#at this point i wanna die
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My daughter is in a screaming phase. She just spends the whole day shrieking and screaming and I have had the most terrible headache. The last night's she cried for a Minimum of two hours because of the teeth and today everything was fine. I did everything I could and it was fine. We fell asleep. I wake up 45 minutes later to her screaming again and I just can't take it anymore. I've had too little sleep and I've been around her for the last 3 days... Even when I was interacting with her she was still in the same room screeching. My husband complained after two hours and honestly next time he does I'm gonna tell him to shut up about it. I haven't stopped crying for an hour cause now I can't sleep again cause I'm so agitated. I hate mother hormones. I hate not being allowed to sleep. I hate headaches. I don't want to get up and finish all the chores.
#ignore me#somehow all of this is going to a very toxic direction and i dont think my husband even notices#i cant stand his whining about free time and wjatever other shit he complains about#I'm stuck with the kid for days snd even my days of are hakf days at best where i sleep a few extra hours and he spend the rest of my free#time around me or i do shit for the house#i just wann die#at this point i wanna die#and all the people I'd ask are too busy or i know that she wojt saty for longer than an hour with them#i screamrd at her to shut up cause i couldn't take it#i cant do this anymore#she spits out her stupid pacifiers and then cries about it not being in her mouth#i had to hold it with a little force so she would be able to suck on it and get back to sleep#i pass out while breastfeeding cause i am too exhausted#I'm gonna have to take care of all the new clothes that will arrive soon which will be an extra day of work and honestly i dont have a day#i barely have enough time for me#there sre says i dont eat so i make everyone else happy cause i just feel like i dont matter#now my brother needs help with resumes and i know nobody else will help him but he needs something soon or it will fuck up his life#my parents are getting older and it sometimes tests my patience that i have to baby their feelings again#and my sister's health is so bad i dont wanna ask her#also most of my friends are busy or sick themselves#well anyways gotta go clean and prepare everything for tomorrow
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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target practice
#i wanna draw this as like a nice big drawing at some point#so if u see this exact concept again#yeah#consider this practice#maybe ill do it over christmas break or smth#Because Lord Knows I Dont Have Time Rn#anyways#yttd#kimi ga shine#your turn to die#kgs#yttd fanart#maple#maple yttd
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Hello, do-not-make-Mirabelle-angry gang, I present to you @ksenya-and-the-artistic-cucumber being really funny with scattered context
#the king saying this whenever he does his big attack. shows you horrible vision that defeats you. oohh you wanna let him win so badd#isat spoilers#in stars and time#isat#mirabelle isat#the king isat#art#fanart#kitscribbles#THERE ARE LITERALLY SO MANY POINTS. WHERE THE KING IS LIKE 'you should let me do this. you should definitely die here. i am telling you to'#RUDE AS HELL#how do i warning tag this meme#tw kys joke#kys mention#kys
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I have finally finished 2.4 and oh my GOD watching Dan Heng be so protective of his friends nearly killed me, MY HEART.
And yes, the cutscene where he pushes the trailblazer out of the way and even cushions their fall with his own body, but I mean even before that! When he was already trying to protect them and March 7th from Feixiao and Lingsha!!
Because if you watch the dango trio throughout the main quest, you'll notice that they often position themselves in the same way, which is a detail that makes me super happy that Hoyo thought to include- when the three of them aren't evenly spaced, March 7th and the trailblazer tend to gravitate towards each other and stand very close together, frequently side-by-side. And by comparison, Dan Heng usually stands slightly away, and often even slightly behind them, where he can pull on their leashes to wrangle them keep an eye on them.
This is probably a habit learned through experience, since March 7th said during Belobog she is the "queen of unannounced disappearances" fjdksajfkldjsak
And of course at least a little bit of it is just done for like, aesthetic purposes. It's a video game. Things have to look nice for the player. The trailblazer and Dan Heng are the same height, March 7th is a bit shorter, and Yanqing is even smaller. It makes sense to have the trailblazer and Dan Heng stand on the ends, with March 7th and Yanqing in the middle, it just looks nicer and more balanced that way. But still! Even when they're accommodating for Yanqing in this quest, they still all arrange themselves the same way, almost every time!
