#are uhh. really damn tiny actually

[space-ninja-fashion-show]

Sometimes running public exterminate bounties is a lot of fun, with really nice random squads who breeze through the mission together, stick together for multiple runs, and overall get up to fun nonsense

And then sometimes it's this

[muddyorbsblr]

onyx pt1

See my full list of works here!

Summary: You're stuck in the Avengers Compound because of an injury from your last mission, and you come across an adorable and affectionate little kitten.

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: language (no i'm not sorry, Rogers); talks of explosions and injuries sustained from explosion [let me know if i missed anything!]

Things to be aware of: one-sided crushing (but is it really…?)

An eerie silence served as your only company in the Avengers Compound the last few days, some of your teammates off to finish the HYDRA mission that left you injured while the others took time off to visit their families over the holidays. With the promise to keep their comms on in case they would be needed until the New Year.

Now all that remained in the Compound with you were a few junior agents that drew the ends of the short stick, Val, and Loki.

Sadly your teammate, friend, and occasional drinking buddy Val was out blissfully spreading holiday cheer throughout New York with her girlfriend.

And Loki? Well, the God of Mischief wasn't exactly on chummy terms with you. Didn't even so much as give you a passing glance when you were at mission briefings.

Which was a damn shame because what you would give just to get lost in those stormy ocean eyes.

You made your way to the pantry in the common room to replenish your stash of snacks, towing along a little wagon to help you on the way back. Every step had you feeling every square inch of bruising on the left side of your body that you got from being unlucky enough to be caught in the blast radius of an explosion at the HYDRA base you were trying to infiltrate with Shaun just a few days ago.

Your phone buzzed with a new message. "Speak of the devil," you muttered to yourself, seeing Xu's name on your screen as soon as you pulled up next to the elaborate barista setup, putting a few Lindor truffles in a small bag for your wagon. "Hey FRIDAY?"

"Yes, Agent Y/L/N?" the AI answered immediately.

"Could you make me a white chocolate mocha with peppermint while I raid the latest Costco delivery for uhh…supplies. Yeah, I'll go with that."

"Right away, Agent Y/L/N." The sound of the barista setup whirring to life filled the kitchen area as you checked on Shaun's message.

Thor just mentioned that he'll ask his brother to take a look at your injuries. Maybe get him to kiss it all better. He finished his text with a smirking emoji, along with some hand gestures that painted a less than family friendly picture, making you roll your eyes at the screen.

You recorded a voice memo for him. "You know that he'd need to actually be willing to look at me so that he could see the damage from the blast, right? And last I checked I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm Medusa reincarnated and I'll turn his Asgardian ass to stone."

You went on to the ridiculously stocked pantry to rummage the delivery that came just a few hours ago, trying to find a bag of Jalapeño Cheetos somewhere in the mix, when you heard a tiny meow from somewhere behind you. You looked to the ground to find a black and white munchkin cat looking up at you with wide blue eyes.

"Hi there, baby…" you cooed, surprised the adorable little creature hadn't hissed or scratched at you yet. Cats normally didn't take to you, which was a shame because you often found yourself fighting the urge to pick one up or stroke its head whenever you crossed paths with one during your errand runs. "How'd you get in here?"

The tiny kitten caught you by surprise with what it did next, walking up to your feet and proceeding to rub its cheek against your ankle, a little purr emanating from its small fluffy body. You decided to risk the hissing and scratching and bent down to pick it up, your heart melting once he placed his paws on your cheek and proceeded to nuzzle your face with his nose.

"Aren't you a complete darling." He settled into your arm as you carried him out of the pantry, a little whine escaping him when you placed him down on the counter. He stood on his hind legs and made grabby hands towards you, blue eyes wide and pleading for you to pick him back up. "Just a second, sweet baby, I'm just getting you something to drink."

You took out a tiny sauce dish and poured some cream into it, pushing it toward the kitten that responded with a slow blink and a meow before licking away at the rich liquid.

"I'm sure your owner's gonna crucify me for giving you that but I can't help spoiling little fur babies especially when they're as adorable as you are." You took a sip of the coffee FRIDAY had finished making before shouting out a question for her. "Hey FRIDAY, you have any clue who this little bub belongs to?"

It took a second for her to answer. "Negative, Agent Y/L/N. There is currently no other agent on the premises looking for their pet. I also see no collar on them and from a preliminary scan they do not seem to have a microchip on them."

Those words stopped the kitten from drinking to look up toward the ceiling and hiss at the source of the voice. He only relaxed once you started stroking his fur again, going back to drinking and letting out a few purrs along the way. "No owner, huh? Does that mean I can invoke Finders Keepers then?"

"It appears so, Agent Y/L/N. What would be your new companion's name?"

The kitten looked up at you, as if expecting your answer. You wondered briefly if he could actually understand what it was that you and FRIDAY were talking about. "How about Onyx? I know I know it's absolute garbage for originality to name a black cat after a black gemstone but--"

His eyes widened before he climbed up your arm, only stopping once he'd reached your shoulder to nuzzle at your neck again. "It seems he likes the name, Agent Y/L/N."

"Then it's settled." You placed a soft kiss on top of his head. "Hello there, Onyx."

You brought your new kitten back to your apartment, setting him down on your bed while you tried to take off your sweatshirt as gently as you could manage.

"Ah, fuck it," you hissed as you felt the bruising around your ribs, letting out a pained sound when you opted to whip the garment over your head as fast as you could instead. Your reflection revealed that the bruising on the left side of your torso was quickly becoming a frightening deep purple.

Onyx meowed from your bed, again standing on his back legs and making grabby hands at you, eyes wide with evident pain.

"What's wrong, little baby?" He placed his paws gently on your side when you made your way to him, pressing his nose to the skin near where your bruising began. "Oh don't you worry your pretty little head about those, sweetie. They'll heal…eventually."

He kept on pressing his face to the area, your heart melting for the tiny kitten even more realizing that he was pressing kisses to your wounds.

"You really are such a precious little bub, aren't you?" You picked your new kitten up, placing him on the armchair in your reading nook before setting an alarm for dinner in a few hours and settling into your bed. "Get some sleep, sweet baby Onyx. I'll see you in a few hours."

Your eyes had only closed for a few seconds before you heard another tiny meow followed by a soft thud, immediately making you sit up on the bed looking for the kitten. He'd already made his way to your bedside, standing on his back legs and reaching up trying to climb up the sheets.

"Alrighty then," you mumbled, picking him up and placing him on the pillow beside yours. You rolled over to lay on your right side to remove any pressure to your injuries the best you could, hovering your finger near Onyx's nose once you'd settled in. He leaned up and pressed his nose to your finger, paws kneading on his pillow. "Boop," you giggled. "Sweet dreams, baby."

Just as you'd closed your eyes to try catching an hour or two of rest before you had to eat again and take those pain meds that Banner prescribed you, your phone began to blare Immigrant Song way too loudly by your nightstand. There were only two contacts you gave that ringtone to and one of them was currently out with her girlfriend.

"Talk to me, Thunder," you muttered, groaning when your stretch to reach for your phone made your bruising smart a bit. "You all good over there?"

"Absolutely grand, Lady Y/N," the blond god's voice boomed from the other end. "I was just wondering if you could check on my brother, he refuses to answer his phone yet again."

"That's gonna be a hard pass from me, buddy. I've already been cut and bruised, I'm not too keen to add stabbed to that list. He's probably just practicing spells. Or out on a date." You winced at that last part, an irrational part of you flaring up with unwarranted jealousy at the thought of Loki out with just about anyone. "Just--I don't know, check up on him yourself when you get back. You can take a stab better than me anyways."

Thor sighed loudly, the low rumbling making Onyx step back from his pillow and start hissing at the phone. You stroked the top of his head to calm him down. "Very well then, Lady Y/N. Rest well. We're scheduled to return after nightfall."

"I'll have pizza here waiting for you guys. Bring your own mead." You clicked off and tried to get some sleep, having FRIDAY place an order for pizzas and wings for when the team gets back. Your new kitten padded his way over to you, resting his head on your outstretched arm and letting out a soft purr.

The sound of the Quinjet coming back roused you from your nap, along with the feel of little paws on your arm and Onyx nuzzling your cheek.

"Looks like everyone's home," you mumbled, pressing a few kisses to the kitten's head before making your way out of bed. "Come on, little baby. Time to meet the team."

With a whole lot of discomfort and groaning, you slipped your sweatshirt back on before presenting your hand to Onyx and patting your shoulder, prompting the kitten to climb up your arm and perch himself on the spot, nuzzling his face behind your ear.

The team had already arrived and filled the common area when you made your way there, some of them helping themselves to the pizza. Barnes and Wilson walked in with coolers, probably filled with chilled bottles of beer inside.

"Hey, there she is!" Shaun exclaimed, pulling out a bottle of Pepsi before making his way over to you and pulling you into an embrace. "How's the healing go--Whoa there." He took a step back as Onyx hissed in his direction. "Where'd you come from, little guy?"

You shh'd the kitten, pressing kisses to his little cheek to calm him down. "It's okay, baby, Shaun is a friend. One of the good guys." You turned back to your mission partner. "Shaun, this is Onyx."

"Always thought you were a dog person, Babes," Natasha spoke up before taking your arm and walking you to the food. "We leave for one day and you become a cat lady. Where'd you even find the time to go to a shelter and get baby blue eyes over here?"

"I didn't, actually," you answered the master assassin. "I just went to the pantry and poof there he was, meowing at my feet. Like the cat distribution system mailed him to me by magic or something." He nuzzled your cheek again before starting to knead at your face.

"And he doesn't belong to anyone? You're sure?" Shaun spoke up, backing up immediately when he tried to pet your new kitten and getting hissed at. "Easy, kitty. I'm a friend, I'm not gonna hurt you." The martial artist turned back to you. "He wasn't collared? Or chipped?"

"Nope. FRIDAY scanned him and everything."

"You wanna think about getting him chipped?"

Onyx hissed again at the question before swishing his tail around to curtain your hair around him, his little body shaking on your shoulder. As if he was silently pleading for you to not take him out to have him chipped.

"Don't you worry, baby. I won't get you chipped, I wouldn't hurt you like that," you cooed, letting out a little giggle as he placed his paws on your cheeks and nuzzled your nose, giving the tip tiny licks. You were so focused on your cat's affections that the bellowing of Thor looking for his brother was a distant muffled noise in the background.

Until he got to where you were standing and his booming voice was impossible to ignore. "What an adorable little beast you have, with you, Lady Y/N." Onyx buried himself in the crook of your neck, shaking at the sound of Thor's voice.

"It's alright, Onyx. It's just Thunder, he may be all big and menacing on the outside but he's just a fluff ball on the inside. Come on, go say hi."

The blond Asgardian approached you, examining your new pet carefully before a knowing grin graced his bearded face. "Hello, Brother."

A chill went down your spine at his words. "What the fuck d'you just say, Blondie?"

He motioned toward the kitten on your shoulder. "This is the explanation for his lack of replies on his phone. His absence from his quarters. Lady Y/N, the little beast hiding himself in your hair…is my brother. That is Loki."

In your stupor, the only words you could manage to say were, "Bitch what?!"

A/N: Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to the members of SAS, beloved besties, and fellow whores! I've had this idea doing a slow lurky crawl in the microwave that is my writing noggin for the last few months, and I'm so excited that I finally get to share it with y'all! Part 2 is coming in a few days, and then it's a coin toss on whether I'll be trying to end the year with crossing off some things on my writing todo list, or crossing off some titles from my Tumblr TBR 😳👀

everything taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @peaches1958 @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @lunarnights95 @superficialdomina @anukulee @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @tom-hlover

[purple-babygirl]

in the far corner of the forest V

Pairing: Orc!Bucky Barnes x human!f!reader

Word Count: 7,790 (you love me)

Summary: For the longest time, the kingdom has used Bucky as their number one fighter, forcing him to win their wars for them. The only thing he asked for in return after he was done was that they give him a wife, and they did. They handed him the orphan he picked on a silver platter; it wasn't like anyone would miss her. It would've been perfect if she actually wanted to be there though.

Warnings: 18+ content, mentions of bruised skin, idiots in love, feels, a little crying, a little angst, smut, oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected p in v (don't do that), multiple orgasms. I think that's all.

A/N: this is the longest part so far and no condolences to the jealous (iykyk) i love and appreciate you guys with my whole heart. also i suck at smut so please pretend to be aroused as you wait for the next part, thank you. please enjoy xx💜💜

~

She wiped her tears away, remembering Bucky’s words as she tried to calm down.

She bit her lip as her chest tightened at the pain she had heard in his voice, deeply regretting her part of the fight.

Did he really think she thought he was without feelings?

She might have seen him as a monster before, but that was in the very beginning when she didn’t know him at all, and she soon came to realize that she was wrong. Very wrong.

Her orc wasn’t a monster by any means. Not even close. If anything, it was the complete opposite. She saw him as a resilient soldier and admired the way he never lost the good things about him at war. To her, Bucky was a warrior; a hero.

Human or not, of course she treasured and cared about his feelings!

Bucky took care of her, brought her gifts without her ever asking, made her feel seen and heard and most of all liked. Loved even. He made her feel like she was some awesome friend worth laughing with and talking to.

She wanted to make sure that she made him feel the same way too. She couldn’t let him continue to believe the words he had said to her.

She opened the door of the cottage and looked outside, but Bucky was nowhere to be found. She sighed, shutting the door again and pressing her back to it as she thought about her next steps.

Life with Bucky was what she wanted, and she wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of that truth.

She fetched the cloth she had tossed away before moving back to the kitchen.

She had only known real happiness alongside Bucky and she was going to let him know that. She was going to whip the cream for that cake even if they had to do without berries.

~

She was almost done smoothing the whipped cream over the cake when she heard the door to the cottage open and close.

She quickly rinsed her hands, ready to go out and make things right.

When she stepped out of the kitchen, however, she was met by the most endearing view she could have ever been met with and it rendered her speechless.

Her large snow orc was standing before her with a blush on his cheeks and a tiny fruit basket between his giant arms.

It was full of mixed berries.

She couldn’t hide her happy surprise as she stared at the sight before her, her mouth opening and closing a few times.

“Bucky?” She finally whispered his name, breaking the silence, her voice soft and laced with love.

Damn, that orc could steal hearts.

“I—  uhh—  borrowed the basket from Sarah,” Bucky muttered, pushing the basket forward for her to take as he avoided eye contact.

He really sucked at this and he knew it, but he was trying. He desperately wanted to make everything better. He knew he couldn’t take the yelling or the bruising back, but he badly needed to fix what he had so stupidly ruined, and the berries were his best bet.

She appreciatively took the basket out of his hand, hugging it to her chest.

“I’m sorry if they’re not as good as the ones you picked. It’s— it’s my first time uhm— picking berries,” Bucky admitted lowly, gesturing with his hands as his eyes wandered anywhere but on her, afraid of meeting her eyes and finding them disappointed or fearful still.

It was true. It was his first time doing any of this. Bucky was a rough orc. He did hunting, not foraging.

“They’re perfect,” she replied without even looking at the fruits, the gesture itself enough for her as she realized that under all this beef, her orc had hid a heart of gold and a softness to die for.

Bucky only nodded awkwardly, still unable to meet her eyes. He didn’t know how to act or what to say.

He was a soldier. He used to give orders and expect results, he didn’t do apologies or pluck raspberries as gently as possible in order not to squish them between his huge fingers.

She silently took the basket to the kitchen, a smile covering her face as her heart jumped.

Bucky walked in after her, leaning on the door frame and watching as she emptied the berries in a bowl and washed them.

For a moment, neither of them spoke, the weight of their earlier argument hanging heavy in the air.

“How’s your arm?” Bucky asked softly, swallowing in the fear of having left some serious damage on her.

Her smile faltered for a second when she remembered the way he had so harshly grabbed and held her, “it’s gonna be okay. Just a tiny bruise.” She reassured still, not wanting him to feel bad anymore.

Bucky’s fingers trembled as he ran a rough hand through his unkempt hair, the weight of his actions weighing heavily on his conscience.

“I hurt you,” he said, his voice thick with remorse. “I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. I really am sorry, little human.” Bucky sincerely apologized again.

Before she could reply, he stepped closer, taking hold of her hand before lowering his lips to her forearm.

The feeling of Bucky’s tusks ever so softly digging into her skin as Bucky left tender kisses all over the abused area made her shiver.

“I’m sorry; I’m a fool,” Bucky said into her skin as he pressed another kiss, “I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry.” He pressed one final kiss before letting her arm go, “I will never doubt you again, sweet thing. Please forgive me.”

He stood there with the bluest puppy eyes, silently begging for her clemency as his hands hugged hers.

“I forgive you, Bucky.” She nodded with a shy smile, her own guilt gnawing at her insides as the fire that had rose on her skin in the wake of Bucky’s lips dissipated.

“It scared me when I came home and didn’t find you. I— I thought you were leaving me again.” He confessed lowly, “I didn’t know what to think.”

“I know. I should’ve at least left a note,” she thought out loud, her head down in regret, “I thought I would be home before you arrived so I didn’t feel the need to write one. I’m sorry, Bucky.” She gave his hand a desperate squeeze, “I really didn’t mean to scare you or make you feel like I was running away.”

“It’s okay.” Bucky smiled softly, regretting how poorly he had reacted as he brought her hand to his lips.

She was amazing. His night’s firefly.

“I don’t think of you as someone who doesn’t have feelings, Bucky,” she blurted out, her voice quivering with sincerity. “The kindness you show me... it's unlike anything I've ever known from humans. It's genuine, and real, and it's the reason I wanna be with you.”

Bucky listened in silence, an appreciative smile breaking on his handsome face.

“I care about you, Bucky, and I respect your feelings more than you know. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I didn’t.”

“I didn’t want to keep you when you didn’t want to stay, but it still hurt every time you left,” Bucky finally voiced his thoughts, sharing a part of his feelings and fears with her.

“Who—” She stopped to clear her throat, “who said I don’t wanna stay?”

“So you wanna be here for good? With me?” Bucky’s eyes lit up with hope as he intently watched her.

“Well, I made a cake, didn’t I?” She wouldn’t let her eyes meet his as she placed the berries on top of the smooth cake, her heart drumming in her chest.

“Let me hear it, sweet thing,” Bucky begged, unable to believe what he was hearing from her despite everything that has happened.

“I thought I’ve said it before,” she tried to tease, “and I’m wearing your ring, Bucky,” she chuckled shyly, her face hot.

Bucky kept waiting, wordlessly pleading her to tell him the words he so badly needed to hear.

She looked at him and saw passion drawn all over his face and she could only imagine she looked the same.

“I… wanna be here… with you, Bucky, for good,” she said before biting her lip, her own admittance sending a shudder down the back of her hot neck.

The simple sentence hit Bucky like a warm cup of cocoa on a stormy evening as he smiled.

He grabbed her hand and gave the palm of it a long kiss, getting berry residue on his cheek.

Thankfully, she didn’t take her hand away, giggling softly as her orc got his skin stained.

She smiled timidly when he pulled away, wiping his cheek clean with her other thumb.

“I know I haven’t made it easy for you, Bucky, but you’ve got to trust me. I don’t wanna leave you, not now, not ever.”

Bucky nodded, his heart soaring at the reassurance, “I trust you, little human.”

“Let’s eat our cake?” She asked, biting her lip.

Our. It was the first time she has ever used that word.

Bucky nodded with a grateful smile of his own, carefully carrying the cake out to the table outside.

She grabbed plates, forks and a knife and followed him.

Her heart was beating like crazy, yet it was the most relieved it had ever been now that they have made up.

She handed Bucky the knife and he cut through the cake.

She took the chance that he was busy and leaned forward to kiss his cheek, her lips lingering against his warm skin for a fleeting moment, “welcome home”.

Bucky could feel his chest burning up with the love it held for her.

For years, he had believed himself unworthy of love, of kindness, of anything resembling happiness. But in that short second with her lips on his cheek, he felt a twinkle of hope ignite within him, dispersing the darkness that had cloaked his heart for years.

The commotion that happened earlier had made him forget all about his kiss, but she didn’t.

She kissed him and with a smile too.

Bucky was love-sick, her gentle features stirring unparalleled emotions inside of him, softening his rough edges without even trying.

With a hesitant hand, he reached out to cup her cheek, his thumb brushing against the smooth skin in a silent promise of devotion. And as she leaned into his touch, cupping his hand with her tiny one, Bucky took an oath to cherish her, to protect her, and to love her with every fiber of his being for as long as he lived.

“Is there anyone around left from your tribe that I can meet?” She asked after Bucky had filled their plates with cake, interested to know more about her husband’s life as she handed him his fork.

She couldn’t help her curiosity anymore. She cared about Bucky and she needed to know why he was out here on his own. Where was his clan? Did he even have one? Do they know about her?

“No, just the two very close human friends,” Bucky sighed his answer before slipping a raspberry in his mouth, his thoughts running to his clan; the clan that had rejected and abandoned him years ago.

Okay, but where were the orcs? Now she was more curious and confused.

“What about your family?”

“You’re my family,” Bucky answered without hesitancy and she felt her heart flood with love as she speechlessly stared at his face.

“Where did you see me?” She wondered aloud, her tone hushed as she ached to know how and when he got to choose her.

“At the orphanage,” he started, a smile already spreading on his face as he recalled the memory, “me and Sam were delivering chairs and a few beds for the new rooms they had built.”

She listened, knowing exactly what he was talking about. She was part of the group that was instructed to clean the new building.

“I had just taken a bed down from the truck when I felt something drop on my head and before I knew it, it was raining. I was wiping the raindrops off my forehead.” Bucky’s fork played around with the berries on his plate before he looked up and into her eyes, “and I let my arm down and there you were, breathtaking as a daydream, laughing with another girl as you both ran inside before the rain could catch you.”

“How did I not see you?” She whispered, eyes welling up at the adoration she could see in his gaze.

“You were too busy being scared of the rain,” Bucky teased, “but I saw you.” Bucky’s thumb stroke drown her cheek, “I saw you and I knew I just had to see you again.”

“So that was when you asked the manager if I could be your wife?” She bit her lip, the thought now flattering to her rather than appalling as it used to be.

“No, that was when I intentionally slammed a chair down on the concrete and broke it to pieces so we could be one chair short and I could come again and hopefully sneak another peek at you.” Bucky laughed, remembering Sam’s reaction as he watched the chair he had so carefully put together get smashed down, “Sam wasn’t so happy about me destroying his work”.

“Oh my gods,” she laughed with him, feeling bad for poor Sam.

“Yeah, he didn’t believe me when I said I dropped it, swore he wasn’t coming with me that next time and everything. It was a whole thing.” Bucky shook his head as his laughter faded into a soft smile.

“Can’t blame him.” She shrugged with a grin.

“He was fine.” Bucky waved his hand in the air, “I honestly only cared that I’d secured myself a chance to come back.” He admitted unapologetically.

“And did you see me when you came back?” She asked, her elbow on the table and her cheek resting on her hand, cake long forgotten.

“Yeah, I had to sneak to the back to see you, but I did. You were even more beautiful that day,” Bucky told her, making her blush under his affectionate gaze, “you had a messy flower crown on top of your head and you were taking laundry down from the clothesline. You were so focused as you tried to pull the clothes down without getting on your tiptoes,” he chuckled, recalling how cute she was as she struggled to reach the peg clips.

“Hey! They hung that clothesline way too high! No one could reach it!” She shook her head.

“Yeah, I’m sure they couldn’t,” Bucky teased, laughing at her defensive reply.

