#as in i'm back tmrw. rn i need to sleep

[silvermeww]

i am finally free of the worst two weeks of my semester (i think) (so far) YIPPEEE!!!! the downside is that i ghosted one group on a not-mandatory group presentation so come tmrw morning i have to find a place to hide at 8am on campus ;w;

[butchdykeorpheus]

.

[fairlyang]

Easy money I 🕷️

in which your roomie needs your help for a shoot

w/c: 3.1K

pairing: pornstaroomie!miguel x f!reader

tags: 18+ smut. tension, recording, groping, fingering, squirting

notes: all my readers loved this series and might’ve been peer pressured for a part 3 but I’m kinda excited to write it :D gonna post this rn and maybe part 2 tmrw, finish up all my part 3’s soon hopefully

part two

I heard a knock on my door so I lowered my music from my airpods. "Come in!" I yell and turn to look at my laptop.

I hear the door open and Miguel clears his throat, I turn around to look at him and raise an eyebrow, "what's up?"

"I need something from you...." He says and takes a step inside.

"Like what?" I ask and he takes another step forward.

"You're gonna have to hear me out alright?" He says and I narrow my eyes at him.

"Okay..." I say and take my airpods off leaving them on my desk before turning back to look at him, giving him my full attention.

"I need you to step in for tonight's shoot..." he says and I burst out laughing.

"Are you fucking joking?" I say and shake my head. Is this man serious?

"I need your help Y/n..." he says nearing the edge of my bed and I groan.

"Why me?"

"The girl I was gonna shoot with canceled on me last minute and all the girls I usually shoot with are unavailable." He explains and I blink.

"Andddd you are already here...." He adds and i scoff.

"Not really sure I'd wanna expose myself like that Miguel." I say and stand up, walking over to my bed and plop down on it.

He sighs and sits on the edge of it and looks at me with pleading eyes. "Please? For me?"

"And the camera would hide your face, so unless you have any noticeable tattoos on your lower body then I think you'd be in the clear." He says and I bite my lip. Well there lies the problem...

I blink looking at him in silence making him scoff as he widens his eyes slightly then his lips tug into a smirk. "Where do you have it?" he asks and I feel my face heat up.

"Uh that one spot that's like lower, inner hip..." I say quietly and turn my gaze to my window.

There was really no reason for me to be acting like this- but that tattoo wasn't exactly somewhere that most people in my life know.... So maybe... just maybe...

"No face?" I ask and he nods.

"You know I don't even show my face-" he says with a small smile.

"I know but I don't know if it's different for the girls you record with." I say and shrug.

"It depends on them mainly, I'm not gonna force anyone I work with to show their face if they don't want to." He says softly and I nod slowly.

"And you wanna do this like right now?" I ask and he nods again.

"Jesus-" I mutter and run a hand over my hair.

"Up to you but you know I have a lot of loyal subscribers and make decent money off this..." he says and I chuckle.

"Because the girls love your voice and body." I say and he smirks making me regret my choice of words. And queue to him being obnoxious about it...

"I-"

"Think so huh?" he teases in a cocky tone making me groan.

"Fuck off." I say and grab a random stuffed animal from my bed and throw it at his face.

He laughs and holds it, it was so small compared to his hands. Oh god-

I mean of fucking course I've noticed how fine he is- it was the first thing I noticed when I was interviewing people to be my roommate, he was the hottest man that came in needing a place to stay.

I didn't just decide on him because he was hot but because he seemed chill and not like someone that would murder me in my sleep.

But I never made a move on him, neither did he. We've just always had some type of tension that neither of us ever paid attention to... I guess until now..

"So what exactly did you plan to shoot?" I ask and let out a sigh.

He grins and scoots closer now sitting by my legs as they were stretched out. "I was thinking fingering."

I nod and bite my lip, "hmm.."

"Up to you I won't force you but just think of the fact that you'd be getting paid to get fingered." He says and I snicker.

Sounds like easy money...

And I'd get an orgasm out of it...

"50% of whatever the video makes will go to you." He says and I bite my lip.

"You're really laying it on thick there Miguel... you that desperate?" I tease and he playfully rolls his eyes.

"Yeah actually, so just let me know within the next hour before I just decide to do a solo vid." He says and stands up.

I sigh and nod, "I'll... think about it...." He smirks and gives me a wink before opening the door and walking out, closing it behind him.

I sigh and lay down on my bed, should I?

I mean there's no denying the fact that I always listen in when he has someone over to record... or even checked out a few of his videos on pornhub...

maybe even possibly masturbated to a few of his audios... or the ones where he fucks himself with a fleshlight...

Letting out those incredible moans for everyone's very own pleasure, how selfless.

But he wanted to record for onlyfans which was for the ones who specifically pay to view his content, which apparently was a lot and the thought alone was a little nerve wrecking.

What if someone I've been with before recognized my tattoo and tells people I know? I'd be fucking done for and I'd just die on the spot of pure embarrassment.

