#as if this were the twilight zone or something

[msklassickilla]

Delirious | J. Uso|R. Reigns Four

Summary: When Titania buys an old typewriter from a closing thrift store, she thinks it’s just a vintage gem—until the words she types start coming true. However, the typewriter doesn’t just bring fantasies to life—it twists them. Giving Titania way more than she bargained for.

Pairing: Titania Marshall (Black OC) x Jey Uso x Roman Reigns

Author’s Note: This story is another AU thing. So, it might align, or it might not. I will try my best to keep it current enough. Nonetheless, it’s mash up of a few things: That one episode of Goosebumps. That one episode of the Twilight Zone. And that movie by the same title, Delirious featuring John Candy. I’ma make it work. Plus, I like mystical spooky shit with a bit of Jerry Springer type mess.

Warning(s): Will be updated each chapter. None for this.

Disclaimer: This work of art is fictional in nature including the original characters created by me. I do not own any of the existing characters or lyrics from songs referenced in this story (if any). All rights belong to their respective owners with the exception of my original characters. This work is purely for entertainment purposes and is not intended to cause harm.

Four

The familiar opening riff of Monday Night Raw’s theme music filled the living room as Titania and Mia settled onto the couch, surrounded by the remnants of their takeout dinner. Titania hugged a pillow to her chest, trying to ignore the gnawing ache in her stomach.

She wasn’t sure why she’d agreed to watch tonight. Maybe part of her was hoping Jey wouldn’t appear on the screen. Maybe she could convince herself that he wasn’t real—that the typewriter hadn’t worked as seamlessly as it seemed.

But then Jey's music hit.

Titania’s breath caught in her throat as the crowd erupted, their cheers mingling with a smattering of voices. Jey strode down the arena steps, dressed in his ring gear, his expression lax and confident. He didn’t need anyone else by his side anymore—Roman, Jimmy, and Paul Heyman were all on SmackDown, and while Sami Zayn was somewhere backstage, this moment belonged to Jey alone.

He paused once he was standing on one post of the ring, soaking in the energy of the crowd. The camera zoomed in on his face, highlighting the determination in his eyes, and Titania’s pulse quickened.

“Whew,” Mia said, nudging Titania’s arm. “Your man looks good tonight. And you’re telling me you don’t swoon every time he comes out?”

Titania forced a small smile, her chest tightening. “Yeah. He does.”

As Jey made his way to the ring, the commentators hyped up the tension between him and Bron Breakker, who had made his presence known in just a short time since being drafted.

“This match is about more than just wins and losses,” Wade Barrett said. “This is a statement. Jey Uso has something to prove—not just to Bron Breakker, but to the entire Bloodline he came from.”

The arena lights dimmed, and Bron’s music hit, the crowd erupting in a mix of cheers and boos as he stormed down the ramp, his confidence radiating off him in waves. Titania gripped the pillow tighter as the tension in the air grew palpable.

Mia leaned forward; her eyes glued to the screen. “Oh, this is gonna be good. You think Jey’s gonna take him down?”

“Of course,” Titania said, her voice quieter than she intended.

The bell rang, and the match began with an explosive start. Jey darted around the ring with his usual quickness, his strikes landing with precision, but Bron’s raw power gave him the upper hand early on. The two men exchanged punishing blows, each one trying to assert dominance.

Titania’s heart raced as she watched Jey struggle against Bron’s relentless offense. For a moment, it felt like he might lose, but then Jey shifted the momentum with a perfectly timed counter, sending Bron crashing into the turnbuckle. The crowd roared as Jey followed up with a thunderous superkick that nearly took Bron’s head off.

“Your man’s on fire!” Mia said, throwing a fist in the air.

Titania smiled faintly, but her mind was elsewhere. Seeing Jey like this—strong, confident, larger than life—should have made her proud. But instead, it made the distance between them feel unbearable. He was out there living his life, thriving in his world, while she was here, watching from the sidelines.

As the match wore on, Jey landed his finisher—a devastating Uso Splash from the top rope—and pinned Bron for the victory. The crowd erupted, the announcer declaring Jey the winner as his music blasted through the arena.

“He’s so good,” Mia said, shaking her head. “How are you not screaming this from the rooftops? If I were you, I’d have matching shirts made by now.”

Titania forced a laugh, but her chest ached. She wanted to see him, to feel his presence, to remind herself that he wasn’t just some untouchable star on her screen.

Later that night, after Mia had gone to bed, Titania sat alone in the dimly lit living room, staring blankly at the TV. The house felt oppressively quiet, the absence of Jey’s presence weighing heavily on her.

Her gaze drifted toward the stairs. She could feel the pull of the typewriter even from here, its promise whispering in the back of her mind.

She shook her head, running a hand through her hair. “Don’t,” she muttered to herself. “You don’t need to.”

But the ache in her chest didn’t subside.

The next morning, Titania stood at the front door, watching as Mia hauled her overnight bag to the car. The crisp morning air carried the faint scent of dew, and the sky was a soft, cloudless blue.

“Sure, you don’t wanna stay a little longer?” Titania asked, half-hoping Mia would change her mind.

“Nah, I’ve gotta get back to reality,” Mia said, slinging her bag into the back seat. “But don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. I have to check up on you, after all—you’re terrible at keeping me in the loop.”

Titania laughed softly, though it felt hollow. “I’ll try to do better.”

“You better,” Mia teased, pulling her into a hug. “And tell your man I said hi. Next time, I expect to actually see him.”

Titania froze for a fraction of a second, then hugged Mia back tightly, forcing a smile. “I will.”

As Mia drove off, Titania stood in the driveway, watching her car disappear down the street. The morning felt too quiet now, the silence pressing against her chest. She exhaled slowly and went back inside, shutting the door behind her.

The house was eerily still. For the first time in days, she was completely alone, and the weight of it was suffocating.

She tried to distract herself with chores—folding laundry, reorganizing the bookshelf in the living room, even scrubbing the bathroom sink again—but none of it helped. Her mind kept drifting back to the typewriter, the thought of its power gnawing at her like an itch she couldn’t scratch.

She hadn’t heard from Jey since she’d seen him on Monday Night Raw. No texts, no calls, nothing. She knew he was busy, knew this was probably normal for him, but the silence felt unbearable.

By late afternoon, Titania found herself pacing the living room, her thoughts swirling.

It’s fine, she told herself. He’ll come home when he can. You don’t need to interfere.

But the ache in her chest didn’t go away.

That evening, she sat on the couch with a bowl of cereal, aimlessly flipping through channels on the TV. The house felt emptier than ever, the silence so loud it was almost oppressive.

Her gaze drifted toward the stairs.

----

Half an hour later, Titania was sitting in the spare room, the typewriter in front of her.

Her hands hovered over the keys, trembling slightly. She’d promised herself she wouldn’t use it again. She’d promised.

But the longing in her chest outweighed the guilt. She wanted to see Jey. She wanted to feel his presence in the house again, to hear his voice and see his smile.

“It’s just one line,” she whispered to herself, as if saying it aloud might make it true. “One harmless line.”

Her fingers moved almost without her permission, typing the words:

Jey came home in the middle of the night, and by the time I woke up, he was already making breakfast

She stared at the sentence, her pulse pounding in her ears. For a moment, she thought about ripping the paper from the typewriter and throwing it away. But she didn’t.

Instead, she pressed the final key and sat back, the weight of what she’d done settling over her like a heavy blanket.

“It’s fine,” she murmured. “It’s fine. Just this once.”

But as she left the room and climbed into bed, a knot of guilt twisted in her stomach. She tried to ignore it, telling herself that she wasn’t doing anything wrong.

Still, the typewriter’s pull lingered in the back of her mind, whispering promises of control and ease that she couldn’t quite shake.

The faint scent of coffee and the sizzle of something cooking woke Titania before her alarm did. Her eyes fluttered open, and for a moment, she thought she was dreaming. The warm, comforting smells wafted up the stairs, blending with the quiet clatter of plates and pans.

Her heart skipped a beat.

She swung her legs out of bed, barely bothering to throw on her robe before padding down the stairs. As she reached the kitchen, the scene stopped her in her tracks.

Jey stood at the stove, flipping pancakes with one hand and sipping coffee from a mug in the other. He was wearing a fitted black T-shirt and sweatpants, his damp curls sitting nicely on the top of his head. His every movement was casual, comfortable, as if he’d been doing this every morning he was there for years.

“Morning, babe,” he said, flashing her a grin. “Hope you’re hungry. I went a little overboard.”

Titania’s gaze shifted to the counter, where a stack of golden-brown pancakes sat next to a bowl of fresh-cut fruit and a jar of syrup. Her chest tightened as a wave of guilt washed over her.

“I... didn’t know you’d be home,” she said softly, her voice catching slightly.

Jey chuckled, setting the spatula down and turning to face her. “What, you thought I’d stay gone forever? Tampa was cool, but it’s good to be home.”

Titania forced a smile, wrapping her arms around herself. “You should’ve told me you were coming back.”

“Wanted to surprise you,” Jey said, stepping closer. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead, his lips warm and familiar. “Figured I owed you some uninterrupted me and you time after being on the road so much.”

Titania’s breath caught, but she nodded, her smile tightening. “Thanks.”

Jey turned back to the stove, his tone light. “Go sit down. I’ll bring you a plate. You look like you could use some food.”

She obeyed, sinking into one of the kitchen chairs as her mind spun. He was here, just as she’d written it. His presence was seamless, his affection so genuine it made her chest ache.

When he brought her a plate, she muttered a quiet “thank you” and started eating, though every bite tasted bittersweet. Jey filled the silence with stories from his trip, casually mentioning meetings with the creative team and bumping into some of the NXT talent while in Tampa.

