#ask games | ✑

[softedgessculptures]

✨🩷🌙 SEND THIS TO OTHER BLOGGERS YOU THINK ARE WONDERFUL. KEEP THE GAME GOING ✨🩷🌙

Thank you very much my angel 🌹🌹🙏🏻🙏🏻You're wonderful, one day I want to see if you know how to do spells 🔮🔮🔮🪄🪄

[kookslastbutton]

what love feels like ༓ myg (m)

✑ Summary: Being a mother to a beautiful baby girl and wife to an adoring husband is the most rewarding feeling in the world. But you also work a full-time job, are overtired most of the time, stressed, don't have any alone time, look very different than eight years ago, and sex? Well, that hasn’t happened in weeks. The gravity of the situation weighs on you until one day, all of your deepest insecurities rear their ugly head–that your husband might not love you as much anymore and someone could take him away from you.

Pairing: husband!yoongi x reader

AU/genre: angst, fluff, smut, marriage au

Rating: M, 18+

Word Count: 6.7k+

Warnings: swearing, both Yoongi and oc are in their 30s, mom and full-time worker!oc, reserved!dad!yoongi, lack of intimacy, mentions of body insecurities post-pregnancy, mentions of fear of abandonment, mentions of jealousy. irrational worries, built-up stress, light fighting, silent treatment, stubbornness, lots of reassurance, nightmares, cute backstory of how they met, a lot of ily, Yoongi and oc being good parents 🥹, Yoongi calls oc doll, and explicit sexual content

sexual warnings: swearing, kissing, neck kisses, pleading, banter, dirty talk, doll petname, asking for consent, b**b squeezing & sucking, hair threading, penetration, f*ngering, big d*ck!yoongi, growling, missi*nary, eye contact, tearing up, c*ming together

Now Playing: Breathing by Anne Marie

a/n: Okay this was for Yoon's bday. Based on the poll, husband!Yoon won. Was intended to be a Drabble but well...heh 😅 Anyway, I had a lot of fun writing this fic and Yoon is just such a good hubby for responding well to these very relatable insecurities. (Low-key love this couple...) I'm sorry for any typos or warnings i missed! I checked and double checked but a few might have slipped. Enjoy! Anyway please enjoy! 🥰

“So, you're Jia's father, huh? I don’t think I've seen you here before, and I’m sure I would have recognized you.”

With his back straight and arms folded, Yoongi gives the woman in front of him a quick once-over. Mid-40s, freshly single, and definitely in need of some companionship. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out; she’s been talking his ear off for the past twenty minutes like he’s some kind of remedy to all her problems.

Honestly, he just swung by to pick up his four-year-old from daycare after another grueling day at work. But the moment he walked in, it was as if all the single moms latched onto him like a flock of hungry geese. This one’s name is Sandra in particular.

It reminds him of his college basketball days, how the cheerleaders all too eagerly swarmed around him after sinking the winning shot at the championship game. Shame he was too busy eyeing the girl in the stands to care, her face buried behind a book twice as big as her head. Who reads an 800-page novel during the playoffs anyway?

Fate, as one may call it, intervened about a week later when his best friend became said girl’s lab partner. Yoongi didn’t make any sudden moves at first, but well, he did make her his wife three years later.

“It’s just so nice to finally meet the father of such a sweet child. Especially considering how many dads tend to take a backseat in their child's early years.” Is she still going on? Yoongi does his best to stay present, though it’s proving unsuccessful. “And Jia truly is an angel! It’s clear you’re doing a wonderful job raising her, even with a full-time job and all.”

Yoongi’s eyebrows knit together at the somewhat odd choice of words. “Thanks,” he drawls out, noticing her pupils dilating with every breath. “Most of the credit goes to my wife though. She’s a great mom to Jia.”

“Jia’s m-mom?” Sandra stutters, her mouth slightly agape. Yoongi senses the gears turning in her head as she struggles to process the unexpected presence of his wife. Tempting as it is, he holds down a smirk. Of course, he’s a happily married man–for nearly eight years now.

“Yeah,” he replies simply. “She’s usually the one to pick up our daughter from daycare, but she’s been working a lot of overtime lately. I thought I'd come instead so she can get some rest."

“Oh, well that’s very–“

“Daddy! Daddy, you’re here!” The sound of a familiar high-pitched voice, along with a light pattering of feet, diverts both adult’s attention.

“Hey kid.” Yoongi effortlessly lifts the small child once in front of him, securing her in his arms. “Have fun today?”

Jia gives an enthusiastic nod, bright red ribbons in her hair bouncing cutely as she does. Proudly, she shows him the drawing she made.

“See? It’s me, you, and mommy!” She makes sure to point to each part of the picture with her pointer finger.

Yoongi gently takes the artwork from his daughter’s hand and lets out a soft chuckle. “Now this is what I call a masterpiece! Mommy’s gonna love hanging this one on the fridge. How about I hold onto this and you go grab your backpack, okay?”

As soon as Jia’s feet touch the carpeted floor again, she races off to her cubby in the far corner of the room. Yoongi shoots Sandra a final glance before slowly following behind. “We got to get going, but nice meeting you.”

“You…too.” Sandra’s response is more than disappointed as she watches the father-daughter duo make their way out of the building. Evidently, Min Yoongi isn’t the single dad she originally assumed. Funny, she swore there wasn’t a wedding band in sight. Maybe she missed it.

“No, I’m sorry but I’m certain we haven’t used any of your services in the last six months. My husband canceled it in late October.”

With one hand, you grip your cell phone up to an ear while the other pops open the dishwasher. You’ve been on the phone with the cable company for half an hour, trying to make sense of an unexpected charge that appeared on your bank account this morning. You consider yourself more patient than most, yet after working all day, a pile of laundry waiting to be washed, and dinner threatening to burn on the stove, the last thing you have time for is arguing with your old service provider.

“I understand, ma’am, and I apologize for any confusion. I’m taking a look at my records and they’re all showing me that—oh wait a second.”

The young man on the opposite end of the line interrupts his own thought, piquing your concern in the process.

“What did you say your last name is?”

You answer and in an instant, you’re met with a thousand rushed apologies; something about getting the account names mixed up in their system. It’s difficult to decipher everything you hear with the front door being thrust open that very moment.

“Mommy, where are you? We’re home!” Your daughter not so subtly announces her presence from the foyer. She kicks off her shoes, hangs her backpack on the designated wall hook, and then rushes to the kitchen upon catching a brief glimpse of your shirt.

“It’s alright, these mistakes happen.” You hang up the call and turn around to find Jia only steps away, a big goofy grin on her face. Infectious, you break out into a smile yourself and swoop her up.

“Hey honey, I missed you so much!” You kiss the side of your daughter’s head as she wraps her small arms around your neck. “You look so pretty with all these ribbons in your hair! Daddy did a good job, didn’t he?”

Being that you were called into work earlier than usual this morning, Yoongi was the one who got Jia dressed and ready for daycare. You’re delightfully surprised by the results.

“Mmhm,” Jia nods, twirling a couple of strands of hair between her thumb and forefinger. “But Daddy pulls too much!”

“Maybe if someone had listened and stopped fussing when I told her, I wouldn’t have accidentally yanked on her hair when I was reaching for her favorite Hello Kitty scrunchie.” Yoongi joins you both in the kitchen, walking over to press a quick peck on your lips while tenderly caressing the small of your back. The gesture soothes you of your earlier frustrations. “Who was that on the phone? Cable company?”

“Yeah, they canceled the charge. Wrong account.” As you reiterate the entire mix-up, your eyes wander all over your husband. He’s especially handsome tonight, given his perfectly tousled black hair and navy blue blazer flowing over his body. It’s tastefully oversized with a clean, white top paired underneath. You, on the other hand, are sporting a raggedy old t-shirt and stained sweatpants.

There was a time when you used to put a shit ton more effort into your appearance. It was before you got pregnant with Jia, back when you and Yoongi were going out on weekly dates. Neither of you has that kind of time anymore, or energy for that matter. You didn’t believe the other moms when they told you the romance takes a nose dive after you have your first kid. Yet here you are, proven wrong again.

Being parents to a beautiful baby girl is likely the most rewarding feeling in the world for you and Yoongi. You don’t remember the last time the two of you got real quality alone time though. And sex? Well, that hasn’t happened in weeks. The gravity of the situation weighs more on you with each passing day to be honest. Sure, you’re not the same person you used to be eight years ago, but shouldn’t you and Yoongi still make time for at least a little intimacy?

“How was picking up Jia by the way?” You look at Yoongi who merely shrugs nonchalantly in response.

“It was fine. Nothing too out of the ordinary,” Yoong gives you another peck before heading up the stairs to your bedroom. “I’m gonna go get changed. Why don’t you show Mommy the drawing you did Jia?”

“A drawing?” You shift your attention to your daughter whose eyes sparkle like diamonds upon mention. “We should put it up on the fridge then. Let’s take a look hmm?”

“It’s in my backpack! My new friend and I were drawing together. Her name is Mi-Sun.” Jia continues telling you all about her friend Mi-Sun as you make your way to the front door where her backpack hangs. You’re fully engaged until the very end. “Daddy made a new friend too!” she joyously claps her hands together, not realizing the depth of her remark.

