#at least thats my headcanon and why he doesnt speak

[lubrumalis]

konig headcanons! (realistic)

tw: nsfw

all of these are realistic hc! dont expect a normal konig

hes NOT a shy awkward pushover, just because he has social anxiety??? we can see through his voice lines hes a very cocky person and speaks rather agressively

“lets be honest, its better off in my hands.”

i hc that just because konig has social anxiety, he doesn’t express this through bring soft and shy, he expresses it through his bluntness

konig wanted to be a sniper but did not because he couldn’t stand still, has social anxiety, i hc he has some form of adhd

his very cocky and blunt shouting isn’t because hes mean, but he just doesnt wanna be seen as that bullied kid he once was

hes doesnt have horrible EQ, but the kind of guy to be incredibly unfiltered

also, this guy was literally assigned as a human battering ram, you think hes all soft and sweet???😅😅😅

no he won’t get angry or cry if his mask is taken off. just annoyed.

its not actually canon that konig is a colonel (correct me if im wrong, i couldnt find anything on the official wiki) but lets assume hes one anyway

even if he isnt, gets paid well. really well.

private military companies that deploy soldiers in areas of active conflict can pay up to hundreds of thousands for one soldier

considering konigs age (late 30s at least) and skills, probably 400-500k a year.

chose to join the military because he had an obsession with tanks and guns as a kid

a lot of hc’s say hes 6’10. i disagree, simply based off of chances and the fact thats wayyyy too tall for the military

but he was described as a mountain, so id say his height is around 6’5-6’8

very very intimidating. hes tall big and has the mask of an executioner in the 15th century. who wouldn’t be scared?

definitely will say some random german word in a situation where no one else there knows german. he doesn’t give a damn lol

hates americans (thinks theyre all obese, mannerless, and bad at geography)

brings up the most random topics. again i really think konig has adhd.

konig was not good at school and hated it, mainly due to the anxiety and how he couldn’t pay attention

also why he chose the path of a soldier

drinks lots of beer, high alcohol tolerance, this guys a true european.

loves austrian or german food. loves schnitzel and pies.

konigs breakfast is literally sausages, toast, eggs, and sometimes beer

BIG APPETITE. he could eat for 3 people.

a little insecure about his appearance, not confident in his looks :( also why he hid his face

but as he grew older he uses the mask for actual purposes of concealing his identity, he is a special ops soldier after all

kind of a cheapskate. he chose to hide his face with what, polyester? chose a piece of cloth over everything else.

has very conservative beliefs. not to the point where he hates abortion and votes far right, konig is just a little confused about some things certain liberals believe in

pretty political person lmao

not enough info to conclude whether or not konig was abused as a kid tbh

he was definitely miserable for a period in his life. hes in the military living a monotone life, barely any contact with others, and constantly living in fear he’d die

i dont think hes as traumatized as ghost tho🙂🙂

konig appreciates his dna and how it makes him big and tall, but sometimes gets incredibly annoyed at it

mainly because well, he got bullied for itas a kid

because he specializes in hostage rescue a lot of hostages (especially kids) are scared of him and refuse to leave the area with him

takes a lot of convincing 🥲🥲

has a lot of intrusive thoughts

cannot use social media properly

also texts like an old grandpa. uses 😂 and 🤣 unironically.

“Can we have burgers 🍔 tonight🌃?”

probably uses a blackberry or reallyyyyy old iphone

relationship hcs:

konigs voice actor (jim boeven) stated in a livestream that konigs wife would ideally be a mix between maria pedraza (actress) and rachael from blade runner (character from movie).

both are 170cm ish and brunettes

i can actually see that—konig is massive and he probably prefers someone on the tall side

first thing you did that led to your relationship with him? you tolerated him that is. listened to him ranting😃

i can see him with a civilian or someone whos in the military tbh

finds you pretty at first

enjoys bickering, he needs someone to simulate his mind

you know those stories where his s/o is 5’2, clingy, soft af, and neeeeeeeds konig? haha you won’t be getting that from me.

unlike ghost, who really takes his time to get to know someone and opens up slowly, scared to have his trust broken again

konig charges in like the human battering ram he is😁

if he has a feeling you’re trustworthy you are trustworthy.

horrible at flirting. he doesn’t know how to talk to women smoothly

needs someone equally as weird and funny

s/o needs to be someone with very firm boundaries and can stand their ground, i think konigs a really stubborn person, so for a healthy relationship to work, s/o can’t be the generic bimbo

konig wears the pants in the relationship

doesn’t let you pay. he has a enough money and believes men should always pay

(im sorry to break your delusions) konig does not strike to me as someone who likes a docile homebody. thats ghost (if you remove the word docile).

he doesn’t like extremely dominant partners either

imagine someone who is a listener, accepting yet blunt, shares his quirks, and has a very elegant feel to them

also someone very independent

also gonna get killed for this but konig would realistically not go for a girl in her early twenties. he prefers elegance and sophistication over being cute and jumpy

hates one night stands.

values relationships more than you think. he can come off as strong at first, but hes trying his best

ecstatic when you tell him you wanna learn german (hes not a good teacher)

doesn’t like play fighting, he thinks he’s gonna accidentally hurt you

admires you a lot. he knows hes not the best looking person and doesn’t understand the makeup skincare dress up thing.

isn’t paranoid, but definitely doesn’t say he has an s/o

if you ever get mad at him, konig will tighten all jars in the kitchen so you have to ask him for help :)

extremely unfiltered. he hates your cooking? he will say it. that dress looks better than the other? he will say it.

[enchantedsword]

okay im going to try and do as many headcanons/ideas i have for this au(now named stone twin au because i cant think of anything else and im bad with being original obviously) most of these are about wukong since hes the one i think about constantly but i guess i have to start somewhere(also i have a few of my headcanons in here that dont just pertain to this au plus a few things from jttw but i didnt feel the need to have them on a separate post), this is mostly just about sunny's(wukong) relationships with others, not everyone but the ones i can think of for now. i also finally figured out how to do read more.

obviously wukong(sunny) would be the more monkey like of the two, hes about a few inches shorter then mk, he's very clingy, loved to cling to pigsys back growing up and still occasionally does especially when not feeling well, also clings to tang and mk and occasionally mei, when the twins were first found he couldnt speak human(he understood it just fine the same way any other toddler would) and while mk couldnt speak monkey he could understand it and played translator until they taught him how to speak human, he still slips into monkey speach when hes really sick or upset/distressed, he prefers it when others play with/style his hair for him(the whole monkey socialization), loves climbing and being in high places and has very high energy when his health isnt acting up, this has caused a few heart attacks

loves both his dads but is closer to tang(we know why even if he himself cant remember) loves to spend time with him learning new things, always begs for stories of tripitaka and what he can of macaque. tang is the one that taught the twins the basics of what was needed for school, and actually does a lot of sunnys lessons himself when hes to sick to go to school, i dont really have a set job in mind for tang yet but i was thinking a historian of some sort that can work from home especially since he has a sick child. its also because of tang that sunny as such a love of reading and learning

with pigsy he's still pretty close, mk being the one closest to him, but hes still loves spending time with him. sunnys not very good at cooking, but he loves clinging to pigsys back and watching while he cooks(as said above its something he never grew out of), pigsy has made sure that sunny can make the foods he actually can eat though. sunny also shares pigsys love of singing and they will have mini concerts when no ones watching.

