#are you trans if you dont experience dysphoria? i say yes

[sunny-daze-days]

Being Trans and not experiencing gender dysphoria that strongly has got to be one of the weirdest experiences I've ever felt.

Do I know I'm a man? Yes.

Does not having a you know what downstairs feel like not having on a ring you've had on for years? Yes, I feel like I'm missing something.

Do I wish I had a flat chest above all else? Yes

But it's not debilitating. I'm just there. My body is just existing. is it kind of shitty I don't have a flat chest and a you know what? Yeah, but my brain isn't as concerned about it as other Trans men are and I think that's one of the reasons it's like taken me so long to come out and validate myself as a Trans man.

Like when I was introduced to the concept of being transgender, gender dysphoria was like presented as almost a requirement for being Trans, if that makes sense. Like I thought because I didn't feel gender dysphoria (at least not much, I felt gender euphoria more) that I somehow wasn't Trans enough.

Does anyone else thats Trans (man or otherwise) also feel this way? Genuine question

[muirneach]

i would like to express three blanket statements for everyone in the notes:

- yes i obviously know that calling people ‘family’ is a way of referring the other queer people. this is evident in the fact that i used that fucking word in the post jesus christ guys you don’t need to try and inform me of this

- related, but this was a rhetorical post. i do not need advice on how to talk to people. i am involved with real life trans groups and am well versed in how to subtly talk to people. i literally made this post while on break from my bad customer service job after seeing multiple trans customers

- maybe this is a me problem but people having dysphoria from being seen as trans is sad to me. like i sorta get it but also hm maybe work on ur self hatred idk. being trans is a joy

reading comprehension questions:

consider the targeted demographic of this post. then consider, do you dislike this demographic? if so, please try changing your opinion or at least scroll away and stop bothering me about it

did the author make reference to old forms of queer communication? if so, it seems like he is familiar with the concept and perhaps refrain from informing the author about it

why might have the author, at first glance, described dysphoria as self hatred? did he really do this, or does he rather acknowledge that one facet of dysphoria stems from depression and deprecation? consider why someone might not want to be seen as trans. is it for safety reasons, or because they have yet to unlearn the perceived shame of being trans, or any other multitude of reasons? any reason is perfectly valid but one may wish to examine their opinions on the cis view of the trans body

seeing trans ppl in public is literally life giving. wish there was a normal way to express to other trans people in public that we’re family and that i love them

[frankotalk]

you have to admit its pretty funny that transphobes will go red in the face screaming and foaming at the mouth because their basic understanding of gender is being challenged while somewhere in the world some trans person is chilling in a hammock drinking from a coconut with a bendy straw and a little umbrella

[thatfeyboy]

I need to know why it makes people so unreasonably upset to suggest that some dysphoric trans people probably should be considered intersex. Do you just. Hate trans people? Or is it because anything that makes trans physical isn't allowed?

It has been stated many many times that not all trans people have dysphoria, and not all trans people that do experience the same dysphoria. It has been harped on that gender is social and about presentation and isn't binary. Fine. But somehow when I or people like me talk about having physical and immutable dysphoria that doesn't stem from social means it's not ok. When I bring up that yes, some parts of the brain control your hormones and gonads, and yes, some parts recognize what you are and should look like, im treated like a fucking gender critical.

Why is it wrong to say that parts of the brain do in fact qualify as sex related because that's what they are for? If they dont physically square with the binary(naturally, not through intervention) then that person is not binary/intersex in their physical disposition by definition. It's not exactly a hard concept to grasp.

And because I have to, no, most aspects of the brain are not related to our bimodal sex system. There can in fact be gender/sex nuance in certain parts of the brain without claiming male and female type brains exist as a whole. Fear of some shitty crack pot idea should not prevent people from understanding scientific inquiry and research.

Being intersex does not make the trans experience more or less valid/real. But I'm tired of pretending I'm a man for reasons that absolutely don't apply to me. Nothing about my being trans has anything to do with how I want to socially be, aside as an extension of others viewing my body as I wish it to be. If there is really room in the community for all of us, then my saying that some of our experience is different shouldn't be a problem.

EDIT: Thank you for some of your responses. I would like to amend my statement slightly. When I mentioned intersex I was more trying to imply, as I lacked a better word, that it is clear some if not most trans people that experience dysphoria have a physical developmental reason for that, likely epigenetic, genetic, and pre natal conditions. This type of sense is in most people, including cis people, hence why you cannot train someone to be a gender they aren't(no desistance of gender identity in both cis and trans people regardless of treatment). If intersex is to be interpreted as things exclusively affecting external or internal primary sex traits(as to be read, physically involved in the act of procreation) that are only ever natal, then I am ok in accepting intersex is not the best fit(except for that PCOS study but not super relevant rn).

