#awful project my beloved Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[willowjay07]

The Big Bean haunts me.

[welcometololaland]

10 things - 2024/2025 edition

happy new year, everyone! 2024 has been a year of change for me in so many different ways, and i've posted very little fic this year, mostly due to writers' block and time constraints. so, instead of doing the writing round up i thought i'd list 10 things i'm grateful for in 2024 (fandom edition) and 10 things i want to do in 2025 (also, fandom edition). please feel free to make your own if you wish! consider this an open tag 🏷️

2024 - things i'm grateful for (in fandom, in no particular order)

1. my ride or die friends who deal with my self doubt and breakdowns and (being 100% real) paranoia about situations that simply don't exist - @rmd-writes @celeritas2997 , the popcorn squad and others. wouldn't be writing without your support!

2. the writers who have trusted me to beta for them - @heartstringsduet @basilsunrise @rmd-writes i think i'm forgetting some (so sorry if so). michelle, being with you through first aid was such an amazing experience, and i feel so lucky to have seen you develop as a writer!

3. the people who have read my fics and encouraged me including the wip wednesday and seven sentence sunday tags! - i literally would not be anywhere without you. you actually give me life.

4. the friendships i've made on discord with people who just wanna know me for me and share little snippets of their lives - @reyesstrand and @heartstringsduet the little squirrel photos y'all send me are soul soothers for real! @st-elle-ar and @clottedcreamfudge and @lightningboltreader and @birdclowns for the cat pics! @howtosingit for your commentary and spoiler services 💜

5. the grace given to me by @carlos-in-glasses and @actual-sleeping-beauty - you two are so kind and encouraging and tell me all about your knitting projects even when i go missing for weeks on end. thank you for being my friends <3 and i don't even think you guys know you are both my yarn obsessed friends but you ARE.

6. everyone who has trusted me enough to collab with them on projects - the legends on never the same twice, @rmd-writes @strandnreyes. i loved working with you and i hope you had a positive experience! looking forward to more collabs in 2025.

7. the document gremlins, betas and sensitivity readers i've collected this year - @rmd-writes @strandnreyes @lightningboltreader @celeritas2997 @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut ty ty ty ty some of those fics were in danger of being lost forever but we revived them!

8. @she-walked-away for making me laugh with your hilarious posts and olympia2997 who apparently doesn't exist on tumblr but leaves the most unhinged comments of all time on my fics.

9. everyone who has translated my fics or made art or gifs this year! inspired by you and in awe of you! @donghaian @whatsintheboxmh @heartstringsduet @guardian-angle22 i know there are more i'm so sorry if i've not listed you here!!!

10. everyone in the various fandoms i'm in who have created brilliant works in 2024! i am inspired by your work more than you know <3

2025 - things i want to do (in fandom, in no particular order)

1. read more, and read more broadly. expand my horizons a bit. read things that are a touch outside my go-to zones just to test the waters. read stuff by new authors!

2. spend time co-writing because that's actually my favourite thing to do. i have some things in the pipeline with a couple of people which i hope work out!

3. finish. the. damn. fic. (eurotrip). IT'S SO FREAKING CLOSE.

4. spend more time with my 2019-2021 beloveds - alex and henry. write more rwrb fic. engage in the fandom a bit more.

5. finish the ring-in 2.0 within 1 month of the LS finale (weep).

6. take one hand off the wheel with fandom relationships - my therapist tells me i need to stop trying to control how everyone feels about me and instead let people show me the kind of friendship they're interested in maintaining. scary because i think i may lose some people along the way but OH WELL WE BALL.

7. worry less about the engagement! god! i need to stop looking so much! *shakes fist at self*

8. write a little more regularly with less word count expectations.

9. learn how to be okay with smaller comments (from myself). sometimes i feel terrible if i don't write a damn essay but sometimes it stops me from reading which is horrible!

10. be a better fandom contributor than i was in 2024 - i think continuous growth is important and i'm always open to feedback (as long as it's constructive and genuine)! my mission is to always make a positive contribution and to make people feel good about themselves, and if i can even do that for one person in 2025, i think i will achieve this goal.

ty for the 2024 wrapped tags @hippolotamus @rmd-writes @reyesstrand @emsprovisions @nancys-braids @carlos-in-glasses @lemonlyman-dotcom @alrightbuckaroo @strandnreyes @thisbuildinghasfeelings @whatsintheboxmh @heartstringsduet @firenati0n @cha-melodius. you are real ones! consider this a tag back if you would like to do a 2024/2025 10 things edition.

[sketchy-scribs-n-doods]

"Because none of those sailors have ever described a siren with salt and pepper hair, wrinkles, and flinty eyes that can make a man balk at fifty paces with nothing but a glance. Beautiful faces and voices that can entrance the most stalwart of men, that’s what they talk about. It doesn’t matter if they’re half-right. Where they’re wrong is what matters."

———

My art for this year's OFMD Reverse Big Bang!

Siren!Izzy has always lived in my head rent free, even before s2 when we finally got Con's lovely singing voice on screen, so I just had to make something for it— with a Stizzy focused Steddyhands twist! I'm a sucker for a secret mermaid saving their reluctantly beloved sailor lol.

The lovely @acesaru was the best partner I could have asked for, a talented writer and lovely all around person to collab with! They perfectly capture Izzy's character voice and the banter between Stede and he is an absolute delight lol. The fic they wrote inspired by my art (and many many discord ramblings together lol) is amazing and the second chapter featuring my art drops today!

Please go check it out for yourself and drop a kudos/comment! <3

[demigod-shenanigans]

Summary: “So, are you going to properly introduce us to your daughter anytime soon?” Leo teased, looking down at the newborn. “I mean, baby McLean is cute, but it’s a bit on the nose as far as names go.”

“You called her Em, right?” Jason asked, apparently eager to get a good grade in uncle. “What's that short for?”

“Technically, her name isn’t officially anything yet,” Piper told them, wiggling into a more comfortable sitting position. “But we’d like to name her Emilia, if Leo is okay with it.”

“Huh?” Leo looked from Piper to Reyna to the baby in utter confusion. “She’s your child. Why would you need my permission to name her anything?”

Piper quirked her eyebrows at him like the answer should be obvious. The gears in his head ground to an abrupt halt. His vision started swimming with tears.

“You want to name your kid after me?”

___

Or: Leo and Jason meet Piper and Reyna’s daughter.

Written for @lost-trio-week day 5: Parents

Word Count: 3.8k

Rating: General Audiences

Gentle CW for mentions of childbirth and anxieties surrounding that topic. I personally think this warning might even be overkill, but as per usual with stuff like this, my rule is better safe than sorry.

This fic is once again dedicated to my friend @queenjunothegreat, because Em was originally her baby (shared custody next gen verse my beloved <3) and she was the one who came up with her name. They also came up with the fic title because I’m useless when it comes to titles lmaooo

Soft married Valgrace & Pipeyna. Also lost trio content, obviously, specific focus once again being Leo and Piper’s friendship (can you tell I care so so much about these idiots?)

———

Leo hated hospitals. A hospital was where he’d spent the first few days after his mom’s death, being treated for smoke inhalation, and it was where his first set of awful foster parents had picked him up. 

To say his memories of that time weren’t the fondest would have been the understatement of the century.

And sure, he knew in theory that this was different. New Rome Hospital had a really low death rate for anything that wasn’t battle-related injuries. As far as he knew, there hadn’t been a childbirth-related death here in a century. Realistically, he knew Piper was fine.

Still, the time the rather frazzled-looking Asclepius legacy that had greeted them was taking to figure out where she was and whether it was alright for her to have visitors made Leo’s anxious brain spiral in all kinds of unfun directions.

“Piper might still want to get back at us for the time we both died on her,” he told Jason, anxiously wringing his hands.

His husband raised an eyebrow at him.

“I don’t think she’d die out of spite ten years after the fact,” he commented, squeezing Leo’s hand. “Besides, Reyna said she was doing okay, and you know how she gets about Piper.”

And yeah, alright, that was a fair enough point, but Leo’s anxiety wasn’t exactly great at listening to reason. It never had been.

Nothing would calm him down until he’d seen with his own two eyes that Piper was doing okay.

“If we ever have a kid, we’re adopting,” he sighed into his husband’s shoulder. 

Jason laughed, nuzzling him gently before leaning down to kiss him.

Jason’s lips were a little scabbed from where he had anxiously chewed on them.

“You’re such a hypocrite, you know that, right?” Leo teased, grinning up at his husband. “Thank the gods I got rid of all the staplers, or you might have started chewing on those, too. We cannot have you set that kind of example for baby McLean.”

“Will you ever let that one go?” Jason groaned, rolling his eyes. “I was two.” 

“What kind of husband would I be if I did let it go, hm?” Leo asked, kissing him again.

Someone cleared their throat. A few years back, this might have made them jump apart like embarrassed children, but now, Leo pulled back slowly, eyes lingering on his husband a while longer.

He’d dragged Jason back out of the Underworld by the collar of his stupid school uniform when they’d been seventeen. He was allowed to be disgustingly in love in public. The people could deal.

The Asclepius legacy stood there again, staring down at his clipboard awkwardly. Leo was pretty sure the guy was younger than him—he looked barely older than twenty. 

“Room 201. I wouldn’t recommend staying long—mother and child are both exhausted and will need plenty of rest. And wash your hands before you-”

“Okay, yeah, we’re not complete idiots,” Leo interrupted him. He’d washed his hands four times since getting to the hospital, just because it had given him something to do. 

He was moving in an instant, dragging his husband along with him. Thankfully, his ankle had the decency not to be too much of an ass today.

“You’re going in the wrong direction,” Jason commented, voice tinged with amusement as he pulled him back the way they’d come. 

“Why do you know that?” Leo asked, raising an eyebrow. “Just how much time did you spend here as a kid?”

