#b) because the tour here is (mostly) over

[cowboylikedean]

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[dark-fics-4-you]

Old Grudges Die Hard

dark!Bully!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Rafe Cameron had made your life hell ever since you first met him in elementary school. When you moved away for college, you thought you were finally done with your bully, but your life changes when you come face to face with him at his party a year later.

Warnings: noncon (rape), smut, unprotected sex, dacryphilia (crying & tear kink), rough sex, slapping, choking, sexual harassment, harassment, degradation, bullying, drinking, drugs

A/N: this fic begins when Reader and Rafe are in elementary school, but nothing sexual happens between them until they are 19 years old

When you were in elementary school, your parents explained to you that part of being a Pogue meant that people would hate you for absolutely no reason other than the fact that you’re poor.

Grasping your scrapped knee in pain as fat tears rolled down your cheeks, you were quick to tell your parents about the altercation at school as soon as they picked you up.

When you asked them what a ‘Pogue’ was, they exchanged a concerned look before gingerly explaining why the rude boy in your class had shoved you really hard at recess.

“B-but why would he do that?” You sobbed. “It’s so hard to make new friends here!”

“I know sweetheart,” your mother looked down at you sadly. “Is this the first time something like this has happened?”

“No! He made fun of my clothes on my first day. He said I look poor and he would know since he’s rich.” You cried louder, remembering how upset his words had made you. “A-and then all of the girls wouldn’t stop grabbing my skirt or pinching me because he told them to.”

“Have you told the teacher about this?” Your mother asked. You had reached the car now and she helped you into your seat and buckled you in.

“They just ignored me! Rafe gets away with everything,” you grumbled.

“Maybe he’s got a crush on you, Y/N,” your dad jokingly teased from the front of the car and you gagged loudly.

“Ew! No! I hate him! I would never like him in a million years!” You angrily exclaimed.

“Well, I’ll call the school and let them know he’s causing problems. He shouldn’t be able to get away with this without punishment.”

What your parents had a much harder job explaining to you was how powerful money is, and how unfair the world is.

Three parent-teacher meetings with your parents and Rafe’s accomplished little to nothing. If anything, the attention that you had brought to his behavior only made it worse.

It was remarkable how sneaky he could be in his torment of you, always waiting for the teacher’s back to turn before pinching your arm hard enough to make you scream, and bringing the teacher’s attention back to you only for you to be chastised for interrupting class.

He would accuse you of looking at his quizzes, all the while he was cheating off of you.

Any craft or art project that you worked on would mysteriously turn up damaged or missing, getting you in more trouble with the teacher for not completing work.

By the last day of 5th grade, you were thrilled to be heading off to a different middle school than Rafe.

And for three blissful years, you were safe from his cruelty. In fact, Rafe Cameron had become all but a distant memory by the time you reached high school.

Excited by your high grades in middle school and how fast you were learning the material, your parents saved up their money to put you into the best high school in Outer Banks, one that was populated mostly by rich Kooks.

You were so excited to start high school at such a nice school! It was very obvious to you that you were in Kook territory given how well funded it was, and you hoped that despite your Pogue status, you would be able to make friends.

When you realized one of your closest elementary school friends who had switched schools in the 7th grade was at the same school, you were over the moon.

Linking arms with Olivia, she gave you a quick tour of the school before leading you over to your locker. After several attempts, you opened it and loaded your things inside.

“I’ve already made so many friends and we haven’t even started classes yet!” Olivia giggled.

“Really??” You asked. If Olivia was making friends this quickly, maybe it would be okay for you.

“Yeah! And there’s sooo many cute guys here! Like Brady, Joey, Daevon, Rafe, Aaron L, Aaron R, although Aaron D is straight up fugly.”

“Wait hold on, did you say Rafe? As in Rafe Cameron?” Your stomach dropped at the thought of running into him.

Even though it had been three years and you hoped that he had changed, you couldn’t help but feel apprehension at his name.

“Oh yeah, he’s sooo cute!” Olivia gushed, looking around the hall quickly before meeting your eyes again. “Why? What’s up? Do you have a crush on him too?”

“Well, I haven’t seen him in so long, but the last time I did, he was basically my bully in elementary school,” you joked, trying to make light of the situation.

“Wait, what?? That was Rafe?!”

“What did I do?” A familiar voice from behind you made the hair on the back of your neck stand up and you swiveled around to come face to face with the last person you wanted to see right now.

His face had changed and he was obviously much taller than he had been when you last saw him (you both were), but there was no mistaking his face.

He took you in for a moment, eyes widening when he recognized you.

“No way, Y/N Y/L/N, is that really you?” His voice was incredulous and you had never wished more that you would just evaporate.

“In the flesh,” you nervously joked.

“Hi Rafe!” Olivia excitedly greeted him, but he ignored her, much to her dismay.

“Y/N um, you know…” he paused, looking a bit pained. “I uh, I feel kinda bad about how I treated you back then, that was so long ago now though.”

He laughed and you reluctantly joined in.

“But anyways, I uh- wanna make it up to you, you should come sit with my friends at lunch today.”

His offer shocked you and you couldn’t help but stare at him for a few moments with raised eyebrows.

“Is this a joke?”

“No,” he quickly responded, looking to the ground with embarrassment burning across his cheeks. “I’m just trying to be nice.”

You glanced over at Olivia who gave you an encouraging grin, looking a little jealous herself.

“Um, I guess! Thanks Rafe!” You smiled at him and he mumbled a goodbye before running off to class.

Olivia squealed with excitement before pulling you into a tight hug, “OMG!!! Y/N!! He is so into you!”

“No way! He’s probably just trying to put the past behind us,” you rolled your eyes at Olivia’s enthusiasm.

However, as lunch approached, you found butterflies growing in your stomach. Were you scared or nervous? Why?? It was just lunch. Rafe did look very different, and you couldn’t deny that he was a little cute, but you still felt anxious to see what lunch would bring.

The bell rang out, releasing you from your last class before lunch. Your stomach was in knots as you walked to the cafeteria. You grabbed your food slowly, letting people filter into the seats and trying to spot Rafe.

He confidently walked in with his friends in tow, all of them laughing loudly as they made their way to a table near the back of the cafeteria.

You swallowed your nerves, clutching your lunch tray tightly before approaching their table.

Rafe stood up, grinning at you before wrapping an arm around your shoulders and leading you to a seat before pushing you down onto it, “here, sit next to me.”

He sat beside you introducing you to all of his friends at the table, “that’s Topper, Kelce, Byce, and Joey.”

“Hi,” you nervously told the boys your name.

After meeting them, the conversation moved on to discussing all of the cool things they had done this summer. You even chimed in yourself and they all seemed interested in what you had to say.

Rafe opened his lunchbox before sighing in disappointment and chuckling, “my dumbass parents forgot the silverware again.”

He looked down at his leftover spaghetti, seemingly with no fork or spoon in sight.

Feeling like you wanted to repay Rafe for inviting you to sit with him and his friends, you told him you could grab it.

When you stood and turned to walk away, you heard the entire table break out into loud laughter.

You whipped around, nervously meeting Rafe’s eye.

“What’s so funny?” You demanded, raising your voice to cut through their snickers.

Your panic caught the attention of the students around you, who also began laughing.

“Looks like Aunt Flo is in town, Y/L/N.” Rafe cackled, and your cheeks flushed with embarrassment as you realized what was going on.

On the seat that you had just been in, beside Rafe, you could see red paint drying to the seat.

Without thinking, you reached behind and your heart clenched when you felt wetness on your bottom, and you looked down to see the same red paint now smeared on your hand.

Rafe and his friends burst into laughter, along with the other tables that had been nearby when you stood up.

The cacophony caught the attention of the other students seated further away, who noticed your seemingly blood stained shorts and started laughing along at you.

You had never felt so publicly shamed in your life, and you realized that you were dead wrong to assume that Rafe had changed at all.

You didn’t think he could ever turn over a new leaf now.

Hot tears sprang to your eyes as you ran out of the cafeteria, sprinting to a bathroom stall to lock yourself in as you cried.

After 5 minutes of ugly sobbing, you finally collected yourself and decided to go to the front office to see if they could help you.

Not wanting to mention the fact that you had been pranked, you tied your sweater around your waist and asked them if they had shorts you could borrow.

Luckily enough for you, they did and you were able to get changed as everyone in the lunch period filtered out to their next classes.

You grabbed a note from the office before rushing to your class, 3 minutes after the final bell had rung.

Entering the classroom, you tried to ignore the soft chuckled and looks of recognition you got, but your stomach clenched when you realized there was only one seat left.

Right in front of Rafe.

He sneered at you as you sat down, and you did your best to ignore him.

Halfway through class, his hot breath at your ear nearly made you jump out of your skin.

“Why were you so late to class, huh? Already running to mommy and daddy to tattle?” His whispered voice gave you chills and you ignored him, with great difficulty.

After whispering to you several more times and trying to get a rise out of you, he seemingly gave up.

Until you felt his finger hook underneath your bra strap at your back, pulling it back before snapping it against your skin.

You let out a gasp before spinning around in your chair to glare at him, “what’s your problem?!”

Rafe’s lips curled into a small smirk before responding, “what? I didn’t do anything.”

At this point your English teacher had noticed your outburst, walking over to you and Rafe with a stern look.

“Why are you disrupting my lesson? This better be good.”

You parted your lips, ready to respond, but Rafe beat you to it.

“I don’t know what’s going on with her, she just snapped at me,” he laid the charm on thick and you rolled your eyes.

“He’s lying!”

“Quiet, both of you! I don’t want to hear a word from either of you the rest of this class.” She chastised you, and you felt your cheeks burn with shame.

It just reminded you of him getting you in trouble years ago and you couldn’t believe that history was repeating itself.

The rest of your freshman year was no easier, with Rafe continuing to torture you and try to get you in trouble at school.

He never missed an opportunity to call you a ‘dirty Pogue,’ or shove you against the hard lockers whenever he spotted you in the hall.

Of course, no matter how many times you reported this to the school, often with witnesses, they always had their hands tied behind their back and deep in the pockets of Ward Cameron, who used his money and influence to shield his golden child of any and all consequences for his actions.

Sophomore year, his preferred method of torture was having his buddies pick on you in gym class. They would pummel you with dodgeballs as you huddled in the corner, the gym teacher laughing too hard to stop them.

Junior year, he broke into your locker, stealing all of your textbooks and breaking the locker door. Conveniently, the cameras were down that day and because you couldn’t prove that Rafe had done it, you and your parents had to pay for new textbooks and a new locker door.

Senior year, he and all of his friends on the football team took immense sadistic pleasure from whistling at and catcalling you whenever they saw you, albeit in or out of school.

You never assumed that he had suddenly had a change of heart about you and was now interested in you. No, you knew that this was just Rafe trying to get under your skin and make you as uncomfortable as possible.

To him, harassing you had clearly become a game, one that you were growing extremely weary of as it went ignored by school staff for longer and longer.

The sick grin that would spread across his face as you squirmed in front of him proved how much he enjoyed toying with you.

Despite Rafe literally chasing you down the hallway while repeatedly calling you a ‘slut’ at full volume because you had worn a shorter skirt to school than usual one time, none of the teacher or administrators ever took your side.

For four years, Rafe Cameron made your life a living hell, and you still just couldn’t understand why.

Yes, he hated Pogues, that much was clear to you after seeing his treatment of your friends, but he seemed to harbor a deeper resentment towards you than he did towards anyone else.

No one else was ever on the receiving end of such hateful and calculated behavior, and your friends all agreed that he seemed to have it out for you specifically.

When graduation rolled around, you were less excited about graduating high school than you were to finally be done with Rafe.

Considering the fact that you were off to college while he was going to community college in Outer Banks also gave you a sense of pride. Despite his wealthy background and many privileges, you were still starting your future on a better foot, looking forward to attending Duke University on a full ride scholarship.

Your first year there was a dream come true, a whirlwind of meeting new friends, working hard in your classes, and going out to parties for the first time.

Without Pogue vs Kook bullshit poisoning the air, you found that you were finally able to be yourself and find your real identity.

Dating was still somewhat new to you, but you had at the very least lost your virginity first semester of college on a hookup with a cute guy.

It wasn’t anything special, but it could have been worse, and you were just excited to get more experience as college went on.

After the second semester ended, you packed up your dorm room to move back to Outer Banks for the summer, excited to reconnect with old friends.

Which is how you found yourself in the front seat of your friend’s car, parked in the driveway outside of a huge house party as you quickly fixed your make up last minute.

“Let’s go, Y/N! My pregame buzz is already starting to wear off!” Olivia complained from the backseat and you quickly put away your makeup before giving yourself a once over in the car mirror.

“Are you really trying that hard to impress Outer Banks boys when the Duke hotties are just a summer away??” Jade asked beside you.

“I just want to be ready for whatever the night brings,” you giggled. “I’m keeping my options open for now.”

The girls laughed along with you.

“Well you look hot as fuck already, let’s gooo!” Jade opened her car door and stepped out before you could get another word in.

“Okay, fine!”

You stepped out of the car, feeling very confident in your short party dress and heels.

Walking up to the large, imposing house, you could already hear the music pulsing loudly from inside. There were people standing outside to talk and you recognized one or two of them, saying “hi!” on your way in.

Everything was much louder inside the luxurious house, which was absolutely packed with people. The deep bass of the music rumbled throughout the house, rattling around in your ribcage.

Since Olivia and Jade had gone to parties here before, you let them lead you into the kitchen where the drinks were.

A large variety of beers, hard liquor, seltzers, and jungle juice greeted you inside, but you headed straight for the jungle juice.

“Ooh it’s blue tonight!” Olivia noticed, “I bet it’s gonna be super sour.”

You poured yourself a glass before taking a sip to try it. It tasted like blue raspberry, and the alcohol level made you gag in surprise at first, but on the second try you found that you liked it a lot.

“It’s good! Wait should we all do a shot together too?” You locked eyes with your friends, a mischievous grin spreading across your face.

“Fuck yes,” Olivia cheered.

“I’m in!” Jade added and you poured out 3 shots.

Grabbing your shot glass, you raised it up, along with the other girls.

“Cheers!” You clinked them together, then tapped it down onto the table once before throwing it back.

“Okay, can we find the hot guys now?” Olivia joked and you nodded in agreement, reaching to pick up your drink.

Your hand slipped as you grabbed the plastic glass however, and it fell off the counter, spilling it’s contents all over the floor.

“Shit!” You cursed, looking around for some paper towels.

Your friends grabbed a roll off the fridge and handed it to you.

“Ugh I’m sorry!” You apologized as you got onto your hands and knees to clean up the mess. “Hey, you guys should scope out the people in the next room.”

“Ooh that’s a good idea! Let’s go Liv!” Jade grabbed Olivia by the arm and pulled her out of the kitchen, leaving you alone to mop up the sticky drink with paper towels.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” Rafe’s easily recognizable drawl made goosebumps erupt across your skin, and you froze in place. “Didn’t expect to see you here tonight.”

All of the sounds of the party seemed to zone out as you quickly stood up, turning to face him.

When you looked up at the man who now towered far above you, you could tell that he had changed in the year since you last saw him.

Rafe had never been a skinny guy, especially when he had played football throughout high school, but now he seemed more ripped than you had ever seen him. Clearly he had been using a lot of his time away from school to build up his physique.

You also noticed that he seemed to have grown into his face more, looking more lean and handsome than he did in high school.

The smirk that was plastered on his face was all too familiar to you though. It was the look he always had when he was playing games with you.

“Hi, Rafe,” you nervously answered. “I could say the same.”

He paused, his gaze flitting down before slowly working its way up your body. His blue eyes narrowed as they met yours and you repressed a full body shiver.

“It’s my house,” he took a step closer to you and you instinctively took one back. He chuckled at that. “That’s why I’m so surprised to see you, ‘specifically looking so dolled up.”

His words surprised you and you mentally kicked yourself for not pressing the girls for more details about whose party you were going to.

Honestly you were just surprised and a little hurt that Olivia and Jade would choose to bring you here knowing your history with Rafe.

“I- I had no clue this was your house,” you stammered, taking another step back to create more space between you and the taller man.

Despite the muffled sounds of the party around you, and the knowledge that your friends were just down the hall, you felt so incredibly alone in the now all too cramped kitchen.

“How’s Duke been treating you?” His face was even, but his nasally tone betrayed a hint of disdain.

“It’s been…” you paused, unsure what the best thing to say would be. “It’s been really good. My first year was easier than I expected, but still interesting.”

He was silent, just studying your face for a moment. Rafe’s nose twitched before he let out a flat, “that’s good.”

Already feeling a heightened anxiety from being around him, and feeling distrustful about his questions, you were ready to exit this conversation.

With your drink clutched in your hand, you made a weak excuse about needing to catch up with Olivia and Jade before trying to walk around him.

You were shocked however when he suddenly moved as you walked by, his fingers wrapping around your arm just above your elbow and stopping you in your tracks.

“What are you doing? Let go of me,” You demanded, looking up at him in confusion and trying to tug your arm out of his grasp.

He moved in front of you, blocking your exit path with his grip still firm on your arm.

“C’mon, wait a second, I- I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. I know I was really an asshole to you when we were younger, but that was so long ago, y’know? Could you just let me apologize to you?”

His words came out somewhat stammered, but still confident, and due to the forced proximity you could probably deduce why.

Rafe’s pupils were blown wide, his free hand gesturing in a jittery manner that could only point to one conclusion.

He was high as fuck.

“Please just- let go of me!” You begged with him again.

His eyes darkened, jaw tightening in annoyance as he looked down his nose at you. Rafe huffed, his lips parting to say something else but he was interrupted.

“Hey, what the fuck is going on here?”

You had never felt happier to hear Olivia’s voice. Glancing over Rafe’s shoulder, you could see her and Jade standing in the doorway glaring at Rafe.

Rafe immediately released you and you quickly rushed over to your friends.

“We were just catching up,” Rafe spoke with a casual ease as he turned to face you, like he hadn’t just corned you all alone at his party. It reminded you of all of the times you had tried to report him to teachers, only for him to sweet talk his way out of punishment.

“See ya around, Y/N.”

You shot him a dirty look before rushing out of the kitchen with Olivia and Jade in tow.

“What was that??” Jade asked as soon as the three of you were in the crowded living room.

“Better question, did you guys know this was Rafe Cameron’s house?” You angrily asked them.

You were still feeling shaken by the interaction. Maybe you should have anticipated that he would at the very least be at this party, but you had never expected he would be the one hosting it.

Olivia’s face dropped and she anxiously apologized, “Oh shit, I’m sorry. I honestly figured we wouldn’t run into him since there’s always just so many people here.”

“It’s okay,” you sighed. “He’s just being his normal, weird and creepy self. We probably won’t even see him again the rest of the night.”

You took a large swig of your drink to calm your nerves.

What this night needed was a distraction from Rafe Cameron, and you, Jade, and Olivia were still determined to have a good time tonight.

The three of you walked through the large house, coming across many familiar faces from high school.

Even while catching up with old friends though, you felt incredibly uneasy.

The feeling that there was a pair of eyes trained on you was burning at the back of your neck, and you weren’t surprised when you peeked behind yourself at one point to spot Rafe standing about 10 feet away among a group of guys.

Even when you met his gaze, his eyes didn’t flick away, and you shivered as he took a long drink from his solo cup, eyes never leaving yours.

Turning away from him and tuning your attention back into your friends, you couldn’t help but question yourself.

Were you crazy or was he looking at you differently?

The only times that he had even shown any interest in talking with you was before he was about to publicly humiliate you in some horrible way, but this time felt different.

There was something more behind his eyes that you couldn’t identify that raised alarms in your head.

No matter where you, Jade, and Olivia went, it seemed like Rafe wasn’t far behind. Despite joining the different groups nestled just out of view, you would catch a glimpse of him that would spike your pulse.

Your paranoia didn’t want you to get another drink. You felt almost unreasonably nervous about what might happen if Rafe trapped you alone, but you felt reassured by Jade and Olivia’s presence, emboldening you to serve yourself one more cup of the jungle juice.

That confidence quickly fizzled however, when halfway through finishing your drink, Jade found a cute guy to hook up with and split off from you and Olivia.

Olivia was quick to leave as well, despite your pleas that she stay with you, “there’s plenty of people you know here, Y/N! Just lighten up a bit, you’ll be fine!”

With neither of your friends beside you, you suddenly felt very alone and you looked around the room, hoping to find any high school acquaintances you could catch up with to avoid the awkward nervousness you felt right now.

Unluckily, you didn’t recognize anyone, so you threw back the rest of your drink and started making the rounds.

Downstairs yielded no results, so you made your way upstairs, hoping to find either Olivia and Jade or other friends to talk to.

You checked several rooms only to be unsuccessful in finding anyone that you knew.

Jade and Olivia hadn’t been responding to your texts and you were starting to get annoyed.

Upon finding another empty bedroom, you frustratedly sat down, pulling your phone out of your pocket to call one of them.

The sound of the door closing caught your attention, and you raised your head to see Rafe Cameron standing in front of the now closed bedroom door.

“Rafe?” Confusion tinged your shaky voice as you sat up, staring at him in the dimly lit room.

He got closer to the bed, never taking his eyes off of you. “D’you have any clue how crazy you drove me all through high school?”

A pit began to form in your stomach at his words and your throat felt tight as you looked up at the imposing blond.

His hair was disheveled, words slurring together as his angry blue eyes cut through you.

“What the hell are you talking about? If I remember correctly, you were the one torturing me!” You snipped back at him.

“You have no idea-” he sniffed, rubbing a shaky finger under his nose. “You think you’re so much better than me, hm?”

Rafe took another step closer and you shrunk in on yourself nervously, eyes darting to the door behind his looming figure. He seemed much more drunk and high now, a fact that made you even more uncomfortable.

“I- I don’t think that Rafe,” you stammered. “I never said that-”

“You didn’t have to, Y/N,” he bitterly sneered. “Y’moved out of Outer Banks for a year and now you think that makes you feel so high and mighty around the rest of us.”

“Rafe-”

“What makes you so special, hm?” He spat out, moving closer, now inches away from where you sat on the bed.

Your body was buzzing with anxious energy, but you felt frozen to the spot, completely caught off guard by this outburst from Rafe. There was nothing you could do to get yourself to move.

You had encountered Rafe when he had been drunk or high several times before, he was no stranger to coming to high school intoxicated. But you had never been trapped alone with him and completely at his mercy before and you couldn’t push down the nagging feeling that something awful was about to happen if you didn’t leave the room.

“You’re just Pogue trash, and let’s be real, it won’t be long till you fail out of college and you’re walking the streets of Outer Banks like the slut you are,” he growled and your cheeks heated up in anger.

You brought one arm up to push him back from you, but he snatched your wrist, fingers tightening around you painfully.

You let out a cry when he twisted your arm behind your back and he chuckled at the tears kissing your waterline.

“Still just the same uptight bitch you’ve always been, huh?” His eyes flitted down to your lips for a moment. He was so close you could clearly smell the alcohol on his hot breath.

“Let go of me, Rafe,” you whispered, voice shaking with fear. Sure, Rafe had been a nightmare before, but you never even imagined he would take it this far.

The taller man let out a short chuckle that sent a chill up your spine.

“Or what?” He smirked down at you, clearly enjoying your dismay at the situation he had forced you into. “Gonna tattle to a teacher?”

Your chest and throat felt tight, panic beginning to build inside you as you tried to deny what you were sure couldn’t be true.

“This isn’t fucking funny, Rafe.” You weakly tried, desperately hoping that this was just another one of his twisted pranks that he was taking too far to watch you squirm.

“You still think this is a joke, sweetheart?” He sneered, Figure Eight cockiness dripping from his nasally voice.

Time seemed to slow as Rafe leaned down, his lips covering yours as he released your wrist and locked his arm around the small of your back.

For a moment you were too shocked to react, but you quickly reached one arm up to push at his chest. Instead of pushing him away from you however, your force made you fall back against the bed, bringing him down with you.

He shamelessly grabbed at your waist, before trailing up, hands reaching past the neckline of your dress and traveling up to grope your tits as his lips found yours again.

You could barely process what was happening, your head still spinning from the alcohol. Rafe’s lips moved against yours, trailing across your cheek when your turned your head away from him to gasp for air.

One of his hands roughly grabbed your chin, pulling your jaw back towards him, and your stomach flipped at the feeling of him pushing his tongue into your mouth and groaning into the kiss.

When he shifted on top of you, grabbing your legs and spreading them apart, you struggled against him. Squirming on the bed, you managed to crawl away from him a bit, but his large hands grabbed your legs, pulling you back underneath him.

You froze when his fingers wrapped around your throat and you looked up at him with wide, nervous eyes.

“Stop fucking moving,” he huffed, forcing his free hand between your legs. He roughly pushed your dress up, pausing when he drank in your pink, lacy panties underneath.

Rafe licked his lips, a cruel smirk spreading across his face, “guess you’re not so innocent anymore, huh?”

Tears filled your eyes as you squirmed beneath him and the hand at your throat pressed down harder, pinning you in place.