“Oh, who’s Daddy’s new friend honey?” You ask, staying as calm as possible.

“Ms. Cho! They were talking for a really long time today.”

Ms. Cho? You think back to all the moms you’ve met at daycare. Somehow you can’t recall ever hearing or meeting a Ms. Cho. She must be a single mom, you deduce. Was she new? What did she look like? And why didn’t Yoongi mention her when you asked?

This has to be nothing but a little small talk, an acquaintance at most. Besides, the moms at Jia’s daycare are quite a chatty bunch and Yoongi wouldn’t dare overstep any boundaries.

“Do you know what they were talking about?” You don’t enjoy asking your child for details about your husband, yet you can’t seem to help it this time.

“I dunno,” she shrugs her shoulders. "Daddy was laughing a lot."

Suddenly, the self-assurance you gave yourself earlier slips away; seemingly useless given the queasy feeling building in the pit of your stomach.

For the remainder of the night, you purposely dodge every attempt your husband makes to kiss, touch, and hold you. You’ve even begun responding to his questions in one-word answers and at times, with nothing at all.

Yes, you’re being petty; more than usual. The silent treatment frustrates Yoongi to no end and it isn’t very mature of you, but neither is refusing to tell your wife that some single mom was flirting with you in front of your kid! Okay, so maybe that's an exaggeration. Maybe it all sums up to a harmless conversation, but it’s not like you know either way with Yoongi being as reserved as he is. It brings you back to your early dating days when he wouldn’t think to tell you about various aspects of his day; who he ate breakfast with that morning or the one classmate of his that wouldn’t leave him alone for two semesters.

Truth be told, you're simply hoping that your husband will bring up the topic first, without having to be the classic nagging wife. You’re a jealous person by nature so it’s not a simple task. Even now as you fold the first batch of laundry on your shared bed, him on the other side doing the same, you struggle to keep from blurting everything out.

“So,” Yoongi fluffs up a clean pillowcase before sliding it onto one of the bed pillows. “How was work?”

What a basic question, you grumble internally. Is that all he’s got? “Was okay,” you reply. “The usual.”

“You must be tired from the day. Did you get to lie down at all?” Yoongi picks up another pillowcase, repeating the process as before. When he glances your way, it’s clear something’s on your mind. You’ve started pairing Jia’s socks far more aggressively than normal and you’re holding back your responses. “Did you hear me, doll? Or am I going deaf here?” The sarcastic chuckle distracts you from your task, forcing your attention.

You’re about to respond when your eyes briefly flicker down to his hands, his left one in particular. Where's his wedding ring? Yoongi always wears it no matter what. The same sick feeling from before returns tenfold. No wonder that Ms. Cho was all over him–she must have thought he was single.

“No, I didn’t get to lie down Yoongi. I worked all day, came home and made dinner, called the cable guy to get that stupid bill figured out, and now I’m doing the second load of laundry. I’m really just not in the mood to chat.” It comes out a blur as you snatch the empty laundry basket and head for your washer and dryer, your eyes welling up with tears.

“__, wait.” Yoongi tosses the last pillow near the headboard and stops you in your tracks, his hand firmly gripping one end of the laundry basket. The intensity of his stare softens as he speaks. “I'm sorry if it seems like I'm forcing you to talk. I know you've been losing a lot of sleep recently between work, Jia, and upkeeping the house. We just don't get a lot of time to see each other anymore and I miss you…I miss talking to you."

With every ounce of self-control remaining, you hold back any tears that risk spilling out. You don't know why you're acting like this, why you're crying over something that seems so small and insignificant to the rest of the world. Yoongi loves you. He's said it a million times and proven it to you over and over again, for eight years now. He wouldn’t cheat on you, yet you still get so worked up about the idea that someone could take him away from you. Someone half your age, more attractive, or hell even the opposite sex if it means fewer dark circles under their eyes.

"Why- why aren't you wearing your ring?" Your naturally confident voice dwindles to the whisper of a mouse. It's completely out of character, nevertheless, here you are.

"I..." Your husband's voice wavers. His gaze flickers to his left hand, where his ring should be, but isn't. "Shit...I took it off in the shower this morning," he confesses, frustrated by his forgetfulness. "I was in such a rush to get Jia to daycare, and me to work, that it completely slipped my mind. I'm sorry—I fully intended to put it back on." He pauses, then perks up. "It's still in the bathroom. I'll be right back, okay?"

You watch as he makes a beeline for the master bathroom, eager to rectify the situation as soon as possible. You should have kept silent what you say next, but you don't.

"No wonder the moms at Jia's daycare were so drawn to you."

"What?" Yoongi stops in his tracks. The dumbfounded expression on his face tells you that you've caught him off guard again.

"Jia told me about someone named Ms. Cho," you reluctantly continue. "The two of you were laughing and talking and–"

"Baby, don't worry about that." Seizing his chance, your husband walks back over to you and sneakily pulls the laundry basket from under your arm. He sets it on the ground after, then reaches to take your hand in his, but stubbornly you cross your arms.

"Her name's Sandra," he starts explaining. "She's a new mom at the daycare and she didn't know anyone, so she started talking to me. I got the sense she was a little overly friendly but it was all small talk, nothing more."

Still largely unsatisfied, you remain unmoved. "If it wasn't a big deal then why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"Because nothing serious happened. The majority of the conversation was her venting about her ex-husband and me wishing you were right there next to me. Please believe me. All I could think about was finally being able to come home to you after a long week with Jia in our arms."

"Really?" Well, now you're feeling guilty for avoiding him in nearly every way tonight. Guilty for believing such wild assumptions that he'd leave you for someone else over one measly conversation. Guilty for letting yourself get so worked up over a situation you, quite frankly, knew few details about.

"I mean it doll." This time, when he reaches out to grasp your wrist, he succeeds. He intertwines his fingers with yours and leads you to the edge of your bed, gently pulling you down to sit on his lap. "Do you really think I could look at anyone else the way I look at you? Or think about you the way I have for the last eight-plus years we've been married and known each other?"

You hesitate your answer, averting his eye contact. "I know but…"

"No, don't finish that. Look at me," he intercepts. "You and our daughter are the only women on my mind–24/7. I can't get either of you out of my head and I don't want to. I'm so sorry I forgot to put my wedding band back on this morning, and again tonight. I feel awful about it and I'll be more careful from now on. And another thing, when Sandra and I were talking I mentioned you multiple times. So, it's clear to her that I'm a happily married man."

The last bit of information manages to perk your ears. "You talked about me?" Your eyes widen as you finally shift your full attention to him. Yoongi eyes widen with you, amused by your sudden change of heart to look at him.

"I said my wife is an amazing mother, works too hard for her own good, and needed to rest today. Give or take a few words."

That's all? You huff to yourself. Would it been nice if your husband also thrown in that you were beautiful or stunning in that mix of compliments? Yes, yes it would have–again, you're pettiness clouds your better judgment. You're not as pissed off as before, but rather semi-irritated.

"Okay…well I guess it's fine then. I'm sorry for being short with you earlier. I shouldn't have made those rash conclusions about the ring and that woman from the daycare. It wasn't reasonable of me." You get up from his lap, yet Yoongi isn't entirely convinced that you're okay.

"There's still something you're not telling me. I can tell."

"No, there's nothing else." You waive him off, placing your hand on your bedroom doorknob "You told her you had a wife so it's fine. I need to switch the second load of laundry.”

"Come on, doll. Let's not leave things unsaid now."

Sighing at his plead, you find yourself giving into all your repressed thoughts and emotions. It swallows you up, like a tidal wave you can't stop. "Look at me Yoon. I'm sweaty, I have dark circles under my eyes, stretch marks, love handles, my hair's a mess, and all I wear are old sweats covered in stains. I'm nothing like I used to be! No wonder we aren't intimate anymore."

Yoongi rises from the bed at once, offended by the sudden digression. "Is that what this is all about? It’s not even about that single mom from daycare is it?" The truth of the matter sinks in as he speaks.

"I guess maybe so…though I'm still annoyed about that too." Great, you're back to square one again.

"Come with me, I need to show you something." Your husband gestures you to follow him, which you slowly concede to.

"What are you doing Yoon?" You both walk into the master bathroom, stopping in front of the large mirror above the sink.

"I'm showing you the woman I'm in love with and have been in love with for nearly eight years now. Sweats and all." Yoongi makes you face the mirror directly, hands around your shoulders. You have trouble stomaching the sight.

"Yoongi please, I can't. The laundry ringing off." You avoid looking into the mirror and make a move to leave the bathroom.

"Just stay with me a minute, please?" Your husband refuses to loosen his hold on you, turning your body so you're looking eye to eye. "No, you're not the same person as you were and neither am I. We're parents to a beautiful daughter now, who we love and adore. We're also overtired 90% of the time, juggling a million things at once. But there's one thing you can count on to always stay the same–my loyalty to you. I'll always be in love with you __, no matter what age you are or however way you look. There's nothing you can do to change that, so why fight it?"

