#anyways. so like. maria…… this is what you wanted right. him to be free and cringe | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alltheirdamn · 10 months ago

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Killing Me Softly | (Joel x teacher!f!reader)

Chap. 5 Nevermore

Chp. 5 Summary: It's hard to understand why everything feels so right. Rating: 18+ Explicit MDNI Word Count: 5.5k Warnings: Pre-outbreak AU, language, heavy kissing, unprotected piv sex, semi-rough sex, creampie, praise kink, (kinda) size kink, aftercare, fluff and a LOT of angst, light banter, lots of emotions, mentions of past trauma, brief flashback of trauma, another cliffhanger (sorry) A/N: Well, if you're here, I hope you're prepared for what's coming. A HUGE shoutout to @loonmartell for helping co-conspire the trajectory of this story. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it as always <3

Masterlist | Ko-fi

I think he’s already falling in love with you. I think he’s already falling in love with you. I think he’s already falling in love with you. I think he’s already falling in—

“Miss Smith?”

Your head jerked up at the sound, and the pencil you were drawing circles with fell against your desk. Bradley, one of your students, was standing at the edge of your desk with his test in hand.

“Sorry about that, sweetie,” you smiled, extending a hand. “Thank you.”

Bradley eyed you curiously before turning and skipping back to his desk. You dragged a hand over your face, wanting to crawl into the furthest corner of the world and never be seen again. Beth’s words had been plaguing you for days since you called her. Over and over again, they annihilated your thoughts, a constant broken record that you couldn’t shut off. You still had your nightly calls with Joel, talking past midnight and falling asleep together, but you kept making excuses not to see him.

“I’ve got lesson plans to make,” you lied.

“I’ll help,” Joel had offered.

“You’re a distraction.”

“I ain’t that bad,” he huffed.

The next night, you lied and said you were going out with Maria, which was an even worse lie since you were avoiding her at all costs. Telling Beth the news was one thing, but telling Maria was another matter. She was nosey and a bit too loud-mouthed to trust. The last thing you wanted was for the entire faculty to know your dirty secrets. Joel had to remain a secret—at least for now.

It’s not like you wanted to avoid Joel; you were just scared. You were not ready for this new territory, and if Beth was anywhere near correct in her assumptions, it only made you want to shy away more. The only problem was parent-teacher conferences this week, meaning you’d have to see Joel and Sarah…together.

The class bell rang, and your free period between classes began. You dropped your head on the desk and took a few deep breaths, trying to wrangle some semblance of calm back into your body. The final class of the day would be Sarah’s, and you’d be lying if you said you were prepared to see her. The blaring reminder that her dad had fucked you sore over the weekend still hung over your head, and you couldn’t help but feel slightly guilty for it. How was your fall break, Sarah? Oh yeah, mine was great. Your dad fucked me so hard I ended up having a complete breakdown.

Fuck.

You wanted the day to be over.

The free period went by much faster than you wanted, and as you watched the next slew of kids take their seats, you made a conscious effort not to stare at Sarah as she walked in. She wore her usual smile, the impression of her dimples digging into her cheeks. Some wild thought popped into your head that you had no time to recover from: if you and Joel went any further, God help you, you’d be Sarah’s step-mom one day. Your stomach rolled with nausea as you tried to will those thoughts away. Joel wouldn’t stick around that long; you were a lost cause. There was no chance that would happen. Right?

Clearing your throat, you rose from your desk and made your way over to the projector to set up the lesson for the day. Since the school year was nearing Halloween, you decided it would be fun to teach Edgar Allen Poe, completely forgetting you had chosen “The Raven”—which was about losing someone. This would have a bite to it that you weren’t ready for.

“Okay, everyone,” you announced. “Did we all finish the reading assignment this week?”

There were a few nods and murmurs of agreement, and you quickly shifted to the first few slides of your presentation.

“Alright, so who can tell me the overall theme for Poe’s ‘The Raven’?”

Georgia, one of your top students, shot her hand up without a beat.

“Yes, Georgia?”

“It’s about his grief for losing Lenore,” she answered.

“Good,” you smiled. “Can anyone tell me what other theme the poem contains?”

“Madness!” Another student chimed in, causing an uproar of laughter amongst the students.

“Okay, okay, settle down. Very good, you guys.”

You switched to the next slide, staring blankly at the words typed out. Lenore is gone forever. Something struck you as you silently read it, realizing you weren’t too far off from Poe in his grief. Although Bennett wasn’t dead, he wasn’t coming back. That fact hadn’t hurt as deeply throughout the last few weeks, especially with Joel around, but it still threw salt in the open wounds still scattered over your heart.

“In stanza two,” you cleared your throat. “In stanza two, Poe refers to Lenore as ‘nameless,’ which can imply that she has died, and he’s now consumed with grief. Where else did you guys find his grief prominent?”

Georgia quickly raised her hand again, and you motioned for her to speak.

“In stanza four, he talks about his dreams, which I think he means he’s dreaming of her to return to him. But if she’s dead, there’s no way she’s going to come back,” Georgia said.

Fuck. You felt the sting of tears rim your eyes and briefly paused to gather your bearings. Bennett left. He left, and you had spent years dreaming he would return.