But the money- how could I say no to that kind of money? Especially when seeing the views just his previews on pornhub get-

I'd be so fucking stupid to pass this opportunity...

Fuck it.

I get up from my bed and walk to my door quickly opening it before stepping out onto the hallway. I then do the walk of shame and walk to Miguel's room.

I made my mind up a little too fast god I'm not gonna hear the end of this from him-

I step in front of his door and knock twice before hearing a laugh. I groan and cross my arms across my chest, patiently waiting for him.

He opens the door with a wide smile but before I could even say a word my eyes trailed down his chest then to his abdomen. A small happy trail going down caught my eye as a pair of grey sweatpants hugged his hips perfectly.

God he looked so good...

Wait- how the fuck did he change so fast?

"Did you just assume I was going to say yes?" I ask, quickly looking up at him.

He shrugs and opens his door wide, motioning for me to step inside. I roll my eyes but walk in nonetheless, seeing that he was indeed very desperate for this. And apparently eager.

"I knew it'd be something hard for you to say no to." He says and shrugs, closing the door behind him.

"And I had an idea for more anonymity..." he says and walks past me.

He walks over to his desk and picks up two masks, robber masks. "We could put these on." He says and throws me a pink one.

I catch it and look down at it, cute.

"Just casually had these huh?" I mutter and play with it between my fingertips.

It only had three holes, obviously for the eyes and mouth. It honestly didn't shock me too much that he had these especially considering he didn't make content showing his face at all.

"Alright ready?"

"Where are we doing this? Should I change? Should I put makeup on-"

"Calm down-" he says and laughs, shaking his head at my sudden worries.

"We're doing this in my bathroom, I already set the camera and lights up." He explains and I nod.

"As for your clothes if you want I can give you one of my shirts and you can just leave your panties on." He says looking me up and down.

I wearing a SZA shirt with Cookie Monster pajama pants.... Yeah I definitely could've changed but maybe got a tiny bit excited..

He walked over to his dresser and picked the first one of top and then tossed it over to me. I caught it and unfold it to reveal a Nirvana tee. I shrug and walk over to his bathroom with him right on my tail.

I walk in then stop and quickly turn around to point a finger at him, "you're waiting- you can wait a few more minutes there O'Hara." He chuckles and backs up letting me close the door.

I quickly take off my tee shirt and put the one he gave me on. I leave my shirt on the sink then I slip out of my pj pants and realize it wasn't a big deal if he watched because he was going to see it all right now anyway.....

I look in the mirror and take a deep breath, I was really going to do this.... We were really going to do this...

I then take notice of the ring light and tripod that were right in front me. This was getting so real so fast and it was making me more nervous than I expected.

I breathe in then breathe out. I do it a couple more times and feel some nerves leave my body but some still lingering around.

I turn around and walk towards the door, I open it wide and Miguel stands up from his bed and walks over. "Finally." He teased and I chuckle.

"My bad." I mutter, turning back around and walk to the sink, leaning against it as Miguel walks in.

"You're good, don't worry it'll be fine." He reassured and gives me a small smile.

He walks over to his tripod and sets his phone on it and goes to the camera. He turns to me and motions for me to stand in front of the camera. I nod and do so, leaning against the seat with my nerves growing every second.

"Alright we're gonna start, if you need me to stop at any given moment just tap my thigh or anywhere twice okay?" He says and I nod.

"Audibly please?" He says and I chuckle.

"Yes I understand."

"Okay good." He says and throws me the pink robber mask.

I move all my hair to my back then slip it on. I fix the holes to align to my mouth and eyes then see Miguel doing the same. "This'll be fun." He mutters with a slight smirk on his face then he presses the button to record.

He walks over to me and gently puts his hands on my cheeks then leans in. I lean up and he leans down removing the last amount of space between us and crashes his lips onto mine. I kiss back and put a hand to his jaw and the other on his neck.

I then feel his hands slide down my body, at first staying at my waist, gripping my skin softly through the shirt until his hands go lower and his fingertips are playing with the hem of his shirt, near my ass.

He slid his tongue in my mouth and continues toying w his shirt, bringing it up slowly as our tongues fight for dominance but I stood no chance. Suddenly I feel a hard smack against my ass making me moan in his mouth.

He smiles and pulls away just to go down and start leaving open mouthed kisses on my neck. I sigh and tilt my head to the side as he slightly moves the mask to leave a mark where he wanted. He sucked on my skin then licked it softly before leaving a kiss on it.

I smile and grab his head, making sure he stayed in place as he kept playing with the skirt. He pulls away again and this time bringing the hem of the shirt up, slowly. He turns me around slowly so my behind is what the camera will see and lifts the shirt completely over my ass.

Another smack.

Then to the other cheek.

Another smack on each one, definitely already making them red and it seemed like he wanted to keep going because of the noises that were leaving his mouth. Such delicious groans.