Dammit. A single tear rolls down your cheek as you take in his heart-melting speech. It's not his words alone, it's the sincerity behind them. How he's repeated similar countless times before throughout your entire relationship.

"I love you, Yoon..." you choke out the words, composure fleeting.

"I love you so much, doll." He wipes the wetness of your tear with his thumb. "As far as us not being as intimate anymore, that's my fault. I don't ever want you to feel like I don't desire you every day. Why don't we send the kid to my parents this weekend and let me start making things right hmm?"

"I don't know if we can this weekend. Jia has a playdate on Saturday."

"So, I'll ask Mom to take her. She'll be happy to, trust me. We can finally watch that movie you've been dying to show me since what? December?"

"You're serious?" Your eyes light up at the mention of what is essentially a movie date. The show Yoongi's referring to is one you've been craving to see for months, yet neither of you has found the time to watch. "I've been talking about it for so long, Yoon."

"I know you have, it's why I suggested it. I've been wanting to watch it too with all the trailers you keep sending me. Plus, I'll be able to keep my beautiful wife in my arms for over two hours. That's a lot for us, especially with you being such a busy bee. I can never get you to light in one place! What's up with that, huh?"

Feeling your natural self re-emerging, you throw a playful swat to his arm and scowl at his teasing comment. "You're one to talk! You're basically a workaholic! Besides, you knew who you were marrying when you met me."

Yoongi chuckles and brings both hands to cup your cheeks, squishing them slightly. "A cutie who reads 800-page novels at a basketball game?"

"Stop babying me!" You pull his hands off your cheeks and rub them, trying to regain some composure. "I don't regret my choices, I like books. It's why I'm such a boss at work!"

"Okay, boss," he laughs. "What about what I suggested before then? I can call Mom tomorrow and ask her if she could watch Jia for the day. She'll take her to her playdate, then they can spend the rest of the day together."

It does sound nice, having the whole day with your husband.

"Okay," you agree. "Let's try."

"Good." Yoongi slides his hands down to your hips and pulls you flush against his chest. "How about we seal it with a kiss now?" You nod and he leans his head down, pressing an amazing, tender kiss to your lips. It makes you both giddy on queue.

"Read one more story, Daddy!" Jia leaps off her small, twin bed and bounds for her bookshelf. She lets out a series of giggles when a large pair of hands catch her, lifting her high into the air.

"I already read you three books kid," Yoongi says, planting a kiss on her cheek. "Bedtime." He then tucks her into her fluffy comforter, plugs in her teddy bear nightlight, and closes her bedroom door.

The next second, Jia comes running out of her room, latching onto his right leg. "I don't wanna go to bed. I wanna play!" Figures she'd be hyper at this hour.

Yoongi sighs and picks her up. "Daddy told you to go to sleep, it's not playtime. You'll have lots of time for that tomorrow when you get to see your friend." He then carries her into her room, yet she fusses in his arms; thumping her tiny fists into his chest.

"No, no, no, Daddy. I want to play!"

Sighing, Yoongi looks at his child with sharp eyes. "Jia–"

"Hey," you interrupt, entering your daughter's bedroom upon hearing the commotion down the hall. "What's going on?"

"Kid doesn't want to go to bed."

You give an empathetic look and saunter over to the pair, gently taking Jia into your arms. Yoongi places his hands on his hips as he watches you reason with your daughter.

"Jia, you know tomorrow's a big day right? You and Sana are going to go to the playground together." The child nods. "You don't want to be tired when you're playing do you?"

"No..." She shakes her head. "I want to be awake!"

"Then you need to listen to Daddy and go to sleep. That way you'll be full of energy tomorrow when you and Sana go on the swings or slide down all the big slides." You smile as Jia starts rubbing her drowsy eyes, yawning in the process.

"But I...okay," she slowly concedes, eyes fluttering shut as she gives into her sleepy state. Unsurprising to you and Yoongi, she was tired all along. But like most kids, hated going to bed.

"See?" You lay Jia in her bed and pull the covers up near her chin, giving her a light kiss on the side of her head. Yoongi bends down and does the same after you. "You just gotta talk to her a little, she'll typically fall asleep on her own."

"But I read her three of her favorite books." Yoongi shuts off the overhead light, along with the door to Jia's room, and follows you to your bedroom.

"That's different Yoon," you argue back. "Books excite her."

"She takes after you that way then." Yoongi pulls his t-shirt off, leaving him bare-chested, and climbs onto his side of the bed. You join him shortly after with your head resting on his chest and an arm thrown around his waist.

"I'm so exhausted," you yawn.

"Go to sleep, baby. I'm right here." Your husband places a hand over your wrapped arm, sending you off into a deep slumber.

Well this is just ironic. Almost 2 A.M. and you're wide awake.

What initially started as a nice, relaxing dream quickly turned into a terrible nightmare. In the dream, you woke up alone. Yoongi was gone. Jia was gone too. You can't exactly make sense of it, except for a vague memory of Jia calling another woman 'Mom'. You couldn't see her face very well, so it could've been anyone. You couldn't speak either, so even when you tried approaching the three, they couldn't hear you. You've had nightmares plenty of times, but this one is new. It's a clear projection of all the underlying concerns upheaved from earlier; insecurities, abandonment, loss, and it has you unsettled.

You glance over to your husband's side of the bed. He's fast asleep, no longer cuddling you due to you both flip-flopping in your sleep. You decide to slide closer to him, needing to watch him for a while. It might sound weird, but you love watching him sleep. He's so handsome and you feel a great deal of comfort doing so. Maybe if he was awake, you'd tell him about what you dreamt. Then again...maybe not.

"I love you Yoon," you whisper as quietly as you can, tracing his every facial feature with your eyes.

"'m, I love you too."

Is he-was he awake? As if caught red-handed, you quickly flit your face away in favor of the blank ceiling above. You weren't expecting him to answer at all, and in such a hoarse voice too. You're a little turned on by it to be honest.

"Can't sleep?" he speaks up again, eyes still closed.

"No, I''ll be okay though. You can go back to sleep. Don't worry."

He grunts, a tad unhappy with your dismissal of him. "Do you want to talk about it? Your dream?"

You whip your head in his direction. "How–" You pause, seeing his eyes blink open.

"I didn't meet you just yesterday, doll. I know they keep you up. Just know, I'm always here okay? Always." He reaches for you with delicate fingers as he continues. "Now, come here. Seems we got separated in our sleep."

You accept the offer and cuddle into him again. This time your noses nearly touch and his arm wraps around your lower waist. You feel the growing urge to kiss him, wanting to forget your nightmare entirely. But perhaps silly, you ask permission first, seeing as he's close to drifting off again.

"Yoon?"

"Mm."

"Can we kiss?" Your cheeks flush a little at the request. Why are you acting like this? You've been married for years.

"Sure, 'm tired but I could go for a make-out right now." A small smirk graces his lips as he teases you. You give him a classic 'Yoongi!' in reply. "I'm kidding. You don't ever have to ask me that," he finishes.

"Hmm, maybe I don't want a kiss anymore." You feign stubbornness, just to see his response. And a response he gives you, more than you're prepared for.

"You're ridiculous," he grumbles, capturing your lips in one fell swoop. He moves his lips against yours as the hand on your waist grips tighter. The tiniest of moans escapes your lips.

You attempt to break the kiss first, thinking it will only last for a few seconds. Yet Yoongi slips a hand behind your neck to bring you into another kiss. One that's deeper than the last. You feel your breath being taken away little by little, especially when his tongue licks into your mouth. God, you haven't kissed like this in an eternity. A wetness soon gathers between your thighs.

"'m, Yoon," you gasp when his cool fingers sneakily make their way under your shirt, tickling your bare skin. They travel the expanse of your waist, stomach, and up along your back. "So cold."

Yoongi pulls away from the kiss and retracts his fingers. He then lazily moves his body until his chest hovers over your own, rolling you on your back in the process. He's a bit of a blur due to the dimness of the room, yet you can see the whites of his eyes a bit better than before.

"Help me warm them then," he says, folding his hands on top of yours from where they rest on your stomach. "You're really burning up, doll."

His observation is right. Ever since you woke up, you're body's been hotter than normal. The stress is clear and it's only increasing due to the unexpected turn of tonight's events; your husband seemingly wanting to make love to you in the middle of the night.

"So I am," you reply, staring straight into his eyes. "Must be because of all the sudden surprises today. My body's finally responding to it all."

Yoongi nods, following your implication. "Well let's do something to calm it down, shall we?" He waits for your final go before making any abrupt movements.

"But...you haven't seen me–"

"Naked in a while?" he predicts your next words, unfazed. "I've seen it all, each time better than the last because I love you. You're beautiful to me, no matter what. Let me love you __. I've missed you. I've missed us."

"Okay...please," you sigh, desperately needing his touch. "It's been so long since we've been this close."

Neither of you has it in you to delay another second as you dive into another fiery kiss, your hands wandering up and down each other's bodies. You love his hair the most, so you run your fingers through it repeatedly. Your husband's soft grunts remind you that it's as pleasurable for him as it is for you, and as if to counter, he latches his lips to the curve of your neck.

