#aren’t you envious that for you it’s not?
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karma is my boyfriend
karma is a god
karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend
karma’s a relaxing thought
aren’t you envious that for you it’s not?
Karma by Taylor Swift
@andrea-ruano
#taylor swift#karma taylor swift#karma is a cat#karma#midnights#midnights taylor swift#karma is my boyfriend#karma is a god#karma is a relaxing thought#aren’t you envious that for you it’s not?#quote#life quote#revenge era#revenge quotes#karma quotes#what comes around goes around#song lyrics#taylor swift lyrics#taylornation
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when the sorority elects the girl who emotionally traumatized/abused you to a position of power she’s wanted for years without ever having put her in check: 😞
when karma fucks up her time in said positions as well as her hair: ☺️
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Shit has hit the fucking fan on my dads side of the family and I couldn’t be happier to see a certain person I’m related to finally finally FINALLY after twenty one years facing the repercussions of his fucking actions and now he’s basically in financial ruin because his business has failed and I’ve never seen something more deserved or something more delicious and I hope this is just the start of his downfall because he deserves so much pain and so much suffering and all I have to say is that karma is a relaxing thought
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the rest of [tumblr] loves to whine about how much they hate taylor and swifties but anytime she does anything ever she’s always #1 trending <3 stay mad
#karma’s a relaxing thought <3 aren’t you envious that for you it’s not? <33#taylor swift#swiftieposting
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sometimes i remember that not everyone is in pain 24/7 and that some people just walk around with a pain level of 0 on a daily basis and i just. i cannot fathom it. it legitimately sounds fake
#you mean to tell me that you wake up in the morning and aren’t immediately in some kind of physical anguish?#that you go to work and school and run errands and don’t get so exhausted that you have to sit in your car and cry in between tasks?#that by the end of the day your bones don’t ache like they’re about to crumble into dust?#I DON’T BELIEVE YOU#this has been my entire existence for over 11 years so i barely even talk about it anymore but GOD#i am so envious of people with functional bodies#y’all don’t even understand
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people say i'm jealous 😒 but my kink is watching you ruin your life 🤭 you losing your mind 🤪 you dyeing your hair 😬 people say i'm jealous 🙄 but my kink is watching you crashing your car 😁 you breaking your heart 😌 you thinking i care 🤔 people say i'm jealous 🤧 but my kink is karma 🤠💅✨
#karma's a relaxing thought! aren’t you envious that for you it's not! and so on and so forth#.txt#chappell roan
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i’m taking my time, taking my time cause you took everything from me
#feeling this song a little extra today#but i’m a big believer in karma#karmas a relaxing thought#aren’t you envious that for you it’s not#text#taylor swift
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it s difficult because i don’t think taylor swift karma is a good song. but she did make some points . and it is my boyfriend.
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Karl is my girlfriend Karl is a god Karl is the breeze in my hair on the weekend Karl’s a relaxing thought
#aren’t you envious that for you he’s not#sweet like honey Karl is a cat#purring in my lap cause he loves me
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You literally stan one of the most popular characters ever
That’s just called having taste babe
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have to see the abusive ex friend again today and tomorrow i fear
#anyway me walking into every rooms she’s in: karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend !! karma’s a relaxing thought#aren’t you envious that for you it’s not
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right where i need you
pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader
warnings: 18+ only. smut. established relationship. fluff. unprotected sex in the kitchen - sorry not sorry. and not much else, really! if i’m forgetting something pls lmk.
words: 2.3k
notes: i haven’t stopped thinking about him in that damn white tank since i first saw it and honestly i don’t know if i ever will. here’s just some random smut for you, inspired ofc by said white tank, please enjoy. thank you in advance for reading and as always - reblogs and comments are welcome and so appreciated! let me know what you think. 🩵
You can’t be held responsible for this.
It’s really not your fault.
He’s the one looking so…him.