That being said, I do still believe it is a part of sex and sex/gender development and that it is a physical condition(most anatomy based dysphoria). I don't see why it being a part of sex and sex development is a problem, when it has no other answer that satisfies our actual understanding of the condition and those peoples experience. Anything based on socialization has been disproven time and time again, so when are we going to stop acting like this

[angelsstranger]

not to bitch and moan but today i (he/him tme transsexual dyke) remember my transmasc roommate of days past and the time he saw me wearing a skirt and said “if i dressed like that I would want to kill myself”

always sort of insinuating that a “real” trans person couldn’t be gender nonconforming..

and eventually of course devolving into the “trans women actually have more privilege than me somehow and i feel threatened by them” which turned into “in the future i dont want to live with AMABs again” yes that second one is a direct quote there was so much more to the convo it ended our friendship quite abruptly and messily.

but my point being transmascs using their own dysphoria and their bigotry they inherited from their family as a weapon against trans women is soo much more common than you think it is. this person was supposedly a leftist and was friends with/trying to date many trans women at the time. it unsettled me how he would imply he found these women untrustworthy at the time but also he approached specifically trans women again and again looking for their patience nurturing and support even asking them for money and favors. before again pivoting and returning to the i think shes a bit TOO into me and its creeping me out.

my takeaway was basically it is your responsibility to tell trans women if they are seeing or hanging out with someone who says terfy shit behind their back. protect your community to make sure nobody has to experience that type of violence (to be clear the violence im referring to here is: someone trans or cis who wants to date/sleep with trans women but continues to imply trans women are dangerous or untrustworthy, eventually discarding each woman they bring into their life for vague reasons which all stem back to transmisogyny)

i was so distracted by how every time i tried to discuss with HIM the harm he caused he would break down cryinf about how fragile he is and all the trauma in his life and i was hesitant to let my friends know the transphobic things he said about them because i thought it would hurt them a lot (ignorant on my behalf. once i finally told my friends i realized i should have warned EVERYONE the very first time i saw this behavior) i didn’t want to seem like i was shit talking him or being rude to the women he was seeing but by the end of our friendship that was one of my greatest regrets. I personally try to honor this mistake by fucking never letting something like this slide ever again and being a reliable friend to the trans women in my life by telling them honestly if i don’t trust someone i see them associating with. that type of passivity in our communities is something that also puts trans women at risk.

since coming back to tumblr ive seen a lot of transmascs harrasing trans women here and the sense of entitlement and the need to frame trans women as a threat to your individual comfort and safety is incredibly harmful and selfish. it reminds me of that shit i watched going down two years ago with my room mate and i really don’t like seeing terf ideology spread by other trans people. check yourself and imo leave trans women the fuck alone if you are still unlearning that shit. stop inviting trans women on dates and hangouts if behind their backs youre insinuating they are untrustworthy or violent in some way. that is so evil ok send post

[hockeyisforthegays]

firm believer that yuuji realises her indifference to fashion (she has preferences but not strong interest) is because of a certain amount of gender dysphoria that she was entirely unaware of before realising shes trans. even after transitioning shes still stuck in the "function over form" mindset until nobara starts bullying her into wearing cuter shit.

her being into like, cute athleisure but also like... over the top cute/creepy/gothic fashion is so... she has such weird taste canonically i love her being into weird fashion♡♡ (i say weird with immense affection in my heart)

nobara & yuuji as besties is like. 50% of my trans yuuji headcanons ngl. nobara suddenly going "i suddenly find you less annoying now that you're a girl. huh." and yuuji just. unsure if shes insulted by that or not.

ALSO

pairing this with itafushi in which megumi does a big old 🏳️‍🌈✖️❓🤨 because he kinda figured he was gay before yuuji transitions and now hes ???

and of course yuuji not changing her name & people getting confused about which is which between her & megumi when nobara or gojo or maki or whoever talks about them

plus like. t4t itafushi where megumi is a trans guy... gojo out here with experience with trans kids pulling out his wallet like "imma make this girl's entire year :)"

hi anyway i saw your reblog of my egg yuuji comic & was reminded that i love trans yuuji ♡ (starfai is my main/snailmp3 is my sideblog)

YES. LITERALLY THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUTTTT the eternal trans experience of oh i dont care that much about how i dress (changes gender) oh i. well hm. this can be joyful actually?

yuuji in creepy cute is so perfect wait. her horror movies... wearing cutesie-fied human earthworm earrings she got off etsy... nobara is like those are ugly as SIN and she's like??? D: theyre so cute though??? and the movie is about LOVE???

t4t itafushi reallll im too about to fall asleep to say anything coherent about it except ITS SO REAL

[wanderingcritter]

quick question, and i mean no hate or disrespect, but how can you not support/like transIDs when you use a transID (Transspecies)? /genq

Thanks for asking about this! I get that it can seem confusing or contradictory to some so Im happy to discuss it :)

For one, transspecies isn't transID, it's just.. a regular trans identity. The term transspecies has existed within the alterhuman community for literal decades, long before the creation of the "transID" community. It's a term that has quite literally been stolen and appropriated by a group of people who the majority of alterhumans dislike and want no part in. In terms of origin, function, and social implications, it is infinitely more comparable to being transgender (an identity i don't see ever being included in transID specific discussions) than it is to something like "transBPD".

