#as usual I’m going to rewatch this several times as I have so many thoughts about both couples lol

[scrumptiousstuffs]

Kant may still think he is in it just to fulfill his duties for Captain Christ but the crack is starting to show and it’s delicious to see.

From him slipping up to calling Fadel “Brother in law” (also GMMTV, WHY will you just translate it as brother?)

To him worried for Bison (and not James) even as he is worried that the former will hurt the latter (to the point he asked for Fadel’s help and even got Style to persuade Fadel on behalf of him)

Plus Style pointed comment on how both of them are really far gone for both brothers

And the way he keeps having to have mental check everytime he starts to enjoy his time with Bison - be it when they exchange the flirty text messages with the help of Nong Kitty to the Arcade and Bowling alley scenes

Followed by the sensual, soft scene of the boys in Kant’s bedroom as Bison essentially worships Kant’s body (this was such a good scene - cause I think that this was really the first scene we see Bison really yielding to someone else)

- as a side note, Fadel and Bison, my lovely assassins - DO NOT TRUST that adopted mother of yours 😭😭😭😭😭😭, please 🙏

- and this goes for Captain Christ too! Kant - that man can’t be trusted! Run 🏃 as far as you can get! (I know he can’t but a girl can dream yeah?)

The Heart Killers EP 5

[lizard-on-a-window-pane]

so, i started writing this fic, and i think i'm going to continue it, but i would love to get some reactions to the idea i had so much fun adapting a romcom to the marauders in my 10 things i hate about you fic, then i was rewatching life as we know it for the first time in years and was surprisingly still into it and thought it could be a fun one cos of some of the parallels, so here is the set up:

in an au where voldy is destroyed, sirius never sent to azkaban, and reader and sirius have to raise harry together after james and lily die even though they hate each other... initially ofc

pairing: Sirius Black x reader word count: 1.9k

You’re surprised to hear a knock at your door this late. Exhausted after another Order mission, you resent whoever is on the other side of it. When you open it, lowering your ready wand just behind the door with an exasperated sigh, the feeling heightens. 

“What the hell do you want?” you ask a smirking Sirius Black leaning on your doorframe. 

“What kind of a greeting is that, love?” he retorts seemingly unfazed.

You say nothing, glare harder. 

He rolls his eyes and begins, “Dumbledore wants you to tell me about your mission. He has something he wants me to do soon — won’t tell me what exactly yet, you know how he is — and he thinks whatever intel your mission provided will be relevant.” 

“Can’t it wait till tomorrow? I’m exhausted, Black.” 

“He told me to come tonight,” he says firmly, shrugging. “Look, I don’t want to be here any more than you want me to be here, but there are more important things right now than resting” — he gestures to you — “or keeping good company,” he finishes, gesturing at himself.

“Oh I’m bad company? Have you met yourself? And you’re one to talk about important things, Black. All you ever do is joke around. And —” you go to continue, but he cuts you off, gently pushing his way past you and into your flat.

“Choose a line of attack, L/N. You’re rambling.”

You groan but follow him into your living room. He’s making himself comfortable, putting his boots up on your coffee table to settle in. 

“Fucking hell, Black,” you whine as you kick his legs off. “I know there’s a war going on, but I’d prefer for my home not to become a pig sty, thank you.” 

“Leave it to you to worry about shit like this now,” he sighs, rolling his eyes at you for the second time in mere minutes.

His critical comments are nothing new. The two of you had gotten into it over nothing since your school days, your best friends eventually getting together doing nothing to make you hate each other less. Lily had been your best friend since first year, James his. 

With your current exhaustion, even this little comment had you practically seething. Knowing him, though, you knew anything you said back would just give him more ammunition to mock you somehow. So, you just stood and stared angrily at him. 

“Well?” he looks at you infuriatingly nonchalantly. “The faster we do this, the faster I’m out of here.” 

“Fine.” You sit next to him begrudgingly and relate the events of the last few days to him, falling into “official” mode the only thing that made dealing with Sirius Black any easier.

~

This message wasn’t right. There was no possible way it was right. It had to be wrong. A mistake. A trap. A cruel joke. Anything but the truth.

You’re standing there, staring at the spot where a fellow Order member’s Patronus has just vanished after delivering its message to you. Your jaw is slack, your eyes wide and quickly brimming with tears. Tears at the mere idea that your best friend and her husband were dead, not the reality. It couldn’t be reality. 

After what might have been several minutes, though your mind is stuck, your body moves to action and heads immediately to Order headquarters. 

When you get there, you’re surprised at how many people are here. Such gatherings are usually reserved for the most important of meetings only; it’s too dangerous to have so many members together in any one place, lest the enemy find out and root out what little resistance remains. 

Oddly enough, it’s in crowds like this that you most notice the absent. You miss them when you are alone, too, of course, but there is something about looking around and not seeing Marlene’s beautiful — even if haunted toward the end — face amongst the others. Not feeling Dorcas’s head coming to rest on your shoulder. Not hearing Alice’s sweet giggle at something Frank has just whispered to her, bringing joy even in the darkest of times. Their voices are devoid of joy now, shut away at St. Mungo’s. 

Lily can’t be gone too. Please not Lily too. 

You’re not sure how to gauge the expressions of your friends and comrades around you. There is such a strange intermingling of emotions lingering on their faces. James and Lily couldn’t be dead if there was a look of such relief on Emmeline’s face, if Elphias was busy chattering away to a few other members. 

But then you see him. You see Sirius Black, and you know.

He’s sitting in a corner. He isn’t crying. He doesn’t look sad. He looks hollow. There aren’t tears in his eyes because his eyes are dead. 

You gravitate toward him without thinking, and when you’re close, his empty eyes meet yours. Sirius stands. You look at each other for a long moment, understanding crossing between you, and without a word from either of you, you embrace.

A few long, shaky breaths later, with Sirius Black’s warm, firm arms around you, you break down. You can’t see his face from where you have yours burrowed into his chest, but his arms tighten around you as your sobs shake your whole body. He holds you through the entire episode, until your body has drained itself of all the tears it could possibly produce in this moment. Only when you’ve been still for a minute does he loosen his grip, stepping back slightly.

You already know the answer, but you ask anyway, “Both of them?” He just nods. You immediately follow with, “Where’s Harry?” Fear shoots through you at the thought, but before you lose yourself in it, Sirius grabs your shoulders and says, “Harry’s fine.” Another bout of fear oozes through your body, but this one is slower, eerier. It takes you a moment to discern its cause: it’s Sirius’s voice. It’s never sounded like this before, and you hear in its dullness a pain you’d think unimaginable if you weren’t feeling it too. 

You nod slowly and ask where your godson is. Sirius tells you he’s with Remus. 

“What’s going to happen to him?” you whisper. 

“I don’t know,” he responds. “Dumbledore said he’d talk to us once we were both here.” 

~ 

It’s much later in the night, almost morning you reckon, when you find yourself and Sirius sitting across from Dumbledore, finally alone. He’d had to handle a million and one things already, the scope of the night’s events incomprehensible to your grief-stricken mind. 

Dumbledore doesn’t wait at all before saying, “I am truly sorry for the loss you both have experienced tonight and will continue to experience for the rest of your lives. The loss of someone so close is a loss from which one never truly recovers.” 

You both nod, saying nothing, and he continues. 

“I’m certain both of your main concern at this point is Harry. Firstly, let me provide you the comfort of informing you Harry is perfectly safe. How exactly, none of us know, and perhaps will never know. But young Harry survived Voldemort’s attack tonight, and somehow destroyed him in the process. Harry is currently with Mr. Lupin, but you can sort for yourselves how you wish to go about the transition in the following days. I have not spoken to either of you about it personally, but I imagine, given the arrangement, that you will be moving into the Potter’s home in Godric’s Hollow?”

You’re sure your face betrays your utter confusion, and on instinct, you look to Sirius for some sort of clarification. The look on his face tells you he’s as lost as you are. 

“Arrangement, sir?” you finally manage after some awkward silence.

“Yes. It was Lily and James’s wish that in the event of their deaths, Harry should be raised by his godparents.” He looks between you and Sirius. “You, of course.” 

A pregnant beat. 

“I’m sorry, what? ‘You’ as in who? ‘You’ as in me? Or him? Not ‘you’ as in us?” you ramble. 

“‘You’ as in both of you, yes. You and Mr. Black.” You give a mirthless chuckle. 

“There must be some kind of misunderstanding, sir. We,” you gesture unnecessarily aggressively between you and the man sitting next to you, “are not together. We’re not a couple; we’re not even friends; how are we supposed to raise Harry together?” 

“There is no misunderstanding. And I do feel the need to add that this is in fact one consideration in bestowing — and accepting — the role of a godparent, I’m sure you know.”

You turn toward Sirius, who is just sitting there completely dumbstruck. You smack his chest and urge, “Say something, for Godric’s sake.” 

“Ummm… I… Well… I… She…She…,” he looks to you briefly, “I and… and she… I and she… she and I —” He can’t string even a phrase together, and Dumbledore gently raising a hand mercifully puts an immediate stop to his ridiculous attempt.

“It is unfortunate that your friends did not discuss this decision with you before its effect was rendered necessary. I imagine they dreaded such a conversation and suspect they never found it the ‘right’ time. However, I am certain it was what they wanted. After all, it was at my behest that they made a decision at all. Few of us ever want to think about our own deaths, but when I realized what danger the Potters were in, I knew it was a necessary consideration. I am devastated to have been proven correct.” Dumbledore was always calm and collected, but you know him well enough to know he meant those words.

“If you choose to reject this arrangement, we can see about other options. Though, as I have said, it would be going against his parents’ wishes. There is of course his aunt and uncle, the Dursleys I believe they are called. Alternatively, there are orphanages for such occasions, but they are dreadful places, and I would wish that fate upon no child, especially if he could be raised with family.” 