It took one little look. And now here you are.
You’re not complaining! But when your phone starts ringing with texts in about fifteen minutes asking where you are and why you’re late, well��� you can deal with that later.
You had padded down the hall, hair and makeup done and dress unzipped with your heels in your hand.
Did you really need his help to zip it up? No. But you can’t pass up the opportunity to feel his hands on you, even for a second.
He got home not too long ago so you know where you’ll find him, but he hasn’t come into the room to say hello, so you’re not exactly sure how you’ll find him.
You started considering skipping out on girls night the second you heard him come in without his usual greeting, and that is still definitely on the table. You haven’t been seeing him as often as either of you would like lately, and as much as you love your friends, you had brunch together last weekend, it’s not like it’s been ages… They wouldn’t be too upset, you’re sure.
You decided you’d make up your mind when you saw Bucky.
You find him exactly where you knew you would. He stands at the kitchen counter, his hair mussed, shirt discarded as he’s clad in his black pants and white under tank. He’s hunched over a bit and yet he still looks so big.
You smile wearily as you assess him from behind. He seems tense and tired and you can easily guess why. He’s been working nonstop for the past two weeks, you know he’s exhausted.
You walk closer to him and he turns to face you as you near his back.
He may be exhausted but damn he always manages to still look good. You’re almost envious of his natural allure.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greets with a rumble as you reach out to touch him, your hand on his side as you step closer to him. His own find your waist as he pulls you in to hug you. “You look beautiful as ever,” he murmurs softly, holding you tighter than you’d expected.
“Hi, baby,” you ease back. It’s not a pet name you use often, but it slips so easily from your tongue as he holds you and you hug him back.
“Thought you woulda been gone already,” he says as you pull back from him, your eyes meeting as he keeps his hands on you.
“Not yet,” you say, “can you zip me?”
He smiles at you and you turn around, allowing him access to the zipper. He keeps a hand on your hip as he slowly works the zipper up the dress, taking his sweet time. Once he’s got it, he runs his big hand down your back and then settles it on your other hip, giving you a squeeze.
“Thank you,” you say, turning to face him once more, “So,” you broach, “how was your day?”
“Ah, we don’t need to talk about that right now,” he tries to brush off.
“Bucky,” you start to admonish before he interrupts you.
“Have I seen this dress before?” He asks as his hands wander along the fabric, his eyes following your every curve.
You sigh, letting it go for now, “No, it’s new.”
“Looks good on you,” he compliments.
“Thank you,” you smile with a titter.
He blinks at you, his eyes swimming with something you aren’t sure you can name as his big hands find your bottom.
“I’ve missed you so much, you know that?”
You nod, softening as you step closer to him, “I’ve been missing you, too.”
He gives your ass as squeeze as you lean into him and you don’t even realize you’re doing it as you let your gaze wander down his sturdy chest to where his tank top is still tucked into his pants. He’s so built and so big, you’re damn near obsessed. And God, you really have been missing him.
His warmth, his touch, his everything.
You only realize you were biting your lip as his thumb comes up to pull it from your teeth. And you only realize your hand has been drifting down his thick, strong torso when you brush the top of his pants.
You meet his eye and you need no other warning of what’s about to come as you see the longing there.
His hand is holding your face as he licks his lips without thought. His eyes drift from yours to your lips and then all at once he’s on you.
His kiss is fervent and hot as he leads you. You let him turn you as you’re entirely enraptured in his kiss. You don’t recognize the counter at your backside as you kiss him back until he lifts you up without warning. His strength is always so impressive to you as you yip and reach to hold onto him despite the fact you’re already sitting safely by the time you do.
Your legs spread enough to welcome him as he stands between them, your dress already ridden up your thick thighs. His kisses are incessant as he holds you, his hands and lips both wandering what belongs to him.
Your hands are in his thick, dark hair as he attacks your neck and you can’t help the moan that slips past your lips. You can feel his smile against your skin as he hears it, like music to his ears.
