#aspen with friends 2023

[datshitrandom]

Darren and Mia Criss at the first annual WHITESPACE get together in Aspen | March, 2013 | 📸 by Nina Dobrev

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Greenwashing set Canada on fire

On September 22, I'm (virtually) presenting at the DIG Festival in Modena, Italy. On September 27, I'll be at Chevalier's Books in Los Angeles with Brian Merchant for a joint launch for my new book The Internet Con and his new book, Blood in the Machine.

As a teenager growing up in Ontario, I always envied the kids who spent their summers tree planting; they'd come back from the bush in September, insect-chewed and leathery, with new muscle, incredible stories, thousands of dollars, and a glow imparted by the knowledge that they'd made a new forest with their own blistered hands.

I was too unathletic to follow them into the bush, but I spent my summers doing my bit, ringing doorbells for Greenpeace to get my neighbours fired up about the Canadian pulp-and-paper industry, which wasn't merely clear-cutting our old-growth forests – it was also poisoning the Great Lakes system with PCBs, threatening us all.

At the time, I thought of tree-planting as a small victory – sure, our homegrown, rapacious, extractive industry was able to pollute with impunity, but at least the government had reined them in on forests, forcing them to pay my pals to spend their summers replacing the forests they'd fed into their mills.

I was wrong. Last summer's Canadian wildfires blanketed the whole east coast and midwest in choking smoke as millions of trees burned and millions of tons of CO2 were sent into the atmosphere. Those wildfires weren't just an effect of the climate emergency: they were made far worse by all those trees planted by my pals in the eighties and nineties.

Writing in the New York Times, novelist Claire Cameron describes her own teen years working in the bush, planting row after row of black spruces, precisely spaced at six-foot intervals:

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/15/opinion/wildfires-treeplanting-timebomb.html

Cameron's summer job was funded by the logging industry, whose self-pegulated, self-assigned "penalty" for clearcutting diverse forests of spruce, pine and aspen was to pay teenagers to create a tree farm, at nine cents per sapling (minus camp costs).

Black spruces are made to burn, filled with flammable sap and equipped with resin-filled cones that rely on fire, only opening and dropping seeds when they're heated. They're so flammable that firefighters call them "gas on a stick."

Cameron and her friends planted under brutal conditions: working long hours in blowlamp heat and dripping wet bulb humidity, amidst clouds of stinging insects, fingers blistered and muscles aching. But when they hit rock bottom and were ready to quit, they'd encourage one another with a rallying cry: "Let's go make a forest!"

Planting neat rows of black spruces was great for the logging industry: the even spacing guaranteed that when the trees matured, they could be easily reaped, with ample space between each near-identical tree for massive shears to operate. But that same monocropped, evenly spaced "forest" was also optimized to burn.

It burned.

The climate emergency's frequent droughts turn black spruces into "something closer to a blowtorch." The "pines in lines" approach to reforesting was an act of sabotage, not remediation. Black spruces are thirsty, and they absorb the water that moss needs to thrive, producing "kindling in the place of fire retardant."

Cameron's column concludes with this heartbreaking line: "Now when I think of that summer, I don’t think that I was planting trees at all. I was planting thousands of blowtorches a day."

The logging industry committed a triple crime. First, they stole our old-growth forests. Next, they (literally) planted a time-bomb across Ontario's north. Finally, they stole the idealism of people who genuinely cared about the environment. They taught a generation that resistance is futile, that anything you do to make a better future is a scam, and you're a sucker for falling for it. They planted nihilism with every tree.

That scam never ended. Today, we're sold carbon offsets, a modern Papal indulgence. We are told that if we pay the finance sector, they can absolve us for our climate sins. Carbon offsets are a scam, a market for lemons. The "offset" you buy might be a generated by a fake charity like the Nature Conservancy, who use well-intentioned donations to buy up wildlife reserves that can't be logged, which are then converted into carbon credits by promising not to log them:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/12/12/fairy-use-tale/#greenwashing

The credit-card company that promises to plant trees every time you use your card? They combine false promises, deceptive advertising, and legal threats against critics to convince you that you're saving the planet by shopping:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/11/17/do-well-do-good-do-nothing/#greenwashing

The carbon offset world is full of scams. The carbon offset that made the thing you bought into a "net zero" product? It might be a forest that already burned:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/03/11/a-market-for-flaming-lemons/#money-for-nothing

The only reason we have carbon offsets is that market cultists have spent forty years convincing us that actual regulation is impossible. In the neoliberal learned helplessness mind-palace, there's no way to simply say, "You may not log old-growth forests." Rather, we have to say, "We will 'align your incentives' by making you replace those forests."

The Climate Ad Project's "Murder Offsets" video deftly punctures this bubble. In it, a detective points his finger at the man who committed the locked-room murder in the isolated mansion. The murderer cheerfully admits that he did it, but produces a "murder offset," which allowed him to pay someone else not to commit a murder, using market-based price-discovery mechanisms to put a dollar-figure on the true worth of a murder, which he duly paid, making his kill absolutely fine:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/14/for-sale-green-indulgences/#killer-analogy

What's the alternative to murder offsets/carbon credits? We could ask our expert regulators to decide which carbon intensive activities are necessary and which ones aren't, and ban the unnecessary ones. We could ask those regulators to devise remediation programs that actually work. After all, there are plenty of forests that have already been clearcut, plenty that have burned. It would be nice to know how we can plant new forests there that aren't "thousands of blowtorches."

If that sounds implausible to you, then you've gotten trapped in the neoliberal mind-palace.

The term "regulatory capture" was popularized by far-right Chicago School economists who were promoting "public choice theory." In their telling, regulatory capture is inevitable, because companies will spend whatever it takes to get the government to pass laws making what they do legal, and making competing with them into a crime:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/13/public-choice/#ajit-pai-still-terrible

This is true, as far as it goes. Capitalists hate capitalism, and if an "entrepreneur" can make it illegal to compete with him, he will. But while this is a reasonable starting-point, the place that Public Choice Theory weirdos get to next is bonkers. They say that since corporations will always seek to capture their regulators, we should abolish regulators.

They say that it's impossible for good regulations to exist, and therefore the only regulation that is even possible is to let businesses do whatever they want and wait for the invisible hand to sweep away the bad companies. Rather than creating hand-washing rules for restaurant kitchens, we should let restaurateurs decide whether it's economically rational to make us shit ourselves to death. The ones that choose poorly will get bad online reviews and people will "vote with their dollars" for the good restaurants.

And if the online review site decides to sell "reputation management" to restaurants that get bad reviews? Well, soon the public will learn that the review site can't be trusted and they'll take their business elsewhere. No regulation needed! Unleash the innovators! Set the job-creators free!

This is the Ur-nihilism from which all the other nihilism springs. It contends that the regulations we have – the ones that keep our buildings from falling down on our heads, that keep our groceries from poisoning us, that keep our cars from exploding on impact – are either illusory, or perhaps the forgotten art of a lost civilization. Making good regulations is like embalming Pharaohs, something the ancients practiced in mist-shrouded, unrecoverable antiquity – and that may not have happened at all.

Regulation is corruptible, but it need not be corrupt. Regulation, like science, is a process of neutrally adjudicated, adversarial peer-review. In a robust regulatory process, multiple parties respond to a fact-intensive question – "what alloys and other properties make a reinforced steel joist structurally sound?" – with a mix of robust evidence and self-serving bullshit and then proceed to sort the two by pantsing each other, pointing out one another's lies.

The regulator, an independent expert with no conflicts of interest, sorts through the claims and counterclaims and makes a rule, showing their workings and leaving the door open to revisiting the rule based on new evidence or challenges to the evidence presented.

But when an industry becomes concentrated, it becomes unregulatable. 100 small and medium-sized companies will squabble. They'll struggle to come up with a common lie. There will always be defectors in their midst. Their conduct will be legible to external experts, who will be able to spot the self-serving BS.

But let that industry dwindle to a handful of giant companies, let them shrink to a number that will fit around a boardroom table, and they will sit down at a table and agree on a cozy arrangement that fucks us all over to their benefit. They will become so inbred that the only people who understand how they work will be their own insiders, and so top regulators will be drawn from their own number and be hopelessly conflicted.

When the corporate sector takes over, regulatory capture is inevitable. But corporate takeover isn't inevitable. We can – and have, and will again – fight corporate power, with antitrust law, with unions, and with consumer rights groups. Knowing things is possible. It simply requires that we keep the entities that profit by our confusion poor and thus weak.

The thing is, corporations don't always lie about regulations. Take the fight over working encryption, which – once again – the UK government is trying to ban:

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2023/feb/24/signal-app-warns-it-will-quit-uk-if-law-weakens-end-to-end-encryption

Advocates for criminalising working encryption insist that the claims that this is impossible are the same kind of self-serving nonsense as claims that banning clearcutting of old-growth forests is impossible:

https://twitter.com/JimBethell/status/1699339739042599276

They say that when technologists say, "We can't make an encryption system that keeps bad guys out but lets good guys in," that they are being lazy and unimaginative. "I have faith in you geeks," they said. "Go nerd harder! You'll figure it out."

Google and Apple and Meta say that selectively breakable encryption is impossible. But they also claim that a bunch of eminently possible things are impossible. Apple claims that it's impossible to have a secure device where you get to decide which software you want to use and where publishers aren't deprive of 30 cents on every dollar you spend. Google says it's impossible to search the web without being comprehensively, nonconsensually spied upon from asshole to appetite. Meta insists that it's impossible to have digital social relationship without having your friendships surveilled and commodified.

While they're not lying about encryption, they are lying about these other things, and sorting out the lies from the truth is the job of regulators, but that job is nearly impossible thanks to the fact that everyone who runs a large online service tells the same lies – and the regulators themselves are alumni of the industry's upper eschelons.

Logging companies know a lot about forests. When we ask, "What is the best way to remediate our forests," the companies may well have useful things to say. But those useful things will be mixed with actively harmful lies. The carefully cultivated incompetence of our regulators means that they can't tell the difference.

Conspiratorialism is characterized as a problem of what people believe, but the true roots of conspiracy belief isn't what we believe, it's how we decide what to believe. It's not beliefs, it's epistemology.

Because most of us aren't qualified to sort good reforesting programs from bad ones. And even if we are, we're probably not also well-versed enough in cryptography to sort credible claims about encryption from wishful thinking. And even if we're capable of making that determination, we're not experts in food hygiene or structural engineering.

Daily life in the 21st century means resolving a thousand life-or-death technical questions every day. Our regulators – corrupted by literally out-of-control corporations – are no longer reliable sources of ground truth on these questions. The resulting epistemological chaos is a cancer that gnaws away at our resolve to do anything about it. It is a festering pool where nihilism outbreaks are incubated.

The liberal response to conspiratorialism is mockery. In her new book Doppelganger, Naomi Klein tells of how right-wing surveillance fearmongering about QR-code "vaccine passports" was dismissed with a glib, "Wait until they hear about cellphones!"

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/05/not-that-naomi/#if-the-naomi-be-klein-youre-doing-just-fine

But as Klein points out, it's not good that our cellphones invade our privacy in the way that right-wing conspiracists thought that vaccine passports might. The nihilism of liberalism – which insists that things can't be changed except through market "solutions" – leads us to despair.

By contrast, leftism – a muscular belief in democratic, publicly run planning and action – offers a tonic to nihilism. We don't have to let logging companies decide whether a forest can be cut, or what should be planted when it is. We can have nice things. The art of finding out what's true or prudent didn't die with the Reagan Revolution (or the discount Canadian version, the Mulroney Malaise). The truth is knowable. Doing stuff is possible. Things don't have to be on fire.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/16/murder-offsets/#pulped-and-papered

[lunarbuck]

Aspen my love 😘🩷🫶 I’m so so so happy you enjoyed!!!!

