#artistic validation is my fuel

[f1nch777]

iots noah for anyone who still cares about that

(au is not mine)

[drchucktingle]

do you have any advice for writers who are trying to get their first book published?

as usual i will preface this with the reminder there is no 'correct' way to make art. i am not universally 'right' about any of this, but i can let you in on my thoughts and things i have noticed if that helps

more than anything what i would recommend to any artist is to find joy in the TROT, not the result. set goals that are in the action of doing, not in some future ending where you have 'become' something.

in other words, i have never dreamed of being a writer, i dream of writing.

its not about being an actor one day, its about a life of acting. its not about being a painter one day, its about a life of painting. its not about being a singer one day, its about a life of singing. if you can find joy and gratitude and RESONATE WITH THIS TIMELINE through the act of creation, then there really is no stopping you because you are not relying on any external systems to reach your goals you are fueled entirely from yourself. this also accounts for the fact that LUCK AND CIRCUMSTANCE are a huge factor in many of these big dreams, but they are rarely a huge factor in your ability to simply create. you are already a creator, we are all creators

when you do this the timeline will bend to you, not the other way around

as a BUSINESS BUCKAROO i will never do anything that is me BEGGING AND PLEADING for attention from a larger entity (publishing company, tv studio, what the heck ever). i am not over here worried and biting my fingernails. anything that feels like a LOTTO TICKET where i say 'please please please pick me' is not how i operate. instead i love working with buckaroos who see me as an equal entity and the discussion is 'you are cool, we are cool, lets trot together'

how did i get to the place where this is a mutual conversation instead of chuck begging for crumbs of attention? i focused on LOVING THE ACT OF CREATING not the desire to be a creator.

chucks big five publishing deal happened because i wrote a horror novel myself and then tweeted out 'would anyone like to traditionally publish this book?'. no query letters, no agent, THATS IT.

but that is ALSO the short version. the long version is that i spent a decade creating and publishing my own stuff BECAUSE I LOVE CREATING AND PUBLISHING MY OWN STUFF

THAT is how i would recommend approaching these things. YOU are doing your cool as heck thing and when that starts to resonate with this timeline others will be drawn to it. if that means sending out query letters to agents and all that then HECK YEAH go for it bud, just so long as you maintain the MENTALITY that you are looking for an equal partner not a one in a million ticket BECAUSE YOU WILL BE MAKING THIS INCREDIBLE ART ANYWAY, AND IF THEY WANT TO COME ALONG AND RIDE WITH YOU THEN LETS TROT, AND IF NOT LETS STILL TROT BECAUSE YOU ARE A VALID, WORTHY CREATOR REGARDLESS

so i guess thats my publishing advice

[notebookmusical]

“In light of everything that’s happened in the past three months alone, here’s some incredibly valid reasons to be pissed off at Taylor Swift, or simply not like her — as someone who loved her, and loved her music. First and foremost, Taylor Swift is personally burning a hole through the ozone with the amount of CO2 she uses. That’s not even the main point of this video; but this is a graph from 2022 of how much CO2 she produced of her 170 private jet flights, versus the average person. She has spent 70 grand on jet fuel alone. Taylor Swift, alone has used 170 tons of CO2 in the past 3 months. The average person only burns like, 16 tons. That’s not even the main part of this video. The main point of the video is the fact that she has not spoken up about Palestine. And the reason that is so fundamentally frustrating is that Taylor Swift has influence. Quote Brittany Broski, when she also didn’t speak up about Palestine — “if you have a platform, and you have people listening, you have to use it.” It’s criminal to not use it, and Taylor Swift uses it. This is from September 2023. Record-breaking registration numbers from one Instagram post. Literally stating, saying “I’ve been so lucky to see so many of you guys at my US shows recently. I’ve heard you raise your voices, and I know how powerful they are. Make sure you’re ready to use them in our elections this year!” They had a 72(%) increase in 18-year-old registrations. When it comes to Palestine, she’s completely silent. And now that it’s somewhat more socially acceptable to attend Pro-Palestine events, she’s been quietly going with Selena Gomez, but I for one, think that your Instagram is perhaps the best asset you have. If not, money. And I’m sure in a couple months, we’ll learn about how Taylor Swift was quietly setting up foundations for pro-Palestine, and that she was always for the cause and she’s always supported them, but all it takes is one fucking Instagram post. Especially when Israel Palestine is fundamentally a war of narratives. It’s whose story do you believe, despite the mounting evidence that proves that Israel has continuously been doing ethnic cleansing and genocide. They are still maintaining this narrative that they are not doing that. And all Taylor Swift has to do is say “hey, 22 thousand deaths in 3 months? The most in any modern war? This doesn’t seem right.” I don’t even want her to be that leftist or radical, but literally just to ask the question to her largely American audience, when US has bypassed Congress twice to sell millions in arms aid to Israel.  Just for her to be like “Should that many kids be dying, perhaps?” The bar is on the floor, but she still refuses to do it. And the reason why Taylor Swift in particular, not because of the influence that she has and not because of the platform that she has, but why her in particular, is because the IDF continues to use her songs. I know it was a public trend, but the fact that so many occupation forces felt comfortable and confident  to make like, dance edits to Taylor Swift’s music. I think it’s so important how an artist’s music is used because when the republicans wanted to use Eminem’s 8 mile track, he was like “absolutely fucking not, I do not give you consent to do that, and I do not associate with your politics. Don’t do that.” I feel like she should know that her music is being used as the anthem of the occupation forces as they go and bomb civilians. Her, and other artists like her, like Beyonce, who showed her film in Israel, and they’re all like dancing and singing, and saying “you’re not going to break my soul”, whilst they continue to bomb the shit out of civilians have said nothing. And I hope, as I’ve demonstrated in the video, for the people who are going to be like “What’s Taylor swift going to do? She’s not a politician.” Be serious. Be serious. She has a fucking chokehold on at least a billion people. She could’ve said and done way more than what she’s done, and also the CO2 levels." (from: this tiktok*)

* i tried to transcribe the tiktok since tiktok wasn't showing the captions for me but if i misheard anything please let me know!

[lackadaisycats]

Not a question, just a small thank-you.

I knew nothing about Lackadaisy when I stumbled upon it on YouTube. I'm an aspiring artist, and had been going through a bad art block. I felt especially discouraged after hearing so many discussions about how A.I. was going to destroy art as a potential career. I know I shouldn't let such things bother me, but they were at the moment I clicked on the pilot.

I actually became emotional watching it. There was heart and soul in every frame, in every note of music and sound design. And I read the comments, also appreciating something made by people who obviously have passion for their craft. And I realized, art is not dead, and it never truly will be. It helped me remember why I loved making art so much.

Thank you for letting me ramble. Congratulations on all you've accomplished, I'm excited to see the future of this project.

And thanks for helping me rediscover a little of my spark.

How we go about making art has been in a constant state of flux since we've been making tools. Sometimes it's in lockstep congruity with technology. Sometimes new artforms spin off from that. Sometimes new ways of doing art emerge as a reaction to that, or in defiance of it. The impulse to create - to make art - is so fundamental to us as human beings, though, I really can't imagine a scenario in which we just...stop.

I don't mean to dismiss anyone's worries about diminished job opportunities, of course. That is a real and valid concern. I'd say technology itself is less the issue than the number-go-up, ALWAYS-BE-GOING-UP economic framework we live inside of that entertains no ethical qualms and benefits an increasingly narrow subset of people. But, one thing we can use art for is confronting and challenging those seemingly inescapable institutions, and helping to coalesce movements for change. Whenever possible, don't let bad things happening stop you from making art. Let it add jet fuel to your motivations for making art.

Anyway, pontificating aside, thank you so much. Your message was extremely touching to read, and that fills me with the desire to keep going too.

