#as well as the Penis imagery of course

[houseswife]

infinitely funny that wilson turned vegetarian while house was in prison to show that he’s moving on with his life and is capable of making personal changes that don’t revolve around his boybestfriend situationship but then the MINUTE they reunite he’s like “let’s get dinner! I’m craving MEAT 😋😋’. what kind of symbolism is this. I’m going to say a slur

[go-go-devil]

infodump to me about the lamb lies down on broadway so i have the intel for my next big listen of it!!!

Here I go!

So The Lamb is honestly a pretty insane album, not just for Genesis but classic prog rock as a whole. It's one of the most ambitious and creative concept albums I've ever listened to, but because of that it can be very alienating to some listeners due to how vague and overly poetic the lyrics can get (not quite Eraserhead levels of dream logic, but it gets close at times and most of us have very different takeaways from the story).

I think what makes this album so enjoyable and timeless for me is how unabashedly fearless it is in simply having fun telling its story. There's lots of dramatic and intense moments, but its also paced well with beautifully ethereal bits and even some silly moments. Every single song plays its part well and flows in perfectly with the next, no matter how much of a mood whiplash the lyrics or music can feel at times. Hell, one of the last lines in the album is "If you think that it's pretentious, you've been taken for a ride," and I just love that! It's the spirit of prog rock right there: go crazy and have and adventure, who cares what uppity critics think!

Besides that, it's also one of the most autistic albums ever made. Partually because I hc Rael as autistic due to the way he speaks and acts but also because the very nature of the album is like one big surrealist autism moment. Rael's constantly trapped in uncomfortable places that are too constricting or too crowded with people he can't understand and/or has trouble being around, and even has an anxiety attack at the end of "The Chamber of 32 Doors" due to being trapped in a room full of people who won't shut up. I felt all of that as a teen in high school, and I still feel it now T_T

Then of course there's my "controversial" interpretation of the album, at least I assume it is amongst many of the Lamb fans I've found on this site and irl, that this is one of the most delightfully sex-repulsed stories I've ever engaged with. Probably done by complete accident, but I don't care!

Just hear me out on this one. Sexual intercourse is NEVER shown favorably in this album; it's either not well executed/completely humiliating ("Counting Out Time") or overtly disturbing ("The Lamia" and definitely the album notes describing the Slippermen's fate in "The Colony of Slippermen"). The story ends with Rael sacrificing his penis to save both himself and his loved one, and that's a fucking insane thing to type down but I'm not exaggerating anything! That's just what The Lamb is like! Rael gains enlightenment by sacrificing a part of himself that never truly gave him anything fulfilling in his life.

One of the reasons I got into prog rock was because I'm sex repulsed and so many classic prog songs have nothing to do with sex or romantic relationships, and it's honestly so goddamn refreshing to find a piece of media that, for fucking ONCE, depicts sex as something as uncomfortable and unfulfilling as I've always known it to be. I felt seen by this story in a way most of my other favorite fiction could never achieve.

I'll never know what exactly Peter Gabriel was thinking when he wrote this story, and I certainly won't act like anyone's sex-positive interpretations of The Lamb aren't valid. But that's the beauty of it. It means different things to different people, but unites them all in a weird, rocking tale with some of the craziest imagery ever put to an album <3

[degenderates]

What would almost-terf talking points look like? Genuinely curious because I never see stuff like that, though I may just not be aware of it. Thank you in advance ❤️

hey! no worries, it takes a lot of being on the internet (unfortunately lol) to notice the patterns of how online terfs talk about gender and make their stuff palatable for the masses, so here are a few pointers. keep in mind that people who post this kind of rhetoric aren't always terfs and you should be skeptical of ANYBODY who tells you that there are a complete set of "rules" you must follow or subjects you must avoid. think for yourself, but also be careful. with that being said, here are some things i've noticed after being on the trans internet for a few years:

1- "radfem"/"radfem-safe"/"radblr"/etc. usually they're a terf they just dont want to add the te- to the acronym. funny thing is they're not all that radical lol.

2- gender essentialism. this is one of the most insidious i think, because it's so well disguised, or simply poised as common sense. this can include anything about men and women being inherently different, whether this is about sexual violence, sexuality in general (including types of queerness), love, understanding/intuition/empathy, certain skills, whatever. sometimes it's just a joke but be careful because humor is a form of persuasion as well, just easily able to avoid blame. the reason why gender essentialism is terfy is because it posits that gender is immutable. ie. can't change. women are inherently like this, so someone who identifies as a man now will never get it, even if they end up being trans later. though some of these takes might have an addendum of, "trans women are women" or something like that, supposedly being inclusive of trans ppl, they don't account for people who aren't secretly eggs their whole lives. sure, a transfem who always knew she was a girl might be "included," but not a trans person who lived as their agab for their first 20, 30, or even 40 years. etc. tldr: this kind of rhetoric reveals how people truly feel about gender difference regardless of what they claim to support.

3- "male/female socialization." this one's tricky because yes we as humans in a society are socialized and yes that includes gender (which is a social construct in and of itself), but the vast majority of times i've seen this phrasing used is by terfs, so much so that if trans people want to talk about gender socialization, we have to use other terminology. the problem here is that folks' "current" gender is considered null and void due to how they were raised. this one is sort of the opposite of the phenomenon of "including" trans people in gender essentialism--it blocks us out from our actual gender in favor of seeing us as what we once were.

4- a weird fascination with militant genetalia. urls or bios that include stuff about vaginas and cunts killing people or whatever...i'm not against this, but most people who have this on their blog are terfs lol. aside from the jokes, people who see phallic imagery as something inherently violent or the penis as a body part as violent instead of like, the person as violent (if they are) is a big one. i guess the militant vagina is like reclaiming this somehow. i'm not sure. but it's a thing.

5- gatekeeping queerness. people who try to limit queerness to being lesbian/gay/bisexual, acephobes, arophobes, people who have this very basic understanding of queerness as same-sex attraction. sometimes they hate the word "queer." people who don't understand queerness as a culture and a way to play with gender and identity and presentation as well as sexuality, or as a political entity. queerness isn't just about being gay or straight. now not all acephobes are terfs, but because terfs have admitted to using acephobia to induct people into being radfems, and most terfs are acephobic....well. that's just one example, of course, but the point stands. anyone attempting to divide the queer community is inherently sus to me.

and finally, 6- if you download shinigami eyes, people marked as terfs show up in red. be careful because sometimes people mark others as red out of malintent, but if the person is showing other signs of being a terf and is red, they probably are one, lol. hope this helps, and other people feel free to add on! as always, take my post as just the observations of one individual, as a grain of salt!

[meow-moment]

*person i know personally who draws and publically posts porn* Haha sick dude. I love cranking my hawg to your penis images daily. *person i dont know personally but highly respect who draws and publically posts porn* If she knows im aware she makes Erotic Imagery well both instantly die of mutual embarrassment. only course of action is to have my larynx removed before this can occur

[charmwasjess]

27 and 29 for the ao3 wrapped game please)

THANK YOU @purple-ant!!! :D :D 29 favorite passage from this year

Of course my inclination is to give you something dramatic and juicy from an unpublished WIP but honestly? I shouldn't laugh so hard at my own penis jokes, but Dooku and Jocasta trying to pick out smutty poetry while (badly, awkwardly) also attempting to make up in the final chapter of Sitting is probably up there. Lol, her little 'fear for your chastity' line when you know she's absolutely already tapped that:

“I am looking for books of love poetry.”

“Love poetry?” Jocasta's eyebrows arched.

“Yes.”

“Is this your idea of a bizarre joke?”

“I am asking very much in earnest.” He wanted to point out that it had taken him a lot to even come here, but she could probably sense exactly how much herself.

“And you could not simply use the holonet?”

“Ah, I’m searching for specifically bad love poetry.” Dooku explained. “Notorious works containing flowery, over-the-top language, saccharine imagery, expected tropes.” He thought about it. “Actually, any truly appalling sexist material… objectifying the female form, outdated gender roles…that would be perfect.”

Jocasta opened her mouth and then closed it. Finally, she said, “I hadn’t taken you for such a romantic.”

“It is merely a gift for someone. A thank-you present.” When she continued to stare at him, he clarified, “I am not attempting to seduce anyone.”

“What an incredible relief. With such an effective technique as that, I was in terror for your chastity.” He watched her fingers fly over the datapad as she entered in a title. “And the intended recipient of this gift is… an enemy of yours?”

“A friend.” Dooku gave a weak smile. “A friend with remarkably poor taste in poetry.”

“Thoughtful.” She skimmed the datapad’s screen with her finger for a few moments. “Here. Aroylio Bogins’s seminal Strums of the Luscious Soul is apparently popular.” She expanded the sample page and read silently, winced, and then read aloud, “She knealth before the strings of my pert love-lyre / My lute clangeth to the song / of her tongue’s nimble ministry…”

“Oh no.” Dooku said faintly, covering his mouth with a hand.

“You said ‘truly appalling.’”

“…‘ministry’?” He repeated, still stricken, shaking his head. “Ah, perhaps something less explicit? I do not wish to give the wrong impression of my intentions.”

“Wise.” Jocasta typed a few more entries, then selected again. “What about the Mrryum Starflower volumes? Starflower is a pseudonym of a male author writing in the voice of an imagined teenaged shepherdess in the throes of…well, excruciating verse, but also love, I suppose.” She clicked through more information. “And, horrifyingly, the poems seem to be intended with teenage girls as the target audience, Force preserve them, so the content rating indicates they should be free of any, ah, clanging love-lyres.”