Kinktober Week 1: Thigh Riding

header by @jen-with-a-pen

Pairing: Lee Bodecker x f!reader (any race)

WC: 917

Prompt: Thigh riding

Warnings: swearing, thigh riding, heavy petting, pet names [sweetheart]

my masterlist | kinktober masterlist | @lunarbucklibrary

The front door slams shut, and you jump at the sound, the wooden spoon in your hand clattering against the counter. You quickly pick it back up, stirring the soup you've spent all day making. Lee thunders into the kitchen, heavy footsteps dragging slightly against the tile floor. 

You throw a glance over your shoulder, finding your Sheriff boyfriend settling in at the dinner table. He shrugs off his jacket and places his hat on the table, running a hand over his hair.

"How was your day, sweetie?" You ask, turning off the stove. Just from the way he walked in, you know it probably wasn't great, but if that's the case, he'll need to get it off his chest. It's better to ask and hear about it than for him to keep it all bottled up.

"This reelection shit is really getting on my nerves," he grumbles. "And Sandy…" You don't have to look at him to know he's rolling his eyes at the thought of his sister. "I don't even want to think about all the problems she's causin' me right now." You nod along with his words, serving up the soup into two bowls and grabbing Lee a beer from the fridge.

Your skirt swishes around your knees as you move around the kitchen. Lee likes it when you wear skirts, but honestly, you really like it too. You like the way they move, the way they hug your figure and smooth out the parts you don't love so much. As you set the table, you can feel Lee's eyes follow you around.

"Well, you're a shoo-in for the election, hun. No one pays Sandy any mind." Lee mumbles under his breath, probably disagreeing with you, but you don't bother to hear it. Lee's a stubborn man, and you know when to pick your battles. 

"Smells good," he says, watching you place a bowl of soup in front of him. He leans down and breathes in the aromatic steam, a pleasant smile spreading across his face. You move to step away, but his hand grasps your waist. "You're always takin' such good care of me, sweetheart."

"Well, you're out there keeping me safe, taking care of everyone else," you reply, resting your hand on his shoulder. "It's the least I can do." Lee tugs you down to sit on his lap, and you wrap your arms around him. He's always liked holding you at the end of a long day. Knowing that you're safe and sound relaxes him. 

You lean your head on Lee's shoulder as he tastes the soup. He moans his approval, digging in for more. You hadn't always imagined this life for yourself. Stay-at-home-girlfriend wasn't what you'd originally planned to be, but truthfully, you enjoy it. You know you want to go back to work soon, but that's a problem for future you. Current you is loving the way Lee's fingers squeeze your waist, the way he's enjoying something you made.

Before you know it, Lee's bowl is empty. He leans back in his chair and lets his eyes roam over your figure. He shifts the way you're sitting so your legs straddle his thigh, and your skirt rides up with the movement. You can't help but tilt your pelvis, relishing the slight friction of his muscular thigh against your clit.

"Sweetheart," he warns as he runs his hands up your legs. "Don't go startin' somethin' you can't finish." You grin, rocking your hips against Lee's leg and ignoring his stern words.

"Who says I can't finish this, Sheriff?" Your fingers trail down the buttons on the front of his shirt before landing on the bulge in his slacks. His grip on your hips tightens, increasing the pressure on your clit.

Lee's eyes are fused to the spot where you're grinding against him, and he pushes your skirt up higher to see more. You know your panties are soaked, the fabric sticking to your sensitive flesh. You're desperate for more contact, to feel the rough texture of his slacks against your pussy.

"Fuck, sweetheart. You look so perfect, riding my thigh with that perfect pussy." Lee's words make your clit throb, and you grip his shoulders tighter. "Lemme help you with that." He reaches between the two of you and tugs your panties to the side, and groans, running his finger over your clit.

Each grind against his muscular thigh sends sparks shooting through your body, and every brush of his finger against your clit sends you plummeting closer to the edge. Lee's eyes are dark and hungry, watching you take your pleasure from him. 

"Lee," you whimper, tugging his head closer to kiss him. The moment your lips find his, he's devouring you. His tongue slides against yours, and you speed up your movements on his thigh. His fingers dig into your flesh, guiding your hips closer and closer to your orgasm.

"Come for me, sweetheart. Come for me and show me how perfect you are." His voice is raspy and deep, desperate. Your whole body tightens, and you hold your breath as you come. Lee watches with hooded, lust-filled eyes, drinking in the sight of you.

As you come down from your high, Lee hooks his arms under your ass, picking you up. He starts toward the bedroom, and you cast a glance at your bowl of soup, long gone cold.

"I'll reheat it, and you can eat it in bed, sweetheart. Let me take care of you first."

@flightlessangelwings | #fawktober2023 list

I am discontinuing my taglist, more info to come! Follow @lunarbucklibrary and turn on notifications to be alerted of my new works. Must be 18+

Everything tags: @peaches1958 @pono-pura-vida @emi11ie @paulasocean @silverfire475 @lovingchoices14 @nekoannie-chan @late-to-the-party-81 @chibijusstuff @midnightramyeoncravings @wickidlady @buckyb-stan @adoreyouusugar @sebastianstanisagod @kayden666 @km-ffluv @winters1917 @buckysprettybaby @youdontknowmegls @marvellover31415

Lee tags: @v-velvetykisscs @Aussiegurl1234 @Silly60sblog @wintasssoldier @hallecarey1 @jbucb @pattiemac1 @saiyanprincessswanie @purple-vegan @cope69seethe

Kinktober tags: @casa-boiardi @writing-for-marvel @harleycao

[blackwood4stucky]

do you trust me with your scars enough to show me your heart

author: aspen blackwood

series: wonder if it's room in heaven for savages

james “bucky” barnes x steve rogers | mcu

masterpost | 🅼 | word count: 3455 | multichapter fic

tags: creature au, non traditional omegaverse, pre war ➳ ww2 era stucky, twisted fairytale

There was always a sweetness that lingered in Steve’s nose whenever he spent time with Bucky Barnes. It was a light floral scent with underlying honey and peach that followed Bucky wherever he went. Steve was never too far behind, low eyes and an intoxicated grin gracing his features every time. It was the look of a boy caught in a snare. - A dark and twisted fairytale.

bingo fills + event prompts

@anyfandomaubingo | free space

@afgomegaversebingo | falling asleep together

@anyfandomfluffbingo | cuddling in bed

@augustwritingchallenge: april showers brings m-au flowers | flower language

@avengersbingo | soulmate au

@badthingshappenbingo | forgetting to eat

@buckybarnesbingo: round 6 | u1: bed sharing

@buckybarnesevents

babb 2023 | soulgazing [march prompt] hot bucky summer 2024 | week 4: free week

creatures & cryptids: into the wilds bingo | will o’ wisp

crossover bingo | soulmates au

@eclipsingbingo

card 1 | blood from mouth card 2 | biting

@fandombingo: r1999 bingo | rpf card: "your hands are trembling"

@fandom-free-bingo

valentine’s edition | fairy au wild edition | broken skin + childhood friends world book night edition | iele au

@hurtcomfort-bingo | falling asleep on each other

hurt and comfort bingo: pick your poison bingo round 1 | fever

@julybreakbingo: pre july 24 | canon divergence, kink: wings

kinky-things-happen | cuddling

loversbingo

the conflict | throwing a punch the reeling | unsure & suspicious the solution | dark magic

scalding hot: consent issues bingo | wings as erogenous zones

@seasonaldelightsbingo: language of flowers bingo | spearmint [warm sentiment]

@stuckygeekevents: stucky geek bingo | tension, body image issues

@sweetspicybingo: hurt/comfort bingo | hand holding

@the-slumberparty: sundae bar | cookies & cream: soulmates

@yearoftheotpevent | march: fairytale au

read ch. 1: a maze you love getting lost in

ao3 | sqwa

mini playlist

[drabblesandimagines]

2023 Fic Recs

I've seen a couple of posts where people are sharing some of their favourite Tumblr fics of the year, so here's mine. I must stress I have too many to list, but here's four that I've re-read multiple times this year cos I adored them. Whilst I'm primarily a fluff blog, I do interact with spicier content so bear that in mind before you click!

1. I Am Afraid Not Of Leaving But Being Forgotten by @pinkkittysaw (18+ blog - SFW but please respect pinkkittysaw boundaries of not having minors interact with their work) Oh, Clive Rosfield, I love you so. All of pinkkittysaw's work is wonderful, but I have such a soft spot for a soft, caring Clive and as someone who has low self-esteem (working on it, my friends!) this just speaks to my soul.

2. Ask Request by @neondogs (18+ blog, SFW piece) I haven't played a single game that contains Chris Redfield and only seen parts of Vendetta, but Aspen's Chris Redfield x reader fics have made me fall in love. I'm all about the comfort and Chris comforting reader after a nightmare, respecting boundaries, cuddling them close... Oh, it's wonderful!

3. Beyond Our Vessels by @cryptictongues (18+ blog, NSFW piece) Barnabas x Sleipnir x reader threesome. I will forever say there is not enough Barnabas Tharmr x reader content out there, and this is pure indulgent porn without plot with the added bonus of beautiful, loyal Sleipnir and ooft. OOFT.

4. Drakes with an Anxious S/O Headcanons by @nathandrakeisabottom (SFW piece, blog has 18+ content) I threw myself into their ask box with an anonymous ask about how the Drake Brothers would be with an anxious significant other after my anxiety was really rearing its head in December and I'd played all of the Uncharted games in 2023. I absolutely adore this - I've re-read it so many times already and it always puts a smile on my face!

Wishing you all a wonderful 2024 x

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

[patheticbatman]

As of Chapter 81, this is crew of the Courageous from Time to Orbit: Unknown, a marvellous space drama and mystery by @derinthescarletpescatarian . Original sketches & character guide below. Many of the character appearances are based on headcanon, but the ones with asterisks are based on canon sources.

I drew Celi first! I figured I would do the people in front, who I would have to draw most of their bodies, and work from left to right. Celi has had multiple organ issues, so she looks a little drawn (lol) and is still recovering in her wheelchair :). I drew her with small braids just hanging from the top of her head, as I imagine she’s too tired to take care of her hair very often, but still wants to keep some, so she has a sort of cap of braids. There’s probably a term for the style, but idk. Celi is of North African descent.

Next to Celi is Renn. His head looks wonky because I was drawing at an angle at the time. He’s been mostly depilated, and I imagine him in a sort of Aang-meets-European-in-a-tracksuit outfit because he’s calm and tries not to do much drama, but is condescending. Renn is of West Asian/American/Tarandran descent.

Then we have Public Universal Friend (PUF) 2 with the twists. I figure it doesn’t want a lot of hair to take care of, and this style keeps it out of its face. Same clothes as the other PUF. It is kneeling, with one leg propped up. It is of coastal Southern East African descent.

*Then laying on the ground is Tal. Ke is looking at kes tablet because ke doesn’t like focusing on other things. Tal is unfortunately at the wrong angle to show off ke’s face tattoo. Small afro kept stylishly kept, along with some garters and a short skirt. Ke is laying down because ke feels like it. Ke is of West African/American/Texan descent.

*Then we have Aspen, the POV character, smack dab in the middle. Canonically, they’d don’t have a headband as far as we know, but I think their hair looks nice pushed up like that. They are wearing a jumpsuit like last time, but this time has a belt for flair, because Tal and Sunset convinced them. Aspen sits cross cross because they can and it’s a common sitting posture in Arborea. They are of West African/American/Arborea Atlantican descent.

Lina is kneeling like PUF2, but facing the other way. I gave her buns and square jewelery because I based her off of a Hopi woman’s ’do that I really liked, and Lina can be short for names like Catalina. She has freckles because they’re fun. She’s gained some muscle and weight since the last picture, which is great! She is of Hopi/Latin American descent.