His fingers ghosted over your core and you tilted your hips away from him, squeezing your thighs shut against his wandering hand.

Rafe’s eyebrows furrowed in annoyance, his blue eyes darkening as he scowled down at you.

“Y’know, I was almost gonna be nice to you…” His scowl disappeared as he trailed off, his pink lips curving into a sick grin. “But if you want to make this difficult, I can make it difficult too.”

You watched with fearful eyes as he reared one hand back, unable to flinch away due to his iron grip on your throat.

The cacophony of the party muffled your cry of pain when he slapped you hard. His golden rings made your cheek sting even more and you couldn’t stop your tears from spilling over.

Your ears were still ringing when you felt his hand leave your throat, but you were too dazed from the slap to react. Rafe’s impatient fingers dug into the skin of your thighs as he pulled your panties down your legs.

Time slowed as you could hear your heart thundering in your chest and you leaned up on your elbows to watch Rafe push his shorts down before palming his already hard cock. He was bigger than the guy you lost your virginity to, and much thicker.

Tongue thick and heavy in your mouth, you tried to tell him to stop, but the blood was rushing in your ears so loudly you couldn’t hear your own voice.

Rafe heard you though, and you watched him roll his eyes before ignoring your pleas.

He shifted on top of you, roughly parting your legs before placing himself between them. The blond wrapped a hand around the base of his cock, guiding it to your core and you struggled beneath him when he dragged the tip along your already slick lips.

“Fuck-” his low groan made your stomach flip. You reached up one hand to weakly push at his shoulders, but he swatted you away.

There was nothing you could do but watch as he planted one hand on the mattress to brace himself before pushing the tip of his cock between your folds and forcing himself inside your tight cunt.

“Rafe-” Your protest was cut off when his hand slapped over your mouth. Hot tears fell past your lashes as Rafe slowly stretched you out inch by inch.

His piercing eyes never left yours, watching your face with a sick delight as he violated you.

You shifted uncomfortably beneath him as he split you open, and you winced when he grabbed your arm, fingers digging in to your tender flesh.

You whimpered when his tip grazed your cervix. The blond tilted his hips back before pushing himself deep into you again.

Rafe let out a shaky breath, his cock twitching as you squeezed around him.

“Shit, if I knew you felt this good, I would’ve tried you out years ago,” he chuckled darkly, words slurring together.

His hand was removed from your mouth only to be replaced by his lips. You shuddered when he forced his tongue into your mouth, and you could taste the liquor on his lips.

Rafe pulled away from the kiss as he slowly began rocking his hips back and forth, stretching you out around his thick cock again and again.

Your hands came to his shoulders, nails digging in to his tanned skin as you tried to slow his pace.

Unfortunately, your attempts only amused Rafe, who sneered down at you cruelly before picking up his pace, forcing himself deep into your snug walls.

Intoxication clouded your mind, and the room seemed to be spinning even faster now.

“Fuck-” you moaned when he hit a spot that made you see stars. “Mm please-”

You were momentarily broken from the spell however when one of Rafe’s strong hands wrapped around your throat, stealing your breath.

When you tensed in fear, involuntarily squeezing around his cock, Rafe groaned, watching your misty, fearful eyes roll back in your head with each thrust.

“You look so pretty right now, Y/N. All teary eyed and cock drunk,” the blond whispered.

You wanted so badly to be able to escape, to avoid the wicked things he was doing to you, but you were so painfully aware, as every sensation was heightened by your terror.

Hips still snapping against yours, Rafe leaned down, his hungry lips finding yours. With his hand at your throat, you couldn’t turn away, and you clenched around him when he pushed his tongue into your mouth. His lips slid over yours greedily, refusing to stop until you clutched at the hand at your throat.

You took a gasping breath when he finally pulled away, your tears falling more freely now, and Rafe kissed your cheeks, licking up your salty tears.

“Perfect little Y/N is such a mess, huh?” He mocked you, mumbling against your skin before sloppily kissing you again.

You couldn’t deny the overwhelming feeling building between your legs, no matter how much it disgusted you. Shame clutched you when you felt yourself growing slicker with his every thrust.

“Don’t-” you whimpered when he hit a sensitive spot. “Stop-!”

Your assailant snickered at that, relishing your pitiful protests, “do you even know what you want right now? Y’think you’re so smart, till you take some cock and you turn into a stupid slut.”

His degrading words cut deep and your cheeks flushed in humiliation, tears spilling past your lashes.

Rafe’s pace was downright punishing, the sound of his balls slapping against your ass along with the lewd sounds of your wetness filled the room, punctuated by your whimpers and the coerced moans he drew out of you.

Hatred and resentment burned behind his blue eyes as he watched you squirm beneath him, only taking his eyes off of your face to watch his cock push in and out of your tight cunt.

Drawing even closer to the edge, you could feel the dam inside of you ready to burst, and Rafe could too; you were practically pulsing around him now.

“Yeah, that’s it sweetheart.” His low, nasally voice made your stomach flip, and you squeezed your eyes shut as you tried to resist the inevitable. “Just do the one thing stupid sluts like you are good for and make a mess all over my cock.”

With another thrust, the dam burst, and you whined as your orgasm cut through you.

Rafe fucked you through it, cursing when he felt you squeezing around him like a vice. His grip on your throat tightened as his pace reached a crescendo.

“Fuck-” he growled, his hips stuttering before he pushed deep into you one more time, painting your walls with his sticky cum.

You squirmed beneath him, trying to push him off of you, but he easily grabbed your wrists, pining them down as he stayed buried inside you. You felt nauseous when his cock pulsed as you struggled, the reminder that he was still getting off on your distress was sickening.

His lips draped over yours again and you whimpered into the kiss, body still shaking as you tried to wrap your head around what had just happened.

By the time he broke the kiss, your head was spinning, and you somehow felt more drunk than when you had first entered the room.

When Rafe finally pulled out of you, you shuddered because you could feel his cum slowly leaking out of you.

Instead of getting off the bed like you expected, the blond shifted on top of you, lowering himself to get a better view of your sore pussy.

“Shit, Y/N, hope you’re on a good birth control,” he chuckled wickedly, and you squirmed when he used two fingers to push his cum deep inside of your sensitive cunt. “Cause there’s no way in hell I’m paying child support for some Pogue brat.”

Your cheeks burned in anger and shame, fear and disgust sparking in your gut at his words.

Rafe pulled his fingers out and climbed off the bed, quickly pulling his clothes back on before seemingly looking around for something as you slowly sat up.

He found what he was looking for, picking up your pink panties from the ground before locking eyes with you and then stuffing them into his pocket.

You shivered as he triumphantly smirked down at you, “I’m gonna.. get back to the party... You should clean yourself up, you look pathetic right now.”

Embarrassed, you looked down at the bed, not wanting to meet his eyes as he further humiliated you.

“And uh, don’t let me catch you alone again, Y/N,” Rafe sneered, laughing as he closed the door behind him.

[starboye]

pairing: nate jacobs x male reader

request: Nate Jacobs learns that Male reader is a new student, and he tries to have a one-night stand with him or something, but male reader immediately shows his dislike towards Nate. This catches Nate off guard, and he tries to "be friends" with him, but Male reader declines or simply walks away from Nate causing Nate to be furious and more determined to get in bed with him, however, Nate soon realizes he catches feelings for Male reader and wants to him to be his boyfriend?

warnings: fluff, mentions of sex, cursing, kissing

you had just moved to california after your dad got a big promotion so of course you were the new student at east highland highschool, you heard some good and bad things about it (mostly bad things) but nonetheless you went and of course they assigned you a school guide, some guy named nate jacobs and immediately he wanted you.

he showed you around the school, showing you the great wonders that came with the highschool in the most monotone voice but from time to time he'd glance over to admire your ass, that luscious ass he wanted to fuck so badly "hey wanna come to a party, its happening later tonight if you wanna swing by" nate asks trying to appear nonchalant "yeah id be down" you say mimicking his nonchalant.

and with that you and nate finished the tour and said good bye to each other, but for some reason you couldn't escape nates mind, no matter how hard he tried to think of something else the thought of you always bounced around in his mind, was it maybe that he actually liked you no impossible he just wants to fuck you that's it nate lied to himself as the bell rang and school ended.

you entered the house party to the sound of loud ruckus, people yelling, and music blaring, with the overwhelming smell of alcohol, but luckily you noticed nate as he waved you over "50 bucks says i fuck this slut by the end of the night" nate says to his friends as you walk closer "ill take that bet" mckay says before nate walks over to you "wanna get some drinks" nate asks leaning over to near your ear so you could hear him better "yeah sure" you yell back before walking over to a more quiet part of the house.

"so what's a sweet thing like you doing here all alone" nate asks sipping on his drink as you lean onto a wall "no friends" you reply looking up at him with disinterested eyes "well wanna make a friend tonight" nate smirks placing his hand beside you head on the wall and leaning over you "is this your way of flirting" you ask snickering a bit.

"what" nate questions leaning back up "if you wanna sleep with me just ask" you chuckle taking another sip of your drink "well then wanna have sex with me" nate asks thinking he's about to easily win his bet but his hopes are killed when you respond with no "why don't you wanna sleep with me" he asks "because you look like a total douche" you say before walking away to get another drink, nate watched as your fine ass walked away from him, he was now determined to have sex with you.

after that day you caught him watching you, whether that be in his truck as you walked home from school or from afar while you were doing school work, he'd even sometimes buy you expansive gifts with handwritten notes that you're sure he got from pinterest but you shut him down every time "c'mon just once" nate pleas "no nate, not now and not ever" you say giving him the diamond bracelet back and walking away as he was forced to watch that ass walk away for the hundredth time.

nate sat up at night wondering why he wanted you so much, why he needed to sleep with you so badly, was it because he felt something deeper for you and wanted to try and push that feeling out by sleeping with you but it would inevitably come back up... no it couldn't possibly be that, but the thought was to much, he got up and drove to your house in the middle of the night.

"you up" nate texted your number (he had got it from you on the first day of school) "what do you want" you text back "come outside" he texts, you look outside to see his truck on the other side of the street and huff before putting on some clothes and walking out to his car, seeing him with a little smile on his face you get into the passenger seat "what do you want nate" you ask slightly agitated as nate just woke you up.

"okay so i- ive been thinking right and... i don't know how to say this but..." nate stammers over his words making you even more annoyed "just spit it out" you say leaning over the arm rest to kiss him, his lips lightly chasing after yours "uhm i was gonna ask will you be my boyfriend" nate nervously asks "yes" you smile finally seeing the nate that isn't a sex hungry animal "so does that mean we can fuck now" nate asks.

"one step at a time you horny fuck" you say before opening the door to get out the car but nate pulls you back one last time to kiss you, this kiss more passionate and heartfelt than the last, maybe fucking him wouldn't be the worst thing ever

taglist: @spermeboy @mailmango @ghostking4m @gayaristocrat

[zivazivc]

What kind of nu metal music fits Les's band?

First of all I gotta clarify that I sent this ask myself because I accidentally lost the original through constant editing and drafting. I realize I could just make a regular text post but I'm quirky like that, and a question is a nice little attention grabber for those who are interested.

Anyway...

It's hard to point at one song and say this is their sound, because A: I'm picky, B: the band's style changes over time, and C: I don't know what I'm doing lmao

This answer is very long uhh I don't seem to be able to form short responses, mi scusi 😅

Back at home the brothers' music and then also the first year on the road with Flea the band sounds like the albums Music and especially Grassroots by 311. (Grassroots is such a banger of an album, I listen to it all the time, really recommend.)

Hed's the main influence on the band's sound because he's the main vocalist, songwriter and overall the most invested in the band succeeding (Les's main concern is making ends meet, and Flea is just enjoying the ride lol). At the start Hed and Les have had basically no contact with Rock Trolls so even though they're both more metal/punk than regular rock, their "rock side" is softer at this point. Hed also grew up with hip hop because of his peers so there's a lot of rapping in his lyrics. And he also incorporates reggae into his style a lot because of his favorite uncle, Kymani (one of the guys who live with Ish) who is a Reggae Troll. Hed is pretty much a sponge when it comes to music, much like Floyd. The closest I can come to describing his genre is a fusion of Rap Metal and Reggae Rock which are both already fusion genres jskksdjsk

(The band 311 has two singers and oddly they both sound like Hed and Les to me. SA Martinez (the higher of the two voices) sounds 100%, exactly like how I've imagined Hed's voice in my head. For Les I have a different voice claim because Les's personal style of music is much different from the band, but Nick Hexum (the lead vocalist here) is still in the second place when it comes to voice alone. Imagine my enthusiastic surprise finding voices for both brothers in the same band 😄)

examples from the two albums:

...

While driving around and performing small gigs they come in contact with the alternative and nu metal scene and meet a lot of Rock Trolls (mostly various Metal Trolls) and other mixed trolls, and in the following couple of years their sound gradually becomes heavier (Hed rediscovers screamo lol) and they go from rock to metal.

A year into their "touring" is also around the time Hed meets and starts dating Liv and gets her to join the band. Liv's genre has the heaviest sound of all of them (Industrial/EBM), which influences Hed and the band too. And with Liv on the drums, Hed takes over DJ-ing and is also able to put more focus on the vocals, which also makes Les step down and only sing backing vocals with the rest of the band if needed.

The band in this era sounds like the album Revolution by Insolence and to some degree Introduction to Mayhem by Primer 55.

examples from the albums:

...

Two years into the bands existence is when Floyd runs into them. At first he's more just standing there, observing their practices and performances warily, because he's had bad experiences with Rock Trolls in his one year alone and metal music still kinda freaks him out at this point. But he soon starts joining in in melodic parts and then it progresses into him singing longer and longer segments because he has the strongest vocals of everyone. And once he saves enough of his earnings for a guitar he starts playing the rhythm guitar too. (The guitar he took with him when he left the Troll Tree got stolen before he met the band.)

I guess I should clarify: Flea is the lead guitarist, Les is the bassist, and Liv and Hed switch on the drums and DJ-ing depending on the track. At one point they also get a keyboard.

It's also not that long before Hed and Floyd start actively writing songs together, sharing each others notes, and they start to split the singing parts more evenly. Hed even teaches Floyd screamo techniques, because he thinks Floyd has a great voice for them (He is correct, Floyd has a mean scream 😁).

During this time the band still pretty much sounds like Revolution by Insolence but with more melodic singing parts from Floyd (and screaming/shouting lmao). I think Verge of Umbra is another good band to compare, it sounds more clean and Floydy but still Hedy. (Man, I should write scientific research papers skjdkjf)

↑↑↑ song with the lyrics from the drawing at the top

From here on out I'm a bit unsure how the band's sound develops, but I'm pretty sure Floyd would unintentionally infect them with a mild case of radio friendliness (Pop trolls can't help their in your face nature lmao 😞). So for now I'm stopping here...

This took me days of searching and writing so I would appreciate to hear any thoughts you have if you've come this far and given some of the songs a listen. :)

[fairlyang]

Meant to be 🕷️

⋆˙⟡♡✧˖° love island au x miguel o’hara ⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°

★‧°𖦹｡⋆ miguel o’hara x mexicana!bombshell!reader ⋆｡𖦹°‧★

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ W/C: 9.1K

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ CONTENT: meeting the islanders, interesting reactions, learning about the islanders, more interesting reactions, spilling some tea x2, maybe turning multiple heads, girl talk, miguel being honest, grand tour

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ SUMMARY: you finally get to meet the other islanders, will there be tension in the air? will any heads be turned? keep reading to find out!

NOTES: there are two peters! the second I imagine to be a mix of andrew’s and insomniacs peter parker bc I love them both!! hopefully it won’t be too confusing 🫢 I’ll always try to refer to Peter B w the B!! (and I’m picturing the liuk s5 villa!)

previous part — series masterlist

Chapter 2. Sparks

You let go of Miguel’s arm and all the guys walked over to you both with wide smiles, “Guys this is Y/n.” He introduces you to them and you first hug Peter B, who was grinning his face off and the first to come up to you.

“So nice to meet you.” You say and he pulls away, checking you out for a second before grabbing your hand and giving you a quick spin.

“Nice to meet you too, wow you are stunning.” He says making you laugh then smile.

“Thank you! You’re so sweet.” You respond and go in to hug another islander who you recognized to be Daniel.

“Hi nice to meet you!” He says in your ear and you pull away saying the same.

You remember him being from Colombia which definitely also had him on the top spot of your list because you loved your fellow Latinos.

Up next was the second Peter and his hug was a little awkward but he seemed like the most introverted of the group so you understood. “Ooo I love your tattoo!” You compliment and point to his spider tattoo on his forearm.

“Oh thanks! It’s one of my favorite ones.” He says with a small smile making you aww.

After him was David, who was the literal definition of tall, dark, and handsome. He was for sure above 6’0, had a body sculpted by gods, and had some neat braids.

He was checking you out as Peter showed you another tattoo to which he just joked to stop hogging you.

You laughed and Peter just mumbled an apology to which you just replied saying you’d love to see them tomorrow so he wouldn’t feel bad.

You hugged David, having to reach up more than the others, and he hugged you back before realizing you were still wet and quickly pulled away from you. “What are you scared of a little water?” You tease and he scoffs.

“No… I just didn’t expect it.” He sassily says which almost had you gagging because huh?

“We just came back from the hot tub? Why wouldn’t we be wet…?” You challenge and he’s left speechless.

All brawn no brain, how sad.

And somewhat of an immediate ick, not a good sign.

The last two were the newest bombshells, Raul and Jordan. They both pulled you in for a hug at the same time making you smile. “Welcome to the villa!” Jordan said with a wide grin as they pulled away from you.

“Aww thank you!” You say excitedly, feeling at ease with other people that have been in your shoes.

“What an entrance I gotta say!” Raul compliments making you laugh.

“I wasn’t sure how exactly to go about it I can’t lie.” You laugh and they both give you smiles.

Raul is from Puerto Rico, has brown curly hair, and pretty hazel eyes. He was just gorgeous and from what you’ve seen, such a sweetheart. He was the one always making coffees for anyone who wanted one and even breakfast.

Jordan has brown skin, some locs, and from what you could remember he said his nationality was Nigerian but has been living in the states since he was a teenager.

At this point all of them caught your eye and you’ll be so busy tomorrow.

All the guys were behind you as the two new guys started a conversation with you, well mostly giving advice on toe stepping and to not be afraid to do it since you were in here for you.

You heard some murmurs behind you and you turned around to find two of the girls came into the kitchen.

“Oh my god you look so hot.” MJ says with wide eyes before pulling you in for a hug.

You laugh and pulled away checking her out too, “you’re pretty hot yourself girl.”

“Stop it.” She waves you off then gives you a kind smile.

“Now that is how you bombshell.” Gwen says, playfully pointing a finger at you and you giggle before hugging her.

“Yeah y’know someone had to do it.” You joked making them both chuckle.

“You guys are so gorgeous.” You say and admire how pretty MJ looked in red as well as how Gwen was rocking a black suit.

“Literally so hot.” You compliment making them both go on to compliment you.

You went on to say how you loved specific things about their outfits meanwhile you could somewhat hear Peter B yell behind you. “Girls come say hi!”

You tried to not make a face, given three of the girls didn’t come up to say anything since you got here. You weren’t going to say it was rude but you sure were thinking it.

It didn’t help that you heard groans as they stood up from the daybeds and at that point they shouldn’t have even bothered.

The guys in front of you were giving them slight glares and just confused on why they were acting like this because not even the guys were this petty when the guy bombshells came in.

You looked at Miguel and he was shaking his head, he then locked eyes with you and gave you a sympathetic smile. You gave him a shrug and gave him wide eyes then looked to your left and right.

He chuckled and finally you heard the clicks of heels getting closer. You looked over and there were the rest of the girls with annoyed looks on their faces.

“Geez if it’s that much trouble they shouldn’t even come.” You mutter and MJ sighs.

“I don’t know why they’re like this, it’s just unnecessary and rude.” She says and grabs your hand, giving it a squeeze.

“The guys don’t look too happy about it either.” Gwen whispers to you and you look at them.

Sure enough they were all shaking their heads in disapproval. Especially Miguel and the Peter’s.

“What is wrong with you guys?” Peter mumbles under his breath and Jazmin just rolls her eyes.

“We weren’t like this when Raul and Jordan came in and they took four of you on dates..” Daniel mutters, making Dana scoff.

“Well they didn’t take-“ she said but then cuts herself off because her point wasn’t even going to make sense considering Jordan snatched Jazmin from Daniel last night.

“Have some hospitality, come on you girls are better than this.” Miguel mumbles and shakes his head.

“It’s not like we’re gonna be the bestest of friends. She’s gonna steal one of you from us.” Valeria complains and pouts.

“Ah so now you don’t like that the shoe is on the other foot huh?” David chimes in and she folds her arms against her chest realizing he had a point.

At this point Gwen, MJ, Raul, and Jordan were all trying to distract you by letting you ask questions about them which let you know that MJ was an aspiring actress, Gwen had a biochem degree (which had you questioning why Miguel wished there were science nerds in here), Raul was a chef, and Jordan was a model which didn’t surprise you in the slightest.

The girls sighed then looked at each other and just shrugged, now walking over to you. Valeria was the first to introduce herself, the fake facade going away and actually giving you a genuine smile. “Hi I’m Valeria but you can call me Val. Nice to meet you girl.” She says and going in for a hug.

You hug her back then pull away, your eyes gravitating to her cute planet necklace. “Your necklace is so cute! Where did you get it?” You ask and she squeals.

“It’s from Vivienne Westwood! They had a small line of jewelry with these pendants. This was gifted by a family friend.” She says enthusiastically making you aw.

“That’s such a sweet gift, it’s so pretty.” You compliment once again and she grins.

It seemed like she was easily swayed to act one way because this Val seemed nice once she wasn’t just with the other two.

She was on the shorter side, had long navy blue hair, and fair skin. She was really gorgeous.

“It’s nice to meet you Val, hope we can befriend each other this summer.” You say and she nods.

“I’d like that.” She replies and steps aside so the next one can go.

Up next was Jazmin, who gave you a wave, then went in for a hug. It was short but sweet and you were just astounded they had the mindset of not even greeting you because you went on one date.

On the first week too, which makes it like ten times scarier.

She then quickly introduces herself then stands by Val, not at all bothered to hear your response.

She was tall, had brown skin, with cornrows in a high ponytail, and wearing a black bodycon dress. She was also a stunner.

Lastly was Dana, who couldn’t wipe that look off her face as hard as she tried. And how could she?

You had just gone on a date with her so called soulmate and yet he was beaming as soon as he got back. She quickly noticed the way he and Peter B began whispering in each others faces after Peter spun you.

She couldn’t even be bothered to act nice because she needed to know Miguel’s thoughts on the date but knowing damn well he’s going to tell the guys first.

“Welcome to the villa.” She says dryly and the energy with everyone there just felt so off.

That was until Peter B yelled that everyone should go to the firepit.

“Let’s go!” He yells and everyone scrambled out of the kitchen.

Dana and Jazmin zoomed to the firepit and were whispering to each other while Daniel and Raul both offered you their arm so you linked arms with both of them as you headed down.

The rest all walked down together and your nerves grew once again. You were going to be the center of attention and it was really hitting you of what it was you had to do here.

You were going to step on so many toes and half the girls were already giving you the stank eye. All the guys were fine and you’d probably have to make you mind up after 48 hours and that’s just your anxiety thinking far ahead.

Raul must’ve somehow sensed it and just whispered some calming words, saying he felt the same way and everything turned out fine, for the most part.

You just nodded and took a deep breath as they led you to the middle of the firepit. You sat down and unlinked your arms but they still sat next to you.

You felt a shiver go down your spine and because the sun was setting, it was already getting darker which meant it’s slightly getting colder and you’re in a bikini while the girls are fully clothed.

At least Miguel was also in the same boat as you, but maybe he was good with the cold considering he was from New York.

You looked for him, quickly finding him to be next to Raul, who was on your right. He was fine. Not even shivering a tiny bit. And he was still looking as fine as ever.

As everyone sat down they all turned to look at you and you quickly remembered what you had prepared in your head nearly all day. “Hi I’m Y/n, I’m twenty four, I live in Houston, just graduated from nursing school, and I’m looking for the love of my life!”

Peter B was the first to yell, “FUCK YEAH!!” Everyone else followed suit and you quickly realized that Peter would instantly be an amazing hype man.

“What’s your type?” Jordan asks and you hummed.

“Physical type all I ask for is someone taller than me. I’ve gone out with all kinds of people and personality is a big thing as well. Also need someone I can laugh with over the dumbest things.” You reply and he nods while some of the other guys hum.

“How about last relationship?” Peter asks and you quickly respond.

“Two years ago! He was very childish by the end of the relationship and it made me realize I didn’t want to date a boy.” You explain while looking around to not have just eye contact with one person.

“Ah so you’re looking for a man?” David asks and you nod.

“Exactly. I don’t want to play any more games and hopefully I won’t have to.” You say and chuckle.

“Who do you have your eye on?” MJ asks making you laugh.