“Thank the pitiless stars for that.” Dooku murmured. “But Mrryum Starflower seems perfect for my purposes.”

“I sent the reference numbers to you. You’ll have to go out to a bookshop though. Those works aren’t in the Jedi Archives.” That seemed obvious since he was giving the books away as a gift, but Jocasta said it as a point of particular pride, as if she wanted him to know that she had deliberately purged such material from the collection. Maybe she had.

But I'm a self-indulgent brat at heart so here's a little dramatic WIP from an upcoming fic:

“Sy, that’s enough.” Dooku drew Sifo-Dyas’s hands away from scrabbling at the hatch. The door was mechanized; there was no way he could actually open it from the inside while the ship was in flight, but he did not seem to realize he was hurting himself in the attempt. Blood smeared the seam where he had tried to work his fingertips into the gap and pry it open.   “Don't you see? We both just go out.” The seer’s eyes were entirely black from pupil to eyelid, as bright and wild as stars. He sounded almost euphoric. “It fixes everything!”

27 music I listen to while writing

What a fitting question from you in particular, considering I was lucky enough to snag you as a friend over a little chat about playlists! :D In that spirit, I have to share the playlist in question, my general Burning Stars Pure Idiot Vibes playlist. ❤️

[nitrosodiumequilibriumproject]

Continued Spitballing about Equilibrium

From what I understand, our Christmas work is research at our own pace, so when we get back to college, we can start work on our games immediately. First thing first, and this has been plaguing me since I got the idea; centaurs are going to be hard to do. Consider the shape of a centaur. Not only is it weird biologically, but it'll be tough to fit what is essentially two separate animals into a single 32 x 32 box. So of course, I could make the character 64-pixel, but then I have to make everything larger. You'd be surprised the difference in time it takes to create assets in 32 compared to 64. TWL had a lot of thick black lines, and a pretty cartoony look to boot. Nicolas was this stout, bulky absurdification of the human form, Snapsprouts were like velociraptor heads on stalks, and the environment, while being obviously stylised and well-made technically, was also big blocks with harsh comic book-esque outlines to them. That's fine, it was part of the style, but you lose a surprising amount of the canvas in just black lines. Space is a more key part of sprite design than I thought it would be; so a gigantic centaur clogging up the scene is a waste of space. To keep with the theme of humankind's symbiosis with nature, I've chosen another Greek myth, the satyr. A human with horse (but also goat and deer have been used) features, including legs, ears and tails of that animal. I might ditch the gigantic exaggerated erect penis that satyrs were also known for, but I might include their wine-drinking origins as a gameplay mechanic; for example, drinking wine to regain health. My previous idea for a weapon was going to be a basic "whizz-bang" magic fireball, but given that I can now operate within the confines and customs of the saytr myth, I could use pan pipes or something similar. Although, is that too restricting? I can use the imagery and basic ideas of the satyr without forcing myself to retread the paths of Greek myth. Because, simply, my game doesn't take place in ancient Greece, and it's not an analogue for those old tales.

One thing I'm slightly questioning is how exactly I'll show what animals are allies to the player, and what are enemies. Considering you're a creature of the woods, it could be tough to decipher who is on your side in the game. One idea I had was to make the enemies all hunters and marauding knights/conquistadors, not only making your journey more honorable but creating a clear divide of friends and foes. However, this once more restricts me; the enemies will have to be samey, chainmail-clad humans. I might give the two sides strong colour direction; lots of reds and purples for the enemies, to show their violence and corruption. I'm not sure yet.

Also, something I think I already brought up, but I plan for you to refill your health with berries. Just a cool detail.

[totaleditorial]

Brand Building for Burgeoning Poets—Why it Matters and How to Do it Well

The post below is the November 8, 2023 issue of TellTellPoetry.com's newsletter. Sign-up for the newsletter on their website.

Brand Building for Burgeoning Poets—Why it Matters and How to Do it Well

You know your writing is good. Your friends and family adore the samples you’ve shared. Teachers in school wrote notes in the margins of your homework saying things like “Great voice!” and “Your word choice is spectacular.” But now that you’re working on getting people who aren’t in your inner circle (yet) to fall in love with your poetry, you feel overwhelmed. It might seem like standing out among thousands of other talented authors is going to be a near-impossible task, but it doesn’t have to be.

As an emerging author, it’s important to realize that you aren’t just trying to “get your words out there.” Of course, that’s your bread and butter, but your brand is a vital tool that will help you publish your poetry and connect with a wider audience. If you can dial in your unique voice, use consistent themes, personalize your aesthetic, and build authenticity into your persona, you’ll be growing a loyal fanbase before you know it. 

Let’s dive in.

Find and Hone Your Unique Voice

The first step in laying a good foundation for your poetry brand is knowing who you are, and how you sound. Your voice is what sets you apart from other authors, and will ultimately be one of the most important aspects of retaining readership. It’s the way you share personality through the page via syntax, grammar, tone, imagery, rhythm, diction, punctuation, and more. 

Take these poems, for instance:

Tell me it was for the hunger & nothing less. For hunger is to give the body what it knows it cannot keep. That this amber light whittled down by another war is all that pins my hand to your chest.

– Ocean Vuong

I drove all the way to Cape Disappointment but didn’t have the energy to get out of the car. Rental. Blue Ford Focus. I had to stop in a semipublic place to pee on the ground. Just squatted there on the roadside. I don’t know what’s up with my bladder. I pee and then I have to pee and pee again. Instead of sightseeing I climbed into the back seat of the car and took a nap. I’m a little like Frank O’Hara without the handsome nose and penis and the New York School and Larry Rivers. Paid for a day pass at Cape Disappointment thinking hard about that long drop from the lighthouse to the sea. Thought about going into the Ocean Medical Center for a check-up but how do I explain this restless search for beauty or relief?

– Diane Seuss

They descend from the boat two by two. The gap in Angela Davis’s teeth speaks to the gap in James Baldwin’s teeth. The gap in James Baldwin’s teeth speaks to the gap in Malcolm X’s Teeth. The gap in Malcolm X’s teeth speaks to the gap in Malcolm X’s teeth. The gap in Condoleezza Rice’s teeth doesn’t speak. Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard kisses the Band Aid on Nelly’s cheek. Frederick Douglass’s side part kisses Nikki Giovanni’s Thug Life tattoo. The choir is led by Whoopi Goldberg’s eyebrows. The choir is led by Will Smith’s flat top. The choir loses its way. The choir never returns home. The choir sings funeral instead of wedding, sings funeral instead of allegedly, sings funeral instead of help, sings Black instead of grace, sings Black as knucklebone, mercy, junebug, sea air. It is time for war.

– Morgan Parker

Clearly, these authors’ writing styles vary greatly, which affects how we perceive their work. The je ne sais quoi of each writer’s voice ties together the other elements of their writing for truly unique, recognizable work.

Maybe you were lucky enough to find your voice early—if so, congrats! If, like many, you’re still working on it, fear not. There are plenty of ways to strengthen your voice through writing exercises, intentional reading, freewriting, and more. The more you work at it, the more confident you will become in your writing.

If consistent writing isn’t helping, try studying the works of authors with distinct voice and see if you can notice what makes their writing truly theirs. 

Crafting Your Poetry Brand

Once your voice is dialed in, it’s time to focus on how you present yourself and your work. The themes you write about, your style, and your tone should become consistent, so that someone who reads your work can tell you wrote it, even if your name isn’t on the page.

Think of how you want the look of your work to feel. Do you want it to feel like a cozy reading nook? A surf shop? A yoga studio? A greenhouse? A midnight walk down 5th Avenue? Consider your voice, the tone of your writing, and your authentic personality, and match your look to them. Your aesthetics will become part of your calling card across cover art, social media, your website, in-person signage, and beyond, so it’s important to get them right.

Build a Memorable Author Persona

Both online and in person, getting people to want to revisit your work relies on a consistent persona. Social media and (eventually) your website will be key places you engage with your audience. Make sure to respond to comments, reach out to other authors, and cultivate a community around your work. 

Authentic interaction is a huge draw and will not only help grow your audience, but it will make sure your audience is made up of “your people.” You don’t have to turn your life into a 100%-always-on content-fest, but make sure that the content you do share isn’t overly polished. Just be real with people and they’ll respect it. Relatability is rad.

Of course you’ll need to extend your persona beyond the internet, but being consistent with your brand at in-person events isn’t tricky if you’re being yourself (again…just be real and people will respect it). You’ll attract the type of people you want reading your poetry much more easily this way than if you try to be someone you’re not.

Need some inspiration? Check out these website for a few stellar examples of authors who have crafted an authentic online experience that reflects who they are. Note the continued elements between social pace and website, as well as what each does differently:

Chen Chen Website | Social

Sam Payne Social

Marya Layth Website | Social

So You Built a Brand. What Next?

You honed your voice, you put together a killer aesthetic, and you’re starting to see your audience grow. Using this personal brand as a foundation, shift your focus to getting your work in front of as many eyes as possible. Luckily, there are plenty of avenues to explore. Whether you’re marketing a book, a self-published poetry collection, or submitting your work to literature magazines and journals, it’s important to get your writing somewhere people can see it. That can (and should) be done on social media, but make sure to check out local poetry scenes as well as online communities. You’ll make valuable connections with your target audience and maybe even set yourself up for a mutually beneficial collaboration or other project down the road!

Consistency in your branding is key, but consistency in your writing is also key (no surprise there). Getting your brand up and running, and promoting your work afterwards, will be work. But make sure to keep writing with frequency—after all, that’s why you’re ultimately doing this in the first place!