Last is Sunset. She is a zeelite, a subculture interested in replicating and investigating pre-Neocambrian (aka our time) cultures. She is largely inspired by what she knows of punk, pastel goths, drag, and to be honest, Barbie (2023). She is voguing because she knows and appreciates the importance of looking good. Sunset is of Central African/of Sirius descent.

Now for the top row, left to right again!

First, we have Heli. She wears functional but pretty clothes because she appreciates utility but always wants to show off what she’s got. The newest addition to the crew, she’s a little spiky, but has a soft spot for Adin. She was inspired by a picture of a Sistergirl from Australia (my headcanon, I only saw a picture of her and was unable to find more specific information). Heli is of Indigenous Australian descent.

*Next, we have Adin. I keep forgetting to draw him with tattoos, so I added a neck one last minute. His look has probably changed the most - his canon picture came out only a few months ago, so I drew him differently the first time. Adin cooks a lot, so he doesn’t try to wear anything or have a hairdo that could be ruined by cooking. Adin is of West African/Arborea Atlantican/American/Texan descent.

*Next up, the tallest of the bunch (and I forgot to draw his left arm until last minute, we have Denish! He’s doing the Arnold Schwarzenegger pose. The gentle Giant of the group, I was unable to recapture his face quite the same way as last time, but I still think he turned out well. He’s one of my favorite space pirates. I think he wears high collars to hide Tinera’s hickeys. Denish is of West African/American/Texan descent.

Right in front of Denish is PUF 1, AKA Dr. PUF. Still has tousled hair, still has the same robe. PUF is kneeling. It is of European descent.

*Hanging off of Denish is Tinera! She’s changed also, as her official looks came out, though I think I’ve kept her pretty nice looking still! I forgot to give her glasses though :(. I gave her Garnet (Steven Universe) finger gloves because they look cool. Tinera is of Central African/Lunarian descent.

Under Tinera is Sam. He’s partly visually inspired by the Dad of some kids I watch, and Ballister from Nimona. He likes to gaze at the stars and wonder about all the stories that will be told about them. Sam is of South Asian descent.

*Lastly is Keldin (AKA Captain Sands). He’s always dressed well and keeps his hair well-coifed. Hardly anyone from the ‘first’ crew likes him. He is standing awkwardly farther away because he knows everyone near him isn’t his tan. Keldin is of West African/American/Trandran descent.

[littlefoxwithadagger]

Zee's 2023 Reads

Stats:

Books read ˋ°•*⁀➷ 62

Books DNFed ˋ°•*⁀➷ 9

Five-star reads ˋ°•*⁀➷ 23

Note: ☆ counts as a half star, since there isn’t a half star emoji

I tried not to tag any books I didn’t like because I don’t like to hate on books in their fandom tags, so if I accidentally tagged something I have a bad review, please tell me 😭

This list is chaos and I defintely ripped into some of these books because I hated them. Be warned. (I’m sorry ACOTAR fans. Maybe don’t read this if that’s your favorite book series. I didn’t hate them, but I certainly had quite a few criticisms.)

Also, if you see the reviews start to get way longer in October, that’s because I started this post in October, so everything I read after that was reviewed immediately after reading.

↳ March (2)

Red Queen - Victoria Aveyard

March 3rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️

I read this by request of my aunt (it's her favorite book series) and honestly it was just kinda boring and not my taste...not to mention the ending REALLY pissed me off. The whole powers thing was kinda cool, but the dystopian main plot was kind of generic? Which is fine, but this was kind of bland for a first book. Will not be finishing the series.

Glass Sword - Victoria Aveyard

March 10th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

This is the sequel to Red Queen, and frankly I think I read about three chapters of it before I DNFed. The main reason I DNFed this was because of the ending of the first book. I won’t go into detail about it because it spoils the end of the first book, but after my favorite character was taken away from me, I couldn’t finish this series.

Overall, I think this series had great potential but bad execution. I may try to read it again in the new year just to give the entire series a proper, full review, but at the time that I read this, I wasn’t into reading much at all and therefore couldn’t read a book just to say I’d read it.

↳ May (7)

Les Misérables - Victor Hugo

May 5th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

By far my favorite classic thanks to my mom encouraging me to read it. Loads of beautiful prose and a compelling plot line. I especially liked how he wove a bunch of stories that seemed not at all connected into one. Jean Valjean was a very complicated character, and I enjoyed following his story as it progressed. It felt very full-circle, even if the ending was a bit sad. The author took us all over France, and I felt very immersed in the world even though there was no visual for it. I also appreciated seeing the side characters grow over the length of the story. There were quite a few side characters who got a full arc despite not needing it. I'll probably reread this someday, just not now.

Flip the Script - Lyla Lee

May 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is a cute sapphic love story between two teenage actresses starring together in a Korean drama. Fun fact - I didn't realize it was sapphic for a good while and was confused why sexuality was a hot topic in the book. Whoops! Cute anyways, and the plotline kept me interested.

The Selection - Kiera Cass

May 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This was my first reread of the year! I read this book back in 2021 originally by request of a friend. Rereading it was a bit of a let-down. I found the main girl annoying at times and overall the plot just kinda felt...meh. I will say that I was a bit disappointed that Maxon was the main guy at first because I really loved Aspen, but I think Maxon grew on me quite a bit more towards the end of this book. It was also easier for me to love him on the reread because I’d followed the full story already, so I think I appreciated his character more on this read than I did on the first read. I'm also not huge into dystopian, so that did kill my enjoyment of this a bit.

The Elite - Kiera Cass

May 27th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

To continue my Selection reread, I read this. This book was better than the first one, though some of it was just very boring if I'm remembering correctly. It was nice to have a smaller group of girls and get to see them getting to know each other better, and this alone made the book more enjoyable than the last. I think the political tension upped a bit in this book, which I didn’t really like, but it did lead to quite a few great scenes between America and Maxon.

The One - Kiera Cass

May 28th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

To complete the Selection reread, I read this. This was by far the best book in the trilogy. It was fun and full of action, and Maxon and America finally got themselves together. There was a great love confession from Maxon at the very end which will forever have my heart. Five stars just for making me swoon honestly. There were a few things that frustrated me in this book, such as the fact that America and Maxon still didn’t seem to trust each other for a lot of this book, but that’s their problem, not mine. I definitely enjoyed the scene where America saw Maxon’s scars for the first time. It was a very sweet scene, and I love emotional vulnerability between characters. 💔

Honorable mention - The Heir - Kiera Cass

May 29th, ⭐️⭐️, DNF

This book sucked to put it frankly. I recall enjoying it the first time I read it, but upon reread I found the main character entirely unbearable (making America look like a saint) and I think I made it about ten pages before deciding it wasn't worth the reread. I wish I didn't own this book.

The Love Hypothesis - Ali Hazelwood

May 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This book was what really got me back into reading, and I'd been wanting to read it for months after hearing about it all over the internet. I gave it four stars at the time because I cringed a bit at the number of times the main girl referred to the main guy as "big" or something of the sort but overall found it enjoyable. Honestly, I'd probably rate this lower if I re-read it, but I'm not going to bother testing that theory. It got me back into picking up books, and that's what matters.

↳ June (9)

A Court of Thorns and Roses - Sarah J. Maas

June 10th, ⭐️⭐️☆, DNF

This book...was disappointing. This was the first book I bought from the store without reading it first because the internet had me so convinced I'd enjoy it. I didn't. I found myself so bored I didn't bother reading past page 100 before I returned the book to the store. I don't really have much to say about it other than it was boring, honestly. Feyre also annoyed me a decent bit.

The Romantics - Leah Konen

June 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

This book had the same problem as ACOTAR, only far worse. This book felt like it had absolutely no substance, and I read at least half of it. The entire book was narrated by the entity of Love, and all of the characters we got introduced to were only ever surface-level. I felt like I was watching a bunch of strangers interact with each other. Perhaps it was just that young teenage romance isn’t really my cup of tea, but I found the plot entirely uninteresting.

Once Upon a Broken Heart - Stephanie Garber

June 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

My babyyyyyyyyyy <3 My bread and butter, the reason I got into fantasy books. Definitely not as compelling as the second book, but compelling nonetheless. Jacks and Evangeline have insane tension and it was overall just great. I absolutely loved the whole kisses deal, though I’ll admit this book was NOT what I thought it was. When I picked it up, I was expecting Jacks to be an actual prince, and I was quite surprised to find that he was more of a demigod. Either way, it was a great book, and if you love romantacy, I’d recommend this for SURELY. (I’m biased, can’t you tell? This is a OUBAH blog, after all.)

The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber

June 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'd give this book six stars if I could. This entire book was just pining and drama, and I live for it. Not to mention...the Hollow? Yes. Yes, yes yes. Everything about this book, yes. The curses in this book were completely crazy, and I felt like we got a lot more world building in this book. The entire world felt a lot more complete in this book, and we really got to start to piece together Jacks’s backstory. Lovely.

One True Loves - Elise Bryant

June 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm pretty sure I actually read this book last year, but it got put into my book tracker in July so I'm leaving it here. This was a cutsey little romance about a girl who goes on a cruise in Europe. I don't remember much about it, but I remember loving the two main characters and the realtionship they had with each other.

Happily Ever Afters - Elise Bryant

June 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Pretty sure this is the book before One True Loves? They're in the same series, I know that. This was a cutsey little book about a baker guy and a writer girl who ended up at the same high school. Absolutely loved the character growth the main character had over the course of the book.

In Order to Live - Yeonmi Park

June 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was a biography written by a woman who escaped North Korea. It was truly an amazing read, and this is the one book I cried while reading this year! I would definitely recommend this to anyone because it is extremely informative while also being very immersive.

Caraval - Stephanie Garber

June 27th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Back to Stephaine Garber! Honestly, I started reading this series for Jacks, but the first book is something entirely on its own. I absolutely loved Julian and Scarlett, and I'll be rereading this again soon. The book very much immersed the reader, and I felt like I was a player in Caraval myself. There was so much fun to be had in this book, and honestly it could just be read as a stand-alone.

Legendary - Stephanie Garber

June 31st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I drove all the way to the other side of town to get this book, that's how good the first one was. This book was less enjoyable than the first, but the plot was extremely compelling. Sadly, I’m not a huge fan of Tella, so I struggled to immerse myself in this book the way I got immersed in Caraval.

↳ July (11)

(Was I ok in July? How many books is this, Zee?)

Finale - Stephanie Garber

July 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Jacks. That's about all I have to say about this book.

Sugar, Spice, and Can’t Play Nice - Annika Sharma

July 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Not sure why, but I decided to dump $16? $17? on this when I went to Barnes and Noble with a friend, so I had to finish it. There was a tad too much sexual tension and not enough romance between the main characters for my taste, but it was a good book. I especially enjoyed that the author did so much with her own culture in the book. Both of the characters learned the importance of truly connecting with someone over the course of the book, and I thought it was lovely.

The Spanish Love Deception - Elena Armas

July 2nd, ⭐️⭐️, DNF

This book was...something. I - yet again - purchased a book without reading it first. Learned my lesson this time. I have honestly no idea what this book is about because I read only fifty pages of it and there was...too much of her referring to him as "big" and "tall". I get it. He's tall and wide. Can we please discuss why you hate him? I'd love to know, really. Perhaps this book is for you if you like extreme sexualization of tall, buff men, but it’s not for me.

The Inheritance Games - Jennifer Lynn Barnes

July 6th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Queen. Puzzles and drama galore, and I love the boys. That's really all I have to say about this. I LOVE puzzles so this book was a big hit with me. Avery is a little genius and I appreciate it, and I also loved getting to see her adapt to her new life.