He keeps pulling it up, exposing my entire bare back to the camera but my tits to him. He quickly brings it up and over my head, throwing it on the floor then quickly cups my tits and squeezes.

I gasp when he pinches both nipples then quickly turns me around so my ass was on his already hard bulge. His hands continue squeezing and I felt purely at bliss, heaven on earth even.

I lay my head back against his chest which makes him lean down and leave a kiss on my neck then suck gently on the skin as his hands continued kneading my tits.

His right hand then lets go of my boob and slowly trails down my stomach, as if easing me in, making me feel comfortable first. I grab on to his left arm and try to stand still, I already felt like I was going to go crazy and maybe fall over.

My fucking roommate was doing this- and he had such a good hand for these things so this was gonna be perfect.

His hand goes between my legs, gently rubbing my pussy through my panties. I spread my legs to help him out when he starts rubbing circles on my clit. I moan and buck my hips forward, already wanting more.

And he gives me just that, he starts going faster and I could feel my wetness seeping through the fabric of my little panties. "Miguel-"

He hums then rubs along my slit, my arousal already able to soak his fingers. How embarrassing.

He then removed his fingers making me whine until he pulls my panties down and lets them slide off my legs. I step out of them and kick them farther out, out of shot.

I spread my legs again and he doesn't hesitate to immediately start rubbing my clit again, not caring to ease me in anymore. He moans into my ear and dips his fingers on to my folds, my wetness enveloping them as he teases my hole making me grip harder onto his arm.

He moved that arm to grip on to my waist while I still held on to it for dear life. I couldn't trust myself to stand I knew I'd just end up falling and he was a big boy, he could handle me.

He then slid a finger in, slow at first until he slammed it in without warning. I gasped and clung on to his arm. He then started pumping in and out, deep and slow.

He started going faster, hitting deeper now until he fully stopped and added a second finger in. He started moving again, going faster and harder, making me a moaning mess as I looked down to watch in awe.

"Look how easy you're taking me baby." He murmurs in my ear and I couldn't help the whimper that came out of me.

"Feels so good-" I moan and he hums, pumping them even faster.

I felt myself clench against his fingers and listen to how fucking soaked I am, he barely even touched me..

"Rub your clit for me." He whispers and I nod, immediately bringing my right hand down to rub my clit in fast circles.

I moan out for him and he coos dirty little nothings into my ear as he starts curling his fingers up and hitting that sweet spot every time.

I was starting to feel my orgasm creep in already which had me shocked but then realized who was the one doing this to me...

"Fuck- Miguel-" I moan and lay my head back against him, he leans down to kiss my cheek oh so sweetly.

He then brings his open hand and starts pinching my left nipple, I felt my legs shake as he continued and I was slowly down because I was feeling so fucking close.

"Don't stop baby, be a good girl and keep rubbing that clit until you cum for me sweet girl." He murmurs and I whimper, clenching against his fingers as I rub my clit faster feeling that knot in my stomach about to burst.

"Miguel please- so cl-"

I dig my nails into his arms making him groan but he didn't say to stop. I felt my eyes growing hazier by the second and my thighs were trembling more and more by the second.

Suddenly I see white, I cry out and feel my climax crash and take over my body. I closed my eyes and almost fell to my knees, had Miguel strong arm not held me. My legs were trembling and Miguel's fingers were still inside, slowly fucking me through my orgasm.

I held onto him for dear life and start to calm my breathing down as I open my eyes, then quickly widening in pure shock, I had squirted all over the place.

I gasp and move my hand away from my clit, I stood silent, still in Miguel's arms in pure embarrassment. Squirting always felt so embarrassing, especially now because I didn't even mean to-

"That was probably the most perfect shoot I've done thus far." Miguel says making me scoff.

"I'm being so serious." He says finally taking his fingers out of me slowly and brings it up to his lips.

I tilt my head and look up, watching as he sucks on his fingers covered in my juices. Holy fuck.

I blink watching him as if in a trance, then he looks me directly in my eyes making me subconsciously squeeze my thighs together.

He takes them out with a plop and gives me a wide grin, "sorry but we have to do that again in the future...."

I laugh and look down embarrassed, I shrug and straighten up, "I guess we'll have to see if the people liked it..."

"I'm sure they will." He says and laughs.

"Let's get ya cleaned up then maybe we can watch a movie, if you'd like." He suggests and I look up at him and nod.

"That'd be perfect."