Secondly, even if it was somehow transID (which again it's not), it still doesn't carry any of the same discriminatory mindset or just flat out impossibility of existence the way most transID do. Species identity and the idea of what it means to be "human" is almost entirely socially constructed, not completely dissimilar to gender. There are rules and de facto societal ideas about how someone must "be a human", which not everyone can neatly fit into. It is something experienced by all beings living within human society, and is therefore something that can be transitioned away from or out of. Whereas something like being autistic is not socially constructed and not something someone can simply transition into. While yes, there are certainly social implications, expectations, and roles placed upon autistic individuals, autism itself is not a social construct, it's an actual tangible neurological phenomenon, making it impossible to be "transautistic".

This ideology also promotes discriminatory beliefs against minority groups. It dismembers and fetishizes the lived experiences of entire cultures, communities, and individuals, lived experiences these "trans" individuals will literally never have. If you are not "cis autistic" you will never ever truly know what it is like to live as an autistic person, no matter how badly you want to. Same can be said for other transID identities. I understand that atypical dysphoria does exist (hell, I have some of my own), and I dont doubt that these are real emotions people have, but that doesn't make it okay to try and say you actually are those things and impose yourself upon groups of people you are not part of. I guess if someone has a harmless transID like "trans brown hair color" or smth then I don't really care all that much, but otherwise I have zero tolerance for people who believe they can forcibly integrate themselves into an entire culture just because they feel like it.

TLDR: Transspecies isn't TransID it's just regular trans, but even if it was I would still support it because it doesn't promote discriminatory and fetishistic ideas about certain groups of people.

[velvetvexations]

I think half of some of the issues some trans fems have with trans masc stuff is that some people find being seen as a woman to be traumatising and would rather deal with the trauma and danger of being seen as a failed man or faggot, like it's not appropriating anything it's that women find it traumatising to be seen as men and men find it traumatising to be seen as women like it's not appropriating for trans fems to find experiencing standard misogynistic sexism as affirming (which some women have found, even if they also find it upsetting or find upsetting at a later date)

a lot of it is very unhealthy though and directly leads to things like "yeah I'll believe I have power I don't have because it makes me feel more secure in my masculinity"

Velvet I hate to say it but yes they do in fact think that when men are sexually assaulted or beaten for any reason they are taking on a woman’s role in society. I’ve tried to pick apart how that narrative is just. Horrendously anti-feminist in my eyes - that’s what you think a woman’s role is/must be? holy fuck - but uh. Yeah. Yes.

TRFs will be like "my status as a woman objectively exists because Woman is an underclass in patriarchal society that I am classified under" and then you're like "so we should get minimize those classifications and drain them of meaning right" and then they suddenly go real quiet because they literally don't know how to conceptualize themselves except as someone who experiences misogyny

sad tragic terrible day: not one but two artists I had a lot of respect for decide to be a mask-off transandrophobe. sigh. at least I can always rely on you to have good takes and massive tits 🫡

my tits are huge and my love is boundless

why is it always the most insufferable people tilting at windmills. there are enough actual problems they could focus their self-righteousness on, but they'd rather imagine insane shit to attribute to other people.

scoring notes spreading malicious lies about other trans people on a dying social media site is more fun than dealing with the ongoing genocide targeting all of us

I get sooo pissed off by trfs going "listen to oppressed people about their oppression!" Because what they mean is "listen to us that this other group's oppression is Actually Our Oppression and them talking about their experiences and ppl listening to them talk about their experiences is Transmisogyny"

lmao literally

howdy velvet, here to leave a thought i had- 1 tumblr recommending me a transradfem blog in my "similar to those you follow" which was like. 3 fandom posts before it gets right into some of the nastiest overtly transandrophobic shit. and 1 tumblr stop recommending me people who dont think transmasc people are real people because i follow blogs who talk about....the opposite of that.... even if they reblog 1 (one) fandom gif. The main point is- JESUS christ do these people get really cruel about transmasc bodies like. immediately. its pivoting to calling us the c word and insulting dicks like we're all "smol beans" and its like....man. fuck is wrong with these people. why do they immediately feel entitled to shit on people's bodies?? it's just such an immediate kneejerk. total lack of consideration for other trans people's possible dysphoria and you know. just, not being a huge asshole.

I'm sorry, anon. No one should be treated like this.

You know something that really bother me is that people (who are not Ukrainian) act like basically 70 years of Ukrainian history is just a complete black hole. Was the Soviet era difficult? Of course. And bad at times? Of course. But it wasn’t literally nothing. The way these people discuss like Ukraine froze in 1930 and only started existing again in the 90s make me so uncomfortable. We weren’t “poor people starting entirely over 🥺 they are basically so far behind”. People still made things and made good memory and lived and loved and had family. It wasn’t literal misery all the time. And it really makes me uncomfortable when people act like it is, unless my whole family and bf’s family and everyone else is lying about good memories of their child hood or young adult hood I guess. It somehow is giving white savior despite most Ukrainians being white (well debatably, depending on how white you find Slavs but that is other conversation) especially when coming from Americans. Okay I guess you also must have nothing good going on ever because you are under bad government too right?

People are chronically unable to deal with other people as actual people, even when in sympathy.

