit up real quick, ttyl?"

"Sure thing! <3 You go baby!"

I dont know anything about negasonic but she reminds me of Gambit with her energy powers.

Like I said. Hes smart when its a serious situation because he immediately threw his katana into the glass so vanessa could breathe, only to immediately turn sappy and childish again when he sees her stab francis with it. Heart hands, is hallucinating because theres a knife in his brain (literally), sex joke. Etc.

Colossus shut the fuck up. Let this man kill him. He's hurt Soooooo many people. A bullet costs less then a dollar. His amount of therapy alone is going to be like *checks calculations* 80 billion.

"Not the nethers" Wade can and often does show proof of hurting but hed rather cut off his hand then let vanessa punch him in the balls. "Ow- owie 5000"

Hello Hugh Jackman.

After not seeing each other for so longer they instantly go back to the fibbing. "I live in the house with 12"

"You live in a house??" Funny guys get the girls. I should know. My wife says im super funny (yes im in therapy)

Pinky promises really matter to him.

Hes such a silly billy he brought out the phone with their song on it. God what a romantic idiot.

[loki-zen]

re: hair loss, at what point as a man should you just shave it? I have/had long wavy Matthew McConaugh-hair, and I’m decently emotionally invested in the compliments I used to get. Outside of wanting to look good to women I don’t super care though, that and that my dad always wanted to grow his hair long but it didn’t work out for him, so I’m kinda doing it for both of us.

anyway, I’m on the road to approaching the “woody harrelson at the beginning of Natural Born Killers” hairline, and it’s a struggle. Been on finasteride for like 8 months, and I’m pretty sure it’s making me depressed, plus it does weird stuff to your cum, which is both gross and frightening in its implications. I had good results with rogaine, should probably start that again, regardless of what I do.

At what point does a man become sexier with the buzz cut a la Jason Statham, every Russian guy, etc?

it’s also frustrating because there’s so many memes out there about “creepy balding guys”, like it’s just this shorthand for being a coomer or a serial sexual harasser or what have you. I could live with “ugly balding guys”, there have been times in my life when I was hot and times I was ugly, I’m able to cope with that. But creepy just really sucks. I had a lot of female friends in college, and some women I’m very close to were victims of sexual violence, and so I’m probably hyper-sensitive and afraid of being perceived as predatory in any way. It’s good that I’m aware of the problems, but sometimes I wish I was more ignorant, it’d make it a lot less scary to strike up conversations with new people if I wasn’t crushingly aware of how often women are uncomfortable with men they’ve never met.

(I’m not morlock-Holmes, but I think we have some of the same dating issues)

So first off, it is obviously wrong and bigoted to make assumptions about someone's behaviour or intentions based on what they look like unless we're talking about something very specific and intentional like 'they have nazi tattoos'. If it helps any (I'm not sure it does) I don't think that these people necessarily see a balding guy and think that's a sexual predator so much as they are doing that very schoolyard thing of "we don't like this kind of people (sexual predators) and so we're going to stereotype them as being something we think is unattractive" (you see similar things with fatness and 'neckbeards').

If it is the women you actually know who say these sorts of things (that wasn't clear), it literally might not occur to them that they're making you feel this way because it's just a general-purpose insult to them that's become detached from the actual notion of a person they might know and like who happens to be male and balding.

This sort of talk is actually, if anything, dangerous to potential victims of sexual violence, because the idea that you can somehow spot Creepy Guys and they definitely look different to anyone else will tend to help conventionally attractive guys get away with it!

I don't think there are any hard and fast rules about the hair thing. Lots of guys do look cute with a buzzcut, and it is common (but not universal) in the dominant Anglosphere culture for people to find this more attractive than even very nice hair when that hair has visible male-pattern balding going on. I confess I do have this reaction myself sometimes, but I also find that the more I get to know people the more I see the nicer hair and the less I see the "but it's balding" part, but there are levels that will always look a bit odd to me (eg the shakespeare cut). Which, yknow, isn't actually a reason why people should change their hair, though I imagine you're asking because being attractive to other people is important to you.

Your female irl friends are perhaps best-placed to approximate the sort of views that predominate among the sort of women you're likely to be trying to date, and there are now decent AI tools to give you an idea of what you might look with different hairstyles - maybe try one out, see what you think and ask their advice.

Oh, also, in my personal opinion if your hair is fairly voluminous and past shoulder length you can get away with a receding hairline a lot longer - same with certain careful short but long on top looks, although they can be more fiddly.

[andauril]

OC Smash or Pass: Silaestra

I did this once before but I only got three votes that time IN TOTAL we can do better than that, right? I mean look at her. She's hot. She deserves more than 3 total votes! This time, the lovely @mercymaker tagged me!

(Artwork by @/ineed-to-sleep, @/dafna-winchester, @/morebird, @/nikoadmeliora & @/cerudinaeart, Screenshots taken by moi)

STATS

Height: 5'7" (or ~170 cm)

Pronouns: she/her

Orientation: bi/pan

Age: ca. 138 during the events of the game

Class: Sorcerer

Race: High Elf (Moon Elf), Bhaalspawn

Alignment: chaotic neutral early game, more chaotic good in the late game

PROS

very patient, good at keeping a level head

very big into consent, she will never pressure you into doing anything you don't want to do

little bit of a tease

polite, but she will swear during sex

fiercely loyal

dry sense of humour

amazing hair and will help you with yours

her ears are very sensitive, do with that info what you want

very good at kissing

if you just want sex with no strings attached, she is down for that too

willing to try things out in the bedroom

will dirty talk you in Primordial

artistically talented, may make a sketch of you or your pet or sth

will literally kill for you, especially if someone wronged you

20 charisma by the end of the game, nuff said

hand kink

praise kink

switch in the bedroom

has a very fine ass

CONS:

daddy issues doesn't even BEGIN to cover it

miserable drunk, you may have to babysit her

emotionally constipated

scared of getting attached but attaches far too quickly

prone to keeping secrets

maybe a little vain so will hog the bathroom to do her hair for 2 hours

may or may not blackout and murder someone or do some other kind of evil shit

copes with the aforementioned blackout murders by engaging in self-destructive behaviour (Loviatar's priest whipping her, drinking ghastly ghost liqour with an undead ...)

doesn't lose her temper quickly but when she does it's not pretty

I shall tag @dungeonsdragonsandlawyers and @naevethewizard :3

[gz-missfit]

Trying to write out something about these 2 from yesterday cause I'm ngl I'm still fucked up about the way the got separated </3

These 2 are gonna be the death of me at some point, and even now with a clearer mind I'm still not ready to cope with what happened pffff.

They couldn't see each other but still locked eyes, Pac having just received a message on his communicator from Fit about coordinates they've been searching the prison for to finally save their Walter Bob. They were quick to climb down the floors to meet up with said man, hushed whispers calling out to him as he focused harder on his work and mumbled his answers to them.

It wasn't until Pac's skin started to tingle that he realized they didn't have much more time to explore, and the glance he could throw at Mike's flashing form due to their potions running out told him he wasn't alone. All 3 quickly said their goodbyes to Fit, appreciating his help and leaving with hearing the apology of not being able to join due to needing to finish this job, the anxiety of losing the position creeping into the bald man's eyes.

The travel was quick, laughs shared as all 3 of them rode their horses, laughing at Richa's stumbling or an off-hand comment by Mike. It didn't feel like a mission to save their friend for a bit, but rather to just meet up with someone they hadn't seen for a while. As the 3 climbed up on the stoney shore dug up by hand and their sons eyes fell onto the edge of the jungle their stomachs dropped. 

Blood.

A trail of blood leading behind the bushes and into the shaded areas deep in the woods that surrounded them. Pac could feel the anxiety claw at his throat, the scratches it made during the time they explored the prison and he got caught in a trap still being raw and sore causing his panic to rise even faster. Glancing at Mike told him his other half wasn't feeling the same type of fear though.

Mike's eyes were locked on the blood, his look dark and threatening like he was just waiting for the person they could blame for this to show themselves so he could explode in their face, and the hisses of anger that erupted from deep within the hybrid made Pac worry about him actually physically exploding. It wouldn't have been the first time.

A rustling of the bushes made Pac swing his head around, his eyes scanning the green landscape that surrounded the trio and it took him a few takes before he noticed the entity floating in front of him. Before he could even draw a weapon he started shouting towards his son, moving to cover him as Mike stepped closer again to see what the yelling was about, hiss dying in his throat like he was frozen as soon as his eyes locked onto the entity as well.

Pac's whole body shook as it approached, his anxiety already being at a high now shooting through the roof as he separates from Richas in a desperate hope to lead the entity away, begging it to follow him rather than go for his son. It was only then that he got a good look at the sword the being now held, it was a longsword. Shattered in the middle of the blade, being held together by seemingly nothing except for lines of code invisible to the naked eye. It shone green, emitting green particles that were glitching out as soon as they fell from the weapon.

Pac's breath caught in his throat.

Come to think of it, when was the last time he took a breath?

Mike's voice cut through the fuzziness of the panic attack that was currently trying to wash over Pac like a wave of ice cold water. He shook his head, trying to look for the location the voice was coming from only to feel a slice at his arm. The blade stung as it pierced his skin and he could feel an almost poison like magic run through every bit of his body. It set his veins ablaze for a split second and once he came back to himself he noticed the items he held dear in his hotbar were now scattered on the floor. Green glitching particles clinging to them like parasites.

He stumbled back, Mike's voice getting clearer now that the adrenaline had pushed his panic attack deep down into himself where it should've been in the first place, he finally finds his voice again as he calls for his other half. Desperate as he feels another slice of the sword in his back as he runs, he ends up getting caught in some bushes, closing his eyes tightly as he calls out to Mike that this is it. That he doesn't want to go but he can see that Mike's sword bounces off the being like it's nothing. That he needs Mike to get out of there, to stay alive. 

Just as he was about a hit away from passing out, wounds scattered across his body sizzling with the same green particles that surrounded the items that got taken from him mere seconds ago and were now scattered across the floor, did he hear a thud. He carefully opened an eye just to rip them open as he saw the thing follow Mike now, his body desperately protesting the movement of his muscles against the plants he got caught in which were ripping at his wounds as he tried to move.

It all went black.

He was soaked.

He could feel Mike's breath against his arm.

He opened his eyes and instantly locked them with Forever, he could see the others mouth moving but nothing was being picked up by Pac's brain, an almost humming static getting louder and louder as he could feel the green particles in his wounds buzz with what he assumed was sick and twisted anticipation of what's to come. 

Looking to his side he could see Mike, passed out after a nasty hit on his arm and hitting his head during the rough teleportation of their shared stasis chamber, Pac reached out through their mental link and physically. Hands shaking at the adrenaline wearing off and pain of his wounds becoming clearer to his mind. He activated Mike's warpstone and set it to the location of their safe room which they spent the day after their prison escape in, looking back he couldn't have told anyone why he did it. Just that he had a feeling that something was going to go horribly wrong and he needed to know Mike was safe. He needed to make sure he was safe. He needed to protect the person he chose to have a bond that goes beyond words with even if it meant sending them away.

Green eyes slowly opened and locked with Pac's dark ones, he smiled sadly as the particles that had embedded themselves in his wounds buzzed brighter setting his body ablaze with a yelp. While Mike's vision got clouded by the purple particles taking him to a location he didn't know. He could see Pac get drowned out by green ones, and before he could reach back for his friend both vanished. Mike's purple cloud taking him to a place of safety while Pac's green one ripped him apart and put him back together a few feet above a deep ocean.

