#avoidant anon

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - February 7th

Social Cues Anon, 14 anon, avoidant anon (new), disclaimer anon (new), therapist anon, yourself anon, tired anon (new)

Social Cues Anon

Heyyy- it's social cues anon!

And first I want to say I am sorryyyy I didn't mean to offend or anything by the 'passing', thing, it was a description and Its mostly my English sucking and I couldn't find a better wording than that, and also I am dumb and couldn't think it would offend- I obviously would never say anyone anything about their appearance if they didn't ask, it's not my business after all, I am sorry again I want you to know I didn't have any bad thoughts about it and I understand I should be more considerate.

Anyway, I apologized! Like, really I managed! He was so cute and accepting- (it actually took me a lot time to be forgiven and I understand it but I suffered lol😭/jk) anyway, after I apologized and explained I used it as a gender neutral term and never once viewed him as a woman etc- he was sad because people usually questions him about his gender and he isn't mad at me bc I didn't mean it like that and all those (because why would I, he said he was a man and I don't understand how he can be something else? I never questioned it, I am surprised others did.) anyway, we are good I guess? (Btw I will call him sev bc I don't remember if I gave him a name or not here)

I saw him at a cafe and I apologized him there, and sadly I had to pay for his coffee too, here goes my last 5€- tbh best money I spent. I was all so nervous and excited and so worried I don't know how I survived.

if I manage to actually talk I want to ask him if he wants to go to an art exhibit he talked about before- but I don't know if it would be weird, like yes, he forgave me but I don't know if I should invite him. I obviously would pay for it and all, but what if he doesn't want to come but feels obligated to because we are recently on good terms? I am so nervous😭😭 I don't have any other people I know who wants to go to the art exhibit.

And off topic but my other friend (let's call her Sara) she acts weird? Like we were studying in the library as a group and she insisted on not sitting near sev, and made me sit near him. I don't understand, she was getting along with him a week ago? She started to do those often, like we were talking with Sara and Sev came and Sara suddenly left? And she talks to him just fine on the phone or when I am not around, I saw from videos (silly videos for memories).

So did I do something why she does that I don't understand- I feel sad because Sara and her girlfriend are my close friends and I really like sev like he is so cute and so full of life he is great, he loves a lot of cool things, easy to talk, and naturally I want to hang out with him and my friends too since they are friends with him but Sara just don't? I hope I didn't do anything.. but it's probably not my business.. but I am worried.

I am sorry if I did/said anything wrong I didn't mean to

Hi! Please don't apologize, I don't want you to feel bad I just wanted to make sure you know. I'm glad you and Sev are doing better! Honestly I think you should ask him! It sounds like a really fun date and he sounds like a really cool guy!.

As far as Sara...whatever she's up to, it's not about you. I honestly can't decide if she doesn't like Sev or if she can tell you like Sev and is trying to help. But either way, you didn't do anything wrong <3

_________________________

14 anon

Hi <3 I'm so sorry I didn't get to this sooner. Please let me know how you are! I hope your mom didn;t get mad? Also please remember that if you're truly scared of your mom, that's something to consider telling another adult. You shouldn't be afraid of your mom <3

______________________

Avoidant Anon

Hey Cas! I hope you're well <3

I haven't really been on much, I opened this app like 30 minutes ago and saw your post and wanted to ask your thought or advice or anything at all because I'm gonna crash out soon if I don't get this out my chest.

So basically I don't know what to feel or do rn because my boyfriend's best friend seems like he has a crush on my bf and my bf sounds like he's having mixed feelings about him as well, when he told me he's been overthinking about his best friend and asked if he's giving "mixed signals" and said he wanna make sure he wasn't cheating on me and not hurting his best friend's feelings and also told me he doesn't know what he's feeling anymore which is sus to me but idk if I'm overthinking it and I'm confused as hell. He's also been distance and I'm giving him some space so he can deal with his feelings.

We've only been dating for a month and he's the first guy I've dated in like, 3 or 4 years because I stopped dating due to my avoidant attachment issues but I'm really healing for him and now this is all happening I have no idea what to feel or do and I don't wnana lose him to this because it's the first time I actually feel in love (if that make sense) and it's the first time I didn't run or feel uncomfortable when someone say they love/like me romantically. I am so confused and lost and I don't dare tell my friends about it because they'd definitely give the poor dude a hard time. I didn't expect my rant to be this long, I hope you don't mind😭

And Im so sorry if I confused you with my rant, I'm very confused as well🥹

Ty for reading this and I wish you the best <3

Hi <3 I completely understand why you're upset, I would be too! I think you're doing the best thing you can do- give him some space to figure his shit out. But also know that if this is too much for you, you have a right to tell him that and to break up with him. While I don't think he's doing anything wrong, it's still and upsetting and confusing situation, and you're allowed to not want to be in it.

I'm here for you and I'm sending you love. Keep me updated <3

_____________________

Disclaimer Anon

okay so disclaimer, i've identified as sapphic for a few years now so i'm not completely ignorant about the community and none of these questions are meant to be offensive i'm genuinely curious

i believe in the whole "sexuality and gender are fluid" and also "sexuality and gender aren't a choice, it's something we're born with" but they're actually a bit contradictory. like if it's something inherent, how can it change? i mean, you could say that you discovered a new part of yourself but like that explains identifying as pansexual after you've been going by bisexual because you're just expanding under the label of multisexuality and identifying as gay or lesbian after going by bisexual. but what about going from identifying as lesbian or gay or pansexual to identifying as bisexual? what about going from identifying as agender to trigender or another label under polygender?

I think for this, the idea is that even if things change, you can;t control how they change. Sexuality and gender are not a choice, you know? So even if your sexuality or gender changes over time, you don't decide that.

ik people can have like different romantic and sexual orientations but how? i don't mean it in the being aro but not ace (ace-spec is different from ace) and vice versa but being bisexual but homoromantic or being pansexual and biromantic like i kinda am confused about that

This is because people can be attracted to people in different ways than they want an emotional connection to people. Physical connection and emotional connection are different. For example, I'm finding that I can be attracted to any gender, but I really only can make emotional connections with non-men.

what's the whole concept of neopronouns and being a furry? i personally don't understand it but i'll respect it anyway but i want to try to understand it

Honestly, I'm not well-versed in either concept, either. I know neopronouns are just other pronouns besides she/he/they. People use them if those three do not feel right. But I don't know much more, nor do I know a lot about furries. But to me...if it's not hurting me or others, I respect it!

what's the whole he/him lesbian thing? disclaimer once again, i'm not hating but while i'm not completely ignorant about my own sexuality and it's definitions i'm also a bit unaware of certain things. like, by definition, lesbian means non men who like non men and i know he/him pronouns doesn't necessarily mean you identify as male but i'm still a bit confused about that? again, this is probably a bit ignorant of me but genderfluid people who like non men do fall under the category of lesbians right? but they also identify as men at times but again not always so i'm a bit confused

Honestly, I don't completely understand this one either. But again...it's not hurting anyone so I don't mind. I think labels and identities are so specific from person to person that as long as they're being genuinely used (not as a joke), that's totally within their right and I respect it.

i don't mean to offend or hate on anyone or question their right to identify as a certain label i'm just a bit confused and unaware of certain things

I don't think you're being offensive! It's okay to ask these questions! For the ones I don't know...honestly, if you can find someone with that identity willing to answer your questions, that might be your best bet.

If you have any more questions, feel free to send them! I'll do my best to answer!

___________________

Therapist Anon

Hi cassssss

Therapist anon here, am I allowed to be happy?

Stupid question but anywaysss

Recently I did a 30 marker for sociology (which I was forced to take cos the school sucks) and it was my first one ever and I spent way too fucking long on it BUT!!!!! I got 25/30 AND on another question I got 6/6!!!!!!

Please accept my apologies if I seem to be gloating I'm just really happy cos I didn't gwt the best grade in the winter exam so....I'm juts happy with my progress :)

Okay have a great day you're the best MWAH

OF COURSE you can be happy! That's amazing, and you should be so proud! I'm proud of you!

___________________

Yourself anon

Hi <3

Okay I want to make it clear: You are allowed to be very mad at your dad and still feel bad about what you did. Those two things don't have to rely on each other, they're separate situations. And it sounds like you have every right to be very mad at your dad. And I'm proud of you for telling him so.

But as far as what YOU did...I understand why you feel bad but it also sounds like it's not that simple. I'm nervous to say more because of the situation, but I really think you need to talk to someone about this. Do you have any trusted adult in your life you could share this with? I just know that all seems like it could be really confusing, but I think you're holding way too much guilt.

___________________

Tired anon

Here's the beginning of your post!

Hello, I am so tired. I know I am being emotionally ridiculous but I really need to rant. First things first: I know I need therapy, it is expensive, I feel too bad for spending so much money on something that just generally doesn’t seem like it works for me. Two: I am using fake names so dw about privacy stuff, and at last three, I do curse a bunch in here, sorry, I usually try not to, but I am feeling very strongly rn and sometimes it just slips.

Hi <3

It sounds like you're going through a LOT right now and you're feeling overwhelmed. I think talking to your mom kind of depends on how things with her have been in the past. Is she usually receptive? If so, then yes, try it. If not, do you have another adult you can talk to?

Either way though, I really want to try to convince you to try therapy. I know it seems like a waste but I promise it's not. Not only that, but a lot of colleges offer it for free!

Also I want you to know that I know things feel crazy right now but I believe in you and I know you can do this. You are NOT a failure, and you're doing great.

Sending love <3

[yuukirita]

Hiii I love your art, it’s been my fuel for the past couple weeks lmao

So I wanted to just say

Baby bee doesn’t cry in front of anyone, right?

But what if one day he gets like super hurt (like broken arm/ smashed leg idk) and since he’s just a baby he doesn’t know what else to do but cry like a baby would

And so all the bots are freaking the freak out cuz

A. omg the baby is so injured (or whatever)

B. They’ve never seen him cry!!!!! They don’t know what todo!!! They’re all new parents!!!!!!!!!

mmmmmmm Yes.

I'm so glad you like my art! I like my art too! Hope this fuels you for many more weeks to come! :D

[technically-human]

THEY CANCELLED DEAD BOY DETECTIVES :(((

Guess they belong to me the fandom now

[shepscapades]

SHEP

DRAW MORE SLEEPY XISUMA

AND MY LIFE IS YOURS

(no pressure of <3)

ANYTHING FOR YOU ANONYMOUS

[bigassbowlingballhead]

my first suggestion to enjoying fandom more will always be get the fuck off twitter. just do it.

[jesuistrestriste]

girl you're literally the best writer here. Please please pleaaaaaaase can you do a part 2 of fwb Art who gets attached to you quickly 🛐 I'M BEGGING YOU

< pt 2 to this >

well.

you caved.

goddamnit, you caved quick too.

as soon as those tears spilled down his cheeks and into the crook of your neck, it was over. you wonder if maybe he weaponized his emotions a little to get you to stay, but it doesn’t really matter now, does it?

you did as he begged for you to do; you stayed the night with him. you expected that maybe he would try to have sex with you again, but it never happened.

as soon as you agreed to not go back to your own bed, he pressed kisses over your neck and held you tight. he gave you one of his loose stanford tennis tees and a pair of his boxers for you to sleep in, and then he coaxed you under the sheets. no grinding, no handsy touches, nothing.

he just laid there with you, breathing softly and comfortably as he rested his head on your chest, and fell asleep. you stared at the ceiling for most of the night just thinking ‘what the hell have i just gotten myself into’. if only you’d had the strength to refuse him before, because now you could tell he was in it.

bad.

you wake up in the morning after a night of inner turmoil and feel a comfortable weight behind you. a ghost of warmth pressed up against your back, and oh god, he’s spooning you. his arms are wrapped around your torso and his legs are tangled with yours.

you try to very quietly shift out of his hold, grabbing onto the side of his bed and pulling yourself towards it, but he just whines softly in his sleep and then tugs you right back flush to his chest. you sigh. you cave again, and let him keep you.

the both of you stay that way for another thirty minutes before art nuzzles into your shoulder and starts to stir. he presses three kisses to your neck as he sits up, and then gazes lazily down at you with lidded eyes as he takes in the sight of your features in the sunlight creeping through his blinds.

he’s only ever seen you in the dark; after parties and in response to your 1 AM bootycalls. how could he have ever gone this long without seeing you like this? the way your skin shines, the depth of the color in your irises, the little crevices and dips in your nose and cheeks and chin that make you look like you were lovingly sculpted by the hands of an artist. like you were someone’s muse.

you can see it in the way he looks down to you.

there’s going to be absolutely no (easy) way to get out of whatever you just started with him. one night changed everything. at least in his mind, you were sure of it.

he reaches a hand up and brushes his thumb over your lips, studying you before he knows you’ll turn away.

and then his lips are pressing down to yours. a soft, sweet, tender gesture that says so much more than you necessarily want from him. he only pulls back to whisper one thing, his eyes holding the same—almost nervous—vulnerability that they had the night before when he had weeped a plea into your frame.

“so..” he chews the inside of his cheek, “can i make you breakfast..?”

…

oh boy.

[gyuwoncheol]

Seungcheol is the embodiment of that “when I tell you to sit on my face don’t just hover, f’ing sit on it” quote you can’t convince me otherwise ☺️

TW: oral sex (f. receiving), face sitting, pussy drunk! Cheol, dirty talk, use of pet names. 18+ only (MDNI).

Note: Anon, what have u done.

Tagging @multi-kpop-fanfics because i definitely was not plotting (luv u 😘)

“Princess, sit down.”

“I am!” You argue back, looking down at the face sandwiched in between your legs. Seungcheol’s blonde locks were sticking out in awkward places, his lips puffy from all the making out and pupils blown out it was almost all black.

“No, you’re not. You’re hovering!” He stated matter of factly. His large hands came to wrap around your things before pulling you down closer to his mouth but you resisted, anchoring yourself on the headboard.

Cheol’s never asked you to do this and when he mentioned it in the heat of the moment, you breathlessly said yes, but now that you’re actually here, you’re almost sure you’re going to suffocate him.

“Fuck,” you sucked in a deep breath when his wet tongue licked a bold stripe from your hole to your clit, making the filthiest slurping sound known to mankind.

“Feel good, baby?” You nodded with eyes shut, “it’ll feel even better if you just. sit. down. properly,” your boyfriend fought, annoyance in his tone.

“Cheol!” You shrieked when you felt your pussy envelope his mouth fully, lifting yourself up in haste but to no avail, “what if I suffocate you and you die?!”

A drunken smile graced your boyfriend’s features, “then that’s the best way to go.”

“Choi Seungcheol! I am serious! I don’t want to kill you!”

“And I’m fucking serious too! You won’t kill me, trust me okay?” There was a momentary look of softness and assurance on his face, letting you know he knew what he was doing and he wouldn’t let anything bad happen. But that look quickly morphed back to a scheming one, complete with an eyebrow raised at you. “Now, sit the fuck down, or I will tie your hands behind your back.”

[shhhsecretsideblog]

You can't be pushing now. I lean forward and maneuver my hand so I can get my fingers into your pussy. You squirm as my fingers go through your swollen, then a small whimper when my two fingers reach my cervix. You're 10 centimeters. I hide my fear as best I can. If you pushed, this baby was going to shoot through you fast. My mind races, searching for any solution that the OB handbooks and websites listed. Most of them involved drugs that we obviously didn't have. Dehydration and sitting so baby was being pulled down probably weren't helping you, but it wouldn't matter if you thought you could and should push. Make up my mind right there. You don't want our baby on a plane and I'd make it so you didn't as best as I could.

"Resist pushing."

"I don't think I can anym-"

"Don't push you're only 7 centimeters dilated. You can make it, ok," I snap and grasp your hand. "Trust me."

You look at me for a moment then nod. Your eyes were watery, red. It hurts to lie to you like this.

"My love, if you can, I need you to shift on your side. It should slow contractions, for a bit maybe."