“Oh, and Bron tried to give me some attitude backstage after our match,” Jey said, shaking his head with a smirk. “Kid’s got potential, but he’s still wet behind the ears. Thinks he’s hot stuff just ‘cause he’s got a few wins or whatever.”

Titania blinked, her fork pausing midair. “You talked to Bron?”

“Yeah, nothing serious,” Jey said with a shrug. “Just put him in his place a little. You know how it is.”

She nodded absently, her heart thudding. He was talking about things she hadn’t written—things that had happened off-camera, in moments she hadn’t controlled.

Jey leaned against the counter, crossing his arms as he studied her. “You good? You quiet this morning.”

“I’m good,” Titania said quickly, forcing another smile. “Just a bit sleepy still.”

He nodded, though his expression was still laced with concern. “Well, eat up. You’ve got me all day, so no excuses for staying cooped up in here. I’m taking you out later.”

Her stomach flipped. “Out? Where?”

“You’ll see,” he said with a grin, finishing his coffee. “Just be ready by five.”

Titania nodded again, her pulse quickening. The idea of spending the day with him was thrilling—and terrifying. She’d wanted this, hadn’t she? To have him here, to be with him?

So why did it feel like she was sinking deeper into something she couldn’t escape?

Titania barely had time to overthink Jey’s plans before five o’clock rolled around. He kept the details vague, offering only a playful smirk when she pestered him for clues. By the time she stepped outside to join him, she was greeted with the sight of his black SUV parked in the driveway, its engine softly purring.

Jey leaned casually against the driver’s side door, dressed in a nice shirt and shorts. His dark curls framed his face, and his grin was boyish as he opened the passenger door for her.

“Hop in,” he said. “You trust me, right?”

Titania raised an eyebrow, her heart fluttering as she slid into the seat. “Do I have a choice?”

“Not really,” Jey teased, closing the door before circling around to the driver’s side.

The car ride was a mix of banter and comfortable silence. Jey flipped through the playlist on his phone, landing on a mix of R&B and hip-hop that made the car feel warm and alive. Titania found herself relaxing despite the constant hum of anxiety in the back of her mind.

After a short drive, Jey pulled into a secluded park, the golden hues of the setting sun casting a soft glow over the trees. He parked near a small lake, where a picnic table sat under a cluster of willow trees.

Titania blinked in surprise as she noticed the cooler in the back seat. “You planned this?”

“Of course,” Jey said, grabbing the cooler and a blanket. “Thought you’d like a quiet spot. No crowds, no noise—just us.”

The simplicity of it caught her off guard. For someone who lived his life under bright lights and deafening arenas, this moment felt oddly intimate.

----

They spent the next hour lounging by the lake, eating sandwiches Jey had packed and laughing about everything from the ridiculous fan signs he’d seen at shows to Mia’s over-the-top commentary from the last time she visited.

“Man, she’s got jokes,” Jey said, shaking his head. “She said you ‘landed me’ like it’s a wrestling move. What’s that about?”

Titania chuckled nervously. “She’s just... Mia. She never stops teasing me.”

“Well, she’s not wrong,” Jey said, grinning. “But you didn’t land me. I landed you.”

The statement caught her off guard, and her cheeks burned as she looked away. “You’re full of it.”

“Not even,” Jey said, leaning back on his elbows. “Look at you. Smart, talented, gorgeous... I’d be an idiot not to make you mine.”

Titania’s heart skipped, his words hitting her harder than she expected. She stared at the rippling water, her mind racing.

“Besides,” Jey continued, his tone softening, “this life can be... a lot. Sometimes it feels like everyone wants a piece of me. But with you, it’s different. It’s just... easy. I don’t have to perform. I can just be myself.”

Titania’s breath caught. She glanced at him, and the vulnerability in his expression made her chest ache. For a moment, the typewriter felt like a distant memory.

“You don’t have to perform with me,” she said quietly. “Ever.”

Jey smiled, his gaze warm as he reached over to squeeze her hand. “I know.”

----

Later that night, back at home, Titania sat on the couch as Jey sprawled next to her, his head resting lazily against her lap. They were watching a movie—something forgettable that neither of them was paying attention to.

Jey shifted slightly, his voice low as he said, “You know my next show’s in Richmond, right? It’s only like, what, an hour away from here?”

Titania’s eyes widened. “Really?”

“Yeah. You should come,” he said, glancing up at her with a grin. “I want you to see me in action, live. It’s way better than watching on TV.”

Her chest filled with a mix of excitement and nerves. She nodded slowly, a smile tugging at her lips. “I’d love to.”

“Good,” Jey said, leaning back into her lap with a satisfied sigh. “You’re gonna love it. I’ll make sure of it.”

Titania ran her fingers absentmindedly through his hair as he settled in, her thoughts drifting. The day had been perfect—everything she could have wanted and more.

But as the movie played on, her mind wandered back to the spare room, where the typewriter sat waiting. She couldn’t help but wonder if she could make their time together even better, smoother, more perfect.

The temptation was there, whispering in the back of her mind, and it scared her.

The house was quiet again, the kind of deep stillness that made Titania’s thoughts louder than they had any right to be. She stood at the sink, washing the last of the dinner plates as Jey’s laughter echoed faintly in her mind. He had gone to bed early, tired from their day together, leaving Titania alone with her thoughts.

The night had been perfect. Too perfect.

She dried her hands and leaned against the counter, staring blankly at the kitchen window. The reflection of the darkened room stared back at her, and she felt the pull of the typewriter growing stronger with each passing second.

Titania had promised herself she wouldn’t use it again, but the day’s events had rekindled a familiar desire—the need for control, for assurance that nothing could go wrong. Jey’s invitation to his show in Richmond thrilled her, but it also made her stomach churn with nerves.

What if she embarrassed herself? What if she said or did something that didn’t fit into the seamless narrative the typewriter had created?

What if she wasn’t enough?

Her gaze drifted toward the stairs, and she clenched her fists, willing herself to stay put. She didn’t need the typewriter. Jey was already here, wasn’t he? He was real, tangible, warm. She didn’t need to rewrite anything.

But the nagging voice in the back of her mind wouldn’t let go.

----

A little past midnight, Titania found herself standing in front of the spare room. She hadn’t even realized her feet had carried her there until her hand was on the doorknob, the cool metal sending a shiver up her spine.

The room smelled faintly of dust and paper, the air thick with the presence of the typewriter. It sat on the desk, gleaming under the faint light of the hallway, like it had been waiting for her.

Titania stepped inside, her heart pounding as she shut the door behind her. She hesitated for a moment, staring at the machine as if it might spring to life on its own.

“You don’t need this,” she whispered, but her voice sounded hollow even to her own ears.

Her fingers brushed over the keys, the smooth metal cool against her skin. She told herself she was just looking, just thinking. But the familiar weight of the typewriter pulled her in, its promise of perfection wrapping around her like a velvet chain.

The notebook she used for her fanfiction ideas sat nearby, its pages filled with notes, sketches, and stray thoughts. She flipped through it absently, her mind swirling. Maybe she could write something small, something harmless—just to ensure the day of the Richmond show went smoothly.

No, she thought, slamming the notebook shut. This is dangerous. You know it is.

She pushed back from the desk, her breath shallow, and stared at the typewriter like it was a living thing. The temptation was suffocating, its pull relentless.

With shaking hands, Titania turned off the light and left the room, shutting the door behind her. She stood in the hallway for a moment, leaning against the wall, her chest heaving.

It wasn’t over. She knew it wasn’t.

Titania didn’t sleep well that night. She tossed and turned, her dreams a tangled mess of flashing arena lights, cheering crowds, and the rhythmic clatter of typewriter keys.

When morning came, she awoke with the same lingering ache in her chest, her thoughts a jumble of fear and longing.

Jey greeted her with his usual warmth, but even his easy smile couldn’t dispel the storm brewing in her mind. As they sat together over breakfast, laughing and talking about nothing in particular, Titania felt the pull of the typewriter like a shadow at the edge of her thoughts.

It would always be there, she realized, whispering promises of control, tempting her to rewrite the world just a little more.

And deep down, she wasn’t sure she could resist it forever.

----

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Taglist: @theusotwinzcom @yana3sworld @mikaelsonharem7 @isabella-2025 @bebesobrielo @jstarr86 @jeypunkk @usoholic

Want to read from the beginning, click here

[mollysunder]

Looks like Singed is under Noxian custody (top left), which implies that the raid we saw in the teaser and the trailer lead to the widespread capture of multiple Zaunite citizens from multiple factions, including civilians.

And Jinx really is breaking these people out of jail. Jinx probably came for Singed first, but things happen and suddenly she's freeing everybody.

The irony shouldn't be lost on anyone that the most significant thing Jayce and Vi did in Zaun last season was lead a raid where not only were multiple unarmed workers physically assaulted by enforcers and a child was killed, but the civilian workers were still arrested in the end, including the child workers!

Jinx really gets a mural because she's THAT girl!

