#as an oldest daughter + middle child

[bamsara]

I don't need to have kids when I'm an elder sibling with a 14+ year age gap between us and absent/busy parents. When was the last time you got a fresh toothbrush. What happened to your knee. The fuck you mean you don't have a swim suit. Get in the car.

[feralboo-the-weirdo]

Being the youngest sucks.

Being the youngest is always being lonely

It's always being too young

Always the odd one out, the late one.

The last to leave, the last to graduate

The child the parents give up parenting on because they're tired

It's feeling guilty you're the youngest even though you couldn't chose your birth order.

It's the guilt that you were treated "better"

You got "more."

It's being the baby of the family and feeling suffocated in the wants your parents have for you. It's feeling like you can never leave your parents.

It's growing up too fast because you don't want to be left behind

It's hiding away your emotions because you realize no one really cares

It's trying to be the sunshine child

it's trying to be the child the parents have to do the least for.

it's watching your siblings get punished and wondering when you're next

it's feeling immensely terrified of confrontation because you're never allowed to win.

It's being left with your siblings because your parents gave up on you and being raised by them.

It's listening to your siblings emotions and feeling terrible because you can't do anything to help them.

it's feeling to young

it's feeling like you deserve to be punished for existing.

It's feeling like you're the last straw that broke your parents. That if they just hadn't had you they'd still have money.

It's feeling like you have to be there for your parents because all the rest of your siblings leave. It's feeling like a third parent.

it's watching everyone around you grow old but you're still young.

it's feeling so old but you're still young.

it's being told you're selfish when you're literally a child.

it's being told to grow up when you're a child.

It's feeling like you can't have mental illnesses because you watch the strain it puts on your parents with your siblings. It's watching your family suffer but not knowing how to help and not being able to.

It's constantly eavesdropping on accident out of habit because no one explains what's going on.

It's trying to monitor the situation so no one gets hurt.

it's feeling incredibly uncomfortable talking about emotions because you weren't allowed to as a child because they weren't "important" enough because your oldest siblings just told you "at least you're not an adult" or "it's so much easier at that age."

It's feeling like an only child after everyone moves out.

It's feeling disconnected from your older siblings, like you never had a relationship with them.

it's feeling like a burden on your parents because you're the last one.

You carry so many secrets. You know so many secrets. You don't know what to do with those secrets.

Being the youngest is not carefree. In a way, the youngest caries almost as much as the oldest.

I don't know the experience of many other youngest siblings but mine was not the carefree experience my older siblings tried to make it out to be. But I'm starting to realize my childhood wasn't exactly normal so that probably doesn't help. I don't know that most youngest siblings aren't supposed to feel like a third parent to most of their siblings at like fifteen.

Please don't hate on this post, I'm not trying to hate on eldest and middle siblings, I just want to caution you to remember that your younger sibling is going to grow up and remember the things you said to them. It's not their fault they're the youngest.

Feel free to add to this post.

[traumaismypersonality]

It's always the eldest child this, middle child that, youngest child this. It's never the only child.

Yes the oldest have the most trauma. Yes the middle is always ignore. Yes the youngest is always treated like a kid. But the only child is always divided.

The oldest complains, our parents became parents to our siblings not to us, because they were unprepared. But the only child, never had parents, their parents never grow up. They didn't had anyone to experiment other way so they stay the immatured parents.

The middle cries, our parents never saw us, because they were busy with others. The only child, was always seen, so much that they could not escape their eyes and have themselves to themselves only.

The youngest yells, our parents never took us seriously, because they never thought we can grown up. Yet the only child, remained a kid who had to act like a grown-up since the beginning because ‘You are the only one we have. ’

You can't say being only child is a luxury. Not when I'm always flaunted as a trophy but ignored as a child. Not when I'm treated like a male but expected to be kind like a female. Not when I see my parent's being better parents to other children which are not even their own. Not when I'm always divided between my parents. Not when I'm their hope but disappointment too. Not when they remind me, oh how they wish they had another.