Jason ignored him and kept walking.

~~~~

Leo wanted to knock on that stupid blue door. Really, he did.

So he wasn’t sure why it was that, instead of knocking, he stuffed his hands into the kangaroo pocket of his hoodie and just stared at the door like a total idiot.

His outfit wasn’t fancy, but it was clean, which was more than could be said for the clothes he’d worn in the workshop earlier that day. He wasn’t as bad as his husband, who Leo had had to talk out of wearing a suit to the hospital because he was worried about making a good first impression, but he was suddenly worried that maybe he still smelled of motor oil. 

The kid would not remember, obviously, but he thought if the first thing he did was upset Piper’s baby, that would still suck. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if they didn’t like him.

Jason squeezed his shoulder. “Mi vida, you're gonna make a great uncle, you know that, right?”

“Duh. I’m incredible,” Leo announced, continuing to stare at the door. 

As always, his husband saw right through him—not that Leo was making it especially hard to do so right now.

“They’re gonna love you. I mean it.” Jason nudged him. “You’re great with the kids we help at the shelter.”

“I mean, I guess,” Leo mumbled, but his shoulders relaxed, just a fraction. “If all else fails, I suppose I can always bribe them with candy once they’re a little older.”

Jason laughed, and Leo finally managed to make himself knock.

It was Reyna who opened the door. She wasn’t even the one who’d had the baby, but she still looked as much of a fucking disaster as Leo had ever seen her. She had deep rings under her reddened eyes and was wearing what Leo was decently sure were rumpled pajamas. Her hair had come loose from its usual neat braid and exploded in messy waves around her shoulders.

“It turns out my daughter is really fond of my hair,” Reyna explained dryly, but there was a softness in her eyes that was usually reserved for Piper. “Come in.”

She moved back to her wife’s bedside in an instant. 

Piper looked… honestly, Leo had seen her look way worse. Her safety scissors bob didn’t look a lot more messy than usual, if he was being honest. Her skin was sweat-damp and she was obviously exhausted, but no one had stabbed her or tried to cook her into soup, which was definitely a plus.

Well, that and the way she was smiling down at the tiny bundle in her arms.

“Hey Pipes,” Leo said, raising his hand in a ridiculous wave as he moved to stand at her side.

“Hey.” Piper smiled up at them. “Glad you guys could make it. I’d wave back, but I’m holding a baby right now, so.”

The baby was small, but in the way Leo assumed newborns usually were. She had just the slightest hint of dark hair and equally dark eyes and was dressed in a small orange onesie.

She was looking right at him.

“She’s got your nose.” Leo paused. “Well, a very tiny copy of your nose. You’ve kept your own nose, as far as I can tell.”

“You’re lucky I love you as much as I do,” Piper sighed, poking her daughter in the nose in question. “Your tío is a bit of an idiot, but you’re going to love him, too. Trust me.”

The baby cooed happily.

“Great.” Leo groaned dramatically. “I’m being bullied by a newborn.”

Piper laughed.

“How are you feeling?” Jason asked, though Leo knew the baby had about 95% of his husband’s attention right now.

Jason had been pulling faces at her literally since they’d walked in the door. 

He’d always been that way around kids, but babies were especially bad. They activated a protective, wildly affectionate parental instinct that Leo had to assume came from Jason’s wolf boy months because he definitely hadn’t gotten it from either of his parents.

It was endearing as hell, but had the unfortunate side effect that it had always made Leo think about a kid of their own, including back when he hadn’t felt even slightly ready for one.

“Exhausted. Content. A little embarrassed.” Piper burst into another fit of tired laughter. “I sort of yelled at my wife to get out. Twice. Which would have been fine, except I was apparently using charmspeak.”

“That you even told her to get out at all seems wildly unfair towards Reyna considering you guys didn’t even have sex,” Leo commented, raising an eyebrow at Piper. “This is, like, objectively not on her.”

Reyna snorted, which was always a massive win in Leo’s book. He’d had a hard time figuring out what sort of jokes made her laugh, and every time he managed, he felt immensely proud of himself.

“Nuh-uh,” Piper protested immediately. “Em may be a magic IVF baby, but she’s a magic IVF baby we both decided to have, so it’s still at least fifty percent Reyna’s fault.”

“That’s a responsibility I will gladly accept. She’s mine and she’s yours and I would not change that for anything in the world.” Reyna pressed a soft kiss to her wife’s forehead. Then she reached down towards her daughter. The baby happily grasped her fingers. 

Reyna’s usual serious expression had melted away into a smile that was so sweet Leo thought it’d give him a toothache. 

“Yeah, okay, we get it, you guys are adorable,” he commented, because he was a total hypocrite when it came to other people’s PDA. “But what I really want to know is how far out of the hospital you got before the charmspeak wore off.”

“The first time I realized by the end of the hallway. The second time I made it all the way out to the parking lot. How Piper had that kind of energy, I’ll never understand.” Reyna shook her head, a kind of quiet awe in her voice. “Though perhaps worse than me leaving for a few minutes was the fact that the second time it happened, it also affected the midwife.”

Jason abruptly stopped pulling faces at Em to look up at Piper with a horrified expression.

“That sounds terrifying. Are you okay?”

“It was scary as hell at the time.” Piper shrugged. “Looking back on it, it's mostly just funny.”

“You continue to be the strongest warrior I know,” Reyna told her fondly, leaning down to kiss her.

“Love, I was an absolute terror and you know it.” Piper beamed at her wife. “You are cute, though, so maybe I’ll allow it.”

“So, are you going to properly introduce us to your daughter anytime soon?” Leo teased, looking down at the newborn again. “I mean, baby McLean is cute, but it’s a bit on the nose as far as names go.”

“You called her Em, right?” Jason asked, apparently eager to get a good grade in uncle. He looked like he might genuinely explode if he didn’t get to hold the baby within the next three seconds, but also like he’d bravely bear that fate because he didn’t want to be rude. “What's that short for?”

“Technically, her name isn’t officially anything yet,” Piper told them, wiggling into a more comfortable sitting position. “But we’d like to name her Emilia, if Leo is okay with it.”

“Huh?” Leo looked from Piper to Reyna to the baby in utter confusion. “She’s your child. Why would you need my permission to name her anything?”

Piper quirked her eyebrows at him like the answer should be obvious.

The gears in his head ground to an abrupt halt. His vision started swimming with tears.

“You want to name your kid after me?” 

Leo hadn’t gone by Emilio since before he’d met Piper. He’d almost forgotten she knew his full name. 

“Only if you’re okay with it,” Piper told him, suddenly looking awkward. “I know why you don’t use the name for yourself, but I figured just naming her Lea might be confusing. Sorry, I probably should have asked you sooner. If you don’t want-”

“No, no, if you guys really want that, I’d be honored. But like- why?” he asked in utter disbelief. “Why me, out of all people?”

“Because you’re my best friend,” Piper said, smiling at him. “Because you’re brave and smart and the best person I know. Because you defied fate and found happiness despite all odds. Because I’ll be lucky if she grows up to be even a little bit like you.”

Leo turned to Reyna. He could feel the tears running down his cheeks. “You’re okay with that?”

Reyna nodded, her expression solemn. “If names really do have power, yours is the greatest blessing we can give her.”

Leo was absolutely bawling his eyes out. His husband wrapped an arm around his shaking shoulders and soothingly ran a hand up and down the length of his arm.

“She’s the luckiest kid in the universe,” Jason told him, pressing a kiss to the back of his head. 

Leo had thought himself a curse for most of his childhood. He’d gotten better about it in recent years, since he’d made peace with his mother’s death and led Jason back out of the Underworld, but the pain had never fully faded.

Piper and Reyna associating his name with joy—choosing it for their daughter to make sure she’d be happy —was hitting him on a level he couldn’t fully process. 

It had been one thing to know on a theoretical level that Piper wanted him to be her child’s godfather—minus the religious connotations. 

But this? To know his best friend not only trusted him with the smallest, most precious human being Leo had ever met, but that she trusted his name to keep her safe? He genuinely didn’t think he would ever recover from that.

“I love you guys,” he sniffled. “So much.”

He knew that was a deeply uncool reaction. Maybe he should have been all smug and braggy about the whole thing. Maybe he would be, later, once everything had properly sunken in.

But right now, he couldn’t stop crying.

”And we love you right back,” Piper said with a soft smile, leaning forward and holding her armful of curious baby out towards him. “You’re not getting out of holding your niece, you know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know.” He sniffled. 

Leo had been terrified of holding Em basically since he knew she existed. He’d never been able to bring himself to hold Percy and Annabeth’s kid, despite all the times they’d babysat back in college. It had been easy enough to pass the job off to Jason, who loved holding babies.

That way, Leo could avoid any potential disasters. No way he could drop a baby he never even held, right?

He’d known that Piper wouldn’t let him get away with that when it came to her child, and that knowledge had scared the hell out of him for months. What if he screwed up? What if he did it wrong and somehow hurt the baby?

But Piper was holding Em out towards him, an expression of utter trust on her face, and Leo couldn’t do anything but reach out to take his tiny niece from her arms, trying to mirror the way Piper had held her.

Emilia stared up at him with wide, curious eyes. Her weight felt awkward in his arms.

“Gods, I’m totally messing this up, aren’t I?”

“You’re really not,” Piper reassured him. “Just make sure you’re supporting her head. Here, I’ll-” She tried to lean forward, but stopped, wincing.

“Hermosa, you’re supposed to be resting,” Reyna told her, voice firm and concerned. 

She was smiling at Leo, but she was also wringing her hands, watching him closely like maybe she was expecting him to drop her daughter. 

That made two of them.

Leo could easily picture her vaulting over the bed to catch her child if that happened, though that weirdly didn’t make him feel a lot better about the possibility.

“Don’t mind my lovely wife. Rey’s just nervous,” Piper whispered, patting his arm. “You’re the first person aside from us and the hospital staff who gets to hold Em.”

“If you’re trying to make me less nervous, reminding me that I’m messing up one of Emilia’s first experiences with being held was not the way to go,” Leo joked, trying to shift the baby in his arms. This was not very effective, seeing as he had no idea what he was doing.

“I can help, if you want,” Jason volunteered immediately. He waited for Leo to nod, then put his hands over Leo’s and carefully adjusted his hold on Em a bit. “Here. Just support her head a little more. You’re doing great, mi vida.”

Emilia’s weight felt a little less awkward in his arms now. Leo relaxed a fraction, smiling down at her.

“Thanks for the assist.” 

“Always.” Jason nuzzled Leo’s cheek. “You were barely even messing up. You just have a tendency to overthink things when you’re nervous.”

“Says the guy who almost came here in a suit,” Leo commented, but he didn’t look up. His entire focus was on the newborn in his arms. He was mesmerized.

“Hi, sobrinita.” He was still sniffling, but he hadn't made his niece cry yet, so he was counting that as a win. “Gods, you’re a literal baby and somehow I’m the one wailing at you. So much for decent first impressions, hm?”

Emilia cooed at him. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” he agreed, nodding his head at his niece. Holding her grew easier with each passing moment. She was looking at him like he was the only person in the universe. 

Leo loved her immediately.

He couldn’t believe he’d been as anxious as he had about holding her. He couldn’t believe he’d almost made himself miss out on this.

