#as an artist myself it's so annoying when people share all of your memes instead of the art you work hard on

[stalkiwi]

Something I find myself wondering a lot is; is it ok to mischaracterize a character from a media?

I am of the opinion "everyone can have the views and headcanons they want on a character", after all, this is harmless, and most people use it as a coping mechanism or for projection. We, other users, don't have to agree with these takes, and can simply ignore it. Ideally, this is how things should be.

But, is there a point where it would go too far?

Let's say: you're not a content creator, you don't know art or don't feel like you can write a piece of fanfiction well enough. But you are really fan of a character, and you wish to find other people to discuss with about them. However, this character is fairly impopular, may it be because of their poor on-screen time or because they are barely relevant to the story. As a result, a lot of people in the fandom are unfamiliar with the character, outside of really surface knowledge.

As you do your desperate search on this character, thirsty for content, you discover a popular artist or writer, who do in fact, make content of this character! ...But you realize that the content they make is really different from the view you had on the character. Heavy headcanons, projections, out of characters memes, biased takes... You clearly don't recognize the character you love and tried to hard to study and understand in the most objective way.

But, this is a popular person - their influence on the fandom is hard to deny. Many of their followers, many which never cared enough of the character, base their opinions on what this content creator spreads. As a result, they end up loving this new, out of character version, and even make content of them, following the headcanons and version of this popular user.

You feel alone. A large majority of the fandom sees the character you love in a false, different version. You can't have a conversation about this character, because you quickly realize that the people you talk to don't understand the character and simply spit back what they learned from the popular views. When you try to share what you believe is objectively the character for what they are, people frown at you. "If you don't like it, then ignore it!", or even worse, they will argue that the version of the fandom is the correct one. You may try to bring proofs from the text, screenshot evidence, you will be seen as evil for trying to "break" their headcanons and not letting them do whatever. You just feel horrible, like you are the one in the wrong, the 'evil' one. You can't create content of your own views, you can't make a fanbase and hope to share this version you love. You may find one or two person who agrees with you, but they are often out of your reach, maybe they don't speak your language and you struggle to communicate with them.

You can't share what you love, because you feel like you're the different one around - maybe even that you're bothering, annoying, just trying to "force your headcanons" into people.

When this happen, can we really say mischaracterization is alright?

I wonder what could be done for such cases to not happen. Outside of reading comprehension, maybe we should be self aware that we are out of character, maybe we should promote other people's opinions rather than try to ignore them or invalidate them. Maybe it's better to say, "my view on this character may be biased, because I tend to project a lot and see them as a comfort character, so please don't use me as a base to build your own beliefs". Maybe, instead of saying "I hate when people think this of that character", we should say "I see people having this opinion on that character, and I see where they come from - it's genuinely good that people can find comfort in the character and love them as much as I do, no matter how different it might be."

Fandoms and other large communities are really difficult to communicate with, myself I tend to despite the "fandom view", the general opinions on characters. I wish more people could understand what the author(s) tried to communicate with the character, and not deny it. If you want a character that fits what you want, why take an already existing one and alter it, when you can build your own?

I can't stop people, I am powerless to do so. I don't want to, to be clear. It's really heavy on my mind, because I genuinely wish I could find more people like me, who agrees with me, with who I can share my ideas. I am lucky to be an artist and a writer, because I can build a fanbase around my views. I wish it was as easy for everyone, though

We should start to give more respect to the different opinions, or accept that ours is not necessarily the closest one to the canon, no matter how much we may be convinced it is.

[microwavedlion]

guess whooooo ! 🎤🐍

my favorite part of the experience (not really a specific part of tit so not a spoiler for anyone that sees this) was that it just made it so clear how much they love us and each other and it warms my heart that the phandom has come this far and it truly feels like a phamily :))

im sorry to hear about your scholarship ! hopefully you can get it back, and i hope with all of my heart that you can get any resources you need to do whats right for you. im actually taking this semester off doing online courses at a community college in my hometown, but next semester i'll go back to my university and try to pick up where i left off. school isn't for everyone, i'm coming to learn, but unfortunately it feels required 😫

i only started listening to muse maybe 2 months ago at most and they've quickly racked up minutes on my spotify. i wouldn't be surprised if they came out at number 1 despite the odds. i cant believe ive gone like 8 years in the phandom without giving a proper listen to them, besides uprising. i suppose the current fixation is the best i can do to make up for lost time 💪

chinese is so cool omg. ive never tried learning it but from my understanding it's rather complicated. i understand spanish as i grew up with it and with that means mildly understanding other latin based languages, like french. speaking, grammar, conjugation and the like are a different story tho, so hopefully one day i'll lock in and level up my skills and be able to actually say i'm fluent in spanish

i was gonna write something in french but i've quickly realized i know like actually nothing... if i read a meme in french i could probably get it but i have no vocabulary so cheval fromage oui oui baguette i guess 🥖

i am totally a serial killer and im outside your house ready to practice signing with you 🤺

for reasons undisclosed i do think you're onto me 😅 while i'm enjoying the pen-pal-snail-mail we've got going, i'll maybeeeee send a dm soon if i can stop being insane. i haven't talked to new people or made online friends in a really long time and for some reason a part of me feels like i'll be shot on sight for the crime of being mildly annoying lmao

throwing breadcrumbs at your window,

-🐍

that was definitely my favourite part of tit too. i love how much they love us, and that they're no longer afraid to love eachother out loud. it felt so special, like a little secret and a huge family gathering at the same time. i get emotional if i think about how much growth this required. i also got to meet one mutual (hi manda if you're reading this), so that was pretty fun too.

don't worry about my scholarship, thankfully it doesn't make or break uni for me. honestly, i feel like i do have access to the resources i need to be successful i just... can't? i'm too stuck in my head with some things that i don't think i should share publicly. but it makes it really hard to gather the focus or motivation to do any of my work. i'm pretty much staring at my very very manageable pile of things to do and going "fuck, let me think about something i don't even enjoy thinking about instead!" yeah, not very effective. i get what you mean, school really does feel like a necessity. and it feels like a waste to quit it when i've already invested money and time into it. i hope your time with online school has been good to you, i wouldn't mind moving entirely online myself, but i don't really want to move back in with my parents. hopefully things are looking up for you.

i like muse a lot, at least the handful of songs that i've listened to. i think they make excellent use of lyrical and musical tension and are overall just stellar artists. animals reminds me of "the execution of all things" by rilo kiley. not really sure why, but i wonder if you can get what i mean by listening.

it can be complicated, things like the order of strokes you write with matter, so does the exact look of the character, same with small tonal changes per sound that don't exist in english (because it isn't a tonal language). all of that can completely change the meaning of a phrase both in written and spoken chinese, which can be complicated to get a grasp of, especially if you haven't grown up around languages formatted in that way. but an important thing to keep in mind in linguistics is that all languages are equally complex and equally capable of communicating the ideas they need to communicate. i did spend a year learning spanish, but i honestly forgot i did that until my mom reminded me of it. i could probably say 10 words, total, and that's just based on guesses from my knowledge of french. i think you could definitely become fluent in spanish, though. a lot of people have the misconception that language can't be competently acquired past a certain age, but it's really a matter of native-like fluency & acquisition being easier prior to that age. you probably won't be able to speak like a native, but who cares, language is fun and an important bridge between people. you sound like dan in pinof 1 haha. don't serial kill me!

hah, i'm assuming my guess is definitely right then. but i can't lie, i honestly enjoy this snail-mail thing too. it's fun, and i like not having to respond instantly (now i have extra time to panic, score!) the only thing is i'm a little embarrassed that my other followers can read this haha. (hi guys). 😅 but don't worry, you can take all the time you need to get comfortable. i'm not in a rush, i'll be here hunched over my computer until the worms consume my flesh. if you can figure out a way to send snail mail that's a little less public, i'm totally open to ideas. oh and don't stress about annoying me, i really do prefer people who are stereotypically "annoying". i'm pretty bad at keeping up with friendships, i tend to not know when to respond and be pretty dry, which ends up with a lot of my relationships lasting 6 months or less, which is honestly kind of depressing. if i ever do make things awkward or haven't mailed in forever, you're always free to come poke me with a stick.

anyway, sorry for the rambles. politely setting up a heating pad for you

[azherwind-art]

About reposts

So today for the first time, I found someone had re uploaded one of my comics into their instagram account without asking for permission first, I got notified by a commenter who tagged me on the picture to let this person know I also had an instagram account since they had only given credit to my tumblr url. After I expressed my discomfort with the images being uploaded without my consent the user quickly erased the post, and did not block me. Now, I absolutely do not think there was any ill intent by this person, and that it was just in the spirit of sharing something they enjoyed, I also think they must not have known about my instagram since they were clearly intending to give credit to the original artist (and seem to do so with all the other re uploads on their account) so I’m convinced this was in good spirits. If that person is a follower of mine (which they may not be) I just want you to know I hold no grudges against you, however to you, and all others out there who may think on making a re-upload account with the works of others I feel I should express a few words on why you should always ask the artist for permission on it. Even if you’re not claiming ownership of the piece of work you are uploading, you must still understand it isn’t really yours to take, even if it is published on a public platform and specially if your intent is to share the work it is always best to ask the creator for permission to do so. Like in this case, had this person asked me for permission (and had I granted that permission) they could have known I have an instagram account myself and been able to use that to give me credit in the post, instead of just the tumblr url. Which would be much more effective since when you ask people to jump platforms they are much less likely to do so, for any user jumping platforms is far more work than just clicking on my tagged account and immediately be taken to it. Otherwise you may even be taking more views away from them rather than helping them (at least in this case the re-upload had considerable more likes and such than my original post that was also on the platform) What I mean is, if you want to respect the artist and help them grow and expand their viewership then always ask them, they will always know best how to better give exposure to themselves and will be able to provide information and links. Now, I understand why that process is slower, more annoying, maybe even nerve wrecking cus you may fear you will anger the artist, well let me assure you, if your intent is to not upset anyone, and they are indeed against you re-uploading their work they will always be more angry and upset to find out you’ve already done it without asking than what they would been by being asked about it. Maybe they won’t give you permission, but it is their work, and it’s best to respect that, you just have to accept it. In my case, I tend to be very open to people re purposing what I do, most often when I’ve been asked to use my work, for dubbed videos, avatar pics, meme pics and so on I’ve happily accepted and simply provided and requested some link and contacts on my plaforms to better help me increase my own viewership. Artists even when doing fan art, put a lot of work, time and effort into it, so please always think in how what you do with their work can affect them, many of us do use those pieces of media for our livelihood (and living of art is hard). So please, to anyone out there that wants to use my work, just ask me about it, I promise I won’t bite. To all those of you who have asked me, I’m always very thankful to you for taking the proper route to do this and very flattered to know you take interest and enjoyment of what I do.

[letoscrawls]

Hiiiii

I hope you're doing well!

I would like to ask if u have and advise about starting and art account on insta. I have a small one here on tumblr but people say insta is better for art accs. So I just create an account and start posting? Or do I promote myself in some way, maybe taking dtiys and other challenges?

