#as we have covered many a time … thats ok i still love them lowkey ……

[xxplastic-cubexx]

as someone who knows what ur prev old man yaoi obsession was it checks out you like cherik.... same dynamic id say

For but a moment i thought you were referring to arasawa but nay you meant xehaqus 😔

[kweebtrash]

Pay Attention, Dumbass

Pairing: Demon!Jaehyun x OC

Genre: Smut/ Comedy?? Maybe?

Features: demonic fingering

Summary: two idiot roommates accidentally summon two ancient demons. Forced into a contract, they only had two choices; die or make a deal with the devil. The most logical answer was to make them their boyfriends of course (this is lowkey a bad slice of life hentai, i swear). The demons know nothing about the human world and have to deal with “lessons” from their human girlfriends.

A/N: This used to be on my Kofi which im closing down and just putting everything up on here. This isnt continuing.

Masterlist  Johnny Version Here

-----

"You haven't moved in hours. Don't you do anything else?"

I dug into the chip bag that laid on my desk and grabbed a handful to shove into my mouth. "Of course i do," I said through the mush of chips. "I went to the bathroom."

Jae sighed. "Not what i meant. Do you ever leave your room?"

I shrugged and downed some of my soda. "Yeah. I go to work sometimes."

"Where do you even work at?"

"A bar." I went back to clicking through attacks and swerving around opponents. "Guys, come on, come on, come on!" I said into the headphone and mic set i had on. "Someone head towards the point! At least start trying to take it over!"

"A bar?" He asked, confused. "What is that?"

"Its uh..." I drifted off as i propelled myself forward and released my ultimate attack, sending my mecha exploding in different directions. I quickly reloaded myself into the machine and continued my rampage of gunshots. "Like uh... drinks. Liquor."

"Libations?"

I snorted at the stupid word. "Yeah, whatever. That."

"And that's the only time you leave?" He continued asking.

"What the fuck is this? Twenty questions?" I grabbed another handful of chips. "On the left! Move out the way!" I grumbled at my friends who were playing online with me.

"I'm just curious since you don't have the capability to rid yourself of the sin of sloth."

I glared over at him as he was reclined back on my bed, arms behind his head, and torso on full display as he refused to wear a shirt (not that i was complaining). "I do things! I just like playing video games more! Sometimes i go to school too!"

"And what proof do you have of this because i never see it."

"My never ending debt and crippling anxiety." One of my online friends asked who i was talking too and i sucked my teeth. "My boyfriend is being annoying." Queue the kissy noises and jokes of the very mature men i gamed with.

"Oh? Im annoying?" Jae grumbled. "Whats really annoying is seeing you rot away while im forced to stay by your side. Hours and hours of boredom and still im trapped in the confines of this ridiculous home with nothing to do."

I set my headset down as the round finished and turned my desk chair towards him. "Are you upset that im not paying attention to you?"

He sat up quickly and scoffed. "Please. What do i need the attention of a human for?"

"You certainly want it when you're horny." I giggled. "Heh...horny...you have horns also so it's...anyway. Are you being a baby because you want attention?"

"I am not an infant. You are infuriating. Of course i had to get stuck with you."

"Oohhh, thats how it is. Yep, definitely being a baby, now with a temper tantrum."

Jae's eyes glowered and his claws dug into my mattress. "There are so many things i want to do to you right now."

"Ooh daddy." I snorted and put my headset back on. "Sounds kinky."

"Which is it? Am i an infant or a father?! I dont understand!"

I sighed and stood up. "Do you want to try playing with me?" I gestured at the now vacant spot of my gaming chair.

Jae stared at me then the seat. "Play that ridiculous thing?"

"Yeah," i shrugged and looked down at my feet. "It's something i like to do and you're my boyfriend sooo...i guess...i mean..." I twiddled with my thumbs as my cheeks began to warm up. "It'd be cool if you tried to like some of the stuff i do."

"Is that what boyfriends do?"

"Y-yeah...sorta. Look do you want to or not?" I huffed in frustration.

He stood up and made his way over, glaring down at me with his humanized yet still terrifying eyes. "Fine. I will try it."

I couldn't help the dorky smile that beamed across my face. "Ok, cool. Sit down."

He placed himself in the seat and i sat on his lap then scooted the chair closer to the desk. I positioned his fingers on the designated keys for offense and defense as well as the computer mouse. "Here, why don't i just guide your fingers the first few rounds so you get the hang of it?"

"Whatever."

The smile started to fade as i covered his hands with mine that seemed to dwarf in comparison. "Put your stupid claws away. You cant game right with your pretty manicure."

He growled like an irritated dog and slid the claws back into his skin. With his back pressed to mine, he ended up resting his chin on my shoulder, watching as i joined a new round. His somewhat chubby cheek felt warm against mine and i willed myself not to kiss it. It wasn't like he was going to respond anyway. He was cold hearted in every sense of the word, even when he fucked it almost seemed like a chore. It still was amazing and i loved every second of it but the distant feelings was strong. Of course it wasn't a great idea to make a demon your damn boyfriend but there was rarely a time where i made a smart decision.

Deciding to suck it up and just concentrate i pressed Jae's fingers down as i helped launch attacks and maneuver us around the screen. "This is nothing but hectic destruction " he commented.

"Yep, pretty much."

"And you enjoy this?"

"Absolutely."

"I am pleased by this." I felt a slight nip at my neck as he purred into my ear. "Very pleased."

"Pleased that i like shooting people and destroying things?"

"Exactly. Its quite...sexy."

"Oh my god. You're a dork!" I snorted. "Its just a damn game, weirdo." I pressed his fingers down harder, not wanting to slow down and ruin my winning streak. "Keep up."

"Well when you're crushing my fingers its hard to do so."

"Just follow me. You dont even have to move them."

"I would like to move them but-"

"Shh, give me a sec. Bastards are on my fucking ass! God i hate when they just gang up on you for no FUCKING REASON!" I screamed at the monitor. "Such dicks. Fuckin' dicks."

"Your mouth is filthy."

"Yeah you said that when it was full of cum too."

"Hm...that was also enjoyable." Another nip to my neck, this time followed by small sucks and kisses. "Continue using your filthy mouth and destroying things. This at least is semi entertaining now."

"Glad you think so. Quit kissing my neck, its distracting."

"Distracting?! You enjoy that! You said it this morning. Specifically 'Jae'," He faked a slightly high pitched moan. "'Keep kissing my neck, oh god'."

I flushed with embarrassment and rammed my elbow into his chest. "I already have to deal with dicks online i dont need go deal with you too."

"I suppose you wouldn't want to deal with this then?"

I felt him press his hips against my ass. The grey sweatpants he had on left nothing to the imagination and i swallowed hard as my concentration wavered. "S-stop." I whimpered.

"I dont think i will." One hand left the mouse and pressed against my stomach to keep me in place. "Support that. I will control these buttons."

I pressed my lips together and simply nodded. How he had the grace to continue slight grinds against me i didn't know but i was responding to them eagerly. I arched my back and wiggled my ass every time he rolled forward, creating a sinful friction between us. My eyes drifted from the screen momentarily to see that his fingers were working perfectly over the keys as if he had played for years. "You're...actually winning."

"What? As if its hard?" He tsked. "Humans have simple minds and-WHY IS THIS MAN PUNCHING ME FROM THE SKY?"

I froze our sensual movements to cackle loudly. "That's just Doomfist. He's so OP and stupid."

"OP?"

"Overpowered, meaning there's no reason for him to even be here."

"Im going to destroy him completely until he can never return."

"They all respawn, Jae. That's how the game continues."

"Not if I can help it. I want that mongrel dead. Get that clicky thing ready. I'm aiming to destroy."

"You think I'm sexy when I want to kill things but I think you're cute, you know that?" I turned towards him to press a kiss to his cheek yet my lips connected with his when he moved.

"I am not cute....but you are...or whatever." I wondered if that tint on his cheeks was real or just my imagination.

I smiled to myself anyway, pleased with his compliment and his valiant effort to enjoy the same things I did. He was truly acting like a boyfriend-one that felt genuine even if he crawled up from hell. Just before, he was complaining about how never moved but we stayed like this for a couple more hours, even sharing snacks and competing with my online friends. There came a point in the night, though, when searching for a server with an open game slowed tremendously. Minutes ticked by and still nothing. Jae's drumming of his fingers against the wooden desk in impatience was starting to drive me crazy. "Doing that isn't going to make it go faster, you know."

"This is about as interesting as watching you play on that small screen."

"We've gone over this. Its a phone, a cell phone, a portable phone."

"Yes, yes. That stupid thing with all the colors. Its like this stupid thing." He pointed at the computer screen. "Only smaller."

"You seem to enjoy the big stupid thing judging by how many kill streaks you got."

His lips tweaked into a smirk. "That's because im an expert killer. None of them deserved to live."

"You did get my rank up and some loot boxes so i guess i should thank you."

"Yes, bask in my glory and show me how grateful you are." His hand that had remained around my waist for most of our play time started creeping its way to my thighs.

"Are you wanting me to show you how grateful i am or are you trying to show me how desperate you are?" I snickered.

"I am not desperate. Since the stupid game is not cooperating im just trying to inject some extra curricular activities."

"Such as?"

He set his head on my shoulder again and i felt his fangs dig in deeper into my neck, making me let out a drawn out whine. "J-jae!"

He chuckled from deep within his throat as i felt his tongue trail from the column of my neck up to my earlobe. "Such as...watching you squirm when i add the slightest of pressure," Two of his fingers slid between the junction of my thighs and pressed firmly against the center of my shorts. "Here."

The tips of his fingers began gliding against the fabric, the soft cotton adding the smallest amount of friction against my clit. My teeth sunk into my bottom lip as my leg began to bounce. I wanted to wait for a new game, my win streak was too precious to me but Jae was something else. Trying not to make it too obvious i adjusted myself on his lap, spreading my legs a little wider. His fingers garnered more room but he didnt move them under the fabric. Instead he kept torturing me with slow movements, occasionally pushing into the most sensitive areas. "Who's enjoying the attention now?" He teased.

Suddenly a little ping from my computer signaled that a game had finally been found. My attention quickly shifted and i put my headset back on and got into position. Jae reeled back in confusion. "Are you really going to continue to play?"

"Well...yeah. I mean it took forever to get into this game. I dont wanna lose it."

"Hey, can you be healer?" I heard my friend say into my ear piece.

"Fuck you! Im not going to be healer! You be healer, you twat waffle!"

Jae let out a heavy and annoyed sigh. I almost felt bad until i was lagging behind everyone else. I had to-

I felt his finger finally move beneath my shorts and press into my hole gently. I had to admit that he had already gotten me worked up enough to provide him with some lubrication and he slid in easily. "C-cut it out." I stammered.

"Oh no, dont mind me. Your game is more important. Keep going."

"I just mean-ah-ahh!" I tried to snap my mouth shut before my moan slipped out for fear of my friends hearing but it was too late. Jae had moved the seat of my shorts aside and pumped his finger faster, occasionally curling it an inch or two from my entrance. I covered the mic part of the headset and glared back at him. "If you dont s-stop-"

I snapped my thighs shut as he added another finger, the 'come here' motions growing stronger. Immediately, he landed a harsh tap to my outer thigh, a small growl floating in the tense air around us. "I said keep going."

"Well i would if you just-HEY! MOTHERFUCKER! I LIKED THESE SHORTS!" I looked down at the center of my shorts that had now been torn open because of his reappearing claws. "What's wrong with you?!"

Without a word he grabbed onto my ankles and set my legs up on the desk, keeping them spread. The clawed hand snaked its way to my throat and with the slightest pressure i could feel them digging in. It wasn't enough to hurt but certainly enough to make my entire body shudder with electricity. "I-i cant reach the keyboard." I whispered.

He scooted the chair closer to the desk, making my legs almost rest on it fully. "Wheres that tappy thing you have?"

"Tappy thing?"

"Where you move the sticks."

"You mean a controller?"

"You can plug it in right?" He questioned as his thrusting resumed which made my mind mush in a second.

"U-uh yeah-um its uh...d-draw-drawer!"

He let my throat go and allowed me to reach into my desk drawer and grab my gaming controller. I plugged it into my computer's usb port as my friends argued about me not pulling my weight and being static. I lied about my game lagging and shifted the mic up so i sounded muffled and they wouldn't be able to hear how much if a slut Jae made me. "There. Now you can play. Keep up that win streak. Have to get the gold and boxes, right? Have to play with your friends and ignore me, right?" He nipped at my ear as his fingers slipped out of me to rub circles against my clit. "Have to beg me to let you cum, right?

"P-please dont make me do that!"

"See? You're begging already. What a good girl you are."

My entire body tensed at those two words and i let my controller go for a moment to grab his hand and press his fingers back into me. "Keep going. I want you to keep going."

"I could but i dont have to. Maybe i can use the tappy thingy instead. More people I can kill." He jerked his fingers away and pushed them against my lips. "Clean these off for me. Dont want to get it dirty, do i?"

"Jaaaeeeee," i whined and leaned in for a kiss but he turned his head away.

"Clean. Them."

Reluctantly, i swallowed his fingers down, lapping between and tasting myself. He tested my gag reflex by moving them to the back of my throat but pulling away when it became to much. It was nothing but entertainment for him, a game of cat and mouse that made me feel doomed. "You know you love being inside me." I panted as my mouth was now freed. "I can ride-"

"Oh, how unfortunate. You died. Now we have to wait to return. You're too distracted, Ivy. A shame, truly."

I didn't care anymore. In the few seconds i had between my respawning i stood up and turned towards him, pulling his sweatpants down to stay around his knees. He had no qualms about his erection. I had felt it, of course, but it was like he paid it no mind, like it wasn't an inconvenience and he enjoyed teasing me instead. Was it another way to give me a taste of my own medicine? What a bastard! "Come here." I tried to sound as sultry as possible but he just laughed and took the controller from me.

"Lets see if i can figure this out now." Jae looked at the buttons and pressed at a few before moving the joy sticks to test them out. "Strange but i believe I can-"

It was my turn to cut him off. I lifted his head and focused on his eyes, angered by the smirk still on his lips. "Fuck me."

"Nope."

That wasn't the answer i wanted.

He craned his head to the side to look at the monitor. "Can you move? Im trying to play here."

"Shut up! You didn't even care about playing before!" I pouted as my cheeks flushed both in annoyance and embarrassment. I sat back on his lap anyway, chest to chest, and guided him inside me. Not a sound from him or even a look. He was focused on fighting now which made me want to punch him but i figured if i fucked myself on him long enough i could break his resolve. I gripped onto the back of the chair and started working up and down his length, adding kisses to his neck in between whimpers. "Jae...come on..."

"Ooh, double kill."

"I swear to god! If you dont-"

"No god, just demons."

"Yeah, you're acting like a demon. A demon asshole who wont even pay attention to his girlfriend! I cant believe you're doing this!"

He finally looked at me, dead in the eyes and it made me nervous. "It doesn't feel good, does it?"

Ok, ok. So i had learned my lesson. It was a two way street and maayybeee i wasn't being the best partner but i never figured he wanted anything from me. He never expressed a lot if affection or wonderment at what i did throughout my day. How was i supposed to know? I guess with his lack of knowledge about human things he truly had nothing to do unless i was guiding him. Fuck, now i really felt bad. What a buzzkill. "Im sorry...i understand how you feel now. I didn't think you cared. I know were just together because of the contract. I thought you still hated humans and didn't want to exist beside them."

"I do hate humans but you're my human now. Unfortunately, i have to rely on you and its maddening to be stuck here. In hell i did hundreds of things. I had a job. I had meetings with other demons. I planned wars, participated in real battles, created weapons. I was someone. Here, im nothing but a prisoner."

"Nonono! Please dont feel like that...i dont want to make you feel like that. Please..." I felt my eyes watering and i quickly buried my face in the crook of his neck. He sighed and tossed the controller on the table and shut my laptop. He kicked off the rest of his pants and with ease picked me up and led me to the bed.

"Dont ever speak of this. Not to Johnny, not to Xan. No one, understand?"

I nodded quickly as my back hit the mattress and he stayed above me. "You will do what i say just as much as im forced to do as you say. Love me unconditionally. Break me free from this world and show me why i shouldn't kill everyone in it."

I swallowed hard and nodded again. "I promise. I promise you everything."

"Good. Secondly...i would like to do battle against you in those games."

I couldn't help the giggle i let out. I didn't expect him to say something like that after being so serious. "Oh? You think you can beat me?"

"Im a strategist and a warrior. Of course i can."

"Oh, ok. You play a few rounds of Overwatch and suddenly you're the master. Just dont say anything when i kick your ass, bitch."

He chuckled deeply and snapped his hips without warning. He had still remained inside me and the sudden movement made me cry out loud. "Bring it on then. We'll see who's the better warrior here. Now," his eyes shifted into pure darkness and his fangs glistened with temptation. "Lets see how fast you can give in."

[secretsandwriting]

This is what won as well as responses to almost if not all the comments left.

After this I'll make the new one to go over some of the options you guys brought up to refine it.

Ok, so first here are the things that are done and will be in the next one.

Y/n will be a vigilante. (83.3% voted yes)

Enemies forced to work together (76.7% voted yes)

Enemies to lovers (76.7% voted yes)

Dating to stay undercover (53.3% voted yes, 23.3% voted its fake dating, thats always an option)

Fashion (76.7% voted Fashion)

People might die. (36.7% voted just not the batfam and co, 26.7% voted no please let everyone live, and 26.7% voted maybe as long as I don't like them)

Angst response is easier to show then to type out.

So now were on to the three questions where you could type your answers.

Things you don't want.

+ means there different requests I put together

Stalker ex boyfriends + SA and yanderes + Crazy ex + Allusion to s*xual *ssault + dark themes, r@pe, abuse, cheating + S**ic*de. It's a really bad trigger for me. If it ends up in play, trigger warning in advance.

First off, I don't really want to do any of these and I know I've done some of them before so I get why you're bringing it up. I'm actually trying to avoid them more now because its not the best for me to be writing them and all that.