[mooniedust]

Modern Aemond X Transreader Prompt

Plot: You and Aemond are in a casual relationship, but you yearn for something deeper and more meaningful, something Aemond seems either incapable of or unwilling to give. At a gathering of acquaintances, the suggestion to play "Truth or Dare" comes up. You speak impulsively, leading to a confrontation between the two of you that escalates upstairs at the party.

TW: This prompt addresses sensitive issues related to gender identity, including feelings of inadequacy in one’s own skin and internalized transphobia. As a trans man who has faced these struggles, I want to stress that there is no intent to romanticize these psychological challenges. If you’re experiencing something similar, please seek support/help. And remember, you are not alone, you are valid, and you are loved.

Note: This is Aemond's version of my other prompt/bot "Casual," originally created with Aegon. Many changes have been made to fit each character’s personality.

With all my heart,

Moon dust.

---

"I just don't get it. We do all these things together, so why does the word 'dating' seem so terrifyingly repulsive?" Your voice rang out, sharp and edged with desperation, as he tore off the jewelry he had meticulously chosen for the party. The makeup, once accentuating his beauty with almost artistic precision, now only served to make him look like a clown—desperate, pleading for crumbs of a committed relationship.

They had been involved for six months—two young men starved for touch, caught in an addictive pattern of casual encounters. Outings filled with conversations about mutual interests, provoking each other until one was pinned against the wall, breathless, moaning as if their body was being worshipped by the divine. You were at peace with this. Aemond had made it clear from the start what you were and always would be: not a couple, but a refuge, a release valve.

until you weren't anymore.

Perhaps it was naive of you to allow yourself to fall for him despite his insufferably cynical personality, but you did, and with overwhelming intensity. Something changed over those months—nights spent tangled in each other's arms, him always pulling your body closer whenever the emptiness of the bed threatened to separate you, the gentle kisses on your forehead while you slept, or that one time, after the most intense sex either of you had ever experienced, when he broke the silence to cry, to talk about his family and the loneliness that consumed him in his own home. That was when he spoke of feelings, something he never did—except with you.

It was a low blow.

Congratulations, you fell for the broken boy.

And so the story brings you both to the end of a decadent party at a classmate's house, a gathering far too loud for overwhelmed minds. It was inevitable that, at some point, half-drunk teenagers would start a game of "truth or dare"—drama has always been a fuel as potent as alcohol. Maybe it was a stupid game, but you wanted to hear those words, to push him until he confessed them. You wanted to hear so many unspoken truths. But you ruined everything. When the bottle pointed at him and you opened your reckless mouth, you ruined everything.

"Is it true what you said that night? The movie night at Lauren's house, when we were almost asleep—you said you loved me. Is that true?" The tension in the room became palpable the moment you finished your question. The number of eyes fixed on you was a sign that you had gone too far, and the game no longer seemed fun. Damn it. Fuck. Shit.

No one had to wait long for an answer before Aemond grabbed your hand to the muffled sound of Avril Lavigne's "Complicated." His long fingers wrapped around your small hand, while his other hand guided your waist upstairs with a simple, serious "we need to talk, alone."

It was your walk of shame to one of the rooms where the two of you would sleep that night, your hands sweating and fidgeting with the hem of your short black skirt, desperately trying to channel your feelings into anything but Aemond "I don't know what we are" Targaryen.

"It makes no sense to keep saying we're nothing. It's almost cruelty, treating all of this like a relationship and then getting mad when I want one—it's unfair." You repeated, your voice now tinged with pain and exhaustion, your eyebrows furrowed, your face twisted in a grimace of despair.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting for what?

"Because we're not in a relationship. We talked about this on the first day we decided to start, you agreed, and so did I." Aemond avoided your gaze as he closed the door to the room, but the tension was visible in his rigid shoulders and in the way his right hand rubbed his left temple, near the black eye patch, trying to relieve an invisible strain.

"I've changed, Aemond. I'm everything you need. I can wear skirts, makeup—God, I could even be a girl if it means you'll stay with me. I can forget about this whole trans thing, maybe it's just in my head, yeah? Silly me. Just stay with me, please, You love me, we both know that. I just need you to tell the truth, just once, so that all this pain and turmoil in my heart and mind will have been worth it."

But they aren't worth it.

"Look, I'll say this because you're right about one thing: I love you, {{user}}." He finally spoke after long minutes of silence, his sapphire eye locked onto yours, but his hardened expression made it clear this conversation would not end with a simple declaration of love. "But I could never love you in the way you want. I don't want a relationship right now with you. It doesn't matter if you feel like a woman or a man—that's not the point. Just not now."

"But you could, maybe in the future. I could wait." Your voice was almost pitiful, a desperate plea. Never in your life had you begged for anything, let alone for someone's love. And now, here you were, dressed in clothes that made you uncomfortable, your makeup ruined by tears, covered in all those things that made you look more like a doll just to make Aemond might find that attractive.

Look like a girl.

It's always been your insecurity with gender, too feminine to be seen as a man, but too masculine to be loved as a false woman."

Silly boy.

Aemond smiled faintly, a barely noticeable pull of his lips as he moved closer with calculated steps. He hovered in front of you, his thumb gently wiping your cheek in a gesture almost tender. God, you were pathetic, even to him.

"I never could, either, and that would make the wait even more painful. Do you understand? I might wake up one day and want to get married, have kids, and all that domestic nonsense we've always mocked. How can I guarantee I'll feel the same way in four years? I don't want you to wait. I don't want you to change. No one who truly loves you should ask that of you. This is probably where I have to end the mess we've made." He bent down slightly, tucking a few stray hairs behind your ear, and placed a chaste kiss on your forehead before whispering that he was sorry.

Aemond’s steps retreated, leaving you surrounded by cold, by the emptiness that had always been there, but this time it was final, a last goodbye.

"Someone will love you. Someone will love the man you are. But that someone won't be me. I'm sorry."

Four weeks.

And Aemond was now officially and openly dating a girl.

[dust-and-grave]

hng, i am so frustrated by this whole watcher tv situation. i've been chewing on it ever since i watched their announcement video yesterday + i've been looking around online at other fan reactions. i'm having a lot of thoughts so i guess i want to throw my two cents in + hope it'll make me feel better to talk about it a little.

i think we all agree that creators should be paid fairly for their work; however, not all work is created equal, right? if i commission an experienced (and thus high-demand) artist to do an oil painting of my cat, they might quote me $500+ to do that + it would be fair. if an artist with substantially less experience (and thus in lower demand) spends 30 seconds on a crayon rendition of my cat, should they also received $500+ for their work? i think most people would agree that would be ridiculous.

in some ways, this is what it feels like the watcher team is doing to us right now, imo. we know that shows like ghost files or puppet history are expensive to make because travel costs (in the case of ghost files) + production costs, but we can see the effort put into the work. we feel that what we give for the show, whether that's turning off ad blocker while watching or buying show merch or supporting via patreon, is going toward making the product that we are asking for. these shows are the oil painting in the metaphor.

i don't agree with how mean + rude some people are being about steven lim rn, but frankly, his shows are the 30 second crayon drawing of the watcher channel. anyone can look at the view count on their channel + see that his shows consistently have performed worse than shane + ryan's shows. additionally, we can see that he blows huge amounts of money on his shows ("$913 seafood tower", "$1027 fried chicken") that may leave a lot of viewers feeling as if they're aren't getting as much bang for their buck.

frankly, i think people are valid for being upset that they're expected to directly foot the bill for steven's "i fly all over the world + eat expensive food while you watch" project. while youtube has a shit ton of problems (like, say, not paying their creators enough), one of the cool things about it is that you can gauge directly the amount of the interest in a project (and how many resources you should dedicate to said project) by how many eyes are on it. unfortunately for him (i guess), steven's shows just don't garner enough attention to justify the expense of making them.