Thanks in advance:D

Hi! thank you so much for checking on me! :) 

okay, i get this question quite often and i wish i could give you solid advice, but the problem with instagram right now is its algorithm. when i started my account it wasn’t that fucked up, so i don’t really know how it is for new artists who have just started their accounts now! but i can tell you that it really affected every artist, even the bigger ones, so please keep that in mind. if you “fail” to reach your audience it’s not your fault, instagram is literally sabotaging artists and i don’t know for how long it’ll be “the best platform for art”. so just to warn all of you, i don’t want you to compromise your mental health for a social platform that makes money out of our stress and insecurities, i’ll try to share what i think could work because sharing art can be really rewarding and shouldn’t be an ordeal so i’d be happy to help somehow!!!!!

so this is the “algorithm tricks” part: 

when i first opened ig, i remember my stories were viewed by at least 100 people for the first two days even though i had less than 10 followers, so i think that’s instagram way to encourage you to keep posting, so my first advice would be to post your art in the stories too, at least for the first week or something?? now, i know the algorithm is currently promoting reels, so if you’re skilled with those go for it! make videos of your creating process and stuff like that. it’s important to inform your followers when you make a new post bc the chances of it being noticed are higher, you have to do the work bc ig won’t show that post to most of your audience (did i mention that i hate whoever made this algorithm?? yes??) i’m not really sure about this but i think ig prefers the reels you make with their set of editing tools instead of just uploading a pre saved video (i think it’s their way to sabotage those who post their tiktoks), i’ve never tried them so i don’t really know what they’re like, but i’m pretty sure tiktok is way better. i read somewhere that IGTV aren’t ig big thing anymore, so i don’t think you’d get much engagement from them. in general i’d say to always promote your posts in your stories and to wait at least an hour before editing a post bc i think you’ll lose engagement if you edit it right after posting (i know, it’s so stupid).

the use of hashtags is the only thing that i approve, because it’s an helpful tool made by social media before it got so bad and they really help you to reach more people (that’s like their purpose, i just wish there weren’t dozens of other stupid rules to follow in order to be noticed besides hashtags). so using tags like “art”, “artists on instagram” and “daily art” along with tags related to the pic you posted (like the name of the character or the fandom etc) is really helpful, just don’t use unrelated tags bc it’s annoying and idk how convenient it is :P the last thing is promoting your posts by using the sponsored feature; i never used that because i’d rather eat a slug than give money to instagram, but if you have the possibility and you are okay with that then you could try!

now for the “artsy” part

artists have found many ways to bypass the algorithm and keep the community alive over the years, challenges are probably the best way to do so! dtiys are awesome, not only they help you get more recognition, but they also make artists incredibly happy! i should host one very soon myself, i’m looking for a pose and an outfit to draw one of my ocs in, hopefully you’ll see it soon! i cannot explain how happy it makes me to see people draw a character of mine, and it’s great to see them in so many different styles, so i highly recommend dtiys! usually the artists who host them post the entries in their stories too, so yeah, you should definitely try those! there are other challenges like art vs artist, memes etc, it’s incredible how creative the community is despite all! and lastly, draw fan art! contributing to a fandom with your art is so cool, personally i prefer it over original content most of the time, i feel the need to share my point of view and to let out all the idiotic thoughts i have when i consume some kind of media so i’m really biased, but every artist is different, so don’t force yourself to do something if you don’t feel like doing it! drawing something you don’t particularly enjoy because you want to get recognition is gonna make you burnout REALLY BAD, trust me, i personally think that passion>effort, so never forget to put your enjoyment first!!!! 

okay this took me a while and i hope it was helpful! good luck!!! i definitely forgot something dskfjhis

[churchkey]

2020 Writing Wrapped

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @anthrobrat and one of my resolutions is to do the stuff people tag me for (and also, Laura is just wonderful and I’m lucky that she’s my friend) so I’ll give this a twirl. 

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 8(ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome work.

I don’t know if I can make it to eight but we’ll see. Here’s a fun story - I used to be in this fandom back when we just shared stuff in a super-secret private community on LJ because many of the IRL guys were still alive and we were horrified of people finding out about us. But that was like 15 years ago and a lot has changed so here I am back on my bullshit and really so grateful that this fandom is still around because my love for this series and the very beautiful actors responsible for the fictionalized versions of the IRL guys and their crazy passionate ships who live rent-free in my soul has not dimmed a bit. So THANK YOU for being here and reading my stories inspiring me with YOUR stories and headcannons and being my friends. 

So here we go. All of these are Winnix, btw. Someday I’ll learn to write for another ship. 

Total (posted) Word Count: 119,294

1. A Spell of Riot (E) This is hands-down, no question, the fic I am most proud of having finished, not just this year but in all of my fandom career. I got the idea to write it from a kiss prompt last summer, just a light little thing about Dick saying goodbye to Lew as he drops him off for alcohol treatment. I never dreamed it would turn into 62k of something into which I ended up pouring three months of love and stress and tears and fairly painstaking research. The feedback I’ve gotten from you about this has been so incredibly humbling and I truly believe I’ve become a more compassionate person from this experience. You just never know what invisible battles people are fighting. I feel lucky to have had this opportunity to tell this part of their story.

2. It Is My Heart That’s Late (E) This was the first thing I ever wrote for the LLSS prompt meme, so it was kind of the first step I took toward actually being a part of the community rather than just going about my work in silence and isolation (which, tbh, I still do... I’m just that kind of writer, but I’m trying to get better about connecting with other creators). For this one I got to flex my description muscles, which was probably the biggest challenge of this story. I wanted to make readers feel immersed in the whole sensual world of Iowa in the summertime, as well as the inner nostalgic world of lovers coming back together after five years. It was also the first time I wrote an OC and had a lot of fun channeling what I think my mom/aunts would have been like at that age (as the whole thing was based on what she’s told me about growing up in that place at that time... Dick as the hired man is based on her family’s hired man, Tommy, who lived in a little cottage on their back 40. Sorry that’s probably more than you want to know.) ANYWAY. I was really happy with the subtlety (I think) I was able to bring out in the way their love has changed over the time they’ve been apart. And I got Dick’s ass to Chicago, finally!

3. Roger Wilco (E) I like this one because I think it’s the ultimate Porn with Feelings, even though when I started I tried to just make it straight-up porn. But I’m a sucker for them being completely smitten with each other, and those feelings sort of bleeding into everything they do/say/think/feel. I also think it’s pretty hot, if I do say so myself. Describing Dick pleasuring himself is like... maybe my favorite thing to write about with him, sex-wise. 

4. Things He Cannot Lose (T) The very first story I posted when I came back to the BoB fandom was Long Ago and Far Away, but that was a collection of ficlets I’d written many years ago. This one was the first new thing I’d written in many many years and it felt so freaking good to be writing again, and being in these guys’ heads again, and trying to do justice to the pining and brooding and angsting and loving. It was also the first peek of erection-probs Lew, which you all know by now is a thing I love to work in whenever I can. Sweet, drunk, lovelorn mess that he is, bless his soul. 

5. Free Kittens (T) It’s so silly but I’m proud of this one because I feel like I can’t write fluff and, aside from some of Dick’s decidedly non-fluffy attitudes toward the barn kittens, I think I managed to make it pure, uncomplicated domestic fluff. I hope so, anyway. I also freed myself of my narrative structure of staying in one character’s POV for an entire scene, trying instead to do a little more free indirect discourse and float back and forth between them. So even though it’s silly AF, this one has poked its sharp little claws into my heart. 

And I’m awful at the tagging thing and feel like I'm just annoying people by tagging them and also that they’ve already been tagged a million times but here we go @speirtongirl and @rillalala

[juliabohemian]

backhanded compliments & the art of commenting on other people’s creative content without being a complete twat waffle

WARNING: This is a long post.

I'm a word person. That's probably why, when I do find myself becoming irritated by someone else's unsolicited critique, it is almost always due to their choice of words. Words are important and very powerful. Words have different meaning to different people. Which is why we need to take care when choosing them.

Now, whenever possible, I will click on the profile of the person who left the unsolicited critique and try to get a feel for what type of person they are. Just so I can better understand why they might have left the comment in question. If it is clear they are not a native English speaker, I stop right there. Learning a foreign language is hard. English is one of the most ridiculous languages on the planet. So, mastering its nuances is a challenge for someone who may not have grown up using it. I’m sure I have offended at least one person with my Spanish, at some point. I’m working on it.

BACKHANDED COMPLIMENTS

When I say choice of words, I am implying almost exclusively to something known as a backhanded compliment. A backhanded compliment is a statement that seems, on the surface, to be positive, but is actually an insult. If you are not familiar with the backhanded compliment, I direct you to the mom from American Beauty who says to her teenage daughter "Honey, I'm so proud of you. I watched you very closely, and you didn't screw up once!"

There are a lot of reasons why people make such comments. It would be reductive to suggest they are all suffering from some form of insecurity, although many of them probably are. Some may genuinely believe that they are being helpful. Others may be jealous of the attention another person is receiving and want to either sabotage them or find a way to get in on the action. 

However, it is most likely that the type of person to give a backhanded compliment is either very young, very sheltered or very privileged. And thus, they may not realize that their opinion about something may not carry the same weight on the internet as it does in other venues. Or they may not realize that the world is filled with people who are more informed and more experienced than they are. They mistake their opinion for objective analysis and therefore, offer it freely and without hesitation.

Now, I would like to state that if you see something and you REALLY think it is problematic, you should absolutely offer your critique. Note: if you dislike or disagree with something, that does not make it problematic. Anything that promotes the maltreatment or marginalization of any living thing is problematic. Even so, you should stop and ask yourself whether your critique will accomplish anything or if it would be more worthwhile to simply report the post in question and move on.

That being said, here is MY analysis of some of the backhanded compliments I have received over the years (amalgamated for brevity), and a guide to leaving more constructive/supportive comments for the content creators in your life.

ARTWORK (including photography)

“Definitely not my style, but beautiful.” Do we need to know that it's not your style? If you think it's beautiful, just say that.

“This is so great, but it would have been better if you had used yellow instead of red!” Color choice is a creative choice and its value cannot be objectively measured. Just say it’s great and move on.

“Wow, this is way better than your old stuff.” Do I need to explain why this is bad? I hope not.

“Wow, you're really improving.” Slightly better than the previous one, but still bad. This is a really good example of something that might even feel like a compliment, but actually isn't. Saying that someone is improving is basically saying that it needed to improve. 

Unless you are speaking to your own student or a child, or a really close friend or family member who has openly shared with you their desire to improve as an artist, this is completely unnecessary.

It's important to remember that not everyone is doing things with the same objectives as you. Not every artist or photographer is aiming for technical mastery. If an artist creates something that is very personal and feels pleased with it, the last thing they want is for someone else to come along and tell them what’s “wrong” with it.

Really ANY comment that suggests that the piece of artwork in question would be improved if it were altered in some way is a no no. Unless you are an art teacher or someone has specifically asked for you to give them this information, or you are paying someone to make something especially for you.

FANFICTION (or really writing in general)

“Oh man...I was so excited when I saw your story summary, until I saw the pairing.” Do not comment on a story just to tell the author that you don't like their pairing. Ever. If you accidentally click on a story without seeing the pairing and you are disappointed, your feelings are valid. But there’s no need to let the author know.

"This was good but I don't think (character) would say (quoted dialogue)." Then, you should go and write a story with that character, but where they say different things.

"I noticed you used a semi-colon in the third paragraph. Semicolons are actually supposed to...." Critique grammar, punctuation, spelling and writing mechanics ONLY if you are the author's editor, the author's teacher, or if the author requested it. Period.

If you are commenting to point out what you believe to be a factual error, stop and ask yourself...is this really an error? Is the error intentional? Does the error represent the views of the author or the views of a specific character in a fictional work? Does this story have a reliable narrator? If not, might that narrator be misinformed or biased? And the most important question to ask yourself before correcting an author...do I actually know what the fuck I'm talking about?