As for the dark themes, its based off DC so I can't promise that not coming up as for trigger warnings, I'm not the best at them but I do try to put them before any part that has things in them so that's a given. But for the most part the only ones of these I see happening is the dark themes and those would mostly be the normal Gotham things.

Pet’s Dying, My pets dying lol

I mean, I figured out a way to help stop that so you don't have to worry about it.

Really gritty violence?

The nice thing about smau is that people don't normally post that type of thing on social media, escpecially if your trying to keep your identity secret. Also I don't like how I write things like that so I try to avoid it. There might be mentions of it happening but I doubt I'll ever go into too much detail on it.

SLOW BURN LIKE NO SIS I CAN'T HANDLE THAT

Well, since undercover dating won there won't be too much to slowburn.

If it is enemies to lovers, please don't make them too antagonistic

No this would be my favorite version of enemies to lovers. They may be enemies but they know that the other isn't actually that bad but they have pride so its really just petty in general.

IF YOU KILL THE MAIN CHARACTER AGAIN IM COMING FOR YOUR KNEECAPS

Jokes on you I took my own knee caps

jason being a whore

I love this but you don't want it which almost makes me sad but ok anon. I'll try not to make Jason a whore.

No kids: just everyone being young and living it up without being too idk domestic?

Ok, idk how to avoid making it too domestic but I'll try.

Anything you do want?

Having to live together. Cohabitation

Easy. I got you anon.

Titus and co as well as Jason bestie + bat cow 💕 + reader may be enemies with dick but reader and damien have a brother-sister bond

These three kinda go hand in hand and I like all of them.

Soulmate au? Secret dating?

Probably not soulmate au and secret dating would have to be a side relationship because Dick and Y/n would be fake dating. So I could do it, but I need another couple to do it with.

Stupidly cute fluff + happiness maybe + Some sweet domestic fluff is always nice :)

Already wanted all of these in it, so you three are thinking on the same wavelength as i am.

SASSY PET RACCOON LIVING HIS BEST LIFE , FAKE DATING where maybe ONE of the batfam still don't believe that they are dating and try everything to prove that they aren't which leads to Dick and reader to try absolutely anything to convince everyone

I love it. Thank you. However the pet raccoon isn't confirmed yet as there were a bunch of other options people put in so I'm going to have that one run again.

john mulaney quotes

THE FACT I NEVER THOUGHT OF THIS I TRULY SAD. THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME!! THIS WILL DEFINITELY HAPPEN

Flustered Dick, even if lowkey + Dick's ass

I'm combining these simply because together, they give me some great ideas.

y/n having literally EVERYONE wrapped around her finger (maybe one exception idk)

Ok, but really. This is a great idea. Everyone just loving her but one of them sitting in the corner like. "Idk man, something about her isn't right..." Proceeds to sip drink.

CAR CHASE CAR CHASE And maybe slowdancing in the rain

So these were sent in by the same person. I like both! I like both a lot. I just figured out how to do a car chase in smau so its all good!!!!

Soft, moonlit whispers as one of them bleeds deeply + Dicks reaction to love interest being hurt, badly. I always love that. + fluff, and angst (maybe reader getting injured really badly)

I might get in trouble for this, but I do like the ideas... A lot...

More action

I'll try! I've found it a little hard with smau and I'm not the best action writer but I do want to add more action so I'll try to figure out how to do more.

Anything else or is it all covered?

pls for gods sake, for my sake, for your sake, don't kill the pets

Ever since I got this, it was one of the first so its been a little while. I keep wondering if its a threat? But again, pets dying isn't planned. I should have enough to go for plot so that there is no need to kill pets.

A lil bit of CRACK just batfam crack in general oh and maybe BATCOW making an appearance

The only problem with batcow, is pinterest doesn't have many pictures of cows that look like they could be pets because there are rarely people with them so thats why batcow hasn't shown up. Since I have more time to plan this one, I'll look for more options and see if I can find any.

what if, and hear me out, we made it gay🌈? or, at least, masc fem reader?

No, simply because I'm not comfortable writing it as the main relationship/character. I've tried before and I didn't like it in the least and scrapped a week work. So If I tried I doubt I would finish it, if I did, it wouldn't be good because I would probably just give up part way through. So I can definitely do ships and all that that aren't the main but for some reason every time I've tried to do it as a main relationship, I hate it. Sorry!

it would be cool to have more poc or lgbtq rep

I'm actually planning for more poc to happen in the current one. I noticed lack of poc not long ago and confused myself as to why so there will definitely be more representation.

As for lgbtq, I'll try. I was planning on trying to have at least one ship or something because I haven't. But as long as its not the main relationship I can do it so that I'll at least post it.

kiss ily muah

I love you too! muah! I really needed this, thank you!

NO KIDS PLEASE AND THANK U

Ok, No kids and you're welcome.

If there is an instance of fashion, could they help each other get ready, and laugh and joke a lot?

You genius you! Of course I love it!

Nope everything’s perfect! love from yours truly fuzzycloudsz <33 + All covered + All good! + We good + That's all. I love your stuff. + its covered !!!@ cant wait!!! + All good

I'm glad I got everything then! Thank you guys! I'm glad you like my stuff and that your excited for the new one!

[insomnihan]

han’s Entire Thoughts and Feelings on Dreamcatcher’s “Scream”

ITS FUCKING HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIKE THIS IS ON GOD HAPPENING I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO RELAX I CANNOT LET THIS WAIT ANY LONGER LETS GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

there are no read mores here so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALRIGHT SO-

THE SONG THIS F UCKING SONG WHERE👏DO👏I👏START 👏 I KNEW RIGHT WHEN I WENT ON TO LISTEN TO THE GODDAMN LYRIC SPOILER bc im an impatient little bich THIS WAS GONNA KICK MY SHINS KNEE ME IN THE NOSE AND OWN. ME. i forgot which moot i said this to but i said they should try putting their rock/metal sound with an edm kind of sound anD HERE WE ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT SOUNDS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!! this got my heart racing quick as hell even during the slower parts????????? im sorry to the beginning parts, jiu, and the bridge i cant RELAX™

CRITICISM???????? I DUNNO THAT BI TCH™

(i wont tag every part they have ill just describe some of them lmao)

JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU JIU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MISS KIM MINJI YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this, this, THIS AND THIS G O D her voice is just so perfect to start the song to ease you into this BOP™ and then her voice for those pre-chorus parts to ready you ONCE AGAIN for that chorus BUT YET its still hype as hell bc you K N O W what shes leading you into her voice is LIKE FEATHERS AND CLOUDS dont ask

yoohyeon i swear to god- her voice........................... i cannot begin.............. to even describe how nice it is.................... I DUNNO HOW SERIOUSLY like it just has that tone and power where its not very high nor very low and its just.................. lord......... going right after jiu for this it was just so UUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH- pls i CANNOT with these parts and then still being a part of the choruses MA’AM WHY DOES YOUR VOICE JUST HITS THE SPOT HUH-

sua ALSO HAS A VOICE I JUST CANNOT DESCRIBE it just has this like..................... its unique and very alluring???????? i feel like i HAVE TO SAY THIS but her voice is as sexy as she is i- putting her right after jiu and yoohyeon at the beginning HOO and then this after gahyeon and damis fire and then shes also in the CHORUS TOO AND SHE ADDS MORE STRENGTH IN HER VOICE HELLO

SIYEON I HAVE TO SAY THIS AGAIN I WOULD LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE FOREVER IF I COULD her voice is just meant to do this kind of genre i swear to GOD like THIS????????? THIS x2??????????? BICTH THIS?????????????? she just sings so effortlessly and the emotion she puts like YOU CAN FEEL THAT S HIT especially in the bridge YEESH listening now it mellowed me out for like two (2) seconds before i went feral again

PIRI GAHYEON WALKED SO SCREAM GAHYEON COULD SPRINT pls i listened to this part and i was like ‘oH OKAY SING GO AHEAD’ oh no. nononononono NECK PLOT TWIST: SHES A RAPPER AGAIN BICTH THIS RIGHT HERE THATS HOW YOU GIVE WHIPLASH- AND THIS S HIT OOF THAT HIT- her voice is a lot deeper than we think LIKE her range is actually pretty big and we LOVE to hear it

dami..................................... what the f uck- FIRST OF ALL this was Too Much already on first listen and then your rap verse DO YALL HEAR HER PASSION??????? BC I HEAR IT DONT GET ME STARTED ON THIS PART WOO!!!!! LISTEN THAT HAD ME HOPPING AND JUMPING IN MY BED ON GOD- i swear pls stop saying this han come on she has one of the most (if not THE MOST) recognizable voices EVER???????? 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE DANCE FOR THIS SONG HAS GOT TO BE THE TOUGHEST CHOREO FOR THEM YET IVE SCREAMED ENOUGH ABOUT THE MASKED DANCER HOLDING HANDONGS SPOT UNTIL SHE GETS BACK AND HOW THEY HAVE GODDAMN BACKUP DANCERS LITERALLY THIS DANCE HAS SO MUCH POWER™ AND ITS SO HIGH ENERGY WHO THE FUC K IS DOING IT LIKE THEM

(i will be using the suit dance video for this portion)

JIU BEING LIFTED AT THE BEGINNING

THE CHORUS DANCES ARE YOU KIDDING ME- these parts.......................... oh s hit- and theN THE ENTIRE LAST ONE LIKE THAT ONE HITS AND MAKES YOU ITS BI-

literally both damis and gahyeons ‘devil. eyes. come.’ ESPECIALLY GAHYEONS when everyone is pointing at her (with this 🤘) thats Art™ right there

GAHYEONS RAP PART the usage of masks.................................. the symmetrical movement......................... Art™ part 2

these dances for sua and siyeons parts after the raps................... especially on the floor................ oh no- also i have to say siyeon lands on her knees really hard for that part i hope shes okay

jiu dancing by herself that is all

siyeon being Sexie™ that is all

dami stealing my heart and stomping on it that is all

ending pose with this 🤘 THE ICONIC™ AND LEGENDARY™ JUMPED OUT

THE VISUALS listen....................... LISTEN............................ LISTEN..................... L I S T E N- OKAY like my last two dreamcatcher thoughts and feelings (which if you wanna read: here and here) ill just show the scenes that i really liked (trust me it was REALLY hard to choose i might as well just put the mv again) and how i felt looking at them

............................................................................... oh f UCK-

ma’am whatever this is can you destroy me with it im ready-

OH S HIT

FOR THE WLW

but seriously whoever gave this woman a sword knows what the somnies like and wanna see and yes i too wanna get sliced the fuc k up

every time i see this i make like this songs title name and S C R E A M

i have no crazy special reason as to why i put her here other than i d worded when i saw her

GAHYEON NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this has to be one of the coolest things ive ever seen like on god this is so Pleasing to My Eyes like what the f kcu im like this A LOT

b ru H this part........................ theyre all doing this 🤘 at her.................... waht does it mean................... what doES IT MEAN

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH BICTH MXCUSE ME WHAT THE FKUC DOES THIS MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ooooooooooooooooooh mmmmmmmyyyyyyYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also some bonus gahyeon screenshots its what she deserves after spinning my head 360 degrees <3 (also i didnt notice that both did the sign love this for her)

T H E M

WELL WELL WELL STILL AS BEAUTIFUL AS EVER I SEE- HERE TO TELL ME THAT YOU ALL STILL HOLD THE TITLE OF BEING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN THE WORLD LITERALLY WHAT CAN I SAY????????????? I ALREADY BE YELLING HERE THAT THEYRE FRICKIN BEAUTIFUL AND STUNNING AS ALL HELL BUT IMMA KEEP SAYING IT AND YOURE NOT GONNA STOP ME

THE BLACK DANCE OUTFITS........................ THE WHITE DANCE OUTFITS........................... G OD

NO COMPLAINTS LETS MOVE ON:

JIU

her purple hair already hurted me and shes beautiful enough but in this video when she iS LITERALLY THE VERY FIRST MEMBER YOU SEE WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT WHEN YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL- pls i love lace................... her white outfit got chains on it................... and OH BICTH THE BLACK OUTFIT SHOWS HER BACK IM FERAL

SUA

MISS I SWEAR TO GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MUST ADDRESS THE OUTFIT WITH THE SWORD FIRST OKAY MA’AM LOOKING LIKE A WHOLE GODDESS WARRIOR READY TO SLICE BICTHES UP FOR TALKING S HIT LIKE ON SOME ‘YES IM FROM THEMYSCIRA’ VIBES AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON HER BLACK OUTFIT WITH HER BABS (BORA ABS) OUT

SIYEON

can you pls stop being beautiful for one (1) second can yoU PLS- i saw this shot in the mv and i think i fell in l*ve with her......................... as if i wasnt already shes as stunning as ever i cant stand her the black outfit with her long ass high pony tail witH THE GLOVES HELLO and that one look with the flowers or something on her head covering her eye.......... wow..........................

YOOHYEON

GIRL I GET IT YOURE SO PRETTY I UNDERSTAND!!!!!!!!!!!! this look in this specific photo with this dress and the braid uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh Ma’am youre a goddess I Am Looking 👁👄👁 her white outfit with the pony tail and those straps around her torso oh god and then her black outfit seems simple until you realize it shows a little of her sides pls stop im a weak man i-

DAMI

HELLO MISS LEE YUBIN I SEE YOU DECIDED TO GO ‘F UCK YALL LIVES’ AND BE HOT™ HUH- tbh not even mad at her yullet (yubin mullet) but shes dami she can work MANY LOOKS™ her black and white scene during her rap like thats a Look™ that attacked me and like yoohyeons black outfit hers looks like nothing special until you realize her sides are also out........... oh no-

GAHYEON

GAHYEON THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!!! this is HER ERA NO I WILL NOT LISTEN YOU CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND- i wasnt expecting her to attack me as much as she did its that GODDAMN pink outfit from the l ver. of the teasers i sHOULDVE KNOWN!!!!!!! her black outfit is like suas does she have gabs (gahyeon abs) OH NO LORD PLS- SHES BIG BEAUTIFUL™!!!!!!!!!!!!

BONUS TIME: B-SIDE TRACKS (short thoughts and parts i liked) had to go and use the color coded lyrics to make sure to not mistake the members and appreciate them fake ass fan i have a hard time telling who is who sometimes pls dont roast me ill do better next time

Intro

OKAY LISTEN- this intro be hitting a little different compared to their last intros maybe its just me but i feel as tho it COULD go just a little harder yknow???? tho ofc im love it still but ANYWAY-

Tension

now this........................ this is beautiful so this was apparently was supposed to be called goodnight????? and changed the lyrics?????? so............... they were hiding this Bop™................ for a few years????? did i read that right?????? LITERALLY A SLAP™ IT IS HEADBANG MATERIAL the fkcuing drums oh pls- THE CHORUS SOMEONE TALK TO ME ITS ADDICTING i............... LOVE jius voice on this song in particular that slower part i dunno why she just got me i- those parts sua and siyeon do before that ‘break the wall’ part i dunno their kinda lower voices theyre making me feel Things™

Red Sun

SOUNDCLOUD RAPPER DAMI RISE-

okay seriously WHAT THE FKCU- IT GRABBED MY NECK DURING THE HIGHLIGHT MEDLEY something about those bells or whatever throughout this song just hurted me so much ‘red sun’ just....................... gets in your brain and im okay with that!!!!!!!!!!! like its true that the beginning part is so intriguing and lowkey hypnotizing WOW and then their voices sound kinda breathy be hitting a little different MISS LEE GAHYEON ON THIS.................. MA’AM-

Black Or White

the guitar the fkycing guitaR CAN WE PLS TALK ABOUT THE GUITAR AND THE BASS FOR A SECOND???????? HELLO??????? THE CRUNCHINESS™ and then dami in the middle (not @ me for thinking she cursed in this song 🤡)  S HU T- AND HELLO JIU SIYEON AND DAMI ALL TOOK PART IN WRITING THESE LYRICS BICTH IM YELLING- THAT BLACK OR WHITE IN THE CHORUS SIYEON SINGS IS STUCK IN MY HEAD HELP ME jk im okay with it being there yoohyeon jiu and gahyeon during those pre-chorus parts......................... good christ............