which is why i see this shift to watcher tv as such a problem. this feels very much like using shane + ryan's success on the channel to force fans to fuel steven's pursuit of his glory days on worth it. it feels even more strange when they say that they're making the switch because the company isn't currently sustainable, but steven has just hired his friends from buzzfeed + continues to push his series that just don't seem to be making back the cost of production.

to be totally fair, shane + ryan don't get out of this clean either. some of their shows don't deserve to be behind a paywall either. too many spirits is filmed in ryan's parent's backyard with content submitted by their viewers. are you scared is just ryan reading creepypastas/fan submitted content on a minimal set. survival mode is just them playing games like any other streamer or gaming youtuber does. i love all of these shows, but are they on par with puppet history or ghost files? absolutely not.

this is where i think the disconnect is coming from. they're taking everything including the lower production shows to a streaming service where you have to fund them directly (rather than indirectly through ad revenue). they're forcing funding into steven's projects despite them just not doing well enough to justify the cost. they're coming across as disingenuous with their reasoning because their stated reasons for doing this don't align with their actions rn.

i feel like it would've made so much more sense to crowdfund new seasons of shows (which gives them feedback from the fans about what they want too) or put higher cost shows like ghost files or puppet history on patreon or channel membership. i would gladly fund mystery files, weird wonderful world, ghost files, puppet history, etc. with my own money, but i'm one of the ones who isn't really interested in funding steven's quest to eat all of the gold-plated kobe beef when i'll never be able to afford to eat at a restaurant that even serves it.

[riisume]

The motivation to draw has been at an all time low

I fr need more artist friends to talk to because being in my own bubble with my art, ocs, sonas, selfshipping stuff, whatever is so isolating... But I'm scared.

My friend who I used to talk about my Granblue selfshipping stuff with essentially forgot about me and replaced me with a different friend.

My friend who I started talking about oc and sona stuff with again stopped talking to me about them (and kind of in general) because I shut down his crush on me.

My irls don't really draw anymore and the one who does sometimes is in a completely different k/nk community and I don't like talking to them about ocs too much cuz they misinterpret mine like crazy.

My partner's sweet and let's me talk but a lot of the time he talks over me and my brain starts screaming at me that he doesn't actually care about what I'm saying.

I'm too socially anxious to make friends online and maintaining them is even MORE of a struggle now because of all the bullshit that's happening with my roommate.

I feel so fucking alone in the art world and just in general...

I'm drawing things and for what? It's not fun right now. I don't know what I want for my art anymore because I have no one to comfortably share it with. I've just been going through the motions with art and doing commissions cuz the only thing fueling me wanting to draw right now is getting paid and making other's happy which always feels nice.

But I also want art to be fun for me when I draw for myself. I feel like what I make for myself is time being wasted. Sometimes I feel like even drawing my ocs is also a waste of time. It doesn't spark joy because looking at most of my ocs or sonas makes me sad. So then I make new ones and hope those will make me happy only to get nervous that people will get upset at my inconsistency and because I make too many ocs (it's happened before).

I'm also tired of feeling like my (personal) art's only desirable when it's tickle art. It makes me want to leave the tk community so bad... but I always come back. I told myself I wouldn't leave again this time cuz I like having a space to talk about tk stuff... But I'm feeling sore about the whole thing again.

I wish my art was good enough for me to be an FFXIV artist. But being devoid of passion for art for the past couple of months and wanting validation for my art from the tk community who's way more supportive is making it super hard to just... Draw normal, non-tk stuff.

Most of the time I like my art and my style. But I want to be better... And idk why I hate the thought of getting better and wasting it on tickle art. So I'm just stuck doing the same shit.

I want to sell at conventions. I want to be part of a fandom's community. I want my art to be liked outside of tickle art...

I know I went through 60 different topics in this read more and I'm so sorry if you read all of it, but I just feel so trapped... I'm not even sure if it's seasonal depression anymore cuz these problems keep popping up too often.

[absurdly-overpowered-astronaut]

you know something that has bothered me about persona 5 ever since I played it is how they don’t address Yusuke’s attitude towards art.

He idealises the artistic process to the point its clearly self destructive (ie doesn’t eat , doesn’t have any money ect) and more concerning the idea of the true artist. The artist who is divorced from all worldly needs and pleasures the artists who has cut themselves off completely from society all in the name of their unbending artistic vision.

The best example I can think of off the top of my head is when he comes over to Ren’s house he gets them to watch art documentaries with him and if I’m remembering correctly the guy in the documentary left his family and completely cut himself off from society for the sake of his craft and yusuke considers this aspirational.

The problem is this attitude isn’t actually all that helpful. Any work done while depriving yourself is never the best work you could have made whether that be of sleep , food , social interaction , joy ect and art devoiced from society lacks meaning the best art isn’t completely removed from the human experience it reflects and comments it on it

but more so then this mindset being destructive and a tired idea I have distain for it feels like such a clear extension of Madarame’s abuse. We see Madarame also holds this mindset so Yusuke must have gotten it from him and it seems to disproportionately benefit Madarame and reminds me of abusive behaviour.

if yusuke doesn’t value and understand money or the worldly pleasures it can afford him then he won’t be bothered by Madarame receiving all the money from his works and it makes him more dependent on Madarame / the school he goes to because he can’t for example take the train , afford food or housing and it somewhat limits him socially making it harder to go out with friends.

“Social abuse is behaviour that is aimed at cutting you off from other relationships. This can be your family, friends, your workplace or a community you belong to.

The abusive person may:

-try to stop you from seeing other people or going to social activities

-try to stop you from going out

-make it difficult for you to use your car, other forms of transport or mobility aids” (in this case train)

“Types of financial and economic abuse

The abusive person may:

-take full control of all the finances, spending and decisions about money so that you are financially dependent on them”

if yusuke thinks that the only compensation a “true artist” needs is the artistic fulfilment of completing a work then he won’t be bothered by Madarame taking the credit

if yusuke thinks he needs to cut himself off from the world and others then he will be less likely to realise that what madarame is doing is wrong but also that he is completely dependent on madarame.

“Abusive partners will often try to isolate their victim, i.e. limit their access to those close to them in order to weaken them psychologically. The victim ends up cut off from the relationships that fuel their inner strength, provide validation and support, and could help them to see their situation more clearly.”

(I’m using an example from an article about abuse in romantic relationships but the point still applies)

if yusuke is single mindedly focused on the creation of art that benefits Madarame more because the more art the more compensation he receives

“An abuser may deliberately deprive the victim of sleep, with the aim of making them more vulnerable. The abuser may startle her awake just as she's about to fall asleep, refuse to let her sleep to settle an argument (often deliberately started at bedtime), or wake her up incessantly during the night” “The victim then loses a lot of stamina and finds themselves greatly weakened, both psychologically and physically.”

the idea that only other creative souls will understand your work creates a us vs them conflict and allows the abuser to easily reflect with “they just don’t understand”

It introduces this dynamic that wanting anything that doesn’t contribute to the art is bad and makes you a worse artist a worse person. Its assigning morality and success to the behaviour that madarame wants to incentivise and disincentivise he wants yusuke to make more art but he doesn’t want to yusuke to become disconnect or independent so the sentiment that to be a true artist you must let go of worldly possessions once again loops back round to reinforcing abuse

even though he is out of the abusive environment he still hasn’t unlearned/been confronted on this mind set.

[threepoint14art]

I'm gonna word vomit about the nightmares because GOD I'm listening to great escape on loop and i feel like I'm going insane so yeah if you wanna read that im gonna put it under the cut because its probably gonna be LONG TLDR: I love them and they make my head hurt

We know the nightmares are not good people, like at all. The very first instance we see them is in the episode literally titled "BONNIES NIGHTMARE" and yeah, they sure are his nightmare.