"Yoon," you moan, shivering at the feeling of being peppered in open-mouth kisses. Your eyes automatically roll up as well.

Yoongi nips at your jaw next, featherlike, yet deadly to you nevertheless. He doesn't allow himself to linger more than a second, though, preferring to keep you on your toes. So with careful fingers, he begins lifting the bottom of your shirt.

"Can I?"

You hum in approval and lean forward for him to remove it.

With your nipples now exposed to the brisk air, stiffening due to arousal, Yoongi brings both his hands up to caress your boobs. He's incredibly gentle, telling you how beautiful you are once again until his thumbs start circling your peaked nipples. A rush of sensation shoots up your spine as he rolls them harder, flicking them once in a while.

"Fuck," you swear.

"Feeling good?"

All you do is nod fervently in response, which Yoongi takes as his signal to lower his head to your chest. He squeezes both breasts in his hand before wrapping his mouth around a nipple, licking and sucking relentlessly. He repeats the same to the other.

"Yoongi, I need you. Please." You're core tightens, thighs struggling not to rub together, as you plead with your husband to relieve you. You are so wet and getting wetter.

"I'm here, doll, I got you. Fingers first hm?"

He pushes part of the comforter towards the foot of the bed, then gestures for you to raise your butt. Any shred of mystery of how worked up he's gotten you slip away as he pulls your underwear and pants down your legs. They both get tossed on the floor, per usual.

Bare pussy exposed, Yoongi guides your legs further apart and brings a hand down to your entrance. One of his long, slender fingers traces up your folds so smoothly that you buck your hips upon the touch. He smiles lightly at the subtle response, pleased that you're finally enjoying yourself; too often you put your needs last. His finger slowly sinks into your well-lubricated pussy, velvety walls clenching around it.

"Oh, g-god," you give a shaky moan as his finger pumps and curls in you, stimulating your g-spot. "Need you now, Yoon, so bad."

"Mm not yet, we need to stretch you out. You haven't taken me for a good three or four weeks," he smirks at your eagerness, sliding a second finger next to the first. "This pussy is drenched but not enough. I need you to come. Can you do that for me?"

Fast, quick movements follow suit as your husband works you up to an orgasm. Oh fuck, oh fuck, you chant in near whines. Your pussy is spasming around him, walls tightening with each push and pull. You know when he draws his hand out that it's covered with your come. Messy, sex is messy and both of you are too far gone to care; the pleasure sweeping over you.

Finally, in what feels like an endless tease, you have your first orgasm of the night. You feel your body relaxing into the mattress again, yet your breath remains short. Yoongi, on the other hand, groans seeing your release dripping down your thighs and onto the sheets. For a split second, there's a slight darkening in his eyes while he takes in your post-orgasmic form. The two fingers that had been inside you are sensually brought to his lips, slipping between the seam before being cleaned off.

You're taken aback by the action, though you've witnessed it before. Something about watching your husband willingly follow through with a gesture so lewd makes your head spin–you want him to fuck you right this instant. He must share the same feeling because you don't even need to sound the words due to his hands already making quick work of his pants.

"You drive me mad, you know that? Can never get a break with how sweet you taste. Your lips, your come. All of it makes me go mad." His full length comes in view, hard and tip leaking with pre-cum. You try not to let yourself stare at the thickness but hell, you must've forgotten the extent of your husband's size. You don't remember it being this big before.

"Well," you gulp. "You're not making it easy on me either, looking like this."

Yoongi climbs over to you again, settling into a straddled position, and looks deep into your eyes. "Who's fault do you think that is?"

"It's your fault." You bend your legs and wrap them around his mid-section. You can feel the tip of his cock tease at your entrance. The anticipation is beyond grueling.

"No," he says, aligning himself up to your weeping hole. "it's yours." He then thrusts his hips forward, his length sinking into you so perfectly it has you completely satisfied.

"Y-Yours," you whimper out, unable to form a steady sentence.

"Fine." He picks up his pace. "Let's just agree we both fuck each other up on a daily---ah fuck!" Yoongi growls and gives you a suspicious look when he feels your pussy suddenly clench around his length.

"I didn't do it on purpose this time! You're fucking me too good is all."

"Really? You're not just teasing me?"

Yoongi is slow to believe since you've purposefully clenched countless times before, simply out of playfulness. Tonight is different than those nights though because you're telling the truth–he's truly fucking you so good.

"What the hell," he concedes. "You feel so fucking fantastic, I don't even care." He continues his movements, thrusting into you with deep groans and labored breaths. His fingers grip the mattress harder with the veins in his neck bulging out.

Both your bodies move in sync as the familiar sound of skin slapping on skin echoes off the walls of your bedroom. You do your best to keep your moans low, not wanting to risk waking up your daughter.

"Yoon, fuck! I need to come, it's gonna-fuck-happen soon," you swear, pussy throbbing at the feeling of being so full after weeks of abstinence. You can tell you're reaching your high with the bundle of nerves in your core threatening to snap at any given moment.

Of course, you're wet too, extremely wet.

"I'm. Nearly. There." He barely sounds the words out, jaw clenching. "Just another minute, and we can finish together."

Your eyes, which haven't left his since he entered you, begin to glass over with tears. It's overwhelming; his love for you. No matter the doubts that tell you the opposite, you can't give in to their ugly lies. You'll continue to struggle, naturally, but you won't ever let them win. Yoongi's never once given up on you, and neither should you.

"I love you, Yoon...I love you with all my soul," you choke the words, falling apart all at once. "I'm sorry for today. How jealous and irrational I got."

"Don't apologize, doll. I shouldn't have let it go so far, our lack of intimacy and alone time. I promise we're going to make it all right okay?"

Giving you one last thrust, you both have your release at the same time. Yoongi helps ride your orgasm out by lazily continuing to grind into you. Yeah, you might need to shower and switch out the sheets after tonight, but you don't regret it one bit.

"In all seriousness baby," Yoongi speaks up, guiding your legs back on the soft mattress until you’re comfortable. "Don't feel like you have to apologize for everything. I understand your feelings and where you were coming from. I will say, the silent treatment kills me though. I'd rather you yell at me than not talk to me at all."

"It's not easy for me to raise my voice like that, Yoon." You throw your arms around his neck and sigh softly. "But I can try talking to you more, or at least tell you I need some time to process before I'm ready to have a conversation. I don't know, am I making sense?"

"Plenty of sense. I'll share more about my day with you and who I'm talking to as well. We'll also carve out time to have together. I love our daughter, but I don't see the harm in reaching out to our friends and family to babysit once in a while."

"Well, this sounds good to me," you hum.

"Me too." Yoongi smiles wide and goes in for another warm kiss. Your eyes flutter shut in unison.

This is what love feels like.

a/n: LMK what you think 🥰

Masterlist | Requests: closed | Taglist | Fic Recs

no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton

[4ln-stay8]

A stream full of surprises

✑ summary: you join Max for a stream that doesn’t go the way you expected to

✑ pairing: lando norris x fem!reader

✑ autor’s note: so this is my first attempt on doing this so Im really sorry if it sucks

✑ warnings: some stuff might not be accurate but its a fanfic so just pretend

You sat nervously in front of the computer, joining Max Fewtrell's Twitch stream for the first time. You and Max had become close friends fast, thanks to your secret relationship with Lando Norris. Due to you being often alone for a few weeks in a row sometimes, you and Max often hung out when Lando was busy with Formula 1 commitments.

You were often busy studying to get your masters degree. You sometimes needed to stay behind on all the fun you could have by joining Lando and travelling with him but you needed to study so you could keep your scholarship.

“Hi guys! Welcome back to the stream! Today we have a guest who will be joining us, my good friend Y/N. Say hi to her chat!” said Max starting his stream.

The stream started surprisingly well. The chat didn’t payed much attention to you at first, even tho Max made sure that your presence is known. They were very busy trying to get Max to respond to their questions. It took them about 10 minutes to actually acknowledge your presence and then the hell got loose. The chat was flying with questions about who you were and why were you there. Speculations about the relationship between you and Max, people asking where Pietra was and why were you there instead of her were all you could read.

*Chatuser: who is that?

*Chatuser: where is P?

*Chatuser: is she your new gf?

*Chatuser: why is she here?

Max, being the lovely person he is tried very politely to respond to as many questions as he could.

“Guys, as I said, this is my friend Y/n and she will be joining us for today’s stream so be nice chat”

To your surprise, the stream went pretty smoothly from then on. As you chatted and laughed on the stream, the chat kept buzzing with speculations about you and Max being more than just friends. With each new viewer the subject of who you were and what was your business with Max kept repeating over and over again. You then started to blush at the comments, unsure of how to respond.

You weren’t used to being in the spotlight, one of the reasons why you and Lando were keeping things a secret. Unlike them, you weren’t trained to respond in front of cameras, how to respond to personal questions as politely as possible without actually answering them. You were totally unprepared and in that exact moment you hated yourself for letting Max convince you to join him.

You strongly disagreed to his proposal about the stream, not even Lando could convince you to join him but after Max repeatedly asking for you to join you changed your mind and agreed to do it.