Jazz Bar

pls stop flirting with me.................................. DAMI ESPECIALLY LISTEN- I HAD TO LOOK UP THE LYRICS WITH THE COLOR CODE TO MAKE SURE MY EARS WERENT MESSING WITH ME LEE YUBIN I WILL FALL IN L*VE WITH YOU S T O P THE F CKUING BRIDGE- dami sitting on a piano during that part................ Thinking™ jiu sua and yoohyeon oh pls they sound so good and pleasant to the ears................. it feels like im in a jazzy cafe during the evening and its raining outside im drinking a latte with a cream heart design inside and im wearing a scarf- ALSO JIU SIYEON YOOHYEON AND DAMI TOOK PART IN WRITING THIS TOO BICTH!!!!!!!!!! dami saying this was one of her favorites Y E A H

SAHARA

HERE WE HAVE THE SONG WE MEMED BEFORE WE GOT IT but like that ‘SA HA RA~ RA RA RA~’ part is SUPER CATCHY siyeon and gahyeon and sua holy damn i- siyeon during the second verse AND HER HIGH NOTE ma’am im love you- also SOUNDCLOUD RAPPER DAMI RISE 2.0 i dunno what it is with dami with her raps being like this but im not even mad????????? i feel like thats an unpopular opinion something about that instrumental that guitar is hitting a part of my heart that i wanna hear it and then those drums it sounds SO COOL

In the Frozen

HERES ANOTHER FKCUING BANGER THAT GRABBED MY NECK AND WOULDNT LET. GO. like i literally fell off my GODDAMN BED HEARING THIS S HIT GOT MY HEART PUMPING AND S HIT its that flower line whatever it is that siyeon yoohyeon and sua do GOOD LORD and then dami???????? miss?????????? THE ENDING PORTION OH LISTEN- WHATEVER IS GOING ON WITH THE INSTRUMENTAL HOLY SH IT AND DAMI SAYING ‘LIMIT NO MORE’ AND ALL IT REALLY DIDNT HAVE TO GO THAT HARD F U C K-

새벽 (Daybreak)

now this is a song that could heal souls- its not super slow like a ballad but it has like a lowkey jazz lo-fi (???) feel to it and their vocals are super gentle and smooth are these angels- i dunno what it is about all these songs and the second verses like this one is good too??????? especially yoohyeon U H i felt that in mY BONES i can definitely see this song as one i would go to when i wanna relax to or even fall asleep to bc its so soothing

Outro

THIS HITS REALLY DIFFERENT AND I LIKE IT I DUNNO WHAT IT IS IT JUST FEELS NICE IN MY EARS

LIKE i was expecting this album to be SUPER INCREDIBLE COME ON ITS DREAMCATCHER YKNOW but i didnt think itd be THIS incredible this group is just so full of surprises and are just the MOST HIDDEN GEMS its unfortunate they really arent very known trying to be a little critical ofc there are SOME things that could be different theres nothing absolutely and truly perfect ever- personally i am IN LOVE with this album theyve topped themselves from their last comeback which like HOLY S HIT however will this be the comeback that will get them their first win? ..................... to be honest its hard to tell i was so hopeful last comeback and yknow stuff happened OFC I DO HOPE AND WISH THEYLL WIN but whats most important (at least to me) is that i enjoy their music and enjoy all the content they give and appreciate their work and their voices

IN CONCLUSION: PLEASE YALL ALWAYS MAKE ME SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and like before i must bring this back:

[z7rkive]

DHAU: What To Know

Hey! its what all of u have been waiting for: more dhau stuff :)

Also!! most of this is by the one powerful braincell @snaxarba and I share hhh,, we’ve both worked hard (lmao not rlly we just screamed at each other sksks) on creating the universe around dhau uwu she’s been a great help aaa please send her love through her inbox! She’s currently writing a fic for this au, so if u got any questions or want a snippet go over to her :))))

Now that that’s out of the way, get ready for a LONG post:

GENERAL INFO

DH = Deathly Hallows

5 members

Fandom name: Hallows

Ages: S.S (26), T.R. (24), D.M. (21), H.P. (21), C.D. (19)

Hyung Line (oldest members) : Prince (Severus Snape) & L.V. (Tom Riddle)

Maknae Line (youngest members) : Draco Malfoy, Seven (Harry Potter), & Zed (Cedric Diggory)

Visual Line (“Faces/Most Handsome” of the group) : L.V., Draco, & Zed

Rap Line (Rappers in the group) : Prince & Zed

Dance Line (“Best” Dancers) : L.V., Seven, Prince, & Draco

Vocal Line (“Vocals of the group) : L.V., Seven, & Draco

Choreo Line (Take part in creating choreography) : Prince & L.V.

OTHER RANDOM INFO:

They work under G.G. Entertainment (G.G.E.) with Dumbledore as the Big Boss

Drarry is the most popular ship among fans

Dispatch is a company that takes photos of idols and tries to expose dating scandals

Dispatch Boss: so r they dating anyone

the hallow stan twt is crazy as fuck lmao

theres so many memes

solo stans are fans who only like 1 member of the group (the person is their favorite) and don’t pay attention to the others/give hate to the rest of DH

antis are just hateful ppl in general, they send lots of hate to either Hallows, one specific member, DH, or just the whole group in general

one time Severus and Harry did a vlive (they haven’t done one in a long time so sevenprince fans were excited! :0)!! Harry’s like, “Sev and I have a great plan for this live! :D” and then someone in the comments just says, “Can we have a different member on vlive please :/ i dont wanna look at both yall ugly mugs lmao” :((

Harry, “Cedric? Ah no he’s not here. Draco? He’s not here either sorry :(. Oh ok, I’ll get Tom for you guys.”

big sad^ :(

ot5 = loving the whole group; EX: “No solo stans allowed!! only ot5 enthusiasts!!!”

it does not mean they all fuck skshs

but All7 means they all fuck harry lmao

there’s this super popular twitter account called “@Sevensfw” and it’s basically just an account that posts bottom harry moans ft other DH members

DH wasn’t that popular before, but a fancam of L.V. dancing blew up on social media, and that got them a lot of attention

there will be lots,,, and lots,, of social media in this fic

we get inspiration from u guys as fans so go off on ur reactions

INFO OF THE MEMBERS UNDER THE CUT :)

MEMBERS

Prince / Severus Snape

Oldest in the group

Prince Stans are called: Robins

Produces most of the songs

Unofficial leader; whenever Harry’s not there he’s automatically in charge and no one questions it

Bat Dad / Goth Daddy

Joined G.G. Entertainment to become a producer but then got stuck with DH

“Nation’s Prince 💞💞💞” - Robins uwu

GENIUS !!!

He’s usually very frowny and makes lots of mean remarks but he’s rlly a soft boy daddy

He, Harry, and Tom are the ones who speak most in interviews

People say he’s lazy because he stays indoors most of the time but!!! He works his ass off helping produce most of the tracks the band makes

AND helps choreograph their dances and help run their big ass dorm

Husband material 10/10

Deep voice mmmm

Big ass softie for their leader

Snape: *makes Harry dance & moan for no reason at all* “all in the name of music.”

He and Harry have been labeled the “Mom & Dad” of DH by Hallows

He and Harry usually discuss big decisions to see what’s best for the group

Only other person he’s comfortable with besides Harry is Tom since they’re closer in age, and work together with choreography

He and Tom are chill buds; the “mature ones of the group”

When he first got into DH, he actually thought Harry was a visual of the group ;)

Harry needs help? Whether it be to get away from Visual Line or just in general Goth Daddy got him 😌

one time he and harry went to another country and couldn’t speak the language, and the waiter thought they were a couple bc of the way they acted around each other so they got a couple discount sksksks

So,, so underrated,,, like please stan this whole ass man

Why wouldn’t you??? like,,, he know how to cook, he humble, he got the tongue technology, husband material, high ass IQ,,, tall, dark,,,, what more can u ask for tbh?

you could also ride his nose lmao but ig thats reserved for Harry

L.V. / Tom Riddle

Visual as FUCK

Has the biggest vocal range; king can go from Deep & Raspy to High & Angelic in 0.001 seconds

One word to describe his voice: soulful

used to be part of the rapline in their early debut days, but for some reason he hasn’t rapped recently?? kows r thirsty pls rap for us again tommy boy,,,

bc of that he’s not “part” of the rapline, so he’s just labeled as a sub-rapper, which means he’s like the backup-backup rapper.

Wanted to be leader and kinda resented Harry for a bit before he met him and now he too, is whipped for Harry

Does not care for personal space, literally just crowds around Harry whenever the fuck he wants

He’s labeled himself as Harry’s personal seat, and is always pulling Harry into his lap

Tom’s never been touchy with others but for some reason Harry is just,,, There. He likes that feeling that Harry gives him whenever he’s around; he’s fascinated about his own actions toward Harry so he’s always trying to explore their physical intimacy

HES GOOD AT EVERYTHING AND HE KNOWS IT; everyone’s just like, “wtf that’s not fair”

Yeah he’s good at everything but he watches anime sksksk 🗿🗿🗿

Lowkey-Highkey dislikes Cedric bc dumb bitch unplugged his computer while he was binge watching bnha & happy go lucky mf named Tom’s fandom KOWs (like cows 🐄), when it was supposed to be Knights of Walpurgis smh

His dance!! His dance sequences always look like fight scenes and it’s the B E S T

Very smooth & quick on his feet

Literally so many fancams of him body rolling

Takes no shit from antis,, they’re not relevant.. only DH & Harry are 😤

Adopts any brand with the initials L.V. And everyone just goes along with it

Tom stans (KOWs) clown pre-debut Tom bc he was gonna have his stage name as “Lord Voldemort” and no one will let him live it down skskks

Was scouted by another agency- that agency asked him to audition for their company but he thought it was a scam; he would’ve been in a diff group if he went

Originally auditioned to G.G. Ent. To become an actor, but changed his mind.

Since he’s also one of the choreographers he’s always trying to make it so he and Harry get lots of skin ship

Draco Malfoy

Harry’s/Ferret’s/Hallows’ sugar daddy no lie

KING OF FANSERVICE

Whatever the fans want? The fans get. Whatever Harry wants? He gets it too.

Draco appreciates his Hallows/Ferrets sm,, he’s always reminding them that they are the ones who keep DH going and that without Hallows they wouldn’t be where they are

He always tries to go on vlive (think: IG live, but better) every 2 weeks even with their busy schedules and just spends time talking with the fans :’)

During concerts he’s interacting the most with everyone, walking around the stage the most so the fans can see him from different views: he’s always trying to make eye contact with them

He’s rich enough he doesn’t have to be an Idol but he still wants to stay ,, he wouldn’t give up DH & Hallows for anything.

also helps with any financial problems the boys have!! they need a place to rent? he got their backs

Center of the group!! This means whenever they’re dancing you’d usually find him in the center/middle position. The center is the one who calls attention to them-self the most and has to make sure their formation looks good; they have to carry the group during a performance. If the center looks bad, then the rest of the group and performance is too.

STABLE AS FUCK VOICE. Do you know how hard it is to dance and sing? At the same time??? Draco makes it so effortless,, when he sings and dances his voice doesn’t shake or waver- It’s stable and whenever he’s doing a live performance his voice sounds like it’s from the actual track

HE LOVES DANCING. Dance dance dance. He joined DH because he really just wanted to dance, he didn’t think he’d be part of the vocal line lmao but ugh king got thru

He & Harry are both 21, and Draco’s always making it a point that he’s older than Harry (only by 2 months!); since they’re the same age, they relate and hang out with each other more. He and Harry usually go out and have “bro-dates”. He talks to Harry abt personal problems n vice versa.

He and Harry always support each other and have formed that bff bond and Draco’s always pulling Harry towards him on stage so Harry will get noticed more (since Harry’s one of the unpopular members, while he himself is veeerry popular)

Antis usually say that Draco doesn’t really have any talent and that he just bought his way into DH with his money and good looks, and that he doesn’t deserve his place as ‘center’ :(

The Confident Gay,,, always slapping that Harry booty.

Cheesy asf,, any chance he gets he always flirts w Harry

Seven / Harry Potter

Best leader 11/10

Always comforting members !! He sings to them to make them happy :)

Main vocal- king can hit that note 😩.

Voice is very calming/lullaby like. Relaxing uwu.

Mother hen lmao,, he’s always worried about his group and how they’re doing

Thighs

Duality king go from 0-10000000 real quick

What a caring bitch I love him

Gives special massages to his members when they feel stressed,, and in turn they help him when he needs to step down from all that leader work.

He’s not really one to do ‘cute things for the fans on purpose’ but when he does he gets really embarrassed,, flustered bb will hide his face behind his hands n cover himself. He’d hide his face in his clothes, on another member’s chest/shoulder, or look at the ground while he stirs in cute embarrassment

Knows the members have some type of fascination with him so he uses that as like a punishment/reward system- “First one to memorize all their lines And choreo gets to go with me to help pick out my clothes.”

Insult his group? Won’t hesitate to cut u with his long eyelashes + sharp tongue lmao

Reassuring Hallows that they’re fine even when they get hate because they have each other,, DH/Hallows is best ship

Blames himself when another member gets hate- he feels like he’s not taking care of his group and he’s trying his best to make them feel not excluded :(

Lil bun bun uwu 🐰Seven Nation !! Stay winning 🤩🤩🤩 Protecc this hard working baby 😩

On stage he’s a force to be reckoned with,, like ugh what a sexy boi hshsh,, but off stage!!! A literal cutie!!!!! Soft & pure

Second half of underrated duo

Built up muscle during debut, but throughout the years/eras he went a bit lax, and since he didn’t have as much muscles since before, he’s gotten a lot of hate :( The members love his squishy cheeks n thicc thighs but antis think he should have a sharper jaw line hhh

oblivious mf,,, he rlly went on a date with a female idol from another company without knowing it was a date hh this boy

actually got in DH because he lost a bet

Zed / Cedric Diggory

Sunshine boy!! ☀️ Literally a ray of happiness in the group,,, always smiling and keeping everyone happy

most popular boy

Chaotic mf,,, in this au he’s the equivalent of the shaggy meme 🗿

Joined DH bc of Harry :’)) He’s gotten offers of joining other agencies but decided to go with G.G. Ent and decline all those offers because he saw Harry sing n dance + had a taste of Harry’s sweet personality when he first met him!! 

Cedric joined when he just turned 15, so Harry and the other members have been raising him for like 4 years :(. He could be a manifestation of all their groups personalities.

Looks up to Harry so much?? He’s Harry’s biggest fan and will literally do anything for him,, Harry’s done so much for him when he was younger that he wants to try and repay his leader by also being there for him :(.

M U S C L E  M A N / STRONG boi

literally harry sat on his back while he did push-ups wtf,, like he doesn’t even get winded if harry runs and jumps in his arms

every hallow who’s been with them since debut (15) to present time (19 going on 20): WHY DID HE GROW UP SO FAST HE HAD CUTE CHEEKS HOW DOES HE HAVE A JAWLINE WTHHHHH

his fandom name: satans

ok like,, cedric used to be a rlly shy boy during the beginning years of debut days and like?? he’s been getting more comfortable and one day he just thought “fuck the agency i do what i want” and he’s so happy now

this is why he’s so chaotic,,, his fandom used to be named “Puffs” but after Cedric’s Big Awakening, the Puffs renamed themselves as “Satans”

“Oh you’re a Hallow, too? Cool! I’m a Robin! :D” “Nice! I’m part of the Satanic cult haha”

earlier i said he was a sunshine but uhhhh

When he’s on stage ohoho,,, damn what a M A N,, like??? spits fire and memes on a daily basis

h a t e s losing,,, “I’m never losing my virginity” “Why??” “BECAUSE I NEVER LOSE”

Harry meanwhile: but u could win me??? 

Cedric is just,, “...” “for the greater good” 

released a solo album called “Spared” (name idea was from L.V. bc Cedric ate his last dumpling; originally wasn’t gonna go with it but Harry liked it lmao)

Spared Title track - “Kill The Spare”

The seventh track on his solo album is called “Septem”, and its basically a song dedicated to Harry and how much he appreciates him as a person, how he’s so thankful to have him and his life,, blah all that mush

Septem = Hedric/Zedven shippers anthem

Cedric has a cool necklace that he always wears and he tells people, “Harry gave me the chain. It had a different pendant but I changed it for this one. It’s the Roman numerals for Seven.” :D

so,, much,, puns its stupid

a crackhead

his whole group is made up of crackheads but he’s the TRUE crackhead  ya feel

this boy is always active on social media im,,, like?? he’s just on vlive talking with the fans and then he’ll show the camera around to where Draco is helping Harry stretch before warm ups (surprise they’re in a compromising position) and Cedric just goes, “Haha! I love friendship :).” 

started his dancing career when he joined DH, so he’s the most behind with dance; many people criticize him bc he’s a “bad dancer” but everyone knows he’s a better dancer than any Hallow

but!! he has improved so much D: sunshine baby rlly went thru it

[96xie]

2019

a whole summary of this difficult year

2019 was full of unexpected good and bad surprises along with lessons and experiences.

january

spent good time with mocha, wayo and brian

had such a good time with guildies from our game

met up with some other ppl from the same game and didnt feel too good bc i was never good with crowds and/or groups that were already well established

tried tinder for the first time because i thought it would be nice to put myself out there for once

feburary

continued my tinder journey and actually had fun with it. it was pretty scary at the same time because it was such a new experience talking to other people and to have them notice you? because i always knew and felt that i wasnt really the desirable one.

actually hooked up with a guy from last months meetup and hung out twice. thought it was going somewhere because he, too, showed signs to progress further ((was wrong because he lied and showed red flags later))

one major red sign to me: no response after genuinely saying thank you for rides and dinner. im the type of person who always says thank you because im honestly grateful for the little and big things. he basically shrugged it off.

also, a huge liar. yah, big no

i brought him to my friends birthday bc they and himself wanted to meet each other, it was fun while it lasted but stuff happened

towards the end of the month, i cut my ties off with him for being awfully mean to me and also cut ties with my “friends” for having really bad assumptions of me.

i was frustrated with myself at that time bc his cats gave me a bad breakout and i felt super ugly. also i wasnt sad over him, but over the fact that i let myself be treated like a second option. eventually i learned that it was good that i didnt let things go further and that i only deserve the very best.

even though i was hurt, i thought it was a good experience, esp since i havent really been in the “dating game” for years. like it was a just a small step to putting myself out there once again

a week later after that a classmate asked me out and got tons of compliments from him and wondered “the universe really works in crazy ways”

march

met some cool people through the same mobile game on a discord server and they were much better than the first group.

also met this really funny dude in the same group. like he was so fun to talk to and he understood my dumb lingo

remember when my classmate asked me out on a date? it turned out a bit weird. but considering this was my first date in YEARS i thought it was a cool experience. got some carne asada fries outta him

i had the dude i was talking to call me so i could leave the date tho LOL ((he helped me lots, esp how to deal with awkward situations with my classmate. also at this point, i really liked talking to him but i wasnt rly sure if i wanted to date other guys bc i had been hurt previously)

this month was pretty much dedicating most of my time talking to him and i enjoyed it alot

also went to pubs for the first time to hangout with my coworkers. such an interesting place

april

tried rollerskating for the first time ever, ended up with a bunch of bruises but it was cool!

also tried 7leaves for the first time and instantly fell in love with mungbean

also went clubbing in sf with my friends and it was such a fun time like i had SO much fun

i got auctioned off of SAD! that phase was just a crazy ride. while there was many that dm’d me, there was only one special person that i only replied to and continued to talk to him on a daily basis

((honestly, i was scared that i was taking things a bit further with him because a part of me was like “are you ready for this?” and “have you really recovered from that guy?” or “can you give this guy your all?” just alot of overthinking))

spent 4/20 at sf with my friends, and overall had a GREAT time. took too many hits and drank so ya gorl was crossfaded. not sure if i wanna do tht again tho

unfortunately woke up with a swollen face and it lasted for a LONG time.

may

so my face is still swollen, still bad, red as a tomato and at this point i was really hesitant to meet up with the guy ive been talking to. i mean!! my skin was SO bad. i felt like i was gonna make a fool out of myself by scaring him away

but,,,, he was still willing to see me despite my appearance and : ( he was so accepting and typing this makes my heart ache bc he is SUCH a good man : (

i met up with the guy towards the end of the month in sj and first thing he does when i walk up to him is give me this great warm hug and so many smooches !!!!!!! like my heart is melting

eventually we became official !!! he got us an airbnb for the night and we jus spent time cuddling on the bed and honestly i : ( i like him so much

june

my birthday wasnt rly that like “wow” it was actually kinda annoying

my bf flew up to sf where we met up, explored the city and slept the night in at an airbnb. next day went to oakland where i introduced my friends to him!

went to my first festival with several with my friends, including ppl from our same guild from our game and it was SO fun

rolled for the first time and it was SUCH an experience. redosed like twice and ended up hallucinating which is something ill def not do again

also i really wished my bf was with me at that time : ( while i had an extremely fun time, i wish i shared that moment with him : (

july

went to vegas for my cousins 22nd bday. shit was wild

also rolled there.

also threw up for the very first time

a fight broke out at the club and that shit was fuckgin CRAZY and it was RIGHT next to our table

also used alot of my money for the whole trip in which nobody really told me about so …. i was like ok.. fuck …

also my skin was still bad during these past months so it was pretty hard masking it

like really hard. with someone with terrible eczema, its just extremely hard to hide it

august

bf flew to sac!!! he met my mom for the first time and we explored the city and stuff

and went on an ikea date! and! honestly i just really loved spending time with him :c

we also spent time with my friends! they came over also! and ate some fuckgin bomb ass waffles

and then took bus down to la to meetup with some friends from our guild towards the end of the month!

it was pretty nice to be able to stay with my bf in his apartment !!!!!

also some scalding tea but thats rly for another time

to make it super short tho: our friend that we’ve known much longer than the girl he met (less than 3 months) dropped our friendship SO quick lol

september

cousin bonding @ beach, too cold for tht doe

towards the end of the month, my bf flew me down!!! so i spent the weekend with him and like always, only had a good time with him!

AND ALWAYS EATING GOOD FOOD!

october

during this fall semester, i took online classes and one of them was a 8week class. there was a topic about mental health and how we can take care of ourselves better and i just thought it was such an important thing to cover. i feel like its not talked about enough

november

spent thanksgiving with my family down in morgan hill and ate good food! honey ham has a special place in my heart.

went black friday shopping first at walmart, lowkey disappointed in myself because i was bummed out the apple watches were sold out. the materialistic part of me jumped out oof

slept at my cousins then went to the mall! didnt get anything besides really good bulgogi fries. i hated going into stores tho cuz everything was literally crowded. hated it !!!!!!!

went to a small festival in sacramento with my friends at the end of the month and this time is 7 of us (than the usual 5)! it was sososo fun.

also took my coworker with me, it was actually amusing to see bc our group were all asian and he’s the only tall white guy

made hotpot at home and we also went out for milktea and waffles again! sooo good.

december

flew down to see my bf again and only had a good time! went to this garden with beautiful lights and ! ugh! SO pretty!

cried in his bed before my flight back, cried on the plane, cried at home and cried before i slept. i miss him

also racked up alot of hours so i could pay for my tuition and my family’s bills. kinda sucks bc im pretty tired but i gotta do what do i gotta do.

christmas was a bit lonely bc my mom went to the philippines and i dont rly talk to my brother but my kuya came the next day and we ate n watched stuff

overall, it was a whacky year. but im so glad to have met ed. he means SO much to me. a part of me was so hesitant to date him because i mean, he’s man with his life set. i dont have a car, im still in school, i have this part time job where im giving my mom all my paychecks and which the only money im keeping is just my tips (not much), i still have issues with myself and other conflicts and honestly theres much to do, learn and grow from. but he’s so supportive, understanding and loving and i love and appreciate him from the bottom of my heart. most of the time i wonder if im doing and if im being enough for him. i worry about that alot but he’s so patient with me. i laugh alot when im with him and i feel so happy.

did i mention that we are long distance? him being in la and me in sacramento. so the only thing thats connecting us is facetime. maybe once every two months will i see him in person but yep. when i had my first panic attack, i really wanted him right next to me. at that moment i felt even more sad because of course you’re gonna want you’re significant other during a moment like that. but anyways, i always miss him and i always want him next to me and i always love him. i want to hurry up and get my education done with so i can be with him. not to sound like omg im so madly infatuated with him type of thing tho. he’s someone who understands me and knows how to love me.

i hope 2020 treats me well despite all the challenges ahead of me.

[angclhyunjin]

of light and verse | jaebum

desc: you literally end up falling for the boy who sits at the back of your uber hard lit class. college!jaebum litmajor!jaebum. all the fluff. just super fluffy

word count: 1.913

requested by: @jaebums-sunshine​ [Jaebum college au/domestic au fluff!]

note: i wrote this at lit 4am but ummm my love as a lit major was too cute to pass up

oh my god ok COLLEGE JAEBUM

setting my heart on fire at the thought of my lit nerd headcanon for him

lets get into it!

so its freshman year and ur walking into your first lit class, a bit intimidated bc its like,, a course no first year dared to touch but u just wanted a cool sounding course so bad u jumped at the opportunity

its GREEK MYTHOLOGY!! who wud not hello

and ur excited until the professor opens her mouth

and ur blown away by how,,,,,,, interesting and riveting the whole thing is but shit is it going to be this hard throughout??

the first few classes involves you frantically taking notes and trying to keep up w the impossible pace this class is going

but theres this BOY

he sits right at the end while ur in front so u could pass him off as uninterested,,, taking the course for extra creds??? wrong

this BOY quips in between the lecture with the most fascinating comments, connecting the odyssey to so many modern works, to poetry and to music

and ur like,,, who made u,,,, how r u like this

ur kind of annoyed by how smart this boy is

its not like you dont get wtf is happening here, but how can he get it and SO MUCH MORE

and tbh ur kind of jealous but u didnt hear that from me. also he has the softest voice that creeps up behind u and makes ur body stir

wait what

so u work super hard

and like super hard, u finish all ur readings and do ur own research

but u still feel like its not enough

like idk who u think u are, u start living at the library

cup of tea in hand and a book in the other, it sounds optimal but the stress is lowkey making you lose ur mind

ur looking for a book in the aisles, a VERY specific one on sappho’s fragmented poems

and FINALLY u see it............on the top most shelf

ur 5′4″ self is SCREAMING

and u could ask for help but help is for losers

so u make the very intelligent decision to climb the shelves what?? no ones looking

ur almost there when

a hand

reaches at the same time as urs

u almost scream for real this time, shutting ur eyes real tight, letting go of ur meager hold on the shelf and falling back

like u have accepted ur death at this point

until???? wait??? you feel two hands around you and suddenly you’re not falling

“my god, are you okay??” how tf do i know this voice

you open your eyes to be met with the softest brown eyes, framed by these wire glasses

oh

its him

of c o u r s e

u literally dont know what to say until he laughs a little at you (an adorable, light noise that fills you up)

“this is probably not one of your greatest moments” ur cheeks are on FIRE

suddenly he notices his arms are still around u and he hastily places u on ur useless jelly feet

“were you going for the book on sappho? i didn’t know anyone else here knew it existed”

you’re about to stammer out a reply, not really ready to explain to the lit prodigy that ur trying to be at least half as insightful as him but he

squints at u

“wait, aren’t you in my lit class?? you are, aren’t you?”

he REMEMBERS ur invisible ass??? ok??? what doesnt this boy notice?????

u finally find your tongue, stammering out a “y-yeah, i was planning out my paper and needed a second reference”

wow is he lowkey impressed he stares at u for a bit

ur now hyperaware of ur messy bun and glasses, the old t shirt you’d tucked into mom jeans feeling so inadequate in front of him in his stylishly messed up hair n button up,,, how could someone be this pretty at 4pm on a sunday

“honestly, me too. but its okay, you can have this” 

he barely needs to reach up to get this book and ur like, looking at his shoulders as he faces away from u for a split second and man is he built

“are you sure???” you let out in an almost whisper “don’t you need this?”

“nah its okay i read it over the summer already” o yes of course

“i’m jaebum by the way” he smiles at you and ur stomach JUMPs

“i’m y/n” you try, and then blurt out “and also really sorry for this i’m like,, dumb as hell-”

“its no issue, y/n” his voice is HONEY as it says your name and you can feel urself turning redder

“i’ll see you in class then” hes gone as quickly as he arrived and ur still in shock because what the fuck

did that really happen or did u doze off after a caffeine crash again???

so the next day in class u walk in, heading towards your seat when  ur eye catches jaebum’s

and he gives u the BIGGEST SMILE

WHAT AN ANGEL

ur blushing furiously and manage a quick smile back

and thru/o ur so distracted bc u swear u feel his eyes on the back of ur neck but ur also too scared to look bc WOW WHY IS THIS BEAUTIFUL BOY STARING AT ME

so at the end of the class ur throwing all ur books into ur mess of a backpack when u hear a voice 

“so did you end up finishing the book”

its god jaebum, beanie hiding his tousled hair and trademark glasses on his nose

“no i still have some stuff to cover but its fine!! you can have it u want-”

“no, no i was going to suggest we do the paper together?”

is this ,,,, really happening

“i mean, sure” WHY ARE U AGREEING WHY DO U WANT TO DIE

“okay great! i’ll meet you in the library at 4?”

“okay see you then!!” u squeak out and dash

wtf was that

this man did not need ur help, he is a lit GOD

but ur there at 4, a little thankful for the heads up bc u managed to put some semblance of makeup on urself

and he walks in and ur heart is on fire again bc hes so pretty and he’s also so excited to do lit, lit makes this boy

u slowly ease into conversations w him, sappho being taken over by more personal deets

ok first of all, this boy has 5 cats

5

he shows u pictures of all of them, names and all, like a mom showing off her children

ur heart is so so full of this endearing boy

you keep meeting thru the rest of the week

on tuesday, he asks you ur favorite color

on wednesday, he convinces u to tell him ur favorite memory

on thursday, you tell him how vanilla ice cream is everything to you but u cant stand strawberry

on friday, he asks u for ur number

on saturday, he randomly texts you 6 pictures of his cat sitting on two legs

on saturday, you realize u have fallen for the boy at the back of ur lit class

u dont know what to do

this boy is so so dumb at heart but can also recite all of shakespeare’s sonnets by heart

like hes the cutest idiot u have ever seen

and ur falling super hard for him

ur friendship goes strong for a while

gradually u blush less frequently and get comfortable w him, going over to his place at times

the first time u go (for lit probably) he opens the door and ur greeted w the smell of disaster

like really it smells super bad

and hes frantic and panicky bc “i didn’t know how hard cooking was the tomato sauce is all burnt what did i do”

poor perfect boi is bad at cooking???

even surrounded w smoke and in a dirty apron he looks ADORABLE

and ur laughing and taking the saucepan off the stove for him, throwing his failure out and suggesting u just get some chinese

and he agrees w a sigh and ur like ur so dumb

and no ur definitely not trying to think abt how he wanted to cook for u

when u call him over u make spaghetti

red sauce

“wow so ur really out here triggering me like this”

“is it my fault ur an idiot sandwich”

“w o w”

he probably pouted and u probably made fun of it tho ur heart was crying 

so it goes on like this for a while

and ur always wondering ‘does this boy even like me like that’ bc he out here giving u so many signals but never making the move

like ur ass is never sure if he’s into u or just being nice

bc lets face it - im jaebum is the definition of nice

and its honestly getting kind of annoying

like pls tell me if u like me my heart cant take it much longer

u guys are at his, doing ur readings

you glance to the side and see jaebum reading intently, eyes flying over the words, relaxed and so sweet, a ray of light from the window falling on him and making his eyes radiate a dark brown

you dont even notice how long you’ve been staring until u hear his voice

“hello what r u doing”

fuck

“nothing! just,,,, you looked really pretty with the light falling on ur face. no i mean, look!! like, you’re pretty”

OK

WHAT

did u JUST 

SAY THAT

"not that that means you’re not pretty at other times!! i mean,,, you’re pretty all the time and its honestly really crazy” WHY ARE U STILL TALKING

hes just.... staring at u in wonder

and ur lik e wow this is it, this is when the ground acc swallows me up and i die

when his face breaks into this beautiful smile

“you think i’m pretty?”

his voice is so soft and pure

u r, on the other hand, about to collapse from embarrassment

and just nod and its like the day in the library all over

and he’s still smiling when he says “y/n, i think you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen”

your stomach SWOOPS

IS THIS REAL LIFE

“i’ve wanted to say that for the longest time” he breathes and you notice just how close he is

“thats just,, i mean wow i didn’t know...” u manage to say

he leans in a little closer and his hands r burning a hole resting on ur thighs

the light is very brilliant as his head dips lower, breath on ur lips until he fills the gap between you

and im jaebum is kissing you

you barely remember to respond, but when you do, he leaves light kisses on ur lower lip, hand coming up to cup ur cheek 

ur entire body is on fire as he draws you closer, your hands going into his hair and feeling for the first time how soft it was 

wow u had really dreamed about this huh

he draws back a little bit, face incredibly close to yours and asks u “is this okay?”

,,,,,,,boi

“more than okay, this is perfect” you press him closer and all else is forgotten

send in requests!

[meatmeinthemiddle-mark]

🌵Flower Shop AU🌷

Hyunjin + Changbin

it's my first time doing this type of content so please reblog and put in the tags what you think and maybe i'll do more!!

and @versekiller wanted a HyunBin au so i gave her one

so changbin's family owns a flower shop

they live above their shop and its super cute

the flower shop is really popular because of that ONE worker

yes that worker is changbin

reason number 1 is bc he is always smiling

all the ladies (young and old) love him so much

HE ALSO WEARS A DIFFERENT COLOURED FLOWER PRINT SHIRT EVERY SINGLE DAY

it's because he doesnt want to ruin the perfect flower aesthetic image of the shop if he only wears black lmao

he started working in the shop during one of his school holidays and his mum basically persuaded him to continue working there bc he brings in so many people

okok so lets start

since changbin wears a different coloured flower print each day

he wore a yellow one one day

but it wasnt flower printed

IT WAS CACTUS PRINTED

he didnt know it because he had to open the shop early that day and was basically half asleep putting on his clothes

he was still doing a great job tho selling loads of flowers to the regulars that day

so changbin was minding his own business sitting at the front of the shop snipping off thorns from roses since there were lesser customers

he was lookin cute wearing his cactus shirt, his apron and his gloves

and he's got his own music (3RACHA obvies) playing in the background

something interrupted his flow

IT WAS A FLASH AND A CLICK

but changbin LOOKS AT THE DAMN SKY

why?

he thought it was lightning and that it was gonna rain

he has to pull out the shelter thingy over the flowers if it does rain

a precious dumbass

but the skies were super blue that day, not even a cloud in the sky

so changbin was like

Eh? Where did that come from?

He looked around before spotting another boy

The other boy was holding a camera and only wearing black

he basically stood out from all the other colourful shops in that lane so he was easy to spot

Changbin chuckled a little looking at the dudes bucket hat (hm i wonder who) but tried to cover it up with a cough

Camera dude panicked and almost dropped his camera

boi he aint slick at all

Changbin took off his gloves and wiped his hands on his apron before approaching the dude

(lmao he forgot he was snipping off thorns)

SO BASICALLY HE ACCIDENTALLY SCRATCHED HIMSELF BUT HE DIDNT KNOW YET

Changbin walks up to the dude and asks if he wanted to buy any flowers (his mum would kill him if he didnt do customer service)

Camera dude was all flustered and held out his hand

"NWLDJWONN SORRY FOR TAKING THE PHOTO OF YOU ITS JUST THAT THE SHOP JUST LOOKED REALLY PRETTY AND I HAVE TO TAKE IT FOR A PROJECT"

Changbin tilted his head back and looked up at the tall camera boy

"nah man its alright we get that a lot, do you still want flowers tho?"

AND CHANGBIN WENT TO SHAKE HIS HAND AND WHEN HE LET IT GO

THERE WAS LIKE BITS OF BLOOD

"Wait omg shit im so sorry i didnt know i scratched myself"

so here we have two boys panicking over blood before changbin's mum called

its not a lot of blood but if u shake someone hand with your own blood its kinda weird

"BINNIE WHO IS THAT, IS IT A FRIEND"

Changbin looked back at his mum and showed her his hand

But camera dude answered back "Hello Auntie, i'm Hyunjin and I think Binnie just cut his hand and theres some blood"

BEODSNDKN CHANGBIN BLUSHED BECAUSE CAMERA DUDE CALLED HIM BINNIE

"Bring him in the shop binnie"

SoooOooO camera dude followed behind Changbin into the shop to wash his hands

"Sorry for getting blood on your hands Hyunjin"

"Thats ok binnie" and Hyunjin flashed a really cute smile which made changbin all shy

BUT CHANGBIN TRYNA ACT FAKE TOUGH

"Please call me Changbin, my mum calls me Binnie just to embarrass me"

"But Binnie sounds cuter" is2g hyunjin is so smooth im gonna die

so they finished washing their hands and hyunjin looks around the shop

"Do you mind if i take more photos outside the store, the flowers are really pretty"

in changbin's head he's all like "Omg what is this dude on about he is even prettier than the flowers we sell oh my"

irl, changbin just nods his head and goes back to his seat at the front of the store snipping off more thorns

Hyunjin was snapping lots of photos of the flowers and the store and then he suddenly laughed

"Binnie you stand out from the flowers so much with that yellow cactus shirt"

Changbin was all confuzzled and hyunjin showed him the photo

The photo had changbin in it and all the flowers were behind him

changbin was the main focus of the photo

HO DAMN ITS A GOOD ASS PHOTO THO

"Hey youre a pretty good photographer"

"Well you are a pretty good focus point"

"What"

changbin turned to face hyunjin and OOPS

THEIR FACES WERE SO CLOSE LIKE IN THAT ONE EPISODE OF STRAY CUTS

Hyunjin has his eyes covered by his bucket hat so changbin couldnt see what hyunjin was staring at

TRUTH WAS HYUNJIN WAS TRYING NOT TO STARE AT THE PHOTO OR ELSE HE'LL GET ALL FIDGETY AND BLUSHY

HE WAS ALSO TRYNA LEAN AWAY FROM CHANGBINS PRESENCE

"Do you wanna bring any of the flowers home, if you wanna take more photos of them"

"Can I have some cactuses?" hyunjin asked bashfully

ok so if camera dude wants a cactus imma get him one so changbin looked around the store to find

hyunjin was lowkey disappointed changbin didnt get his pickup line

"Oh man, I dont think theres any cacti left tho" Changbin was super apologetic that he couldnt get cute camera dude a cactus

Hyunjin pointed at Changbin's shirt and waited for his response

CHANGBIN HAD TO PROCESS

damn he a slow one tho

So Hyunjin straight up said "Do you wanna get some coffee sometime?"