But this changes after Dan Heng and Yanqing become suspicious of the visitors from the Yaoqing.
The dango trio still stand around relaxed and in their usual manner when they go to the artisanship delve and meet Skott,
but Dan Heng takes notice of Lingsha when she arrives, and he and Yanqing mentioned her specifically when discussing their worries.
Yanqing worrying so much about Jing Yuan got me right in the heart, he's such a good boy WEH
And when the four of them go out to the alchemy delve to meet Lingsha for tea, the pattern breaks. Suddenly Dan Heng is standing right up front, and even walks in and enters the scene before March 7th and the trailblazer to get to Lingsha before them. He stays a step in front of them the whole time, too.
And then when Dan Heng and the trailblazer have to go be interrogated by Feixiao! The same deal! Dan Heng walks in ahead of them and stays in front of them! Noticeably so! Enough that even Feixiao takes note and voices it!
Dan Heng is so so fiercely protective of his companions, and I love it, I adore hyper vigilance in the wake of trauma like this, I'm so excited to see what else he does in 2.5, I hope we either get to see him get fucked up or the trailblazer gets fucked up in his place, I wanna see them run through the meat grinder!!!
#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr dan heng#dan heng#dancae#danstelle#he loves them so much wehhhhhh#(I know I threw in the ship tags but I mean that love romantically or platonically. tag this either way as you please)#but anyway not to mention the whole cutscene part and Dan Heng promising he wouldn't let them die before him#I could have screamed when I read that oh my GOD#Dan Heng. baby. honey. sweetiepie.#I am going to squish him#I wanna see him get a little freaked out about being stuck in the Shackling Prison again heehee#I hope we get to see his old cell at some point#looking at all this though like yeah no wonder Dan Heng immediately doesn't like Moze haha#Moze is capable of the bigger picture and of being objective. Dan Heng loses that ability when his friends are in danger.#It's just not something they can see eye-to-eye on.#Dan Heng and even the trailblazer both immediately see it as being cold and uncaring.#Moze: *breathes*#Dan Heng: I'm no cactus expert but this guy's a prick.#I love them both I hope they butt heads again later fjkldjaklfd#dango trio#Nameless trio#trailblazer trio#caelus#stelle#hsr caelus#hsr stelle#march 7th
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yeppers
#decadentart#bloodborne#choir intelligencer edgar#<-i hope he explodes#idk what else to say about this#just look at it. preferably not for long . dont wanna die of frenzy man#this is wntirely concept art for a one off piece#<- for context#also the missing parts of the choir garb are intentional.#for the Classic Winter Lantern (tm) the doll’s cape is missing#also yea the resemblance to parasitized snails. on purpouse. idc if slugs dont have rhat. its for Fucked Up Scary points
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(Small, frivolous rant incoming, apologies)
One thing I wish the Destiny fandom did more of was dabble in the utter horror this universe holds, especially when it comes to portraying the vile atrocities committed by many of the cosmic level characters.
Destiny‘s T rating holds it back so much in my opinion (but it still manages to lay down excellent foundations for horror and more mature themes!!) and I really wish there was more fan works that explored the unimaginable tragedies that occur in lore!!
When you really dwell on the scale of many of the disasters that happen in lore, it really dawns on you just how sinister and monstrous many of the larger villains are. Antagonists like Eramis are much more grounded, certainly not saints though, but some of the antagonists we have encounter are truly odious in their behaviors, even if they are deluded into thinking what they are doing is correct (like the Osmium siblings ravaging whole star systems in pursuit of the sword).
For example, it’s no secret that I LOATHE the Witness like no other. This wicked entity has me fighting bile at the mere thought of it and I truly think the way it delivers cruelty with such a sense of compassion and righteousness to be the most stomach wrenching form of being baneful. I could not think of an entitlement more deplorable than the Witness‘ and it’s existence is a travesty that has caused irreparable harm that spans EONS.