You pull him closer with your leg around him as he pushes up the material of your dress until it’s around your waist. His hands move higher and once he finds the top of your dress, he pulls it down too, taking your strapless bra with it. He unhooks it easily and tosses it aside while avoiding unzipping the dress for you.
His mouth is on your full breasts the moment he exposes them; licking, nipping, sucking at your nipples while your back arches and you moan at the feeling.
“Buck,” you eke out your plea, tugging at him.
He doesn’t stop but his hands do move down to undo his pants. He pulls away after a second and pushes them down enough to free his stiff cock. He pulls you closer to him and then drags your silky panties down, tossing them with your bra before he situates himself back between your spread legs.
The feeling of his hand on your bare thigh is enough to set you on fire. He squeezes the ample softness there as he feels you, letting his hand slide up your leg to hold your hip.
You’re definitely gonna be late now, but it really isn’t your fault. They can’t blame you. And even if they could, you don’t think you’d really care.
You’re pulled from your thoughts as you feel his cock head at your entrance.
“So wet,” he murmurs as he drags himself up and down your slit teasingly, earning a whimper from you. “I know, baby,” he chuckles, looking up to meet your puppy dog eyes, “I know. I’m gonna give it to ya, know exactly what you need, sweetheart,” he says, his words smooth as silk as he talks huskily.
He guides himself back to your slick entrance and right before he starts to push into you, he makes sure your eyes are on him, and of course they are.
You hold eye contact as he slowly moves into you, your lips parting on a gasp the deeper he goes. Your hands are messed in his hair again as your walls involuntarily squeeze his length inside of you.
“Fuck,” you breathe. You pull him closer, angling yourself to kiss him again as he slides the rest of the way into your tight pussy. He kisses you back just as fervently as before as he starts to pull out of you before thrusting right back in. His thick cock dragging perfectly along your tight walls as he fucks you. His hand tightens on your hip as you squeeze him again, his eyes squeezing shut as he moans in turn, but his pace never faltering.
You wrap your arms around his neck and press yourself to him as he holds your waist. His cock hitting deeper with his every thrust. You’re already on the brink of your orgasm as you bury your face in his neck, breathing him in as he fucks you in perfect time. His grunts and groans and moans fill your ears as your own spur him on.
“Missed you so fucking much,” he pants as he squeezes you again. You kiss his stubbled jaw, arching into him, “Missed you,” you mewl. You suddenly feel his thumb on your clit and you gasp out your moan.
“Bucky,” you cry, hands gripping his solid back.
“I got you, sweetheart,” he husks, “come on. Let go, baby. Come for me. Need to feel you come around my cock,” he grits, working your clit in tight circles as you clench around him, eyes squeezing shut and arms holding him ever tighter. “Need to feel you,” he begs a little quieter, almost as if he was talking to himself.
You can’t hold back any longer as his cock hits that special spot inside you once again while his thumb is ceaseless on your sensitive clit. Your face is in his neck as you quake against him, coming hard. Your body feels alight and electric, sparks of unadulterated pleasure shooting through you as you shudder and moan at the overwhelming feeling. Waves of ecstasy washing over you as you moan and whine in Bucky’s ear.
He doesn’t relent as he works you through your high and pushes himself closer to his own, praises for you and groans of his own pleasure sounding from him as he fucks you, making sure you feel every inch of him, his hands gripping your ass as he keeps you close.
Your walls pulsing around his length have him growling as he teeters on the edge of his orgasm, but it’s your soft moan in his ear as you hold onto him that really pushes him over the edge. You sound so pleased, so satisfied and debauched and it’s all because of him. It’s all for him.
You gasp as he comes inside you, curses of pleasure and your name on his tongue, his hot cum filling you up as he slows his thrusts. You feel his lips on your temple and then your cheek as he kisses you gently while he comes down. Your walls still squeezing him softly as you do the same until he finally pulls out of you, tucking himself away.
