#autistic allegory posting

[cloudemojisworld]

[dandelionjack]

psykers are a brilliant unintentional allegory for neurodivergent people. widely believed to be freaks that should be bullied into submission and socially sacrificed to oil the great big inhumane war machine; UNLESS our highly specialised skillset and oddball traits prove useful to that very system — if we can control ourselves, if we can pass standardised testing after suffering gruelling ordeals and abuse from all sides; if we can be just weird wyrd enough that our ~special talents~ show, but not so weird that we’re unable to adapt, the system will forgive us for our curse. still keeping us at a distance and making sure we don’t take a step out of line. we can make a living that way, as sanctioned pariahs tolerated only for their niche (dis)abilities. for a while. until it drives us crazy

oh and unmedicated adhd does sometimes feel like a portal to a hell dimension is always clawing at the back of your skull but that’s irrelevant

[kernsing]

bestowing the highest honor i can give to fictional characters on han yoohyun, the quadruple a battery headcanon pack (autistic aroace agender)

[yael-art-den]

(1/2) Karim backstory. Idk when I'll continue writing this summary but this is all pre-Fort Joy and a bit post

First things first: noble family, elven mother & human father, both VERY notable Source sorcerers. Mom left the veneration of the Elder Trees (unfortunately elves in the setting are Like That) to join human society in the form of Investigation and Development of the Arcane (for war. It was for war), which in a kingdom that's at war every two plot beats against Multidimensional Threats, turns out to be a very profitable endeavor. They're new money, but as long as they can keep working with the Order for a couple more generations, it will secure their lineage a very comfortable spot.

Sorcery is not fully inherited, but it is fairly common as long as it's nurtured properly, and everything works out for the firstborn and secondborn (Karin's older brothers). Sister turns out fine, she's not a natural like the first one or can learn her way into getting magic like the second one, but it hits right before being a pre-teen. She's just a bit more artsy about her magic, whatever. The two elders got engaged extremely quickly to strengthen political bonds between houses, she can get to be the "artistic, creative soul" as long as you quit that shit after a few years and get a political marriage soon. Chop chop!

Then Karim comes into the picture. The youngest. Doesn't show any signs of sorcery early on, but that's okay, he can learn how to- oh you are not good at studying? And unable to perform basic spells? Well, I'm sure it will awaken soon. You MUST be doing something wrong. Everyone is Getting It very early on, so there must be something wrong with you, in particular. Why are you like that? Are you doing it wrong on purpose?

Early teenage years hit and he's still Source-less. He has never been treated badly, but there is this non-spoken known secret around him that he's not an equal. To make up for this shame, he needs to be Perfect in everything else (behavior, manners, studies) because it's BAD enough that your mom has to make excuses for you about why you haven't Awoken yet, he cannot make it worse. No one forces him to do this, but it gives him a slight hint of hope, of control. If he works hard enough, sacrifices enough, he will get there.

He doesn't.

He's the youngest, he cannot be married off yet, so his family's best option for him is to join the military and get status that way. He doesn't join as a private, of course, but as a paladin squire to start working upwards. Of course he's a sorcerer, but his call is for the Divine Order and to become a knight. So his family gets both an excuse for his Source-less behavior AND get the unmarriable kid sent away. Win-win.

Military life WAS an improvement tho. There was something soothing about knowing exactly what to do, how to do it, who was in command and what was being asked of you. At this point Karim is already a master of "i cannot be left alone with my thoughts I need to Always Do Stuff", and there was always something to be done. Mantras to be repeated while on watch so he wouldn't have to take a single look inside himself.

He was to be treated as this almost saint-like figure, a Sorcerer, of course, but someone who refused to use his powers for the sanctity of Knighthood. He was never a particularly bellicose person, and he tried to shape his paladin persona into more of a War Medic role, whose healing powers helped the real, actual medicine he knew.

This was his place, or the closest thing he had ever felt to belonging somewhere. He was loved (for something he didn't do), and respected (for a persona that he wasn't) but his near-null introspective meant that this was enough for him.

Be content, and be grateful. Be admired, but never understood. And above all, be useful.

When the Magister reform hit and all non-humans were removed from their positions at the Order, he was spared because his family pulled some strings and "well he's just HALF elf. He doesn't look Like That©. And he has a beard!" but it doesn't mean that the new racist policies didn't hit him hard. The only reasonable option in his mind was to work harder, to prove he deserved his spot to people who wanted to see him gone. It's okay, if only he's a good enough boy he will be fine!!!!