As he fell he could do nothing but call for Mike, pulling at the strings that merged their minds together in a desperate attempt to hold on as the cold water forced a painful gasp out of his lungs. Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes but were quickly washed away by the angry waves that pulled him deep below the water, his lungs burning at the pressure of it and it forcing itself into his body as he desperately tried to gasp for air. He knew he was close to passing out, fear rushing to his mind of this being the end but a bitter smile making itself onto his face as he realized his son was safe, and with how he could now also feel Mike desperately rip at the strings that bound them together it told him he was safe too. He let out a bitter chuckle which forced more water into his lungs as he finally let his eyes fall close from sheer exhaustion, the last thing he did was call back to the ripping in his mind yelling for the others name only to have the strings snap before his eyes. 

Everything was black now.

Tazers mind was now offline.

On the other side of the island a creeper/slime hybrid was now on his knees. Tears flooded from his eyes as he desperately called out to his best friend's name with a voice that's obviously been screaming for a bit now and was at the border of breaking through the abuse his vocal chords were taking. He couldn't even say goodbye, waking up from having passed out through a teleportation only to be met with Pac's eyes and see him be engulfed by a green cloud that made his wounds glow as Mike's warpstone engulfed him in a purple one, the teleport almost made him throw up as he quickly scanned his surroundings only to realize he was in their safe room. One where he'd spent endless nights of being shook awake by nightmares of Walter Bob being taken only to have Pac there by his side to ease the pain of each one. 

The room felt empty without the others' presence, even with it's small size.

Mike could feel the anger bubbling in his throat at Pac for sending him away, not letting him stay, not letting him help. Before he could call out Mike was hit with a wave of coldness that made his bones clatter at how deep it ran into him, his eyes snapping wide open as he realized that the strings in his mind that connected him to someone he couldn't see right now were pulled tightly and being covered in a thick layer of ice that reached Mike's body in a phantom feeling. He scrambled to call back, to call Pac's name the same he had just called his but there was no response. His calls fell onto nothingness as his soulbounds voice echoed in his brain. Mike was panicked about to get up and try to get out of the room where Pac had sent him, only to freeze as a snap ran through his brain. He quickly tried to pull at the all familiar strings that connected to Pac, even with one of them asleep there'd be something transmitted among them even if it was just the heavy weight of a sleeping consciousness. But there was nothing. All he got was a TV static like buzzing and even that felt like utter silence in comparison to what he'd usually get in return.

So here he was now, fallen to his knees as he clutched the Pacman pendant he had held for decades close, Pac carrying the matching creeper one. His voice was hoarse and raw as nothing but sobs left his mouth in hitching painful breaths as his body dealt with the aftershock of burning lungs and freezing bones.

He was alone with his thoughts now, no constant stream of input from the person he chose to spend his entire life with, only a faint buzzing as he begged for that connection to still be there, nothing but silence and emptiness surrounding him.

Mike's breath hitched painfully as exhaustion and blood loss from his wound finally hit him, the adrenaline letting off and causing his body to be hit by waves of pain and exhaustion. He fell forward, landing in the soft padding of the floor of their safe room as his eyes started to fall shut he could do nothing but whimper as his body lost the energy to even fully cry. Hoping he'd wake up to someone else there, but also wishing he would never wake up until there actually was someone there. But he knew this world wouldn't be that kind to him. With a few last painful breaths his eyes finally fell shut as his cries fell onto an empty arena with no one to hear him.

Craft was now alone. 

And he needed to be stronger than ever before.

[comfy-whumpee]

The First Bird 1

In which Avis meets Paris. CN: BBU, religion.

@neuro-whump​, @rosesareviolentlyread​, @whumper-in-training​, @mylifeisonthebookshelf, @pumpkin-spice-whump, @whumpsday, @firewheeesky, @why-not-ask-me-a-better-question

-

It was the fifth or sixth shelter she had visited, depending on if she counted the halfway house with the disproportionate number of polite twentysomethings who had collar scars. It was a neat little house in suburbia with perfect picket fencing and a prominent cross hung above the entryway, that came into view when they opened the door to her.

 She was greeted by a later middle-aged man with hair both balding and greying. He had a warm smile and a soft voice. "Mrs Jacobitz," he assumed, and she nodded. She didn't correct him. "I'm Ray. Come on in."

 She stepped inside, quelling the instinct to remove her shoes. The hall led straight through to a living room and open-plan kitchen, with a doorway to the left that declared itself Ray's Room by means of a small wooden sign. There was a patter of footsteps upstairs as Ray closed the front door.

 "Welcome to our little home," he said. It was twice the size of a little home by UK standards, she thought, but only smiled. "I hear you're opening a shelter of your own in your home country. I'm glad to give you some insight and advice, in return for a hand around the house."

 Avis set her backpack down at the end of one sofa. She was exhausted from travelling, sleeping in hostels and meeting people. But she hadn't yet found someone with the answers. "I'd like nothing more," she told him firmly.

 "Wonderful. Let me take you over our ground rules, first of all…"

It was straightforward stuff. Ray outlined appropriate boundaries to enforce, language to avoid using and behaviours that could be seen as threatening. He explained their daily routine of meals, communal learning, housekeeping and prayer. As he was discussing the safety measures they needed from her, most of which she had heard already, there were light footsteps on the stairs and he paused, head turning. Avis looked too.

 The rescue was tall and thin, with loose, glossy waves of brown hair and a delicate, extraordinarily pretty face. They were wearing an incongruously plain sweatshirt and baggy shorts, obviously hand-me-downs from the shelter's limited budget. They seemed to look in Avis and Ray's direction without seeing them, gazing distantly far away. She'd guess that they were partially sighted, except she knew rescues were meant to have full health checks on arrival. Maybe it was a way of coping with the world, to never quite take it in.

 "Pastor Ray?" they asked, as if to check he was there.

 Ray's tone stayed soft and kind. "What is it, Paris?"

 "I remembered we have a visitor today. Is this the visitor?"

 "That's right. This is Mrs Jacobitz. She'll be helping us out for a few days."

 The hazy eyes touched on her for a moment, but nowhere near her face. Avis felt like she was interacting with a creature from another planet, or possibly a fairy tale. "You have pink hair, Mrs Jacobitz."

 "That's right," she agreed automatically. It was an awkward thing to leave it on, so she added more.  "I used to have brown hair like yours, but I started going grey, so I thought a bright colour would cheer me up."

 "That's nice," Paris said. "Going grey would make me sad too."

 "I'll have to dye my hair pink too, then," Ray joked gently.

 Paris smiled vaguely, as if they hadn't understood the joke but recognised it was one. Still without looking straight at either of them, they drifted away with meandering steps into the living room, where they curled up on the sofa and turned on the small TV.

 Ray smiled at Avis reassuringly. "Paris is new here and still settling in." Translation, Avis thought: Ray didn't know what to do with them yet, but he was doing what he could.

 "Do I need to know anything about them? Or the others? I know the general rules, like about contact and boundaries, the r-word, conditioned responses and stuff."

 Ray smiled ruefully. "Yes, those apply here. Paris is a special case though. They're a Romantic."

 Avis thought back to the model-perfect features and the ill-fitting clothes. Oh, lord.

 "Have you met one before? I expect you haven't. They don't usually…settle."

 "I haven't, no." She took a breath, and consciously turned her thoughts to sympathy. Beyond the cruelties of the pet-indoctrination process, Paris must have been through so much to harm their sense of personal safety.

 "Well, I hope I don't need to tell you that any inappropriate contact with Paris will force me to ask you to leave. This includes if they initiate it, and they are likely to. Forgive my bluntness, but Romantic pets are habitually…indecent. They can't help themselves."

 That sounded awful. Avis couldn't imagine grasping at that kind of behaviour for safety's sake. But all pet behaviours, even those that seemed off-putting, were to feel safe. That was all they wanted.

 "I'll be clear and careful," she told Ray with a frown. "Are they the only Romantic here?"

 "Yes, they are. We have wo domestics, Kellam and Dinah. You probably won't see Kellam, but Dinah will come down and make herself food when she wants some. We also have a Platonic pair, you'll know them when you see them. They haven't chosen names yet, so we tend to call them James and John. They won't talk to you, don't take it personally. Then our oldest rescue is Bryony, she's out at the moment getting groceries." He smiled at her raised brows. "Bryony is a superstar. You'll be just as much bossed around by her as me. She decided to stay here and help others."

 "That's wonderful. I'll look forward to meeting them all, and I won't take offence if they're unsure about me to start with. That's understandable." She sat back on her stool, looking around the spotless kitchen. "So, what can I do?"

 -

 After a day of gutter cleaning and gardening, Avis was delighted to come back inside to the smell of herbs and tomato, and arriving in the kitchen, she saw a tall and beautiful young lady with a little apron around her narrow waist. Mindful of not startling ex-pets, Avis stool back across the room, in the other doorway, before she interrupted. "Hi."

 The woman turned and her eyes widened in a moment of surprise, before she relaxed. "Oh, pink hair. You must be Mrs Jacobitz."

 "I am. You're Dinah or Bryony, I'm guessing?"

 "Bryony." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled. It wasn't a pet's smile, but a proper one, wrinkling her nose slightly. "You've been in the garden?"

 "Ray's orders." Avis looked over as another figure appeared in the doorway. "Hello again, Paris."

 Paris kept their eyes on the floor and acknowledged her with only a faint hum. They were holding a plastic cup between their hands. Now that they were closer, Avis could see that Paris wore a full face of makeup. It made a strange contrast with their baggy clothes.

 Through the back door, a breeze blew a chill into the room. Avis looked back at Bryony, who had turned back to the stove and was stirring in a pan. Paris stood for a moment longer behind Avis, and then suddenly darted across the room to the sink and refilled their water. They were gone again a moment later, bare feet soundless across the floor.

 Avis watched it with bemusement. She wondered if that was one of those traumatised behaviours that passed by without explanation, or if Bryony was the kind to explain and excuse. If Paris was uncomfortable because of Avis, that would be important to know.

 "Ignore them," Bryony said. She took a teaspoon from a drawer and tasted the soup. "They're always like that. Romantics."

 "…I haven't met one before," Avis said slowly.

 "They're trained to be loyal. More loyal than any of us. They're trained not to associate."

 Her heart sinking, Avis simply nodded. What an awful way to feel.

 She learned soon after that Florence didn't eat with them either, but sat alone in their bedroom. Ray portioned out a bowl and some bread for them, and was about to start saying grace when Avis, with a flash of inspiration, offered to take it up.

 "Last door on the right before the bathroom. Be careful," he warned them, presumably because they were entering proximity with both Paris and their bed.

 Climbing the stairs opened up the remaining rooms of the house. There were six doors, all but one closed, the open one offering a glimpse of a tiled bathroom. On the left of the stairs, two closed doors, and opposite, one ajar with a sign saying Bryony's Room on it. Two more closed doors, one with soft TV playing from behind it, that was presumably the elusive Kellam.

 Avis went to the door Ray had told them and knocked. "Paris? It's Avis with your dinner."

 There was a long pause. Avis listened hard, but couldn't hear a thing before the door opened and wide eyes stared out. They moved from her pink hair to the plate in her hand. Then they stepped back.

 Avis followed, and spotted the small table at the window quickly. She set the food down, and then glanced around. The room Paris used was plain, undecorated by anything but a large poster of some nature photograph. There were storage boxes stacked in one corner, but looking at their clear lids, they didn't seem to have things for Paris in them, just general household clutter. They did have a dressing gown and a pair of slippers, a laundry hamper, a table cluttered with beauty products, and a narrow single bed. It wasn't sparse, just…impersonal.

 That was running a shelter on a budget, she supposed. Second hand and generic.