[planets-for-her]

RANT/VENT!!

im gonna tweak so bad school's been so bad but so good. I wanna sob every day and I'm not sleeping enough and can't focus enough to study but even when I study I can't do it enough so I end up getting lower grades off the bat but also I love seeing my friends and I love when its fun and we have discussions but im SO DONE and SO TIRED. I started getting anxiety symptoms without the mental anxiety (cold sweats, shaking, risen irritability, nausea, just being an emotion wreck in general) but then the intrusive thoughts and need to do things to neutralize the thoughts came back (and so suddenly and strongly I was bordering on anxiety attacks and having rlly bad symptoms) and im doing worse on tests and I can't sleep through the night and im so confused and so upset. I can't even see my therapist and i havent seen her for MONTHS. guys this is like 12 of my straws im literally just not going tmrw i cant do it rn. I feel so pathetic like I'm told to do basic tasks and literally wanna stop existing like excuse me what is this omg??

im tweaking out and I can't even imagine having a good birthday or anything good without immense stress and worry about literally existing or not existing I hate this

[pinkshadesofshame]

so nothing special has really been goin on just was feelin really down physically and emotionally

I think I only mentioned this to a moot but I've been having a lot of numbness and pain in my hands which was just making work h e l l + the usual work life drama which just made me feel worthless lol but I finally went to the doctor nd definitely have carpal tunnel 💀 I'm on an anti inflammatory and need to get some kind of brace to sleep in but just the meds have helped noticeably vvv thankful for that

aside from just how physically demanding my job is my boss has just been on some dumb shit so im trying out part time before throwing in the towel. hoping decreasing my work schedule will help with thw pain + building my routine back and being happier

I'm going to nashville tmrw to see mr peck again at his rodeo I'm taking a break from packing rn lmfao but I'm so excited!!! this has fr been the only thing getting me through this month I'm excited to party and feel a littlw normal again!

[slytherinshua]

yeah its currently 10pm and i wanna go back to sleep but i'm scared I won't be able to like 💔 music is my thankfully what helps me relax, esp relaxing-ish songs!

ugh i love reading tws stories/headcanons but theirs NOT ENOUGH 💔 and I feel like ppl are scared the write for kyungmin which I honestly understand but tooth rotting fluff for kyungmin would cure my depression 😭

- 🪩

awww :(( insomnia is the worst... i hope you'll be able to tho :( and yess music will hopefully help you relax <333 lmk if you need any recs for soft songs!!! i'm writing rn and once i'm done i'm gonna go to sleep too cause i'm gonna play tennis at 6 am tmrw LMAO

ikr :(( like i do get it and im happy ppl aren't like adults writing for kyungmin but its also a little sad cause there's nothing for him but i will be writing some full length fics for him eventually im ngl the only fic i had for him in my drafts was angst oops BUT IF U HAVE ANY FIC IDEAS FOR HIM DEF DROP THEM OTHERWISE ILL THINK OF SOMETHING EVENTUALLY FOR SURE <333

[elytrafemme]

sometimes days r just shit and thinking about positive things can’t quite shake it off and u sometimes just gotta coast thru the day doing what u can getting up to grab water get fruit open blinds go outside, take care of urself, til u sleep and a new day starts. and i think that is ok. i should not be so adverse to feeling shitty out of fear of not having an instant fix. sometimes things suck. nd that is ok. we are all strong enough to get through that much and there r so many happier days to await

[fauxastrology]

.

[luvhrs]

shadow and bone — ep 3 thoughts:

(might have to stop here and continue tmrw after i finish this stupid stats hw 😤)

rapunzel!alina with all the light imagery in that dream

suddenly i'm watching bridgerton

i like this ginger lady miss safin can they be besties

whoaaa a tailor??? how many kinds of grisha are there :o

sAGGING TITSJDKFJDJ

kaz seems pretty adamant on the sun summoner not existing 👀 i wonder why

pretty nina~ yo now that i think abt it the extent of heartrenders' powers must be p wide tho couldn't they also just. stop someone's heart from beating in a snap

cool cinematography again!! (is that even what it's called) why is jesper eating the random biscuit(?) 😭😭😭

money money money. ain't it funny. in a rich man's world

god i'm sorry there's gonna be a lot of jester loving on here he is just. So Very Attractive and i am So Very Weak

andddd he took a detour to gamble 💀

kirigan appearing out of nowhere bcs ~shadow~ also this silhouette shot is very nice

oh my i wonder how she'll show her power. let's go exalted council

me to kirigan if i were in alina's place: [rihanna voice] what's wrong with me? why do i feel like this?

how did alina do that??? did kirigan cause that somehow??? bcs shadow needing light or vice versa or whatever but either way i'm excited to see her fight and awaken more of her power aaAAA

"you were perfect" silco haunts me. anw kirigan is very sus to me rn this feels like his plan wASN'T THAT TOO EASY

uhhhh ok sudden hostility from zoya 😐

KAZ HOLDING A GOAT IS THE BEST THING I'VE SEEN TODAY

ooh look man of progress poster (i'm just making arcane and DA references now lmao sorry)

"hope is dangerous. it clouds your judgment." sounding a lot like "emotions always screw everything up." kaz and hank ik y'all are just 2 big softies

oh no nina's still in trouble!!

convenient ominous giant train!!