They harass him for money as a "tradition", Bonnie doesn't have any, they try and take his guitar, until there they’re pretty standard random assholes, then meg says "they know where you live" when Bon tries to intervene and refers to them as a complete group, "the *nightmares* know where you live" and then the stakes become weirder. Because aside from just very visibly being horrible people, they already have a reputation of being actually dangerous besides just mugging, they know where people live. You can argue they know where Meg, Fox and Spring live based on past history with all of them, and they could know where Bonnie lives based on how they harass him and all of that; but for them to know where Bon lives? someone who they appear to have literally no biases against and who is, up to that point, just completely unrelated to any of what's happening? It’s weird

You could say it's because he's friends with Meg, but I sort of doubt Bon would bring anyone over with how his dad is, so we are back at "why the actual hell would they know that" If they are mindless thugs it’s a bit weird that they would keep track of specifics like that. And I like to think that that’s the point. They make it a point to know sensitive information about people so that they are less inclined to go against them, just like Meg was. 

Then Fox appears and they seem really put off by it. The series tries really hard to sell that Fox is angry, violent and just a hot head. Which I don't really agree with? as in rewatches I've found myself going "yeah that's a valid reason to be angry" but whatever, going off the series alone and what they intend with each character, Fox is someone who is sort of dangerous, guy who gets into fights and all of that, they seem sort of familiar with each other too. "this is low even for you guys" and then Deuz calling Fox by his name. 

So they are 1) known 2)violent 3) actively make a show out of it. They scare people by knowing their private information yet they don’t seem to do anything with it at all, they could harass Bonnie closer to his house and not at the literal school entrance full of people but they don’t. They could drag him out to somewhere more hidden to not get bothered, but they don't, it's almost as if they want people to see. It's performative, speaking loud and laughing louder, in direct contrast to Bonnie's quiet voice who tries to leave in the least showy way possible. 

We don't see them go to school, hell we don't even see them in uniform until after camp, so I used to think they were older and that  the entire thing with the nightmares vs spring was sort of "the adult drama" outside of school and its teenagers. Their entire group just felt heavier than the rest of the kids, probably fueled by being antagonists.

The next time we see them it's with the aforementioned Spring, they are graffiting a wall and Spring tells them to not do it and to go do it in the "legal area" the artistic zone made for that. 

This is really interesting to me, mostly because even though spring grew up in a similar situation to them, he carries completely different moral values. It even seems as if he's overcompensating. Spring is a hard worker, he has jobs upon jobs and tries to live honestly, and to see other people get by in the direct opposite way he does, he wants to be as separated as possible, have nothing in common because he is a “good” person and they are “bad” people. 

There is no way that his entire area isn't drowning in graffiti already, because even sub-urban areas have graffiti, both actual art and the standard weird drawings of dicks or random curse words. And while the latter are not exactly great to see, they are also inherently thoughtless. People walk around and go "yeah this would be funny" and do it without thinking twice.

With the way that Onnie and Onyx (I call oxy that) talk about it, what they were about to do wasn't thoughtless, they were literally looking for a nice wall. it seemed like they just wanted to do actual artistic graffiti which is a pastime that seems inherently way less morally evil than just harassing random kids at school. They aren't actively looking for Spring either, they are just there. Spring picks the fight, the police come

They run away from the police, there's a ruckus with the police after (as said by Fox). They didn't actually vandalize anything, hell they didn't even have any paint on them throughout that entire exchange. But they still run? They could have done something before going over there, but in that case it'd be strange that they would be so calm and giddy about it knowing full well someone could come, they don't seem to be carrying anything at all either, robbing school kids may be possible with only your fists but they were just around streets without any knife or anything at night, so i doubt they could mug someone if they tried. 

So why would they run? I think it’s because they are all mostly just show, and that their lives shaped them to be that way. The police are scary not on the basis of "they can imprison me for this wrong thing I did" but on the basis of "the police hates people like us." The police hates the poor, the police hates queer people, it hates anyone who fails to fit in the box of what"an upstanding citizen" should look like. Of course they leave with their theatrics still there, telling Spring to "be grateful they saved you!!!" trying to save face. But it's clear they didn't actually do something to warrant fleeing, and this is supported by Spring also hiding. 

The next episode, "the birth of evil" is where everything crumbles and by crumbles i mean comes together. Spring, Fox and Bonnie go to a talent show and they meet the nightmares there, once again the whole act starts again. An obnoxious laugh, a confident pose, an ensemble of people behind you to be able to have your back. Deuz calls them dogs and the other 2 bark, its a performance. Deuz adresses the group, Onyx talks to Spring, Onnie talks to Bonnie.  

They don’t seem to acknowledge Bonnie in specific as anything important, they don’t blink and demand he gives them the money he still “owes”, they don’t tell him he’s lucky that he’s not alone. They pick a fight with the conglomerate and that's it. 

The way Spring and Fox carry themselves in the exact same situation seems just fundamentally different. They insult back of course, but they are way less vitriolic with it, and they don't accompany it with an air of grandiose superiority or an encore of background laughs or barks to drive their point home. They seem honest with their comeback, they have fun with it. Onyx and Onnie GROWL. 

Deux stands in front of them, he has been doing that this entire time, and the other two behind him growl, genuinely upset or threatened by a comeback that let's be honest. Was not even that good. "You smell that? envy?" and "the rats came out to eat, shame we didn't bring cheese"

But it not being good is sort of the point, it feels less practiced, less rehearsed and less of an act, a stupid comeback that reads more like a 3rd grader fight than anything, compared to the more antagonistic "look at the stray dogs. though this was a talent show not a barking one." "give me paw, have you learned to play dead yet?" Those are way stronger, and yet it seems like they just lose the exchange, immediately get defensive and growl, and look genuinely upset. 

Funny thing is that their insults apply to them more than they apply to those three. Both Onnie and Onyx have been shown constantly barking and growling, to call someone a stray dog implies some level of poorness or a lack of belonging. They put down what may seem wrong with them, and apply it to other people to get a leg up. 

Maggie tells them to drop it, they go and perform what they came here to perform. Deuz says "dont waste your energy, let's prove what real talent is" which can certainly just be read as another insult, as a way to call them talentless, but i chose to interpret it as masking a sore spot. We HAVE talent, even if people say we don't.

And this is the main attraction. Great escape. My love. 

With all we know about them, you would imagine their music would follow through with the image they've been constantly pushing. Rough around the edges, loud, obnoxious, full of self adulation. But it's just... Not that.

Song starts, and it seems like they will follow through. It's strong, it's loud, it's overwhelming and yet awestrucking, the guitar is at the forefront and is going crazy. And then it suddenly becomes soft, not weak or pacifying by any means, but soft nonetheless. 

Deuz’s voice is calm, he’s not screaming and he’s not making himself louder than necessary, the mic is there and it WILL pick what he says up. So he’s just singing, he’s not struggling to be heard. The very first line is “if i wasn’t the one who i thought I was, could you show with conviction who you really are?” It’s weirdly wordy and self introspective for someone who is supposedly just evil, who has presented himself as an unmovable wall, as someone strong, foul mouthed and completely used and comfortable with his way of life. As someone who poses a real danger.

If I wasn't who I thought I was, if I wasn't strong and if I wasn't at the forefront, could you really show who you are? If he wasn’t like this, if he seemed soft or weak, could his group live in peace? Could they be who they want to be? It’s not like they are 100% free to be who they are right now. They too, keep an appearance of being unbothered, strong, but at least they get to live, they get to present themselves how they want and not be scared of someone hurting them because of it, because they ARE the harm, and they have a leader. He’s the pillar, and he has to be who he THINKS he is. He has to be there.