“The Dursleys aren’t his family,” you say immediately, a strength to your voice that had not been there in the entire conversation thus far. Dumbledore looks at you. “They’re not, sir. I’ve met them. They’re horrid people. They hate wizards and witches, were terribly cruel to Lily. I can’t imagine how they’d treat her wizard son.” You grimace at the thought. “They’re not his family… We are.” This sits heavily in the room for a moment, and it is Sirius who speaks first. 

“We’ll take care of Harry,” he whispers. His voice is quiet but certain. “We’ll figure it out.” He looks to you inquisitively, and you nod. 

“I’m gladdened to hear it,” Dumbledore says. “You don’t have to stay there long term, but I imagine it will be good for Harry to be in a familiar place as he adjusts to such change, so I will have him brought to his house in a few hours. Can you collect yourselves and meet him there?” 

You both nod; he adds a curt, “Good,” and before you know what’s even happened, you’re left sitting in a room with Sirius Black, a man you’d always hated, a man who is suddenly your co-parent to Harry. 

[mumms-the-word]

Yet another Veilguard update with the usual good, the bad, the ugly, and the me freaking out about minor references and callbacks haha

This one is very long sorry

So since the last update I have done as much side content as possible before heading to the Hossberg Wetlands and later Weisshaupt (which I just completed last night) which included, briefly, unlocking all of the solas regrets murals

And uh WOW was that whole deep dive a doozy. I definitely should have spaced out the murals over time rather than movie-marathoned them back to back. But the things I learned about Solas…it’s insanity

In a good way

In a really horrifying way

I loved that our theories about Solas being a spirit of Wisdom first were confirmed, and I lost my mind over the fact that the first elves were spirits who gained physical bodies by taking Titan blood (aka lyrium). And the fact that Solas CREATED THE BLIGHT by essentially making the Titans Tranquil?? And that’s why Dwarves don’t dream????

Losing my mind. Solas what have you DONE.

I still ahev to process it all haha but I do have a few thoughts

So far, I wish there was more engagement with these elements and the Chant of Light. The companions react and say that these reveals basically dismantle Andrastianism but the Chant has several allegorical parallels to what, apparently, really happened. The Maker’s first children were spirits, and all that…so I kind of wish the Chantry had a bigger presence in the game with more reactivity

But that’s a post for another day. For now, I reloaded back to only 3 murals unlocked so the team only knows the story up to Solas creating the Veil. I’ll rewatch the others later.

I got worried about being locked out of stuff so I went ahead and did as much side content as I could with a couple of exceptions. Turns out, I probably didn’t need to do that and it would have made more sense narratively if I hadn’t. More on that in a minute

The Siege of Weisshaupt mission was SO GOOD!! Like…the main missions are really where this game shines, I think. I have gripes with some of the companion conversations, but in the actual story missions, the action, the intensity, all of it is so good. And I thought Ghilan’nain turning her archdemon into a many-headed hydra creature was *chefs kiss* so cool. I love fighting big/unique stuff like that!

All that said the follow up scene with the team at the table leaves…a lot to be desired

Listen, DA games pride themselves on bringing together a team of companions that players adore and fall in love with. Naturally we enjoy helping out our companions because we like them. We don’t have to be told to help them because we just generally do that…and if we don’t then, rip, suffer the consequences

So I got a bit annoyed when the scene suddenly turned to a very overt “fix our problems” narrative

I don’t know, that feels so…forced to me. Varric literally tells me I have to solve everyone’s problems. Which is like…I was going to! Because they’re my friends! But being straight up told like “hey you have to solve everyone’s problems and stop their distractions or this team isn’t going to function” is like…I’m sorry are we adults or aren’t we? Why am I being told to babysit the team? Can you guys not pursue these distractions on your own rather than wait for me to give you permission? Did we all forget that two gods are out there rampaging? That they’re strong enough to destroy a fortress that stood against the blight and various conflicts for over 900 years? That they haven’t stopped and show no signs of stopping anytime soon?

But no, by all means, tell me in very obvious terms that my job is now to reconcile all your differences before I face the gods again. That doesn’t feel very handed at all.

Let me be clear. I love to help my companion. I love the idea that you build a team that works well because you have shaped them via your leadership skills. I love the idea that your team works well because you have invested in them. That’s really the heart of any DA game—gather your team, earn their loyalty, and see how well the friends you’ve made along the way assist you in the big battles to come.

But…that scene around the kitchen table could have been so much better, so much more nuanced, and far less “Solve their problems.”

To me, that scene should have been everyone fighting, calling out everyone’s distractions and mistakes, and essentially devolving into outright arguments over the table until Rook yells at everyone to shut up. Everyone is mad, everyone is upset. And then maybe the companions are like “sorry Rook, listen, I have a lot on my mind. I’m still going to help with the Big Problem but I’m also going to pursue this Other Thing whether you like it or not.” No suggestion that it’s now your problem to solve, but a heavy hint that it might get done more quickly if you help (which also gives you room to be an ass and not help). In this scenario, everyone ends up being very disgruntled with you, but you still have your hint that you need to pursue companion questlines if you want to see their cool abilities or special items or get them to be a Hero of the Veilguard or whatever…but that’s just my opinion

Basically I wanted subtly and tension. So much more tension.

What we got instead was a couple of annoyed comments and then Emmrich being like “oh dear we’re all distracted by the things that bother us” and everyone offering up distractions that, yes, need to be resolved…but it’s very easy to be like “hey bud the Hand of Glory and the Nadas Dirthalen can wait until the gods aren’t threatening to destroy the world I think.”

It’s not the worst scene in the world, but it could have been reframed better. Either frame it as “Sorry Rook but none of these factions trust you enough to aid you in the fight, you have to prove yourself to them” (and loop in the companion questlines that way) or show your team literally unraveling because they can’t get along or agree with you—now you see the evidence of what you need to fix, and nobody has to outright tell you to “solve everyone’s distractions.” It’s just implied. Because you saw them fighting. A lot.

Like duh I knew I’d have to resolve everyone’s problems if I want them to like me or stick around! That’s just what I’ve come to expect from RPG games like this. It’s an expectation of the genre. But I don’t want to be told that’s my job now. If anything it triggers my contrarian nature and now I want to see what bad ending I get when I don’t listen to the game’s extremely heavy push for me to deal with everyone’s issues

I won’t, but I’m tempted

I just…wanted it to be better. I want see everyone bitching at each other until everyone leaves in a huff and Rook just sits at the table, head in their hands like “oh my god everyone hates me and they hate each other and we’re going to die if everyone can’t get their shit together”

Then maybe Varric sits down next to them and goes, “Hey kid, did I ever tell you about the time Hawke tried to convince a Rivaini pirate, a weird abomination, a Dalish blood mage, a stiff-necked captain of the guard, a broody elf who glowed in the dark, and a few other friends besides to all agree to fight as a team to stop a qunari invasion in Kirkwall? It worked, more or less. By the end of the night, everyone had worked together enough to end up with one dead Arishok and an entire city’s gratitude.”

Maybe Rook looks up and says, “And how’d they manage that little miracle? Without everyone trying to kill each other in the process.”

And maybe Varric smiles and shrugs. “They had their differences, trust me. Half the time you couldn’t put two of them in a room together without a fight breaking out. But they all believed in one thing. They believed in Hawke.”

Then maybe there’s a pause, as he lets Rook consider that for a moment, before he stands up and says, “It’s a good bedtime story, in any case. I’ll let you sleep on it.”

Sigh. It just would have been cool…

Now in all fairness the scene felt even clunkier because I had actively been doing side quests and helping out my friends so it was like…it felt weird to have this implication that I’m not already helping them. It makes me think I shouldn’t do any of their side quests until after the Siege of Weisshaupt but who knows

I keep pendulum swinging back and forth between moments of brilliance and moments that leave me baffled and wondering who made some of these narrative/writing calls. I don’t hate the game by any stretch of the imagination. Like I said the Siege of Weisshaupt was amazing! And I loved the callbacks to precious games! You should have seen me live reacting and screaming about codexes in the Weisshaupt library haha But it’s like whiplash when something that good is followed up by a scene that feels excessively more hamfisted in comparison.

Anyway I am very busy this weekend and dunno when I’ll get to write another update soooo if you’re following for more, hope to give you more updates in the near-ish future!

[curio-queries]

I’m loving your production breakdown posts, they are so interesting and insightful.

I think you mentioned it maybe in the first ep breakdown but it was about expenses. I just thought it was interesting in ep4 when JK mentioned at the chicken place, paying in cash, and he solely has this conversation with Tae, not Jimin. Would there be an arrangement do you think? Or was that scene cut and he’d have asked Jimin too? I’ve noticed in comparison to Bv where they were usually only allowed a certain amount of money between them, with one usually being in control, or a sum for a task, in AYS, Jimin and JK have been whipping out their cards, be it their own or a company card, in Big Dicks store, in Walmart etc.

I just found it interesting

Hi anon,

The finance bits are interesting in the most boring corporate sense if that makes any sense. 😅 Trust me on this. Let's dive in:

In my opinion, it really boils down to two concerns: taxes and sponsorships. Taxes to insure the company receives every possible benefit for every dollar they spend. Sponsorships because some brands can have fussy rules about how individuals interact with their product and especially any competitor's products while they have an active agreement.

Obviously I have no actual insight onto how the finances and budget were managed for any of these specific shows and I know absolutely nothing of the intricacies of taxes in South Korea but in the US, there are many regulations when it comes to how companies can claim expenditures for tax breaks.

Every company that has had me travel for work has gone to a lot of trouble to insure that I was aware of exactly all of the requirements on my part regarding expenditures. I'm 100% sure all of the BTS members are aware of their requirements as well so I don't particularly think there's any motive other than as a cute convo for the moment between JK and V. Imo, the only reason it made it to the final cut was JKs endearing tone in his response.