Yet, in my experience, I never see much content that taps into the horrors experienced by those touched by the Witness and its pawns, such as the Noesis and humanity during the collapse. There are INCREDIBLE artistic and written works that tap into the psychological horrors of exos and the unethical hell Clovis was putting people through, but not as many on the more cosmic horrors from what I have seen!!
This may just be a me thing and the personal reasons why I want the Witness put under a hydraulic press speaking, but I often see plenty of depictions of the Witness being uncharacteristically soft and having deeper feelings towards its disciples, but works about its vengeful rage, simple mindedness, violation of the autonomy of others, and predatory grooming are quite barren.
I wish to see just how HEINOUS it is displayed in all its turpitude and how it leaves a festering rot on everything and everyone it touches. I love the Witness because it is so evil in it‘s actions and my heart SINGS any time I see people tap into the trauma it causes, especially for characters like Rhulk or Savathûn!!
There is so much room for exploring just how vast the Destiny universe is when you decenter perpetrators in stories and focus on the incomprehensible number of victims.
Destiny genuinely has a character running around with the title „The Final God of Pain“ haunting people and refusing to permanently die, but there is only so much a T rated game can do and I feel like Destiny enjoyers can go beyond what’s in game in such creative ways!! Just thinking of the fall of Torobatl has me going „Wow, I’m actually so sick to my stomach, I need to honor Caiatl and really capture the pain of such an event!“
The latest lore on the Qugu? My chest HURTS.
Some of the hive experimentations? The hive in general? Hell is not hot enough for what the Witness lead them into.
But you know what they say, be the change you want to see in the world! Create the content you want to enjoy and promote the content you do enjoy!! I wish to dabble into the darker areas of lore, and of course, promote Witness hatred any chance I get!! Hopefully I get more time to write about these things and really value the work the Destiny writers have put into portraying such strong feelings of loss time and time again!!
And also!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE read The Garden‘s Witness by Titanmaster_117 !!! ESPECIALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER, I COULD RANT ABOUT THIS BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF PROSE ALL DAY, IT GENUINELY MADE ME CRY!! PROMOTE THE CONTENT YOU ENJOY ALL DAY, EVERYDAY!!
But this is just something I’ve been thinking for some time now. This isn’t condemning anyone in the fandom or saying there is an issue, just a desire I would love to see (and hopefully fulfill if I ever get back into writing for Destiny!) If you guys have any recommendations for Destiny works that are horrific, focus on themes of loss and devastation, or hate on the Witness, feel free to mention them so other people can find them!!
Not enough Witness hate going around for my liking… this looks like a job for me.
#destiny 2#destiny#destiny the game#d2#the witness#destiny witness#destiny art#destiny fanart#destiny fanfiction#destiny eramis#eramis#nezarec destiny#nezarec#im just tagging whatever at this point#maybe it’s just me being from a group of people on the recieving end of a lot of the atrocities committed in destiny#witness haters where are you I NEED YOU#this is not to hate on anyone who makes any content in the destiny fandom btw!! I love you all so much#the destiny fandom can be so talented and creates AMAZING works#i wanna write and draw as good as some of the people in this fandom!! you guys are amazing!!!#if destiny was M and focused more on storytelling with some rpg elements I think I’d die happy#anyways make sure to blow up the witness with your mind whenever you can#i need that entity blown up into a million pieces NOW#destiny savathûn#savathûn#savathun#maybe one day I’ll write that fic from the perspective of someone who lost everything#someone who fought back against the Witness and was abused by it horribly
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he opens his mouth to say something
but stops
#sketch#dnd character#dnd art#session stuff#dandelion treehollow#jalester silvermane#lionmane#other people started to wake up#dande does this sometimes because of his issues with memory#taking a few moments to remember everything exactly as it is#things he wants to remember anyway#i don't seek out dnd romance but if one starts up organically i'm gonna feed the flame#it's the YEARNING#dande still thinks he's about to die at this point btw#but doesn't wanna bring it up anymore because it's a bummer
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Nico and Percy's dynamic through the series is eternally funny to me, because it's just. like.