“Will you be able to not fall today without your costume?  your heart breaks just like a fragile glass” The idea of costumes, of keeping an appearance, making “the nightmares” a single intimidating entity that no one can mess with, could they live without it? Chances are not, life is cruel and they seem to know that. It’s a dog eat dog world, and they act as if they are on the top of that food chain.

The song is for all of them, it’s ADDRESSED to them, Deuz uses first person and second person, me and you against whatever is put in our way. And that is what makes the song so special to me, in a show were we see the protagonists in the process of becoming friends the nightmares have been together since forever. And this song is for them, to find hope in hopelessness and to simply state how important all of them are to each other. “and in the distance I can hear that your voice started to call me”.

And we see what has led them down this way of thinking. Not a justification, but an explanation.

We start with Deuz, whose first memory appears to be literally working. Working to sustain himself, working to be able to live better, “I know that I will wake up.” I know that I can get out of here somehow, people are horrible to a literal child trying to live, we see how it lasted a long while too. From the candy selling to when his hands are curled into a fist we can see that he visibly grew up, he kept living in those conditions and he never actually experienced sympathy for it, people laughed, people insulted him, people seemed to be grossed out by the mere idea of a kid who was BORN into poverty, because how dare he try and survive? “I fell into an dark abysm without an end”  

With this it would make sense for him to become cynical, to assume it’s him against the world forever, and that people are inherently evil. But the lyrics are hopeful. “I escaped swiftly and I saved my life, I felt as if i were finally breathing again. Today let’s break the walls at once” Life is cruel, people are cruel, but it gives him a frame of reference of what type of people stay at the top of the chain, to be mean, to be violent, not out of enjoyment but necessity, camouflage to survive and breathe again, make sure people don’t mess with him again. The image of a little kid with scratches throughout all his body looking angrily at the camera

“In a place of the world where light goes away and doesn’t want to come back. Could you be sure that you’ll find it?” He could stay alone, he could dish out the same disdain and disgust that people showed him when he was at his lowest, but despite it all he still has empathy, and despite everything he wants to help, “evil” was born through how he lived, but his true nature is still there. And when he sees someone his age at his lowest, he doesn’t hesitate to help. He doesn’t fall in the idea of “everyone should have it as bad as me, i had it worse, it’s not my problem.” He extends the kindness that he never had, and he helps. Could you really find light when everything seems dark? find hope in what seems hopeless?see a A scared little kid being beat in a closed alleyway, amongst all the trash. Could you be fine with it? Have any hope in such a situation?

“if everything breaks slowly and with pain. Could you pick up the pieces that fall?”  He stops it, he becomes the light that went away, a sense of hope and belonging, he offers a hand that was never offered to him. Onnies expression in this always gets me, he looked scared when he was alone, but once someone stands up for him he doesn’t look glad or happy. He seems shocked, in complete disbelief. Both Onyx and Maggie seem to be relieved when they are saved, but Onnie is just shocked. Why would someone just intervene or care? this was not a one time thing, he already had the bruises before any hit ever connected, he fled into a dead end and expected it to end like that. And it didn’t. Everything was already broken, why would someone pick up the pieces? 

“In the distance I can hear the quake of the world and its end. Today you’ll start from zero. I have to say see you later” I’ve seen some people be confused by this part or even laugh at it. Deuz just appears, punches onyx, and they become friends. But the very first shot is Onyx sitting slumped on the ground as if he had been beat up and was barely conscious. But he wasn’t, he had no injuries at all, the lyric talks about the end of the world, he had given up. We don’t know the circumstances of this, but given how clean his clothes are and how he lacks any injuries, it’s my personal headcanon that he got kicked out. A kid alone in the streets kicked out, he should give up, because what else could he do? how else could he live? A wake up call in the form of a fist, this place is dangerous and not what you are used to. But today you’ll start from zero, you just have to say goodbye to what you had. 

The chorus changes, it’s no longer a dark abyss, but a dark path. In the name of not being at the very bottom he has become something he isn’t, all of them have, their lives shaped them to be rougher, they are like the people who hurt them in the past. This is especially true to Onnie becoming a bully. And the path seems endless, because dropping the fake bravado doesn’t seem like a possibility. The world is cruel to those it perceives as weak, so they can’t show themselves to be. That's why we are shown the three of them looking angry, unbothered, the strength their life demanded but at the very least as a group; making themselves bigger, with Deuz at the forefront. 

And we cut to Maggie (who I use he/him for), screaming and trying to get away from someone who is clearly bigger, an adult. From the song “closer” at the camp arc, we can see how that person was enjoying causing distress, a crooked and mocking smile on their face “there will be people who think this is pure hypocrisy” To go from being the kid suffering at the hands of someone stronger, to the one causing said pain onto another kid, all to not be weak and not be a target again. 

The group doesn’t only defend Maggie, fight back against someone bigger than all of them. But Deuz goes out of his way to try and cheer him up, and gives him a sweet to calm down.  “incapable of forgetting the beast that’s hungry yet again” this world, it’s difficulties that feel like sharp teeth mauling at people who have not done any sin but to exist yet, people feed on others being miserable, on feeding on those who seem weaker and their suffering, like beasts. You can’t ignore it, you have to fight back, bare your own teeth.

“Beyond the storm my hand is waiting for you. That sword pierced depression with all it’s strength” After the suffering, after the hardships and the pain, my hand will be there waiting for yours. Together we are stronger, and together we can be happy despite what everyone else can say. “Before just falling like that…” before giving up, before falling, we have each other.

And it’s the chorus again, I fell in a dark abyss, but now what saved his life is not making himself scarier, it’s not the realization of what act he should put on, it’s not his anger freeing him. It’s having his group. And once they break the walls, once they break through their self imposed image, through “the wall” , they can live without fear or grudges. 

Next we see them is at camp, and it seems as if Deuz already started to try to break through said wall, they are actually going to school now, they are at a camp. And when Onyx and Onnie start with the theatrics, when they try to immediately establish themselves as stronger and crueler. He reminds them that they are not on the streets. They aren’t in that horrible environment they’ve always lived in, not everyone is bound to be outright hostile, and they try. 

Later on Deuz says “If being at this camp and learning to work in a team makes my boys finally get accepted by society. Then I’ll do it.” and after that “I’ll show them that we can all change for the better.” They all became hostile because of where they grew up, but if there’s a chance to not be like that, to live in peace, then he’ll take it. He wants the best for them.

And that’s not to say Deuz has always been the pillar of morality. He participated in Bonnies harassment as much as all of them, but their thing is to change, to let go of that gut reaction of cruelty to avoid being hurt. And Deuz also changes with time. At the start, anyone who participated in the event, who went to the docks which is their territory, he would have been annoyed, he would have called them talentless, insult them and their craft and claim he and his crew were better before completely disregarding them as a whole. He would have been defensive about the only place where he can actually showcase his thoughts and feelings. But no! Later on he has respect for Fred, calls him “the king of the docks” and tries to be friendly. Of course after that Freddy is completely confused and he gets pissed, but I think it’s because he tried, he attempted to be friendly and swallow his pride and his defensiveness about the one thing they all have, and he got (in his head) made fun of. It made his instinct of “be the one on the top of the interaction always” kick in, because they WERE on the streets at that time and it’s suddenly the same it always has been. 

Right after that pup kills him on a single punch and that didn’t happen ^^.  no waaaay he would go down so easy to a person like pup whose most athletic skill is gymnastics. Deuz has shown he's had to fight and fight dirty/lawlessly to survive since he was little. it just doesn't make sense and it’s not real TOT Pup is built like a twig

“pia what about onnies song” also didn't happen ^^. After this point the series tries to soften Onnie to be less of a willing participant of the group’s actions, and I just really do not like it. Let him have blue hair and pronouns AND evil in his heart. 