“On to the bigger questions huh?” You joke and she nods.

“Hmm… Well I think I gotta keep my cards close to my chest but all the guys are fine so I’m in for a wild ride.” you say and a few of the guys cheer but you laughed at Peter B giving Miguel a fist bump.

“Honestly I think I’m just going to get to know everyone and see where it goes!” You add and some murmur in agreement.

“Well welcome to the villa!” Raul says and wraps his arm around you, giving you a little side hug as some of the other guys cheer.

“Hey Y/n do you wanna have a little girl’s chat?” MJ asks and you nod.

“Let’s do itttt.” You say and stand up along with the other girls.

“Where do you wanna go?” Gwen asks and you look around as you all walk away from the fire pit.

“How about the swing set?” You suggest and you all start making your way there.

As soon as you were out of ear shot the guys all immediately gather together and are silent but with sly hand motions and reactions, they all get their point across that they find you attractive.

Then once they saw you were all sat, they all started talking at the same time.

“Dude-“

“I know-“

“We’re so in trouble.”

“That bikini..”

“She’s stunning.”

“Wait so how’d the date go?!?” Peter B impatiently asked and wrapped his around around Miguel’s shoulder.

They all remembered and quickly turned to look at him, wanting to know the details.

“It went… very well.” He says slowly, trying to carefully think of what he wants to say.

He knows the guys won’t entirely snitch on him but if any of the girls press hard enough one of them might crack so he’ll be safer than sorry with carefully selected phrasing than careless ones that could potentially hurt Dana.

“Come on Mig, give us more than that!” Second Peter nagged making Miguel chuckle.

“Alright, it went really good. Honestly such a nice first date, better than I could’ve imagined.” He says and tries to stop a smile from taking over his face but the guys called it out quick, and loudly.

“OH MY GOD I KNEW IT!”

“So happy for you bro.”

“It’s what you needed.”

“Mans is cheesin’!!”

After Peter B’s loud outburst, he shushed them so their reactions wouldn’t give him away just yet. He still had to have that conversation with Dana before they went to bed.

“I didn’t think an instant spark would happen for me, let alone a bit of love at first sight-“ he starts but gets brutally interrupted with the guys patting him on the back and struggling to not yell in excitement for him.

“Explain!” Daniel mutters under his breath and the rest nod their heads meanwhile Peter B next to him was nearly shaking in anticipation.

“I don’t know when I walked in and saw her I was just kind of speechless. I thought I was just going to be up there nearly drooling and not able to snap out of it but we got to talking as soon as she said hey and I can’t believe how effortless our conversations were.” He admits, feeling his face grow hot which prompted the guys to laugh and Peter B to poke his cheeks.

But he could tell they were happy for him, their wide grins were a dead giveaway.

“She was just so energetic and we had so much in common. It really felt like I could talk to her about absolutely anything.” He says and the guys nod.

“Bro I’m so happy for you.” David says and daps him up.

“Clearly the public knew what needed to be done.” Jordan snickers, making the guys burst out laughing.

“Stop-“ Daniel mutters and covers his mouth in shock.

After a few more seconds of them just laughing Miguel remembered something he wanted to tell them.

“Oh and she’s a latina. Fluent in Spanish and the conversation was flowing I forgot to ask from where.” He says and Raul gasps.

“Nah really?” Raul says sarcastically, making Miguel roll his eyes.

“To be fair Val is Mexican and isn’t fluent.” Daniel chimes in and Raul hums.

“Have a point there. Pero Y/n esta hermosa y habla el lenguaje.” He says and has both Miguel and Daniel murmuring in agreement. (But Y/n is gorgeous and speaks the language)

“Is she turning your head already then?” Peter jokes and he just shrugs.

“It’s just a plus when a girl speaks the mother language.” He admits and then gives a sheepish grin.

“Fair enough.”

“I get that.”

“Y saben es un poco coqueta..” Miguel says making Raul and Daniel both widen their eyes a little. (And y’know she’s a little flirty..)

“Nomas un poco..?” Raul asks with a raised eyebrow, curiosity getting the best of him and Miguel shrugs. (Only a little..?)

“Tal ves lo tienes que confírmalo tu mismo.” Miguel suggests and Raul just nods. (Maybe you need to confirm it yourself)

“Tal ves si lo haré.” He responds and look over at the girls on the swing but more specifically looking at you. (Maybe I will)

Miguel chuckled and looked at how confused the rest of them were before quickly translating the first thing he said, “I said that she’s a bit flirty.”

“Oh is she?” Jordan asks and Miguel had to do the same thing he did to Raul.

“Maybe you should find out for yourself.” He says earning himself a laugh from Jordan.

“Maybe I will.” He responds back and Miguel, Raul and Daniel all burst out laughing.

“Oh my god you guys do share a braincell-“ Daniel jokes and Jordan just groans.

“We said the same thing again?” He asks and just shakes his head when the guys answered.

“Best bromance love island’s ever seen.” David teases and Jordan flips him off.

“Wait Miguel what rating would you give the date then?” Peter asks and Miguel calms himself down then hums.

“Thirteen out of ten.” He replies and the guys scream and cheer, completely forgetting about being quiet.

“You’re gonna pursue her right? Like come on you have to.” Peter B says with a cheeky grin.

He takes a few seconds for a dramatic pause just so Peter B can get annoyed at him making him wait. “I’d be the dumbest man alive if I don’t.” He admits, looking at them giving him the cheesiest of grins imaginable.

“Good man.”

“Absolutely.”

“Wait Miguel did you kiss her?” David asks and he shakes his head.

“No, it would’ve been too soon and I really need to pull Dana before we go to sleep.” He says and Peter B lets out some coughs.

“Should’ve just done it.” He mutters between coughs making Miguel roll his eyes.

“I wouldn’t wanna hurt Dana like that, it’s not fair to her.” He mumbled and they nodded.

“It’s going to be tough.” Raul says, giving him a sympathetic smile.

“Knowing Dana, she is not going to believe you and will just assume Y/n turned your head, which she might have… but that’s besides the point.” Peter B rambles and continues, “she might just assume you’re only having these feelings because a new girl came in.”

“That’s why I’d like to talk to her before it’s too late.” Miguel says making the guys hum.

Luckily all the girls were preoccupied listening to your side of the story to go off on the guys for how disrespectful they were being. Luck was on your side boys!

As soon as you had sat down on the swing all the girls bombarded you with questions and you really should’ve seen it coming.

“How was the date?”

“So who do you have your eye on?”

“What’s your actual type?”

“Did you kiss him?”

You nervously laugh and look at them as they’re awaiting your answer to probably all their questions.

MJ was the only one who didn’t ask something and she was just as stunned as you. Gwen also didn’t expect for the other three to ask you anything considering how they’ve been acting since Miguel got the text.

Dana was a mess and started bawling her eyes out because she didn’t even get to say anything to him or hug him before he left. The other two instantly got into cliquey mean girl mode and said things like no girl could take Miguel from her and that you wouldn’t be prettier than her which had MJ and Gwen feeling so uncomfortable.

To them it just felt like an unnecessary thing to say and they were all in the earliest of days getting to know one another. There’s no point in trying to bring Dana up by bringing another girl down.

They tried to make her feel better but their actual kind words just weren’t what she wanted to hear. So of course the other two told her what she wanted to hear to cheer her up, not like any of them would now say any of that stuff to your face right now.

“Honestly the date was amazing, I think we just clicked and bounced off each other so naturally and quickly found out how much we had in common.” You start and pray you wouldn’t get your ass beat then and there.

“He was very sweet and I was pleasantly surprised that he could actually hold a decent conversation with me.” You added making MJ giggle.

“Honestly he’s such a sweetie, just very playful when he wants to be.” she says and you nod.

“I definitely got that vibe! He looks like he’d break some hearts but that date just showed the total opposite.” You reply then chuckle. “At least for now y’know.” You quickly add because you didn’t really want to jinx yourself.

“And as for who I have my eye on… genuinely I don’t have any names. I’d like to talk to them all tomorrow and see what’s up with them all because they all seem so sweet.” You explain and that clearly did not sit well with the cliquey trio, even Val.

“I didn’t lie about my type and no I did not kiss him.” You say and look at the two who asked.

Dana looked like she was going to explode and Jazmin didn’t really care, the difference in their reactions was very telling and you were astounded that they were this judgemental.

“Did you feel any sparks?” Gwen asks and Dana’s face got red fast.

You collected your thoughts and debated on whether or not you’d be honest. They might be able to tell if you lie but even if you did, you’d just feel guilty of it.

“I did feel some sparks but we’ll just have to see if they were reciprocated..” You say and shrug, but mentally praying that they were.

Dana’s eyes were twitching and she was very clearly not expecting to hear positive things from the date.

Now she was the one praying that he didn’t feel a thing and they’d be fine until the end. She wanted to be one of those day one couples that had an absolute perfect run, no turmoil, no heads turned, well behaved in casa, and have a smooth finish by splitting the money.

It’s something that’s rare because a lot of people find it hard to be loyal and to just stick with one person for the whole two months. She was thinking it’d be smooth sailing for her and Miguel, having no idea what was to come for her.

“Well Mig seemed very happy when he got here! I feel like it’s good to explore different connections during the first week.” MJ says and Dana gave her the biggest death glare possible.

“Oh for sure! I feel like it’s just gonna be a part of the experince.” You say and she nods.

“Exactly! It’s like a ‘what if’ situation y’know? Like what if you just click with someone more than you expected because you didn’t give them a fair shot to begin with?” Her example made perfect sense and you wouldn’t expect whoever you’d end up choosing to couple up with to just be closed off so soon. Sure some jealousy may occur but that’d be a normal reaction.

Especially if you do end up feeling Miguel more because that date really was the epitome of a perfect first date. Just getting along well, making each other laugh, and a side of flirting? What else could you have asked for?

And him being a perfect gentleman was an extra plus that was so nice to see.

“I feel like because being in here is such a different situation to the outside, you may as well get to know everyone while you can. As long as everyone’s being honest, why not?” You say and MJ nods.

“I’ve been telling Peter he could get to know other girls but he’s the one that has all his eggs on my basket.” She playfully rolls her eyes making you chuckle.

“To be fair it does look like you guys get on incredibly well.” You say truthfully, earning yourself a grin from the redhead.

“Do you really think so?” She asks and you scoff.

“No doubt about it!” You wave her off and she shrugs.

“Well I’m glad what we have is noticeable on the outside then.” She says, feeling her cheeks go warm.

“How are the rest of you in your couples?” You ask looking at the other girls and Dana just chuckles.

“Shouldn’t we be asking you more questions?” Dana asks with a raised brow.

“I mean you could… but I kind of wanted to hear how you guys feel in your couples.” You say and she hums.

“Well Miguel and I are doing great. I’ve never been so happy to meet someone right off the bat that just gets me. I honestly see a bright future with him.” She says and you nod, slightly feeling bad knowing Miguel has been wanting to tell her the truth.

“How about you Gwen?” You look to your left and she tries to hide a smile.

“I’m happy with the pace we’re going, I definitely feel sparks when I’m with him and the more I talk to him, the more I feel myself liking him.” She admits making you aww.

“He seems so sweet! I wish you two the best.” You say and she smiles, “thanks babe, you’re so sweet.”

“I honestly don’t know which I like more. I was feeling a little something with David but then Raul came and kinda sweeped me off my feet which is just making it harder for me to distinguish which I like more.” Val rambles making you chuckle.

“Go with your heart! Just continue chatting to both and I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” You say and she nods.

“I think I’m liking Danny more.” Jazmin says and shrugs.

Right after she was done talking you noticed all the guys got up from the firepit and began to disperse. Three were on their way to the swing while the other four went to the kitchen.

“Oh they must be up to something.” MJ mutters and watched as the three amigos walk towards you guys.

“Wouldn’t be surprising.” Gwen jokes making Val chuckle.

“With Peter B too, it might be over for us.” She says under her breath and they finally come up the steps.

“Y/n would you like the grand tour of the place?” Raul asks and you nod.

“Of course! Can’t say no to that.” You exclaim and get up.

He sticks his arm out for you as Peter B looks to be the second tour guide with Miguel behind him looking nervous.

Uh oh.

“Dana can we go for a chat?” He asks and she eagerly nods.

She quickly stood up and attached herself to him as they made their way to the daybeds.

Jazmin and Val walked off to the kitchen and the rest of you were looking at Dana and Miguel sitting on the daybed. “Well that’s going to be the reason for world war three.” Peter B jokes making you stifle a laugh back.

Too soon.

“Peter!” MJ hisses and he shrugs.

“Just being honest.” He mutters then looks away from them and looks to you, “well we owe you a tour.”

“That you guys do.” You say finally getting up and linking your arm to Raul’s.

“Are you guys gonna join?” He asks and the girls hum.

“It might be a good idea…” MJ mutters and Peter B was about to crack a joke but she stopped him, “don’t even think about it.”

“Yes ma’am.” He says sarcastically then chuckles.

“Alright let’s go!” He yells and wraps an arm around MJ as you all head over to the kitchen.

Dana is hearing wedding bells any time she looks at Miguel, he on the other hand looks like he’s preparing a restraining order! How poetic.

Miguel led Dana to the daybed that was on the right side, he sat down first then scooted over so she could sit next to him.

She plopped down next to him and he was already feeling so guilty. He felt even worse because he really was prepping for this very conversation before the date but now it’s just looking like he’s jumping ship because of the date which really wasn’t the case.

“So… how was the date?” She asks through gritted teeth and he turns his body to look at her.

Her blue eyes filled with worry and her hands slightly shaking just made it ten times worse.

“It was a good date, I did enjoy it but first I want to be honest with you about my feelings overall.” He starts and she slowly nods, not sure what to expect from him.

Her eyes were already getting glossy and she just had an overall bad feeling about this. Her intuition was rarely wrong and right now she wasn’t feeling too good about where this was going.

“I have been thinking a lot the past few days. Firstly I’d like to say that I was going to have this conversation with you after I was done talking to Peter B earlier but I got the text and then I wasn’t able to talk to you until right now-“ he rambled and she cut him off, “Just get to the point!”

“Right... So I didn’t feel an immediate spark with you and I thought it’d be one of those things where maybe it’ll grow after a few days so I gave it a few days to get to know you better and see if I would feel it.” He says and takes a deep breath.

Her lip started to quiver and she already felt her whole future come crashing down in front of her eyes.

“I didn’t feel it. I feel so bad about it because you’re such an amazing girl and I’ve had such a good time talking to you, getting to know you, and making you laugh. But I’m not feeling a romantic connection and it was time for me to not only be honest to you, but to myself as well because it’s not something that can be forced from either side.” He admits and she’s just sat silent.

She looks away from him, tears threatening to spill but she takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. She quickly wipes under her eyes with her left hand then takes another deep breath before turning to him.

“Fuck.. I really didn’t expect to hear this from you.. at all.” She mutters and gulps.

“I know I’m so sorry. I didn't think things would turn out this way. I genuinely did love getting to know you but I just… didn’t feel it.” He says and she nods.

She quickly thinks of something to say and although she did feel a sting in her heart, she knew she couldn’t really blame him for it.

Sparks might not always come up and she had to accept that one way or another.

“Well thank you for being honest, I can’t say I’m happy about it obviously… but I appreciate the honesty and hope you do find someone.” She says and gives him the smallest of smiles.

“I know you’ll find someone who’ll give you all the iced coffees and sarcasm you could ever ask for.” He says and she chuckles as a singular tear falls down her cheek quickly.

“I sure hope so.” She whispers and wipes the tear away then fixes her hair.

She stands up and he quickly follows suit, “Friends?” He asks and opens his arms wide.

“Friends.” She says and accepts his hug.

What would now probably be the last one ever and she can’t believe it. She could tell from his eyes that everything he said was true. Especially how he looked almost panicked when he said he wanted to have the conversation before he got the text.

She probably would’ve believed him nonetheless because there have been signs the past two days. Signs that she swore would just go away or a part of her imagination, but they weren’t.

Like how he didn’t cuddle her in bed. Or how he never tried to kiss her outside of a challenge (which she was always waiting on).

The good thing was he definitely was trying with her because he didn’t get to know any other girl so that counts for something.

They both pulled away and he gave her a small smile. “If you want I could leave you the bed, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything. You could have your space.”

She hums and shrugs, “Hmm I’m not sure.. ask me later and I’ll decide then.”

He nods and they both walk together for a few seconds but Miguel heads to the firepit while she goes on to go to the kitchen to talk to her girls.

Never been so gutted a couple split up before….. well let’s move on to new girl Y/n getting a grand tour of her new home!

“Obviously up first has to be the kitchen! Drama free, filled with delicious food, and underrated part of the villa to have a chat.” Peter B says and gasps at seeing an opened bag of Lays chips.

He grabs a handful then throws half in his mouth, “Tho now we cun go inthide.”

“What?” You laugh and shake your head.

“Babe, manners please.” MJ pleads, making him roll his eyes.

He swallows and leads the way to go inside, “tough crowd.”

You giggle and Gwen whispers to you, “he is the definition of a goofball.”

“I can tell.” You whisper back making her giggle.

He opens the door for you all and you’ve already seen the beds but now you looked at the neon lights on each side of the room. They illuminated the room a bit more and Raul let you go so you could walk around a bit.

“It’s so much prettier in person.” You say and Gwen quickly agrees.

“We fell in love as soon as we walked through the doors.” She says with a chuckle.

“You’ll get use to the bright light soon enough.” She adds and you nod.

“Ooooh Y/n your bed is already ready.” Peter says and points to the corner bed.

“Oh fuck yes!!” You scream and run towards it then jump on it.

At this point you were more or so dry, so you didn’t hesitate.

It was so soft and was luckily like a cloud. Good thing it’d help the back problems and you’ll get to sleep like a baby.

“A bed all to yourself huh?” Raul says and you flip to look at them.

“Just for the night but better believe I’m gonna enjoy it.” You say and sigh, just letting yourself sink into the bed.

“Alright, alright let’s get going.” Peter says and you pout but get up anyway.

“Are you on a schedule?” You joke and he playfully nods.

“I am so if you don’t mind and keep your hands in the ride.” He says and pretends to point to a file line.

You laugh and walk over to them, now Raul opening the door for everyone while you walk to the main entrance.

Peter takes a right and you follow suit, now walking into the lounge room. There were a few couches with brightly colored pillows on them, plants, more neon light signs, a coffee table, and cute bunny chairs.

It was a cute little hangout spot and right behind the couches was the doghouse.

“I feel like my boy Mig might be sleeping here tonight.” Peter says earning himself a smack on the arm by MJ.

“WHA—!“

“Don’t say stuff like that Pete!” She says in a hushed tone and he waves her off.

“Okay listen most of us already knew it was coming so it’s like… getting used to the idea.” He explains and she just raises a brow.

“We’re gonna have to work on your big mouth.” She playfully jokes, making him groan.

He wraps his arm around her waist, pulling her close to him then kisses her cheek.

He then points to the door that was straight ahead “This is the hideaway which you already knew but you’ve been one of the first to see!” He says and you chuckle.

“Wasn’t really paying too much attention to the actual room…” you say, earning yourself a gasp from him.

“Naughty.” He mutters then lightly elbows your side.

“Oh my god not like that-“

“Yeah yeah sure.” He cuts you off and leads you all to the stairs.

“Let’s keep it going before I feel the need to puke.” He jokes, making you groan.

“Ladies first.” He says, letting go of MJ.

She lets you go first and you’re grateful because this bikini was starting to feel tight and didn’t want to give either guy a free show.

You carefully go up all the stairs and MJ points to the left. You both head their first but Peter catches up to you and just shakes his head. “It’s the beach hut, you’ll be called in before and after challenges, after a date, and all throughout the day.” He explains and you nod.

You do a 360 and Peter leads you straight ahead. You turn to your right and there was the bathroom. You could peek through from the little hallway and see the showers and all types of products on the left and right side of the walls.

Peter ushers you to go in and you do. You walk in and there was a huge mirror against the wall as soon as you walk in and to the right is a bathtub sandwiched between two sinks.

Across from the sinks were two showers and a door to the left of them. “The toilet.” Peter says and you turn to look at him with wide eyes.

“Toilet? As in singular?” You ask, completely stunned.

“Unfortunately.” Gwen groans and you gasp.

“That’s- that’s fucking insane.” You gasp then wince at the thought of having to share a toliet with men who might not know how to aim correctly.

“Well sometimes they occasionally let us use the hideaway bathroom. On rare occasions…” Raul says and you nearly let out a cry.

“Listen, we all get used to it and swear it’s not that bad.” Peter says then lets out a burp.

“Give me a second.” He says and opens said door to utilize it.

One of your eyes twitches and the girls unfortunately don’t have anything to say that’ll make you feel better. It’s been hell.

“Can’t even say it’ll get better girls?” You ask nervously and it was crickets.

“I’m not gonna name any names but some of the guys apparently just don’t know how to piss.” Gwen says with a gag.

“This is probably the worst revelation to all mankind.” You say and shake your head.

“Hope you’re not a night owl either because out here you’re gonna be an early bird.” Raul says and you gasp.

“Y’know what guys I think I can make tinder work…” you half joke and pretend to walk off.

But then you look at the second mirror that was next to some face and hair products on the wall. You fix some stray hairs and your bikini top when you hear a flush.

You look behind you and Peter walks directly to the sink. Everyone looked at him, just patiently waiting while he made sure to wash his hands for a solid minute.

He dries his hands with a small towel then claps his hands, “alright let’s go.”

He took a right and after a few steps you were inside the dressing room. It was somehow the brightest room in the whole villa but it made perfect sense since this was where the girls would do their hair and makeup.

“Oh my god-“ you say and take it in.

In the middle was a big circle table with small chairs below them, and on top were mirrors, hair curlers, Dyson airwraps, and makeup scattered all over it. “Sorry we didn’t clean up our mess..” Gwen chuckles and you wave her off.

“Understandable.”

To the left side were drawers and cabinets of just makeup and hair products.

To the right side was the closet where some of the sliding doors were slightly open which showed how filled of clothes they were. The best part was that the doors were all mirrors, and took up two walls so it was perfect for group selfies or just checking out how your fit looks without bothering someone else.

You walked a step to where there were makeup products, probably from sponsors that production will make you wear, and open two different drawers. One was filled with lip liners and the other with lip sticks.

“This might just be heaven.” You mumble making the girls giggle.

“You’re gonna blend in fine girl.” MJ says, now stood to you and held your hand.

“I hope so! Not sure I’d be able to deal with awkwardness too well though.” You joke and Peter just scoffs.

“I think you dealt with awkwardness just fine earlier. With pure grace if you will.” He says and you shrug.

“Thought I was going to get eaten alive with that girl's chat.” You joke and fake shiver.

“Oh my god you haven’t even seen the best part.” Gwen gasps and grabs your other hand, spinning you to follow her along with MJ, who didn’t let go.

Gwen opens the door to the terrace and the sun has now set, it was pitch black until you walked out and got to the couches and saw the beautiful fairy lights illuminating the garden.

You had a view of the entire garden, besides the kitchen because it was right below the terrace. You saw a few of the guys on the firepit and could barely see the girls by the beanbags which was right by the long pool.

“Wow.” Was all you could manage to think of.

“It’s even more beautiful in the mornings!” MJ excitedly says and you sigh.

Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad.

You sit on the cushioned sofa to look over at the garden before facing them and seeing a cute coffee table in the middle of all the little sofas. There were plants by the walls next to the door and you were stunned by how pretty and surreal the villa looked.

“On second thought I might stick around for a while…” you joke making them chuckle.

Suddenly you heard noises below you and your eyes lit up, “can I finally shower?”

“You gotta go beat everyone else!” Peter exclaims and you get up and run as fast as you can inside.

Luckily your suitcase was in the dressing room so you quickly put it down and opened it, quickly scrambling to find a pair of undies and some pj’s.

Today must’ve been your lucky day because your cute pjs sets were right on top and found your underwear to be on a side pocket. You chose a random one and sprinted to the bathroom as the rest of the islanders went inside to get ready to go to sleep.

As you quickly hopped in to one of the two showers, the three other girls were coming up the stairs and the guys were in the bedroom getting undressed.

At this point Miguel had had his chat with Dana and spilled the beans with the guys. Dana had done the same, or at least tried to because she started to sob before getting a single word in.

Raul and Peter went downstairs as the girls went into the dressing room and Dana’s smeared makeup was not a good sign so they sprinted downstairs to know what happened.

“What happened?!?” Peter yells as they walked into the bedroom and Raul quickly closed the door.

“I ripped the bandaid off.” Miguel responds then sighs.

“She took it better than I thought, at least in front of me she did.” He said sadly and Peter frowns, walking up to him.

He gives him a bear hug and pats him on the back as Miguel hugged him back. “You had to do it. You weren’t feeling it and there was no point in letting her fall in love with you while you didn’t feel jack shit.” He says bluntly making a few of the guys murmur.

“Brutal.”

“When it comes to love, you have to be.” He quickly says and it sounded much deeper than he wanted.