“They couldn’t, I swear! Not just me!”

“I believe you,” Bucky said with a provocative smile.

“You’re annoying.” She pouted, digging her fork in her cake slice.

“Nah, you’re just too little, little human.” Bucky teased again and she couldn’t help her smile.

It was all making sense now as she admired his gorgeous grin: the yearning for Bucky’s touch when he wasn’t there, the longing for his presence that had replaced her previous fear or repulsion, and the way she so desperately looked forward to the weekends so they could hold hands as they walked and talked could only mean one thing.

She was in love. She was in love with Bucky and she didn’t want to run from that feeling.

“I— I think I’m in love with you,” she admitted in a tiny whisper.

A smile lit Bucky’s face up before he gave her forehead a long kiss, trying to convey his adoration for her as he held her close to him, “I know I’m in love with you, little human.” He sighed in her hair.

He couldn’t believe she said it and he couldn’t believe she said it first. He couldn’t believe how far they have come and how beautiful life could be.

But he knew now and he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Bucky finally had someone who loved him and cared about him; someone he could trust and surrender his heart to.

She stood on her tiptoes, making him chuckle as she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him so close that he could feel her heartbeat.

“They renounced me a long time ago,” Bucky whispered in her hair, feeling brave enough to open up to her about his past.

Her heart sank at the gut-wrenching piece of information.

“What?” She pulled away in shock, “why?”

Her mind couldn’t wrap itself around the idea of a clan having Bucky and willingly letting him go.

“My mother was a human; wanted to name me James, but she died during my birth, heart condition,” he started, closing his eyes to stop his tears from forming, “they eventually did name me James, but I think I never liked it. My grandma gave me the name Bucky, from my middle name ‘Buchanan’. She was the one who raised me because me and my father weren’t close. He could never forgive me for taking my mother away from him, I guess.” Bucky shrugged, swallowing his emotions.

She listened silently, her own tears brimming. What kind of father does that? Bucky had already lost his mother and instead of being there for him, his father made him lose him too?!

“Before I knew it, I’m a teenager and my father had passed away and my grandma before him… I had no one left and my cousins weren’t about to let the half-orc with the human mother become chief.” Bucky sighed as he recalled the events of his youth.

She stayed in his arms, hands on his chest as she listened closely, her heart breaking at the expression on her orc’s face.

“And when I started ‘working with the humans’, they found the perfect reason to kick me out of the clan for good.” He finished with a sad smile, shaking his head as if to shake the memories away.

“That was when you started fighting for the kingdom?” She asked, softly running the back of her fingers down Bucky’s cheek as a tear rolled down her own.

“Had nowhere else to go.” Bucky shrugged with a teary smile, trying to pull himself together.

“But that was where you met Sam, right?” She reminded with a tender smile, her thumb tracing his stubbly chin.

Bucky nodded with a chuckle, “yeah, used to drive me crazy at first, but he was a good soldier; an even better friend.”

“And then you opened your shop.” She tilted her head, her fingers catching the tips of Bucky’s soft hair by his shoulder.

“Yeah.” He closed his eyes, reminiscing at how things have turned out.

“And you started making beautiful furniture that you needed to deliver to the orphanage, where you saw me.” She grinned fondly, a fingertip tracing the orc’s nose.

“Yes.” Bucky sighed, his love pouring out of his dewy eyes as he enjoyed the light touches.

“And now I’m here with you, in our home,” she brought both palms to Bucky’s cheeks, “and I will never leave you, Bucky,” she told him seriously before getting on her tiptoes to hug him again, “I’m your family and you’re mine.” She whispered into his neck.

“I love you,” Bucky whispered into her shoulder, his arm squeezing her to him as if he wanted to meld himself to her.

“Copycat,” she joked, instantly feeling her orcs chest vibrate with a chuckle, “I love you too, Bucky.”

With her in his arms, hers wrapped around him as tight as she could, Bucky could then understand the meaning of safety, of love and family.

And she finally came to realize that she and Bucky weren’t all that different after all. They had both been abandoned by the ones who were supposed to have their backs before and more than anyone. But they have got each other now. She wasn’t going to let Bucky go and she trusted him not to let her go either.

~

As she leaned in to give Bucky his goodnight kiss that night, a different thought occupied her mind.

Sitting up against the pillows, she crossed her legs, her heart pounding with anticipation as Bucky looked at her with a quizzical tilt of his head.

She slowly got closer to his face, locking eyes with him to gain more courage, but it only made her more nervous.

She took a deep breath and when she pressed her lips, she pressed them to her orc’s mouth instead of his cheek, ever so tentatively getting a much needed taste of his full lips. They were so soft, so perfect.

She had no idea if she was doing this right, but she didn’t care.

Bucky's eyes widened in disbelief, wondering if he was dreaming.

She pulled away after a short second, scared that she might have crossed a line, “I’m sorry. Do orcs not do that—”

Before she could apologize or question her actions further, Bucky silenced her with a kiss of his own, swiftly bringing her down to lay on her back as he hovered over her, his kisses eager and desperate as he tried his best to watch his tusks.

“I don’t care what orcs do. We’re doing it,” he mumbled against her sweet lips.

Bucky allowed her one loud laugh before devouring her lips again, stealing her heart and breath with another tender, yet deep kiss.

In that very moment, time seemed to stand still for Bucky. All he could feel was the warmth of her cheek against his palm, all he could taste was the sweetness of her lips mingled with the faint flavor of berries, and he never wanted it to end.

As she allowed his tongue to gently explore her mouth, a promise of eternity passed between them in a moan, sealing their bond with a promise of a lifetime of love and devotion.

She has never had a real friendship. Rarely had anything to say. She would rather stay silent if she thought she didn’t have anything to contribute to the conversation. She was always afraid that others might find her boring, and was even more afraid that that may be her truth. So she always hid. She hid from others, from herself and her feelings. She hid from problems and fights. She hid from anything that could get her hurt.

But with Bucky it was different.

She didn’t have to hide anymore, didn’t have to be scared because in Bucky she had everything. She had a true friend, a loyal lover and a great husband.

And as she let herself drown in the feeling of his lips, she couldn’t be more grateful for the gods above for drawing her fate exactly how it was.

It felt so good to belong to Bucky and she could all but want more.

She let her instincts run wild, her body hot with need as she hesitantly slipped her hands under Bucky’s sweater, eager to feel his scarred skin under her fingers.

Bucky pulled away from her lips to look her in the eyes, his breath stuttering at her tender touch, “what are you doing, sweet thing?”

“I’m sorry. Was that too far?” She hurriedly tried to pull her hands out of his clothes, but Bucky was faster as he sat back and held his hands on top of hers, keeping them inside his sweater, right on his ribs.

“I’m your husband,” Bucky reminded with a sweet smile.

“I know— I just— I’ve never—” She struggled with her words as heat rose to her face, “I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable… but I think I wanna do this.” She confessed shyly, her indexes caressing up and down his abdomen.

“This this?” Bucky tilted his head suggestively, already feeling his cock jump at the thought alone.

“This this.” She smiled, biting her lip shyly as she gave a nod.

“Little human, you better not be playing right now.” Bucky warned, his eyes growing the slightest bit darker.

“I’m not—”

“Because if I start, I won’t be able to stop myself, sweet thing.”

“Then don’t.”

Her newfound courage took over as she brought Bucky back to her with her hands tangled in his pullover.

Bucky kissed her with fervor, savoring the angelic sounds she was making as his tongue tasted hers.

He carefully ran a large hand up her hip, exploring as his lips trailed down her cheek and to her neck.

He could feel her pulse again and was about to stop, déjà vu from their wedding night attacking him, but then she said his name in the softest, sexiest and neediest tone as she squirmed underneath him, his covered cock fitting just right between her legs.

Bucky could all but put his lips back on her, his tusks grazing the sensitive skin as he nibbled on it.

“Can I see you?” He breathed, his eyes on hers as his fingers found way under the skirt of her dress.

She nodded, her face and neck flushed as she sat up and gave the orc her back.

Bucky wasted no time working the zipper down, revealing the back of her bralette to his hungry eyes.

She twisted herself back, seeking Bucky’s blue orbs for reassurance as she pushed her dress down her shoulders. Her heart pounded in her chest when she saw Bucky literally lick his lips at the sight of her.

It felt like it was the first time Bucky was seeing her naked to both of them.

He saw her hesitate with pushing the dress down further and so with a smile, Bucky pulled his own pullover up and off his head, “I got you.” He promised.

She bit her lower lip, pushing the dress down her thighs.

Bucky pulled the piece of clothing all the way down, throwing it behind his back with his discarded sweater. He kept his calloused palms on her shins, caressing the smooth skin while he watched her hands go behind her back to unhook her bralette.

She let it fall from her body, her chest rising and falling with her heavy breaths as she watched Bucky’s gaze switch from admiration to sheer desire.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, gently bringing her on her back, taking the bralette all the way down her arms as he pressed his mouth to hers again.

Bucky’s lips traced down the hot skin of her throat in open-mouthed kisses, moving to her collarbones, “can I touch you, sweet thing?”

“Yes.” She nodded and goosebumps instantly rose on her skin as Bucky’s palms cupped her breasts, his thumbs brushing her hardening nipples.

“Bucky,” she moaned, her back involuntarily curving as she pushed herself further into her orc’s touch.

“Oh, you sensitive on here, little human?” Bucky asked, biting back his smirk as his calloused flesh thumb rubbed over her nipple again, “’s my touch making your little nipples hard?”

“Bucky,” she whined at the dirty talk, her hands coming up to cover her hot face in embarrassment.

“Hey.” Bucky gently took her hands away from her face, “don’t hide from me, sweet thing. I love that your body is reacting to me.”

Before she could whine again, her husband was bringing her right hand down and between his legs, pressing her open palm to his hard cock, “this is my body reacting to you, my love.”

She gasped, the feeling foreign to her as she felt how big and hard Bucky was.

“This is what you do to me, little human.” Bucky wrapped her smaller hand around his clothed cock, giving himself a squeeze, making wetness pool in her panties at the sound that left him afterwards.

Knowing that she wasn’t the only one whose body was on fire, made her the tiniest bit more confident and she found herself giving Bucky’s cock another squeeze, making his head drop to her shoulder.

“Oh, fuck, you tryna kill me, sweet thing?” Bucky breathed a chuckle on her neck.

“Did— did I hurt you?” She asked insecurely, wanting to remove her hand and bury herself under the bed.

“Gods, you’re an angel.” Bucky shook his head and she didn’t understand until he said, “you have no idea how much your touch drives me mad, do you?”

She shook her head innocently and Bucky only smiled, moving his mouth to her chest, his tusks softly grazing everywhere his lips went.

“It’s something like this.”

“Ohhhh, Bucky!” She arched her back again as her orc wrapped one of her nipples in his lips, softly suckling at the tender nub, making her hand give a tighter pump to his cock.

She really was sensitive there.

Bucky groaned, moving to her other nipple, the vibration driving her crazy, making her squirm harder as her hand massaged around his cock, sliding up his back to unconsciously wrap in his long hair as she pushed her breast into his mouth.

She could feel herself clenching like crazy down there, her whole body aflame with lust from all the new sensations Bucky was introducing her to.

The way the tip of his tongue flicked against her nipples made her crave more.

Bucky’s kisses trailed down her ribs to her abdomen, worshipping every inch until they settled on top of her pubic bone, dark blue eyes looking up at her for permission to go further.

She nodded, aching for her orc’s touch to provide any kind of relief.

A little nervous about not finding her wet once again, Bucky moved closer to her center.

Bucky let his lips kiss her on top of her underwear first, inhaling the saturated fabric as he pressed a long kiss to her clothed core. He swallowed hard, her scent filling his nostrils and making him dizzy with desire.

She smelled so good.

“Bucky, please,” she pleaded before she could stop herself, desperate for him to do anything to help the throbbing between her legs.

“I got you, sweet thing,” Bucky told her again, quickly pushing the tiny underwear down her legs and getting himself comfortable between her legs.

He took a second to look at her, all naked and all his, writhing from and for his touch and his touch alone.

“Wh— what are you gonna do?” She asked uncertainly, not really getting why Bucky was bringing himself lower between her open thighs, eye to eye with her pussy, the position making her cheeks burn up.

“I’m gonna get a taste, little human. Would you let me? Can I get a taste of you, sweet thing?” Bucky asked as he pressed loving kisses to the delicate flesh of her inner thigh.

“You’re… gonna put your mouth there?” She whispered her question shyly, the thought making her want to close her legs and hide.

Bucky just smiled lovingly at her innocence; his untouched, pure little human, “if you let me.”

“Is it gonna feel good?” She asked curiously.

Bucky nodded, relieved she wasn’t scared of his tusks coming close to where she was the most sensitive, “I’ll make sure of it.”

“Y—yes. Okay.” She nodded, swallowing her nervousness as she laid her head back.

Bucky knew what he was doing and she trusted him to take care of her.

Her permission was all Bucky needed to put his mouth on her, pressing a longing kiss to her lower lips, glad to find her soaking wet, making her gasp above him. The feeling of his blunt tusks framing her pussy set her heart racing.

He then locked eyes with her as he let his tongue out, licking a slow, deliberate stripe up from her dripping hole to her pulsing clit before wrapping his full lips around it and she couldn’t help the tiny squeal that escaped her as her head fell back on the pillow, her hips pushing down against him

Bucky smirked on her heat before moaning himself. She tasted so good, better than anything he has ever put his mouth on.

He had fucked humans before and he knew exactly what to do, but she was different. Every breath she released, every moan, was making Bucky wild with desire. He has never cared about making someone feel good as he did in that moment with her thighs around his head.

Her delicate hands flew to her orc’s hair and she tugged hard, losing herself in the feeling of Bucky’s mouth on her pussy as she arched her back and pushed herself closer to his lips. Her orc’s touch was reducing her to a moaning, babbling mess in mere seconds.

Bucky decided to test the waters a little, slipping his tongue inside her hole a few times, tasting her sweetness from the source before bringing his flesh finger between her legs. He gently prodded the tip of his thick finger at her entrance, feeling her tense above him with a gasp.

“It’s okay, sweet thing, I got you. Just relax for me.” He reassured and she tried her best to relax her muscles, allowing Bucky to ease the tip of his finger insider of her.

Fuck, she was so tight; the tightest he has ever felt and it made him rut into the mattress when he thought about how tight she was going to feel around his cock.

Her mouth hung open as Bucky worked the thick digit into her pussy knuckle by knuckle, his lips sucking on her clit.

“I gotta open you up for my cock, little human.” Bucky couldn’t help but tease her, smirking when she whined, getting wetter on his finger.

Bucky started moving his finger in and out of her, his movements slow and deep as he tried to explore as much of her as his finger would go.

Her body was feverish with arousal and her mind was drunk on the feeling of being filled for the first time in her life as sighs and whimpers slipped from her lips without her permission.

It was just one finger pushing in and out of her cunt and she was feeling full already, clenching hard with her juices drenching her thighs and the sheets. She clenched harder around Bucky’s thick finger at the thought of how big his cock would feel and how full it would make her feel, the way he was suckling on her clit making a knot tighten in her lower stomach.

She has never felt anything like this before and was starting to panic at the sensation spreading from her pussy to the rest of her.

“Bucky, I— I feel weird,” she whined, yet ground harder on her orc’s thick finger.

“Are you in pain, little human?” Bucky asked worriedly, taking his touch and mouth away from her at once.

“No, no, no, why would you stop?” She whined louder, her glossy eyes opening and pleading him to give her her pleasure back.

“Oh.” Bucky smirked when he looked from her eyes to her pussy and saw her clamp around nothing, “oh, sweet thing, you were gonna cum?” He asked lowly, his index rubbing up and down her sopping hole without going in.

“I— I don’t know.” She writhed, her hips pushing down as she tried to take Bucky’s finger back inside her, “Bucky, please.” She begged despite not really knowing what she was begging for.

But Bucky knew. He knew and he was going to give it to her.

“I got you,” Bucky said as he pushed his finger back into her pussy with ease, “you think you can take another one, little human?”

“Yes.” She nodded, her answer breathy and desperate as she automatically opened her thighs wider.

“Gods, you’re perfect. So good for me, sweet thing.” Bucky took his index out before coupling it with his middle and pushing both fingers into her, stretching her once more.

She whimpered at the careful intrusion, her hand bringing Bucky’s face to her pulsing clit, making him smirk proudly at how needy she was being for him.

If she thought she felt full before, this made her realize she was wrong.

Bucky’s fingers were so thick, so skilled as they massaged and curled against her upper walls, making her squeal when they nudged a specific spot deep inside her.

“Oh, there you go,” Bucky groaned into her clit, knowing exactly what he was doing to her as he kept curling his fingers inside of her, harshly stimulating the spot that was making her thrash.

He could feel her walls contracting harder around his fingers and he wanted to watch as he brought her to her first orgasm ever.

Keeping his eyes on her blissed out face, Bucky replaced his mouth with the heel of his left hand, circling her clit tightly with his cooler palm.

She wailed at the new stimulation, the pressure from Bucky’s hand strong enough to rub both her clit and her lower abdomen.

Her loud whimpers were making Bucky’s cock leak in his pants as her fingers dug into his shoulders.

“I got you, sweet thing. Give it to me, my love. Shake on your orc’s fingers.”

Bucky’s words did it for her.

She felt the knot in her tummy tighten once more and before she could tell him about it this time, her toes were curling and her body was trembling as her pussy clenched and pulsated around the orc’s beefy digits.

Bucky watched with an open mouth, his lips shimmering with the remnants of her arousal as he almost finished in his pants like a teenager at the mere sight of her losing it on his fingers, “there you go, my love. Good job, sweet thing.”

He slowed down the curling of his fingers but kept his palm circling her clit, wanting to keep her convulsing for as long as he could before she gently tried pushing his touch off.

“Sensitive,” she panted and Bucky decided to have mercy on her.

She laid down on the bed, her tired body limp despite the ongoing throbbing of her pussy, trying to catch her breath.

A smile automatically formed on her lips as she felt Bucky climb up the bed again, mapping his way up her body in wet kisses.

“Hi,” she whispered, opening her eyes when she felt him kissing the corner of her lips.

“Hi.” Bucky smiled, more than satisfied with himself at the state he had managed to bring her to as he kissed her lips, making her taste herself on his tongue, “did you like that, sweet thing?”

She nodded coyly, “can I… make you feel like that too? With my mouth?” Her face was flushed, heat spreading on her skin as if she hadn’t just come on Bucky’s fingers.

The orc could barely hold his orgasm back at the innocence in her voice as she asked if she could suck his cock in the purest way possible. He wasn’t about to cum untouched during his first time with his human. Get it together dammit.

“Later, sweet thing. Right now, I need to be inside your pussy or I think I might die.”

“Bucky,” she whined shyly, covering her face with her hands.

He laughed at her bashfulness before removing the rest of his clothes, “look at me, little human.” Bucky urged gently, his touch soft as his thumb stroked her lower belly.

She removed her hands, eyes instantly landing on his huge cock as it stood proudly, leaking pearls of pre-cum down his length.

“Are you ready, little human?” Bucky asked, wanting to make sure she wanted this.

She remained wordless for a second, taking in Bucky’s cock with an open mouth, wondering if it was going to fit.

“You can say no, sweet thing. We don’t have to do it tonigh—”

“Yes,” she interrupted with a nod, “make me yours, Bucky.”

Bucky bit his lip, stifling a groan, trying to stop himself from sliding home and pounding her into the mattress.

“I thought you were already mine, little human.” He growled lowly, rubbing the tip of his cock up and down her soaking cunt, tapping her clit teasingly just to see her shiver.

“I am. But I wanna be yours like this too.” She mumbled, her eyes mesmerized as she watched Bucky lube his cock up in her wetness, “wanna be yours in every way possible.”

“Can’t say no to that,” Bucky growled before carefully popping the tip of his fat cock inside her aching pussy.

Her breaths were coming out in short pants, cunt already clenching around him and he almost doubled over, his knees weak as pleasure engulfed his senses, “fuck, sweet thing, you’re so tight. Pussy’s tryna kill me.” He moaned, unintentionally making her clench down harder.

She looked like she had already been fucked stupid when Bucky proceeded to push half of his fat cock inside her, letting out tiny mewls and whines as she felt every ridge and vein on her orc’s cock, holding onto his arms for dear life.

“Oh, you feel so good, my love. So wet for me,” Bucky sighed as he kept fucking her with half of his cock, wanting her to get used to the stretch before he could give her all of him, “so tight”.

“Please, Bucky,” she moaned, her heart and pussy simultaneously fluttering at Bucky calling her his love yet again, “I can take it.” She promised, opening her thighs as far as they would go for him.

Bucky could all but snarl hungrily as he leaned forward, burying his face in her soft neck before gradually pushing the rest of his cock inside her tight throbbing cunt inch by inch until he had bottomed out.

He took a second to calm himself down, not wanting to burst so fast. Then he was pulling out just enough for his bulbous tip alone to remain inside of her before sliding back into her cunt, gasping into her neck at the sensation of being totally wrapped up in her snug warmth.

She couldn’t help but cry out at the pleasure as he orc fucked her deeply, reaching places inside of her she never knew existed.

She thought it would take longer for her body to get used to Bucky’s girth, but it was like she was made for him, her pussy effortlessly accepting him every time he pressed back home.

The tip of Bucky���s cock easily found her special spot, ramming into it over and over every time he drove himself back into her heat.

“Oh, Bucky!” She squealed, her back already bowing once more as her vision got blurrier and Bucky knew he wasn’t going to last much longer when her nails dug into his skin again.

His breath was labored when he raised his head, wanting a taste of her lips as his thrusts became faster, more desperate. He swallowed her loud moans, leaving the only sound in the empty cottage to be the sound of skin slapping against skin as he fucked her faster.

“Bucky, it’s gonna happen again,” she whined and Bucky brought his hand down to her clit at once, wanting to see and feel her crumble on his cock.

“Yeah? You gonna cum on my fat cock, little human?”

She nodded frantically, her legs wrapping around Bucky’s waist.

“Cum for me, sweet thing. Let me feel your tight little pussy cum on my cock.”

Bucky’s dirty whispers in her ear, his deep thrusts and his frantic rubbing on her sensitive clit were making her lose control; making her lightheaded with desire as she let herself go again, full body tensing before shaking in her orc’s arms.

Bucky could no longer hold back, his guttural growl making her clench hard. He gave a few more thrusts before pushing his cock as deep as it would go inside her quivering pussy, keeping his assault on her clit going to keep her clenching around him. He felt his cock twitch as he emptied his balls inside her. His cock wouldn’t stop throbbing as he filled his little human up with his hot cum.

Before any of them could comprehend it, she was cumming again just at the feeling of Bucky cumming inside of her, making him groan as her walls squeezed his cock, milking him for all that he was worth.

He let himself collapse on top of her for just a minute before feeling the need to pull out because she wouldn’t stop pulsating and shuddering around his sensitive cock.

Bucky didn’t think he had ever cum so hard in his entire life.

A smile spread on his lips as he flipped on his side, watching her chest rise and fall with her slowing breaths.

He trailed a finger up her still slightly trembling thigh, making her open her tired eyes to look at him.

She gave him a sweet smile, biting her lip as she squirmed, timidly closing her thighs and Bucky could see the exact moment she realized that his cum was leaking out of her abused hole, smirking at how bashful she got straightaway.

“Are you okay, little human?” Bucky asked, his finger tracing up her abdomen, around the curve of her breast and up under her chin, keeping her gaze on his.