I am the oldest daughter who parents their own parents. I am the middle child who decided for my own future because the adults ‘never understood’ me. I am the youngest son who cries alone silently swallowing their anger but cracking jokes to make my parents smile.

I am the only child. I will always be the one to enjoys loneliness.

[crispypotatooo]

I feel so bad being the eldest sister. I tried so hard but I was always so angry, they'll never know it was all love.

[herdreamywasteland]

answer please, this is an experiment

I would hands down kill someone for my little sister. Like, the police wouldn't ever stop finding body parts.

and that bastard would be alive for at least half that time-

[moonshynecybin]

dyou think vale is tired of following these races every (other) week for his children and seeing his ex whatever on the podium next to his first born every damn time

i’m sorry im not (personally ! live your weirdo truth. freak your bean. go for itttt) a fan of when people nuclearize the rpf family (let them be weird and gay and want to fuck each other at least a little bit… please) and then when people DO they don’t even DO IT RIGHT !! like if we’re doin this then FRANKY is his first born. CLEARLY. to the point where franky had gone ON RECORD talking about how vale and co stepped into that role for him as a teen. like CMANNNNNN

[lolo-gay]

Nobody talks about how as a middle child you have to choose between leaving your toxic house like your older sibling did in order to survive, but that would mean abandoning your little sibling to be alone with your parents and feeling exactly how you felt when your older sibling abandoned you or staying in order to protect your little sibling but that would mean letting yourself die a bit more every day and abandoning the hope of getting better one day.

[roseworth]

seeing polls on here about sibling ages has revealed to me that some of you who talk about "eldest daughter syndrome" only have one sibling thats less than 5 years younger than you

[dragon-flies-72]

Just a reminder to go thank youre older sister's today cause I've just learnt they do not get enough credit despite practically raising you and they definitely didn't deserve to be treated like adults when they were just kids too. This is comming from a middle child who watched her sister suffer for not being academically gifted despite raising me and my younger sister, when our parents were busy working.

Seriously because they really do not get enough credit in society and no matter how mad and stubborn they are it's what they needed to survive and it took me a while to understand that (ofc if theyre assholes then dont thank them but being the eldest daughter is hard work)

[evaaraaa]

Brianna pastor, good grief.

[loeysthings]

As the only daughter but not the oldest child what does this classify me as

[feralboo-the-weirdo]

Haha, reached that part of dealing family crap where you're both terrified of your family and you just want to yell at them. But like none of them have therapists, or if they do they don't talk about problems like that. or they don't like their therapist for "reasons".

Sometimes I wish I had gone to war and got PTSD from that, because people have more pity for that than 'my family sucked because they were super emotionally neglectful and I'm not even sure if half of my memories are real because my family is only evil sometimes'.

I just want to yell at them. So badly. But I don't want to ruin them. But at the same time I do. I just want them to apologize for being ruining my life but that's not likely to happen. I'll probably end up apologizing to them.

Why can't they suck all the time? like I don't want them to, but I want a confirmation I didn't imagine my childhood. But like then they do suck and you're like "today's the day i yell at people" and instead you just fall into old patterns because you don't want to break eggshells and you don't have the means to leave yet so you can't destroy your relationship with your family yet.

But then like they stop being terrible the next day and you're like "wait, why was I mad? you're not that bad." and then it happens again and you're like "Oh, yeah. Okay. That's a good reason to be mad."

The cycles are killers.

[haunted-phantom-student]

LPT: if you have enough older brothers, you can be the middle child *and* the oldest daughter and get two complexes for the price of one.

[phatcatphergus]

tubbo and piso are such textbook cases of eldest child and youngest child respectively it’s so funny

No fr it’s so freaking funny 😭

If I knew nothing about either of them I could tell who was who

[sorry-imma-scorpio]

shout out to anyone who has listened to Family Line by Conan Gray in the last 24-48 hours 🫡