THEN the order to render all magic illegal and send sorcerers to Fort Joy is sent. His family is in grave danger, but like it happens inside the game, a lot of bad situations can be made easier with money. They bribe their way into hiding, but letting them ALL go would be obvious, plus the Magisters need reassurance that they won't turn on them once they're safely out of the city. And so, without his knowledge or consent, Karim gets used as a bargain chip.

The only thing he gets told is that he is to be sent to the Fort as a prisoner to keep his family safe, so they don't have to go. He will be fine, he isn't a sorcerer after all, it's just bureaucracy. He just needs to go through whatever cure they're administering and then come back, good as new!

He, of course, goes with it. Even when he discovers that that place WILL be his grave and he got sent there to die, he still wanted to stay. To be martyrd and to finally deserve love, even in death. He helped the party escape and they, in return, pretty much forced him to go with them (so this dumbass didnt DIE)

He still has a long way to go. He's now an actual sorcerer and Godwoken, so more outside pressure on him to perform his role, yippeee... But having a group of people who genuinely like him for himself and don't want anything in return is helping

[stinkrascal]

having ocs and posting them on the internet is so embarrassing bc whenever i rewrite an oc or retcon something im just like oh fuck. you arent sneaky stinky. everyone saw that. its the same feeling i get whenever someone sees me trip its like i just rolled a 0 on dexterity

[cloudemojisworld]

[just-spacetrash]

🧛

[vampiricalblob]

Every once in awhile I’m writing straight vampire romance and I actually wanna die bc I am Mormon right??? There is a constant fear at the back of my mind that I am no better than Smeyer and I’m just reinventing Twilight. Except I am not a coward and I am not afraid of erotic blood drinking or for my guys to do premarital sex

[emberwhite]

So as I have been making my rounds posting about my book across all social media, some people take a look at my cover, get confused, and ask me at point blank, "Wait. Does this book support trans people or not?"

Of course I support trans people (that's the whole point of the book!), but I don't want to use any language that could be interpreted as political by your average Joe that is turned off by any politics. You lose reach that way. I think the book could have a larger impact by using language to make the story more universal to all people. With the right message, it could be seen an an allegory that applies to not only trans people but anyone who feels like they don't fit in with the tribe.

Yes, I did decide to go with the animal metaphor for the book in spite of some hot social issues going on right now. There were previously two books that used that metaphor to make a crude political point. I don't care too much for that, but if you read them, you're ultimately left with the feeling that they discourage children from play and imagination. I used to teach kindergarten and elementary students, so I felt there was something deeply upsetting about that. It was shortly after that I felt I HAD to make this book, no matter what. I saw the stigma around the analogy as a challenge.

The good news is that after talking with other trans people about it the overwhelming majority seem to like the end result. And since the book's launch, I've had so many furries, therians, and autistic people thank me for making the book. There's something about the experience of what it is like to utterly deny things that are inevitably part of the self yet completely oppose the tribe and the regrets we ultimately face because of it. A lot of people can relate to that. It is the heart of the struggle of all humanity and society. That is culture, not politics.

So there you have it. "The Boy Who Wanted to Be a Deer" is now available on Amazon, or you can read the whole thing for free on YouTube.

If you would like to support the book, ratings on Amazon and Goodreads are the best way to do so.

[herrscherofmagic]

after posting this last night, I kept wondering "hmmm I wonder why I got so attached to Rappa's character so quickly??"

like not just in a normal "oh that character has cool story/gameplay, I like that" way, but in a "i swear to all that is holy that this is one of my all-time favorite characters" way

and then I thought about how this reminded me of how I quickly got attached to Misteln... and then it hit me.

the secret sauce that makes Rappa's character so appealing to me, in the same way Mistlen was?

autism.

GOD DAMNIT

So, I just finished the new Trailblaze Continuance mission (no spoilers here), and I'd like to share my thoughts. Although I haven't done the event that follows, so no spoilers for that please x-x

All i have to say is... what the f***!??!

/pos btw, this is a "WTF" in all the right ways

Out of all the crazy things that happened throughout the game's story so far... I don't know how Mihoyo managed to go even further off the rails.

and still write a beautiful story with a shockingly deep message.

and also weave in the iconic Trauma(tm) here and there.