Once, in a story, I referenced Copernicus and mentioned that he was imprisoned by the Catholic church. Which we know that he was. Someone commented to leave a long, bullet pointed explanation for how this is a common misconception and that the Catholic Church never mistreated Copernicus, along with many links to articles and videos as evidence. Guess who made all the articles and videos? The Catholic Church. SKIP!

When commenting on a fictional work, consider letting the author know how the story is making you feel. Speculate about what you think might happen next. Express excitement and anticipation. Ask a question for clarification about what you just read. And you can never go wrong by simply thanking the author for taking the time to provide you with free entertainment.

MEMES & JOKES

I love to make people laugh. I have been making people laugh since I learned to talk. This was actually bourne out of an inability to interpret facial expressions. I couldn't tell when people were angry or annoyed. But when they were laughing, I knew exactly how they felt.

That being said, people on the internet LOVE to tell me when something isn't funny. The only problem with this is that humor is very subjective and often very esoteric. I have made memes that I knew were esoteric and knew that not everyone would understand them. I have memes just for birdwatchers. Hell, I have made memes just for a dozen people who participated in a specific academic discussion. But it amazes me how people who don't get a joke are often most compelled to comment and let me know that it isn't funny. How can you know if you don't understand it? Is it so hard to imagine that things exist for which you are not the intended audience?

It's perfectly okay to comment and say you don't understand, and ask for an explanation. But if you look at something and think "I don't understand this, therefore it lacks value" you may have some growing up to do.

Before reblogging someone else's joke to add to the joke, stop and ask yourself whether your intention is to correct or improve upon the joke, or if you are attempting to laugh along WITH the OP.

We've all done this, I'm sure. I know I have. But it really inconsiderate to hijack someone's meme, meta or artwork with a completely unrelated discussion. I can't tell you how annoying it is to post something and check my inbox days later, only to find pages of notifications of people reblogging my shit over and over as part of some completely unrelated discussion.

Once again, if you're commenting to point out a factual error, ask yourself whether the error was intentional. I recently made a meme about the Star Trek films in which Data uses contractions. All of his dialogue is ridiculously out of character, in fact. Which is kind of part of the joke. But someone felt the need to reblog AND comment to let me know that Data wouldn't say that because he doesn't use contractions. Which I already know. Because, well, I’ve been a ST:TNG fan since the day it first aired on TV. I don't even know what to do with a comment that, to be honest. I kind of feel sorry for the other person for not grasping the joke.

So, how DO you compliment someone whose work you enjoy? Imagine yourself speaking to them in person. Imagine that they are emotionally invested in whatever they have created. Consider your objective. Are you expressing appreciation? Or is there something else going on.

And avoid qualifiers. 

When a compliment includes words like "if" or "but" then it's probably not a compliment. You would be so pretty IF you lost some weight is not a compliment.

Choose words that are unlikely to be misinterpreted. 

If someone's art or writing IS improving and you really want them to know, a good way to do that is to use the word evolving. Wow, I really like the way your art is evolving. This works because it implies that the art is changing over time, as the individual grows as a person.

I know what some of you might be thinking...ugh...it's like you can't say ANYTHING anymore! Aww...boo hoo, fam. As a person on the spectrum, I’ve spent my entire life dancing around other people’s feelings, navigating neurotypical subtext and struggling to say things without offending anyone. This is a cake walk compared to that. And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if actually thinking about how other people feel BEFORE you share your opinion would require a great deal of effort on your part, it's possible that you're just an asshole.

TL;DR

Creators of original content are actual human beings with feelings. Don’t offer them unsolicited advice or criticism. Think before you comment.

[czechforrain]

Caught up to the RWBY manga...and I’ve got opinions

CW / TW : Some discussions of implied sexual assault. 

Spoilers up to Ch 18 of the RWBY Manga and Vol 2 of the series TV show. 

So last time I commented on the manga I was just past the white fang thing with blake and I responded idk interested in how the manga took it’s approach with it. I wouldnt say positive but curious about it in a harmless way. 

THINGS REALLY FELL OFF THE RAILS. 

The manga basically speeds through the rest of volume two leaving behind major scenes and shortening the rest to where the impact of them is almost completely diminished. There are also some character differences that bear out due to the author giving people more or less focus.

The biggest changes are with Yang and Blake’s relationship. Now even if you dont like BEES, the formation of their friendship is a vital part of the show. Someone can read everything as “just friends” but them having a close relationship is inarguable. The moment where Yang confronts Blake on her single minded focus to find Roman / Adam and the White fang is this crucial moment where Yang gets through to Blake, shares her backstory and establishes a bond between them. 

It’s nowhere in the manga. IT WAS CUT. 

And it’s such a shame because up to this point you could have mis-characterized Yang as the dumb party blonde stereotype that even she would play up in the early season where it’s apparent that she’s someone who is sharp, focused and can read into people pretty well. She recognizes Blake’s anger and tells her that it isn’t wrong for her to want Justice but if she doesn’t take care of her self shell never be able to achieve it. 

Oh some other cuts. RAVEN. Just never showed up because they didn’t even fight on the train. They just kind of got to the point of train impact without facing that much obstacles before all the Grimm attacked. 

It’s really frustrating because 

1. That was an S tier Fight. 

2. It did a great job at pointing out what Yang’s weaknesses were. 

3. Introduced Raven as someone super important and powerful. 

For some reason they still have Banesaw around and he fights Blake later. It actually makes more sense he’d fight Blake than Weiss narrative-wise but that’s besides the point, it’s just kind of weird he’d just be there anyways since he wasn’t a big shot or anything. 

Oh and STRQ isnt mentioned at all. 

Ok now that we are talking about the Villains. 

Roman is weird, in the show’s he’s this dashing suave dude who’s like “ah there you are red, you’re too late hahaha” *dips but in the comic he’s got this weirdly sadistic side almost like he’s being built up to be more of a threat than what he was and a more unhinged person. He threatens murder directly a lot more and one time I even thought he threatened Neo but the paneling was just weird and he’s talking to Banesaw. Either way it seems like he’s less kind to Neo in general and since that’s literally the only person he seemed to get along with in the show that makes me care less about him besides “ 100% evil sunday morning cartoon villain” I’ll take my “80% evil sunday morning cartoon villain” thank you very much

BUT THERE IS ONE SCENE WITH HIM EVERYONE DESPISES

It’s a HORRENDOUS scene in Chapter 15 thought where 

CONTENT WARNING: Sexual Assault Implications 

Ruby gets captured, in the manga it’s because she’s trying to get back Zwei, in the show it’s because she falls into a hole. That doesn’t really matter anyways she’s tied up and well here’s the page 

followed by 

and this isn’t as bad as it was originally before pressure to change it  https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/f2f8j9/the_controversy_regarding_rwby_manga_chapter_15/ 

This is absolutely messed up. Just going over the content you have:

“I’d love to Entertain you myself”

“Have far more pressing concerns with a human like yourself”

“Plenty of Fun to be had, I’m sure”

and then Ruby gagged, and handcuffed to a chair as a bunch of tall faceless men in long black cloaks loom over her. You could say this all is just a misunderstanding and it’s just meant to foreshadow violence as a threat but it’s just done with such a sexual assault that the most charitable take is it’s a dogwhistle to that subject matter. Anyways thaat absolutely didn’t belong in RWBY and even reading it in Viz made me double take how they set up this scene and gave it such dark implications. Not that it was a deliberate narrative writing choice because it is undone really quickly. It just comes off as edgy and gross. 

Anyways some other things: 

JNPR Saga. Jaunedice is gone and while I’m not gonna lie, it’s definitely good that we didn’t have to relive through jaune going through his “ If I keep asking, maybe i’ll eventually get a yes through persistence” arc, I really feel like the pyrrha and jaune content is also weakened and though they might have overplayed this up in the show at least it ended up working on making me a shipper. Idk it wasn’t terrible but it felt a lot more surface level here. Also Ren and Nora were here too but even less prominent. 

Speaking of the dance, Blake goes with Sun instead of Yang. Because Sun invites her under the context of “you owe me”. Even though it’s done tongue in cheek, like even manga sun would hold it against her if she refused I think that this line does a good deal of disservice to Sun and also paints him in a weird Adam-ish tone. Sun’s whole deal is that he’s about unconditional kindness, he likes blake but he wouldnt want her to go with him unless she wanted it for herself. Leaning into the “haha let’s just say you owe me” leans more into something that Adam would use a source of manipulation. 

Oobleck: Is given a major glow up and actually ends up doing a lot in the end to the point at times it almost seems like it’s his story. He pulls of 300 IQ moves and ended up coordinating all the hunters and huntresses to the point of the breach based on the direction the wind was blowing and schematics he saw through someone’s pocket. Ok that’s an exaggeration but not by that much. The author is a fanboy over him and it’s good for memes but I’d argue it doesn’t improve the story by making him a more important character. I guess cool to see him fight a little bit more but it was kind of odd when he stunts on everyone so damn much. 

The fighting in general has some weak panelling except for a few scenes where it’s showing impact. The light as hell inking style makes it kind of annoying when there’s multiple people in one fight against a big target and you have to differentiate everyone and how people move from place to place. The way your eyes are supposed to move while reading a fight and how character motion transfers through panels. 

Neat informative video about that: https://youtu.be/zFFru4q_4H8?t=420 (whole video but I started at the point where they talk about panelling)

The art style is unique and i’ll give it that but too often it seems a bit more contrast and thicker lines would really benefit the series. Even when I was enjoying it, I still had these concerns. It’s just annoying when the artist is generally pretty good but you gotta zoom in to see certain things and all of that. 

So yeah, i’ve been disappointed in the later chapters to say the least and that’s incredibly incriminating when I wasn’t even that big of a fan of this adaptation to start with. I thought that maybe it could have been a loose reinterpretation for someone who was put off by V1/V2 animation standards/ wanted to get through the series even quicker but I couldn’t in good conscience recommend this as an alternative for the main series anymore. And that’s a shame. Luckily this all ends with V2 so we won’t have to worry about what else would be cut, shortened or ignored from the main series and we can focus on the actual show which all of love...or like at the least. 

[littlecajunlady]

Here’s a reminder that calling artists cowards is a way for rude, entitled people to get free art by making artists feel guilty for their interpretations. This “joke” is not welcome here. 

But now that’s out of the way, I do want to bring up something else because, while I haven’t seen anyone resorting to name calling lately, I have seen a few posts where people say, kinda rudely, stuff like “Why would artists draw this character when they could be drawing THIS character?” And I get it, we all want more content of our favorite characters. Some characters or ships can be more popular than others and that can be annoying. But artists and writers are allowed to like some things more than others, and to use their spare time creating the content they want. These random people sharing their art on the internet aren’t working for some network with millions of dollars in budget, like the other media you consume. They definitely don’t work for you. They’re literally just trying to enjoy their hobby.

I’m impressed by anyone on here who takes prompts or even commissions - I can’t believe anyone can just write or draw something they aren’t really that passionate about. I expect a lot of people, myself very much included, can only create when they’re really excited by an idea or a character. For me at least, especially lately, writing and drawing is really fucking hard, so I can’t believe it when people come on here and just demand things from people they don’t even know. They want your free time and your hard work and your art and your stories but they won’t even thank you. They certainly won’t offer to pay you. Sometimes they won’t even take the time to reblog or give kudos.

All of the stories I’ve written, I wrote them for ME. It’s always about the characters that I like, in a plot that interests me. If other people happen to like it, then that’s just a BONUS.  So if you don’t like what’s being shared with you for free, then you should make it yourself instead of guilting other people into doing it for you. To quote another popular meme on here, “is someone going to write this modern-day, AU, crossover thing, or will I have to do it myself?” I mean, yeah, you probably should instead of expecting people to work for free.