You hold his face in your hands, admiring him for a moment before you pull him closer for a kiss. He still stands between your legs as he lets you pull him further into you before you finally let him go.
“I’ve really missed you,” you murmur. “I know you’re off all next month, and we’ll be around each other, be able to make up for lost time,” you smirk coyly, “but,” you breathe, “still, I kinda just wanna stay here with you tonight.“
“Yeah?” he asks with a half smile, “what about girl’s night?”
“They’ll survive without me.”
“You really don’t have to cancel your plans for me, sweetheart,” he assures you, that look in his eye telling you more than his words. He doesn’t think you mean it, doesn’t want to seem like he wants you to stay just as badly as you want to… “I think I need some alone time, anyway,” he adds - now avoiding your eye as he speaks, and only fueling your previous suspicions as he fixes the top of your dress, taking a second before he wraps his arms around you. You let your own slide around his neck as he rests his head on your chest.
“I don’t think I believe you,” you reply easily with a kiss to his hair before you urge him back and get off the counter.
He watches you as you turn around, your back to him. “Unzip me?”
He does as you ask, after a few seconds.
You shimmy the dress off and don’t look back to him as you go for your phone set on the opposite counter. You shoot your friends a text letting them know not to expect you tonight as you feel Bucky at your back.
“You don’t have to stay for me,” he says again, even softer now.
You turn to face him, meeting his eye, “Tell me you want me to leave, and I will,” you say.
He bites his lip as he watches you intently, shaking his head a bit before he speaks, “I can’t.”
“Didn’t think so,” you smile triumphantly.
You take his hand in yours and pull him out of the kitchen, down the hall to your shared bedroom. He follows with no complaint.
“You shower, I’ll clean myself up a bit, then cuddles and talking, and then… round two?”
“And three,” he agrees, pulling your naked body against his still clothed one before he kisses you again. “And dinner somewhere in between.”
“Sounds good,” you smile against his lips. “The usual?”
He nods, “I’ll call it in when we get outta the shower.”
“We?” you quirk a brow, noticing the twinkle of mischief in his bright blue eyes just a moment too late.
You yelp as he picks you up effortlessly in his inhumanly strong arms, his mirthful chuckle sending butterflies alight in your belly as he smiles that charming smile at you.
“We,” he confirms, walking you both into the bathroom, with no complaint from you as you relax in his hold.
God, have you missed this.
#bucky barnes x curvy!reader#bucky x curvy!reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x plus size!reader#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky smut#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fluff#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n
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Bruce Wayne fucked his partners through the mattress—and it depended on who and why. If you know he’s Batman, then he’d fuck for stress relief, to uncoil the sickening knot in his belly. However, if you’re unaware of his nighttime activities and believe you’d just lucked up meeting Bruce Wayne, then he’d fuck for ego. He’s got a point to prove: all those years as a recluse hadn’t dulled his ability to grant a lady a good time; that the stories of his youthful adventures are true. (Though his ego bleeds over into Batman as well since he wonders if he’s too old to still be the Dark Knight. If he’s lost his edge).
Bruce’s stamina is insane. He’d have you spread on your belly while he drove his cock into you. One hand enclosed around your throat, the other encircling your waist, and his lips grazing over your ear. Warm gusts of air caressing your cheek with each huff and grunt. The faint scent of his cologne lingering within the atmosphere, though it had been toppled by the aroma of sweat and sex. “Fuck,” he gritted out,” so tight f’me, doll. Only for me. Mine, aren’t you?” There was pride in being the one to undo Bruce Wayne, to make him cuss and grunt like a caveman, to draw out his Gotham accent. He was usually so put-together and driven.