And don’t forget—feedback is your friend. Listen to what others have to say about your style, your look, your tone, etc. Even if it is a criticism, the people you care about just want to see you succeed. Sure, you don’t have to pay attention to trolls on the internet, but if you value someone’s opinion, let them give it to you. 

Get After It.

Alright, that was a lot. But a good lot. Hopefully your mind is bursting with thoughts on what your wonderful brand will one day look, sound, and feel like, but remember, you can take it one step at a time. Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Nail your foundation by establishing your distinct voice, settle in on a “vibe” for your brand, and implement your plan with consistency and authenticity. You’ll reap what you sow here, and we’ve got total faith you’re going to like what you come up with.

Crafted by Liam Norman.

Liam Norman is a midwest-based writer. With a propensity for movement, a passion for exploration, and an insatiable urge to create, storytelling is a natural extension of his interests. When he’s not writing, you can usually find Liam running the trails of Minneapolis, poking around the outdoors, hosting a get-together, or curating a fresh playlist. You can contact Liam at liamrnorman@gmail.com.

The post Brand Building for Burgeoning Poets—Why it Matters and How to Do it Well appeared first on Poetry editing services.

[jellogram]

I have some thoughts about Antichrist (2009). It's not as extreme as I expected. I suspect it gets that reputation just from the genital mutilation, which is pretty gross and graphic, but it's otherwise less violent than something like Saw or Hostel. It's actually a bit slow for the first half but I think that time is needed to solidify how these two characters interact as a couple.

The actors' age gap is pretty noticeable but it adds to their relationship. Dafoe's character is constantly speaking down to Gainsbourg's and treating her like a child. Not in a rough way, but definitely more parental than you'd expect in a marriage. It's well established that she is the unstable one and he is the one trying to stabilize her.

Spoilers beyond this point.

I find it interesting that Gainsbourg's modus operandi with both the child and her husband is to immobilize them. She makes her son unsteady on his feet by having him wear his shoes backwards, and she hobbles Dafoe with the screw after screaming that he's trying to leave her. In both cases she aims not to kill, but to weaken them and make it hard to run. It reminds me a bit of Misery (1990). Something about the suffocating nature of motherly rage or something.

The genital mutilation is also necessary to the themes in my opinion and not there for shock value in any way. I think it's about the connection between sex and death, pleasure and pain, and controlling the id.

Sex and death are tied throughout the movie. The baby bird dies, the fawn is stillborn, the acorns fall and die on the ground, and of course, their child dies while they have sex. Imagery of birth and death is so closely linked that they overlap. This represents the cruelty of nature, and because sex is nature and nature is cruel, genital destruction represents a rejection of nature's cruelty. I don't think it's a coincidence that she mutilates herself after she has lost her mind attacking her husband.

Also if you've only heard one thing about this movie it's probably that Dafoe's actual dick wasn't used for the sex scenes. And not because he refused, but because Lars Von Trier thought Dafoe's penis was too huge that it would be a distraction. So. There's that.

[sylvanas-girlkisser]

Wait wait I'm confused. What do "orc-sized cocks" have to do with black man being killed? Is there some missing context here?

I will admit there's a lot of background knowledge required to see the issue with that particular phrase, as it is, sorta incidentally a culmination of a lot of other issues which, especially if you're from a white and/or sheltered upbringing you might be blind to.

Content warning for discussions of rape and racism.

So, first of all black men have long been (and still are) fetishized as powerful, animalistic and hyper sexual; epitomized through the idea that black men all have abnormally large penises. Intelexual has a really good video about this topic which unfortunately is only available on her patreon, but you can watch the teaser to get a brief rundown of the topic HERE.

This myth about black male sexual prowess has long been used as a way to enact violence upon black men by white people. For example during the time of slavery, white women caught having sex with or straight up raping their slaves would use this myth to paint themselves as victims of the black man's aggression to preserve their "purity" when in reality they of course held ALL the power in the relationship. Similarly, white men would attempt to "prove" their "masculine superiority" over the supposed inherent animalistic masculinity of black men; through acts like castration, buck breaking, and raping married black men's wives. Khadija Mbowe talks a lot about this, such as in THIS VIDEO.

Later a black man having raped a white woman became the go to excuse to justify lynchings, an excuse you still see carry over to this day with the way white (womens) tears are used to weaponize the police against black people. As well as a number of tropes found in interracial and cuckoldry porn.

I feel like it should go without saying but black men aren't genetically predisposed to having incredibly large genitalia (black male sex workers oftentimes wear prosthetic dicks, in order to adhere to the fantasy desired by white audiences).

What does any of this have to do with orcs you ask? Well orcs as a type of fantasy creature, were invented by Tolkien and portrayed (by Tolkien's own admission) using anti-Asian imagery of the time (as well as industrialized imagery more on that later). They were portrayed as short, ugly, cowardly, violent and with a taste for raw meat.

That's a pretty far call from the modern incarnation of orcs, which originated with the hugely (and I cannot emphasize this enough HUGELY) racist creator of DnD: Gary Gygax. He popularized the image of orcs as large, muscular, violent, dimwitted, sexually aggressive creatures with low brows, wide lips and deep voices; who live in tribes and survive by raiding "civilized" cultures. It was only in FIFTH EDITION, they stopped including a line in the half-orc racial description about how the majority of half-orcs are the product of male orcs raping human women.

If you feel like there can be drawn pretty clear parallels between orcs, and racist representations of African cultures, there's a reason for that: Gygax was a completely unapologetic racist. Again, before Gygax, orcs were not tribal, they were industrialist, living in barracks and destroying the environment to fuel their warmachine. LegalKimchi has a really good video about the racism inherent in DnD (and DnD adjacent) worldbuilding, which you can find HERE.

And a lot of the authors that came after Gygax might not have been quite as bad, but they replicated these tropes in order to represent an inherently evil culture so you know, lets not pretend that the fantasy genre for most of its life time hasn't been OVERWHELMINGLY white.

Which brings us back to the infamous "orc sized penis". Because the issue is very specifically with the lack of contextualization in the story in question. The line is dropped off-handedly as the first reference to orcs in the story, with the only context being that it is larger than a large human penis. We have no other knowledge about orcs at this point in the story, it is not expected that we will need more knowledge; that we can use our genre knowledge to extrapolate from this one line what orcs will be in this story - I.E. a stand-in for white womens fetishization of black male bodies, that gives you an easy shield if people accuse you of racism.

Also, lets not pretend that white sapphic communities are immune to this kind of fetishization either, just because it doesn't map one to one on to sapphic material. We have all seen that kind™ of Fareeha Amari content.

Sidenote but speaking of fetishization of black women, Tee Noir has a really good video about that topic, though again mostly focused on heterosexual relationship. You can watch it HERE.

[mrskurono]

Mommy || Choso + Yuji

Tag(s): Mommy Series Continued; tw:incest, tw:age gap (Yuji), mommy kink, nursing, mmf threesome, fingering, squirting/pissing, double vaginal penetration, frotting, breeding kink (kinda), dumbification, dirty talk, lewd imagery below cut

Character(s): Choso (jjk), Yuuji Itadori (jjk)

Choso loved his mother. With everything in him, he loved her.

As the oldest son was always supposed to do. He was her knight in shining armor and he wore that badge proudly. Ready to help mommy whenever she needed it. Keeping that smile on his mother’s face was more important than anything else in his world. Because his world was her.

Rightfully so the oldest taught the youngest the same thing. Yuji was diligent to his big brother. Soaking in his wisdom and making sure to always watch him carefully to know exactly what to do to keep their mom smiling. He saw it too. What Choso saw. Their mother’s smile was his world and Yuji would do anything to keep it on her face.

The exception? Only when her smile was replaced by the fucked out expression on her face.

“Ani-chan.” Yuji’s face red from ear to ear. He had been since his older brother told to hold still for their mother, “It feels-”

“It feels good I know,” Choso nodded, enthralled by the sight of his little brother’s cock disappearing into their mother’s mouth, “Otouto-chan don’t forget we’re here to make mommy feel good too.”

Breath as shaky as his resolve, Yuji finally nodded. Regretful when his cock was pulled from his mother’s warm mouth, “Mommy-”

“-let us make you feel good too-” Unable to not take the lead, Choso brushed his brother aside. Needing to catch his mother’s lips on his own. Not even caring if the taste of Yuji’s cock lingered. He craved her lips every hour of every day. When she would indulge is when he would take the most advantage of it.

Pushing her down. Both boys were on her in an instant. Yuji replacing his older brother’s lips on hers. And Choso running kisses all down her neck and shoulder. More experienced in the curves of his mother’s body, Choso intended to teach Yuji just as much about this as he did everything else in the house. Mom’s happiness was always number one.

“Touch her breasts Otouto-chan.” Choso instructed softly. One of his broad hands already kneading away at the wonderful mounds, “She likes it a lot if you pinch her nipples too.”

“Like this Ani-chan?” Yuji mimicked what he saw him do. Hands nearly as big as Choso’s. Still though the little brother wasn’t about ready to supersede his big brother.

No need for his brother’s approval. It was when their mother’s legs squeezed and she rubbed them together. Moaning as both boys touched her breasts without hesitation. Yuji was slowly understanding what Choso meant by knowing her body.

They leaned forward. Together taking her nipples in their watering mouths. Nursing at her breast like they were infants again. Yuji’s eyes closed in the heat of the moment. But Choso looked up at her with adoring eyes. No need for her to even see him. It was enough for Choso to watch his beloved mother drowned in pleasure.