She nodded, her expression cock-drunk despite the shyness, “when— when can we do that again?”

Her question pulled an astonished laugh out of Bucky as he wrapped a hair strand around his finger, “any time you want, my love.” He brought her forehead to his lips, kissing her adoringly.

Gods, he was so in love that his heart felt like it would burst.

She smiled bigger, satisfied with the answer as she moved closer, settling on her orc’s broad chest and snuggling close to his warmth, “I love you, Bucky.”

“I love you, sweet thing.” Bucky gave her lips a deep kiss.

“So orcs do do that.” She mumbled with a sleepy smile against his lips, making him laugh into her mouth.

She giggled a little before pushing her nose further into Bucky’s neck, gracefully falling asleep to his scent.

As she laid in his arms, vulnerable and exposed, Bucky felt a surge of protectiveness wash over him as he pulled the heavy blanket up her naked form, holding her closer to him.

He pressed a gentle kiss to her hairline, vowing to always be there for her. She was his, and he was hers, destined together through a love that defied all odds.

And as they drifted off to sleep in each other's arms, Bucky knew that he had found his home, his safe haven, in the embrace of this one girl who had so easily stolen his heart.

Part VI

~

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[kithtaehyung]

drabble: first one pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f) rating/genre: pg ; fluff ; three tangerines au note: uhh. surprise and happy holidays LOL. based on this ig reel sent in the discord multiple times, this little slice is gonna kickstart the "3tan does sm" mini series! basically this little ongoing collection will have all the drabbles/requests based on social media things y'all send in. if it inspires me, i'll make a drabble or something out of it hehehe. enjoy! warnings: nothing big. just 3tan yoongi lol links: three tangerines mlist ; masterlist drop date: december 28, 2023, 7:07pm est word count: 1.1k

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In the middle of winter, you decide that tonight is the perfect time to try something new. 

Which leaves Yoongi confused as hell because this attempt requires him to be outside in the freeze, when the two of you were just bundled up in blankets and watching a movie minutes ago. 

But he can scold your lack of attention span and tendency to watch videos during long movies later. 

“What am I doing?” 

Placing him on one spot of the sidewalk just outside his apartment, you urge, “Just, hold on. Stay right there.” 

“Huh?” 

Giggling, you give no other instructions, instead rushing forward to bring your phone to a nearby bench. When you set it down to see what the camera catches, you determine that you look fine enough, so you tell Yoongi—who is simply standing there and still looking devastatingly handsome—what you wanna do. “Okay, pull up the video I sent you.” 

“Shouldn’t we go back inside?” 

“Yes, yes, after this.” 

When you walk up, he pulls up the link, and you both watch as people run to their partners and rush them out of frame, spinning them around or chasing them away. 

Ever consistent, Yoongi is both unfazed and wondering what goes on. “What’s the goal of this again?” 

Shrugging, you’re just happy he’s not tugging you back indoors yet. “I don’t really know, but. I just wanna see how you do it.” 

“Mm…” He looks one more time, cementing his answer with the way he smushes his lips. “Fine.” 

“You’ll do it?” 

“Uh huh. But this is just for you.” 

Right. Because of course this can't be seen anywhere else. Your smile is rueful with a tinge of holiday hope, “I know.” 

And Yoongi’s expression carries the same weight. 

Maybe one day this conversation will be a lot different. Just like the way your quick stay at his place while your brother is at a work dinner will prove a lot longer of a night. One day. 

Maybe.

Cheering yourself up, you practically bounce back to where the bench is, slipping a bit with a tiny “whoops” before reaching out to press record. Backing up onto the sidewalk, you throw up peace signs, poses, do a few different filler moves until Yoongi does his part. 

But nothing happens. 

And no one appears by your side. 

So you turn to see if he actually left but goddamn it is he recording you? “What the!” 

Yoongi just laughs as you kick your head back in laughter, and stops holding his phone up. “So cute.” 

Damn it, he can’t give you this fluttering feeling while being annoying! “Focus!” 

Groaning, you turn your recording off and then back on again, repeating some of the same things for the camera and shuffling a little in place to warm up. Because it is freezing and this idea could have waited another season or two. 

And when you look to the side after a pause, Yoongi is recording again. 

You bend forward to shield from the chill, your yell echoing throughout the small little courtyard, “Yoongi!” Does he have to keep grinning like that? There’s no time for prolonging this even more! “I cannot with you right now.” 

After another attractive huff of amusement, he keeps going, “I can’t help it! You’re being adorable.” 

Well. At least Yoongi’s having his fun. If anything, he’s stalling because he doesn’t wanna do whatever challenge this is. So you can drop it. “Ugh… Never mind, we can go inside.” 

After grabbing your phone, you walk up to him again before he stops you. And you think it’s because you were about to slip once more, but his low tone gets you to see his face under those locks. 

“Nah, we can do it.” When you give him a pouting frown, his teeth shine. “Serious!” 

Easily placated, you’re back to grinning. “Okay, for real this time! It’s cold!” 

“I know! You didn’t even let me get my beanie!” 

Laughing out your guilt, you warn him over your shoulder, “If you run into me, you better not knock me over.” 

“I won’t, doll.” 

“Okay!” Placing your phone down for hopefully the last time, you hit record, seeing yourself sigh before gingerly walking back to the sidewalk. 

In hindsight, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to try and get Yoongi to do this. It’s colder than hell’s deepest frost at this point, and some snow is still falling from darkened skies. 

But all the little reactions in the videos looked too cute, and you are genuinely curious to see what he’s gonna do. So even through your poses, you brace yourself. Is he gonna run in for a hug? Is he gonna rush you off with a big warm embrace? 

…Is he really not gonna do anything?

Feeling a little bad, you drop the cute poses and turn. 

Only to feel him right at your side, gathering you with a soft, strong arm and leading you down the sidewalk. 

Well, damn.

The gesture is so him that, for a second, you genuinely think that he saw something and led you out of harm’s way on instinct. But as you look around, you don’t see anyone else in the wintry courtyard besides the two of you. 

“What’s wrong?” 

Your vision flicks away from the lighted trees dotting the area. “Oh, nothing, I was just…” 

“Wanna run it back? If we do let’s go somewhere else. It’s icy right there.” 

Blinking, you see his eyes full of pure curiosity and attentiveness. 

And suddenly you wanna go back inside for a completely different reason other than warmth. 

“That felt perfect,” you whisper, eyes lowering to his ever inviting lips. “Lemme check it.” 

Leaving his cozy side, you go back and retrieve your chilly phone, stopping the recording that you are relieved you successfully started. Both you and Yoongi watch as you play the full thing, and after he leads you out of frame, your jaw drops. 

“Oh, my god. This beats all the ones I’ve seen.” 

“Really?” 

“Damn… Now I’m actually sad I can’t post this.” When you laugh, it’s not all joyful. Turning to him, you pretend to be mad. “Why are you so cool?” 

Huffing small, Yoongi looks up and around you before giving your cheek a kiss, and your knees weaken at how tender it is. “Send it to me,” he murmurs. 

“You want it, too?” 

“Mm.” 

“Okay.” 

“Just a little longer, babe.” He gives you another peck on your very cold nose. Then both cheeks. And your forehead. 

All while you’re out in the open where anyone could witness. 

Just his willingness to amuse you was already perfect. Yoongi didn’t need to do any of that, and he certainly didn’t need to be so charming with his stylistic choice. But he did it all anyway while freezing his pretty ass off.

And his next words make your chest yearn to stay with him—for every holiday season and silly trend that comes around. 

“Then this’ll be the first one of us we post.”

-

-

fin. :)

-

🌨️ what do we feel! i needed this little drabble :')) 🌨️

a/n: did i mean for this to be a full blown drabble? no! was this the video that bo originally sent me that i flailed over? no! but it's the reel i saw and apparently had been sent in the server multiple times. so here we are with a surprise hahaha.

enjoy your holidays, everyone! and if you have anything social media related that 3tan reminds you of - or you can see the 3tan crew doing - send them in and maybe i'll get inspired again. :D this didn't take me long at all and i wanted to do it, so no worries about extra work!

a/n 2: 3tan12 is going strong alongside the holiday fics! should be posting teasers and taglists for those, too. very very excited for all of them mwahaha

🌨️ links: three tangerines mlist ; masterlist

[aestherin]

KEEP MY HEART

goal 17: kuni

There have only ever been three times you saw Scaramouche so far.

First was when you reluctantly had to watch his team's match against your brother's. He was sporting a white jersey with blue accents, representing his own university with all his glory. Though laced with tension and fatigue, his whole being still demanded attention and attraction — from you.

Second, when you met him outside your own brother's — his rival — birthday party. It was purely coincidental, how he opted to stay outside and how you were running late to the dinner. It was fate, how you both clicked despite being strangers to each other. It was all adrenaline, the reason why you accidentally gave your identity away.

And the third was today.

No more invisible strings, no more coincidences.

He was here... of his own accord.

For you.

It would've been romantic if you disregard the purpose of his visit — but still! Does he always take his friends who stay indoors to go out and see the sun? No, you don't think so.

Maybe you're a special case.

"Hey," he greeted. Scaramouche was there with his hands tucked inside his pockets, leaning against the fences surrounding your home.

'He looks so damn attractive just standing like that,' you thought.

"Hi," you smiled sheepishly.

"Let's go?"

"To where?"

"Anywhere, I guess?"

"You're the one who's taking me outside and you don't even have an itinerary?" You laughed. "How are we even going to leave?"

The man was unfazed by your bursting out. He just sighed and shook his head.

"We're commuting," Scaramouche said as if it was the most obvious thing ever. He, however, spoke again before you even had the chance to. "I have a motorbike, but I didn't want to take a risk, just in case you didn't know how to ride one."

You shrugged. "I could always learn."

Unamused, he flicked your forehead. "Stupid. Don't you ever care for yourself?"

"No need."

"What?"

"You'll do that job just fine, won't you?" You grinned at how he easily he was affected by your teasing. He wasn't flushed, no. But the way his brows furrowed, how his lips formed a thin line, and how he looked away — it was all a give-away. You have an effect on him. Somehow.

"Do you just hit on everyone you meet?"

"Oh? So you took that as me hitting on you?"

"What else would that be —" Scaramouche clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Whatever. Let's just go."

"Does your brother even know you're chatting and hanging out with me?" The boy that was sat across you uttered, having just finished sipping from his drink.

You almost choked. "Well, I would let him know if I could."

He nodded and continued sipping, but didn't bother to stop staring at you.

You looked away.

Did he really expect you would tell Kazuha about your interactions with him? If it was someone else you're crushing on, it would've been fine. You could always deal with a little teasing.

But Scaramouche? The captain of the University of Inazuma's soccer team? Rival of your brother, who was the captain of TNU's soccer team?

Kazuha would explode.

You looked back at the man.

Still staring.

"Uhh," you started off. "It's not that I'm ashamed of you or anything, it's just that..."

"Hmm?"

If the Lasso of Truth — Wonder Woman's weapon — were real, you swore you were currently binded by it. Scaramouche's expectant gaze, his slightly arched brow, and the tiny curve of his lips that he failed to hide despite his best attempt... it had the same effect on you.

It was something irresistible.

"It's just that... their image of you, in their team... let's just say, aha." You gave out an awkward chuckle. "It's not that good."

Scaramouche laughed at your words.

"Oh no, [Name]," he smirked, his tone straying away from his usual one. "Whatever would your dearest older brother do if he found out you were hanging out with a delinquent?"

"What the fuck? Scara!" You laughed.

"So? What do they say about me?"

"Rude. Arrogant. Ill-mannered."

"Ouch. But wow, that's actually fewer than I thought." He looked proud.

"Etcetera."

"Oh."

He frowned. "There's more?"

You just answered with a smile.

Your meal was filled with fun teas and hushed laughters, but it was cut short by vibrations from a phone on the table. It was Scaramouche's.

He picked the black device up, brows soon furrowing while reading the notifications he just received.

"Are you alright?" Concern grew. "What was it?"

He put his phone in his pocket. "Nothing."

You knew it had to be something.

KEEP MY HEART — scara x reader smau

previous . masterlist . next

SUMMARY — you find plenty of guys around you attractive, but there is only one you’re willing to make the first move on: the guy you first saw during your older brother’s soccer game. spoiler: he's a player from your rival university.

TAGLIST I (closed)

@kararisa @krnzysh @syriiina @unsterblich-prinz @xiaosonlybeloved @xiaomainlmao @cindywasneverhere @coquettemaiden @sunsethw4 @lunavixia @calickoh @arealistonao3 @youthingazi @zyilas @mondaymelon @yukiipc @heartswonder @st0pthatsgay @ozzierenato @astreaa-express @shewolfmiko @lovelyycherries @myaaones @countessqin @aloveablechaos @letthewindlead @lunaavity @local-blueberry-boy @luminestars @layla240 @useless-potatho @atlaszi @alatusorrow @lahsram2201 @sakiimeo @user11918163805279 @vqazx @neigesprincess @kunicrush @yoursockstinks @hotgirlshit5 @mikctp @crucnhice @apotatouwu @yuaenri @sammybeefangirls @miko1ly @deffenferofjustice @etherisy @sagegreenthinks

[t3a-tan]

Ryker's Guilt

Ryker is just a man trying to bring change, even if that means being a bad person. Here's what happened with Sammy and Tanner but from his perspective! Enjoy ^^

-----

Ryker really hadn't meant for this to happen. When he had been told that Cody's mortal child was on Earth he had expected a human. When the people he sent to retrieve her came back with three tiny people he wasn't sure how to react. This was not ideal given his plans, but when the man he hired offered to kill the two tiny children he instinctively decided to keep them.

For the first few days he wasn't sure how to go about things. Ryker knew he was not a good person— it was his burden to bear, and after doing so many heinous things for his research in the hopes that maybe he could make a breakthrough that would stop this damn war he had become numb to it.

He left the children alone, focusing on the target instead; Charlie. First things first he would need to train her so her body was in the right condition. Fighting was the first thing that came to mind… but he wasn't sure what he could make the tiny woman fight exactly.

After some research he found that there were borrower fighting events on the darker parts of the internet, and he decided to meet with one of the men behind the whole event to find out some more information.

Everything went downhill from there.

Whilst the man was inspecting the borrower woman, his guard dog suddenly jumped up and snatched her from his hands. Ryker was taken aback by the sudden attack, leaping to a stand only for it to register what was happening when small screams reached his ears. The man who had been holding Charlie simply chuckled in amusement, remarking something about his dog being hungry. Ryker sensed that it was supposed to be a joke and he felt sick.

“Drop it, boy!” The man commanded and the dog refused, growling and shaking the woman's body again. Ryker could see immediately that he could do nothing to save her in this state. She was dead. Just like that. “Sorry about that… hey uhh— how about I pay you a thousand to make up for the destruction of property and we leave it there?”

Ryker felt his anger boiling over as the incident was dismissed so easily, seething.

“If you cannot control that damned animal then don't have it out in the first place! I thought this was supposed to be professional!” He yelled, grabbing the cage that the kids were in and preparing to leave. Oh god. They saw that… they heard it. What am I doing?

“Woah. Chill out, fuck’s sake… She was older merchandise anyway, she wouldn't have been worth anything. I'd take the thousand if I were you.” He responded defensively, as if a person hadn't just died in such a cruel manner. Ryker felt an overwhelming urge to punch him in the face, but he held back, instead just shaking his head and turning to the exit.

He quickly returned back to his lab, placing the cage down and staring at it for a while, thinking.

Now that Charlie's dead, there is no longer a reason to continue. But I can't just…stop. Because of me these children are orphans. He stood up, pacing around the room as he tried to think it all over. If I stop without actually getting any results, their deaths will have been completely needless. I have to continue.

It took weeks for him to fully commit to that decision and in the meantime he was very quiet whenever he would approach the borrower children. He had bought some chocolates and cookies and other things children liked during that time, hoping it would make them just a little less afraid. And they deserved something nice to eat after what they had been put through. By me.

Sammy was incredibly feisty with him, never letting go of her younger brother. Yet, Ryker knew for a fact that he had heard her crying most nights and the unsteadiness she held herself with was developed by fear. He found her bravery fascinating considering how small she was.

On the other hand, Tanner was much more openly timid. He had a quiet demeanour but his eyes were so observant. He could see how conflicted the young boy was over the situation; happily receiving sweets only to scramble back if Ryker's hand was the thing handing it over.

He hated this. Gods he wished he had never started researching magic in the first place. He wished he had died in the bombings like the rest of his kind. But at this point he had gone too far to stop— he had caused too much suffering and all he wanted was for it to be worth something.

He hoped that Charlie's adaptation to magic had been passed down to her kids somehow and continued his work. He went to another fighting event organiser and spoke to them, this time making sure there were no dogs present. Tanner was simply too young to participate in anything like that, but Sammy was just old enough.

He signed a contract wherein he would be paid and Sammy would be handed off to the organiser every week after she was deemed ready to participate in fights.

Ryker started her off small, bringing in bugs and forcing them to fight. If he thought she was in danger of suffering permanent damage or dying he would remove her from the glass enclosure and put her back in the following day. At times he wanted to comfort her but what was the point in pretending to be a good person? It was better if they both hated him.

Once Sammy was regularly able to kill whatever bugs he put her with, he moved on to slightly bigger things; mice and rats and lizards. She improved with incredible speed, and although she had at first seemed terrified during fights now that it had become routine she just looked determined.

After she had killed whatever it was that Ryker had paired her with that day she would look up at him with a deathly glare, catching her breath. He would simply stare back at her, wondering what she was thinking. Perhaps she was imagining him on the other end of the needle instead of a rat. Sometimes he would imagine the same thing.

Eventually he handed her off to Joseph Wells, the organiser he signed a contract with. Ryker would attend Sammy's fights and watch, disturbed at the way the other spectators looked on with gleeful and amused expressions. He would keep a calm and unaffected frown on his face, arms crossed in contemplation.

When the Kriegerin project was still running many many years ago Ryker used to watch those fights. They were violent and full of death…but it was not for entertainment. It was a necessary evil that Ryker had never claimed to enjoy.

Now, sitting amongst the crowd of humans, Ryker felt anger growing inside of him; resentment. But this was needed for Sammy to be strong enough— if she could not fight well then there would be no point in giving the serum to her. Giving someone magic without ensuring that they would be capable of using it was useless.

In the meantime, Ryker pondered on what to do with Tanner. He wasn't a good candidate for magic as far as he could tell; much too soft. And it would take years before the proper preparations could be made anyway. But could he just treat him nicely?

No. Of course not.

If he started to treat Tanner with kindness whilst putting Sammy through the fighting and humiliation he had signed her up for, that would cause a wedge in their relationship. It was better for them both to hate him than for them to hate each other, and as bad as he felt for doing it he kept reminding himself of how far he was.

There were many times where he considered stopping altogether. Sometimes Tanner would end up falling asleep in his hand whilst he was scribbling down notes and Ryker could feel the guilt overwhelming him all over again. Sometimes he would stare at the pistol in his drawer and consider using it…but it felt selfish to give himself a way out like that.

He felt so frustrated with himself that sometimes it would end up being directed at the children. He felt bad every time he snapped— he would never yell at them but sometimes he was surprised by the words coming out of his mouth. He had never hurt them either. Even if he didn't want them to like him, the thought of doing something like that intentionally made him sick to his stomach.

Sammy had become well known within borrower fighting events, but she had also become more withdrawn. She was as feisty as ever; loud and abrasive towards him for understandable reasons, but Ryker had noticed a shift when he had started to leave her with Wells for longer in between events.

He asked the organiser if something had happened and got a no in response, so he let it be. Almost two years passed before he finally found out the truth.

Sammy had suddenly broken down when Ryker held her down on the desk to take her measurements again. He would measure both of them regularly, but this time was different. She wasn't fighting him in defiance like usual, this time she seemed desperate. Ryker was so taken aback that he released her immediately, watching as a panic attack claimed her.

Once she was breathing properly again, Ryker spoke.

“What happened? Are you injured?” The only thing different from him taking the measurements this time than what he usually did was that he was doing it the day after he retrieved her from Wells. She hadn't ended up participating in a fight this time so he saw no issue with it, but the only idea he had for what might be wrong is that she had been hurt and he had accidentally pressed down on an injury.

As his hands moved in to check her over he saw how she flinched away, defending herself rather than fighting back like she usually would. Ryker stopped again but his brows furrowed as he leaned down.

“Tell me. Now.” He ordered. He couldn't just sit around guessing— if something unexpected had happened he needed to deal with it immediately. If Sammy was injured he needed to treat it immediately. He didn't have time for the cat and mouse act.

She was hesitant as she recounted her experiences at the hands of Wells, and others. Ryker felt like he was in shock hearing about it— his hands withdrawing away from her immediately.

“For how long?”

Almost the whole time. Basically as soon as Ryker had been leaving her alone with the disgusting human.

“T-they said they liked my hair… I hate it now… Sometimes I just want to rip it all out…” She murmured. That was enough. This was too much. He didn't even know how to offer comfort because it was his fault in the first place. She even seemed surprised by his shock, like she thought he knew about it from the start.

That night Ryker went to Wells again; this time with a pistol tucked into his jacket. He didn't say a word when he shot him, simply making sure he was dead by making sure there were no bullets left in the chamber. He vented his anger by kicking and throwing some of his furniture around, then broke down himself.

The next day, Ryker took Sammy to the metal desk. She predictably tried to get away and he sighed, slamming his hand down in her path to throw her off before reaching down to hold her between his forefinger and thumb.

“Stop moving…”

He pinched his fingers around her waist to keep her still and pulled out a pocket knife. At first she struggled, startled by the large blade as he brought it closer, seemingly thinking he was going to stab her.

“Shh. It's for your hair.” He didn't bring it any closer yet, waiting for her to stop squirming so he wouldn't accidentally cut her. He paused for a moment, thinking. “Do you…want me to cut it? If you don't, I won't.”

It was one of the first times he had ever asked for permission, but in this situation he felt it was appropriate. Sammy slowly stopped struggling, peering up at him with confusion. Ryker was frowning but he looked sincere…so she nodded.

He brought the knife closer, slowly, before carefully cutting at the tiny girl's hair. He wasn't a professional by any means and it looked messy, but he tried to keep it even. Once he was done he put her back and left both borrowers alone, only getting close when he was giving them food or water.

It was quiet again. Just like when Charlie died. Ryker could feel his motivation to continue dwindling with each passing day. When Tanner managed to escape and ended up being exposed to the serum Ryker could do nothing about it besides keep Sammy from seeing. With Tanner gone Sammy had become depressed and unresponsive.

After a month of this, Ryker decided to give Sammy the serum. Because of all the training then it should hopefully be compatible rather than doing what it did to Tanner. Ryker didn't even know for certain what had happened to him, just that his body had started to glitch and destabilise, before disappearing entirely.

He was wrong. The same thing happened to Sammy. Somehow the glitches didn't spread over her whole body, but instead it was her left arm that was affected. It wasn't bleeding, but it was no longer there. That was his final straw.

Ryker managed to make a tiny bionic limb to replace the arm that was lost, and although he noticed Sammy had some physical changes after being exposed to the serum; her eyes changing colour and her hair starting to grow in a much lighter colour; he saw no signs of her being able to use magic. It had all been for nothing.

He apologised over and over again despite knowing he could not be forgiven. He destroyed his notes and burned his research in frustration, not knowing what to do now that he was giving up. There was no reason to make Sammy hate him anymore, but there was also no reason for her to not hate him. Where else could she go though?

Because of him she was alone.