Don’t get me wrong, there was nothing you wanted more than to stream with your boyfriend. Seeing him become a chaotic storm, watching his eyes light up whenever he would get a sub or have fun. There was nothing more you wanted that to hear his loud laughs and frustrated screams whenever he was gaming. You wanted to be a part of it but you couldn’t.

You were a very shy and awkward person around strangers and knowing there were thousands of people watching you didn’t sound pleasing to you, but you wanted to change that. You wanted to become more comfortable in front of the camera so you could be all the way in, in your relationship. You wanted to be more comfortable with the fans before you would announce your relationship with Lando and join him around the world. You wanted to make sure they liked you.

Meanwhile, Lando was on his way home from the airport, having just returned from the last race weekend of the season. He got bored on the uber drive and he decided to tune into Max's stream to see what was he getting up to. He was surprised to see his girlfriend on the screen. He often tried to convince you to join him on the streams but you just didn’t agree with him. He didn’t want to push you to do it knowing how shy you can get but what he didn’t understand was why did you accepted Max’s offer instead of his. He just stood there, surprised and confused, watching in silence as the chat filled with ship names and teasing messages about you and Max.

His jealousy flared, and he couldn't help himself. When he finally arrived home, he payed the driver, quickly took his bags and he burst into the house. He left all his things by the door and ran to the room you were in. He opened the door loudly, surprising both you and Max, causing you to jump in your seat.

Lando didn't waste a moment. He quickly approached you without saying a word. When he got in front of you, he cupped your face and he leaned in and planted a passionate kiss on your lips right in front of the camera. The chat went wild, emojis and exclamation marks flooding the screen. Everyone was stunned not knowing what the hell was going on.

*Chatuser: what just happened?

*Chatuser: did lando just kissed y/n?

*Chatuser: 😱

You were petrified at first, your eyes wide as you tried to process what was happening, but then you slowly melted into the kiss, your hand finding its way to the back of Lando's neck. You missed the way his lips felt on yours, the way his hands cupped your face, his thumb slowly brushing your cheek. You were addicted to his kiss. You were addicted to him. It was a brief moment, but it felt like an eternity in front of thousands of viewers. Time just stopped whenever he was near you.

When you finally pulled apart, Lando realized what he had just done. He looked at you with wide eyes and pink cheeks as he was trying to think his next move. He chuckled nervously and helped you to your feet, settling you on his lap as he took your place in front of the camera.

"Hey, everyone," Lando began, trying to hide his embarrassment. "I guess I should explain what just happened." He glanced at you, who was still blushing furiously. You got all shy and he knew it.

“So as you most likely saw, I kissed Y/n. Well that would be scandalous in different circumstances but the truth is that Y/N and I have been dating for the past year. Well, I hope we still are after that stunt I pulled” he said chuckling and he looked at you for reassurance.

“We decided not to make it public due to the fact that Y/N gets a bit shy around strangers and I wanted to make sure that she is as comfortable as possible in this relationship.” He said giving you a small smile

The chat went crazy about all that was happening. Not only did they witness a very private and intimate moment between the two of you, but they also got to see the way Lando looked at you while he was trying to explain the situation.

*Chatuser: the way he looks at her trying to make sure she’s comfortable 😫

*Chatuser: can they be any cuter?

*Chatuser: God it’s me again…

Max was sitting quietly next to you, only making his presence known with small chuckles as he read the chat. He patiently waited for you to finish your conversation before he could actually start teasing his dear friend.

You stayed quiet as well, giving small smiles to the camera trying not to seem rude. You read the comments as well, smiling even wider as you saw how nice and accepting the fans were to you so you decided to make your presence known by teasing your boyfriend.

You leaned in and whispered to Lando, "You couldn't handle the chat teasing us, could you?"

Lando laughed, brushing a strand of hair from your face. "I guess not," he admitted. “ You know I don’t like sharing whats mine” he said playfully.

You looked at him amused and decided to keep teasing him. “I mean, Max is quite charming today I’m not gonna lie” you made a small pause looking at the way his brows frowned “…but you know I only got my eyes on you, right?

You smiled looking at him, your heart swelling with love. You just adore him in ways you didn’t even know that was possible until you met him.

He looked at you with love in his eyes, trying to memorise the way you look, and answered with a simple “I know my love! I only got my eyes on you as well” he said lovingly.

The chat continued to explode with comments, but now it was filled with hearts and messages of support for the couple. Max, who had been silently watching the whole exchange, grinned and gave them a thumbs-up.

“You know guys, if I knew I had to watch you being grossly cute again I wouldn’t have let Y/n join me” said Max earning a light slap on the shoulder from you.

“Oh shut it Max… It’s not like you don’t do the same” you said rolling your eyes giggling at how chill your friend was.

“So what are we gonna do know?” Asked Max trying to change the subject while it was still in a respectful state.

“How about you guys go play something while I’ll go find P?” You said slowly standing up from Lando’s lap ignoring his protests.

“Fine we will play something. You can go and gossip with P now but first give me a kiss” said Lando trying to look as cool as possible.

You leaned in and pecked his lips one more time before slowly walking towards the door. Lando groaned as he didn’t got the kiss he was hoping for, making you giggle.

The boys went back to the stream playing games and causing chaos as they usually do while ypu and P enjoyed some quality talks while drinking some tea.

You never would’ve thought that this would be the way the world would find out about your relationship and you definitely didn’t expect the fans to be so nice about it. At the end of the day you were really grateful that Lando did what he did knowing that you now could stop hiding your love.

[cx-boxbox]

[ask game] processing for intercontinental flights bc that shit converted me over to bottom lando

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

You know this very well by now, Ki, but I'm a genuine slut for Oscar presenting himself as calm-collected-patient on the outside while being an absolute animal inside.

Lando's a slut too.

Which is why I wrote him getting railed in an airplane. I wouldn't make him do something that disgusting outside of horny, possessive, mind-blowing post-misunderstanding sex.

And Oscar! I love it when his personality shines through, and if having him fuck Lando over a gross airplane lavatory counter is the best way to portray how I characterize him, then so be it.

They match each other's freak.

From this post.

[vroombeams]

finally, processing and/or dvd bonus for my beloved sweet talk would be very interesting. thank you <3

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

oh sweet talk my sweet talk. so stupid. so ill-advised. i feel like sweet talk really was just the most prime example of being committed to the bit? like well kee vroombeams will do most anything for the meme of it all. and i will! and in this case i did

it was a bit of a manic one tbh?? i think i wrote the whole thing in a series of sprints where i was averaging like, 600-700 words per 15 minute round. which is great for getting Many Words out. but not great for the guy who has to edit those words. (i'm that guy) overall it was like. fun?? i think?? i don't know i think i was in a fugue state gandalf voice i have no memory of this place. but it was also one of those fics that the more i looked at it the more i hated it so i just had to buckle up and post at some point lol

re: the actual process, conceptually love a threesome. logistically it's like now there are six arms and six legs and three dicks and six balls and three hearts and one and a half brains and and and. and. AND . there's just a lot going on. there's been a sequel in the works for months that came up similarly (many frantic sprints) and it's already longer than sweet talk and it's like maybe two-thirds done so. i don't know. i didn't learn my lesson the first time i fucking guess!!!!!

✄ DVD BONUS: pick a fic and I’ll describe or write a deleted scene!

To Oscar's credit, he barely bats an eye when Logan presents him with possibly the dumbest plan he's ever had. "So he just wants to watch," Oscar says. He's slumped in the exact chair in the corner of the hotel room that is being discussed, actually, and Logan's receiving untold psychic damage about it. "Yeah," Logan says, messing around with his suitcase so he doesn't have to look Oscar in the very much unbatted eye. "It's—I mean, maybe he was just memeing, man, I don't know." "I feel like if you've gotten to the point of scheduling it it's not a meme anymore." "Advanced memeing," Logan amends. "Like, it's Alex. Who fucking knows what goes on in his head?" Oscar says, "Hmmm." Logan peeks up from his already extremely tidy luggage, continues pretending to tidy it. Oscar's still looking at him, of course, because Oscar looks all the time like he knows things and Logan knows that he knows things but he doesn't have to make it such a thing, does he? "What?" Oscar shrugs. "I'm not bothered either way," he says, and it's literally just this second that Logan realizes he hasn't even fucking asked if Oscar's down for this. "Just, you know. Make sure it doesn't bother you." He's caught for a second between apologizing or throwing himself to the floor at Oscar's feet and thanking him for being the most unfazeable human person on this earth or maybe offering up sexual favours in exchange for his like extremely severe blunder of not asking if it's actually okay to invite Alex Albon to watch them fuck. "It doesn't bother me," he settles on. It comes out all muttered and sheepish, but it's pretty much the truth. Like, ninety percent of it.

fic ask game 💃

[jamiesfootball]

✑ PROCESSING for a few steps above never

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it! (from this ask game)

This one was absolutely grueling to write. A complete slough. Every sentence a brick that needed to be chiseled in hopes that it would fit into the next. It took forever to work it into something that flowed, and then about 4 hours to edit into passable shape for posting

4 hours. For 1399 words.

