#astral trauma

[strangepersonthefirst]

So, I'm going to say something here.

Your astral trauma is fucking valid.

“oh but the astral isn't real, it's all mental” One, shut the fuck up why are you on this fucking blog

Two, IF IT'S HAPPENING VIVIDLY AND TRULY TO YOU, IT'S REAL ENOUGH AIN'T IT?

oh sure, my physical arms aren't being sawed off, but holy fuck does it feel like it!

A great majority of my trauma just comes from the astral, and admittedly I don't talk about it because I do not feel valid.

But I basically child soldiered myself. you found little 14 year old strange out in the battlefield, warping dead bodies and making it rain the blood of his enemies, alone because he was so convinced he was a monster for being a killer, and unsure how to grapple with that reality.

You found 13 year old strange fucking brutalizing gangs, trying to establish order in a 2-person child government as he clung to the only person he thought could help him.

You found 15 year old strange exhausted and angry, trying to stab anything that looked at him funny because he was a monster and everyone treated him like one, and he decided it was better to accept it than fight back.

Your astral traumas are valid. your astral traumas have shaped you. I know mine have.

[judgedarts]

please watch yugioh zexal

[soath]

the fact that the archheart took selena because he loved her and wanted to give her peace, and in the process left her suspended in an eternal static torment because he doesn't understand how something as fragile as a mortal soul works feels like a summary of the good intentions/bad long term outcome situation with godly soul custody. it makes sense that the gods would end up keeping some of their special followers! the first mortals to get in tight with the gods probably asked for it! the ego death of proper reincarnation is terrifying compared to staying up late hanging out with your buddy pelor. asmodeus and the hells aren't being half as kind about it yet the core motive remains—that hoarding instinct to keep what you love(or hate) and never let it go.

but you and i aren’t meant to be eternal. the kryn use anamnesis to ensure the continuity of self through endless lifetimes and they’re still losing themselves to it. selena was turned into a nighmarish human-faced star because the god she made out of metal thought that they could understand each other and she hung there in his domain burning, her last wish forever repeating on her lips, for a thousand years until he could release her. mortals don’t want to fully die and gods don’t want to let them go but nobody can stay in their frozen crystalline palace of eternity forever. eventually everything in the Real gets to change.

[piowasthere]

PIO

DROP ART OF REZ

AND MY LIFE

IS Y O U R S

Rizz. i mean Rez-

Buggy, plz calm down, i already own like 4 of your lives please- (both vers with and without the glitch effect, bc i honestly have no idea which one i like better)

also, my brain turned off here i forgot they talked smth 'bouta worm, i did not understood what they meant atm

i 100% stand behind the snake hc, but i forgot it for the life of me and realized way too late 😭

i promise i'll fix it next time- it'll be right- 😭😭😭

[fantomette22]

This bad boys can fit so much freaking trauma in it

[ssilentwillow]

saying it now and saying it publicly if sunday gets to be on the astral express but robin doesnt im going to be SO INCREDIBLY PISSED. THAT SPOT SHOULD GO TO ROBIN OR NO ONE AT ALL!!!!

[jediknightjameslunagazer23]

So, I've been thinking about easing back into drawing some Trauma Center stuff and posting it here again, and thus I made this drawing the redone astral realm attire Doctor James "Lunagazer" Kalveria, inspired from Aileen and Storm's Trauma Center Manga for how Derek appears in ancient Greek attire as an Asclepiad for some of the cover arts, I decided to have another crack at it from how I've done it the first time nearly 3 years ago now.

In this take, I intially planned it to be a sort of cross between Apollo and Artemis' attires as I did consider having James connected to two Greek Mythology gods, but I decided to stick with Apollo connections alone for him in terms of what I'm currently planning out his story arc as the co-protagonist of an altered version of UTK 2 alongside Adel Tulba and Heather Ross.

But the biggest departure is that unlike the Greek God he's connected to, James doesn't have a bow or arrow, but instead, he uses a sword shaped with parts of Apollo's lyre, as James would more prefer to fight in close range rather from a distance, and it also represents his want to be a strong protector of everyone close to him, hence the more Knight-inspired armor, making him kind of a mix of mage and Knight.

However, he also has winged boots as a not only a reference to Hermes and his connection with Apollo but also for another reason, as unlike Derek, James doesn't manifest energy wings when tapping into his power... yet, since he's still in training as a doctor, and the crown on top of his head plays a major factor in his own superpowers of enhanced vision, far stronger and wider than that of a regular medical ultrasound but it will be revealed when I get to my own take on UTK 2.

[taradactylus]

So uh.... are we just going to ignore the fact that the Astral Bodies are reincarnated??? Like... Castor said (I think in the Lunar gets flustered episode...) that they indeed can die, and they are reincarnated, they just dont talk about their previous deaths at all. So... THEORETICALLY, they were most likely born with powers like Lunar, and they had to get training like Lunar... which means they had some sort of ATLA vibe reveal at a reasonable age they are a reincarnation of xy Astral Body, and from that moment on there is no going back.... And now I'm wondering, if Gemini having technically two separate person in one mind, and not in a Sun and Moon sense, and Castor answering with "You could say that..." when asked if Pollux is his sister leaves me with a million questions.

Sibling dynamic logically shouldn't be only an earthly thing, so THEORETICALLY, Castor knows whats a sibling. And also Castor and Pollux's dynamic, with Castor being silent, monotone and wise like an overly traumatized-but-got-used-to-it grown up, and Pollux being loud and quirky and child-like... I might read too much into it and jumping to conclusions (but I can at least headcanon), but Im having a feeling Castor went through shit before they officially became Astrals which Pollux might not even know of. Also the fact we get a kind of boy-coded and girl-coded (idk if they have actual genders tbh) characters in one, seemingly also girl-coded body raises further questions

[kairukitsuneo]

When Pom-Pom spray you just as you abroad the Astral Express...

(I dint manage to screenshot the moment Pom-Pom spray me but here are some continuation after the spray below cut)

[starheirxero]

ALSO IM ACTUALLY A LITTLE VERY EXTREMELY EMOTIONAL ABOUT LUNAR SAYING THAT THEY FEEL SAFE IN SPACE BECAUSE THAT’S WHERE THEY WERE WHEN THEY WERE DEAD AND NOTHING HURT THEM WHEN THEY WERE DEAD. LIKE. AOAAOUUGHGHHH?!?!!!!

Even Helios trying to say “there’s still things that can hurt you in space. you wouldn’t be entirely safe there.” and Lunar just going “but I felt safe.” is so :(((((

Someone please get this poor lil dude OUT of these situations so that he doesn’t have to be literally dead and in limbo to feel like he’s safe

[thefallenangelsgang]

Last Line Challenge

In a new post, show the last line you wrote (or drew) and tag as many people as there are words (or however many as you like).

Tagged by @fablewritesnonsense

Fable you have got to be clairvoyant in some manner because your timing is scary accurate. I just put down my writing for today not even a half hour ago. This is the first time narrative has felt easy in months. UNFORTUNATELY THE LAST LINE IS SHORT AND NOT NARRATIVELY INTERESTING *SHAKES FISTS AT GOD*

From a unfinished maybe chapter of what could become my Baldur's Gate 3 Fic:

And reality comes crashing down.

(fuck it I'm going to post the incomplete chapter and link it here)

Tags (no pressure, I just really appreciate these peeps writing/art styles!):

@helena-bug @caesarflickermans @druidgroves @roystory4 @rosegardeninwinter

[strangepersonthefirst]

Are you open to discussing astral trauma? I'm very new to tapping into spirituality & I'd appreciate it if you could share how to be safe

Ooh. Ok. So. Please be aware this entire post will be colored by my own astral traumas. I've gotten over a lot of this. Kind of! Ok. also TWs for Sui, Abuse, Violence on Every count. So, Between the astral and physical, you start (I say start because oh boy spirituality is weird..) You start with one mind that can't intentionally divide between the shit that happens astrally and the shit that happens physically. So, let's say this. You're living in an abusive situation at home. Spirituality is both keeping you from offing yourself, and getting you out of the situation because you've learned to Astral Project or even Bilocate. Escape reached! Let's say you've gotten to.. a city, perhaps. No big destiny crap, no gods, Just a city. 2 spirits decide to rob you in an allyway. You try to fight back with what you have. They cut off your arm. You kill them. Suddenly this isn't an escape anymore. You lost an arm. Depending on who you are, you don't even have the means to just put it back. What's worse for you? The arm-loss thing is a modified version of the first taste of spiritual violence I ever really got injured in. I was 11. I didn't have an abusive household, but I was running from my own brain at the time. I didn't feel great. Now then, we're swapping gears to my story, but you asked so buckle the hell in. That was my first taste of violence. Unfortunately for me, I actually was a fucking idiot and decided to try and rule a spirit city. At probably 12. Never said I was smart. So I got into a lot more fights, and I killed.. A lot. And uhm. I was raised human! So you can imagine how I felt about killing a metric FUCKTON of people. And I didn't stop, because I was also getting into more physical trauma (because traumatic situations compound!) So as I went into the years where my personality was developing, I literally had to rationalize the idea of murder to myself so that I didn't kill myself for being a monster. And I actually consider myself way luckier. A lot of people who AP are older, and smart enough to try and get a guide-spirit to help them out. However, why help when you can take advantage of someone and manipulate them into doing anything for you? It's stuff like this that fueled my original RB. because you're absolutely right that AP is an escape for people. I still use it to escape from my current situation as I try to plot out my life. But if you aren't in the lucky, lucky minority, AP will have it's fucking nasty share of traumas to hand you, or it'll just worsen ones you have.

[seeinginthedark]

More things coming to me now , in this psychosis of mine :

I want to go back to the astral realm like fuckn ASAP. But the only way I can get there is through sleep paralysis. So I’ve stopped using because I remember the other times I’ve had sleep paralysis was when I going through withdrawals from the substance I used to have a lot of.

I need to go to the astral realm to confirm what is going up there . Yesterday someone told me that the matrix extends “ up /into” the astral realm, not just here.

How could this happen. It fits into my theory that A.I technology/the Artificial Consciousness has infiltrated our afterlife processes , putting us in these never- ending reincarnation loops. I can’t confirm this until I go to the astral realm and see it for myself .

So I’m grumpy and tired as fuck because I’m not using . I know I can’t just Willy nilly enter that realm on a whim, I need to go through the initiation first. The spirits and beings up there put you through some rough times to see how you handle it. A personal sacrifice has to be made, or surviving a trauma also can be an initiation.

Well once again , my lover, my husband, my other half has been put on the chopping block. I told these entities to leave him alone . He’s been through enough. We’ve been interfered with , again. He’s been removed from my life . That was the sacrifice. It’s sad . I miss him . We can’t see each other or he will get arrested. We had 18 beautiful, drug free months together. No fights, no arguments, no infiltration, no violence . Then a sudden personality swap , things whispered in his ears , paranoid thoughts and him lashing out at me. I didn’t even call the cops this time. It was my pesky useless mental health nurse that did. The entities know how much I love this man. They know what it means to me to lose him. That’s why they fuck with his mind, to get to me. To cause me trauma. Force me to survive it. Initiate me . Invite me into their world. Increase my abilities. Continue this on -going mission that I keep trying to complete, life time after life time. My soul is getting so tired of this. And I miss my Inner Earth home and my Inner Earth family and my Inner Earth friends there. It’s been very isolated for me here, on the surface of Mother Earth. It’s so fucked up how people treat each other here. So I have to push on with the mission.

It’s ok. I’m an alchemist so I know how to transmute my pain into something useful and positive. Pain has become my power. It is the gateway. But I hate seeing my husband suffer for it each time . Now he’s addicted again, missing us, not able to see us . Stuck in an addiction loop.

You know that addicts are truly beautiful souls deep down. They are important for this battle we are in. This battle for humanity and for our souls. They get stuck in addiction as it’s part of their plan, the bad entities. Who feed off the addiction and pain that goes along with it. I see addicts as heroes who forgot they were hero’s . Lost track of the mission.

I’m seriously sick of being messed with . I’m done with being trapped in this matrix simulation . I’m coming for the ones that created it and the ones that monitor us . I’m going to destroy them. I’ve known since I was a child we were being watched. I’m not paranoid about it, just aware. We won’t be enslaved anymore . Or tricked and deceived and used like batteries. Putting families through hell. Exploiting us.

Enough is enough .

[blackvahana]

Yeah. Man. I'm just sitting here remembering I've been doing this my entire life. I feel like there was a patch I wasn't, part of the teen years, and that's either I've forgotten because trauma orrrr something else but

No wonder I've never felt anchored on this plane. But it doesn't matter, well, no, it matters a lot, but this life is just constantly isolating in how it works so I will keep the talk of not fitting in here and what being weirdly one got in one foot out has done to talking to myself lmfao but... I remember. I remember being in the garden as a really young child and I'm not a young child. I'm this chimaeric fairy-type thing of swirling and bulging colours like a psychedelic faceted-insect-eye's led trip, four or more wings of different types that are again, so ungrounded, so psychedelic, vivid. Not uncertain. Not half-formed. Fully formed, the starbeing in me just barely contained in the shape of the human-pretending-to-be-a-fae it's pretending to be

I remember so much, actually, and it's. it's just weirdly melancholic....? Maybe not melancholic, but it's so sad and I don't know why. Actually. I mean I've been trying to piece it together for like twenty minutes now but... People get a little irritated at me for being very "you don't understand and no one sees me" but like. I have lived an entire life walkinv streets where no one sees me. It's very complicated, there's. mental health stuff in there because of course I've come across a lot of spirits but I have bad issues seeing people as real but like. Man yeah no I am a snail and one part of me can be physically seen but the other has always been on the other side

[archivestarlyht]

the emperor : do this :)

sol’rys : i will do the opposite, in fact <3

[abyssalpriest]

Just woke from a fascinating AF dream where there was this sort of boat festival in a town where I lived and people would build boats to be in it, and theyd take around kids/teens from regional schools each year for the festival. My boat is built to work off singing, insert dream (and weird strands of astral) logic where when you sang it filled the sails. Specifically though I'd teach the kids this four line song from a mother's perspective that was basically:

O, (something), have you seen my daughter

Her husband (killed her and left her body at sea)

(cannot remember this line at all)

And so I deliver her his head

Literally just. this song about going out to sea with your daughters husbands severed head to throw it in the depths to show her sea-swallowed body that you got revenge. And honestly. that's the most Red Sky dream I've ever dreamt. There's been times she's been in my dream stirring up storms and shit and no this one? This teacherly captain who, each year, take on the teens from local schools who come to learn about boats and gets them to row by singing THAT song... fascinating