I'm still processing what the in the name of the Aeons I just witnessed

Anyways, on a totally unrelated note, I hereby declare myself a ninja initiate!

[aroaceleovaldez]

reminder that the only reason the "ADHD is actually demigod BATTLE STRATEGIES" and "dyslexia is DEMIGOD BRAINS HARDWIRED FOR ANCIENT GREEK" things exist in the PJO universe is because it's a very direct reference to early 2000s teaching/parenting techniques for neurodiverse and disabled children, which aimed to frame childrens' disabilities and hardships as a "superpower" or strength so that the children would feel more positively about their disabilities or situations. This technique has fallen out of favor since then for the most part since more often than not it just results in kids feeling as though their struggles are not being seen or taken seriously.

Yes, demigods are adhd/dyslexic (and sometimes autistic-coded) in the series. This is extremely important and trying to remove it or not acknowledge it makes the entire series fall apart because it is such a core concept. Yes, canon claims that their adhd/dyslexia is tied to some innate abilities, which is based on an outdated methodology. It's important to acknowledge that and understand where it comes from! But please stop trying to apply it to other pantheons in the series like "oh, the romans have dyscalculia because of roman numerals!" or "the norse demigods have dysgraphia for reasons!" - it's distasteful at best.

A better option is to acknowledge the meta inspiration for why that exists in the series, such as explaining potentially that Chiron was utilizing that same teaching methodology to try and help demigods feel more comfortable with their disabilities and they aren't literal powers. In fact, especially given Frank, there's implication that being adhd/dyslexic isn't a guaranteed demigod trait, which means it's more likely to be normally inherited from their godly parent/divine ancestor as a general trait, not a power, and further supports the whole "ADHD is battle strategy" thing being non-literal. It also implies the entire greco-roman pantheon in their universe is canonically adhd/dyslexic - and that actually fits very well with the themes of the first series. The entire central conflict of the first series fits perfectly as an allegory about neurodiverse/disabled children and their relationships with their undiagnosed neurodiverse/disabled parents and trying to find solutions together with their shared disability/disabilities that the kid inherited instead of becoming distant from each other (and this makes claiming equivalent to getting a diagnosis which is a fascinating allegory! not to mention the symbolism of demigods inheriting legacies and legends and powers from their parents and everything that comes with that being equivalent to inheriting traits, neurodiversity, and disabilities from your parents).

anyways neurodiversity and disability and the contexts in which the series utilizes representation of those experiences particularly during the 2000s symbolically within the narrative is incredibly important to the first series and the understanding of what themes it means to represent. also if i see one more "the romans have dyscalculia instead of dyslexia" post in 2023 i'm gonna walk into the ocean.

[peepeepy]

a lot of people who've watched gravity falls think that stanford is unsympathetic or a bad character, and most of the people who dont think that think stanford is at least selfish and flawed, which i can't really refute, but it always made me feel so awful, and i never realized why until now.

if you look at stanford pines as an allegory for a child with a developmental disability like autism or a "gifted kid", then a lot of the pieces start to fall together.

⚠️spoilers for gravity falls, the website, and maybe a bit of the book of bill⚠️

stanford pines was born with an "extra finger", a symbol for a disability. for a while, everyone thought it was a flaw. he was teased and shunned by his peers,

but then, people began to notice his genius. it even says on thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com, when you enter "sixer" or "stanford", that he has a "hyper-ability", something many people will say about "gifted" autistic people.

as soon as people started to point this out, everything felt like it made sense to ford. as a person who grew up with autism, i can relate to feeling alienated from my peers, and wondering "why? why, in a world made for normal people, was i made wrong?"

that kind of thought can lead to a sort of delusion.. that maybe you were destined for something great. maybe you were different because one day you would use it to change the world. i believe this is the way ford felt when he was approached by bill

bill came to ford and told him everything he'd ever wanted to hear.. that this feeling was real. that he was destined for greatness. that he was better, smarter, more special than the ones who had shunned him.

bill told ford that building the portal would make him a hero, make people finally see him as more than an extra finger. the one problem?

bill was a liar.

he used ford's selfish thoughts to trick him into making a gateway that would end the world. he used the years of mockery, the alienation, the loneliness, and he came to ford when he was alone, trapped, with nowhere to go.

he offered ford the opportunity to get back at a world that was built to knock him down at every turn, a world full of people who would never understand him. he offered to make ford a god.