The Cruel Prince - Holly Black

July 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This read is courtesy of my bestie. She had not finished the series when she recommended it. Still hasn't. (Nani, this is a plea for you to finish it.) I don't recall much of the book, honestly, but the plot was good enough for me to rate it four and a half stars, so...?

The Wicked King - Holly Black

July 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

Cardan and Jude...on the couch...with- ahem. I mean what. What was this book about? Also I love the way Cardan speaks. He’s very formally-spoken and I love that for him.

The Queen of Nothing - Holly Black

July 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

yESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. This entire book. The ENDING??? Insane. How do I not remember any of the plot of these books besides the end of this one? We'll never know.

Skin of the Sea - Natasha Bowen

July 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆, DNF

This book was probably pretty great. I personally found the introduction to the plot a bit dragging and it lost my interest because of this, but it sounded like it would eventually be a good and intriguing plot. I may eventually pick this back up, but currently there are other books I am actually excited to read, so for now this will be only a DNF.

These Violent Delights - Chloe Gong

July 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

Ahem...this was actually a great book, despite the DNF and star rating. I DNFed this book because it was too gorey, but I'm currently attempting to finish it. The writing is beautiful and the characters are very compelling. The tension between the main characters is lovely. I'm hoping to give this five stars when I finally finish it.

Six of Crows - Leigh Bardugo

July 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Delicious. A heist, six morally grey characters, lots of fighting and tension - both romantic and plot-wise. Absolutely ate up the characters' backstories. I love a good trauamtic backstory. I was reading fanfics about this book before I even finished reading it, that's how good the character building was. (Sadly I got a ton of the plot spoiled for me between this book and the next because I decided to join the online fandom before finishing the books. I will NOT make that mistake again.)

How the King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories - Holly Black

July 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

A goofy short read about Cardan. I love him. That's it.

(Zee said no reading during birthday month apparently? Was I spending too much time being lovesick over my coworker? We'll never know.)

↳ September (6)

The Forgetting - Sharon Cameron

September 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book surprised me. I had no idea what it was about going into it, and I was entirely surprised. Apparently it's dystopian? Sci-fi? Who knew? (not me) Anyways, I loved the two main characters, and the plot was extremely creative. This is definitely going to be a re-read next year. Sadly, the sequel was not about this pair of characters, so I didn’t end up reading it.

Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros

September 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Well, this is a funny story. I put in a request at the library for this book in July, having about zero clue what it was about beyond dragons. I was intrigued, of course, because I LOVE dragons. By the time I got my hands on the book, I'd heard many reviews about how awful the book was. I was convinced I'd hate it, but of course, I had to read it because I waited TWO MONTHS for it. It took a few pages for me to be interested, but it was a VERY good book. I love Xaden. I will kiss him on the head. This got four stars because those smut scenes GAGGED me (and not in a good way), but I have since read worse smut, so perhaps this will be a five-star someday. The smut was truly something, though. I sat on the couch and sobbed from laughter while reading them.

The Stolen Heir - Holly Black

September 16th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was...gorey, honestly. But other than that, a great read. Both main characters are very compelling, and I adore Oak. Sweetest boy. I can't wait to read the second book. It really took us a lot farther into the world of Elfhame, and I appreciated the book for that.

Lightlark - Alex Aster

September 16th, ☆, DNF

I truly wish I could just say "No." and move on with this list, but this book was probably the worst book I've ever read. I read three pages and was so extremely confused that I couldn't continue. To confuse me that awfully in the first three pages of a book is a feat, I'll give her that. I would not recommend this book to anyone, and generally I believe that everything has an audience. I'm sorry if you're a fan of this book, but I just...can't.

Fireworks - Alice Lin

September 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Cute book about a girl and her childhood best friend turned Kpop star when they finally reunite at age 18. Soooo much romantic tension, and I loved how the book dealt with mental health. I hope these two live happily ever after.

Reread - Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros

September 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Yes, I reread it a week after I read it. Sue me. It was a good book. I’ll be rereading it again when my holiday edition shows up.

↳ October (8)

Imogen, Obviously - Becky Albertalli

October 5th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is going on the list of cutesy sapphic books that make me cry. Absolutely loved the way the realtionship between the two main characters developed, and I thought it did a good job about commenting on what it means to be queer. Also, arguably the best college friend group ever in this book. I'm jealous.

When You Wish Upon a Lantern - Gloria Chao

October 6th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was ok. It was cute, but I found it slightly boring. I will say it was very good for a first-person dual POV book, which I usually hate and refuse to read.

Assistant to the Villain - Hannah Nicole Maehrer

October 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was a funny read, because I expected to hate read it, but it had me kicking and screaming, especially the ending. I was so insanely upset when I realized it was a trilogy (mostly because the ending was absolutely jarring and I didn’t expect it to end on a cliffhanger), but at the same time I'm glad this isn't the last we'll see of these characters. I love books where the villains are villains because they felt like that was all they could be. I love. Beyond all of this, I simply enjoyed to see all the characters interact with each other, and I felt like the author did a good job of humanizing all the characters. Not to mention Kingsley. He’s arguably my favorite character despite having no real lines in the book.

The Hawthorne Legacy - Jennifer Lynn Barnes

October 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Puzzles, Hawthorne boys, and...strip bowling (I forgot about this scene until a coworker told me she didn't read the book because there was stripping in it. I laughed.) Anyways I loved Jameson and Avery in this book and that's about all I have to say.

The Final Gambit - Jennifer Lynn Barnes

October 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok I’m going to be completely honest this book was one huge blur and it almost felt disconnected from the rest of the series. Don’t get me wrong, it was GREAT, but it was like complete whiplash while simultaneously tying up all the loose ends we had in the last two books. Also *spoilers* but JamesonAvery endgame YAYYYYYY.

Reread - Once Upon a Broken Heart - Stephanie Garber

October 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I reread this in preparation for the third book and it took me a month to read. Idk man.

Reread - The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber

October 23rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Good soup. Send me to the Hollow, please.

A Curse for True Love - Stephanie Garber

October 24th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

*ahem* drum roll please… 🥁🥁🥁 …LOVELY!! Evajacks kiss. This is all I wanted. Also his dimples. And Archer. And- Ok enough about that. To actually review this book, I think it was a great wrap-up of the series. The book had an amazing vibe, and I loved how the first half of the book felt shrouded in mystery since we spent the majority of the time in Evangeline’s head. I read this entire book in one five-hour sitting, completely skipping all the homework I had to do that night just so I could read this IMMEDIATELY. It was totally worth it. I also just loved seeing Jacks as the tortured man I always knew he was. Yes bby be so tortured. Now kiss.

↳ November (8)

A Court of Mist and Fury - Sarah J. Maas

November 3rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was...a book. It had potential to be a great book in the first 100 pages, but somewhere along the way it got kind of insane. Honestly, I feel like it should've been two books. It was over 600 pages and yet I found most of the scenes were a bit too short. Also, there were too many location changes, and this book is where the bad smut truly is. I couldn't even read the smut scenes...I can usually tolerate them. (Is it clear I don't like smut?). The first half of the book set up this lovely dynamic between Rhys and Feyre that I loved and showed me this new, fun world of the Night Court. I only wish that I’d enjoyed the second half of the book as much as I did the first. The second half didn’t get enough development and kind of just all ran together, which sucked. I would’ve given this four stars if the second half had had better pacing.

Honorable mention - The Queen of Nothing - Holly Black

November 8th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

*cough* *cough* ahem. I reread like half this book for the scenes between Cardan and Jude…especially a specific scene in chapter 21 (if you know you know) and also the ending <3 yes queen get your ma-

Iron Flame - Rebecca Yarros

November 12th , ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

(I just finished this book right before I started typing this so excuse my screaming) BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR. HANDS DOWN. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING ENDING AND I LOVE YOU REBECCA YARROS. If you like fantasy, I’d recommend this book. (Also rep for the messed up joints girlies 🙏🏼) I love Xaden and Violet sm.

These Violent Delights - Chloe Gong

November 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This book was very good. Great prose, amazing characters, original plot. I only didn’t give it five stars because I personally felt just a bit disconnected from the story. I didn’t really feel all that stressed by the plot, though this may have been because I only had four hours to read the book. Overall, it was a great book and I’ll be reading the sequel when I have time. (Also, coming off the Iron Flame high does make this book a bit less fascinating.)

Crooked Kingdom - Leigh Bardugo

November 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

After four months, I finally bring myself to finish this. A masterpiece. I didn’t want to leave this world, and yet I finally had to. The entire crew has my heart, and that ending broke me. I wanted so badly to simply not read it and make sure it didn’t happen, but here we are. Our gang all got their not-quite-happily-ever-after, and this may or may not have been the only book to make me cry ever. (That’s not true, but I can’t remember which other book I cried at. Perhaps it was my own.) Five stars. I will be returning to this duology someday to reabsorb the masterpiece that it is.

Drizzle, Dreams, and Lovestruck Things - Maya Prasad

November 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This book was pretty good. The sisters had a cute relationship and the inn was fun. The book was split into four parts - one for each sister - and personally I enjoyed the first two the best. The third one was also pretty cute, but the last one…I didn’t connect with the character as well, and her plot seemed to drag. I actually stopped reading like 3 pages before the end because the plot was basically over like 20 pages before and it was just focusing on side characters. I think I’m just not a huge fan of slice of life in book form, so if you like that, then this book is for you. I have the sequel sitting on my shelf, but I might just take it back to the library at this point.

A Court of Wings and Ruin - Sarah J. Maas

November 23rd, ⭐️⭐️

This book was way too long, to put it bluntly. I considered DNFing it a number of times, and the plot just seemed to drag on. I don’t understand what Maas has against question marks, either. I can’t tell you how many times I read a question in here that ended with a period. I’m not sure whether it was supposed to emphasize tone or what she was trying to do, but it was extremely irritating and distracting. I didn’t notice this happening in the other two books, but maybe I just missed it. The only reason I finished this book was so that I could read ACOSF with full context because I do love Cassian and Nesta, but otherwise I probably would’ve DNFed about 2/3 of the way in. The fandom wasn’t kidding when they said ACOMAF was the best book in the series. I’m only glad I finished this because of the Nessian scene we got at the end 💔 my heart cried.

A Court of Silver Flames - Sarah J. Maas

November 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

To my surprise and delight, this book has question marks!!! Yayyy!!! To start this review off, I’ll begin by saying - Sarah finally got a decent review out of me. I really enjoyed this book except for a few small details. Now, that may just be because I love Cassian and Nesta, but I consider it a win that she wrote two characters that I LOVE.

That being said, this book made me dislike Rhysand even more than I already did. I’m not sure what it is about him, but I find him a bit intolerable. I won’t dwell on this point, but I found him especially irritating in relation to the Feyre B-plot. Oof. That in combination with the ridiculous number of smut scenes made me knock this down a star. I was fine with them at first, but then it just became too much. Google says there were only 7 smut scenes in the book, but I swear there were more. This is just a personal gripe and nothing against the book or its readers, but it certainly downgraded my enjoyment of it.

Beyond that, I really loved the tension between Cassian and Nesta, and I also enjoyed seeing the two of them work through their issues. They’re extremely sweet and I love them. One thing though - Sarah, why did you tease a mating ceremony for like three pages and then we don’t even get to see it??? Miss ma’am at the very least I wanted to see Cassian being all sweet as they consummated the mating or whatever. But instead we get another scene of someone crying over Feyre’s painting??? COME ON!!! This will probably be the only time I’ll rate an SJM book over 3 stars.