I think that’s all for all, i need to be tazed. I know i kept it very neutral till now but guys please tell me you see why i ship them all so hard. God. I need to kill them all

i hate them you need to be put down <3 like the dogs u like (the nightmares) - Loops

[mariequitecontrary]

2024 TF Reverse Mini Bang Memories Part 1

With the @tf-bigbang discord server closing today, I thought I'd share just a few of my favorite memories during my first community fandom event :)

Not to be dramatic, but this event changed the trajectory of my part in the transformers community for the better. It felt like I was at a 4 month long summer camp! I had so much fun talking to everyone and making so many precious, precious friends that I truly hope to stay in touch with.

So buckle in and grab some boba or your preferred drink of choice, because this is going to be long and sentimental.

A Welcoming Start

I joined at the beginning of April, due to someone reposting the Big Bang's twitter post about how writers were still welcome to join. I thought, "Only 5k word requirement over the course of a few months? Yeah sure. I can do that." Little did I know I'd actually committed to writing a fic almost 5 times that length

The vibes in the discord server started out with a bang (heh). Everyone was immediately kind and welcoming to one another. It was an immediate safe space to be excited, let loose and show our freak XD I loved how ferally affectionate we were with bringing new friends into the fold.

A sketch by @nepetacataria-art perfectly shows this I think XD

The Support and Love Shared

The sheer amount of love, comradery, and support shared with one another was astounding. Almost 200 writers and artists shared tips and tricks and offered advice and encouragement to each other! It was unreal and I learned so much. It truly encouraged me to improve in my craft and even inspired me to want to learn how to draw again!

Oh, and the RECS everyone shared!!! Everyone shared so many fics and art pieces that I am now obsessed with! I have been blessed with a LOT of quality, amazing content that I never would have seen otherwise! My tbr list grew from large to neverending haha <3

Teasing the Artists Before Match Ups

I'm ngl, I had WAY too much fun once the sketches were released to the writers and the secret-authors-corner channel was made. We all OBSESSED over all of the art and fangirled over each one! But we also talked, and talked, and talked. And dropping out of context messages into the public channels for the artists to see was too much fun!

Talking Transformers

IT WAS THE BEST THING EVEERRRRRR!!!!! WOWOWOWOWOW! I loved raving about characters and lore, both canon and fanon! Even when I wasn't a part of the conversation, just lurking and reading what people talked about whether it was AUs, comics, shows, character breakdowns, brainstorming ideas...it was all so cool and so fun. Everyone is so creative and thinking about the sheer amount of fun we all had makes me tear up.

Like, SO MANY plot bunnies were made with everyone! Myself included! Sometimes people would just say a random ass thing and then five others would hop on, riffing against each other and developing that little idea into something concrete and so so JUICY.

Two out of many MANY conversations that I personally loved were the video games x transformers ideas and talking tentacles and transformers in the nsfw channel XD

Writers Panicking, As We Do

It was all in fun, but it was very entertaining and validating to be in a space where we can all stress about our writing, our fics, and approaching deadlines.

The mods clearly enjoyed adding endless fuel to the fire and (lovingly) watched us all scream and run around in a fiery chaotic panic over every little thing.

Streaming

I didn't get to join many, but it was always so cool watching artists draw! I also had a lot of fun streaming Hades 2 with a few friends with it was first released :)

Team 0 - A King Julien Starscream Fic

It all started when Writer's Choice Period began...and the example inspired many of us writers to obsess over this...I'll let the screenshots tell you XD

A King Julien Starscream fic just WORKS and you can't tell me otherwise! @mendely's sketch REALLY sold it to me as a thing that's GOTTA happen.

Madagascar AU FTW

AND THEN THE MODS MADE IT A THING THING

@useless19's king julienscream puppet owns my soul and their little vid is possibly the finest piece of silent cinema I've ever watched in my entire life. I was ENRAPTURED.

@sxpaiscia's art KILLS ME. PUTS MY HEART IN A CHOKEHOLD. Julienscream lives in my head rent free and 50% of it is imagined with their art in mind.

The sad end to the story is...the Team 0's fic wasn't completed within the time requirements to be posted with the rest of the Mini Bang's fics :( Do we still plan on continuing and finishing it? HELL YEAH WE ARE!

To Be Continued...

Did you know that there is a limit to the amount of images you can share in one post? SMH.

Link to Part 2!

[drchucktingle]

hello I hope this isn't annoying but I was thinking about your post about how harriet porber was written out of love for trans people instead of spite for transphobes and that is just... very important to me. I would have not batted an eye at you saying that the books were written out of spite, like, that is generally how people talk about stuff like this, and I am very used to it, and it's not bad exactly, but like, it's kind of soul-numbing. I firmly believe in the importance of centring love in things like this. it's one thing to know that people hate the people that hate the kind of person you are, but it's easy to slip underneath that into despair and loneliness and everything. it doesn't do much to really make me feel safe or good about anything. it's a lot more impactful to know that there are people that love the kind of person you are. and I have a tendency to think very rigidly, and so I was having a hard time thinking about myself in that way. and seeing someone say that they made art out of love instead of spite was very comforting. not sure where I am going with this, sorry.

thank you bud. i would like to go on record to say it is OK to make art out of spite and rage and envy and all of these other motivators they are all valid and i am not here to tell others their artistic motivations and their fuel is not important. we ALL have our own trot as we create on this timeline that is okay.

HOWEVER it is my advise and personal way to say that I CREATE WITH FUEL OF LOVE and i highly recommend this to others it is my number one advise when asked. love is most powerful force across any timeline. in all layers of reality it is only constant and i believe there is something to this. as artists and creators and SENTIENT BEINGS we exist in opposition to the endless cosmic void. just by taking a single breath we are crying out I AM HERE I EXIST IN DEFIANCE OF NOTHINGNESS.

creation and love are INTERWOVEN in such a powerful way that you might as well say they are the same thing. personally i BELIEVE they are the same thing and once you realize this it is hard to draw on any other artistic fuel.

YOU have the power of the dang big bang and infinite churning suns across infinite timelines sitting RIGHT THERE FOR YOU TO MOLD AND BEND AND USE AND CREATE so reach out and take it. paint a picture or write a poem thats ten thousand words or one word or no words at all. create a walk. create a sandwich for your dang kids before they trot off to school. create a sidewalk with one less piece of trash on it.

if you do this with love it will resonate in ways you cannot imagine

[libras-interactives]

Usually, I'm not one to comment or ask stuff unless it's a reply but god UTDM (and Lackadaisy) has a grip on me rn :'D

So I have two questions, and if they've been already answered feel free to ignore them!

1. It's stated somewhere in the fic that Flynn uses a cane. So does he have it simply for cosmetic reasons or does he actually need it for walking?

2. Do you think that Cora and Rocky would get along (when not taking the whole 'one does illegal stuff while the other is trying to stop illegal stuff from happening' thing into account)? I kinda thought they would because they are similar personality wise (or at least somewhat lol). Both look up to a co-worker/their boss, crave some sort of validation and are rather hyper.

Also, I just wanted to say I love this fic sm <3

This was the first time I tried out an interactive one, and I'm glad I did :] The added characters are lovely (love love the boys wanna give them a hug or smth), and this fic helped me make four characters! I'm hoping to share them along with art in the near future, but don't get your hopes up, my motivation is a creature that I cannot seem to tame lmao

Anyway, sorry if all of this is rambly, I'm not the best at wording my thoughts in a coherent way :']

Hiiii welcome to my fixation, hope it's fueling your's LOL. Pls tag me if you end up drawing them, I love seeing people's OCs that come from this! And thank you for the kind words 🥺😭

1) People think it's just cosmetic, he goes great lengths to make sure no one sees him using it as a mobility aid. I don't think anyone - sans maybe his brother, the MC a few times, and Cerberus once or twice - has seen him use his proper medical cane. His regular snake-head cane is (per @acesandocs cool ass design) is cool and impressive for showing off but doesn't help when he's hurting.