[bunnyreaper]

STRUGGLES TO THINK OF A REQUEST!!!

SOMETHING REALLY SOFT AND FLUFFY WITH GN/TRANS MASC READER?? LIKE PRAISE N STUFF; MAYBE READER IS A VIRGIN OR SMTH !!!I GET DYSPHORIA WITH AMAB READER BUT I DONT WANT TO BE CALLED A GOOD GIRL EITHER YK??

ps look at my gorgeous man

okay, wrote a lil gn!reader x gaz, with birthday theme!! it's a bit silly but i hope you enjoy!! mild 18+ below + alcohol consumption!

Being in the army was never convenient. Thrilling, challenging, life changing, yes--but never, ever truly convenient. 

You suppose the universe took pity on you somewhat, as the stakeout in a sweltering hot campervan had been moved forward to yesterday, narrowly missing your birthday, but only just.

Today you're still left with the fatigue of the late night you pulled staring down binoculars and making the awkwardest small talk ever with Ghost.

But, today at least, you'd entered the rec room of the Los Vaqueros base to the most pleasant surprise. 

Kyle must have spent the whole afternoon preparing it, as there were balloons and bunting and even a small cake waiting for you when you arrived--as well as the man himself, all soft eyes and beaming smile. 

The cake has long since disappeared (largely courtesy of Johnny), and you've both been making your way through a fairly expensive bottle of tequila, one shot at a time. 

The Captain didn't stick around for too long, and Ghost headed to bed after him and Johnny swept the floor with you and Kyle in a particularly heated game of beer pong. 

Johnny is currently drooling into the couch cushions as you and Kyle try and finish off the last of the tequila while playing Never Have I Ever. You're a few rounds in, and Kyle is rapidly realising that there's a lot of things you haven't done.

"Never have I ever... had a threesome." Kyle says, with a shrug and a melodic laugh, and is unsurprised when you don't drink.

"Never have I ever had a twosome, even." You counter with a snorted laugh.

Then, mortification washes over you, as you stay stock still and wait for the realisation to catch up to Kyle.

"Oh, you've never...?" His lips part and his eyes widen adorably, but they hold no judgement within. 

"Nope." You shake your head, taking a hefty sip now anyway to deal with the blush of your cheeks at such a reveal. 

Kyle follows suit out of habit, his face scrunching at the taste. "With anyone?" 

"Nope, I've done some things but... no one I wanted to go all the way with." Really, you aren't embarrassed about this detail in particular, more so that you're sharing it with Kyle, who you've been crushing on pretty much since you first laid eyes on him. 

"Well then." His initial surprise dissipates, replaced with an entirely too sweet smile that just makes you melt. "Hope you find them soon, if you're ready." 

His voice is laced with sincerity, and as you get lost in his gaze all you can think of is that above everything, you're so thankful you get to call Kyle your best friend. "Thanks for not being weird about it." 

"Nothing to be weird about." He says, completely nonchalant as he reaches out, his hand resting on your arm to rub reassuringly. "Though I do think you're missing out." As he says those final words, his face splits into a smirk for the ages, before he wraps his lips round the bottle once more. 

"Oh I know I am, trust me." You groan, desperately wishing to experience everything you hear people talk about, especially with Kyle. 

"Tequila brings out the wild side of you, apparently." He chuckles. 

You shove him playfully, knowing deep down you haven't gotten as wild as you could. "You say that like it doesn't do the same to you! I remember when you were doing shots in that bar we went to, and you ended up shirtless on the dancefloor." 

He hangs his head in embarrassment, but smiles through it anyway. "Thanks for reminding me of that." 

"Anytime, Kyle." You wink, the alcohol making you just a little bold. "Think I might head to bed though, actually." Best to go now before you end up straddling him right here, you think.

"We outlasted Soap, so I'll call that a win." He screws the cap on the tequila before setting it down on the table and offering you a hand to help you stand.  "Did you enjoy yourself?" 

"I really did, thanks for remembering." You smile, trying to fight the urge to rush to him for a hug. "I'll clean up in the morning." 

"Let me walk you back to your room, yeah?" He offers his arm now, allowing you to hold onto him as the two of you make your way out of the rec room.

"Oh, you're being extra nice, it must be my birthday." You tease, eyes ahead so as to not focus on the muscle you're clinging to and the heat radiating off him.

At that, he gasps. "You're my favourite person, I'm always nice to you." 

"If being cheeky is nice, then sure." 

His head dips down ever so slightly, and he stops walking for just the briefest of moments, his voice almost a whisper. "It's how I show my affection." 

It takes everything within you to not fall over your feet then and there. 

"Does that mean you have heart eyes for the Captain, because you're always being cheeky with him?" 

Deflect, deflect, deflect. 

"Why? You jealous?" He laughs, now properly coming to a stop outside your door. 

"Desperately." You drawl sarcastically, hoping he doesn't see right through it--and hoping he doesn't notice your shiver when he pulls away.

Things fall comfortably silent between you, as you stand and share fond looks. You swipe your key card, kicking the door open ever so slightly as you cling to his presence for a moment longer, not really wanting to go inside. 