↳ December (11)

The Brothers Hawthorne - Jennifer Lynn Barnes

December 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

To start this off, I was completely thrilled to read a book about the boys. Don’t get me wrong, I love Avery, but the three youngest Hawthorne brothers have always piqued my interest more. I honestly didn’t think a book in this series could be better than the others, but there was something about this book that was even more incredible than the trilogy. This book was even better than I thought it would be. I expected to enjoy Jameson’s part of the story even more than Grayson’s part, but I actually found myself enjoying getting to know Grayson quite a bit more. (Don’t get me wrong, I loved Jameson’s part of the story, but this book made me love Gray a lot more.). I’d give this book six stars if I could. Absolutely lovely and completely compelling read, and I love all the new characters we’re introduced to. I do hope that someday we get a book about Xander and Nash, but for now, this will quench my Hawthorne thirst. I definitely have a new favorite Hawthorne though (sorry Jameson). I will kiss Gray-

The Half-Life of Love - Brianna Bourne

December 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Uh so to put it simply. I hated this book (in the best way possible). I don’t know why I read this. I knew how it would end from the start, but it intrigued me enough that I read it anyways!!?? Haha. I sobbed at the ending. I never want to think about this book again. I loved the characters but I hated the plot. That’s it. (I will also say this book dealt HEAVILY with death and was very heavy so. Yeah. Be warned.) Update after a week of processing: I actually loved this book a lot, but it broke my heart. I loved the character development that Flint went through over the course of the book, and it absolutely broke me that that was the end. I may change my star rating for this before I officially post this, but for now it stays at 3 for hurting me.

Fireborne - Rosaria Munda

December 16th, ⭐️⭐️☆, DNF

This book was…odd, to say the least. It had potential, but something about the world building felt off to me. Perhaps it’s just not my vibe. My main gripe with it has to be the characters’ names. Some of them had very modern names, some of them had very old names, and some of them only went by extremely weird nicknames. The names alone took me out of the immersion of the world, because every time I’d finally get into it, I’d read a name and go oh, yeah, this is a book. It took me about a week to decide to DNF this, but after reading so many books I genuinely enjoyed, I just couldn’t force myself to finish it.

Greymist Fair - Francesca Zappia

December 16th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This was one of my most anticipated reads of the season. I saw the cover at the library and was like oh, yeah, that’ll be a good read. I didn’t even read the summary. Turns out, I was so right. The book kind of has similar vibes to the tales of The Brothers Grimm, but oddly I didn’t find any of this story very creepy. It was dark and a bit gory, but I thoroughly enjoyed the progression of the story. I wouldn’t say this was a five-star read, but I really enjoyed this book. It’s a collection of stories about Greymist Fair that weave together very beautifully, and I absolutely love the atmosphere this book created. Come to find out after I read it, it’s classified as a horror book? I would’ve probably said it was more paranormal fiction, but alas. This was not a horror book to me. I should know, I hate horror. Would definitely recommend this book to anyone who likes morally twisted fantasy books - especially classic fae stories. This book gave me similar vibes to those.

The Matzah Ball - Jean Meltzer

December 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This book was so much fun. I think I read it in 3.5 hours. I wasn’t sure what to expect going into this, because honestly it’s one of the four Christmas (this book wasn’t technically Christmas but based on certain themes I think you could categorize it that way) books I impulsively rented from the library, but I loved it. The main girl had a chronic illness, and as someone who struggles physically myself, I really enjoyed reading about a main character going through the mental struggles of such a thing. This book gave silly Hallmark movie vibes, but it was completely enjoyable. The main guy was extremely sweet albeit a bumbling idiot, and I actually didn’t mind the major misunderstanding trope that carried this plot. I also really enjoyed reading a book that included lots of Jewish culture. It felt like home. There were a few aspects of this book I found a bit childish for a book about two people who were nearly thirty, but I guess different people enjoy different things. It was a fun, quick read if you’re looking for something with a holiday theme.

These Hollow Vows - Lexi Ryan

December 23rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

I’m not really sure why, but I started reading this in October and couldn’t get into it. A couple pages in and I was HOOKED. I love me a book about Fae realms. (At least, the original Fae. ACOTAR was too far from the source material for me to enjoy it, sadly.) This book has all the mystery and wonder of the Fae lands while being extremely simple to read and understand. I LOVED the plot progression, and the plot twists were predictable in a roundabout way where you could sort of guess them, but they still surprised you. The ending made me scream in both an angry and excited way. I totally saw the ending coming, but it still pissed me off!

I can’t wait to read the next book, but sadly I must wait until I return from vacation. I would DEFINITELY recommend this if you like fae books, especially if you enjoyed The Cruel Prince. The only reason I didn’t give this book five stars is that I felt the side characters were all a bit underdeveloped. I’m not sure if this was on purpose since the book is from the main character’s point of view, but I felt like I didn’t even know the love interests well enough to actually make a good judgement of either of them. I did, according to the ending, end up pegging both of their true characters correctly, but I still felt they were underdeveloped for how much time they spent in the book.

Honorable mention - The Queen of the Tearling - Erika Johansen

December 24rd, unrated, DNF

I tried to read this book about ten different times before I had to return it to the library, but it just isn’t my cup of tea. It didn’t capture my attention in the twenty pages I read, and I don’t think I can follow the character on her journey. It’s very sad, because I truly love a learned royalty plot, but I couldn’t do it. Perhaps I will pick it up again someday, but I don’t plan on it being anytime in the near future.

Defy the Night - Brigid Kemmerer

December 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok, this one surprised me. I picked this book up at the library back in the summer, but I realized it was dual POV, and at that point I just couldn’t handle reading that, so I returned the book. I picked it up again on Christmas because my grandma bought me a kindle and I really wanted to try it, but the options at my library that were immediately available were limited. I’m so glad I gave it a second chance, because I loved it. This book had everything I love in a fantasy novel. There were so many twists I didn’t see coming, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. This book made me enjoy a wholly political plot, and I love that for it. Usually, I’m not a huge fan of political plots, but I loved the way this one developed. The romance was absolutely adorable as well, and it made me so happy I decided to give this book a second chance. As it stands, I will probably be reading the sequel tomorrow, and I am very excited, although I’m a bit upset the third book isn’t out until January! I was so happy to give another book five stars this month, because with how it was going, I didn’t think I would be.

Defend the Dawn - Brigid Kemmerer

December 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

Hah. This book. True to my word, I finished it the day after Defy the Night. I’ll be honest, this book was slightly disappointing after how amazing the first book was, but I’ll let it slide solely because we got to know a new and amazing character. Besides that, this book did BOUNDS of character work. We got to know more and more about our main characters, and they all learned to overcome their stubbornness in this book. One thing I really loved about this book is that we got to see more about how close the brothers are. I feel like I don’t read many books where boys are very close to each other, especially not in a royalty setting, so it was refreshing to read a book where two brothers rule the throne united instead of going to war over it.

I was a bit disappointed that they spent the majority of the book on a ship, but because of the development that happened in the ship both character-wise and plot-wise, I can’t necessarily complain. For one, we got away from Allisander in this book, and I really had no character in this book more than him (yet). I’m very excited to read the last book when it comes out, though I wish I could read it right now. This series is truly worth the hype it had when I first discovered it, and I can’t wait to see where the relationships go in the next book.

The Lost Sisters - Holly Black

December 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Truth be told, this was a whole lot shorter than I thought it would be. It was essentially a letter from Taryn to Jude about the events of the first book. I found it to be a very interesting character study, honestly, and it showed us a bit more about Cardan too. I would recommend reading this if you’ve read The Cruel Prince series.

These Twisted Bonds - Lexi Ryan

December 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Oh my gosh this book did more than I could’ve ever imagined it would. This book gave me all the character development the first book was lacking, and the way the plot developed was insanely amazing. I absolutely love Finn, and the way he calls Abriella Princess just absolutely melts me. The world got extremely fleshed out in this book, and I really enjoyed seeing how this author put her own twist on the world of the Fae. I also, oddly, really liked how the spice was done in this book. It was there but it mostly lacked detail and description, which is how I like my spice. I want a vague idea and nothing more! 😆 Overall, I really enjoyed this book, and it will probably be my last book of the year. I think it was a great conclusion to this year’s reading, and I’m glad I ended the year on a high note.

If you read this far, thanks for sticking around! For 2024, I will be doing monthly wrap-ups, so don’t expect another post like this…unless I decide to do a yearly wrap-up after my monthly ones are done…

If you have any recommendations to start my year off, tell me! I currently am planning on reading the Percy Jackson series, but that’s the only thing I’m really looking forward to reading

[smackthedevilwrites]

LET'S FALL IN LOVE AND DO NOTHING

Story four of the J2 Christmas Anthology 2023

Rating: Explicit

Chapters: 7

Word Count: 14,593

Self-proclaimed ‘North America’s Laziest Man’, Jensen Ackles has just quit his latest job. At the age of thirty-six, he suddenly realizes that it’s about time he made some changes to his life. After applying for a new position suggested by a friend, Jensen gets a job working as a house boy in Aspen over the Christmas holidays. All he has to do is cook the family meals, serve at the dinner table and not, under any circumstances, diddle the boss’s son.

J2 Christmas Anthology 2023 complete playlist on Spotify.

'Let's Fall in Love and Do Nothing songs -

Winter Wonderland - Blake Shelton

Where I Find My Heaven - Gigolo Aunts

[theadventurek9]

We are in Bryan Texas for the 2023 ASCA Nationals!

It's hot and humid but is supposed to get cold on Monday. Aayla got taken off Carprofen two days ago and is her normal self, no signs of pain! So we are going forward with the obedience and rally trial tomorrow and seeing where we go from there.

She has assimilated well into my friend's group of dogs. (five others, with minimal issues).

Take a peep at Aspen this blue merle, who holds the record for the most amount of OTCHs with ASCA. (He has OTCH13!!! He also has an AKC OTCH and an ASCA ATCH)

[mamirhodessxox]

Hey There Delilah (Part 11)

(This chapter is more so on the shorter end since I have a little bit of writers block right now for HTD but I promise part 12 will be more in depth!!)

Cody Rhodes x Fem OC!Reader

(Delilah Jones)

Storyline: Delilah was born and raised by the beach in L.A and grew up in a home where her parents expected her to go to Harvard & become a well known woman who marry’s a man who is a lawyer after high school. But that’s not what she wanted, She always wanted to own a boutique/flower shop & she did, once her parents discovered she wouldn’t attend college they left her to fend for herself but allowed her little sister Kinsley to visit or sleep over whenever, Her little sister always had an eye for WWE but Delilah never understood why but little did either of them know one of Delilah’s customers would become well acquainted. (Creds to @alyyaanna for helping me w the storyline)

Contents: Toxic parents, Angst, Fluff, Smut in later chapters, Based in May 2023, Alcohol, Violence, Corruption Kink, Size Kink, Daddy Kink, Crying Kink, Hand Kink, Praise Kink, Fingering, Smutty smut, Brief mention of Cockwarming.

🏷️ list: @alyyaanna @ginswife @coolpastelartshoe @greatkoalawizard @cokolin044 @kotoriarlert @alicerosejensen @bunnybot55 @agent-dessis-posts @adollonyourshelf @mini-rhodes @southerngirl41 @femdisa @harmshake

{~I'm very serious with you guys interacting with my writing!!!! it would make me so happy & excited, the more comments & reposts the more inspiration i have to write :) likes and comments are strongly appreciated so please COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT COMMEENNTTT the more comments the more content <3!!!~}

Cody had made sure to clear his schedule for the entirety of December & get everything over with in all of November as much as he possibly could. He went in and out of town for multiple WWE events and promos but once November was over he was a free man until at-least February. Delilah spent her free time running the shop & even hiring employees to keep the shop held down for the days she couldn’t be there & she was more than glad because she had just discovered Cody would be taking her & the friend group up to Aspen Colorado for the entirety of December.