 Paris was watching her looking, so she stopped, not wanting to be rude. "Can I get you anything else?" she asked, feeling oddly like a waitress. "Do you have a drink up here?"

 They blinked owlishly at her. "What drink pairs with tomato soup?"

 Avis was momentarily tongue-tied. She didn't know the first thing about wine. "Uh, I guess water goes with everything?"

 Paris apparently did not see the joke. "Okay."

 Better than nothing, she guessed, and headed down for a glass. She ignored the looks of surprise she got when she took it up again.

 When she returned to Paris's room, they looked at the drink with surprise. "It's not a plastic cup."

 "Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want it to be?"

 "No. But I knock things over sometimes, so Bryony says I have to have a plastic cup."

 "I can get you one, if you want."

 Those eyes turned in her direction again. It was as if Paris was thinking aloud about her, not talking to her, and was always surprised that she answered. "I'm fine. I won't knock it over." They looked at the bowl. "I can be elegant and poised. I can be irresistible too. That's what Sir said."

 Avis buried her initial shuddering response and tried to keep relaxed. "I see. Irresistible to whom?"

 "Anyone I put my wiles to," Paris said. They delivered the words in the same way they looked at her, as though they weren't fully there. "I'm more beautiful than anyone has a right to be, and I'm impossible to pull away from."

 The simple, complete conviction in those words made Avis's stomach turn. There was no trace of ego from Paris in those words. They were taught by the man who had bought them, so that he could be reassured how valuable his purchase was.

 "That sounds like a hard way to be," she said, feeling like she couldn't just say nothing to a statement like that. She had to offer Paris something helpful. "I wouldn't like to be irresistible. It would be too much work to make people leave me alone."

 "I don't like being alone," Paris replied in their lateral way.

 Avis frowned. "If you don't mind telling me, why do you eat dinner alone then?"

 "I don't mind telling you. It's because I'm a Romantic. The others are uncomfortable around me."

 "Oh, that's a shame. I don't feel that way." It was painfully easy, when standing face to face with them, to see how Paris carried their past with them. She hesitated, imagining what Ray would think, before she offered, "Would you like it if I ate my dinner here too?"

 Paris smiled. It was, Avis knew, the trained smile of a pet. But perhaps their choice to make the expression meant something of its own. "Yes, I would like that."

[divorcingjimmatthews]

s2e7 belly of the beast spoilers! rambly rambly thoughts. loved this episode, love this show. sorry, it's very long.

jim, jade and tabitha

CONGRATULATIONS JADE for officially not losing your mind and coming on top of the whole thing. CONDOLENCES to JIM for catching the crazy ball and going full conspiracy theorist now it's him that i'm most worried for. basically what tabitha said. they don't know but they gotta cope with not knowing. i'm glad to see jade and tabitha on the same wavelength about that because from my personal experience i think it's the healthiest mindset you can have in a situation like that. jumping to conclusions like i was saying in my other post is extremely dangerous.

also glad to see jade's first actual contribution to everyday life in the town. hilarious that's gonna be "better alcohol" but awesome that he found something to work on to keep him sane. "i needed a project that wasn't fucking terrifying" i love you jade. your soul is beautiful. also i don't care if i'm grasping at straws but i think victor interrupting him when he was in the middle of his crazy guy skit really helped him stay grounded so he kind of wanted to help tabitha too and that's why he roped her along on his project. like "okay, i'll give you the crazy town lore BUT you gotta do a normal person thing too to balance it out and not lose yourself in this". or maybe he was just lonely and wanted someone to work with him on his project. i've been lowkey shipping them since before they even interacted so i guess this episode was like my personal christmas.

ship or no ship i think it's really important for tabitha to open up with someone outside of her family. it's probably gonna make her family life better to have, you know, friends. jade has a talent for knowing what to say around really heavy topics. telling her "fuck, that sucks, i don't think you're being punished though, i think maybe bad things are just happening and that's it" was really what she needed to hear. in the early episodes tabitha complains to jim that him acting like he knows everything and saying it's all going to be fine like it's obvious makes her feel like she's "doing something wrong". jim's kind of doubling down on acting like he's got it all figured out so i'm glad tabby has a friend that's more on her wavelength now.

i'm fully biased because of my own personal experiences i'll admit it, but i don't think trying to fix a relationship that went south a long time ago is always the best course of action. parting ways doesn't have to be a tragedy, sometimes it's a really good thing. in s1 it looked like they were kinda fixing it but now it feels like they're further apart than at the beginning of the show. i feel really bad for jim but he's gotta pull himself out of that hole he's digging for himself. he's not just jumping to conclusions about things he can't know, he's rejecting reality ("that's what they want you to think!!!" about tabitha defending victor because he's proved time and time again that he's a good man) and leaning on someone that's encouraging him to keep thinking that way and who he barely knows. i'm thinking what other character could help him but i'm kind of drawing a blank. maybe also jade. just pushing my ot3 agenda sorry guys.

donna and fatima, victor and ethan

even though pregnancy in fiction is kind of an ick of mine (SPECIALLY when something goes supernaturally wrong with the pregnancy like, the lord is testing me i guess...?) so i can't really get on board the excitement some of the characters show, i'm really enjoying the "can any of the supernatural wild stuff happening here actually be GOOD" theme with the pregnancy and the changing of the leaves. fatima gave me some strong john locke (the bald guy, not the philosopher) vibes with the pregnancy when she's not supposed to be able to have kids. but i'm not gonna be able to breathe well again until they confirm that's not gonna be some night creature baby thing. if i could i'd honestly abort in that situation like absolutely not risking that possibility like can you imagine? can you freaking imagine. nononono. not taking that chance. nopp.

ANYWAY victor and ethan were so sweet and sad and i'm sobbing. victor saying he wants to protect ethan because bad things always happen to his friends here :')))) give me 10 thousand tissues please. but he let him help in the end and ethan was so happy. i'm actually sobbing. i love them i love them i love them. their friendship has my whole heart. also, love victor's vest.

jim and randall

love himmmmmmmmmmmm love him love him he was just flying his drone, he was going to his nephew's bday and that was such a badass present to give. love this guy what can i say. he has such a cute smile too. he's just got there and he knows nothing and i'm scared for him. the bit he added to jim's theory is SO dangerous though like starting to distrust each other is the last thing they should be doing. hell randall himself could be the person that's "in on it" for all we know, that's one hell of a question to raise if you want to cause disruption on purpose. i don't think he is though but like jim should consider it before he goes around distrusting people that have proven to be kind hearted like victor.

kenny's warning to jade in s1 ("the people who can't adapt here, when they can't bend, they break") rings specially true for jim rn. he's genuinely not past his first impression of victor, who he mistook for a child molester when they first arrived (rightfully let's be honest, he was being creepy to an outside observer and he did point his gun at him). unlike jade who's changed his approach (from "i don't do impossible" to "maybe crazy awful shit happens here and that's it"), jim's been completely unable to get past his first impressions of everything and is cracking under the pressure, and pulling apart from his loved ones bc of it... really worrying.

OK THIS IS LONG ENOUGH ILL SAVE THE KENNY THOUGHTS FOR A DIFFERENT POST

[servitudeofsadness]

For those struggling with the contention of life and death; seek the help you need. surround yourself with your hobbies, with people you love. this isn’t a self help book but it doesn’t hurt to tell you to take care of yourself. trust me i would know.

For those who are queer in this school or are uncertain or entirely certain of your gender identity, be in celebration of your sexuality and your individuality. you love who you love, you are who you are; that is so beautiful. be with those who love you, accept you, and are like you. i’ll be there in solidarity.

For the girls sick and utterly tired of living in this world, I understand. let us continue tilting, killing, and impressing. dismantling the patriarchy, one after another. after all, a revolution doesn’t just take one person. i hope change is not beyond the lives we are living. first though, rest. live. contend with your worries. Revel in your years of girlhood. Take your needed break away from cityscapes and capitalistic warfare. i need it, you probably do too.

For the boys sinking in misery, who can’t separate emptiness and faking vigour. those who perhaps feel too much and can’t direct the storm except with curse words or wall punches. know it’s okay to cry. it is okay to cry —- WAIL, SOB, BAWL! i promise you, it’s the best coping solution. embrace masculinity all you want but stop at subscribing to the bald egg who spouts misogyny; he is truly distasteful in all aspects of man.

For my mum, thank you for being with me everyday of my life. you are an incredible person, an incredible mother to me and my brother. sometimes things get complicated between us, but know that i love you always.

For my dad, we don’t see each other much, but know that the fights are long over and that i miss you. please enjoy my art as it is, if you are able to make it.

For my brother, we scream and hurl at each other a lot. but in my dreams, I sometimes lose you and i die inside. I’m glad I have you as a brother. go chase your dreams. go tell off that bastard back in Taunggyi. Continue doing things out of spite. I am rooting for you.

For Laiya, thank you for supporting me in my creative endeavors by critiquing, praising, and reading my work with genuine honesty. I am so grateful we met, and appreciate our friendship all the way to the end; <3.

For Mr Brandon, my supervisor, thank you for giving me advice, critique, and poetry collections one after another. Words cannot express how much you have helped me with my writing, how much I have improved in allegorically analysing literature since G-8. This means so much to me on a personal level. Thank you.

For me of all ages, 8 years ago, 8 years later and there on after, I hope you remember me fondly, treasure these memories, pursue writing and poetry to its fullest. love dearly. be content with yourself and the world. i trust you to it.

[diaryofme98]

Journal Entry #2

The power was out yesterday and I used the time to read through some of the texts I sent Fabian last year to the fake number. Honestly, now that I know he for sure read all of these, because of Finch (thanks Fabian) it gives me a different perspective on them. We really did bond in a fucked up way in June.

I told him about all my psychosis, every single problem I ever had with my family, my insecurities, etc. I showed him a gross picture of my room, I sent him a picture of my boob, and I sent him a thousand gifs of couples kissing when I was going through the worst of my psychosis and needed something happy to focus on.

The most fucked up part about June is I used texting Fabian as a coping mechanism. I used it to help me with the worst of my schizophrenia. So for him to just... Take everything I said and use it to scare me. Man. It's uncool. It is totally uncool. I thought we had something going with each other. Yeah he never responded through the fake number, but we had a bond going. We were repairing the damage between us.

So for him to fucking go all American Psycho on my ass, get an honest to God bald cap, and scare the shit out of me when he knew how poorly I was doing... It's just fucking disappointing. Like I expected better of him.

I trusted him with the most vulnerable parts of me and once again he fucking disappointed me and betrayed me. He keeps doing this. I don't know how he can drive to my freaking house and scare me then text me telling me he wants nothing to do with me. It's a far distance between Texas and California! It isn't an easy trip to make! He put so much effort into scaring me! He's such a jerk.

I know in his defense I said some pretty not okay things on my texts last year. I mean. I WAS in psychosis. I wouldn't have said those things in my right mind. I certainly wouldn't have sent a photo of my boob either. So it's like. Cut me a break. I just talked about family incest and being molested as a kid. And thank God none of that really happened but ... I fucking thought it did? I genuinely thought my dad raped me? I was paranoid and psychotic. He didn't need to make it worse by scaring me. Fabian could have used the most vulnerable time of my life to be there for me. He could have helped me! Instead he made it worse.

I don't know what to think of Fabian anymore. I know he knows too much about me. The mess that occurred last year... I told him everything. And maybe it is a good thing we aren't in each other's lives anymore. I don't know. I don't even know if I have feelings for him anymore. I don't know if I see him as a best friend anymore. I'd like to. But I probably just need to choose myself for once. I need to protect myself.

I know he's probably reading my blog. He'll probably keep reading this to see if I figure out anymore about him stalking me on a motorcycle. Or he'll just read it in general to stalk me.