When she escaped, Ryker searched everywhere for her, worried that she would get hurt out there. He had seen just how disgusting humans could be— and what if one found her? She hated him, yes, but ultimately she would be safer with him. He wouldn't keep her in a cage or anything anymore, he just wanted to do something to make up for everything he had done.

There was no trace of Sammy anywhere.

Ryker was alone again.

[sunny-mercya]

Ordinary Godly

Apollo x Male Reader

Fandom -> Percy Jackson Series

Masterlist

Percy Jackson, who has fought a variety of Monsters and argued—even battled at some point—with the Godly deities of the mighty Olympus, had expected everything—when stepping into the home of Jason and Will, with the rest of his little friends troop—but nothing like this.

Seeing you, the deity of tranquility and slumber—another brother of Hypnos—for the very first time in actuality—was a weird experience of meeting for Percy.

»THERE YOU ARE! MY TWO PRECIOUS SUMMER BOYS! OH, NICO! I GREET YOU TOO, COME HERE!«

You had emerged from the Kitchen, baggy clothes—consisted of a large tee with the print of some band name and lyrics quote and pyjama pants—covered in what seemed to be flour and cocoa powder.

Your voice was loud, filled with thrilling excitement of joyfulness. Taking Jason and Will into your arms, hugging them tightly against you and giving each of them more than just a few kisses to the cheeks and head. Nico had been pulled into this as well, suffering through much affection as well.

You're radiating more hyperactivity energy and child like behaviour off, than the emotions you're meant to send out.

Walking into a home, in which Jason and Will had grown up with their two godly parents, which looked so damn mundane humane—that Percy had to take a double check on that Cookie Tin-can, filled with sewing stuff.

It confused him. If they all had learned one thing of being Demigods—half children of godly blessings, which sometimes could be seen as a curse though—that none of the gods and goddesses—their other parentally half—live like a ordinary human.

Always exotic enormously flashy, expensive, but never dare to boring and dull—than a god whose dull and pathetic unnoticeable, could not be worthy for eternity of mighty existence.

Yet, Percy thought, both the house and you are a stark contrast to what they have been told. Simple and ordinary.

»Are we sure this is really a deity?« asked Percy in a hushed whisper, leaning down to Annabeths ear and elbowing her in the side.

»I haven't seen Demosonos personally, but I highly doubt Jason and Will wouldn't recognised their parent.« she whispered back, keeping wary glances at them—some Gods can't be trusted.

Nico who had managed to free himself from the suffocating hug of love, stepped back to them and hissed in the same hushing voice of whispers;

»Do you two have any death wishes? Don't upset them.«

I mean, Percy thought—letting his gaze wander back to you—if we do so, what would happen? Ares, Zeus, Hades, Athena and his own father—Poseidon—are much more scarily and worthy of being called merciless fighters.

You on the other hand, looked—truthfully—weak. Percy could for sure, probably, take you down in seconds.

After all, from what he could gather, you're more than just a minor god—even less than minor, a subcategory inside a subcategory—unworthy to be mention with the same breath of saying Nxy, Hypnos and all the way to Morpheus.

Still, Percy is after all confused to why their Prophecy and Quest is, to seek you out and ask for your help.

Lesser Gods aren't helpful, they're more a nuisance.

~~~

»And this must be your other friends? Right? Perseus and Annabeth?« the question was more towards your sons.

You stepped towards the two teens, Will had already pulled Nico away to the Sofa and Jason had gone to the Kitchen, greeting loudly his other dad.

Percy and Annabeth felt both a bit uncomfortable with your vacant stare and the friendly smile on your lips.

»Uhh, It's Percy actually, I don't liked to be called Perseus« Percy didn't know, why of all the things he could say, decided to say this—but he did, mouth being faster than his brain again—and Annabeth elbowed him hard in the rips, a tiny gaps of breath intake left her lips.

The friendly smile never wavered from your lips, nodding at them—they couldn't tell if you had even listen properly, vacant glint still in your eyes—head dropping a bit to the side.

»Aah! You want some tea and Sweets? C'mon, c'mon, now don't be shy you two, take a seat. Will be a dear and help me« clapping your hands, you ushered the two teens to the Sofa, skipping already to the Kitchen.

»I will explain later a bit,« with that being said, Will stood up as well.

Neither of the three said anything, looking around the living room with more interest than addressing the current situation—or more issues perhaps?

»I thought you knew what he is like Nico....I mean with you being Wills boyfriend, you are prone to meet his parents«

»Hey hey, don't come at me now Chase. I only have met Mr. [Surname] like three times and that was in the city.«

»Small tip of advice, don't be so stiff. Relax a little or Pa's gonna worry again« they hadn't noticed Jason, who have come back from the kitchen with a tray of Tea cups and Kettle.

Will following soon after with a Tray of sweets and pastries, setting it down on the coffee table. They both getting comfortable on the sofas—Jason on the main big one, while Will had sat with Nico on the right mini sofa and Percy and Annabeth on the left—again.

Nico instantly following Jasons advice, relaxing his body and sliding just a bit down.

When Apollo had entered the living room, Annabeth and Percy gasped loudly in surprise. Standing up they bow their head or more like, Annabeth forced Percy to do as well.

»Lord Apollo!«

»Since when did you become a Lord? Aren't you a God?« you asked in amused surprise, taking a seat as well.

»Apparently just now, love« Apollo shrugged, Will started to laugh and Jason sighed in disappointment, shaking his head—so much for giving advice to his friend, to not be so formally stiff and causing tension.

~~~

The hours passed and Percy and Annabeth had relaxed over the times. Coming to the conclusion that you aren't one of the tricky gods—like Ares—who likes to use them as soldiers.

You asked them various questions, be it about the quest or some daily things; like what's your favourite TV-Show.

It wasn't long till you slumped, actually passing out from something akin to exhaustion and sleep, body leaning against Apollo—who had long wrapped an arm around you in a protective manner.

Jason stood up, taking your legs and moving them onto the couch. Getting a blanket from the footstool—where are tower of them was stacked—and covering you a bit to the hips with it.

Percy couldn't help himself but to stare at the marks—he first took notice of them when you handing him a gummy-bear—which covers your arms, starting from your wrist and ending somewhere at your neck or collarbone.

He had seen these types of Marks before. Racking his brain for the information he had read about or being told from.

Oh.

Percy jumped up, snapping his fingers and pointing—accusingly—at you. Head turning to Annabeth and again his mouth had been faster than his brain.

»That's THE DEMON OF OLYMPUS!« he had shouted it so loud, that your body jerked up—stirring awake is what you begun, already mumbling something sleepily out of context.

Apollo moved you quickly into his arms, shushing you gently back to the dreamlands and humming a little tune of it.

A mess had started to erupt between them all.

»I know! It's still highly disrespectful to point that out, seaweed brain!« Annabeth slapped him hard against the shoulder.

»Do you have a death wish, Jackson? Do you want us get killed?« hissed Nico, giving a glare, sitting uptight again and body going absolutely rigid stiff.

The worst part for Percy was probably the disbelieving disappointment frown on both, Jasons and Apollos—though his frown looked more like concealed bubbling anger—face.

Apollon stood up with you in his arms, ready to walk out. Will was about to stand up as well, wanting to go with his father.

»I'll take it from here boys. I expect from you two to inform your friends properly now, to ensure that such outrageous behaviour won't happen again.«

»Wow, way to go Percy. Upsetting one of the kinder gods in just one go.« Will wanted to laugh, to make it seem that it wasn't that bad, but his laugh came more like a strangled cry out.

»How many times did we, did I, told you to keep your mouth shut in more than just one occasion?!« chastised Annabeth, giving him another shoulder slap.

»No, honestly Percy, be fucking glad Pa had another slumber episode of his or you would....I don't know, but it wouldn't be nice.«

»But he's the Demon of Olympus! Isn't he not? The marks of Zeus's banning are a clear sign of it. I don't get why we need help from an evil deity who also deceives everyone to believe he's being known as a lesser god«

»Even for you Perseus, that's a new personal low! How dare you to say such horrible things about my Pa.« Jason stomped off, the anger radiating off and his face slightly red from it.

Will had decided to inform Percy properly about his dad's complete and historical story. He didn't want his parents to be offended—or feel upset and angered—after all they need their help and support for the upcoming—already starting—quest.

You're the brother, a child from Nyx, of Hypnos. It is true, your actual deity personality, form and power is akin to one of chaos—you're a personification of weather—raging storms to be exact—and a sneer of demonic vileness petty violence.

During a darker time in history, Zeus had strikes you with lightning—sealing your actuality, banning them for a balance—and splitting you into what you are now; god of tranquility and slumber.

The splitting had also caused a turn in personality itself. Making you more childish, airhead and forgetful. Kindness from you, comes not completely naturally—feeling more forced without meaning to, though you do love and this was a genuine one.

»Yeah okay, but why is Demosonos—uh, [Name], with your father, Will?«

»They're married?«

»Why?«

»You're officially demoted from Seaweed brain to dumbweed brain.« muttered Nico, pinching the bridge of his nose.

»They married for like years and that's because out of actual love and I'm not gonna tell you their sappy love story.«

»Still I don't get how like Lord Apollo, who blends like the sun, is being married freely to someone like him, a actual demonic person«

»I–oh my fucking god, Percy. My dads are married because they love one another, completely smitten they are, how hard is that to understand?!« Will groaned in desperation, taking a handful of biscuits again—had he almost eaten the whole bowl.