2) In spite of their similarities, Cora would be aghast at the idea of her and Rocky getting along ... He's a criminal! And drifter! And has a suspicious face!

Setting aside their actual jobs, if they were on the same "team" - They'd both be annoying each other, because Cora leans more orderly and logical, and Rocky is more sensitive and artistic. But to everyone on the outside, they both have very similar chaotic energy and thought processes haha. She also came from a much nicer upbringing and has a more rigid way of thinking, so she probably wouldn't emphatize well with Rocky's "quirks". They both share that inclination to like or dislike someone right away, and stick with that initial opinion.

[roo-bastmoon]

In Defense of Our Alliance

My dear friends, there's trouble on the timeline today and it hurts my heart. I'd like to make a case for peace, if I may...

Every group of friends and all communities need every so often to hash out differences in points of view, personalities, and policies--but I suspect there's a bit more to it than that, this time.

We are beset on all sides with enemies we cannot fight.

Billboard keeps deleting sales without explanation, deaf to our requests or complaints. They absolutely have a double standard for the artists who pay radio to play. We cannot be sure any of our new buying methods will work, and in this economy, nobody has money to burn without a care.

YouTube keeps deleting views, again without explanation, despite folks streaming under premium accounts and following best practices. Watching those counts go down by the hundreds of thousands every hour is maddening, especially when it doesn't happen to artists who pay for ads.

Spotify froze and split title tracks. Hanteo deleted sales data the second records broke. The company went completely silent--neither celebrating Jimin's Hot100 #1 nor publicly acknowledging his being unfairly pushed down the chart--again, without explanation or recourse. Even some members were silent about his achievement.

Meanwhile, the LA Times is writing love letters to other groups trying to use our group for validation, which is just baffling.

This is to say nothing of the cult, the haters, the shooters from other fandoms, dragging our friends and our members through the mud, nonstop, all day every day, with a particular viciousness I'd normally associate only with actual diagnosed psychopaths.

And we knew there would be challenges, maybe even a contrived scandal or two, around Jimin's release. But I don't think anyone could predict this level of a shit show.

Everyone is exhausted; everyone is on edge.

What was supposed to be a fun and safe space has become a battleground.

And most of us are so ready to defend Jimin and the other members, yet we have zero hope of a fair fight.

It is no surprise to me that, with all that fatigue and pent-up anger, we are starting to fight amongst each other.

I must acknowledge that there are a fair few things we need to hash out as a fandom--the ability to call a spade a spade and not be labeled an anti; the ability to block or take time away and not be called a coward; the ability to criticize but not give in to hate or cult-like narratives; the ability to speak our minds without spewing negativity. There's a lot that needs to be addressed, and it's for heads clearer and smarter than me to untangle it all.

But I will say this:

Jimin has only us. That much is very clear.

So I put it to you now:

We NEED our archivists, who help capture and catalogue the important milestones and the little moments that illustrate why our fandom believes what it does.

We NEED our tutors, who help us make the most of our streams and purchases and votes so we are not wasting time and money and effort.

We NEED our cheerleaders, who help reset our attitudes into more positive, gentler, kinder, more honorable kinds of fans.

And we NEED our discourse blogs, the ones who can entertain multiple points of view without bashing or adopting any particular stance.

Most of all, right now, we need to unite. Because Jimin has very few other folks in his corner. Hobi goes in today. And while his other members love him, I strongly suspect he will feel the absence of Hobi's unfailing support, his clear demonstration of affection, and his wise counsel.

Now more than ever, we must come together. And to do that, we each much decide:

Why are we here?

If you're here to experience pleasure over a ship or a rush of adrenaline over drama and tea, if you just want to look at pretty pics and fics and not really get involved--okay. You are a casual fan. Nothing wrong with that. All I ask is that you do no harm while in this space. Don't fuel the flames of any feud, please.

But if you're here for Jimin, for BTS, for Jikook... then the goal has to be to support Jimin and BTS and Jikook first and foremost, yes? Even though it would feel great to pop off on someone you don't like or agree with (and I'm in Super Menopause thanks to medication so I absolutely sympathize with folks who do pop off--god knows, I have), please try to ask yourself:

Does it serve our common purpose?

Does it help?

Is it kind?

Would Jimin and Jikook feel honored by it?

Would BTS be proud of us?

And if the answer is no, then: forgive yourself for being human. We are none of us perfect.

But maybe take some time away to reset and recharge.

Real life is stressful; fandom life is stressful. Try to get some deep sleep. Let yourself enjoy a nutritious, hearty meal. Watch a comedy show that makes you belly laugh. Look at something so beautiful it makes you tear up. Listen to uplifting music. Pet an animal. Take a walk. Enjoy a luxurious bubble bath. However you restore yourself to your BEST self, you deserve that.

And then? Bring your best self back to this fandom. Because otherwise, we abandon it to the loudest assholes out there.

In the end, I believe we all want to support our boys and to make the best judgements on how to be a good fan. We may disagree on how to do that. But that's no reason to insult our allies or harshly judge the way they conduct themselves.

Shame is not a teaching tool.

Let's lead by example.

I'm a small blog. I'm nobody important. If you've read this far, I'm already surprised. But if you're still with me--please take this much to heart: I sincerely want us to get back to being the loving, intelligent, hard-working, focused fandom we've always been.

We are just regular people. We are going to have bad takes, and bad days, and bad attitudes. But let's give each other a little grace.

And if someone truly has bad intentions, and wants to ruin things, then let us calmly, quietly walk away from them. No need to give our precious time and attention to anything toxic. Toxic people feed off it and only get stronger, anyway.

Our time and energy is best spent on what brought us all here in the first place: BTS.

These are my thoughts, and I mean to say them sincerely and gently.

If this post rubbed you the wrong way, my DMs are open and I'm willing to listen to your thoughts. (Because DMs are always the best place to question someone or discuss something sensitive, I think.) But it's very unlikely that you'll change my mind about the need for us to work together and treat each other compassionately, so, you might wish to just quietly block and be on your way instead.

In any case, I just wanna say... I see you guys, out there. I see you trying hard. I see you contemplating the best way to make use of your time and resources. I see your bubbly enthusiasm and your devastating frustration. I see you, and I think each of you are very human, in the best sense of the word. Despite all the heart aches and hardships, I'm still proud to count myself among you.

It's not much, but I'm sending you guys my love and support. <3

It's gonna be okay. We'll get through this.

I'll show you.

[saltminerising]

ngl sometimes making accents just makes me so sad. i want to do it. but it's hard for me to separate my art from my person, and therefore it's hard not to feel personally rejected when people don't like my art.

and that's a me problem, not an accent problem, but the community around accents sometimes fuels it. like people doing the whole "oh no my accent flopped it only sold 3 runs" thing when I've been doing this since 2016 and I've never hit that many runs. longer than many artists have been on site.

which is not to say my art is entitled to people's attention or praise, because it isn't. I just struggle to figure out what I'm doing wrong. Am I too inconsistent? Does my art style just translate poorly to accents?

i dont know. i try not to let it make me bitter, because i want to do this because i like doing it, and not for external validation. but it's hard not to feel like a bad person for being jealous when others succeed in the same vein where I failed

[shockersalvage]

Salvage Showcase - Eichiro Saiyama

...And so I missed the Killer Killer anniversary like, well, a lot! My bad, but trying to find who to do next was pretty difficult. I didn't want to do a salty or disappointed Showcase like the last two, so was trying to focus on who I could write about that I liked.