[britishchick09]

ralph's and an owl slide church in garden grove! ;D

[carefulfears]

omg rm9 was kinda fun To Me. i enjoyed mulder and scully going on a sushi date, scully being SOOOOO embarrassingly down bad for a man she’s known over 20 years, and of course the restaurant attacking them because mulder is a bad tipper. it’s also just nice to see them living life, you know??

i had a blast with rm9 tbh, a classic s11 well! have no idea what happened there! but i enjoyed myself! episode. just talked about it a bit but yes!! just seeing them living life!! literally the majority of s11 isn't even them going on cases they're just like. existing. and falling into Situations. in rm9 all they wanted to do was go to this sushi place. scully is of course always embarrassing as hell but what i loved loved loved loved about her in rm9 (and consequently throughout s11) is that last moment at the diner when they're both on their phones, and she puts hers away and just kinda leans over to his shoulder and takes his hand, and he puts his phone down.

i was so floored to see her do that, to ask for his attention like that. so much of the original series is scully...almost quietly suffocating, sometimes? being on the edge of his myopia and focus? wanting him to see her so bad, and then lashing out (READ: fucking serial killers) to either rebel, or get him to notice? but it's been a long time and he has been many more things to her since and now she just grabs his hand and makes him turn to her. in forehead sweat when she whines that he needs to feed her or she's leaving!! and then she does leave!!! in plus one when they aren't even "back together" yet, and she sneaks into his motel room and asks him to hold her.

scully in the revival has left him. she has struck out on her own, had her own career, lived on her own, been a doctor. and she's back and they're back because there's work to be done, and because, as james wong says: "She’s in love with him that way. She had a different career as a doctor, but she came back, because this is so important to him—she’s coming back to be there for him."

she's back, and they're back, because they're always choosing each other, and they've proven it, and they've done the work. she complains about his stakeouts. she cracks jokes about being sure he's on his meds!! she knows that their son is "guiding" them both, somehow. she doesn't question it.

she's embarrassingly down bad even after 25 years because she's never anything but adored him, but there's so much more availability now. she can openly check him out and invite him back into her room and giggle at him and sleep on his jacket in bars. she used to cry, every single time that he was present with her. she used to be so overwhelmed that she couldn't speak, when he was focused on her. this is the inverse reaction of the stability and peace that mulder has found, there's a steady foundation for scully to grow on.

[maggotmoment]

kinda want to make a kill count list if i rlly do relisten to the suckening. off the top of my head im pretty sure emizel would be highest but idk

[silvcrignis]

Sorry but I’m curious 😂 Why does Pan call Claude a ‘Puppy’

((Okay BEFORE I hand this over to the ginger menace himself. Never. E v e r apologise for asking for more info or just stupid stories about these dumpster children. Those are my favourite things to answer. Anyway. Go on, Penis.))

"Oooooh, I'm SO excited to explain this m'gonna IGNORE that! Well. It's actually kinda a FUNNY story."

"It actually all started with this anime I took to watching on the Isle... Dun really REMEMBER the name of it BUT what I do know is that the main character reminded me ALOT of someone I knew.... Y'see NOT many people REALISE that Puppy has the best nose out of ALL of us! Like even people who walk quietly or fly can't sneak up on him because he can SMELL who's walking up behind him. Also really helpful for TRACKING, which he does do sometimes & YES he does the sniffing thing. He also GROWLS & snarls a LOT, specially when he's frustrated. He has the same like claw fingernails as that character & Puppy whacks Victor the same way the guy from the anime whacks the lil fox guy! & the guy from the anime is like... Part DOG, he's got lil doggy ears on his head. But if you have ever seen Claude Frollo tilt his head & widen his eyes, you understand EXACTLY why I call him “Puppy”. Also he really, REALLY hates it when I call him Frollito so PUPPY is the SAFER option."

[cross-d-a]

So overwhelmed by how much I love s4ep08 “Miniature” of the Twilight Zone. What an incredibly beautiful, sympathetic, human depiction of autism. Much of the episode is upsetting but it feels so representative of how many people interact with and view autism, especially family members and friends who just don’t understand. And Charles Beaumont wrote it in such a way that the viewer is VERY much empathetic towards the main character. And!! The autistic main character has a happy ending!!!!!!!!!!! which I am SO SO!! thrilled about!!! Anyways. I just love it to bits. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt so moved by a Twilight Zone episode. Robert Duvall played the main character so perfectly and I’m immediately going to watch the writer’s other Twilight Zone episodes.

[goryhorroor]

im curious and no I’m serious about the poison apple books, they were so entertaining

[katakaluptastrophy]

The thing about having read our way through two previous books full of necromancers and weird eldritch shenanigans is that the absolute horror of what happens to John as a person doesn't quite register.

John's own glib, matter of fact narration tells the story as an apotheosis. He was doing great. He'd have fixed everything if only people had listened.

But reading between the lines in the John chapters, you glimpse something rather different.

John basically spends the first half of the Jod chapters sitting in the dark with his creepy yellow eyes, not eating or sleeping, literally stroking his favourite corpses and coming out with chill and fun statements about how he can feel their skin when he's away from them and he's 'waking up'. Cool, cool.

Passing swiftly over the cow dome, Presidential Puppet Pals, and the suitcase nuke, day to day life in the cow dome must have been fun... You're all on the Interpol watchlist, the Vatican is asking a lot of questions, the police are outside and John - who hasn't slept in a week and doesn't eat anymore and is probably wearing some kind of weird novelty tshirt - comes wandering past while you're eating breakfast, followed by a dozen silent, dead-eyed corpses like some kind of mother hen. He makes a cow joke, and then zones out because he got distracted by listening to the bacteria in your gut.

And then some guys die accidentally and it turns out he can eat death energy. So now he's got creepy Twilight eyes, an entourage of corpses, a cape, some very dodgy eyeliner, and he's barely breaking a sweat as he instantly kills over 100 people, says it was an accident, and then, dead serious, tells his followers to drag dead UN peacekeepers inside to add to his 'skeleton army'.

By the end, he's not slept or eaten in weeks, is tweaking his own bodily processes on the fly, is puppeting the dead US president and possibly an army of over a hundred corpses, monitoring G- in Melbourne, carrying on at least two conference calls, and helping to build barricades out of chairs.

And I just keep thinking how weird it must have been for his friends. How sometimes he would have seemed like the man they'd known and loved for so long, and sometimes he would seem different. Did they ever find themselves mourning the man he was? Did they ever stand there as he tuned into something they couldn't fathom, staring at them with those yellow eyes, and feel some awful, uncanny valley terror? Did he ever feel like he was losing himself? At what point did the cow jokes stop feeling like oh, classic John and start to be a reminder that his desire for vengeance and the scope of his powers were outstripping his remaining...perspective?...restraint?...humanity?

[onelinerbust]

"I'm going back to my parents with the kids until New Year," Mary said with a resigned sigh, their toddler in her back while the 5 years old Ava gripping her hand

"Are you for real? Babe, the fuck? Why are you so dramatic?" Wes said mid-workout, both of his hands still gripping the dumbbells as if the pump should never stop, even when his marriage is in the brink

"Dramatic? You voted against my body! Against my rights! Against Ava's future! Why do you have to be so selfish?"

"Well, it's not like if I vote differently, the election suddenly went the other direction. Like.....seriously, calm down. You don't see the other wives walk away from their home,"

"This will be the last thing I said to you as your wife so you better listen to this carefully. Imagine not having a say about your own organ, let alone your own body in its totality. You voted for that. And I wish.......there's some kind...of wa-- way that will make you understand t--t--the feeling of losing autonomy....over your own----

*blackout*

Wes immediately realized that something is totally wrong as he witnessed his own self standing over him, building up sweat like crazy as the impostor finished his set. Then, it hits him, he's wearing his wife's clothing.

"Fuck yeah babe, finally, you're awake! Got the kids back inside and decided to do my workout while waiting for you to wake up. How do you feel?"

Wes is in complete disbelief. What on the Twilight Zone is happening here? The comically dreadful situation then quickly turned into a more tense setting as the impostor lowered his voice

"You said none of the wives are as dramatic as I am, right? Threatening to leave home and all that? Well, let's just say, this is the kind of way out the ladies managed to pull off. You're not the first one,"

Wes cannot hide his shock. Is the impostor really saying the truth? Is that why the men were quieter in the neighborhood group chat the past few days? Everything started to make sense, but still, a bodyswap? What kind of witchcraft is this?

"One last thing though. You probably wondered why then the men just accepted their fate and not running around for help. Well, let's just say that once this thick meat plough your new-found hole, you are going to be practically moldable to my whim. I'm definitely going to make you one hell of an obedient stay-at-home-mom devoted to make her husband and family happy, including aligning yourself to all your husband's belief. You will never vote against my wishes, ever again. But let me lift till failure first before I fuck you silly. Enjoy your last few minutes of freedom, babe,"

I think this is my longest story ever. The pictures really triggered something in my mind. Hope you all can enjoy it

[msklassickilla]

Delirious | J. Uso|R. Reigns Six

Summary: When Titania buys an old typewriter from a closing thrift store, she thinks it’s just a vintage gem—until the words she types start coming true. However, the typewriter doesn’t just bring fantasies to life—it twists them. Giving Titania way more than she bargained for.

Pairing: Titania Marshall (Black OC) x Jey Uso x Roman Reigns

Author’s Note: This story is another AU thing. So, it might align, or it might not. I will try my best to keep it current enough. Nonetheless, it’s mash up of a few things: That one episode of Goosebumps. That one episode of the Twilight Zone. And that movie by the same title, Delirious featuring John Candy. I’ma make it work. Plus, I like mystical spooky shit with a bit of Jerry Springer type mess.

Warning(s): Some minor not detailed SMUT

Disclaimer: This work of art is fictional in nature including the original characters created by me. I do not own any of the existing characters or lyrics from songs referenced in this story (if any). All rights belong to their respective owners with the exception of my original characters. This work is purely for entertainment purposes and is not intended to cause harm.

Six

Titania stretched her legs across the couch, laptop balanced on her thighs, the glow of the screen illuminating her face. Jey was still on the road, set to fly back tomorrow, and the house felt unbearably quiet without him.

She had gotten used to his presence—the way his voice filled every empty space, the way his body moved so easily through her world, like he had always belonged there.

Because now, he did.

She had written it that way.

Titania glanced toward the hallway, her eyes lingering on the spare room door. The typewriter was in there, waiting, but she had promised herself she wouldn’t touch it. Not tonight.

Instead, she focused on the document open on her laptop. An outline for a new story—a real one, something she had actually created on her own. But the words weren’t coming.