CHANGBIN.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING

Changbin: "You're not expecting me to bring flowers arent you"

Hyunjin: "I'll bring a cactus for you dont worry, are you gonna show up in another printed shirt?"

"maybe"

if u listen carefully changbin's mum is giggling at the background with changbin's dad

the next time they met changbin was wearing a black shirt with red roses on them

and hyunjin was still wearing the black bucket hat

HE FORGOT TO BRING A CACTUS BECAUSE CHANGBIN'S STORE DIDNT HAVE ANY

[drashleighreid]

ALLLLLL 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

oooo snap dude! 

1. Who did you first come out to, if anyone?

the first time i remember having an actual *+*+ coming out moment with was probably my host mom. i mean id been like actively out in certain circles before that for a while but it was the first time i was genuinely nervous about it and felt like i was doing the whole*+*+ thing 

2. Favorite LGBT singer/instrumentalist?

i actually really love mary lambert bc she covers my childhood faves but makes em GAY 

3. What’s your gender + orientation?

f lesbian 

4. Who’s the best Gay Icon™?

hmmm idk ! can i say britney spears lmao 

5. Do you have a partner?

no : (

6. How long did your questioning process take (if you’re not still going through it)?

oh worm ! lol i dont know an exact amount of time. i kinda went like .... oh im straight ...... ohhh ok maybe im bi ....... im pan i love everyone !!! now im like wow women are iconic ! (even tho i identify as lesbian i still dont know what the fuck is going on ?? i still stand by the fact that sexuality is fluid n this could change at some point !! but women rock and men make me uncomfortable so lol ! thats where im at and its valid ! )

7. What movie/video game/TV shows have you stolen from the straights?

hmm ! i dont really know what this means tbh ??? like ?? a straight thing that i like or one that i wish was gay or wat ? :s

8. What’s your favorite color?

orange ! 

9. Do you go to a support/pride group?

no i dont! i always think about joining the university one in O week but then im always too nervous to go up to them and i stupidly i dont like joining groups n going to events by myself lol even tho i know thats how u meet people ! anyway ! disaster lesbian here 

10. Have you ever been to a pride event?

i actually havent ! fake 

11. What’s your favorite thing about your flag(s)?

its pretty & sof ! it makes me wanna eat raspberries 

12. Favorite LGBT artist/writer?

oo i actually have no idea ! i havent read much in a looong ass time nd dont really follow artists that much 

13. How often do you get tired of The Straights?

every damn day my pal 

14. How do you express your sexuality/gender?

im more confident in expressing it online through my shitposting lol. irl im not as open about my sexuality. ive tried to be a little more this year but it left me feeling a little uncomfortable because of the situation. i dont really think about //expressing// my sexuality or gender that much. i dont dress in a certain way or anything that is explicitly +*+*+gay lol

15. Has Tumblr been more harmful of beneficial to you when it comes to discussing LGBT issues or figuring yourself out?

more beneficial. its a space where i actually feel comfortable and confident to be gay. im super proud of my sexuality but like ?? sometimes even when u feel that love n passion toward it some RL circumstances can lowkey drag u thru the mud so its a nice place to come and be unapologetically gay tbh ! fandom has been good for this too. like coming on here and reading fic and seeing art etc abt beautiful wonderful wlw is so lovely and makes my heart feel so nice and soft ! and sharing this experience with other people on here has been all around a pretty wholesome nurturing experience and im pretty grateful for that. 

16. What LGBT charities/organizations do you support?

there aren’t really any i follow specifically and i dont have a lot of money so its hard to give to things but i do appreciate the organisations trying to help lgbt ppl ! i know there are a lot out there. ive bought things from love is louder before because im a fuckin slut for britt snow and i really appreciate what she’s doing with that does that count lmao 

17. Distinguished, functional, or disaster?

im somewhere between functional and disaster depending on the day. 

18. Favorite LGBT film or actor?

i really enjoyed love, simon... also i liked below her mouth even tho its kinda mostly porn lol. my favorite film of all time is Frida which i mean? counts right. and actor omg there are sOOOO many ! i friggin love stephanie beatriz tbh but there are a lot of badass lgbt ppl out there 

19. Is your current environment supportive?

i mean... yeah... i live with a rly queer nb gay af person who literally writes and performs theatre shows abt being queer so being gay is something we really celebrate here! id really like to have more gay friends here who i can hang out with tho it would make it a lot more enjoyable ! 

20. What are your plans for this June?

nothing too exciting or gay sadly lol. im going home to qld to visit my family for a while so nothing super gay will be occurring lol. 3thank you so much my dear xx i hope you’re having a fabulous pride time. 

[phandomsecretvalentines]

Love; not wrong (brave)

Happy valentines day 💞💞 i hope u have a great day, where ever you are and whatever you do.

This is litteraly just 4k words of fluffy stuff (although phil’s lowkey drunk in one of the prompts, nothing happens other than him ranting about how perfect dan is, but if you dont like that stuff its the 14th. Theres also a few loose mentions of depression and feelings of anxiety but nothing dan and phil dont say themselves. Also swearing bcuz dan. Happy endings thoo, i mean its just oneshots lmao). I hope you like it tho it was v fun to write. All the prompts are from @inlovesuggest (i got their permisson).

(Also the numbers at the begining of some of them like “[10]” are what year it takes place in, if i think its important to include. If thats not there it can take place whenever makes sense but probably 2017/18)

Yeahhh hope you enjoy! @dan-matian (from @butterscotchwithwhitemalteasers)

(I’ll stop overexplaining now) ———- ———- ❝ i have a feeling im gonna love you for a long long time ❞ ———- [09] ———- It was the day after when Phil realised he might be in love.

After the anticipation, after the endless butterflies, after the sunset Skybar dates.

They were lying on Phil’s family sofa together, rewatching episodes of Buffy in comfortable silence. Dan’s head was laying on Phil’s chest as Phil ran his fingers through Dan’s hair, it was curling at the tips now.

Dan started giggling at some cheesy joke, and hid his smile in his hands. His red patch flared up, his dimples grew, eyes crinkled. He did have a pretty laugh.

Phil titled his head and gave Dan a look.

“I’m not laughing! Shut up.” Dan’s face turned red-rose as he pushed it inside Phil’s shirt.

Phil couldn’t help the huge grin that spread across his face.

“You were. But I was just thinking.”

“About what?”

“You’re kinda cute,”

“Oh.”

Dan’s face got even more rosy, if that was possible.

“And I think I might love you.” ———- ❝ The sound of your voice makes me realize everything is ok, as long as I’m by your side. ❞ ———- [16] ———- Even after years of doing tours and books, Phil still felt nervous on stage.

Thousands of people watching him live, expecting, hoping.

He knew they loved him, but that didn’t console the pit in his stomach whenever he was about to step on.

What did help, however, was Dan.

Dan being there. His slightly posh voice, his half-confident-half-slacking posture. His arm, brushing against Phil’s, as he rushed off to go do something; or just so they could touch for a brief moment.

It was almost time to head on. Phil could hear the audience and the pre-show music Dan set, he could feel the anticipation in the air.

Unlike Dan, Phil was a shy kid. He didn’t do drama, he didn’t preform. This wasn’t him.

Dan’s fingers loosely touched against Phil’s arm, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“We go on in five.”

Phil smiled nervously.

“Okay.”

“We’ll be fine.”

As long as they’re together. ———- ❝ when it works out, love is incredible. it’s not overrated; there’s a reason for all the songs ❞ ———- [16] ———- Before the past years, Dan had never cared for love songs.

It’s not that he thought they were bad, or that he wouldn’t listen to them, he just found them rather unrelatable and boring. How many times does one have to listen to someone sing about the touch of another person?

But then he fell in love.

Truly, truly fell in love. Not teenage romance, not a Saturday night hookup, not an unrequited crush. True, mutual, comfortable love.

And he found himself relating to the songs he found so boring.

Suddenly, every overplayed radio song was about Phil.

Every ‘his lips tasted like candy’ was about the specific sweet-sour wine of Phil’s lips on a loud Friday night and a calm Wednesday morning.

Every 'I could spend forever with you’ was not an over exaggeration, but rather, true.

Why wouldn’t he spend forever with Phil? It just made sense.

Every love song made sense.

He had girlfriends before, and a boyfriend too. But Phil was the first one to ever make him realise why people wished to be in love. ———- ❝ when i say “i love you” it’s not out of habit, it’s to remind you that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me ❞ ———- Compared to other people, maybe Dan and Phil didn’t say 'I love you’ much.

They decided, after a while, they’d rather show it.

So maybe Phil wouldn’t always say 'I love you’ before bed, but he would cook dinner more days a week than Dan.

He would take care of Dan when Dan couldn’t take care of himself. Phil would always cover anything for Dan, because he knew sometimes he needed it, even if he didn’t say.

He would make sure Dan got home safe, even when he only went out for milk. He’d even go out and get milk for Dan, if he was feeling far too overwhelmed to leave home that day.

And yeah, Dan might not always whisper 'I love you’ during early morning breakfasts, but he would take care of Phil when he was feeling poorly.

He would do more editing for the gaming channel, and he cleaned up the house far more. He tried to do most of their paperwork, because it often stressed Phil.

He would put his cereal in the same place every time, even when Phil always stole it.

But sometimes they would say I love you.

Sometimes, they would wake up and breathe it into each other’s ear.

Sometimes, they would make dinner and hum, in a tone, “I lovvveeee youuuuuuuu,” while putting it on the table.

Sometimes, they would sneak up behind each other while they edited, and scream it so loud that the other jumped off the sofa.

Sometimes, Phil would whisper it to Dan when Dan was too depressed to care.

Sometimes, Dan would mutter it to Phil when he was already far past asleep.

But they both always knew. ———- ❝ those knowing looks you give me from across the room are enough to make me want to stay in this place ❞ ———- Dan hated business meetings.

He hated going outside, he hated going into a building full of near-strangers, he hated talking to said strangers, he hated trying to understand complicated business concepts at far-too-early o'clock.

He wanted to leave.

Phil insisted, always, that he could go alone. It would be fine. Dan didn’t need to be there, and he didn’t mind.

Dan never took him up on the offer, he wasn’t that selfish.

So there he was, a Monday afternoon, looking out the window and bored out of his mind. He felt like he was in secondary school again; complicated concepts, boring statistics, and an unfocused mind. What was even so much better as an adult?

Dan felt Phil nudge his knee with a foot.

“You okay?” He whispered.

Right. That’s what was better. He had Phil.

“Yeah, just bored.”

“Me too, but there’s only fourty minutes left. You’ll be fine.”

Not for the first time, Dan admired Phil’s sensibility to always bring a watch to meetings.

They had both agreed that checking your phone looked quite rude, but checking a £3 Hello Kitty watch was a lot more subtle.

“Thanks.”

Phil gave Dan a small smile from across the table, and suddenly, maybe business meetings with Phil weren’t the worst place he could be. ———- ❝ we were dancing like idiots in the parking lot to our favourite bands people were staring but your dumb smile was enough to make me not care. ❞ ———- [10] ———- //“Change, Everything you are And everything you were”//

Dan never thought he would be the one slow-dancing in a parking lot at one in the morning, but apparently love mixed with sleepless nights is a hell of a drug.

//“Your number has been called Fights, battles have begun Revenge will surely come Your hard times are ahead”//

'Butterflies and Hurricanes’ played in the background, music surrounding them. It wasn’t a favourite Muse song for either of them, but it was perfect for the night.

Phil wasn’t the best dancer, Dan could admit. But neither was he, really. And it didn’t matter. They were together.

//“Best, You’ve got to be the best You’ve got to change the world”//

People were watching them, judging, or just confused. He was sure.

But when he looked up and saw Phil’s tired smile, and felt a soft kiss press his lips, he couldn’t bring himself to care.

And so they danced, a Saturday night, in a parking lot, to a Muse song.

//“And you use this chance to be heard Your time is now”//

And Dan had never felt so content. ———- ❝ maybe i could become a morning person if my mornings started next to you ❞ ———- [11] ———- It was no secret that Phil wasn’t a morning person.

Usually, he needed at least two cups of coffee and a bowl of cereal before you could even think about talking to him.

However, when he woke up with a sleeping Dan next to him, he found it hard to feel annoyed.

Dan was wrapped all around Phil, hand clutching his shirt tightly, their legs intertwined. His mouth was slightly opened, and although he didn’t snore, Phil could hear his soft breath.

He looked so young sometimes.

Dan started to open his eyes, having felt Phil’s body move.

“Mhmm?”

“Dan, I can’t reach my phone.”

Dan’s face scrunched up in distaste, “Don’t need it. 'Have me.”

Dan pulled Phil tightly into a half-hug, pinning him back down under the blankets.

He nuzzled his head into Phil’s neck, closing his eyes as his breathing steadied out again.

Maybe Phil didn’t actually mind mornings that much. ———- ❝ your laugh reminds me of all the good in the world ❞ ———- [15] ———- Dan had always loved Phil’s laugh.

From old videos, to Skype, to in person, to on the sofa next to him at three in the afternoon.

They were playing Mario Cart 8, and Dan wasn’t having the best luck. Despite being arguably worse, Phil had won every round so far, or at least gotten ahead of Dan.

Dan had managed to fling himself off the track entirely— for the fifteenth time that day— and Phil was laughing so hard Dan worried he might burst.

Dan’s favourite laugh of Phil’s.

His tounge-through-teeth laugh, where he tried to cover it with his hands but always gave in, ending up with smile lines and blushed cheeks.

Dan couldn’t stop staring. He had caused that.

He knew it was just a game of Mario Cart, that he made Phil laugh an endless amount of times, but occasionally it just hit him.

Not to romanticize, but Dan swore Phil’s laugh sounded like actual angels. It sounded like young children playing while their parents looked on; like every good thing to ever have existed, all at once. It reminded him of what happiness felt like.

“You okay Dan?”

Dan hadn’t realised how long he’d been staring for.

“Yeah. By the way, I like your laugh. Sounds nice.”

“Odd compliment, but thanks.” ———- ❝ wrapped in your arms, I feel so safe and calm. ❞ ———- Today had been a day.

Paperwork got mixed up, a venue had a miscommunication and lost a row of seats, and Phil’s birthday was in less than a week.

It was a lot for Dan at once, and he was so fucking tired.

“Phil! I need your help looking this over.”

Phil was on the phone, ordering dinner.

'Can it wait?’ He mouthed silently.

Dan shook his head violently. He was just about fed up.

Phil rolled his eyes, and muttered 'Be right back, emergency.’ into his phone.

“Alright, what?”

Dan squeezed his eyes shut tightly, shaking his head.

“I don’t know. Wait— Yes. I do know. It just is a bit blurry, in my head. Since I’m tired. Can you just explain what they said to call them for I’m really tired.”

Phil looked softly at Dan.

“It’s okay to take a break, Dan. It’s late. We can have dinner and go to bed or watch a movie.”

“No, I need this done tonight. You don’t understand. I need it perfect.”

“Not everything needs to be perfect.”

“Yes! Shit, yes. It does—”

Dan was exhausted.

Phil hugged Dan.

Dan eased into Phil’s embrace, hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I’m tired,”

“I know.”

“And so stressed.”

Phil kissed Dan’s forehead.

“I know, let’s lie down.”

Phil grabbed his phone, finished ordering their food, and lay on the sofa with Dan.

Dan nudged into Phil’s arms, closing his eyes.

Phil lightly kissed him, and held him closer.

“You can nap for a bit, if you want. The food is fourty minutes away. I’ll be here.”

Dan sighed contently.

“Thank you.” ———- ❝ my hands are cold, would you mind holding them? ❞ ———- [11] ———- “It’s snowing.”

Dan and Phil were sitting on Phil’s balcony, sipping hot coco.

“It is,”

“It’s cold.” Dan smiled innocently at Phil.

“Yes? Do you need mittens? I think I have a pair—”

“Can you hold my hand?”

“Oh-” Phil went bright pink, “Sure, yeah, okay.”

He reached out and tapped his fingers nervously against Dan’s free hand, before interlocking them.

“Thanks.”

“No problem. It is really cold, actually.”

Dan laughed, “Yeah, I know! It actually is snowing out, it wasn’t all a ploy.”

Phil smiled warmly.

“I like holding your hand.”

“We are doing this for warmth and survival only, you dork. But, I like holding your hand too.” ———- ❝ Just the two of us, cuddling at late night. Enjoying the silence, and the presence of each other. I fall asleep in your chest, hearing your heartbeats ❞ ———- It was 2am, they’re watching a Studio Ghibli movie.

Or at least, they were, until the credits rolled and they were too lazy to pick another one.

So now, they were lying on the sofa, listening to the silence and the others heartbeat.

Dan’s head was on Phil’s chest, a grin as he heard Phil’s soft breathing.

Phil was running his fingers through Dan’s curls, twirling each one.

Dan’s eyelids slowly difted closed, and his breathing evened out.

“Goodnight, Danny.” Phil whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Dan smiled within his sleep. ———- ❝ i never want to know what life is like without you again ❞ ———- [17] ———- In more ways than one, Dan and Phil ran on parallel tracks.

Their thoughts, but their actions too. Their daily lives so delicately intertwined.

They would wake up together, one kissing the other or just the sound of an aggressively loud alarm.

They would get dressed, take showers, brush their teeth, fix their hair, in turns. Perfectly in sync. A well oiled machine.