 “Pipes, I hope you’re not expecting me to say no to her, ever, because I can tell you right now that it’s not gonna happen.”

Piper laughed. “Oh, please. Your job was never going to be responsible godfather. If that was what I was looking for, I’d have picked someone else.”

“We’re gonna get into so much trouble together,” he whispered to Em, grinning at her. 

This time, Emilia didn’t smile back at him. Instead she scrunched up her face and started crying.

Leo froze.

“Oh gods, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I did, I was just-”

“Babies cry. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Piper told him gently. “I can’t believe she’s been as quiet as she has since you two came in, honestly. This is the calmest she’s been since she was born.”

“Oh.” Leo had almost managed to stop crying, but that made him start up again. 

“She cried when I first held her, too,” Reyna told him. When he looked up at her, he could tell some of the tension had gone out of her shoulders, despite the fact that he’d just managed to upset her daughter. “I’m glad she’ll grow up knowing her emotions aren’t something to fear.”

Leo hadn’t even considered thinking about it like that, but it made sense that Reyna would. When he’d first met her, there would have been no way for him to tell if she’d cried—if she’d allowed herself to cry at all.

He looked at her red-rimmed eyes again, the expression on her face genuine and fond, and could immediately feel more tears running down his cheeks. He’d have walked over and hugged her this instant if it hadn’t been for the newborn in his arms.

“Yeah.” Leo sniffled. “Me too.”

He was pretty sure he hadn’t cried this many happy tears since Jason had started reciting his wedding vows in slightly awkward Spanish.

“Can I-” Jason asked, gesturing vaguely towards Emilia. When Leo and Piper both nodded, he took the baby into his own arms, rocking her gently. His expression immediately melted into the world’s softest smile.

Seeing them like this, Leo would have married him again in an instant.

“She’s probably overstimulated. This is the most people she’s ever met in her life,” Jason concluded once he’d managed to soothe her a little. 

“I get it. People are really overwhelming.” Leo wiped at his eyes. “I still can’t believe my stupid sewer rat face is, like, the fifth face this poor kid has ever seen. She did not need to be exposed to sewer rats this early in her life.”

“There’s nothing wrong with your face,” Jason protested immediately. “I like your face.”

“You’re married to me. You’re supposed to say that,” Leo teased, but he still found himself smiling. “We should probably leave you guys for the day, hm? You three all look like you could use a nap.”

“As long as you promise you’ll be back soon,” Piper insisted, smiling up at them as Jason—very reluctantly—handed Emilia back to her. “Hi, sweetie. You’re a little sleepy, hm?”

Emilia yawned in agreement.

“You’re not getting rid of us that easily.” Leo grinned at his best friend.

“Thanks for coming here as soon as you did. And, you know, for all the other sappy stuff I’m not going to say right now because I think we’ve all cried enough for one day.”

“Yeah. Gotta save some of that for tomorrow,” Leo agreed, wiping at his eyes with his sleeve. Then he reached out, gently pressing his finger into his niece’s palm. “Bye bye, Emilia. Be nice to your moms, okay?” 

Her hand closed into a fist, holding his finger tightly. 

Leo let out a startled laugh.

“She’s got excellent reflexes,” Reyna said proudly.

“Yeah, well, I guess that means we’re not leaving yet. I’m really not sure how I’ll ever get out of this finger trap without the ability to turn into an iguana.”

Both Piper and Jason immediately cracked up. Reyna just looked confused. Leo made a mental note to tell her that particular story some other time.

“Anything we should bring you tomorrow?” Jason asked. He looked Reyna over. “Do you want some clothes that aren’t, uh-”

“…pajamas?” Reyna laughed. “Yes. That would be great. I checked the hospital bag about fourteen times to make sure we’d packed everything we might need, but it somehow did not occur to me that we’d be leaving in the middle of the night, nor that I’d need to pack any clothes for myself.”

“I want a large coffee and the least healthy pastry you can find,” Piper said immediately. “Reyna has everything else covered.”

Leo laughed. He reluctantly removed his finger from Em’s grasp, linking his hand with his husband’s as they left.

And, well, if he spent the rest of the evening baking horrendously sugary pastries, that was nobody’s business but his own.

———

Fic Notes:

-Fun fact! I edited this at 3 am last night and then I didn’t even post it because I couldn’t think of a title. It is now, once again, 3 am. My sleep schedule is doing great, thanks for asking.

-The concept of “names have power” is so interesting to toy with specifically in a context like this. Because like, objectively, Leo has had a lot of bad stuff happen to him. He’d never even considered thinking of his name as a blessing before this. But few demigod or legacies lead easy lives, and in the end the thing that outweighs anything else is that he’s managed to find happiness, despite the odds being stacked against him.

-Also, considering Reyna has a prophecy hanging over her head that’s specifically linked to family legacy, it just makes sense for her and Piper to choose Leo’s name. What better way to protect your child from a prophecy than giving her the name of someone who defied his fate?

-Would really like to eventually go into Reyna’s feelings on all this more, but that deserves a whole fic of its own.

-For anyone who’d like context on the Emilio thing, the very basic idea of that being Leo’s full name and him never using it is that his mom always used his full name and he’s terrified he’ll forget what it sounded like if other people use it, because no one ever says it quite like she did.

-Here’s a little fic Juno wrote about Piper finding out Leo’s full name for anyone who wants a little extra context!

-“But canonically his name is Leonidas.” As far as I’m aware, Rick actually confirmed his name is just Leo. Also, this is a fanfic, I can therefore do whatever I want :)

Thank you so much for reading! Comments, as always, extremely appreciated.

[flowercrowngods]

oooohhh liminal spaces my beloved,,,,

I would LOVE to see you write number 3 (moving out and checking your now bare rooms if you left anything, either it be materials or memories) with Steddie!

klausi! 🥰🤍 thank you for indulging me, beloved! this got a little too introspective and too projecting but oh well

no. 3 — when you're moving out of a house and checking your room when it's almost or completely empty and sorted out

It takes him a while to realise what that feeling is that overcomes him; what to call that weight that’s been so firmly lodged inside his chest that he feels like his steps and movements have actually slowed down lately.

A lump in his throat and a heaviness in his bones is not necessarily new in this house, not a new sensation to feel within these walls, reinforced day by day, morning by morning, night by awful night.

But now, seeing it like this, there is a new emotion. A new heaviness. And Steve takes it all in as he lets his gaze roam over the empty floor, still dirty and dusty because he hasn’t the strength or the energy to clean it all again. He takes in the walls, splotched with light and shadow and the echo of pictures and posters that hung there for years, leaving behind only a trace of their shape on the wallpaper, untouched by sunlight for years.

They’re spectres of who Steve used to be. Spectres of versions of him — genuine and pretend alike.

He stares at the spot where a picture frame hung for as long as he can remember, just a tad off centre from the plaid wallpaper in a way that never ceased to make Robin complain.

He wonders, staring still, if he will hang up the picture frame again in his new place. If it will be off centre again, just for Robin. Just for a reason to smile. If he will keep that version of him, or if it will stay behind as a spectre within these walls, too.

One last victim for them. One last thing for them to take.

It’s a silly thought. Dramatic, really.

Just as dramatic as Robin, who refused to come upstairs with jim again for one last check, claiming If I go upstairs with you again and have to deal with your melancholy face, Steven, I will actually burn this place to the ground.

She’d flicked her Zippo at him in a way that was almost cool, and it almost made him tear up right then and there.

He will hang up that frame again. Maybe replace the picture, take one of Robin with her Zippo, put it right above the front door, just a little to the left.

Steve‘s eyes begin to sting as he tries to take a deep breath, tries not to give the awful wallpaper its old power back, tries not to feel so small. So big. So displaced.

His knees buckle at the same time as his resolve does, and he sits down on the floor, the plush carpet a familiar sensation against his palm.

He hates this room. He’s going to miss it so much. It was his prison. It was his sanctuary. It was never his, and yet he hates the idea of it becoming someone else’s. Nothing good happened between these walls. Every happy memory he has are linked to them. He is a stranger to this room. It knows his every secret.

He wants to burn this place to the ground and leave and never return. He wants to sit here forever and watch the discolouration deepen.

He wants this place to be his home. And yet he knows it never will be. He doesn’t know if he can make a home.

A tear runs down his face, and he doesn’t know why. Maybe it’s relief. Maybe it’s regret. Maybe it’s grief, or overwhelm; or maybe it’s all of them and more.

There is a knock, gentle and careful, sounding against the door frame. It has never been tapped like that. Will it know such gentleness again?

“There you are,” Eddie says, lingering behind Steve, his steps not approaching. Not encroaching upon Steve and his heavy little moment.

He wipes at his face and turns around, flashing what must be a pathetic rendition of a smile.

“Yeah, I’m here, just…” He clears his throat. “Just checking, y’know?”

Eddie smiles, kind and patient, like he sees right through him. “Checking and getting stuck, hm? Happens to me all the time.”

Steve shrugs.

“Can I come in?”

“Sure. I’m done anyway.”

Eddie hums, murmuring something that sounds a lot like No, you’re not. And Steve sags into Eddie as soon as he comes to a stop beside him, leaning against his leg and feeling the soft fabric of Eddie’s worn denim against his cheek. Like this, his head is at the perfect height for Eddie to run his fingers through his hair.

“You wanna talk about it? Or just sit in silence ‘til getting up is an option again?”

Steve doesn’t say anything, too focused on feeling all these things that the emptiness of his childhood bedroom makes him feel. All that fear, all that relief, all that anxiety and the nervousness and the excitement and the freedom and the yearning. For a home.

For picture frames off centre, for candles and fairy lights not just around Christmastime, for dinner with friends and finding that you don’t have enough dishes yet for everyone and then just eating stew out of a mug when all the bowls are gone already. Late night dancing and conversations and singing not just in the shower, arranging and rearranging a room until it’s just right and realising that a year or two has passed already and you’ve still not changed the makeshift lightbulbs in the hallway.

He wants a home. And he wants to make it, to create it, to build it from nothing but hope, love, and just enough craziness to not give up after the first failed attempt.

“Hey,” Eddie says at some point, and Steve didn’t realise there are more tears now until Eddie’s wiping them from his face, the warmth against Steve’s cheek gone now; replaced by the sleeves of Eddie’s hoodie. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

And he does. Steve falls forward now, into Eddie’s arms, and clings to him.

“I wanna make a home.”

“You’re gonna make a home, sweet thing.”

“But what if I can’t? What if it’s always gonna be like this?” Steve pulls back, wiping at his face, looking at Eddie now, whose hands are now in Steve’s lap, keeping him so, so warm. “So full of… nothingness and regret and just. Just empty.”

Eddie smiles and leans forward, his nose almost touching Steve’s. “You’re the least empty person I know, Stevie. You’re moving in with Robbie! That place is gonna be a home the moment you two set foot in it. And then we’re gonna paint your walls, we’re gonna go to the hardware store seven times a day because you two suck at decision making, but it’s okay, because it’s a process. And you’re gonna be so, so good at it. And you’re gonna have a home, okay? You’re gonna make it. Build it. Create it. And you get to start over and over and over until it’s right.”