She sighed, shutting the laptop and tossing it aside. Her gaze drifted back to the spare room door. Her chest tightened. She didn’t need to check. She didn’t need to know. But the pull was there, relentless, a whisper at the back of her mind. Titania stood before she could talk herself out of it, feet moving on their own.

The spare room was still and untouched, the air thick with something unspoken, something unseen. The typewriter sat in its usual place on the desk, the glossy black keys gleaming in the dim light.

At first, Titania felt relief. The last page she had typed was still in the roller, the same words she remembered. But then her eyes drifted lower. There was a new page. A fresh sheet of paper, partially rolled into the typewriter, with a single sentence neatly typed at the top.

A page she hadn’t loaded.

You belong to him now. And he will never let you go.

Her breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t written that. Her hand hovered over the paper, fingers trembling.

The typewriter was changing things on its own.

The realization sent a cold shiver down her spine. Had it always done this? Had it always known what she wanted before she even did? Or worse… was it deciding for her? Titania backed away, her pulse hammering in her ears.

She needed air. She needed Jey.

----

The next evening, Titania stood in front of the bathroom mirror, fixing her hair for what felt like the tenth time. She told herself it was just another night out, just her and Jey, but her reflection told another story.

Her eyes were tired, shadowed with something she didn’t want to name. It wasn’t just that she hadn’t slept well. It was the sentence.

You belong to him now. And he will never let you go.

Her stomach twisted just thinking about it. The typewriter had never done that before. She had always been the one in control. She had written Jey into her life—not the other way around.

Hadn’t she?

A car pulled into the driveway, and Titania jumped at the sound of a door slamming. Jey was home. A strange mix of relief and unease settled over her as she smoothed her dress, forcing a deep breath before heading downstairs. Jey stepped inside like he owned the place. Because now, he did.

He dropped his bag near the door, kicking it aside before looking up at her. The second his eyes met hers, a slow, satisfied grin spread across his lips.

“Damn, ma,” he murmured, closing the distance between them. “You look good enough to keep me home tonight.”

Titania forced a small laugh, but the way he said it— like she was his to keep, to have, to hold forever—made something cold settle in her stomach.

He pulled her in without hesitation, arms solid, unyielding, wrapping around her waist like they belonged there. His lips brushed against her ear as he whispered, “Missed you.”

Titania swallowed hard.

She wanted to melt into him, to let herself believe everything was normal, but the words from the typewriter wouldn’t leave her alone.

She must’ve hesitated too long, because Jey leaned back slightly, studying her.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she said too quickly. “I just—I guess I’m still getting used to all this.”

Jey tilted his head, lips curving into something unreadable. “All what?”

Titania swallowed. “You. Us.”

Jey chuckled, shaking his head as he reached up, tucking a loose curl behind her ear. “Ain’t nothing to get used to, Tee. This is just how it is now.”

Her stomach flipped, and she didn’t know if it was from his touch or the way he said it.

Before she could respond, he took her hand, lacing their fingers together. “Come on. We’re going out. I want you next to me tonight.”

----

The bar had a pool table, dim lighting, and just enough of a crowd to make it comfortable, not chaotic. It was the kind of place Jey had probably been to a hundred times before—so why did it feel like she had been here before, too?

Titania ran her fingers over the edge of the pool table, her skin prickling with an eerie sense of familiarity. She hadn’t written this night. She knew she hadn’t. So why did it feel like she had already lived it?

Jey leaned against the table, chalking the cue stick, watching her. “You ever played before?”

Titania blinked, snapping out of her thoughts. “Uh, yeah. A few times.”

“Bet you suck.” His grin was teasing, his eyes glinting with amusement.

She rolled her eyes, grabbing a stick. “You don’t know that.”

Jey smirked. “Oh, I know, baby. But don’t worry—I’ll be gentle with you.”

Titania shook her head, laughing despite herself. But as she bent down to line up her first shot, a strange chill ran through her.

I’ve done this before.

Not just played pool. Not just had a date like this. This moment. The way Jey stood behind her, his hands grazing her waist. The way his voice dipped lower as he murmured, “Nah, Tee, hold it like this.”

The way he brushed up against her, body heat pressing against her back, breath warm against her ear. It was exact. Too exact. Her grip tightened on the cue stick. Had she written this? Had she rewritten it?

Jey let out a low chuckle, shifting slightly against her. “You keep bending like that, Tee, and I’m gonna forget we’re in public.”

Titania’s breath caught in her throat. That exact phrase. That exact tone, timing, delivery.

Her vision blurred for a second, her heartbeat loud, uneven. She had heard him say that before. But not here. Not like this. She straightened up too quickly, the cue stick nearly slipping from her fingers. Jey frowned, his amusement fading into something more curious.

“You good?”

Titania nodded, forcing a smile. “Yeah. Just, um… just got a little dizzy.”

Jey studied her for a moment before his expression eased again, his smirk returning.

“Alright, baby,” he murmured, stepping closer, boxing her in against the table. His fingers found her wrist, sliding slowly up her arm. “Then maybe we should stop playing games.”

Titania opened her mouth—to say what, she didn’t know—but Jey was already leaning in, claiming her mouth with his. And just like that, the déjà vu was gone.

All she could feel was him.

The ride home was charged, thick with something unspoken, something inevitable.

Jey drove with one hand on the wheel, his other resting on her thigh, fingers warm and possessive as they traced lazy circles over her skin. Every so often, he’d squeeze—just enough to make her pulse quicken, just enough to remind her of what was coming.

Titania stared out the window, her heart pounding against her ribs. She had dreamed about this. All of it. For years, she had imagined moments just like this—Jey wanting her, taking her, looking at her like she was the only thing in the world that mattered.

And now, here it was. Real. Happening. So why did she still feel like she was watching it from a distance?

----

The second they stepped inside, Jey didn’t wait.

The door had barely clicked shut before he was on her, hands gripping her waist, lips crashing down against hers with a force that made her knees buckle. Titania gasped, fingers digging into his shoulders as he backed her against the wall, body heat pressing into her, solid and unyielding.

“You’ve been thinking about this all night, huh?” Jey rasped; his voice lower, darker, rough with need.

Titania barely managed a breath before his mouth was on her neck, teeth grazing, sucking just enough to make her shudder. She had dreamed of this. Jey kissing her like he needed her to breathe. Touching her like he had always known exactly how she wanted to be touched. Now, she didn’t have to dream anymore.

Now, she could feel the heat of his skin, the weight of his hands, the way he was already pulling at the hem of her dress like he couldn’t stand the barrier between them.

Titania let out a sharp breath as he spun her around, pressing her front against the door.

“Jey—”

“You gonna let me have you, Tee?” he murmured against her ear, voice thick with dangerous amusement.

Titania shivered, her fingers flexing against the wood. “I—”

Jey pressed his thigh between hers, holding her there, his breath hot against the side of her neck.

“Tell me.”

Her body arched instinctively, every inch of her tuned to him, drawn to him. She had waited for this for so long.

She exhaled, voice barely above a whisper.

“Yes.”

That was all he needed. Jey grinned against her skin, his hands sliding down her thighs before gripping the back of her dress and pulling it up with one slow, deliberate motion.

“Good girl,” he murmured. “I ain’t taking my time tonight.”

----

Everything blurred after that. It was a mess of hands, mouths, tangled sheets, heat so intense she could barely breathe. Jey was everywhere.

His hands were firm, demanding, claiming every inch of her like he had been starving for her. His body was heavy over hers, his breath hot against her ear as he whispered things that made her skin burn. Titania gave in completely.

She let herself be taken, let herself be owned, let herself feel what it was like to be Jey Uso’s girl. She didn’t think. She didn’t question.

Not now.

Not when he was holding her down, pinning her wrists above her head, his mouth dragging over her collarbone before dipping lower.

Not when he told her, “You’re mine, Tee. Say it.”

And especially not when she actually said it back.

----

Later, she lay tangled in the sheets, Jey’s arm draped over her waist, his breathing deep and steady against her neck.

Her body was aching, sensitive, satisfied. But her mind wouldn’t shut off.

She had dreamed of this—of Jey being hers, of knowing his hands, his mouth, the way he moved when he was desperate for her. But now that she had it, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she had done this before.

Jey had touched her like he had always known exactly how to unravel her. Like he had already lived this moment. Maybe it was just chemistry. Maybe it was nothing.

Or maybe, just maybe—

She was losing track of what was real. Titania woke up to the sensation of warm lips trailing along her shoulder, slow and lazy.

A deep hum vibrated against her skin as Jey pulled her closer, his chest flushed against her back, fingers tracing idle patterns along her waist.

“Morning, baby,” he murmured, voice thick with sleep.

Titania sighed; eyes still heavy as she melted into his touch. The warmth of his body, the steadiness of his breath, the way his fingers gripped her just a little tighter when she shifted—it was addictive. She had dreamed of mornings like this. Now, she had them. Every single day.

Jey kissed the back of her neck, his grip flexing over her hip. “You sore?”

Titania swallowed, her stomach flipping. “A little.”

His smirk was evident in his tone. “Good.”

Titania rolled onto her back, facing him. “You’re proud of yourself, huh?”

Jey grinned, half-lidded eyes drinking her in like he had all the time in the world. “Of course. Look at you.” His fingers brushed over her thigh, squeezing lightly. “Laid up in my bed, wearing nothing but my marks.”

Titania’s breath hitched. She felt claimed. And for the first time, she wasn’t sure if she minded. She slipped out of bed an hour later, wrapping herself in Jey’s oversized hoodie before padding into the kitchen. The house felt unnaturally quiet, the leftover tension from the night before still lingering in the air.

Her thoughts felt scattered. The familiarity of the night—the way Jey knew her body before she even had to tell him, the way he spoke to her, touched her—it hadn’t left her mind. She had let herself get lost in him.

But now?

She needed to clear her head. She moved toward the hallway, feet carrying her somewhere she swore she didn’t want to go. The spare room door was already cracked open. Titania’s heart pounded.