Time warped and melted whenever Bruce had you beneath him. Despite his age, (don’t let him hear that) he could fuck for hours, content to drive his cum back into your hole until he came again. In fact, he enjoyed the slickness. There was something about keeping you beneath him that soothed the territorial monster caged within him like Mr. Hyde. Rarely could you lure the possessive, emerald eyed, envious beast out; Bruce was old and had dealt with his fair share of women seeking an emotional response. But with the perfect concoction of circumstances could you shatter the manacles binding the dominating, jealous, spiteful side of him—and it was wonderful.
Dick Grayson (Dixon’s version) preferred to let his lover work for it. There was a tantalizing element to gazing at his partner while she straddled him, and attempted to sink down into his cock. Dick wasn’t girth-y like Jason or Bruce (nor as unshaven). No, Dick was slim and long—and pretty. Dick was shaven and trimmed, smooth and hairless if he could help it. He never liked to offer up unshaven goods; he thought it was rude.
“God, you. . . you ride like a pro,” he breathed out, nigh gasping as though he’d run a race beside Usain Bolt. A sheen of sweated coated his toned physique, and a scarlet blush left a fiery trail from his cheeks down to his neck. “Don’t stop till I say.” Dick is more selfish in bed than Jason. Unlike Jason, Dick knows he’s cute—pretty, even. He’s confident both in himself and his ability to be selfish and still make you cum. . . hard. He won’t hesitate to assume control if he’s not liking your rhythm, or if he just wants to be a little shit and knock your orgasm off kilter. “Oh, were you going to cum? Sorry. Didn’t notice.”
Speaking of orgasms, Dick cums beautifully, even when he’d rather be described as ‘’manly’’ and handsome. He couldn’t restrain the tremble of his muscular thighs, or quell the furnace roaring inside his belly, or freeze the stars bursting behind the paleness of his eyelids. “I know, pretty baby. I know. Tight, aren’t I? Let it out for me,” you cooed, caressing his sweat-slick, inky black curls. Dick nodded quick and desperately, coal black lashes falling over his oceanic eyes. “Yes. Yes. That’s it. Gonna cum again. Just keep going.” The power he’d stolen returned with a vengeance. He’d gone limp beneath you. Fucked out, his breaths tremulous and stuttered. Naturally, Dick’s palms found purchase upon your breasts, pinching and flicking your nipples before he exerted the last of his strength to lean forward and suckle one into his mouth.
(There’s hints of a mommy kink if you squint hard enough).
Jason Todd loved to see his partner deep-throat his cock. It’s a personal pleasure of his, the one time he allows himself to be selfish during sex. He’s not sure why it’s fascinating to him. Perhaps the sheer primality of watching you struggle to swallow his thickness intrigues him, excites him, causes the hairs on his forearms to stand at attention and the nerves within his body to buzz like a million bees trapped beneath his skin.“That’s right, baby, keep going. Till I see tears,” he murmured, as his large hands slithered up into your nape and tightened in your hair.” Show me how much you love me, baby.”
“What a beauty.” Jason’s chocolate smeared irises tipped backward, his slender hips bucking upward into the warm cavern of your throat, his cock spewing viscous ropes of pearlescent cum. Jason’s frame fell slack against the sofa. Sated. Only you could loosen the tautness in his shoulders like a ball of yarn. Boy, did he adore you.” I hope you can go all night. Cuz I got some steam I been needin’ t’ blow off.”
#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson x female!reader#dick grayson x oc#dick grayson x y/n#dick grayson x you#bruce wayne#bruce wayne x fem!reader#jason todd#jason todd x plus size reader#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#jason todd x reader#jason todd x oc#red hood#red hood x reader#red hood x you#dick grayson headcanon#dick grayson#dick grayson smut#nightwing#nightwing headcanon#nightwing x reader#nightwing x you#batman#batman x fem!reader#batman x reader#batman x you#bruce wayne x you#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne x y/n
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jade my lovely, i would kill for more early season spencer and bombshell!reader. i love them sm!! (i also love seeing the mentions of elle, like that’s my bbg)
“You aren’t still mad.”