Eddie’s hands have found their way into Steve’s hair again, lightly scratching at his scalp in soothing circles.

“And you know what’s best about homes?”

Steve shakes his head, hanging on Eddie’s lips and his words and all of his warmth.

“They’re a community effort. Meaning you have us to help you. You ain’t gotta do it alone. Robbie and I are gonna build your home just as much as you will, yeah? And we’re gonna be so annoying about it.” He ends his little speech with a manic little grin that never fails to get a laugh out of Steve, even if this one’s a little watery.

He breathes a little, and sighs at last, the tears finally stopping. “Do you really mean that?”

“What that I’m gonna be so annoying?”

“No, that one I know,” Steve grins, and Eddie cackles at that, leaning in to kiss him on the nose. “No, I mean… Do you really think I can do this?”

Eddie’s expression sobers into something more genuine. “I do. If there’s anyone who can make a home, it’s my boy Steve fucking Harrington. And do you wanna know why?”

He nods.

“Because you’re my home.”

The smile he gives Eddie before closing the gap between them for a proper kiss is one that these walls have never seen before.

The afternoon sun comes streaming in through the windows one last time just as Steve gets up, pulled into Eddie’s arms. It leaves the room tinged in gold for Steve one last time.

It’s goodbye. It’s farewell. It’s Steve, moving on.

🌷🤍 the prompt list

[sweetkpopmusings]

minho coworker headcanons <3

a/n: how could i ever even describe how fond i am of minho ?? he is so silly and weird and i'd protect him at all costs <333 as my job has been less than desirable for a long time, these coworkers hcs bring me soooo much comfort, and i hope they provide the same kind of serotonin for you !! pics not mine~

content: fluff, nonidol!au | wc: 0.9k | warnings: none! | pairing: coworker!minho x gn!reader | requests: open

almost everyone in the office is scared of him

you two never crossed paths because you work in different departments, so the only things you knew about him were what coworkers told you

the first time you saw him was when you went into a quiet place in the office to watch some videos and take a mental break from work

he was hiding in that very place because he had been reprimanded by his supervisor for a project (his partner on it was the one who dropped the ball but just so happened to be “sick” that day) and minho needed to collect himself before going back to his desk

that’s how you caught the scariest guy in the office looking at pictures of his beloved cats

when he noticed you, he tried to play it cool and act annoyed, but you saw the tips of his ears turn red as he realized you saw him being super soft for his precious cats

reading the room, you asked “rough day?” and the genuine concern in your voice completely melted minho’s scary facade away

he scoffed, rolled his eyes, and answered “yeah. gotta love being someone else’s fall guy”

that sparked a conversation that included him showing off his cats to you, and you showing him the silly little videos you were watching to boost your mood 

slowly but surely, minho would seek you out whenever he wanted a friendly conversation 

you were the only person in the office he didn’t try to intimidate, and everyone else was in complete awe of this

especially when they saw you two doing word/logic puzzles at work during your breaks

he even bought one of those massive puzzle books so you two could use it

whenever your lunches didn’t line up, you’d leave each other teasing and/or encouraging notes in the margins of the pages 

that book became a conversational record between you two

he’d never admit it, but, sometimes, when minho was feeling sentimental, he’d look through old pages and laugh at how your notes got more and more ridiculous as you two got more and more comfortable with each other :,-)

you become the minho translator because you just know him so well uwu

like if you two are sitting together during a coffee break and a coworker asks about weekend plans, minho would give a vague answer about interdimensional travel

before your coworker’s brain goes into overdrive trying to decode the statement, you’d explain, “he’s going to the animated film festival this weekend”

your coworker nods and silently leaves after getting their coffee, completely unaware of the snort minho let out at your translation

minho, despite befriending you, does not let go of his scary persona

in fact, because he’s so fond of you, he’ll use it to protect you

if someone bad mouths your quality of work or makes a snide remark about you in general, minho responds in a way that gives them nightmares for weeks

he never tells you that he does that, but you do catch him smirking whenever one of the perpetrators is nicer to you in the office >:-)

he’s super supportive of you at work too !! 

he’s your number one advocate when it comes to asking for a raise, applying for a promotion, etc.

minho thinks you deserve the best, and he’ll fight tooth and nail himself to get that for you, even though he knows you are more than capable of achieving greatness yourself

he thinks so highly of your skills and talent, and he wants to make sure you recognize your own potential <3

if he’s feeling insecure or down because of work or poor interactions with coworkers, he’ll turn to you for support, even if he doesn’t directly admit that something’s bothering him 

he could make a joke like “ah, how’re you going to solve this crossword if i get fired?”

obviously, you’d know exactly what he means by that and say “if you’re getting fired, i’m quitting because firing such a smart and competent employee is a major red flag”

he’d tease, “wow,  you’re really dedicated to crossword puzzles”

you’d nod, and he’d smile softly because he knew that you were always going to be his rock at work, and he’s eternally grateful for that

minho is so selective with the people he lets close to him, and, since you passed the test, he wants you two to be close outside of the office too

it takes him a while to work up the courage to invite you to hangout after work

but, when he’s throwing a casual dinner party with his friends, he knows it’s the perfect time to see each other without being bound by work schedules

you of course accept his invitation, but you also admit you’re a little nervous to meet all his friends

minho reassures you by telling you that he, a perfect and extremely cool person, has curated an impeccable group of people, so you have nothing to be worried about

and he’s totally right because all of his friends are not only super funny and kind, but they also love you !!!

and, more importantly, soonie, doongie, and dori love you <3333

every single one of his friends exposes minho for talking about you constantly lmao

minho gives them death glares but they refuse to miss out on the opportunity to tease him <3

especially chan because he thinks it’s so cute that minho is trying to act cool to impress you <3

by the end of the night, minho’s smiling ear to ear because you mesh so well with his friend group :,,,,-)

you two reference funny moments from the dinner party the next time you meet at work, and you’re both just bubbling with happiness because you can’t believe how lucky you are to have met each other by chance in a quiet corner of the office on a random afternoon <333

[karlachismylife]

UHMMM HIIIII this is @valscodblog but her main acc!!

AND IM IN DESPRATE NEED OF HEADCANNONS-LIKE FLUFFY ONES FOR SOAP AND KARLACH.

like-who cooks?? who cleans??? just homey fluffy headcannons <3

love, Val <3

HI PRECIOUS oh you just know how to make a fella happy, thank you for asking about them T_T honestly, i think while they're actively adventuring with the whole party and task force they don't do shit >< like, they're not that irresponsible, there's just always someone who does chores more efficiently, leaving these two ADHD sweethearts to forage, hunt, stay on watch and participate in wood chopping or some other shit requiring a lot of strength and not so much thoughts. but when they somewhat settle down in their own little home...

Two of us wearing raincoats

Domestic fluff with Karlach x Soap

CW: a bit suggestive in some parts, title from a Beatles song, some self-projecting headcanons.

UPD: corrected some wrong facts.

cooking is definitely in Soap's reign. while scottish cuisine can be extravagant sometimes (i swear, i love scotland for a lot of things, but what the fuck are they eating oh my god T_T), Karlach is definitely not a picky eater and will stuff herself full with whatever her love puts on her plate. the only requirements are for it to have meat and be in large quantities, and those are easily ticked off. however, she actually genuinely likes a lot of dishes Johnny whips out seemingly with random ingredients! always on duty since a very young age and ten years in hell, Karlach barely remembers what a home-cooked meal tastes like, so for her to just smell something cooking in the kitchen or just outside the porch if it's outdoor meal day makes it already the best she's ever had. add the sheer adoration and giddiness she feels whenever Soap takes care of her, and she's right there, a dreamy look in her eyes and tail coiling around Johnny's ankle when he allows Karlach to hug him from behind and steal a bite of the garnish. she can cook, meat especially, but she just never learnt any fun recipes, so she can only watch, learn or guess how to add a little more flavour to a simple steak. unless you want a fried imp on a stick, that's her specialty (tastes awful and it's not her fault).

also, Johnny definitely knows how much Karlach likes seeing him wear an apron and does it as often as he can. it's not as much a sexy thing (although there are plenty times when there's just the apron and he earns himself a hefty slap on that bare ass- okay, we'll discuss that another time, hehe), but that same domestic feeling that they both miss, each for their own reasons. he definitely has the "kiss the chef" one and gets all his tips for good service in kisses and grabby clawed hands squishing his sides while Karlach stays pressed to him from behind.

when Karlach does cook though, Soap is not allowed the same privileges of being handsy on the account of it always ending up in their food burnt. even if she was boiling some eggs for breakfast. Karlach is best girl at everything except self-control around her beloved soldier, doesn't matter if they've been married for thirty years already, she cannot resist his touch, so Johnny's banished to serving plates and salivating over the frying smells and a good view of Karlach's rear.

cleaning, on the other hand, is more of a Karlach's thing, even though they are both shit at it (ADHD go brrr, you know). they both can stay disciplined and ready for duty at all times, but what surrounds them is utter chaos most of the time, which, honestly, only makes their remarkable service all the more impressive. they're just used to it, mugs of tea strategically forgotten on random surfaces only to be conveniently found at the right time (hours later, yes, but Karlach can heat it back up rather quickly lol), clothers scattered around, hanging from chairs in piles so thick that it's uncomfortable to sit on said chairs, dishes stacking up into leaning towers... Karlach gets the dark urge almost always first. probably at some other important task's expence, but she will hyperfocus and scrub the whole house until it's squeaky clean and her back is a bit sore.

however, they both enjoy doing the dishes! for Soap it's an act of service, for Karlach just a prefect mindless task to get her hands busy and let her thoughts wander (and a source for Soap puns, yes), they don't fight for it of course, but sometimes Johnny does them despite having also prepared dinner. he honestly isn't that bothered about splitting every chore fifty/fifty, if Karlach ever raises concern, he just shrugs and tells her he wouldn't let her lift a finger around the house if it was up to him - or that she pulls more weight in other areas (like the gym, lol. does she bench press more than him? she very much might...)

favourite position - cuddled up wherever they find enough space for their two huge bodies to be squished together. pathological cuddlers. will absolutely spend some of their free time just lounging like two couch potatoes, arms locked around each other and - yes, you guessed it - fidgeting. cuddling before sleep, after sex, in the morning, after coming home, when having a bad day, a good day, a neutral day, no day... Soap gets to be little spoon so often and he loves it just as much as pressing up against one particular red tail and holding his palm over the calm engine. getting up in the morning can be tricky since they often get dragged back and cuddled to death by a protesting cuddle monster muttering about five more minutes.