Don’t go in there.

But she did. The air in the room was thick, heavy, suffocating. Titania’s breath hitched the second she saw the page. A new message. The typewriter had written again. She hadn’t touched it. Hadn’t even been in this room since the last time. Her stomach twisted as she stepped closer, her pulse hammering against her ribs.

Her hands shook as her eyes scanned the words, neatly typed at the top of the fresh page:

"You are his. And soon, you won’t remember being anything else."

A chill ripped through her. Titania’s fingers hovered over the page, her breath shallow.

What the hell does that mean?

Her eyes darted around the room as if expecting someone—or something—to be there. The words sat on the page, mocking her.

Like a warning.

Like a promise.

Like a fact.

Her mind raced. Was it talking about Jey? Was it talking to her? A sudden warmth wrapped around her waist. Titania jumped.

Jey’s voice was right at her ear. “You jumpy, Tee,” he murmured, his lips barely grazing her skin.

Titania sucked in a sharp breath, her hands gripping the edge of the desk. She hadn’t even heard him come in. Jey glanced down at the typewriter, but if he saw anything unusual, he didn’t react.

Instead, he turned her in his arms, tilting his head as he studied her face. “Something wrong?”

Titania swallowed, forcing a weak smile. “No. Just… woke up early.”

Jey’s gaze lingered for a second too long, as if he knew she was lying. Then, just as easily, his lips curled into a smirk.

“I was thinking…” he murmured, dragging his thumb lazily along her hip. “…maybe it’s time we move.”

Titania’s entire body stiffened. She barely found her voice. “Move?”

“To Florida.”

The room tilted. Her breath caught in her throat. She never wrote that. That was never even a thought of hers.

Jey’s smirk widened. “Yeah, Tee. I want us to be together. For real. No more back and forth.”

Titania’s chest tightened. Was this him? Or was this the typewriter deciding for her again? And worse—was she already too far gone to tell the difference?

Titania barely spoke the rest of the day. Jey didn’t seem to notice—or if he did, he didn’t care. He was too caught up in the idea of them moving to Florida, of making their life together permanent. Every time he talked about it, his voice was steady, confident, certain. Like he had already made up his mind. Like she didn’t even have a choice. And maybe she didn’t.

Because hadn’t the typewriter already decided for her?

"You are his. And soon, you won’t remember being anything else."

Titania swallowed hard, gripping the edge of the kitchen counter as Jey moved around the house, talking about plans, about Jimmy and Naomi, about how easy it would be for her to just pack up and leave everything behind.

She should have argued. She should have said something. But the words wouldn’t come. Because deep down, she wasn’t sure what was real anymore.

----

That night, Titania curled up on the couch, Jey stretched out beside her, his head lazily resting in her lap. Some reality show was playing in the background, but she wasn’t watching it.

Jey was scrolling through his phone, aimlessly tapping through messages until suddenly, the screen lit up— Roman.

Titania’s breath hitched. Jey’s smirk was instant, as if he had been expecting the call. He sat up, running a hand through his hair before answering.

“’Sup, Uce.”

Titania listened, silent, as Roman’s voice rumbled through the speaker. Deep. Smooth. Effortlessly commanding. Even through the phone, he sounded in control.

“Just checking in,” Roman said, his tone unreadable. “See you’ve been doing your own thing.”

Jey chuckled, shifting against the couch. “Yeah, you know how it is. Ain’t nothing changed, though. You still you think you the Tribal Chief, huh?”

Roman hummed, slow and deliberate. “Damn right I am. I don’t care what Solo got going on.”

Titania shouldn’t be reacting to this. But she was. Something about his voice, his presence, his power sent a slow, simmering heat through her veins.

She knew this man. She had watched him for years, seen him command an arena with nothing but a glance, watched him make people bend to his will. She had always admired him. She had always been a little drawn to him. And now, suddenly, that pull felt stronger.

Jey was still talking, but Titania wasn’t listening anymore. Because a thought had crept into her mind, uninvited, unwelcome.

Could she have more than just Jey?

The second the idea formed, her stomach twisted. No. That was insane. That was wrong. But the thought wouldn’t leave her. Because hadn’t she rewritten reality before? Hadn’t she gotten exactly what she wanted?

Jey hung up a few minutes later, tossing his phone onto the couch before pulling Titania back against him.

“Everything good?” she asked, her voice barely steady.

Jey smirked, pressing a lazy kiss to her temple. “Yeah. You know how he is. Just keeping an eye on everything.”

Titania nodded, but her mind was elsewhere. Because now, there was a new temptation. A whisper of something she hadn’t let herself think about before. And as much as she tried to push it away, she knew it wouldn’t go anywhere.

Because the typewriter had already shown her the truth. If she wanted something bad enough, all she had to do was write it.

And maybe—just maybe—she was beginning to want Roman Reigns.

----

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Want to read from the beginning, click here

AN: What do you think is going to happen next? Love y'all for reading and interacting, means the world to me ꨄ

[rueclfer]

smau request- maaaybe tomura trying to convince reader to wake up and hang with him super late bc he’s def a night owl & they end up staying up until sunrise; flirtation & heavy petting etc as we love to see it

i wrote this at 2am my brain is fried but waow loser/slightly more confident shiggy ily+ enjoy this mix of written and smau <3

twilight zone // tomura shigaraki

"oh my fucking god, knock much?" tomura exclaims, spinning around towards you in his swivel chair.

"shut up." you yawn, rubbing your eyes away from the bright PC screen illuminating the room. "like you weren't expecting me or something."

from his desk, tomura watches you click the door behind you and crawl into his bed. you pull the comforter up to your chin and nestle into his mattress as if he was the one that intruded on you in his own bedroom.

"wasn't half-sure if you were even going to come." he murmurs before shutting down his PC, diminishing the only light source in the room.

you feel the bed shift beside you as he stiffly lays down. "might as well light some candles too while you're at it." you tease.

despite how groggy you sounded, tomura could hear you signature smirk in your voice- the one that never failed to irritate the fuck out of him. he hadn't thought this far ahead- wasn't even expecting you to respond to him this late at all. all he could think about was how quick his late-night confidence was dwindling into nothing, making him squirm a bit in his own bed.

"i'd prefer to not have to look at your face." he mutters.

owch.

you don't respond. the exhaustion was ready to take over once your head hit the pillow. you think about the last time you had been in his bed like this.

it was about a month ago when you found yourself too drunk to even form a cohesive sentence. he didn't understand what you were blabbering about, but once he saw your swollen lips, flushed cheeks, glossy eyes, and handle of whiskey under your arm, he just assumed the worst.

you were drunk, touch starved, and desperate, but of course he knew better than to let you sloppily smash your lips into his like you intended two when you stumbled into his doorway. he spent that night half asleep in his gaming chair, periodically reaching over to make sure you were still breathing with his trash can pulled up next to your side of the bed.

once you sobered up the next day, he scolded you. relentlessly. strings of obscenities dripping from his mouth.

from that point on, he made sure to always find a way to keep you two at bay- something that he himself wasn't even sure how to go about. elbow nudges. kicking your feet under the dining room table. laying your legs over his lap on the couch without you asking. pats on shoulder. all to make sure that night never repeated- unsure if he could handle you throwing yourself all over him again.

"are you fucking falling asleep?" you feel a jolt on your shoulder as he shakes you awake. "wake up."

"i'm tired." you whine.

"well stop. i didn't invite you here to sleep in my bed." he huffs.

"the fucks got you up, then?"

"nothing."

you go silent for a moment.

"don't be annoying or else i'll leave." you deadpan.

"don't ask stupid questions then." he returns the attitude. "isn't it obvious? i can't sleep. can't even game right now. i just want to..." he voice falters at the end.

"...hang out with you, i guess."

oh.

your jaw slightly gapes open in surprise, spikes of heat crawling up your neck.

you tightly grip the fabric of the comforter. "well, when you say it like that, it sounds like you actually like me." you chuckle.

"didn't say that. we live together. bothering you is my only option."

"lucky you, i love when you bother me." you scoot closer, noses onto a few inches away from one another. "and even more when i bother you."

"yeah, i know. it's like you can't resist me or something." he pulls the comforter up over his mouth, shyly muffling his words.

"i should be thanking you then, right? thank you so much, tomu, for letting me lay in your bed with you. please. i want you. i need you. it's all i can think about when i'm just across the hall from you. " you roll your eyes.

he scoffs. "wouldn't be the first time you were pathetically begging for me either."

"as if." you spit. "i'd never."

"but you have."

a beat of silence passes. you press your lips together as hotness comes over your body while the events of that night surges back to you.

"you said you'd never bring that up again." you clench your teeth, cringing at the memory of tomura retelling that night's endeavors to you the morning after.

"needed to humble you a bit." he chuckles. "told you it's not a big deal though if you're still embarrassed about it."

"no shit, i'm still embarrassed." you tug the covers up to your nose. "i tried getting at you and you rejected me. i'll never live that down, tomu."

tomura goes quiet for a moment. he must've been thinking. he does that often- retreat back into his head when he isn't sure about what else to say. or maybe he had finally fallen asleep.

you glanced over his shoulder to the analog clock sitting on his desk.

4:27AM.

it was late- or early. maybe these past few sleepless nights had finally caught up to him, hopefully to save you from having to relive an embarrassing moment.

to him, tomura's brain was malfunctioning. crashing. blue screen error.

"uh. wait." he begins, breaking the silence. "reject' isn't the right word. you were drunk. i just did what anyone else would have."

"call it what you want. i just wanted a smooch and you weren't with it. it's whatever, i'm over it, you heartbreaker." you dramatically sigh.

"well, i'll give you one now if it'll get you to shut up."

it was your turn to error and crash now.