One of them would make breakfast, or they both would. Coffee, tea, cereal. A petty argument about stolen cereal, sometimes, then a slice of toast.

They would watch TV, or an anime, but today they watched Undercover Cops. Phil wanted to spice it up a bit.

After that, they’d sit in the lounge, doing nothing, editing, or any mix of the two.

Eventually, one of them would get hungry, and they would order or cook. Today it was order, burritos from a local mexican place and salads.

After they ate, Dan would take off somewhere else to do something else. Piano, games, or random things around the house. Phil might join him, but not always. This was as much space as they needed.

After that, Dan would return in exercise clothes with yoga mats. Phil would go off to change, and would return. Either yoga or some standard workout, nothing too much, but enough to make Dan okay. Phil never minded it.

After that, they would return to the lounge and relax for a while. Maybe catch up on a show. Other times, they might film a gaming video, or even a main channel video if one was prepared.

Then one would be hungry again, and they would make dinner. Sometimes they ordered, but less and less, since Dan’s therapist recommended healthy home-cooked meals. They decided on Indian food, Tandoori Chicken and Rice, with a Stir-Fry.

After dinner, Dan would go play games, and Phil might too. Or maybe watch a show Dan didn’t care for. Maybe clean up a bit more. Always something, though. Unless it was a nothing day.

Sometime at night, they would get tired. They’d head off to bed, maybe Dan would want to shower again. They would just lay with each other, until the comfort of the other persons presence lulled them both to sleep.

They worked well together, and had done for years. It was hard to remember a time before they were each others lives.

Rarely ever alone. ———- ❝ a concept: holding hands while walking along the beach as the sun sets next to us and we kiss and we kiss and we kiss and mmmaybe kiss ❞ ———- [10] ———- After four hours, Dan and Phil had finally managed to escape from the rest of the group.

Now they were walking down the sandy beach, awkwardly watching the sunset, side by side.

Neither one really knew what they were doing, neither really cared.

The sky had just reached that violet-red-orange ice-creamed mix when Phil intertwined his fingers with Dan’s.

Dan looked up at him, pink cheeks.

They glanced at each other for a second longer, then continued walking.

“You do realise we’re literally doing that romantic-walk-on-the-beach cliché thing?”

“Yeah, but it’s nice.”

“It is,”

Dan looked into Phil’s eyes a moment, then softly pressed their lips together. ———- ❝ i love the way you sound at 3am and how you look when you smile. it’s addicting ❞ ———- [09] ———- It was three in the morning, and Phil had decided that Dan was pretty.

And not the flowy-hair-model pretty, but the timeless one. The one where your features are just— perfect.

Phil couldn’t even think of a proper describing word; although that may be the three glasses of wine he had earlier.

He looked at Dan’s fuzzy image through his laptop, admiring. Dan had been attempting to play piano, but gave up and was just lying on his bed now.

“You’re pretty.” Phil whispered.

Dan blushed. How adorable.

“Thanks?”

“Really. Timelessly beautiful. And sexy, and handsome and hot and gorgeous and every other good word. You’re— Dan. That’s perfect. Dan is a good word.”

Dan grinned wide at Phil’s drunken rambles.

“I–”

“And your voice, it’s just nice. Calming. You think it’s too posh or whatever but it’s not. It’s great Dan. It’s Dan! That’s a good thing. I love it. One day I wanna fall asleep to it and wake up to it and—”

Phil teared up at this. He wanted to be with Dan forever, and he knew it.

“Dan, I,”

Dan was looking a bit confused now.

“Yeah, Phil? Are you okay?”

“You’re pretty, Dan. That’s all. But that’s not all at all.” ———- ❝ being old doesn’t seem too awful when i think about growing old with you ❞ ———- [18] ———- Phil sighed, rolling over in bed.

“I’m thirty-one now.”

Dan smiled, “Yeah?”

“That’s pretty old.”

“Not that old, honestly.” Dan laughed quietly, “You’re barely over your twenties.”

“People my age have families,” Phil stares at the ceiling, unblinking. “They’re married with a house.”

“Kids don’t make you old, Phil. People have kids at sixteen, my mum had me at ninteen for God’s sake. And anyone can buy a house, anyone can get married.”

Phil leaned on his side to look at Dan. “You know what I mean—I could. I haven’t done that much, I’m getting old. I could die tommorow.”

Dan’s turn to sigh.

“You could’ve died yesterday, Philly.” He smiles fondly, “And you have done so, so, much. Really. You’ve gone to University, had three homes, have four million fans, gone on tour—there’s more to life than just domestic stuff. And if you want domestic stuff, we can do that too. Forever home, dog, eventually marriage and kids.”

“I know,”

“What’s the issue?”

“I dunno. I just don’t wanna die. I don’t want to be old, really. I don’t know.”

Dan glanced at him.

“You’re gonna be old. We’ll be old together. Like the great poet Ed Sheeran once said, 'I’ll be loving you 'till we’re seventy,’”

Phil giggles, “Maybe you’re right. It’ll be fun with you. You make things fun.”

“Yup. I’ll always love you, even when you have grey hair that you still dye black, and wrinkles, and smell like bad cologne.”

“Always.” ———- ❝ when it works out, love is incredible. it’s not overrated; there’s a reason for all the songs ❞ ———- [16] ———- Before the past years, Dan had never cared for love songs.

It’s not that he thought they were bad, or that he wouldn’t listen to them, he just found them rather unrelatable and boring. How many times does one have to listen to someone sing about the touch of another person?

But then he fell in love.

Truly, truly fell in love. Not teenage romance, not a Saturday night hookup, not an unrequited crush. True, mutual, comfortable love.

And he found himself relating to the songs he found so boring.

Suddenly, every overplayed radio song was about Phil.

Every 'his lips tasted like candy’ was about the specific sweet-sour wine of Phil’s lips on a loud Friday night and a calm Wednesday morning.

Every 'I could spend forever with you’ was not an over exaggeration, but rather, true.

Why wouldn’t he spend forever with Phil? It just made sense.

Every love song made sense.

He had girlfriends before, and a boyfriend too. But Phil was the first one to ever make him realise why people wished to be in love. ———- ❝ How dare you make me smile so hard that my face hurts when you’re so far away? ❞ ———- “Well this feels like déjà vu.”

Dan was sitting on their bed, laptop opened to Skype, smiling at Phil.

Phil was at his parent’s house, sitting on a guest bed, smiling back.

“You’re right. I have too many memories of nights like these.” Phil laughs half-heartedly.

“I probably would’ve just come with you, if I didn’t have a video to film.”

“I know. And remember to send me the file when you’re done so I can watch over it.”

“Yes, Dad.” Dan rolled his eyes fondly.

“It’s your regret, Daniel.”

Dan sighed, “I miss you.”

Phil smiled back, sadly, “I miss you too. But it’s only a few days, don’t worry. Just edit.”

“I remember a lot of nights back then, saying how one day we would never have to Skype again, yet here we are.”

“Stop being melodramatic Dan, it’s only a weekend for my mum’s birthday. We’ll live.”

“Will we? Because I swear I’m dddddyyyinnngggg!” Dan flopped down on the bed, pretending to faint, and they both fall into a fit of giggles.

“Noooo Danny! Don’t go into the light!”

“It’s too late… I can—see God… she’s coming for me…”

“Dannnnnnn! Nooo!” Phil put his hand over his heart and sobbed dramatically.

“God is Ribena Phil, but you didn’t hear that from me.”

They both burst into uncontrollable laughter at this, tears streaming down Dan’s face, struggling to catch their breath.

“Oh my god, Dan!”

“Oh my—Oh my Ribena, you mean!—”

They both gasped for air, Dan’s cheeks hurt from smiling so hard.

“Of course, how dare I!?”

Once the laughter had settled down and they were both softly smiling again, Dan sighed.

“I still wish you weren’t so far. I want to be with you.”

Phil smirked, “Don’t you mean 'I wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone’?”

“Shut up! Why do you even remember that?” Dan blushed and hid his face in a pillow.

Old feelings, old love. ———- ❝ in your kiss, I felt at peace ❞ ———- [09] ———- Butterflies.

Dan looks at Phil, Phil looks at Dan.

Dan tilts his head to the side.

His head is beating fast, but his heart is beating faster.

Phil is beautiful.

Now or never.

Butterflies.

Two lips, just two lips.

Soft. Phil’s lips are very soft. And sweet like honey.

Butterflies and honey.

A winning combination for your butterflies to get all sticky and trapped, and for you to feel brave.

Honey is sweet, like Phil’s lips.

Phil’s lips are better than honey.

This isn’t Dan’s first kiss, but it might as well be. This feels more important.

Honey.

Butterflies.

Honey is sweet.

Phil’s lips are sweeter.

“Thank you.” ———-

[littlespaceporgs]

The Clone Wars Reacts - Part 3

Alternatively, Leah misses daddy Plo, gets annoyed by droids and is thoroughly entertained by Jar Jar Binks while simultaneously simping for Padme.

TA~DA! Welcome to part 3 of the reacts series, where we cover episodes 6, 7 and 8! I won’t lie to you, I actually found episode 6 really boring, 7 was less boring and 8 was maybe a little bit funny and I lowkey enjoyed it so much. So yeah, the first two reacts are kinda boring because I was super bored, but 8 is kinda funny. As usual, major spoilers for season 1 of the clone wars.

Part 1 - Episodes 1 and 2 Part 2 - Episodes 3, 4 and 5

So, lets do thissssss!

Tags (as always, let me know if you want a tag!): @acciokenobi​ @roseofalderaan​ @catsnkooks​ @peacelandbread​ @littlevodika​ @icedcoffeeandgays​ @captainrexstan​ @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky​ @mcu-padawan​ @onabouteverything​ @fractiouskat​

Episode 6: Downfall of a Droid

Notes: since writing these, I’ve discovered that I am 100% without a doubt very much a simp for Plo Koon and it shows.

> Pre-warning, I’m writing this on paper and on the train, so there may be slightly less thots thoughts in this one

> “Suffering serious defeats by Grievous”??????? All we’ve seen for 5 episodes now is Grievous lose????????

> Yeah Anakin! You should listen to Ahsoka!

>> (you need to trust my babey)

> Where the fuck is Plo when you need him? I WANNA SEE HIM

> Maybe that image will tide me over? (we all know it wont but that’s off topic)

> Oh for fucks sake I’ve had enough of Grievous

> YEAH R2, WE ALL KNOW YOURE THE ONLY REASON ANAKIN IS ALIVE!

> “this is too easy” oooohhhhh boy, you say that now......

*Grievous ditches his ship*

> ✨ disappointed, but not surprised ✨

> THERE IT IS!!!!! “I got a bad feeling about this” - bringing the total count so far to 2

> W H A T

>> R2D2?????????????????????????

>>> EXCUSE ME WTF?!?!?!?! DID THEY JUST - R2D2 NO!

> OBI WAN HOW DARE YOU R2D2 IS NOT REPLACEABLE

>> This is one of the few times I am more annoyed with Obi-wan than I am horny for him

>>> Wait no scratch that - i just looked at his face again 💖💖💖💖

> I miss Plo already, can he come back now?

> Oh Ahsoka, you’re so cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

> omg Goldie???? I LOVE IT he’s kinda adorable

> ooooohhh boy R2 is going to be on that dodgy ass ship isnt he?

> hahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahah

>> fart humour, i love it!

> Unique items, huh

> OH SHIT THATS THE TYPE OF DROID FROM THE MANDALORIAN

>> just thinking about the mandalorian reminds me of the new armour/helmet kink i discovered I had and how much i love pedro pascal

> Goddammit R3. oh shit oh shit bad droids BAD DROIDS

> is R2 just a really good droid? or do all of them make this many mistakes???

> hahahaha ‘gramps’, Ahsoka he’s literally only 5/6 years older than you

> *GASP* Anakin, he’s not a lightswitch!

> Oh shit, R2 was on the ship!

>> HA HA I WAS RIGHT

> fuck fuck Grievous no dont take R2 bad droid

> okay, I love obi-wan but he’s being a little harsh

>> mild turn-on but ok 👀👀

> aaaawwww the little stomping when he’s excited

> Do we get to see R2 do a mad escape?

>> WE DO!

> oh no, R2 you were so close

> tracking beacon?! R3, what’re you doing?!

> sorry anakin, they definitely saw it

> R3 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THE HYPERDRIVE TOO?

> YEAH AHSOKA, YOU SAVE ANAKIN’S BUTT

> You, know, I’m starting to wonder if R3 is doing all this deliberately??

> lowkey, I want to tally the amount of droids grievous hurts/destroys

> well, i want R2 back in the next episode, please and thank you.

Episode 7: Duel of the Droids

> Okay, all I want is for Anakin to hurry up and find R2, because I want this arc to be over

> I’m going to keep this reacts fairly short because I’m a little bit bored

> All I want is more Plo content, is that too much to ask???????

>> If you can’t tell I have a thing for Plo Koon and I officially joined the simp club for him.

> This trandoshan guy is just.... bleh 🤢

* insert gross shiver* 

> YEAH R2 YOURE DOING SO WELL! HOLY SHIT GO R2D2!!!!

> I said it in part 1, and I’ll say it again, R2′s whirring is a mood

> Okay so fucking R3 just turned R2 down, so I am definitely starting to think this is deliberate?

>> HOLY FUCK I JUST REALISED A THING! DUEL OF THE DROIDS???????? R3 VS R2??????????????????

> ANAKIN IGNORE OBI-WAN LIKE USUAL, YOU GO AND SAVE R2 OK?!

> Rex’s expression when he’s told to carry R3 is comedy gold by the way

> Oh please Captain, kindly fuck me

> FUCK YEAH AHSOKA!

> *sighs* Oh the droid humour

> I mean, it is a type of head adjustment I guess 🤷‍♀️

> ...

>> Did you seriously think grievous, being the slimy bastard he is, wasn’t going to kill you?????

> OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT I WAS RIGHT FUCK R3 MAN

> AHSOKA KICK GRIEVOUS’ BIN CHICKEN LOOKI- oh no she was thrown into a wall, never-mind.

> R2 YES ZAP THAT GODDAMN DROID AND SAVE ANAKIN

> oh this is awkward, I love how R2 is insulted that he got R3 hahahahahahahha

> YES AHSOKA YOURE RIGHT, HE IS A STUBBY LITTLE BACKSTABER

> okay the most interesting point of this episode is ahsoka is escaping grievous

> OH MY GOD I WAS RIGHT AGAIN?! R2 AND R3 ARE DUELLING!!!! I CAN SEE THE FUTURE OR SOME SHIT LIKE A JEDI

> THATS RIGHT BITCH R2D2 IS BETTER

> anakin looking out for R2 is the cutest shit I’ve ever seen

> ngl, i had a small degree of satisfaction when I saw R3 get smashed to bits

> “oh anakin... one day” obi-wan is a mood

> oh thank god its over, alright what’s up next?

Episode 8: Bombad Jedi

> HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH DOES THIS ONE HAVE JAR JAR IN IT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

> please tell me it has jar jar in it, then it will surely be funnier than the last 2 eps

> OH SHIT THIS EPISODE HAS PADME TOO IM SO HAPPY YAY

> oh in the white outfit too, i love this woman so much

> I’m going to put a photo hear so you can appreciate it too

> My horny bisexual senses are tingling

> HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHA IM ALREADY LAUGHING AT THE STUPID FROG

>> *for context he already fucked up once and we are 1 minute and 15 seconds into the episode

> she has a point though, C3PO does usually get into trouble

> oh boy, he sounds mad.... I’m getting a sinking feeling about this

> oh no

>> ah shit he’s gone and joined the separatists

> YOU DONT GET THE RIGHT TO CALL HER SWEET YOU TRAITOR

> I am much more entertained nonetheless by this episode

> wait so they fart insults???? it sounds like a fart and i giggled a little

> Oh and now jar jar’s trying to talk to them

> HAHAHAHAH C3 always gets shit thrown at him or shot at, whenever he’s in an episode I get a little bit happy 

> HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH ITS A FUCKING MAGNET OH C3 YOU POOR DROID

> why does he automatically jump to jar jar’s been killed oh my god so little faith like its a swamp planet???? and jar jar comes from a swamp planet????? of course he gone survive falling into water????

> buta mesa sav-ed you? i love this stupid creature oh my god hahahahaha

> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THE JEDI CLOAK OMG

>> definitely 100% anakins, and I love the Padme has the equivalent of one of his hoodies

>>> I want one too

> ooooohhhh this is not going to go well

> oh boy

> I’m guessing this is where the bombad jedi comes from?

> DARTH JAR JAR

>> I am so sorry no its not mine, but I have no idea who’s it is

> wheresa jedi? OH MESA JEDI?

> have you guys seen zootopia? specifically where they trigger a ‘howl’ with the wolves??? Thats what I headcanon the droids are like with ‘roger roger’

> DAMN PADME THATS SOME MADASS CORE STRENGTH

>> crush me with those muscles please

> “There’s no jedi in here, wait there’s no prisoner in here!” hahahahahahahahah

> One day I’m going to have to do a little audio recording so you all know what sound I make whenever I’ve written hahahahahaha

> FUCK YEAH PADME SLAY THOSE DROIDS

> “I’m afraid the ship has been destroyed.” 

>> “Battle droids?” *shakes head*

>>> “... Jar Jar?”

>>>> “Jar Jar.”

> obviously Padme was right, she usually is

> oh boy Jar Jar is your only hope? you’re in for a shock buddy

> Padme is an excellent shot by the way

> OH MY GOD IT ATE HIM TO PROTECT HIM THATS SO SWEET

> “I think Jar Jar’s dead.” “Oh again?” goddamn it C3PO

> YEAH SLUG CREATURE THING GOOD JOB!

> ...

> excuse me????

> WHAT A FUCKING LEGEND HERE I WAS HATING ON UNCLE ANO WHEN HE IS STILL IN THE REPUBLIC

> okay he has my forgiveness now :))))))

alright, I enjoyed episode 8, 6 and 7 were a little lackluster, but I did like 8 a lot actually, more than I thought I would 

anyways, see you next time for 9, 10 and 11!! (I’m pretty sure I saw ventress and kit fisto in the title image, so be prepared for major ass thots because i am very heavily attracted to one (1) assassin and one (1) fish man)

[hundredsunny]

yoo can u tell us who your ocs are and their story??