they need, like, an alaska king size bed just so they don't push each other off. absolute menaces to sleep with: it starts so sweet, hands holding, legs tangled up and one thrown over the other's hips, Karlach's tail holding onto Johnny's waist securely... and then they switch sixty sleeping positions, have a three-part breaking dance-off, reenact wars they've been to in characters and exchange a meaningful sign language conversation. all while asleep and blissfully unaware. the amount of times Johnny nearly lost his eye to Karlach's horn or Karlach was almost smothered by Soap's heavy weight plopping right on top of her with every pillow and blanket hogged (they have two extra for each and it still doesn't help)... poor Clive doesn't get to sleep in bed with them smply because it's safer for him to stay on a beside table.

enthusiastic house remodelers! Soap is very crafty and likes to build and asemble furniture from scratch, and Karlach wants their shared home to be perfect for their tastes - she knows all too well what it's like to be homeless. changing interior design and moving furnitue almost every half a year is fun for them, they never run out of ideas how to make their home even more homey! they almost do not argue when renovating, which is a bit surprising given they're both hot-headed, but they definitely resolve any disagreements right there on the floor of an empty room or pressed to a soon-to-be-painted wall.

fixing shit is Soap's duty. Karlach gets frustrated easily when something broken isn't getting fixed easily, so even if she knows what to do well, she might worsen the situation by raging against a shaky table or something.

breakfast in bed for both of them. they can never predict who's getting up first, so whoever wakes up buzzing (or just falls off the bed first) and is lucky to escape the cuddle monster definitely takes their time to pamper the other, cut some butt heart-shaped sandwiches or make a loopy smiley face out of eggs and bacon/sausages. both avid tea drinkers even though Soap prefers coffee. he just is constantly thirsty (in all ways).

snack beasts. they are constantly chewing on something, partially because it's a fidgeting thing, partially because they need their sugar fill. the whole house is filled with snack stashes, sweet nuts in little bowls, paper bags with cookies, berries always in stock... absolutely steal each other's snacks and offer to share without even thinking, it's an automatic thing no matter how deep in thoughts/busy they are. Karlach is more of a sugary and sweets snacker, so she often has sugar crumbs in the corners of her mouth, cookies clutched in her big palm, a honey jar with a stick she dips for a taste freqiently; Soap on the other hand is mostly after everything chewy, not so important whether it's sweet or not. probably has some chewy sticks/toys in addition to constant snacking. like a wee puppy with growing teeth.

Soap prefers baths to showers and Karlach does have fun with a longer soak as well (especially if bubbles and/or her hot husband are involved, and yes, it's always steamy with her. literally, she can still boil the water if she stays long enough). absolutely wash together most of the time, or at least share the bathroom before going to bed, one of them showering and the other one pissing/brushing their teeth. will hold hands when Karlach's in the tub and Soap is on the toilet and vice versa.

despite their love for a good cuddle lie-in, they definitely prefer active recreation and hobbies: hikes, sports, dancing, rock climbing, exploring, town fairs browsing, woodworking... except for some very low-energy days (executive dysfunction is no joke) they will be out, getting up to some safer-than-war adventures. definitely go camping a lot, also try to invite their mates too even though not everyone is so enthusiastic. but they can have fun at home too, they will most definitely sunbathe and go for swims in the river/little lake not far from home (even though it might turn into shell hunting or cave exploring. or waterfall sex. mostly waterfall sex.) or have quiet dance nights just in the living room.

absolutely run out under the rain to jump in puddles, splash each other, roll in the mud and kiss while they're soaking and yelling at the thunder excitedly. just another benefit of hardly getting cold - the rain evaporates from Karlach's skin and creates their own cloud of mist to pretend like they're two thunderstorm ghosts stalking through the small village. they are the worst influence on the neighbourhood kids and are absolutely responsible for the little tieflings and other children coming home covered in mud and dripping on mam's carpet.

a little (not little) extra for modern!AU :)

Karlach hates vacuuming solely because of the sound, and yes, she can still hear it even if she blasts music in her headphones or on the stereo ungodly loudly. it just irritates her to the point of raging (misophonia said hi), she'd rather sweep the floors manually or just let Soap take over. she is a little self-conscious about it though, so he has to play up his knight in grey sweatpants with no underwear on shining armor act and play-fight for the bloody vacuum until she feels better and leaves him to do the chore.

training is a family activity! they obviously go to gym together as much as possible (oh Soap is there only to show off his buff girlfriend and watch her excersise to the point where they have to excuse themselves for a bathroom break), but they have a little makeshift gym at home, like, maybe just a treadmill and some small equipment for days when they don't feel like going out. actually, i think they have a little gym even in Faerûn, that one was definitely built mostly by Soap with help from Karlach. it's nothing fancy, but since it is somewhat a novelty (very different from the usual training grounds with dummies and everything) they probably have neighbours and local kids/teens come and use it in exchange for thoughtful and heart-warming gifts. Karlach talks everyone's ears off about how crafty her husband is, and said husband walks around with chest puffed out like a bloody turkeycock.

they actually fight over music despite having similar tastes! but they have different opinions on when is what soundtrack appropriate. you cannot tell me they do not enjoy oldschool rock (and not just rock) (yes this might be just a wee bit self-indulgent BUT YOU HEARD THAT THEME IN KARLACH'S AVERNUS ENDIND RIGHT???), like, two-thirds of their playlist are from the period of late 1950s to 1990s. Price definitely approves. they are definitely both metalheads, perhaps not the most "true" ones, but they would get a vinyl record player to listen to some Iron Maiden or Gojira (please metalheads don't kill me if this is a poser thing to write, i respect the genre just not my style-) BUT they will fight over what should be playing in the car/while on the bikes/in the gym. they both don't like to sit with headphones on when together, so "each listens to their own" isn't a solution. and yes, they are a bit obnoxious about blasting their shit with windows open, but they try to remember to be respectful...

definitely obligatory listening to scottish bands, Simple Minds and others close to top on their spotify. Karlach would probably be curious to look for obscure bands and discover indie artists and share found gems with Johnny. also - yes this is also very personal, but i sincerely think it suits them - they love Ren (yes, he's welsh, i know), Karlach a bit more probably since Soap's lifestyle and views contradict Ren's message at some points, but they both know all the lyrics and get emotional when listening to his music. also, like, boxing to his music is the best outlet for everything pent up.

they both are so bad at grocery shopping, oh my god T_T they are absolutely prime victims of flashy marketing, eye-hurting wrappers, misleading deals with yellow labels and supermarkets' floorplans. Soap is a lost cause, Karlach sends him to fetch some milk and he comes back with a full bag of sweets, steak "for the weekend" and gum with the transerring kids' tattoos inside. it's a miracle if he remembered about milk AND brought the right one (he's definitely the type to buy some yummy-looking bannana-soy-whatever-overpriced-bullshit when they needed simple cow milk for masala tea). Karlach is slightly better simply because she gets just so overwhelmed by the choice that it's easier for her to stick to a poorly scribbled list of things she's used to. actually gets upset when she feels like she wants just a little something extra, but can't figure out even what aisle to look at to satisfy her craving. even worse if she goes grocery shopping when hungry (quickly becomes hangry and might call Johnny for emotional support).

skincare is a joke to them. the only times they do that is when they see some stupid animal-print face masks or when Soap gets tricked by packaging and smells and buys some chocolate body scrub with red pepper thinking it's pudding (first he eats a spoonful, finally discovering that it's not pudding at all, then tries it on his whole body to see if he'll smell like chocolate after, and he SWEARS swallowing that shit wasn't as painful as feeling it burn his asscrack and- yes this might be from my experience too). they have a home spa date and clown around the whole time, wearing fluffy robes, eating cucumbers off each other's eyes, lounging around with fancy wine glasses filled with beer and gossiping about neighbours. take a hundred silly pictuers and decide that their favourite part of a spa day is when they wash everything off in the shower together and have sex. a lot of it. nothing more arousing than your man with sparkly pink eyepatches stuck to his freshly shaven mug.

haircare is a whole another story, though! they are both very proud of their hairstyles and want them to look good, so they do frequently shave off outgrown parts (often do that for each other without going to a hairdresser) and style it. Soap's hair tends to get flat so he will worry about volume, while Karlach (who i strongly believe to be blasian) needs oils and moisturisers for her hair. it's pretty short and only mildly wavy, so not the most troublesome to keep healthy, but she does look out for it. also for her horns too, it's canon that she uses oil to care for those babies!

while fixing stuff around the house is still mostly Soap's duty, fixing their bikes is Karlach's passion. she might actually have a whole garage in modern!AU, but even if she doesn't, she still spends hours elbows-deep in machine oil and grease, tinkering with the engines and polishing their shiny steel steeds. Soap often has to come get her out of her hyperfocus to have a bite and a cuddle-smooch (or more) session on the garage petrol smelling old couch.

watching football with beer and smoking (and possbly all the mates interested) is a must. they are so very yelling at the TV and slapping each other's thighs when there's a dangerous moment - and kissing when their team scores. probably the only thing on TV they will never interrupt with getting handsy, they're both too invested lol. god forbid someone in the room roots for another team than them, this will be such a heated arguement that outsiders might think there's a murder about to happen (it never strains their friendship with anyone).

luckily for Soap, modern!Karlach will not melt snow around herself, so they can and will go snowboarding at least once a year. he absolutely gets a kick out of teaching her, and their high body temperature is a welcome feature on such vacations. however, they still wear those stupid lovers-cojoined mittens on walks even though their hands never get cold.

whew, that was a ton of word vomit, haha, thank you for your ask! they are SO appreciated as well as likes, reblogs and just the love i see here for my precious explosive adhd meow meows T_T feel free to request more! also not just about them, i will gladly write for other COD or BG3 characters. any pairing, also x reader or x OC, why not. i need to get my english writing skill up, feels so weird to see it compared to my first language texts...

[foundry-fabrications]

Happy Halloween everyone! It is with immense pleasure and excitement that I present to you a labor of love, the long awaited rework of Flesh & Bone! Originally, I had intended to release this shortly after the absolutely stellar remake of Dead Space, but that obviously wasn't going to happen. So as to not repeat my last mistake with big projects and arbitrary deadlines, I took things nice and slow, took my time to give this work the true love and attention it deserved. Anything for my beloved Dead Space.