Percy's having a constant mental struggle between his fatal flaw of loyalty with a promise he made to Bianca to protect Nico, versus his Big 3 kid desire to maim other Big 3 kids / Poseidon descendant urge to totally maim Nico specifically. He hates Nico so so much. He thinks Nico's annoying and weird at best, and creepy/sketchy when he's older. The only positive thoughts Percy has towards Nico are "He's Bianca's brother and Bianca was my friend and I owe her/He's Hazel's brother and Hazel is my friend and would kill me if I was mean to him," "He's a powerful asset and useful ally (if questionable)," and "He's kinda pathetic and I feel maybe a little bad about it." Percy has multiple occasions throughout the series where he strongly considers - and on one occasionally actually goes through with - throttling Nico.
Meanwhile, Nico is following around Percy like a lost puppy. He explicitly can never bring himself to even dislike anything about Percy no matter how hard he tries. He has a whole bit in BoO where he's mentally going "UGH he's so stupid BUT IT'S ENDEARING HOW DARE HE." He's totally smitten. He's making deals with his dad for Percy. He's making convoluted plans to help Percy stand a chance against Kronos. During the entirety of BoTL it's like he's playing tsundere - "I'm helping NOT PERCY SPECIFICALLY with this quest! Me helping Percy would be SILLY because I DEFINITELY HATE HIM." Then he proceeds to show up to Percy's birthday party to basically ask him on a weird date and spend the entire next book scrambling around trying to help him or protect him or impress him. And Percy could not give less of a shit.
Just. That dynamic is so funny to me. Percy is the founder of the Nico Protection Club in that he's the one they're all protecting Nico from and meanwhile Nico is throwing himself at Percy to the point where the literal god of gay love calls him out on it.
#pjo#percy jackson#nico di angelo#Percy shows up at CJ and squints at Nico like ''hm. why do i feel like i hate you? like i just wanna punch you in the face?''#and Nico just immediately goes ''huh no idea anyways i have to go-'' and jumps into Tartarus#but not before he gives Hazel essentially a detailed explanation of ''this is Percy i cant say much but please dont let him die <3''#and Nico's whole Tartarus trip was basically a whole ''im doing this so no one else has to''#only for Percy and Annabeth to fall in like one book later and Nico proceeds to spend the next book internally screaming about it#and then Cupid calls him out on it and the next book#Nico's just like ''at this point im hoping i keel over within the next week just so i can force this dumb crush to chill the fuck out''#Nico staring pointedly at Will: ''For my own sake i need to form another crush RIGHT NOW so i can finally get over Percy.''#''this has been so bad for my health''#Nico's crush on Percy is just too funny to me. horrible pick my guy. terrible job. love that for you. he could not be less interested.#Percy LITERALLY TRIES TO KILL NICO and ditch him in the underworld and Nico is somehow STILL like ''but i love him''#Percy basically chokes him. beats up his dad. tells him ''go get smited by your dad for me.'' and ditches him.#and Nico's opinions/crush on him DO NOT CHANGE#though also Nico's reaction to Percy beating up his dad + skeletons is SO funny. his jaw is on the floor. he's flustered about it.#he just witnessed Percy be incredibly hot and proceeded to go ''yea i'll do anything for this man. collect reinforcements of 3 gods? sure''#nico you absolute DISASTER with HORRIBLE TASTE. you can do better. raise your standards.#which tbh is funnier when you factor in sun and the star. Nico just wont stop crushing on guys who dislike him and everything he stands for
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Does anyone else hc that Nightmare can like, absorb his tentacles back into his body sometimes? Like the way Stitch does with his extra arms?