"really?" your eyes widen.

tomura's breathing stops. he wasn't sure what gave him the confidence to say that outloud. maybe it was because he couldn't clearly see your face. it was almost like you weren't there- like he was speaking out into the void that made it so easy for those words to slip out.

he didn't mean it. right?

"yeah."

fuck.

"-if you want though." he quips.

please shut the fuck up.

"last month wasn't a rejection. i just didn't want you to only want me when you're drunk, you know."

stop talking.

"but you're sober now and we're talking about it and i just-"

your lips crash into his. it catches you off guard as much as it does to him. despite how much you enjoyed listening to him ramble out his nervousness, you couldn't risk losing another opportunity to kiss him.

your hands crawl up to the side of his neck, rubbing the tender skin below his jaw as you draw him closer to you. the floodgates have opened now. tomura met your lips with the same eagerness.

you were pressed up against one another, legs intertwined, sharing a breath and heartbeats as your hands glided over each other's bodies.

your stomach was twisting with anxiety. how long had you been waiting for this moment? all of those shy glances around the apartment, subtle touches, and hidden affections had clearly not gone unnoticed.

his hand runs from the nape of your neck to your lower back where he slips his hand under your shirt, causing you to pull away in surprise from the sudden contact.

"your hands are freezing, tomu." you gasped. "what the fuck?"

"sorry." he sheepishly mutters against your lips. he keeps his hand against the soft skin of your back, lightly rubbing the area as an apologetic gesture as it warms against your body.

"sorry." you repeat, humiliation starting to creep up your neck as you two settle with the realization of what line you two had just crossed.

a beat of silence passes.

"um. so." he coughs.

"so...yeah." you respond.

it wasn't long before you two started giggling to one another like a couple of children.

"shut up." you laugh, hiding your face into the pillow.

"guess i did say you coukd have anything you want if you came over." he breathlessly chuckles.

"please. shut. up." you squeak out. "i'm going to sleep. it's already like..." you peer over his shoulder. "almost 5:00AM, tomu. good fucking night."

you turn around, letting your back face him. you could die right now. melt into this mattress and into nothing. thank god it was dark and thank god he shared this humiliation with you.

he slings his arm around your waist, bringing himself flushed against your back.

"i'm not tired." he mumbles into the back of your neck, peppering kisses into the soft skin. "stay up with me."

you mentally kick yourself. because you do- not that there was much left of the night to get through, anyways, but because when the night's haze dissipates, you'll be dealt with a bigger issue that you wouldn't be able to pass off as a drunken mistake.

[fishnapple]

Your travel destinations, where should you travel to?

This topic was suggested by someone, I think it's really an interesting idea but hard to do a reading on. This will be a reading about what kind of places you should go for each purpose (to relax, to connect, to find inspiration, to find opportunity)

This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.

Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐

About me | Masterpost Book a reading with me - KO-FI (→ personal reading)

URANUS

The energy is quite active or, in some cases, defensive. Wherever you go, there's an element of protection, you have to protect something of yours, your stance, your opinions, your achievements, your possessions, you might need to be cautious when travelling.

To relax: somewhere remote and private, where you don't have to meet many people and worry about prying eyes. Could be some lesser known beaches or resorts. You should feel familiar with these places, they shouldn't be somewhere new, maybe these place were where you went when you were a kid and had a lot of fond memories about them. Even if they have been renovated, they still contain some nostalgic elements. I see fields, twilight time, birds, lots of water, maybe some place where it rains a lot.

To connect: lively places with lots of banters. This kind place should be suitable for talking openly so it won't be those dimly lit restaurants where soothing music is playing and everyone talks in low voice. This place is kind of rowdy, an element of competition, there is little space between people, strangers can easily talk to each other without much awkwardness. I see a pub where people are watching some show and talking about it, a debate club, a workshop, a sports centre, an arcade, contests.

To find inspiration: contrary to the places for connection, the places where you can find inspiration will be quiet, professional, everyone is keeping to themselves. If there's talk at all, it will be an introduction, a lecture, one person is talking while the others listen. A class, a museum, an exhibition, a presentation. If it's somewhere in nature then it will be a high place, mountains, hills, where you can see the scenery below and where you can see the stars clearly.

To find opportunities: lots of people around, older people, teachers, foreigners. Somewhere you have an emotional connection with or somewhere with lots of acquaintances. The setting is comfy, warm but formal. Could be school, overseas business trips, a forum. There are lots of talking, exchange ideas, commercial places, a bakery, a bookshop. Somewhere sunny and dry, should be near where you are living, not too far, like the kind that is continents away. This might be where you can settle down and stay long-term.

MERCURY

All the places you go to will have a great impact on your life, it doesn't matter if they are small or grand, secluded or public. They all have a certain foreign element to them.

To relax: this place has to look nice and beautiful to you. You can't relax in shabby, aesthetically ugly places. I see lots of sleeping, this is where you go to get some shut eyes. Maybe somewhere you go to periodically, somewhere familiar with lots of memories. This place will have lots of natural lights, you can catch the sunlight and the moonlight easily. Sleeping under the moonlight to recharge (but be mindful of moonburn though, it's real, if you have sensitive skin, the moon is strong in your chart or you were born on new moon, moonlight can mildly burn your skin if exposed for too long)

To connect: you won't be able to expect these kinds of places. Maybe you have some negative impressions about them or they seem out of your comfort zone. This will likely be when you are taken by somebody else to this place, not on your own. It can be an emergency or maybe something happens at the current place so you have to move to another. You will be reluctant to go there. If not, then you will only go to this kind of place on a whim, something has changed drastically for you, or you consciously want to be more daring and brave. In short, any places that you immediately feel the urge to resist going there, but, also have a certain fascination with them, will be the places where you can connect with people the most.

To find inspiration: somewhere you have to travel by air to get there. Likely foreign countries. You will hear lots of talks about these places, they could be some famous destinations or have a certain charm to a specific group of people. The sky is clear and bright, lots of vehicles, lush scenery, different from your own culture.

To find opportunities: this will be a busy place, people running around, a lot of things can be accomplished there. You will have to be fast and direct there, a very dynamic environment, likely your workplace or a job fair. This place seems serious, not much fun is allowed there.

PLUTO

This group might actually just fit for only a few people.

To relax: This is probably a bit unconventional, but the place where you can find relaxation is actually your workplace, or somewhere you can carry out your duty, do your job. The reputation of the tasks, the busy atmosphere, the sense of responsibility and helpfulness, and knowing that you're contributing to something might ground your mind. Another place is somewhere lively with lots of people, this kind of place can make you feel more alive, especially if you're someone who usually feels lonely or feels some voids inside when you're alone. The physical energy of people around you, the concentration you put into your work might be your anchor.

To connect: somewhere that lets you immerse in all the five senses, nature scenery, during the period of autumn, when fruits are ripe, the scents of everything grow stronger. This will be the place where you've been to in the past but now it has changed, it's about the things or the people you know are changing, maybe a wedding, the change of marital status. There's a feeling of spirituality and religion, could be temples, churches, places to retreat, the wood. Another one is the bank or somewhere you can exchange money.

To find inspiration: there are two types of places. One is a show, a concert, an exhibition of some artists, there will be performances. The other one is more like a situation, where you have to be at some places for some duties but you will have a chance to sneak out, to go anywhere spontaneously, probably with another person, this will feel like an adventure for you. This kind of situation will give you a sense of being free, being spontaneous.

To find opportunities: the place where you can find lots of opportunities for growth will be the place for meeting friend groups. You will meet lots of friends there. I see schools, the plaza, city squares, the internet, groups of shared interests. Streams, where water flows, places where you can hear birds singing clearly, water park, cinemas. This might be just for a few, but the cemetery or somewhere related to the departed, ghosts, hospital, somewhere you can connect with the ancestors.

MARS

This is not about the places but about the time, summer might not be auspicious for travelling, but the rest of the seasons, spring, autumn, winter will be. You might also take note of the moon phase, when the moon is half full, when the moon appears reddish, avoid going out, home will be the best place for you to be.

To relax: you might want to go to these places after you've done some major works and achieved something significant. It doesn't mean that you can't go before that, but going after the work is done will bring peace to your mind and rejuvenate your body. These places have good foods and animals, fruit trees, the energy feels old and bountiful. Could be camping, going to nice local restaurants, hot springs, farms, sheeps and horses come to mind. And good ol' home will also an excellent choice.

To connect: the places where you go to relax might actually be the places for you to meet and connect with more people. Some acquaintances will introduce you to someone, or you will meet them by chance, completely unexpected. Other places will be the bank, large stores, well established buildings, jewellery shops, somewhere with rich history. I also hear driveway at night, you might travel to those places at night, at the start of winter. I got a pretty weird feeling, a little scared, new connections might form when you're in some kinds of troubles, they might be the one helping you.

To find inspiration: you might want to go to see some contests, matches, especially sporty kinds, races, where people can compete, fast actions, and exciting energy. You might be in a long period of boredom or tense situations, so you will want to get out and get some fresh air, to shake your spirit up a little.

To find opportunities: you might go to someone else's homes to learn some skills or to show your expertise, or a place where you can practice those skills. There will be examinations, evaluations, discussions of the skills and the related products. I see wine and food, handmade crafts, things that take a long time to make.

[delphi-shield]

OLD FOLKS HOME ↪ age gap hcs

the people you love & the shit they do that reminds you of the dreaded Gap (tm). characters included: leon kennedy, chris redfield, jill valentine, claire redfield, rebecca chambers no warnings to speak of. remember kids, if you're gonna date people in their 30s and 40s, you're gonna have different cultural contexts and, most likely, different senses of humor.

Leon is eight levels of irony deep. He started doing Old Guy Shit just to mess with you, and now it's all come full circle. 

It turns out he actually likes watching the weather channel. He’s monitoring storms that are miles and miles away from you, pointing out the feeder bands like it’s some kind of sporting event. 