And I couldn't be more pleased with the result! Well, I can always be happier. There's always something I wish I could have added or done differently, but I won't dwell on that. "Don't let perfect be the enemy of done".  But it makes me so happy to see it in its full gorey glory after all this time. But that enough preamble, let's get into the changes from the original!

Being the result of a 3-week mad rush to release on time for Halloween, the original brew has a LOT of problems. I forgot a lot of details and made a lot of mistakes just by the nature of not having enough time to do it justice. Having had, what, 2 years, between now and then has given me a lot of time to hone my skills as a creator and figure out exactly what I wanted to do for the eventual rework.

The first and most obvious thing is the aesthetics. Flesh and Bone was the first time I ever tried to make a Homebrewery theme from scratch, so I had a LOT to learn in a very short timeframe. I got it most of the way there for what I wanted to do, but it still had a lot of issues, namely a lack of integrated stat blocks. Formatting was also just awful. I just couldn't get them to work quite right, and they always looked super off, so I elected for images instead. Since then, I've made my Xenomorph supplement which used that initial test as a starting point, and I was able to fix a lot of the issues I ran into. I also want to change the overall look of the theme itself. When I designed it, I was going for a design mix based on the Dead Space wiki and the holographic UI from the games themselves. The result was...not the most legible. I've taken a new approach with the rework, made everything MUCH more readable, and borrowed heavily from the aesthetics of the 2023 remake.

As for the contents themselves, turns out there were a bunch of really cool necromorph variants that I just completely forgot about like the Twitchers, those reanimator swarms from DS3, and the Ubermorph. With that last one in particular, I reworked the old Hunter into the Regenerator with Hunter and Ubermorph variants, like I have with the Slasher, Spitter, and now Twitcher. In general, most of the necromorph forms were in dire need of reworks up in one way or another, especially their descriptions. I pulled almost all of that text directly from the Dead Space wiki, and it showed real bad. Again, 3 weeks, all panic. All the descriptions have been rewritten to be more in line with my other writing.

I also removed that section at the beginning about the Markers. I originally included it to give context for the rest of the brew, and I just really wanted to talk about the Markers, but the more I looked at it that section honestly added very little to the rest of the brew that couldn't be done in other areas. And let's be real, the Markers are SO IMPORTANT to the Dead Space universe that they really need their own dedicated brew. So, I pulled that section out, and it will go in said dedicated brew another time.

And the final change is I actually included some form of boss necromorph this time! I hadn't planned to, but I started thinking more and more about it, and I was also asked by one of my lovely patrons about it, so I gave in and made stats for really the only Dead Space boss worth talking about: The Hive Mind. I actually had fun writing it, working out its abilities from both the original and the remake, as well as taking some creative liberties and giving it some fun new abilities as a result of it being a Nexus necromorph.

So that's everything! I hope this gruesome creation of mine brings you as much joy and terror as it has to me. Stay safe, stay spooky, don't forget to love each other, and m̵̧̈́ͅa̴̜͑̍ḳ̵̍ë̷͍͇́ ̶̖̾̏u̸̪̅͜s̷͙̟̓ ̷̬̩̒w̸͇͘h̶̠̳͆̽o̶̻̺͂̀l̴̛͍̦e̸̡̡͗. See you next time.

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[crowleysgirl56]

Concerning the reactions to the comment David made to a young woman about the ending of Good Omens season 3 (including mine).

Firstly let me start by saying that most of my posts are to be taken a jokes. They are written to be mostly tongue in cheek, sarcastic and (what I think) are hilarious. So even though my previous post about freaking out about what David said might seem like I was legitimately panicking I just want to say that it was a joke and please don’t take it too seriously. Honestly I hope it just made you laugh, and you continued scrolling. If my post caused anyone to further their own anxiety or freak out, I apologise. If my post contributed to the fandom as a whole slightly losing their minds, I also apologise.

For those of you who took your reactions to David’s comment a step further and threatened that poor girl, insulted her, or were just generally mean to her, stop it! Don’t do that! Don’t be awful. Please be kind. Go and apologise!

With that out of the way, I did want to do a quick* analysis of the comment and perhaps address why people (and to a little extend myself) are feeling nervous.

To begin with, Neil has previously said (and this is a really good point), David was speaking directly to a fan, and was unaware he was being filmed. So when he says “maybe it’s not the ending you want”, he’s speaking directly to the person who asked him. We don’t know the context of their interaction beforehand and maybe she (or anyone else) had already expressed what their desire for the ending is, so this was his response. However taken out of context, the fandom has put themselves in the shoes of the person asking the question and therefore inserted themselves into the you part. The ending might not be want we want or expect. And considering the number of discussions the fandom participates in, the number of headcanons the fandom throw around, and the number of fanfics being written and read, whatever ending Neil has written is not going to satisfy everyone. It’s impossible to. But that is the same of any fandom really.

Speaking of fandoms, yes we are collectively nervous for a few reasons. One, for a good month there, we were convinced that the ending of season 2 was what the end of that story was going to be. Then when it was announced there’s still one more story to tell, there was another four months before it was finally confirmed that we were going to get that story. Two, case in point Game of Thrones. I don’t think I need to explain anymore than that. We have been burned before and now we’re worried it could happen again (though I will point out here, Neil has a better handle of storytelling and the love, devotion, and desire to finish a story that is beloved to him and is effectively a love letter to his best friend, compared to two TV producers who got bored and wanted to move onto other projects…). Three, filming is still 6 months away, and the premiere likely another year after that. A lot can happen in that time. So after these experiences, I can appreciate why people get nervous and a little in their heads about things.

In terms of the immediate reaction to what this could mean for the ending itself, I honestly cannot fathom how some people have managed to draw a straight line from “It might not be the ending you want” to “Terry would absolutely hate it”. Like, that just boggles my mind. HOW do you extrapolate that? David then immediately said “It’s a good ending”. So I think it’s safe to say that it will be good.

So let’s talk about endings and what people are mostly worried about.

1) Crowley and Aziraphale become human. This isn’t going to happen. Mainly because Neil has joked multiple times that this is the ending. Therefore if he says “this is what will happen” I’m pretty confident that this is what definitely won’t happen. You know after season 2, I ended up writing my own little fan fiction about them becoming human. I thought it was sweet and cute. Then I saw a lot of people absolutely hate that idea, so I never published it anywhere. Oh well.

2) Either one or both of them will die. Also not going to happen. Something tells me that Neil would not participate in the “bury your gays” trope. I do think that maybe there might be a non-permanent death or near death in the climax. But both will live, I’m positive of this.

3) Sex. I’ve spoken about this before. We’re not getting hardcore sexual activity. This is not the show for that. Neil has said before he’s not into writing that kind of thing. Do I think we’ll get more kissing? Yes. Do I think there will be implied sex? Maybe, hopefully, I’m wishing for it. But there is not going to be actual sex folks. Please make your way to AO3 for your reading pleasure.

4) The South Downs. And now we get to what I’m most worried about. That we won’t get what everyone assumes the ending will actually be. Crowley and Aziraphale retired and living in the South Downs. Will I be disappointed if this doesn’t happen? Absolutely. Will I lament here about it? Sure, probably. Will I send Neil abusive messages about how he destroyed and ruined the ending? NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! AND DON’T ANYONE ELSE DO THAT EITHER!

So, will the ending be what we want? There is every chance that it will be, but always a possibility that it won’t be. This is the nature of storytelling. You will never satisfy everyone. Will the ending be good? I have no doubt in my mind that it will be. David says it’s a good. I trust him. Neil says it will be good. I very much trust him.

This is a comedy, first and foremost. Comedies have happy endings. Let’s just take a collective breath and believe it to be so.

*by “quick” I actually meant “really long”. Sorry about that.

[mecachrome]

wahh thank u @scrappyracers for the tag i enjoyed ur answers a lot :') f1 tag game...

Who is your favorite driver?: i am an oscarybro first & foremost <3 he's the only driver i truly rep because honestly i don't think i have the bandwidth for more even if i wanted to/tried!!

Do you have other favorite drivers?: i would basically put alex below oscar in his own little tier and then it's just like [WALL]... but i'm also fond of yuki + lando + lewis and respekt maxv :') the rest of the grid i honestly don't think about 99% of the time LOL not in a bad way but because i barely have enough energy for My Guys as is u know

Who is your least favorite driver?: 😔 i feel bad sharing hateurisms on my family friendly blog. 

Do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well?: def drivers first but i genuinely like mclaren as a racing outfit so that helps!!! when oscar was still in alp i suffered so much because of it being a deeply unserious team and even back then when the cracks were still forming this was fairly evident because i had a rossi agenda, so i was like wegghhhh i guess i can enjoy a williams stint/swallow down alpine content for him. 😔 and then he replaced [answer to question above which at the time hindered my mcl support significantly] and i got the ultimate driver pairing at a team i'm actually quite fond of ❤️🤍🖤

If you like teams, what team do you pull for?: any1 else papayapilled??? 🧡

How long have you been into F1?: a little over 2 years!!! how i managed to get into this sport via an inactive reserve driver i don't know.....

What got you into F1?: several friends were getting into it & were reading mxl fic & things of that nature and even though i wasn't really invested in any of the ships presented i ended up biting as well... but fsr i was not compelled by most f1 content / barely watched dts and instead got reeaaally into feeder series, i think perhaps because at the time i was fascinated by prospect projections + mapping / modeling career trajectories + the idea of "ceilings" in hockey and was watching a ton of jr hockey so it kind of translated over and i got to enjoy masterclasses like litr the most broken broadcast streams ever of kimi driving off into the distance in adac f4. But anyway... i also watched chasing the dream and became obsessed with oscar from that and the rest was history 😌🐨🧡

Do you enjoy Fanfic/RPF?: i definitely read it!!! RPF Is Fine etc. i've written 2 effwon fics very poorly and that's it but i peruse the 814 archives regularly..... i forever need to be better at commenting and feel very bad about my own shyness but i think this fandom has such a wealth of incred authors whom i am always in awe of x__x 🧡 tho i will say i'm also a stickler for the 4th wall and it mildly horrifies me that 814 are 75% public..... also fun fact 814 is my favorite oscar ship but it's only my #3 lando ship LOL. j(e|o)ndo you are so special 2 meee

How do you view new fans?: well i'm a relatively new fan so 💗 honestly i barely witness or process most fandom discourse wrt: gatekeeping the sport or dts fans or what have you since i do not frequent those circles of the internet (no public twitter / have never downloaded tiktok in my life) so i don't even know the primary arguments!!