If you are reading this Fabian:

I wish we could put aside the bullshit and talk. I won't tell anyone you stalked me last year if you are honest about it. I think you'll find I'm a pretty accepting person. I just want to talk to you. Yeah you did something weird and fucked up, but clearly my texts from last year pissed you off. It's not an excuse but like... I get you are a human. I get you have emotions. I get you have reasons for doing what you do. I'd rather not just be a girl you stalk quietly. I'd rather be in your life in some capacity. I'd be your friend again, if you ever wanted that. I don't know why you are willing to stalk me but you aren't willing to talk to me. Am I that freaking scary? You scared me! I'm not that intimidating. I'm 5'3, I have schizophrenia, and I'm kind of probably just the same nerd you remember dating. I'm not that different honestly. My medicine manages my mental illness. I'm really just- I'm really just okay.

I go to Baylor next year for college. Maybe you'll be more willing to talk to me when I'm away from my family. I don't know why I get that vibe. I guess cause you stalked me. So maybe when I'm alone you'll talk to me. I don't know. I'll move on with my life, I'll do other things, but I'll probably always be curious about talking to you. Not only cause you were my first love, but I think you are mentally fucked up in the same way as me, we are both weirdos as you once told me. And I never did meet another person like you.

[angel-falls-webnovel]

Vol.1 Arrival In Angel Falls Ch.3 Out On The Town Pt.4

“Our first stop is Cogsworth. He’s the guy you go to when ya need fakes on the fly. Then we’ll be headin’ to a tailor. I’ve never been, but Matron Julia was very insistent that I take you to one. She gave me an address an’ everythin’.” Tesla said as she hiked Ever up further on her back. “I normally get my clothes from a consignment shop back in town, but she gave me money to pay for everythin’ so…” Tesla shrugged, trailing off as she walked from the business district into what was more of a residential area, with people sitting on porches and chatting with neighbors. Ever noticed that many of the homes were two stories and had signs outside them that seemed to imply that there were businesses inside.

“Hey, Tesla, are those stores or houses?” Ever asked, leaning their head forward onto Tesla’s shoulder so that they could see her face.

“Oh, they’re both. A lot of people ‘round here run businesses’ outta their homes. Cogsworth is one of them.” She looked at the sides. “Should be ‘round here somewhere? Ah, there!” Tesla began walking toward a two-story house with a sign outside that read. “Cogsworth’s Cogs Smith.” She walked up onto the porch and entered the building with a small chime.

“Welcome to Cogsworth’s Cogs Smith. How can I help you?” The voice that came from behind the counter sounded like it belonged to someone well beyond the prime of their life. It no longer had the vigor of youth, but had a certain tone to it. Like it wasn’t yet done living.

“We’re here to get my friend fitted fer fakes.” Tesla said as she moved further into the shop.

“Do you have an appointment?” The voice spoke and Tesla shook her head.

“I dunno. Maybe.” She turned around, setting Ever down on the counter. “Can ya check?” 

“Of course. If you don’t have one I might be able to squeeze you in, but you’ll have to wait longer for your permanents.” The voice said which Ever could now see belonged to an old man who moved over to a leather-bound book on the counter. He had thinning white hair that Ever imagined had a bald spot under the worn gray cap. He adjusted a pair of half-moon glasses with wire rims and thick lenses. Ever watched as he opened the book and turned to Tesla. “When would the appointment have been made?”

“Umm, early today or late last night,” Tesla said, placing a finger on her lower lip as she spoke. 

The man licked his thumb before flipping through the book and stopping on a page half-filled with illegible writing. He ran a shaky finger down the page before coming to a stop. “Here we are. An appointment for someone missing their left arm and right foot. It’s under a one Ever Moore.” He turned to look at the duo. “Would one of you happen to be them?” Ever raised their hand and Cogsworth nodded, getting to his feet. “Well, we should get started. The process is a rather tedious one, and it’s better to start right away.” 

“Should I move ‘em?”

Cogsworth waved a dismissive hand. “No, no. No need.” Ever and Tesla exchanged looks before watching as he disappeared behind a door before reappearing holding a rusted metal box, which he set on the counter with a loud thud. He began pulling out items, setting them on the counter before shuffling over to a wall lined with prosthetic limbs. Cogsworth pulled two off the shelf before shuffling back over to the pair and placing them on the counter, he reached into the box pulling out a roll of gauze which he handed it to Tesla. “This is for you.” 

“What’s this for?” Tesla asked as she hesitantly took the gauze from Cogsworth who began organizing the things he had set out.

“Wrap that around your thumb and use it to keep your friend from hurting herself. I once had a customer bite the tip of his tongue off.” He said as he pulled a stool around from the back of the counter. 

Ever swallowed asking. “This is gonna hurt?” Ever had never been very good with pain. This may seem contradictory given that their go-to coping mechanism involved repeatedly inflicting pain on themselves until they’d gone numb but, truthfully, Ever thought that kind of pain was different from pain like this. It was different from pain that wasn’t their fault. This kind of pain always hurt much more and was so much scarier. Because Ever couldn’t control it.

“Yes. It’ll hurt. I’ve gotta connect a device that will allow your limbs to access the signals put out by your nerve endings.” He held up a silver cylindrical device that was about two inches in height. “I’d get that gauze ready and hold onto something.” Ever watched as he pushed their sleeve up and brought the device up to their shoulder. The pain immediately spiked as he pressed the object into the flesh of their shoulder. They squeezed their eyes closed, reaching out for something to hold as they cried out in pain. Their hand found Tesla’s as they brought their teeth down on something and given how Tesla cried out in pain, Ever assumed it was her finger. The pain spiked suddenly, and Ever tried to pull away, tightening their grip on Tesla’s hand and digging their teeth further into her finger. 

Tapas --- Substack ---- Ko-Fi

[runthepockets]

Cis people will do Dumbshit and I think every trans person of every race is entitled to talk about their experiences. White or not, you can't deny feelings and humans are a very emotional species. But idk, when I think about the (predominantly black and latino) cis men and boys I grew up around, I don't really feel the need to pose myself as superior or to divorce myself from their experiences, I just feel bad for them and want to help them.

Many of them were impovrished and living at home with a single mom who got home too late to make healthy dinners and had dads in jail or on the run from the law and were deprived of an adequate education that they rightfully deserved and struggling to have healthy relationships with sex and sexuality under an institution that simaltenously saw their bodies and experiences as a commodity and a threat to the status quo, just the same as I was. Most of the men in my family are fat and bald with full beards but that was never a source of anxiety for me, just joy. Black men are rarely afforded the chance to age or show visible signs of aging and even in my closeted subconcious that didn't have the language to express my feelings about my gender, I liked knowing I could grow up to be an aging black man, too. They really stepped up to the plate as fathers and friends and uncles and cousins in a world that didn't want them to, and that's all that mattered to me. I admired and envied them.

White people in general, but especially white men, don't really have this. They're very stubborn and callous and cold, prefering status symbols of property ownership and "breadwinning" and uniting over hatred ala casually calling each other homophobic slurs over video games and organizing coalitions of violence against immigrant families in the rural south rather than genuinely trying to love and understand and protect the people around them. If I were the descendent of lame suburbanites who go to office jobs and make shitty cassaroles and listened to the same 3 crappy Billy Joel songs and thought anything as simple and mundane as "being a man with long hair" was a scathing controversy and stonewalled anything outside their little monolithic fantasy land, I might be as loud and averse to cis manhood as as white trans dudes are, too. But I don't think it's sustainable or effective to further isolate yourself from 1/8 of the human population, especially when those humans are in your immediate circle.

I don't think the obsession with looking 20 and cute and hairless forever is a trans exclusive thing, but I do think white trans men in particular get very in their heads about it due to the fact that the whiteness they were navigating pre-transition always afforded them some level of perceived innocence and empathy that black and brown people (trans or not) are simply not afforded under any circumstance. Though white men are afforded this as well, it manifests less in the form of "the whole world needs to stop because a cute white girl is crying" and more of the sense of "you just shot up a school and now the cops are taking you out for Burger King". They're afraid of what their minds are capable of with a newfound level of privilege and lack of institutions or peers to keep them in check and hold them accountable, which is pretty sympathetic. But instead of starting dialogues with other white men to break down these barriers and trying to reach out to and learn about the experiences of other marginalized men to relate to and cope with this, they beat each other down and further isolate themselves, same as their cis male counterparts. It's all very silly and shortsighted.

I keep posting this, but I wonder if a lot of white trans men feel this neurotic need to cling to "youthful" "nonthreatening" interpretations & presentations of masculinity and feel the need to constantly posture themselves as better than cis men because the only cis men they have experiences with are other white men.

[kingdomcarrots]

So whatcha think of that khdr ending 👀

Okay, beware everybody SPOILERS TIME.

Ngl I expected the worst sooo the ending was fine to me! I expected everyone to die except our chessboys but maybe not that ruthlessly. Thanks gods there was this long waiting so my heart was in peace. I don’t think I’d have been that calm if they had released the chapter one by one like before fjgkfkf

Baldr was no a surprise too. How a clingy baby boy like him could have coped so easily the lost of his sister? Nice move Darkness!

I’m happy that Nomura says that he want to tell more about the upperclassmen in another media ‘cause…

THEY ALL PERFECT. WE SEE SO FEW OF THEM BUT I LOVE THEM VERY MUCH AAAA

ESPECIALLY YOU HELGI.

Do you sense that strong himbo energy? AH! DELICIOUS.

Very fond of Claude Vidar too. The Pre-Xehanort! Heart too soft to go this far for summoning Kingdom Hearts, you tried babe! So, that’s why he shares some features with Xehanort? Dark skin, almost gold eyes…? Eh. [shrug]

I’m glad we know who was the mysterious dude on DI, raising a child by their own one a tiny island (btw, didn’t DI has MAIN ISLANDS? I know “to protect from Darkness“ blabla but srly? It’s a PLAYGROUND FOR KIDS. So then -gasp- the caban and so on were their doing and not Sora and co… omg it gonna be meta again. We built OUR PLAYGROUND) buuuut I’m also a bit disappointed haha I liked the “WE WERE XEHANORT ALL ALONG“ thing 8D

Thinking that I was joking about that very page in the Ultimania book back then “aww what a nice family portrait!” L O L Thanks Nomura for the hint. Now, BRING US MORE ABOUT ERAQUS TOO. He’s like what he says: There’s more to light than meets the eye. I knooooow iiiiiit.

Pretty sad about Xehanort hearing “you’re the Child of the Destiny“ ���you’re the Chosen One“ to realize that no, you’re not, it’s Sora the Chosen One. And thus, bequeath the X-blade to him at the end of KH3. You’ve followed the dark road sweety, thinking it would be the only way. Maybe you could have been that Child following the other way… Like Anakin and Luke. The father failed but the son succeeded. The son was the real hope. …father and son… [shakes her head to get the idea out of her brain]

AND WHAT ABOUT THE HAIR?

Well, headcanon the Dark road made him bald still lives for me but with the help of a razor LOL What a dramaking.

That sadness in Eraqus’ eyes [fist clinched] The sadness of a man knowing what he must do. No one can stop me thinking that he’s somehow worst than Xehanort cause he trained and sacrificed his apprentices to stop his ex-husband. The true Champion of Light. Who can make sacrifice for the commun good. Speaking of Light…

POINT FOR VANITAS. It struck me back then after my second or third run of KH3 which coincided with the end of KHUX. When you defeat Vanitas he does this gloomy talk about I’m Darkness blabla yeah yeah I get it poor little emo meow meow. But he IS LITERALLY DARKNESS. Then, Xehanort truly saved Ventus by draging out them of Ventus’ heart to defeat him without hurting Ven (well he tried at least thus giving him to Eraqus to heal him) cause… he’s one of the friends he used to dream about.