GODDAMMIT JESPER

YO THIS IS SO INTERESTING I FEEL LIKE I'M ON A FIELD TRIP BUT WITH MY LIFE ON THE LINE

MAL WE MISS YOU LOVER BOY :(

OOOO ALINA A FIGHTER U GO GIRL

ok zoya has the hots for kirigan the "she's in good hands" thing /was/ in jealousy (also yeah nadya(?) me too ngl hahsjdjdd)

stag again??? what if these are her memories coming back to her 😳

bet kirigan's lurking (haha get it) in this library somewhere. oh wait that's the spiritual adviser. he's a bit creepy 😭

i absolutely love how many kinds of grisha there are!!!!! feels like pokemon. i gotta know them all

as a burnt out gifted child with nothing left of my gift now but a desire for academic validation, i like baghra bcs if she were my mentor she's the type i'd want to impress. and she's pretty

OMG SHE REMINDS ME OF FLEMETH!!! I AUTOMATICALLY LOVE HER MORE NOW

THIS TRAIN RIDE GIVES ME SO MUCH ANXIETY. THE COALLLL

oh i just noticed the grisha's uniform design depending on their power i'm BLIND

are these all the grisha existing rn or no? there are less than i expected

bro go easy on alina can i order an adjustment period 😭😭😭

JESPER ACTUALLY HUGGING THE GOAT IN RESIGNATION I'M CRIGNGJFNF

WTF JESPER COOL MOMENT??? HELLO????? MF MY SISTER IS SLEEPING BESIDE ME I CAN'T GO FERAL RNDJIEDIIJE

he's so fucking cool ohmygod you guys and if i repeat this scene all night

but also he shifted his weight fuck what's gonna happen???

THE SHOT OF THE GUN. OH MY FUCKING GOD. THAT'S SO FUCKING COOL WHAT. WHAT. IS HE ONE OF THOSE SHARPSHOOTERS???

THE SHARPSHOOTING IS COOL AF YES BUT HEAR ME OUT: HE WAS HOLDING. THE GOAT. THE ENTIRE TIME.

he is forming a lifelong bond with that goat i bet that being said i would like your hand in marriage sir

also jesper's actor giving us everything??? (also everyone else rly goddamn i hope the other charas get cool solo sequences like this too!!!) wHEW that GAZE at the beginning and then after everything seamlessly transitioning back into the funny clever persona 🤌🤌🤌

THESE BITCHES ACTUALLY MADE IT THRU. HOLY SHIT THAT DESERVES A STANDING OVATION

yo i rly love alina's letter to mal tho... idk there's smth so human abt it. it's abt the perpetual "i can go anywhere i want, just not home" feeling!!! it's abt the self-discovery and finding your place in this world!!! how it's a universal experience and yet every person goes thru it uniquely, not to mention blindly. smth hopeful in knowing that even the most powerful person in the world probably struggles with their identity

"you have always been my true north, mal." BITCH I'M 😭😭😭😭😭 that is the sweetest thing ever girlie dON'T U DARE CHOOSE KIRIGAN OVER MAL I SWEAR TO THE SAINTS

[kimnjss]

I HAVE AN 8AM TMRW AND ITS ALMOST 1AM PST BUT WE HAVE A LOT TO UNPACK HERE. okay so FIRST.. when you said yoongi was gonna leave early i did NOT THINK YOU MEANT SOPE THREESOME AKSNSKXNXK. WHEN I TELL YOU I WAS FREAKING OUT- PLS WRITE A DRABBLE ON THAT EVENTUALLY

watching yn sleep with jimin was like watching my best friend go back to her ex i was like YES YES BUT NO NO. would also like to include that its TRUE.. jimin and yn are so good tgt but obviously like not rn when they still have problems to get over. BUT even though i'm team independent-yn-who-doesnt-need-a-man i was like ' ugh when they get back tgt its gonna be so cute ' THE ENTIRE TIME. how did you manage to create such a lovable character (jm) who i also wanna 🤜🏼 so badly ?? </3

AND oH MY- THE JK AND TAE JEALOUSY BIT !!! i felt soo bad when he was getting nervous bc of the girl jeongguk was talking to but LET ME TELL YOU- PROBABLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE PARTS OF THIS CHAPTER. THW ANGST. THE THREE WAY CHAOS GOING ON WITH LIKE EVERY CHARACTER PAIRING (minus namjin bc wholesome honeymoon angels). it was like i was watching a showdown but angst angst angst and i loved every bit of it!!

LMAO. I HAD TO BE VAGUE FOR THAT ONE  BC THAT’S LITERALLY THE ONLY SUCCESS OF THE NIGHT. LIKE THEY WENT IN, KNEW WHAT THEY WANT AND WENT FOR IT. WHEN I SAY HOSEOK GETS SHIT DONE, I MEAN IT!!

they were only able to be like that bc they were drunk/high. so the problems that they had didn’t seem to matter in the moment, they were able to just be them. and the moment it was wearing off, everything came rushing back for yn. hopefully when they’re finally able to work through their problems and have a proper discussion about what down in the past two years, they’ll be able to be all in love and happy like we all know they should be.