You take a sip of your coffee and refuse to answer.
Elle rolls her eyes. It’s unrestrained, as is her deep sigh. “Whatever.”
You drink more coffee. Think about it, can’t contain it, “Whatever yourself, Greenaway.”
“I want it just as bad as you do.”
“But I’m better.”
“You’re not better. You’re less likeable, there’s a difference.”
You weren’t surprised when they chose Elle for the open BAU position, but you were gutted nonetheless. Pretending it doesn’t bother you comes easily, just not when she’s rubbing it in your face. “Can you leave that?”
She hands over the stapler she’d been about to put in her cardboard. You don’t own one, and you decide to forgive her when she hands it to you without argument. “You want anything else?”
“No, it’ll just remind me of you.” You sniff.
“At least you’ll have an empty desk beside yours for a while. It’ll be good for your afternoon meditation.”
“Hopefully, they’ll fill your absence with a very attractive new recruit.” You’d like that, a hottie to crush on. Now Elle’s leaving, you’ll have no one to project your fantasies on to make it through the work day. “How will you cope?”
“What, without you?” Elle asks.
“With all the BAU hotties. Everybody on that team is maddeningly attractive,” you say with a put upon swoon, back of your hand curled and thrown to land against your forehead.
“I didn’t realise you felt that way about Jason Gideon. Perhaps if you’d made that known, you’d be packing your desk up instead of me,” Elle laughs.
“Well, maybe not Gideon. But the rest of them. Derek… if you take him seriously, he’s gorgeous. And Hotch–”
“He’s married. And older than us by ten years.”
“He’s handsome, is what he is. So quietly funny and moody. I’m not telling you to ruin his marriage, I’m just saying he’s distracting.”
“And Spencer Reid?” she asks.
You grin. “He’s cute.”
“Morgan said you asked him out for coffee?”
“He wanted to tell me about water bugs.” It was sudden but sweet, he’d started a tangent on how they can walk on water because they’re small and hydrophobic, then asked if you really wanted to know, which you did.
“He’s cute,” Elle says, raising her brows.
“Have you seen him turn to the side? His jawline is ridiculous.”
“He looks a little… dorky,” Elle says finally. She isn’t mean-spirited, just honest about her tastes.
“I like dorks. And I really loved him, he was adorable. Derek’s been hazing him, so maybe you could be nicer? I think he really needs a friend.”
“You don’t want to be that friend?”
You smile. “I do. But I can’t exactly do that from Sex Crimes.”
“Well, you can help me carry my stuff to the BAU. Come on.”
“And look desperately needy? Is there anything worse than going where you’re not wanted?”
“Morgan will be happy to see you. Maybe Dorky Spencer will be there to tend your BAU shaped wounds.”
“You’re heartless, Greenaway.”
You put your arms out obediently for her box. She grabs her jacket and her bag, gives her desk a last sweep, and turns away. It’s the last time she’ll ever sit at her desk in the Sex Crimes Unit, and it’s the most envious you’ve ever been of a friend. You want more than anything to be in her position. Profiling isn’t mythical to you, it’s a science you’ve studied, and you believe you could do it well if they just gave you time to learn on the job like they’ve done for Elle.
But the position is filled. There’s no room left on the team.
No need for a sex crimes expert now they’ve chosen Elle.
You’re going to have to make yourself useful in other ways, or play politics, or, better, make friends.
Hotch likes you, you know that, and Derek’s awesome. Gideon is the one you need to convince, but for some reason he’s totally sworn off of you. Luckily for you, he isn’t out in the BAU office when you enter, it’s just Derek, Spencer Reid, and Elle’s waiting desk.
“Hi boys,” she greets.
Derek turns.
Spencer puts down his book. You meet his eyes.
You’re far more flirty than Elle. “Hi, Derek. Hi, Dr. Reid.”