Let's go through some examples though:

Receipts: in both AYS and Bon Voyage, we see the members be very specific in getting Receipts. JM and JK talk about it as they're leaving Walmart. In BV, it's all of the shenanigans with the money pouch they acquired in Malta and continued using in New Zealand. This is usually documentation required for any operation that's going to be claimed as a business expense for tax purposes.

Personal Spending: off the top of my head I can think of several clear instances where we know that the members are using their own money for purchases we see them make on the shows. In Run BTS ep.70 in Toronto, JK pays for the member's clothing purchases himself. In BV4, JM pays for the member's clothing himself a couple of times (remember the drama of his lost wallet? 😅)

Budget as Content: BV 1 & 2 mostly only include finances as part of the game-ification of the show. The members had to earn money as an allowance for the activities and determine the best ways to spend it. (I do vaguely remember some members wanting to negotiate for more when buying souvenirs? Was that just in the extra scenes? It's been so long, I've been holding off on rewatching until I'm done with my Run series).

Thankfully, the success of BTS has basically nixed the budget games. I think the last time we saw something like this were the Run episodes of a hotel staycation? But the prices were ficticious and not necessarily about real-world spending but rather determining the secret number to not exceed. (If I'm misremembering and there are more recent examples, please share!) Imo, it would just be too tone-deaf to continue portraying the members in that context. I know we all joke about them being broke millionaires, but there's a reason why celebrity game shows always make it clear that the money involved is for charity.

Anyway, back to AYS, the interesting bit to me is wondering about the inclusion of Taehyung from a budget standpoint. How was that reconciled? None of us can possibly know the answer, but it's interesting to think about. Some costs wouldn't have changed at all with one extra participant, like the house rental, or booking the climbing gym or yacht tour. But there were a few extra concessions, getting the extra mattress likely was more a logistics headache on short notice rather than an impact to the budget. And most Korean meals are served family-style so there honestly isn't a huge difference cost-wise. Except maybe the omakase. That I can imagine was noticeably more expensive with an added individual.

But really, the most expensive item per person would likely have been travel. Did someone say Tae was already in Jeju prior to filming? If he wasn't, did the show cover his flights like they would have JK, JM, and the crew? Or is the budget on these shows big enough that it was just another drop in a bucket? Also, the intent likely was for JK to zip around on the motorbike and JM to be on the scooter. I'm curious if they weren't logistically able to get another such vehicle with the short notice or if the budget/sponsorship constraint didn't allow for a third one the day. Or it could be that the scooter exists because of the 3 member count and production thought one of them could be JKs backpack. That bike has the space for it. But perhaps the difficulty to get coverage and/or converse wasn't appealing. Or maybe there just wasn't a third radio-enabled helmet prepared?

I know the various shippers are using this in their arguments. I'd like to firmly state that I am not building a case for either side here. Go do that on your own and leave me out of it. Lol.

There are so many questions and it's interesting to theorize how the finances could have impacted the development of the show. Maybe we'll get some more insight with the remaining episodes and bonus footage but I doubt it. Finances don't usually make for engaging content.

Thanks again for the ask! It's one of the points I want to discuss when I start doing my BV and ITS posts but who knows when that will be!

[leikeliscomet]

Let's Talk About Thasmin

Intro Chapter 1 - Not Something I Usually Do [TW: SA Mentions] Chapter 2 - I Haven't Even Told Anyone, Not Even Myself Chapter 3 & Conclusion - I Wish This Would Go On Forever

Intro

I didn’t know how to write about Thasmin because I didn’t understand what Thasmin was. 

I’m in a weird position with it. I watched the Chibnall era and barely thought about it. I knew about it in series 11, not minding if it became canon or if Ryasmin would instead. I thought Yaz’s attachment to Thirteen seemed stronger than Ryan and Graham’s in series 12 and it was interesting but not that exciting enough for me to go full thassie. I liked the Thasmin bits in series 13 like in Eve of the Daleks and Legend of the Sea Devils (even though I didn’t like the rest of it). But after my rewatch, several things started coming together. I started to see Thirteen and Yaz differently, even seeing parts of them in myself and essentially started looking at the Chibnall era a bit differently as a whole. It’s still not my fave era, but there’s things from it I can appreciate that I didn’t see before.

What interests me about Thasmin isn’t just the ship itself but how the fandom talks about it. Both praise and critiques. Thasmin is the first sapphic ship involving the Doctor, with one sapphic only realising her attraction to women recently, and the other essentially being one of the very few asexual sapphic characters in mainstream TV at the time. Thasmin was fresh with potential but as the essay goes on and from the fandom’s reaction, the potential didn’t fully blossom in the way a lot of fans wanted it to. Whilst I’ve stayed indifferent to it, this ship is somehow so controversial it’s torn the fandom in half, caused many YouTube videos, debates and articles (like this lol) and caused some of the wildest discourse I’ve ever seen throughout my time in the fandom. So this essay is basically an attempt at an asexual, lesbian and possibly bi interpretation of what Thasmin tried to be, how lesbophobia and compulsory sexuality shape the fandom’s ideas about queerness using Thasmin as an example and what Thasmin could've been if handled differently.

I need to make it clear this essay isn’t about proving whether or not Thasmin is queerbait. The discourse since 2022, to me, is unproductive, repetitive and only reinforces misinformation and ignorance towards other queer labels. Regardless of writing quality, Yasmin Khan and the Thirteenth Doctor have confirmed feelings for each other so in my personal opinion, I don’t consider the ship queerbait. I’m aware queerbait has expanded definitions like how the queer character’s storylines and how the queer relationship is carried out but to me, that isn’t proof either. Queerness is a large umbrella term of various identities that are outside of the norm, so not all forms of queerness depend on or can be ‘proven’ solely with a romantic/sexual relationship. These definitions to me exclude queer people whose queerness isn’t dependent on those things or doesn’t involve them at all. Lastly, I don’t believe the conclusion of bad queer representation is that it isn’t queer. It is. It just flopped. 

I’m not writing to prove Thirteen really loved Yaz because as far as I’m concerned, her feelings for Yaz are canon. I’m not writing to prove Thasmin is toxic or morally good because as far as I’m concerned, all ships involving the Doctor, a morally grey character, are all morally grey in their own ways and that would mean also critiquing the ethics of Thoschei, Tenrose, TwelveClara and DoctorRiver. I have no interest in doing this or singling out Thasmin as some unique evil because to me that’s performative. I’m not writing to prove that Yaz is ‘really gay’ or ‘gay enough’ because as far as I’m concerned she is a canon sapphic companion and I don’t believe in gold-star, lesbophobic or biphobic rhetoric to erase any sapphic character’s attraction to women. I’m not writing to prove Thirteen/The Doctor is ‘actually asexual’ because as far as I’m concerned they are, as confirmed by Tennant, Smith, Pertwee, other actors and the official account and I don't care for the validity or close-minded opinions of anti-asexual and ace exclusionist fans, the same way I don’t care for the approval or permission from homophobes, lesbophobes, biphobes, transphobes or any group of queerphobic people to exist.

If you’ve come to this essay for me to critique Thasmin specifically on the basis that the Thirteenth Doctor, Yasmin Khan and/or Thasmin the ship have failed to live up to some arbitrary measure of queerness and that they are un-queer, less queer, fake queer, queerbait or ‘cishet’ then basically… you’re in the wrong place.

With that out of the way, let’s talk Thasmin!

Chapter 1 ->

[unofficial-book-of-quotes-tm]

Series 7 is done! My final thoughts as always under the keep reading.

Now, I'm going to level with you here. Series 7 has never been a favourite of mine, in fact, I used to dislike it a lot, so I put rewatching it for this blog off for quite some time. I actually can't recall how many times I've watched each series of Taskmaster at this point, but series 7 always kind of annoyed me, therefore I didn't particularly look forward to watching it. Now, let me tell you how surprised I was that I found it a lot of fun on this rewatch. I mean, it's still not in my top five, but I had a lot more fun with it than I expected to have and I'm not entirely sure why. For me, Rhod Gilbert and Kerry Godliman carried the show, and they were the contestants I enjoyed most when watching series 7.

I think Kerry is probably the perfect Taskmaster contestant. She's incredibly competitive and wants to win at all cost, but she also accepts Greg's ruling (with a little push back sometimes), doesn't throw a fucking tantrum whenever she feels treated unfairly, and doesn't overstep the line into annoying the shit out of me. And I have to agree with Greg here, her approach was rather simple most of the time (get the task, do the task, bosh) but I think that has a lot of charm, especially when contrasted with some of the overthinkers. Series 7 is one of those series where I don't care at all about Greg's scoring thus I don't mind Kerry winning the series by one point or what it was.

Now, Rhod. I honestly think he took the gig mainly to embarrass / annoy Greg, though his mission then seemed to change to either getting Alex to strip at every opportunity or to tying him up. There is something to be said about these two things and I don't know if it was a conscious decision of Rhod’s, but I’m absolutely here for it and refuse to analyse it closer.

Jessica Knappett is a bit of a wild card for me ‘cos there are moments when she's utterly hilarious and she made me laugh out loud a couple of times, but that was usually accidental on her part, though there are also a fair few moments when I despaired watching her. Overall, I did enjoy her.

I think similarly about Phil Wang, though I do have to say, what the fuck had he been thinking when picking his outfit?! I won’t complain about Phil repeating his haggling joke, just as I won't complain about Rhod basically recycling his prize task entry over and over again. I thought it was funny.

Now, on to my probably most controversial take yet; I don't like James Acaster. Before I get stoned to death, I'd like to say that I don't know a lot of the guy. I've seen him like once on The Big Fat Quiz Of The Year, but I haven't watched his stand-up or listened to his podcast(s), etc, though to be fair I don't do that in general for any competitor. I just found him too… bratty (if that's the word) or too confrontational. Yes, him butting heads with Rhod is entertaining, but I think he lacked what I really appreciate about older comedians; The understanding of when to move on / let others have the joke. I know there are several ways of watching Taskmaster and everyone finds other contestants funnier or other bits of the show more important and that's all totally valid. I'm just some bloke on the internet, don’t let me tell you how you should watch / enjoy something, but personally, I find contestants who constantly seek Greg's approval and praise a bit irritating. I'm certain James is a lovely guy, but his comedy persona unfortunately doesn't work for me.