And coming from him was just something else.

“You’re here for you alright? Don’t forget that.” He says and lets him go.

Raul then steps him and gives him a shorter hug, “he’s got a point, we’re all here to find love so it’s only fair you’re true to yourself.”

“Thanks guys.” Miguel chuckles as Raul pats his back.

“Alright well I think I have to hit the showers.” He says but Peter makes a face.

“Y/n’s up there right now, maybe wait a bit so it won’t look a type of way.” He advises and Miguel nods.

“That’s fine by me.”

After you had finished your shower now feeling all clean and refreshed in your cute pj set, you only caught Jordan brushing his teeth.

“Oh here are the toothbrushes by the way!” He says and pulls a little bin under the sink to show you sealed toothbrushes.

“Thank you!” You exclaim and grab a red one.

“After you’re done most of us put them in these little tube boxes and you just write your initials on it, and then put it in your own cabinet over there.” He shows you another bin with the boxes and pointed to the drawers on the sides of the wall.

“It’ll take some time to get use to but you’ll catch on quick.” He adds and you nod.

“Thanks.” You say and open the toothbrush then throw the packaging in the garbage below the sink.

“Gonna have to assume the toothpaste is….” You guess a random bin next to the tootheburshes and of course, there they were.

“See you’re catching on already.” He teases making you chuckle.

You open up the tube and put a dollop on your toothbrush when you see a shirtless torso walking by through the opening on the wall. You follow it then look away once they’re in the bathroom. You brush your teeth looking at the mirror and the shirtless torso made an appearance behind you, it belongs to none other than Miguel.

You check him out in the mirror and you were just admiring his biceps as he grabbed a towel and put it on the rack by that shower. You shook your head and spit into the sink before quickly finishing up.

You take another looks at the bins to find one with floss and it only took two tries to find it. You took out a decent amount before flossing your teeth, getting closer to the mirror so you could see better. At that point Jordan had left and you were alone besides Miguel, who was in the shower.

You threw the floss into the garbage and were wondering what they used to write on the boxes. You bit your lip and wondered if there were sharpies or something around.

Then an idea clicked and you put your wet toothbrush into the box before walking over to the empty dressing room and going through the drawers until you found eyeliner. You wrote your initials in cursive just to be a little extra.

You put the eyeliner back into the drawer then closed it before walking back into the bathroom. You grabbed all your things and opened drawers until you found an ideal one to put them in.

Just then the water turned off and that was your cue to leave because you didn’t know if you could handle shirtless wet Miguel at that moment.

So you saw yourself out and went downstairs and into the bedroom where everyone was on each others beds, Gwen was racing Peter B from jumping to bed to bed. You closed the door and shook your head in disbelief.

You covered your mouth as Peter nearly knocked over the second Peter, who didn’t see him coming.

“Bro move!!” Peter B yelled and Peter gave him a scoff.

You walked to your bed and sat on the edge so they could still finish their race.

Gwen was beating him by two beds and with her fast speed she beat him by a landslide. MJ clapped for Gwen which prompted Peter B to give her a playful glare before he sprinted towards her like a bull.

He then began tickling her and she immediately started yelling for him to stop but that devious look on his face did not look like he was going to stop anytime soon.

You looked at the bed next to you and it was Jordan and Jazmin’s. Jordan was already snuggled to the blankets but Jazmin was in Dana’s bed.

Then as if remembering something Dana got up and walked out, going upstairs. She went directly to the bathroom and Miguel was coming out of the shower.

Droplets were dripping down his body and she had to remind herself to stay focused. “You can sleep in our bed, it’s absolutely fine.”

“Are you sure?” He asks as he dries his hair with a towel and she nods.

“Yes.”

Meanwhile Peter B made his way to your bed and was giving you a fat ass hug while saying, “I hope your first night was good.”

“Honestly was better than I expected.” You said and hugged him back.

It felt as if you had been friends for years. He was so laidback with a good amount of playfulness and goofiness, you didn’t even mind the gesture.

That was until MJ and Raul followed his lead and jumped on top of you, making you both fall back onto your mattress. “Fuck-“ you groaned and felt Raul’s body weight on you.

“Get your fat ass off the poor girl Raul.” You hear a voice say as you fake groaned some more.

He was then off you thinking they were real and you gave him a laugh when he realized you were playing. He was about to pounce on you again when Miguel held him back, “let her be man, come on it’s her first night.”

Raul shrugs and goes in for a normal hug which you accept, “Buenas noches, duerme con los angelitos hermosa.” He whispers in your ear and you felt a shiver go down your spine. (Goodnight, sleep with the little angels gorgeous)

Damn.

“Igualmente.” You whisper back and he pulls away with a grin. (Likewise)

MJ then hugs you and pulls away with Peter B giving you yet another hug. He pulls away and they went on to their own bed.

You then notice Miguel leaning against Jordan and Jazmin’s bed, just looking at you. “What did you want me to tuck you in?” You joke and he chuckles.

“I wouldn’t mind that.” He jokes back making you laugh.

“But I’m luckily not in the doghouse tonight.” He says and you chuckle.

“Good for you!” You say and he shrugs.

“Still feels bad.” He mumbles and you nod.

“Obviously it would but you did what you had to do!” You whisper and he nods.

He then gets up and sits next to you before leaning in, “Thank you for an amazing first date. Espero que hayan más en nuestro futuro.” (I hope there’s more in our future)

“Me gustaría eso.” You whisper back and he tried to hide his smile back. (I’d like that)

“Goodnight, sweet dreams.” He says and hugs you.

You hug him back and feeling his arms around you just felt so.. right. You felt safe and it was sending loads of butterflies to your stomach.

He pulls away and you whisper, “goodnight.”

He smiles and gets up before making his way to his and Dana’s bed which was by the middle of the room.

You now got into bed as all the other couples, and two singletons, got comfortable in their own beds.

All the lights turned off and you turned to your ideal spot to sleep in then pulled the covers over you.

“Goodnight Y/n!!” Peter B’s voice yelled and it was followed by the same from all the islanders.

“GOODNIGHT!”

“Night pretty.”

“Sleep well Y/n!”

“Goodnighttttt.”

You yelled a loud goodnight to them all then closed your eyes and quickly drifted off to sleep, completely oblivious to a handful of noisy couples and individuals snoring their heads off.

[sentientcave]

WAIT WAIT WAIT i need to hear about the 141 paranormal investigators omg???

OKAY SO

Basically it's like, a non-military AU where they have a youtube channel and investigate haunted places and look for cryptids and junk. Ghost is the camera/editing guy, Gaz and Johnny handle social media and are the primary faces, and John is a professor of Mythology and Folklore on extended leave that became a permanent fixture after they interviewed him too many times. They're on an American road trip, and they chance upon a hidden town full of actual supernatural people and creatures. Cue shenanigans while the townspeople try not to get caught on camera. Also they meet a hot witch who runs the B&B (the only place to stay in town).

Here's some of all this silliness:

“Relax, Soap.” Price used his stern teaching voice, the one that could command a rowdy hall of college students (most of whom were only taking his class because they thought it would be an easy credit) to be quiet and pay attention. “If we get lost you’ll get to gloat about bein’ right, how about that?”

“Rather no’ get lost, but Ah suppose it’ll do.”

Simon and Gaz exchanged a look, both of them trying not to laugh. They were an odd bunch, by any metric. Gaz had started a youtube channel reviewing local businesses around Manchester while he was attending university, which is where he had met Simon (Or Ghost, as he had introduced himself back then), who had been the butcher at a shop Gaz wanted to review. Ghost had been told to give Gaz a tour, so he had, reluctantly, and Gaz had gone home later that week to find Ghost sitting in front of his computer, editing the video.

“You do shite work,” he’d said, the only explanation he had offered for his presence in Ga’s apartment. “Fine substance, but terrible camera an’ editin’.”

And well, Ghost’s video had done a lot better than any of Gaz’s previous ones, so he’d asked him to continue. Ghost suggested moving on to different content as well, to exploring some of the spookier sites around Manchester (Of which Ghost seemed to be intimately familiar, unnervingly enough), and they had interviewed Price a few times to give the videos an air of legitimacy, since he was a professor of mythology and folklore at Gaz’s university.

Johnny had been their missing link, however. They’d gone to do a video in Glasgow, and kept running into him everywhere they went. He’d provided some useful local knowledge, and had a channel of his own, where he mostly blew stuff up and did parkour around the city. The Glasgow videos all went viral, and the channel suddenly became something they could potentially throw themselves into doing on a more full time basis.

Price, chafing at the routine of teaching, asked to join them on a more permanent basis as well. And since he had the two things that the rest of them lacked (A car and a savings account), they agreed. That had been four years ago. And somehow, it was working. They weren’t exactly making a lot of money, but they were getting by, and Price had written and published two new books, using their travel and research to pad out what might have otherwise been dry, academic work.

Simon flicked the radio back on, the van filling with the sharp sound of static. They’d lost their last station somewhere along the drive. He fiddled with the tuner until an upbeat, overly patriotic country song came in clear.

Gaz made a disgruntled sound in the backseat. He’d made his disdain for country music clear somewhere back in California.

“Just tryin’ to get a traffic report. Untwist your knickers, Gaz.”

“If we’d stayed on the main road we’d no’ need a report.” Johnny could never stop himself from throwing in his two pence. “We’d be in it.”

Price reached over for the volume, and turned up the music, drowning them out as one song switched to the next.

[writerblue275]

Heartsteel Ezreal NSFW Alphabet (18+)

Inspiration: Listen...it's feral hours. Used the NSFW Alphabet template from @the-coldest-goodbye for this!

Champion: Heartsteel Ezreal

Genre: Headcanon

Type: NSFW AS FUCK. 18+ ONLY MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

Gender: Gender Neutral Reader!

TW: As I said. Smut as hell. Also cursing because I curse. Mention of various kinks. Very small mention of weapons in general.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Clingy but in a sweet way. Definitely very cuddly. If Ezreal’s not exhausted, he’ll go get water and a snack for both of you. Otherwise you’ll probably be leading most aftercare activities.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On him: A curveball, but his neck/throat. It’s extremely sensitive and so when you mark him there or nibble/nip, he really feels amazing.

On you: Your hands. Ez loves lacing his fingers with yours. He also loves feeling them tug on his hair and cover his mouth to keep him quiet.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Ezreal might be a little embarrassed to admit it, but he loves it when you make him finish on himself, like on his stomach. He adores how you kiss him and sweetly tease him about how much of a mess he made before you go get something to help clean him up.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Ez has recorded himself while jacking off and listened back to it a few times. Mostly out of curiosity.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

(Oooooh I’m going surprisingly back and forth on this)

Do I think Ezreal is the most experienced in Heartsteel? Absolutely not. But considering he’s in the early prime of his life, I’d imagine he has at least some experience. He definitely knows enough to know what he’s doing.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Oooh. Absolutely any position with you on top. Those positions drive Ezreal wild in the very best possible way. Especially if it’s a position where he can look up and watch you. He loves watching you take your pleasure.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It really depends on the context of the situation. Ez can certainly make you giggle and smile if the general vibe is on the playful or light-hearted side. Though he’s also incredibly earnest and sincere in his goal to pleasure you, and that can sometimes make him surprisingly serious if the vibe is more romantic.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Considering Ez’s hair is GREEN…no the carpet does not match the damn drapes 😂. He’s blonde down there and he keeps things very tidy.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Ezreal can be romantic as fuck. Like if that’s what the mood calls for, he’s saying the most romantic things to you because he wants to really make sure you know how much he is head over heels for you. He’s lacing his hands with yours. He’s keeping eye contact because your expressions are the most attractive thing in the world to him. He’s saying “I love you” a LOT. Like he can make a moment really really intimate.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

If you can’t be there, like he’s on tour or something and he can’t call you, then yeah Ez will get things done himself. But it’s definitely not his preference. Not when you love him so well.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Hehe here we go: PRAISE. KINK. (Ezreal’s receiving love language is words of affirmation so it tracks.) Loves being tied up or blindfolded. Like a lot. Sensory play in general (like using ice cubes or candle wax). Can also see him being a fan of semi-public sex. Like dressing room before/after a show or something like that. So that could be classified as very very slight exhibitionism

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Generally Ez’s favorite location is at your place because then he can be louder and doesn’t have to hold back his reactions as much. But see above, he’s not opposed to semi-public places either.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

To be totally honest it doesn’t take much to get Ezreal going. Seeing you in a nice outfit or if he’s in close proximity to you are some things. And he definitely has a Pavlovian-esque response to any signature scent you wear (especially if it’s the same scent you wore the first time the two of you were intimate together).

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything involving weapons. He’d be too nervous he’d accidentally hurt you. And I can’t really see Ez using degrading language with you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Of course Ez loves to receive head from you, but this man lives to give you oral. He loves feeling your fingers tangle in and tug on his long hair. He loves listening to you praise him (because he’s very very talented with that mouth ot his). He loves being able to pleasure you in this way.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Again it really depends on the situation. If it’s a quickie backstage then the adrenaline is pumping and things are pretty fast and frantic. A super romantic date night? Definitely on the slow and sensual side. “Normal” day-to-day experiences are somewhere in the middle.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Big fan. The adrenaline rush from a quickie is something Ezreal enjoys. BUT he definitely also appreciates the moments where you two can take your time together and be thorough.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Ez is definitely down to try new things. Like obviously he has hard boundaries (such as no weapons) but anything that is within his hard boundaries he’s game to try.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Mmmmmm 2 rounds is the max like 95% of the time. Occasionally 3 if he’s really worked up. If it’s not a quickie then usually Ez lasts somewhere in the ballpark of 15 minutes per round, though usually that time gets shorter the more rounds he goes.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Oh ABSOLUTELY. Ez absolutely has toys and will use them on himself, though even more so, he appreciates when you use them on him. He is also happy to let you use whatever he has and will absolutely use them on you, especially in the rare moments he takes the lead.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

While I think in general Ezreal is extremely teasing, when it comes to the bedroom, he likes to be the one being teased, not the other way around. Go for it. Tease him. He might whimper or let out a soft noise of complaint at how unfair you’re being, but he actually really enjoys it. You have the evidence right in front of you. 😉

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

If you want/need him to be quiet, you’ll have to gag him with something. Ez is generally loud and it’s almost like he can’t help it. Moans, whimpers, whines, he does it all.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Ezreal is a big fan of phone/facetime sex. He loves hearing you guide him and he loves guiding you and visualizing/seeing what you’re doing. The fact he can still make you feel good even when he’s not physically with you is something he really likes.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

5.5-6”-ish inches. Absolutely nothing to scoff at. Decently thick. What Ez has he definitely uses to both his advantage and yours (he’s got those dancer hips y’all…. 😏).

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Fairly high. As previously said, it really doesn’t take much to get Ezreal going.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Depends on how many rounds. One round? Ezreal will be up for a little bit afterwards and he’s cuddling you and being very sweet. More than one? Oh he’s basically out like a fucking light switch.

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed! This was very fun to do. Should I do these for the other Heartsteel members? I think I might need to. 😏💙

[didyoulookforme]

(not quite) sfw alphabet: cute & soft matty healy x fem reader

oh, hello hi! seems like many of you enjoyed the nsfw alphabet so i thought i would try and do the (mostly) sfw version to give lovely soft matty some sort of backstory.

again, in my dream world this bf matty is a shy romantic horny opinionated man who is mostly a sub.

nothing super unique, just mostly here for the soft matty vibes because we all deserve one of those. that and i've been in my fluffy feels these past few days.

warning: 18+, some smutty mentions. grammatical errors, typos. this doesn't really follow a timeline, so let's suspend reality here.

matty healy masterlist here

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a = affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

towards his friends: he will give them a hug here and there, but he usually reserves those for very special occasions (eg. birthdays or record launches) or if someone is clearly upset.

towards you: he will shower you with affection whenever he can without being too overbearing in public (unless he's had too much to drink hehe. he will cling to you like a leech then.) hugs, kisses on top of your head, holding hands. he likes cute signs of affection while you're out and about. now, if you're alone, he will hold you for as long as he can. think cuddles on the couch, limbs all intertwined, your bodies melting into each other, him almost begging for you to please play with his hair because he loves the feeling of your nails against his scalp. he will listen to you ramble on about whatever happened at work, pretending like he's following along but half of the time he can't keep up because you talk 10 miles per second. he knows that your favourite flowers are tulips, so every spring he will make sure the vase on your bedside table is full of them, and if he's on tour, he'll arrange for you get a special delivery of the yellowish orange ones you love so you don't dare forget about him. not that you ever would <3

b = best friend (what would they be like as a best friend? how would the friendship start?)

lucky for you (and not in a sarcastic way), matty's been your best friend since year 9 when you became his tutor because him and numbers do not mix. you would stay with him after classes to try your best to help, but half of the time the two of you would end up getting distracted talking about random topics such as your favourite bands and gossip from school, or sneaking out to smoke (he’s the one who showed you how to do so). you found him intriguing since the beginning—you weren’t sure how someone so shy and soft spoken could be in a band and have a bunch of teenage girls lusting after him. he was quiet, sure, but very witty and funny once he got on chatting. he took an interest in you too, noticing how you’d try your best to keep the conversation going as he wasn’t an eloquent one with words. he appreciated that, your patience to actually keep him engaged and your eagerness to connect with him. even though the girls were after him and his bandmates at all times, he never really paid attention to them, thus the boys were in shock when he brought you over to practice one night. like, matthew bringing a girl to their sacred space, wtf? but handsome george did notice how matty played effortlessly and better when you were around so george would try and get you to come to practice every once in a while so they could get the best version of matthew possible.

as best friends, you were there for each other through it all (even through your arguments) because you just clicked so well. you knew everything about each other. every. single. little. thing. but as the band started to get bigger, it was difficult to find the time to hang out as he would be rather busy. you were always supportive, but you'd be lying if you didn't miss having your friend around and being able to see him whenever you pleased. it wasn't the same just seeing photos of him pop up on the internet or get texts from him whenever he could find the time. however, when we would come back, you picked up as if nothing had ever changed. and it is always hard to believe that after 15-16 years of friendship, you'd finally get over yourselves and actually try to see if you could work out romantically. which you do :)

c = cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

"can i have a cuddle?" is probably one of the things he says the most to you. he loves loves loves to snuggle, but just with you though. he enjoys the company and the warmth of having you close to him when possible. it makes him feel safe. his favourite is when he gets to cuddle you after you wake up, just heavy limbs around each other while lazily kissing your lips. there's been times when he's been sad about something and you're not there, so george will tease him (do you need a cuddle, sweetheart?), but the good friend that he is, he will actually spend some time with him, an arm around matty's shoulders trying to cheer him up. it does the trick most of the time.

d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they at cooking and cleaning?)

my boy here calls in the movers (eg. george and ross) the second you accept to move in with him. matty is over the moon that he will get to wake up pressed against your naked body every morning, that he will get to see you wear his clothes when you make your daily cup of tea, that he will come home to you and mayhem cuddled on his sofa after a long day at the studio. he's been dreaming of this moment for quite a while and when it does happen, he's thankful to everything that is holy that you like him enough to deal with him on a daily basis.

which, you do have to deal with his messes because he is not the neatest person. he's not that bad but you have to pick up after him when he gets distracted because he's already probably making a slight mess elsewhere. think shirts over chairs, empty mugs on surfaces, socks by the sofa, towels on the bathroom floor, a stack of open books on the desk, etc etc. again, not bad really, just a quirk of his. however, you don't mind it at all as he's a mean cook in the kitchen. matty will treat you to a three course french gourmet dinner any evening (plus some sex as an extra dessert).

e = ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

oh god... he thinks the world of you and wants you to be the happiest ever so if at some point he feels like you'd be better off without him, he'd heartbreakingly let you go, letting you know that he will always be there for you. if it were to happen, there would be endless tears and so much pain due to the loss of your relationship. but you would eventually be friends again, maybe not as close as before, but you've shared so much together to not be a part of each other's lives in some way, shape or form. ugh. too much for my heart to handle. don't make me even though i secretly love angst.

f = fiance (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

on the same vein as above, commitment often scares him but not because he's afraid of spending the rest of his life with you, but mostly because he's weary of not being enough or giving you what you deserve. he's also not really sure if he's the marriage type of guy, thinking that it's mostly a label and what would actually change if you did get married (other than having fancy rings?). but that was until that one time when you got a piece of mail and, for some reason instead of it having your surname, it had his attached to your name. this made him feel some sort of way as his heart started to race and his hands got all clammy, the name being repeated inside his head over and over again. huh. it didn't sound half bad, did it? that stayed with him for weeks on end, until one night, when you were all at a bar with friends and someone asked the both of you that annoying "do you think you'll get married?" question. you were about to answer, but were surprised when matty beat you to it, "i think i could see myself settling down." he looked at you with apprehensive eyes, knowing that he had never voiced any interest in marriage out loud and was nervous of what you'd say. but you responded with a blush on your face and a soft "yeah, maybe" while you grabbed his hand under the table and gave it a tight squeeze which he returned. <3

g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

he's the most gentle boy you could ever imagine, you couldn't have dreamt him up even in your wildest dreams. i guess that's partly due to his shy, soft demeanour. he's always been that way as far as you can remember. well, to you at least. he can be snarky with his other close friends if deeply provoked, but it still takes a lot to get him to that point. but yes with you, he'll do everything in his power to make you feel at ease. if you're anxious or sad, he will listen to you and hold near you while you cry (and let you take out his frustrations out on him). if you're in pain, he will comfort you, wishing he could take the hurt away (and this is where period sex comes in because he knows it will make you feel better...)

h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

he loves them. cannot get enough of them. each time he sees you he has to wrap his arms around you and bring you as close to him as humanly possible to breathe in your scent. BUT that's only after you started dating. prior to that, yes, he would hug you but tbh it was very hard on him as he was (very obviously) pining for you. before you were official, it would take all of his strength to not keep holding on to you but he knew that if he did it for too long, then his heart wouldn't be able to take it. this boy NEEDED YOU for him to be complete. poor matty. however, now that the both of you are an item, he hurries to wrap his arms around your waist each time he greets you, drawing soft, gentle circles on your back as he kisses the top of your head. he's a precious one.

i = i love you (how fast do they say the l-word?)

the thing is that, even before you confessed you liked each other, matty already knew he loved you so it was very difficult for him to not say it right away. you might be surprised because, well, it's shy subby matty we're talking about here, but he was actually the one who said it first a few months after you were dating. not entirely sure of the situation (as this could be a blurb on it's own because who doesn't love a fluffy 'i love you' story) but when he did say those three words, it took you a minute to realize you weren't dreaming that even sweetheart matty got very nervous and begged you to "please, say something" as he grabbed and kissed your hand. it wasn't until you finally came back to reality and the ringing in your ears stopped, that you said it back to him. and there was a lot of kissing and passionate sex after lol.

j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?)

sweet matty tries to pretend like he NEVER get jealous, but it's so darn obvious when it happens that it's actually endearing (most of the time, at least). he won't really get mad at you per se as you are not really the flirty type, but what triggers him is when other guys try to touch you in a suggestive type of way (eg. when a hand lingers on your arm for too long or someone wraps their arm around your lower back). you can tell he is jealous because his nervous tendencies become apparent, like the rapid tapping of his foot or running his hands through his hair nonstop. but if he gets really, REALLY jealous, then his small but possessive side will show, going to interrupt whatever inappropriate interaction is taking place. when this happened the first time, you were taken aback as to how suave he was when he put a hand on your ass and pulled you close to him, continuing on to interrogate the other guy who was trying to get in your pants.

an interesting time was when you (drunkenly) admitted that you once made out with ross backstage (pre-dating him). matty about went and drove to his house to give him a piece of his mind but he ended up just sitting on the couch acting all upset that one of his friends got to kiss you before him. the next day you got a text from ross "hey. is matty alright? he keeps looking at me like i just kicked a baby kitten..."

k = kisses (what are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

75% of the time they're sweet and gentle with the other 25% being needy, sloppy (in a good way), and breathtaking (literally). he's one of those that will have his sleeves over his hands as he cups your face and sweetly kisses you, cutely grinning against your lips and whispering endless i love you's. or he'll place his arms on your shoulders and wrap them around your neck, bringing you as close as possible to kiss you as if this is the last time he will ever have you, all while countless moans and whimpers spill onto your lips (<- this will usually happen when he's very very turned on).

this man loves to kiss your hands, too. he loves to kiss them as often as he can. whether it is when he firsts sees you, or when you are in a date, or when you’re holding his face.

and for him, kiss that spot under his ear where the jaw meets his neck and he will melt. every. single. time. if you do it while pulling on his hair? that's it. you will have him at your mercy to do whatever you require (not that he really needs any convincing).

l = little ones (how are they around children?)

seeing him around children is one of the most endearing yet hilarious sights ever. he treats them as if they were already adults. he'll have conversations with then about topics that no child should be discussing (eg. the film he just watched or the state of the world). but his favourite is making them listen to music he likes because he wants to be the cool uncle / friend / individual in this child's life and introduce them to good music early on.

you haven't necessarily discussed having children, but every now and then you'll catch him say "when i have a kid, they will..." or "my kid would be / do..." which makes it fairly obvious that at some point he does want to have a family of his own.

m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

you usually end up waking up first, but you'll be sure to cuddle with him prior to actually getting up for bed. that or having morning sex because that never hurt anyone, did it? unless you have something to get to, as then you'd for sure be late for it because, as we know, quickies aren't a thing for either of you. ANYWAY. a perfect morning for the two of you is a lazy one, really. not having much obligation nor having to think about what the day holds ahead. there are times when you'll just spend a couple of hours cuddled up watching your fav show—matthew would probably end up passing out again. or sometimes you'll be out n about doing some grocery shopping while matty tries his darnest to pick up after his messes only to end up being distracted by a song idea, his puppy, or browsing ebay for some new art to buy.

if you for some reason do have to get up super early, you better be sure there are 5 or 20 alarms set as the two of you combined can set the record for the most snooze hits in an hour.

n = night (how are nights spent with them?)

when you finally live at matty's, you get into your ritual of making sure you eat dinner together when he's around. it's filled with him cooking up the new recipe he just found, sharing a bottle of red wine, listening to some of your fav records, a cute cozy endeavour. there's an unspoken understanding that this is the time when you catch up each other on how your days went.

every now and then, you'll take a bath right before bed and he will come in and sit on the chair besides the tub, reading you a few pages of your book outloud. you may have sex, but even if that doesn't happen, you'll always kiss each other softly for a few minutes before calling it a night. he then passes out stat.

when he's away on tour and if there's nowhere to be after a show, you can expect that he'll be in his bunk or at the back of the bus texting or facetiming you depending on the time zone. if it's a very late video call, it's mostly a silent conversation while you look at each other, sometimes quietly sobbing because you miss each other so.

o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

this is a slow endeavour for the both of you, not because you don’t trust each other (hell, you eventually become bffs), but because you are interested in each other romantically almost from the start and don’t want to ruin your friendship by divulging too much. at the beginning, you’d talk about common interests and what not. as you grew up you'd talk about your relationships trying not to be awkward about it. which btw, when you told matty you had lost your virginity he about passed out because a. you were having sex with someone who wasn't him, b. it sounds like the dude was fucking awful at it (you didn't spare the details mentioning that he didn't make you cum), and c. you were comfortable enough talking about your sex life with him which he secretly enjoyed as he got to take mental notes of what turned you on... just in the off chance he could have an opportunity with you... he mostly listened and nodded and shook his head. on the other hand, whenever he would talk about his dating and sex life with you, you'd question him about every single detail (you have no shame or filter), sometimes making him turn scarlett red because of the questions you ask (eg. what's are your kinks or how do you like to go down on a girl?)

p = patience (how easily angered are they?)

for the most part he's one patient human being. he has a pretty chill, calm demeanour in most aspects of his life (eg. the band, his friends, his family, you). he doesn't really believe in getting stressed out too much when things are out of his control, maybe it's all the weed too, though.

q = quizzes (how much would they remember about you? do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

when it comes to you, it's almost like he has a filing cabinet inside his head, filled with anything and everything in regards to you and your friendship / relationship with him. he's head-over-heels smitten that he remembers and notices the most random details about you: your favourite tea condiments (oat milk and honey), your favourite eye shadow colour (cobalt blue), your favourite kind of cat (orange tabby). he also remembers every single one of your exes and has noticed, funnily enough, that most of them tend to have brown curly hair…

r = remember (what is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

there have been so many memorable times spent with you, but one instance that often comes to his mind was after one of their first shows. everyone was over at his place. you all went outside behind the house to a beautiful green space leading up to a small creek, everyone sitting down by the edge of the water drinking the many beers and bottles of wine brought along. after a few hours, everyone (including yourself) was properly drunk and it was all bliss. you spent hours upon hours talking to all of them, hearing about their thoughts regarding the show they had just played, sharing their favourite bits from the set. it seemed simple, but knowing that you cared so much about him and the band meant the world to him. he remembers as everyone eventually started heading off to bed, but you didn't, you stayed behind to chat with him even though he could tell you were growing tired. and out of nowhere (probably due to the alcohol in his system) he asked you about a boy you had been seeing on and off. "how come you two aren't together?" "i guess i'm old fashioned and just want someone to myself and he doesn't. so i'm not really what he's after." "there’s nothing wrong with that. but i think he's an idiot for not being with you." you laughed it off casually, but he very clearly noticed as you slowly scooted closer to him until your legs were touching. again, it was a small gesture, but that was the first time when he felt that maybe, just maybe, there was something that could happen between the two of you. and god knows he wanted it because he had been dreaming of being with you so badly. however, it still took years to get there. all good things take time.

s = security (how protective are they? how would they protect you? how would they like to be protected?)

he's shy and soft, but he is oh so protective of you almost to a fault; he wants nothing bad to ever happen to you, physically or emotionally. he will defend you whenever someone says anything remotely bad about you. sometimes it's not even something overly malicious, but he can read into things too much when you're involved. like that one time a girl mocked you for your outfit. you honestly didn't think much of it (you agreed really, even if she was a bitch about it), but dear matty here wouldn't shut it as he was more offended than you. he means the best, though.

t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

oh god, the dates and anniversaries. he wants everything to be perfect that if something goes wrong, then that's one of the times when he'll actually get stressed out and flustered. he's got the dinner making down to a science (he knows your fav recipes by heart), he knows what you like for physical gifts (he has a list on notes app of things you mention in passing), but when it comes to scheduling events or making reservations... that doesn't come so easily to him lol. he has a horrid habit of leaving it until the last minute. that's probably why at the beginning of your relationship, the dates always (well, for the most part) end up being in your flat, with him making you dinner instead, which you honestly prefer that as it makes it for personal and romantic. after a few months, it becomes an unspoken agreement that you're the one that schedules any restaurant dinners or trips (and he's oh so grateful for it). you just tell him where and what time, and he'll be there with bells on, wearing his best bf matty outfit possible. you better bet that for one of your restaurant dates he'll pull out this number and you won't even want to finish dinner because you have to get back home and shag him. and when he wears this one for your one year anniversary, well, you end up renting a room at the closest hotel because there is no way in hell you're waiting to use that bow tie to have some fun.

u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)

he picks his nails and it drives you up the wall. you try to get him to stop but he always swats your hand away when you do so. he does it so often and doesn't even realize it. you've jokingly given him mittens every single year for his birthday as a (not so silent) plea for him to stop lol.

v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

it goes in phases with current bf matty. it mostly depends on his mood, really. there are times when he'll just choose from the pile of clothes he left on the floor throughout the week and that will suffice. but there are other days when he tries out about 7-8 different outfits until he lands on the right one for the occasion (mostly to impress you).

for some reason he has gotten into straightening his hair every now and then which made you throw a fit when you saw the photos on twitter while he was on tour. the thought of him frying up those beautiful curls of his made you tear up a bit but deep down you were like FUUUUUUUUUUCK ME UP DADDY you're gorgeous.

and don't get me started on the chain necklaces. if he wears those without a shirt on? you immediately have to excuse yourself and go scream into your arm because you cannot handle it. and he is well aware of this, which is probably why he does it in the first place. little minx.

w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

nope. even if he waited years and years you're the only person who would truly make him complete. and to be fair, everyone and their mum knew this was the case before either of you fully recognized it or did anything about it. he's like a lost puppy without you, even to the point that when he hears your name mentioned, he perks up looking to see / hear what is being said about you.

x = xtra (a random headcanon for them.)

he has one of those freaking electric scooters which he likes to ride everywhere, and he can be very annoying about it. you bet he's inside the concert arenas doing laps on this thing while the stage is being set up.

he will try to get you to ride with him even though you hate it as you feel like you're just gonna fall off and break your leg. but in reality, he gets you to ride along as an excuse for you to hold on to him, because he's too afraid / nervous to show physical affection towards you in many other ways.

once you start dating and he reveals this, you bow to never go on or near that thing ever again. but that same christmas he does gift you your own as a joke (well, not really tho) so you have to resign yourself to ride around with him, but not after getting yourself a helmet because the last thing you want is for your death certificate to read "cause of death: matty healy's scooter."

y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

some random things that he dislikes: sandals with socks, raw onion, cars honking, his old cranky neighbour, vaping, hann when he's trying to teach him a grownup lesson.

some things he doesn't like in a partner: when they chew loudly or when they lie. we're talking two very different ends of the spectrum here. make sure you never lie to him if you don't want to see him get truly mad...

z = zzz (what is a sleep habits of theirs?)

it's absolutely clear to every single person who knows bf matty that he LOVES his beauty sleep. he makes sure to take a short nap (almost) every day to give him some energy, cuddling up to mayhem and/or you if either are near him. during tour, everyone knows to not wake him up when he's in his bunk otherwise he'll be grumpy and a diva for the rest of the day. when he's not sleeping with you in his arms, he will lie on his stomach with his arms under the pillow and snooze away. he's also an underwear-only kind of guy when he goes to bed at night (or naked if he's just had sex with you).

--------

if you made it this far again, thank you for indulging me :)

let me know if there are any bits you'd like me to expand on. always more than happy to do so when it come to this matty (my dream boy, really).

[pilfappreciator]

ATTENTION TROLLS FANDOM!!

This is very important. Mostly to me but maybe you guys have been wondering this too idk but anyways:

How does troll reproduction work exactly?

Cuz I'm genuinely curious. I dont think anyone on the series production team has said anything and so far I've seen absolutely no one touch on this subject but as someone who's always had an interest in the habits of creatures (both fictional or otherwise), I kinda sorta maybe NEED to know this otherwise I'll never be able to sleep peacefully again

Full disclaimer that I'm specifically talking about the whole egg situation, I am NOT ASKING HOW THEY GET IT ON IF I WANTED THAT ANSWER I'D GO TO DEVIANT ART OR TWITTER OR WHATEVER LAWLESS PLATFORM GOD STEERS CLEAR OF. This discussion shall remain STRICTLY educational, thank you very much

But anywho. Let's dive in

So trolls come from eggs. This is basic knowledge. First instance of this phenomenon (as far as I know, I've only seen the movies) is from World Tour.

Egg pops out of Guy Diamond's hair, egg hatches and BOOM, (literal) baby. Now I understand that this whole sequence was probably just a gag and a way for DreamWorks to implement another (merchandisable) addition to the cast HOWEVER this sequence also raises a few questions

First off, as far as I know Guy Diamond has no partner (again: I haven't watched any of the spinoff shows). Either that or maybe the other troll was a sorta one-night-stand/no-longer-in-his-life kinda situation? Which is great either way cuz its shown he obviously cares for his son and we at Tumblr appreciate a loving single father no matter the circumstances, but if my former theory is correct than that would imply that trolls are capable of reproducing asexually. Like onions.

Now if that hypothesis is, as they call it, "cap" then that would mean that some sorta hanky panky has to go down before an egg comes into question. And if that's the case, does this mean that male trolls are traditionally the ones who carry the eggs?

But that can't be right, can it? Afterall, World Tour gave us yet ANOTHER egg scene later on in the movie

In Cooper's flashback, we clearly see Queen Essence being the one carrying the eggs meanwhile King Quincy is eggless. Now, as far as i see it, this could be explained either one of four ways:

1) Quincy was the one who actually produced the eggs and Essence is merely holding them for her husband (since her hair seems more fitting to be a makeshift nest compared to Quincy's)

2) Female trolls are the ones who produce the eggs. Guy Diamond is just a trans icon

3) Troll reproduction differs from genre to genre

4) There is a... *sighs* a/b/o type of dynamic among troll kind where certain trolls are capable of giving birth/siring children depending on a secondary gender

In regards to theory #3, this could also explain why Guy Diamond seems to reproduce and hatch an egg in such a short amount of time (like 5 seconds I'm pretty sure) as opposed to Queen Essence/King Quincy who's eggs presumably went a while longer before actually hatching.

Actually, speaking off eggs, are trolls the only species in their world that reproduce that way?

Because now that Band Together has officially been released, we now know for certain that it's possible for different species to crossbreed. Biggest example? Resident DILF Bruce and his giant muppet wife

(Credit to @captainunderkrupp )

When I saw these two... I swear...

And these two already have a shit ton of kids okay so like... either Brandi was the one giving birth or trollsona Daveed Digs was over here pumpin out eggs, which I mean-

DO YOU SEE HOW BIG THESE THINGS ARE COMPARED TO BRANCH AND POPPY?? Believe me I am PRAYING that Bruce gave himself some serious maternity/paternity leave because my guy is honestly a trooper

But yeah any thoughts? :))

[talesfromawannabejournalist]

Adam apple high school AU PT 3

(this is a pretty long one so bear with me)

. On the very first day at his new school, Lucifer had felt as though his soul had been stripped away from his body, the reason being...Adam Mann

. You see everything was going fine he was given a schedule of his classic, and a basic tour of where his classes were, and everything seemed to go well during his introduction as the new student during first period

. sure, when he said his name, he got a weird look from this one girl in the middle row, but he just ignored it

. it wasn't until after class when he was waking to his next class, and he accidentally bumped into the one person he never thought he would see again that it's kind of all went to Hell

Lucifer: I'm so sorry! I didn't see where I was going, are you alright?

Adam: yeah, I'm fine no skin off...YOU!

Lucifer: A, Adam!?

. Lucifer would hardly believe it, the most beautiful person that he had ever known was right before his eyes, and as it couldn't be even more possible was even more beautiful than ever

. His face was more defined as he had a small stubble on his chin, he had gotten taller too, his soft brown eyes had a sort of golden shine to them, and his scent was even stronger than ever before his scent was of freshly peeled oranges with a hint of soft soil

. but the most prominent feature about him would be his body and his body, oh holy mercy it had curves not the normal amount of curves the usual omega had he had curves for days, right from the top of his perky chest to his soft tummy, all the way down to his big thighs, then to end it was his big juicy booty, though (of course, he didn't see it till after Adam left, but he was only looking respectfully he swears!)

. But before he could fully admire the angel before him he was suddenly pressed up against the lockers with the once lovely scent turned sour as Adam glared down at the person who was responsible for ruining his life back in middle school

. Lucifer gulped, both in horniness and fear(but mostly for being a horny little gremlin)

Lucifer: listen, I know we didn't leave on good terms, but

Adam: But nothing! you stay out of my way here and I'll stay out of your way, got that pipsqueak!?

Lucifer: Pipsqueak?! (before he could say anything else Adam turned around, skirt swishing as he did so, and stomped off. And all Lucifer could process were these cold facts, the one who got away is here, he’s even more hot than ever, and he hates his guts

. this was going to be the longest semester of his fucking life

-

. a month and a half had passed since the incident, and neither Lucifer nor Adam could barely even tolerate being in the same room together let alone speak to one another

. Lucifer has tried to talk to Adam during this time when he sees him outside of class or when they do have class together tries to sit next to or at least near him

. however it keeps failing for him because A. Adam doesn’t want anything to do with him, and B. His guard dog Lute won’t even let him look at Adam’s general direction let alone try and go near him

. it all comes to a head one day when out in the school football field sitting on the bleachers, waiting for Adam to finish lacrosse team practice, once he saw he was done he waved and called out to him to get his attention

. luckily Adam did acknowledge him with an eye roll and walked over to him

. Lucifer gave himself a mental fist bump as they finally were going to clear the table and maybe Lucifer would finally be able to tell Adam how he felt

. which is why it made so much sense that the plan went to shit

. see while rushing down the bleacher steps he slipped on the last few steps causing him to trip and fall of landing on top of Adam

. at first Lucifer thinks he must have landed right on his stomach because the body part he lands on is soft and squishy…with a space in between

. he slowly lifts himself away to see that he had landed right on Adam’s breasts, a fiery blush spreads all across his upper body as his eyes look into Adam’s shocked/disgusted filled ones

Lucifer: I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry it was a complete accident, I swear!

. he didn’t get a chance to say anything else as he was picked up by the scruff, thrown off of Adam, and was proceeded beaten by Lute

. Adam was in a daze for a minute as he tried to understand what the actual Hell happened

. his attention was then focused on the fight between Lucifer and Lute fighting on the ground

. that was really bad for two reasons, they were still on school grounds and if the coach came back those two would be on grounds for expulsion while he was more worried about Lute getting into trouble, he couldn't help but feel a ping of worry in his chest for Lucifer, damn omega instinct, reason number two was that two alphas fighting especially over an omega can more often than not turn bloody

. So, scrambling to his feet, he made his way over to the small crowd where the girls from the team were watching the fight, some even egging it on

. He pushed his way through them and saw Lucifer had Lute pinned under him with his fist raised up ready to strike her

. Adam ran towards them and tried to pull Lucifer off when he suddenly felt a hand hit right in the eye, he falls backwards and clutches his eye while whimpering in pain

. both alphas stop immediately and turn their attention to the omega in distress

. Lucifer gets off the female alpha and rushes towards Adam, while Lute stays frozen in place not believing that she hit Adam, on accident of course she didn't expect he'd be on the crossfire she just wanted to get Lucifer off

Lucifer: Holy shit, are you okay!? here let me take a look

. at first, Adam tried to just leave but Lucifer kept him still while giving a pleading look he sighed and allowed the alpha to look him over Adam's eye appeared to be swollen and starting to throb

Adam: is it bad?

Lucifer: It's not so bad that you'd need an eye patch just need to get something cold on it, come on let's get you home

. Despite his own injuries he helps Adam up and starts to lead him away as the crowd slowly starts to dissipate now that the fight was over

Lute: WAIT ADAM I'M SO SORRY IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!

. Adam turns his head slightly and says in a frustrated tone

Adam: Not now Lute, just, not now, I'll text you later ok?

. Lute doesn't say anything as she watches from the ground in complete shock as Adam allows himself to be taken away by that little demon

---

. after carefully maneuvering around the school so no one would see them in their current predicament they made it over to the student parking lot where a small white car resided

. Lucifer unlocked it with a push of his key's button, went to the passenger side to open the door for Adam, and went to his side to start the car, before turning to Adam

Lucifer: do you mind giving me your address?

Adam: No, please don't it's my aunt's day off and she'll freak the fuck out if she sees this.

. he says while referring to his damaged eye

Lucifer: ok I get it, um well, if your comfortable with it, are you okay with coming back to my house? I can get you the right medical aid you need

. Adam doesn't say anything as he silently nods

. The drive there is silent and tense as Adam's attention is solely focused on what is happening out the window, while Lucifer keeps checking on him every so often

. They soon made it to a high-class condo complex, they park in front of one and Lucifer quickly opens his door to open Adam's and helps him out

. They head inside and Lucifer calls out to Uriel, he breathes a sigh of relief when he gets no response

Lucifer: Ok were good, let me take you to the kitchen

. There he gets Adam a bag full of ice and he gently places it on his eye, wincing from the slight flinch from the cold

Lucifer: you need anything else? are you hungry or thirsty?

Adam: all I need now is how to tell my Aunt on how I got this, though shouldn't you be more concerned with your own injuries?

Lucifer: I think the worst I got was a bump on the head, I'm ok

. It was true that while he had some bruises he was mostly a-ok

Lucifer: but if you really need an excuse for her, just say you accidentally ran into a door while rushing to class

. suddenly Adam's phone starts to buzz he picks it up and sighs seeing the caller's ID

Adam: speak of the devil (answers it) hey Aunt Sera, no I uh stopped at Mcdonald's for an after practice snack with a friend, yeah I know they cause people to get fat but guess what that sentiment can't really be applied to me when I'm already fat, no that's not sarcasm that is stating facts, uh huh, yeah, yeah I'll be home soon ok, I don't know an hour soon ok? See you then, yeah love you too

. he ends the call and looks at Lucifer

Adam: ok, situation averted, for now at least, so

Lucifer: So?

Adam: (sighs and looks straight into Lucifer's eyes) you have exactly thirty minutes and explain why the Hell you've been trying to follow me around and won't just leave me alone? I mean if you're trying to apologize over what happened in Eden you're doing a pretty shitty job at it

Lucifer: I, I'm sorry but while I did want to talk to you about the whole Eden situation, I don't see why I have to apologize for anything

Adam: um ok how about you stealing my girlfriend then making me feel like complete shit by constantly following me around and trying to shove your tongue down her throat, oh! and let's not forget the rumors that destroyed my reputation, because I know you and Lilith were the ones that start them!

Lucifer: first of all, YOU broke up with Lilith first I think that made it perfectly ok for me to "Steal your girlfriend" second I didn't start those rumors I swear I didn't Lilith must've said something to her friends and those friends said something to their friends and it probably spiraled out of control from there, thirdly Lilith was the one to drag me to those places I swear it was a giant coincidence

Adam: Broke up with her, what the Hell are you talking about I didn't break up with her she broke up with me by being a slut!

Lucifer: what about Eve then?! the girl you left Lilith for!

Adam: You mean Eve my cousin?

Lucifer: what?

Adam: Eve is my cousin, and she was a new student there and I was just helping her settle in!

Lucifer: I, I, you're not lying to me, are you?

Adam: What the actual fuck would I earn by lying to you?! No, I'm not lying she was the one who fucking cheated on me why don't you get that?!

. Lucifer took a shaky breath and turned away eyes going wide in realization

Lucifer: she lied; she's been playing me this whole time

Adam: YES! finally you see the truth, she was a lying cheating alpha whore who only cared about her own wants and needs

Lucifer: A, Adam I, I am so, so fucking sorry I swear I didn't know I just I swear if I knew the truth I wouldn't have done that...if it makes you feel any better, she wasn't the best girlfriend to me either

Adam: Makes me feel a little better

Lucifer: I don't know how I'm going to make it up to you, actually I have an idea

Adam: what is it?

Lucifer: this Friday I don't know if your aware but there's a festival happening at school and if you're ok with it, why don't you let me take you? we could have fun and get to know each other better, get to know the real us, not the version's Lilith's lies had created; so what do you say wanna do it?

Adam: Uh I

. Adam didn't know what to say to an offer like that, he literally just spilled his guts to someone who he held onto a great amount of resent towards, or he at least he did once the realization that Lucifer was used just like he was, he supposed that maybe he could give him a second chance

Adam: sure, what's the harm

---

. Later when Lucifer drops Adam off in front of his house, he walks him to his door when Adam turns to address him

Adam: Well, I'll see you later, I I'm glad we had this chance to finally clear the air

Lucifer: me too

. Lucifer gives him a soft smile which caused Adam to blush then in a last-minute decision Adam places a soft kiss on his cheek, Lucifer's face turns to a deep Scarlett and before he had a chance to react Adam went inside closing the door

. Lucifer's lips split open into a goofy grin as he sways his way back to the car in a lovesick manner

. Inside Adam reels from realization from what he just did when he suddenly hears his aunt

Sera: Oh good your back hopefully you didn't ruin your appetite because dinner is, IS THAT A BLACK EYE?!

. Oh shit he forgot about that

(sorry it’s late, hope you liked it)

[joefangs]

There are so many discrepancies if we compare season 1 Louis' memories and season 2 recollections of his. He made Lestat look almost bad, devilish in season 1, blamed everything on him, and stayed clean with Claudia. In season 2, we can finally see the issues with his memories of Lestat. Even in season 1 Louis changed his words in front of Daniel. In S2 it kind of proved that Louis' collections were muddled. He changed his memories way too many times. At last he admitted to go on with Lestat's version. I mean, I know and I can confirm that Lestat has always been good as far as the definition of "a good vampire" can go, and all the things Louis said about him are not all true.

If I go according to the books, Interview with the vampire and The Vampire Lestat are two different books with different Lestats to be precise. TV Louis said that Lestat didn't hesitate to kill, but the book Lestat from the second book, said he made a grave mistake of making Claudia ( About who, he said that he loved his dark daughter, and he didn't want that fate for her. He regretted making a young fledgling because Marius warned him about his mistake of creating Armand that young) and other than that he vowed to never kill any innocents. He only killed the damned ones, and the ones who were about to die. Also, got me thinking, how can he kill innocent people, when he took care of his family in France, who were all human. Even his mother opposed his actions, but Lestat didn't listen. So, how can a century old vampire, who still cares about his human family, gives them financial support all along, can kill mercilessly. It just didn't add to my wits. Most important of all, he loved Louis, more than Nicki even and admitted it over and over again. He longed to be with Louis, not because he always felt lonely, but because he loved Louis the most, so much that he rejected Armand in the book.

Louis' recollections of Lestat in season 1 is filled with somewhat hatred, because at that moment he thought Armand was his saviour. In S2, he started to have some clarity, mostly thanks to Daniel, and finally we know what happened.

In the book, Lestat was there at the Theatre the Vampire, he did accuse Claudia for his attempted murder, but let me tell you, he wasn't even in his right mind at that time. Even so, at that time he didn't accuse his Louis, and looked for his love, asked Armand, who (the B***h he is) lied to him about Louis' whereabouts. Lestat was somehow tricked by Armand, his thinking didn't work, as he mentioned that everything went in a trance, and after he accused Claudia, he was taken away forcibly, and he screamed Louis, Louis but with no avail, and they again fed him blood, and he forgot everything. I think Armand used magic, or he fed something to Lestat so he doesn't protest. After all of these, Lestat looked for Louis, and asked Armand to help him, and that BHole said he will not.

So, what I can surmise is, whatever you watched in S1, do not entirely believe it. This is mostly because, Lestat wasn't the one who lost his mind and hurt his Louis entirely. Louis was the pioneer of trouble in their home. He wasn't satisfied, he didn't accept the dark gift completely, and despised Lestat for that. That physical fight between them you can see, Lestat was hurt the most, both physically and mentally. And now I understand, why Louis kept seeing Dreamstat over and over again. Because, his guilt made him conjure Lestat everytime he thought he wanted a "home" with Armand.

Finally, the last episode depicted almost what The Vampire Lestat book has. They didn't show it, but Louis came back to Lestat, which he said was 'you came back to me'. Here, Lestat talks about a world tour, which is his rock concert in San Francisco. Here, Louis asks him to take him, and Lestat complies ecstatically. Also, they hugged compassiontely after meeting each other, just as they showed in the series. However, TV version displayed it as a part of Interview with the Vampire book, which is in reality from the book The Vampire Lestat.

[mackeydoodledoo]

She Wears Short Skirts, I Wear T-Shirts: Chapter 9

Pairing: Bridget (Cheerleader AU) x (Fem!)Reader

Chapter Summary: You and Bridget solidify your relationship. She asks you to come to the final home game of the season, however, tell her that your band has a gig the same day. Bridget doesn't know that the gig is being the halftime of her home football game. You get to meet her cheer team at an afterparty and see James Hook.

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, NSFW recollections

Chapter Key: Italics = Thoughts, +*+ = Time Skip, F/n = Friend's name, B/n = Band Name, Bold/Italic = Flashback, G/n = Guitarist's name, Ba/n = Bassist's name, Bold = Singing, C/n = Captain's Name

Chapter Theme(s): Halftime Setlist | Afterparty Setlist

A/n: Enjoy the fact that this is a LONG chapter :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Bridget's POV* You open your eyes and notice it was still dark out. However, see the sky beginning to turn a dark shade of blue.

You sigh, and arch your back as Y/n's lips slowly trail down your body.

"Y/n," You whisper

"Hmm?...." She looks up at you, eyes half open

"Please tell me you were fully awake when we...." Your voice trails off

You let out a strangled moan as Y/n gently rubs your clit in small circles, your entire body on fire.

"Y/n," You moan her name

"I'm here," She replies, resting her forehead onto yours

She slowly picks up her pace.

Your head tilts back, digging into the pillow.

"I was," She answers, "But, somewhat still asleep. But, I was mostly conscious."

"When?..." You ask

"The moment you said that you were real," She answers

You lean down and kiss her firmly.

+*+

The next time you wake up, you see Y/n over in the kitchen. You throw on a hood hanging on the back of a chair and slowly wrap your arm around her stomach and rest your chin on her shoulder. Your eyes look down at her arm, and finally see the details of her sleeve. Your other hand traces the vines all up and down her arm.

"It's beautiful," You kiss the back of her shoulder

"Told you that you'd see the sleeve eventually," She chuckles

"Is there a reason you chose floral design?" You ask

"The aesthetic," She answers, "No real meaning behind it, other than I liked it."

She seats you down at the tabletop bar and begin setting out plates for breakfast.

"So, what time are you going back to college?" She asks

"In a few hours," You say, "Gotta catch up on some work before the week starts."

"Glad I decided not to go to college," She says, sitting in the seat next to you, "Too much money..."

"College isn't for everyone," You say, "Music is working out for you so, there wouldn't be a point for you to go."

"Yeah," She says

*Y/n's POV* "So, how did you and Hook get into the same college?" You ask

"He got a full ride football scholarship," Bridget says, "I did the traditional application and got a few scholarships of my own. It was entirely coincidental."

"Ahh," You say, "Here I thought you simply 'ran off' to the same college to follow him."

"Ha ha very funny," She chuckles, "I wouldn't want to follow anyone..."

"Only me," You tease

"I'll keep it in mind once I graduate," She says, "I'll have to figure out where my culinary skills will lead me."

"Maybe we'll hit you up for catering for a local show," You suggest

"That's a possibility," She says, "But, all of the events outside of campus; study sessions, football afterparties, he'd even come to our cheerleader get-togethers. Mostly because half of our team is dating the football team."

"Ew, talk about cliche romances," You sigh

"Yeah, but you should come to our last football game this season," Bridget suggests

"When?" You ask

"This upcoming Saturday," She says

"Ahh, I have a gig that day," You say, "One of our biggest ones to date."

"Aww, a shame, what's the gig? Are you opening for a big band that's on an arena tour?" She asks

"Something like that," You shrug

+*+

As you finish the last bits of food, your mind begins trailing back to the events of the previous night...

As your lips trail down Bridget's stomach, she twitches. You stop and look up at her.

"I'm sorry," She pants

"Don't be," You caress her face

She leans into your touch.

"Do you want me to stop Bridget?" You ask

"God please no," She begs, smiling

You lowly chuckle as you begin to kiss her stomach again. Her skin was smooth. Way too smooth. You questioned how often she moisturizes her body. You continue to taste the scent left on her skin; continuing to make her writhe right under you.

"Y/n," Bridget's voice calls out, slightly muffled

"Hmm?" You ask, your eyes traveling up to meet hers

"Uhm... My eyes are up here," She chuckles

"Sorry I was zoning out," You say

She hooks her finger under your chin, Mhm, don't worry, there'll be more opportunities."

She hops down from the chair, "Right now I have to get ready to go."

She smiles as she gives your cheek a gentle pinch before running to the bathroom. You out the couch back as you wait for Bridget to finish in the bathroom.

+*+

"Shouldn't we tell your bandmates?" Bridget asks, standing back up, "Since... Well, you're around them a lot? And since I was at the show last night."

"Oh, do you want to?" You ask, "I wasn't sure if you wanted to be public about it first."

"I kinda do yeah," She gently smiles, "Just to your bandmates first. Funny as it sounds.... I really like being around your friends. Even if... One of them doesn't seem to be fond of me."

"She'll open up eventually," You say, hoping

You chuckle as you take out your phone, opening the camera. Bridget takes the phone and pulls your face towards hers. Even after she snaps the photo, she doesn't let go of you. You didn't want to let go of her either. However, she clears her throat as she takes a step back.

"I should uh..." She says, "I should get going. Got a long drive..."

"Yeah, right," You clear your throat, "Text me when you're home."

She nods as she shuts the car door. You watch her drive off from the guest area of the parking garage. On your way back up to your apartment, you share the photo with your bandmates group chat.

Finally! Jeez you wouldn't stop staring at that photo from high school. Even if it's someone from the past.... Sometimes second chances work out.

You don't see a reply from F/n... Understandable.

However, sometime later, you see a separate text from F/n.

You're real serious about her huh? Yeah, I am. Hah... It was obvious the moment you had her get into your car after our hometown show. But, I deserve a full on explanation later. Deal.

When you go into the studio later, your friends sitting in the lounge rather than the recording studio.

"Spill," F/n says

"Good to see y'all too," You chuckle, sitting in an open chair, "F/n did you tell them?"

"No, we were solely curious about how all of this between you and Bridget resurfaced," G/n says, "Missed that kiddo."

"To make a long story short... Her now-ex cheated," You answer, bluntly

They stare, blank-faced.

"Well that doesn't surprise me about Hook," F/n says, "He always seemed like a player. I'm surprised he hasn't attempted to try and win her back."

"She mentioned that he's tried right as she ended it," You explain, "But, I haven't seen anything recently."

"Good, I would totally like to wham my fist into his face," F/n says

"You always want to wham your fists on someone's face," You sigh, "But I would too."

"You two are the most chaotic," Ba/n sighs

"Ba/n, it's James Hook," You say, "I've been wanting to brawl with him for a hot while now."

"Okay can we discuss our upcoming gig now?" G/n asks

You all nod in agreement.

"Okay, so we all know we're going to be the halftime performance at Auradon University," G/n begins, "We only have twenty minutes..."

You wanted to tell Bridget, but G/n told you to not tell anyone. As it was the biggest show you guys would be doing all year.

"You didn't tell Bridget did you?" G/n looks at you

"No, I told her we had a gig, that's it," You answer, raising your hands

"Good," He says

+*+

Hey, good luck tonight. I'll be cheering for you in spirit :)

*Bridget's POV* You smile at Y/n's text as you put your phone into your purse. You have a phone call with Y/n almost every night; some night's it had been texting. You were sad that she wasn't able to make it out to your final game.

"Hey Bridge, you've been a lot more chipper lately," Your cheer captain comes up to you, "Who's the lucky person who swept you off of your feet?"

"Let's say it's someone who gave me a second chance," You answer, smiling

"Oh, was it this 'high school crush' you had?" She asks

"Yeah," You answer

"Gotta give me the deets later!" She smirks

You follow your girls out to the tunnel.

"Bridget," Hook's voice sends chills down your spine

Not in a good way.

You attempt to walk off with your girls however, he firmly grips your forearm.

"Hook stop," You yank your arm away, "We don't have time for this right now."

"Let it go Hook," your Cheer captain pulls you along

You hear him growl as you walk towards the other end of the tunnel.

"He wasn't too egressive was he?" She asks, looking down at your forearm

You shake your head, "I'm fine, let's get this show on the road."

+*+

"Good evening Auradon University!" the PA announces, "For tonight's halftime, we have brought a very special guest to perform for you all tonight."

You begin to hear a guitar riff playing loudly, but still low enough to hear the announcer.

"Please welcome back, G/n, and his band, B/n!" The announcer yells

Your eyes widen at the curtains ripping from its attachment to the columns holding the stage lights. You look over to your cheer mates and notice how they were losing their minds. You could only look in shock as Y/n's band plays on that stage.

You could hear the amount of people cheering for them. In four years, you didn't realize how much more popular they've gotten.

If we listen to each other's heart We'll find we're never too far apart And maybe love is a reason why For the first time ever, we're seein' it eye to eye

Seein' it eye to eye (Eye to eye) For the first time (first time) Seein' it eye to eye (first time) Eye to eye

But your eyes widen as Y/n leaves the drum set, and switches with the bassist going into the next song.

Since when could Y/n play anything other than drums?

You look at all of your girls and notice how they were all fawning, despite that their boyfriends were mere feet away. As soon as you turn back to see Y/n on the big screen, your heart thrummed against your chest.

Recipe for disaster Wondering what's gonna come after Will I ever know Do you? Do you?

Do you? Do you?

You watch as Y/n dances around the stage, having the time of her life.

I can't believe that's my girlfriend. Attractive... And multi-talented.

Don't know why, I don't know why, I don't know why I'm so obsessed I wish that I, yea, wish that I, yea, wish that I could worry less  Don't know why, I don't know why, I don't know why I'm so obsessed

Your eyes widen as Y/n stands on the kick drum.

I wish that I, I wish that I, I wish that I could worry less 

You gasp as she jumps off of it; landing perfectly on beat to the chorus.

Recipe for disaster Wondering what's gonna come after Will I ever know Do you? Do you?

Do you? Do you?

Throughout the next few songs, she switches between the instruments.... You were aware that she could sing backing vocals, but not once did you ever see her take the lead microphone, for the lead part.

Up until the second-to-final song...

She high-fives F/n as she hands her the microphone.

"Plot twist-the drummer does sing," She chuckles, "We all having a good time out there?"

The crowd erupts to loud cheering.

"Amazing to hear," Y/n speaks, "Well, it's been an honor performing halftime, I will be at the mic for these last two songs. This one goes out to my girl."

"Her girlfriend goes here?!" You overhear someone's conversation

It's me.

Your head looks around and see your cheer girls talking amongst themselves, assuming that they're coming up with theories to whom Y/n's girlfriend could be.

"She's like... Super hot," You overhear another conversation, "I'd be jealous of whoever her girlfriend is!"

You raise your moms up to your face and couldn't help but smirk to yourself. Your egotistical side wants to brag that the Y/n is your partner, however, either they wouldn't believe you, or you wouldn't hear the end of it. But, you cheer your heart out. Y/n Y/l/n just dedicated a song to you.

"Thanks everyone," She chuckles, "Thanks for having us out here. Now let's end this halftime on a high note!"

Y/n begins singing, muffled vocals as G/n backs it up.

Hyper aware of any change in your voice Yeah I can tell when i've started to annoy being alone is what I try to avoid I put in effort but it just gets destroyed It's true you got me undone I'm through letting you take away all of the fun

You seem so distracted with yourself with yourself Say I overreacted But it's hard for me to tell You you You're my only distraction in this hell but it's oh well

You watch as Y/n falls onto her knees as she sings the outro.

Don't mean to be a bother I'll get out of the way Cause one way or another I'm sensing foul play Say I'm overreacting it's getting hard to tell You were my one distraction but I still wish you well

Staff were quick about disassembling the stage setup as Y/n and her band break down their instruments, disappearing somewhere within the stadium itself. You run into the tunnel in hopes to spot them walking... Well, anywhere out of here.

"Bridget, what are you doing?" C/n asks, "We need to be back out there right now!"

Your head swings back from the hallway to your cheer captain.

"They're practically celebrities, they won't stick around!" She adds, gently grabbing your arm, "They might have special seating or something!"

Your eyes continue searching, your head turns back into the tunnel even after your captain drags you out of it.

*Y/n's POV* You load all music equipment into a small trailer, Ba/n locking it with a padlock.

"So.... Uhhh... What now?" You ask, "Football games are beneath me at this point."

"There's a really good place just out of campus, close to downtown," G/n says, "Assuming you guys have never been here before, let's go!"

Your bandmates agree and begin carpooling into Ba/n's car. You turn your back to them and pull out your phone; nothing from Bridget.

"Yo! Lover girl!" G/n calls you out

You turn back to them.

"We'll be back before the game is over and so you can see your girlfriend," He says, "Now get your ass in the car!"

+*+

"It was really weird having eyes literally everywhere on us, a whole three-sixty," F/n states, "Everywhere I look.... People."

"Even going to a stadium concert, the stage is always off to the side and then there would be a few small stages on the ground floor," Ba/n says

"Don't tell me you two were anxious about that run," G/n chuckles, "It's only going to continue going up from here."

*Bridget's POV* Another win for Auradon University... No surprise for you. Through the sea of exiting fans, you attempt to politely push through them as you rush to the locker room.

As soon as you reach the locker room, you immediately search for your phone, dialing Y/n.

"Yeah?" Y/n's voice answers on the other end

"Where are you?" You ask, throwing on sweats over your uniform

You gather all of your belongings.

"I have no clue," She answers, "I don't go here. We're just waiting at our cars for the traffic to let up so we can get out of here faster. But, I'm mostly waiting for you."

"I'm coming out of the locker room just hang on," You tell her

You keep her on the phone as you exit the locker room and out to the parking lot.

"Can you give me the general area of where you're waiting," You say

"Yeah uh.... I'm.... Well, we're kinda just across the street at the convenience store. Only place we could park at. Cheer captain slipped us an invitation to an after party at her mansion," She says

"Of course she did," You sigh, "Okay, I see you. I'll be over in a second."

As soon as Y/n comes into view, you begin breaking into a run. You notice her spotting you, and she makes her way towards you. You squeal as you jump into her arms.

"You are a liar," You laugh

"G/n wanted to keep it a secret," She chuckles

"Come on, I have to get changed and bring my treats to the after party," You say

+*+

Y/n meets you at your apartment.

"You're dressing up?" She asks

"Seniors do," You clarify, "One last time to feel pretty."

"Well, you don't really have to make an effort there," She chuckles

You smile uncontrollably as you reach into the fridge and grab cupcakes.

"I should wait until the party but I didn't know you were going to be here, so you're the first to try my fabulous pink flamingo feather cupcakes," You remove the cover from the platter

*Y/n's POV* You delicately take the cupcake and slowly undo the wrapping. You even out the frosting-cupcake ratio as your teeth tear into the bakery item.

"Heaven," You sigh, savoring each bite

"Now come on, we don't want to keep them waiting," Bridget hands you a platter of the cupcakes

+*+

You carefully take the bakery items out from a secure spot in her trunk

"Bridget! And... Y/n Y/l/n," One cheerleader attempts to not faint on the spot, "B/n's drummer."

"Hi," You awkwardly smile

You and Bridget walk off to the kitchen, putting the cupcakes somewhere on an open spot on the dessert table. You linger behind Bridget as she brings you into the living room; your bandmates already there. They're chatting among everyone present.

This living room is bigger than my apartment....

"Uhhhhh," Bridget says, clearing her throat loudly

Your head travels down to her as the eyes land on the two of you.

"Girls, I have an announcement," Bridget announces

Without another word, she tugs the collar of your jacket, her eyes looking down at your lips, then looking back up at you. One arm snakes around her waist; pulling her into you, and the other uses its index finger to tilt her head up to you. The both of you meet halfway: the room erupting into a cheer. The both of you rest your foreheads against each other as the cheering continues.

"It feels like we just got married," You chuckle

"Would that be a bad thing?" She asks, smiling

You shake your head, "But, save that for the future."

"God since when!?" A cheerleader asks

"Mere weeks ago," You answer, "But, I've known her for a long while."

"So... She's the one that gave you a second chance?" Another cheerleader asks

Bridget nods, "The cheer captain."

You nod and give the captain a head nod. You find an open spot on the floor and Bridget sits between your legs, leaning back into your body.

"So.... How do you guys know each other?" A football player asks

"We attended the same high school together," Bridget says

"Wouldn't you know it, she's the one who came up to me," You chuckle, "Back then, I was drum captain."

"Pretty lame if you tell me," Hook's voice booms from across the room

"Lay off Hook," One of his teammates tells him, "I'm always in for good music, and want to know all about the people behind them."

+*+

As the night rolls on, your band and the football/cheer team continue conversing amongst one another.

"Hey, I know it might be last minute, but would it be okay if you guys give a performance before my parents kick us all out?" The cheer captain asks

You look to all of your bandmates. They give a thumbs up.

"Give us a little bit to discuss a setlist," You answer

Bridget gets up and you follow your bandmates outside.

*Bridget's POV* "C/n that's asking too much," You cross your arms

"Sorry," She shrugs her shoulders, "They seem willing to do it anyway. Who knows when we'll get another opportunity like this again!"

You roll your eyes.

+*+

You watch as C/n does the decent thing and help them hook up their sound equipment to the power to her house.

"Y/n, you don't have to do this you know," You come up to Y/n

"It's fine. We're already set up, besides, we like doing acoustics too," She smiles

She kisses your temple and meets up with her band.

+*+

"I was dared to sing the last two songs," She chuckles, "But apparently I gt a voice that matches this artist and I enjoy singing this artist the most when I do have to sing in our sets. These will be our last few of the night. So enjoy it while you can."

+*+

"For this last song, I dedicate it to my girl," Y/n smile, standing from her sea ton the other side of the pool, "Our story is insane. But, if any of you got that special 'Antidote', hold onto it."

G/n begins the opening riff. Your heart thrums against your temples as Y/n approaches you; your cheer mates move to sit next to their partners as Y/n seats herself next to you, slinging her arm over your shoulder.

Let everybody say what they wanna say, what they wanna say, baby Let everybody talk (ooh) They all got their stones to toss (ooh) I know you're gonna find me if I lose my mind

She stands up, but holds her hand out to you. You take it and she pulls you close to her.

I get high, I get high I get low, I get low You're my dopamine state You're my sanity dose High, I get high On your new rockin' boat You're the medication I wanna take You are my antidote (you are my) You are my antidote (You) you are (are), you are (my), you are my anti-

Ooh-ooh Ooh-ooh

Erupts of cheers echo through the backyard.

*Y/n's POV* Soyu compose yourself, your eyes travel over Bridget's shoulder and you catch Hook, staring.

Traditionally, if you were still in high school, you'd be terrified of that look. However, you grew up. You have a lot of pent up rage towards him. But, you could care less.

Chapter 10

[buddiebeginz]

Omg, so I was readin someone elses reaction to the finale and they said this and a light-bulb went off possibly in my head.

What if the "but you think I do?" (Have daddy issues") and "god I hope so" (T kinda muttered into his wine glass) is that Tommy thinks the only reason Buck is into him or could be into him is because of said daddy issues and he's actually insecure about it.

Like that would kinda connect to his snide remark about closet space on their first date. Just saying.

Like their communications are just a little bit off. But instead of saying something real, again Tommy is hoping that Buck will understand his subtle jab about something without him having to come out and just say it.

Like Tommy thinks possibly the only reason Buck is with him is because of his Daddy issues (because Tommy is older etc) but they've never talked about it.

Also the jab about the closet space on their first date? Buck thought they were still going to see a movie until a car showed up & it was only for Tommy and Tommy left him stranded in front of the restaurant. What if they're still there, relationship-wise?

Tommy said Buck was adorable and all that, but still left him there. Like he might legit want this 'ship to work, but they just don't seem to be like in the same place in their lives. Ya know?

Does any of this even make sense? Did I connect shit? XD (*insert that gif in here*)

I guess tl;dr : Tommy really does want it to work with Buck but thinks Buck might only be with him because of his "daddy issues" and he'll take it because he likes Buck. But they just suck at communicating and want different things/aren't in the like same place in their lives.

Also they communicate differently. Tommy does snarky jabs & dry "humor" hoping people (or Buck) will understand what he means without him having to come out and say what he actually means. And Buck idk, likes honesty and talking upfront? Idk. And so a lot of the snark might go over his head? And a massive people-pleaser.

I hope this makes sense!

Sorry it's taken me a bit to get back to this.

I do think you're onto something about the communication issues but my feeling about B/T is this:

I personally think T*mmy was originally pursuing Eddie. When you watch 704 T*mmy is all about Eddie. By the end of the ep T*mmy has figured out Eddie isn't available/still in the closet and Buck tells T*mmy he was trying to get his attention. But even T*mmy knows that's not true. I'm positive T*mmy knows there's something between Buck and Eddie. Still I think he likes Buck and thinks he's hot and decides to go for it with him.

But you can see in pretty much every interaction that T*mmy has with Buck that T*mmy does not see him as an equal. In 704 When Buck came to the hanger for a tour T*mmy didn't tell him ahead of time that he was going to be leaving to go with Eddie. Eddie just showed up and T*mmy took off. T*mmy called Buck kid (you know like Bobby does). T*mmy calls Buck Evan even though there's no sign that Buck ever asked him to do that and we've been told quite explicitly from Buck himself (to his parents) that people who really know him call him Buck.

T*mmy is the one who jumps in and kisses Buck first. Which I know was written to be this passionate moment but at the same time it also shows how T*mmy is controlling most things in that relationship. T*mmy plans their first date and where it's going to be. T*mmy seems annoyed when Buck is nervous on the date. T*mmy chooses to end the date without much explanation and leaves Buck at the restaurant.

The coffee date is one of the better interactions between B/T and may come across on the surface like they're on equal ground but again it's mostly T*mmy here that is in control. Buck is the one waiting at the restaurant not knowing if T*mmy is even going to show up. Then Buck asks T*mmy to be his date for Maddie's wedding and has to wait on T*mmy for an answer. Also T*mmy laughs at Buck when he asks him to be his date. Which I know wasn't supposed to be this harsh judgmental reaction but still this is the first time Buck is asking a guy to be his date to something important and this is T*mmy's (initial) response.

At the bachelor party T*mmy chooses to not wear anything remotely on theme and is then dismissive when Buck seems hurt that he didn't care. He's also on call and can't stay. I'm not sure how far in advance Buck asked him to go to Maddie's wedding but I assume it was far enough that T*mmy could have asked for that time off so he could be there but he didn't.

In 709 Buck is excited about the award ceremony and T*mmy responds to him by saying "enjoy it while it lasts". This is Buck's first big award as a firefighter he should be on cloud nine and the guy he's seeing should be thrilled for him but again T*mmy just comes off like he doesn't care. Some would argue that's just his general demeanor but that just highlights how different T*mmy and Buck are.

In 710 there's the dinner scene. Where Buck is trying to open up about his fears of losing the only real father figure he's known in Bobby and T*mmy's reaction is to again be dismissive, make it about himself, and change the subject to something sexual.

Again you're right Buck and T*mmy do communicate differently too differently in my opinion but I think they're very intentionally being written that way. Particularly in scenes when we've had Buck, T*mmy, and Eddie together like in 706. We're meant to see how much T*mmy just doesn't get Buck and how much Eddie does.

I don't think T*mmy is worried that Buck is with him because of his "daddy issues" rather I think T*mmy likes the idea of being in control both in an outside of the bedroom and that's the main part of the attraction for him with Buck. But much like Taylor when things aren't physical there is very little substance to their relationship and Buck will come to realize that.

I think because T*mmy is connected to Buck figuring out his sexuality and how new and exciting all of that feels to Buck he's lumped a lot of his feelings for T*mmy in there. So everything with T*mmy right now feels new and exciting and fun but eventually Buck will have to take a long hard look at this relationship (just like he had to with Taylor) and realize that this person doesn't really make him happy and doesn't really get who he is as a person.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

On the Subject of Pat 2.0

Hello! It’s your resident 25 year old working their first job out of grad school with no family in the area and a friend group that is comprised mostly of people older than them here to talk about "Pat" Phakphum Tangwatthana another resident 25 year old working his first job out of grad school with no family in the area and a friend group that is comprised mostly of people older than him. 

I have seen some confusion or distaste around Pat and Pat’s storyline in the most recent episode, and I understand the criticism around the editing needing to be tighter, but I do just want to talk about my own perceptions of Pat and why I didn’t need any more explicit explanations for his behavior than we already got. 

It’s essay time :D

Pat and his emotions in Episode 9: 

We start the episode on Pat’s point of view, cutting back to the previous evening and establishing Pat’s level of inebriation

Gif from @pharawee

Everything is ghosting and blurry and it is very clear that Pat was out of his head if not out of his body when he was having fun with Jeng on the dance floor. This is evidence enough as far as I am concerned that Pat had absolutely zero knowledge of Jeng’s dance floor confession. But what he does remember is learning Jeng is queer. Which as we are all aware, rocks his fucking world. 

Now, I wrote in my previous timeline that narratively, Pat has never had the time to contemplate the sexuality of his boss. At the very beginning, he spills glass jelly on Jeng’s shoe and meets a kind and very attractive man, and then he just simps over this very Lorge Man for awhile while Jeng is actively trying to manage a crush on an employee because he understands would be a huge HR Violation if he were to try to pursue that thread. But Pat has been flirting hard, in ways that are obvious if you are queer and able to identify them, but less so if you are straight and don’t automatically look at the level of familiarity as flirting. However, we have to look at when, where, and how Pat and Jeng break their professionalism and where they maintain it.

Pat only initiates the break in professionalism when he is drunk and/or out of the office. His criticisms of Jeng he gives in the review? Drunk. His commentary about how when he first met Jeng he was nice and he is having a hard time reconciling that Jeng with micromanaging boss Jeng? Drunk. Hanging all over him and tugging at his shirt? Drunk. Hanging all over him and tugging at his shirt round 2? Drunk. 

The rest Jeng initiates. He engineers the dinner in his office, he asks Pat to come over on Sunday to work, he suggests Pat get ready at his apartment, he suggests he and Pat share a hotel room, he asks Pat to accompany him to the furniture store, he calls the video of drunk!Pat cute, he asks Pat to go on the restaurant tour with him. 

So, from this we know that Pat is aware enough of the office gossip and when in control of his mental faculties, is able to temper his feelings towards Jeng while at work. And that Jeng has been simping hard from the beginning, and Pat has been reciprocating the energy whenever Jeng starts the interaction. 

But we also know that Pat has a difficult time handling his other emotions, especially while at work. Partially because he is young, partially because he is exploited, partially because he is almost certainly spending a lot of his time focusing on a) not having a meltdown and b) not hitting on his boss in front of his coworkers. 

Anyway, the timeline of Pat’s immediate emotions around Jeng’s sexuality confession I have previously outlined so just keep that in mind while I continue to ramble about Pat in this episode. 

Pat learns Jeng is gay, freaks out about it because Jeng is fully aware of everything Pat has been doing, and Pat is fully aware that Jeng has been intentionally flirting with him this whole time. Spirals about it in his dreams the whole night and wakes up hungover and having an existential crisis about what the fuck comes next for him. 

He takes the day off, tries to give himself some space to think, process, reassess, and figure out his next steps. But instead…his Mom is in town, and in his kitchen, cooking him breakfast. 

What is she doing here? He doesn’t know, it’s a surprise, and a good surprise because we know he has a good relationship to his parents, and you can tell that from the way he interacts with his mother. But a mother is going to mother, so she’s going to comment on his eating habits, and he’s going to lie about how often he eats instant noodles, and she’s going to check in on his health, having seen him absolutely plastered the previous evening, and she is going to ask about the very kind and handsome man that helped Pat home and made sure he was safe. 

And she’s going to say a passing comment about Pat being a burden to his friend.

Which, looking at Pat’s face here, was not really what he wants to be hearing at this particular moment. Not when he is trying to get Jeng out of his head, not when he is trying to create space to figure out what he is feeling about that entire situation, the reality that he could have what he wants, the understanding that Jeng has been wise to Pat’s attraction to him this whole time. Not when he got in to that whole situation with Jeng last night because he was trying to distract himself from being sad about breaking up with Put. His parents live in another country, they have no idea what is going on in his life, his mother sees her son was out with a nice man and so has no reason to suspect something would have been wrong. So she stumbles right in to one of Pat’s sore spots. 

“Where did you meet him?” she asks and Pat’s goes:

If anyone needs a live action shocked pikachu face, look no further. He knows he cannot tell her. He knows what it would sound like, what it would seem like, how inappropriate it would appear for him to say “I met him at work” and even more so if he has to say “that is my boss.” 

He’s had the realization that Jeng is gay, and therefore that a relationship between Jeng and Pat is possible, and he is now having the realization of just how bad it would appear to literally anyone on the outside. Even now, even before they are dating, when they are just coworkers and friends, his mother knowing that he was out, late at night, that drunk around his boss??? Absolutely not. Pat recognizes that and quickly shifts the focus of the conversation away from Jeng, asking his mother about a doctor’s appointment she is supposed to be getting to. 

Another outfit, and another day has passed. Pat is staring at the stuffed tiger that he got on his furniture -date- shopping trip with Jeng. A stuffed animal that he has been using as a replacement for the shark stuffed animal that he had when he was with Put and that Put has used to manipulate Pat into talking to him and into considering re-entering into a relationship with him. This tiger here is serving as both a reminder of Put, the fact that Pat was unable to love Put because of his feelings for Jeng, and as a reminder of Jeng, whose sexuality, level of availability, and messy HR potentiality are all front and center in Pat’s mind. So he hides the tiger away in a drawer where he doesn’t have to look at it, so that he isn’t faced with a constant reminder of the personal crises in his life, because he is young, and his parents are here, and he’s never experienced this particular combination of emotions before, and to talk to his parents about his dilemma he would have to explain this situation to his parents and I don’t think Pat believes he can talk to anyone about it. Because all of his friends besides Ae are friends from work, Jaab is Jeng’s brother, Jen and Jaab are going through it and Jen is quitting, Kanon was on the production team and Kanon is married to Ae so whatever Pat says to Ae may get back to Kanon pretty quickly. Chot is fully incorporated into the office life and is fully aware of what is going on (and in fact may think Pat and Jeng are much further ahead in their relationship than they are) but Pat thinks he’s being sly about his feelings for Jeng, and Chot being directly in the office rather than on an outside production team is not going to be a draw to talking about his feelings for his boss. 

Meanwhile, Jeng is approaching the other queer in the office to ask if Chot has seen Pat cause he hasn’t been in the office in a few days and realizes that Pat is taking days off without even

notifying him. Readers, I do not need to show you Chot’s face throughout all of this. Chot is 150% convinced that Jeng and Pat are in the middle of a lover’s quarrel. I need a Chot live reaction to finding out that Pat and Jeng haven’t fucked yet, and a gravestone for Chot when he learns that Pat thought Jeng was straight. 

Alright, so, Jeng is in his sad boy hours clearly pining after Pat in the office in front of Chot, but pushes that all back down in order to perform his necessary duties as a boss. Jeng too, is trying to keep control of his emotions, but will end up losing his grip of them and having an utter break down. 

But this is not about Jeng, this is about Pat 

Pat’s Mom is here, but she’s settled in, and Pat’s off work, so maybe now he has time to try to process some of his emotions? 

Nope! Dad appears!

And what? Another surprise! Another parent coming to stay at his house without warning, and for what reason? 

…

Oh. 

Oh shit. 

Pat has completely lost track of the passage of time. Which hey, works for Ae going from 0 to 30 weeks out of nowhere. Why does his Dad come to Thailand around this time every year? 

It’s almost Pat’s birthday, and Pat has completely forgotten. This man has been juggling all of his work, a ton of his coworkers assignments, MLM schemes (the only mlm Pat is interested in is…nevermind), the Forge project, The Forge commercial shoot, leading the commercial shoot, his relationship with Put, his breakup with Put, navigating remaining professional in a workspace with his recent ex when emotions are still raw, and his mounting feelings for actually gay actually single hot boss man. On top of that, Pat is living alone, surviving off of ramen noodles, and (iirc) waiting to see if he makes it past the probationary period and is actually going to be allowed to stay on as an employee when that window is over. Jen is an adult, and not one Pat knows very well, Chot has his shit together and is engaged, Ae and Kanon are adults, married, and soon-to-be-parents, and Jaab is his age but is just as much if not more of a hot mess than Pat is. Pat gets convinced to go on that restaurant tour by Ae and their other friend, but those two are straight and therefore will not get what Pat is spiraling about after finding out Jeng is gay. So where can Pat go? Who can he turn to for advice? Who is going to have the time and the understanding and the patience to help him navigate all of these rising pressures? 

Well, we get a good indication, of where that is heading because Pat’s dad takes one look at Pat’s utter shock at realizing that he has forgotten his own birthday and states: 

Life must be pretty hard lately. His father is in the know, he’s gettin’ wise, gettin’ with it. It’s a great dynamic of Pat pretending to be fine for the sake of his mother, and then having no ability to hide from his father because the initial shock of the realization meant he wasn’t able to mask his emotional state. 

He burns his ramen noodles, his father cooks for him. Gives him vegetables. Calls it like it is in Pat’s life even though he doesn’t have the full context. 

Pat returns to work, and Chot starts doing his gay fairy godmother deal, vague-posting about what he thinks Pat’s problem is through the lens of his own issues. He knows Pat is young, and Pat is coming out of a relationship, and that Pat does not have a lot of guidance on the whole Being Gay in Thailand thing, despite being pretty comfortable in his sexuality and navigating his relationship with Put pretty maturely, if we’re honest. Chot is reaching out, Chot is extending the hand, Chot is trying to turn the tide of their relationship from just work friends to friends who can rely on one another in their personal life.

Now, Pat has been dissociating for the entire conversation thus far, because realizing he has forgotten his birthday because he’s been so caught up in everything has started his death spiral. When Jeng came out he tripped into it and was gripping at the edge of his remaining sanity by trying to give himself time and space to work through his emotions, but the arrival of his father and the understanding that he has not been thinking about himself for however long is what starts this final (and ultimately unsuccessful) attempt at managing his emotional state. 

But Chot’s admission that being gay is hard for Krit, snaps Pat out of it a little bit, and we get Pat’s “At least he’s straightforward with showing you that he loves you” and now…Pat has not been paying a whole lot of attention to what Chot was saying, so this is either Pat being very good at processing information while dissociating, and/or Pat picking up on the part of the story that is most relevant to him and attaching his own frustrations with his current situation to it. 

“At least he is straightforward with showing you that he loves you” 

Okay, so let’s explore who this is about. That’s right. It’s about literally every possible romantic pursuit of his in the last few weeks/months. Put, MLM guy, and Jeng. 

On the Put end of things, Put left Pat two years prior, valuing his job over his relationship with Pat while simultaneously struggling with his own queerness. When Pat and Put get back together, Pat pours his whole heart and soul into trying to make the relationship work. Because he needs it to work. Because he’s in love with his boss and he can’t be in love with his boss because that way madness (and job loss) lies. We do see moments of them being lovey-dovey, we see moments of flirtation, but the show is extremely intentional about showing that Pat and Put’s relationship is not a happy one. Put ignores Pat over dinner, that dinner scene where Put is mostly focused on his cellphone is dimly and cooly lit, with the tiniest smidge of warmth behind Pat and nothing anywhere close to Put. 

They make out in a hotel and Pat asks if Put likes him, and Put does not give him an answer, he just flips the question back around on Pat. Pat doesn’t answer either, not at first, he just kisses Put, and then realizes that it doesn’t feel the way it used to, and whatever feelings he may have had for Put before are no longer there. Because he is in love with his boss. So he leaves Put and goes to the party to seek out the person he wants to be around/with. When Pat breaks up with Put he calls him out on his attempts to manipulate him. So Pat is sad about the break up, sure, and he is allowed to be. But he is also reconciling here with the fact that Put never showed interest in him, unless and until Pat was threatening to leave. 

Then we get MLM guy, who is very forward in his interest with Pat. Pat is picking up what MLM guy is putting down (he thinks), and gets all excited about the prospect of having another Hot Tall Boi to channel his energy into so that he isn’t left to think about Jeng or Put’s return to Thailand. Pat is excited for the “date” and is devastated when it turns out this man wasn’t interested in him at all, he just wants him to join a multilevel marketing scheme. After which Pat is harassed at work and hounded by this man until he is literally threatened. So now Pat has to grapple also with the knowledge that the one person who seemed to be obviously, openly interested in him, was just using those emotions to get something out of him. Yet another manipulation.  On the Jeng end of things, Jeng is forced to be subtle about his love for Pat by nature of the power imbalance inherent in a boss and employee relationship. Jeng has been intentionally engineering his romantic advances to have as much plausible deniability as possible. Which means, Pat, thinking that Jeng is straight, has not picked up on them. Or rather has convinced himself that Jeng wasn’t being intentional about making moves. If Jeng had been more obvious, had pursued him the way that Pat is used to being pursued, that is, more explicitly, if Jeng had even been more obviously queer, then Pat would have known immediately. But Pat has a luxury that Jeng and even Put do not, which is that him being clockable will not ruin his whole life the way that Put and Jeng as famous, prominent people would run the gauntlet if that information were to get out. Put says it himself in Episode 8: “A famous person like you might not be able to come out a lot, right?”

Jeng isn’t clockable as queer to the average person, and as Pat has been actively trying not to read into things, and has been trying to rein in his own horniness for Jeng, Jeng isn’t clockable to him either. SO…all of this to say that Pat feels that Put was not straightforward with their love, and that Jeng has been disguising all of his attempts at wooing Pat under a safety blanket of work. So Pat is feeling primarily hurt, lied to, and betrayed. 

So, what we end up getting with Jeng is…manipulation. He has manipulated every situation to get Pat and him alone together, while at the same time not clueing Pat in to the fact that is what he was doing. While additionally not clueing Pat in to the fact he is gay. While also not clueing Pat into the fact that he’s Jaab’s brother until Pat literally walks into the middle of an interaction between Jaab and Jeng. While also not initially clueing Pat in to the fact he is Pat’s boss even after Jeng realized. 

The past two people that Pat has been interested in have manipulated him over and over again. 

His coworkers have manipulated him over and over again. 

How else is Pat supposed to see Jeng not being explicit about his feelings? He’s being manipulated once again by Jeng not saying anything. 

Chot lets Pat know that he can talk to him about anything, and Pat says “it’s ok, it’ll pass”. 

Why is that relevant? CAUSE OF PARALLELS THAT COME LATER. 

Anyway, Pat is giving an explicit invitation to talk about his feelings, and he brushes it off. Because Chot is an office friend in his office where his boss who he is having feelings about works, and Pat is very much oblivious to the fact that any gay within a 20 mile radius can see what is going on between Pat and Jeng. So he thinks he can’t be honest. Because that puts him and Jeng both in a sticky situation. 

So he puts on a brave face, because he thinks that he can, because Jeng isn’t supposed to be in the office today. Because Chot told Pat that Jeng was out and Chot was covering. (Yet another reason why Pat may not want to talk to Chot about Jeng, Chot is literally acting as his boss right now). Because the thoughts Pat is having, the feelings that he is having, they are manageable so long as Pat does not have to face Jeng…

Except Jeng appears. On a day that he is most definitely not supposed to be here. They are at working, they are at work. Jeng does exactly what Pat has just indirectly told Chot he wishes someone would do. 

He pulls a “boyfriend” and gives his jacket to his freezing love interest. 

Now, is this something Jeng would do in the office? I fucking hope not. But currently, Jeng and Pat are sitting in the back of a dark room, with literally all the other queer people in the office. This is a safe space, this is a shelter. It’s why and how Jeng and Pat’s closeness has progressed in the most recent episodes. Because they have been away from the physical office space, around the straight and sometimes homophobic coworkers, and instead, on set with literally every gay boy known to Man. Jeng knows Chot knows, Jeng knows Jaab knows, having realized that Pat had no idea that he was gay, Jeng has decided he has been approaching things wrong, and gets bolder. 

But, Pat has a) still not processed everything, b) is still oblivious to the fact that everyone around him knows exactly what is happening, c) is in the office, and d) is in the office with JENG who Pat was explicitly told would not be there. So you can imagine the stress he is under, and you can imagine with his track-record of manipulative men, that he is thinking very much that Jeng is playing with his emotions. 

Because Jeng is playing with his emotions. Not intentionally. But Pat himself has never experienced this particular set of challenges before and Jeng is always on the brain. Pat’s emotional state is out of whack and it is at least 50% Jeng’s fault. Pat, again very maturely, hands that token of affection off to Chot, so that it will seem like nothing. So that it will read as nothing to anyone around him. Because Pat doesn’t know that they know. 

Pat, who has still not had the opportunity to get the time and space that he needs from Jeng, because his parents are in town on an extended stay, because he had to go back to work eventually, because Jeng is now right there, once again does the mature thing, and walks away from the situation. He makes space. 

Jeng follows after him, which again, makes it extremely obvious that Jeng is acting inappropriately close to Pat. But Jeng knows everyone in the room knows, which is why he can get away with it. But Pat just wants to be alone and Jeng is not letting him. 

They retreat to an isolated corner. Where they have one of the juiciest conversations to date: 

Jeng: “Did I make you uncomfortable in any way?’

Pat: “No, I’m just tired,” 

Jeng: “Is it my fault?” 

Pat: “No,” 

Jeng: “I’m sorry” 

Pat: “Why are you saying sorry to me, when I said it wasn’t your fault?” 

Jeng: “You didn’t answer my text, ever since that day”

Pat: “Mr. Jeng, could you stop texting me? If it’s not work related. Don’t invite me to go eat. Don’t drop me off at home.”

And Pat says all of this without making eye contact with Jeng. When he finally does look up? He can see how devastated Jeng looks.

It confuses him in fact, to see this strong of an emotional reaction to Pat drawing these boundaries. Because, while Pat has not explicitly stated this yet, he thinks Jeng is fucking with him. This reaction is running very counter to what Pat is anticipating from this conversation. 

So he has to say something else to fill the silence, and to soften the blow: 

“Uh…I want to thank you. Thank you for everything. But please don’t do it again. Especially in front of everyone.”

“I can’t say no.” 

And I take this two ways coming from Pat. First that Jeng being his boss puts Pat in the terrible situation of potentially not feeling comfortable saying no to Jeng. Because Jeng has power over Pat, even though we all know (or I at least hope based on this entire show so far) that Jeng is not the type of person that would take a personal vendetta out on Pat for rejecting his advances in the office” 

Which is why I want to take a secondary lens to this conversation, and read that “I can’t say no” line as a double entendre. Jeng has let Pat know he is gay, Pat has placed all of their interactions into the context of that new information, Pat has realized that Jeng has been pursuing him this whole time. Pat realizes there may be reciprocated feelings involved. Pat tells Chot indirectly that he wants someone to be straightforward in their love. Jeng gives him the jacket. Pat has now been offered a much more clear admission from Jeng about his interest. Pat has feelings for Jeng. Pat has very strong feelings for Jeng. Pat hangs off of Jeng at every given opportunity the second he is out of his head. If Jeng pursues him, if Jeng is genuinely interested in him, if these feelings he has are reciprocated, and Jeng does not give Pat space. Pat will give in to his feelings and they will start an incredibly inappropriate workplace relationship. 

Pat can’t say no because Jeng is his boss, and Pat can’t say no because he’s been DTF from the moment he laid his eyes on Jeng. 

And again, I argue that Pat has actually been navigating this entire situation incredibly maturely. He removes himself from situations where he may be seen engaging in inappropriate workplace relations, and sets firm boundaries around what type of contact he and Jeng can have. 

Pat tries to leave, Jeng pulls him back, wraps him in a hug, and does the thing Pat wishes people would do and is straightforward in his love for Pat: 

Gif from @bellepark

Now here is where shit gets fun (read: terrible) for Pat emotionally. Because, ya know, he hasn’t already been dealing with enough shit. Pat sees Jeng: handsome, rich, successful, talented and cannot possibly fathom a reality where Jeng is actually in to him, a 25 year old in his first job, no wealth, no successful business ventures, who is feeling very much like the is untalented because of Chris’ mom on the commercial set. Jeng is everything, Jeng has everything, what could Pat possibly offer?

Gif from @bellepark

It legitimately does not compute. It is far, far simpler for Pat to assume that Jeng is fucking with him, toying with his emotions, possibly even trying to get Pat to admit to feelings so he can turn around and have him fired. 

And If it is true that Jeng likes him, then how much has Jeng’s crush impacted his ability to accurately critique Pat? Was Pat only told that he was doing a good job by Jeng because Jeng had a crush? Was Pat given the commercial spot because Jeng had a crush? Is Pat even good at anything or does Jeng just want to fuck him and is therefore elevating his positions in order to leverage Pat’s growing importance to get Pat to do what he wants?  

Pat has spent too much time lately being manipulated and being bullied and that is where he is coming from in his interaction with Jeng here. He is young, he does not understand what Jeng could possibly, legitimately want in a relationship with him, and if he lets himself believe that it makes sense for them to be together, then he will not be able to stop himself from getting in to a very dicey HR situation.

Jeng goes home, has a #hotgirlmeltdown and this is where I bring up the parallel that Pat told Chot “It’ll pass” and unfortunately for me Gaga has made it so that when I screenshot I get a black screen so I can’t capture the translation there. But I will just write it down: 

“I can handle it…I think I can…I’m fine,” 

It reminds me of Pat saying “it’s okay, it’ll pass” 

Both of them are lying, but Pat was detached from his feelings when he lied whereas Jeng is consumed by his. 

But this is not about Jeng, this is about Pat so we are gonna cut to Jen’s going away party. 

Pat is wearing the same outfit as when Jeng confessed and Pat rejected Jeng so we know that Pat is coming in to this party riding a massive emotional wave, and trying to temper that storm. Because he doesn’t have time to process that right now, because this is Jen’s party, and because Ae sees Jen sulking and hands Pat the responsibility of talking with him: 

Pat is gonna have to compartmentalize whatever feelings he is having to go handle Jen’s emotional state. 

The significant beats I picked up on in this conversation with Jen are the following: 

Pat saying he wished he had a home in another province to go back to 

Jen saying it is a safe zone for him 

Pat having the reality of being able to run away from his problems immediately crushed by Jen saying that he cannot pursue his dreams back home because everything is in Bangkok 

Pat having the reality of being able to run away from his problems crushed again when Jen says “Well, everything is here and look at how bad it is” 

Jen brushes off his own feelings and asks Pat how he is doing, and here is the crucial part. Huge shout out to @lurkingshan for pointing this out in a conversation we had last night. Jen is quitting. Jen is no longer a coworker to Pat. Pat has someone who is gay, who is no longer going to be involved in company business, and who is moving home to another province and therefore Pat can feel comfortable being honest because Jen is about to become very detached from his world.

“I don’t know, I’m very confused,” Pat says. And this is the first time he has voiced an emotion since he told Jeng he was sad about his break up with Put.

“Is it Mr. Jeng?” 

Pat has his shit rocked by Jen asking him about Jeng so casually, like it is no big deal, like he is In The Know. Pat has really been operating under the assumption that no one could tell he had a crush on Jeng. 

“These two brothers are the same” Jen gets it. Jen is telling Pat he gets it, and he’s telling Pat that neither Jeng nor Pat have been slick. 

“I don’t know, it’s like he’s playing with my feelings,” 

And I know this line may be a point of confusion for some people, because we know that Jeng is being sincere. We know, as an audience, how much of a fucking simp Jeng is for Pat. Jeng would crawl on his hands and knees for Pat. Jeng would almost certainly renounce his family and his title and his wealth for Pat. And if we didn’t get that from the last eight episodes, we are explicitly told how much Jeng likes Pat immediately before this scene. Pat consumed every waking thought in Jeng’s head. WE know this. Pat does not. 

Pat thinks Jeng is playing with his feelings because of what I outline earlier re: all the manipulation Pat has been through recently with MLM guy, with Put, and with the situations Jeng has manipulated to get them alone together. 

Pat believes Jeng is too good to be true, because he’s moved past the stage in the office job where he was so burnt out, stressed out, and exploited that every piece of constructive criticism felt like a personal attack. Pat isn’t angry at his workplace anymore, and therefore isn’t channeling his rage at Jeng anymore, and therefore isn’t focusing on Jeng’s flaws anymore, and as a result thinks Jeng reciprocating Pat’s feelings is too good to be true. Also because Pat doesn’t trust himself. Pat doesn’t see the parts of himself that Jeng sees. Pat doesn’t know why Jeng would like hin because Pat doesn’t understand the ways in which Pat brings life and joy and play in to Jeng’s otherwise extremely serious, almost entirely work-related life. 