For weeks on end they all prepared packed & planned things to put on the to do list. It had been a very busy November & once December rolled by the group was already in their rented out cabin in Aspen. This would be their 2nd day & absolutely none of them were prepared for the amount of snow they were seeing. Cody & Lilah were dead asleep in their bed for most of the morning wrapped up in each others embrace.

That was until Lilah & Cody started hearing clatter downstairs in the kitchen causing him to flop his arm over his face sighing out in frustration & then hearing Mira yell at seth “SHUT THE FUCK UP YOUR WAKING UP EVERYBODY!” Seth yelled back “YOUR WAKING UP EVERYBODY JUST AS MUCH AS I AM BY SCREAMING SHIT HEAD, YOU CAN’T EVEN MAKE WAFFLES PROPERLY.” “NEITHER CAN YOU DUMBASS?” Lilah groaned out in exhaustion but Cody immediately got out of bed & put his boxers on followed with pajama pants once he heard Seth scream after Mira threw a metal bowl at him. Cody hustled downstairs dragging the both of them out of the kitchen whispering “Both of you shut the fuck up it’s 5 in the fucking morning, Lilah is trying to sleep & your screaming like fucking children.” He scolded while Mira sat crossing her arms before he went back upstairs undressing himself and crawling back in bed huffing “Fucking morons.” He muttered against Delilah’s bare shoulder while she giggled before closing her eyes enjoying the moment.

Cody breathed into the crook of her neck before placing kisses against her shoulders “g’morning baby.” She smiled at his tired voice and rolled over to face him & lazily kiss him while his hands explored her body “Goodmorning handsome” he chuckled as her legs began to tangle themselves around his while she sighed out softly “Cody..?” She whined out and he hummed “Yes angel?” He asked quietly until he heard her whine in response & smirked again her skin “Already beautiful? You just woke up.” She sighed pawing at his back “Please..” he smiled and pressed his nose against her before giving in, He knew what she wanted & he was going to give her partially what she wanted since they were already exhausted from the previous night. “How about for now you cockwarm me and if you still need more I’ll give you what you really want later hm?” She smiled nodding in agreement but soon let out a soft moan the moment he seethed his cock inside of her, Cody groaned & caressed her hair “Better?”

She smiled nodding cupping his face into the palm of her hand while he held her close, this was all she needed, She didn’t want him to move or do anything else but be as close to her as he possibly could be, For the next few hours Cody noticed that every now and then he would gently push his hips against hers to keep her awake and would chuckle at how her body responded as he picked up his phone checking the time seeing that it aas already 8 in the morning “Sweetheart we gotta get up c’mon.” She re opened her eyes and nodded while he carefully pulled out of her & sat up staring out the window while she got out of bed and went to the bathroom quickly washing herself & putting on something warm & soon Cody did the same after she left the bedroom & smiling at Mira who was still downstairs “g’morning!” She chirped out while Mira waved back smiling “Sleep alright?” Delilah nodded as she made her way into the kitchen helping her best friend clean up “Slept so good actually & then I woke up to Seth screaming Mira chuckled nodding her head as Delilah washed the counters “Yeah we were trying to make waffles but we also don’t know shit about baking so..” Lilah smiled in amusement before pulling Cereal they bought on the way to the Cabin a few days ago from the Pantry “Don’t worry about it, I think Cody’s gonna have us keep today easy since it snowed so much over night so we’ll probably just end up messing around outside & go out to dinner.” Mira nodded “Thank god, I was hoping he wouldn’t make us do anything outrageous.” Cody walked into the kitchen pressing a kiss into Delilah’s head “You talkin’ about me in here?” She giggled shaking her head playfully as Mira smiled at their bond before pouring herself a bowl of cereal.

Lilah hummed running her fingers through his hair noticing it was around the time again for him to start re-bleaching his hair but she left that for him to decide. Cody pat her hip & let go while Randy had just woken up at made his way into the kitchen “Looks like someone poured coke all over Colorado.” Mira snickered to herself before walking out of the kitchen while Cody sighed putting on a coat “I need to take Pharaoh out there before he starts flipping his shit on me.” Lilah nodded as she ran her hand over his shoulder “You do that ‘m gonna go and to try wake up Kinsley.”

Cody smiled & whistled for Pharaoh to get off the couch & take him outside. Lilah snuck her way into Kinsleys room & quietly leaned against her bed & moved some hair out of her sisters face “Kiiiinsley.” She smiled softly hearing her sisters groan in protest “Kinsley c’monnn Cody reallyyy wants to go out and play in the snow with you, if you don’t he’ll cry and scream and huff and puff so you better get up.” She teased while Kinsley stuffed her head into a pillow “nnnooo..” “yyeeeesss get up.” Lilah giggled while climbing onto her sisters bed while her sister resisted getting up “Five more minutes oka-“ Randy suddenly ran in & threw snowballs at them causing Kinsley to screech & stuff herself under the blankets while Lilah laughed out trying to cover herself “RANDY!!”

He cackled in pure deviousness before running off out if the room while Kinsley finally got out of her bed & chased after him as her high pitched laugh soured throughout the cabin.

Throughout the day Cody & Lilah built a snowman with Kinsley, threw a few snowballs, teased pharaoh in the snow, watched a few Christmas movies. Seth stood in the kitchen around 5:30 pm before they all went out to dinner & watched Lilah & Cody play with Pharaoh outside for the 10th time today while Mira looked out the window with him. “Is he doing it tonight?” Seth questioned while turning over to Mira “He sure is. He found the proper ring for her, found the perfect place to do it tonight during dinner. It’s all set in stone.” Seth nodded at her response as he stared at the couple interacting with Kinsley “I’m glad he’s giving her a proper proposal, She really does deserve it. Delilah’s a good girl. She’s good for him.”

Mira smiled softly while watching her bestfriend laugh outside throwing a few snowballs before Cody called everyone out to the heated up car they were waiting on & made their way to the restaurant. They all sat together in a large booth sharing stories with each other laughing, Lilah noticed Seth wasn’t at the table after awhile & Cody told her not to worry about it saying ‘He was probably busy talking to becky’ to keep her distracted . Eventually they all finished their dinner & Cody grabbed Delilah’s hand delicately while taking her outside for a moment enjoying each others company while the group followed along subtly. “You cold?” Cody chuckled out while she laughed and shook her head while they stood in the balcony of the restaurant before he sighed heavily running his hand down her back before turning around while she grinned and kissed his cheek “I’m gonna be totally honest with you sweetheart, I’m having a fucking heart attack right now.” He joked softly while fiddling with his pocket with a smile as she laughed. Mira stood behind a pillar along with everyone else before randy tossed over a small box over to Cody while Lilah let out a tiny gasp “Oh cody..”

Mira teared up and became nervous for Cody despite her already knowing Lilah’s previous answer and what her current answer would be. Cody pinched his nose a bit and shook his head quickly as a way of telling himself to get it together. Lilah sniffled and let out a choked up laugh before noticing Seth had just arrived but with Pharaoh with him making her tear up even more before Cody got on his knee “I— I know I already asked you this question but- I wanted to give you a more proper proposal so just do me a favor and act like- I’m asking you for the first time again alright?” He laughed out nervously while she sniffled nodding her head. Jey wiped off a few tears from his face as he recorded the entire interaction while Cody cleared his throat “Angel I don’t think you realize how much I love you, After the day I ran to your story randomly for flowers & met you mid panic attack on which flowers to get my mother I knew immediately I had to make you my girl & I’ve never felt more privileged to pursue you into my life, I’m so grateful for you. I know I already asked you this but-” Cody sighed opening the little box which revealed the a ring with a Pink diamond shaped heart customized to fit her finger almost perfectly “Will you give me the honor of marrying me & become my wife?” Lilah let out a choked up cry before nodding vigorously & completely getting onto his level just to wrap herself around him and let out a shaky breath as he slipped the ring onto her finger while she dug her face into his suit crying “A million times Yes Cody!” He chuckled pressing a Kiss into her cheek before clearing his throat “Kinsley sweet heart can you come here?” Mira teared up and turned to Kinsley who was nervously chewing on the straw of her soda she brought with her before putting it down & walking over to the couple.

“Kinsley sweetheart, You’re the most awesomest kid I know, Your a complete badass & I want to ask you something alright?” She nodded meekly while Cody dug into his left pocket & pulled out a ring pop while Randy chuckled in the background “Will you give me the permission to make your beautiful sister & make you my sister in law?” Kinsley smiled in a shy manner & quietly hugged her soon to be brother in law and mumbling out a quiet “Yes.” He grinned from ear to ear and pat her back before Lilah turned around and noticed Pharaoh running over towards them & completely flopping his body against hers & licking her cheek while the group walked over to them in tears. Randy pulled Cody up as he tried hiding the fact he was crying “Y-You fucking pussy I know you’re crying” Cody joked while he wiped off his own eyes & pulled him into a hug while Jey & Seth hugged Lilah congratulating her before Mira shoved them all out of her way “I’m so happy for you Rosie.” Lilah smiled at the nickname Mira used to call her when they were in high-school before hugging her back.

Lilah crouched down & hugged pharaoh who was pawing at her leg for some attention. She ran her fingers through his fur as she pressed a cheek right against his snout as she celebrated the fact Cody proved to her that soulmates were infact real.

xtripleiiix’s Masterlist

[datshitrandom]

Darren Criss at the first annual WHITESPACE get together in Aspen | March, 2013 | 📸 via Shaun White 

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: Never Met a Duke Like You by Amalie Howard

4.25/5. Releases 11/14/2023.

Vibes: childhood best friends to enemies (Iite) to lovers, nerd in the streets freak in the sheets, actual factual social issues, and a very good cat/kitty joke.

This is a retelling of Clueless, which is a retelling of Emma, which in theory sounds very messy but ultimately worked out in a historical romcom I really liked. It touches on some serious problems of the time (heads up: a lot of discussion of asylums and their abuses) and there's a great chemistry between our leads. She's a flighty eye-catching popular type, he wants to hunt for dinosaur bones, and they haven't seen each other for years but have been building up to this since childhood. It's a good mix.

Quick Takes:

--I was honestly a little "why do we need this" when I first understood the concept. Yes, the previous book in the series, Always Be My Duchess, is a retelling of Pretty Woman, which is a retelling of My Fairy Lady (and MFL is a retelling of Pygmalion). But Emma is an Austen novel, and such a clear precursor to historical romance subgenre of today. I was a little worried about how that would work.

But here's the thing. Clueless is very much not a direct retelling of Emma, and you change a lot in the Emma/Knightley dynamic when you switch it up from a girl and her neighbor/friend who's like 17 years her senior and held her when she was a baby, to a girl and her somewhat older former stepbrother (no shade, Emma is my favorite Austen and I adore Clueless). If you like Cher and Josh, that's the sweet spot Vesper and Aspen hit. It's very much that sequence in The Swan Princess wherein Derek and Odette bug each other as kids, then realize as adults that they wanna bang it out--but with a bit more of a friendship slant. In the childhood days. When they're adults, there's an edge added by their years of separation and misunderstandings. And I'll admit, I eat a "childhood friends separated and reunited as adults" dynamic right up. If that's your itch, this book will definitely scratch it.

--Aspen is really into DINOSAURS, and I personally loved that angle. He was nerdy enough for me to call him a nerdy hero (and Vesper does love his glasses) but he wasn't a cliche nerdy hero. Yes, he loves to look at fossils and discourse over prehistoric creatures, but he's also confident, snarky, and quite prone to putting it down. Honestly, I arguably could've used more dinosaur content (though Howard definitely uses it at just the right moment).

--A big part of this book is mental illness and the absolutely horrible was in which it was addressed at this point in time. Aspen's father was confined to an asylum and abused in that asylum--exactly how that happened is a major point in the book. Additionally, its specter hangs over Aspen's head, his father's "diagnosis" (I hesitate to call it legitimate) a potential means through which his own committal could be justified. It's rough, dude.

And I will say, I suspect that some readers will be dissatisfied with the comeuppance the villain of this book receives. For me, it worked--because it was realistic, and because I really couldn't think of any way through which the issue could be resolved without taking away from Aspen and Vesper's relationship. The point of this story isn't really punishing the bad guy--it's making it so Aspen and Vesper can have a healthy relationship without this threat in the midst of it all.

As an added note, Vesper has ADHD, which isn't a massive part of the novel but does figure into her character and journey. I thought it was a nice touch--people with ADHD didn't just suddenly pop into existence in the twentieth century, and the rep is good to see.

--The thing I really liked about Aspen and Vesper's dynamic is that there really was this undercurrent of childlike... knowledge, and playfulness. They've changed a lot, and there are a lot of confused feelings between them; but you still get the sense that at one point, these people really knew each other. And that sense of knowing and affection remains.

I also really loved the moments when the childhood besties jumped out--there's a teasing vibe to the relationship, this sense that they kind of want to kiss each other and kind of want to poke each other (non-sexually). It makes the tone of the book a bit bubblier, which is key, I think, when you're dealing with subject matter as dark as Aspen's backstory could be.

The Sex:

It's hot. These two have a very clear physical connection, and it's immediately noticeable. You get a lot of double entendres in this book, a lot of teasing that goes just over the line--like when Aspen casually tells Vesper she looks like she's just had an orgasm in public. Very normal thing to say to the former childhood friend you're not interested in! At all!

One sex scene in particular was so delightful--the perfect mixture of hot and funny, which sums up the tone of the book pretty well. I mean, this dude is really about his fossils, and they definitely play into the... plot. More than you might think. (Not in that way, in THAT way. Don't worry about it. Read the book.)

Frothy yet not without substance, Never Met a Duke Like You is another enjoyable entry from Amalie Howard. If I'm being real, I think I liked it a bit more than Always Be My Duchess (also a good book). Would recommend!

Thanks to Netgalley and Forever for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[blackwood4stucky]

maybe we’re just born with stardust in our blood | aspen blackwood

james “bucky” barnes x steve rogers | mcu

masterpost | 🅼 | word count: 4,330 | complete

tags: ws!witch!bucky, bucky barnes centric, ws!steve

synopsis: Team Cap search for the one thing that could send Bucky back to where he started.

ch. 2: i'll use you as a focal point, so i don't lose sight of what i want

bingo fills + event prompts

@anyfandomgoesbingo | idiots to lovers

buckybarnesevents: babb 2023 | crackfic [nov monthly prompt]

@buckybarnesevents: bucky’s birthday bash

wakanda bucky + friends to lovers + steve rogers + blue

febuwhump | day 16: came back wrong

@julybreakbingo: post-july | “innocently” groping someone else

@killacharacterbingo | gunshot

@multifandom-flash

halloween [5037] | screams like a little girl round 3 [3013] | flirting under fire taboo [6049] | culture: talking about sex

@seasonaldelightsbingo: types of love bingo | pressing their foreheads together

@slumberpartybingo | would you rather: live in the big city or quiet countryside

@stuckybingo [5080] | music + aquamarine [march prompt]

@stuckygeekevents: stucky geek bingo | cold stare, mourning

stucky smut menu | shy!bucky

sweetspicybingo: sweetheart bingo | just the tip

the-slumberparty: eight types of love | eros: dirty talk

read: ao3 | ffn | sqwa

ch 1

[aspenonpawzzz]

ASPEN, ASPEN. DID YOU JUST HAVE A FRIEND COME OUT AS TRANS MASC TOO YOU OVER A GOOGLE MEET AT 7:03 PM ON MAT 10TH 2023? IF SO, WE KNOW EACHOTHER IRL

nope! I only have my dad (yes I have one 😱🤯) and my mom on goggle meet.

sorry, but that would be so cool if we knew each other irl

[misfitwashere]

Friends,

Shortly after the apparent second assassination attempt against Trump, Elon Musk responded in a now deleted post: “And no one is even trying to assassinate Biden/Kamala 🤔 ????” 

Musk later said his post was intended as a joke. But it could be interpreted as a call to murder Biden and Harris — at least by one of the 198 million followers of Musk who initially received it. Presumably this is why the Secret Service is investigating it.

Under 18 U.S. Code Section 871, threatening a president or vice president or inciting someone to harm them is a felony that can result in a large fine and up to five years in prison. 

Yet even as Musk posted a potential death threat against the sitting commander-in-chief, his multiple defense contracts with the U.S. government have given him access to highly sensitive information. 

Reportedly, Musk has been given security clearance notwithstanding his admitted use of drugs (Musk says he has submitted to random drug testing at the request of the government), including smoking weed in public and using ketamine (for which he claims to have a prescription).

Quite apart from the drugs, when was the last time the U.S. government gave access to sensitive national security information to someone who posted a potential death threat against the president and vice president, even if he later called it a joke? 

Underlying this is a broader question: When in history has one unelected individual held such sway over American national security? 

Musk’s SpaceX has nearly total control of the world’s satellite internet through its Starlink unit. With little regulation or oversight, Musk has already put more than 4,500 Starlink satellites into orbit around the globe, accounting for more than half of all active satellites. Musk plans to have as many as 42,000satellites in orbit in coming years. 

Space X and its Starlink system have become strategically critical to American security. Starlink is providing connectivity to the U.S. Navy. The U.S. Space Force signed a $70 million contract late last year to provide it with military-grade low-earth-orbit satellite capabilities. According to Reuters, the National Reconnaissance Office, which oversees U.S. spy satellites, has a $1.8 billion contract with SpaceX. 

This gives Musk — the richest person in the world — remarkable power. Single-handedly, he can decide to shut down a country’s access to Starlink and the internet. He also can also gain access to sensitive information gathered by Starlink. “Between, Tesla, Starlink & Twitter, I may have more real-time global economic data in one head than anyone ever,” Musk tweetedin April 2023. 

Meanwhile, NASA has increasingly outsourced spaceflight projects to SpaceX, including billions in contracts for multiple moon trips and $843 million to build a vehicle that will take the International Space Station out of commission.

Conflicts of interest between Musk’s ventures around the world and U.S. national security abound, and they are multiplying.

When Putin attacked Ukraine, Musk and SpaceX’s Starlink provided Ukraine with internet access, enabling the country to plan attacks and defend itself. (This was not a charitable move by Musk; most of the 20,000 terminals in the country were funded by outside sources such as the U.S. government, the United Kingdom, and Poland). 

But in the fall of 2022, when Ukraine entered territory contested by Russia, Musk and Space X abruptly severed the connectivity. Musk explained at the time that “Starlink was barred from turning on satellite beams in Crimea at the time, because doing so would violate U.S. sanctions against Russia!” 

But who was Musk to decide what actions would or would not violate U.S. sanctions? 

In fact, Musk was trying to push Ukraine to agree to Russia’s terms for ending the war. 

At a conference in Aspen attended by business and political figures, Musk appeared to support Putin. “He was onstage, and he said, ‘We should be negotiating. Putin wants peace — we should be negotiating peace with Putin,’” Reid Hoffman, co-founder and executive chairman of LinkedIn, recalled. Musk seemed to have “bought what Putin was selling, hook, line, and sinker.” 

Soon thereafter, Musk tweeted a proposal for his own peace plan, calling for referenda to redraw the borders of Ukraine and grant Russia control of Crimea. In subsequent tweets, Musk portrayed a Russian victory as virtually inevitable and attached maps highlighting eastern Ukrainian territories, some of which, he argued, “prefer Russia.”

U.S. foreign policy experts also worry about conflicts of interest posed by Musk’s acquisition of Twitter (now X), given his business relationships and communications with the Chinese government. China has used X for disinformation campaigns. 

Some are concerned that China may have leverage over Musk due to his giant Tesla factory in Shanghai, which accounts for over half of Tesla’s global deliveries and the bulk of its profits, and the battery factory he’s building there. “Elon Musk has deep financial exposure to China,” warned Senator Mark Warner of Virginia, who chairs the Senate Intelligence Committee. 

Most of these concerns, by the way, came before Musk reactivated the accounts of conspiracy theorists and white nationalists on X and began pushing his own right-wing narrative on the platform, and before he announced his support for Trump in the upcoming election and posted a potential incitement to assassinate Biden and Harris. 

Elon Musk poses a clear and present danger to American national security. The sooner the U.S. government revokes his security clearance, terminates its contracts with him and the entities he controls, and builds our own alternatives to Starlink and Space X, the safer we will be. 

[bonthefuckjourx]

It is exceptionally lonely being Professor Malfoy

Pairing: Professor!Draco Malfoy x Reader

Summary: One night you are club hopping with a few of your college friends and the next day you wake up in the Slytherin dorm rooms. Finally, being in the world of your dreams you decide to take your future into your own hands and befriend Draco Malfoy only to realize he isn't in your year. He isn't even a student.

Word Count: 3k+

Warning: Slight mention of Depression and being cut with a knife.

Universe: AU where it's been 10 years after Voldemort's death and some characters find themselves back at Hogwarts teaching. Reader gets transported into this Universe.

A/n: This story will contain smut eventually as it will have more than one part. Characters apart of smut are not underage. The reader is 22 but is simply put into her "7th" year at Hogwarts. I hope you like it!

“Come on Claire, we don’t want to miss breakfast.”

“I know I’m coming. Just let me finish putting my hair up.” 

That’s weird, I only have one roommate and she was staying with her boyfriend the night before. Right? While keeping the crook of my right arm over my eyes, I tried to remember what happened last night. I went out with Ophelia and a few other people I didn’t quite know. We went to a few clubs and at the end we were pretty drunk. Did I go home with someone else? Am I in someone else’s dorm? Cursing to myself I decided to finally remove my arm and gather in my surroundings. 

Woah. I was in a huge dorm. It wasn’t like the American US dorm rooms I was used to back home. There were five beds in this giant room, I occupied one of them. My sight gravitated to the dark emerald green colors around the room. It had silver, gray, and black accents of all kinds. By the time I ventured off the bed I was laying in, all of the other girls had left the dorm. Being curious I decided to look through some people’s things trying to figure out where the hell I was. Before I could even do that I noticed the Slytherin House Crest on one of the walls. Holy shit. How did I not notice? I must still be dreaming, but this is the coolest fucking thing ever. 

Quickly I went over to the truck I found in front of the bed I had been sleeping in. I lifted the cover and found a wand case laying right on top of some clothes. My wand…

At that moment I remembered my account I created to be able to choose a house and wand. They must have carried over into my dream. My wand is aspen wood with a dragon core, a beautiful combination. Giddy with excitement I removed the wand from its case and swung it around a bit. Trying to remember a simple spell, I cast Lumos. A little flicker of light showed on my first try and I squealed in excitement. I went on to find my school uniforms and robes underneath it. Within a minute I was dressed and walked over to the mirror in the room. It was everything I ever wanted. I felt powerful, but also depressed at the idea that this was just a dream. 

In a rush I tried to find anything that might prove this was more than a dream. I looked in the other nightstands I found around the room. One of them held what looked to be a small ritual knife. Without thinking about what they might be using it for, I decided to make a cut on my arm. Typically in my dreams whenever I felt pain I woke up. Taking one deep breath and closing my eyes, I gently pressed the sharp blade onto my upper arm. Fuck, that definitely hurt. I opened my eyes to see beads of blood started to drip out of the wound. I wiped the blood off onto my clothes I had woken up in. That’s when it hit me. 