[9or10allgood]

I love Tumblr.  Far more than Facebook, which has become a seething morass of political partisanship, and while I’m all about seething partisanship when it’s discussed by people willing to engage their intellects, I’m less so when “debate” means posting memes and gifs which are, let’s be honest, the electronic equivalent of saying “nanny nanny boo boo”.

Anyway… Tumblr.  You can, to some degree, control your content.  If you are, like I am, mildly (*snort*) obsessed with a certain tall, lanky, Scottish actor, you can find like-minded individuals and follow them and bask in his glory to your heart’s content.  Likewise, you can follow fandoms based on television shows and movies and plays and music… and you get my point.  You’re all here so, of course, you do.

And, if you are interested in things like politics or social issues or the environment or science or all of the above (and more), that content is also readily available on Tumblr.

Generally speaking, I find the folks on Tumblr to be considerably more relaxed and open and accepting than on Facebook.  I attribute that, for the most part, to the members being mostly younger.  I’m a great believer in young people.  The future belongs to them and I am, present circumstances notwithstanding, mostly optimistic about the future. 

I’m a Boomer.  I was born eleven years after the end of WWII. (Good Lord, I feel old!)  There were no twenty-four-hour television or radio stations, and the internet wasn’t even conceived of, even by the most forward thinkers. Doctors still made housecalls as a matter of course.  Milk was still delivered to your door every morning.   The polio vaccine was still being tested.  Putting a man on the moon was a science fiction fantasy.  

As a generation, we “Boomers” were guilty of a lot of things, beginning with not quickly enough shedding some of the baggage from the generation before us. We were still largely segregated and we are paying the price still and we will until - I don’t know how long and that disturbs me more than I can say.  We were too quick to distrust the other - just ask the immigrants that came to these shores during and after the War.  There was a dear older lady in my church when I was in high school.  A kinder, more charitable, more joyful woman you could never hope to meet.  She was a German war bride - met an American soldier and they fell in love and married and he brought her home to his small, south Georgia hometown.  Their first decade was tough - folks were slow to forget and she was sometimes ostracized.  Even when I knew her, people would sometimes refer to her (in lowered tones) as Leroy’s German frau.  

We were abysmal when it came to the environment.  I mean, look at the cars we drove in the sixties and seventies before the oil crisis forced a turn toward economy cars.  Gasoline was $.37 a gallon - and that was hi-test!  What did it matter that my mother’s 1971 Mercury Grand Marquis land yacht only got 11 miles to the gallon?  Gender equality?  Seriously?  Gender Identity?!?!?  How you came out of the womb is what you were.  Period.  And if your family had that special uncle or the aunt with a Very Close Friend, well, it just wasn’t talked about, was it…

On the other hand, there were things we did do.   That social conscience that drives our society today?  You can thank those who loudly and visibly protested the Vietnam War for a lot of it.  Sure, there were anti-war movements always, but the Vietnam War lit a fire that, with the availability of news cameras and microphones and news cycles, burned hot and bright until the last helicopter departed the US Embassy in Saigon on April 30, 1975.  And when the war was over, there were plenty of other things to get riled up about:  the environment, women’s rights, the right to choose, civil rights, gay rights.  Anger over things that are wrong today didn’t just start in the 2000s.  A lot of us - and I mean a lot!  - have been pissed off for a while.

Putting a man on the moon belongs to the generation before the Boomers, obviously, but the drive to continue space exploration - the space shuttle, the probes that are still sailing toward places beyond our solar system, the International Space Station, the Hubble telescope - belong to us.  Medical advances?  Advances in diabetic screening and treatment, the MRI, treatment of HIV/AIDS… Cancer research was largely theoretical until the ‘70s.  The idea of DNA re-sequencing as a therapeutic treatment?  Late ‘70’s.

And as for culture?  My generation embraced the idea of embracing the accoutrements of other cultures.  Clothing, jewelry, hairstyles, music, food… we were all about it.  I see people commenting on “cultural appropriation” as if it’s a bad thing.  We - my generation - considered it to be a tangible form of acceptance.  

(As an aside, I have a dear friend who is battling uterine cancer.  She has lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy.  On one of her “good days”, she and her family took in an Indian (the country) festival and, while she was there, saw an artist creating henna tattoos.  On impulse, she asked the woman to create one for her scalp.  It was a masterpiece, absolutely glorious, and it gave my friend so much of her joy back.  For the first time, she was proud to show herself without a wig or scarf.  I think if I’d heard anyone say anything about “cultural appropriation”, I would have punched them in the mouth.)

My point to this ramble is this.  Lately, I’ve been seeing anti-Boomer things on Tumblr.  Boomers are rude.  Boomers are backward.  Boomers are outdated.  And while I get that it’s just a thing for generations to complain about each other, it’s the absolutism that I see that bothers me.  When I was young and dealing with my parents’ generation, I didn’t consign the whole kit and kaboodle to the Dark Ages.  And, from my viewpoint as an older person, I don’t heave a great sigh and clutch my pearls over the entirety of the Gen X'ers, the Millennials (raised one!), or the Gen Z'ers.  I may get annoyed with one or two individuals and have a sudden urge to shake my cane and yell “get off my lawn, whippersnapper!” but I manage to contain myself.  (There was the young man in the electronics department at WalMart who, in his most condescending manner, asked me if I knew what a USB port was.   I wanted to tell him that I’d been working with computers since before his father first bought his mother a malt at the chocolate shoppe.  Instead, I just gave him The Look™ and he mumbled an apology.)

Absolutism about anything is corrosive.  I mean, think about it.  It lies at the heart of so many of the evils that are tearing at us now.  It feeds the desire to hate all of the “other” because of a crime perpetrated by one or a few.  Wars result from this kind of thinking.  Down through history, you see it.  And it’s so much more easily spread now with social media.  Again, I would abandon FB altogether - except that it’s how I keep up with the folks back home - because it’s become a political, partisan, largely unintelligent cesspool.  All because those on the Left believe that those on the Right are the Minions of Satan and those on the Right think that those on the Left are Bloodsucking Snowflakes.  And, of course, they don’t all think that, but it’s so easy to click a “Like” or a “Share” without really thinking about the message they are sending, and before you know it things are out of control and we’ve put a dictator wannabe in the bloody Oval Office!

(Sorry.  I’m still upset.)

There are those who ask why boomers are offended.  I mean, “ok boomer” is just a joke, right?  Well, yeah, but that same reasoning has been applied to how many derogatory labels.   (I read one comment that “Boomer” isn’t an ageist slur. Except it kinda is, y'know?)  And, again, it spreads and it gets blown out of proportion and there are those who are just ready to jump on a bandwagon - any bandwagon! - and the next thing you know, it’s trending on Twitter and we’ve got one more thing to get mad about that shouldn’t be anything at all because there are so many other things that we really should be mad about and trying to do something about…

Do you get my point?  

If someone of any generation gets on your last good nerve, by all means, express yourself.  (Short of violence, obviously.)  But ease up on projecting the “they’re all bad" mentality.  It isn’t true.  It doesn’t make anything easier.  And we’re all better than that.

Aren’t we?

[homestuck-session-analysis]

Hello! I am curious about how a session between a 8 of my friends + myself and how screwed we'd be ;P. We have a: Witch of Heart, Sylph of Time, Heir of Doom, Knight of Space, Rogue of Hope, Page of Heart, Knight of Mind, Prince of Blood and Knight of Light. I don't know if this would affect our session at all but everyone is female except the Page of Heart.

THIS IS THE LAST FORGOTTEN ASK!  YAHOO!!!

Witch of Heart

Personality: Witches tend to find themselves in societies or situations where they are dissatisfied, which makes them strong revolutionaries and visionaries.  Their rebellious nature causes them to change their aspect in ways inconceivable to others.  As a Heart player, she would probably be very critical of others, or maybe even herself.  It is possible that this may manifest as a matchmaking personality, as is common for Heart players, though that is not always the case.  She will not be happy until her vision is realized.

Abilities: The Witch of Heart would be able to control a person’s emotions and/or identity.

Session Contribution:  The Witch of Heart is really scary, but useful in a way.  If you don’t mind manipulating people and possibly destroying their senses of self, then she would be very helpful!Sylph of Time

Personality: Sylphs are people who have a great sense of someone’s potential, and they tend to be driven to help in any way possible.  This can make them seem to be incredibly nosy and a little annoying, but they have nothing but good intentions.  As a Time player, she would be very concerned with her friends’ progression and development toward their destiny.  Her biggest weakness is that she cannot accept when something is a lost cause.

Abilities: The Sylph of Time would be able to mend tears in time and heal others by either reverting their injury to before it happened, or by accelerating the healing process.

Session Contribution: This is your healer.Heir of Doom

Personality: Heirs tend to come off as very dumb, but a more accurate term would be happy-go-lucky.  They are very much a representation of “ignorance is bliss,” for they tend to grow up very sheltered and secure, especially under by aspect.  As a Doom player, she gains her sense of security from her pessimism. By expecting the worst, she feels like she is always prepared for anything.  Heirs tend to struggle with change, as they tend to get comfortable with where they are.

Abilities: The Heir of Doom is the meme build of the century, because her special ability is dying.  I’d like to believe that she would also be able to bring herself back, just to make it less absolutely terrible, so she’s effectively able to play dead.  Also, I’m sure she will also be able to use Doom based powers.(Note: Actually, if she god tiers, she can likely avoid a just or heroic death by using her ability of dying, which would probably count as neither.)

Session Contribution: If she has additional powers, then she would be a great asset to the team.  If not, well, she will outlast everyone and might allow shenanigans to happen to fix a disaster scenario.  I dunno, this is a weird one.Knight of Space

Personality: Knights are a very insecure lot, typically using their aspect to attempt to create a facade that makes them seem more impressive.  As a Space player, they would try to manifest the “tortured artist” persona, and will very likely distance themself from others.  To develop as a person, they should learn to trust others and lower their walls.

Abilities: As a wielder of Space, they would be a teleportation master, being able to teleport themself or others or weapons in a fight.

Session Contribution:  The Space player’s duty is to breed the Genesis Frog, and this Knight will be able to do it very effectively on their own!  The Knight is called to a session with a lack of their aspect, in this case, Space, so either they must efficiently utilize the little creativity or physical space given.Rogue of Hope

Personality: Rogues are very selfless people, as they share a worldview with Robin Hood.  Their strong sense of justice and equality makes them easy to talk to, as they are very respectful.  They are also very spunky and ready to do what’s right!  As a Hope player, they tend to be especially concerned with social justice and equal opportunity, and they will be very trusting of others.  Sometimes, the Rogue puts themself into danger to right a wrong, so make sure they understand that it’s okay that life isn’t always fair.

Abilities: The Rogue of Hope is a very strong asset, as they can reallocate their enemies’ success and potential to the team.  This may manifest in the ability to take their very will to fight away and giving it to the team.

Session Contribution: The Rogue is a very important morale booster for the team, and depending on your interpretation of Hope, they might be able to solely win you the game.Page of Heart

Personality: Pages are known to be very weak and impressionable.  Like the knight, they are very insecure about their weaknesses, but instead of acting impressive, they display their weakness in hope that someone will help.  As a Heart player, the Page will likely have very little emotional intelligence and be very awkward, or find it difficult to empathize with others.  He can only grow once he recognizes other people as people with feelings.

Abilities: The Page of Heart would ultimately be able to project their emotions onto others, give identity to otherwise faceless game constructs, and other abilities.