He's genuinely invested in Ice Road Truckers. He asks you to TiVo it for him when he's gone. You do not have TiVo. In fact, you're pretty sure no one still has TiVo. 

Or you were, until Leon once again committed to the bit and got TiVo.

Really, genuinely annoying about old movies, actors, and directors.

”What do you mean you don’t know who Robert Redford is? The Candidate? Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid? C’mon. He was even in an episode of The Twilight Zone. You’ll know him when you see him.”

At least you get movie dates out of it.

Movie dates that he will pepper with trivia about the film, by the way. You don't need the commentary track. He is the commentary.

I'm so, so sorry about this. 🤪 is his favorite emoji. I know. I'm sorry.

Chris cannot fucking hear. To be honest, I think most of them have some degree of hearing loss - but Chris in particular seems to have very subjective hearing loss.

Yes, you were just having a full-fledged conversation. No, he didn’t hear you ask him to take out the trash. He didn’t forget, he just didn’t hear you. Sorry, you were standing on his right - come on, you know that’s his bad side.

Explains basic technology to you because he’s not sure if you know what it is. Then, in the same breath, crams in so many military acronyms he may as well be reciting the alphabet. Does not explain the acronyms.

Like, yeah, Chris. I know what a landline is. Dial-up internet, too. Now, what the fuck is an ORE?

Have you ever gotten ‘ok’ in response to a nude? You’re about to. Completely demoralizing, by the way.

He didn't know you wanted him to compose a poem dedicated to your beauty, okay? He tries to get better, but winds up sending shit like 'wow 👍'

Does the dad thing where he insists he's not interested in watching what's on TV and then stands with his hands on his hips in the middle of the living room, enthralled by the show.

Jill does not understand your music. She will not make an attempt to understand your music. If you see her tapping her foot to the beat, no you do not. She is not interested in expanding her musical horizons.

She only bought you tickets to that concert because she knew you would love it. She only went with you because you’re cute when you’re so into this stuff. She only bought that t-shirt because it would be a good souvenir, and eventually, a good grease rag.

Generalized distrust of social media. Do not show her a tiktok. She will ignore the video and lecture you about data safety. Jill, please. Just watch the fucking cat video.

And then she turns around and opts in to literally everything on the McDonald's app.

If there’s a rewards program, she’s in. Already sold. Didn’t even read the fine print. All that shit she was telling you about how you need to be more careful is right out the window for some free fries.

Anything for the thrill of a good deal. If she had more time on her hands, she would be couponing.

Buys in bulk. No, it doesn't matter if the two of you could not physically eat that much rice. It's cheaper to buy it like this. It's fine. It's good for you.

Gotta stock up on non-perishables, too. You gotta be prepared in case something happens. "Better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it."

Claire cannot stop shopping from QVC. She's in the kitchen with David. It Takes Two with Mary and Sandra? Wrong. It actually takes three. Mary, Sandra, and Claire.

Infomercials have got her by the throat. You have so many gadgets and gizmos around your home that are just collecting dust.

Gets wine drunk and goes online shopping. Legitimately does not remember what she’s bought.

Absolutely will not let you open the packages. (“Some of this stuff could be for you, you know.” “Claire, last time it was a 10,000 count package of googly eyes.” “And I used all 10,000. You still haven’t found them all.”)

Uses every piece of technology until it’s about to fall apart. Absolutely not interested in having the latest and greatest. She’s one of those people who insists that as long as her phone can make calls and send texts, she doesn’t need a new one.

Speaking of texts. Somehow, she got it into her head that a read receipt is equivalent to a reply. She doesn't get what the problem is. You know she saw your text. Why does she have to reply?

Genuinely doesn't mean anything malicious by it - but also, if you did that to her, you would never hear the end of it.

Rebecca legitimately has facebook humor. They all have some degree of facebook humor, but she's got it the worst. 

Will blow up your notifications tagging you in shit that is just straight up not funny. I’m talking full on tagging you with “���😂😂”

Unironically sent you a minion meme once.

It's not that she's disconnected. She teaches undergrads. She knows what’s in, even if it’s only from the periphery. It’s just that she doesn’t care. She has no interest in keeping up with trends just for the sake of it. She’s so used to being the youngest person in the room and having to keep up expectations that she just absolutely does not care anymore. She's glad she's not one of the kids anymore.

If it made her laugh it made her laugh, her enjoyment isn’t shackled by feelings of shame!!

If you have a group chat on any platform with your friends please invite her. She's just happy to be included. She'll make a discord if she has to, and she'll brag about it to her students.

Yeah, she says pupper and doggo. She does. Look at her.

[kyunniebuns]

˗ˏˋ Jinwoo x Nerd! Fem! Reader: Drabbles ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡ ˎˊ˗

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕚𝕟𝕨𝕠𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

・┆✦ Entry : 037 ✦ ┆・

╰┈➤ ❝ [ Moonstruck ] ¡! ❞

Jinwoo can be what you call a jock . Is he not? 6 feet tall, a finey built body fit for the demanding sport he chose, undeniably attractive to the ladies with his looks that of an idol— You get the point.

But to him, he wouldn't have it any other way. Not that he is narcissistic of course.

It's just... Well,...

This life is way better than what he had to go through when the gates were open. Sure, he hasn't completely sealed the gates away, but this peace is still uncomparable.

As he looks up at the grey skies, he finds himself tearing from the clouds and looking at your distant figure from the bleachers busily jotting down something in your little notebook.

He heard of you from his many friends, or should he remain with them with how snarky they are? They often described you in degrading means, openly mocking your appearance, and discussing well... Your interests.

From what he heard, you were quite the eccentric person back then. Almost everyone in this class came from the same elementary school after all. They said you used to be the loudest most obnoxious girl in class, which led you directly into being the figure of mockery for young kids.

It was obvious that history made you into the reclused person that you are today. He never really pays attention to anyone, but Jinwoo somewhat knew of your presence around him— After all, he sat behind you.

Other than that? He never knew anything else about you.

⋅ ˚ ₊ ‧ ଳ ‧ ₊ ˚ ⋅ ⋆ ౨ৎ ˚ ⟡ ˖ ࣪

Jinwoo sighs as he packs up his notebook after the subject has ended. He was feeling deathly bored despite the fact that he needs to think about the research project that the previous teacher had assigned.

"..." He feels two gentle taps on his shoulder.

"U-uhm..." Jinwoo looks back, looking back at your awkward demeanour. "...Erm... We're assigned together for this project?.."

"Ah right," Jinwoo hums, "Wanna talk about it now? It's a free period after all"

"Sure..." You fidget in your fingers, actively avoiding Jinwoo's eyes that he found intriguing but didn't point out.

"The teacher wants us to discuss something about geology something" Jinwoo says boredly. "Any ideas?"

"..."

He watches you shrink to yourself and he clears his throat.

I must have come off as cold, he thought.

"I'm fine with anything," He said. "I'm not too good with these stuff so..."

"Twilight..." Jinwoo hears your small voice.

"Pardon?"

"We can do... The twilight zone." You say.

"???" Jinwoo tilts his head. "What's that?"

"...!" He watches you perk up, a distinctive glimmer in your eyes as you start shaking your fists a little. "I-it's uhm... The twilight zone or the mesopalagic which is underneath the epipelagic and is beneath the ocean surface and erm... Well, it's 1000 meters deep and since it's so deep it's really really dark, the only light you can see are the occasional bioluminescense flickers which is like a small light made by the deepsea creatures. I-it's basically made by a chemical reaction between luciferin and luciferase which are respectively a light-emitting molecule and luciferase is an enzyme. S-since the mesopalagic zone is really dark compared to the epipalagic zone that can still has a bit of light and algae can still have photosynthesis. The mesopalagic zone instead uses chemosynthesis that happens around hydrothermal vents and uhm... Methane seeps. Bacterias on the uhm sea floor, the very very bottom or inside other animals use the energies in err... Energies that are stored in chemical bonds of some stuff. We can use that for our research."

"..." Jinwoo felt like he just died three seconds into your little rant trying to explain what the twilight zone. He can't even recall one or two words from all that talking you did which he in turn felt a little guilty for. "S-sure... Let's go with the mesopela....Thing."

And that was the start of your friendship with Jinwoo.

He didn't really think much of it, the two of you managed to get a perfect score in the research project because of your extensive knowledge of the deep sea.

Jinwoo thought that would be end of his interactions with you, and yet he slowly finds himself looking for your presence. At first, it was just simple goodmornings and hellos whenever you both pass by eachother by the hallways during lunch— To him starting some small talk with you.

It really started so simple, it really did. But slowly, Jinwoo found himself purposely triggering your nerdy side.

At first, it was just him making an excuse to prolong the conversations. But now? He was actively listening to whatever you tell him to. He still had trouble memorizing or processing the many names and chemical, biological stuff you yap on and on about but in the end— He finds himself wanting to know more about it.

He wanted to learn more about you.

The sea really seemed to make you the happiest seeing how you perk up as you start explaining the life cycle of a sperm whale, or how beautiful the cetaceans are in general.

Because of your non-stop obsession with the deep, Jinwoo finds himself listening to whale songs that somehow helped him relax more at night.

He'd always have multiple nightmares whenever he slept, sometimes he dreams of his father's death, most times it's him relieving the agony he had gone through leveling up and the phantom pain of dying multiple times— Despite his age they still haunt him.

And when Jinwoo finds himself in the torturous cycle of death and misery, he hears the distant hum of whales. In his nightmares, he would follow those songs and get pulled out of his hell.

And he swears, that in every nightmare you would be the one to reach your hand out and taking him into paradise. He would wake up with his outstretched palm towards the ceiling, a tear falling down his cheek.

He craved to touch your fingers at that very moment, he wanted to feel the gentle caress of your digits on his face, the warmth of your skin against his, the sound of your tender voice reverberating in his ears as you explained to him all about the things you love.