#UTDR#UTMV#Nightmare Sans#I just realised earlier I've been just kinda assuming this as fact and I don't know where it came from#cause I don't think it's canon and I can't think of seeing it anywhere else#So maybe it's just me idk#Anyway it's something I wanted to be more prevalent when I was doing the truce au comic (which if I ever work on again I'll probably restar#cause I didn't really know what I was doing and there's stuff I wanna amend)#But the idea was that at the start of their attempted truce the tentacles made Dream uncomfortable#(Not only because Nightmare often used them against him in battle but also it's something different about his brother from his#childhood memories and it was jarring to see his one constant be changed)#He didn't say anything about it but obviously Nightmare could feel it#So whenever Dream was around I would make a point of drawing him with the tentacles sucked in#It was his little unspoken effort to make the truce work. because he wanted it very badly but would rather die than admit it#(or try to figure out why)#But over the course of the truce Dream would notice and start encouraging him to have them out and be himself#Showing Nightmare a little acceptence because despite the differences that's still his brother#You ever write six times more in the tags than the actual post lol#These are the DVD extras of the post you have to go looking for these#Director's commentary of my silly little thoughts :3#Anyway thoughts?
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Logan but erik is also there
i need more fics that have this concept, i’ve read nearly all the ones i’ve found with this but i’m greedy so i require more
caliban just having to deal with three old ass mutants
since erik’s in his nineties i’m giving him a walker
and you know what HEARING LOSS
“Erik can you pass the salt?”
“WHAT??”
“the salt, Erik”
“WHAT??????”
he refuses to using hearing aids for some reason
him and charles sleep together but sometimes charles forgets who he is and freaks out about the stranger in his bed
erik has a spare bed in the ‘house’ when that happens
once laura comes along and they escape in the limo charles keeps going like “this reminds me of October 1962” the fact he even remembers that is crazy
when they’re in the hotel, laura shows erik her xmen comics while they watch movies until of course when the humans break in and charles has a seizure 🙁
i feel like erik would be the kind of old guy to go “back in my day!”
grandpa magneto naps
when they meet that family charles references erik as his husband
i cant tell whether i want this to be a fix-it or not
fuck it lets go down the angst path
x-24 still manages to kill charles and temporarily kidnap laura, magneto got his ass beat ☹️
beach divorce reference, erik cradling charles in his arms
they bury charles
erik refuses to leave the grave so logan and laura keep going
and that would be probably the last we see of erik
i’m gonna say he does die, maybe of old age he deserves a natural death like that
lets say someone sees an unconscious old man near a fresh grave and takes him to that hospital laura took logan where erik maybe passes in his sleep
boom kinda sad ending
and of course Logan ending for logan and laura
just imagine erik is also there or something ^^
#i wanna think of more silly old man antics but i cant run from the sadness of logan#erik watching charles doing drifts in his wheelchair#cherik go to the astral plane together and they look like their younger selves#gonna rewatch logan maybe#i actually lost the original version if this post i had to rewrite the whole thing#i love my brain it can recall what happens in bearly each xmen film#and also other films but thats not the point#erik was present at the westchester incident but he didn’t die because of the helmet#grumpy old men#grandpa magneto where are you#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#x men#logan xmen#logan howlett#laura kinney#xmcu#wish does not shut up#if you want a fix-it just imagine logan killed that main villain guy when he first showed up#so they never kidnapped caliban#caliban got to join the roadtrip#thank god they had a limo they can all fit
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theyre in my head. forever. take some scraps
#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc gangle#tadc jax#tadc zooble#tadc pomni#before anyone speaks up i am a lesbian pls dont point out the dyke part#i simply think he could be lesbian material. is he? no#i personally see him as very questioning and weird. too stunted with too many walls for romance#begrudgingly accepts friendships and maybe gets One close enough that gives him a weird. moment. realization#kicks his ass into gear that oops cant be driving them all away now or ill wanna kms#i wish i was capable of multishipping bc ribbun has some funny potential but man.#as is its too Not For Me. but gangle beating on jax for revenge is sooooo funny#also the fact ragatha and jax are the same person in different flavors? delightful.#both hiding themselves to such an extent that the one everyone knows isnt Real.#rags hiding herself through helping others while jax does it through pushing them away viciously and acting out#despicable. they care for each other in their own weird way.#she hates him but doesnt want him to die. she hates him but if something happened then she would be worried.#thanks for reading my rambling
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"Oh no, someone's attracted to the aesthetics of my -punk movement but doesn't know the praxis and history behind it like I do--"
OK. Tell them. Make it a teaching moment. Everyone who's in your movement learned the background from somewhere at some point, maybe this is that point for that person. Give them a jumping off point that they can dive into later.