Session Contribution: The Page of Heart would be a great emotional support.Knight of Mind

Personality: Knights are a very insecure lot, typically using their aspect to attempt to create a facade that makes them seem more impressive.  As a Mind player, she tries to appear purposeful, calculating, and responsible (if that wants to manifest itself as a random skateboarder-persona, it ain’t my business), but in reality she is rational and responsible in a less extreme way.  To develop as a person, she should learn to trust others and lower her walls.

Abilities: The Knight of Mind would be able to wield Mind by strategizing, using her understanding of consequences and free will to assist her on the battlefield.

Session Contribution: Knights are called to sessions with a lack of their aspect, which means that there will not be much logic or accountability taken in this session.  It is up to the Knight to make up for this by utilizing what she has to the best of her ability.Prince of Blood

Personality: Princes have fairly destructive personalities and resent others, mostly because they strongly resent themselves.  Their self-hatred often lead to them harming others, either intentionally or unintentionally.  As a Blood player, this Prince is going to have had issues with prior relationships she had, and she likely rejects societal expectations or the notion of the importance of interpersonal connections.  She needs to learn how to accept accountability for her actions and accept herself for who she truly is.

Abilities: The Prince of Blood would be able to destroy bonds between people, especially with the purpose to break an enemy’s allegiance to their allies.  She may also be able to establish bonds between people that would eventually harm them.

Session Contribution: I swore to myself I wouldn’t bring Modfic into this, but to anyone who read it, one of the characters was a Prince of Blood, and although he not trying to fuck everything up, most of the deaths happened because of him.  This player is going to cause a lot of strife among the team.Knight of Light

Personality: Knights are a very insecure lot, typically using their aspect to attempt to create a facade that makes them seem more impressive.  As a Light player, they would try to come off as intelligent and always knowing what’s going on, and while they are bright, they need to learn that it’s okay not to have all the answers.  This is basically a Knight who tries to be a Seer.

Abilities: As a wielder of knowledge, the Knight would be a fantastic stategian, but they would also be able to use light offensively very well.

Session Contribution: Knights are typically called to sessions with very little of their aspect, and it is their job to make the most of the little bit that’s present.  It isn’t surprising that this Knight appeared, as Light is commonly associated with knowledge, and you have no observation classes.  This player will function as your observer, not by gaining knowledge, but instead by using inductive reasoning.

Interpersonal Dynamics

The Witch/Prince and the Page would be super toxic with each other, keep them away from each other.

However, at peak power, I could imagine the Witch being able to change the Page’s god tier so that it is no longer conflicting, as well as the Knights’, so if they are comfortable with it, I would use it to my advantage!

The Knights of Mind and Light would be close friends.

Keep the Sylph of Time with the Page of Heart, she would stick through with him and make sure he matures into his powers.

The Rogue of Hope and the Sylph of Time would be cool with each other.

The Heir should work together with the Sylph, because destiny is also a very important part of the Doom player’s quest.

The Witch and the Prince can cause emotional havoc among the team when brought together.

Session Overview

Too Many Knights!: Knights are the worst class to have repeats of, because they’re present specifically to make up for a lack in the session, and if two are gonna die…well the session will probably not have enough of what it needs to succeed.  If the Witch doesn’t learn to change a person’s classpect, you’re going to have to keep the Knight of Space, at least until she breeds the frog, and then I’d personally keep the Knight of Mind.

Witch or Page?: Same problem, you have two Heart players, though this one is more of a coin flip.  I’d keep both until it’s obvious whether the Witch can change a player’s classpect, but if not, you’d want to keep the Page.  The Witch is more useful, but combined with your Prince, people are gonna start killing each other.

Leader: Rogue of Hope or Knight of Mind.

Offense: The three Knights, the Prince, and the Witch are all built very offensively in this session.

Planning: The Knights of Mind and Light are very very very bad signs together.  They better start doing their jobs, and hope that one of them doesn’t die.

Survival: Three players are “doomed” due to classpect redundancy, but the Sylph is a good healer!  Also, the Heir is still hilarious.

Frog Breeding: Knight of Space is amazing at breeding frogs, and if they need help, she has two other Knights to help!

Loyalty: You’re fucked.  Hope your Witch and Prince are nice, or that the Page or the Rogue can do something to offset how much of a shitshow this will be.

Overall: This session is also cursed, but not as cursed.  If you lose, it’ll be because someone murdered everyone.

]>>Maso

[finsterhund]

This con is big but not too nice.

I like the accessible washroom of the building

I like how spaced the artist tables are. But geez.

Artists are upset about the crappy wooden tables, people are talking about the artists who got banned for complaining about getting scammed out of their second table.

The artists here are great though. I wish the con cared more about them. Lots of people I know here. Many I already commissioned. I'm not going to get a second commission from someone if I haven't scanned and uploaded the one I got from them previously. Doesn't seem right.

I commissioned an artist who it was their first con, and I have an artist I want to commission online later.

I had to pay extra money for the sky train to refill my card. Would have been nice if the one lording it over us about having a car would actually have helped us today with said car but I think maybe we need to give those poor cyclists a break (okay, maybe I'm being a bit too petty with this now)

The pain medicine keeps me feeling okay. I love cosplaying as Andy again. Maybe in the winter months I'll get new converse so they're not hurting my legs and back. I need them up one size that's a big reason why cosplaying as Andy hurts.

I wish I wasn't so hot I hate sweating. I wish I was healthy and that I could finally finish my cosplay. Someday. I finally get to see a specialist soon. Hoping that puts me on the road to finally having normalcy and a body that at least tries to work properly.

My friend reminded me that we first made my cosplay when I was still ten pounds underweight so the fact that my shorts are tighter on me than usual shouldn't be too unexpected. My back flaring up definitely contributes to it too. I think a big chunk of me thinking I'm an ugly lump is not because of things like diet and more just my body being the unfortunate way it is. Thanks to bad genetics and scar tissue I'm bottom-heavy and no amount of fixing my diet is going to change that. I'm the Danny Devito of Andys. But admittedly the bad situation of July likely made it more noticable. I hate being a thicc boy. I meme about being the designated "fat kid who dies first" but I'm actually sensitive about it.

For how expensive it is to buy a single pass and a falling apart table here, this con has no internet for artists. But that's consistent. Was that way the last few years too. Funny how the cons that cost less and come with the right number of badges and a clean table also have free internet for the artist alley.

To be honest as much as I love all the artists and attendees here and being more likely to be recognized as Andy I really do not like this con.

The art of Andy I got from the first convention attendee artist is very cute. Crisp black and white inks so it'll scan well and I can't wait to share. But no internet!

There's an artist who does custom buttons but they're unlike any buttons I've ever seen. They are wrapped in an acrylic casing instead of punched around a metal piece. I want to get an Andy button from them. That reminds me I haven't scanned any of my custom Andy buttons.

Someone offered the take a photo of me against a banner but I didn't feel good enough. I probably should have taken them up on the offer but I just felt yuck.

The only video game sellers did not have PS1 games which actually angered me lmao.

Sales aren't good I think.

I'm sweating real bad. So glad I got a bath last night and brought my deodorant. Good god. Where's the AC? It's days like these I wish Andy ran around the Darkland barefoot so I could get out of wearing socks. I expell so much heat through my feet and hands I don't want to eat my chocolate snacks I brought for fear they will melt all over my fingers.

I went outside to bring my friend back a coffee (I can do this all by myself because of how close it is hurray!) But as soon as I went back in I started to sweat again.

I found a friend lined up in front of the ATM. We talked. It was nice to see them again. I found another friend elsewhere and also the first friend came around later. Was fun.

WHY DOES NO ONE KNOW HOW TO USE DEODERANT? I WANT TO DIE. I have had to walk behind people who smell like absolute death and it's made me feel really gross. Here I am concerned about a little sweat and there's people who you'd think are UNDEAD because of how the scent of ?????? trails behind them for like ten feet. You can smell when they pass behind you. I want to throw up.

I got some more art. The Andy button I was interested in, found someone else to commission something digital. The Andy button is AMAZING. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. it's hard to clip it closed but it's so cool and it opens so I can scan the art inside.

I got stickers from my friends I wanted to get, and a secret gift for Fishy made by my friend Sam. I intend to make a care box (is that the word?) cuz I know your birthday is coming up this month.

My stickers already got scuffed on my new folder so I'm sad. I hate being a bumbler who bumps things.

There was an artist who drew dogs but I couldn't find them again :(

I think I made a new friend. He is super cool and does panels at vancoufur. His fursona also wears a bandanna.

I feel a lot better about pain medicine. My friend says I could be able to take it every day and I just need to be careful not to take too much. I know people like me run the risk of becoming immune to them and having a sick liver but he says as long as I don't take too many it's fine.

Is this why I'm so miserable all the damn time!?

Legit what if that's the problem?

So I'm feeling pretty good about that. You guys might see a brand new Finsterhund. I'm so excited to have energy and feel comfy again. I was raised with fear mongering of "only using pain medicine when it was worse than usual. Because it'd kill you." But all that is untrue and I've been suffering needlessly this whole time.

So yeah. Now I'm going to start taking them bi daily. As well as the ones to help me sleep.

Genuinely feeling good about this. Andy cosplaying! Pain relief! It's all here! Things finally looking up for lil ol me.

I'm budgeting this con better too. Half of that is because I'm getting lost and can't find artists i wanted to commission again but that's a side effect of my worsening memory. I want to get a small ocarana but I might not be able to afford it by the end. It'd be nice to play Andy's Mission on. That way it won't annoy my friend like a kazoo would. Even though he said my kazoo is fine and he wouldn't have given it to me if it wasn't.

There's more artists I wish I could commission but I'm trying to be careful.

I was very hungry and they had hotdog rollers right outside the con and I really wanted one and they were SIX DOLLARS AND FIFTY CENTS. That's awful. But I got one because I was so hungry. It tasted good at least.

There's an hour and a half left of the day. I don't know what we will do after. I don't want to socialize except with my friends and if I go to bed early I'll be up at 4AM again.

There's now a little under an hour left and I'm tired. Wanting to go back to the hotel room and relax. I'm disappointed in myself for buying the expensive hotdog.

Whisky has been shedding since I brushed him and part of me is all AAAAAAAAAA but the other part is all "this would definitely have been canon."

My friend left his table under my care for the last twenty minutes of the day and I'm kinda anxious. I'm scared that ex roommate "took revenge" on my stuff back at the hotel room. He's never done stuff like that before, but he has threatened to. I also have that sense of emptyness inside that I get sometimes. The one where you just feel bad, no reason to, just emotionally hurt.

[interspecieslesbianism]

My Boss’ Son

So I uh...wrote fic. This is the first thing I’ve finished in a while. Just a quick thing I wrote while at work. It’s unbeta’d with no reread because I didn’t want to give myself a chance to hate it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Stiles liked his boss. He knew a lot of people didn’t like theirs, and he knew he was lucky. Talia Hale was beautiful, and could be pretty tough if you didn’t do your job, but Stiles loved what he did too.

Network administration wasn’t for everyone, but Stiles saw doing it for a rapidly growing business as a challenge. The pay was nothing to sneeze at either. At this rate, his student loans would be paid off in half the time, and Talia always listened if Stiles needed something. Especially new equipment.

The only problem with Talia was that she kept trying to set him up with her son.

“Derek’s an artist. He lived in New York, but he moved back home for a change of scenery.” She would say. Stiles didn’t have to be a genius to figure out that it was a lie.