To stay at her breast was selfish though. And this time was for her and her alone. Choso reluctantly pulled his lips off her breast. Nudging Yuji to do the same. He pouted but complied. Knowing his big brother knew best.

“There’s one place,” Choso smiled sweetly, “That mommy likes touched more than anything else. Would you like me to show you that?” Not even up for debate as Yuji nodded eagerly, “Good.”

Dragging his palms down her navel. Choso watched his mother react perfectly to his touch. Bucking her hips up under him until his palm came to rest on her groin. Covering all of her slightly untrimmed mound with just one big hand. Both boys got between her legs and Yuji licked his lips expectantly waiting for Choso to move his hand.

Of course when Choso pulled his hand away. It wasn’t without dragging his fingers down through his mother’s glistening folds. The tips of his fingers grazing her sensitive clit enough to make her grab at the sheets under them with a white knuckled grip.

“See.” Choso presented his went fingers to his little brother, “She likes it so much when we spoil her body that mommy makes this delicious juice for us to lick.”

“I can lick it?” Yuji’s eye lit up at the idea of it. He then got Choso pressing his fingers to his lips for a taste. No hesitation to open wide and suck their mother’s wetness from his brother’s fingers.

When Choso finally drew his fingers from his little brother’s mouth. He  noticed how wet Yuji had left them. Knowing how much mother loved to have herself stretched, he felt the honor of using Yuji’s spit this first time was well earned, “Watch.” Choso instructed. Pressing his fingers back into her core.

Yuji as hard as he could be. Noticing Choso was too. But they would wait their turn because Yuji couldn’t take his eyes off the way his brother’s first two fingers sunk knuckles deep into their mother’s cunt.

“She took them both!” Yuji leaned forward enthralled. Choso’s fingers now gone inside her and the only sign of their movement was her bucking and moaning above. Each swipe and twitch of her eldest baby’s fingers inside her caused spasms throughout her body.

Choso desperately wanted to be closer. Back in the warmth of his mother’s most private parts. His cock twitching with anticipation at the thought of his cock filling his mommy’s pretty cunny with his seed as he always did. Still though he had to wait.

“Put your mouth here,” Choso pointed at the budding clit peaking out of the woman’s folds, “Mom loves to have it sucked. It’s supposed to feel even better than your penis in her mouth.”

Little Yuji’s eyes wide he inhaled the musky scent of the juices being stirred up by his big brother’s fingers, “What is it...?”

“That’s her clit,” Choso smiled sweetly, slipping another finger in to the two already in her, “Suck mommy’s clit and she’ll give you something.”

At the idea of a reward, Yuji was eager and quick to latch his lips onto the bud. Slick and slimy in his mouth from the gush of juices. He wasted no time swiping his tongue around and slipping just the tip of his tongue up under the hood of her clit to see what exactly it was Choso said was a reward.

Neither hand to wait long. Between Choso’s three fingers stuffed in their mommy’s cunt. And Yuji’s nursing of her clit. He got to see first hand the body wracking orgasm take over their normally quiet mom. To really drive it home Choso pressed his free hand hard onto her stomach and Yuji’s eyes popped open when he saw the golden spray gush over his brother’s hand.

Thick and muskier than before. When she finally stopped squirming under them. And Yuji took his lips from her swollen clit. He was even more excited, “What was that??”

“Mommy’s specials pee,” Choso still didn’t remove his fingers after his mother’s gift to him, “It means we made her feel good. Here-” He moved over a bit, “Put your fingers in here with me to see what her insides feel like heaven.”

“Won’t it be too much?” Yuji asked, already seeing her twitch around Choso’s three fingers.

“We have to stretch her out so she feels good when we show her how much we love her.” He insisted.

Under his big brother’s directions. Yuji tentatively put a finger against the slick pooling in his brother’s palm. Gathering enough of it that when he pushed in alongside Choso’s fingers. Yuji was met with only a little resistance. Instantly getting the gratification of his mother’s warm wet cunt walls swallowing him up. It was obvious on his face as Choso chuckled at him.

“We came outta here??” Yuji said almost not believing something so wonderful could push a human out of it.

“We did and it feels so much better being back inside too.” Choso mused with a soft smile. His eyes locked in on the sight of four fingers violating his mother’s cunt. Encouraging Yuji to add another after he saw her creaming around their combined effort.

The lovely sight of both of them massaging her entrance until it was gaping. Like her walls wanted to suck their fingers back in. All Choso could focus on was the aching strain in his cock as he longed to be back inside her. It wasn’t until Yuji had another three of his fingers paired with Choso’s three did he think she was finally stretched enough.

“Since this is your first time making mommy happy,” Choso slowly drew his fingers from his mother’s now gaping cunt, “You can be behind her and follow my lead Otouto-chan.”  

“Behind here?” Yuji still a little dazed from just the way his fingers felt inside his mother, “Where do you go?”

Choso smiled and leaned down to kiss his mother’s navel, “I go under her, as the oldest I’ll always be the one to support mother.”

Excited by what this meant. Yuji was little help in getting into position. What he did help with was when their mother was on top of Choso. Able to hook his hands in her hips the strong little brother hefted his mother up so she was on her knees. Choso praised him for his gentle touch. Reminding him that mother was to be cherished and always shown a soft loving touch.

“Do we take turns? Or...?” Yuji was unsure as he looked at his mother’s twitching cunt spasm around nothing. The way he wanted to bury his cock in her was unreal. So warm and soft as he thought about what he felt around his fingers just now. Desiring nothing more than to be back where Choso said he came from.

Choso, who didn’t get his mother on top of him without kissing her tenderly as he cupped her face. Ended the kiss only after tucking his wonderful mother’s face against his chest and reaching down to gently grab her ass, “We can together. She would very much love that. Having both her boys back where we came from.”

Under close instructions, Yuji sat back on his haunches, cock in hand. Pumping himself slowly as he watched his big brother. Choso very gently swiped his cock up his mother’s slit. Wetting his tip with the slick glistening off her lips. Earning but a meager moan when the tip of his cock grazed her clit. Yuji watched enthralled as that simple motion made her entrance twitch like there was something in her. Only to be followed by Choso pressing the tip of his cock against her entrance.

Slowly and carefully he urged their mother onto his entire length. Just as his fingers had disappeared. Now every inch of his cock was hidden within the twitching walls of their mother’s cunt.

“How....does it feel?” Yuji leaned forward, feverishly squeezing his cock trying not to cum yet as precum oozed from his swollen tip.

An audible sigh from Choso. Like his entire body relaxed. With long arms coming up around to hug their mother close to his body, Choso pressed his lips to the side of her head just to take a deep breath. Filling his senses completely. Sweet floral scent of her hair. Warmth of her skin. And the way her squishy walls sucked more of his cock in. Like her body wanted more of him. Choso hated this was all he could give her but still reveled in every second of it.

“Like heaven,” Choso murmured. Soaking in the pleasure just for a moment before returning to his big brother duties.

As he had said, Choso intended to guide Yuji through this just as he started. Letting go of the hug held on the woman. He thrusted up a little to get her to stay on her knees a little more. Not without the guttural moan that left her lips that made both boy’s breathing catch in their chests. Nothing was as beautiful as that lewd noise. Even Choso hearing it a thousand times couldn’t stop loving it. He had a duty though and needed to focus.

“Here,” Choso’s hands returned to their mother’s ass, “Just like your fingers, press yourself into her slowly so mommy can adjust.”

Finally given the signal he was waiting for. Yuji lined his hips up with his mother’s. Smearing his precum along her slit and the underside of Choso’s cock as much as he was wetting his cock down with her juices. When he thought he was sufficently wet enough, Yuji pressed the tip of his cock against his brother’s larger one and the tightness of his mother’s entrance.

“It’s too tight...” Yuji met some resistance and was unsure how far to go.

“Keep pushing,” Choso encouraged, “I’ve got her so everything is alright.”

With his approval Yuji pressed much harder into his mother’s core until there was almost a pop. And suddenly his tip was swallowed up with the warm of her core swallowing him and the surprisingly pleasant sensation of his brother’s cock rubbing against his own.

Reminded not to wait too long. Choso told Yuji to press all the way into her so she could adjust properly. So his little brother did just that. Stuffing his cock inside his mother’s overstretched pussy. Tighter than anything he felt with his fingers. Yuji for a split second wondered if he was loosing his mind with how tight and warm his mother’s most intimate part felt around his cock. Taking a moment even as he put his hands on her hips and just bowed his head trying to compose himself.

“T-Tight-” Was all Yuji could manage.

A deep hum in his chest while Choso nodded in agreement. He knew how good the walls of his mother’s cunt felt. What he hadn’t bargained for was how amazing his little brother’s cock would feel grinding against his own inside those pleasurable walls.

“Move slowly-” Choso groaned, unable to finish his entire sentence before Yuji pulled back to thrust his cock in along side his brothers.

Their mother a quivering mess under them as her juices leaked around both her boy’s cocks.

“I’m in mom’s pretty cunt-” Yuji hardly could get half a stroke in from the tightness, “Back where I came from- Fuck- ani-chan you were so right.” He swallowed hard as the sensation of their mother’s walls fluttered around him in the unknown sensation of one of her orgasms, “I wanna fuck mommy’s pretty little cunt all the time. I wanna go back from where I came ani-chan.”

Smiling to himself, Choso had wrapped his arms around his mother once more. Introducing his own in timed strokes with his little brother’s. When Yuji would pull out is when Choso would push in. Leaving no second their mother wasn’t full of her boy’s cocks going in and out of her. And the grinding of their own dicks against one another was a sensation totally new and wonderful.

The way Yuji’s balls slapped against the underside of Choso’s cock with each rut into their mother. And Choso’s thick cock head grinding against Yuji’s as his big brother thrusted back into her. It was so much and so wonderful that both boys were guilty of forgetting their mother’s pleasure in leu of their own.

That was ok though. With both boy’s inside her. Pressing places she never knew she had and stretching her out more than anything. Their mother was a bundle of nerves cumming over and over again on her boys cocks. Soon becoming numb as they fucked another orgasm out of her. Dumb and drooling on top of her eldest. It really was Choso’s job to hold his mother up until both of them gave her their gifts.

"Ani-can-" Yuji's voice cracked. Giving it away he wasn't going to last much longer, "Ani-chan I'm gonna-"

"Give mommy all of it-" Choso grunted. Forceful thrusts up into their mother's cunt to push her back onto his brother's cock. Just as his own orgasm was coming up quicker than he anticipated, "Give mommy your all, love her with all of you."

A pleasurable cry, Yuji's toes curling and hips rutting into their mother, he slammed his cock as deep as possible into her. Giving into the warmth of his mother's cunt as Yuji's cum spilled inside her. Seeping into her deepest parts. Spilling onto his big brother's cock as well. Yuji's moans filled the room as his twitching orgasm was drawn out by his cock being milked dry by her cunt.

Just as the tightest did him in. When Yuji's cum spread into her deepest parts. And Choso could feel then slippery wetness of his brother's seed coating his cock along with his mother's juices as well. It was too much even for the oldest brother.

Choso pressed his lips against his mother's. Disregarding her hardly aware enough to kiss him back. It didn't matter Choso groaned against her lips and jolted his hips hard up against his mother's. Washed over once and for all with the familiar warmth taking over him. Cock spasming in his mother's warmth and against his brother's. Choso added his load to the mixture all at once.

Finally when both boys came down from their high. It was Yuji to slip out of his mother. A small flood of cum following him. But not all of it as Choso's cock remained buried inside her. And where it would stay as Choso eased his mother's weary body down against his own. Holding her close as he wasn't sure if she'd passed out or not finally. He kissed the side of her head and stroked her hair gently as he savored the feeling of his and Yuji's cum still inside their mother. A gift so intimate he wished never to have to pull out.

"We get to do that with mom again?" Yuji asked with a twinge of excitement even if he was laid out next to them catching his breath.

Smiling to himself. Hearing how enthusiastic his little brother was. Choso knew if the day ever came he needed someone else to watch after their mother. That Yuji would indeed do him proud.

"Of course we do," Choso muttered into his mother's hair. Holding her to him as his cock softened inside her, "It's our duty as her sons to love her with everything we have. Always."

[theodorebasmanov]

As you could have noticed, my watching of Starkid musicals was a little unorganized. This has to come to an end, so I decided to watch all the rest of those musicals in chronological order. Which tells us that the post about “Black Friday” will appear in exactly twenty-four weeks, that’s just science. This time, I’ve watched “Me and My Dick”. Joe Walker plays genitals… Devil, help me through this, please, I’m not sure if I can survive so many jokes below the belt. I should establish one thing first: I’m going to use as little colloquial as possible, which means I’ll use the words “penis” and “vagina” instead of everything. I don’t know if I have to retell the plot, but let’s try. Joey, in high-school, has a crush on a popular girl. His sexual drive is a little over the top as it pretty often happens with teenagers (at least, media tell us so). There’s also an unpopular girl - Sally, who has a crush on the main character. (Spoilers!) Joey gets a chance to have sex with his crush, but his penis loves Sally’s vagina, so doesn’t work. Joey argues with his penis and the last runs away. Joey acquaintances with his heart, tries to propose to his crush, fails (of course), then Sally confesses her love to him, he also says that he loves her, but it everything goes wrong when the penis doesn’t come out (because he’s just not there). Sally's vagina with the help of Vagina Council finds Joey’s penis among the “free” penises and helps him to reunite with Joey. Joey and his penis confess love to Sally. Everybody’s happy. Well… On the one hand, some of the jokes were funny and, expectably, the whole thing is pretty sex-positive. On the other hand, there was some slut-shaming (if I misunderstood, you are welcome to prove me wrong), some jokes weren’t good at all and sometimes they did fight the idea that men always want to have sex and women never do and sometimes they didn’t, so I was confused. The thing that doesn’t apply to the musical itself, but to the recording the sound was very unregulated. There’s also one thing I don’t know how to feel about: a friend of the main character’s crush, who most clutching was aimed for, lost her vagina – she ran to Europe with her first penis, who was one of the “free” penises, but as I said, at the end everybody’s happy – she meets another “free” penis and unite with him. Well, some trans/intersex positivity never hinders, but it was weird. The whole experience was odd, but in general, was okay. P.S. I was going to compare the idea of the show with “Wiener vs. Brain” by the author of “Long Story Short” (you probably saw it, back in the day), but then found out that the first episode came out in 2014 when the musical was produced in 2009, which means Starkid was first. P.P.S. You should be grateful, that I didn’t mention my problems which I could have brought up in connection with the topic of that musical.

(Gifs contain genitals related imagery.)

[wittyvitale]

Names (A Trepha-Focused Castlevania Drabble)

Summary:  Sypha is expecting her first child and has a conversation with Trevor about possible names.

Author’s Note/Warning:  So in addition to some fluff, there's also mild discussion about sex/penis spells and some graphic violent imagery consistent with the series. I also included some of my OC Belmont and Belnades ancestors. Enjoy!

Sypha, who was 7 months pregnant, curled up on Trevor’s lap and rested her head in the crook of his neck.

“We still need to talk about names, Trevor,” Sypha started. “I know you want to name our child after one of your Belmont ancestors. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

Trevor looked up and hummed in thought. “Yeah, I have been thinking about that. If it’s a boy, I’d like to go with Christopher, after my great uncle.”

Sypha frowned. “Wasn’t your Uncle Christopher the one who had trouble getting an erection and constantly needed to use the penis spell book?”

“No no, that was my Uncle Frederick. He was kind of an asshole. Never stopped talking about his bloody limp dick, really pissed off my Aunt Marie. No, Uncle Christopher was the one who single-handedly defeated 3 water dragons and barely got a scratch. A true Belmont warrior.”

“Well in that case, I like the name Christopher. How about for a girl?”

“Sonia. Definitely Sonia,” Trevor said with no doubt in his voice whatsoever. “After my Grandmother, who we all called Nana Sonia.”

Sypha smiled. “Sounds like Nana Sonia was very special to you, Trevor. I would like to hear more about her.”

“She was special, all right. One of the toughest women I ever met in my life. Hell of a monster hunter. She took me out on one of my first hunts when I was about 10. We were ambushed by a fire drake, and since I was still new to the hunts, it took me off guard. He knocked the short sword out of my hand and slammed me against a tree. I remember going in and out of consciousness and seeing the fire drake towering over me. I really thought I was done for. But here comes Nana Sonia, and do you know what she did?”

“What, what did she do?” Sypha asked, completely invested in the story.

“Nana Sonia took out her short sword and sliced the fire drake’s dick off. Just cut it clean off like the way you chop a carrot. And that wasn’t all. Nana Sonia took that severed dick and shoved it right into the fire drake’s throat. He screamed for a long time, tried to breath more fire, but the dick was lodged in too deep. Eventually he choked on his own dick and died. And that was when Nana Sonia became my favorite family member. That was also the day I learned that I should never fuck with Nana Sonia.”

Sypha’s mouth hung wide open in amazement. “My god, what a story! She sounds like quite a woman. Were all of the women in the Belmont family that skilled with weapons and combat?”

Trevor nodded. “Even if the Belmont women decided that monster hunting wasn’t what they wanted to dedicate their lives to, they were all trained on how to use the whip and the sword. That’s Belmont tradition, regardless of gender. The Belmonts never believed in that whole “traditional gender roles” bullshit the church put out. Our women were just as strong as the men, if not stronger. I mean, Nana Sonia could cut off your dick for Christ’s sake.”

“The Speakers feel much the same way about gender,” Sypha started. “The church believes that women are inferior to men and therefore must be subservient to men. Speakers believe that all genders are equal. We even have a few in our ranks who don’t use a gender at all.”

“Speaking of, are there any names you have your heart set on, Sypha?” Trevor asked. “We’ve only been taking about the Belmonts. How about the Belnades clan? You said sometime ago that you wanted to raise at least one Speaker magician.”

Sypha looked up thoughtfully. “When Speaker Magicians marry outside of their tribes and reproduce, there’s only a 30% chance that the child will possess any magic power. The mother can feel the magic in the womb as early as 3 months. This child I’m carrying now… I don’t feel any magic power. This child is more Belmont than Belnades. It doesn’t mean we’ll never have a child with magic power, but that is not the destiny of this little one.”

Trevor hummed thoughtfully. “We’ll have a little Belnades eventually. It may take a few tries, but I’m up for it if you are.” He said the last sentence with a grin. Sypha grinned back.

“Well of course! We’re definitely having more than one child, and one of them will be a Speaker Magician, I know it already!”

“So what names are you thinking of for our little Speaker Magician?”

Sypha shifted her body so she could lay on Trevor’s lap. “I’d probably name our child after my parents. My parents had beautiful, lyrical names. Alma for a girl and Lorenzo for a boy. I could also name a boy after my grandfather, Mateo. Our Belnades baby would be an amazing magician just like their mama. And they will practice their magic by setting their papa’s hair on fire while he sleeps.”