However, James’ persona allowed for really entertaining clashes with Rhod, which made the boys team a bit more fun to watch than the girls team, simply because they had conflict. But it was also nice to have a team be wholesome and just get shit done.

The prerecorded tasks in series 7 were amazing, but I do think they could've done better on the studio tasks. Some could've done with a little polish. But there were so many tasks, which I think I really would've enjoyed having a go at, chief amongst them the video game task and those where they had to figure something out guided by clues.

I don’t have to say much about Greg and Alex, only that after series 6, their interactions seemed to have cooled down in this series, but fortunately Rhod delivered. Watching Rhod watch Greg and Alex interact is fucking hilarious. That man looks like he knows something we don’t (I have no evidence to support any such claim). So, yeah, overall I enjoyed series 7 more than I expected I would, but it will never be a favourite of mine. Can’t wait to get to series 8 as I barely remember anything at all about this one. Thanks for sticking around! See you in series 8!

[deyasworld]

Deedark heacanons?

I loved the ones you made a while back and was wondering if you had more!

Awww! Thank you, you’re very sweet! 😊💕

Sure! Let me remember them.

• I used to headcanon that Dee Dee snores, but when rewatching the show I noticed that Mandark is the one that Canonically snores, and they usually write Dee Dee as a silent sleeper. Now that I think about it, it might make sense, since he has a very narrow neck lolllll Edit: I forgot to mention that Mandark canonically Talks In His Sleep!!!!

• I also used to headcanon that Dee Dee is an early bird and that she sleeps early, and that Mandark was the night owl, but now that I think about the kinds of jobs they have, maybe their sleeping schedules should be the other way around 😆. I mean, ballet studios tend to be an after school activity, meaning that she would be working in the afternoons, and he runs a laboratory, so his office hours would be from 8 AM to 5 PM, but he stays up late working extra hours. I like to think their sleeping schedules sync because of it.

• They live together by 23, but have probably been roommates since before. I don’t know why I’m fixated on 23, I came up with this when I was 19, and 23 sounded like a very exciting age at the time. I’m turning 31 in June, and giving this some thought it still feels like a good age! It’s a challenging time for many, there’s so much societal pressure to get your shit together after college, but you still want to enjoy life ““before 25””, so it would be very nice if they’re together through it.

• They probably don’t marry until 25 though, because it feels like a “serious” age to them, but mostly because I want them to still call each other boyfriend and girlfriend for a while ( and Fiancé for a while too lolll ). Although 25 is still young! Don’t hurry things just because that age sounds scary 💝 People will think you’re 21 at 30, and 16 at 21. There’s always time; take things slow. ( I’m only keeping the headcanons because they feel lived in ).

• For Dee Dee’s job, I like to think she joined a ballet company, so in her early adulthood she’s doing a lot of performances. She gets the instructor job later, to get a steady paycheck. She begins to suffer muscle pains because she’s not 10 anymore, so I like to imagine that Mandark helps monitoring her muscle health and he’s Very serious about it, I’m talking massages, 3D diagrams they update every week, keeps a journal and plans a diet for her. At some point she retires from the performances and dedicates herself to be an instructor, but she returns to the stage every other year. Edit: I’ve been following ballerinas on social media and watching documentaries to learn about their life styles, so I think she’ll be healthy for a very long time. Mandark is still concerned about her health though.

• I have several AUs for these two, but most of my headcanons for them are in the FusionFall verse. I really really like that Universe! It inspires me a lot. I should illustrate some headcanons someday. If you want to hear any FF specific headcanons, let me know!

• From their personalities in canon, I like to think they’re both very clingy, in particular Mandark. He’s very needy, needs lots of validation and has tendencies of low self-esteem, and she’s too cuddly, she’ll walk in on you when you’re busy to shower you with attention. I think it makes them perfect for each other; they’re both smothering with affection, and it makes them natural outlets. They probably tire each other sometimes, but they’re back at it again afterwards.

Thanks for the ask! Hope these work for you! 🫶💖💕

Have some Milk and Mocha, they’re my go-to DeeDark mascots 🐻‍❄️🐻

[mcu-multiverse-order-review]

Introduction

The Marvel Cinematic Universe is most definitely a series of films… and shows… and now a multiverse… containing even more films… and shows... Fuck.

Ok, so by now we are all very aware of how fucked the MCU is, right? Like, no one in their right mind would want to compile everything that the MCU references in its multiverse and slap that into a list, and then proceed to watch that list, right? 

So that’s what I did.

I've compiled everything that ties directly into the MCU, or has elements that tie into the MCU. This list contains too many films, shows, short films, and even a couple video games. I shouldn’t do this, but no one is stopping me, so I’m going to.

Ok, so here’s how this list works, it is all digital media that ties into the MCU in one way or another (Usually through the multiverse saga), the exception to this is a film series that makes reference to the MCU, but is not referenced back. I included things attached to this series because I honestly just wanted an excuse to rewatch it. I will tell you what this series is when we get to it. 

Also this list is in order of release, not in MCU timeline order, cos honestly fuck that. This however does result in the funny outcome of I won’t actually be getting to the MCU itself for a while. Everything upfront is stuff that will come back later.

Understood? No? Unstandable, let’s begin.

Except, wait a moment, I got halfway through writing the first review and realised I never explained universe numbers, because of course I didn’t, why the fuck would I have to? Annoyingly, I do, because the universe “Earth-616” is gonna get brought up a lot.

So what is “Earth-616”? It’s the main Marvel comic universe. All Marvel properties are made in relation to the Earth-616 comics.

Every single Marvel property has its own universe number, even the MCU itself has a different universe number, being “Earth-199999”, much to Kevin Feige’s dismay.

And I suppose while your still here I should explain who I am and what I'm actually doing here.

So hi, I'm Teri. I'm a freelance artist and animator, with severely untreated ADHD. I made this list mostly I'm just a Superhero nerd, but also to prove the point that the MCU has fallen into the same trappings as the main Marvel comics; that being it has become to intertwined and overly complicated.

I'm gonna be working on this project slowly, so don't expect me to be rushing out pages and pages of review, especially as there is a lot of content for me to cover. I want to take my time.

Also don't expect these to be true reviews. For the most part this is me just throwing my thoughts out about everything. I can't guarantee it'll be completely coherent.

And I suppose I should cover some ground rules as well regarding interacting with this blog and the blog itself:

Absolutely no bigotry. This includes racism, sexism, homophobia & transphobia. I will not be lenient with the ban hammer.

No being creepy. This includes sexual harassment and nonces. I ain't doing this to get fucked messages.

No being a prick. That is to me or anyone else. let's be civil yeah.

I swear. A lot. I don't apologise for this. If my language upsets you, you're not going to enjoy your time here, I suggest finding somewhere else.

Other than my swearing, I have no intention of upsetting anyone. If I say anything actually offensive, please let me know and I'll get on making changes.

Hopefully, that should be everything covered.

Now, let's actually begin...

[sillyunicorn]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers 💫

thank you @mostlymaudlin for the tag <3 tagging @facewithoutheart @martsonmars @cutestkilla and @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

68! Which is…wild. Six of them are songs though.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

126,027 - dang!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily the simon snow series and all for the game. I recently got into young royals so a few there as well, plus one each for a couple other shows I like.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Like rory my top 5 are all andreil! aftg has a large and voracious readership. Better than Sex (4k, T) / Eating Well (1k, T) / Needing/Getting (3k, T) / Friendly Neighborhood Vamp (.5k, T) / Soak up the Sun (.5k, T)

Rest under the cut!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Usually yes! Sometimes I go through spells of not replying…but I’m grateful for every single kudos and comment, it’s amazing and wonderful <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This is tough bc i love me a happy ending and i don’t really do angst anyway lmao. My joke answer is my crack andreil fic Monday, but maybe the real answer is my snowbaz fic+song Breakable bc I left off before things get fully resolved (but it is clearly hopeful imo).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The happiEST?? Hmmm. I think my overall Happiest fic might be like, Mon Chou? And Better than Sex. both of those are just like, gooey with happiness. And both have happy endings so I’ll say one of them. Actually from a different approach I’ll say my time loop fic has the happiest ending bc it’s probably the angstiest thing I’ve written haha so the ending is such a relief. 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have not!! Super grateful for everyone who leaves lovely warm positive comments on my work <3333 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not on my own LOL. i do have some M/E fics in my works though thanks to some collabs (see Q13 lol) <3

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have not! I think about it sometimes….it’s just usually hard for me to imagine a world where all my blorbos live, even though I almost only write AUs…a mystery

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, which is wild!!! I think several of my Vandrew fics and BtS have been translated into russian. Thank you translators, you’re incredible. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes!! This was one of my most fun and treasured early fandom experiences with @facewithoutheart and @martsonmars <3 published results include The Chain (i was really just losing my mind in the doc while christina wrote tbh) and The Muse’s Waking which is probably the weirdest thing I’ve ever (partially) written hahah

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Making me chooooooose ugh. Idk man i reread a snowbaz fic today and almost cried and they were my first fandom love so today i’m going to say them <3 

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I recently picked up a fic i abandoned 2 years ago so now i’m like well never say never! But one that’s in my “this is in the past now” pile that i was just thinking about is my andreil Alex Rider (TV) AU. i actually had an idea for how to get around the bit i was stuck on while rewatching Alex Rider the other day sooo…. But likely still abandoned

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think, somewhat incongruously, 1) writing concisely and 2) setting a mood. I think both these things are true in say Weightless (andreil, 1k, T).