Jinwoo would never really realize that he himself is growing soft on you. He knows that his friends would never shut up about how gentle he is around you, but he never really believes their words.

What's so wrong about him wanting to bask in you anyway?

He just wants to bask in your presence, drown in the moment just as you are with your love for the ocean.

⋅ ˚ ₊ ‧ ଳ ‧ ₊ ˚ ⋅ ⋆ ౨ৎ ˚ ⟡ ˖ ࣪

"My king" Igris's small head appears, hovering over Jinwoo's shoulder. "The queen, she's"

"Out with it," He says immediately as he had just had just finished changing out of his track suit.

"...She's hyperventilating, a few unruly morons decided to mock her of her unfortunate past and she is unwell," Igris explains. "Your orders, my lo—"

"Shadow Exchange."

Instantly, Jinwoo had transported himself to where you were. He wasn't too worried about you catching him, since you were too distracted pacing back and forth nibbling at the edge of your fingertips.

He shakes his head, knocking on the desk to catch your attention.

To which it did but it startled you.

"A-ah, Jinwoo..." You sputter, not meeting his grey eyes again as you fumble on yourself. "I... Didn't see you there."

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you" Jinwoo smiles gently, "Wanna go somewhere cool for a bit?"

"But... We're in school?" You tilts your head, watching him offer up a hand, waiting for you to accept his offer.

"It's okay, just trust me in this" He said.

You were hesitant at first, but eventually, you place your palm on Jinwoo's. He pulls you a bit close, his towering figure in front of you. But somehow, you felt completely safe as long as he is here.

The ground beneath you both would shift, from the pristine while tiles of your school to blue water reflecting your images. You throw your head up above your head, and up in the sky you could see fluffy and full white clouds moving ever so slowly.

"H-how?" You asked, baffled, your knees trembling as you feared that you will fall into water since you don't know how to swim.

"It's okay, it's okay" Jinwoo cooes, gently lifting your chin up. "Look at me. Look at me."

His grey eyes were so gentle, full of tenderness as it gazes upon you.

"Don't be scared," Jinwoo smiles, "It's all mine, so there's nothing to be scared of"

He then brings another hand out and flicks his finger, where the lovely sound of whale songs would catch your attention.

Your gaze would befall to your right, where a giant and majestic humpback blue whale would gracefully swim on the air.

More would appear around the both of you, from giant cetaceans to different species of jellyfish as well as sharks would fill the sky— All of them swimming about.

You find yourself so utterly mesmerized, your heart almost drumming out of your chest as you reach your hand up in the air, to which a few fish would come to your direction and nuzzle your fingers.

"It's kissing my fingertips, tickling me..." You say, your gleaming eyes looking at Jinwoo who was just watching you the whole time.

In his mind, Jinwoo would recall the conversations he has with his friends. They would never shut up about how he cant stop himself from hovering around you. How Jinwoo can't stop himself from ghosting his fingers around you. How his eyes cant hide away the adoration in them whenever you are in his sight. It was like he's this lovesick puppy.

And they're right.

He is utterly and completely devoted to you. He wants to give you everything that he has in his person, he wants to give you his paradise. If he can, he would rip his heart out and offer it to you.

He wanted to give you the world.

Everytime he listens to your ramblings, he finds himself lost in your presence. It was as if you yourself was his very own version of a lullaby.

And he wanted nothing more than to protect and love you.

"It's okay," Jinwoo says, intertwining his fingers with yours before bringing the back of your hand up to his lips— Where he would lightly kiss your knuckles. "Everything here, so long as I'm around you— You'll be safe and sound."

"Nothing and no one can ever hurt you, alright? So please, just keep talking like you always did, I like hearing about your love of the ocean. I want to see the prettier things of this world, so won't you tell me more?"

⋅ ˚ ₊ ‧ ଳ ‧ ₊ ˚ ⋅ ⋆ ౨ৎ ˚ ⟡ ˖ ࣪

That was the day that Jinwoo became your boyfriend. Days spend with him are full of love and adoration... Minus the little anxiety you have in your heart as a lot of kids in your grade would disappear. The only similarity with them was that they all used to be your past bullies that you would tell Jinwoo and people who would mock you behind your back. But since you have Jinwoo, you'll be alright. The police will be in charge of that. That is,... If they are even smart enough to figure out who this little serial killer is.

꒰ 🪼A/N: I swear I will make the Jinwoo vs Sylus soon as well as the sequel to the Assassin au. But as of now I'm still stuck in writer's block with those and I am still figuring out what to do with everything else. ꒱

ʚ(੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭ .｡✧･ﾟ: ~♡ — All stories written by kyunnie; translations, reposts, plagiarism are strictly forbidden.

[cosmerelists]

Pros and Cons of Stormlight Characters in the Middle Seat Next to You on a Budget Airline.

As requested by anon. :)

1. Kaladin

Cons: His legs are so long. His hair is so luxurious. His shoulders are so broad. This large, beautiful man is not trying to be in your space, but the budget airline seat cannot contain him. Pros: You started what you thought was an idle conversation, but by the end of your flight, he had diagnosed your chronic pain and become your therapist??

2. Shallan

Pros: Well, she's more of a regular-sized human and she's friendly but quiet. She seems to just want to sketch the whole flight, so no complaints! Cons: Why does she keep staring directly at a space across the plane and sketching the creepiest symbol-headed creatures you've ever seen with her eyes vaguely glazed over like she doesn't even know she's doing it holy shit is this a Twilight Zone situation where there are invisible gremlin monsters on this plane that only she can see and is it your imagination or do you hear humming from somewhere

3. Adolin

Cons: Listen, this is a budget airline, and this guy seems to think it's a fancy spa?? He's got the slippers, the posh eye mask, the luxurious travel pillow, some really nice face creams, and he seems to be video chatting with a girl even though the internet on the plane doesn't even work. Frankly, you're jealous and grouchy about it. Pros: Okay, he actually seems really sweet and he gave you some of his way-too-nice-for-an-airplane snacks. You take it all back; this guy is awesome.

4. Szeth

Pros: He is so still. So quiet. Almost folded in on himself. Barely...breathing? Honestly, you keep forgetting the middle seat is occupied, and how rare is that! Cons: You just...you think you'd feel better if he just blinked. Just once. Please.

5. Lift

Cons: You had to sigh just a little when a little kid plopped down next to you. Also, she goes to the bathroom every five minutes, and comes back with food every time. You think she might be robbing people. Pros: She complimented your butt quite sincerely. You've always been kinda self-conscious about your butt! But apparently yours is the "second best she's ever seen." Feels nice.

6. Jasnah

Pros: Like, is it possible for someone to just be really good at flying? She came in, expertly stowed her luggage, sat down elegantly, did her seatbelt, used a wipe to clean up the tray table and surrounding area, and immediately starting reading some thick tome. Do you have a crush on her? You might have a crush on her. Cons: She glanced at the book you're reading, and you know she judged you for it.

7. Wit

Cons: Does this guy EVER stop talking? Pros: Okay, actually, you found him kind of annoying at first, but that story he told you about the temple and the duck might have healed years of trauma? Did you just realize that you don't have to forgive your mom and that's okay?

8. Renarin

Pros: He sat down and you were like, "Okay. Cute nerd. I dig it." Cons: You just wish he wouldn't scrawl foreboding-seeming numerals on the back of the airline chair in front of him. Is it counting down to...just before the plane lands? What does it mean???

9. Amarem

Cons: He came in and was IMMEDIATELY like, "I am taller than you and so I should have your seat." And then he just...waited? Like he thought you'd just comply??? Pros: He seems intent on pretending that never happened. Fine by you. That guy seems like an asshole.

10. Zahel

Pros: He falls asleep, like, immediately and doesn't stir for the entire flight. Cons: He's just kinda stinky.

11. Dalinar

Cons: He sits down and, unprompted, says something like, "In my youth I would always battle to occupy every armrest but now, after reading The Way of Planes, I have realized that it is the journey, not the armrests, that matter, so you can have them" and then you're like, "Dude, the person in the middle seat gets the armrests that's just common courtesy" and then he looks at you and you look at him and it's vaguely awkward the whole flight and nobody uses the armrests. Pros: Actually, after a while you do take the armrest and the tension goes down a lot.

12. Taravangian

Pros: He just kinda seems like a nice old man, you know? Kinda confused about stuff, but harmless enough. Cons: He falls asleep partway through and droops his head onto your shoulder and drools a bit and you know you sound ridiculous but it feels somehow calculated. Intentional. Evil.

13. Sebarial

Cons: The very second beverage service starts he's all, "Bring me a BOTTLE of wine" and you're like, "Oh no. It's one of those dudes who gets way too drunk on planes!" Pros: You know? This guy actually seems pretty jolly and chill. You catch yourself thinking, "I wish I could pretend he was my uncle." You're not sure where that came from.

14. Rock

Pros: He scoffs at the provided airline snacks and gets out this thermos and gives you the best damn soup you've ever had in your life. Cons: He's just a large, warm man. Very large. Very warm. Not his fault, of course, but now YOU are very warm.

15. Elhokar

Cons: Every time there is plane turbulence, he mutters something about how it's the assassins coming to finish the job. Poor dude must be really scared of flying. Pros: You feel a warm, parental feeling growing in you as you look at this sad, scared man. Maybe your mom was right. Maybe you WOULD be good with kids.

16. Eshonai

Pros: This lady is, just, SO excited to be traveling that it can't help but make YOU excited to travel. Like, you always thought plane travel sucked, especially budget airline travel, be she is so delighted by everything that you find yourself thinking, "You know, it IS pretty amazing that we're soaring through the sky right now traveling to a new land." Cons: Cons? No cons. You wish you could ALWAYS see flying through this woman's eyes.