and ford refused

he refused, even in a world that had done nothing but tear him down, to hurt others just to feel better about himself. he only had a few people who had ever cared for him, and yet, he was willing to destroy his life's work to save everyone who had made him miserable.

remember, he fully intended to stay trapped in the portal for all of eternity. that's why he was so frustrated when stanley brought him back. what we saw as a heroic act from stanley, ford saw as stanley refusing the sacrifice he had made to save him. he didn't thank stanley because nobody thanked him. no one thanked him for his hard work or sacrifice or his years of suffering just to protect stanley.

that, of course, led to this scene, which many people saw as stanford's most frustrating moment.

i think this post sums up really well why stanford, in this dire moment, would choose to insult his brother. because stanley was being selfish, too. stanley refused to help save the world, save his brother, all because ford never said "thank you."

they were both selfish. everyone is. they didn't fight because they were bad people, but because they both saw things from their own perspective. they were each hopelessly lonely without each other, but both too prideful to admit it.

in the end, they make up, and both follow their true dream. not money, not fame, just staying together.

stanford pines is not a bad, unsympathetic character. he is a complex, misdirected, "gifted" child. his only flaw was not seeing that he wasn't alone. his family was right there to support him the whole time.

[cosmicbucket]

hey hi. about nimona. yes it's 100% about being trans. but as a nonbinary autistic person? this movie was really touching in ways I didn't even realise were possible.

the entire train scene actually killed me.

"Can you please just be normal for a second? I just think it’d be ... easier if you look human."

"Easier for who?"

"For you. A lot of people aren’t as accepting as me."

then, when Ballister asks what shapeshifting feels like - if it hurts - the way Nimona responds hits very close to home on my experience with stimming.

"Honestly? I feel worse when I don’t do it. Like my insides are itchy. You know that second right before you sneeze? That’s close to it. Then I shapeshift, and I’m free."

And then. "What if you held it in?"

"... I just... sure wouldn’t be living."

not to mention in the original comic, Nimona's parents believe that she's something synonymous to a changeling - that she's something that replaced their "real child". this myth was likely born as an "explanation" for neurodivergent or developmentally disabled children. the townsfolk talk about her getting "better" in the comic. as if there's a cure for the way she is. which is something autistic people deal with all the fucking time.

to end on a more lighthearted note, "I'm not a girl. I'm a shark." was so real of Nimona. I'm so happy they kept that in from the comic, because it was real when I was younger and it's even more real to me now.

this story is a trans allegory loud and proud. I do not want to discredit that with this post. but this story also makes me, an autistic person, feel seen. and that's so fucking important in today's world.

I love this movie to pieces. Please go watch it, and remember to be kind. You will change someone's life for the better.

[i-can-kazoo]

Baby's first zine!

I finished drawing my first ever zine! It's by no means professional, but I hope you enjoy.

Under the cut I've placed the pages in order, as well as a short explanation for each one.

The first page is the reason I decided to make this zine. I was braiding my younger cousin's hair, and my father walked in with a video of the hostages being released.

Pages 2 and 3: these are lyrics to a song I learned as a child: Be Proud That You're a Jew, by Avrumi Flam.

Pages 4 and 5: a picture of the kosel, and far more prominently a picture of the Dome of the Rock. It seems to take over every picture of the kosel.

Pages 6 and 7: a quote from Wicked, and a picture of me. I gave myself goat eyes, to parallel Doctor Dillamond — I think the Animals in Wicked make a fantastic Jewish allegory. The horns are not goat horns, but have been added due to the antisemitic myth that jews have horns.

Pages 8 and 9: Elon Musk's nazi salute, and my sister's response. I have never told her that I am autistic, and I likely never will.

Pages 10 and 11: an ad for swastika accessories that popped up on tumblr a while back, and a disappointingly typical tumblr post.

Page 12: three methods of identifying jews throughout history, and one modern. The yellow hat is from 1260s Vienna, the yellow tunic is from the Abbasid caliphate, and the yellow star is from nazi Germany.

[demilypyro]

There's a thought/theory/whatever I've long had about a specific pair of episodes from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine ever since I was a teen, and I'm putting this post out there to see if anybody else had the same thought.

I think Julian Bashir from Deep Space Nine, especially his plotline about having been genetically altered at a young age, is a commentary on neurodivergency.