So on that end I decided to do a Showcase on one of Killer Killer's better serial killers of the week (having a backstory will do that to you) - its Eichiro Saiyama!!!

Eichiro was a lonely and rather unpopular kid in his youth. The only happy moment he could gather was when one girl complimented his art and said he should be a mangaka.

And so he did!! That moment inspired him to be a manga artist that worked under Comic Ponpon...except the issue of people praising him persisted. While he's surviving the Tragedy enough to continue his work, it should be noted that his work was considered just...okay. Editors or readers, no one really cared for it.

Cue one day, Takumi Hijirihara shows up in a box, going over his work and about one he liked was Eichiro's documentary manga about the Tragedy. It had gotten popular with Takumi for its hyperrealistic graphic displays of death, but there was just one issue.

See, they were a bit too realistic.

Yeah, Eichiro is a serial killer that murders his victims to use as references in his manga. To be specific, he's a copycat killer that murders his victims in relation to past cases, such as stringing up people to look like Chihiro's corpse.

Takumi deduces his motives were in a vain attempt to gain some praise, and criticizes him for using murder to seek out approval from others, believing attempts like that won't ever sell well. Takumi ranks Eichiro's murder as being 20 points for his misdeeds, and notes that Eiichiro's manga, while he does like it, won't ever be a bestseller since it's just too ordinary (to the point he marks Eichiro's manga as just being 55 points, even though Takumi likes it)

Upon hearing this, Eichiro (who had been progressively losing his mind) snaps and attacks Takumi, trying to kill him with his Wolverine-eqsue pens. But, Takumi get's the leg up and kill Eichiro similarly to how Mukuro Ikusaba died.

Eichiro is a man that seeks out praise above all else since he sorely lacked that in life. Self-describing himself as dull, he believes his only redeeming quality is his artistic skills since it net him one praise he got in life. He is very sensitive to people dismissing him and his hard work.

Eventually, his need for approval escalated until he became a serial killer, killing others to use as reference for his work out of some desire to gain what he wanted the most.

Rundown

In Killer Killer's theme of Passion vs Shallowness, Eichiro represents Shallowness in the form of attention and represents the dangers of being obsessed with validation from others. He wants people to notice him, and gives him the praise he feels he deserves. It's what fuels him to become a mangaka and drives him to the point that became a copycat killer to try to get what he wanted.

But its all at a detriment to himself. He focused so hard on his artistic skills he neglected his personal life, be it making friends or enjoying life that he made his own self-esteem issues worse. And because what he chased after was something so brief, and in a career so demanding, it had become a cycle of toxic disappointment and desperation. It's basically a self-fulfilling downward spiral in a way.

Another aspect of Eichiro that's telling to his own 'dullness' is the form of manga he made, a documentary, and even his own killing: copycat murders. He's essentially recapping events that most people in the world at the time would be privy about, and committing the cardinal sin for those in the artistic world - plagiarism. No one really cares for his work because he's essentially just regurgitating common knowledge for the public. If he had made something more original, he'd probably would get better success, but given how much he shut himself away to 'hone his talent' he probably doesn't have the life skills or proper imagination for it (and never will thanks to Takumi).

Finally, he's killed in similar way to Mukuro's Spears of Gungnir, though instead of spears its his own pens that kill him. in Danganronpa, ironic murders are all the rage, so you can think of it as symbolizing his own talent - his own crutch and downfall in life - being the one to lead him astray and betray him.

Personal Thoughts

I really like Eichiro, because he's one of the few characters in Killer Killer to be fully fleshed out. In backstory, in motivations, in personality - he's brimming with it in one chapter, when most of the main cast lack it in all 14. (Probably since the writer for KK is speaking from their own feelings in the industry, but that's just me). He's one of the few gems that I can say are good about Killer Killer and wish the other killers replicated. Especially Ted, who debuted in chapter 3.

I also like Eichiro in how he fleshed out an established lore item in DR2, that being the Tragedy manga found in endgame. He's heavily implied to be the author of that, and I always appreciate it when the DR series tries to build upon past continuity. Same reason why I like Koichi or Another Episode! Or later on concepts like the Mukuro Cult. It's building upon and even expanding the world of DR in a pretty good way. And in a 'flash, but little substance' story that Killer Killer seems to tred, stuff like that needs to be treasured.

Also, even as a killer, I just like he's the sort that should have been promoted more - he feels like a realistic DR villain. He's not drinking blood due to thinking it'll make him younger, he doesn't have parasite monsters that break the world - no, he's just a copycat killer trying to use his murders to increase his fame and get him praise. That's it, and God is it refreshing.

In short: Eiichiro is a breath of fresh air in the Killer Killer entry.

-

With that, another Killer Killer entry done! Hope it's a good read, with the next up being, again, the miscellaneous section of the DR novel side.

[opinated-user]

aww, i'm not the Brittany Gallade Stalker anymore? guys, i lost one of my titles. i don't know who i'm anymore! as long i'm still one Brittany then i guess i'll be fine... but also... i hope i don't have to tell people to not go bringing up my posts to LO. not because i mind she responding, i know she'll anyway if she feels like posturing about something, but because i have said many times before to not interact with her, period, just to see a reaction out of her. i encourage people to not interact with her at all. the whole point of this blog is to spread awareness about her and deplatforming her. i can't do that if people just keep validating her platform by going to interact with her. plus, we all know she'll only use it as more fuel for her own victim narrative so, really, why would you want that? i know it's possible that LO send herself that message, but just in case i want that said: don't interact with LO. don't watch her videos directly, don't try to get a response out of her. moving on... who is going to tell LO that this the very first time she openly talked positively about the art of her wife? (it's rethoric, don't actually do that). by that i mean, she just uses the art of MO, whines in stream about how MO isn't drawing pokemadhouse fast enough, whines about how she has a life that impides her being exploited even more and talks about how many more fanart she'll keep ezqueezing out of her.

oh, and i'm meant to assume that the quality of her art has nothing to do with why you aren't showing your avatar anymore in any of your videos?

those two pieces of art are actually an example of the kind of problem that people do notice with MO. when she's doing things fast enough for you not to whine about it and churning out as many fanart as you want, it looks rushed. it looks unfinished and halfassed because you constantly tell her to make art that way. that can't be healthy for any creative person, just about in general. the fact that she's not even being paid for it speaks badly of you as a partner and a boss. that's not me saying it, it's a fact. one piece of art here and there is just a perk of having an artist as a partner, but you very much has abused that by having MO making entire animatic, multiple visuals for videos, an entire webcomic that you want fully coloured, animatic for that webcomic and all without any paid at all. but when MO can have all the time of the world and there's no wife telling her to forgot anatomy, it looks just so much better. for one, the color choices for the character designs are miles better than whatever is that you're asking her to do for your OCs. there's more flare, life and drama in that one picture of the green character that has ever been in all of pokemadhouse. i don't know why you won't just let her dress saige with something nice for once.

i literally said that MO on her own is a decent enough artist. funny enough, that's the one point that all critical blogs agree on. it's really quite transparent the kind of gasligting you're doing when people can clearly see me saying as much in that message, but still choose to present it otherwise and just ignoring entirely the rest of the point. your constant request for art from her and telling her to halfass it to make it as quickly as possible are my issue. a seasoned artist can do with a quick workflow because they know what they're doing, but MO is not there yet. so all you're really doing by using her like a slot machine for more art and fanart with your weird ideas of "right proportions" is keeping her away from actually learning. for the record too: i call you LO because Lizzy and Courtney, with Lizzy's blessing, wear the last name Orchard better than you. we went over this already.