Trevor gave a low chuckle and began gently stroking his wife’s swollen belly. “Honestly, I’ve been woken up in worse ways.”

Sypha reached up to comb her fingers through Trevor’s hair with a yawn.

“But no matter what the baby’s gender is or what they grow up to be, I know they’re going to be amazing.” Sypha said in a contented purr.

“Because they’re ours?” asked Trevor.

Sypha closed her eyes and continued smiling. “Because they’re ours.”

[charliejrogers]

Under the Skin (2014) - Review

For a lot of science fiction movies, I find myself enjoying the ideas of the film more than I think I actually enjoyed the film. It’s what I’ll refer to as the Annihilation-syndrome, named after the 2018 movie that I found to be an absolute bore while also being an exceedingly intellectually stimulating discussion about the nature of cancer, mutation, and biology in general. The film I am reviewing now, 2014’s Under the Skin, honestly is nowhere near as unenjoyable as Annihilation, but I mention the film because I think much of this review will focus on the really interesting ideas this movie brought up which might make you think I thought this is a masterpiece. It’s not. It’s good, very good even, but not as good as its theme and ideas.

A lot of my restrained enthusiasm has to do with the fact that the film is purposefully cryptic and full of esoteric imagery. While there are spoken parts, I don’t think much would be lost if we couldn’t hear what was being said. That is to say, the dialogue doesn’t do much to make sense of what we are seeing displayed on screen.In fact, there are large sections of characters interacting without any dialogue, yet everything is understood.

To its credit, what we are seeing is largely very beautiful from a cinematography point of view. Much of the film takes place in the city of Edinbugh, Scotland and it captures well the urban grit of the city and how our protganoist fits well within that urban environment. The way the red lights of Edinburgh’s traffic lighst cast a foreboding, menacing band over the protagonist’s eyes as she drives about town on the hunt for men to ensnare in her trap shows that this dangerous character is right at home in the anonymity of the city.

The protagonist is played by Scarlett Johansson, who spends most of the film alternating between being the pinnacle of seduction in the eyes of the heterosexual male gaze and being a lifeless void. That’s because Johansson plays an alien (I think) or at the very least a humanoid being who seems to have the sole purpose of finding lonely men, taking them back to her lair, and trapping them in a sunken-place-like void where ultimately everything but their skin is extracted from them. I’ll henceforth refer to this character simply as “the humanoid” with she/her pronouns for clarity. We never learn the humanoid’s motivations, but we know that she’s not acting alone. She’s supported in her ventures by a (presumably) humanoid motorcycle gang who also double as agents who will clean up her messes.

At the beginning of the film, the humanoid appears to have no free will or consciousness. When she comes across her first dead body, she is more interested with the ant crawling along the body than the woman who used to inhabit that body. She simply steals that woman’s clothes, and begins acting out what seems like a pre-designed course for finding and trapping men. As soon as she has completed an interaction with a human, all of the emotion drains straight out of her face. Johansson’s face takes on a scary lifelessness on par with Billy Skarsgård’s Pennywise the clown from the It movies. There’s a scene where the humanoid, in the process of attracting a new victim, stumbles across an infant that has been abandoned at the beach and is screaming out. Perhaps the director is toying with audiences’ biases that the humanoid, appearing as she does as a human woman, will “naturally” want to reach out and save this baby. That she doesn’t seems to signal to the highest degree that this “woman” is no woman at all, but a cold, merciless something else.

Yet, somehow, by the end of this movie, I found all my sympathies lying entirely with this decidedly inhuman killing machine who makes her living preying on people just like me. This is because something happens that changes the humanoid about midway through the movie. Up to that point, it would be easy to classify the film as a feminist revenge fantasy, where men’s penchant for objectifying women and their aggressive desire to “conquer” women is met with a dish that is served so very coldly. It’s oddly satisfying to watch men who will blindly get into a car with a complete stranger and follow her into a creepy house just because they want to fuck her, end up being exposed as little more than skin around a bag of meat.

But then the humanoid comes across a man whose face deviates greatly from the norm due to some unnamed medical condition. It very much resembles the face of the protagonist from The Elephant Man. He is out an a walk at night to the grocery store. The humanoid doesn’t see him like the rest of the world does. She doesn’t understand how insensitive her genuine question about why he shops at night might be to him. In a darkly ironic sense, she’s the first person in his life to truly see him as a man and not a hideous monster. He has none of the arrogant sexual bravado like the humanoid’s prior victims. He’s sexually innocent, a virgin. When she offers to take him back to her place, he doesn’t take pride in any successful conquest. We see that he’s pinching himself just to prove that he’s not dreaming. It’s a heartbreaking sequence. Whereas we may have been on board, at least symbolically, with the humanoid’s cool takedown of the patriarchy, this particular abduction flips the script. Our sympathies lie more with the man than the “woman.”

Why he doesn’t succumb to the same fate as the other men is not clear. Notably, he’s the first we’ve seen that isn’t fully erect despite the humanoid ardent attempts at seduction. Secondly, he’s like the first to take some stock of the fact that he’s been lured into some black void from another dimension. He obviously finds Johansson attractive, but it’s almost like he is more amazed by what is happening, his penis “disarmed” so to speak, compared to those who came before him who were “armed” to conquer. And in lacking their sexual aggression, he was deemed to have a “lighter”, purer heart, preventing him from sinking into the deep of her trap.

This seems to change the humanoid. It’s as if she questions her whole purpose in life up to that point. Maybe all those men who had come before were as gentle as sweet as this one. Or maybe she yearns to be more than a monster.

Previously we had seen the humanoid stare at women from her car in much the same she looked at men, yet we never see her take women as a victim. It’s more like she was curious by these creatures, like she didn’t know they would be there. She shows the same curiosity towards her own body. She stares at it, hugs her curves. Just after her encounter with the man with the dysmorphic face, she looks long at her face in the mirror and then at a fly stuck to a window. It’s as if she’s looking at how she looks to others (humanoid) compared to what she really is (more like a bug, an alien). As the film goes on, it’s almost as if she’s trying to convince herself the skin is not a farce, that it’s really her, that she’s real, and that there’s nothing else under the skin. There’s an ironic beauty in the dysmorphic man wanting to be seen for what’s on the inside where she wants to be seen for her outside.

We subsequently see the humanoid undergo something of a coming-of-age as she flees into the more rural surroundings of the bogs of Scotland, presumably to avoid her motorcycle-driving allies who don’t want her to veer off course. The camera work in this part of the film highlights her as a stranger in this strange land, with her hot pink sweater standing in stark contrast to the drab Scottish milieu. And truly from the rocky/pebbly beach below the impossibly high bluffs at the ocean to the Mars-like desert shrubbery of the bogs, Scotland has never made Earth look so alien. Yet it’s in this foreign land, far from the trappings of the dirty city that the humanoid experiences the pleasure of being a human, or more specifically being a woman. For a few days she is even one man’s princess, and I think it confuses her so much that she enjoys it.

The genius of this film is the way it makes you forget that the humanoid isn’t actually human. In the latter half of the movie we celebrate her cautious steps towards humanity. There is a love scene that is among the most intimate I’ve seen filmed. Yet, we also fear for her and feel sorry for her when her fantasy comes crashing down and it is revealed to her and to us that her initial approach to men proves was much more appropriate.

This is a slow film that rewards patience, but ultimately it doesn’t do much to excite. There are abstract sequences of light and color accompanied by discordant sounds of chanting that seem straight out of the Jupiter sequence from 2001: A Space Odyssey. These do little more than confuse, and sometimes bore. And even if the lack of excitement is deliberate (perhaps intended to deconstruct female seduction) that doesn’t make it anymore enjoyable. Still, it is a beautifully shot picture that provides a stunning condemnation of our male dominated society. It would manage to make even the most bitter-hearted viewer feel sympathy for a humanoid who just a half-hour ago was on a cold-blooded murder streak. Still, even if it doesn’t introduce any hard-hitting questions about humanity like the best sci-fi, in the end it revels in a different dominant theme of sci-fi: no matter the monster man meets, man is always the ultimate monster.

 *** (Three out of four stars)

[chibivesicle]

Golden Kamuy 244 & 245.  The players continue to converge on something.

Chapters 244 and 245 are clearly set up chapters for the next ‘big’ thing that is going to happen in the manga.

I am happy to see that Sofia has returned and has made her way to Otaru! The chapter starts out with a flashback from when Sofia met Gansoku and Svetlana.  She was able to learn that they met Asirpa after Kiro was killed and that she wanted to return to Otaru to visit her Huci.

She’s made it to the port town with her men and she’s come prepared with rifles.  They have some Vetterli M1881′s so not the newest tech compared to the type 38s that the 27th has.  What I love is that in a few panels her compassion and love for her men is so clear.

When she is told that another man has collapsed due to nutritional deficiencies like scurvy and beriberi, she will find a doctor to take care of them. Scurvy is a result of a vitamin C deficiency as it prevents proper crosslinking of collagen fibers.

Beriberi is comes from a result of eating overly refined or simple food.  It was actually a huge problem for the early modern Japanese military as people shifted from eating brown rice (less processed more nutritional value) to white rice (empty calories to an extent).  But I digress, the important thing here is that Sofia will make sure her men are well!

The action shifts to Tsukishima and Koito.  They are playing a game called Menko (I’ll just roll with it) and Tsukishima seems to be taking it very seriously.

Since I pretty much know nothing about this nor if this is a proper activity for a young officer and a Sergent that is over 30, I will defer to Sei Kobiyama.  Sei seems to indicate that they are acting like young children and this likely was started by Koito.  Here are a series of comments on what this could mean.