Bashir is characterized as being highly intelligent, albeit lacking in social insight. He excels in academic matters but frequently finds himself floundering around women, being led by the nose by more charismatic people, and not picking up what other people are putting down. This alone would make him the average stereotypical TV depiction of an autistic person, but what I want to focus on is the episode that provides a canonical reason for these traits: the season 5 episode Doctor Bashir, I Presume.

In this episode it's revealed, or retconned really, that Bashir owes his intelligence to genetic tempering. Bashir originally suffered from a learning disability. He was not as intelligent as other children his age, falling far behind his peers, and his parents resorted to illegally altering his genes to "cure" that disability. As a result he instead became exceedingly intelligent. In essence, it took away a symptom that made his life more difficult, and traded it for one that made him more functional.

That episode on its own isn't a super strong nod towards autism. Though it does establish that Bashir is at least neurodivergent, it's more a discussion on eugenics and the theoretical ethics of removing disabilities through genetics. What I really want to focus on is the sort-of-sequel to this episode, and the only other episode that really focuses on these themes: the season 6 episode "Statistical Probabilities." In this episode, Bashir sets out to help other people who underwent genetic alteration, but for whom the treatments didn't go as well. The people he meets all display symptoms of one neurodivergency or another. One of them is very hyperactive and lacks empathy, another is very childlike despite being an old man, and another is entirely unresponsive.

For me, as someone who grew up in special education, I couldn't help but recognize some of the people I knew. To me, the metaphor was clear: "genetic alteration" was really just sci-fi talk for neurodivergency. Julian was the savant, the high-functioning autistic person who successfully integrated into society, because his neurodivergency gave him intelligence and insight that made him useful. And the others weren't as lucky, struggling to lead normal lives because their symptoms impeded their ability to function by themselves.

Bashir spends the episode trying to prove that the other genetically altered people have something to offer society, that there is a place for them. It felt very on the nose to me. But no one I've seen talk about this pair of episodes ever seemed to have taken from them what I took from them. I can't find anyone else online who interpreted the episodes the same way. Maybe my perspective is very particular, as someone who spent so much time in special education growing up, and who has personally struggled with finding a place where I can offer something to others. But idk. Am I seeing allegories that aren't there? What do yall think?

[unheavenlycreatures]

Another thing that The Murderbot Diaries makes me think about is the concept of someone's birth being unethical in and of itself, and how to reconcile that with loving and supporting them. Wells touches on it briefly in Rogue Protocol in regards to GoodNightLander and their laws surrounding SecUnits, but while I wouldn't call it one of the main themes, it just kind of weighs uncomfortably in the air-

A SecUnit is made to cause pain, to feel pain, and to be disposed of when it is no longer more valuable than the sum of its parts. It is made sapient so it can feel every ounce of boredom and pain that it is put through. There is an extent to which the creation of a SecUnit is, in and of itself, an act of cruelty by its creator.

Where we're at right now, Murderbot seems to have a rather low view of other SecUnits. It knows what it wants, and it knows who it is, to an extent, but what does it think about a SecUnit's place in society in general? What does it think of in regards to a long term solution? Does it think one exists?

Then, also: Murderbot is an invaluable asset to anyone that it offers its allegiance to. But that then begs the question for Preservation, for PUoMaNT: How do you support, love, and care for a person who has been traumatized by having been brought into the world in the first place? How do you heal the wound that is the crime of your birth?

Then, taking it to its logical conclusion: How do you draft up laws and policies so as to support a person while not condoning the act of their creation? How do you make it clear to the person in question that they are worth of love and care, while also wrestling with whether they should ever have been brought into existence in the first place?

Preservation can make laws establishing constructs as autonomous individuals, but what next, and what will those laws do in regards to the rhetoric surrounding them?

How do you reconcile making space for someone's existence in a utopian society, without saying the thing that you are thinking, which is: In a perfect world, you would never have been created?

And maybe this is just me being deep in the paint in regards to allegory for disability here. As someone who has been in leftist spaces where the existence of disabled individuals in post-capitalist society is a problem that needs to be fixed, as someone who grew up autistic in an anti-vax household, as someone whose existence is often rather inconvenient for the folks planning their jobs in the metaphorical post-capitalist communal homesteads.

I mean, to be certain, I don't have literal guns in my arms, but I am genuinely interested as to how the post-capitalist societies in TMBD intend to handle people whose very existence is, through no fault of their own, antithetical to their values.