"Oh but I shouldn't be responsible for teaching baby -punks about the history and the how-tos and--"
OK. Then don't tell them. You don't have to be responsible for teaching people with a budding interest in your group the ins and outs and how-tos. That's fair and valid! It can be a lot of work. Someone else will handle it
"But I'm annoyed that they would try to claim to be part of/be interested in my community without knowing all the details that I know after being in it for months/years/decades, they're dumb, they're posers, they're--"
OK. Then don't engage with them, if it's that bad. Maybe someone else will come around and tell them the history, maybe they'll pick it up on their own, maybe they'll just enjoy the fashion elements for awhile.
"But they shouldn't claim to be part of the -punk community if they don't know the--"
I feel like we have a few options here. People can either talk to them, share the history, share the values, share the praxis. Or they can just chase off anyone who even thinks about dipping a toe in their community, and then wonder why it's dying off later down the line.
I dunno, maybe I'm too naive and patient or whatever. But if people are entering your -punk spaces without knowing The Rundown of what you feel they need to know, maybe being nice about it and informing people instead of immediately assuming stupidity and malicious intent could help you make a new friend. Even the loudest voices in a space had to learn from somewhere, and not everyone has the luxury of being in the space as the History was Happening--whether it's an age thing or a not being aware of the space thing. Or maybe I just don't see what the big deal is behind people hating people who like the aesthetic of something and don't know the behind the scenes history about it yet.
Because I believe in the word 'yet.' No one comes into this world knowing everything about everything, and we're all constantly learning new things. I'm not gonna degrade someone and call them a poser for not knowing what I know. Because if it were me, interested in a scene but getting chased out and called a poser? I wouldn't hit the books and study up, I'd go 'that fuckin sucks, those people sucked' and then avoid anyone and anything having to do with it.
So chase people off and call them posers if you want. But if your community starts dwindling, don't be fucking shocked.
#out of queue#ani rambles#punks and posers#i cant even call this a 4am hot take because its 7pm but like#idk i keep seeing posts about like 'how DARE people think I bought my punk clothes how DARE they not know the how-tos and DIYs'#or 'ugh people only care about the ~aesthetics~ of my movement if you don't know shit get out of here' and like#maybe I'm just a shy ass introverted nerd whos scared of social rejection! but I avoid that shit like the plague#so if someone were to reject me based on not knowing about something I'd never even heard about? something i was JUST getting into?#there's a high chance I'd just scram and never look back. i don't wanna be the one who causes that emotion in someone else#granted this is coming from someone who STILL doesn't know how to make her own patches or worked up the courage to do direct action praxis#outside of offering neighbors to my tomatoes and trying to talk to people about what I'm passionate about#but still imo unless someone's a malicious intentional bad actor i dont see the point in scaring newbies off#thats how movements die imo#i know this is my solarpunk blog but its not a solarpunk specific thing#i think the main post that inspired this was about store-bought versus self-made spiked leather jackets#which honestly just feels petty to me but who knows.#might delete later
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Struggled with today's art but I have to draw Scar Daily or I implode basically- also Ren for @pup-pee because I have to practice drawing him and Martyn after all-
Also I think Non-dog hybrid Ren is cursed but like it's what we're working with here we're balling-