And Nico thought, how a great way to upset a God and already dooming their quest in the very beginning.

~~~

Jason felt hesitant, as if he were five again and didn't wanted to disrupt his parents sleeps because he had a nightmare, to step into the bedroom.

Respectfully he knocked a few times on the door, before opening it and stepping inside.

The bedroom was almost shrouded in complete darkness, except for the dimmed nightshade next to the bed.

Apollo had acknowledged his son, didn't say anything though—to occupied to lay in bed next to you, hand supporting his head as he drove his fingers through your hair.

A cooled washcloth was placed over your face. You hadn't started to sweat, sign of upcoming fever, but Apollon didn't wanted to risk it—doing a prevention beforehand.

What most, be it his own kind or humans, didn't know is that Zeus lightning strike to you has caused more than just a split personality—created a rift in your health, leaving you vulnerable and weak and prone to sickness.

Apollo couldn't do much about it. Not even with his powers of healing, leaving him a pit of despair and self-hatred whenever you got sick.

»Do you know the actual, not that stupidly outrageous idea of us gods being unfaithful, I mean some truly are, reason, why we have decided to let you and Will and all your other siblings been born from Humans?«

»No,« Jason shook his head, debating with himself if he should sit or lay down next to you, in the end he chose a mix of both.

Jason had sometimes wonders why it always had been that way—being born from humans and a deity—even though gods and goddesses could bear children just as well.

When he had been younger, wasn't all that long ago in his early teen years—memory still fresh in mind and sometimes upsetting him—he had accused his father, they had another argument that day, he never had loved dad in the beginning and being unfaithful to him—cheating with woman's and only seeing you as some kind of trophy.

That day was the only day and time where Jason had seen Apollo with actual anger on his face. The kind of anger which bubbles in you till it turns into hatred and pettiness.

»It's because your dad wouldn't survive the procedure of giving birth and I mind you, the whole explanatory of the aspect itself of how we gods and goddesses giving birth and the many various ways to do so, is chaotic complexing on its own.«

»You mean, dad would die? But you are immortals and immortals aren't meant to die«

»Yes and no. Even though we're immortals of eternity, there are still ways—ancient barbaric ones—to kills us or at least in a sense of us being dead. No, no, Jay, the reason isn't death, he just wouldn't survive.«

Jason furrowed his brows, not understanding what his father meant or trying to tell him.

»You well aware of what happened to your dad, his history. Zeus had strike him down, leaving him in the few hours of unconsciousness—which had caused a spurt of utterly violent storms throughout the land—vulnerable and unable to defend himself against any sort of danger and hostile.«

»Are you trying to tell me that, Zeus had, you know—with dad?«

»Dear lord! Jason! Absolutely not! Don't ever think of such disgusting scenarios and manners again.«

Apollo sighed deeply, not having expected his Son to come to such conclusions. You stirred again, your hand coming up to your face and taking the washcloth off.

Bleary you opened your eyes, trying to make out where you are and who you are.

Apollo, praying silent apologies already, leaning down to you—pressing a soft kiss onto your lips and with a quick whisper of humming lullaby, brought you back into the grips of slumber. Unconscious you rolled onto your side, over to him and into his arms.

»You put him into force sleep! Didn't you told us to never use our powers of sleep in such forceful ways? It's a rule number one!«

Apollo raised a brow at his son, who looked absolutely mortified for a good minute and turned into distasteful disappointment.

»Now now, my son, don't give me such gaze. I too am not proud of what I did, but it had to be done. It's still a sensitive topic and I don't want to cause a distress, disturbance or even distrust perhaps. Now, where was I? Aah yes—«

»So like I said, during the hours of unconsciousness, a wave of sickness rolled over—custody of Pandora's box being opened—and infected painfully your dad. Leaving him, once he had woke up, in a whimpering withering anxiety filled mess.«

»And that's how you meet Dad then, right?«

»That's a story for another, but yes. Anyways, to what I'm trying to say is, your dad is still too vulnerable and weak—sickness prone, to be able to handle the whole procedure of giving birth. I mean we tried it once and only, but.....let's just say, dad still has scars from it. And thus the reason why we and perhaps most of us gods, decided to let our children been born from humans.«

Jason gulped, trying to not choke on his tighten up throat. He hadn't been aware of it, how the true story had happened, but it all makes so much sense now.

The times you got so bedridden, unable to do anything but sleep, that Will cried for days and nights thinking you're about to die from incurable illness.

Or when Will had been still a child, having gotten a nasty flu and you had to take care of Will and him—Jason himself had been in some bad mood the whole week to even consider to help you out as he was the older brother after all—all on your own, because his father had been away for business trips—and you looked so exhausted and ready to pass out any minute, that Jason hadn't even question back then why you took pills after pills and chugged cups of coffee.

Jason understands so much better now, why you never got angry—like he had been, when founding out—when Apollo had intercourse with yet another woman.

He understood why you're so prone to sudden collapse of exhaustion and slumbering sleep during the day or in the middle of doing something.

And then he felt a rush of rage through his blood.

You didn't deserve to be treated like this, to be frowned upon down or with that false kindness the other deities treated you with.

You didn't deserve to either called a demonic being or naively dumbling of airy forgetfulness.

Jason hated it. Hated them, the ones above and those below. How dare they to make you feel so unwanted and filling you with seeds of self-hatred and anxiety—when you give nothing but pure love to him and his siblings.

Jason wasn't blind, his father neither—though the man chose to completely ignore it, when you once again had puffy red rimmed eyes—when you had cried in the bathroom during nights and mumbling things to yourself, Jason didn't want to repeat.

Jason decided, this prophecy wasn't worth it to bring you once again pain and remind you of the haunting past.

If it meant to sabotage the quest, he would do. After all his loyalty and love belongs to only you and not to the greater ones above, who hadn't even the slightest fuck to give about their children.

[dellalalakang]

yjw: up first

masterlist | main masterlist

jungwon slowly discovers the pleasures that come with having a partner

contains: what they're doing is sfw! but it contains some spicy talk and some racy action. i guess it's 15+ 

oh hey guys.. what's up?

yjw

For the whole two years I (well, we) spent with Della, I have never once had any sexual thoughts about her. Not even when I heard the hyungs and her go at it like animals in heat.

I know Sunoo did, which is why he went ahead and did stuff after he turned twenty. We made a pact to not lose our virginity before everyone's an adult, and he took full advantage of the loopholes.

Though I don't blame him anymore, because I get it now.

I don't know what it is but a switch turned on. Everything seems different when you're twenty. Especially everything Della does.

"Kiss here?" Della pointed at the side of my neck. This is our first comeback since I turned into an adult, and they want kiss marks on our necks (excluding Niki). Incredibly suggestive and sexy. 

We were initially really against this, but turns out Della would be the one to leave the print, so I guess it's totally fine in the end.

But I'm up first and I've never had my neck kissed. I don't know why I'm so nervous. It's probably similar to a normal kiss, right? 

Right?

"Yup, just there," the creative director nodded. "Maybe have it slightly askew."

"Okay, understood," Della nodded, putting on a burgundy lipstick as the cameraman for our photoshoot sketch recorded her. The rest of the members were all watching from afar, trying to be subtle with how excited they are for their turn. "Ready, Wonie?"

"Mm," I stretched out my neck for easier access. "Della is gonna make a kiss print on my neck," I explained to the camera.

"We're all friends here," Della clarified. "This is just bros being bros," she said in English.

Yeah right, like Engenes (or anyone) is gonna believe that.

"It's just a print," I added, immediately holding my breath when Della's head moved close.

When it happened...

Yeah the kiss itself barely felt like much, probably because it was so short. 

Though as someone who doesn't understand what being ticklish is like, her breath on my neck left a weird sensation. I couldn't decide if I actually enjoyed it since it ended so quick. 

But I wanted more, I needed more.

"Like this?" Della asked the creative director.

"Uhh..." he stepped back and thought of it for a second. "It might be too sexy actually. It's a little too... suggestive– too grown up" he tilted his head. "Will buttoning up his shirt help? Jungwon, can you button your shirt?" from the corner of my eye, I could see the hyungs now openly staring at us.

"I think we have to discard the kiss idea and just switch to vampire bites," the creative director said. "Unbutton them to how it was before and I'll inform the makeup team of the change," damn, I hope the hyungs can control their expressions when the news gets delivered. "Please scrap this from the video," he informed the cameraman before walking away.

"I'll get going now," Della bowed her head and left to join the others.

"What happened?" I caught Sunghoon asking the girl. 

"The kiss thing is scrapped. We're getting vampire bites instead," immediately after, a chorus of 'ahh...'s were heard.

I barely managed to hold in a scoff. It's just one tiny neck kiss, what's the big deal?

If it's just one tiny neck kiss, then why are you wanting more?

Maybe it's good that I was up first.

"Hyung," I approached Jay as he was cooking. Deja vu. "Can I ask you something?"

"What is it?" I looked around to make sure no one was hearing.

"Is sex... that good?" what the actual heck, Yang Jungwon. That was not the question I wanted to ask. "I mean! Not sex! But like– l-like.. is there a reason why the hyuppas are so... horny..?" he let out a laugh and ruffled my hair before answering.

"What's got you thinking about this? Are you having dirty thoughts of Della?" I started to play with the sleeves of my shirt.

"The photoshoot yesterday was just... I don't know... Her breath on my neck like that... It just got me thinking," I shook my head. What is up with me. "Like you were all really looking forward to it and I wondered exactly why and figured it had something to do with... sex I guess?"

For God's sake, Jungwon. Do you know how ridiculous you sound? Your girlfriend left a PECK on your neck and now you're seeking advice from your experienced hyung.. again.

"Ahh, well I think that the intimacy of sex is like no other. The pleasure's great and all, it's basically like jerking off but better," he explained everything without halting his cooking. "The intimacy is what's amazing really. You know how good you feel when you make out Della? It's just that but tenfold."

That's... it? I expected him to go on and on about how life changing it is.

"Honestly I'm the wrong person to ask because I'm not as horny as the other three, but!" he stopped a bit to look at me. "I can tell you that you should start off slow. Based on your question, it seems like you've never even experienced neck kisses, and that is almost entirely innocent. You can just start off with that."

"I know that! I'm not gonna get into it and immediately ask for a..." I didn't know what the word was so I just mimed myself pumping an imaginary penis.

"A handjob?" ahh, that's what it's called.

"Mm! Anyway, I was just mostly curious as to why you guys are always getting at it," he raised his hands in defense after my point.

"Eyy, you should ask Della why her libido's so high too! It takes two to tango, you know– well... at least two in our case," ...gross. "–and for the record, the reason why we were bummed about the photoshoot's kiss cancellation was entirely out of possessive reasons like we just wanted to show off how we're Della's."

Well in that case, I'm glad that I went up first for the shoot.

'Just take things slow, Wonie,' Jay's advise was in mind as I approached Della's room. 'Start with neck kisses.'

Should I approach Della and be blunt about this? Should I just pretend like I'm going with the flow and vibe of everything? I usually go with the former but it's also usually never something racy.

I have to admit that I'm a bit envious of how her relationship with the other members have progressed. Our first kiss took place five months into our relationship, and it was only about a year later that we began to include tongue. We're progressing so slowly that even Niki is moving faster. Way faster.

I think I had this preconceived notion that things like french and neck kisses were sexual acts, and I learned very late that it isn't (always) true. Jay said that it doesn't have to be if they're gentle and doesn't contain any provocative intentions.

Well... what should I do? Do I have provocative intentions?

Am I thinking about this too much? Should I just ask her like normal? Is it too weird though? What if she thinks I'm lame? Does she already think that way becau–

My anxious thoughts were cut short when the door suddenly opened to reveal the devil herself.

"Jesus! 깜짝이야!" Della jumped and placed a hand on her heart. [kkamjjakiya = i'm sure you all know what it means because of jake]

"Sorry! Sorry!" I held my hands up in front of me. "I didn't mean to surprise you, I was gonna knock!"

"No, no, it's fine," she leaned against the door and let out a breath. "What's up?"

"Were you planning on doing something?" please say no, please say no.

"Just wanted to get some strawberry milk, but that's it," oh thank God.

"Can I come in and just chill? I miss you," she let out a smile before coming close to give me a peck.

"Of course, Wonie. I'll be quick," is it just me or does she want me in a different way? Her eyes are looking a little different.

Damn, I guess Sunoo wasn't kidding when he said that everyone has a bit of delusion mixed in them.

As I was left alone for two minutes, I came to a quick conclusion that I should.. start it off? Maybe I should kiss her neck first.

"You're in the mood to cuddle, darling?" Della took a long sip from her drink and joined me on the bed.

"Mmm," I closed my eyes, wrapping my arms around her.

"Do you wanna watch something?" I can feel her gaze on my face as her fingers played with the hair by my nape.

"No," I opened my eyes to stare into hers. "I wanna kiss you though," was that too blunt?

"Eh? Do you wanna try something?" darn... she knows me too well.

Your cover's blown, Wonie. Just come clean.

...nah, I'm just gonna kiss her.

I didn't answer her question and just connected our lips together. Her mouth tasted of the strawberry milk she just drank, and her lips were a bit slick from her lip oil. 

But yet again, the kiss is going slow like it always is. It's usually how I like it but I'm over it now. I want more.

So I decided to take charge.

I gently pushed her on her back and got on top of her, deepening the kiss and adding tongue. I could feel Della hold her breath for a bit, possibly taken aback from the shift.

This is also a first for us. The only time we've ever hovered the other was for performances.

My hands went from her waist to the sides of her face, really getting into the kiss. She hummed and brought one of her hands to my cheek while the other kept their grip on my hair.

Here goes nothing.

I slowly pulled away and immediately started pressing kisses down to her neck.

From what I've observed (mostly from Heeseung), I'm pretty sure that her 'sweet spot' is located under her right jaw. Otherwise why else would they constantly target the same spot over and over again.

I'm not really sure what makes this spot so sweet and I'm also unsure why everyone's is different. I'm guessing it means the person's ultimate pleasure point.

When I reached it, I started to just gave out small pecks which eventually turned to normal kisses.

I could feel that the vibe was a bit awkward based on how tense Della was. It was as if she didn't want me to kiss her neck.

"Wonie– darling," she pat my shoulder. "Give me a second," but before I could fully pull away, Della had already used her strength to flip us over so she was on top. "Lemme try first," and then she attached her lips to my neck, just like that.

She started leaving open kisses from my Adam's apple and slowly travelling towards the right side of my neck. I didn't realise that I was holding my breath until I breathed out when she reached a certain spot.

Again, I'm not a ticklish person by any means but I'm guessing that this is what it feels like.

But it feels amazing. It's what I imagined having your neck scratched as a cat would be like.

It's really, really nice.

Without even realising it, my throat let out a small moan while my body just stayed frozen in place, unable to fully comprehend what was happening.

She relaxed her posture and focused on that one spot, tilting her head to kiss deeper.

I began to let out soft moans after moans as her tongue swirled around the skin. 

"A–ah!" I hissed when she started sucking lightly. "Lala," I start to notice my stiff hands and brought one up to her hair.

"Do you like that, Wonie?" she whispered against my skin. Fuck me.

"Yeah," I breathed out, caressing her hair gently.

"Was this what you wanted to try out?" she giggled in between her kisses. I felt her mouth and tongue circling their way around the area. She wasn't in the exact same spot as earlier but the ticklish feeling was still there.

"Mm," I held my breath as she began to suck some more. I heard her let out a low chuckle.

"Cute," no fucking way.

I immediately placed my hands on her back to turn us over again. Her lips automatically detached themselves from my neck and the surprise was clear in her eyes. Especially when I pinned her hands beside her head like they do in the dramas.

"I'm not cute," I pretty much mumbled. 

I caught a glimpse of myself on Della's mirror and quickly did a double take at the sight.

"Oh my God," I whispered in English, stretching my neck to get a clearer look at the marks she left. This actually happened and is actually happening.

"They'll fade away in half an hour or something. I didn't suck too hard," Della bit her lip.

"Thirty minutes, huh?" I looked to the mirror again. "Now that you've taught me, I guess I can suck a bit harder," I turned back and stared into her eyes.

"Gotta make sure the members know what happened."

I'm really glad I was up first for the shoot.

please i hope my creativity is back and is willing to stay

bonus scene in my first acc!

taglist: @duolingofanaccount @lalalalawon @clar-iii @deafeningballoonpeach

[abyssalzones]

What's your comic writing process like? I'm starting to get into making my own comics and I really admire your work!!! Any advice?

Ah, intrepid traveler, you've done well to journey to this secluded mountaintop spire, in search of the answers you seek. I indeed can provide such forbidden comicmancy knowledge... at the cost of your mortal soul...

coughs. anyway, I'm going to warn you immediately that what works for me does not work for everyone else, and in my experience the way I do things can prove very slow and discouraging for anyone who is more interested in the actual "drawing the damn comic" part of the process. I only do it this way because I enjoy weaving a narrative web that feels not only fully contained but re-readable, but my projects are often so long and my memory so shitty that I can't just keep all of it in my head! It would spill all over the place and make a really embarrassing mess of brain-juice. Not ideal.

but as for my own process, uhh... I suppose a comic would be fitting, right?

a little choppy but you get the idea.

as for turning words into art, I've been experimenting with figuring out the best way to do that for a little while now. Originally what I was doing for something like Ad Astra Per Aspera was to take my "script" and sketch it out on paper very loosely, before transposing that onto my canvas and working from there:

...but, I've found that can make it kind of difficult to space everything around on your standard page-size, and the thing I'm having the most problems with currently seems to be finding the sweet spot of panel-size proportions. So, I've taken to printing out standard thumbnail templates (you can just find these on google) and sketching very tiny panels in those, which seems to give me a slightly better sense of scale... (mild chapter 5 spoilers, sorry ad astra fans)

but I have yet to totally pull through on this, so who knows, maybe I'll try something else in the future!

As for advice, this is probably most applicable to me, but as a disabled artist I have a very hard time managing my workload without literally working myself into injury. I don't think I talked about this publicly but when I was working on that ten year anniversary comic I was literally drawing every single day for 3 solid months. Sometimes, in my case, I really can't bring myself to stop once I've latched onto an idea, and sometimes I find the most rewarding thing I can do with my time is to draw- but I seriously cannot overstate: Do not fucking do this.

You will fuck up your wrist, your back, your neck, your eyes, and probably your mental health. It's a well-known fact that mangaka have a lower life expectancy than the average japanese person due to the intense workload imposed on them by deadlines and personal expectations. Comics are a very demanding artform, and even though I'm not on any sort of mandated schedule there are times where I've toiled away at something when I likely should have been exercising or taking vision-breaks. Therefore the best advice I can give you is to chill the hell out.

Namely, find parts of the process you can be lazy about, and embrace the laziness! You don't like digitally sketching? Don't do it! Skip it, or maybe find a way to traditionally sketch things out in advance like I do. Hate lineart? Don't fucking do it. You really don't feel like wasting your time writing 72k words of comic scripts? ...then, don't be like me. skip that part. I'm a flawed human being and what works for me might not work for you.

The second most important piece of advice I could give is to read comics. Of all kinds. The reason for this is pretty self explanatory: In order to figure out your own comic-making style, you should first pick out bits and pieces from the artist's buffet to add to your plate. Manga, graphic novels, american comics, european comics, weird niche little webcomics, funny papers, anything and everything. This advice rings true of pretty much any art form, but I find it to be essential to honing comic-making skills because so many things you feel will just come intuitively often don't. and that's okay! nobody is born knowing how to leave space for speech bubbles or shape their panels in a way that imitates stretches of time. The best way to figure out stuff like this, in my experience, is to study the "masters", and then after becoming well accustomed to the basics, figure out what rules you want to bend or break to create your own style.

I consider myself to be in equal parts a writer and an artist, which lends itself well to making narrative comics, but maybe you're a bit more of an artist and want to focus on panel-by-panel visual storytelling. Or, conversely, maybe your talents lean closer towards writing, and the art itself is more of a secondary skill. Regardless of your unique blend of talents you can and should make a comic, you should just also be aware of your strengths and try to hone in on those- there will always be opportunities to build up skills you lack, but focusing on what you do best will always lead you in the right direction.

Anyway, that being said, here are some recommendations in no particular order:

Monster, Naoki Urasawa (!!)

Bone, Jeff Smith

Witch Hat Atelier, Kamome Shirahama

The first IDW run of Transformers comics (namely More Than Meets the Eye and Lost Light)

Persepolis, Marjane Satrapi (!!)

Through the Woods, Emily Carroll (really any Emily Carroll comics)

Kill Six Billion Demons (webcomic) (!!)

Akira, Katsuhiro Otomo

The Third Person, Emma Grove

Tintin, Hergé (can be super racist please be wary)

Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui

Calvin & Hobbes, Bill Watterson

Maus, Art Spiegelman

Cucumber Quest (webcomic)

Jellyfish Princess, Akiko Higashimura

Golden Kamuy, Satoru Noda (!!)

Note that I did not grow up with manga so I am seriously behind on a lot of extremely influential japanese comics such as Dragon Ball, One Piece, basically any of the original Shonen Jump comics, but they're widely considered building blocks of the genre so if you love the artform I think you should give them a try! Same goes for classic non-shonen manga genres like various Shoujo, Josei, Yuri, Gekiga, ETC.

same as above applies to a lot of classic DC and Marvel works, I unfortunately am just not a big fan of superhero comics... but I'm sure there's good stuff in there. a couple of my mutuals talk about booster gold and the blue beetle all the time so I'm assuming there has to be something worthwhile.

...and many, many, many more that I'm forgetting! I noticed as I made this list that, to my knowledge, hardly any of these are made by black or just non-japanese-mangaka BIPOC artists, which makes me sad about the gaps in my own comic collection. Therefore, anyone is welcome to add their own recommendations in the replies!

now go forth, and combine images with text!!!!!!!!!!!

[crazychaoticizzy]

Pretty Portraits

What happens when you, Kugisaki and Itadori find that Fushiguro left his journal behind?

WARNINGS: none. just pure fluff. maybe a tiny bit of angst if you squint really hard.

Word Count: 4.6k

Masterlist

You were just about to leave the booth, only to pause at the sight of a black notebook waiting on the seat. You recognized it at Fushiguro's journal, and when you flipped the cover to see the name written on the inside your suspicions were proved to be correct.

"Hey, Fushiguro forgot his notebook," you said to Itadori and Kugisaki. They both looked away from whatever they were doing, eyeing the notebook in your hands. "Do you guys remember where he said he was going?"

"Uhh, I don't think he actually said where he was going," Itadori said. "If we don't run into him in the school hallways, then we can just leave it in his room."

"Or." Kugisaki drew out the word, sidling up next to you. "We could take a little look inside. See what kind of a person Fushiguro really is."

"Isn't that an invasion of privacy?" Itadori asked.

"Not if he doesn't know."

"I don't think that's how that works," you pointed out.

"Come on, it'd just be a little peek. Besides, he's most likely a really boring person. He probably takes notes on techniques and how he can improve himself. If anything, this will be a learning experience for us if we decide to look through it.”

Kugisaki was right, there was nothing embarrassing in there. You know because you asked one day when he seemed especially invested in his journal. He showed you pages full of notes for different classes and a couple small doodles in the corner. Despite knowing this, you still didn’t want to look through it because you didn’t want to invade his personal belongings.

You shook your head, holding it out to Itadori. “No, I still don’t want to look through it.”

Kugisaki shrugged, taking it from Itadori’s hand and sitting back down in the booth the three of you had just left. She opened it, flipping past the first page, the one with Fushiguro’s name on it. “Okay. Then I’ll look through it and you two can just so happen to look through my shoulder.”

Damn loopholes, you thought. In all honesty, you were curious about what Fushiguro had added since you last saw the contents of the journal.

Despite your better judgement, you sat down beside Kugisaki.

It was just as you had expected, notes about Fushiguro’s classes for a good chunk of the journal. When Kugisaki got tired of staring at Fushiguro’s neat handwriting, she let out a breath and closed it, opening it again to a random page.

More writing, but this page was accompanied by a portrait that looked eerily familiar. The name of the person drawn was on the top of your tongue when Itadori suddenly said something.

”Hey, that kinda looks like Y/n, don’t you think?”

You were way off. You were going to say it looked like a fictional character you had told Fushiguro about a while ago.

”Oh my gosh, this is a letter!” Kugisaki exclaimed. “Hold on it starts in the middle of it on this page.”

Kugisaki flipped back a couple pages, finding that the letter was longer than anticipated. She found the beginning, a grand three pages front and back away from the drawing, and started quietly reading.

”’Y/n, I doubt I’ll ever give this to you or say anything about this, but just know that this is for you.’ Holy shit is this a love letter?”

”Wow.” Itadori stared at the page in awe. “I didn’t think he’d actually write it.” He took the book from Kugisaki’s grasp, flipping through a couple pages.

”You knew about this and didn’t think to tell me?” Kugisaki yelled. She was shushed by a nearby waiter, and she quieted down.

”Fushiguro asked me not to tell anyone, so I didn’t.” Itadori shrugged. “He told me forever ago about this, said he wanted to give it to you when he finished it, but I guess he never did because look at the date.”

He pointed to the corner of the page, where the written date was almost exactly four months ago.

”Damn,” Kugisaki said. “He must have been super inspired about something to write this. Listen, he quoted a couple books. ‘You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.’ God damn, he really used that Pride and Prejudice quote.”

Itadori continued flipping through the pages, now laying the notebook flat on the table for the three of them to see it.

there were multiple pages filled with drawings of you. The pages filled with notes from class were almost completely gone, being replaced by your portraits and short writings accompanied by this reminded me of them to the side.

You stared as they continued flipping through the pages, watching as the drawings improved. The last one was of your side profile, laughing as you held a straw to your lips, about to drink from it. You realized it was from today, and softly ran your fingers over the drawing.

So that’s what he was doing this whole time.

Since that was the last page with anything on it, Itadori closed it and slid it across the table back to you. You didn’t move to touch it, only continued to stare at it.

”Y/n? You okay there?”

You nodded in the general direction of Itadori, moving your hand to grab the black journal. “Yeah. Uh, I’ll take this back to Fushiguro, if you don’t mind. I know you two are busy later anyways.”

Neither of them objected. You assumed this was a situation where they both knew something you didn’t and were most likely over the moon that Fushiguro was finally going somewhere.

You may not be the smartest, but you could definitely piece things together when you’re given enough. You were still unsure, though, so you didn’t want to confront him about it right away.