Could Sora be able to do that with the Lost Masters too? To save them and annihilate the Darkness at the same time? We all know he will do that.

OMG I ALMOST FORGOT THE RAT.

Well. I knew it. Damn you Luxu LOL

Ok, one last question remains… If we break the Internet, will the 4 trapped Darkness release? _(:3 」∠)_

[gently hold those tiny old men on my heart]

[randomshyperson]

Sorry for your loss - Final Chapter

Summary: When your wife Natasha passes away in a car accident, a part of you dies with her. It takes a few months of mourning for your psychiatrist thinks the best alternative is for you to join a grief group. And there you meet Wanda Maximoff, and learn to live again.

Warnings: (+16) mentions of death, panic attacks and anxiety, grief, self sabotage, mentions of abusive family background, mutual attraction pining, explicit consent, therapeutic conversations about death, self-deprecation, healthy methods of coping with grief, possible triggers about anxiety, domestic Wanda, hurtful behaviors. 

Chapter Warnings: Mention of Smut, Brief Smut.

Tag list: @mionemymind / @abimess / @stephanieromanoff / @yourtaletotell / @tomy5girls / @justagaypanicking / @thegayw1tch / @idek-5 // @myperfectlovepoem // @imapotatao // @aimezvousbrahms / @ensorcellme/ @helloalycia // @myperfectlovepoem

Author’s note: I don't know what to say exactly, just good reading, and sorry for any spelling/translation errors. I hope you enjoy the ending, and who knows, maybe a second season?

Read on AO3 || Serie Masterlist here

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Chapter Five - I will love again

You were up early on the weekend.

Since you were going to travel to New Jersey for Wanda's father's wedding anniversary, you didn't want to keep her waiting.

When you arrived at Wanda's house, she was already on her feet, running back and forth through the house, trying to find Tommy's lost toy, who kept crying that he wouldn't travel without it.

"Make yourself at home, I just need to find that bear." She said to you as she opened the door. You placed your only luggage on the floor as you looked around. Billy was watching television, and Tommy was sitting on the kitchen counter, crying.

You walked over to him.

"Hey, Tommy, why are you crying?" You asked stopping beside him, keeping your voice calm so as not to make him more nervous.

"I want my teddy bear!" He cried out between tears.

"Mommy will find it for you." You reply. "What is the name of your teddy bear?"

"Star Lord." Sniffles the boy. Your distraction is working, because he stops crying to talk.

"Wow, that's an incredible name!" You say. "How did you get the Star Lord?"

Tommy sniffles again, wiping his tears with his forearm.

"I got it for my birthday." He counters. "Billy got a skateboard, but Star Lord is cooler."

"Is that so?" You retort with interest in your voice, realizing that Tommy was barefoot and his socks were on the countertop, you show him that you are interested in hearing him talk as you help him finish getting dressed for the trip.

"Yes, it came in a huge, red box." Tommy counted with a smile as he gestured at the size of the object. "And he sleeps with me every night, so I need him to go to Grandpa's house."

"Oh, yes, of course you do." You agree with a smile as you tie the boy's shoelaces. "Do you remember the last place you played with Star Lord?"

Tommy sniffles thoughtfully.

"I don't know." He replies tearfully, you rush to ask about his favorite memory with the bear to avoid him to cry again, and it works.

When you finish tying the child's shoes, you pick him up on your lap as he tells you about the day he took Star Lord swimming, and then you sit him down in the living room next to his brother, and he is distracted enough by the cartoon on the TV to forget about the teddy bear.

Wanda joins you in the living room a minute later, looking nervous and with her hands empty.

"Hey, I think I have an idea." You tell her as you mentally review the things Tommy said. "Finish getting them to the car, I'll go find the bear."

You found it.

Ten minutes after you left the room, inside the pool.

Wanda couldn't hold back her laughter when you arrived in front of the car with your wet clothes up to pool height.

"Your idea was to get into the pool instead of using the cleaner to reach the bear?" She teased as soon as you handed her the toy. You laughed awkwardly, watching her give the bear to Tommy and seeing the boy celebrate excitedly. "You're not getting in my car wet like that."

You laugh, and then you have an idea. Approaching Wanda with open arms, you see her raise her finger in warning, but you are already hugging her with wet clothes, making her laugh.

The joke only ends because Pietro is parking the car in front of the house next, looking at you both curiously.

"Should I let dad know we're going to be late?" He teases putting his sunglasses up. You let go of Wanda as both of your giggles slowly stop, the two of you looking like children who have been caught up to mischief. "Come on girls, we have a road ahead of us."

"Shut up Pietro." Wanda grumbled humorously, starting to push you into the house by the shoulders. "Watch the boys while we get changed."

"Yes, ma'am." He retorted wryly as he took off his seat belt and got out of the car. You let Wanda push you inside.

Upstairs, you had smiles on your faces as she searched for clothes that would fit you.

"Are you sure it isn't better if I grab something I brought in my suitcase?" You ask distractedly as Wanda rummages through the closets.

"I don't want you to be one change of clothes short, I don't know what we'll end up doing over there." Wanda retorted. "And don't worry about it."

Wanda eventually handed you a set of very soft sweatshirts and underwear. You smiled in appreciation, looking away from the clothes in your hand to the woman in front of you.

As you turned toward the bathroom, Wanda spoke.

"You can stay."

Swallowing dryly, and ignoring the unregulated beating of your heart you turned to her again, one eyebrow raised not sure you had understood correctly.

Wanda sighed heavily, as if she was gathering the courage to say it again. But her gaze said it all. She was inviting you to change in front of her.

You felt your face heat up, but you gulped dryly, forcing yourself to reason correctly.

"I... I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not?" Wanda retorted in defiance, and you let out a breathless laugh. She seemed to misunderstand your reaction, because her expression immediately fell. "Oh, you don't want to. Damn it, I..."

"What?" you interrupted quickly. "No, Wanda. I want to." You confess half breathlessly. "I really do."

"Oh." 

You shift your weight between your feet, feeling your stomach turn with the way Wanda looks at you. 

"But not like this." You say, swallowing dryly to confess correctly. You approach Wanda slowly as you speak. "Not in a hurry." Wanda breathes heavily, leaning back against the cabinet. You stop walking just inches from her body. "I want to be with you, with enough time to kiss every inch of your skin.” You confess again her lips. “Touch every spot that will make you lose control and scream my name."

"Fuck." Wanda gasped against your mouth, almost near enough to touch while closing her eyes. 

Ignoring the tightening sensation at the tip of your stomach, you fought your baser instincts and pulled away, sighing.

"Let's hurry before your brother comes to get us."

You smiled at Wanda, ignoring the urge to kiss her. She just nodded, trying to normalize her breathing. You took advantage of her lack of reaction to turn around and walk towards the bathroom. You had better get out of there soon, because you feel that you couldn't resist that woman again.

//-//

Tommy and Billy were singing in the back seat as you drove to New Jersey. You laughed at the scene, thinking they were adorable.

Your gaze was watchful on the road, following Pietro's car to his father's house.

When Wanda began to murmur the song, you looked at her for a moment. Absolutely stunning, with her red hair flying in the wind, the smile in the corner on her lips. The sunlight making her eyes sparkle.

Turning your attention forward because Wanda caught you looking, you bit back a smile, feeling your heart race a little. But neither of you commented, and you didn't care that Wanda was looking at you now.

//-//

When you arrived, you whistled impressed at Erik's residence. It was practically a mansion, but really it was just a very well built summer house. The neighborhood was very nice too. Wanda smiled playfully at you when she noticed your reaction.

The boys ran out of the car, excited to hug their grandfather who was already waiting for them at the door. They also hugged Charles, who was a short, balding man, very friendly.

"Grandpa, can we go ride the horses?" Tommy asked excitedly, and the man laughed lightly. 

"Go wash your hands and get something to eat first okay, boy?" Erik said to the boy, ruffling his hair.

The child agreed, entering the house along with his brother and his cousin, who had gotten out of the cars shortly after.

You were unpacking the bags from the car after parking and felt your breath catch when Wanda picked up one of the bags and caressed your hand with her fingers as you handed it to her. She smiled innocently, passing you to walk toward the door, and you cleared your throat before closing the trunk and following her.

"You must be Y/N." Erik greeted you as soon as you came to the door. "It's very nice to finally meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too, Erik." You replied with a smile. "And you too, Charles."

The man smiled, giving you room to pass him and enter the house. Wanda was standing in the living room next to Pietro and Monica, who had their suitcases on the floor.

"Papa, which rooms are empty?" She asked the man who had entered behind you.

"You can occupy any one upstairs." Erik warned closing the door as he and Charles entered.

You accompanied the group upstairs. Wanda placed the boys' backpacks in one of the bunk rooms, since the children always slept together. 

"You can have the room down the hall." She said, showing you the direction. "Next to mine."

She whispered the last part like a secret. You wanted to ignore how your stomach churned at the suggestion. Pietro and Monica passed you both, the man gave you a playful look, but made no comment. They would be in the room across from yours and next to the children's.

You guessed that the other door at the other end of the hall belonged to Erik and Charles

After putting your suitcase on the bed, you left the room. Pietro opened the door at the same moment.

"Come on, Y/N, I'm going to give you a full tour of the Maximoff residence." He announced excitedly and you giggled, following him around the house.

//-//

The Maximoff residence was much larger than you thought it was. There were even stables and a large wooded area that was part of the place, but Pietro didn't take you there, he just pointed you in the direction. You eventually discovered that the place used to be a simple farm, inherited from Pietro and Wanda's paternal grandparents, and when Erik married Charles, they renovated the place with money from the Xavier family, who were British and had a fortune built up in the vineyard area.

Pietro led you back to the kitchen when he finished showing you the property, patting you on the shoulder as he sat down on the kitchen counter, grabbing the jar of candy on the counter.

"The guests will be here soon, Pietro, get down from there." Warned Erik noticing his son's position. He was in the kitchen too, finishing sorting out some of the appetizers. During the tour, you noticed the decorations set up in the gardens, some tables and chairs and party decorations.

"Yes, papa." Grumbled Pietro as he obeyed. He reached over to accept the tray of food his father handed him.

"Take that outside please." Erik asked and you moved to get out of the way of Pietro, who gave you a wry smile as he passed, making you laugh slightly.

"Can I help too?" You asked noticing that there were still things to be carried.

"Thank you, dear, you are very kind." Erik said as he handed you one of the trays. You nodded and then turned around.

The garden was really nicely decorated, you noticed now that you were up close, placing your tray on one of the tables. There was also a small stage, which you imagined was meant for Erik and Charles to repeat their wedding vows. You smiled, remembering how your marriage to Natasha had gone. It was just nostalgic to think of her now, and it didn't make you unhappy anymore.

"I think you're all set now." Erik said behind you, arriving with a tray and placing it on the table next to yours. Pietro who had left earlier, was stealing one of the candies and received a disapproving look from his father. "Really, boy?"

Pietro laughed, raising his hands in surrender.

"I'm hungry, papa." He playfully retorted and you laughed at the interaction.

"Go help the ladies with the kids." Erik commands with a grimace, and Pietro laughs as he walks away. When he leaves, you feel slightly anxious about being alone with Wanda's father, but his posture is friendly. "I haven't had a chance to talk to you properly, Y/N. Would you like to take a walk with me before the party?"

You ignore the nervous feeling in your stomach when you agree. And Erik takes one last look at the decorations before leading the way.