That said this was the point in augusnippets that I’d begun to feel really defeated, and posting this fic really boosted me back up. It had way better response than I’d been anticipating (Colin Hughes as a main character doesn’t necessarily draw a lot of hits), and stats wise this one landed roughly in the middle

Not bad for a story I threw together in about 24 hours start to finish. Not bad at all

Fic here

[blake-elladonna]

♡ Uncanny ♡

✑ 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐩𝐨 𝐱 𝐘𝐨𝐮 (𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫) 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟑𝟑𝟓

✑ 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: Sharing snacks with Ranpo — your coworker who normally doesn’t share his snacks with anyone — was definitely a rare occurrence; but if you asked him, he would say you beat him at his own game when it comes to the unexpected.

Not even Ranpo’s munching of variously opened snacks could keep your attention off of the pile of files in front of you; and it wasn’t until you sighed that Ranpo redirected his attention. “You know, these snacks aren’t going to disappear by themselves.” He said so matter-of factly. “And neither are these cases, Sherlock.” You interjected.

He let out a sort of lazy response with the tossing of a few more sweets into his mouth. “That may be true, since you know, my ability does hold this place together.” You scoffed at that and raised your attention to his head. While he leaned far back in his chair, his rimmed glasses slid back into his hair. You smiled; taking the pair of eyeglasses off of his head.

“Hey, what are you—” “—These cases aren’t going to solve themselves.” Your comeback caused him to blink and stare at you. He went quiet and to be honest, it was the quietest you’ve ever witnessed Ranpo being.

“Ranpo—” “Put them on.” His voice was authoritative. His response wasn’t what you had bet would come from him. You thought it would be a demand or lecture. “Put them on.”

You slid the frames onto the bridge of your nose then with care, lowered your arms back down to stare at him staring at you.

It wasn’t until you saw his face darken with a dust of pink and red shadow that he scrambled and took the glasses off of your face; shoving them back onto his own when Yosano walked into the board room. Raising her brow she questioned, “Did I— miss something? Should I walk out and back in again?” When you shrugged, she redirected her attention towards Ranpo, “Are you doing alright, Ranpo?”

“I’m fine. I need to focus on these cases.” His words had little to no emotion and with his arms shoveling the folders into his chest, he maneuvered his way out of the room leaving you and Yosano alone.

“Huh. What was that about?”

← Previous Drabble Master List Next Drabble → 🎊 ♡ Exceptions ♡ ♡ Coerce ♡ 🎊

⇐ Last Ranpo Drabble Next Ranpo Drabble ⇒ N/A ♡ Sweet tooth ♡ 🎊

Feeling festive? Click here to read more from the Valentine’s Event!

© 2023 @blake-elladonna™ — all copyrights reserved. Please do not translate, steal, repost or claim my writing or ideas as your own. Click here for further details.

[actualbampot]

o/

for the ask game:

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

for Blood in the Cut, if you would :3

H*rny

But seriously, while it was all shameless self-indulgence, I was actually quite proud of that one. Simply because, it turned out to be exactly the kind of fic I love to read:

Smut at it's core, but there's added layers sprinkled in there if you read closely enough, whether it's character development, or something unexpected that toes on a line of plausibility.

The characterisation points I wanted for Neo in the beginning took a few revisions to make feel meaningful.

Other than that, yea dude it was just h*rny asf

[ectogeo-rebubbles]

For the fic ask game: ✑ PROCESSING for “and if you don’t love me now, you’ll never love me again”

Thanks for the ask!! <3

(for this ask game)

Okay so, and if you don't love me now, you will never love me again likely started out with the fact that I had never successfully written a Broken Link fic despite TRYING many times. I think one or two people have actually seen the drafts of one of my early ds9 wips (c. 2020) that had Broken Link + garashir as a focus, but it was such an unfixable mess that I long ago abandoned it haha. Luckily no writing - even the stuff that goes blessedly unpublished - is ever wasted effort, because Broken Link thoughts continued to percolate in my head for years, which is Step 1 of the process. :)

Step 2 was coming up with the specific plotbunny of garak kissing julian goodbye before julian went down to the planet and then, later, julian being more mad at garak for the bad timing of when he finally asked him out, than for garak having just tried to destroy the planet he was standing on (it's all just part of the bad timing!).

Step 3 is to forget whether or not you started writing this plotbunny, only to learn it's actually just been a daydream on loop in your head. I only know this happened because I was trying to get a timeline for the writing process for this post and found a message I sent in March 2023 saying something like "haha oh yeah I just remembered a cool wip I started awhile ago (or thought I had started writing, because I can't find it now)..." The outline was def drafted and developed in DMs.

Step 4 is to use the Chakoteya transcripts as a reference for the episode while writing a rough first draft. I think I did rewatch the episode once or twice at some point to confirm that the missing scenes I'd written made sense in the chronology of it (I think I may have had to rearrange things after one of the rewatches, like I think I at first set the first scene in the hallway outside of the infirmary, but that was BEFORE Garak's convo with the Founder, so that made no sense and I had to rewrite it). Also, I tend to draft in bursts, and then edit super slowly.

Step 5 is to have a seemingly unrelated great idea for an Extreme Measures fix-it fic where Julian kisses Garak goodbye before they both go off to do their dangerous things that they might not survive. And then to realize that both of these fics are nearly the same concept. And then use that realization to fuel my evil writing powers and fan the flames of my inspiration, and, like, compare and contrast between these two points in time and between which of them is the one initiating the first kiss that is also a goodbye kiss. <3 Sometimes you just have to work on the exact same fic multiple times simultaneously, you know how it is. I finished "kiss me hard before you go" first because it was for an event that had a deadline haha.

Step 6 is to continue to let the mostly complete draft simmer for weeks and/or months, while editing and tweaking and trying to think of a title and deciding how to finish up ONE (1) bit of dialogue. Luckily I did finally find a PERFECT title (Garak knows that Julian won't love him after what he's about to do - also the song the line's from is called The Chain, and the episode is about The Great Link, so that's just a fun lil bonus), and I think I brainstormed with you and Dill in order to nail down the last bit of dialogue I needed.

I hope you've enjoyed this!! <3 My memory is really bad so I hope I am representing my writing process somewhat accurately hahaha

[oblivions-dawn]

🕯️🥤🌿 for the Writers Truth or Dare!

✑ On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? Why is that?

UHHH I . . . edit as I go! I really love going back through and fiddling with words and sentences until they ZING. Sometimes though they are zingy right off the bat and that's always the best feeling. But editing is part of the writing process and I love it all so . . . . YAY

✑ Recommend an author or fanfic you love

I must ALWAYS recommend @thequeenofthewinter's absolutely AMAZING fanfiction. I never thought I'd adore her Ulfric as much as I do, but damn it, she has completely ensnared me. I will also recommend @umbracirrus's fanfiction starring Jarl Balgruuf and @sylvienerevarine's fanfiction with Roggi!! I could sit here and recommend five more fanfictions but I will refrain nyehehe

✑ Give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

I am perhaps the worst person to ask at the moment, as I am deep in a writer's block and very low on creativity due to, well, life. You can't always force writing and creativity, so I've done my best to relax and play Skyrim [among other games] and remind myself that sometimes just daydreaming about writing and scenes is just as much a part of the process as it is actually doing it. It's hard not to beat myself up every day for not writing, but I know I'll return to it soon enough; I just need more time. ❤

[deaddove]

Hii! For the fic ask game, ✑ and ♡ for at a price you can afford and ✄ for Cocoonverse!

slight sappiness below the cut

writing price was really weird... when i started it, i hadn't been writing consistently, rarely finishing anything and never sharing for uhhh several years. but i still indulged the urge when i got it, even though i didn't expect it to go anywhere. i have no idea what it was about this story in particular that made me keep coming back to the document (i think partly i had somehow convinced myself that my idea was very obvious and someone else was going to write it if i didn't which made me feel competitive? idk.) but anyway i kept adding little bits of banter until i ended up with a draft that seemed finishable. i had this feeling like "wow! i didn't know this could happen..." which sounds silly because it's a relatively short simple fic haha. i still struggle a lot with confidence in my ability to follow through on my ideas but writing that fic really felt like overcoming a hurdle.

(on top of that, the fic got a warm reception right away which i didn't realize at the time was entirely thanks to you sharing it. i am so grateful for that <3)

as for my favorite small detail, it's gimmicky but i like that neither ouyang's or ayushiridara's name appears in the fic

deleted cocoonverse scene- this feels like a cheat answer but i cut a bunch of baoxiang pov out of kinghunters. there was just too much going on already and i thought i should let baoxiang be secretive a little longer like in canon. there are also some scenes from silk coffin i initially wrote in his pov before deciding to stick with ouyang. however i don't want to say much about those scenes because they are being reworked for the next installment... but if i end up not using some of it then maybe i will share that in the future :)

[shrinkthisviolet]

Processing and Evil Twin for i’ll give you everything i have (and teach you everything i know)?