We just have to hope the stewards don't notice. You shift slightly, you can't fit your bump between the arm rests but I hope the shift in position is enough. I give you my water and dab the sweat from your brow.

~~~

The changed position didn't last long. The stewards reprimanded us for being in unsafe positioning and had you back in your seat proper after two hours. I have no idea if it helped but last time I checked you the head had only moved a bit in your canal. Your breathing was low, deep, and hastening as you resisted the urge to push. Your face squenches hard, but you maintain the facade of the uncomfortable pregnant lady to the stewards when they pass.

I keep lying about how slow your dialation is with the hope it would help with your resistance. We're so close now. So close...

[Part I]

It was our first baby, my first pregnancy, I didn’t know what to expect… but oh god the pressure. I didn’t expect so much pressure. I did my best to breath through the contractions, which felt constant at this stage, barely any time between them.

I was panting through my nose and groaning behind my closed mouth. My legs were wide apart in the narrow chair, my bump sat heavily between my thighs and brushed against the damp cushion. As I held my contracting dome with both hands, I ignored the overwhelming desire to push. You said I was only 7.5cms dilated, you told me I wasn’t ready to push, and I put all my faith and trust in you, unable to think of anything besides my breathing. And holding off from pushing.

Even though I was not dilated enough, the baby felt like it was one push away from coming out. It felt like the head was right there, bulging my lips, but it couldn’t be. I wasn’t dilated enough for that. Breathe. Don’t push. Breath. Don’t push.

My head lolled onto your shoulder, my body exhausted and trembling. You wrapped your arms over my bump before one hand disappeared beneath my shorts.

“Ohhhhh babe I really need to p-pushhhh….” I whimpered as you examined me again.

“Not yet, you’re not dilated enough.” You assured and kissed the side of my sweaty face.

“A-are you s-sure?” I panted quietly. “It feels like it’s coming outttttt…..mnghhhhh!” Suddenly I’m pushing.

“No! Stop pushing!” You cried and put your hand between my legs again.

“I can’t help it- oh fuck nghhhhhh!”

“Ok if you need to push, just small pushes. Quietly.” You say and I can feel the counter pressure you're making at my opening. But I don’t question it, consumed by the green light you gave me to push.

My chin is on my chest, my arms are grabbing the arm rests, and I bear down silently spreading my legs wider.

“Oh it’s coming out…” I gasp.

“No it’s not.” You say confidently, before adding under your breath “I won’t let it.”

[glassofpumpkinjuice]

andy gets his phone hacked, pete and patrick laugh at him :(

(iheartradio fest 9/22/23)

[stealingpotatoes]

*hands you a pair of sunglasses*

Woah, I knew you were a sweet potato, but I didn't realize you're a hot potato too 😎

(enjoy a funny flirt, your blog is amazing and I love your Star Wars art!! May the Force be with you Jedi Master Potes!!)

[oifaaa]

jason being aroace is canon to me. be the change you want to see in the wo rld

he is the most aroace character to me if I have to think of a male aroace character the first man I'm thinking of is Mr jason todd (followed closely by monkey D. Luffy but shhh)

[mblue-art]

late halloweeen dooodleee

[mychlapci]

ohoho, i have been rotating the idea of Megatron having Orion's sparkling and raising it to hate Optimus Prime for a while... Megatron doesn't keep his spawn's origin a secret, it knows that Orion Pax was its sire and that Optimus Prime is a sick caricature of that very bot.

It'd be especially heartbreaking if word gets out to Optimus that his and Megatron's sparkling survived and that it's part of his army now... maybe he even tries to connect with it...

[arttsuka]

I think Jed and Octavius would be so cute as little ferrets :0

They're sleeping 💤

[etoilesbienne]

oh wait actually my real request for the qsmp fandom is this:

stop sharing bad tumblr takes to twitter. i don't care what you're reasoning is, unless its a private five follower account and youre complaining to friends, you have zero reason to be putting bad faith criticisms that were already hidden on a site barely used by cc onto the site they DO use and possibly right in front of them. we wouldn't be in this mess if people weren't reposting anon hate of all things onto twitter for some reason.

by all means, share fun analysis! share positive longform thought posts! don't share anon hate death threats being sent to other fans. stop feeding trolls. don't answer asks like that either. it just gives people the satisfaction of a reply. delete it and make them seethe and move on with your life.

[utilitycaster]

I truly have no patience for "criticizing a creative choice is disrespectful" as a statement. If you can't tell the difference between sending hate or harassing creators/fans, vs. saying "I didn't like this and here's why" you are an idiot. And on the flip side if you're a creator and someone says "I didn't like this" without any sort of personal attacks or hate involved, simply on the basis of critique and personal preference, and that makes you feel bad enough to stop creating then maybe you should step back and either get offline or make room for someone who has an actual creative vision that isn't "I want everyone to like me."