If you could take over as team principal for any team, who would it be and why?: i should never be put in charge of anything. now i'm just trying to think strategically like okay where would i want to live but even then i have no idea... 

Are your friends and family into F1 as well?: my family could not care less but def the former !!! 💗 going to my 2nd gp soon with my beloved chirlie friend who has been with me thru k-pop fandom for like 8 years now hehe

Are you open to talking to other fans/making friends?: yes i'm just very shy & have multiple anxiety disorders Amongst other things so pls forgive my neuroticism 😭😭😭 but i love 2 have discussions.... oscar piastri lore is my passion in fact <3

0 pressure tagging @bright-and-burning @piastrisms @miamimaiden @goingxmissing If u would like !!! these r fun qs i like hearing about people's fandom journeys/experiences hehe :')

[frasermints]

tagged by my beloved @seedlessmuffins thank you k <3

tagging @iamidentical @anaphylactic-dread @lukevangelista @onmytape and anyone else that feels like it <3

if you had a spotify wrapped but for which hockey players you talked about the most, who would be your top five?

as the hockey panels say, i think i have to go off-board with this and break it down by pwhl - nhl - juniors because... i actually couldn't narrow it down to just five if i tried

juniors:

5: Landon DuPont, Everett Silvertips (WHL)

this kid was granted exceptional status to enter the whl a season early, and iirc at one point was tied for second most points in the league. he's "dropped down" a tad (tied for sixth of all defensemen in goals, tied for ninth in points) but like i need y'all to understand the only other whl player to be granted exceptional status is connor bedard i will never shut up about him okokok

4: Quinn Beauchesne, Guelph Storm (OHL)

drinks moon water before every game now at the suggestion of his crystal girlie billet mom who replies to everyone in the instagram comments of every video about him posted by the guelph/ohl/chl accounts. i think that speaks for itself.

3: Carter Savage, Tri City Americans (WHL)

wears number 21. i think that also speaks for itself.

2: Morgan Stickney, Shattuck St-Mary's (USHS)

she's the first female american player to be drafted into the whl, & the second female ever. she's a goalie and she's fucking insane, 23-4-3 with a .928 and 1.52 GAA. tri city had a female goalie in net in september 2002 (shannon szabados) and vancouver drafted a defenseman 286th overall in the 2022 draft (chloe primerano) so like. if she leaves shattuck it'd be historic for her to do both. i talk about this a LOT irl when discussing the pwhl and the future of juniors drafting, and the potential for women to not have to take the ncaa route and enter the pwhl before their early 20s.

1: Lukas Matecha, Tri CIty Americans (WHL)

second ever goalie i imprinted on. we traded his #2 after the very first whl game i watched in person and it was awful for me personally so he was the obvious next choice. got his first shutout last year, he and his new tandem went on a twelve game win streak and after losing in prince albert have continued it. i watched the entire 2024 nhl draft just to see where he'd go (he was projected as the third best goalie in all of north america, i expected him to go SOMEWHERE) and he WASN'T DRAFTED... biggest betrayal i've ever experienced tbh. he went to the cats development camp though and he took lots of photos with luongo so that eased some of my outrage.

pwhl:

5: Lexie Adzija, Boston Fleet

at the start of the season last year, this girl's mom surprised her by asking lexie adzija to show up at her birthday party and she fucking did. she showed up with like a signed stick i think?? if i remember correctly?? literally walked into this eleven year old girl's house and said happy birthday and brought her a fucking birthday present and ate cake with her and her friends. if that isn't the best way to grow the game i don't know what is and i'll never shut the fuck up about how important that is To Me

4: Emerance Maschmeyer, Ottawa Charge

my introduction to emerance maschmeyer was her replying to a comment on this video of a little girl the nhl (?) instagram account reposted of her making quite possibly the most insane save a seven year old is capable of, someone was like "can't wait for her to replace maschmeyer in ottawa in a few years" and she liked it and said "me either" and when i tell you that got me this 🤏🏽 close to switching sides and becoming an ottawa fan

3: Marie-Philip Poulin, Montreal Victoire

completely disregarding her talent as a hockey player because that alone is something i could talk about for a very long time (i still stand by my statement that if the nhl went coed she'd fucking smoke the men and i'm not sorry about it there's nothing you can tell me or show me that'll get me to change my mind) montreal is my pwhl team and the narratives of mpp and laura stacey being linemates got me GOOD. i take every opportunity to talk about this when i try to get people into hockey bc most people's frame of reference for women's sports is either tennis or the wnba and there was that meme going around of "oh all wnba players are lesbians, oh this wnba player had to play her ex and defended her against her own team" a while ago and it's like... if you're into women's sports just for the narratives there's so much better than that i PROMISE bro.

tied for first: Natalie Spooner and Blayre Turnbull, Toronto Sceptres

k knows why. that is all.

nhl:

workplace honorable mentions: Jeremy Swayman, Boston Bruins. Connor McDavid, Edmonton Oilers. Connor Bedard, Chicago Blackhawks. Macklin Celebrini, San Jose Sharks.

coworker kyle asks me about these guys all the time. i don't know why. i think he thinks that i'm a fan of them. he only knows the connors by name and even then he thinks they + mack are all the same person.

5: Joseph Woll, Toronto Maple Leafs

he's just a funky little guy i enjoy projecting onto

4: Seth Jarvis, Carolina Hurricanes

i need to bite him. i also believe wholeheartedly with my entire chest that we WOULD get along in real life.

3: Jake McCabe, Toronto Maple Leafs

i have his card in the back of my phone case and experience extreme cute aggression when i see his face i can't explain it

2: Fraser Minten, Toronto Maple Leafs

the only one i actually have any legitimate reasons for. watched him play up close and in person once when he was with kamloops and it was life changing i'm so serious. there's something insane about watching Your Rookie play hockey five feet from your face, close enough that you can reach out and touch them through a hole in the glass and knowing that one day they'll be Doing The Damn Thing. also knowing that he's the reason connor bedard pushed himself so hard he became what he is, and that mints took the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ approach and is still That good... i will literally throw up and die if i think too hard about this kid

1: Matthew Knies, Toronto Maple Leafs

my best friend that i took to the kraken/canucks game last szn and i call him "boyfriend" because she can never remember his name

[the-sand-guardian]

Whumptober Day 8: Isolation Chamber

A continuation of Day 2

<><><><><><><><><><>

Cell was still stuck in solitary after his “friends” had escaped. He was on day 5 of his second week, and it was just as miserable as he’d remembered. He was used to it though, it had begun to feel like home in all honesty. Those four walls and big, heavy door had been there with him for so long now he began to take comfort in them. The rickety bed wouldn’t tell his secrets to anybody, and the solid concrete walls kept out unwanted intruders. The door would tell his secrets, he knew that. There was a little flap that sometimes opened to give him food or talk to the guards. It told them too much. He thought he honestly might prefer it if the door was just gone entirely. At least his beloved queridinho was back and safe. 

Pac and the others had been recaptured a few days after their initial escape. The door wasn’t very good at keeping the guards’ secrets, either. What a gossip! 

At least knowing Pac was safe brought him some comfort in that small room. Mike was alive too, which Cell could live with for now, same with Guanxinim. Apparently his queridinho had even stabbed a guard on his way out! It was heartwarming, really, it seemed like even the door was proud of Pac. The more Cellbit thought about it, the more he figured that light conversation with it might not hurt too badly. While the door may have been a snitch and a bastard, it was definitely a good listener. 

And so Cell began to talk to it. 

You don’t talk to the door while it’s speaking- That gets you told off from whatever’s on the other side of it. Cell had already figured that out. Sometimes, it gave him food, other times it didn’t. He didn’t care either way, he’d find a way to make do. When the door’s mouth was closed, though, it gave Cellbit free reign to talk. He talked to it about lots of things, but his favourite thing to tell it about was his queridinho. It didn’t seem to care much, but it was nice to get it out of his system. 

He’d tried to tell it about freedom before, too. A voice on the other side had laughed- actually laughed. Didn’t he know Cell had a lover outside of these walls to get to? Granted, he was only out in the general population of the prison, but that’s all the further Cell could handle him being. He was going to get back out of here, goddamn it, and he was going to kill Mike and Guanxinim for trying to steal his boyfriend! The door just laughed again. What a bitch. 

Just as Cell was gearing up to take a swing at the door for its awful attitude, a familiar voice came in close to the door’s mouth and opened it just slightly to speak through it. 

“Remember this, for me, will you?” 

Felps. 

There were several clicking sounds before Cell was met with a blinding light- Or maybe it was just regular light that felt blinding due to the weeks in darkness. The door had opened, and he wasn’t going to fumble this escape. 

“I’ll give you ten minutes to run, then I’m calling the other guards. Your time starts…now” 

And so Cell ran.

<><><><><><><><><><>

Thank you for reading! I've also posted this to Ao3, where I'll be cataloguing all of my works for this month! I also have 3 other WIP fics, so if you enjoy my works please go show some love over there or feel free to shoot me an ask!

[straycalamities]

hello, you are cool, and I like your work! :) <3 I was just thinking 2012 tumblr didn't seem like it had many girl characters, due to everyone making spin-offs of the same ones like Once-ler. I was wondering if you have any girl OCs you'd use if you wrote a new zombie story in the future. =)

(btw keep up the good work and have a nice day!)

thank you very much!

and yes that is true, but also, well, by the time of thneedville/thornville high there were more people trying to make girl ocs but unfortunately the fandom was very overcritical and harsh on them

so it’s not only was it not the first thing people thought to do because of the nature of the fandom, but it became something that if you did do it, there was a lot of stress on you

you had to be better than most of the male askblog charas, you were judged harsher for your mistakes, you were just overall held to a higher expectation than any of the male blogs

my qpp knows this firsthand as they tried to run a girl askblog in that environment: nyx. and they were subject to a lot of bullying, unfair judgement, and other awful stuff while doing so. creating a female chara blog was signing yourself up to a subscription of anon hate

not only nyx but all the others as well at the time especially if you were to befriend or, heaven forbid, have romantic intentions with a male oc or one already involved in a favored mlm ship

like yes i also had mean-spirited people in my anon boxes time to time but it was nothing compared

sheep/quinn, a beloved from that time, anytime she’d ever interact with spook, would be subject to the nastiest messages guaranteed. i’m surprised her mod still wanted to have them interact. though it is worth noting they deactivated and remade that blog multiple times because of this

so yeah…while what you said is also true, this part is also a big factor and definitely needs to be brought up and recognized. it wasn’t so much that it was ALL people more interested in making and writing guys it was also the extra, important question of: Could you endure the constant hate if you made a girl blog?

there’s still an issue, to this day, of female blogs being pretty ignored and under-created, but id say the vicious environment that turned away a lot of people from doing so has calmed way down thankfully