I was still wearing modern day clothes when I woke up. I was in a small tight black dress that I had used to go clubbing the night before. What if I brought other things with me? Frantically I searched my bedsheets and I found my phone. It still had a charge and displayed the date with it. January 25th, 2023. 

In shock I looked down on the bed once more and found a note. It was written with nice cursive words, but looked to be written in a bit of a rush. 

“You belong in this world, so I brought you here. Your future lies with Draco Malfoy, go to him. He will help.”

S

I belong in this world? With none other than Draco Malfoy. This all felt too unrealistic to be real. I was never one to believe that our world actually held magic, but I always wanted to believe. Perhaps Time travel was possible, just like in the cursed child. If this all was true then it was the best thing to ever happen in my life. It’s like a brand new start in a life where I won’t actually want to kill myself. 

Because of the note, I felt more at ease that I actually did belong in this world. Excitement pulsed through me at the idea that I finally could study magic. Only problem is, what year am I in? Before this world I was in my last year of college, at 22. I really wished I was in my 7th year here. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if all of my classmates were much younger than me. 

There’s only one thing I can do. Attend Hogwarts like normal, pick up intel about who I am from other people casually, pass all of my classes that I have almost no credible knowledge about, and actually be able to talk to Draco Malfoy. Ohh, this was going to be hard. I hope I even have class with him. What if Draco and I didn’t even have any classes together? Not to mention will he even like me or will he bully me too? 

I looked at my phone and hoped the time was at least right. Shit, I probably should head to breakfast before I miss it. With my newfound plan I opened the door to my room and made my way to the Slytherin common room. It was beautiful with its dark academia aesthetic, and I knew one of these nights I would have to curl up to the fire and read a good book.  I turned around a few times, but eventually I made it through the halls of Hogwarts and into the Great Hall where breakfast was being held. Quickly trying to keep my head down I tried to find an empty seat in the Slytherin tables. It wasn’t really that empty, but the closest person to me was at least a seat down. The best I was going to be able to do I suppose. 

My hangover was really starting to hurt me at this point, and I was extremely hungry. I dug into the breakfast meal in front of me and tried to not gain any attention. Before too long I heard a voice try to quiet everyone down from the Professor’s tables. 

“Good morning everyone! I’d like to congratulate you all on either your first day at Hogwarts or for continuing to show up again in the first place.” At this most students gave at least a small chuckle, but all I could notice was how the person speaking was Harry fucking Potter. I tried not to let my shock show, but someone to my right noticed. 

“I know even though it’s been two years I still forget our headmaster is Harry Potter!” I looked to my right to notice a smaller dark skinned girl. Her coily hair fell around her face and framed it perfectly. I couldn’t help, but notice her heart shaped glasses, and crystal earrings. She gave me the kindest smile I ever saw and the excitement in her eyes was hard to suppress. 

“Yeah, it’s crazy to think about isn’t it?” I said in response. I suppose the world I traveled to is in the future compared to the books. I blushed slightly, as it meant my favorite characters would be older than me. Perhaps more of them were teachers. Suddenly the sentence, I hope I have class with Draco Malfoy had a completely different meaning. 

“My name’s Aria, what’s yours?” She held out her hand for me to shake it and I did so with a grin on my face. She seemed really nice, perhaps someone I could befriend. 

“Oh, (Y/n) Teresi. It’s nice to meet you.” Her eyes lit up at my reply.

“Of course, why didn’t I figure it out. You’re in seventh year right? I am too. I think I saw you in lectures last year.” She looked away briefly to contemplate it, but decided she must have remembered enough and looked back at me, confident in her answer.

“Yeah, that must have been where you saw me. What class do you have first?” I tried to be casual, but I really was trying to figure out how in the world I was going to figure out my class schedule. 

“I have Defense Against the Dark Arts, what’s yours?” Shit, I don’t honestly know what I was expecting, but I suppose having a friend help you find what classes you had wasn’t so weird. 

“Honestly I have no clue. Is there a class schedule or something?” I said this with a small embarrassed smile trying to hide the fact I had no idea what I was doing. 

“Oh yeah don’t worry you can grab one at any classroom on the first day. I suppose they had a lot of confused students before. Come with me to DADA and we can get you one.” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding and let myself relax a little. It was less nerving to know I would have a friend to show me around after all. Even if it was just enough to receive my class schedule. 

“Sounds amazing Aria, thanks truly. I would be so lost without you.” With that we both had a small laugh and turned back to our breakfast. In a couple minutes we were both finished and decided to head to DADA to hopefully figure out where I was supposed to go. As we left the Great Hall I looked back at the professor’s table. No Draco. Maybe he wasn’t a professor after all? A wave of disappointment washed through me, but I sooner pushed it away. What if he didn’t want to eat in the Great Hall this morning? I’ve had plenty of mornings just like that. 

Before too long we found ourselves in front of the door to Defense Against the Dark Arts. Aria opened the door for me and announced our arrival as we walked in. 

“Professor Malfoy? We were hoping you would be able to give us a class schedule?” As we walked in I stopped dead in my tracks as I noticed Draco Malfoy in the middle of writing something on the chalkboard at the front of the room. He was the professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts. I’ll admit I didn’t anticipate it, but I found that it made a good amount of sense. A proud smile found my lips as I imagined what hardships he must have overcome since his 7th year at Hogwarts, to be standing here as a Professor today. 

“Yes I have quite a few extra, she can have one.” With that he motioned for me to follow him to his desk. I did follow him and watched as he opened a desk drawer and pulled out a small metal compact. 

“Here, it’s a bit of a new system. Just open it, speak your name, and it will display your class schedule.” I grabbed the compact from his hand and felt a slight shock when our fingertips brushed slightly. With that I looked up right into his expansive eyes. He held onto a soft smile, but his eyes held something entirely different. They felt darker than the emotion he was trying to portray. As if he was trying to figure out, just the same as me, what happened.

“Thank you, Professor Malfoy.” His name seemed to roll off of my tongue. I never wanted to stop saying it. 

“You’re welcome, Miss…?” He looked at me expecting an answer, clearly he has never noticed me before. 

“Teresi, (Y/n) Teresi actually.” 

“It’s nice to meet you, Miss Teresi. I hope I’ll see you in my class.” With that he gave me one last smile and proceeded to walk back towards the chalkboard. 

“I hope so too.” Before I knew it the words were out of my mouth. I really hoped he didn’t hear it, but the smirk that had appeared on his face as he turned away said otherwise. Utterly embarrassed I walked back over to Aria, and together we opened my class schedule. 

“Nice, it’s almost exactly like mine! Advanced Potions, DADA, Advanced Charms, Divination, Herbology… Except you have DADA dueling? That must be an elective. I think I have Advanced transfiguration there.” I stared at my schedule, I couldn’t believe how lucky I was with my classes. If I had a choice I would have chosen those classes myself. Who knows maybe this world was made for me and it already knew. 

“Hey and I have DADA with you right at the beginning of the day. Ugh, but I have DADA dueling last? I was looking forward to that one.” I mumbled that last part to myself, but Aria laughed to herself at my disappointment. 

“Come on, let's take a seat.” With that Aria led me up the aisle and we found a spot right in the middle of the room. Perfect for staring at Draco, I mean Professor Malfoy. I smirked to myself, this was going to be fun. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

This was not fun. Almost two weeks had passed since I first arrived at Hogwarts. I would be lying if I said I was a straight A student. My classes were difficult, and being completely new to magic didn’t help. I was completely lost in all of my classes, but I thought that with enough studying I might be able to pinch together a C or C+. My dreams were dashed though when I received my first test score in Defense Against the Dark Arts. 

“Miss Teresi, do you care to explain why you completely failed this test? I understand if it was just with it being the first few weeks back, but perhaps you need some extra help. See me after class if you’d like to take the offer.” With that Professor Malfoy left me alone with my thoughts and a failed test grade. Ugh, I really tried in DADA too. I was just so completely out of my element here, it scared me. Even though I loved being in this new world, sometimes I wished there was a Vocal Class here too. I loved to sing back home and my college major was going to be Vocal Music after all. I was enrolled in a lot of vocal courses, but also drama, musical theater, and dance. I loved every second of it even if I was lonely at times. Music was my escape. With being here I haven’t had time to listen to music, but to listen to the music I really wanted to listen to I would have to find a way to charge my phone. It died just a few days after I arrived. 

In my head though, I already decided I would join Professor Malfoy for help in DADA. Maybe if he liked me enough he would help me in other classes too. The only thing I hated was the seemingly sexual tension between us. It probably is all in my head, but I hate the fact that I am portrayed as a student. He would never actually look at a student like that, unless they were a 7th year that obviously was old enough. From looking at him he wasn’t very old, but definitely mature. He has slight stubble and his hair over the years must have become a bit more blonde. He was breathtakingly sexy and it was only amplified when he rolled up his sleeves. His rings were still a prominent part of his attire although I noticed he now has reading glasses he uses from time to time. He still bore the Dark Mark, but it faded significantly over the years. Would it be so wrong if I said I found it a bit hot? My point being, he probably would allow himself to find a 7th year attractive if he had a definitive answer that they were of age. Like a tattoo maybe…

With that thought I looked down at my hands and forearms as I rolled up my long sleeves. Of fucking course. I forgot that I had a tattoo sleeve done on my right arm years ago after I turned 18. It was magical and heavily inspired by Harry Potter. Swirls of magic made their way down my arm in black ink. Intermixed I had moons, stars, the Slytherin Crest, the Deathly Hallows symbol, and my patronus a hummingbird. The most important piece of it was the underside of my forearm. There it bore the Dark Mark. At the time I tattooed it in solidarity with Draco. As someone who never had much choice in their life, but to succeed where their parents felt it mattered, I understood. 

I realize now how much trouble I could be in if someone saw it. Hopefully when I saw Professor Malfoy after class I could try explaining a few things. The tattoo and maybe he would listen to my crazy story too, but the latter seemed like a stretch. What am I going to do? I could show him the note, or my phone too. I’m glad I kept all of those things in my bag at all times. It would be disastrous if someone found them in the dorms. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Professor.” I greeted him as I approached his desk and as he looked up at me he removed his glasses and set them to the side. 

“Please take a seat, Miss Teresi.” He motioned to a seat near behind his desk and with a flick of his wand he cast a spell. I looked at him confused as I had no clue what he cast. He must have realized my confusion as we both sat down. 

“To lock the doors and set my out of office sign up.” My breath hitched at what he might have implied. He looked almost evil. In the most handsome way. 

“Now about your grades…” At this moment I found him staring at my tattoos. If I wasn’t sure before, I am now. There’s no way he believes me to be underage. That one thought stood out above all others and made it hard for me to think of a coherent sentence. 

“Yes about that.” I tried to laugh off my embarrassment, but stopped when I saw how serious he looked. 

“Not to pry, but have you been paying attention at all during your time at Hogwarts? I mean, you missed way more questions than anyone I’ve had in my class so far. What’s going on?” He looked at me with concerned eyes and I could feel myself start to tear up. 

“You’re not going to believe me.” I almost whispered that sentence as I looked at him with broken eyes. However, he looked at me with empathy. His gaze hardened slightly as he spoke. 

“Try me.” His voice was firm, and his answer final. 

“Promise me you will believe me no matter what. My life has been insane. I don’t even think the great Harry Potter would believe me.” I looked to the side trying to find any distraction from his intense gaze. 

“Good thing I’m not Harry Potter.” He moved a free hand to brush a tear that had fallen. That simple act broke me and I knew that letter was right. My future, destiny, and home lied here all at once. 

“Okay well you’re going to want to clear your class schedule. This might take a while.” He removed his hand as I mustered up a smirk and looked him in the eyes once more. Sitting back, he leaned against his hand as he balanced it on the back of his chair with a gleam in his eye. 

“Anything for you, Darling.”