Stiles might even have agreed to it. He hadn’t had a boyfriend since graduation and the guy he’d been seeing had taken off to backpack around China. Stiles was so sexually frustrated, it wasn’t even funny anymore. But…

Stiles was interested in someone else And they had something going. Well…kinda.

About a month after graduation, Stiles had been out with his friends. Somehow, he’d managed to bag a guy way, way out of his league at the first bar, and the rest of the night was a happy blur.

The sex had been amazing, but as Stiles was leaving he saw a beautiful woman pull into the driveway he’d just left. Stiles had very serious rules about not sleeping with married guys. Especially not straight married guys.

But he’d never deleted the guy’s number. Stiles didn’t even know his name. Drunk Stiles had just saved the number under 🍆🍆🍆 and Sober Stiles couldn’t think of anything else to use. And sometimes, when Stiles was drunk and lonely and above all horny, Stiles would send him nudes. And the guy would always respond with pictures of his own. Straight married dude or not, he just had a really, really nice dick.

And they did talk! Sorta. Sometimes Stiles would send him memes and the guy would share IT articles. After bad nights, the guy would send little “you feeling okay?” texts. Stiles guessed to make sure he hadn’t drunk himself to death? Stiles didn’t think he was that pathetic. Not yet, anyway.

So maybe Stiles was carrying a torch for a guy he could never be with on multiple levels. The world wasn’t going to end. Now if only he could figure out a way to tell Mrs. Hale that so she’d stop trying to hook him up with Derek.

XXX

“Derek’s going to be at the Christmas party next week.” Talia said, her voice heavy with implication.

Stiles, on his knees under her desk with a flashlight in his mouth as he tried to hook the new telecommunications system to her computer, could only grunt in response.

“You never know what might happen.” Talia continued. “Those stories about the crazy stuff that happen during Christmas parties exist for a reason. She laughed. “My husband and I were interning in the same law office – long before we were married or even dating, of course. We competed, actually. Each trying to best the other. And it all came to a head during the Christmas party that year. I think that was when we conceived our eldest, Laura, actually.”

She laughed again and Stiles began trying to extract himself, just as a woman cried, “Mom!”

A beautiful woman with long, dark hair was walking through Talia’s office door, grimacing at her mother. Stiles almost slipped back under the desk. “Laura” was the same woman Stiles had seen pull into 🍆🍆🍆’s driveway all those months ago!

Not only had Stiles almost been a homewrecker, he had slept with Talia’s son-in-law? Stiles wanted to die of mortification, but he figured that might give him away. Instead, Stiles stood and tried not to look at Laura.

“Try it now, Talia.” He muttered, pushing her chair back towards the desk for her.

Talia alighted on her chair and navigated to the telecom software. The snowy screen and [Network Access Not Found] message were gone, but Talia wasn’t going to let him escape that easily.

She stood and hooked an arm around Stiles’ shoulders, pulling him forward. “Stiles, this is my daughter Laura. Laura, this is Stiles.”

Laura scrutinized him and Stiles could only pray she didn’t somehow recognize him. “It’s nice to meet you, Stiles. You’re the one mom’s been trying to make go on a date with Der, right?”

Stiles winced and nodded. “Uh y-yeah. But as I keep telling her, I’m not really interested.” Because I would do anything to ride your husband’s cock again. Shame boiled hot in Stiles’ stomach.

“Well, you’re definitely his type!” Laura laughed, making Stiles blush. “Whether or not you want to put up with him is another matter entirely. I guess you can always decide at the Christmas party.”

“Laura! Be nice to your brother.” Talia admonished her, though there was a smile on her face. “Speaking of, you and Aaron will be there, right?” Talia asked, and Laura nodded. Aaron? Was that 🍆’s name? Stiles wondered if it would be rude to change it in his phone. Putting it in as “Aaron (Laura’s Husband)” might actually stop Drunk Stiles from sending him any more nudes though. Provided Stiles could avoid both him and Derek at the party. Maybe he just wouldn’t go.

“Anyway, I’ve got to go. I just wanted to drop off the swatches for Lupe’s quinceañera.” Laura said, moving to dig in her bag. Stiles took the opportunity to slip out and run all the way back to his network closet.

XXX

Unfortunately, despite his best efforts, Stiles found himself coming back to work on Friday night, now dressed in jeans and the cheesiest Christmas sweater he could find. The snow walkers had never been Stiles’ favorite part of Star Wars, but there was just something about seeing them in the distinctive crisscross pattern just made them so much better. Plus, showing off the utmost worst of his geekdom might be so unattractive to Derek and Aaron that neither of them would ever mention his name again.

Stiles found the makeshift bar that had been set up in a corner of the largest conference room and immediately added another reason to his list of reasons why Talia Hale was the best boss ever.

The guy in the bright red vest and a pair of light up antlers asked him what drink he wanted and Stiles’ went with the classic brandy and eggnog. Alcohol in hand, Stiles moved through the growing crowd that had spilled over into the main work area.

Stiles was actually starting to have fun talking to a few people that liked his sweater, when Talia found him.

“Stiles? Ah, there you are!” Talia made her way over, the white material of her dress looking even more beautiful under the red and green Christmas lights someone had put up.

There was a tall guy following behind her in the worst Lord of the Rings Christmas sweater Stiles had ever seen. His head was down, but Stiles saw a light beard creeping up over his cheek, so maybe he was Talia’s husband?

“I’m so glad you came!” Talia greeted him, pulling Stiles into a hug. “I was afraid Laura had scared you off.” She released Stiles and motioned to the man now standing beside her. “Stiles, this is my son Derek. Derek, Stiles.”

The guy looked up and Stiles’ jaw went slack. Derek Hale stood in front of him, but there were also had almost a dozen pictures of him on Stiles’ phone in all their jacked, dark haired, and big dicked gory. Those eyebrows were unmistakable.

Derek looked about as shocked as Stiles felt, and Stiles was glad that he at least wasn’t alone. “Y-you’re Derek?” Stiles finally squeaked.

“You forgot my name?” Derek asked, looking both annoyed and hurt.

Before Stiles could reply, he noticed Talia’s same distinctive eyebrows (how had he not noticed?!) creeping up toward her hairline. “You two already know each other?” She asked, voice so curious she almost sounded accusing.

Stiles could see the slight panic in Derek’s eyes and jumped in before he could think better of it. “R-right before I was hired here. We just danced a little at a club.”

Stiles could tell from Talia’s expression that she wasn’t fooled, but all she said was, “Oh. Well then why don’t I leave you two alone to get caught up then?” Before either of them could speak, she disappeared into the crowd.

As soon as Talia was out of earshot, Derek turned back to him. “You seriously forgot my name?” This time, Stiles could just hear the note of anxiety under Derek’s words. Still…

“Obviously you forgot mine too. Stiles isn’t exactly a common name.” Stiles shot back, folding his arms.

“When I peeked at your driver’s liscense after you fell asleep, all it said was Mieczyslaw.” Derek argued, and Stiles didn’t have a good answer to that. “How come I didn’t hear from you for months?” He asked, sounding more accusing with each word.

Stiles flushed and ducked his head in embarrassment. “I thought you were married…”

Derek was so surprised; he let his folded arms drop. “You what? Why?”

“I saw Laura pull into your place that morning.” Stiles admitted, folding his arms and hugging out his annoyance at himself. “You were already so far out of my league, I guess the idea you were married seemed logical.”

“But you still liked me enough to ask for dick pics?” Derek asked with one eyebrow raised.

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Drunk Stiles is an amoral dick controlled by his dick. Besides, you always responded.”

Derek’s jaw tightened and he looked down at his shoes. He stayed that way long enough for Stiles to wonder if that would just be that. Just as Stiles opened his mouth to excuse himself, Derek looked up. “Well then, how about Sober Derek takes Sober Stiles out for dinner, and we see what happens?”

Stiles only had to think about it for about two seconds before reaching out and slipping his hand into Derek’s.

[anti-savebendy-blog]

Thoughts on Solar Sand's "Cringe of the World - Bendy and the Ink Machine" Video.

Why, hello there! I should have expect to receive this ask as well :)I follow @sometimesdiscourseisunbearble, so my thoughts on it probably aren’tmuch different than theirs, and they are much better with words than I am!But I’ll still try and tell you some of my own thoughts as good as I can:

The game itself!Not far into the video he says “if a bunch of people think your characterin a horror game is cute, don’t you think you’ve failed?”And again, @sometimesdiscourseisunbearble explains why this is wrong in an answer to an ask. And I have tocompletely agree to that.I’m not a big fan of FNAF, but those characters are cute too. And their cutenessdoesn’t make it less scary when they jump out at you, or stare at you throughone of the cameras. FNAF 2 is a good example because there they are EVENFUCKING CUTER. What scares me in a horror game aren’t spooky looking monsters…I can get used to their appearance at one point and don’t care a bit abouttheir “oohhh so scary”-look.I think its atmosphere. And atmosphere is what we have in BATIM.SS also says that the game is bland and that in the first chapter almostnothing happens.And yes, almost nothing happens.And you know what? I’ve watched Jacksepticeye play it BEFORE I decided to getthe game myself.And I still shit my pants, even though I knew what was going to happen! Nothingbut a few little jump scares here and there… or sometimes I just jumped when Henrystarted speaking. God damnit, Henry!But that’s exactly what it is, it’s atmosphere! The feeling of “something mighthappen”. And yeah, I know very well that I’m a pussy. I never really played anyhorror games in my life so far, so I probably get a lot more scared in BATIMthan someone who is more experienced with the genre.And “basing your opinion on an art style” is apparently not a good reason tolike something. I like the art style and the characters and I want to know moreabout it all. He just really doesn’t seem to like the game overall…“You have to complete a very simple puzzle”, well yes. It’s just the firstlevel of the game; it has to warm you up. You can’t put people into a gamewhere you’re stuck at the very first level and get people frustrated as hell.It just sets you up for the rest of the game. In chapter 2 the puzzle (with the instruments) got quitea bit harder in my opinion. But I’m also not the brightest, so that might alsobe why it took me a bit longer so understand that I had to turn on the projector.He then goes on complimenting the game, saying it does have somewhat of anatmosphere and is visually interesting. Saying he might change his view of itin the future, when more chapters are released, but that the game so far isaverage.And that’s absolutely fine.BATIM is of course not the best game of all time, but also not the worst.And maybe it’s just this famous now because Mark and Sean played it. What’s wrong with that? If the game wasn’t appealing to some then it wouldn’tmatter who played it. If people didn’t like some aspects of the game itwouldn’t be this big.It’s fine that SS doesn’t like it that much. Some of his critique wasn’t reallynecessary imo, but whatever.