mk and sunny are very close and slightly co dependent, mk has a lot of anxiety about leaving sunny alone for long periods, sunny has a lot of guilt about this and self blame for mk not having many friends outside of mei and himself, and while hes just as codependent as mk he does make an effort to encourage mk to go out without him. it used to be worse when they were younger, but they both started going to therapy around 10 at sandys suggestion, they still struggle with it but they do have lives and hobbies outside of each other. obviously since sunny doesnt have his memories he cant exactly teach mk how to use the staff and powers, his advice is more of the sibling "well remember when you tried *random thing thats similar to current situation* when we were kids just try that" sunny is the one that eventually pushes mk to try and find an actual teacher at least to teach him to fight properly.

both twins are very talented artists(a canon fact that i just cant get rid of), like i said sunny loves singing and acting/performing but he does have stage fright bad enough to prevent him from doing so outside of his small group of friends/family(this stems from the trauma that always seemed to happen in front of large crowds in jttw poor baby getting affected by everything even if he cant remember). sunny is also the one that gets the better grades of the two despite missing way more school. due to not being able to run off his energy a lot he channels it into his studies and art and writing, he wants to eventually become a professional artist.

mei is obviously just as close to sunny as she is to mk, both of them are chaos and adrenaline junkies, shes his partner in crime when it comes to pranks, she makes sure that he's not alone even on days he doesnt feel well enough to get out bed or hes in the hospital. they both love cute things, and if mei gets a dress she doesnt want she gives them to sunny, especially if its pink(he has a lot of them). she keeps sunny up to date on all the shenanigans that happen while hes in the hospital, including the stuff mk wont say in fear of worrying him.

sandy is the one sunny goes to when he's feeling suffocated and overwhelmed by his familys hovering and overprotectiveness, he finds him to be a very comforting presence and hes a good listener for whatevers bothering him. sunny also likes to help train the therapy cats.

sunny does have a mean streak, especially when its something negative being said about his friends/family, uses his pranks to get back at whoever wronged him, since he's to weak for a physical fight(hes tried once it didnt end badly only because the other person was to shocked to really retaliate sunny did end up breaking the kids nose and his own wrist). the pranks themselves are never cruel or outright harmful just enough to make the person think twice about doing it again

PIF actually manages to figure out who sunny is pretty early on having seen the small family out and about one day, she does assume wukong has reincarnated into a new life, and as much as shes upset with him over what happened with DBK thats still her husbands little brother and one of the ones that help her son, so she leaves them be, looking in from time to time

for DBK he's still got some lingering resentment for being trapped for 500 years. his first thought on seeing sunny is that wukong is just faking and toying with him, his wife does inform him that that is not the case. after that he cant figure out if he's happy about this or not. on one hand he gets to see sunny be the happy carefree person that wukong used to be though he's upset that it's at the cost of his health, but on the other hand he's lost his little brother and never got to make up. sunny does feel oddly drawn to DBK though hes not sure why but he deems him as immediately safe(much to the concern of everyone else)

red son was obviously very young the last time he saw wukong, so he has no idea who sunny really is, after the initial being enemies thing and getting a few good pranks in on him, they actually get a long well, both being sassy and sarcastic enough to keep up with each other(everyone else is happy that sunny has a new friend even if that friend is kinda of an asshole). red son grew up to hearing stories about wukong both good and bad so he does have some complicated feelings about him, that does carry over to sunny once hes told hes wukongs reincarnation and further complicated when it finally comes to light that he is actually a sealed wukong, in the end red son decides that sunny is sunny and still his friend even knowing who he actually his.

the whole macaque situation goes mostly as canon except macaque thinks sunny is just playing around and pretending not to know anything. mk meets macaque the day before sunny is released from the hospital, he follows mk to the hospital to pick him up which is the first time he sees sunny. the fight goes mostly the same but not, in the fact wukong isnt there to fight him and protect mk, but sunny is basically used as a hostage and accused of playing pretend, its sunny being in danger that helps mk get the powers macaque took back. sunny doesnt really know how to feel about the situation at all, hes had a crush on macaque since he was a kid and that same person tried to kill both him and his brother and claims hes someone that hes not. continues to antagonize his friends and claim he's wukong, and a large part of him still does have feelings for macaque even after all that. hes got a lot of complicated feelsing about it but he is still incredibly pissed that macaque tried to kill his brother and tried to use him to do so. macaque is in for a world of hurt when it comes to the eventual pranks. macaque for a while refuses to believe that sunny isnt pretending, since the alternative is accepting the wukong reincarnated and isnt coming back. overall its very complicated and the family disapproves.

as for sunnys powers and memories and immortalies, they are all under different types of seals and of those there are many keeping them all wrapped up tight. like he could unlock one or two powers but his immortalies and memories seals would be uneffected and vice versa. he does unlock 2 powers during the whole spider queen thing that being his strength and his cloud, however he can't use them for very long without exhausting himself. DBK was the first to notice that sunny had powers during their imprisonment with spider queen, he was able to trigger sunny into activating them which got them free. though DBK did get punched for his efforts, sunny broke his wrist again and immediately passed out, DBK getting them the rest of the way out and bringing sunny to his family

[y1p-y4p]

uhhhhh some ancient hero headcanons of mine because hes melting my brain

In no order, this is just me writing to the void

Also this was slapped together late in the evening, sorry for any spelling mistakes im barely keeping my eyes open

Not well liked by Hyrules people, hylian or not. This has lead to unfortunately common uncomfortable interactions. Its because a majoroty of Hyrules citizens were expecting a pretty blonde swordsman, not even considering the chosen one could be anything else, and were definitly.. surprised to see him as the chosen one

I feel like he would be slightly more expressive, on account of his more beast-like features

however he does hide/significantly tone down his expressiveness, its more of an unconcious thing due to people generally treating him wiith hostility or at least very visible caution, so he returns to favour (not outright hostile though, he doesnt want to ruin the little trust people have in him, hes not petty enough for that)

Really interested in Hyrules cultures and places! He loves learning about the different races, their customs, the lands history ect.

As you may have guessed by the previous HC, hes not Hyrulian. Im still working on where hes from and what he even is

You know that specific “mrp” sound cats make when you surprise them or when they just generally turn towards something? Yeah he does that.

He has whiskers on his snout and eyebrows that work similarly to a cats, all be it to a more weaker degree

The lighter markings are natural but he does use body paint/makeup/whatever for minor touch ups, just to make them look more impressive and symetrical (its a normal practice where hes from)

His hearing and sense of smell is far better than the average persons

His teeth are black, not because he doesnt take care of himself, but because of similar reasoning to why sea lions have black teeth (bacteria thats naturally there)

He is capable of speech and of speaking hyrulian. Hes basically fluent and either has an accent or struggles to pronounce some things which gives him away

Despite his many cat-like qualities (whiskers, flexibility, even similar body movements) he also shares many similarities with canines. A majority of the sounds he can make are more akin to canine vocalizations than anything a feline could produce

All i can think of for now, plus i dont want to wrote an entire novel in one post (dont get me STARTED on him unless you have several years of your life to spare) so thats all im writing for now

I love him ughgfggffggghhhhhh

[kyleiskoool]

massive rod family/heritage headcanon dump:

okay so i kind-of feel like rod is french canadian. i really love making people french canadian gang... so yeah rod can speak french pretty fluently. also the canadian part purely bc of mgwlic. so it makes sense for him to say that he had a girlfriend in canada. (because rod isnt dumb, he wouldve thought it out a little bit guys) but yeah i loveeee making it so people can speak french.

okay but dont get me wrong, french is a romantic language but when rod speaks it he is the least romantic peraon ever. he speaks really direct bc all of the times he spoke french it was yelling at his parents (just wait ill expand on it). but when he gets mad he starts spouting shit off in french (nicky has picked up a few new phrases). but yeah he spoke french from birth and learnt english a bit at home and went to an english speaking school.

parental wise? i love rod so he's getting the lesbian mum treatment (me applying the fact my mum left- dw half of this isnt what happened in my life).

okay so rod grew up in a right winged family (thats why hes republican) in french canada. he has an older brother (but he is ALOT older like 11yrs older so he never rly knew her) and mum and dad. and then other relatives that r irrelevant. everything was pretty typical. he never really spoke to his brother but he was at christmas and stuff.

trauma time 😜

rods mum up and left at like 9 years old to go live with a lesbian lover. rods dad is PISSED bc theyre like highly conservative. even though he was homophobic before this CEMENTS that ideology in his mind. he doubles down and drills it into rods head that being gay is bad and he is nothing if he was gay. he never saw his mother after she left.

this is why he is so scared to come out. hes scared that everyone thinks this way and theyre all out to get him and abandon him. so he also doubts it when he feels it because he doesnt want to be bad. but yeah :( thats why he bonded with nicky so much because he secretly thought nicky was rly brave for supporting the lgbtq but he was still scared that somehow his dad would find out.

this goes into more that rods dad refused to let him do anything 'feminine'. he trued to get rod to play a sport but he couldn't for the life of him so he took up an instrument (the clarinet) instead. he always wanted to do the musical and sing, but once again, it wasnt seen as 'manly' enough. thats why he loves going to shows and is so wowed when be sees nicky in shows.

his brother definitely started talking to him a bit more when rod was in college. rod reached out first asking for advice. his brother pretty much said 'study, dont get kept up in emotional things and find a roommate with the same interests as you'. after that, his brother kept tabs on him as he moved on with life. he tries to help princeton in the same way his brother helped him.

his brother heard about his mum and didnt really care. he was definitely never that homophobic or conservative (thats why he moved out so quickly) so he never really cared about his mum being lesbian.

okay wait im just gonna do this here. this is a yap abt how rod and nicky became friends bc like why not.

okay so rod was majoring business or something i cant be fucked to care. anyways, he usually studied in the library or the caf at night. and he saw alot of faces but nickys just stood out to him for some reason. he eventually figured out he was a theatre major and that his name was an n name. he keeps mentioning this guy to his business major friends and they have no clue who he is. they try to ask around too and find little info except for his name (nicky) and the fact he was in the last musical

anyways, as rod really loves theatre, he usually goes to the theatreclubs shows if he has any spare money. he buys a ticket to a show and notices that THAT GUY that he always sees around is the LEAD. rod has to do a double take and in the intermission he buys a program. rod spends the rest of the show just looking at him and just fawning over his singing and acting.

the show finishes and mostly everyone leaves. rod sticks around, looking at his headshot just making sure that he knows what guy it is. nicky ends up coming out, smiling but ultimately looking tired. rod doesnt see anyone approach him and nicky is streamlining it to the door. rod ends up running over and just complimenting his performance. nicky lights up so much and thanks him over and over.

rod mentions that he's seen him around. nicky perks up and says that he thinks one of his friends is in his class. he goes 'youre ryan.. right?' and rod just laughs and goes 'haha, no im rod' and nicky is like 'YEP THATS RIGHT! i was so close'. rod just smiles and is like 'ill see you around, you got any more shows?' nicky tells him they have like 3 more shows and rod asks if he's got any classes. nicky says that he doesnt but he has a test the next day and needs to study. rod suggests that they study together because he also has a test soon.

nicky agrees and they plan on seeing each other the next day. and their friendship is born!

anyways, nicky is so flustered bc the guy he lowkey had a hallway crush on had invited him to study and rod was like 'YAYYAYAYAYYAYAYA I TALKED TO THE GUY I WANTED TO BE FRIENDS WITH'

okay guys thats the end of a very VERY big yap. i hope you guys enjoyed my stupid headcanon rant about rod because i have very big feelings about this. i very much want to write a oneshot about college rodnicky. (theatrekid nicky is my number one headcanon) !!! also desperate want to draw rods family !!!

okay gang leave a #thumbs up and subscribe if you enjoyed the video. see you in the next one!

[noctupede]

I wanted to make a longer post on the specific symptoms of C-ptsd, OCD and autism traits that I feel iceland would have, so here that post is

If anyone wonders why these three, these are ones I have myself, and feel they do make historical sense for him(except ASD, but thats a personal headcanon). There are many different ways these disorders show up in people; i am no expert. But these are based on my own experiences ˆ𐃷ˆ

Ocd:

-Iceland experiences compulsions and obsessions, most often in the form of religious intrusive thoughts, and compulsions such as needing to do a quick prayer in the belief something bad will happen if he doesnt

-Norway and Denmark have grown quite used to Ice's need to check if doors are locked multiple times

-he most frequently has intrusive thoughts about people leaving him, and needing to do compulsions that seem completely unrelated

C-ptsd:

-Ice can sleep like a rock most nights, but in bad nights he will struggle to fall asleep, often stressed out of his mind for no apparent reason, this will manifest in one of two ways: lashing out or becoming fully distressed.

-most often this is triggered by a persistent feeling of loneliness, he can manage on his own but will become noticeably more stressed, more agitated and a lack of self care: he spends most of his time with norway or Denmark for this reason

-he is generally distrustful of other people, which is how his anxiety manifests itself. Which he can struggle with because he does enjoy being around others, this distrustfulness makes it difficult for him to trust others

Autism spectrum disorder:

Probably the least.. heavy in terms of trauma. He is quite blunt when need be, and is incapable of fully reading a room.

-I have mentioned passively that I headcanon him to have a "blunted affect" which means his emotional output is blunted, he struggles with showing emotions through his facial expressions, he could be very happy or content and still have a monotonous facial expression

-he has a strict routine and specific foods that he likes, but is in general a very sensory seeking person. He enjoys going outside and doing outdoorsy stuff like certain sports or hikes. However he does not like a lot of noise or being surrounded by people

-does not make eye contact when speaking or he makes too much eye contact, there's no in between.

-when frustrated or overwhelmed he also has a tendency to get agitated rather than sad or upset. He will come off as snappy, impatient or irritated when he is overwhelmed(or behind on schedule) which the nordics are used to

-I like to think that iceland is very fond of learning about fish or talking about fishing, as he's been doing it for a very long time he knows a lot about it.

-a bit of a picky eater to be honest, this guy likes fish, sheep and vegetables, anything else is stuff he has to force himself to try

[asmogorna]

Sorry to send another ask so soon (and idk if someones asked this already) but if you have any headcanons for Jon I'd love to hear them!

OK SO im really sorry it took me THIS long to get to this i quite literally.. forgot i had smth in my inbox woopsies. the reason i remembered is cause mootie posted some Spine hcs and i was like "woah"

alsooo im not good at putting my thoughts onto "paper" especially in english so you will have to excuse me

anywho my jon headcanons some sad some random /ref

First of all i think that his relationship with Peter Walter I would be far from close. he would be seen as the type of child who's both "too much mess to take care of" and "strong enough to take care of himself" if that makes sense. Peter did love him as his creation but would openly admit that he's not his proudest one, meanwhile Jon wouldn't feel much connection at all. he sympathized with his creator but only in a way he would with any other human being, there was more gratitude than love

Jon struggles with constant malfunctions and his mechanisms are a mess (partially because he gets himself in trouble all the time), so at one point Peter would get tired of fixing him so frequently, and tell him that he can just "walk some things off". That thought stuck to the bot and he would think of all of his malfunctions as slight inconveniences, i mean, he can still perform so why pay attention to the constant neck pain or powering up struggles ? it just became a habit and he kind of forgot that things like that shouldn't be ignored

After a long while when Peter Walter VI grew up enough to start learning more about how automatons work, Jon would be used as a "lab rat" (not really but its just what he himself called it) for young VI to practice fixing mechanisms. thats pretty much when he heard "Wait this cant be right" about his messed up physical state for the first time in a long while. little Peter didnt get to fix all of the things that were wrong with Jon's body, but he did manage to take care of some of them, which almost surprised Jon with how nice it felt to not hear pieces of broken gears rattle in his head every time he moved (who wouldve thunk)

ok now to more lighthearted stuff !!

Jon actually has a very strong bond with Sam ! He loves watching the mustached man work and sometimes follows him around, just enjoying his company. At first Sam thought that the tone-gold automaton was creepy and uncanny, but grew attached to him and his stupidity (/lh). i also think that Sam would be one of the few Walter workers who dont baby the Jon and actually treat him like they would treat any other robot :3

Also Jon just loves his robot family endlessly. shocker !! im not sure how explain it but i think hes the only one to look at other Walter automatons and go "bro i love them so much" at all times. in his head at least. obviously he teases them and argues with them but he wont think twice before accepting a hug from his siblings (except for Upgrade theyre rivals /j)

Speaking of Upgrade !! They feel the most sibling-ish to me (aside from Rabbit & The Spine) because they constantly poke fun at each other yet they still are willing to give each other help and comfort when needed. She once had to carry him all the way back to the Walter manor because they forgot to take some extra cans of crystal pepsi

Also Upgrade got in an accident once which caused her to have a fractured face for a couple of days, and Jon was there the entire time to comfort her and constantly tell her that shes still very pretty

Unlike with other robots, the food that Jon eats doesnt just fall through his uncovered jaw/run into his boiler or anything like this, instead it just. disappears. once he closes his mouth the food just vanishes into the unknown, yet Jon claims that he enjoys the process of "eating" (nobody knows how it works)

LITTLE GIRLS THAT GO TO SPG SHOWS LOVE HIM !! once the band finishes performing, he constantly gets pulled away by a small giggling pink-ish blob to join their tea party or hula hooping contest. thats why he has quite a knowledge on "girly" themes and educates other automatons on the matter

THATS IT FOR NOW TY FOR READING :3

[swiftfootedachilles]

hiiii achilles!!!!!!! how are you today? i miss your gallavich hot takes so do you have something in mind? have a good day 🌷

well apparently my big gallavich hot take is them having a jewish wedding 😭

okay. hmmm, actual unpopular hot takes? i gotchu

i want more intersex headcanons (that are well-researched and not fetishizing intersex people!). i want more t4t mlm gallavich. and i DEFINITELY want more t4t trans!mickey nonbinary!ian gallavich. because amab people are just as transgender as anyone else even if they dont take hormones or drastically change their appearance or change their name. nonbinary people arent women lite and men lite, theyre nonbinary. and i think nonbinary!ian is so slay

ian does not enjoy bottoming. even when he consented to doing it with trevor, he didnt actually like it. he simply tolerated it

when staying with the gallaghers, ian and mickey are very brazen about their sex life and dont try to stay quiet or even close their door sometimes, BUT they wont fuck in common areas like the kitchen and living room unless it was on the couch and they were 1000% sure there was NO chance of any of the kids walking in on them. they wouldnt traumatize liam or franny like that (stfu s5 doesnt count bc they knew liam was too young to have memories yet 😭 (speaking of, why does nobody ever talk about the fact that liam was 2 years old for like 3 whole years 😭😭))

their "security" business as it is in the finale isnt very sustainable. it literally started as money laundering, and ian didnt know. i think he eventually finds out by accident thru kev or vee what mickeys original "security business" plan was, and he gets super pissed. but i think they could very easily turn it into a legal business. we see them starting to do that, by working with real dispensaries instead of the shady illegal one kev and vee have in the bar. nevertheless, id like to read more future fics where they grow or adapt the business, and even move on to a new business altogether! theyre not exactly the career-having type. i think change over time actually helps stabilize them

THEY NEED TO PAINT THAT FUCKING AMBULANCE. ITS STOLEN. WHY DONT THEY EVER PAINT IT ALL BLACK OR SOMETHING?? WHERE DID THEY GET THE NEW PLATES. DID THEY EVEN CHANGE THE PLATES?? the s4 writers would never let a scam have so many plot holes 😔 they wouldve SHOWED us mickey and his brothers getting new plates for the truck

ian gets a tattoo for mickey. youre telling me that after the surprise anniversary party, you think ian WOULDNT get mickey somehow immortalized on his body? WRONG. he definitely does. i dont think its his name over his heart. maybe something small on his wrist? or M on his ring finger💜 thats a fav headcanon of mine

they dont start a family until close to 40. the longer theyre married, the more they realize they have to catch up on. learning to live together long-term, paying off debts and bills, moving, vacations, reconnecting with old friends and family, being there for liam where theu couldnt for their other siblings when they were liam's age, watching their nieces and nephews often to gain more caretaking and parenting skills, medical issues, family emergencies. theres just a lot that takes up their time, and they become very comfortable being two before they ever try to become three

they nonseriously say shit like "i want a divorce" but they NEVER mean it. even when one says it as a joke or like in s11e3, the other will ask "did you really mean that? do you really want a divorce? do you think we'll ever get one?" and they end up having a rare super serious heart-to-heart about it. about what they think the future might hold - or at least, what they want it to hold. the longer they are with each other the more stable their relationship becomes. bickering is less common, big fights are less explosive and violent, and they learn to become comfortable with silence

[bonnieura]

I think my favorite thing in the world is connecting/referencing historical figures for clone characters. i dont think i am Being clear right now. like get this: referencing the historical figure the clone was cloned from?? I love that so much. making the little connections between them and the person they were based off. as much as i love the idea of the clones being their own person n shit in the end (and in the lore imo) they ARE a clone . They have their DNA and they share almost the same attributes . like what do you MEAN jfk doesnt have blue eyes????? Like if the guy he was based off, the president, had blue eyes he has a right to have them too. i think thats the only headcanon ive ever had for a character and i dont even THINK its a headcanon because like? why wouldnt jfk have blue eyes did they fuck up the dna or something?? labrat malfunction?? i think the reason why they dont appear in the show is because of the show's style. and with this logic that means abe has blue eyes too, and im not just talking about eyes im speaking for every single other attribute the h!figure had [im just using eye colours as an example]

i also like to believe this when it comes to facial features too. because again theyre clones of the dna so likeeeeee why wouldnt they look exact! if not exact then at least considerably similar. that's just my opinion though. like you cant tell me this isnt what any of the characters look like

okay KIDDING! but like i do enjoy and completely support the idea of the characters at least showing some great resemblance to the people they were cloned from . like thats just a must. and honestly i really love little references OUTSIDE their appearance, like secondary personality traits or something. parts of their childhood (which is honestly not a wide field of interpretation because.. 16 still IS childhood at least compared to the real ages of the historical figures so theres not a lot of room for improvising i suppose) or even references to their later life? I find that so cool. i really enjoy it whenever i see someone's interpretation of a clone containing little neat trivia that directly corresponds to their clone father. I am such a sucker for u.s history you do NOT know how HAPPY it makes me see to see people actually talk about like abraham lincoln or something or lem billings when referring to whether or not jfk (clone high) was/is bisexual or not ((((and ive seen people theorize his sexuality based off john f kennedy's sexuality which is a whoooole other can of worms)))))))) like i just get so excited because That Means I Can Add A Lot More Trivia And Fun Facts For Them And I Like That . I Like being Historically Accurate and adding Fun References for those who Do Know. I would write more but im tired like shiiiiiiit ok god goodbye

[triptychofvoids]

I love your medic headcanons so much I need to hold you (and him) so gently!! If you don't mind, could you share more headcanons for him if you have any?

thank you!! i have so many things i could say about him that its sort of ridiculous and if i were to talk about every one of my headcanons then we would be here all month but yes, i will be happy to share a couple more. if anyone wants something more specific theyll have to ask for it though x]€

going under the cut again just in case it gets long <<

ill get the obvious one out of the way first because i keep saying it but this guy is definitely trans. you have to trust me because im always right and i just know. hes gender

medic is definitely a caffeine addict, this guy loves coffee and will drink it at any given opportunity. he likes tea as well but nothing is as satisfying as coffee. the way it smells is great, tastes great and highly customizable, excellent to have with chocolate or pastries, and he likes the way it makes him feel. hes trying to figure out why he can down a whole pot of coffee and still fall asleep, yet his body does seem to have some sort of a reaction to it? results pending

speaking of food and drinks, hes got a bit of a sweet tooth. he loves sugar (in moderation of course, but you wont catch him turning down a slice of cake every now and then). however he doesnt like anything TOO sweet. certain kinds of frosting or desserts are just ridiculously sugary and paired with his sensory issues some sweets would be a little unbearable. i think one time sniper offered him some fairy bread and he felt nauseous. other than that though, generally speaking he loves various pastries and candies and especially chocolate. hed be a big fan of the cherry + chocolate combination and, again, anything involving coffee.

he gets bored super easily. medic likes to have his whole day planned out and always needs to be doing something, even if its something small, otherwise hes pretty convinced he might actually genuinely die of boredom. you cant leave him alone without an Activity for too long or hes going to start thinking about killing people (he thinks about killing people a lot actually.... but thats besdies the point).

last one, just because i could genuinely keep going for hours but i have to stop somewhere, he loves going on long walks out in the middle of nowhere. he invites the other mercs to come with him from time to time but theyve all learned by now that when he says hes taking 'a short walk' he really means that they wont be back at base for at least another hour or two minimum. he likes keeping track of the best paths, bird watching, and collecting cool things he finds along the way

[kaleidoscopic-quiddity]

'todoroki doesnt even want to be a hero, thats just something endeavor forced him into/pushed onto him'

did??? we all??? watch??? the same show????

todoroki openly antagonises Endeavor, to his face, numerous times 

even as a literal toddler he would stand up to endeavor, yelling at him to not hurt rei, and after rei pours the hot water on his face, todoroki told endeavor ‘it’s your fault she hurt me’ 

he slaps his hand away after the provisional licence remedial training, and in the endeavor agency arc he tells him to ‘stop acting like my dad in front of my friends’ 

just in general his manner of speaking to Endeavor is very disrespectful and outwardly aggressive in japanese

basically, hes not afraid of pissng off his dad, at all, even in public

so if todoroki truly didnt want to be a hero, what gives you the impression that he wouldnt just straight up refuse to go to UA, or at least do everything within his power to fail his classes/get expelled??

the whole point of his fight with midoriya at the sports festival is todoroki accepting himself and that his power is his own, not endeavor's, and that its okay for him to become a hero using it

literally what does todoroki say after midoriya yells 'its your power isnt it?!' at him? in that moment where himself admits that he forgot all about endeavor and wasnt thinking about him at all??? he says 'I want to be a hero too'

look i get why this take is popular, lots of people can relate to todoroki in that they have shitty/abusive parents who forced them into a career path or life style they dont wanna do

and so obviously they project those feelings of discontent and resentment back onto todoroki

but in the literal canonical text of bnha, his character aspires to be a great hero just like midoriya and bakugou

if heroics truly was 100% something that endeavor just forced onto him, why did todoroki go to help midoriya and iida in hosu? why did he follow midoriya and bakugou at jaku? why did, along with kirishima, he approach yaoyorozu to get a nomu tracker off of her after bakugou was kidnapped and say that he was going to make a rescue attempt whether or not midoriya or anyone else joined him? why did he run in to try to save all might from the nomu at USJ?

like???? i dont have anything against people having differing interepretations of a character or headcanons from me, ofc different ppl will read the same thing differently

but this is a take that is just so extremely the opposite of todoroki's canonical characterisation it baffles me that its so common??

did we all miss the part where he was deeply frustrated with himself for failing he provisional liscence exam? or where he decided that he needed to be the one to stop dabi?? the fact that he carries first aid supplies in his hero costume so he can better help people?? or how he suggested a concert for the school festival because he thought itd be a good idea to do something 'fun' and 'stress relieving' for the other students at UA???

idk, ofc at the end of the day ppl can headcanon what they like and everyones interpretations are valid and none of this actually causes any harm to anybody etcetera etcetera, art is subjective and all that

(like this is benign fandom bullshit for a mediorce shounen battle series, im self aware that none of this actually matters)

but idk im just still confused as to how ppl seem to miss the point so fuckin badly with todoroki's character

[midnxght-sweet-time]

it's nice to see someone else whos into the beta ver of characters! i wish more would be released on them or, and this is very wishful thinking, even a "what if" type event where we'd see at least beta/prototype riddle as he had the most written for him irc

Yesss!!!! I really wished there was more beta charac reveal from Yana. So far we only have the beta designs of characs like Silver or Malleus but the biggest hidden lore drop for beta characs was mainly beta Riddle. Though Riddle had more reveal and even almost became 'canon'. Its kinda sad he was scrapped and just gone qwq

OHHHHH but beta Jade is a whole nother can of worms to deal with.

SO—

I imagine punk Jade was some kind of edge phase he had when he was younger before his suave professional look lmao

I hced Jade likes to play as the villian. Like he probs has those 'playlist that makes you feel like a villian'. I find it funny how he tends to play out like the most professional badass but also still acts pretty gullible sometimes.

Yall think Floyd is the creepy one??? Bruh Jade is more on playing with the psychological tactics which I find much more scarier—

Im pretty Jade at some point probably wants to best Floyd. I hced him to be the younger twin, and of course all younger siblings like to try and one up the other. Maybe thats why Jade used to be a punk kind of guy, probably a delinquent as well and prefers more physical violence like Floyd.

Until my guy find out that villians who have a more polished and courteous style tends to be the most prefered and appealing (and in most cases— attractive 7w7). Which results into the kind of eel we all know and love now ♡♡♡

I want punk Jade to exists in the canon universe!!! Do you know how interesting that will be??? But atleast we can indulge in sweet- make believe headcanons and say punk Jade was a past memory. Unless for whatever reason the tweels' backstory has been fully explained and Jade confirms doesnt have a punk phase I will hold onto this belief for dear life-

Omg but Punk Jade and Delinquent Deuce combined????? PLEASE-

Speaking of which: punk baby eel Jade vs momma's boy deliquent Deucey. Who'd you think would win??

[scalproie]

omg plz do 13, 16, and 25 for the violence ask meme on tekken FWKJFK sorry for so much im just interested to hear ur thoughts!!!

13. worst blorboficiation

Objectively, Lee is the "least evil" mishima and congrats to him for leaving (tho forcefully) that fucked up family and yeah his childhood sucked big time and I have to respect the hustle of him rebranding himself into the funny "excellent" flamboyant guy but GOD he somehow successfully tricked everybody into forgetting that he is also very not a good person. I KNOW we are starving for positive relationships in tekken but he is very much as egoistical and self-interested as the rest of his family, kazuya is his brother only by name only and lee not only doesnt care about him nor their father and he would happily throw him or both of them under the bus to get ahead LIKE HE IS DOING NOW BY WORKING WITH LARS AND JIN AGAINST KAZUYA. Lee could not have inherited raw power from heihachi so he got his manipulativeness, sketchyness and charisma, and lets not talk about how the devil gene is alienating both kaz and jin so there is no way lee could even keep up with that. But if he could I really doubt he would still be regarded as the meme man that he is now. I love lee but I feel like the only person that can see smth sinister lurking under the surface thats funny and approachable and even has friends. Thats not a negative btw I love that about lee but the overly kindness I see from people's interpretation of him sometimes take me out. Hes better, but hes still not good, yknow?

(as for mk im just slipping it there bc its fresh in my head, johnny cage holds the really heavy burden of being the only somewhat comical main character in a sea of dramatic people so he is doomed to be mischaracterized I think. Either hes treated TOO seriously and it feels... wrong in a way I cant explain OR he is subject to comical whorification. But thats just me hating fun I guess.)

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

Heihachi has the worst fucking development in tekken 7 it genuinely makes me insane that some people would enjoy this botched attempt of sympathy toward him, all while making fun of his original reasonning like "haha lions dont push their cubs off cliffs" WE KNOW its a traditional asian misconception that even has a name and it makes sense bc heihachi is old school but also ITS NOOOT ABOUT THE LITERAL LION THING ITS A METAPHOR ITS ABOUT GENERATIONAL TRAUMA AND TOXIC MASCULINITY GNGNHGNH and its BETTER than a hypothetical witch trial that makes NO SENSE bc HEIHACHI YOU THREW THE KID SAYING THAT IF HE SURVIVED, HE HAD THE EVIL IN HIM. AND THEN YOU RAISED HIM??? WHAT??? Its stupid. I hope he stays dead goodbye forever funny cockroach grandpa.

(mk break again but you genuinely have to explain 80% of the mk ships to me. Maybe its me being idk, a shipping paladin or smth and took an oath to the One True Pairing or whatever and im now blind to the rest but yeah I dont see the majority of it.)

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

EVERYONE SPEAKING THEIR OWN LANGUAGE AND EVERYBODY UNDERSTANDING EACH OTHER DESPITE THAT IS ONE OF THE BEST THING ABOUT TEKKEN. FUCK YOU IF YOU WANT AN ALL JAPANESE OR ENGLISH DUB. ITS ORIGINAL ITS INTERESTING ITS GOOD TO HAVE CHARACTERS SPEAKING ACTUAL FRENCH, SPANISH, PORTUGESE, KOREAN AND OTHER IN A MAINSTREAM VIDEOGAME. FUCK YOU FOREVER IF YOU WANT TO TAKE THAT AWAY OR IF ITS "WEIRD" TO YOU BC ITS NOT REALISTIC, BORING BITCH.

ALSO "NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE PLOT" I DO!!! I DOOO!!! IM NOT GONNA LOWER MY STANDARDS FOR THEM TO MAKE A GOOD SATISFYING STORY JUST BC YOU CARE MORE ABOUT EVO TOURNAMENTS, MICROFRAME DATA, AND IF YOUR WAIFU MAKE IT BACK IN THE MAIN ROSTER.

[tordistic]

Headcanons masterpost... or something

Its ridiculously long auhhh

Edd

Is a criminal banned from 98 countries 💔

But seriously, his ass does not get funds in a legal way. He used to be a hitman (pre-EW till '05-ish), and only does these sorts of jobs again if he has to. Thats why hes totally ok with killing people. Hes also ok with stealing and committing fraud, both which he also has done

Got a forklift certificate after the Hammer & Fail events. Originally it was just in case they decided to try to build something again. But due to my headcanon regarding the coke ban, you may have noticed that he used it with other motives.

Speaking of the cola free future: the reason why he's taller even though hes already an adult is due to radiation. It gave him a growth sprout on the long run.

Chronic insomniac, treats in with ambien, ends up with him in weird situations.

Forces his buddies to witness horrible stuff he finds on the internet, since he "refuses to suffer alone".

Theres a zero chance hes allo. Not allosexual. Not alloromantic. He just doesnt realize it since he doesnt think about his orientation. But believes he's bi since he feels the same way regarding men and women.

Tom

Hes humanoid, but not human. Explains the void eyes and the monster form. But nobody really cares about it, so its never explained lol

Unlike Edd, he tries to have a job that doesn't involve crime (usually retail). But due to comedy cartoon reasons, he's in and out of being employed.

When unemployed, he works on music composition and film making. Is it good? No, it fucking sucks. But it keeps him occupied at least.

Enjoys working with MIDIS. The type of guy that makes covers of full albums with the Mario 64 soundfont.

Yes, he can talk to inanimate objects. No, he never told the guys. Yes, they think he's out of his mind.

Not really insomniac, but his sleep cycle is BAD. Instead of going to a check up, he just drinks till he passes out.

Due to his non human nature, he can keep drinking alcohol and not suffer mayor consequences from it (coma, death, liver failure...). He doesn't know this.

Has piercings. They end up closing really quickly but hes a idiot so he keeps opening them back again and again

Transgender. Realized when he was a lad, and has been out since. Sometimes he forgets about it.

Bisexual, doesn't mind dating women, man, both, neither, cacti... Will be with anyone with or without a pulse!

Matt

Non human, thanks to the vampiric and the zombie episodes. So hes technically dead, but not really, sooooo a ghoul?. He can also eat raw meat without issue, but tries to avoid it. Is not cuz he doesn't like how it tastes or moral reasons, its cuz he gets scolded by the rest of the group

Used to work in retail till '07. Ever since he stopped, he's become a happier person.

But SOMEHOW, he has the best sleep cycle out off all of them. How he does it is a mystery.

He also dislikes when the guys even mention those episodes. He doesn't like remembering that he tried killing his friends more than once. He's also not sorry!

He's kind of a failson? But instead of mooching off his family, he mooches off his friends. He has tried at least three times to come up with a startup and ended up turning it into a MLM

His purple jumper came with an amoeba. He named it Richard and its the reason why he got dumber with time (brains ated)

He definitely still has world domination goals in mind, he's just too lazy to actually do it, and would rather prefer if someone gave him all the power he wanted.

Still a bitch! He's... Pretty manipulative. It doesn't work with the guys cuz they've lived with him for years and know how he acts.

"Matt door hand hook bomb door" was the only explanation given when asked about his future appearance (the jaw and eye thing). Not a single person has elaborated further.

Does a lil self care, to the point he and his room smells like a LUSH store....

Bi/Pan. Prefers dating women but doesn't mind dating someone whos not. Still, nobody wants him, so its double the failure u_u

Tord

He used to be a hitman as well, but stopped when all the Red Army stuff happened.

A great part of his book collection are manifestos and essays (the rest, ofc, being hentai).

Yknow those ahegao clothing? Yes, he has a full outfit of them. The rest has tried burning them so he won't wear them again, but it doesn't work!

Speaking of the Red Army... He's not the Red Leader, but thats due to the Leader not being real per se.

He also convinced the guys to join in the future loll

Also not technically insomniac, but he spends most of his nights binge-watching series, so his sleep schedule is also terrible

My guy hasnt seen a shower in a while. He definitely smells like something burnt though

Learnt mechanical engineering out of spite. Tom called him dumb so to prove him wrong he became a engineer all by himself.

Between leaving the house and returning, he was involved in a shoot out. He was scratched by a bullet and got injured in his face. Thats why he has a scar. Also thats why i draw him sometimes with a piece of his ear missing

Some type of queer (gender? orientation?), but refuses to accept it. Homophobic gay sort of deal. The if you gave him estrogen then none of this would have happened sort of fellow

The group (in general)

All of them in canon have a kill count in the dozens. I believe they all have a certain reputation for killing a shiton of zombies during the apocalypses (in plural), and are sometimes all tasked to go and take some undead peeps out. It gets boring after a while, but the pays good!

But the only actual hitmens were Edd & Tord. As in, they got paid to kill people. Matt & Tom have also killed humans but they weren't rewarded for it. Sad! Oh well.

They all come back to life with the power of comedy! If its funny if they die, then they die. If it's funnier if they don't, then they dont!

Theyre all autistic. All of them. And not a single one of them has realized.

I'll edit dis when I get a new vision or something idko

[dezemberzwolf]

Ff14 for 3 and 5, and zenos with 6 and 8

fandom ask meme!! ask me.... memes >:3

thamk u ilu....

3. which scene I would like to erase from the universe and why.

it technically was erased from the universe via retcon but every time someone mentions to me about the original moenbryda minion desc. that implied urianger was creepy towards her it makes me want to bite the writer again. also yknow what?? the lancer quest where foulques dies. my boy deserves to live so many other random ass shitty npcs get to live. like ok foulques was a dick but like he was a dick because every he knows decided to be racist at him and he HAD a POINT. like maybe some people deserved a stabbing. and yet 'known canon rapist npc ungust' gets to live? im sure theres 800 other things ill think of later bc its not as if the game is free of weird narrative choices, but ill be real. most of the time theres something where im like "this shouldnt Exist" i just vaporize and rewrite it in my mind LMAO. hear me out about werlyt

5. the scene from it that lives in my head rent free.

everything urianger has ever said in his entire life and also 90% of shadowbringers. its really good. for no particular character reason i think a whole lot about when you and the scions go to storm eulmore and u walk in on vauthry and ryne immediately screams 'no, make him stop' bc hes eating a pile of meol and i know. i know. in my heart. that if it wasnt gonna be too heavy gore and a bunch of graphics, the story intended that to be read as him ripping into and eating that lion sin eater that always sat in that exact spot. i know in my heart they ran in on him mid transformation eating a lion raw with his hands. i know this. shadowbringers is normal and fine for everyone involved.

also yknow in endwalker after [6.0 SPOILERS BEGIN] meteion reveals thancred is dead, urianger speaks and she immediately turns to him and goes 'youre full of loathing and dont even know why you still exist here'. that fucks me up every day. do you know how much has to happen for urianger, whose entire motivations this entire time is that he loves people so so much, to Actively Loathe you. to Hate a scared child. and he hates her because she killed thancred. and he doesnt know why its never him who gets to be the one sacrificed. im fine thats fine [END 6.0 SPOILERS]

6. the scene that I think shows just how awesome they really are.

The final fight with him here he speaks to the wol "not as a hero, but as an adventurer", and asks if your journey was a blessing or a curse. I like zenos because he is very much an exact foil for Laurel and that scene just shows that. hes aware of how close they are, and he cares.. he wants to know if someone 'like him', as the wol is, ever actually had a chance to live a life that could be enjoyable. he's trying to connect this entire time the only way he can understand you... i get if people dislike zenos. tbh im like, zenos agnostic outside of the context of him and the wol LOL but. i think at the end hes able to show that he really truly did connect with the wol. he managed to make a bond and some kind of understanding.

at least, with a wol like laurel.... with my other WoLs its like "YOU DONT GET SHIT GO AWAY!!!!!!" poor zenos. anyways him calling you an adventurer instead of a hero at the very end is neat. he cares about you he wants to understand very badly. he loves laurel hes her princess ok in this zenoswol laurel essay i will,

8. a headcanon I have about this character.

theres so much horny zenos fanart and i respect this i understand where it comes from but im also like. this man does not practically know what sex is and cannot flirt. he has only the hunt. if he fucks he does it almost by accident and it started as a fistfight or he has to be instructed into it. he has never seen pussy before. the wols gotta give him a diagram bc he understands concept but not execution. hes got other priorities.

also in In From The Cold when he possesses the wol the actual first thing he does is fall flat on his face because the center of gravity is way too different and hes not used to walking. and laurel specifically is lightly digitigrade and trekking around the snow in stiletto heels zenos gets into her body stand dramatically and then immediately eats shit because what the fuck how are you standing up like this.

[famouslastwrdz]

bedtime, again, with the jennings, and nobody is ready to sleep.

penance at the table two seats away from jesse, watching him draw symbols and intercrossed lines on the heavy embossed paper that lazarus gave him. his hat is on the table next to the tea that went cold two hours ago.

evan, blue, and vince talk about columbo in the corner seats, asmo occasionally snortlaughing at a mischaracterisation or a headcanon that he deems unsuitable. this doesnt deter them, all three coming up with steadily more ludicrous ideas about the man; his wife has been dead for 20 years, his dog is secretly a man in a costume and thats why he eats icecream, his solutions are divined from god.

tim and jay hover around kitchen and living room, unsure. tim won't come within a metre of penance nor jesse, or his coughing will split open the old operator mark on his shoulder. jay bites his nails and occasionally mutters something to tim, both concerned.

verne fronts with me to help do my homework. latin essay complete, he circles orange pen around points in the mortuary science papers, sticks post-its around my room, talks of apprenticeships and training and how its changed since his time. lazarus points out that verne is a hobby gravedigger, not employed. the priest interjects, the charateristic "ah! ah! hey," before reminding his husband that he dug graves for a *job* before they met, you know, it wasnt all secrecy and bodyparts. a fine occupation for a catholic, lazarus says. well, verne glares inside, at least i dont eat people.

thats in the bible, you bastard. blood and flesh.

so everyone you eat is jesus incarnate?

everyone on earth is jesus and he is all of us. honestly, vernie, is your bible merely decorative?

there's no biblical excuse for cannibalism, mister.

its not cannibalism, im not the same species.

if youre not even partly human, im going to get cancelled.

jesse starts to cough and the pen rolls off the table. they stop bickering and the jennings look across the room, and tim and jay slam the kitchen door behind them.

verne, unmoving, glances at me. lazarus fiddles with his wedding ring, spinning it over and over around his finger. all eyes set on penance, except the orange pair staring firmly at my face.

he resumes quietly, breaks the silence. telling me what qualifications i need, its 2 grand for the training i need, thats alright, the government will pay most.

WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT OF THAT,  penance's face says, and laurenzi freezes in his seat.

asmodeus is silent.

baby learned to speak again, huh. verne directs across the room, gaze still fixed on me. i stare back at him. blue fills the room with mask static, and penance chokes.

a cup breaks in the kitchen and tim's voice comes through the door gentle, jaybird, i can sweep that up. dont use your hands.

shortly after that we all decide to go to bed.

[aquanova99]

Do you think that the Denali’s learned each others’ languages. Like did Kate, Tanya, and Irina learn Spanish when Carmen and Eleazar joined? Did everyone learn the languages of Tanya, Kate, and Irina’s respective tribes because I don’t think the Slovakian language existed when the girls were humans

I feel like my Denali headcanons differ so vastly from happy, maybe I'm getting more sadistic... but you know when you go to family/friend reunions and talk to people with smiles but the second you stop you want to roll your eyes or you silently get irritated at the forced proximity?

💗The Denali Coven and their Native Tongues💗

Its not to say there is no love for one another but I mean, if you want to criticize how Carlilse thinks being a vampire condemns him to hell and then continues turning people, I mean I can at least make the argument that he was saving someone's life in a sense. But Sasha turned Tanya because she was in some way related and she wanted the company of another female. Tanya was from what we know okay with the transformation so I could see that she probably learned whatever language Sasha grew up with. I could also see Tanya not necessarily teaching Kate or Irina and wanting to keep something special between Sasha and herself.

I think Tanyas transformation changed something in Sasha, I think the curiosity of living with another vampire changed into a desire she may not have known she had originally. I think she wanted to become a mother. Maybe even felt like she was robbed of that chance like Rosalie feels. So a hundred or so years pass and they come across Kates caravan and they stop to feed. Sasha sees Kate is loyal, willing to die to protect the person she was assigned to most likely knowing it was useless, she also sees Kate bears a striking resemblance to Tanya and you know what? Tanya could use a sister right? This is where things a bit awry. Keep in mind none of these girls are children except maybe Irina, I cant check they took away the free online book I was using as reference 🥲 anyways. I just cant buy that all three women again, except maybe Irina, who grew up with families and lives were just happy with Sasha taking them away simply because they look related. All of this is to say, I dont think Kate ever shared her language with anyone until Garett. I also think that she stayed with Sasha and Tanya because, where the hell else was she going to go. Even though she was in her twenties I could see Sasha and Tanya treating her like a grumpy teenager. And Kate probably doesnt mind the label. Her and Tanya probably fight quite a bit, until she develops her powers. Then I think they just leave Kate to her devices.

Then comes Irina. Irina is supposed to be a peasant girl from a farming village, so I could see her maybe really attaching herself to the family story she gets shoved down her throat. I think Kate being so short and probably the actual younger sibling gets Kate to come out of her bubble. Irina brings out a protectiveness in both of the other sisters and it brings to a more neutral state, at least in the sense that they can be in the same room without hurling remarks at eachother. They absolutely know her native tongue just to make the transition easier. I do think once Sasha is punished by the volturi they stick to one language, and since they settled in Alaska they probably learned some Inuit and English. I do think in order to flirt with Laurent, Irina tried to speak french but her accent was pretty strong and thats why Laurent found her endearing

I think since these kinds of vampires cant sleep (which sounds so miserable pls) I think they probably pick things to learn about so I'm sure they are fluent in more than one language even if it may be hard to bring to memory. When it comes Carmen and Eleazar I think the Denalis definitely knew enough spanish to probably communicate with them but with the world changing and Eleazar being in the Volturi, they were the ones to adapt how they spoke. But I feel like Carmen thinks out loud and mumbles when shes upset and most of the time, she does this in spanish.