OH MY GOD. IT’S AN ABOSLUTE MESS. all of them lowkey knew that it was messy bc taehyung definitely wouldn’t have walked over if he saw the girl sitting there beforehand, but he was already there and they were so close and poor baby just wants his gukkie :( but he’s too stubborn and jeongguk is just like yn ., ugh it’s a mess . they all need a group meeting at this point.

[proteuscirce]

Ok so update

I didnt do the apush notes but hey, I'm not going to class tmrw so it's fine. Instead i worked on our apush culture project and wrote up my code. I consider my culture project as notes since it's on what I'm studying so I'm pretty ok with that. The language will have to wait. I'm still working on getting myself back on schedule.

I'm going to bed now (it's like 00:06 rn). I always try to get my lovely 6 hrs of sleep but sometimes (like today) it's a little less. I already have lunch made for tmrw and only need ab 10 min to make breakfast. I just need to get, yk, out of bed in the morning.

I shall update again tmrw. In the meantime, heres a rly late update of my bujo weekly (plus random filters bc I'm bored):

[bambisgirl]

OMG IT WAS 3 AM FOR ME TOO 😭😭 i slept for 3h im literally a zombie rn <///3

pls me too, I am half-asleep in my online english class :((( I hope you get to sleep soon!

ahhh adina you're too sweet 🥺🤍 it's actually my fault for not getting them like i was clueless (╥﹏╥) i didn't know until last month that you can level up talents like... 😀 i've been casually playing genshin for 8-9 months?? but i've only started being hardcore ab it in january?? & learned all of the stuff then JODDJKS PLS IM EMBARRASSED (im a pro player now tho 😎)

YOU DON'T NEED TO BE EMBARASSED <//3 genshin is all about having fun, not being a pro-player <3 also you're really sweet too! I can't wait to play with you soon haha :)

OOO I SEE I SEE!!! im keeping my guaranteed for ayato so i feel you 😭😭 i've literally wanted xiao since the first time i saw him but also kazuha??? PLSSS I LOVE THEM SM 😭😭 watch me start writing for genshin besides enha too </3

SO YOU'RE GOING TO BE AN AYATO HAVER <3333 I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU! he literally looks so amazing?? his ult is going to be OP, fr. he's practically hydro ganyu <3 and I totally agree with you writing for genshin 'cause that's what I've been doing too on my anime/genshin side acc LMAO, though lately I've been inactive there :(((

THE NON INTENDED CHONGYUN PUN NAUR KKGHKSJSKS??? i was so happy to see you mained keqing too, shes such a nice girl </3 AND PLEASE COR LAPIS IS LITERALLY MY BIGGEST FEAR 😩😩

I'M SORRY OK DJHWAJDGBASDJ. she's the best girl <33 I love her so much that I spent all my money to get her battlepass weapon twice AND her gorgeous skin bcs I couldn't help myself :(( NO COR LAPIS ANYMORE PLS

AHHH im excited about the new tavern event!! it's really cute as i've seen so far 🥺 i haven't had any time to complete it yet but i'll def do it today or tmrw hehehe 🥰🥰 have you completed it yet?? AND I TOTALLY AGREE UGH i swear enkanomyia became my 2nd biggest fear after cor lapis ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

I finished all the events and I'm just sitting here like- back to my daily grind for artefacts :( but it's so fun! it's actually so cute and the stories are also really interesting! plus I got to see kaeya after such a long while, I missed his flirty/teasing remarks lmao <//3 take your time with completing it though! PLUS, lots of primogems. that's all you need to know <333

I'm probably going to fall asleep now 'cause I'm half-dead, but I will come back to talk to you when I wake up <33 don't forget to also rest when you can please :((

ahhh adina 🥺💗 i actually did sleep a lot hehe, thank god 😭😭 i hope you did too <333

PLEASE YOU'RE THE SWEETEST EVER IM 😭😭 im so so excited for ayato, he rly is hydro ganyu which makes me sooo happy <//3 i didnt get any time to play these days so im definitely going to spend the whole weekend catching up 😌😌 CANT WAIT :D

OMG KEQING'S BATTLEPASS WEAPON?? i should do that do 🥺🥺 i only got the skin like ugh i literally love her so much <///3 she's the prettiest girlie 🥺💗

AHHH KAEYA WAS MY FIRST CRUSH IN GENSHIN 😭😭 i still love him sm, now that you said you met him again im so excited to see him too!! ♡ i really miss him a lot ;; LIKE?? HES SO FLIRTY FOR WHAT?? (not complaining tho)

i hope you rested a lot & that you're taking care of yourself!! 🥺🥺💗💗

[messyliferip]

so…. 2/9 finals done

i honestly dont even know what to say.... like it was okay??? i didn't study enough ofc like i was literally passing out as i was studying like i would be reading my slides, fall asleep, wake up forty minutes later, read more, fall asleep for two hours, wake up and study and LOOP literally from 1am-8am thats all i was doing just breaking my neck. ngl I didn't have the coagulation factors memorized, all the ranges for cbc and csf were meshing together, totally forget everything i took for esr and just like idk i was a mess. and i literally took the test 60Qs in an hour and im just lost.... like i have no idea how I did. like literally no clue. Im pretty sure i passed the class tho, esp cause my attendance was good and then i passed the midterm. still worried tho.