Derek grins and takes Elle’s box from your arms. “Hi, girls. Happy moving day.”
You don’t really want to talk about it, think about it, or come off as a jealous jerk, so you do a little bit of performance. “What are you reading?” you ask Spencer, pretending to be interested, hoping he’ll throw you a rope. You spot a familiar creature on the cover and your smile legitimises. “Is that about pond skaters?”
“It’s Small Freshwater Creatures,” he says, shy but somehow firm, too. His tone changes as he relays facts. “It’s an identification guide, but it does talk about the specifics.”
“You really like bugs, huh?”
“I wanted to know more about it in case you came back.”
You can’t help grinning. “That's really sweet,” you say earnestly, “did you learn anything new? You sounded like an expert already.”
“They’re predators. They eat mosquito larvae.”
“Oh, awesome, so if we had a few more pond skaters in the world we’d be better off.”
You prop yourself on Spencer’s desk as he begins to rattle of facts and figures. Not too far away, Elle and Derek talk under their breaths.
“Is it me, or is she into him?” Derek asks.
“Maybe more than she realises.” Elle bites back a smile, stealing glances at you from over Derek’s shoulder. You’re more interested in what he has to say than anything she’s seen on you before. You lean in, your eyes bright. A little flirty, ever so slightly teasing, but genuine, too, as Spencer begins a quick spiel.
“Well, he’s a goner,” Derek laughs.
Elle doesn’t know about that. You don’t play with people’s hearts.
There’s a teeny, tiny strand of shyness to you as you touch your neck. You begin rolling the chain links of your necklace along your finger, causing poor Dr. Reid to lose his train of thought. Two people entirely unaware of the road they’re embarking on.
“Do you guys have a stapler?” Elle asks. “I lost mine in the divorce.”
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction
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i hate how people will always get mad at me when i complain abt the military as an institution and yell “respect the troops” and then when the 4th of july rolls around they are popping fireworks so fucking loud you’d think a fucking bomb just fell from the sky
#marzi speaks#no this year’s early fireworks have yet to start#and no i have not been phblicly trashing the military lately#but this still happens and it still pisses me off#esp bc like they think i don’t have any clue of what the army’s like#my dad is an army vet. he has told me many a story#almost all of them involve someone getting hurt and/or incredible amounts of inebriation#he told me he once witnessed an army buddy do a whip-it from the trash can. said buddy promptly passed out and pissed himself#he’s told me the story of the time he knocked out a guy with one punch. some skinhead-looking assholes were harrassing him + his buds#(who were fresh out of the army and as such had fresh army buzzcuts)#and one of them made a motion like he was gonna pull out a gun#so my dad cold-clocks him. and this guy’s buddy goes ‘i’m sorry i’m sorry we’re on shrooms i’m sorry about him please let us go’#my dad has told me of the time some disaster happened in kuwait- he thought it was an attack but it was an accident of some kind#things blew up. my dad got shrapnel in his hand. my dad passed out from pain the only time in his life#none of the army stories my dad has told me are things i would be envious of. including the funny ones#the ONLY thing i’m even a little jealous of is the fact that when he did night patrols in kuwait he saw jerboas in the sand and they’d chill#that is IT. and doing night watches sounds like ass. i can probably go to the zoo and befriend a jerboa that way. not worth it !#my dad has actively discouraged my brother and i from enlisting our whole lives. it is one of the few things we aren’t allowed to do#(which i’m fine with bc hell if i’m doing all that to myself they BREAK you there)#also since when was the military as an institution the same as every individual soldier. i hate the military because of what it DOES to them#i am doing far more to ‘respect the troops’ than your anti-homeless ‘ptsd-isn’t-real’ ass ever will. fuck right off and suck my dick#idk that shit irritates me so bad bc i know these motherfuckers don’t do shit to benefit their local vets. it’s hypocritical + performative#and it pisses me off so bad
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