"Kyle..." You begin, not really knowing what you'll say next. 

"Yeah?" His smile is so bright, so warm and loving that it almost hurts to lay eyes on.

"Thanks again." 

"S'aright." He shrugs it off like it's no big deal that he remembered, and made sure that everyone made a fuss. "Not too bad as far as birthdays go, I hope."  

Little does he realise, spending time with him is the best birthday gift you could ask for. Well, almost.

"Not bad at all, though I just thought of something else I want as a gift." Bravery courses through you, your brain ticking over into a needy territory where you just need something from Kyle--something beyond barely-there touches and friendly smiles. 

"One wasn't enough?" He teases, his eyebrow quirking and lips turning up in a way that makes him all the more attractive. 

"Nope." You take a step closer, and he makes no effort to retreat.

"Lay it on me then." 

And with those words, you snap. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down so you can slot your lips against his and pour out all your pent up feelings into kissing him silly. He tastes like tequila, and mint, and heaven, as he kisses you deeper and deeper, and sends your head into a bigger spin than the alcohol did.

He pulls away after a moment, pupils blown wide and hands still gripping onto you. "Fuck." 

"I mean, the actual gift I'd like would be a lot more... involved, but..." 

He pushes you through the door, slamming you against it as he closes it behind the two of you. "How about we make a deal?" He begins, before trailing kisses down your jaw, to the sensitive spots on your neck. 

"Oh?" You ask, voice barely there as light-headed dizziness and arousal takes over. 

"Tonight... I'll give you part of your gift, but the rest has to come when we're both sober." He whispers, his words full of promise. 

You whine as he nips at your throat, already wanting more, wanting everything. "You're no fun." 

He pulls away to meet your gaze, eyes sparkling as his hardness presses against you, and he flashes that oh-so-handsome smile. "If I'm gonna be the one to fuck you for the first time, I'm gonna make damn sure you remember it, yeah?"

[yourlocalmechanism-dr-carmilla]

Ill be talking abit about my trans experience, first some facts:

-i only want top surgery, no bottom surgery or hormone therapy

-my name isnt legally changed, sadly. I currently habe a first and a second name(more to my name later)

-i use he/they/it- i try it/its out so it may be temporary ^^

-i dont have a binder or tape(i meed to buy myslef tape goddammit)

-i luckily dont suffer from voice dysphoria or body dysphoria; idc about my boobs(they are a tool for me when i cosplay female characters, i am good at really drawing the line between character and me). Also i just want my uterus gone cause periods SUCK.

Sooo.. my sister was abit sleptical at first, as i wasnt the "typical trans guy" ..which was kinda not very nice, like i felt mot taken serious. And her and my younger sister did amde clmments "thats not very masculine" when i wore make up or "feminkne" clothes- they meant it as a joke but its annoying. I5 went quite quick with my parents, they adjusted and accept. But i jsut say i use he/him (as kn german tehre aint a term for they/them and i dont think they would go with it/its). Now i did had my fair share of names whuch i am not proud lf. Yes one of my current names is from a podcast i like- but my family outright refuses to use it. They use a outdated name i dont use anymore(not my deadname) which is like...it could be worse yet it still hurts. I think they will onyl avvept a name that "i picked oit myself and that ksnt from a fictional character i like" and then my dad ks like "you dont know who you are really..." which is like..oh thanks, now i have a identity crisis, well done! Or when he said that (the topic was therapy) "adhd isnt your biggest problem, you dint know who you are right nwo, you are in a transition" and its like..thanks parents. Hwo will i ever KNOW a name i like if you refuse tl adapt?theres a reason why i dlnt share stuff that bothers me with them, they wouldnt understand...atleast they accept my pronouns. Butnalso, thus causes me to invalidate myself sometimes...yea its not great

[apas-95]

i know it makes you feel good to take cheap potshots at me by misinterpreting what i said, but obviously “trans woman” as a category has to mean *something*, the point isn’t to say “cis people can be trans” which is false by definition, the point is that that’s about as far as you can get in terms of defining transness (i.e. not cis) until being forced to either

A) leave it at “to be trans is to identify as trans” which is exactly what ur seemingly railing against

B) “to be trans is to be identified as trans” which immediately raises the question of who and where, are transmascs that get clocked as transwomen actually transwomen? are cis gays that get clocked as trans actually trans even if they dont identify that way

or

C) “to be trans is to have xyz characteristics” which raises the question of who defines said characteristics, is there a consistent social definition, etc that ultimately gets tangled up with B

with B and C you open yourself up to really unfavorable positions (e.g., the whole concept of truscum/transmedicalism hinges on C, to be trans is to have dysphoria and/or medically transition.)

I'm not rallying for or against any of these positions, because they are positions on an issue unrelated to what I'm arguing - that the definition of being trans is to have a specific social relationship towards the axis of transphobia. How exactly one comes to have that position is immaterial to that.