YES I WOULD LOVE THIS SO MUCH THIS IS THE BEST ASK I HAVE EVER RECEIVED !!!! im only gonna talk about like 4 of them bc im v attached to these 4 okokokokokokok here we go this answer bouta be long as hell 

april - ok this girl is my first oc. i made her in the middle of english class in 6th grade and shes been around ever since!!! tbh at this point idk if i want her to still be a straw hat or not but like??? anyways shes a rogue princess. she grew up just fine, but then one day her asshat dad killed her mom bc her mom was an “embarrassment of a ruler” and made their kingdom “look bad” anyways that happened when april was like 11. then once her dad took TOTAL control of the island he locked her tf away so she wouldnt be able to visit the citizens like she used to. so from 11 to 18 she was cooped up in the damn castle. when she was 16 she got her hands on a devil fruit that was locked away in some hidden room in her mother’s library (cliche i know im sorry) so then she ATE IT. THE AURA-AURA FRUIT. a v basic summary of that fruit is that she can manipulate her own aura and shit. imagine lucario from pokemon as a human honestly. idk. so when she ate the fruit she decided to fight her dad but of course she lost horribly and then she had to sit around in even more of a cooped up state for two more years until the STRAW HAT TEAM CAME ALONG ON ACCIDENT BAM SHE WAS ABLE TO LEAVE THE ISLAND BC OF THEM ok ok??? her whole story is complicated i tried to give the best watered down version im sorry. anyways shes v sweet and can be goofy but can be defensive as hell. she knows what she wants and will do anything to get that. yeehaw. shes an average height for a woman, she’s got shoulder-length brown hair and sky blue eyes. if u ever wanna know more bout her hmu

jack - OK MY 2ND OC EVER HE WAS MADE RIGHT AFTER APRIL AND HONESTLY HES MY FUCKING BABY. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!! anyways. he grew up on the same island april did. his dad was like the right hand man to april’s dad so like he had connections and shit. he had a v happy family. a sweet mom celest and a dope dad cain and a wonderful lil sis sho. when aprils mom was still alive, they would always visit the town so jack and april always hung out and went on adventures throughout the town together. when april’s mom died and her dad started locking her up more, they werent able to see each other much anymore. of course, jack being the rebellious son of a gun he was, he would always sneak around and find ways to still hang with her. jack’s 3 years older than her btw. anyways. one day out of NOWHERE jack’s dad just VANISHED from the island and it rly fucked him up. he was 14 when that happened. so then he had to take a step up and watch over his mom and sister. then april’s dad became even more of an asshat and more people started leaving the island, so jack’s mom and sis decided to leave. HOWEVER jack decided to stay so april wouldn’t be completely alone. that happened when he was 16. then he stayed on the down low and visited april as much as possible until he finally decided to leave and make a life for himself and also search for his family. he left when he was 18 and he promised april that shed be set free one day and theyd be able to meet up once again and have more adventures :’) anyways then he went on a search for his dad. turns out his dad left bc he was the leader of the LEAGUE OF ASSASSINS and had to tend to the duties over there. after YEARS jack finally found the LOA but his dad literally left AGAIN 3 months before he got there. that frustrated him. but then he decided to start a life in the league ((bc his dad lowkey taught him a whole lotta shit about that as a child but u kno)) and met CHAZ AND JO…anyways pause on the story. jack’s an uncooked piece of spaghetti. hes v tall and lanky. hes got messy black hair and red eyes. he deserves so much love ok. he needs a hug. covers up his problems with dumb humor. a little shit. v snarky. his weakness is overthinking. v good with daggers. his epithet after he becomes a wanted man is (lame) jack “the slicer” solo ok. hes 23 after the timeskip. yes. i could talk about him forever. pls lemme know if u wanna know more about him AHHHHHHHH ps april and jack are my favorite brotp and i wish someone was the jack to my april 

chaz - oh charles. dont call him charles he’ll kill a bitch. idk what it is about me and having my oc’s be of higher class but like chaz came from a family of nobles and Fucking Hated It (big shocker huh) so long story short he RAN away and started a life as a pirate but he was betrayed Too Many Times and ended up hating pirates. nerd. anyways. one day he ran into this guy named cain. jack’s dad. cain was like “yo u got somewhere to stay?” and chaz was like “lol no”. so then cain took chaz in and introduced him to the LEAGUE OF ASSASSINS and basically trained chaz for years and then VANISHED. chaz was SO FUCKING HURT!!!! but cain left him as the leader of the organization so chaz was also v shook. he got RLY defensive when jack stumbled along. he felt threatened that jack was gonna snatch his leader spot all bc he was cain’s son. tbh chaz was a dick to jack for a good bit of time. cain was the best kind of father figure chaz ever had and he just??? ah chaz also needs a hug. anyways eventually he and jack became nerd bros. they argue all the damn time. think of zoro and sanji but dumber. thats these two. chaz fights with whips (kinky) ((jk)) and hes a fuckin BEAST with them. run. they call him the dawn menace bc he mostly makes his move at that time of day. CHAZ THE DAWN MENACE. ok lame. but yea. hes 26 after the timeskip. hes a nerd. takes things seriously. easily stressed. chaz had a horrible event happen to him in the past so he lost one of his green eyes and (theres a whole other story about that where cain does a Good Thing but im tryna save time and space rn) his weakness is his right side bc he literally cannot see. hes a hothead sometimes. also a redhead. makes sense. hes got some good biceps tbh. strong dude. love him

jo - AYYY JOSEPHINE!!! her story isnt entirely developed tbh. she’s part of the league of assassins. literally the smartest damn person in the entire world. SO SMART. literally shes the reason why the league is still thriving. she knows everything about everyone. ALSO SHES SUCH AN INCREDIBLE SHARPSHOOTER. USOPP WHO? v v v v v good with guns. honestly. shes 25 after the time skip but honestly shes a mom to chaz and jack. always breaking up their dumb arguments. so kind. can be snarky. purple eyes and long blue hair that she wears in low pigtails all the time. she was around when chaz first joined the league so they’ve been good buds for a hot minute. she’s 2nd in command now!!!!! she needs a break so bad. oh my god. works so damn hard. i honestly feel like im forgetting a lot of things about her im sorry im rushing rn but!!!!! honestly jack chaz and jo are my fave dream team. they’re all fucking nerds. i love them. tbh on the sims 4 i made a household with the three of them in it and it was wild. 

codie - lil cordelia. redhead. amber eyes. V STUBBORN. serious as shit. will kill someone. she has a zoan fruit and the model is an albatross so since shes a redhead she just fuckin. turns into a red albatross. they call her the red feather bc 1) literally red and 2) the blood of her enemies sometimes stain her feathers. ooooo spooky. her story is fuckin insane. all im gonna tell u is that she’s just with the whitebeard pirates. 20 after the timeskip. sassiest gal i know. fuckin constantly flamed ace even though ace was the flame guy. bird bros with marco!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!! anyways. thats all i got rn im sorry!!!! thank u for asking and please feel free to ask me more questions if u ever wanna know about some of these kids o mine!!!!! 

[btsxlami]

📢LISTEN 📢 UP📢 ARMYS📢 HERE ARE 23 UNDERRATED ¿!MORE!¿ RAP MONSTER TRACKS THAT YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY TOTALLY POSITIVELY SHOULD CHECK OUT by @btsxlami

Hey guys its your favourite Namjoon promoter here again a.k.a LAMI! My last post got a lot of notes so whoop whoop and included my personal favourite 23 Namjoon tracks which you can find here

Part 2 of my underrated Namjoon series.

Here are 23 more bc damn Namjoon has a lot of fcking songs!

Disclaimers: (HOLD UP IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST TIME SEEING THIS I SUGGEST YOU SEE PART ONE)

1. i will include tracks that Namjoon covered

2. I will include tracks that Namjoon featured in

3. I will include tracks that I personally feel the need to be well known *so no I won’t put expensive girl even tho thats my shit*

4. This list will be a bit more laid back since I covered a lot of the most important songs in the last list sooo

5. since i covered his best and most “important” tracks in the last list theres not many left but ill probably include his REALLY early like pre debut fetus tracks with his underground rapper friends, tbh I personally don’t think they are the best but you can definitely see how he grew and where he started from

6. enjoY! and reblog kekeke

7. THIS IS A LONG ASS LIST AND I FUCKING ANALYZED EACH SONG SO I EXPECT YALL TO READ AND APPRECIATE NAMJOON GODDAMIT

8. you can always go to BTS’s official soundcloud for unofficial official tracks yeet

9. titles with stars are ones i recommend ( i should of done this for part one yikes)

1. Voices by Rap Monster ⭐

from his first 2015 mixtape RM > Check out the full album here >>  X  *you can refer to more mixtape songs in my previous list

I feel as if this song is the closest a fan can get with Kim Namjoon. Just listening to it you feel a bit relaxed and almost a bit sad when you start listening to the first half of the song. This song reflects a person’s tender emotions and voices that run inside of someone’s head when they are confused. I remember listening to this 2 years ago and towards the end Namjoon starts screaming out all his pain and I started crying. C R Y I N G

Namjoon had a really smooth life up until he started pursuing hip hop. He was a beyond smart student and had a happy family so why the hell would he be depressed? He had his whole life ahead of him right?

But this lyrics totally breaks that facade down

 “ I didn’t have any dreams just like my lyrics, every day in that way the functions and equations that couldn’t give me an answer in the end those things became uncountable injuries “

Despite having such amazing grades Namjoon did not know what the hell he wanted to do with his life, he didnt want to go into something academic despite being good at it, he was lost in life and his academics could not make him happy but instead hurt him even more.

“ thought I could catch the mirage known as happiness but the me in front of my desk wasn’t happy even for a moment without my mom knowing, I put a sheet of white paper between the pages of my workbook “

This verse totally broke me apart. He wanted to be happy while being in school but school sure as hell did not make him happy. His parents looked up to him as some smartass freak but without them knowing he started writing his own lyrics to cope with his hardships.

“my identity that I wrote down matched to the drum and bass a different, relaxed feeling compared to when I got my report card even when I was #1 my heart couldn’t relax”

The music brought out his true inner feelings, music brought out his true personality rather than when he was almost robot like studying with no self-identity. Despite being number one in class he still felt an emptiness that only music could fill.

“even as 7 years passed... still making my mixtape by myself in one corner of my room some say I’m fake, okay, I admit it, my dark past I can justify it, but I won’t, so that kind of problem won’t happen again the pedal that I stepped on for 7 years has finally been oiled “

Namjoon has been writing music and tried to get recognition for 7 years, despite Bangtan getting fame he is still lonely writing his own mixtape in a dark corner, kind of pathetic ehh idk, in his mixtape interview his dark past was his problematic sayings and actions. He felt the need to appropriate culture in order to rap. He then figured out that music and culture had nothing to do with eachother, music is for everyone. *I’m fake*

And finally after all the hardships after 7 years he is finally started to receive praise and attention!

2. WE ARE BULLETPROOF PT.1 by: Rap Monster, Supreme Boi, and Iron ⭐

Composed 6-7 years ago when Namjoonie was about 15 or 16 THIS SONG IS FUCKING BOP. 

2 of Bangtans were also first members are featured here: Supreme boi (yall probably familiar with him) and Iron! (i hope iron never affiliates with Bangtan ever again tho we dont need a criminal around them yikes)

3. Hook by Supreme Boi, Iron, and Namjoon (also the track used in Yoongi’s all i do is win)

Extremely old and pre debut, but old is gold

Probably one of Namjoon’s only ‘diss’ song, he usually doesnt diss others while he raps tbvh

4. Seventeen by Rap monster

I FEEL LIKE I SHOULDNT MAKE FUN OF HIM BC 15 YEAR OLD NAMJOON AT THE TIME WAS PROBABLY REALLY PROUD BACK THEN BUT HE LOOKED SO FUCKING FUNNY BC DAMN THAT HAIR AND HIS VOICE SOUNDS LIKE A CHIPMUNK BUTHUSDHUFUFSUD

5. SKOOL OF TEARS By: Rap Monster, Suga, and Jin ⭐

Absoloute MASTERPIECE! FIRST OF ALL THE ORIGINAL TRACK IS FROM SWIMMING POOLS BY KENDRICK LAMAR AND I LOVE KENDRICK! SECOND, THE RAP FLOW SOUNDS AMAZING NAMJOON IS GOING SO HARD AND DAMN YOONGI BACK AT IT AGAIN! ALSO CREDS FOR BABY BOY JIN FOR SOUNDING SO BADASS HERE BUT HERE IS WHY I LOVE THIS SONG!

I think its absolutely amazing how Namjoon especially writes song towards youth suffering in school, it takes a lot of guts to write against a society that has been around for decades. 

“  This is a ring called a classroom This is a stadium with no referee only an audience You know there will never be a victor everyone will lose There will be no victor everyone will lose”

“ That’s right, in the end school is like another mini society A jungle made carelessly by adults They made the weaklings weak, they made the strong powerful Of course since they were strong they made the weak suffer A society built on the teachings that friends are only for pretend The morals of adults made us step on the weak to rise to the top “

Its clear to see that Namjoon has suffered in school but also isnt afraid to address the truth.

6. Expensive girl by Rap Monster 

( I FUCKING DISCOVERED THIS SONG WHEN I WAS LIKE 11-12 AND I NEVER WANTED TO PUT THIS HEAR BUT YALL LIKE FOUGHT ME TO ADD THIS TO THE LIST GODDAMIT I HATE YALL I GOT LIKE HATE MAN OKAY)

“Take it off now girl just take it off (I’m a master, baby with your bra)Take it off now girl just take it off (I can help you slide those panties off)(..I’m a beat that pussy like you never ever felt before)x2″

7. Converse High (original version SUNG by Rap Monster)⭐

Yall probably heard Bangtan’s Converse High but here was the original version written by Namjoon that was rejected bc of the swearing omg damn joonie, BUT HE SINGS SO BEAUTIFUL IN THIS YESS

(funny story in seventh grade when this came out it was the last day of school and i requested my teacher to stay after school late so i could finish listening to the whole thing)

8. Suicide by Rap Monster

Rapmon wrote this mixtape in the point of view of a baby in his mother’s tummy. The baby’s parents are high school kids who are forced to go through abortion.

*this song was deleted bc of copyright and also the source of it is unknown but hey ITS IN ENGLISH AND DAMN NAMJOON RIGHTS DEEP SHIT*

(tf is namjoon doing u good)

9. What am I to you by Rap Monster from the 2014 Dark & wILD ⭐

if you DONT KNOW THIS SONG I SUGGEST YOU RETHINK YOUR LIFE DECISIONS BC LOWKEY HANDS DOWN ONE OF THE BEST INTRO’S TO A OFFICIAL BTS ALBUM (gif is from the live ver of this song and he started crying ok)

So Namjoon used to have a girlfriend who “mistreated” him. Tbvh we really don’t know what happened but on problematic men he said it wasnt anything serious it was just she would neglect him and not spend enough time but also hang out with other men.

(gif aint mine so gif blogs dont come at me)

But clearly the lyrics of this song are very emotional but the real reason why this song is a masterpiece is because of the rise of  emotions.

It starts off slow and cute, Namjoon mentions how he loves the girl and how their love is pure and innocent, throwing cute love phrases and the song sounds so soft, hopeful, and romantic. But in the middle the music starts to get more serious and Namjoon starts to question the relationship. He feels as if the girl thinks of this relationship as more of a task and a job, and slowly as the song comes to an end NAMJOON STARTS FUCKING SCREAMING AND BELTING! ALL THE EMOTIONS BUILD UP AND HE STARTS SCREAMING “WHAT AM I TO YOU GIRL WHAT AM I TO YOU I DO LOVE YOU CRAZY UH DO YOU” LIKE IT WAS SCARY I WAS CRYING IM LIKE NAMJOON WHO TF HURT YOU

10. Always by Rap Monster ⭐

This song is more recent and farely well known but I still felt the need to put this masterpiece here. Namjoon said not to worry about him as the lyrics are really sad and almost ???SUICIDAL??? but he said he wrote this when he was stressed last year. Its kind of a self questioning song about life and your purpose. I cried when it came out. well i always cry when i listen to namjoon is it a surprise.

I'm honestly in tears because this song goes to show how hurt Namjoon still is even after all these years. Even after all these awards, fans, and accomplishments. Depression still hurts after a long time. I can tell that this song was talking about his past. This song literally made me realize Namjoon was questioning his existence and I wanna hold him so badly. Guys...we could of lost Kim Namjoon. My absolute favourite human being in the entire world who saved my life. He is a human being who does not deserve such pain but I am so proud he endured it so well and look how far he came. One of my favourite verses "I live for the sake of understanding this world, but why hasnt the world tried to understand me atleast once" Its a really vague phrase which is why I like it. WORLD could mean destiny, fate, life, even parents.  He tries so hard to accept his life, to understand his parents wishes, sacrificing his own happiness yet fate decides to only give him the worst. "Dad please listen to me" "dead dad, your dead to me," Talking about how his dad wouldn't let him rap. I remember him mentioning that his dad once told him all that education he worked hard for was for nothing and I can’t imagine how sad Namjoon felt in that moment. "I would tell god if I ever meet him, i would hold him by the collar and tell him this life is like a coffee I never ordered" A pretty sad and a bit confusing verse, maybe leading to why Namjoon eventually became an atheist. Namjoon was in so much pain he didnt want to be born. "I wished I was dead...... I wished “Someone would kill me" No Namjoon never utter such words. My joonie mini I hope you are better and hopeful now, look at how far you came, your so successful and loved, and you made your family proud. Dont ever doubt yourself and even think about death, just keep living happily and moving forward. He honestly felt lost in this point of his life and still continues to feel lost. Namjoon you have such in important role and your existence was destined. You were born for a reason. You were born to change lives. 