I have an engagement ament party this friday that I would LOVE to go to but that means I need to study my butt off cause I have my anatomy lab final this sunday. It was initially on saturday but THANK GOD it was pushed back. I'm just terrfied tho like there's literally sooooooo much and i;m sooooo bad at anatomy idek why??? i used to be obssesed with anatomy but now im just tired. its so freaking dense and its head and neck AND lower limb + back like tfffff. its literally everything from the beginning of the semester.... Im so scared like I don't have the leg or the foot memorized at all... im studying back rn for just the anatomy class and it doesnt seem that back but im worried about all the muscles. and then i freaking hate head and neck like just shoot me ughhh i hate my antomy professor and the anatomy lab prof is get this..... WORSE HAH. so yea.... im struggling. finals are soooo soon and im so behind i made a semi study plan and hopefully i can stay on track cause i dont want to be fail :'|

anyways I have a geentics research paper which I need to turn in tuesday. so im going to start on that today, probably just read about the subject a bit, finish studying anatomy and review some physiology and then sleep and try and wake up supppperrrr early so i can get an early start cause tmrw i have no college.

[diary-iguess]

wahppn

J: nothing bad it was just really hot and i changed clothes twice

wake up 7 o clock for my interview, eat one piece a bread and some orange juice

ace di interview

dem tell me fi fill out the application twice

some yout try sell me a jelly candy

it cant open, but eventually does

Monique forwards

i meet her friend in the painting studio and we go get a box lunch

i sit down and eat the food

im sweating my life away

R: pepper?

J: before meeting the hustling yout, i left my portfolio in the hr office so mi did have to go back for it

no it's just hot af inna kingston

and i was wearing a long sleeve shirt

Paige seh him nah fwd fi di shoot

Thevrtistisjvmvicvn is sitting next to me, but i'm talking more than he

me a wonda how he can go school in full business attire and not become a puddle of sweat

Yanah appears and asks if she can have something nutritious

on campus

like a shake

Juice immediately says no dawg

Juice is working on a mythological drawing, but the paper he's using is trash and i tell him so

he says something about how it will still sharpen his skills and i said he needs watercolor paper if he's going to mix it with watercolor

is my story interesting?

i'm interested in telling a good story

R: I'm more interested in your friend's names

J: thevrtistisjvmvicvn said he wants to be a curator, but hasn't curated any shows yet

i tell him do that shit

lmao

R: Thevrtistisjvmvicvn, Yanah, Monique and Juice

I actually fucking love Juice

Now i know there are places I can't say that out loud

J: i ask my father if he can pick me up because Paige nah forward

he replies hmm

lmao have you seen the film?

my phone is dying and i have no credit because the tuck shop only selling $500 credit today

*back to the story*

i'm telling you this from my laptop

R: What parent says "hmmm"? was this a text?

J: yes

i knowwww

like

can't even K me

wtf

my shoes too big for me, so i stand on them instead of wearing them for a bit

Juice is playing music on his phone and one of the songs is from frank ocean's second project that he released the same time as blonde

my mind is blown

R: That must be some song

J: Yanah returns from the tuck shop with water still disappointed that there is no health food available

more mindblowing that he released two projects at once

i tell theartistisja that i like doing projects with many layers of meaning and process

i talk about my ananse storybook thesis and how i want everyone to know ananse is a deity and amina blackwood meeks taught me that

i say something like "yea, she's rad"

i talk about how the first time i met easton lee, i believed someone when they joked that he was 100 years old

and hoped that he didnt remember when i asked him if it was true

im dying laughing rn

my cousin invites me to sit and do work together at starbucks later

my father sends me a message "M is here, please call her through K-dollasign"

R: googled Easton Lee

J: lmao what did you find? he and my grandmother are friends

they're both legendary chinese-jamaicans

R: I can see he's definitely chinese-jamaican

J: yes and so is my grandma lol

R: author, poet

not bad

1931

J: but no doubt their swagger is enwrapped in their proximity to afro-jamaicanness

wow he's 87 this year

or 86?

M is my grandmother

i message K-dollasign

"i heard grandma M is here"

he replies "makes sense"

but intonates that he was not previously informed

i try to decode my father's message and K-dollasigns response

"makes sense"

he must be referring to Shutterbug's wedding

the same one i wasn't sure i was invited to

R: LOL

wow

are you going?