Really, the position being stated is just the direct logical corrolary to 'all trans people experience transphobia', a generally accepted and uncontroversial statement. If all trans people by definition experience transphobia (and all cis people do not), then, re-stating, being trans is a group defined by experiencing transphobia. The thing that makes someone experience transphobia is unrelated to this issue. It does not matter, to this definition, what the mechanism by which people do or do not experience transphobia is. I am making zero statement on what makes people trans, no prescription of how any individual trans person must feel or understand their own transness, only a description of what transness is, for those that possess it. Regardless of any individual conceptions towards their own trans existence, it is social fact that being trans is the state of experiencing transphobia (in whatever form that may come), because without transphobia, without the existence of gender assignment at birth, being trans ceases to be a meaningful concept - the exact same reason we understand that labelling historic persons as 'gay' or 'transgender' in contexts where those socio-historically-specific concepts can be applied. Should society move past gender assignment at birth, 'being trans' as a meaningful social characteristic would cease to exist, and though people could still identify with the historic concept, they would not meaningfully be trans people in the social sense as it applies in our, current, society.

Personally, my position on how people come to be trans, which I again must say, is unrelated to the discussion at hand, is functionally, yes, that 'identifiying as being trans makes you experience transphobia', which is to say closeted trans people still suffer from transphobia, that passing trans people still suffer from transphobia, etc. In more direct relation to the point actually being argued, is that 'misdirected' oppression categorically does not exist - that regardless of the specific form any instance of oppression takes, regardless of what the person enacting that oppression personally believes, it only exists as a certain type of oppression in as much as it is harmful towards a given group - someone yelling transmisognyistic insults at a transmasc person is not enacting transmisogyny against the transmasc person, they are enacting transphobia against them; while the people being harmed by the specifically-transmisogynistic element of these insults are trans women, the effect of verbally assaulting a transgender person is transphobic oppression, regardless of any opinion the person assaulting them had on the matter.

These are, again, positions independent of what actually makes any individual come to be a member of a given group. They are a separate explanation of what being in that group means. They are positions about social groups, not about individuals.

[squimblr]

tw SA ment, oppression, transphobia etc

okay but sometimes we are treated badly because we're trans men or trans masc though. yes sometimes things are "run of the mill misogyny" or "run of the mill transphobia", where someone just hates women or trans people. but what about trans men who lose access to gynaecologists because of the M on their birth certificate? what about the unique inaccessibility of testosterone because it's a controlled substance? what about the terms "theyfab" or "tranny voice", that were made up specifically to mock transmasc and afab non-binary people? what about the "feminists" who developed the idea of "rapid-onset gender dysphoria", which is both ableist and transandrophobic, because it specifically targets trans men and especially autistic trans men. what about the people who say "trans men really are the men of the trans community" or "I hate all men, that includes trans men"? the myth perpetuated about testosterone supposedly causing "roid rage"? all things that uniquely oppress trans men and trans mascs. should we be referring to the corrective rape of trans men as lesbophobia because lesbians and queer women also experience it? the words exorsexism and transmisogyny exist for a reason, let other trans men describe their own experiences, you can't stop them from using a word.

Anon, i’m holding your hand when I saw this, the anger is not at our identity of men or masc, it is at us being afab and the perception of us as “confused women”. It is anger at our adjacency to femininity and our rejection from those roles that they wish to push on us. Women are the bottom rung of the ladder and femininity has always been used as an insult. That is 100% rooted in misogyny. Rejection from heath services are double ended blade of transphobia and misogyny, its used as a litmus test of identity because ‘well if we need these services we are still women, but if you want to insist you are man then you don't need it”. Cis women and transwomen get tested on this as well because misogyny is the common thread. I find it hard to believe if youve never been in a place “well if you really say you are then you must never been” and had to explain that yea things overlap and things are intersectional. I really dont know how to explain to you the “the theyfab voice/tranny voice” is also misogyny because that one is so obvious, you are deviating from the ideal performance of femininity. Rapid- onset dysphoric targets transmascs because it is an inherently misogynistic idea, that we are confused women, and it TERFs and such espouse that loudly, its a target on your denial of a set role and the inherent negative societal view of women. The man/masc part of our identities are nothing to these people if not entirely ignored unless its a used as a ‘gotcha’. Its also crazy how you completely somehow manage to miss, that yes, corrective rape is misogyny.  The idea behind it is ‘correcting a woman’. You literally listed “hey all these groups that experience misogyny experience this, so shouldn't we call it something else”. Please think for a second instead of angry yelling.

The reason I have an issue with the word transandrophobia is because it displaces blame and doesn't acknowledge the fact that we are dealing with misogyny. To say it is transmisogyny wouldn't be correct. I think it's important we come up with our own language, its just important we recognize the issue to work on solving it and use to talk about our experiences, not come up with words to use like weaponized therapy language and attack anyone else who so much as breathes the wrong direction as others. The fact i got fucking PARAGRAPHS and hate anons not even 5 minutes after posting something shows how fucking hair trigger this community is and its UNACCEPTABLE. It's one of the reasons i left the transmasc community because if i didn't say my feelings within the acceptable language or word of the week were using, I got bombarded and accused of the worse and dealt with misogyny and transphobia from my fellow brothers.. I’m not saying no one can use this, if you find it helps you go ahead i'm not the language police, but i do believe it erases the source of the issue and has become disgustingly weaponized and abused.