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

It was admittedly a bit of a challenge 😅 it was one of those necessary fics I had to write to establish why Lucy is living with him, and it’s not my favorite in the AU, but it was a fun challenge to explain why Lucy isn’t living with, say, the Naberries, and why Obi-Wan would risk raising two Skywalker children in such close proximity

(The answer: it’s a big risk, but hopefully the Outer Rim is far enough away to avoid too much scrutiny, and it’s better than putting her in close proximity to the Empire…especially since Pooja Naberrie is part of the Imperial Senate in Legends (while also running a secret rebellion), which makes her and Leia friends. It's not canon (technically it never was, but it definitely isn't now), but it's one of those Legends things I like to consider canon because it a) makes sense, b) fleshes her out as a character, and c) connects her to the Skywalkers (Leia specifically) in a way I find compelling)

☹ EVIL TWIN: send me a fic or scene and I’ll give you the unhappy ending version of it!

The only one I can really think of is Yoda refusing to let Obi-Wan raise Lucy, and insisting on doing it himself because the risk of Vader or Palpatine discovering Luke and Lucy is non-zero. It’s not an unhappy ending per se, but it’s a different path (and it's probably unhappy for Obi-Wan, in any case)

fanfic ask game!

[thousand-winters]

Hello pal, I hope the cats are doing well and some kittens are staying indoors haha! 💖

For the fic ask, "processing" for Body, Bone, and mind

"small things" for Your body will be a monument

And "new shapes" for Operation: Make Darius like me

(sorry I'm on mobile I can't copy the cool font & shapes with each one lol)

Hi, friend!!! They are, thanks goodness, they were going to drive me insane ahaha. I hope your September has improved even a little!!! 💖

Thanks so much for the questions!!! From this ask game

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

Okay, if you want me to be very honest, it was a bit of a "oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god, why did I procrastinate so long, I'm so late. Girl, why" since it was a gift ahahaha 😭 Guys who keep writing fics the night before it's due, I will never learn.

Aside from that, I was super excited though, like I vaguely mentioned in the tags, it's based in a convo I had with my friend Terra over on Discord and gods, it was such a iconic one haha. The amount of people who did a double take when we mentioned it like "I'm sorry, the organ thieving convo???" is so funny to me. I had been wanting to write it for ages, so I was very hyped for it.

The most fun part to write was Hunter's little breakdown. I'm sorry, Hunter. I just really enjoy getting to write characters when they're in a bit of a messy mental state and playing a little with the narrative to convey that.

♡ SMALL THINGS: pick a fic and I’ll tell you my favorite minor detail from it!

Oh, I had SO much fun deciding the details of the altar, since obviously not everything that goes in a traditional Día de Muertos altar made the cut, since I was trying to do it inspired by and not completely the same thing, plus adding a magical element to it to make it work for the Boiling Isles.

Another little detail I had a lot of fun with was deciding how corporeal to make Flapjack's spirit and that whole description when Hunter has him in his hands. I was going for a very specific feeling and I think it came out nicely.

✰ NEW SHAPES: send me a fic and I’ll give you an alternate direction the fic could have gone!

I don't think I had many variations with this one, it was so straightforward with the silliness and then coming clean haha. Though the original intention was NOT for Hunter to snap at Darius like "wow, yeah, be myself? You didn't even like me before", that just kinda came up by itself when I was writing the scene and along with the more serious little convo they had there, it just felt right.

So I guess the alternate direction was the same but sillier haha. Like the premise of Hunter trying to imitate someone else to be a "good kid" is angsty to begin with but I was going for goofy originally. Somehow that never works out that well for me haha.

[flawlessassholes]

For the ask game, processing for First 👀

✑ PROCESSING: pick a fic and I’ll tell you what it was like to write it!

This is SUCH an interesting choice for first because the inspiration and way it came about is quite different from my other fics. i listened to vampire by olivia rodrigo and then immediately went to the brain trust (@xoxogossipzoe and @lilyrizzy) to discuss

i try not to usually write fic while ive got active wips because i use the excitement of a new fic idea as motivation but this one grabbed me by the throat and then very organically i was like hey lily send me a tumblr prompt so i can write it (SOMETIMES THINGS ARE MANUFACTURED)

Lily very big brainly suggested kiss in greed and i was off to the races writing the first prompt which took off… and then i kept writing… until it was almost 7k. Im still shocked by the reaction to it frankly and im shocked at how disgusting it is because i am not really a pwp writer AND im shocked at how continually obsessed i am with it and others are… and how it will hopefully continue on in perpetuity!!!

Fic Ask Game!

[thiefscant]

all's well that ends...

#THIEFSCANT;; an independent, selective, and private roleplay blog for ANAIS EVERNIGHT, my tav aka the PLAYER CHARACTER from baldur's gate 3. my name is bean (32, they/she) and i will be your guide! pls don’t hesitate to approach with questions or plot ideas. i'm here for it all!

a study in: learning how to trust, moving from chaotic neutral to chaotic good, what's a god to a nonbeliever?, discovering life can be about more than just surviving but maybe there are some things worth dying for.

✑ CARRD » MEMES » HEADCANONS » PLAYLIST

beta editor + xkit rewritten only. rules under cut + everything else on carrd.

travels with: @bolyde. @crowshoots. @sacrificedmore. @stormlit.

currently playing: baldur's gate 3, act 3 (game unfinished) currently most interested in: canon/bg3 rp, dragon age rp, tolkien rp.

blogroll: @atomiqueen. @heartsdefine. @thiefscant.

                                      ...not as bad as it could have.

✒ RULES & GUIDELINES.

GENERAL: SELECTIVE AND PRIVATE. this means i’m particular about who i follow and i will only write with mutuals. my blog is semi-iconless (depending on the muse/if i feel like making icons or not). NOT SPOILER FREE. NO GODMODDING, metagaming, etc. EXCLUSIVITY IS RARE but not unheard of so you can find my mains/exclusives list here 

WRITING: I USE PRIMARILY THIRD PERSON PAST OR PRESENT TENSE. i'm not entirely comfortable roleplaying in first or second person (yet). when it comes to verb tense, i'll often check to see what my partner is most comfortable using and go with that. i can do one-liners or multipara threads, but longer things will likely take a bit more time.

SHIPPING: I SHIP CHEMISTRY, and i do not force ships because i’m not a monster. i definitely enjoy a good romance, but platonic and queerplatonic dynamics, rivalries, etc. are just as interesting to explore! i am unlikely to ship romantically with more than two portrayals of a canon muse, so as to ensure things don't get stale for me or my partners.

FOLLOWING/UNFOLLOWING: IF I FOLLOW YOU, IT MEANS I LIKE WHAT YOU HAVE GOIN' ON AND WOULD LOVE TO INTERACT. it doesn't have to happen immediately, just down the line! i'll give most folks at least a week to follow back (thus indicating mutual interest in writing together at some point) before unfollowing. but if i really enjoy your blog/portrayal, i may stick around as a passive follower so long as i am welcome!

BLOCKING: I PREFER TO BE HARDBLOCKED IF YOU NO LONGER WISH FOR ME TO FOLLOW YOU for any reason. this is so i don't assume tumblr unfollowed you for me and refollow, inadvertently crossing your boundaries. if i suspect someone has softblocked me, i will likely hardblock them myself to avoid refollowing in the future. (i am generally quite liberal with the block button, as i'm serious about curating my online space.)

PRONOUNS: ANAIS USES THEY/SHE PRONOUNS INTERCHANGEABLY. you will likely see me alternating between them in my posts, headcanons, replies, etc. if there is ever a time when this is too confusing (ex: I am writing opposite a muse who uses strictly they/them pronouns, making the prose easier to follow if I use strictly she/her for Anais), I am happy to use one or the other. If you find it too confusing to use both in your replies, our preference leans towards they/them (but she/her is also acceptable esp if your muse uses they/them also).

PLEASE DO: BREAK YOUR REPLIES FOR ME UP INTO SMALLER PARAGRAPHS if we write together, as my adhd makes hugelong paragraphs difficult to read; ASK ME TO TAG YOUR TRIGGERS if i’ve neglected to do so (whether i’m following you back or not); like my starter calls, SEND ME MEMES, turn my meme replies into threads (if we are mutuals); SHOWER ME IN PLOT IDEAS and ooc chatter; HAVE PATIENCE with me on all of the above; FEEL FREE TO UNFOLLOW ME at any time for any reason, as i will be reserving the right to do so myself 

PLEASE DO NOT: USE SUBSMALL TEXT or multiple spaces between words in our threads as i find both difficult to read; UNFOLLOW/REFOLLOW to get my attention (it won’t be the kind of attention you’re hoping for); EXPECT ANY KIND OF IMMEDIACY FROM ME IC OR OOC. i love making friends via roleplay, but i’m one smol nerd just trying to have a good time and i won’t stress myself out by trying to keep up with everything at once. just know it’s not personal, and i’ll get back to you as soon as i have the energy.

I WILL GLADLY: TAG NSFW AND TRIGGERS appropriately and accommodate those who ask to the best of my abilities; WELCOME LGBTQIA+ HEADCANONS; USE MY SHITPOST TAG (#blacklist for less soft nonsense.) on most of my inane ooc content so feel free to block it, that’s why it’s there

I WILL TRY: TO REMEMBER IF YOU DON’T LIKE TO BE REBLOGGED FROM, but please note that I have ADHD and may forget. Often and repeatedly. (A bit more info about this can be found here.) If being reblogged from on the reblogging website really bothers you, please feel free to soft/block me as needed. Relatedly, I don’t really care if you reblog things from me that aren’t in-character roleplay posts and/or headcanons. I do think it’s polite to reblog a meme from the source if you don’t send one in, but I don’t personally consider it a blockable offense.

