#bad messages

[clairedelune-13]

One of the most insulting things about this show is their treatment of Eskel.

Eskel is a great example of a man with disfigured face (allegory for disability) who’s an honest-to-god good person. Actually, aside from Geralt, one of the few level-headed, peaceful Witchers. Proof that just cuz you’re disabled/disfigure, doesn’t mean you’re a monster.

And the show made him into an asshole. Then later, a mutated leshen. A monster.

Sidenote: I’ve been disabled since I was 6 months old, and people who don’t know me treat me different except when they get to know me.

Ciri, upon first meeting Eskel is scared cuz of his face scars but then he speaks and her fear is gone.

Netflix basically teaches that: disabled = monster.

And that’s seriously fucked up.

[destinygoldenstar]

Dhar Mann Thinks ADHD People Are Stupid (They’re NOT Stupid)

So, a grown adult has ADHD. This is described by Dhar Mann as ‘childish and stupid’.

That’s an accusation that gets thrown around a lot by people. It’s not what ADHD is at all. 

ADHD is when people have a fixation on activity to stim their brains. They have a hard time paying attention, and they are quite impulsive.

Not once does that say that ANYONE with ADHD is automatically stupid. It just says they learn differently.

Now, in this video, Dhar Mann kinda seemed to try to please me by saying that ‘you don’t have to prove anything to anyone’. Which is true.

But that does leave me to show how he can’t prove that he knows how to write ADHD in a way that isn’t offensive or downright SHAMING people with it.

In the video: “Adult must go back to 5th grade”, there’s a man with ADHD, who is incredibly childish and acts like a toddler. He’s into ‘childish’ stuff, and he is, as the most defining character trait, stupid.

A boss at work calls him stupid, so he sends this man back to the 5th grade to prove that he is not stupid.

And because he’s an adult, EVERYONE looks down on him and calls him stupid. The kids call him stupid. The TEACHER calls him stupid. And even a random janitor calls him stupid and that he’s not even worth being a janitor himself.

“You don’t have to worry about this job. I passed the fifth grade.”

In the Dhar Mann universe, being a janitor is the ultimate low life. 

And guess what? The man with ADHD is actually portrayed as stupid. Stupid enough that he can’t pass a fifth grade test. Oh well I guess everyone was right about him.

Nobody calls them out anyway, as what would otherwise be a good message is essentially telling ADHD kids to just... give up. Give up on trying to be successful. 

‘You don’t have to prove anything to anyone’ becomes ‘You have nothing to prove. You have nothing to offer.’

And for the ADHD people who WANT to succeed? Yeah that’s very inconsiderate. 

Now, yes, in this video, they actually DO portray a way that people can learn in a different way. It’s the whole climax of the video that this grown man wins over kids in a game. He wins, so you think my point is invalidated, right?

No. He ended up not wanting to pass anyway, so clearly success wasn’t the message. It still stereotypes that ADHD people are only good for one thing. That’s that they can never grow up, fit into the adult mold, and come up with anything that isn’t childish. They are good for a kid’s play partner, and nothing else.

Again, ADHD people do not always act like children. They are not always children. The only thing that makes a child a child is their age. Factually. People with ADHD struggle a lot in school and work, and need to find their own routes to success. I can appreciate the effort Dhar Mann is trying to make with explaining that people with disabilities can find other ways to succeed in life. 

However, to explain something, you gotta understand something. I personally think this is bad ADHD representation.

[thebiggamehunter]

New Post has been published on Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter's Blog

New Post has been published on http://blog.thebiggamehunter.us/the-voice-in-your-head-the-no-bs-coaching-advice-podcast/

The Voice in Your Head | The No BS Coaching Advice Podcast

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Watch on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWCrccg_U-k

There is a voice in my head and in other people’s heads that claims to be looking out for us. It’s strategy doesn’t work.

Summary

Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter is a coach who worked in recruiting for what seems like one hundred years. He is the head coach for JobSearchCoachingHQ.com and NoBSCoachingAdvice.com. He is the host of “The No BS Coaching Advice Podcast,” “No BS Job Search Advice,” and “Job Search Radio.”

Are you interested in my coaching you?  Email me at JeffAltman@TheBigGameHunter.us and put the word, “Coaching” in the subject line.

Subscribe to the “No BS Coaching Advice” podcast.

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For more No BS Coaching Advice & encouragement, visit my website.

[koishua-archive]

Tell the truth. You actually hate Keith.

[perfume-and-entropy]

Wherein the care and feeding of the Elder Gods is discussed.

[thenonrightsofmen]

Miss Piggy: The unofficial mascot of the feminist movement and possibly the most abusive girlfriend ever. 

 Miss Piggy and friends have been entertaining children for a very long time. In June of this year Miss Piggy has been awarded with The Sackler Center First Awards, a award that is presented by feminists to women who have been the first in their field. The people presenting the award gave much praise to Miss Piggy for all she has done through her career including that time in 1979 in which Miss Piggy showed heroism, saving her beau Kermit from bad guys in “The Muppet Movie.” Sure she is a hero but there is also a very dark side to miss piggy, the hero. 

 Miss Piggy by far has to be the most heinous example of female on male abuse ever in the history of fictional characters. It took a little work to find out this information and I wouldn’t doubt at all if the number is low. Miss Piggy through her career has abused Kermit the frog a whopping 1,542 times, don't pretend you have never seen Miss Piggy Karate chop Kermit. 

 Normally I would let this go due to her being a fictional character but now that she is the unofficial mascot for feminism, or at least it seems like it, compiled with the MTV appearance where Miss Piggy basically says if you are not not a feminist, or if you cat call her, she will come and get you I just have to say something. Is this really an acceptable message to be sending to anyone? 

Here is what I get from the idea of Miss Piggy and her life: You will win feminist awards if you have a successful career, abuse men, and threaten anyone who isn’t a feminist.

[alltagsleere]

i hate it when i read a bad message and suddenly i feel so hopeless that it’s hard to breath and to speak, i just can’t handle the sadness.

[athenacosplay]

The Best/Worst Okcupid profile I have ever seen + his opening message to me!

[destinygoldenstar]

How Dhar Mann Gets It Wrong About Teachers (Analyzing ‘Teachers Get Revenge On Bad Student’)

This will be quick because I’m not feeling well and I’m hard at work for the next month.

I just wanted to talk about this video solely because of a meeting I had with my own teachers, that actually went great. 

Despite my distaste for school, I actually ENVY teachers. Yeah I say there are bad teachers, but I never want you guys to think that I think all teachers are bad. In fact, some teachers are rare treasures, and they’re victims like us in the system. 

My school does some dumb things like teach kids how phones are bad (despite using a really dated site for everything.) But that’s not the teacher’s fault. Heck, even THEY think some things are wrong.

What matters is knowing your teachers as people and that they should be respected. Because the sooner you address issues with them and talk to them like friends, the healthier your experience will be.

So Dhar Mann wants to address teachers as a main subject in a video. Does he get it right about teachers?

Nope. 

Absolutely not.

Despite the title suggesting otherwise, a kid is actually a pretty smart kid and a good student. He has his life figured out pretty much, and he feels as though his teachers are unfair and preventing the kids privileges.

Yeah he hacks a girl at the beginning, but you could argue he’s attempting to teach her a lesson and a playful tease instead of being harmful. He’s not really ‘bullying’.

This video wants to teach you that everything this kid says is complete bull, and that teachers are HOLY SAINTS WHO DO EVERYTHING RIGHT, AND YOU SHOULD TREAT THEM AS SUCH

Now, Dhar Mann has written abusive teachers before. BUT, it’d have to the main subject of a video for that to be the case. Other times, the teachers are portrayed as completely comfortable with their job, know everything there is to know, and are essentially gods and goddesses.

Now, I’m not saying no teacher is comfortable with their job, however, you can’t just ignore the fact that teachers, even good ones, make mistakes. My teachers make mistakes all the time.

Basically, the beginning argument of the video brings up my very point I want to make:

Boy: “Shouldn’t we be using Javascript?”

Teacher: “Well, we’ve been using Python the whole year, so we’re gonna stick with that.”

Boy: “Yeah, but all the big companies use Java. Facebook. Netflix. Uber. Should I keep going?”

Teacher: “True, but just because they’re using a certain programming language, doesn’t make it better. In fact-”

Boy: “In fact, I feel like you should be teaching us real world applicable skills, so we can work at these companies. I mean, isn’t that the whole point of all of this?”

Teacher: “A lot of companies use Python, Kyle.”

Boy: “Yeah... I’m starting to think that you don’t even know Java.”

Teacher: “And why do you say that?”

Boy: “Well, uh, because, if you did, I don’t see why you would give up a real salaried job at a big teach company and settle for being a teacher. I mean, I feel like I could teach this class.”

Teacher: “I teach because I enjoy working with students. Not everyone has to work at Google in order to be considered successful.”

Boy: “Yeah, and I feel like your paycheck disagrees.”

Teacher: “That’s it. Principal’s Office. Now.”

So, I don’t want to say the boy is in the right to say all of this stuff. He’s not. He’s being rude and inconsiderate. You don’t want to argue with your teachers like this if you want a good relationship with them, even if you really want to.

First off, the complaint about using an old dated site that barely works over a website proven to work better by outside forces IS a real complaint. My school used a VERY dated site that was even LESS efficient than Python. 

(Netflix isn’t even a hacking site btw. It’s a TV platform and a company.)

Arguments on what site is better and safer to use is fair, and both sides can have reasonable POVs. (But Dhar Mann wants you to think in this vid that the old way is good, new way is bad)

Second, we’ve ALL complained that school should be teaching us world appropriate skills. I have too, as you all know. And to be fair, some classes do. 

The issue rises when he starts to insult the teacher and her life choice.

Some teachers really are just there to pay bills. Some teachers have no choices. In fact if you look up how much teachers get paid...

‘Nationwide, the average public school teacher salary for the 2019-2020 school year was $63,645 , according to data from the Department of Education's National Center for Education Statistics. ‘

Source: https://www.bing.com/ck/a?!&&p=9f8a78bb3336ee26JmltdHM9MTY2NjA1MTIwMCZpZ3VpZD0zMGVjYTQ4OC0yZjdiLTY2NzgtMzRmZC1hYmFhMmVhYjY3OTAmaW5zaWQ9NTQ3NQ&ptn=3&hsh=3&fclid=30eca488-2f7b-6678-34fd-abaa2eab6790&psq=how+much+to+teachers+get+paid&u=a1aHR0cHM6Ly9rYW5nLmNodXJjaHJlei5vcmcvaG93LW11Y2gtZG8tdGVhY2hlcnMtZ2V0LXBhaWQjOn46dGV4dD0lRUUlODAlODBIb3clMjBtdWNoJUVFJTgwJTgxJTIwbW9uZXklMjBkbyUyMCVFRSU4MCU4MHRlYWNoZXJzJUVFJTgwJTgxJTIwJUVFJTgwJTgwZ2V0JUVFJTgwJTgxJTIwJUVFJTgwJTgwcGFpZCVFRSU4MCU4MSUzRiUyME5hdGlvbndpZGUlMkMsRGVwYXJ0bWVudCUyMG9mJTIwRWR1Y2F0aW9uJTI3cyUyME5hdGlvbmFsJTIwQ2VudGVyJTIwZm9yJTIwRWR1Y2F0aW9uJTIwU3RhdGlzdGljcy4&ntb=1

Yeah, he kind of has a point. 

I can believe this teacher genuinely wants to work with students. Heck, ‘success’ really is different for everyone. But I don’t think she has a right to define success for him. That’s the ONLY bad thing she does here.

In this scene at least.

But the video wants you to believe that teachers are ALWAYS good and have a BLESSED job and are ALWAYS right. Which could’ve been meaningful, BUT, Dhar Mann fails to make it apparent that they are people and so are students. Learning is a two way relationship between the learner and the learned.

There’s this scene where all three teachers that he insulted are talking about how bad of a kid he is because, “He thinks he’s smarter than everyone else”

Yes, how dare a child be independent and smart and able to teach himself. (sarcasm)

These teachers even call this kid the WORST in this scene. Which is DISRESPECTFUL. He insulted your teaching methods and called them basic and not important for the real world. He didn’t break any rules or put anyone in danger. I think he’s not the worst student ever. Annoying, sure, not not ‘the worst of the worst.’