—

Your knuckles rapped against the wood of Fushiguro’s door, and you gently tapped your fingers against the surface of the black notebook in your hands as you waited for him to answer.

The noise of the door unlocking and opening threw you off guard. It was such a stark contrast to the quiet hallway, and your thoughts had drifted elsewhere completely.

You noticed that Fushiguro stood a little bit straighter when he saw it was you. You briefly wondered if he always did that, or if he only did it for you.

You pushed the thought from your mind not wanting to think about it now.

You took in what he was wearing—gray sweatpants and a black sweater. He looked like he was about to go to bed. It was still early, but you couldn’t blame him. Despite them being your best friends, hanging out with Kugisaki and Itadori could get tiring.

”Uhm, you left this at the booth earlier,” you awkwardly said, holding out the journal to him. “I wanted to bring it back.”

He gently took it from your grasp. “Thanks.”

He didn’t close the door. Instead, he tossed the book to his bed and stepped further outside his room, leaning against the doorframe.

”Where else did you guys go? After I left, I mean,” he said.

”Oh, we just kind of walked around Tokyo for a bit,” you replied. You hid your hands behind your back, playing with your fingers. “We went into a bookstore but didn’t buy anything. We kind of lost Kugisaki and Itadori was summoned by Gojo.”

Fushiguro nodded thoughtfully, putting his hands in his pockets.

You wanted to ask about the drawings in the journal before he continued talking, but you weren’t sure how to bring it up without making it blatantly obvious that you had gone through it. You decided to take a shot, letting your inner self decide what you said.

”Uhm, it fell and I saw some of your drawings,” you said. “Your notebook, I mean. They were really good. I didn’t know you liked doing that.”

Fushiguro’s eyes widened for a brief moment before he returned to his usual stoic expression. His face changed so fast you almost didn’t notice it, but the way he brought his hand up to scratch the side of his neck—one of his nervous ticks you had noticed—told you everything.

”Yeah, I picked it up a few months ago,” he replied. “I do it sometimes at the end of the day to wind down. It helps me relax.”

You nodded. You weren’t sure how to continue the conversation, but you still wanted to know if your suspicion about why he drew you so much was correct.

”Oh, that’s cool. Itadori saw the drawing and said it looked like me,” you decided to say.

”Did he now?” You had caught him with his pants down. He reached up to gently scratch his neck again. “Well, it might have been you. I draw you sometimes for practice. You have a pretty face for that.”

He paused at his own words, crossing his legs at the ankles. He hoped you didn’t notice his wording.

You did. And this time you were the one caught off guard.

”Thank you,” you said. “If that was a compliment. Thanks for saying I have a pretty face.”

He nodded once. “Yeah.”

Awkward silence ensued again. You weren’t sure how much longer you could beat around the bush for. This same routine had randomly started one day and continued almost daily for months. It was annoying, and you wanted it to end.

So you decided to take a leap of faith.

“Uhm, I actually brought that up because I think I know something, but I don’t want to jump to conclusions.”

An indirect leap of faith, but a leap of faith nonetheless.

Fushiguro was listening to you, you could tell because he was looking directly at you, into your eyes. It made you nervous, and you almost brushed off what you were about to say and walked away.

“So, I wanted to tell you my feelings first. And then you could decide how you feel about them. If you want to, that is.”

“Yeah, of course. Do you wanna come inside?” He motioned towards his room. “To get more comfortable, if you want.”

You nodded, following him in. “Sure.”

He gently closed the door behind you, leaving it open a crack before sitting on the bed with you. It was silent for a few moments before he motioned for you to speak.

You took a breath. “So, I’ve been debating telling you this for a while, I just haven’t. But with Kugisaki and Itadori earlier I decided that I should.” You paused for a moment, putting together the next sentence in your head before you said it. “I kind of like you. Like a lot.” You paused again, deciding that was all you needed to say and shrugging with your hands.

You seemed a lot cooler with this confession that you though you would be. You thought you would be a stuttering mess, trying to beat around the bush so much you wouldn’t even know what you were saying. But you didn’t, instead you feigned outward calmness, but you could feel your heart pounding violently against your chest.

Fushiguro’s eyebrows raised as he took in the information.

The action worried you, because he didn’t move for a few moments after that. You sat, waiting for his response. You almost apologized and excused yourself from his room, meaning to hide in your dorm for a couple days until you would be able to face him again, before he gave you a small smile. He stood up, sauntering over to his dresser and opening the top drawer.

When he closed it and turned around, he revealed a square of white paper and held it out to you. You took it, realizing it was an envelope.

“Open it.”

You did as Fushiguro said while he moved across the room, this time opening the bottom drawer of his desk and pulling out a stack of papers along with a small notebook.

You took the paper out of the envelope as he continued what he was doing, opening the folded sheet.

It was a letter. Addressed to you.

You started reading. It had a similar structure as the one you read from his journal earlier, using some of the same wordings and comparisons.

Fushiguro assumed his previous spot on the bed next to you, setting the papers and notebook down beside him. He watched intently as you read the letter, not saying a word as he took in your reaction to his written words.

You were speechless reading it. You didn’t know he could be so wordy and poetic. He never said much. You assumed that he was just a quiet person that didn’t have much to say. Someone that liked observing more than contributing to conversations.

Your assumptions were mostly correct. Except you didn’t realize he noticed or had this much to say. It shocked you, and you weren’t sure what kind of response would match his words.

You were genuinely shocked that he shared the same feelings. You assumed that the dry conversations between the two of you had started because he found out about you liking him. You thought he found that awkward.

But this letter, an explanation for all those awkward moments between the two of you.

Apparently he thought the same thing you did.

Your eyes quickly drifted over the words when you finished. You truly didn’t know what to say, and figured at least trying to form a response in your head would be best.

Your mind drew a blank on what to say. But you had to say something. You would see Fushiguro getting anxious for your response.

When you looked up to meet Fushiguro’s gaze, he was staring at you. You smiled at him, deciding to speak truthfully about what was going through your head.

“I don’t know what to say,” you whispered. “This is the most beautiful writing I’ve ever read. Do you really mean everything?”

“Every single word,” he responded. He handed you a piece of notebook paper from the top of the pile he had brought over. “This was my first drawing of you. I just did it without thought one day and continued. You’re really the only thing I draw.”

You gently took the paper from his grasp, looking it over, admiring the graphite lines, imagining the way his eyes might have followed his pencil, focused.

“Are all of these . . .” You motioned towards the stack of papers beside you, and Fushiguro nodded before you finished your question. “Wow . . .”

You were in awe, returning your gaze to the piece of notebook paper before looking at a couple more.

Fushiguro gently took the paper you held from your hand, putting it aside and taking both of your hands in his. He reached for your jaw, softly redirecting the way your head was turned so you looked directly into his eyes.

“I’ve liked you for a long time, Y/n. I want to be more than friends.” There was a small amount of fear in his eyes. He was terrified you would reject him, despite already knowing how you felt.

Your eyes were wide, your mouth slightly agape. He hadn’t even said anything monumentally heart-wrenching, but just the sound of his voice could leave you speechless.

“Do you really want that?” You quietly asked.

He nodded with complete confidence in his answer. “I do.”

You couldn’t help the smile that overcame your features as you gently squeezed his hand. “Okay. I want that too.”

He didn’t kiss you, and you didn’t kiss him. Not yet. It wasn’t the right moment, and he wanted it to be perfect. So he didn’t kiss you, even though he desperately wanted to. Wanted nothing more than to feel your lips against his, to run his hands through your hair.

Not yet, he told himself. He could wait just a little bit longer.

—

You and Fushiguro (you’re proud to call him Megumi now, even though you still get flustered when you say his name) had been dating for weeks. By now, the news of your relationship had spread to the other first years, who spent a short amount of time exchanging money before congratulating and bombarding the two of you with questions.

Tonight was the first night the two of you had alone since you had gotten together. Itadori and Kugisaki were out, and Gojo was currently over seas for a mission. You and your boyfriend spent the night in the middle of the training field on a couple blankets, snuggling as you stargazed. Though, you weren’t doing much stargazing, instead talking while he showed you his most recent portrait of you.

You were asleep in the drawing, your arm resting under your head as you gripped the blanket in your hands. You were embarrassed he had caught such a moment. He interlocked his pinky with yours, moving your hands from your face as he told you it was cute.

He left a soft kiss on your knuckle, pulling you to sit up with him as he grabbed his journal.

“Can you look at the sky for me?” he asked.

You obliged with a smile on your face, looking at the sky as you began counting stars.

Fushiguro had recently become more open when drawing you. He had asked you to pose for him more, occasionally gently nudging you into the exact position he wanted. He even sometimes did so in front of Itadori and Kugisaki without shame.

You listened as his pencil rubbed against the paper, enjoying the sound. You snuck a glance at him, turning your head to watch as his eyes followed his pencil along the page. Eventually he looked up at you, smiling before he put his hand under your chin, redirecting your gaze.

You apologized with a light chuckle. He continued his drawing, the sounds of his pencil returning. “You’re just so pretty when you draw,” you said.

You heard his pencil suddenly stop. You turned to look at him to find that he was already staring intently at you.

You peeked at the drawing in his notebook, noticing the vague background. “Oh, are you adding a background to this one?”

He moved his gaze to his lap. “Yeah, I like drawing you at night. The sky reminds me of you.”

“How so?”

He took your hand in his, rubbing his thumb along your knuckles. “Well, I realized that you weren’t the sun in my sky.” You raised your eyebrows at him. “I say that because I’ve only ever squinted angrily at the sun. I don’t do that with you. No, I stare at you in wonder and look away when you meet my eyes. I smile when I see you and watch your every action in awe of what you do. I want you to always be present. To be there to help me calm down because just seeing you lifts weight off my shoulders when I’m stressed. Before I met you it was the night sky that did that. It was the night sky that I wished would stay, that I wanted to see to help calm me down.”

Megumi Fushiguro was the only person in the world that could make you speechless, not knowing how to react. And he didn’t even know he was the only person that held this power.

You could feel your eyes burning with tears. He’s constantly moving the bar higher, constantly speaking his mind around you in the most beautiful, poetic way imaginable, constantly taking you by surprise with his words.

You feel bad for never having anything to say in response to him, but he understands how you feel. You usually find yourself replying to him with a tight hug, squeezing him as though if you let go he would disappear.

But tonight, you truly didn’t know what to do.

Watching as your hand moves to cover your mouth, your hand lightly squeezing his own, something in his brain decides that now is the right time. Now is the best time.

He takes a leap, moving his hand to cup your jaw as he gazes into your eyes. His eyes briefly flicker to your lips before he’s slowly leaning in, giving you a chance to reject him if you want.

You don’t reject him. You let him kiss you, freezing as his soft lips met yours. Your eyes were closed, but you didn’t know what to do.

He pulled away, a faint smile painting his lips. “You have to kiss me back, dummy.”

“Sorry,” you apologized. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

He hummed, leaning forward ever so slightly, his lips ghosting yours. “It’s okay.” He kisses you again. This time you kiss back, moving your hand to grip his bicep as if to pull him closer to you.

When you momentarily break the kiss he chases your lips, making you chuckle into the kiss.

“Megumi,” you whispered. He hummed, trying to reach your lips again, making you smile brightly. “Gumi, give me a second.”

He stopped, still holding your hand. “What happened?” Worry was laced in his voice, scared he had done something wrong.

“Nothing, just give me a second.”

You grabbed the notebook from his lap, moving the ribbon to mark the page he was drawing on, closing it and moving it to the side as you shifted closer to him, practically sitting in his lap. He tentatively placed his hands on your waist as you kissed him again, wrapping your arms around his shoulders to try and bring him even closer.

When the kiss broke, this time neither of you moving to kiss the other again, your foreheads rested together as you simply basked in each other’s presence.

He felt the overwhelming urge to say it, something he had been thinking about for a long time. He’s not sure what took possession of him, but the words, “I love you,” were slipping out of his mouth before he could even process it.

Your eyes snapped open, and you pulled away from him just a little bit. He did as well, bringing a hand to cover his face as he began apologizing profusely, saying that he didn’t mean to say that.

The smile that was slowly growing on your face fell. You knew that sometimes his thoughts got jumbled together, making it somewhat difficult to voice them. This had to be one of those situations, but hearing him say he didn’t mean it made your heart crack.

He seemed to realize his words, because he cut himself off, going into another tangent.

“No, that’s not what I mean. I do mean that, but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he admitted. “I don’t want to force you to jump into things too early. If you don’t feel the same way then don’t say it back. Tell me and I won’t say it again until you want me to, I promise.”

His words pulled at your heartstrings. All he wanted was to make sure you were comfortable with the relationship, but in the process he disregards his own feelings. It hurt you. You wanted him to be open, to allow himself to be vulnerable around you, even if it was just for a few minutes.

“Megumi, I want you to share your thoughts with me. It doesn’t matter what it is, if you want to tell me something then tell me. You won’t make me uncomfortable, I promise.” You leaned forward again, capturing him between your arms and squeezing him. “Because I love you, too. I have for a while. I want you to be comfortable with me. I want to be someone you can talk to, your rock. Please share things with me.”

You felt him wrap his arms around you, squeezing you with just as much force as you were. He rested his head in the crook of your neck, taking a deep breath. He loved the way you smelled—lavender, curtesy of the products Kugisaki had bought you for your birthday.

“I know your trying,” you said into his shoulder, “and I love that you’re letting your walls down for me. I’ll wait for you to open up for me, I don’t care how long it takes. I want to know everything about you, I want to love everything about you. Take as long as you need, I’ll still be here. I promise.”

The two of you stayed in your embrace. You felt your heart pounding in your ears as you awaited his reply, hoping you didn’t take it too far.

He gently kissed your collarbone, knocking both of you over so you laid on the blanket. You quietly yelped upon impact, not expecting the action.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. You smiled, readjusting your position so you faced him. You wrapped your arms around him, running your hands through his black hair.

“You smell so good,” he said suddenly, making you laugh. “I love the way you smell.”

You thanked him, feeling your eyes droop. You snapped them open, hoping to stay awake just a little longer, hoping you would be able to spend just a few more seconds with Fushiguro in this moment.

Alas, you fell asleep, but not before you quietly said, “I love you, Megumi,” into his hair.

He smiled at your words, repeating them before he realized you were already fast asleep. He grabbed a blanket from nearby, throwing it over the two of you as he admired your sleeping face before he dozed off as well.

—

You awoke the next morning to a blinding light being shone in your face, followed by the shutter of a camera. You groaned, opening your eyes and yawning before seeing what was happening.

It was no surprise when you saw Gojo, accompanied by Kugisaki and Itadori, standing above you and your still sleeping boyfriend.

“Oops, I forgot to turn off flash,” Gojo said.

You rolled your eyes before closing them again, resuming your previous sleeping position and closing your eyes. “Leave us alone,” you muttered.

You felt Fushiguro stir next to you, assuming he was awake when he let out an exasperated breath.

“See, we would leave you alone. However the second years need to train and you two love bugs are lying in the middle of the field.”

You groaned, forcing yourself to sit up along with Fushiguro. You shooed the other three away as you started picking up your things with your boyfriend, stacking the blankets and taking them from Fushiguro’s grasp as you stood. He followed suit, and the two of you ignored your classmates and teacher as you walked towards the dorms.

“We don’t have anything to do today, right?” you asked.

Fushiguro nodded. “It’s just a day off.”

You hummed in acknowledgment. “I think I’m just gonna go back to sleep, then.”

Fushiguro took hold of one of your hands, the one that wasn’t carrying the blankets. “Do you mind if I join you?”

You let out a fake, exaggerated gasp. “A boy in my dorm? How scandalous, don’t you think?” He chuckled, shaking his head slightly. “Of course you can. I’d love it if you did.”

He smiled at you, continuing the walk to your dorm. Upon entering, you plopped the blankets down in a random area o the floor, continuing to drag Fushiguro onto the bed and under your covers.

“Sorry, it’s kind of a mess,” you said as the two of you readjusted yourselves. “I’m normally the only one that comes in here.”

“It’s fine,” he whispered, kissing the crown of your head. “Just go to sleep.”

You nodded against his shoulder. “I love you.”

He smiled into your hair. “I love you, too.”

And the two of you would continue saying that. At every chance you got. You would never allow the other to forget that fact for as long as you lived.

This was a late birthday present for one of my friends. Anyways as i was writing I was seriously debating turning the fic in a different direction and going down an angst route. I don’t know I might add a part two to this or something because I do have ideas.

Idk what do y’all think?

Also this was copy and pasted from my notes app so I apologize if it doesn’t look right 💀

[musiccgor3]

Gonna ramble about a movie I watched because it ended up far more interesting than I thought, and reminded me of a few things. It has some spoilers tho so (long ass post....)

It's kinda like Dead Poets Society, but if it was set in ww2 nazi boarding school for history buffs

Я убейся бля. It reminded me so much of dps. The scenes, the characters, legit everything with just a few changes here and there. I honestly just viewed Friedrich and Albrecht as best friends, but some people apparently see them as romantic interests, and honestly, I can't even argue with that. A few scenes felt like it. Still, no matter what your views on them are, it's still pretty devastating.

It also kinda hit close to home, which may be a weird thing to say for a film with nazis ☠️, BUT I meant specifically how the school and teachers acted and Friedrich's roommates. Obviously, it's not as comparable. Napolas were literally teaching teens to kill, but it reminded me just a tiny bit, k??? The strict ass teachers, and don't even get me started on the humiliating punishment. That one scene with the instructor and shit reminded me of my own teacher. Whenever we failed a test or quiz, he'd make us chew the paper and spit it out. We'd also get hit sometimes in front of everyone, among other things.

Another thing it reminded me was my friend. I think one of the main reasons I mainly viewed them as friends was because I might have been projecting from how much Albrecht reminded me of a friend lmfao. This shit is very personal but well whatever. It was mostly their personalities. He was also reserved, kinda soft spoken and quiet, like Albrecht. He had some family issues, mainly with his dad, and because of his personality, he wasn't severely bullied or anything, more like outcasted and ignored by the others. I was the only one he actually talked to casually without purpose, so I suppose being his only friend, I kinda influenced him too and vice versa (since it was also a pretty shitty time in my life where I was a bit stupid lol). He really stood with what he thought. Friedrich and Albrecht were like mirrors to me, almost. But unfortunately, too much alike. Due to some stuff happening, I also ended up losing him to suicide. I wasn't even able to attend his funeral, so the scene where Friedrich requested an obituary and they refused to give Albrecht a funeral in the school???? Ouch. And I also already felt a bit guilty with what happened, so when that fuck said the parents blamed Friedrich to be partially responsible for Albrecht's death, uhh, double ouch. It got me thinking a bit.

I'd be lying if I said I don't miss him bad, but shit, enough of that. I rambled about it wayy too much.

Yeah, this movie is great as hell. Not only is it a good film, but it'll probably hold an important place in my brain. I'm gonna think about this for the next week thx. Super cool movie. There should be more films where they allow guys to have more emotional relationships than just "oh, I'm super masculine. I don't care about others." Yeah, most of us are raised to be more emotionally reserved and probably cant be affectionate for shit with friends or let alone anyone, but don't lie when you say you haven't atleast had one friendship where you let go for once damn. "Bromance" or not, some ppl need to learn how to care. You can be masculine and still care for your friends deeply, ya know.

This movie might have some intentional or unintentional homoeroticism in it, but эххххх whatever.... Gay or not, we can all agree it's depressing in both ways someone can view it

(Just realized I probably liked this film due to more personal reasons than a cinematic view LMAO)

[aleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee]

The Firsts + Cloud each get a singular dinosaur as a pet, what do they get and what do they do with it? (I’m sorry this needs to come out into the light after seeing that one poll)

I definitely haven't been waiting for this my whole life as a future paleontologist hahaha...

(I will add images because there's a lot of UNCULTURED people who don't know anything about dinosaurs and the pictures from Jurassic world are NOT what they actually looked like./lh)

Genesis: he would like sauropods, but not the ones that are as big as a damn mountain, he would like the tiny ones(which are like 1,50 meters long and 6 meters tall). I would give him the tiniest one known until now, Europasaurus.

I feel like he would give it a big ass garden with trees and fruit and everything it needs, it's like his third most precious possession after his loveless copy and himself/hj

Sephiroth: he's uhh.... Weird. I would give him a Spinosaurus. Not only because of the vibes, but also because paleontologist have no fucking clue about most things about them. There's a big discussion happening in the paleontologist fandom™(/j) about whether the spinosaurus lived in water or earth. At first it was earth, yet a random Canadian decided they actually lived on water thanks to their similarities to cocodriles and reptiles similar to them, besides also having a long tail that could've been a fin. In my opinion, I believe on what some people say about spinosaurus actually living on both. There's also something cool that the big spine on their back was supposed to change colors depending on the Spinosaurus' body temperature, and they needed to get into the water to cool down.

Also, they eat fish. And fish = cats. And cats = Sephiroth

I feel like he would just... Stare at it. I don't know. And I'm pretty sure he doesn't know what to do with it either.

Angeal: I'm sorry I don't know much about him. I feel like he would have a Triceratops just because of the vibes. Another alternative is a Pachycephalosauria, they have a hard head and are very silly, I feel like he would find them amusing (as well as also similar to Zack).

No matter what option is, he would take proper care of them as if he was the one to give birth to the dinosaur.

Zack: As a child I feel like Zack would've had T-Rex's as his favorite dinosaurs because he saw them in movies and toys and thought they were really cool. Yet, after watching the documentary/movie "Walking with dinosaurs" his favorite is the Pachyrhinosaurus. And I would give him that one.

He would probably do his best to take care of it without ending with his house completely destroyed and would buy matching hats/sweaters for them to wear. Also he would ride it as if it was a chocobo.

Cloud: at first I was thinking a Stegosaurus simply because of vibes, yet I'm going more with a Parasaurolophus. They're just chill chunky guys and I feel like Cloud wouldn't want to have any more problems added to his life.

Yet, they're too big... So another option I thought for Cloud are Velociraptors. And no, they look nothing like the ones in movies. They are AT BEST 0,5 meters tall(50cm), and they also have feathers. It would be like having a little Chocobo who wouldn't hesitate a second to eat you as soon as you're unconscious... But let's pretend this one is actually friendly and sees Cloud as family. Okay? Okay.

[im-in-love-with-99-demons-again]

HELLO!! hi uh can I request something? I see you have it open so..... Could do some Genshin impact x reader, how they would react if s/o prank them by saying she was pregnant?? Of Scaramouche, Childe, Venti, Xiao, Aether Diluc, Albedo, .....plz

you also don't have to do all of them! But i would really want Scaramouche if possible?

hope you have a wonderful day/night <3

Hello!! YES!! of course, i'll do them all don't worry! like said, i'll literally write anything..... Okay so....uhh...yea some may be longer then others.

I see that you have DMed me that you wanted some drama on some....i'll try and if you don't like it tell me so that i can make it better!! it will not hurt my feelings.

T/w: Cursing, some sexual themed stuff...not too bad actually.

Scaramouche

Okay....so first off is how the hell did you even get in a relationship with this narcissistic ass-

you planned this prank with Childe cuz you both epic 😎 sorry I meant only you are epic. You slowly walked over to Scaramouche as he was getting ready to leave (cuz he had some important stuff to take care of🫠) "Scara!"

You called out to your partner as he only gave a side glare before responding with an irritated tone "What now?" you smiled and looked down trying not to laugh as you pretended to be shy.....wait you actually were but still you continued. "i....I'm....uhh.....remember two weeks ago we had.......uhh-" He interrupted you with a eyebrow raised

"Sex? yeah, I remember. Now hurry up, what about it?I have to go soon." 'OMG He's blunt!!' you thought to yourself, meanwhile Childe in the background being ignored. "Y-Yeah..."

"Yeah?" he repeated but he looked away this time because he was losing interest in the conversation. "I'm pregnant...and your the father"....silence was in the air, he even stooped moving well until he turned his head to the side to look you in the eye.

"Well no shit i'll be the father unless you're cheating on me? but I highly doubt that...because if you did you'll only have a chance with Childe..bwahaha your kid would be dumber then a rock let alone-" You cut him off before he went on a complete different subject.

"So i'm keeping it" his glare got even more angrier not only did you interrupt him....but you are now pregnant and he doesn't want it "Then you can leave, I don't want anything to do with that baby of yours, goodbye-"

With that he started to walk away, surprised but not really because you kinda expected him to respond like that. "It's a prank you dumbass!!"

"Well then you can stay." He said not looking back but a tiny part of him kinda did want you to be pregnant....seeing you all plumped up with the baby he put in you knowing he did a damn good job at it too, just made him a little 😏 he may have a breeding kink and also a get the fuck out and don't pay child support kink too 😭

----------- next----------------------------------------------------------<3-

Childe

He was out in about saving the traveler from Zhongli spending all their mora but as he was once again done with him randomly appearing and disappearing from the traveler he sat near the edge of a rock looking down at Liyue, you slowly came behind him and took a seat next to him. He glanced over before looking back down at Liyue. "Um..I have something to tell you" you stared, he gave a hmm sound as a response which you took the opportunity to go on with your prank. "I'm...I'm pregnant..." he froze as if he had seen a ghost, slowly he turned his head to you "You're telling the truth right?" You smiled and responded with a yes wanting to see what he'll say.

He lips curved into a big smile before he got up and pulled you with him, spinning you in the air not to harsh tho (gently) before softly placing you down and giving a BIG hug (then a small kiss, lol) "I'm so happy to hear that!! I wonder what we are gonna name them??!! Is it a girl?? a boy?? Will they look like me?? or you?? Oh I hope if they are a girl they look like you!! and if they are a bo-" You had to stop him from continuing (cuz it was too far now lol) and blurted the first words that came out of your mouth "It's not yours....." he stopped almost immediately.

You just then realized what you have said and tried to talk before he so rudely left you 🤓 later that day you found him trying to pick a fight with Scaramouche saying why he got u pregnant, Scaramouche was super annoyed and didn't really give a flying damn what he was saying but remember kids...he's an ass so he played along

