#backhanded compliments

[lgbtqreads]

Exclusive Cover Reveal: Backhanded Compliments by Katie Chandler

Today on the site I’m thrilled to reveal the cover of Backhanded Compliments by Katie Chandler, a speculative Sapphic tennis romance releasing June 10, 2025 from Atria Books! Here’s the story: A steamy debut sapphic sports romance with a light speculative twist, in the vein of One Last Stop and Expiration Dates, in which bitter tennis rivals Juliette Ricci and Luca Kacic realize they are…

[unofficial-lesbian-god]

Greetings, my children!

Today I had the lovely experience of a compliment from my sister. This was so rare, that I earned an achievement. She told me 'You look like a boy lesbian.' I couldn't be happier with my uneducated younger sister.

[pratchettquotes]

"You haven't got the morals of a cat, Gytha Ogg."

"Now, Esme, you know that's not true."

"All right. You have got the morals of a cat, then."

"That's better."

Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

[searchingforhere]

The best compliment I have ever received to this day is "Thank you for being yourself, it has made me comfortable enough to be myself."

And after getting a lot of "Wow, you're so brave." and "I could never" (I'm from the South in the U.S these are in fact derogatory statements about how one should NOT be doing those things.)

It was nice that me being me was finally a good thing.

[idunforslindart]

They always confess it like it's some great sin as well, like "it's so weird, I can't explain it, but... You're attractive!" Like yes Mike I fucking know now go away.

[mattsmemes]

[thornestar]

Had a girlfriend tell me in all sincerity that she was soooo into me and this was unusual because she never saw herself dating someone with crooked teeth. I only have ONE crooked tooth 🫨

I never thought about it until she said that! Insecure people focus on the strangest things!

Slip me your tip?

Or commission me for your own cash app Tip fucker! $20 +$10 color + $5 color alterations. Discounts offered for SWrs and broke ass queers.

[kazifatagar]

X User Now Tired of Backhanded Compliments for Speaking Good English 

A popular Malaysian X user, who is in the medical industry, stated that someone asked her about her race, and then told her that she speaks good English. This is seen as something offensive to many as it is an inappropriate remark to make.  X user tired of backhanded compliments  Speaking multiple languages is Malaysian's national identity.— Oh Chee Peng ♻️ 🌎 (@ohcheepeng) September 22,…

[sirlonius]

You are delicious, soft, and flaky as hell. Baby, you a croissant 🥐.

[saturdaynighttit]

“your hair looked so much better natural” ok but the color i choose to wear now makes me feel confident and i changed it for myself and not for you. Can i proceed?

[thelightofatlantis]

“You can pull it off!” you should have just called me an ugly hag instead and been DIRECT

[leescheyenne]

Guildford complimenting Jane

+

Bonus: Jane complimenting Guildford

[hikaaa-bi]

i know the whole “he doesn't like being stared at” is supposed to be spooky, but i'm just imagining Mr Bonzo being super self-conscious and breaking into tears the moment someone makes eye contact with him.

[sparkle-jules]

Thank you for this! I spent 20 minutes this morning making a clip compilation of this and I dropped my phone and it turned off and I don't think I've been more angry in a while. 😂

[x]

[amphoraeus]

The Gerudo king.

[ahb-writes]

Subtext is important. If the character voice is distinct and the author's grasp of tone is solid, then subtext will come through quite naturally.

hey i was wondering if you could please give me some advice on writing subtext for dialogue? like you know how you read those scenes where characters are saying one thing but mean another and there’s that underlying tension or banter etc? do you have any advice on writing that kind of thing into the scene? thank you!

Creating Subtext in Dialogue

Subtext in dialogue occurs when a character says one thing but means another, and the reader is aware of the conflict between what's being said and what's actually meant.

This means the reader either has to have prior context so that they can spot the conflict between what's being said and what's actually meant, or the conflict must be hinted at using body language or facial expressions that suggest the character is not being truthful. (For example, looking away/being unable to maintain eye contact, swallowing, rubbing back of neck, biting lip, frowning, sighing, rolling eyes, etc.)

There are many reasons a character might not directly say what they want to say: -- they're hiding something, like their own secret or someone else's -- they're sugar coating a hard truth to protect someone's feelings -- they're making an indirect accusation to save face if they're wrong -- rules/conventions prevent them from saying what they want to say -- they're masking anger-related emotions with passive aggression like backhanded compliments, weaponized kindness, sarcasm, subtle digs, patronizing comments, unsolicited advice/opinions.

Have fun with your story!

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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