J: wait nuh man

R: lol

J: okay so i reach home, turn on my laptop

charge my phone

i frantically whatsapp my relatives

fb message uncle Macbook to get in touch w grandma

i try to search the internet for clues as to when this wedding will be

my sister says i should just ask Shutterbug if i can come

so i do that

uncle Macbook replies me with a different number to call, i call, get grandma

she says "no, no, no, you can't come to the wedding, the guests have already been counted and there's too many"

my heart sinks

i say, okay, well i can still see you today?

my cousin Carlton who wants to go to starbucks has arrived at my house

R: woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow

J: i try to devise a plan with Carlton and grandma and my dad all talking at once to pick grandma up and she says something about not wanting to be stranded and i say we would never let that happen to her

the phone isn't working very well and at some point my father has the phone

i return to my whatsapp messages on the laptop and Shutterbug has replied!

"hey, we were overcapacity a few months ago, but there's some space now. if you can make it on sunday, please come"

i tell grandma what she said

"okay, but how are you getting there? and where are you going to stay?"

i had not thought of this second part

the wedding is in mobay

R: MUFUFUFUFU

on a beach

duh

just sleep on the beach and get dressed in someones room in the morrow

J: i quickly say "aunty Rose's"

and she has already said she's very busy today and the plan to see me nah work out

"see you in mobay then!"

okay bye grandma, i love you!

"i love you too sweetheart"

now i have to whatsapp aunty Rose and see if she will shelter me

and K-dollasign to see if i can drive with him

R: funny at points but not a bad day

J: Carlton still deh yah a try reach liguanea fi get some food

the story did not get resolved yet

lol

it wasnt a bad day just long af

R: wait what

J: let me try summarize

R: Well I mean, between Yanah's Healthy snack Crisis and the Wedding Snafu, I thought the day was sealed with you tryna get aunty Rose

J: I was also supposed to meet Pearl at starbucks for 3pm

when Carlton and i pull up to starbucks, Rose a walk up deh too

synchronicity

R: 'the hell? Starbucks is a spot now?

J: that's the culture of the company

im like baffled as to both my grandmother and father asking me if starbucks is an appropriate place to link and do work together

that's how they've been selling the place for at least the last ten years

i order a tall strawberry and cream frappe w coconut milk and Carlton is very excited to get a pumpkin spice frappe, no latte because he doesn't want to burn his tongue

yesterday Pearl showed me a video she edited featuring this black guy with ginger hair, Souffrant

Souffrant appears before us in starbucks and sits at our table

i'm supposed to edit my own video with Pearl's color correction advice, but i'm still trying to figure out my travel situation

before we went to starbucks, we walked to tastees and my mom replied to my frantic messages about grandma and the wedding with "ur not paying attention to what i tell u"

there's like a whole thing where i'm trying to get my cousin Jazz's number to ask if i can go from kingston to mobay with him because K-dollasign is unavailable.

aunty Rose says of course i can stay with her and of course she has Jazz's number

resolve dat, so mi have a place to stay and a drive

there are several unrelated phone calls that need to be made but mi still nah no credit, so i borrow Souffrant's phone

then the next chapter is me, Carlton, and Pearl trying to walk to sov after i finally finish editing my video.

i take some really dope shots of the sunset

pause for incoming illustration

R: i mean

sure

make hay

all of the birds with 1 stone

J: -picture of sov-

R: this is sov

dark

but its sov

J: it's the golden sunset reflecting off the walls

then we all go to kfc and then i try look for some shoes to wear to the wedding, but then mi nuh even know if it's really a beach ting, but never fear, my likkle sister is here to whatsapp me the link to the wedding info website the couple set up!

it's a garden brunch affair ting

so we think to go to lee's instead of payless and when we reach back in fronta payless di people dem close

so now i will go to the thrift store tmrw to cop a whole new fit from the dress to the shoes.

when i reach home my father is going to the airport and grandma (dad's mom, not the one i was tryna see earlier) asks me to come with them which i would have done anyway.

driving back from the airport, grandma's bajan soca music continues to play in the car, but it seems louder now without dad's voice. i try to talk to grandma about herself. i ask about high school. she says, "do you expect me to remember 50 years ago"

i'm like yes of course

she said

"well

i was head girl"

of course! i say

and she was also in charge of sports such as running

the drive back home is very slow because grandma cant really see in the dark

when we finally reach home and i lay inna mi bed, mi wonda why mi so tiyad

and now i know why

thanks for tuning in, this has been an appreciation for the life we live, by Jeana like jeans pants

totes forgot the best part where K-dollasign pulled up on Carlton and me in traffic when we walked back to the plaza to get to the car

then another man pulled up on us and Carlton cuss me jokingly bout how i know everyone and we probably see someone else weh mi know

#fabulous

R: like bloodcleet jeans pants

yea, cause clearly you're a superstar

beer people, links and visits

J: