#baffling and amazing to me
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#one thing that will always amaze me is how some people don't know what it means to just be quietly suicidal#yes i have wanted to kill myself most of my life i have learned to live around it#and when it's worse i have learned to indulge into the thoughts just enough to not make it real#like what do you mean you dont spend a large part of your life thinking i wish i was dead#what do you mean you dont avoid your problems by thinking its okay if it gets too bad ill kill myself#baffling and amazing to me#anyway dont fuck up your sleep schedule beyond recognition kids you'll be up at 5 am thinking#hey if this was my last week at least it was an interesting one#and dont worry about me ill be fine im always fine just letting the thoughts out#im gonna go try to nap a bit again#personal t
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thinking about how gyu ho was quite literally the light and love of young's life. how when they first meet, he's the one that presses that bottle to his mouth and asks if he's okay when young gets knocked down. how he travels all that way to young's apartment just to put his curtains up for him when he sees how the light bothers him when he sleeps. how he's the metaphorical ray of sunlight on young's face coming through the gap in those very curtains when he's counting all his moles.
how he's always smoothing out the crease between young's eyebrows when he's worried, like he's trying to smooth away his troubles. how his acceptance of kylie is so easy and simple bc he knows that it's something that young has opened up and trusted him with. something that he's never told another soul about, and it's understandably something painful for young to be so vulnerable about. how he tells young that he's still the same person with or without kylie. everything about gyu ho is a balm. the way he soothes and reassures. the way he loves.
that scene when they're kissing in the club for the last time encapsulates the very essence of their relationship imo. young doubting and constantly asking what happens if they argue again once they're back home, and gyu ho answering him so easily and honestly with "then we'll make up!" over and over again bc it really IS that simple for him. simple in a way that it's not for young who is never able to get past the doubt and insecurity of it all.
#love in the big city#idk what this is but i just keep thinking about them and my chest keeps aching and i keep wanting to cry#i have so many thoughts about this drama that i struggle to convey bc it touched me so deeply#the ending broke me up but i also wouldn't have it any other way?? i just hope both young and gyu ho are happy in the end#it's amazing to me how we can become so close to someone and then they can drift out of our lives like it's nothing#i've experienced it myself with so many of my own relationships and yet it still baffles me when i see it happen all the same#text#litbc
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spop stans: og she-ra’s outfit was so revealing even though she was supposed to be a warrior! it’s not realistic or practical
meanwhile, the extremely protective battle armors in spop:
bonus:
(apparently the horde had prom dresses but not protective clothing for their soldiers)
#it baffles me that she-ra is supposed to be this all powerful magical goddess but she’s easily taken down by.. electrocution?#like.. she was so vulnerable to basically everything#they really couldn’t figure out a way to make her immune to SOME of catra’s attack tactics?#oh wait but then they wouldn’t have such amazing homoerotic fights where adora almost dies every time /s#spop critical#spop salt#spop#spop discourse#spop criticism#she ra#anti spop#anti catradora#anti catra#anti c//a#antic//a#anticatradora
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have I told you all today that i love you? because I do.
thank you for letting me tell stories and have a place to be me; let me take you on journeys to cabins, hardware shops and airport first kisses. I can’t believe that I get to do what I do.
#🥹 mushy jo is in the building#I can’t get over the fact that I write things and you’re all here just like reading it#it both baffles and amazes me - and I’m just so grateful#jo’s thoughts
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do NOT have a best friend because you WILL be trying to sleep and then they will text you some of the cutest shit on earth and then you will be so busy thinking about it that sleep gets too hard >:(
#my heart is too full of love how am i supposed to sleep like this smh#have i mentioned how much i love my best friend?#because i love them#So#SO SOMUCH#they are actually the person of all time ever#the sweetest thing on the entire planet#im so exhausted been SO busy the past few days#and was SO prepared to sleep#i was like NOTHING cans top me from sleeping when i finally got to go to bed#but i was WRONG#one (1) thing can stop me from sleeping#and it’s being baffled and amazed by how much i love my absolute favorite person in the world😤#they’re crazy best friends should be illegal like what are ghey so nice and perfect and cute for
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People love ragging on Catholics on this site (fast free and easy like river water socks) but I think it’s extra funny y’all seem to think Catholics are some sort of sex prudes. Like, if a Catholic man does not give his wife an orgasm he is failing his sworn duties as a husband. I did not endure polite insinuations that my parents fucked often and well to have as many kids as they have for you to act like any self respecting Catholic is a celibate virgin. Laypeople have sex in this denomination Kaitleign. What are we, Calvinists? Jansenism is soooo 17th century Protestant Reformation-informed heresy.
#ra speaks#personal#not tagging otherwise bc tbh I can’t remember if it was formally declared a heresy or if aspects of its teachings were papally condemned#and I don’t want any um actually 🤓 people in my notes or inbox.#anyways. point is I’m sorry you’re culturally Christian USAmerican Protestant and just finding out Catholics often have mandatory sex ed#at least my school did + my grandma had an amazing little book about Catholic marriage sex tips akdjwhfjsjssj#if you’re Catholic and under the impression that fucking wasn’t supposed to be important…idk sorry your catechist didn’t ever cover like.#humanae vitae or any other encylcicles on sexuality and reproduction.#idk if it was an effort to inform/combat congregational abuse (eg. we know kids w sex ed are more likely to report/recognize abuse)#but my school was pretty damn blunt about it all. here’s a dick and all it’s anatomy. here’s a vagina and all it’s anatomy.#fucking and touching is supposed to be between a married man and woman (as expected)#but it’s also supposed to be fun and shouldn’t hurt and if it’s not and does hurt you need to communicate w them or reach out to a doctor#like. this was early 2010s im still fucking baffled my parochial school Franciscan nuns gave us a better grasp of sex ed than my high schoo#public school sex ed. the teacher there justified emotional abuse and manipulation if it’s against a guy.#and it’s not like their queer sex ed existed beyond ‘and this can be between two people of any gender’ clauses#anyways. you know me have fun and be safe im just tickled to see ppl think their experiences and expectations are universal.
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#wdym i have 1.9k followers#i'm still baffled by the amount of interactions my posts get#i've only been on here for a few months#truly grateful#ig always makes me feel dejected and disinterested#but posting here has been truly a joy#and having so many amazing and talented mutuals
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The hardest part of trying to turn your creative passions into a thing that pays the bills is not worrying if people will hate it.
It's worrying if they will care, and if they do...will it be enough to put money down. Will you be comfortable asking them to?
Unless you 'get lucky' and someone with influence and a massive following happens to see what you're doing and draw attention to you. Or you are someone with a massive following already...
You're unlikely to see much in the way of numbers. Even with a publishing company doing much of the heavy lifting, it takes more than screaming from the rooftops and inundating websites with ads for people to care.
They need their friends to care. They need someone they trust to tell them to look at this thing. Or enough strangers looking at it that they feel left out.
This isn't doom-saying here, this is my attempt to make you appreciate the people who do care. Who do buy your things, leave reviews, comments, tell their friends about how awesome they think what your doing is.
It is hard to put yourself out there, more so to do it alone. The constant focus on bigger and bigger numbers isn't helping anyone. Yes, there are bills to pay, and yes you will need to do something else to pay them because creative mediums rarely do.
But if you hope to keep loving it, to not fall into the money pit of despair:
You need to love your fans too, whether you have one or one million.
#rambles#why yes i did get extra sad about a thing and have to talk my way out of it how did you guess#i love every single one of you who gives my disturbed little words the time of day#the idea you'd pay money for it astonishes me#the adorable cheerleader who keeps telling everyone about me frequently makes me think i've slipped into some sort of dreamscape#it baffles me to even have anything resembling a 'fan'#and feels trite to tell others to appreciate when they have them#but you should#because they don't have to care#and they do#and that's kind of amazing#thems the queues
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Okay so Twinkle Kuuchuusen is AMAZING (as expected and I will try to gather my thoughts about it later), but THE SOLOS OH MY GOD THE SOLOS AND THE LYRICS I'M!!!
They both reference 2x2 a lot, and you can see their development so much from their previous solos! There's a big theme of acceptance and both and they're driving me crazy with it!
Hinata's '"street" being bathed in blue and how he accepts it as a part of himself before declaring he's going to light it up with colors because he'll love himself even more!!! The way he doesn't try to gloss over the negative but decides he'll stick to his positive worldview while taking everything in stride! How he knows now that no matter how far they drift their hearts will always reconnect!
And Yuta walking the line between two worlds confidently, not looking back into the shadow of days past and pushing ahead into the unknown! Going all out and no longer suppressing his feelings, engraving them into his heart and making bold decisions as himself! The way he connects their worldviews with their differing light, knowing someone will always be at his back no matter what!
If there was ever any doubt within me about the future of 2wink, I feel like these solos resolved it. They really have come to a temporary truce and peace with each other, they'll stay together while continuing to push and compete in their separate ways. These songs feel like letters to each other almost, about how they're able to move forward with their own worldviews without shame, but will always hold the other close. And even if they do come to that breaking point in the future, after the dust has settled, they'll still be there watching the night sky - in a much better place than where they started.
#i have so much i could say here on god#my breath literally caught when hinata sang “I'll love myself even more” like PLEASE DO YOU DESERVE SO MUCH I'M SO PROUD OF YOU#i am so pleased with the direction they took yutas in it captures his new personality and motivation with the way he still cares so well#2wink climax was amazing but it also scared and emotionally broke me so i am so happy that the solos are what i hoped#people debate !! era writing which is reasonable but god. !! era 2wink has NEVER missed honestly they did them so well#hinata and yuta being so underrated always baffles me bc my valkaloidp ass is always so ready to dissect and appreciate them#2-3rd fav unit they are so good i need the fandom to appreciate them more please#my ohshc manga hitachiin roots may be showing here but damn it a well-done codependency-breaking sibling arc will always get me#enstars#ensemble stars#ensemble stars music#enstars solos#2wink#hinata aoi#yuta aoi#yuuta aoi#raelyn rambles
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aaghh I hate health anxiety ocd (or whatever you call it), it's literally doing nothing other than contributing to make my health worse
... wait actually, does anyone have like, tips/advice for that kind of thing? I really think I need some help with this one
#i (ai)#ocd#vent cw#I also have like severe decision paralysis + procrastination issues so that's great#like. being so scared that i have to choose for something to eat that is nutritious&healthy AND affordable AND eatable#that i delay my eating by many hours every other day (+ combined with many other reasons like general awful schedule)#is not in fact the amazing health plan my instincts apparently think it is for some baffling reason. fucking hell#I consistently have all sorts of digestive system issues and I'm plenty underweight. tbh my adhd meds prob also dont help with this part#....on that note I have severe anxiety with spending money (which I have very little of) too. lmao. just great#during the lockdown years my contamination ocd spiked very badly and it still hadn't fully recovered now#and it was/is really godawful harmful for my physical and mental health alike. like this was worse before but even now it really screws wit#my hydration habits. also its always my top consideration/anxiety to think about 'god would the toilet hygiene be bad'#whenever theres any option for me to go anywhere. so I avoided nearly every possible activity/event/social event I could avoid#that require leaving home for half a day or more. and I freak out badly whenever anyone comes to our home to visit for fear of contaminatio#some family friends used to send kids over to our place for dinner montly-ish & that was always my worst anxiety source for the month#I always dreaded the night terribly and it was awful experience. urgh.#gdi I wish I had less types of ocds like why am I cursed with so many annoying things at once lmao#...anyway ugh. i hate how my parents is about me getting sick/ill/any sort of pains etc. always jump to blame me at once#now I don't even want to tell them about it but I have to and they'll often force me to do chores as usual and/or never stop talking about#how it's so totally my fault for having awful schedules and bad habits etc that I'm sick & that I'm making excuses or whatever the fuck#that i'm an adult its my responsibility etc etc#anyway sorry and thank you if you've read this far lmao
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with how the splat 3 fanbase is acting about splatfests, you'd think there's something real and tangible on the line and not like, superficial bragging rights and a few extra snails. idk why people are sitting here and getting angry at shiver as if she's a real person who has any actual will to do anything and not just pixels on a screen, especially when there are legitimate issues with how splatfests are designed and run in splat3, and that's the devs and nintendo's fault, not shiver. she's not real and she can't do anything to you. and i've seen way more complaining about the concept of "toxic shiver stans who always pick shiver and ruin it for everyone" than i have any actual evidence that these kind of people exist on a mass scale. it really feels like that kind of person is a guy that the fanbase made up to be mad at every time they lose. i agree that there are huge problems with splat 3 but the moment someone lays the blame on shiver they throw all credibility out the window. it's not shiver, there's no evil cult of shiver stans manipulating the splatfests, and don't get me started on how people are talking about the asian playerbase with these splatfests.
#luminiscore#splatfest#splatoon 3#listen guys. ive been playing since splat 1. and let me tell you. even then it wasn't as bad as this#*old man voice* back in my day callie won almost every splatfest and we liked that JUST FINE. ok we didn't#but judging from numbers of past splatfests majority of the player base DOES pick based on what they like best and not the idol#so idk why im seeing people call for idols to be dettached from splatfest thats not gonna change the issues with balance#like i hate to break it to you all but majority of the splatoon player base are casuals who are not deep in the fandom if at all#and they do not care about what your ideas of fairness are. they just wanna play#and its stuff like. i think a lot of you seriously underestimate how popular stuff like vanilla ice cream is. it's not shiver#im just amazed and baffled by all the hatred and vitriol directed at shiver bc ive never seen this before with splatfest discourse#the WAHHH (insert winning team here) IS FULL OF EVIL SPAWN CAMPERS excuse is as old as time and should not be listened to. sorry#and in no world in a pvp game will the enemy roll over and let you win and play “fair” bc you want them to. thats not how it works#and i despise how whinging and screaming from a small and super toxic section of the fandom is poisoning discourse for casuals#touching grass isn't enough some of you guys need to start a garden
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v funny to me that Can Bake and Can Cook are opposite types of guys but I love that we have one of each in my household. drift compatible <3
#my bf is an AMAZING cook like he can just chuck whatever on a pan and have it come out great#he can taste any dish or sauce or premade junk and know exactly what its missing to make it better#he also one time made the worat brownies ive ever had in in my life#and when i was like what recipe did you use?? he said. and i quote. 'recipe ?'#he was astonished when i made yorkshire pudding from a box and they came out Correct#he was like 'what did you do mine always collapse??'#and i said 'i did the things the box told me to do in the order they said to do it and nothing else' and he was baffled#molly speaks
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Shoutout to Elden Ring DLC for making me be good at Malenia that I 2 try her after a year of not playing and never having beaten her because I forgor
I didn't even use a different weapon and didn't level it's necessary stats up much either (i went for 60vigor and spread out the rest) but now just using my trusty poleblade
yeah pretty easy in comparison
#txts#i am still BAFFLED#elden ring was my first fromsoft game btw#and i tried malenia and got her to phase two easy but usually died before beating her even tho i got close#had to take a break bc exhausted and then only came back way later bc i forgot and other stuff took my time#but now.....#i fought her as a distraction and needed win from consort radahn#i am proud of myself but also just amazed#she is so slow and simple and FAIR in comparison to some of the enemies encountered#her normal attacks dont drain half my health bar#this....this is kindness truly#elden ring#sote#mind you her lil ducky dance is still foul BUT A: surviveable and B: escapable#dont ask me how#instincts kicked in#and no frame jitter like w/ radahns time slices or whatever they are#now...to beat him....without shield+lance strat#i dont enjoy playing shield strats#and this isnt a meme run
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lestat is the funniest fucking guy ever. my man makes a big deal out of how it’s totally fine if they fuck other people then has a mental breakdown when Louis hooks up with someone??? I don’t think this man particularly enjoys the consequences to his own actions, or at least doesn’t expect them because he just goes :0 everytime an extremely predictable outcome happens
#chia rambles#iwtv#oh man I’m just gonna insult Louis brother at dinner (Louis stops meeting him) hey what the fuck not cool#amazing this guy has such insane levels of delusion but somehow he’s also the funniest guy in the room#(Louis makes a decision) NOOOOOO BABYGIRL NOT THATTTT (throws a tantrum)#I wanna see Louis make all the guys fucking around find out#me whenever Louis is petty: YAYYYYYYY#iwtv lestat#he operates on levels of baffling self delusion few have ever reached
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What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)
"Jane, did you ever stop to think that... if anything happened to me, I mean anything bad, there wouldn't be any money for you? I wouldn't be here to sign the checks. You wouldn't even have pocket money. Did you ever think of that?"
"Yeah, I've thought about that."
#what ever happened to baby jane?#american cinema#robert aldrich#1962#joan crawford#bette davis#lukas heller#henry farrell#victor buono#wesley addy#bert freed#maidie norman#anna lee#marjorie bennett#anne barton#dave willock#robert cornthwaite#barbara merrill#julie allred#gina gillespie#frank de vol#revisiting after a long long time. watching this as a teen (too many moons ago) it was Joan that bewitched me; i was deeply taken by her‚#fell a little in love even. coming back to it now and I'm baffled how i slept on Bette's performance‚ arguably the showier and more#rewarding (from an actors pov). she's ott and grotesque but there's real depth to the role too‚ she delivers with nuance and there's levels#to the character‚ tragedy too (the completely unexpected way she says the line 'You mean all this time we could have been friends?' is#beautiful). also Buono?? I'd honestly kind of forgotten that there was anyone else in this film but Bette and Joan but my god‚ in his first#major film role‚ he's amazing! and funny! easy to forget just how funny this film is‚ in amongst the horror and the sadness and the waste#of it all. beautiful little film‚ i know it has its followers and is appreciated as a high camp classic‚ but it's honestly so much more#than just that too. Aldrich (truly one of The great genre directors) does wonders with sharp‚ unforgiving black and white photography#(beautifully contrasted with the soft warmer footage of younger J and B from their hollywood heyday). masterfully constructed too
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@basilthymee They’re arguing again :)
#splynter art#splynter doodles#rain world#rain world downpour#iterator OC#fanart#two fibers intertwined#I actually remember seeing these two before#absolutely amazing concept oh my god#been meaning to draw them anyways#Seer would be absolutely baffled (as usual) from hearing two iterator voices in one can#you attack me you get attacked back#with fanart#rargawrarhawrgargarg
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