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

PLOT. plot is so hard. That’s too broad of an answer so i’ll say, keeping multiple storylines/arcs progressing at once. I don’t do it much. It’s a fun challenge though. I usually write little one-shot, single-conflict fics bc that comes easier for me. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Love it. Not fluent in any other language enough to really do it justice but i’d like to.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I think i wrote some hp and some jane austen fic before i ever got into Fandom Proper lol. First published fandom was for the Simon Snow Series <3

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I think the one i’ve gone back to the most is Weightless. I set it in one of my favorite IRL places and it has tender blood drinking so. How could I beat that, really?

[yell0wsalt]

@backwards-blackbird did this and I thought it was fun

Favorite color:

Yellow (of course) but olive green is a solid one, too. They both go so well with my skin tone. Weird I don't wear enough of those colors though.

Last song I listened to:

Last movie I watched:

I don’t watch many movies. I gotta have someone to do that with haha. I prefer TV shows usually, so I’m having a hard time recalling the last movie I watched. Probably Barbie

Other stuff I watched this year:

See next question, but I did watch The Little Mermaid live action.

Shows I dropped this year/didn’t finish:

The years not over, so don’t count me out on these, yet!

What I am watching are AOT (just the last episode left!), Fall of the House of Usher, and Fruits Basket 2019 (rewatching bc I can)

Currently reading:

Fanfic— Life is very busy and I’m behind on a lot of friends’ uploads

Currently listening to:

Currently working on:

I have several WIPs I hop back and forth periodically. I'm getting over the writer's block I had with my spooky fic, so I’m chipping away at that. Hopefully before the year’s over I’ll feel okay to post the first chapter 😅

There’s my EraserMic 5+1 fic

And a few other ideas are on the back burner for now. Tis the season for holiday things after all

Current obsession:

My OTPs

No pressure tagging: @kurocache @risingsoleil @wangsfires @orangepanic and anyone else interested!

[midnightrings]

Writing Analysis: River Song (Part One: Silence of the Library/Forest of the Dead)

[Note: Some time ago, when I decided to rewatch Doctor Who to catch up (which has been a while ago, I keep getting distracted lmao) I’ve had the idea to pay some close attention to how River Song’s character arc and storyline evolve throughout the show. Mainly out of personal interest (and also because I’m still working on a River/Doctor multichapter fanfiction), I’ve started taking some notes during her appearances to somewhat analyse her character and writing.

I’ve always found her writing quite interesting because a) she was written out of order, and b) she only appeared in a handful of episodes/stories. Yet, I still completely fell in love with her character (and her relationship with the Doctor), never feeling like she or her arc were not fully developed.

I have not really shared many analyses/interpretations/etc. for a while now (mainly because I’m not that active in most fandom spaces anymore cause … well, they can be rather exhausting), though I always enjoy it and told myself I will start sharing them more often, just in case someone is interested in reading them. This will obviously be in several parts (that I have not finished yet, so I don’t know how long this will take). I will also keep it quite general throughout (so this won't be a deep dive analysis of her) as the focus lays more on how her character and relationship with the Doctor evolve, rather than trying to analyse every single frame. ]

River’s character

This two-parter introduces us to her character and we already learn quite a lot about her. The episodes show that she is clearly smart and intelligent - besides the fact that she is an archeology professor, she also shows technical knowledge and can easily follow the Doctor’s thoughts and instructions. She has a mind of her own and can be quite stubborn as well – not signing Lux’s agreement, not listening to the Doctor when she believes him to be in the wrong, taking charge herself. On top of that, she also displays a lot of compassion: she cares about her team’s wellbeing, obviously about the Doctor too, and later sacrifices herself to save everyone else. Essentially, she clearly shows a lot of character traits you would usually see in the Doctor’s companions, and perhaps even beyond that, as she appears equal to the Doctor in both, intelligence and agency.

“Funny thing is, this means you've always known how I was going to die. All the time we've been together, you knew I was coming here.”

This also introduces us to her theme of time (and time travel, obviously). She coins the term spoilers here, due to not being able to tell the Doctor anything about his future, despite his attempts to find out more. It also shows that she is responsible about time travel, as once she realizes the Doctor has never met her before, she tries to keep any possible spoilers to herself. She also prevents him from killing himself, keeping the timeline in tact (though this was probably majorly due to more selfish reasons, as she obviously did not want to eliminate their time together). This also makes her appear as rather mysterious, though I would not necessarily describe her as a generally secretive person, as she does not hide her emotions or thoughts as showcased by her conversations with and about the Doctor. She does not choose to be secretive, she simply has to be.

Relationship with the Doctor

“He hasn't met me yet. I sent him a message but it went wrong. It arrived too early. This is the Doctor in the days before he knew me. And he looks at me - he looks right through me - and it shouldn't kill me, but it does.”

The nature of their relationship (at least out of River’s perspective at this point) becomes pretty clear throughout the story. Messaging him via his psychic paper, the conversations (or, I’d rather say monologues) she has with her team and Donna in regards to the Doctor as well as her death speech show the close connection she has with him. The slight flirting (specifically in the beginning of the first episode, before she realizes he does not know her yet) also let’s us know exactly what type of connection that is, as well as her heartbreak upon realizing he has not met her before.

In this context, we also get the theme of trust. The Doctor is clearly wary of her, and when she uses a screwdriver (which a future version of the Doctor has given to her) – while it shows us even more how close they would be in the future – it makes him even more suspicious of her. This then prompts River to tell him his name in order for him to trust her. With his name representing such a huge secret and mystery, it is clear now that she is someone extremely special to him, and it becomes clear to the Doctor as well, turning his caution into trust (to some extent, at least). It also creates an interesting relationship between Ten and River for the rest of the episode, as – while he does not know her yet – he is aware that she will be important to him in the future, in the end saving her for his future self’s sake.

“Doctor, one day I'm going to be someone that you trust, completely. But I can't wait for you to find that out. So I'm going to prove it to you. And I'm sorry. I'm really very sorry.“

Of course, the theme of time plays an important role in their relationship here as well. River’s diary, which consists of their future together, becomes a symbol for their relationship, not just in this story, but throughout their episodes. River breaking the spoilers-rule by telling the Doctor that she knows his true name lays the aforementioned basis of trust they would not otherwise have. The screwdriver – though we won’t see it again until River’s last episode – also turns into another symbol, allowing the Doctor through his future self to save her, initially creating a paradox. And then, of course, her death: the Doctor, being forced to watch her die, before even knowing her, represents – despite the otherwise somewhat (twisted) happy ending – the tragedy of their relationship.

Mystery

Now, for a good part of her storyline, the mystery surrounding her character and her relationship with the Doctor is also a prominent theme. I’ve decided to make this a separate category instead of a continuous theme, as it obviously does not occupy her entire storyline but it is an interesting aspect to look at, and see how – in terms of writing – that mystery evolves.

At this point, the mystery consists of only one question: who is she in relation to the Doctor? Of course, River’s interactions with him throughout this two-parter, her final speech and the knowledge of his name strongly hint at the fact that she is in a romantic relationship with him (or will be in the future, out of his perspective). It is never completely revealed, of course but made as apparent as it could be without directly stating it. So the mystery at this point is more whether we will see her again and see her story with the Doctor unfold or not.

Misc. thoughts

I find it quite interesting that the term ‘spoilers’ was first used at the beginning of this story by the Doctor and Donna. While later on, it definitely becomes River’s term (almost like a catchphrase) and is primarily centered around their relationship, at this point it was clearly meant as a theme for the episode that they later reused for River’s entire arc.

General/Final thoughts

What I believe to be very interesting about this two-parter is that, obviously, no one knew whether River would return or not, and as such, she is written like a one-time character. Thankfully, she returned for future episodes, but the story did not need further episodes to back up her character arc. She has been created and written for this story and was as such an already fleshed-out character as we finish the two-parter. And I believe that this really helped her character writing. Had they already known she would return, I have no doubt she would’ve been left rather ambiguous, to allow to shape her character more as the story progresses and to create a bigger mystery (as is done later). Her character arc is already well rounded at this point, and all of the future storylines essentially simply add onto that and use this story as a basis for her character, basically functioning as an outline for her future story arc.

[castielmoriarty]

I have so many thoughts on Aaron’s vs. Robert’s respective internalized homophobia, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to sort them, but. I think I was too quick in a previous post to say that Aaron “has let go of his shame.” I’ve been rewatching the parts with Rebecca before Aaron goes to prison, during which his idea of what Rob feels about his sexuality keeps coming up, and. Aaron has, I believe, consistently strongly overestimated how much Rob actually struggles with being bi. I mean, first we have the affair era; sure, Rob keeps insisting that he is straight, but he isn’t with Chrissie to hide that he likes men. he could do that by simply dating women, any woman. he’s with Chrissie because of greed and wanting his hands on what the White family has got, which would also ofc let him one-up Andy. but Aaron seems to think, all along, that for Rob it’s mainly about hiding his sexuality. when the rumours are going around that Rob is cheating, Aaron more or less goes “it’s ok they think it’s a woman” and Rob is like ??how is that??less of a problem?? because his main fear isn’t to be outed as “also likes men,” but to lose his chance to the White’s money, estate, et.c. but Aaron just doesn’t get greed as a motivator, and isn’t capable of being like “weird thing to be motivated by but ok,” and instead makes it make sense by projecting onto Rob his own past extreme fear of coming out.