Art!So, first off, I know that SS hates fetish art and somehow manages to dig outthe worst parts of it in any fandom. Things I too wouldn’t want to see, or arereally just bad. But there is often no need for him to call them out on that,other than “Wow, look what I found. Look at this gross shit!”Unless the artist doesn’t even tag it as NSFW, or doesn’t put the mature filterover it. He even asked one artists why he doesn’t do that at one point (not inthis video, but a different one) and that escalated quite a bit, with theartist telling him that DA is a porn site… *facepalm*So SS isn’t always wrong. Heck, it’s his opinion and an opinion can’t be“wrong”. And telling someone to tag something as nsfw and checking the filterfor it sure is the right thing to do, and the artist disagreeing is plain dumb.But NSFW in general will exist in any fandom. And bad art too, there is nodenying that.He sometimes gives kind of good criticism. It sure could be better, I guess.I’m not the best critique either! But I can’t find ANY of that in this video. He simply complains about howboring and uncreative the game is, shows us some OC’s (some of which are drawVERY WELL might I add!) and complains about them as well… and of course aboutthe NSFW stuff, because that’s just what he seems to hate the most.I actually had to laugh a bit when he explained us the picture where Bendy seemsto cum out of his eyes??? Omg??? That sounds hilarious.And the Necrophilia… I don’t think I can or want to judge anyone on that,because I too shipped some things when I was still into Undertale that some ofyou will hate me for. (and no, no childporn stuff. That’s a no-no.)But hey, everyone their own, right? As long as no real people get hurt, whereis the problem?I’m not surprised that he hates on that stuff. Since I know very well that heisn’t into fetish or porn art at all anyway. Which, again, is fine. But criticizingits existence is just unnecessary.The OC’s…Like I said, from the examples he showed in the video, some aren’t drawn bad atall.Some other BATIM OC’s don’t even have Pac-Man eyes, though. Because people“modernize” them and give them normal white eyes with a black pupil. (I know this has a name, but I forgot)And one of them is obviously a younger person new to art.Instead of giving feedback on what to do better, he just complains about them,also saying pretty stupid stuff like “All of them look like Bendy withdifferent head shapes”.Solar Sands, do you need some glasses, maybe?And the “weird piece of art” most likely was a re-drawing of some meme withBendy and I’m-not-sure-who in it.

He shows us some fan video made with Lego, which seems really cute.Looks like something I would have done when I was a kid! For a while I used tomake short stop motion videos with my toys…I should actually go and find the video and watch it myself.What he says about the Source Filmmaker videos isn’t actually that bad either?I don’t watch many of them myself, so I can’t tell if all of them are like thator if he just searched for the “worst ones”.(I want to add that I don’t actually think of them as bad. )The animation for Bendy’s mouth bugs me in these almost as much as it bugs SS,so the critique there isn’t that bad. Pointing out when something looks weirdis fine. He could have said how to make it better, but he probably knows asmuch about Source Filmmaker as I do.I’m not a big fan of rap battles or any of those VS videos. I don’t watch them,so I don’t have much to say to that.WHAT I’M ACTUALLY VERY HAPPY ABOUT THOUGHis after all that when he makes fun of that stupid repost-or-ignore-picture.“If ignoring this post means Bendy’s death… and I hated this post in the firstplace, then that’s a win-win situation!”A true “win-win situation” is something where both sides of a party winsomething. So Solar Sands is wrong about that… but whatever, he made fun ofthose #save//bendy assholes, so that’s cool, right?(Although I don’t want Bendy to die, but you get what I mean)In the end he shows us some creations he liked:DAGames’s song “Build our machine”, calling it catchy “but it can getannoying”.Alright…?I’m actually interested to know what he thinks is annoying. I don’t mean thisin a “this song isn’t annoying!”-way, but I genuinely would like to know what hemeans.I’m a big fan of the song and I really like Caleb Hyles’ cover for it! Morethan DAGames actually, but it’s still very good.He then compliments some of the animations and leaves us with something thatlooks like some badly drawn meme. And whether or not it’s supposed to look thatbad, it just adds to it, making it pretty funny. Boi.

TL;DROverall his video was fine.He shared his opinion with people… although I think he was a bit too harsh atsome points and I was missing actual feedback. Like many other videos of himit’s mostly just complaining with some nice words here and there.In some videos before this he gave actual feedback to people. Again, maybe notthe best, but he tried. But here…I disagree with things he said, but I’m not mad that he doesn’t like it.Although, I’m not sure if this really comes across like that, looking at thiswall of text;;;;What I fear is, that his video might give more fuel to anyone who supports#save//bendy. Even if he made fun of the repost-post, I’ve already seen peoplein the comments saying how they want to save the fandom or that it is too lateetc…

[thanksforthefush-blog]

The UnDefinitive Guide to Kiwi Slang

TLDR: No one understands half the things WE are saying so Linda makes a list.

As I have found out in my time in America so far, many of my commonly used Kiwi slang is non-existent here (in fact, most people don't even know what I mean when I refer to myself as a Kiwi). I decided to write this post when I told a friend of mine I was "up to fucks" which in retrospect, can be totally misconstrued as something akin to hoe-ing around.

So I thought I'd compile a nifty list of Kiwi slang I use on a regular basis. Even for some Kiwis, a lot of the slang I use may not be used in a particular part of New Zealand. There is also a lot of Kiwi slang that I don't use which I won't include (for instance, 'tu meke' or 'hard out' and honestly you could probably write a book on Kiwi slang). Heck, for all I know, some of these could be used in other parts of America seeing as I have only used these on the East and West Coast and the sample size doesn't really encompass the entirety of America.

1. Flatmates, Flatting, Flat

Basically, any phrase with the word 'flat'. In America, they use roommates instead of flatmates, they say sharing a house/room or living together instead of just saying flatting together and you refer to your dwelling as a house, apartment, rowhome, or whatever instead of just saying flat. I asked someone what you call it when you go flatting ie. move out of home and quite literally you say "I'm living away from home'. In all honesty, having an umbrella term makes it much more versatile and people find it super charming when I say flatmate.

2. Sweet As

Meaning anything along the lines of "all good", "sounds good", "that's cool", "no problem" - basically any term that implies a good-natured confirmatory response .Zoe used this in her work emails for weeks before her senior cracked and finally asked her what she meant by "sweet as". People think I mean "sweet ass" which when used in place of "sweet as", makes no sense:

"Hey Linda, could you take out the trash please?"

"Sweet ass" - it just doesn't work.

3. Churr bro

Similar to "sweet as"  above - people just ask me if I'm just pronouncing the word 'cheers' funny.

4. Crook

This word is ingrained in my everyday vernacular, and is so versatile in its use that when someone finally asked me what I meant when I used it, I struggled to think of a definition that didn't contain the word crook ("You know, like when someone is a bit crook?"). Thankfully for Google, their definition is pretty much spot on - “(especially of a situation) bad, unpleasant or unsatisfactory".

Feel hungover or poorly? You're feeling crook. 

Know a dodgy fulla? He's crook.

You did something that would probably constitute as unsavoury? You're crook.

5. Yeah Nah, Nah Yeah

Where "yeah nah" = no, "nah yeah" = yes. It's all in the tone and inflections, where the yeah has to sound a little promising with a slightly higher pitch and the nah has to drop a few octaves and trail off.

6. Durry

No one here uses the term durry and everyone that I've used this term in front of loves it and thinks it sounds fancy as fuck. Americans just use the term cig, cigarette, smoke, whatever and also pronounce it as 'durr-ree' as opposed to 'duh-ree'.

7. Battling

When one is attempting to complete an arduous task and still manage to somehow muster the energy to complete said task. This term is mainly used after a loose Friday night, you wake up feeling like death  but you still manage it to make it to brunch the next day and maintain some semblance of humanity, and when someone asks you if you're okay because you're fully aware that you not only feel��like death but you look like death as well, you flash them a half grin and whisper "I'm battling" and they give you a look of compassion and understanding because you still managed to be somewhat of a productive human being despite dying inside.

8. Rinsed

For when the term "drunk" doesn't quite encapsulate the absolute state you're in because you're positively smashed, you say you're rinsed. In America, there may be other terms to encompass this state of being but I've only heard the term "super drunk" which I guess suffices for all intent and purpose.

9. Too Easy

A friend of mine currently working in LA would respond to his seniors asking him to complete a task with "too easy". To most Kiwis, it is simply yet another confirmatory response, akin to 'sweet as'. His American colleagues made a complaint because they thought he was making a mockery out of the tasks they asked of him.

10. Keen

Akin to saying "I'm down" in America. When someones asks if you want to partake in anything, a typical response would be "Yeah I'm keen" or "keen as".

11. Skull/Dense

Still not really sure what Americans use in lieu of these terms but it refers to finishing off a beverage extremely quickly, usually alcoholic in nature - "I'm going to skull/dense this bottle of wine in 10 seconds, a magic trick I like to call the disappearing act."

12. Stitched Up

When someone puts you into an unsavoury situation, they are 'stitching you up'. I usually do this to Zoe by tagging her in obscene memes because she has her mum and Nan on Facebook, who have like 100 friends, and so whatever dank meme I tag Zoe in is sure to appear on their Facebook -  in a sentence, this would be "Linda stitched up Zoe". Or when your friend shares something with someone he wasn't supposed to and that person ends up bringing it up with you, it means your friend stitched you up.

13. Up to Fucks

Perhaps the most misconstrued term of them all, 'up to fucks' means you're up to nothing, you're procrastinating, something of that essence.

"Linda it's been 6 weeks, have you found a job?"

"Nah mate, I'm up to fucks."

14. Dodgy

In America, people use the term 'sketchy'. It means when something/someone/somewhere is potentially dangerous or dishonest.

15. Pack

I don't know how commonly this is used in NZ, but it is a commonly used term in my group of friends. It means to leave, ditch or not bother with someone or something. For instance, if Zoe ends up at Mish Mosh while everyone else wants to go to Cavern Club, a common phrase in our social circle is "Pack Zoe". Or if you're saying it to Zoe yourself, "Zoe we're packing you" or "Zoe, you're packed".

16. Benching

Equivalent in America to "on the back burner". When you're talking with someone you're not quite ready to pursue but you're not ready to lay down some groundwork either, you're benching them.

17. Wop Wops

The middle of nowhere. Synonymous to "bumblefuck" in America.

"Linda, did you get lost again? Where are you?'

America: "I somehow ended up in East Bumblefuck"

Kiwi: "I'm in the fucking wops"

18. Piss

'On the piss' = I'm drinking so if someone asks you what you're up to, you respond with "I'm on the piss".

'Pissed' = while this could also mean you're annoyed, context is key. In our instance, it means you're drunk.

These are not to be confused with "taking the piss" which means you're making fun of someone in good humour, you're joking, providing a bit of banter.

"Linda honestly, please stop making jokes about no one ever loving me."

 "Honestly Zoe, mate, I'm just taking the piss."

19. MEAN

When something is cool, awesome, some sort of positive adjective. Your mate produces a mint piece of artwork and to show your support and enthusiasm for his woke, artistic endeavours, you tell him "it looks fucking mean".

20. Ay?

This one is a little tricky because it's a very multi-use term.

It turns any phrase into pretty much a question: "Hey you don't want that ay?" you ask, while hungrily staring at the slice of pizza your friend has left on her plate.

Or when you're only 90% sure of an answer but you don't want to seem too confident on the off-chance that you're wrong, "oh it's 387 ay?" so in the 10% chance you're wrong, you don't seem too wrong because you said 'ay?' and that softens the blow.

Or when you're expressing disbelief at something:

Zoe: "Linda I made a friend today."

Me: "AY?????"

21. Dairy

A convenience/corner store. When you're too lazy to go to the supermarket and you're willing to pay the 9000% markup on the shitty Big Ben pies, you head off to your local dairy to pick up a pie and maybe a Starz drink too.

23. Feed

A meal or food - "Hey you keen for a feed?" or in normal terms "Are you down to grab a bite to eat?"

22. Shot

This one is a little tricky because it can be used in place of saying 'thank you' but it could also be used to commend your mate when he does something worth applauding.

"I picked us up a mean feed on the way home." to which someone could reply "Shot!" or "Linda I got to level 80 in World of Warcraft" to which I would respond "Shot bro!"

23. Shout

Not to be confused with 'shot' above, but to 'shout' means to treat someone. "Hey I'm keen for some Denny's tonight. Your shout?"

24. I reckon

Similar to saying "I think" or to agree wholeheartedly with someone.