But Jen will not let Pat have that. Jen is older, Jen is wiser, Jen is an outside, relatively neutral third party where Pat and Jeng are concerned (Jaab is a whole ‘nother story). Jen can understand where and how Jeng and Pat are good for each other, and as a result he is quick to tell Pat not to sell himself short. 

And he gives one of the most important pieces of advice that he can give to Pat is that if Jeng truly likes him, he’d find a way to tell Pat. 

This singular piece of advice is going to save their relationship I tell you. 

Whatever hope, whatever resolve that Pat has to navigate this storm. To figure out if Jeng actually likes him, if Jeng will do something that convinces Pat that he’s serious is crushed the instant Chot tells Pat that Jeng resigned. 

Now, those of us in the workforce should be screaming “FUCK YEAH!” because Jeng is taking the responsible adult route by stepping away from his role as boss. Which, if Pat and Jeng were to get together would eliminate any conflict of interest, and if Pat and Jeng weren’t to get together would eliminate any fears Pat would have about Jeng a) harassing him b) firing him or c) retaliating for Pat’s previous rejection. 

But…to Pat?! Well, he’s just ruined Jeng’s life. Jeng quit his job, from the company that he built. Pat understands that between Jeng’s position and Pat’s position, Pat is by far the more replaceable of the two. This is Jeng’s family’s company. Pat has realized that he fucked up. Pat is realizing that Jeng is not overstepping boundaries because he is trying to harass Pat, but because he has genuine feelings because the second Pat said to keep it work-only Jeng up and fucking left so that Pat wouldn’t have to worry about seeing him around. 

Pat is thinking, Pat is contemplating, Pat is dissociating, and as he goes to wander like a zombie back to his house at the end of the day, SURPRISE Happy Birthday, Pat! Mr. Jeng baked you a cake! 

AND THIS IS A LOT TO PROCESS CONSIDERING THAT PAT FORGOT HIS OWN BIRTHDAY! But Jeng remembered, and Jeng made something for him. I would love to go on and on and on and on about the lighting in this scene, but this write up is, as usual, far far longer than I anticipated, and a lot of the lighting details were covered in this phenomenal post by @istanchan

So we are just gonna go with the major take away from this scene. The flame is ignited between Pat and Jeng, Jeng is out of focus, and when Pat blows out the candles, extinguishing the flame, Jeng comes in to focus. Pat is now forced to face his feelings about Jeng, in a way he has been desperately trying to suppress for however long of a time frame this episode covers. 

Pat goes home, yet again dissociating because the second that he reattaches his consciousness to his body he knows its fucking over. 

And at this point, Pat has exhausted all avenues. He tried to get over his initial crush on Jeng by dating Put, and realized that he was not actually interested in that relationship. He tried to give himself distance and time to process his emotions immediately following the coming out incident, and was interrupted by his mother, he tried to brush off his feelings in the hope that they would pass, he returned to work and tried to get back into the groove of things under the safe assumption that Jeng would not be there, only to have Jeng show up. He asked Jeng to keep their interactions work related only to have Jeng hug him and tell him he really likes him, he started to have a conversation about his feelings with the only person who would understand, who is about to leave the province, and he maybe is feeling a bit better, and certainly more resolved. We can tell that also in the way that Pat approaches Jeng’s office after his talk with Jen, only to have the rug pulled out from under him with the update that Jeng has resigned. 

He has tried and tried and tried to get over Jeng. He has tried and tried and tried to convince himself that Jeng can’t actually possibly like him back. This man has tried. And he can’t take it anymore. He sits down, his parents sing him happy birthday, they immediately pick up on the fact that Pat isn’t doing well, and they ask the fateful question: 

And this is the first time Pat has really had to sit and process everything. This is the point where he settles down, both exhausted and having exhausted all other options…and everything hits at once. 

“This is the year I forgot my own birthday” my life has been so busy and chaotic I have fully lost track of time (starting a new job, being exploited at new job, getting new boss, getting micromanaged by new boss, being hate crimed at work by my coworkers, best friend gets pregnant, working to get Forge client secured, trying to do 90% of the labor in a one sided relationship with Put, filming Forge commercial and trying to convince the Forge people that he is competent)

“I even forgot that you’d come back to see me every year,” I am a bad child for forgetting my parents would come to visit. 

“It’s like I focused on everything except myself,” I have been avoiding my own feelings and focusing on others (i have been suppressing my feelings for Jeng, I have been trying to put those feelings elsewhere, I poured all my energy in to work and in to the MLM guy and in to Put)

“But I don’t know how to deal with this feeling,” I have tried fucking everything I know to manage my emotional state, which I know is already a weak spot of mine and something I am actively working on and nothing I have tried has brought me even remotely close to working through these emotions. 

His parents immediately jump in to help, but the problem is Pat without context is not making a ton of sense, and the only thing they really have to latch on to is “I don’t know how to deal with this feeling” and his parents give him a hard truth. 

“You can’t escape anywhere.” 

It was something that Pat started to realize in his conversation with Jen, when he told Jen he wished he had a house to escape to, and Jen reminded him that he could have no dreams there. But Jen is heartbroken and fleeing from the bad things in his life, so it hits a little different when Pat’s parents, who he loves, who seem to generally have their lives together, who are divorced but still clearly get along, who love and care for one another despite no longer being married, and who are emotionally very mature, and shining examples to Pat of how to navigate emotional turmoil look right at him and say “you can’t escape this feeling,” 

And Pat has a breakdown. 

Which, in my opinion, makes complete and total sense and is incredibly justified considering everything that he has been through in recent months. Everything that he has been trying to navigate and manage while he is alone in another country, away from his family, with no friends to talk to because of the ways they are connected to him. 

And doesn’t it just suck that you finally have the people who have supported you all your life look right at you and be unable to do anything but hold you through your tears. Physically he has support, but there is no way out of these emotions but through them. 

This is the release, and he still has a lot of shit to sort out, but he’s had a good cry and he’s ready to press on. He goes shopping with Ae, and while he does still seem distracted, he is doing better, he is participating in conversation rather than fully dissociating, he is teasing her (“can i have that cake?”) so he is moving more towards a point of equilibrium. Ae has her baby, makes him an uncle, and that is enough to shake Pat out of the depression spiral he has been in because look at the amazing miracle of life he has just witnessed. 

He returns home from another chaotic and exhausting evening (helping his bestie deliver her baby on the back of a bus #casual) and finds a package waiting for him. 

An incredibly well utilized in-universe ad, of a snack Pat mentioned he liked once, in passing, months ago to Jeng. Jeng has always paid attention to Pat, and I don’t know how much attention Pat has allowed himself to pay to Jeng that would get him to realize that. It’s the aspect of this whole thing that Pat has not been ready or willing to acknowledge. Because the second he realizes that Jeng is gay, the depth of Jeng’s engagement and focus on Pat becomes a lot more clear.

Pat find the happy birthday note from Jeng and collapses on to the bed surrounded by the snacks to think about things. 

To think, in particular, about what Jen said about Jeng finding ways to show he cares if he is serious. 

It cuts to Jeng, who is being driven to the brink of madness, who has been trying to maintain distance, but needs more than life itself to let Pat know that he is serious. It has been days, days at least since he has last spoken to Pat, and he cannot stop thinking about the final thing Pat said to him “Why do you like me, it doesn’t make sense,” 

Jeng sends this message

And the episode ends before we see Pat get that text. I am very excited to see his reaction when he reads that, surrounded by wasabi peas. 

Now, maybe I am way way overanalyzing all of this because I will always come to Pat’s defense, maybe I am trying to convince people that if you just follow the lines and the lights and the body language everything you need to understand Pat is right there because there are so many parts of Pat that live in me, (though many that don’t), maybe I am blind to where the gaps in this episode rest when it comes to how they wrote Pat’s story, but I didn’t need more explicitly stated moments for Pat leading up to this breakdown because, well…

It makes sense to me. 

(thank you to anyone who made it to the end, I recognize this is a long post even for me, haha oopsie. I would be unsurprised if I hit 10 hours total of work on this post between screen-shotting, double checking scenes, and writing it)

[andi-dromeda]

I’m obsessed with Jaygrant so ofc I had to ship them here too. In this au they start off as kind of colleagues. Grant sees this as a gig where he just has to humour whatever mediation, magic stuff Jason’s got going on and collect a pay check. Jason sees Grant as an assassin he can turn into a monk. I’d say Jason probably starts out training Grant and Tara the way he’s used to being trained, brutally and bossily. He gives orders but quickly realises it isn’t working because Tara and Grant both aren’t listening to him, Tara keeps threatening to go home and Grant keeps saying he needs a pay raise every time Jason tells him to do something. Luckily, Jason’s adaptable and begins to treat them more like equals who just need the right approach to become all caste members. He realises Tara likes to learn more about the culture and practices of the all caste instead of the fighting (not that she’s not interested in the combat, it’s just that all the experiments and clubs have left her with a bad opinion of most types of training). Grant is far more interested in the fighting, loves hearing about the All Castes victories over the untitled and after hearing about Jason killing the devourer of young souls Grant can’t help but gain some respect for the guy. Grant and Tara still like to provoke each other so Jason tries to mostly train them one on one giving both of them a lot of free time. Jason and Tara begin to bond over random recipes their mothers taught them and stories about living on the streets. Jason and Grant start to bond over weapons and fighting.

Then they discover they’re all gods and their souls weren’t just similar in that they all died. From here the group dynamic starts to shift. They see each other as more interconnected now. Before this they all chose to be here. Sure Jason would bite his tongue more than he normally would because he couldn’t find anyone else with a soul similar to his but he still felt like he was mostly in control of the situation. Now they knew this was all some grand destiny. Everything that had come before was simply preparing them for ascension. Jason and Tara are both bothered by the idea of losing their humanity but Grant isn’t. For Jason and Tara they want to right the wrongs that were done to them but now that means they’d lose their humanity and become gods. Grant on the other hand doesn’t care about his humanity and the wrongs he has to right are with his parents who he has literally been in hiding for a year at this point because of. This causes a fracture in the group. Tara decides to visit the Wilson’s for a bit and think about her options but Grant is eagerly pursuing godhood. Grant sees figuring out how to kill Slade as his only obstacle and is frankly ecstatic. Jason decides to keep an eye on Grant and they go on Grant’s very own murder world tour.

During their trip, Jason starts to see a lot of himself in Grant. Especially because he’s been where Grant is now. I mean they’re literally travelling across the world trying to find the best way to kill Grant’s mysterious dad who he won’t even say the name of. One night they have to crash in a random motel (which Grant forces him to pay for) and oh no, only one bed! Jason doesn’t care that much after having to share a bed with Kyle and Donna for ages when Kyle actively wanted him dead. Grant maybe flirts a little (not in a romance way though) but Jason shuts him down. Unfortunately, neither of them can sleep so end up talking about their dads. Jason mentions B and his birth dad Willis (I’m team Willis was a good screw the retcons so at least Jason had one good dad). Grant mentions how his dad was always going on mysterious trips and when he was around he was abandoning his son in the woods or taking the sink or swim teaching style to literally everything. It’s the most vulnerable either of them have been in a long time but since they can barely see each other in the dark and since they don’t even know each other’s last names or aliases there’s an almost anonymity. They feel safer to open up to each other than anyone else. This is when I imagine they’d start tentatively considering each other friends.

Then during their globe trotting adventure Jason comes across some scientists developing a weapon to kill Deathstroke. He decides to try steal the weapon and stop the research in case it gets used against Rose so he tells Grant about his plan to steal it. Then Grant is suddenly very interested. He asks a lot of questions like: “who’s Rose?” “How many kids does he even have!?” “Rose is Ravager!?” “He gave you his approval? Like for free?” “He sent you a postcard for Christmas!?” Grant has a million thoughts swirling through his head so when they go on the mission, Jason tries to get Grant to hang back. Grant doesn’t listen, rushes in and to save Grant from his own idiocy, Jason takes a bullet for Grant. Everything’s on fire, explosions are going off and Grant then has to choose in the heat of the moment to either stop the weapon from getting crushed (Jason already destroyed all the research so it can’t be replicated) or save Jason from getting crushed. Jason would normally be able to push through the blood loss but everything’s feeling a tad bit too familiar so he’s a bit occupied at the moment. And Grant makes his choice before he even has the time to consider it. As soon as he heard Jason’s cries he forgot all about the weapon. Grant saves Jason from the collapsing lab (that for thematic purposes was hidden in a warehouse) and without even thinking about it chose Jason over ascension and revenge two of the most important things to him.

When Jason manages to cool down after everything, he states more than asks Grant is Slade’s son. Grant says “biologically, yes unfortunately. But from what you’ve described he sounds like he’s much more fatherly to you than he ever was to me.”

“Then why did you chose me? You could’ve saved the weapon, killed Slade and become a god. Why… me?” A long uncomfortable silence hung between them. Jason’s barely dried eyes shimmered in the dim hotel room. He looked confused. Why? If he could get even a heartless bastard like Slade to like him how could he ever be surprised that someone cared about him?

“I didn’t chose you. I didn’t chose at all. I just did it. You know?”

And that was the moment Jason fell for Grant. Because he’d replayed the night with Joker and Bruce in his head a thousand times. He’d purposefully put Bruce through hell before the confrontation. Then bludhaven blew up. Then the rest was a blur and the only thing that felt solid was the sharp pain against his neck. The slow trickle dropping down his throat as he lay under the rubble. He went over the night again and again and tried to excuse the batarang. Bruce was stressed, he wasn’t thinking and of course he was never going to choose Jason. Bruce always thinks he can find a better option. Of course he’d try to have his cake and eat it too. Bruce was simply too used to getting what he wanted. (Maybe that’s why Jason didn’t tell Bruce he’d killed him. Because if Bruce knew that Jason would just keep coming back, then he wouldn’t even have to pretend he saw a Jason as anything more than canon fodder. Anything more than a good soldier.)

But Grant picked him. Grant didn’t even think about it. Grant owed him nothing. At most Jason was a convenient pay check and occasional confidant. Yet Grant chose Jason over the thing he valued most. When Jason started to choke up again, Grant didn’t say anything. He just opened his arms and held Jason until the morning. They didn’t speak about it but actions always speak louder. Grant for the first time since they’d met payed for their breakfast. He surprises Jason with tickets to some play Jason had mentioned liking during a sparring match a while back. He takes Jason out for a night on the town with Jade and only slightly makes fun of him for never going to a club unless he owned it.

Where Jason fell all at once and then decided to not do anything about it (he’s not shy he just can’t risk losing such a promising new member!), Grant fell slower. Granted, he didn’t notice. Due to internalised homophobia and a healthy does of Slade’s special home made brand of toxic masculinity, Grant has a weird perception of relationships. He kind of sees having a wife and kids as just boxes you have to tick off at some point distantly in the future and that romance didn’t last long. He hoped it did when he was younger. As a kid he’d dream about finding a partner and both being so devoutly in love he’d never have to guess if he was good enough. But none of his girlfriends could ever fix him (not for a lack of trying), he couldn’t force things to be better and so he came to the conclusion that love was just a fleeting infatuation. When he heard Jade’s troubles with Roy, his perspective was only further cemented.

So when he starts falling for Jason he doesn’t realise what he’s feeling. He thinks Jason’s hot and makes no attempt to hide that doesn’t think much of it. Grant was okay with being attracted to guys so long as it was purely physical. If it was just lust than it was just about pleasure. No need to further inspect anything he might be feeling. He’s just a completely hetero guy with functioning eyes. I mean come on, can you blame him for noticing Jason’s thighs? But then one random day Grant was eating something Jason had cooked (because Grant would burn the house down if he so much as glanced at a blender) and realised he wanted to do this everyday. He wanted to wake up to Jason in one of his safe houses that only had one bed so he didn’t have to think about it. He wanted Jason to make breakfast and it’d be delicious as always. Then they’d clean their weapons and talk about random cape drama and fight over whatever thing Grant chose that morning (because there was nothing more entertaining than giving Jason such stupid arguments that Jason couldn’t even respond and then saying the silence was just proof he was right). He wanted to be by Jason’s side on the field, on the matts, on that one cruise that was secretly smuggling rare beanie babies, on the dance floor when they were both too drunk to care about making absolute fools of themselves, on the roof of the van they stole from Penguin’s Metropolis branch and even on the bathroom floor heaving his guts into the toilet whist Jason smugly said “I told you so” and Grant was in too much pain from the vomiting and hangover to come up with a witty retort. The revelation shocked him and he called Jade for an emergency evacuation. She “saved” him, punched him for worrying her, took him out for coffee and told him to get himself together.

So now they both like each other so what could possibly go wrong now? :D

Tara comes back and invites them to meet her family. They do and suddenly Grant and Tara hate each other even more than usual and now they have to deal with the Wilson family issues. :0

Also imagine Rose’s perspective. Your ex boyfriend comes to your family dinner with you dead brother (who you never met and took the legacy title of) hates you and your other sister who apparently has been having philosophical debates with these guys says they’re all gods and your brother has to kill your dad to ascend so now you have to just try to eat your food whilst everyone flips out and you see your ex making heart eyes at the dead brother.

[nenynrawrites]

Comfortable ~ Steven Adler x Reader

Summary: Steven gets home from tour, and tells (and shows) you, what he's been up to

Wordcount: 1564 words

Warnings: Smut involving Steven being subby and being jerked off, gender neutral! reader, reader is the dom

A/N: This was written for @popcorn-adler2 , as both me and him went crazy over Steven, and especially this idea! This is my very first story on here, so feedback is appreciated!:D

,,Tadaa!''

,,What- Oh my god, Stevie!''

,,I look good, right?''

You were sitting on you two's bed, a book in hand, as Steven, after what felt like hours, emerged from the bathroom, a thick fog enveloping him, which subsided after a few seconds. Stepping closer to the bed, you might've, just might've, stare a little too long, eliciting a smirk from him. But hey, if you were his partner, you, too, would do it. He's a beauty after all!

,,According to you eyes, I do, so don't try and fight it!''

,,You wanna give me attitude over a scare?''

,,Pff, no, why would I?''

,,Good boy.''

He blushed, a strawberry red crawling over his face and parts of his neck and chest, which made it seem like the leftover condensation was boiling away from his body, the curly hair drying.

Picking up and putting on a new set of boxers, you dwelled in his sight, because to you, he's just such a beauty, but there were certain parts which you found the most cute...Especially his ass.

,,What'd you wanna watch?''

,,How about Police Academy?''

,,Sounds good!''

Putting the VHS into the player, Steven moved to sit in between his lover's legs, yourself sitting against the headboard, as your pre-occupied hands are now on his chest, moving to lightly scratch over his arms, before moving down to his waist, starting to tickle him (yes, he's ticklish!:D)

,,H-H-Hey! S-S-S-Stop!''

,,No, you look cute! Unless you overwhelm me, then I'll stop.''

,,B-Bet!''

Trying his best to wiggle out, he managed to get free of your grasp, pinning your hands to your sides, as he kneeled in front of you, one leg on each side, a sweet grin on his face.

,,I'll get you next time.''

,,Promise?''

,,Promise!''

Enclosing their lips in a sweet kiss, he moved to sit on your legs, his arms around your neck, whilst yours were on his hips, pulling him closer.

,,You know, we've got a film to watch...''

,,Fuck it, I wanna do this the whole duration of it...''

,,We can do that...''

It had been a bit since the pair had time with each other, let alone seen each other, and even with trying to sneak away or jus trying to get a quiet minute was deemed impossible. That's the only thing Steven and you hated about touring.

~ Lil flashback ~

,,You don't know how much I miss you...''

,,I know, I miss you, too...But there's only two days left, and I'm gonna pick you up from the airport, remember?''

,,Yeah...Speaking of come...Can we?''

,,Yes, we can.''

It it would've been for him, he would've taken you with onto the whole tour, but give your job and your pets, it wouldn't have worked out. Plus the stress of being in another city, another state, let alone another country in just mere days...He wouldn't want that stress for you. Though during the whole tour, he managed to have you flown out to a few big shows, letting you cheer him on from the side of the stage, and you could've sworn he played even stronger.

But that was the smallest downside: Physical contact was what he missed the most. What the both of you missed the most. The times you had been flown out weren't long enough, knowing that sometimes you already had gone back home, and that Steven would wake up to an empty bed.

Daily phone calls were a must, and whenever you two got a chance to talk alone without the boys barging in ('cause, lets be honest, they'd try to the second they knew), it often escalated to phone sex, and just...Welcomed a new idea into your sex life...And the amount of times you had thought Steven had been caught are unreal (every second, to be exact), but it was mostly a weird movement he made, making the sheets rustle, or the rings on the curtain rod rattle. Though once one of the boys, you supposed it to be Duff, made an off-handed comment about how he should ,,stop jerking off all the time.'' He later found out, that Duff was just talking in his sleep.

~ Flashback ends ~

,,You know, I really wanna watch the film...''

,,You don't wanna watch me?:0''

,,Of course I wanna watch you, baby! Sit down like before, alright? Just wanna be close to you...I love you.''

,,I love you, too, sweetheart.''

Sitting back down, Steven opted to lay his legs over yours, his hands over your thighs, and his head buried in your shoulder, as you gave him little kisses all over his face, and wherever you could reach.

~ Little time skip to about half an hour later~

Feeling like, and actually having, burst into tears, the scene just kept getting better and better, and the both you could've sworn, that at this point, none of you had had any air left, nor tears.

,,Jeez, fuck...Wait, stop the movie, I need a break...I don't think I have any air left...''

,,Me neither...''

The scene, which the film was stopped on, showed one of the cadets dressed up in a bath robe and bath cap, with a towel on his arm, peering into the women's shower from outside the building.

,,I hope you didn't do that...''

,,Did what?''

,,Watch other women like the guy there...''

,,I wouldn't dare! You're way more beautiful than all of them...And I made sure I took enough photos of you with me...'Cause the memory of your body wasn't enough, I had to see it...''

If this wasn't a declaration of love, you wouldn't know what it is.

Steven gave you his famous Popcorn smile, at which you couldn't help but look away in nervosity, at which he made you face him, by softly grabbing your chin, kissing you.

,,Stevie, baby, tell me what you did when I wasn't around...When we weren't calling...I wanna know everything...''

,,Everything?''

,,Everything...I'd love to see it, too...''

None of you were doing anything, just basking in the silence, observing every little feature of each other, and it got more beautiful by the second...There was a little scruff on Steven's face, from the last few day, his bangs grew longer, too, basically covering his baby blue eyes, but making it look magical, as he's still looking up at you through them, your eyes trailing down over his cute button nose to his mouth, with the softest lips you could think of.

,,Sometimes I'd just look at a picture of you, and just tease myself at most. Just...Trailing over it, maybe holding it, but I didn't dare move it, and-''

He took a sharp breath in, as your hand ghosted over his boxers, before moving under them, having played with the waistband. And oh, did it feel good to touch his dick, no matter how many times you've done it.

,,Go on, honey.''

,,And I- I just thought of all the things we've done, and that you've said on the phone, and- And- Fuck!''

His eyes flutter shut, as you had taken his cock out of his boxers, the slightly cold air giving him a rush through his entire body, as you slowly stroked it, barely putting pressure on it.

,,And?''

,,And I- I would suck my fingers, y-you know, spit into my hand and stroke it, thinking--Haaah--Thinking it was your hand.''

It had been a few minutes at this point, but for Steven, it felt like hours. The poor boy could never really get off, and sometimes he'd cum two, three times, if not more, just so he could feel satisfied, since it wasn't you who was doing it.

,,You're such a good boy, taking it so well...''

,,Your good boy...''

,,That's right...Want it faster? Or slower? Hm?''

,,Faster, please!''

Speeding up, you could see the first few little beads of pre-cum oozing out, making sure to use it as an extra lubricant.

,,Hnng, I think I'm gonna cum-''

,,Not yet, baby, only when I tell you to.''

,,Please, I- I n-need to!''

,,Be a good boy and I'll let you.''

Steven had thought, with all the time apart, that you would have a little mercy on him, but he knows how you can be. But he loves it, and wouldn't want it any other way.

,,You know how to...Just a little bit more...''

,,P-Please!''

The once fast speed changed to a lazy stroke, not daring to touch his tip, where he wanted and needed it the most. His face and parts of his chest had turned red, but you couldn't figure out, if it was from blushing, or just the overstimulation. His tongue was hanging out, and he was panting, his chest rising like crazy. His hands were all over, wanting to direct you how he wanted it, but he knew you would deny him to cum, so he just opted to grab at your thighs, probably leaving marks, with how hard he was gripping them.

,,That's my good boy...Come on, cum for me, you did so well...''

,,Thank you, thank you, thank you!''

One, two strokes more, and the ropes flew out, coating your hand, part of his thighs and his stomach, as you stroked him through it, kissing him softly, praising him.

,,Did so good, baby, looked so beautiful...Do you want to take a bath, or just stay a little bit longer?''

,,Wanna go again...''

,,Again?''

,,Yes!''

,,As you wish.''