"So what? you got so worked up for a girl who wasn't even faithful to you and now you're mad at me all cuz s/o liked me better...you had all the chances to make that child yours or is my seed better then yours too?" LMAO anywho Childe, he saw you and glared as he left once again. Scaramouche glared at you and also left (uhh yeah he likes you now....but you got a traumatized Childe 🩷) You ended up finding Childe sitting in a dark ally (LOL) "Get over it! It was a damn prank!!"

"How can I know that for sure" You looked at him and sighed. "You can wait 9 mouth and see that no baby and no baby bump?" He looked at you and said "nah...I'm gonna prove my seed is better!!" You backed away as he started to get up and run to you (YUP have fun!!)

...........----------.............------------.........----0-0.......(0_0)/ ----------------

Albedo

He was up at dragonspine doing some weird shit you were just sitting there watching him and also planning something....yes planning something but not alone!

Klee was there right next to you! (LOL) anywho you got the courage to go up and do it with Klee as your support. "We have important news!" Klee says before you take over seeing as Albedo looked at both of you before looking back at his projects "Well it's good news for us all.....i'm pregnant!"

you said with a big smile and Klee was jumping saying she was so happy that she was gonna be a big sister (Cute) he stooped his movement exactly what you wanted but what happened next you did not expect.

"Oh so you do know? huh strange...I was able to find out easily but still...how? I was sure I couldn't impregnate you but I did...(he looked your way and smiled) I'm extremely happy" Shock....that was all.....you...were actually...pregnant?!

on cue both you and Klee screamed "WHAT!?" he laughed.

"What did you think I was working on? I did take some blood samples and stuff because I was shock that you were pregnant, at first I thought you may have cheated on me but I know you wouldn't....i'll run more tests once the baby is born"

Still in shock you nodded but you were somewhat happy to hear that...finally your guys family will have another member! He ended up asking you a lot of questions but not too much so you don't stress out, but once the baby was born (It was a boy 🫶lol)

you named him (son's name) he had Albedo's eyes and your hair and a fair mix between yours and his skin, the baby had his nose and your lips (CUTE) Albedo ran one more test but on the baby, you and him and there it was....his DNA was flowing in (son's name) Some tears fell down his face(Happy btw) he was so happy yet surprised but he still doesn't know how it happened....maybe you guys are just destined to be (FR)

(does he have DNA...yes..)

-------------------------------------(U_U)/-------------------------------<3

Aether

Aether just came back from one of his missions and he planned to cook something for Paimon and you (and of course himself) You and Paimon where sitting together under a tree and talking as Aether was cooking and a thought popped in your head as you gasped (So did Paimon)

"Did you just think what I thought?" you said looking at Paimon she smiled and responded "To prank Aether!-" She yelled you covered her mouth as Aether turned around seeing as he heard his name be called out "Yeah?" "Oh nothing, go on keep cooking! it smells delicious😅"

he smiled awkwardly and went back to cooking. You turned back to Paimon, "Keep it down or i'll turn you into emergency food right now!!" You whisper yelled as you remove your hand from her mouth. "You're so mean🤧" she pouted, You laughed a little as you continued. "Okay, I was thinking on pranking him by saying I'm pregnant? what do you think about it?" she didn't look satisfied with that.

"Hmm it doesn't sound like a good prank...it sounds lame" She said crossing her arms, but you knew she'd react like this so you smirked and said. "Well look at it this way, If he believes me we would get more delicious food, and you like food right?? so..." she looked up to think then looked back at you. "Okay but I wanna chose the food!" "Okay"

You said as you laughed. Getting up from the floor you headed to your boyfriend and tapped his shoulder, he looked at you with a confused face.

"Yes?"

"I have something to tell you" You said as you tried to look more serious, he saw that and stood up straight as he faced you completely seeing as you had something important to say "..I'm...pregnant...and you're the father.." Shock took over, he was frozen with his mouth a gap and staring at you as if you had just vanished. "Aether?....You there-?"

"You're pregnant??!!" he randomly shouted still pretty shocked, you wanting to continue this so you responded. "Yes" He closes his eyes for a bit as he put his head down a bit and put his hand on his chin in a thinking position.

"......"-Aether,

"......."-you.

Aether took his sweet time thinking about something when out of nowhere he says

"Then who's the father?" You were token aback but answered nonetheless. "You, who else would be the father?...I already told you" He looked at you straight in the eyes.

"But we hadn't had...intercourse for a while now....and I mean like a couple of mouths.....you couldn't have just found out now without it already being visible....and you don't look pregnant....yet" Shit you should have thought this threw!!!!!

"I...uh.....umm...we did...you were just....drunk! yeah you were drunk" "Hmmm I don't recall being drunk or even having any...?.....are...you..cheating on me?" Welp guess you had to tell him now.....or he would think you were unfaithful to him🤦 should have thought this plan threw.

"Okay looks like you caught me, this was suppose to be a joke that I trick you that i'm pregnant but I didn't think it threw. Plus I would never cheat!" He laughs awkwardly "Well uhh that good to hear that you didn't cheat.....but I think it would be nice to have a mini us😁...Would you like to tr-"

"Oh no look!!! the FOOD!!!" Paimon says as the pot of food overflows and burns into the fire below. "Noooo My food!!!😭" You cried out with Paimon as Aether tried to fix it, a little part of him might wanna spend more time with you in a different way 😏 so that next time you tell him it won't have to be a prank nor will he think you cheated (He wouldn't truly believe that you would cheat on him tho)

------------> \(C_C)/ <----------------> <----> <-------> <----------> <------>

Venti

You where walking Venti home after his drinking party when you suddenly came up with an idea. The Idea was that you were going to tell him that you have became pregnant and that you would like if he could spend more time with you as well with try and not spend all your mora on wine!! like sure he could still drink it but not literally get you in debt!!!.

You got inside your home as Venti kept hiccuping talking random stuff, you laid him down on the couch and went to get a glass of water and went back to set it on the coffee table that was next to the couch that he was laid on. "Venti...I have to tell you something important and that is that I am....Pregnant.."

right as you said that the whole room fell silent, even his hiccups stopped as if he got scared (LOL) "Is that true, love..." that was what broke the silence you nodded as you looked down at the glass of water on the table. "I'M SO HAPPY!!!! COME HERE!!" He said as he ran to you and wrapped his arms around you tight but gentle.

you kinda felt bad that this was a prank but you went along with it......little did you know that you were gonna actually be pregnant (LOL) I mean once you found out as your tummy (Yes I used tummy...It's cute, lol) was getting bigger and you where feeling sick as well kicks from inside.

Venti was over the moon and would not stop talking to them and would always want to have his hand on your stomach because it makes him feel happy .. but before you knew you were pregnant you ended up telling Venti right after he was done hugging you that it was a prank.

His smile left so fast but he managed to smile again as an idea popped in his head.....yeah that's why you later found out you were pregnant.....he def did that nasty with ya (LOL😅)

-------------(^o^)--r ' ' ' <-----------------------------------> <------------->

Diluc

Diluc was about finished with drying some of the wine glasses and you were getting bored, well that was until Kaeya came up with a stupid prank (🤡) The prank was that you tell Diluc that you were pregnant but he wasn't the father but instead it was Kaeya.

(Stupid right) Well you decided to do it and the fact that you guys have been doing the nasty a bit more often (Idk why..make a reason why) which made it much more likely for you to be pregnant ...right? Well anyway you called Diluc over and started the prank as Kaeya watched from a bit away.

"I have something important to tell you...." Diluc looked your way as he placed a wine glass down and made eye contact giving you his full attention to you.

"Well, to put it out bluntly...i'm pregnant..." you said taking a quick look at Kaeya to which he moved his hand in a swaying way gesturing for you to continue on with the prank, you looked back at Diluc who was wide eyed and frozen like a statue. "When did...you find out?..." Diluc's voice was soft and quite.

"Not to long ago.....but there something else that you need to know....." Kaeya smirking in the background waiting patently for the surprise, Diluc raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms looking at you and completely forgetting his brothers presence. He was a bit shocked but he had to have seen it coming from all the intimacy you guys have been doing but you had something else to say...did you not want the unborn child?

Did you want to leave him and keep the child?....Or.......was the child.....not his.

That was something he did not want, nor did he want to lose you, of course he'd respect your decisions about the child but....."You are not the father.."

Those words seem to replay over a thousand times in his head before anger took over then sadness. "th-then who is" He forced himself to ask a question he might have not wanted to know..but still he feels like he has some rights to know..right?

You looked over at Kaeya once more not really wanting to continue, all he did was smile and wave you to continue. "....it's someone you know....." You wanted to just get it over with but you couldn't say his name. Diluc was now anxious, it was someone he knew...but who would do something like that- "Someone I know...who?" He asked again this time wanting the answer clear and hoping that it was just a prank...tho he would scold you about this one if it was a prank(which it is) "It's.....Kaeya..."

Diluc was angry but did not show it, he didn't want to do anything in front of you but.....it was a bad time for Kaeya to be right behind him. He turned and was met with a smirking Kaeya (Btw background, they both liked you and ended up competing for your love and you ended up choosing Diluc) Diluc stared at him for a while before he said. "Step outside....we need to talk..."

was all he said before he started to head to the doors but before he got outside you grabbed his arm and told him the truth. "HAHA you fell for it!! I'm not pregnant and I wouldn't cheat on you with some one eye'd flirt boy!! how rude of you to think i'll go out with him!😅" You said trying to sound happy funny tone, you saw that Diluc let out a sigh of relief.

He was happy to know that it was just a prank but he ended up telling you how that wasn't very funny and whoever came up with it must have been as dumb as Kaeya (Oh wait..it was Kaeya...no hate to him, lol)

Oh yeah Kaeya def got offended by the nickname you gave him.

<----------> <--------->(~_~;)/no good <-------> <--------> <----------> <-->

Xiao

You were cooking one of your boyfriends favorite foods and you were also thinking on how to prank him, something that would make him shocked and hopefully not angry. As you grabbed a plate to put the food in an idea popped in your head as you said "Perfect".

How about you prank him by faking that you're pregnant, smirking at your prank you quickly made a plate of the food and sat it down on the table. After setting the plate of food down you walked over to the balcony that overlooked Liyue, breathing in the fresh air you softly smiled before you spoke his name.

"Xiao you little bitc-" (JK u just called his name🙏) after you said that only moments later he arrived right in front of you, he just stared at you for a bit before he smelled the food, you noticed that and said. "Oh yeah I cooked some of your favorite....it's on the table"

He nodded and started to head in you fallowed behind him. His eyes lit up once he saw what you had made for him, he sat down and thanked you before he started eating.

"I have something to tell you......i'm pregnant.."

He stopped eating and almost chocked, his eyes wide and his mouth full of food. He slightly looked over at you before he chewed the food in his mouth and swallowed it. "what do you mean?..."

you smiled seeing as your plan is working out, you went over to him and grabbed one of his hands and placed it on you stomach and placing yours on top of his, a slight shade of red covered his face...."I...I...I have to go.."

he said before he vanished....surprised and kinda disappointed that you didn't even get to say sike and that it was all a prank.....You sighed walking back to the balcony.

"It was a prank....i'm not pregna-" he reappeared but this time he just picked you up and took you to your shared bedroom........UM!!!....yes he was kinda disappointed that you were lying but he was also kinda token aback and didn't know if he was ready or not, he didn't want anything bad to happen to you and the baby if you were pregnant......but now he made his mind up 😏..(yes and quick)

(JKJK PLZ DON'T KILL ME)

----------------------------------------(UvU)// yay--------------------------

YESIR PLZ you were the first person to ask!!😭 THANK YOU!!! SO MUCH!! I'll literally write anything 😎

[chelseeebe]

don’t you (forget about me)

summary: being forced along to hawkins every summer had always been a drag. but then you meet the doe eyed boy slinging ice cream at the mall and summer changes for the better. but was it destined to stay a summer fling?

wheeler!femreader x steve, we’re gonna pretend steve n nancy weren’t that serious in this ok.

ONE singular use of y/n (bc it is damn near impossible to introduce people without saying their name!!)

a/n my god i’ve been loving the family member x steve lately haven’t i :o already started an angsttyyy part 2 for this.. think taylor come back.. be here angst ;)

you’d always hated getting dragged to hawkins for the summer. it was boring and the people were.. weird.

the only redeeming factor was getting to stay with your cousins, whom you loved.

especially nancy.

she was only a year younger than you but so obviously influenced by everything you did, from the way you styled your hair to how you spoke, showing her new slang from the city.

plus, getting to team up and bully mike was an added bonus.

this summer was going to be different though, nancy had found a job with her new boyfriend at the local paper, leaving you all alone.

she’d begged for the day off when you’d arrived, taking you to the new mall that had opened up in the tiny town, starcourt.

it was all very bright and always bustling, full of kids on their summer vacation.

maybe you could hang out here this summer, at least there was air conditioning.

nancy tries to drag you into the stationary store but you point blank refuse, knowing just how long she’d take, obsessing over paper quality and ink flow.

i’m gonna go get ice cream,’ nodding over to the sailor themed shop, ‘please, don’t be hours in there.’

she drops your hand, flashing you a cheeky grin before rushing into the dull store.

you sigh, walking into the ice cream parlour, preparing for the hour long wait you were about to face.

trundling over to the counter, you can see a boy dressed in sailors gear arguing with another similarly dressed girl, perched on the ledge.

she nods towards you, ‘do your thing, harrington.’

he spins on his heel to face you, an enthusiastic smile on his lips, ‘hi! what brings you here today?’

you stare back, slightly bewildered, ‘uhh.. ice cream?’

he leans forward, hands resting on the counter, ‘yeah, we sell ice cream,’ he nods towards the display.

you nod slightly, raising your brows, ‘right.. well, can i order?’

you weren’t sure if he was always a bumbling idiot or if this store was actually a front for some illegal business and he’d forgotten what to actually do.

‘yes! of course,’ he fumbles with the ice cream scoop tucked into his short pocket, not once breaking eye contact.

you smile, honestly out of sheer joy in watching him and his odd movements.

‘just chocolate, please,’ nodding to him.

he doesn’t move, still gazing into your eyes, mouth slightly parted with the remnants of his smile.

the girl behind him clears her throat and he’s kickstarted into action, finally breaking away from your eyes and grabbing a cone.

you stare, mostly in awe, unsure if this was his attempt at flirting with you or if he was generally just.. like this.

he hands you the cone, attempting to flip the ice cream scooper but failing miserably, a loud clattering of metal sounds as it hits the tiled floor.

the other sailor bursts out with laughter, slapping her knee as he bends down, retrieving his scoop and putting it back on the counter with a small sigh.

you bite down onto your bottom lip, wanting to stifle your laughter as his cheeks flush red.

‘thanks..’ you nod, giving him a half-smile.

his eyes meet yours again, not as bright as once before but you can still see the fervour in his eyes.

‘yeah.. enjoy, come back anytime,’ he says, finding his smile once more.

you grin back, walking out of the store, questioning what the fuck had just happened.

‘nice one dingus! that went really well,’ she muses, raising her eyebrows as steve cringes away.

‘just.. shut up,’ he doesn’t even fight back, knowing just how terribly that went.

‘oh.. and that’ll be a buck fifty.. you didn’t charge her,’ she giggles, making it all much funnier.

he just groans, reaching into his pocket to retrieve his wallet, placing the bills into the machine.

he stares out of the door, unable to shake the image of your smile from his head, cursing himself for being such a dork.

-

although steve had longed for it, you don’t come back into the store the next day. or the day after that.

‘look, robin..’ he sighs, ‘there was something different about her, i could feel it.. in my bones,’ he explains to his coworker.

‘oh my god,’ she groans, ‘you’ve said that about near enough every girl that walks through that door.’

‘no, no.. i’m right about this one,’ he reiterates.

in fact, you hadn’t really left his mind at all.

the fact you hadn’t laughed at him and the genuine, sincere smile on your face as he massively embarrassed himself played over and over again.

‘i think you need to get over it,’ robin rolls her eyes, swinging out her legs over the counter and hopping into the background.

steve just shakes his head, turning back to his post, he’d shot gunned being front of store all day, just in case you came in again.

-

it’s the end of the week before you’re back at the mall, this time on your own.

mike was almost disgusting when you'd asked him to join you, he was too old and far too cool to hang out with you.

you debate going back into the ice cream shop, wanting to see the strange but beautiful brown-eyed boy again.

well, fuck it. if anything, you’d have another funny story and some ice cream.

you sidle into the shop and the ginger girl from the other day looks up, a slightly shocked expression on her face.

she reaches over to ding the bell, ‘hey steve, might wanna get out here,’ she yells through the back.

‘i’m on my break! you can do it,’ he calls back.

you stand, bemused at their exchange, had he been speaking about you?

she raises a finger, telling you to wait and spins to lean through the window, ‘just get out here,’ rolling her eyes.

the boy sighs, walking through the swinging door with a half-eaten sandwich in his hand, crumbs all over his blue uniform.

‘look robin, when i’m on my bre-,’ his eyes slowly meet yours and you raise your eyebrows in faux shock.

he smiles, placing his sandwich down on the counter and brushing himself off.

‘hey! i was waiting for you to come back.. well, not waiting but- just,’ he gives up, ‘ice cream?’

‘oh really? you were waiting?’ you grin, squinting at him.

‘every damn day,’ the girl who’s name you’d learnt was robin adds, ‘like a lil’ puppy.’

he elbows her as she walks into the back room, giggling to herself.

‘don’t listen to her, i was just.. hoping you’d come back, kinda embarrassed myself last time.. had to show you my scooping skills,’ he beams, gripping onto the scooper.

‘riight,’ you nod, ‘well, let’s see em’,’ watching him intently.

‘chocolate?’

‘please.’

he’s slightly smoother this time, not so visibly nervous at least.

‘i don’t think i introduced myself.. my name’s steve, professional ice cream scooper,’ he winks and you giggle in response, finally learning mystery boy’s name.

he goes to hand over the cone before quickly bringing it back towards him, ‘ahh.. well, the thing is.. you can have the ice cream, but i’m gonna need something from you.’

you tilt your head slightly, you’d realised once you’d left the shop that he hadn’t charged you but you didn’t he’d care.

‘okay, what’s that?’ you humour him.

‘a date, with me.. obviously,’ he smirks slightly, the ice cream still hovering in the air.

‘hmmm.. isn’t this like.. blackmail or something?’ you joke, though maybe not so obviously as his face drops.

‘oh, no no.. i was just-,’

‘i’m joking,’ you nod assuringly, ‘sure, i’ll go on a date with you,’ smiling at him.

‘wait, really?’ he looks almost shocked at your willingness.

robin sits up and you can see her head pop up in the window, a completely shocked expression on her face.

‘yes,’ you laugh, ‘but i would like my ice cream,’ you point at the already melting ice cream still in his hand.

he looks at the cone and then back at you, ‘right!’ finally handing over the ice cream, ‘you really wanna go out?’ he has to ask again.

‘yes, but if you ask again i’ll change my mind,’ you say, licking the dripping ice cream.

‘wow.. okay, okay.. tomorrow? i’m off work at like six..’

‘yeah sounds good, i’m up on maple.. big white door, pick me up at seven.. i’ll be waiting,’ you confirm.

‘okay, yeah..yeah,’ he stares back, his mouth slightly open, ‘i don’t even.. i haven’t even asked you for your name.. how rude.’

‘y/n,’ giving him a small smile, beginning to back out of the store, ‘seven sharpish, i don’t like waiting,’ you add before leaving.

it’s awful and you can’t help it but you’re blushing.

he’d been waiting for you.

you can’t ignore the giddy feeling in your stomach.

-

‘so.. i’m going on a date tomorrow,’ you add, sprawled out your front on nancy’s bed.

‘what? you didn’t think to tell me sooner?’ her eyes widen, a small grin on her face.

‘well it only happened today.. i wasn’t gonna call you at work,’ you laugh, placing the half-read magazine on the bed to give her your full attention.

she prods you with her finger, ‘tell me all about it..’ crossing her legs and sitting up.

‘well.. he works in the mall, and he said he waited for me to come back, you know i told you about that boy completely embarrassing himself,’ you chuckle, remembering back to your first encounter.

‘oh my god, that’s so cute.. what’s his name?’ she questions, bright-eyed and genuinely excited for you.

‘steve.. he works in that ice cream store,’ you nod excitedly.

her face falls slightly and you pick up on it, straight away.

‘what? what was that face for?’

she shakes her head, ‘no.. it’s not- it doesn’t matter.’

‘nancy,’ you sit up properly, now in-level with her.

she purses her lips together, ‘well.. you remember that boyfriend i had.. last year? that’s him..’ she looks back at you, also slightly in shock.

‘that’s steve? oh nance.. i’m sorry, i didn’t even realise.. i won’t go,’ you apologise, reaching over to hold her hand.

‘no no no, oh my god no, i don’t care.. go, it’s just..’ her lips twitch slightly, ‘it’s kinda funny,’ she cracks up, giggling.

you stare at her for a moment until her infectious laugh catches on and you start giggle too.

‘it’s not that funny,’ you say through laughter.

‘i can’t believe that weird boy you were telling me about is steve,’ she says, calming herself from her giggles.

you chuckle, getting back into your comfortable position on her bed, ‘are you sure you’re okay with me going?’

‘i am positive, go have fun,’ she reassures you with a smile.

‘okay,’ you nod, grinning up at your crazy-haired cousin.

-

on the drive over; steve had racked his brain trying to figure out why the big white door on maple street rang a bell but couldn’t figure it out.

not until you walked out of the wheeler’s house and it had all clicked.

his face a picture as you walk over.

you gave him a small wave before getting into the car, smoothing out your skirt as you sit down.

‘did you.. did you just come out of that house?’ he points over to the large house, a confused expression taking over his features.

you chuckle, nodding, ‘yeah.. nancy’s told me a lot about you,’ you add, staring into his widened eyes as his face drops.

‘wait.. i’m confused.. is this a prank?’ he asks, still none-the-wiser.

you burst out into a laugh, ‘no, oh my god.. i’m nancy’s cousin.. if this is too weird, i completely understand.’

he’s finally on the same page, the look of understanding clear on his face, ‘no.. it’s not, is it?’

‘i don’t think so, nancy didn’t seem to care,’ you shrug, watching as the cogs turn in his brain.

‘okay well, i don’t care either.. do you?’

‘hmm.. nope,’ shaking your head.

‘okay.. good,’ he nods, a small smile emerging, finally finding the humour in the situation.

‘good,’ you reiterate, pulling the seatbelt around you.

he starts the car, still somewhat confused yet amused by it all.

‘you’re.. oh my god, you’re from cincinnati .. shit, how did i not..’ he laughs, clicking his fingers.

‘oh? you already know me?’ you ask, turning to face him.

‘oh yeah, god.. nancy did not shut up about this amazing cousin from out of town, i can finally see what all the hype’s about,’ he raises his brows, clutching onto the steering wheel.

‘well,’ you grin, flattered by your cousin’s obvious love for you, ‘i hope i don’t disappoint.’

‘you’re already well over my expectations of you.. if that helps,’ he glances over before quickly looking back to the road.

‘that’s good to know,’ you smile to yourself, stomach doing flips at his words.

‘don’t get big-headed now.. let’s see how i feel after the date and then i’ll decide,’ he jokes, giving you a small side-smirk.

he was.. calmer outside of work, not so flustered and a whole lot more comfortable around you.

you put it down to those tight, bright blue shorts.. must’ve been cutting off the circulation to his brain.

-

‘that’s a lot to remember,’ he nods, you’re sat on the grass at the edge of the fair, leaning back on your hand as you take a handful of the cotton candy steve was holding.

‘no it’s not,’ you protest, ‘super easy.. actually,’ you say, biting into the fluffy treat.

‘okay.. so, your mom and dad got divorced.. your dad is mr. wheeler’s brother-,’

‘technically my dad is also mr. wheeler.. but carry on,’ you giggle, motioning for him to continue.

he glares at you with a small smile, face illuminated by the flashing neon lights of the fairground rides, ‘anyway.. mr.wheeler is your uncle.. you don’t speak to your dad much anymore but.. you and your mom still visit every summer..’

you nod along, ‘see, told you it was easy,’ you grin back.

‘that was anything but easy, i put a hundred percent of my brain power into that,’ he chuckles, ripping off a piece of cotton candy.

‘god, your poor little brain,’ you jest, mockingly pouting at him.

he shakes his head rather endearingly, ‘how come i never saw you? i was at the wheeler’s like.. every day last summer.’

you seethe, ‘we couldn’t come last year.. someone failed math and had to do summer school or they wouldn’t graduate,’ you shrug, looking at the obviously intoxicated passer-by.

‘ahh.. so you’re not very good at math then?’ he jokes, prodding your side with his sharp elbow.

‘i never said that someone was me.. but no.. awful at it,’ you laugh, meeting his gaze again.

he just smiles back at you, eyes searching the entirety of your face, you notice as he takes his bottom lip between his teeth.

‘what?’ you laugh breathlessly, shaking your head at his stare.

his gaze drops to your lips briefly before meeting your eyes, ‘i really wanna kiss you,’ he breathes.

‘okay,’ you reply, it comes out as a whisper, giddy at his words.

he’s still resting his weight on his hand as he leans over, weight now unbalanced, the dewy grass slips between his fingers as he practically collapses on top of you and the stick of cotton candy going flying as he just about catches himself before he crushes you.

you stare up at him, eyes-widened at his utter failure to be smooth, giggling in his face as he holds himself up now just inches above you.

‘the cotton candy,’ you pout, turning your head to look at the discarded pink fluff.

his hand reaches up to touch your cheek, moving your head to look back at him, smiling as his lips finally reach yours.

suddenly, the obnoxiously loud carnival music and the screams of riders go silent, a show of muted colours flash behind your closed eyes, the feel of his body on top of yours.

he pulls back slightly, smirking, ‘i totally meant to do that.’

you giggle once more, ‘smooth,’ your arms move to wrap around his neck, tangled into his already outstretched arms.

he pauses for just a second before locking his lips to yours again, his smile incredibly evident through the kiss.

his hand still cradles your face, the mixture of his cologne, fried foods and gasoline fills your nose and you smile back, the kiss becoming a clash of teeth and breathy laughs.

summer might not be so boring after all.

-

you would never, ever normally be the one to chase a man after a date but there was something about steve, something about last night that had flipped the switch.

you didn’t wanna have to wait for him to call.. eighteen hours was already long enough.

besides, your mom and karen had gone for their annual mother’s retreat, meaning day-drinking and shit-talking and anything was better than being stuck at home with ted.

so you traipse into the mall, making a beeline for the ice cream shop, ignoring the pushy salesman grabbing at you.

normally, your heart would be in your throat.. not wanting to initiate things but you felt confident strolling through the walkway.

you’d sat at the carnival field for hours, even after they’d shut down all of the rides, cascaded in moonlight as he rambled on about his dad, telling you all about high school and his ‘golden days’ as he’d called it.

when he’s eventually dropped you off, hours after you should’ve been back, he leant over the centre console of his car with the cheesiest grin on his face and kissed you one last time, you could’ve honestly stayed in the car forever.

the ice cream shop is busier than usual and it takes a minute for steve to realise you’re there, in the middle of serving a customer he falters, unable to continue the order coherently.

his eyes dart between you and the poor dad just trying to get ice cream as he finishes the transaction.

‘hey,’ you simper, smiling as you get to the counter.

‘hey.. i wasn’t expecting you, threw me off,’ he chuckles, readjusting the sailor hat on his head.

‘i couldn’t tell.. totally smooth,’ you’re reminded of his fumble last night, now he’d totally played it off.

‘shut up,’ he remarks, cheeks flushed with colour, ‘what brings you to scoops ahoy? apart from the ice cream of course,’ he moves from behind the counter, closer to you.

‘i was just wondering if you wanna go see a movie later?’ you shrug.