let’s recall a couple of things Aaron did that had to do with his shame about his sexuality; punched Jackson. battered Paddy. couldn’t even look at Adam, his best friend, when he had found out, even when he kept saying that he was totally fine with it. and then made a suicide attempt because of it all. what does Rob do except for verbally deny liking men? and to be fair, he usually denies being gay, which he isn’t. but he also does say several times that he is straight, sure. but then after being outed by Aaron, does he have a mental breakdown over it? no, all he does is quite calmly (unless I’ve forgotten some outburst about it) deny it for a while, like what, a few weeks? before he gives up and stops denying it. when he and Aaron finally get together, he has no issue being completely open with it. Rob is also more comfortable with pda than Aaron ever is. iirc pretty much every instance of pda between them is initiated by Rob. and then, but here I have to add another iirc, after Rob decides to stop denying his sexuality, he has that period of time during which Aaron pretends he’s over him but Rob keeps flirting, sometimes quite openly. clearly Rob’s shame is never anywhere near the levels that Aaron’s were, and Aaron is just fully incapable of seeing it. he never stops seeing Rob’s struggles with his sexuality through the filter of his own experiences. seems to never be able to actually separate his own struggles from Rob’s and see that they aren’t the same. overall I don’t think Rob spends much time at all thinking about the fact that being with a man makes him “different,” but that what shame does remain takes the form of how he talks about other queer people as “they,” and that he doesn’t want to go to gay clubs or be in other "queer contexts.” and this is clearly due to how his main coping mechanism is detaching himself from things, and going to gay clubs is one thing that is going to harshly remind him that in the eyes of society, they are different, are an exception to a rule; one his dad couldn’t accept. and that stays with him, but is only an issue when he’s directly confronted by it by specific circumstances. ones he can easily avoid most of the time. but Aaron, I think, still has more shame left about it than he's willing to admit. and that so much of his idea about how Rob still hasn’t accepted himself is, as said, just projecting, just his own insecurity. “he doesn’t want me deep down, he wants normalcy with a woman, that’s why he keeps hanging around Rebecca.” it makes sense in Aaron’s head even when it’s so damn far from the truth, because in his mind there’s still truth to straight = normal. god, I don’t know. it’s just. Rob’s motivation to keep hanging out with Rebecca is very clearly two of his most common motivators; greed/money, and revenge. and the problem is that he’s so used to having the cake and eating it that he can’t bring himself to stop hanging out/working with her, even when it affects Aaron so negatively (I don’t think Aaron’s jealousy should be allowed to set the rules for everything Rob does though, within reason, but that’s another topic). and even that is something Aaron fails to understand. Rob doesn’t keep hanging out with Rebecca because he loves doing so, he just doesn’t find it reasonable that he should have to give up something he wants (the money from the work they could do together) because of how it makes someone else feel, even when that person is Aaron. especially when it, in his view, will serve Aaron as well in the end.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 26 part one

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Stuff)

Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes! 

I’m Coming Up So You Better Get This Party Started

The Lans arrive just in time to see Cousin Jin Zixun hassling Su She, and they wonder how he has the fucking nerve to come to a party that they are also invited to. 

Su she was invited by his new best friend Jin Guangyao, who deploys a full-on charm attack, wrapping Su She permanently around his little finger. 

Smoother than the Lanling weather that’s how he holds himself together Watch out, he’ll charm you 

Jin Guangyao grew up with women who earned their living by being charming, pleasant, and hiding their true thoughts from their clients, and he appears to have mastered this useful skill set. With Su She, he exudes confidence and authority, allowing the lesser man to bask in his attention.

With Zewu Jun he deploys helplessness and embarrassment, effectively controlling a man with much greater power than his own.

Lan Xichen confronts him about Su She's presence, and Jin Guangyao pretends he didn't know that Su She was ex-Lan. This seems super unlikely, given that JGY is good at collecting information that he can use to fuck with people, and also that he sheltered Lan Xichen from the Wens directly after Su She betrayed him.

Lan Xichen seems like he doesn't believe what JGY is telling him but then he decides to drop it, passive-aggressively saying that since JGY is uninformed, he's not guilty. Lan Xichen is actually assuming a lot here about his right to tell Jin Guangyao who to invite and who to shun, but JGY doesn't push back. Lying is so much simpler.

(more behind the cut!)

Su She wins for most unintentionally sarcastic-seeming toasting expression.

Jiang Cheng, Party Animal

Jiang Cheng arrives at the party, bringing his Jiang retinue and his bad temper. He super obviously casts around to try to find Wei Wuxian, who already told him he probably wasn't coming to the party.

Jiang Cheng is that guy who only comes to a party because the girl he likes said she was thinking about going, and then he spends the whole party saying "hey have you seen Mei Lin? She said she was going to be here but I don't see her."

Jin Guangyao formally congratulates Jiang Cheng on the Jiang clan's success in the hunt, and Jin Guangshan toasts him. As always, Jiang Cheng reacts to praise from authority figures like it's rain in the desert, smiling from ear to ear. He says that the Jiang Clan will donate the prey from the hunt to the other gentry clans. ...what?

Are we seriously saying that when these dudes go night hunting it's not just to remove dangerous bad stuff, it's for profit? 

Like, do they eat monsters? Wear their fur? Make leather from their skin? Carve jewelry from their claws? Is Jiang Cheng wearing a purple monster's skin right now? (There will be an art prompt at the end of this post)

Meanwhile, check out the way Nie Huaisang is looking at Jiang Cheng, wow.

Forecast: Hazing

Having gotten the single pleasant part of the banquet over with, it's time for the Jins to pick on the Lans. Cousin Jin Zixun goads Lan Xichen into taking a drink with him, knowing that this is (mostly) against Lan rules. Jin Guangyao tries to stop him by saying, hilariously, that it's bad to drink and fly on a sword, but CJZX waves this away and keeps pushing, saying that if Lan Xichen won't drink, it's an insult to him.

A random cultivator who is definitely on the Jin payroll backs him up, saying that teetotaling is for losers, and Captain Blowhard boisterously agrees. Loudly agreeing with powerful people is the Yao clan's signature martial arts skill.

Jin Guangyao looks embarrassed and helpless, which is, as mentioned before, his own signature skill. But he's just playing his own part in this piece of theater; everything happening at this party (so far) is happening for the benefit of the Jin Clan. Cousin Jin Zixun is an ass, but he's not actually a loose cannon, and Jin Guangshan is clearly enjoying the Lans' discomfort.

Why? This entire party, the hunt, everything he's done since the end of the Sunshot campaign, has been designed to increase and consolidate his power. His main goal is to get the Yin Tiger seal, but reducing the status of the Lans is also a good move for him. The Lans have been the strongest opponents to the use of resentful energy, and worked the hardest to conceal and contain the Yin iron in the past. If he wants to use resentful energy as part of his own cultivation, he needs them to chill. 

So this is a bit of a test; will they comply with the will of the larger group in order to avoid conflict, or will they refuse, which will allow him to label them as iconoclastic weirdos?. 

Lan Xichen takes a long look at his brother, who is expressing all sorts of emotions while keeping his face very very still. 

At a guess, he is thinking that this entire party is bullshit, that his brother's willingness to play along with these assholes is bullshit, that being viciously beaten for having a single drink in his life was bullshit, that Wei Wuxian not being here right now is bullshit.

Lan Xichen picks the "go along, get along" path, having his drink and using his magic skill of anti-intoxication to neutralize it, as he'd done previously when drinking with Wei Wuxian. 

Cousin Jin Zixun picks on Lan Wangji next, and since he cannot magically or even non-magically tolerate alcohol, there is a real risk to his reputation if he drinks. But Lan Wangji breaks rules when he feels like it, not when people tell him to. He pointedly ignores the offered drink while Lan Xichen looks worried. 

The rest of the party guests have a wide variety of reactions, none of them helpful, to these shenanigans. Jin Guanshan's son and heir watches with calm interest as the power dynamics play out.

All of this is actually not great strategy for the Jins. The Lans don't play little social games to gain power, because all that time they spend not drinking, not gossiping, and not doing other stuff? Is spent cultivating and practicing sword and musical battle forms. The Lan Bros are overwhelmingly powerful as individuals, and embarrassing them won't change that.

It's moot, ultimately, because Wei Wuxian chooses this moment to arrive.

Darkness Visible

Wei Wuxian actually made a big impressive stair-climbing entrance to Jinlintai a few minutes ago, with camera work echoing Lan Wangji's stair climb at the Wen Indoctrination Bureau from several episodes back. 

But nobody was around to see that, other than us, and when he appears at the party it's in stealth mode; he steps into the frame from out of nowhere, and drinks Lan Wangji's unwanted drink.

Lan Wangji responds by looking at him like this for the next several minutes.

Wei Wuxian doesn't have time for their usual sport of Extreme Gazing, though; he came for a reason, which is to find and rescue Wen Ning. He gets right to it, asking Cousin Jin Zixun where he's keeping him.

Jiang Cheng, who is the king of worrying about the wrong fucking thing, jumps up to try to stop Wei Wuxian from talking. Like, seriously, he's ok with the Jins trying to take his clan's special extreme weapon, but he's not ok with his head disciple being rude in order to fulfill a whopper of a life debt--Jiang Cheng's life debt, in particular--or being rude in order to preserve the clan's independence.

Jin Guangshan decides this is a good moment to bring up the Yin tiger amulet. Wei Wuxian pushes back, hard, pointing out exactly what Jin Guangshan is doing. He says he's setting himself up to be a new Wen Ruohan. 

Lan Wangji pays close attention to Wei Wuxian's reasoning here, and so does Nie Mingjue, unless he’s just trying to mask his confusion. 

Jiang Cheng is too busy being horrified to listen, apparently. Or he just doesn’t agree, preferring to be reduced to a secondary authority, rather than defy a primary authority.

Wei Wuxian is, of course, all about independence; he was literally born to be a rogue cultivator, despite being dubbed “patriarch” himself, not long after this. 

Let’s Go Crazy Let’s Get Nuts

Wei Wuxian gets tired of the scene and decides to lose his temper. He makes a show of being enraged, and he genuinely is angry, but I don't think he's out of control, this time.  

He acts like he's out of control in order to scare everyone, but he makes his points very clearly, reminding everyone that he has power they don't have, that he's good at killing, that he's not patient, and that his teeth are nicer than everybody else’s. 

Everybody in the room freaks out to one degree or another--except Jin Guangshan, who is apparently too pissed off to be scared.