[jimvasta]

You shall pass!

Okay, I'm not Gandulf, but seriously, my trans babies, your day will come (if passing is your aim).

Two and half years on T and one year post top surgery now, and in past month I have had the following happen to me:

Asked if the birth mother of my child was in his life (by his new school teacher after meeting me and my husband) - Yes, I'm a seahorse.

Assumed to be a trans ally at an LGBT+ event.

Confused the hell out of a new GP at my surgery by saying I need a hysterectomy. (I saw the light bulb going on in her mind in real time as she read my notes)

Accidentally impersonated my husband on the phone after someone asked for Mr X, and of course that's me. I only realised after personal documents were sent to his email and not mine.

At the beginning, I thought I would always be mistaken for a butch lesbian - that was life and since I'm bi it wasn't all bad, but it's not good for the dysphoria.

Then my voice made me sound like a teenage boy, then I got fluffy stubble.

Now I have a deeper voice than my cis husband, and the big tough firefighters I work with these days all think I am cis (no, they aren't anywhere near as cute as the calendars make out, but a lot of them seem to think they are).

Anyway, my point is, just because you dont pass now doesn't mean you never will. It feels like a painfully slow process until one day you wake up and people just treat you like your gender.

Try to enjoy the Uncanny Valley stage if you can. Messing with people and fueling their confusion is petty, but it can brighten your day as you watch them realise they is a singular pronoun when they don't know if you are a he or a she and they are too afraid to ask.

Conclusion: I have seen too many handsome trans men and stunning trans women to believe the 'we can always tell' crew, and my daily experience is that an average person really can't tell after a couple of years of medical transition.

The day you look in the mirror and see the real you staring back is getting closer.

[decaydanceunredacted]

yay💞 trans ryan not!fic time. obligatory disclaimer this is not meant 2 be speculative at ALL or representative of all trans experiences etc etc its just for funzies hokay. i am crazy. but i am free

we'll do transguy ryan first. in my mind the timeline is that he starts seriously learning ab queerness sometime in high school, super burying himself online + in books all the time. tries to be a tomboy, butch, but it just doesnt rly work. so he tells spencer one summer, hey, i think im a guy. goes through senior year knowing but not telling anyone else, except for maybe a couple more friends, spencers mom. buys new clothes and keeps his hair short and his head down til the summer after graduation; doesnt even tell brendon hes trans once brendon joins the band, brendons just like alright cool youre a guy with a girly voice whatev. he does come out to him soon enough since they get pretty close but for the most part fully intends on keeping stealth, esp as the band gets bigger, bigger, and it seriously turns into a ticket outta there.

he doesnt manage to start taking t until around mid 2006 and the costumes + makeup help a lot a lot in dealing w heavy dysphoria+general discomfort around that time and with being perceived ssooo much so fast. he got top surgery around 07 and cabin era was yes in part to make a new album but also he spent it recovering. he was able to mellow out a lot in 07/08 in big part thanks to finally being comfortable in his own body. yay💖 idk if he'd ever come out publicly or stay stealth forever. maybe? anyway

tgirl ryan is a different story entirely. it starts sort of the same - finding blogs & books about queerness about halfway through high school, and it all resonates way too deep, too much. instead of coming out, she refuses to think about it and refuses to talk about it and refuses to let comments from the public, from the press, from her friends and bandmates and pete about could be pretty for a girl, and are you sure youre not gay? get to her. again, the makeup & the costumes are solace. bending and experimenting and maybe, sometimes, seeing herself in the mirror, and still being able to snap back into place: say see, dont worry, its just for show. and she doesnt really mean to ever let it slip but its 2007, theyre supposed to be making a new album but it sort of feels like theyre making a new -- something else entirely, and, well, theyre doing a lot of drugs. she asks, do you think im a girl? sort of vaguely, the ceiling is spinning and everyones quiet, too quiet, she almost thinks none of them are there and shes gonna sit up to see shes alone in her room, until jon says: i dont know, i think thats up to you. she sits up, and everyones looking at her. not judging; mostly just curious, confused.

ryan tells them, yes, she likes her name. it can be a girls name, right? she already chose it once. so they still call her ryan but they start calling her her in private, because, she says, hell no, shes not coming out to everyone. not any time soon, at least.

things are way easier, way more comfortable, just like that, for a while. being out to even just a select few is a big weight off; its easy enough to tune out everyone else. but as time goes on it becomes more and more obvious, its definitely not sustainable for the long term.

so the band falls apart. so its just her and jon. they do a couple shows and the venues are way smaller, the attention is dying down, and thats when she tells him, okay, i want to come out.

its just one interview, she tries to keep it lowkey, telling everyone in her immediate circle first and telling them yes, yes, please, call me a woman in public. dont make me do all the work.

so thats how it happens. its not easy, by any means, but she starts estrogen and lets her hair grow out and curl, smiles hard when jon refers to her easily, correctly on stage, in front of everyone, and so maybe its all worth it; to be comfortable like this, in her own skin. and maybe it pays off in ways she didnt even think of, too -- someone in the audience, one night, passing up a trans flag for her to put on the mic stand.