but yes! uh when i was originally planning to make an original comic based off the camp entre run, i did, with my collaborators at the time, make some female ocs to add in as well as adjusted the gender of existing charas. though, that project is pretty much dead right now and needs an entire redo. but i still plan on …something one day. and yes there will be a way more accurate percentage in the genders present lmao 😭

i also have a plan for a new truffula flu story i’d like to tell that i was gonna use for…a thing, i mean i might still but branch it out more. but anyways it does focus around a young woman, my audrey oc Aoife :) i mean she’s become a lot more oc than audrey at this point but that’s how she started lmao

when i get the time to start that? uh. but it is something i wanna do at least maybe before the new year

i also thought about throwing Eren in because both of her main inspos are characters from apocalypses/dystopias so she’d fit right in

[gyllenhaalstories]

some presumed innocent word vomit <3

EPISODE 1 & 2. i wouldn't have survived these episodes without daphne @sizzlingcloudmentality 💖thank you for watching it with me, i had the absolute best time. i love you so much. this was absolutely insane, this was incredible. how are we supposed to wait for a whole week? i need rusty now!

Full Commentary

Episode 1 & 2

Episode 3

Episode 4

Episode 5

Episode 6

Episode 7

Episode 8

THE FUCKING SEX SCENES? this is literal porn THE V LINE THE ASS THE GRUNTS THE THIGHS THE HANDS THE ASS THE EVERYTHING OH MY GOD THIS IS STRAIGHT UP PORN

dad!jake my beloved dad!jake i love you

omg rusty 🥺🥺🥺

RUSTY BEING THE FATHER???????????? BYE OH MY GOD i did not see this coming and he is such an IDIOT oh my fucking god

rusty is so pathetic he is so awful what a fucking loser who didn't have the balls to ask his wife to choke him a little and put a finger up his ass. BARBARA WOULD HAVE DONE IT

barbara is mommy rusty has mommy kink and i have mommy issues. dangerous.

SCREAMING WITH AND WITHOUT THE S

raymond. i love you raymond please don't die you're so old this is too much your heart is fragile pls check your blood pressure.

THE GLASSES THE GLASSES SO MUCH GLASSES OH MY GOD GLASSES

the bracelet the jewellery they're making that man sparkle sparkle I AM ENJOYING EVERY SECOND OF IT

i hate nico with a burning passion just shut the fuck up

i thought i liked tommy but he's just hot i hate him too

i hate carolyn she's shady as fuck i don't like her

can he fuck ME on the floor of his office instead??? ANYWHERE ANYTIME

oh my god the grunts

rusty 🥺

the angry outbursts!!! the crying!!! he is absolutely unhinged!!!

the vein acting. OOF.

the glasses in his collar in his shirt the glasses hanging by a button the glasses

rusty thinks he can 🥺 i'm sorry 🥺 his way through everything. he could with me. CHOOSE ME PICK ME LOVE ME STALK ME FUCK ME.

jake did this serious project so he could have fun in movies like road house so everyone who complained he should only and strictly do serious stuff better let him have all the silly little fun he wants after this. HE IS DELIVERING.

the andy barber & rusty sabich parallels write themselves these man are just two peas in a pod of lawless lawyers defending jacob i love you presumed innocent i love you

[plsdonttakemyname]

— — — — — — — — —

Characters; Nikolai Gogol

Genre; angst, hurt/comfort, scenario

Warnings; reader has family and friends problems, mental breakdowns, Bad writing. So please don't read it if you're uncomfortable with these. This might not make sense since this is my second time writing an angst , hurt comf and scenarios but I hope you enjoy it <3..

— — — — — — — — —

Knocking at the door of Nikolai's office with a tired look on your face as you walked in. You were greeted by Nikolai, your beloved boyfriend.

"Oh, hello dove. I was expecting to see you there. Would you mind to share a conversation?"

"I just wanna cry." Nikolai's eyes widened abit before speaking again. "Cry away Dove.. It's okay. Let go of your tears and let me hold you close. You know how much I care for you. I'll never leave you alone again." He said and kissed your forehead " Now come here, sit on my lap. I want to kiss you right now" he said with a smile on his face. "I love you so much Kolya, it's just things are getting more and more harder for me y'know.." You were really tired after studying for hours straight without any rest at all. "I know, baby. But don't worry. Everything will be alright. Just stay strong for me alright ?. We have each other, we can make it through anything together.I promise everything will work out just fine". He said as he holds your hand gently "I just I feel like I'm always not good enough, my friends and family doesn't even understand that I'm trying my best to make them happy.." you said as tears started to build up in your eyes.

"I'm trying my best Kolya. I really am. but none of them believed me. I got called a whore, spoiled and ungrateful. I don't know what to do anymore. I just feel like I wanna cry my heart out." You choked out a sob as soon as you finished the sentence "Oh, Dove... That sounds horrible. What happened?.. Tell me everything, please. Don't keep any secrets from me. I'm here for you. Always. And if anyone tries to hurt you or insult you, they won't get away with it. Not ever. Okay? Do you trust me Love?" He says as worries started to build up in his eyes and pulled you into a hug "yes I do trust you.. I'm studying really hard for college. my parents always told me to get off my phone and yelled at me when I'm clearly texting my project teacher about my work.This morning I got into an argument with my parents. They just slapped me because I talked back and I was trying to defend myself." You started crying while Nikolai is hugging you tightly on his lap.

"Oh Dear... You poor thing..That must've been awful. I wish I could protect you from these people who would do such terrible things to you. My love, you deserve better than this. If only..." He looks at the floor with sadness in his eyes "...if only I had done something sooner.." "All of my friends are just using me and talking behind my back I really don't know what to do anymore Kolya.I really don't. It just hurts." Your voice started to crack "I'm sorry Dove.. I should've known better than to think that those thing were worth trusting. They're nothing but troublemakers. They'd use you until you broke down completely. Then they'd laugh at you when you cried. They're disgusting creatures." He said while rubbing circles behind your back trying to calm you down "I wanna cry my feelings out but I'm really scared.." He hugged you tightly "It's okay, my love. Let it all out. Cry as loud as you need to. I'll hold onto you forever. No one else matters but us. Only us." He strokes your hair and gently tucking your hair behind your ear that was covering your face as he continued.

"You're safe with me.Never forget that. M'kay?" Your nodded and your sob slowly turning into small sniffles "Kolya?" You said his name after calming down abit. "Yes? What is it, my love?" He smiled warmly at you "Is there anything else bothering you besides your bullies,being treated badly by others or feeling worthless?" He takes his hands in yours and looks into your eyes lovingly "Tell me everything Dove."

"Am I annoying to you?.." You asked him as he laughs softly "Of course not, my love. Why would you ask such an absurd question? Of course not. You are absolutely adorable. The most beautiful person I have ever met. There isn't another person alive who compares to you. In fact, no other person even comes close besides you , Dos-kun and Sigma. You smiled at his response "I'm sorry for breaking down like this when you're busy... I just can't do this anymore I've been too stressed out lately." He kissed your forehead gently "Don't be sorry, my love. Just remember how much happier we are together. Remember how happy we make each other. And never doubt yourself again. You are perfect." He says and holds you close against him "I promise you will find someone special soon enough." "But...You're special to me and I love you Kolya." You whispered In his ears with a smile on your face now as he blushed at your words "I love you too my Dove. Now come here and give me a hug. Hugging helps calm you down after stressful situations. It makes you feel loved and protected too.. So... He said as he pulls you closer to him "C'mere! Give me a big hug I've missed you so much my love "

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A/n; Hii ! I hope you like this fic :) I'm so sorry if anyone is going through this too. I hope you're all doing okay now <33 Make sure to stay Hydrated and Eat in time, Just a reminder you're all perfect no matter who you are, You're all good enough. Some words can be extremely hurtful sometimes but it's the best to try and ignore them :D I'm always open to talk about it if you're going through a rough time/day :) I love you all mwah <3

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[cto10121]

Twilight Clown Takes Special Edition—Bella and Edward Would Be Divorced By Now & Other Projections

In which the Twilight anti fandom cheerfully throws canon and even their beloved lore out the window for this increasingly deranged fanon, in part born from the dumbass movie canon. Here we go, om nom nom

Edward only “killed the vibe” when he thought he hurt Bella. He was literally upset that he gave her bruises and thought that Bella was putting up a brave face. 😭 If anything, it’s such a green flag it hurts.

Also, while Edward is dramatic, so is Bella. They both are! Bella is just more chill as a default.

Tell me you’ve only read the first 50 pages of Midnight Sun without telling me you only read the first 50 pages of Midnight Sun.

Edward being unable to read Bella’s mind is just like his reaction to Bella’s scent—it is a hook, a fictional contrivance to make him want to spend more time with her.

Once he does, though, he sticks around. Why? Because he likes Bella personally. She is quirky, self-possessed, quick-witted, winsome, and pretty tough and brave—the exact qualities you need to be able to handle vampires. She is also self-negating with self-esteem issues, which Edward admires and relates to, since he is self-negating with self-esteem issues too. Birds of a feather, etc.

Edward doesn’t know that Bella is like all the other girls even though he 1) asks a million questions about her likes and interests, 2) she tells him to his face that she is “absolutely ordinary,” and 3) er, stalks her.

You would think homeboy would get a clue about what kind of girl Bella is by now, especially from 3).

Visits her mom, oh God, these clowns are really not beating the lack of reading comprehension skills allegations. No thoughts, head empty.

I think it’s safe to say Bella would never return to Renée and Arizona. As much as she loves the city and the landscape, it is the site of her parentification, which Bella at some deep subconscious level recognizes and resents. Forks, bad weather and all, was when she really found her people, not to mention her love. And now that she is a vampire, the cold isn’t even a problem anymore.

Also, the fact that Bella blithely rationalizes away keeping Renée in the dark while keeping Charlie in the loop speaks volumes.

That’s right! Bella and Edward would never work out because they don’t have anything in common. I even made a whole list on how little they have in common, it’s astounding!

“Treats Resume awful” Source, please. Even in the dumbass movies Edward and Renesmee had a really lovely rapport with each other. It was one of the few moments Rob Pattinson did look like he was enjoying himself.

Bella “I have too much Charlie in me” Swan, going full Renee? It’s less likely than you think. Why do these clowns always have to stan Renee, the woman who literally made her child pay the bills?????

Also, “a woman who followed her own desires”…that is literally Bella with regards to Edward. She was the one who 100% on Edward’s icy D train while homeboy was still flailing over being Hades to her Persephone. She was the one who wanted to experience sex with Edward while still human even though he could have squished her like a bug.

It’s literally why I love this bitch (complimentary) to begin with. I admire that kind of NFG (No Fucks Given) in fictional characters. Characters that march to the beat of their own drum.

The Twilight fandom is really not beating the allegations.

Anyway, YMMV, but I’ve never read a more hetero bitch than Bella in my life, and I grew up on bodice rippers and telenovelas. Kristen Stewart’s Bella is not and will never be canon, so her sapphic vibes don’t count.

Tell me you’ve only seen the movies without telling me—