//-//

A few minutes of walking later, where Erik asked you several questions about your life, your job, your age, who you lived with, that sort of thing, you reached a plantation area. You imagined it to be the vineyards of the property.

You could see the manor house in the distance, and the backyards, and a lake many meters away. The landscape was breathtaking.

"It's beautiful here." You comment beside him.

"Yes." Erik agrees with a smile, also looking at the scenery as you do. "I enjoyed your conversation, you are as lovely as Wanda usually tells us."

The comment makes your cheeks warm, the image of Wanda talking about you makes your heart soar. Erik seems to appreciate the way you react to it, smiling gently as he adds, "It's nice to know she's found someone nice to love."

You swallow dryly, glancing quickly at the man next to you, but he has his gaze on the landscape. You feel a warmth in your chest, mixed with embarrassment and happiness.

"Thank you, Erik." You say clumsily. 

"For what?"

"For accepting me here I guess." You retort with a smile. "For having me into your home. And well, for saying those things about me and Wanda." You say and he makes an understanding noise through his mouth. You are silent for a moment, until he speaks again.

"You know, when Magda, their mother, passed away, I thought I would never love anyone again.." Erik tells nostalgically. He keeps looking at the field in front of you, but you stare at him, attentive to his words. "But then I met Charles. And well, it did. It's different from what it was before. And I wouldn't change it for anything."

You nodded in understanding, letting the words echo in your head. You also think about how Agatha said you could move on. There was no problem in loving again, as intensely as before.

"I figured I'd be uncomfortable talking about someone marrying my daughter, but here we are." Erik comments humorously a moment later, making you chuckle awkwardly. "I guess it must be the way you look at her. You look like a lovesick puppy. "

You scratch your neck awkwardly, looking at the scenery, making Erik laugh at your blurriness.

"Don't get upset, I'm just teasing you." He comments with a smile, patting you on the back. You laugh clumsily.

"Do you guys have a garden around here?" You ask trying to change the subject, just as you notice the glass structures in the distance, capped by the vineyard. You figured if you turned around you would find your way to them.

"Oh, yes." Erik confirms. "Charles loves gardening. We have two greenhouses over that way. Would you like to see them?"

"Yes." You confirm with a smile. "But it can be after the party."

"Oh yes, I should get back and welcome the guests." Erik agrees as he checks his watch. You start walking back to the area of the house next.

//-//

You meet a lot of people at the party. It's a little overwhelming, because you really didn't expect Erik to invite so many people, and although you're glad that they had so many friends, your anxiety has increased a little. You were smiling politely at two ladies who said they were Charles' college friends while trying to pay attention to the story they were telling when Pietro rescued you.

"I need to steal my sister-in-law for a second ladies." He said and you widened your eyes. He only realized the mistake of his words when he noticed the looks on the women's faces in front of him. " Shit, I don’t mean like she got married to Wanda... I..."

You snuck out from behind Pietro when the ladies started attacking him with questions about the wedding, and when the ceremony had taken place and why the family wasn't called. You took the opportunity to escape when Pietro was convincing the ladies that you were not Wanda's wife, and that there was no secret wedding.

Walking over to one of the far tables, you frown in disbelief as you watch Luna run under the food table, clearly looking for a place to hide from her cousin, who is looking around a few feet away.

You crouch down, pulling the towel up to speak to the child.

"Luna, honey, maybe that's not the best place to play." You tell her with a smile. She looks around.

"Sorry, Aunt Y/N." She asks. "I'm hiding from Billy."

"Oh, is that so?" You ask extending your hand to her. She accepts, and you help her stand, taking care that she doesn't hit her head on the table. "Do you remember the path we took when we first got here? Try to hide behind that tall statue, I'm sure Billy won't find you."

"Wow, that's right, Auntie. Thank you." She mumbles, leaving with her head down next, watching for any sign of her cousin. You smiled, knowing that everyone at the party would get a glimpse of the children playing if she stood where you spoke.

You noticed that the two women who were talking to Pietro looked at you, and not wanting to be dragged back into that conversation, you made your way back to the house.

Bumping into Wanda on the way, you giggled.

"There you are." You remark.

"Where were you?" Wanda retorts with a mixture of curiosity and humor, noticing your "escape mode" posture.

"Well, apparently all of your father's friends like to meet everyone, so I've spent the last thirty minutes being introduced to everyone at the party."

Wanda gave a pout of pity.

"Sorry, dear." She says and you smile awkwardly, feeling your cheeks flush. "I'm looking for the boys, they need to change for the suits." 

"I saw Billy in the gardens." You tell her as you gesture briefly in the direction. "I'll go find Tommy for you."

Wanda smiles, biting her lips. You nod but when you make mention of moving away, she holds your forearm and moves forward, depositing a kiss on your cheek. 

"Thank you, sweetheart." She whispered, smiling mischievously at you before she turned away and left the kitchen. You bit your lip, feeling your heart racing. You didn't understand why Wanda was teasing you, but you weren't complaining.

//-//

Non Readers Pov

Wanda laughed affectionately when Billy launched himself onto her lap as soon as she found him in the backyard.

"Luna, dear, your mother is calling you too." Warned the red-haired woman to her niece who nodded turning toward the direction her aunt pointed. 

"Mommy can I play after I change my clothes?" Asked the boy as the woman carried him back to the house.

"Of course honey, but you have to be careful, okay? You can't get your suit dirty."

Just before she reached the entrance, someone called her name, causing Wanda to turn her head curiously.

"Sweetie, I need to ask you something." It was Ruth Eisenhardt, a nasty distant cousin of Wanda's known for gossiping, and lots of it, about all her relatives. "I just heard from Aunt Susan that you are dating that pretty girl you brought over." 

Wanda felt her face heat up, but kept her expression impassive. Before she could add anything else, the woman was speaking again.

"Of course we are all happy for you, but when I went to share the good news with Uncle Jeff, he said that Pietro had already denied this affair. Now I'm left not knowing if you're really going out with that beefcake."

Wanda let out an awkward giggle, frowning slightly at the way her cousin spoke.

"We're not exactly together, cousin." The redhead replied. "But that's not really your business."

Ruth grimaced in surprise, but then her expression changed to one of malice.

"You know, I'm just confirming it. Because after all, we don't have pretty things like that lying around in New Jersey."

Wanda clenched her jaw. Ruth was exactly the kind of girl who had a mania for taking what didn't belong to her.

"Cousin, don't flirt with her." Wanda said. "I'll only warn you this once."

Ruth giggled, surprised at the reaction. But Wanda didn't continue the subject, turning and continuing toward the entrance of the house.

"Mom what's flirt?" Billy asked next, drawing Wanda's attention away from her own not-so-pleasant thoughts about someone taking what was hers.

"It's a way adults talk, honey." Wanda explained, biting her lips thoughtfully briefly. "When they want to be more than friends."

"Like best friends?"

Wanda laughs briefly, denying it.

"No, Billy. Like lovers."

Billy makes a noise of agreement. "Why can't Aunt Ruth flirt with Aunt Y/N?"

Wanda sighs lightly, forcing a friendly expression so as not to confuse her son.

"She can."

"But you told her..."

"I know." Wanda interrupts with red cheeks. She takes a deep breath, smiling at her son. "Can I ask you something sweetie?" Billy nods in agreement. "If mommy started dating someone, would you be upset?"

Billy frowns, denying it.

"Mommy, you want to date Aunt Y/N don't you?"

Wanda's eyes widen in surprise.

"Where did that one come from?" she asked.

"You didn't like it when Aunt Ruth flirted with Daddy either, I remember Aunt Monica's birthday." He tells, and Wanda sighs slightly, remembering when she caught Ruth complimenting her husband as she ran her hands through her hair, and Wanda might have gotten a little carried away by accidentally flipping a wine glass in her cousin's lap. On the way home, when the twins asked, she said that she was upset with the way Ruth spoke to their father, and now Billy was able to understand everything. "And now you don't want Aunt Ruth to talk to Aunt Y/N like that." He concluded as if it was obvious. Wanda smiled as she went upstairs, careful not to trip on the steps with Billy on her lap. "Mommy, if you date Aunt Y/N will she move in with us?"

"I don't know dear." Wanda replied with a shy smile. 

"If she lives with us, will you let her sleep in my room?"

Wanda laughed, looking at Billy curiously.

"And why is that?"

"Because she knows how to play dragon. And also tell fairy tales." He says counting on his fingers. "And she also helps Tommy with his headache, so she can sleep on our rug and when he wakes up at night, she helps him."

Wanda smiles fondly, shaking her head slightly.

"Those are very good reasons indeed." She says. "But I think Y/N would like to sleep in a bed, no? The floor is uncomfortable."

Billy looks thoughtful and Wanda laughs briefly as she sets him down on the floor, already inside his room. She helps him out of his clothes to put on his party suit that is already on the bed.

"I can sleep in your bed mommy, and then Aunt Y/N sleeps in mine next to Tommy so he won't be alone."

Wanda laughs again, denying with her head. She bends down to button her son's shirt.

"Tell you what. Y/N sleeps in my bed, and if Tommy feels bad, she goes up to his room, how's that sound?"

//-//

Reader pov

"I think it sounds amazing." You spoke as you entered the room, a mischievous smile on your lips. Wanda startled slightly, surprised that you arrived at that moment, but she smiled shyly as she looked at you before turning her attention back to her son. 

"Yay, mommy!" Billy spoke excitedly. Wanda sat him down on the bed again, helping him put on his shoes. You guided Tommy gently by the shoulders to the bed, and as soon as he had a look at the suit he began to undress.

"I didn't know you were going to live with us, Aunt Y/N." Tommy comments as he removes his sneakers.

"I didn't know either." You retort, biting back a smile at the sight of Wanda's reddening cheeks. "I guess your mother forgot to invite me."

Wanda mumbles at you to shut up, making you smile.

"Mommy, you have to let Aunt Y/N know that she is going to live with us now." Billy said making you cross your arms, and turn to Wanda, joining in on the joke.

"Yes, Wanda! You need to let me know about these things." You say with false seriousness, and Wanda rolls her eyes in amusement, finishing putting on Billy's shoes and getting up to face you.

"Y/n, honey, you're going to move in with me when we get back home, okay?" Wanda asks in the same tone. You bite back a smile, ignoring how your heartbeat has quickened. You can't help but look at Wanda adoringly however, and her expression goes from playful to shy in microseconds.

"Okay, Wands. I'll love living with you." You say to her next, sounding slightly affected. The twins let out an exclamation of excitement, and break the bubble you are in. You clear your throat slightly as you turn your attention back to them, looking away from Wanda.

"Wow, you guys look great." You comment as you see the boys properly dressed next. The suits are very nice indeed.

"You can go back to the party, but be careful not to get your suits dirty. No playing in the dirt!" Wanda warns the boys, who are already running excitedly outside. 

"Okay, I'll go get ready too." You say next, thinking to check your cell phone as well, since you haven't turned it on since you left New York. "See you at the party?"

Wanda nods in agreement and you turn to leave.

At the door she stops you, pulling you by the forearm lightly and raising her hand to your neck, then bringing your lips together.

You both sigh and you feel your whole body tense up and heat up all at once. Wanda pulls away in the next moment, breathing as out of rhythm as you do.

You want to ask her why she did this now, but you think the question can wait until later, because she brings your lips together again, in a kiss far less innocent than before. Wanda closes the door with one hand, and with the other she pushes you against the wood. 

You gasp, letting your tongue run across her lip, and she gives you passage.

Her taste intoxicates your senses quickly, your hands moving up to her waist as hers move to your hair, deepening the kiss. You both gasp for air against each other's mouths, unable to separate. 

Panting, you feel your head spin as Wanda moves her tongue against yours, slow and sensual, and you can't help but squeeze her waist tightly, enjoying the feeling of her sighing against your lips.

You switch positions next moment, pressing Wanda against the wood of the door, your knee coming up between her legs. 

"Oh." Wanda moans breathlessly breaking the kiss. You move your kisses down her jaw to her neck, sucking on the skin and releasing just before marking. Your fingers play with the hem of her blouse, and Wanda brings your head up, kissing you again.

You press your body against her, wanting her to be touching you everywhere. The sensation makes you breathless, and hot in all the right places, causing you to moan.

You think you could kiss Wanda forever if she'd let you. The feeling of having her in your mouth is the best you have ever felt.

There are noises of footsteps coming from the stairs, and you both sigh when you hear them. It's Monica coming up with Luna, who is chatting animatedly. It's just what you need to snap back to reality, and slow down the kiss. 

You keep your foreheads together, and your hands around Wanda until the sound becomes distant, signaling that Monica has entered their bedroom with Luna.

You let out a giggle, and Wanda follows you. You look just like two teenage girls making out in secret. When you stop laughing, you kiss her again. Calmer this time. Before you let go, she bites your lip, tugging lightly, and making you gasp before letting go.

"Come on, go change." She commands, pushing you lightly. You smile because she keeps her grip against your blouse as she tells you to leave.

"It is you who are keeping me here, Maximoff." You tease with a smile. Wanda smiles too, and steals a kiss from you before letting go. You stumble backwards out of the room, grinning like an idiot, but you don't care, because Wanda looks at you just the same.

//-//

Wanda looked stunning in her party dress. You wanted to kiss her again, but you knew that if you did you would smear her lipstick, and she would have a lot of inconvenient questions ahead of her. So you just smiled, and breathlessly confessed how beautiful she looked, enjoying her flushed cheeks.

By the time you joined the party, the guests were arranging themselves at the correct places, and you joined a conversation circle with Wanda at your side, greeting a few more people. 

As the sun set, Erik and Charles signaled that the ceremony was about to begin.

//-//

It was all very beautiful. 

Maybe you cried between one confession and another, but everyone was emotional, so no one really cared.

Your cell phone had lots of pictures on it when you came back to the house, after saying goodbye to the guests who left when the party was over. You were holding Tommy by the hand, while Billy went with his mother, and the boys looked very tired.

"Let's go to bed, okay?" Wanda warned the kids as they followed her upstairs.

Erik wanted to open a bottle of wine, so after the kids were in bed, all the adults were outside on the balcony. Wanda sat very close to you, and you resisted the urge to put your arm around her.

"I guess I'll never get used to parties." Erik then comments, smiling nostalgically, making the group smile.

"I hope you're looking forward to the twenty-year anniversary one, papa." Pietro humorously retorts, and Erik laughs, looking at his husband tenderly.

"I look forward to it."

You smiled at the passionate way the couple looked at each other. You wondered what it must be like to stay married for so long. 

"I know we are all tired, but I had something to tell you." Erik then says, exchanging a look with Charles before continuing. "It's about the farm."

"What about the farm?" Pietro asked curiously.

"It 's yours."

Pietro frowns in confusion, looking at Wanda, who has the same look on her face.

"Papa, what?" Wanda asks, and Erik lets out a short laugh.

"You know I've always wanted to remodel this place, ever since you were kids." He recounts. "And Charles and I finally did it. But now we're old. And you two have your whole lives ahead of you, and well, you are our family. So Charles and I agreed that the house should belong to you both."

Wanda and Pietro exchange incredulous laughter.

"Papa, what? Are you sure?" Wanda asks looking from her brother to her father and stepfather. The older men just smile and the next moment they are hugging their children. You and Monica exchange looks of amusement. 

"So, does this mean we're moving?" Monica comments once everyone is seated, and elicits a giggle from the group.

"Let's save all this serious talk for tomorrow, shall we?" Erik asks with a smile. "Today, let's just enjoy the stars."

"Someone is feeling romantic." Charles jokes making the group laugh. 

"Papa, tell us some of your stories." Pietro asked with a smile, and Erik sighed, taking on a thoughtful expression.

"Um, let's see." He begins. "Have I ever told you about what happened in Budapest...?"

//-//

It was quite late when you and Wanda were finally alone, after Charles and Erik came in, you stayed talking to Pietro and Monica for a few more minutes, until they walked in as well.

You smiled at Wanda as she leaned back in her armchair to face you cross-legged, and you mimicked her position.

"Hey." She called out to you with a smile. 

"Hey."

"Did you enjoy the party?"

"Yes." You assured her tenderly. "It was pretty good actually."

Wanda nodded slightly, her gaze falling momentarily to your lips.

"Can I ask you something?"

"You can ask me anything you want, Wanda." You retort, making her smile.

The redhead looks intently at you.

"Did you mean it?" She asks and you blink in confusion. "About moving in with me."

You feel your cheeks heat up, but you smile.

"You're not even going to ask me out first, eh?"

Wanda laughed, looking away with flushed cheeks. You swallowed dryly, lifting your hand to turn her face toward you again, stroking her cheek lightly. God, Wanda was beautiful. Her bright green eyes looking back at you, the way her hair fell around her face, every part of her. 

"Don't you think we're happening too fast?" Wanda asks insecurely, you don't put your hand down, enjoying the feeling of her skin. 

"It depends." You answer letting your gaze wander to her, your free hand searching for hers in your lap, twining your fingers together.

"On what?"

"If you care about me..." You whisper as you bring your faces closer together, stopping when your lips are almost touching, and you and Wanda both close your eyes in anticipation. " As much as I care about you."

You kiss Wanda before she responds. Sweetly and softly. The sensation makes you smile against her lips, and you ignore the urge to deepen the kiss to pull away.

"Is that your way of saying you're in love with me?" Wanda teases half breathlessly a minute later, her tone playful and confident, but her rosy cheeks give away how affected she is. You think she's irresistible.

You laugh lightly, brushing a strand of hair from her face before looking into her eyes.

"I'm in love with you." You confess simply, watching her blink in surprise and amazement. "So, you still think it's too fast?"

Wanda smiles, denying it, and then approaches you.

"I'm in love with you too" She confesses as a secret against your lips. You feel your stomach rumble with nervousness and excitement, but you don't say anything else, because Wanda kisses you again. She asks for passage with her tongue a second later, making you sigh.

You hold your mouths together in a passionate kiss for long minutes, panting against each other' lips as Wanda moves to sit on your lap with her hands on your neck while your hands move up to her waist. You feel hot and bothered, squeezing her skin as if you want to merge with it. It is only when your kisses begin to move down to her collarbone that Wanda gasps saying that you two should go upstairs.

She moves off your lap, breaking the kiss, and you bite your lips, chasing her mouth again. Standing up, Wanda slides her tongue against yours one last time, making your head spin, before she pulls away, smiling at you as she pulls you by the hand into the house.

She signals with her finger for you to be quiet as you enter, and you swallow dryly as you observe the way her eyes are dark.

Getting to your room seems to take forever, especially since you can barely breathe, but finally you arrive.

Wanda locks the door after you enter. And then the atmosphere changes, because you both know what is about to happen.

She smiles shyly at you and you hold out your hand to her, leading her to sit on the bed beside you.

You exchange a glance before you sigh softly, slowly moving closer to her face. When you kiss her, much more tenderly and gently than any other time, Wanda melts.

She raises her hands to your neck, deepening the kiss as she falls onto the bed and takes you with her. You kiss her firmly, swirling your tongue around hers slowly, making her shiver. 

There is no rush in what you are about to do, and you certainly want to enjoy every second of it.

You rest your weight against Wanda, enjoying the feeling of having her beneath you, and the sound that escapes her throat. Your mouth separates from hers only for you to move your kisses down her collarbone, causing Wanda to close her eyes and sigh.

Your hands reach behind her back to pull down the zipper of her dress. When your fingers make contact with her exposed skin, Wanda bites her lips, entwining her legs together in search of more friction.

Your kisses move down as you pull the dress off her body, Wanda shifting on the bed to help you undress her. You move away from her neck to remove the piece completely, your gaze falling to her exposed skin the next moment. The redhead blushes at your stare, but all you can do is admire. The sight of her bare breasts makes your core throb, and you feel the urge to touch and kiss every inch.

You kiss her again in the next second, but part your mouths again quickly to move your lips down her body.

At the first touch on her breasts, Wanda gasps loudly. You smile, controlling the urge to tell her not to be so loud, but you are distracted by the growing heat in your core when you suck on her nipple and she whimpers, bringing her hand to your hair to keep you there.

Dividing your attention between the nipples, you kiss, bite, and suck the sensitive skin, keeping enough of it in your mouth for the skin to be marked red, which elicits a hearty moan from Wanda.

As your kisses begin to descend again, Wanda's body tenses. You kiss at the height of her navel before looking up, and already find her looking up at you with darkened eyes, biting her lip.

"Everything okay?" You ask in a sigh, trying to reason properly out of the bubble of lust. 

Wanda's hesitation causes you to raise your face back toward her again, keeping your hands by her side so as not to fall against her body.

"What's wrong?" You ask gently, trying to find any sign of discomfort. 

"Nothing." She says with a shy smile. "It's just... it's the first time I... since..."

"Yeah, I know." You interrupt half breathlessly, knowing exactly what she is referring to. "Mine too." You confess, but at this point, you knew she should have guessed it too. You have been grieving partners for quite some time, after all. "Do you want to stop?"

"No." Wanda quickly denies, biting back a smile. "I feel good."

You smile, nodding in agreement.

"Me too." 

You kiss Wanda gently again, but before the kiss gets more heated, you pull away to whisper against her lips. "Let me know if you feel uncomfortable at any time."

Wanda nods, bringing your lips together next.

//-//

When you awake, it is probably the best sleep you have had in months. Wanda is curled up on you, her clothes spread across the room lit by the sunbeams from the window.

You mumble that you have to get up because the children will be up soon, but Wanda says that her father will take care of them, and kisses you until you completely forget where you are.

When you finally get up, and go downstairs for coffee, neither adult comments at all on the way Wanda's hand remains in yours throughout the meal.

//-//

While Wanda is talking to Pietro and Erik about how they are going to organize the inheritance of the farm, and the children are playing in the backyard in front of the veranda, you decide to call your mother.

You end up learning that she got a buyer for your apartment, but you tell her that you would deal with these matters when you get back. After checking email and that sort of thing, you turn off your cell phone again.

Taking one last look at the children, you walked back into the house, catching a small piece of the conversation of the others in the living room about what would be done about Wanda's flower shop, but you didn't intrude. 

"We know a lot of people around here, Wanda." Charles was counting. "I'm sure we'll be able to find a new location for the flower shop."

Wanda looked slightly apprehensive, probably considering all the consequences of the relocation, but she relaxed her posture completely when you entwined your hand with hers.

When the conversation was over, it was decided that the families would move to the farm. Selling the properties in New York would take some time, but they would still move to the city during the vacations. It was going to be a rush, but Erik and Charles were willing to help too.

Since you guys were leaving that afternoon, you went back to your room to pack. And Wanda joined you a moment later, kissing you on the cheek before sitting down on your bed.

" All good?" You asked as you folded your socks.

"Yeah." She confirmed with a smile. "I'm just trying to believe that all this is really happening."

"It's not every day we get a farm, is it?" You joke making her laugh. Wanda bites her lips next, looking at you fondly, and you look away to your bag, feeling your face heat up.

"I forgot to ask you something yesterday." She begins somewhat shyly. You frown slightly, muttering for her to ask. "Are we dating?"

You laugh in surprise, throwing your folded party clothes into your suitcase, before approaching Wanda, raising your hand to her chin.

"What do you think, love?" You ask against her lips, dragging your mouth down her jaw to the height of her ear. "After what you did with your tongue yesterday, you're not going anywhere."

Wanda gasps, clenching her hands in the bed. You smile because you know the memories have hit her all over again. But you turn away next, smiling innocently at the woman in front of you before turning your attention back to the suitcase.

"I don't get a ring?" She teased next, making you laugh briefly. You looked back at the door before advancing against her, kissing her firmly, completely overturning her confident posture. When Wanda sighed against your mouth, you pulled away, and she grumbled, her hand reaching up to grab your belt and pull you back to her, but noises of footsteps made her give up.

Soon the boys came running into the room, talking excitedly about living on the farm and riding every day, and you wanted to laugh at the way Wanda had to disguise how affected she felt by your small make out session to answer her sons' questions.

//-//

After saying goodbye to your hosts with hugs, you sat in the back seat with the boys, because Tommy insisted that he wanted to show you a video game. Wanda drove you to your apartment, and after getting your suitcase from the trunk, you waved goodbye to the boys, and approached the driver's window.

"I'll call you, okay?" You tell her with a smile, Wanda nods, and you kiss her. Tommy and Billy make disgusted noises in the back of the car, and you and Wanda laugh as you part.

Waving to everyone in farewell one last time, you wait for Wanda to leave with the car before you go into the house.

"Kissing girls on the doorstep, heh? Looks like high school all over again." Your mother teases from the kitchen just as you enter. You laugh as you close the door.

"Spying through the kitchen window, Mom? And I thought I was a grown-up." You retort in the same tone as you walk to the kitchen to greet her with a kiss on the forehead, tossing your suitcase on the counter afterwards.

"Are you really dating then?" Your mother asks and you murmur in agreement. She smiles. "I'm so happy, honey. I can't wait to prepare for the wedding."

You roll your eyes humorously, picking up an apple from the countertop.

"We need to talk about your apartment, by the way." She starts again, looking through her briefcase for something. "I've found buyers, and well, I'm already looking at some houses for you, too." She says as you take a seat next to her at the table. "Of course I love having you here, but we both know you can't wait to have a place of your own again."

You sigh lightly.

"Yeah, Mom." You confirm. "About that..."

//-//

"You're late." Agatha remarked as soon as you stumbled into her office. You gave her a lopsided smile, closing the door as you entered.

"Sorry, I had a date and lost track of time."

Agatha raises her eyebrows at you.

"A date, hm? Let's talk about it then."

//-//

You had just deposited Melina's share of the apartment in the bank when your cell phone vibrated.

A message from Bucky, asking if you were coming to therapy with him today, as he was already at the station. You reply with an emoji, and a text saying coming.

//-//

"I am immensely happy for your progress, even though I am upset that you will not be continuing with us." Stephen says to you and Wanda, in your last group session.

"Well, New Jersey has its support groups. But this one is always going to be special." You tell him as you lightly tap his arm. Stephen smiles as he hands you the progress brooches. Wanda has her hand intertwined in yours, and the man in front of you looks at that before commenting.

"You know, I always find it curious the way pairs develop in the group." He comments. "We never ask that the activities be romantic, but still, many of them end up falling in love."

You and Wanda exchange a mixed look of embarrassment and happiness.

"I guess we have you to thank for that." Wanda says next, but Stephen smiles, denying it.

"Not at all. I'm happy for both of you. After all, I always thought you would get along together." He hints last, making you and Wanda laugh softly.

//-//

"I just need to lock up and grab a few last things in the office, and then we can go." Wanda told you when you arrived at the flower shop. The establishment was now empty, as the moving crew had already passed by.

You waited for her in the reception area.

With the key to the flower shop in hand and the last files that were there, Wanda hesitated. You looked at her, standing in the center of the place, eyes watering, and smiled as you approached.

"Everything okay?" You asked as you touched her arms, stroking her to calm her down.

"Yeah." She sighs, looking around one last time before looking back at you. "It just feels like I'm ending something. Like a chapter in my life."

You swallow dryly briefly, nodding.

"Are you scared?"

Wanda smiles.

"Terrified." She confesses. "But I have you, so I know I'll be all right."

You smile, lifting your hands to your neck to kiss her. It's brief and sweet, and it's exactly what you both need to be sure you're doing the right thing.

 "You're a flirt, aren't you Maximoff?" You tease with a smile, and Wanda giggles lightly against your lips.

"And you are breathtaking, love."

You felt your face heat up, kissing Wanda again.

"Are you sure about what we're doing, Wanda?" You let the words escape your anxious brain next. Wanda raised her free hand to your face, caressing your cheek.

" Absolute." She assures. "You are my future."

You swallow dryly, affected by the intensity of the confession. A shy smile escapes your lips in the next moment.

"And you are mine."

[breakyeol]

buzzed

drabble

┗ pairing: baekhyun x reader

warnings: pain :’)

a/n; I’m hurting. you’re hurting. we’re all hurting. this is how I cope. this is also cheesy and gross but I’m in need of a little cheesy and gross rn okay so leave me be. ALSO ik baek is doing public service so he’ll basically be home every night but FOR THE DRAMATICS let’s pretend otherwise.

“Byun Baekhyun, stay still! You’re going to make me mess up!”

“I– I’ve changed my mind! I’m not doing this!” Panic laces his voice as he lurches upwards, desperate to get away from the threatening buzz of the electric razor.

“You have to!” You hiss, grabbing his shoulders and shoving him back into the chair.

His hands fly to his head, protectively covering his head of full brown hair. “I can’t!” He shrieks, staring at you wide eyed through the mirror in front of him.

“You don’t have a choice!”

“But I—”

“No buts! I am shaving your head and that’s final.” You pause, before cocking a mischievous brow. “Unless you’d like me to go get Sehun? I’m sure he’d be just ecstatic to take a razor to your pretty little head.”

Baekhyun grimaces at the mere thought of it, a shiver of fear rippling down his spine at the thought of what kind of damage the maknae would do to his poor hair.

“Fine,” he huffs, defeated, slumping back into the chair, “just… just get it over with.”

A triumphant smile tugs at the corners of your lips, and you flick the on switch of the sleek black razor which buzzes to life in your palm. Baekhyun swallows thickly at the horrible sound, hands gripping the armrests so tightly that his knuckles turn white. He takes a sharp breath when the clippers finally make contact, squeezing his eyes shut as tightly as he can

You work in silence, carefully maneuvering the razor over his head. With each diligent stroke, more and more his thick hair falls, some into his lap, most onto the floor. The tension occupying his body is visible in his stiff, raised shoulders and the incessant bouncing of his legs. Your free hand drops, laying reassuringly across the juncture of his neck as your thumb traces light circles into his warm skin. It seems to help a bit. His legs stop bouncing.

It didn’t take very long. You should’ve expected as much, but it still took you by surprise just how easy it was.

Slowly, you flick off the razor, the room falling silent without its relentless hum.

“Done.” You finally speak, voice was little more than a whisper. Any louder and you’re certain it would shatter like glass in your throat.

Baekhyun doesn’t open his eyes, nor does he release his vice-like grip on the armrests.

“It’s looks horrible… doesn’t it?”

You glance at him in surprise, before sighing. Making your way in front of him, you lean over, placing your hands gently on top of his. Baekhyun flinches slightly at the contact, his head tipping up instinctively.

“Byun Baekhyun,” you hum softly, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss between his furrowed brows. He exhaled a shaky breath, umber eyes fluttering open to find yours as you drew away, look down at him with nothing but the warmest of affections.

“You couldn’t look horrible if you tried.”

A shy blush rose to his cheeks, and you couldn’t help the smile that broke out across your lips.

“Now, tell me what you think.” You chirped, swinging around to stand behind him once more so that he could see himself in the mirror.

“Oh god. I do look weird, you liar.” He whined, running his fingers through the what little remained of his hair, a familiar pout down turning the corners of his lips.

Your jaw dropped in disbelief. “You do not.”

“I do.” He insisted, face twisted in distaste.

“You don’t!”

“I do!”

“Okay, yeah, you look a little weird.”

“Yah!”

“Kidding, kidding.” You giggled, dodging his hand as he took a swat at your arm. Huffing, he attempted to shrug you off as you wrapped your arms around his, chest, but you only held on tighter, laughing lightly while he squirmed and kicked up a fuss.

After a bit of playful wrestling, he finally relaxed into your embrace, eyes fixed on his reflection in the mirror. It feels strange seeing himself like this. It makes everything feel way more… real. Enlistment had always been something to worry about in the future. But, now it was actually happening. He had a goddamn buzz cut and within a number of hours he’d be heading off to the training center. Talk about getting backhanded, curb stomped, and kicked in the balls by reality.

“You’ll wait for me?”

The question was unexpected. You cocked a brow, pressing your cheek to the top of his head, the unfamiliar pickling of his freshly buzzed hair rough against your skin.

“Why do you say that like it’s even a question?”

He hesitates. “I just— I know two years is going to feel like a long time. And I know it sounds selfish but I— I don’t think I could take it if you didn’t. I want you to wait for me. Please… wait for me.”

“Two years?” You scoff, propping your chin on his shoulder as you grin at him impishly through the mirror in a way that you hope hides the painful aching of your heart. “Two years is nothing. Two years is going to fly by in the blink of an eye.”

He giggles as you press a playful kiss to his sensitive neck, shoulder jerking at the ticklish sensation.

“For you,” you continue, voice suddenly softening, “two years is worth the wait.”

Baekhyun presses his lips together, eyes suddenly glassy. “You mean that?”

Your heart throbs as his voice breaks.

“Of course.” The steadfast resolution in your voice has a hoarse, tearful laugh breaking from his quivering lips, his hand curling around your wrist and squeezing tightly. You feel your own eyes beginning to burn as he suddenly turns, nuzzling his face into the space just below your jaw. A shuddering breath rushes over your skin and then you feel the first splash of wetness against your shoulder. You rush to cradle the back of his head, gently caressing his warm cheek as he sobs weakly into your neck.

“Why are you crying, Baek?” You barely manage to get the question out without choking up.

“I’m gonna miss you.” He whimpers, hands fisting tightly at the fabric of your top. “I already feel like we’ve lost so much time. How am I gonna go two years without you?”

Clenching your jaw, you swallow down the lump forming in your throat and knock your forehead lightly against his. “I’m not going anywhere. And just think, when you get back, we’ll have all the time in the world to make up for what we lost.”

Baekhyun nods at your comforting words, sniffling noisily.

“Besides, you know what Junmyeon says.”

“Oh god please don’t—” he groans, hands flying to cover his face, already sensing what was coming.

“If you’re happy to wait…” you lean in close to his ear, whispering as airily as you can, “then it’s love.”

“Don’t speak to me ever again.”

You bark out a laugh, taking an immense about of pleasure in the way he glowers at you in disgust. But honestly, you were just glad he wasn’t crying anymore.

“They are wise words spoken by a wise man.” You wink, smiling at him cheekily.

“How about I shove my wise foot up your wise—”

“Hyung!” Both of your heads whip in the direction of the door, surprised to find Sehun peeking his head in, “are you guys done y—” his jaw drops when his eyes land on Baekhyun.

“Oh my god you’re bald.”

The older boy hissed, pointing an accusing finger in his direction. “I’m not bald! It’s just a buzz cut! There’s a difference!”

“Yeah, not much though.”

“You brat—”

A bright smile breaks across your lips at the duo’s familiar, brotherly bickering, warmth blossoming in your chest. At least, you know some thing will never change.