It's hilarious that Jin Guangshan thought he was going to get Wei Wuxian to hand the Yin Tiger amulet over by creating a complex system of social pressure against him. Wei Wuxian's favorite way of responding to social pressure is to escalate it into violence, regardless of the consequences; he's been doing that at least since Gusu Summer School and probably a lot longer. Jin Guangshan should know this, given how many beatings his son has taken from Wei Wuxian over the years.

Wei Wuxian does a fantastically sexy scary, theatrical countdown, and Cousin Jin Zixun caves in and gives him the information he wants. It's worth noticing that even under threat of death, CJZX doesn't comply until he visually checks in with his clan leader. He’s genuinely a bad person, yes, but he’s a loyal soldier, which is what most of these clans value most. 

As soon as he gets what he wants, Wei Wuxian is perfectly, smugly, in control of himself again. Everyone in the room is still stunned and afraid, so Jin Guangshan has achieved that much, at least; nobody likes Wei Wuxian having the Yin tiger seal now, including Jiang Cheng. 

As he leaves, Wei Wuxian has one of those conversations with Lan Wangji in which everything is said in glances in the course of a couple of seconds. 

WWX: I love you, I have to leave you; I've got some shit to take care of and I won't be coming back to all of this. 

LWJ: I love you; I'm probably going to have to fight you; your funeral is going to be so upsetting

Wei Wuxian turns away from everyone, and you can see the weight settling on his shoulders, as he contemplates the choices he just made and the choices that are still ahead of him. 

Jin Guangshan, for the first and only time, loses his temper in front of everybody, literally flipping a table because he's so mad about what just happened. 

Art prompt: Jiang Cheng wearing an outfit made of a Chinese mythical creature. Bonus points if it’s a qilin. Bonus bonus points if Zhang Qiling (from DMBJ/Lost Tomb franchise) is standing next to him looking grumpy while Jiang Cheng wears an outfit made from a qilin. 

Soundtrack: Get This Party Started by Pink, Charm Attack by Leona Naess, Let’s Go Crazy by Prince. 

[eternally-writing]

tour troubles | jjk

genre: fluff, angst

rating: G (no swearing or sexual content)

pairing: Jungkook x reader

theme: idol!au, boyfriend!au, one-shot

word count: 1.8k

warnings: none

Synopsis: When surprising your boyfriend Jungkook on tour doesn’t quite go as you planned, it’s up to you now to help cheer him up.

banner by me!

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

After a grueling 6 months apart,  you were more than happy to be in MetLife Stadium watching your boyfriend live out his dreams on stage. The Map of the Soul Tour was no joke; Jungkook was practicing all day and performing all night, and combined with your final exam season passing by it left little time for you to talk to each other.

Finally wrapping up the school year, you got in touch with Jimin to see if he could help you plan a surprise visit for Jungkook on one of their final tour stops.

All of the members had become like family to you, but it's no secret that aside from Jungkook you are closest with Jimin. He was like the older brother you never had, and you always ran to him whenever you needed relationship advice or a good hug.

As you watched Jungkook on stage you noticed his smile falter sometimes as he would be slightly out of position or dance off beat. You could only pick this out because you had spent hours in the practice room dancing with Jungkook. 

You and Jungkook had come together because of your shared love for dance. He had first asked you out inside a very sweaty-scented Big Hit practice room, almost half of your dates ended with some form of dancing, and whenever one of you was frustrated you could always find the other teary-eyed, lying on the marley floor of a dance studio. You had always been there to whisper words of encouragement in his ear when he was feeling down, and you wished nothing more than for her voice to reach the stage at the moment.

Soon enough, the concert came to an end and you were flashing her pass to the backstage security guard to get to see the boys. Despite your  uneasy feeling watching the concert, you couldn't ease the butterflies in your stomach at seeing your boyfriend for the first time in months.

Ever since you had planned this, you spent your nights imagining exactly how Jungkook would react: whether he would hug and kiss you first, stay frozen on the spot in shock, or start crying right away. 

As you stepped into the Big Hit dressing room, you were instantly greeted with several smiling faces. 

I didn't take you long to do a head count and realize that there were only 6  boys standing in front of you, and that your boyfriend was nowhere to be found. 

Making eye contact with Jimin, you saw the softness in his eyes as he motioned for you to come closer so he could explain. 

“He’s not feeling well Y/N, and none of us can get him to talk about it. We’re so worried. I swear I’ve only gotten like 2 words out of him tonight, and I even tried to make a nutella sandwich for him to cheer him up. I’m sorry this isn’t what you had planned, but can you talk to him please? For us?” 

You took a deep breath before pulling back the curtain divider in the dressing room. Your nerves catching up to you, you considered just turning around and telling the boys you would surprise him at their next concert instead. 

You had dealt with Jungkook being troubled and frustrated more times than you could count, but you were worried you had lost her touch after being apart from him for months. 

Your mind also flew the other way. How many times has he felt like this after a concert and never told you? When he said "It was fun I'm just really tired now" after every concert was he truly feeling like this? 

With that, you pushed forward because you knew that you had to be there to support Jungkook today, even if you couldn't be there for all the other times. 

The sight that greeted you behind the curtain was not a pretty one. 

Jungkook was staring blankly at the monitor in front of him, dark fringes of his hair matted against his sweaty forehead, tour hoodie zipped up completely with the hood on, and worst of all, his eyes were clearly puffy and swollen, with tinges of red coming through from underneath his makeup. 

Jungkook barely even glanced your way as you sat down an ample distance away from Jungkook on the couch. It was clear from his lack of surprise at your appearance that one of the boys (probably Jimin) had probably told him about your surprise visit earlier in an effort to cheer him up after the concert, but even that could not get him out of this slump.

 Of all the scenarios you came up with for how Jungkook would react to your surprise, somehow this one never crossed your mind. 

You turned your focus to where Jungkook was staring - a TV monitor replaying video footage from tonight's concert. You watched as his eyebrows stayed furrowed as he glared disapprovingly at himself for making even the smallest of mistakes in the video, almost wincing as the TV monitor continued to play the footage.

"Do you want me to help point out things in the video?"

Jungkook didn’t even move a muscle.

You took the silence as a yes, and pulled a pen and the closest thing you could find to paper, a napkin, out of your purse to write on. 

Working as a dance teacher had taught you more than a couple tricks about how to give constructive feedback, and you were a firm believer in the "give 2 compliments and then 1 thing to work on" approach. However, you knew the issue with Jungkook wasn't that he was truly bad at dancing, but rather that he was way too hard on himself for the smallest details that the audience wouldn't even notice - so she threw in a few more compliments than usual. Unsure of how Jungkook would react to seeing the list, you still threw some of those very nit-picky details on there, knowing that if he was still frustrated he would throw the list out all together if he thought you were just coddling him. 

And so you both sat together in front of that grainy TV monitor, in complete silence aside from the sound of your pen scratching against the napkin.

June 10, 2020 MOTS:7 Tour Feedback Report for Jeon Jungkook ( by Y/N)

- match angle of arm placement in Black Swan Opening Choreo

- footwork on DNA ending choreo could be cleaned up 

- the ARMY at the corner of the screen during Euphoria had the biggest smile when you looked at her. I think she’s gonna remember that moment for the rest of her life. 

-  I like the way you wink at the camera during So What! Gave me butterflies babe. 

- could add more energy into the last Fake love chorus ( hot bod btw!!)

And the list kept going on and on as you diligently focused on the screen and writing notes, taking occasional glances at your silent boyfriend.

Upon glancing over your shoulder and seeing your list, Jungkook smiled at your thoughtful and sweet comments. 

All of sudden, a wave of consciousness and realization washed over him. 

He finally has the girl he loves in front of him again after months apart, and instead of cherishing his limited time with you he was spending it watching himself dance, which is what he had already spent the last 9 years of his life doing. Most of all, you never let your smile falter once in front of him, even though he knew you may be upset with his response to your surprise, and you went along with whatever he wanted to do - even if that meant watching a very very low-quality video of his performances on a loop. 

Grabbing the napkin gently out of her hands and placing it on the table, Jungkook cupped your face and looked gently into your eyes. 

"Thank you",  he said softly, as if not wanting to startle you with his sudden character change.

In your head there was absolutely no need for Jungkook to be thanking her for anything she was doing.  She knew dating an idol would have its challenges, and she made a promise to Jungkook that she would be by his side through it all, even if that included rewatching Euphoria on loop. 

It was now your turn to sigh. 

“There’s nothing to thank me for babe, it’s just me. I wanna be here for you when you’re like this - I didn’t just date you so I could be there to celebrate your Billboard #1s and daesang sweeps, I’m here for these moments too.”

Jungkook further eliminated the space between you both by wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest. In that moment he realized that maybe all he needed was you. That all these hurdles he had been facing alone would have been much easier if he had just let you in on his problems.

“I just feel bad Y/N, I haven’t even seen you for months and the first time I see you I’m like this? I’m sorry.”

The gears started turning in your head. Batting your eyes overdramatically at your boyfriend, you smiled. 

“Okay how about we make a deal then babe?”

Jungkook looked at you curiously and let you carry on. 

“From now on, every time you feel like this you come to me okay? We can figure this out together, but I can’t help you if you don’t let me in,” you expressed, grabbing his hands in yours.

“Also, if you felt like making it up to me you could buy me some ice cream? It’s not the same when I eat it without you,” you joked.

Jungkook’s melodic laugh vibrated through the room. 

“Just ice cream? You’re selling yourself short babe. I’d buy the whole world for you, my love.”

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡-- 

As you emerged from behind the curtained section of the dressing room, hand in hand with a smiley Jungkook ( a stark comparison from how he was a mere hour early), you were greeted with Jimin jumping up and cheering loudly upon seeing the maknae.

Unable to contain his excitement, Jimin ran towards the two of you, chiming “you did it Y/N!! You brought back our maknae!”  

“Good to see you smiling, Jungkookie,”  beamed Jimin as he stepped forward to ruffle Jungkook’s hair. 

Jungkook chuckled and looked up at his hyungs. 

“I think I owe you all some ice cream. Ready to go? It’ll be treat.”