I am going to agree with Sei Kobiyama’s take on this.  Koito is holding onto a childish activity and it likely is how he wants others to spoil him like his older brother did.  Tsukishima seems to be happy that he won back a card and Koito smacks him with another card in anger. He is acting like a brat, since he could do this with his brother who, previously, we estimated would have been the same age as Tsukishima.

Koito is seething (but he is also a very competitive man) and he tries to goad Tsukishima into going easy on him for not playing politics to help those ‘above’ him advance their own careers and in turn his own.

Tsukishima then instinctively feels something that activates his sense of danger.  As he turns it reveals - Sofia!  She’s so angry as they both seem confused as they see her.

She then turns away and it is interesting that Koito asks Tsukishima if he knows her  He admits that he doesn’t know her, but his instinct tells Koito to stay away from her as she seems dangerous. 

I wonder if this is foreshadowing to an eventual Koito and Sofia meet up.  Long ago (in meta terms) I had really wanted Sofia to meet Koito and to have a discussion on how to lead men.  This was also based on the fact that all officers speak foreign languages and we still don’t know which one Koito knows.  He doesn’t know Russian like Tsukishima, Ogata or Tsurumi.  As @goldenkamuyhunting​ and Merdopseudo have pointed out, the Japanese government followed the French for many things including military organization.  We also know that Koito got his motorized tricycle from France.  It seems that he should speak French and we know for a fact that Sofia can speak French. 

What is important is we finally learn more about what Sofia saw during Kiro’s last stand.  Sure enough, she knows that Koito and Tsukishima were directly involved in his death, what is interesting is the wound from Tanigaki isn’t considered . . .

But unlike Koito, or Tanigaki, or Sugimoto, she does not rush in to attack them.  Instead, she controls her emotions and continues to look for a doctor for her ill men and learn how to meet up with Asirpa.  This means that Asirpa’s comment on the ice floe was correct.  Sofia will find her when she will need/want to.  Sofia - she’s one of the best leaders in the entire series.  Educated, compassionate, competent, understanding of many different sides!  What is clear is that she will play a role in the tiger curse on Koito/Tsukishima and hopefully Tanigaki.  Sorry Tanigaki, I never respected your quest for revenge when Inkarmat lived and gave birth to a daughter as well.

Tsukishima then tells Koito that they now have orders to head to Sapporo from Otaru and to wait for Tsurumi’s arrival.  Koito seems nervous and almost hesitant as he doesn’t respond.  Tsukishima seems worried as he speaks before Koito has a menko card he made with Tsurumi.  Those are some decent drawing skills there Koito, and the poppies in the background are a nice touch if I say so myself.

Koito’s face seems conflicted here.  I’ll willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that Koito’s former Tsurumi obsession has become a facade that he must maintain.  I mean, if all of a sudden when Koito were to meet him post-injury and not fanboy Tsurumi, Tsurumi would be even more suspicious.  I hope Koito is trying to move forward, yet still sort things out.

The action in the chapter then goes to Sapporo where Toni and Ushiyama are out and about.  Ushiyama hears Ueji as he’s trying to do something bad to a kid.  All in all, Ueji is not a character that I like.  I was cringing the entire time he was talking to the young boy about finding his lost dog.  I don’t care about his serial killer personal philosophy so I’m just ignoring most of the information about him.

Instead, we learn about the enjoyment he gets out of disappointing others.  This comes from a random comment by Boutarou.  We learn that Boutarou had an aunt, but she was a proper lady and ashamed of his actions as a relative.

It is clear that Boutarou did have an aunt like this as he wanted her to visit him.  Ushiyama later tells him that he never saw this woman who looked like his aunt.  So the sightings of her were a fabrication by Ueji, but the fact that he was disappointed to know it was a lie tells us that he did have an aunt at some point in time.

It just lets us know that Ueji lives on others disappointments.  We know that Boutarou’s aunt never visited and it hurt him to realize that she didn’t care for him.

The chapter goes back to the boy finding his dog decapitated, the head in Ueji’s box and he then begins to strangle the boy to death. 

Yay!

Okay, so that was clearly sarcasm, but thankfully Ushiyama appears and is ready to destroy Ueji.

Chapter 245 has a full color title page featuring Ariko, Kikuta and Tsurumi.

Tsurumi is clearly a reference to religious imagery as a Virgin Mary stand in. A beam of sunlight beams on him with his hands held up in prayer.  As a recovering catholic, I didn’t even need to think twice about what this is showing with Tsurumi in a field of rifles.

As the title is that this is the town of reunions, it refers to Ariko and Kikuta; I wonder if this means they will be playing a greater role in future events?  I am guessing this color title page will become important as the Sapporo arc continues more.

The chapter starts out with Ushiyama saving the small boy as he calls out Ueji.  Noda serves us several pages of Ushiyama being, well Ushiyama.  Briefly distracted by a ploy about a woman’s breasts from Ueji isn’t quite enough to allow him to escape and he gets face planted with due to his braided hair.  Ushiyama rips out some of his hair and seems less than deterred.  After taking quite a beating, Ueji tries to beg his way out of the punishment.

He tries to tempt Ushiyama with something amazing that has to do with the gold, yet it pretty much falls on deaf ears.  Ushiyama’s translated reply of “sure, sure” doesn’t really give him much confidence.

It is clear by Ueji’s statement that things aren’t fun with Ushiyama, means he’s never been able to bewitch him with his silver tongue unlike other convicts.  He flees the best he can, but Ushiyama is a tank.  He walks through a wall and continues undeterred catching the attention of Kadokura and Hijikata.

Of course the reunion is about to happen as Sugimoto, Asirpa, Shiraishi, Boutarou and Vasily are enjoying some curry at the restaurant that they previously visited in Sapporo.  I have to admit it is adorable that Boutarou has his hair tied up all proper for dinner and Vasily looks like Simo Hayha with his face uncovered.  Sugimoto knocks his spoon over and as he bends over misses Ueji tossed through the wall by Ushiyama.

Despite all of the commotion, Boutarou is able to keep his bowl of curry and continue eating through the action, while somehow a bowl lands perfectly on Shiraishi’s head.  The side eye that Vasily is giving Boutarou is clearly some silent Slavic judgement. 

One clearly does not come between Boutarou and a meal.  Asirpa is beyond happy to see Ushiyama as she is almost in tears at the reappearance of her professor penis.

Due to the shock the bowl falls off of Shiraishi’s head and Sugimoto is all of a sudden more concerned as if Ushiyama is nearby, he knows Hijikata can’t be far behind.

And Hijikata isn’t too keen on Sugimoto as he’s really a hindrance to Hijikata’s quest for the gold to create his Republic of Ezo.  So being the tactician (and ass) that he is, Hijikata goes all out to take out Sugimoto. 

Many readers of the manga are always upset when other characters attack Sugimoto, but out of the entire cast he is the biggest impediment to all the factions getting the gold.  He is the least loyal;  he has swapped sides from himself with Asirpa, to working with Hijikata to working for Tsurumi and now he’s back to himself and Asirpa.  Keep in mind that he also was willing to sell Asirpa out to Tsurumi for 200 yen was pretty low.  He has always been the brute force for the group he’s been in and all of his plans and assumptions are frequently incorrect or just really bad ideas.  Pretty much the best thing that Sugimoto has done during the entire manga is to make sure to rescue Shiraishi from the 27th as he has been pretty smart at figuring things out and sticking with Asirpa. 

Even as a huge Ogata fan, I’d state that him saving Ogata to only try to kill Ogata at the hospital was a terrible idea as Ogata has his own agenda, complicating the quest for the gold.  If Sugimoto thought tactically, he should have let Ogata die on the ice floe.  Sugimoto thinks Ogata is a wildcat just stirring shit up, but really the person who stirs up the most shit is Sugimoto himself.

Noda gives us several pages of nonstop action as the two of them fight intensely.  Even though Sugimoto stabs Hijikata in the arm with his bayonet the man is undeterred and he has to block his sword with the bayonet.

Hijikata is just trying to do what didn’t happen at Abashiri, removing Sugimoto from the battle for the gold and gaining Asirpa.

Interestingly, Ushiyama is the one who restrains Sugimoto in an attempt to bring calm and logic to the situation.  Very interesting to see Ushiyama using his head in this situation!  This is definitely a low blow towards Sugimoto, Ushiyama is thinking more than he is.

Shiraishi and Asirpa join in trying to bring level-headed discussion as Asirpa is the one who calls for talking things over. She obviously doesn’t want to see conflict between any of these men and Shiraishi always favors retreat over conflict.

Hijikata appears calm and collected while Sugimoto seems to lose it as he just makes a random sound as his pupils almost roll up into his head and his scarf flutters in his ‘anger’ wind indoors.  I say this is one of those moments where Sugimoto really just goes into beserker mode and decides his best option is to take Ushiyama.  Now, seriously Ushiyama has judo skills that are even better than Sugimoto’s and it isn’t that he’s protecting Asirpa at this point.  Instead, he’s ignoring everything that is being said to him and he goes on to judo roll Ushiyama into the floorboards.

But this is Ushiyama we are talking about, so he pops up with little effort and returns the favor to Sugimoto and the chapter ends.

I really don’t have any major comments on these two chapters.  They have confirmed that Ueji is one of the most vile of the convicts, a child killer and also he wants to disappoint other convicts by hurting them through believable lies.  I look forward to his death at the hands of someone in the cast.