#WAaDW AU :>#fanart#scarian#desert duo#hermitshipping#trafficshipping#rendog#renthedog#<- I don't even feel like I should be using this tag cause he isn't a dog at this point LIKE SKVNDFd#also implied Treebark but you wouldn't know unless I explicitly said it from the images alone so yeah#something something Ren's Red Glasses are actually prescription because I refuse to draw that man without them#trafficblr#traffic smp#traffic series#traffic life#life series#life smp#life series smp#Madi's art :>#I have so much info on this AU guys it's not even funny but I won't start writing it til next year CAUSE I HAVE SOMETHING I NEED TO EDIT AN#POST BEFORE I START TRYING TO WRITE A MULTI-CHAPTER STORY THANKS#I'm shaking my AU so fast and the only people that know shit about it are Ru and Jay and I'm soooooo I wanna spill everything BUT CAN'T AAA#my curse as an artist is to draw the scenes in my head that I have planned for my story and just DIE IG#Maybe if I actually like write the chapter the first two doodles is from I'll clean up that drawing okay okay okay#OKAY I'M GONNA STOP RAMBLING NOW BECAUSE AT THIS POINT I'LL JUST SPILL ALL MY SECRETS AAAAAAAAAAAAA#AH SHIT I FORGOT THE OTHER TAGS#goodtimeswithscar#grian#gtws fanart#grian fanart
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i'll genuinely never stop thinking about codependency in rhack and how it's mostly coming from jack's side. both jack and rhys treat their relationship like rhys is the one who needs jack to not just survive but also thrive, but it's really the opposite and i think that REALLY adds to how much jack twists the narrative to make it seem like rhys can't do anything without him just to keep giving rhys a reason to keep him around and trust him
#plus the irony of it all#being someones obsession and then becoming so dependent on that someone to the point of YOU becoming obsessed with THEM#i just love it#yeah im rambling about rhack again#every once in a while i get reminded of what makes them so damn interesting and i turn into a sucker#their dynamic is just soooo good and theres so much stuff to look into and dissect#and like there are moments in the game where jack does mention that he needs rhys alive to survive himself outloud#but its always when rhys is actively in danger#other than that its 'ill have your back' and 'ill get you whatever you want'#but honestly rhys does a pretty good job of keeping himself alive#and he does have fiona and co with him too who (as much as jack doesnt wanna believe it) have rhys' back too#i just think jack trying to isolate rhys from them to reel him in is so interesting and fucked up and i love it sm#and of course i cant make a rhack ramble post without mentioning the murder-suicide thing HAKGHD someone has to keep talking abt that#bc thats really the moment that cemented to me how personal jacks feelings towards rhys were#where jack reaches the point of rather wanting to die than let rhys walk away from him alive#I JUST GJKHKDJG not even in a romantic way. jack just needs rhys painfully much#it just gets 10 times spicier when you slap some romance in there too#rhack#txt#this is just a long winded way of saying jack is really clingy in a very ugly and fucked up way#and i love that abt him <3 genuinely it might be my favorite part of his character
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“Arthur can totally dress himself he’s just spoiled” why are you giving him that much credit
#no but seriously#this bitch has every symptom#being able to consistently dress independently would genuinely be a miricle at this point#he has constant meltdowns easily manipulated anger issues#admits that Merlin is his ONE AND ONLY FREIND#so that’s definitely a social deficit if I’ve ever seen one#he’s dumb as a tone of bricks and I can say that bc I am also#and noble insest WAS THE NORM.#you wanna know why king George lost amercia?#HIS BRAIN WAS FUCKED UP. HIS GENES WERE FUXKED UP#but like#anyways#key word constantly dressings himself#bc every disabled person will tell you that abilities are such a spectrum#back when I couldn’t dress myself it fluxuated wether I could or couldn’t and to what degree until i eventually couldn’t do it at all#also arthur can technically do it#but rare times and even when he does it’s shit#sometimes doing a task is technically possible but it takes 25 years off your life#bc of stress and just. god it’s so complicated and overwhelming#and even if you DO it it’s not even worth it#bc it’s shit#I will die on this hill btw#from my own little galaxy world#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin bbc
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