The ‘revenge’ of the video basically has the teachers say ‘f**k our job and the possibility we could get fired, LET’S MAKE THIS KID WHO INSULTED US ONE TIME RULE THREE CLASSES AT ONCE!’

Which, MAKES NO SENSE.

Three classes at once?! Even if you were a professional teacher, NO TEACHER goes through that, let alone at the same time, and no one should even have to worry about it!

If it was different times, I’d pass it, but they’re all at once. That’s why we have a teacher for each class brand!

This is only torture for a child, NOT RATIONAL learning.

And in the end, as I said, this is deemed as genius, and that this kid deserves the torture, and the validation that he is NOT a smart kid, that his ideas suck, and that teachers always know best. That he’s wrong for saying teachers don’t know what they’re doing, and that they always do. 

Like I said with my meeting, teachers make mistakes as well, and some are there for you. If you have an issue with your teacher, you tell them maturely, the issues. If they don’t listen, take it to the authority and file a complaint. You need to get through to them for the learning process to work. 

Now, if a student’s complaint is, “I wanna blow stuff up” “I wanna watch movies all class period” “I don’t wanna do my homework”, then by all means, they have rights to be teachers and discipline.

I’m just saying there’s a value of compromise that Dhar Mann is failing to portray with the setup. 

I get it, teachers are stressed out, teachers get a lot of garbage nowadays, but my real life experience proves that the issue isn’t ‘they don’t walk a mile in their shoes’. The issue is ‘they have different priorities that need to be seen.’

If you were to ask me how I’d have done it, I would’ve had the kid file a complaint about his teachers, start meetings with them, and in the process he learns about their lives and what they go through and why they teach. The video would be about compromise and forming relationships with the adults who put in the effort to help you, NOT, “They’re better than you, so you should always listen to them.”

Treat others the way you want to be treated. You get the same message that way.

[badonlinedaters]

If you really want to know what makes me smile, send me a copy-paste message! Especially since it’s one of the things I’ve clearly said I dislike! What could go wrong?!

Also, anytime I see someone misspell “perfect” as “prefect”, I automatically picture this:

Don’t judge me.

[thesilverword]

The Nationwide commercials where they show some upset kids dressed like grow ups and then go on about not feeling like a priority... Umm... Is that the message you want to be sending Nationwide? That kids aren't a priority & that thought is so common that you can make it the entire focus of the commercial? You want to say that the neglect of children is so commonplace that you can make a cutesy commercial about it? Not a good message.

[yankee-snickerdoodle]

Grease is(n’t) the word ! But, you should still see it because we worked incredibly hard to make it presentable !

[this-l0ve-is-a-sure-thing]

This can't be fucking true. God please!

🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫

[my-wondermad-memoirs-blog]

Yes, I agree that Disney really send some bad messages; and, yes, I'm still glad that it was part of my childhood.

About Disney

[okc2badtranslatortranslations]

Dude's 28 and still types like that - and in response to my profile, which states that I dig proper spelling and grammar. Sigh.

#actual message I received

[judayre]

Looking through Facebook, and one of my people (actually, a former student) has an image with the text "you are confined only by the walls you build yourself."  Which, don't get me wrong, it's a great idea to remind people not to limit themselves and not to narrowly define themselves.

But try to tell a Black woman who wants to be an actress that the only thing holding her back is herself.  Try to tell that to a trans person trying to get housing.  Try telling a person with a debilitating illness that the only reason they can't live a "normal" life is because they're defining themselves by their illness.  Try to tell any minority trying to get out of poverty that the only thing holding them there is a wall "they built themselves."

It's a good message at heart, but it underplays and disregards the real barriers that people have to success.  It ignores the real struggles that people have to go through.  Because no.  Racial minorities are confined by white racism.  Women are confined by male sexism.  Jews and Muslims are confined by Christian anti-semitism and islamophobia.  Gay people are confined by straight homophobia.  Trans people are confined by cis transphobia.  Chronically ill people are confined by the demands of living with illness.  These are real barriers.

So in the end, what this "inspirational" message is really doing is telling people who are stereotyped, denied rights, beaten, and killed in large numbers that they are responsible for their own lack of success.  They are the only ones responsible for their own lack of success.  And that blames victims and supports the current, unequal system.