Hijikata definitely has stepped up his game and it is clear that he sees Sugimoto as the biggest fly in the ointment.  He set him up at Abashiri, we don’t know what else he was told by Ogata and honestly, he likely doesn’t care what is the truth or not.  I personally think Hijikata likely appreciated Ogata’s attempt to snipe Sugimoto, since it would take him out of the game.  Ogata killing Sugimoto would have been a bonus for both Hijikata and Tsurumi.  If Sugimoto looks for sympathy from Hijikata’s group due to Ogata’s actions he likely won’t get it.  Plus, Hijikata has always kept Ogata away from things as I’m waiting for him to reveal that he knew Ogata and Kiro were working together.

This really shows how under-equipped team Sugimoto is.  Tsurumi has the resources of the 27th as well as the blind eye towards him from central.  Hijikata has his own group with a wide range of resources and some buy in from the locals (not great though).  Sugimoto has his stubbornness and if it weren’t for Shiraishi and Asirpa he’d be in rough shape in the quest for the gold.  The fact that Shiraishi and Asirpa are telling him to talk means they see what situation they are in and the disadvantage that they have in the entire affair.

This reunion is clearly going to force Sugimoto and Asirpa into working with Hijikata again instead of his crazy idea of swooping in to steal the skins.  I look forward to the next chapter to see what happens next.

[tessatechaitea]

Cerebus #16 (1980)

Cerebus is going up the stairs while Lord Julius is going down them. In the same direction.

Cerebus is often touted as the greatest independent comic book of all time (for various reasons) but I'd like to point out that Elfquest told an incredible story with beautiful art in just 20 issues as opposed to 300. Plus it had an elf orgy. Also, I know it continued on after the first 20 issue story arc but we can ignore the rest of the story because there was never another elf orgy and also the rest of the series concentrated too much on Skywise's fear of dying which was totally valid but was often used as a foil to make Cutter seem braver and more loyal to his wolf roots but really just showed he was stubborn and dumb and totally didn't fuck as many elf maidens as Skywise did. Cerebus does have some sex in his comic book but since the first sex he has is when he rapes Astoria, I don't think anybody was really clamoring for any more of that. I mean, sure, some people were! I didn't mean to erase the sickos and perverts out there. Sorry, jerks! I'm sure the "A Note from the Publisher" bit by Deni seemed like a good idea when starting out on a harrowing self-publishing journey like that of Cerebus. But it quickly became a space where Deni just says, "Self-publishing is fraught with hardships and also this is a really good issue! I won't spoil it! Goodbye!" I won't be sad to see the divorce happen! That's an okay thing to say because it already happened, right? It's not like my wishing for the end of their marriage in 2020 somehow brought about the end of their marriage in the early 80s. Is it? I never took a college course on cause and effect so who the fuck knows? Unless that Critical Literary Theory class was about that?! Oh my God! I think I understand it now! Dave's finale to the "Swords of Cerebus" essay that has been broken up over the last three issues describes how he was consciously drawing the Eye of the Pyramid cult leader's gigantic penis while drawing the snake. Sorry to report, though, that he's being sarcastic. Apparently Dave is above using phallic imagery to make a point about patriarchal themes. Only fucking hacks do shit like that! Take that, whoever wrote fucking Beowulf!

Even if Sim can't see the humor in everybody assuming he made a giant snake dick joke on purpose, he can still be extraordinarily funny with the least of materials.

This issue takes Cerebus to his first fancy dress party (that's a costume party for all of you people who aren't British (which is also me but only because I was born a citizen of the United States of America who didn't have a choice but knew it was a huge mistake as I was learning about Monty Python's Flying Circus and Dave Allen at Large in elementary school and The Young Ones in junior high and Red Dwarf in college)). Cerebus changes out of his vest and puts on his costume: a furry black jumper (that's sweater for all of you people who aren't British (which is also me but only because I was forced to watch mostly American popular entertainment until the advent of YouTube and now I mostly just watch Taskmaster over and over (by the way, is Taskmaster as good for people who don't know all of the "contestants" or do I enjoy it more because I recognize and like almost all of the people on the show?)). Lord Julius is dressed as an, um, a, uh, Estarcion matador? I have no context in which to guess what he is.

Certain people like Cerebus because he says what's on his mind. I purposefully used the passive voice here so you can't prove one of those people is me.

Lord Julius has a follow-up joke that leaves the reader thinking, "I guess all Pavrovians are fat?" That's Dave Sim continuing his work on Estarcion continuity! Remember how Pavrovians are the, um, you knows of Estarcion! You know the nationality I'm thinking of! The ones that are all the things people usually find insulting! Come on, you know who I'm talking about. The dumb fat arrogant stupid naive gullible ones! Yes, that's it! Americans! Try to remember Dave is Canadian. You have to think of Americans through Canadian eyes (which are the equivalent of smart, cynical Americans)! E'lass and Turg have gotten tickets to The Festival of Petunias so they can steal the Wyndmel Diamond. They're the duo composed of a giant muscular man and a little bitty shrimpy guy who last encountered (and were beaten by) Cerebus in Issue #6. E'lass is dressed like some kind of small dirt dwelling creature so I hope Cerebus gets offended by his costume and stabs him in the throat. There isn't enough random slaughter in this book about barbarians.

I haven't wanted to fuck a fish this badly since The Littler Mermaid.

I suppose I could have said "since Splash" in that last caption to seem more normal and less perverted but then you'd know I was lying. The assassins make a move on Lord Julius but Cerebus comes up with a plan to stop them that involves inducing the Palnu elite to throw herring-and-onion dip at them. Is that a parodied scene from Duck Soup or Conan the Barbarian? In the confusion, the lead assassin slips out through a secret door and E'lass, having just stolen the diamond and becoming increasingly paranoid that somebody saw him, slips through it as well. Cerebus and Lord Julius follow, having noticed the assassin but not E'lass. Most of the pursuit's tension comes from E'lass believing Cerebus remembers him and is now going to use the excuse of this new crime to murder him. It's more tense than I've even described because I really need Cerebus to murder somebody in this Swords & Sorcery book already. Reading this book waiting for a murder is like firing up a porn video on your laptop with your dick in your hands and realizing after five minutes that the video is almost over and was just a teaser for a pay porn site. Cerebus threatens to quit his job just before battling the assassin so he can negotiate a term of 8 bags of gold and a horse in exchange for killing the assassin as a pension before he goes. Julius agrees and Cerebus takes out the assassin with a rock to the head. I mean, I guess it's a murder so yay? But I was really hoping for some stabbing. Meanwhile E'lass lives through the cliché of the criminal whose paranoia gets the better of him and he tosses the diamond into a huge pit so he doesn't get caught only to discover that they never knew he took it anyway. Everything is wrapped up quickly and thoroughly with Cerebus given money and motivation to move on from Palnu. Dave complained about his heavy use of cliché in this Palnu trilogy and I have to say I agree with Dave. But I only agree with Dave on this point! Don't take that out of context and start raving on Twitter that Grunion Guy agrees with Dave's Issue #186 rant about girlfriends being illogical which is also secretly a rant about a guy who needs to get laid so badly he puts up with partners he probably wouldn't even be friends with and then finally just decides orgasms are evil and religion is super awesome but only if you smash all three People of The Book religions into one bland mash paste of ancient dogma. In the epilogue, Lord Julius receives a letter from his niece Jaka in which she expresses delight in possibly seeing Cerebus again. I guess Dave learned from Howard the Duck that comic book nerds really love for their anthropomorphic heroes to be fucking statuesque women. Perhaps every guy develops a fetish of being with a woman whose breasts are at head level due to being hugged constantly by their female relatives when they're ten years old. Deni's brother Michael's first installment of the "Aardvarkian Age" essays appears in this issue. It gives more details to the various nations of Estarcion and their inhabitants' culture, ruling styles, and brutality of their armies. I thought I'd be more interested in this than I actually wound up being. Maybe I thought it would be funnier? Instead, it's just a bunch of facts about made-up kingdoms to make them sound more believable by making them more like European countries in the Middle Ages. If this entire bit were just lifted from a history of Europe with the names of actual countries replaced by Estarcion countries, I wouldn't even notice. Mostly because I know nothing about European history. As I've always said, "Those who know about European history are doomed to repeat it, boring every single other person at the cocktail party." Dave apologizes for the quarter price increase of the comic book in the Aardvark Comments pages. Why, I hadn't even noticed! Probably because this is the Biweekly reprint issue and I purchased it as a collection off of eBay. Some people write in and discuss how Cerebus is a very fine and funny comic book. I nodded along in agreement as I read the letters. I only touched my private area twice while reading and neither time was for pleasure. The most surprising thing about "The Single Page" is that it clearly states who the comic was authored by: Kent Featherly. I don't know why so many of these single page comics aren't more clearly labeled. Isn't part of the reason for having them exposure for the artists drawing and writing them?! Not putting an effort to let a large audience know who you are and how they can read more of your work just sounds like something I would do. By the way, you should play this game I wrote, Starship Troopers: The Game. You can find it on the hard drive of my laptop. Cerebus #16 Rating: B. Look, it was funny and well drawn and all that. But even Dave said it relied too heavily on cliché plot devices. I've got to lower the grade when even the author points out some of the story's flaws! And I'd probably have come to the same conclusion without having been influenced by Dave Sim because I'm like the best Internet comic book critic who isn't a critic and isn't actually reviewing comic books. Also I almost forgot this evidence: I'm a Grandmaster Comic Book Reviewer! Nobody else can make that claim and if they do, they're plagiarizing me and I'd like you to point them out to me so I can send them a threatening email in which I pretend to be my own lawyer who is really good at suing dumb-dumbs.