.

[druidshollow]

thank you flr saying it was validating i literally went ‘oh shit wait that might not be good’ right after sending it

ye ye!! honestly being trans is something i sometimes dont feel so great about, i guess as anyone who experiences dysphoria would but im trying to be more positive about it and also its exhausting to always be a bummer about something that i literally always live with yknow kdjghkd

[ihhfhonao3]

Some hate I’ve gathered over the past two (2) days because I think they’d make funny copypastas. Tw for rabid ableism and transphobia because that’s just what people do on here I guess lmao

Having gender dysphoria is being delusional; you are deluded about your own body to the point where you seek to change it to conform to misogynistic stereotypes. Calling someone delusional who is, in fact, delusional, is not, in fact, ableism. Being delusional is undesirable. Being mentally ill is undesirable. Saying otherwise is ableist. Everything you listed is indicative of being delusional, besides the disabled bit. None of what you listed has anything to do with being disabled. Using the term "neurodiverse" to identify yourself is as fucking stupid as using "biodiverse" to identify a plant. The human population is neurodiverse, our planet is biodiverse. "Neurodiverse" is a term neither coined, nor used, nor sanctioned by neuroscientists. "Queer" is a slur against LGB (HOMOSEXUAL) people. It is not an identity. Being a delusional misogynistic, science-denier like all trans and "non-binary" people are, has nothing to do with being LGB. Additionally, there is no oppression that trans people face for being trans. Being a furry is disgusting, as well as delusional, and, again, has nothing to do with being LGB. No furry is oppressed; people find them disgusting bc they simply, by definition, are. I don't even really know what the fuck "otherkin" means and I don't want to. No one cares about this niche bullshit, and no one is oppressed due to their attempt to be it. Other people thinking you're stupid, misogynistic, homophobic, insane, obnoxious, and revolting isn't, in and of itself, a form of oppression. Sometimes, others think you're stupid, misogynistic, homophobic, insane, obnoxious, and revolting bc that's precisely what you are. I'm here to tell you that anyone who uses the "identities" you listed (besides being disabled), and/or believes in the ideologies connected to them; that person is stupid, misogynistic, homophobic, insane, obnoxious, and revolting. Grow the fuck up. Stop talking about LGB people, and stop including us in your larping puppyplay creepy bs. Your ahistoric delusional porn-sick behavior has nothing to do with us, and it never has.

@ihhfhonao3 tried to "call me out" by reposting my page to their blog, calling me a bigot etc. yet when I responded to their post with logic and explained that as a gay man I do not accept an ideology created by pe do John Money, they deleted my comments and responded with infantile and massochistic messages. This is so typical of the left, their hypocrisy, and their love of censorship.

I do not intend to harm any individual, however I will not hesitate to call bullshit on an ideology that is absolutely harming people. Its harming children and young people, its harming women, its harming LGB people. I have been "radicalized" by my first hand experience of narcissistic trans individuals, and my observation of the interesting correlation between governments, and corporations promotion of the "progressive" pride flag and all things trans. I absolutely believe there is a nefarious agenda.

Have there been "gender non confirming" people forever!? Absolutely. But they havent used drugs and surgery to ruin their bodies. It was only ever a very small number of people that were so non conforming as to be "cross dressing." Someone told me the other day in all seriousness that they didnt think men should wear shorts. Peoples ideas about conformity and gender are all over the map. You can wear whatever the f you want to now... just dont tell children that they need to become sterile to "be their true selves."

Yes gender separate from sex is a construct. Its a normative set of traits. However these things are not at all concrete. To conflate ones biology with the clothes one likes to wear is NORMATIVE CAPITULATION! So why are the supposed rebels perpetuating NORMATIVE STEREOTYPES!?

Its ludicrous and is evidence that these people are actually weak minded victims of a massive psychological operation fomented many decades ago. These same people will say thats just a "conspiracy theory" and yet believe that "THE PATRIARCHY MUST BE SMASHED," yet want to give children's bodies and minds over to Pharma Corp and Rockefeller medicine!?

It is a psy op.

There are autogynaphilics, and there are gay men with internalized homophobia. These are mental states of confusion. They are not lifestyles to be celebrated or something to take pride in.

These people are not part of the LGB. They are hostile to everything that LGB is. Drag queens and transvestites are not transexual. You are not born in the wrong body. You are not too "butch" to be a woman, or to "femme" to be a man. Gender separate from sex is just a concept, a lens, a made up thing like unicorns. We can talk about them, but it doesnt make them real.

This is a nuanced conversation that must occur before its all out war and were literally murdering each other in the street. Thats what the puppet masters want. They want chaos. They want us hating each other. I dont hate people, but I do hate lies. And I will stand up to lies and liars till my very last breath.

Not all people who identify as “queer” are mentally ill, but you definitely are, OP. Seek help, please, as wanting to be dehumanized and suffering from violent mood swings are very serious signs of deep disturbance. Also I don’t believe you have the “spoons” to make a phone call, let alone rip out someone’s entrails.