If his hyungs weren’t already excited to see Jungkook feeling like himself, now they were ecstatic. And you definitely felt the same way as well. ♡

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡-- 

If you liked this, please interact/follow! Thank you for reading ♡

- Emily

[woodface]

In the past week, I’ve rewatched season 1 of Motherland: Fort Salem as I wanted to get a refresher before diving into the new season. I’m just amazed to have a character like Sarah Alder grace our screens now. Her character is so ambiguous and there are so many themes we usually mostly see for male characters. It’s a delight the way this show turns gender roles upside down.

I’m intrigued to see where this season is going to take her. I can see it going both ways and I honestly don’t know which I would prefer. Okay, maybe I do have a slight preference, but I won’t be mad if it takes the other route anyway because it’s just amazing character development. 

I love how she teeters on the edge of being a villain while at the same time also seemingly truly caring for everyone who is put in her charge and acting out of a sense of doing the right thing. She’s the tragic hero who compromises time and again, making sacrifices for the better good until it becomes unclear if she’s still a hero at all given the number of sacrifices she made along the way. She’s selfless and selfish all at once, and I am thoroughly enjoying the duality of her character.

We’ve seen several glimpses on how the Salem Accord came to. It’s clear that the Salem witch trials were putting everyone she knew and held dear in danger. She lost her sister and who knows who else, and in the end, she made a deal with the devil. She vowed to protect her country in exchange for the lives of all the witches.

I wonder how many witches there were at that time. If the matrilines we see now all begin at Salem or whether Alder made that deal for witches she didn’t even know. Or was she always in charge? She was portrayed as a very young girl in the play we saw, around the age of the new recruits really.

She tied her life to those that hated her, that wanted her kind destroyed, and she tied the lives of everyone else as well. Even this first act is ambiguous as we have no idea whether all other witches were on board with this plan or not. We do know that she did it to save her own live and that of those around her and in that moment she sealed the fate of all her kindred.

A deal with the devil. To save their lives, but also to risk it for those that would have killed them all. I can imagine that in that moment, the military she created felt like family. It was us against them, hoping to buy approval and create a world where they could be safe. She put the weight of the world on her shoulders and the entire future of all the witches suddenly depended on her getting them through.

I wonder if she realised how much wars would follow after, or if she thought that it’d be the end after this one conflict. No way anyone could stand up against them, especially not civilians without any witchcraft. Only one war leads to a next and she watches the families she wanted to protect lay down their lives. She extends her own life, has people who willingly give her their life energy so she can continue the conflict. So she can continue the fight. 

Except the fight never ends and she makes comprises. Just like she did with the Salem Accord. She spent 300 years making sacrifices and feeling responsible for this world she created. Power corrupts, and it probably corrupted Alder just as much. One compromise leading to another, all for good reasons. A whole line of good intentions leading her further and further down the path. First the Camarilla, then the Spree. A reason to keep fighting and she has to see it through. She started it all, didn’t she?

I can imagine that Alder carries a lot of guilt with her. That over 300 years, she might even have forgotten some of the awful things she had to do, but I also think that she truly believes she’s doing the right thing. That she means it when she greets each new batch of recruits and sees them as her daughters. Her legacy. She is responsible for them being there, she is responsible for how they might die fighting for her. 

And aside from that, after 300 years, she truly believes that she’s the only one who can see them true. She has to be, right? After all, she’s had young witches give up their life force to keep her going. If she can’t fix it, then their sacrifice was meaningless. She’s come this far, she’s compromised so much, to turn back now and give up the reigns of control is not an option. 

Her connection with the Biddies intrigues me. Even in S1 we see her truly caring for them and I can’t imagine that’s a lie. She is tied to them so deeply, shared thoughts and memories. I wonder if it’s also her connection to the world. Through each new person she binds to, she sees a new generation and cares for a new generation. 

It’s so intriguing watching the impact this bond has on Tally. Tally was so ready to rebel against Alder when she realised that Alder sacrifices those hostages and Tally is the moral compass of this entire show. To have her suddenly do a 180 is interesting because now she’s seeing into Alder’s mind and she’s seen her intentions and she understands it.

Now, it’s not surprising because people will justify their actions even to themselves. Alder is the most unreliable narrator to her own history, but I do think that Tally saw something good in her and wants to believe in her.

Which leads me to wonder where they’re taking this. Tally exploring Alder’s memories is not going to end well either way. Nikte seems to be the founder of the Spree and I imagine that whatever Alder did to push her to such extreme measures won’t be pretty. 

I really hope that whatever influence Alder is now having on Tally, that it works in both ways. I would love to see Alder having to re-evaluate her actions seeing them through Tally’s eyes. The moment where this jaded character who made so many compromises she doesn’t know herself anymore, sees herself mirrored in the eyes of this young soul who she is now bound to and wants to be better. 

On the other hand, I fear this might just end with them turning Alder into a true villain, but I hope not. I love the complexity in this character so much and I like to believe that she cares. That she cares deeply for each recruit and each life lost, and that it’s that amount of caring that has her stuck where she is. And I would love that to be the reason that she stops, that she realises she can’t compromise more and that Tally becomes the compass she lost so many lifetimes ago.

[morporkian-cryptid]

So.

I've rewatched The Times, alone, calmly, with some time on my hands and my screenshot button ready and a notepad open, so here's the coherent(ish) post I said I'd make.

By the way, massive thank you to everyone who's posting and reblogging screenshots and gifsets and yelling in the tags. Fandom hype is half the fun, and I love y'all so much.

In my first watch I was surprised they got caught in the first place. Actually, they really could have escaped arrest if they wanted, Lupin points it out, and Jigen says he didn’t feel like “getting serious on a bunch of flying donkeyhockeys”, he just didn’t feel like wasting bullets on a bunch of fucking drones. When they end up in jail, it's usually just because they're too lazy to fight back lol

---

Goemon is done with this bullshit. Lupin is about to unleash The Mayhem TM. Jigen is just... Hat.

---

You know, the thing about Lupin’s voice getting deeper when he’s serious? Like, when he's putting down his mask? He did that in jail when Jigen said he was quitting.

---

“Times may change, but there’s no excuse to abandon your partner!!” granted, Goemon was talking about the Magnum and not Lupin, but the double meaning was voluntary

---

“For a guy who’s usually quiet, you’re really shouting your mouth off today!” BECAUSE HE DOESN’T WANT TO LOSE YOU JIGEN

---

It's been a running theory in the fandom for a while apparently, and there’s a high chance the Fiat indeed belongs to Jigen: he took it with him when he (tried to) quit.

---

“BECAUSE IT MAKES MY DRINK TASTE BETTER” the whole bar scene is a call back to Blood Seal Eternal Mermaid (that one scene on the beach where Lupin asks Jigen why he keeps going on adventures with him); or at least to that euphemism that’s probably been used several times; Jigen’s whiskey is supposed to be top of the line but it doesn’t taste like it, Zenigata tells him he can find good booze anywhere else even in this bar, and there’s a call back to that scene later when he’s with Goemon.

---

Also, I just think it's adorable how Jigen challenged Goemon to a drinking contest, and Goemon immediately went "sure bro but YOU'RE GONNA LOSE"

---

Also the fact that Goemon was ready to throw hands with Jigen if Jigen actually tried to quit. Then throw hands with Lupin when Lup didn't do anything to stop Jigen. Goe wants to keep his cowboy. (I love these two's dynamic so much kqkaosdklls)

---

Here, have way too many screenshots of Zenigata from an episode that's about Jigen (I have my priorities straight).

“You owe me one, and I’m not going to forget it.” I’m not either, Jigen owes Zenigata a drink, that's going straight to the trivia notebook, and if it doesn’t come up again later I will riot.

"Off duty" my ass.

---

“I sure as hell won’t go without claiming my fair share” so by the time he came back to Lup and co, it was already explicit that it was a final goodbye party. Which. Technically. Was already the second time he said “goodbye this is the last time you’re never gonna see me again.” Jigen you ain’t fooling anyone

(in my first watch I didn't catch that one line, and I thought he was pretending to come back but actually kinda doing a secret goodbye, in the sense that he knew this was goodbye and they didn't)

---

Jigen: I'm going to shoot a peanut while completely drunk!

Goemon:

---

Lupin and Jigen: -fighting over food like children-

Goemon:

HE LOVES THEM. HE LOVES THEM SO MUCH. THEY'RE IDIOTS AND THEY'RE HIS IDIOTS

--- “We’ve been together for a pretty damn long time. And I’ve never for one second regretted it.” “Are you talking about Lupin, or your Magnum?” “Take a guess.”

And I’ve never for one second regretted it.

Excuse me while I go scream into a pillow.

---

I fucking slammed my hands on my desk SO HARD

---

Tumblr is unfortunately not letting me add more screenshots, so I'm just going to keep them for my screenshot blog. They're mostly the ones that everybody is already mass-reblogging (you know the ones).

---

I also want to talk about the green jacket, but that's gonna be an whole independent post.

---

Also, I want to underline again that I (and I know I'm far from the only one) went into this fully expecting this episode to hurt like a bitch, that the whole point of the episode was to be a tribute to Kiyoshi Kobayashi and his fifty years of voicing Jigen, to reflect on the amazing time Lupin and Jigen had together, and be sad about him leaving.

And they took that idea and did the exact opposite.

It's not about anyone leaving. It's about Jigen staying.

It's about him staying and about all the years and adventures to come. This is a new era, and they're all adapting, but it's still Jigen, it's still Lupin. Kiyoshi Kobayashi is leaving but he's still Jigen, in a sense. You can't take away these fifty years, and everything Kobayashi brought to this character, and yes the franchise is changing, it has changed SO MUCH over the years; but that's the trademark of Lupin III, as a person, as a character and as a story. It changes, it adapts to its times. No matter the times, it's still, at its core, five people who care about each other immensely and would go to the end of the world for each other. And nothing's ever going to change that.