11.  J-Lim ft. Rap Monster & Iron - Ashes

12. TIPSY BY RAP MONSTER & SUPREME BOI

Namjoon wrote this in the beginning of his rap career when he was still trying to find where he stood as a rapper. He mentions how he isnt doing this for the fame or money and he isnt the next Nas or Tupac he just wants to rap for the love of it.

13.  Rap Monster of 방탄소년단 (BANGTAN),Supreme Boi,i11evn,Marvel.J - You can't do that

*i suggest you skip ahead to 1:30 for namjoon fire verse, shade intended*

14.  RAP MONSTER of 방탄소년단,Suprema,Marvel.J,Kyum2 - Rollin

I also recommend you to skip ahead to 2:40 BC DAMN BOY GOES HARD

But tbvh pre debut namjoon squad (supreme boi , young jeezy, iron are hella problematic and say the n word in this and still do so im like yikes im happy nam left you) “ They pissed, now rape me" bitch whet

yeah im just here for namjoons verse bye

imma mufukin balla on this mufuckin beat spit mufuckin rap on this mufuckin shit got mufuckin skill so im mufuckin phat its mufuckin trick and a mufuckin track i i bet you betta stop stopin da chatter im a rapper man, and i represent BPB im juss so greater than hoes

15. FUCK COCKROACHES BY RAP MONSTER AND ZICO *THIS IS SO FUNNY*

Zico was 15 and RapMon was 13 when they rapped this, Namjoon sounds like a chipmunk BUT ZICO SOUNDS LIKE JIMIN I STG!

16. Rap Monster- Thinking Bout you

Joonie Mini Representing Biggie smalls eyyy!

17. Glory By Rap Monster

"I'm a dick? Yeah, when you disturb me, I grow bigger" SO FUCKING DONE

*there was lowkey lowkey controversy bc he said he tore 4 hymens BUT DETECTIVE LAMI FIXED IT*

 In the beginning Namjoon says that people looked at him pitifully because he joined BTS,  the Underground rappers were disappointed with him which led the Underground rappers to leave him, which has ripped his hymen. Not 4 hymen of random girls. 4 and "I" sound the same in Korean

it's a bit weird but in this case he is talking about himself all the hate people showed has ripped his hymen symbolizing his innocence for music.

18. NAA BY RAP MONSTER

tHE ORIGINAL BEAT WAS DEUCES BY CHRIS BROWN I WAS DYING

19. REGULAR VOICE BY RAP MONSTER ⭐

A really sweet and open-minded song about Namjoon wanting a “regular girl” “Height? I don’t care. Age? I don’t mind it. When you say, “I’ll only look at you” then I’m okay. Whether your skin is light or dark it doesn’t really matter, our love is deeper than that. “

I feel as if idols are pressured to have certain ideal types and say them out in the open, Namjoon had bad influences around him *underground rappers* which also influenced his negative sayings towards certain things but he wrote this song all alone at a young age which shows that his intentions are pure, and ever since he apologized for his wrong doings you go joon.

his voice sounds like sex

20. DREAMING BY RAP MONSTER

FETUS CHUBBY WTF HAIR NAMJOON IS BACK

okay but seriously you can see that despite being young he put a lot of effort and thought into this song!

21.  RAP MONSTER of 방탄소년단 feat.김거덕 - RAP

22.  130305??  THIS TRACK IS UNTITLED BUT IT SOUNDS SO EPIC TF

23. Trouble by Rap Monster 🔞 🔞

OKAY IM BARELY AROUSED BUT THIS SHIT ACTUALLY HAD ME SOAKED IM SORRY GOD LIKE ITS SO SUGGESTIVE I STG 

HIS SEXUAL FANTASIES I STG

[alxxkim]

December 2

I’m currently listening to Overwhelming while eating candy corn Jin got me for my bday (so its been a month and yet) and I feel like I have a lot to say that I don’t have someone to tell to all in one sitting so here it goes. A few weeks ago I decided to stay at Biola for the spring but now I am having second thoughts. I am WAY happier at school away from my family/house and the thought of living at home 24/7 aka how summer was aka hell makes me actually want to kill myself. I really hope that there’s a chance Karina and I both go to Fullerton so we can have a place together.  It sounds so fantastical but also just imagining how amazing my life would be is just all I am looking forward to. I think that I am going to end up enrolling late and not get any classes I want because people have already signed up for classes and most are full lo l but yeah. I am suffering from writer’s block. I tried writing tonight and I actually started crying as I was singing but it just didn’t feel right. I really want to write songs that I can 100% sing-cry to and make it feel so right. I just haven’t found it yet.I wonder how Jon Bellion wrote these songs haha. His lyrics are just so fucking wholesome and relevant to so many aspects of my life. Listening to him tho makes me feel so fucking confused cause the first time I saw him, I was “happy” and brown haired and dating John and the last time I saw him in September I was black haired, single, and broken. I still am those three things. Work has taken over my life again.  I am scheduled Friday-Sunday for the next 2 weeks and as $$ as that made me think I was be, honestly it just doesn’t feel worth it right now. Granted, when I get paid, I will probably feel otherwise.  I’ve been telling myself and others that I am okay with things with John. I honestly can’t fucking tell what I am.  I obviously miss him. I am doing fine without him, I will keep doing fine without him, but I miss having that person. I guess it’s slowly transitioning to the point where you miss the feelings and not the actual person. But just typing that made me realize how false that is. I miss John a lot. He was so funny and caring and loved me so much. I honestly think I can now realize that he loved me just as much as I loved him. And I loved him so fucking much. Just being next to him made everything okay.  The night my mom found an empty cartridge in my room and messaged me about it asking and I thought I was done for, and all I did was just cry, John was just there and as terrified as I was, I was okay because of him.  I think its because its December and the holidays are coming and last winter was probably one of the best parts of my life so far. My 6 week winter break was full of shabu, Fiona, my new polaroid, and just freedom. I was so happy I had Sen Nick and Tyler. I was so happy I had my friends at home. Everything was just so nice. And I had the plan to go to slo with Faith before break ended, and it was just so nice. I miss that feeling of being so excited to see John again. As hard and fucking unfair the distance was being with him obviously made it worth it.  I wish I realized how unhappy John was.  But there’s nothing I could’ve done.  And I need to accept that so that I can stop hating myself for not being better.  Maybe I need to take the next semester off.  Maybe I just need to find new things I could enjoy. I don’t think I want to go to Disneyland next week with my family. My sister isn’t talking to me again. I feel like the family is broken again but its just with me. I’m slowly turning back into the person I was during the summer. There are so many people in my past that I want to rekindle things with and just fucking get a meal to catch up, but I can never do that. I don’t want to talk about John I don’t want to talk about how unhappy and depressed I am.  But I am so tired of pretending like everything is okay. I feel like deleting all social media again. Looking on insta after shifts is just shit because I just feel this urge to fucking post but i have nothing to post because I spent my night inside working. Last night was really fun though. I got off work at around 11 I think and came home and showered and was just going to be on my phone for hours till I was okay enough to sleep. I knew Shin wanted to fuck haha but I told him that I felt like shit so he called me and asked what was up and why I’m depressed.  He actually listened even though I was barely telling him everything because then he would probably think I’m insane if he doesn’t already but yeah he told me to just focus on things I love and that it really helps. It’s so admirable how much he loves working out and playing basketball. But yeah we talked for nearly an hour until he decided to get me and I came outside when he said he was here and as I walked out i noticed he was outside walking to me and he gave me a hug and we drove behind Target and sat there for maybe like 30 min just talking and listening to jbel and the script LOL HE SANG THIS ONE SONG SO FUCKING LOUD he said hes never sung that loudly in front of anyone before hahaha i wish i knew what song it was but i will cause he plays it daily. i just hate asking so im gonna have to snake a peek at his phone the next time it plays. my toes were rlly cold and so he started warming my right foot with his hands and blew air into them a lot haha it was so cute and he gave me a dank ass fucking foot massage holy shit. it hurt like a bitch but in the best way possible. my feet/ankles are always so fucked when i work. so it was especially dank. I also didn’t wear makeup and he said I look better without makeup haha i was like ooooooooooooooooooooook but rlly yeah i was happy he said that especially because I’ve been wearing makeup daily because I just hate myself without it. But that day I had a bare face and actually felt okay. He kissed me and he kept saying how he loves kissing me so much. Omg and we made out to jon b like im sorry but it was fucking amazing. ok we also fucked to him too HAHAHAHA  And then kevin told us to cruise outside cydni’s house cause him paul and esther were smoking so we went and as we pulled up, paul looked at us through his open window and we both laughed in the same explosive way HAHAHAHAH and they told us to shut the fuck up jk they just sushed us ahahahah omfg. it was just too gold. i really don’t want to ever smoke in front of shin again but yeah I couldn’t just say no to weed haha so we hit a piece which burned the shit out of my throat and I was pretty faded I guess and shin kept coughing cause we werent hotboxing the car but it was still potent and i felt bad :( and he was like IS SECONDHAND FADED A THING hahahaha and esther had her juul so i hit that and then we left the car to smoke and i smoked a stoog. oh yeah so immediately after we got out of the car to walk to their car in the beginning, we were just standing outside their car as they were sitting inside and shin like immediately took off his jacket (the warm flannel we got at pacsun whom he loves) and gave it to me even tho he was wearing a tshirt and shorts ugh. i took it off before smoking cause i didn’t want it to  smell so he put it back on and he was like “you can wear it once youre done smoking” haha. and he offered to give it back on the way back to his car but i said i was ok. then on the drive to my house i stuck my body out the window to vent out the smell LOL and it was cold as fuck but felt cool esp with shin’s crazy ass driving hahahahah and i was like i wish you had a sunroof and he was like “yeah thats my bad” and i was like NO BITCH IM NOT TRYING TO COMPLAIN ITS NOT UR BAD I MJSUT SAYING lol and shin has told me how much he hates smoking and the extent of it and how its so unattractive to kiss someone whos smoked so im like welp but as i was getting out of the car he was like yeah fuck u u smell i aint kissing you and i made a pout as i was getting out and he was like no wait and he kissed my cheek hehe. and before that he asked if i was feeling better and i said yes and thanked him and he said yeah of course anytime in a tone like ofc bitch. haha i love when he kisses my head T^T but yeah i came home around 4:40 or however long it took to get to my house and I was happy and hickey’d up and i was just so happy we ended up doing that. 

i slept right before 7am and woke up like 11 so yeah i barely slept which is probably why i felt so off today. but i just stayed in bed till my hair cut which was at 2 and kathy was so shocked to see i cut my bangs LOL going on and on about how i never wanted bangs and then i do it and i WISH I DID NOT TRIM THEM LAST WEEK CAUSE THEYRE SO SHORT NOW CAUSE THEY WERE SO UNEVEN AND I LOWKEY HATE MY HAIR AND I WISH I DIDNT GET IT CUT SHORT UGH I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE but im gonna work with it and we’ll see.  I wanna change my hair color again but idk what to change it to.  Then i went to emily’s and we picked up at unity and smoked and caught up and she was doing her interior design homework and i had to leave cause of work which sucked cause i just wanted to actually hang out but i covered shin’s shift today cause he spent all day studying so im glad i got to help him out and if it were anyone else’s shift i would’ve hated myself lol. but he didn’t call me until like 1 or something but i knew he would call eventually and he said he wanted to finish his work early so we could’ve hung out but he has way too much and so we just talked but i could barely talk cause my bitchass sister always fucking goes off about how inconsiderate i am so yeah lmao but yeah and i told him i got off work early to which he said he knew cause i got home around 11 and i ate and he calculated it and theres no way i couldve eaten after getting off at 10:30 and got home HAHAH like he cared enough to think about that.... and then i told him i have work tomorrow 11:30-5 and he said then maybe he’ll come bring me boba 

i dont expect him to but maybe he will im so fucking over work

i cant believe its already sunday tomorrow and i have to go back to school for chapel i think.  fucking kill me. i just want to have free time

[mmmelanie-blog1]

greetings loved ones ! i love snoop dogg deal with it ! im benzo im literal trash thanks for checking in lmao im so excited for this u have no fkn idea boo ( feel free 2 msg me or like this post if ur too lazy n i will contact u once i get back home ) i love twd and alanna masterson a lot ( ok twd is becoming a lil bad but ima still watch it tho ) so this is a huge deal for me to play her n also my first time so dont ride my dick like this if theres something wrong with her or smth pls bare w me ! under the read more u will find a bit more about my babe MELANIE MILLER and about the connections and stuff keep in mind that im still trying to figure her out and all that stuff so have fun !

mel has lived all of her life in hermosa beach, she was born and raised there and loves it and would never ever leave it here she’s shocked and upset her parents decided to move out of there which takes us to her current living status: she lived with her parents until she turned 21, she rented an apartment and has been living on her own ever since. her father was the local owner of THE BAR ( ya the bar its called THE BAR dont make a big deal outta it have u not seen gone girl? jeez ) and when they moved out of hermosa to travel around the world with all the bar’s funding they left mel in charge of it and its been a crazy ride for her bc she literally knew nothing about how to manage a bar but now she does and shes an ace !

SHES THE YOUNGER DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL, she has three brothers ( canon masterson boys bc i love them ALL esp jordan ) who eventually come visit her n she loves them with all her damn heart ! her family means the most to her and shes always happy to have them around like u have no idea how much ! she also has a little niece ( i didnt wanted mel to have a child but I CANT CUT OFF ALL THE CUTE MARLOWE PICS SO ) who means absolutely everything to her ! she loves kids bc she considers herself a child at heart mmmm

her label is the BENEVOLENT meaning she’s really caring and soft and sweet. picture jess day from new girl minus all the glitter and girly things. mel is kind of a tomboy who wouldnt mind to wear dresses on special occasions ! lmao she’s super funny but will always bring the dad jokes to the table but lbr who doesnt love a dad joke lmao shes rly weird but in that sweet nice way you know ?

she was born in a very religious family and she always did what her parents wanted to so now that she’s all on her own she’s like free and ready to be wild but she’s like am i really ready for this ? am i as wild as everyone else seem to be ? she’s very responsible she was RAISED that way and she can’t help it ofc sometimes she’s like you know what i dont care im going to do it.... will i regret it? probably but i dont care !

mel is ALL AGAINST conflict shes the one to talk her way through things and be as civil as possible unless you wanna get wild she will probably walk the heck away from u and be like “not gonna have it, my dude !” you know? she loves attention but she never shows, shes kinda insecure about her looks in general and she pulls it off in a funny way like im gonna drag myself before u do so dont bother.... she is very sensitive but its going to take you a little bit harder than “u look bad” to make her feel bad you know.... she will probably cry later when no ones around but shes not going to let you know !

shes so aesthetic she loves art, painting, music, museums, the stars, the moon and everything else ... she believes 100% in alien and supports the theory that THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE she lowkey scully and mulders child lmaooo

she got a major in psychology so listening to people and comforting them is the thing she loves the most ! she lives for the present, dont talk to her about her past or ask her about the future that kinda annoys her although shes soft hearted and all she likes being straight up with almost everyone ! if you wanna die lie to her um she aint gonna kill u u idiot but she gonna cut u right tf off without hesitation !

PISCES SUN / GEMINI MOON / ARIES RISING !

shes an emotional wreck, she literally has no luck at all with love shes a fucking mess she falls for the wrong person EVERY FREAKING TIME ( i can relate ) she covers her emotions ( when talking about love and relationships ) with indifference and humor most of the time she be like “i dont rly need someone to constantly be there for me men aint shit” but she be crying in her sleep for someone to cuddle her every night lmao thats the way she is man u gotta love her

WANTED CONNECTIONS

SO BASICALLY i love new girl a lot and i love it specially bc it gives u so many ideas for connections and stuff lmao if u want some inspo check a new girl blog and we will get a connection from it lol but yeah my most wanted connections as of right now are:

friends to lovers: they are RIDES OR DIES basically, it doesnt have to be like uh they known each other forever nah its alright if they just met like a year ago anyway they p much together all the time and one of them ( either ur muse or mel idc ) start to feel things for the other and its annoying bc they dont wanna ruin this thing at all .... plot twist ? if u like to watch ur characters suffer, like ME ! maybe this thing is a ONE SIDED THING like one has feelings and the other is like lmao yikes ! so everything slowly becomes awkward ! i dont rly know i dont mind how this actually turns out tbh as long as we have it !

bestfriends: ALMOST SIBLINGS they have known each other for literally YEARS they went to school, high school and maybe college together ! p much melanie is the mother and ur muse is the reckless teenager whos always asking for help but they love each other a lot ! think about cece/jess from new girl :)

roomies ( 0 / 3 ): they all different from one another its a miracle they all get along this well ! they are a huge fucking mess but they are there for each other all the time ! they all live in a loft or a house idk we could figure that out laters ! ( tba )

exes: well okay as explained before, mel is a huge mess when it comes to love ! this could go two ways, they ended on bad terms but try to be as civil maybe ? melanie is a caring loving bitch but when shes in a relationship her insecurities take over most of the times and thats why it messes everything up and MAYBE thats one of the reasons why they broke up ? idk man we can work something out.... OR THEY ENDED ON REALLY NICE GOOD TERMS and still care for each other and its like they are there for each other but its kinda awkward bc do we still love each other like that or are we like family now ? you know ? I DONT MIND MELANIE HAVING LIKE TWO EXES SO LMAO

sugar daddy: is she into that daddy kink ? whO KNOWS ! but lately shes been drooling over u and its kinda nice but shes afraid bc this will probably end up really bad but shes still willing to take one for the team !

big little lies ( 0 / 5 ): MY FAVORITE SHOW so im thinking a group of FIVE to SIX powerful women ( who havent killed anyone yet so chill ) who are there for each other and have wine nights and sit by the fire to talk about their days and stuff like that so yeah that would be so cute ! ( tba )

conspiracy theories buddy: they dont just talk about conspiracy theories but they do lmao also “did u heard about the haunted house up in the hills? wanna go?” they vibe Hard its 4 am n they texting about aliens the universe and sutff like that ! ( tba )

ok thats p much all i can think of ! if there any other connection u wanna have dont hesitate to let me know ! i love sharing ideas and crying over headcanons so its fine by me ! also im running late to work so if u wanna plot hmu and like this thing and ill make sure to reply to all ur msgs once i get back home !