‘yes, yeah.. i’d love to,’ he nods excitedly before looking at his watch, ‘shit.. i’m supposed to be closing.. unless..’ he looks back at robin, who was sat at an empty table reading some gossip magazine.

she looks up at him over the tabloid and rolls her eyes, ‘fine,’ she grumbles, ‘but all of your tips next week are mine.’

his mouth falls open but he doesn’t protest, ‘deal,’ he reluctantly agrees before turning back to you with that same cheesy grin from last night.

‘so it’s a date?’

‘it’s a date,’ he nods, ‘i’m out of here at six.. d’you wanna hang out here ‘til i’m done?’

you narrow your eyes, looking around the brightly coloured establishment, ‘i’m gonna say no.. but i’ll be there,’ you laugh.

‘right, yeah.. see you at six,’ he calls out as you begin to walk away, ‘i don’t like waiting!’

you flash him your middle finger, giggling at his mockery.

-

it turns out, you’d spend a lot of time in scoops ahoy through the summer.

waiting for steve to finish work or joining him on his breaks, sat in a booth eating far too much free ice cream, sharing soft, vaguely strawberry flavoured kisses.

you also get to know robin, ganging up with her to bully steve, joking about how dorky he looked with that sailors hat perched on top of his quaffed hair.

one night after countless hours already spent with him at work, you’re lazing in his bed, almost dropping off to sleep as his fingers comb through your hair.

you groan into his chest, ‘i need to go..’ repositioning yourself to look up at him, pouting.

‘stay,’ he whispers, ‘fuck the rules,’ his chuckle vibrating his chest.

‘i can’t, my mom’ll kill me..’ you frown, but the way his own plump lips pouted at your denial made your heart skip a beat.

you knew there was now an actual number on how many more times you could do this before you had to go back to virginia.

‘stay..’ he breathes, ‘you’re already half-asleep.. no point in moving just to fall asleep again,’ he shrugs, determined to get you to stay.

‘hmm.. that’s a good point, i don’t have my pajamas though..’

he roars with laughter, shaking as his arm clings onto you, ‘wear something of mine, or do you specifically need your pajamas?’

‘no.. but they’re cute, cuter than your clothes,’ you grumble, slightly offended by his words.

‘yeah i’m sure, but you don’t need pajama’s.. not in steve’s bed,’ he jokes.

you flash him a look, ‘you’re a pervert.. get me something to wear then,’ poking him in the chest.

his eyes widen and a smile emerges, ‘you’re staying?’

you nod, returning the smile, ‘yeah, you’ve convinced me.. somehow.’

he lets go of his hold on you, rolling out of the bed to get to his dresser.

you shiver at the lack of contact, watching as he pulls out numerous options, agreeing on some old hawkin’s high basketball t-shirt.

he throws it over to you, undressing himself as you sit up, beginning to lift your shirt when he stops and you notice his eyes watching you.

‘i knew you were a pervert,’ you remark, suddenly coy, shrinking into the blanket.

‘sorry, sorry..’ his eyes drop to the floor as he steps out of his pants.

you lift the shirt off, left on his bed in just your bra, it’s like you can feel his stare boring into your skin and you look back up to meet his gaze.

‘what?’ you smile slightly, using your hand to cover your chest.

he steps over to the bed, the mattress dips as he sits, leaning over to you.

your cheeks blush, red hot as his hand caresses your cheek, gentle with his touch, ‘you are so beautiful.’

his eyes glisten as they look into yours, his lips connect with yours as his other hand comes up move your hand from your chest, leaving you exposed as he presses closer.

you lie back on the bed, still holding onto his shirt when you hook an arm around his neck.

he pulls back, his lips practically still on yours, breathing heavily and gazing at you.

‘so this is why you wanted me to stay?’ you quip, giggling.

he shakes his head, smiling, ‘no.. i wanted to ask you something.’

you brace, knowing exactly what’s coming next.

you’d thought about it, plenty. unsure of how your relationship would go, or if it was going to stay a summer fling; something you looked back on with fond memories.

‘hmm?’

‘i wanted to ask, if you would be my girlfriend? i know that you’re going back soon.. but i don't wanna lose this.. not without at least trying first.’

you smile up at him but you can't help the apprehensiveness and notices, his own smile falling slightly.

'you know i want to.. it'll be a lot of work, it won't be easy.. at all,' you attempt to make him understand.

'i know,' his thumb strokes your cheek, 'i've thought a lot about this, trust me, i wanna try.'

you swallow but the smile emerging on your face is inescapable, full on grinning at the boy above you.

deep down, you knew there was not a chance in hell you would've ever said no, there was too much unexplored. no way you could go the rest of your life knowing what you'd left behind.

'is that a yes?' he laughs, widening his eyes in anticipation.

'yes,' you nod, joining in with his laughter, 'of course it’s a yes..’

he presses his lips to yours once more, smiling into the kiss.

it’s magical, your stomach does flips as his other hand glides up your exposed torso. intimate but not inherently sexual, just wanting to be close to one another. to jump into his bones and stay there.

the thought of having to say goodbye in a few short weeks only more daunting.

-

you walk back into the wheeler household, fully prepared for whatever punishment you were to face.

to your surprise, no one bats an eye as you walk into the kitchen, the family and a random group of whom you can only guess are mike’s friends, huddled around the table eating a late breakfast.

‘oh my, you’re back! how was it?’ karen asks, eyes bright as she pushes charred pieces of bacon onto a plate.

you look over to nancy who very quickly widens her eyes and nods, signalling for you to go along with whatever comes out of her mothers mouth.

‘yeah! it was so good,’ you say, not half as convincing as you’d liked.

you weren’t even sure what ‘it’ was.

‘good! nancy loves those lock-ins.. i swear she’s been to so many over the summer, i hope it pays off!’ she grins, giving nancy a small pat on the shoulder.

‘liar,’ mike coughs under his breath and you rightfully shoot daggers at him over the table.

nancy gives him a swift kick in the chin under the table and he grits his teeth but doesn’t react.

‘i’m gonna go take a shower..’ you smile before leaving the kitchen, not wanting any further grilling from your own mom.

as you’re walking up the stairs the group of boys speed past, racing to the basement.

the last curly-headed boy stops and looks up at you, ‘i know who you are,’ he says and you stop, looking down at him over the bannister.

‘okay?’

he gives you a wide toothless smile, ‘i’m steve’s friend.. he’s told me about you, is that where you really were?’

‘errr.. you’re steve’s friend?’ taken aback that the small boy is friends with your fully grown boyfriend.

‘yeah,’ he brushes off your animosity, ‘so, was it?’

‘no,’ you smirk, ‘i was studying.. obviously.’

‘you’re a liar,’ he laughs before joining the others in the dinghy basement.

you roll your eyes and continue to walk up to nancy’s room, awaiting her arrival to fill her in on everything and thank her for saving your ass.

-

saying goodbye was all the more painful this time round.

without knowing when you were going to see each other next, it was hard to even stay positive.

of course you’d exchanged numbers and even made him a stack of pre-written envelopes with your address on so he was set to reply to your letters for at least a few months.

realistically, it was only a few hours drive but it felt like you were leaving him on the other side of the world, especially after going from spending every day together for the past few months to having no idea when you were gonna see his face again.

his arms are hooked around your waist, clinging on to the last bit of contact for god knows how long.

you sway slightly, arms around his neck as your mom gets into the loaded car.

she’ll give you a few minutes grace but you know she’ll start honking soon.

‘i have to go..’ you mumble, lips pressed against his shoulder.

‘i don’t want you to,’ he groans, not pulling away from the embrace, not yet.

you sniff, eyes brimming with tears, leaning up to place a soft kiss on his cheek, ‘i know.. i’ll call you as soon as we’re back, okay?’

he loosens his grip, placing his forehead to yours, ‘promise?’

you nod, a salty tear sliding down your face, his thumb is quick to wipe it away, ‘promise.’

‘i’ll see you soon.. you better call me every single day,’ he gives you a weak smile, his hand now cradling your cheek.

‘i will.. everyday,’ you laugh shakily, unwrapping your arms from his neck, running your hands down his arms.

he exhales, planting his lips to yours, leaving a short, tender kiss before finally releasing his grip on you, now taking your hand.

he walks you over to your moms car, very considerate to open the passenger door as you give his hand one last squeeze, sliding into the car.

‘bye.. as soon as you get back, yeah?’ his hand rests on the door.

‘i promise,’ you reassure him, a tiny smile on your lips.

he closes the door with a slam, bending over to wave to you and your mom as she starts the car.

the lump in your throat only growing as she pulls down the long drive and you can’t bring yourself to look at him through the mirror.

just knowing that it was the last time for the foreseeable that you were going to see him was too much.

your mom’s hand reaches over to rest on your knee as press your head against the cold window, miserable and without the one thing you’d grown so attached to.

[xenonsreturn]

In Another Life

A short story of Garrus Vakarian and Commander Shepard

I need to do . . . something. I need to get out of here. If I stay in the battery any longer, I think I'm going to explode. Why does this room have to be so damn small?

But where the hell am I going to go? No matter where I go, I have to bring my head with me. What I really need is to get out of my head.

Where is this coming from? I've been doing fine . . . well, as fine as any turian on a suicide mission can do. But now, I can't seem to think straight. I'm nervous. Which is new for me. I can't concentrate on my calibrations and they seem to go on forever. I find myself pacing. There's a buzzing all over my skin. Maybe I'm sick. I could go see Dr Chakwas . . . no. Bad idea. She'd remove me from duty – or worse, give me medicine.

I'm heading for the mess. Maybe just having something in my stomachs will help me settle down.

When did this start, anyway? Hmm. Illium. No, it was after that. Hell, I don't know. I know I was fine when Shepard and I tracked down Sedonis. I still wonder whether I could have taken the shot. Is that what's bothering me?

No, that's not it. Even if I could have, I saw what Shepard was doing. She didn't want me to take it. Saving me from myself, she said. Hmm. She's done that a couple times now. She's always trying to pull me back. I don't know why she cares so much. It's really irritating.

Still, I have to admit, I make better choices when she's around. And when she's not – well, I turn into Archangel. It's a lot easier to be Archangel, but . . . well, I feel stronger, somehow, here on the Normandy. And it's good to have some familiar faces around sometimes. Joker. Tali. Even Liara for a bit there. Shepard, of course. I probably have more in common with her than anyone else on the ship. Hell, than anyone else in my life. I liked it when she used to come down and talk, before Liara came back. Somehow, she made the battery feel a little larger, even though there were two of us in that tiny space. But now, she and Liara are back together, and she hasn't been around since, and I -

Oh.

Oh, damnation.

How did I not see this happening? And now it's too late, isn't it?

I thought – I guess I thought . . . that she . . . maybe . . . ah, hell.

Can I go back to not knowing what's bothering me? That was better than this.

Great. Now I'm talking to myself. Or hearing voices in my head. Whatever. But I'm right. I can't go into hiding – not from myself. I turn around and get a seat at the end of an empty table.

I'm going back to the battery. I need . . . cover. I do not want company right now. No, Garrus, dammit, you're going to the mess!

I'm not alone long, however. Tali shows up. Great.

"Is this seat taken?" She asks – then, without waiting for a reply, she sits down anyway.

"Uhh . . ." I look the length of the empty table. "Doesn't look like it." None of the other seats are taken, either – why don't you try that one way over there?

She just looks at me. Well, at least I think that's what she's doing. That damn mask makes her hard to read. Actually, come to think of it, I wish I had a mask. Lucky lady.

"What are you having?" She asks.

I pretend to be relaxed. I am sure I suck at it. "I don't know. Whatever Rupert's serving that won't kill me, I guess."

Tali chuckles. "Well, whatever won't kill you, won't kill me, either. Let's split an order."

So much for no company. Back to the battery, I guess. "Actually, I'm not hungry after all," I say, and start to get up.

With surprising speed, Tali reaches across the table and grabs my wrist. Not only is she fast, she's strong. In spite of my shock, I have to admit, I'm impressed.

"Don't. Go. Anywhere. Garrus."

Well, this is . . . unwelcome. I slowly sit back down. I have a bad feeling about this.

"You've been acting . . . strange, Garrus. Distracted."

This is worse than I thought. People can tell.

"Ah, I don't think – "

Tali cuts me off. "Don't deny it. You haven't been yourself since we left Hagalaz."

"Well – "

"I've seen you pacing."

"No, I – "

"Your aim was off on the last mission."

Okay, that's too much. "Now, wait just one goddamn minute – "

She sighs. "Garrus, calm down. It's obvious you've got some knot you're trying to untie, and we feel – "

"WE?" This day just keeps getting worse and worse. "Who's we?"

"Oh, you know, Miranda, Jack, Samara, Chakwas, Gabby."

Just when I think I've hit bottom. At least Shepard's not on the list. And -

"Not Kelly?"

"No, not Kelly. I know it's her job, but . . . well, quite frankly, none of us can stand her."

I don't understand that at all, but I'm really beyond caring at this point.

"Look, Garrus, we just want to help."

Help. Fantastic. Not only can people tell, not only are they talking about it, now they want to help. I'm Archangel, goddamn it.

"Tali. Go hack some other project. Right. Now."

I stare into that mask. She seems to stare back for a moment, then shrugs and stands up. "Fine. I tried. Chakwas said you'd do this." She turns away, but then turns back and says, "Take care of it yourself, then, Garrus. Good luck with that. You need it."

I just look at her until she's gone. I wish I could take some satisfaction in hurting her feelings, but it's clear that she's not hurt. She's just pissed. And also, well, I don't want to hurt her, not really. She's a good person on the team. I like her. It's just . . . don't go trying to get under my skin like that! You're not invited!

"So – " A voice right next to me. I look up and Rupert is standing there.

"What do you want?" I growl. I am kind of pleased that he backs up a step.

"Uh, that's what I was going to ask you, Garrus," he says, a little breathlessly. He holds out the day's menu. "What do you want?"

I take it out of his hands. "Just . . . give me something that will kill me."

It has not been a good day.

Back in the battery. I am, in fact, hiding. I don't want to go out there. Where they know. I just wish, in here, I didn't know. I must have been blind. And now, I wish I still was.

I look around the little space. I don't have much of mine here. Because I don't have much that's mine. I never thought about it, never thought I was missing anything, but right now, I do. Damn, do I.

At my terminal, there's my dad's old insignia from the fleet. I wonder, did dad ever have to deal with this sort of thing? I can't imagine it. But then, we were always so different. He had discipline. I have . . . what? Lack thereof, I guess. I can't help but rush in . . . and maybe that's why I feel this way. If he could have felt something like this, Dad would have damped it down. But I can't. Not anymore.

The only other time . . . well, there she is. Her dog tags hang next to Dad's insignia. Scout Lidia Misuraca. I wish I didn't have these tags. Because that would mean she'd still be alive. She might have been halfway across the galaxy – hell, she might even be fighting us; we are with Cerberus, after all – but she'd be living. I've run it through my head a thousand times and I still don't know if there was anything different I could have done during that raid, something that might have saved her life – but I still wonder. And maybe that's why I'm out here now.

And maybe she's not all. I take off my visor and run my finger over the ten names carved in the frame. Yeah. I had a team. Good people. And now they're all dead. Because of me. Maybe that's another reason I'm in here – because everyone I touch, dies. It's safer. For them. For me.

I look at the message on the terminal screen. Took me nearly an hour to write it.

Commander,

When you have a moment, I have something I need to discuss with you.

- Garrus

Am I giving too much away? My finger hovers over the 'send' key. Do I dare? And then I realize, it's the only way through this. I hit the key.

I am surprised by the fact that I actually feel some small measure of relief. We're out of the holding pattern now, I guess. I took action – just a little, but enough to set . . . something . . . in motion. I don't know if it's the best thing, but at least it's something. And what the hell am I hoping for anyway? I know she's with Liara. There's nothing that will change that. Maybe if I'd said something earlier, before Illium . . . ah, but I didn't know then, did I? Dammit. And anyway, Liara makes Shepard happy. Who am I to stand in the way of that?

But don't you deserve some happiness, too, Garrus? It's odd, but I hear Shepard's voice asking this question. Do I? I don't know. Ask me most days, I'd say…no. I don't deserve it. But when we're together, maybe I feel like I do. Maybe because she's always seen the best in me. So maybe I do deserve some happiness – but just because I might deserve it, doesn't mean I get it. The galaxy is a cold, cold place. It doesn't care what we deserve. It doesn't care for justice. It's just dark. And I guess it's up to us to be the stars, to hold against the darkness. That's what I strive for. And in a different way, so does Shepard. Different, but . . . well, I guess I had an idea that maybe we were just same enough to have some overlap, maybe enough common ground to build . . . something more than this.

And now she could be on her way down here. Right now.

The reality of this hits me like a . . . well, like a missile to the face. Suddenly, I need to get out again. Cursing my stupid finger that sent the message, I make for the door, but before I get there, it opens.

Shepard.

Ah, hell. Here we go. "Ah, Shepard. Guess you, ah, got my message."

Her eyebrows arch. "What message?"

She came down here just to see me, just to talk with me. I feel torn between two emotions – elation, and it's about fucking time.

"Ah, never mind," I say, hoping my voice sounds steady. I'm surprised that it does. "Just something I wanted to talk to you about, but it can wait. What brings you down here?" Because it's been awhile.

"Okay, yeah," she says. "I want to know if you have any contacts that can keep an eye on Hagalaz for me. I know Liara's capable, but . . ." She trails off, and I can see the concern on her face.

"You want a couple extra eyes watching her back," I say, without even thinking about it. Of course she does.

She smiles. "Yeah, something like that."

I love her smile. I hate how much I love her smile. "I know of three guys off the top of my head – one from my days at C-Sec who became a freelance mercenary, and two I know from Omega. All three will do the job for money. But they're good. And once they commit, they'll see it through." I see the relief in her face, in her posture. "I'll send their contact information to your terminal." I want to throw myself out the nearest airlock. But really, what the hell else am I going to do? Deny her help? That's not in me, not for her.

"Thanks, Garrus." She pauses. "How you been? I feel like I haven't been down here in ages."

That's because you haven't. "Well," I say, "you've been pretty busy. No problem, though – you always know where to find me."

She leans up against the door jamb. "Yeah, but I've missed you, Garrus. Things have been . . . well, crazier than usual, but I miss coming down here, hanging out with you."

She is actually killing me.

"I mean, hell," she goes on. "With almost everyone else, I'm Commander Shepard – Savior of the Citadel. It's really . . . annoying." She smirks. "But you know, we've worked together for a while now. It's good talking to someone I know. Someone I trust. There's a hell of a lot less of that in the galaxy than there ought to be."

"Yeah," I say, because I can't think of anything else to say. And then, I find myself saying, "Shepard, you know what we need? We need a bar on this goddamn ship."

She laughs. "Hell, yes! That's a great idea, Garrus!" She looks towards my footlocker. "Hey, that reminds me, you got any of that Batarian ale left?"

I grin. I'm actually starting to relax a bit. She always does that to me. And she's the only one. "Yeah, I might have a couple bottles left."

I get out the bottles and pop the tops with my talon. She was so impressed the first time I did that.

"Cheers," she says as I hand her one. She tips the bottle back in my direction.

I return the gesture. "Cheers to you, Shepard," I say.

"Garrus, when we're off duty, just call me Hera. We've known each other long enough for that." I do not show how much what she just said means to me.

"Okay, Hera," I say, trying the name out. We both tip the ale back. It burns a bit, but man, the flavor is fantastic. It really lingers.

And then, as she lowers the bottle, I catch a . . . tightening in her face. Like a shadow passing over. And I'm not the smartest man alive, but I know where it came from. I could ignore it . . . ah, hell, no I can't. "So, Comm- ah, Hera. You and Liara? You've . . . worked things out?"

She looks at me, the smirk reappearing from the shadow. "You know me too well. You know that, Garrus?"

If it wasn't for the smirk, I'd change the subject. "Well, maybe I do," I say instead.

"Yeah. Yes," she says. "We have worked things out. Very . . . thoroughly."

I kind of want to die right now.

She sighs. "But it just means I'm going to miss her all over again."

And for a moment, my heart breaks a little – not for me, but for her. I don't know what to say, but I come up with, "Yeah, but it's good to have someone to miss. Someone you know you'll be coming back to. It's a good thing . . . a good thing to see."

I glance at my terminal, and I think of the only other one who ever was close to me. And now . . .

She clears her throat. "Yeah, Garrus. You're right. You're right. It is good. Thanks." I turn to see her smiling at me, but her eyes, well, human eyes, you can tell when there's something going on behind them. And I realize, I've just seen her, hurting for Liara, and she's just seen me, hurting for Lidia. The fact that we saw each other in this moment lightens my heart. I feel . . . bold.

"Anyway, Garrus," she says, breaking our gaze. "You said you sent me a message?"

Ah, crap.

"It's nothing, really, I'm just . . ." I set my bottle down and look at her. "You know, I work pretty well alone. I can go where I want, do what I want, when I want – I have focus. No distractions. Just the job. I don't need much. And it's good - I think, working that way, I make some small difference in the Galaxy."

"A lot more than that, Garrus."

I shrug, even though I'm touched by the compliment. "Maybe. But sometimes . . . well, I like to see what you and Liara have. And sometimes, I think, maybe I'd like something like that, too."

She smiles. "Thanks, Garrus. It's good. It is. But you know, it's also . . . complicated." She takes a breath. "Boy, that word doesn't even cover it. I died. She almost became . . . someone else. And both of us thought the other had moved on. When I think about it, I'm amazed we managed to find the space together." She chuckles. "It's really a mess!" She looks at me. "Who knows, maybe you're the lucky one."

"Huh, maybe." I don't feel lucky.

She raises her eyebrows.

I suddenly can't face her and turn away. "I'm glad for you, though. It's a . . . good mess. I never thought I'd say this, but maybe sometimes a mess is better. But for me, well . . . there's no one . . . available. And that's my fault. I don't really know how . . . I spend so much energy keeping people at arm's length – "

She interrupts. "Well, that's certainly saying something."

I turn back see her looking at my arms. I can't help but feel a little thrill go up my spine. "Yeah, I guess it is." I chuckle. How does she do this, make me talk when I just want to shut up? "But maybe I don't do enough to let people in. I just – well, sometimes I feel like I'm alone in the whole damn galaxy. I've been thinking about it a lot lately – maybe I'm a poorer man for that . . . I don't know, maybe I'm just getting old, thinking of where I might be down the relay." I start to feel like I'm saying too much, like I've already said too much. I want to change the subject. "Hell, I don't know why I bother thinking about this. We're not likely to survive this mission anyway."

But – typical Shepard – she won't let it go. "But you are thinking about it."

"Yeah." Dammit. "Yeah, I am." And then I look at her, and I see her being, well, who she is. For me. "Thanks, Shepard. There isn't really anyone else I'd want to talk to about this." And then it hits me, and my boldness returns. She deserves to know the truth. I step right up to her. "You know what I was saying about arm's length? Well, there's not many who've managed to get beyond that. In fact, ah, there's just one. It's good to have someone I can . . . trust." I take a breath and look her right in the eye. "It's you, Shepard. I'm a better man because of you. And I . . . I just . . ."

The words fail me, right when I need them the most.

I see her face soften, suddenly, and I know she knows. She understands.

I can't stand it. I turn my back on her. "Ah, never mind."

I feel her hands on me as she turns me back around. "Hey."

I look right at her. I am certain everything I'm feeling is plain upon my scarred face.

She rests her hands on my shoulders, and I see a thousand emotions playing across her face. "Garrus, I want you to know something. I trust you, too. I don't make a habit of that. And I don't let people get close to me easily or often, either." She pauses. "In this life, you and I are . . . .what we are. And I'm thankful for that." She nods. "But in another life . . ." She looks right into my eyes. "Garrus, yes. Yes."

I can feel something loosen in my chest. I know what she's saying, and although it kills me, I feel a surge of warmth throughout my whole body. She cares, she really does. It's not perfect, it's not the same thing I feel, but . . . I am important to her. I nod, and then I feel a real smile cross my face. "Hearing you say that . . . in this life . . . is . . . almost as good. Almost as good as another life."

[sungvis]

Taste

Lee Felix x afab! Reader

Contains; fluff,smut,angst

Story; fluff & angst

Proof read?; Nope

Next chapter

9:45 Am

"Felix, do you have the same class as me which is math or a different one?" You and Felix were best friends ever since 7th grade, Felix had the biggest crush on you you made his flutter every time he was around you, and of course you gave him butterflies. "Felix..hello?" Waving your hand In front of Felix wasn't anything, once you stopped to put your hand against your body he snapped out of it "huh"Felix mumbled, his eyes moved to eyes to your lips but before you say anything about it he quickly looked back at your face "...Felix are you okay?" "Yea uh..just tired" you knew Felix was just coming up with excuses but you didn't really care...for now at least. "Let's go to class, wait do you have math lix?" "Yea I do" Felix answered with a plain tone, "okay let's go now" when you grabbed Felix's hand Felix felt really nervous he used to hold your hand a lot when you guys were younger but for some reason he never felt that way.

You were now sitting at your desk with your hair down waiting for the teacher you felt eyes on you (Felix) but you just ignored it. A few minutes later the teacher came, she dropped her books on her table to talk after "Okay class, we are gonna do math in our math books!" Once she said that everyone groaned in disappointment "now now everyone, we have an exam coming up soon and if you don't wanna learn and you fail it's your fault!" The teacher explained ” everyone get a partner!" Everyone started to get their partners except for you and Felix until some girl came up to Felix you lifted your head to see that girl was liea (a random character) she had a "little" crush on Felix you hated her she used you only to get closer to Felix, you didn't really like Felix like he was your crush..I mean you actually had a tiny crush on him "lixiee~ wanna be partners?" She put her hand on his shoulder making him jump a bit as he looked at liea "sorry bu-" before Felix could finish his sent the teacher interrupted him "y/n, liea, and Felix, you guys can be in a group because everyone is taken and I don't want y/n to be alone!" Liea rolled her eyes as you walked up to Felix's desk "let's just start" Felix said while pulling out the chair for you to sit down as he ignored liea's chair "thank you lix" you say smiling at Felix "welcome" Felix said back liea sat down acting like a 1 year old and to be honest about liea she's a pick me when it comes to Felix.

"lixie can you hang out with mee?" Liea is always desperate to talk to Felix but when it comes to you shes always rude but you never say anything about it "sorry but I'm gonna hang out with y/n today" "Felix come on you can dump her!" You were so irritated by her you didn't know what to do "Liea can't you just leave Felix alone for once it's not that hard if wants to hang out with me let him because he obviously doesn't want you to hang out with him so just stop and leave. him. alone." "Damn who hurt you y/n" "you obviously!" Liea stayed quiet looking at you she never did that she always had a comeback but they were bad comebacks not gonna lie "y/n it's okay" Felix grabs your hand comforting you. The bell rings which caused everyone sighing in relief, all of you guys had to do three pages of math + math textbooks it was boring and frustrating since you guys are in college work was harder then you thought "come on n/n let's go" Felix dragged you outside the classroom " you okay? " "Yea lix I'm okay it's just she gets on my nerves''.

8:22 Pm

"n/n, Are you awake?" You were taking a nap peacefully , the tv shining on the wall and the bed, Felix poked your cheek until he realized how pretty you looked sleeping. You woke up to Felix Infront of you "oh, hey lix" you said slowly opening your eyes"oh hi y/n uhh, I was wondering if you would like a brownie I just baked them" he offered you "of course lix I'm in the mood for a brownie actually" You were half asleep but more awake then sleep if you know what I mean "okay be right back" Felix left the room to bring you a brownie, you stretched to feel more awake? You sat up as Felix came back, Felix gave you the brownies and you just ate it "thanks lix" "no problem" Felix exists the room to go to his room, Felixs grabs his notebook to write

"should I confess?"

A/n; sorry it's kinda short but I might make the other one longer but hope you enjoyed it!