"I reckon that I could dense this jug of mojitos by myself" - where here it's like saying "I think..."

Or "Honestly Linda, using Sprite Blast to make mojitos was a genius idea." which I would respond with, "Yeah I reckon!" to wholeheartedly agree that a winner mojito recipe is 1 part mojito to 4 parts Sprite Blast (NOTE it has to be Sprite Blast) with a bit of lemon juice and mint is bloody delicious.

25. Not Even

It's like saying "No way!" or "I can't believe it!".

Zoe: "Linda I managed to look like a 4/10 today."

Me: "Not even!"

26. Gap

It means 'to leave' and makes much more sense in context:

"Gap it g." when you're angry at your mate and you are telling them to vacate your immediate vicinity.

"I'm gapping it/I gotta gap" for when you have to leave.

27. Heaps

To express a large quantity, or frequency.

"How much do you love Harry Potter?" and you respond with "Heaps."

So in this context, I'm saying I love Harry Potter a lot, or very much. Or "How often have you gotten shit-faced this week Linda?" and I would respond with "heaps of times."

28. What a stink/sad guy

When your mate has done some stitching up, you say they're a 'stink/sad guy'.

 "Zoe, I've packed you and have found a new best friend."

"What a stink guy :("

29. Gutted

To express disappointment at someone, a situation, something.

"Densed two bottles of wine and now can't bring myself to drink wine anymore, I'm so gutted." or "Linda I'm coming with you to America" and you're just like "Oh gutted."

30. Can't be bothered/fucked/assed

I thought everyone used these terms but this one is a hit or miss with some people here. I asked my flatmate what the equivalent is and she said it would be somewhat equivalent to "when you don't give a fuck" but it basically means when you just don't wanna do something because you're lazy.

"Linda are you going to try figure out what you're gonna do with you life?"

"Honestly I just can't be bothered."

31. SEND IT

100% not even Kiwi slang but a commonly used phrase in my social circle. Very similar to dense/skull but deserves it on place on this list. This phrase is derived from one afternoon of day drinking where a typical Kiwi bloke no one really knew turned up to a party, got rinsed and passed out by 3pm but not before he encouraged everyone to "send it". It is simultaneously a cue to finish the entire contents of the drink in one's hand and also saying 'cheers' - a very versatile phrase that should definitely be employed in the rest of New Zealand's slang vocabulary.

A great instance for which this phrase should be used is when you're the sober driver for day 1 of an 8 day bender, and your friends have been polishing off a bottle of tequila and 2 cases of beer before you've even had a drop of alcohol (so much alcohol was consumed in said vehicle that as I was being breathalysed, it thought I was over the alcohol limit even though I was dead sober). You have to play the catch-up game real quick and your mates are real supportive of you and telling you "to fucking send it" for encouragement as you dense a bottle of wine in what you would refer to as your best disappearing magic trick yet. Bless.

So there we have it. There are so many other slang terms commonly used in New Zealand and a quick Google search would bring up other lists compiled by other Kiwis but honestly, it varies so much across New Zealand so I wanted to create a list unique to how I talk. It makes for great conversation pieces because I've had hours of long conversations with people who are fascinated by the slang that I use and how fancy they think it sounds (even though in New Zealand, there is nothing fancy about saying "bro, you keen for a mean feed? Your shout? Shot bro.").

[sketchesandnonesense]

rambly post that might be slightly les coherent than other ones bc i’m v v sleepy n out of it n Not Feeling Well

all those who don’t wanna read bout me bein an Anxious Fucker look away now

w e l p 

I feel like I’ve covered this already but i still feel like i shit friend

I’ve been neglecting so many of my buds like hella

I haven’t actively initiated a fuckin convo since 1912 

and even then they don’t last v long bc I’m shit

n idk what’s wrong w/ me as of late

my depression feels more Crushing than fucking ever

my Anxiety is sky fucking high because work is a goddamned mess I have 0 life and I’m v much feeling like i’m purposelessly floatin through life

Tonight was manageable

though that’s all i really asked for

I did a spell, a simple one, for the last hour of my shift to be empty so we could clean n everything. that no matter what today threw at me, I’d manage. 

and I did

i promised my Will would outlast my lipstick

and it did

till i got home, wiped off my lipstick, and took a nap

then i woke up disoriented and not feelin that great n all my anxiety hit me like a goddamned truck it was gr8 rlly

Work is so fucking draining i hate it 

I don’t know which i hate more

morning shift or late shift

both are fucking awful because my job is fucking awful and i wish i wasn’t fucking scared of driving long distances in my shitty little focus otherwise I’d be trying to find literally anywhere fucking else to work

I’d love to do comissions n art shit for money but lmao my art ain’t that fucking good

n everybody knows there’s atleast 40 other artists with better art and more dire circumstances that could use the fucking income more than my stupid ass so whatever

n lmao getting a legit job doing art would be A. a bitch and a half bc See Above and I’d get so anxious i’d chicken out applying

so

shitty subway job it is 

for shitty ol me

bluh

i feel 17 kinda gross n tired n long for the sweet embrace of death

though i don’t REALLY wanna die

I just REALLY want to get replaced

like

someone takes up my place so nobody realizes i’m gone so i can die Guilt Free 

someone better than me

someone better at art and music and talking and being a decent person

someone not me

I hate this i hate feeling like this i hate feeling weighed down n like my spine’s gonna snap n like my head is full of static and wool

i wish there was something i could take that could make it go away but haha like that’s ever gonna happen

i can barely remember to take the ONe med i have to worry bout on time

I’d never be able to get into a routine 

Ive always been rlly bad bout routines

i never rlly have one

I used to always take a shower at 9:00 n head to bed at 11:00ish 

though anymore It’s an accomplishment i take a shower at all n don’t put it off till tomorrow or worse still not take one then and wait till i feel Absolutely Disgusting n my hair looks gross enough i know people will notice at work

I’m just

so fucking gross everything about me is and of course none of y’all can see that bc y’all only get my Highlights Reel selfies most of the time w/ filters n angles

good thing i don’t have a LDR otherwise they’d be DEEPLY underwhelmed once they met me irl lmao 

speaking of relationships

guess who’s been getting Them Mushy Stupid Feelings again???

and guess who’s depression has been kicking her in the teeth for it??

this bitch

bc lemme explain here

I still rlly like the idea of a relationship or atleast having someone i can call my own n make stupid jokes w/ bout it n all that Jazz

but

the person i got these mushy feelings for

I’m still not Totally Sure how they feel bout me bc well

we did talk bout it alot but

i’m still just like

Doubt

like

was it all just bull so I wouldn’t feel bad??

was I creepy as fuck??????

were the feelings returned then but gone now????

were there ever really Feelings or was it just v v little crush-y thing while I’m over here in a big heap of Garbage feeling like my heart’s going to fucking fall apart 

does he still feel that way bout me??

would he tell me the truth if i asked?

ugh jsut

i hate it

and that ain’t the end of it oh no

it gets worse

bc I worry bout him

alot

bc shit’s goin down in his life n I hate to pry but im a nosy bitch n idk how to help like??? is he the typa person to talk bout this sorta thing or should i go straight for Distract w/ Memes ???????????

I also worry I’ve been creepy and/or annoying and/or shitty n made him Not Like Me

and I’m trying so hard to be like “I don’t need validation from anyone if they like me they do if they don’t then they don;t”

but at the same time

I’m always a slut for Positive Attention

so you see my dillema

bluh

I wish i could be nicer to myself i know everyone wants me to be nicer to myself but it’s so fucking hard 

especially recently bc it feels like the voice in my head ordered a fucking megaphone off amazon w/ 2 day shipping and now the fucker is 3x as loud

so instead of creeping little thoughts that bug me n make me sad I have a loud ass voice over everything else in my head telling me i’m awful

i should be a better friend

I don’t deserve all the good things i have

I should stop being a fucking crybaby

 I’m so disgusting how could anyone ever like me

I shouldn’t bother trying to get into a relationship, I’ll only let the other person down 

people you’ve turned down or people who turned you down dodged a real bullet not having to deal with you 

you clingy, manipulative, whiny, pessimistic, pile of garbage

why does anyone even stay around you it’s so rare you’re even worth noticing

your art’s so mediocre why do you even keep trying you know it won’t get any better

stop bothering trying to accept yourself you know you hate how you look and you find yourself disgusting don’t try to fool yourself or anyone else

you’re such an absolute disgrace of a human being you shouldn’t even exist

and it feels like it jsut keeps getting louder with these thoughts pounding on my head like i thought it was bad before but now I hear it full blast

like I was wearing a diving helmet that leaked 

now i’ve taken it off and I’m suffocating

you’re not a real witch

you’re stupid for believing you can do anything with afew little words and “feeling” anything

those little poppets you made won’t help your depression n the rocks you bought won’t make the voice stop

why even bother if you’re not going to actually try 

you didn’t even research that much did you

you just want to say you’re a witch and act like you have some sort of power when really you’re just as sad and pathetic as you were before you started thinking your childhood halloween costume was something more

you can’t commit to anything

it’s pathetic

any time your little “spells” work it’s coincidence and you know it. you don’t know what you’re doing and you don’t have any power in anything. just give up already

I wish i knew what to do to get the voice to stop or atleast to put the diving helmet back on but i don’t know how to fix it I don’t know how to get it to stop for good

I don’t know why this is happening there’s no reason for it

maybe it’s because I fell in love and it made me weak n more susceptible to Everythign Else

who the fuck knows bc i don’t

I’m so exhausted

writing all this out has helped alot, n so has this soda i grabbed from downstairs

so 

the thoughts are finally out of my head and somewhere else

good

then i can read them over and over again 

and try and fight back but

it’s hard

it’s so hard to fight myself

it’s hard to fight thoughts that force their way into my head like facts

blah

the thoughts have died down

they’re quieter again

i can still see them through the glass of my diving helmet and they tap on the glass but

they’re more manageable now

though

some are still clinging to the back of my mind

mostly the ones on love since that’s what I’ve been so stupidly hung up on lately

i guess it’s just because I’ve been wanting affection for so long just

wanting someone that I fell in love w/ like that that would love me back

that i got hung up on the first person who i thought maybe shared the same feelings but now i’m not entirely sure even though I know what they said my brain is still jumbling things up and making it hard to sort through

tho if you’re reading this ya nosy lil fucker n you know who you are

shoot me a skype message so i know i haven’t managed to be So Incredibly Draining you never wanna talk again

or don’t rlly

it doesn’t matter in the end i guess

it’s obvi a possibility i’m just a super draining person n it’s nobody’s fault

I still wonder though if you get as nervous as i do sometimes

maybe I’m just being dumb

maybe I’m just so disgustingly infatuated with the idea of love and relationships I’m projecting 

maybe I’m just hoping so badly that some cute, stupid thing i read in a story could happen to me 

because i think about that alot

wishing and wishing that some day I’d be part of a bigger story

that something would Happen and my life would have some sort of narrative or meaning to it that would feel satisfying

like there was fate i was meeting with

but

I guess me n fate just can’t seem to make plans quite right

I should probably just finish my soda and head off to bed

or atleast try

maybe stay up on my phone n watch weird DIY videos on youtube bc that tends to happen alot

i know I’ll never actually get to doing any of them n have no intention of it but

still fun to watch other people have fun making things

or destroying them in some cases

if you poor soul make it to the bottom of this post congrats

here’s a link to the song I’ve been listening to for the majority of writing this that’s kinda helped w/ my anxiety alittle

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5IEt63qOSI

been listening to alotta big bad voodoo daddy lately

got good music