MUNDANE: MY NAME IS BEAN/BEE. they/she. nonbinary lesbian. i’m 32, neurodivergent, and a full-time grad student with two jobs. I’M WHITE. in the event that i fuck up and/or swerve out of my lane, i invite my friends and followers of color (or fellow white folks who are wiser than me) to let me know. i can and will do better.

[rosietrace]

🍀✨ for any of ur ocs!

Cracks knuckles I'm about to get a little silly 😈

Warning: Long ahh post

Oc ask game

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤† Victoria Shard, the beautiful manipulator

✑ 🍀 — What originally inspired your oc?

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I'm glad you asked! And plus, I have her (updated) inspiration board to help me out with this >:]

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Behold! Victoria Shard's inspiration board!

Now..... Onto the explanations >:)

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Upper Left: The Magic Mirror ]

↳ Snow White and the seven dwarfs (1937)

Obviously, we're going to start off with her main inspiration, the Magic Mirror!

But first, I'll give a little fun fact! Victoria wasn't inspired by the Magic Mirror, at least not originally!

During her conception back in October of 2020, Victoria was originally going to be twisted from the Evil Queen's crow instead of the magic mirror

This, however, changed after realizing how much she suited the magic mirror much better (especially with the unique magic I've given her)

Anyway, back to the trivia!

I wanted to take key aspects about the mirror and find a way to put them into Vic as a character.

This ended with these characteristics about the mirror being transitioned into key pieces of Vic's personality:

Honest ➜ Blunt, Incapable of lying (but capable of bending the truth)

Ominous ➜ Intimidating

Reluctant(?) to serve the Evil Queen ➜ Obligated to follow orders from certain individuals (Her grandmother, father, Vil, etc.)

Obviously one or two of these three reasons may or may not seem far fetched, but that's mostly because of how twisted my logic can get 😭

For obvious reasons, the Magic Mirror is also incorporated into Vic's unique magic: Mirror Mirror. It allows her to persuade others into telling the truth to whatever she asks, but can also alter their psychological state(similar to how the Mirror calling Snow White fairer than the Queen essentially made her vanity/envy transition into wanting to kill Snow White out of spite)

And although I can't spoil anything about it, I will say this: Mirrors play a really big role in Vic's main story, and I had to create a new dimension for her story because of it.

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Upper Middle: Kafka ]

↳ Honkai Star Rail (2023)

Okay.... It sounds odd on paper, but I have a reason for this, I swear 😭

I can't exactly spoil anything about why Kafka's one of Vic's inspirations, since it's crucial to her behavior in an unspecified main story, but I can tell you one other reason!

Her voice. More specifically, her English voice.

Cheryl Texiera, voice actress for Kafka in the English dub of Honkai Star Rail, also happens to be one of three voice actresses for Vic's EN voice.

I know, three voice actresses for one character is fucking weird, but I couldn't help myself and it was hard for me to choose between the three options chosen 😭

Really, the only thing I can say is that the calming sound of Kafka's voice fits Vic's more casual nature with those she's close with.

So, for now, that's your only answer as to why Kafka's one of her inspirations ^^;

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Upper Right: Medea Solon ]

↳ Your Throne (2019/2020)

So, Medea is one of my favorite manhwa characters.... Ever. And, while reading Your Throne around the time I was redeveloping Vic, I legitimately thought: “Hey, why don't I just... Give Vic certain aspects of Medea's character?”

So I did just that, like I did with the Magic Mirror.

List of traits Medea and Vic share:

Manipulative nature

Skill in combat(More specifically, swordsmanship)

Political knowledge

Cunning and Ambitiousness

Color palette

The last one is slightly significant, as before Medea, Vic looked a lot more like.... A taller, more mature, female version of Epel with long hair. Thankfully, I didn't go through with that 😭

And, not-so fun fact: Medea's backstory was one of the inspirations for Vic's backstory ;-;

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Middle Left: Arlecchino, the Knave ]

↳ Genshin Impact(2020)

This inspiration mostly came about after the Fontaine teaser: “The last feast” 😭

I couldn't help myself! Arlecchino's voice, wardrobe, and way of speech was just so..... Victoria.

It felt way too perfect to not incorporate a bit of her into Vic ^^;

Erin Yvette did a fantastic job voicing her in both the Fontaine teaser and A Winter Night's Lazzo, and I don't regret adding her as one of Vic's EN voice actresses.

With the way Arlecchino acts in both trailers, I can most definitely see Victoria acting in such a way whenever she's in a particularly more manipulative mood. More specifically, when she wants to assert control over others.

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Middle Right: Raiden Ei/Shogun ]

↳ Genshin Impact(2020)

Okay, so for obvious reasons.... Raiden, more specifically the Shogun — rather than Ei —, inspired a lot of stuff for Vic.

Her color palette, her personality, way of acting, etc. And especially her voice. Miyuki Sawashiro is just- Chefs kiss

The fact that she voiced two characters who Vic was inspired by just amplified how much I don't regret making her Vic's JP voice actress 😭

I could go on and on about how Ei and Vic also share similarities, especially with Vic's softer side, but if I did? This post would be longer than originally intended 😭

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Bottom Left: Momobami Kirari ]

↳ Kakegurui

It sounds far fetched like Kafka, I know, but I only really based Vic off of Kirari for two key things about the character.

Her voice

Her intelligence

Kirari is also voiced by Sawashiro, and frankly, Sawashiro's performance as Kirari and Raiden Shogun fit Vic perfectly.

Kirari has this calming, yet unsettling kind of voice that can easily put anyone on edge, and that just happened to be a voice I wanted Vic to have! And as said before, I'm never going to regret making Miyuki Sawashiro Vic's JP voice actress.

Plus, with how intelligent Kirari actually is, I can also vividly see Vic using her intelligence to play around with those around her. Especially with what I have planned for her character arc.

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Bottom Middle: Keira Parvis ]

↳ I am the real one(2020/2021)

Keira, more specifically past Keira, was a major inspiration for Vic's behavior as a child. Which is to say Keira didn't have that much of a good life 😭

Desperate to please her father, Keira strived for his attention in the same way I imagine Vic doing as a child. Except in Vic's case, she's desperate to please her grandmother, rather than her father.

Keira in present day is also manipulative and intelligent in her own right, but her level of intelligence is more suitable to a much younger Victoria.

▹     †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

[ Bottom Right: Claudia Chamberlain ]

↳ I became the Male lead's rival

And finally, Claudia! Funnily enough, the character shares a name with one of Vic's servants

Unlike the other characters, I didn't take much inspiration for Vic from Claudia except for pieces of her appearance.

Personally, Claudia is how I always imagined Vic to look like with white hair. And I've been brainrotting about white haired Vic many times 😭😭

As for her behavior, Claudia doesn't seem to share many characteristics with Vic's general personality. Her softer side, maybe, but not so much with the personality we know Vic to have.

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✑ ✨ — How did you come up with your oc's name?

Good lord, this post is going to get even longer.... Sort of.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

For reasons — Those reasons being spoilers — I can't reveal the meanings behind three of Victoria's names: Regina, Amarantha, and Annabella.

These names play a really significant part in her main story and the unspecified main story, so for now, it's best if you don't know anything behind the symbolism of those name choices.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The name Victoria was chosen because she wanted to win. Always. Never lose, only win. But she can't always do that.

It's already been really well established how much Vic loves winning. Getting what she wants brings satisfaction to this woman's veins, and losing just takes that away from her

To Victoria, losing meant failure. And by being a failure, she's failed her family. Her title. The very thing she's worked her ass off, her whole life.

As told by Grimhilde, “Losing shows weakness, and a Shard shan't show weakness”. And Victoria still tries to go by her grandmother's word.

She's willing, and I mean willing, to do whatever she wants to get what she so desperately wants.

Even if it means hurting those around her.

➜ The name Victoria also happens to be the name of the Roman Goddess of Victory, also known as the Roman counterpart of Nike. As such, in Latin, the name translates to ‘Victory’.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

A Shard is bound to shatter. And with time, Victoria will as well.

➜ A ‘Shard’ is a broken piece of glass created after having done something to damage the glass just enough, for it to shatter — and eventually fall apart.

Obviously, with her motif of glass and mirrors, the last name was fitting for Vic. Especially with her connections to mirrors and glass in her own lore.

However, the name also serves a more symbolic purpose of portraying Victoria as a character.

She's fragile.

No matter what she does to deny it, no matter the victories, no matter the honor such victories bring her; She's still fragile. As fragile as any other mortal, despite not being one herself.

At the end of the day — what happened to Victoria only happened because Grimhilde chose to hurt her when she was only a kid.

And by hurting that little girl, she continued to hurt the young woman she so desperately wants perfection out of.

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Interpretation of meaning: ‘A broken victory’

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