“Good,” you choked out.

You glanced around the room, your eyes connecting with Sarah’s. It took all your strength not to break down and cry as she studied you with the same concerned furrow in her brows as her dad would do.

Clicking to the next slide, you exhaled, focusing on the following theme to discuss. Madness.

“Now, with the theme of madness, where do we see this begin? Obviously, the dreams can be interpreted as his descent into madness, but what else do we find?” You asked.

To your detriment, Sarah was the one to raise her hand.

“Sarah,” you sighed, nodding.

“It’s the raven,” she said plainly. “The raven is what drives him mad.”

“What does he do to drive Poe mad?” You questioned.

“The raven only says one word,” she explained. “And that word drives him mad until the end of the poem.

“And why does it drive him mad?”

Sarah shifted in her seat, looking around at her classmates before responding.

“Because it’s the answer Poe doesn’t want to hear. Poe doesn’t want to be reminded that Lenore is dead, but that’s the only response the raven will give.”

You were swaying in place, trying to hold yourself together as the memories started ricocheting back into your mind. Now wasn’t the time to collapse, not in front of twenty students staring at you, confused and concerned. You only responded with a nod and flipped the projector off.

“Good job, you guys. Now, does anyone have any questions on this unit? Any questions about the stanza format or the themes?”

Sarah raised her hand again.

“Did his madness kill him?” She asked.

“Who?”

“Poe.”

“Oh, um, no. Well, it’s a mystery, really. Some people say he died of delirium, so, I guess, madness. But other people speculate he drank himself to death.”

The class grew morbidly quiet, which made it harder for you to continue. No one else spoke up after Sarah, so you resorted to handing out the quiz and sinking back into your desk chair.

One by one, the students came up to turn in their quiz, and you averted your gaze each time with a nonchalant ‘thank you.’ When the final bell finally sounded through the room, you hardly had the energy to wave goodbye.

Sarah was the last to leave, and that same concerned look lingered on her face as she shuffled out.

That night, you didn’t pick up the phone when Joel called. You stared as it rang repeatedly, watching the light fade from the screen when the ringing stopped. You buried your head under the covers and tried to sleep, but then the nightmares started.

You woke up to your alarm, hyperventilating and drenched in sweat. Squinting at the morning sun streaming through the blinds, you grabbed your phone to check the time. Your fingers froze as you read the screen.

Seven missed calls from Joel

Two voicemails from Joel

With shaky fingers, you pressed play on the first voicemail.

“Hey baby, it’s me. I just wanna make sure you’re okay. I’m hopin’ you’re just asleep, but if you’re up, please call me.”

Then you played the next.

“Baby, it’s me again. I miss you, and I’m worried ‘bout you. Please don’t shut me out, okay? I just wanna hear your voice and hear ‘bout your day. If you don’t wanna talk, that's okay. I understand. Just please lemme know you’re alright. I’ll drive my ass out to you if I need to just to make sure you’re okay. Call me when you get this. G’night, baby.”

You dug your knuckles into your eyes to try and force the tears back. Last night, you had the worst of the nightmares: the memory of something you tried to forget. You hadn’t touched that memory in so long. It was just the brutal realization you were truly at fault for everything with Bennett. No matter how badly you wanted to blame him, it was always your fault.

Glancing back at your phone, you rechecked the time: 7:35. Fuck, you were running late, and you really didn’t want to call Joel back right now. At least not right now. You’d muster the energy and strength to do it later, but you needed to gather yourself and get ready for work right now. Tossing off the sweat-slick sheets, you rushed into the bathroom and quickly showered. You couldn’t bother to put makeup on, so you opted to go without it and found a simple dress to wear. It was still in the high eighties in Austin, and a dress was the easiest option for the day.

Scrambling for your purse and keys, you ran to the garage to start your car and head to the school.

It wasn’t until you pulled into your parking spot that you realized you left your phone on the nightstand.

“Okay, what’s going on?” Maria questioned, sipping her lukewarm coffee.

She had nagged you into spending your free period in her classroom, demanding that you tell her everything that you had been withholding. You sat on the edge of her desk, your dress flowing over your knees as you stared out her class windows.

“Nothing, Maria,” you lied.

She said your name sternly, forcing your eyes to snap to hers. Her usual chipper demeanor was replaced with that ‘mother’ look, her lips pursed and eyes narrowed.

“Something is going on,” she pressed. “Could have something to do with Mr. Miller?”

“Maybe,” you mumbled, fidgeting with the hem of your dress.

“You did it, huh?” She raised a brow.

You exhaled heavily, nodding your head—no point in lying now.

“We talked on the phone the entire break, and when I got home, he insisted on taking me on a date. Then one thing led to another… and yeah, we had sex.”

Maria squealed, clapping her hands and grinning wide. You stared at her blankly, unamused by her reaction to your words.

“This isn’t a good thing, Maria,” you said pointedly.

“Why wouldn’t it be? You’re finally putting yourself out there! Oh my god, was it good?”

“It was,” you sighed. “It was good—really good. He’s so sweet and caring.”

“I feel like there’s a ‘but’ in there somewhere,” she interjected.

“But I can’t let it go any further,” you finished.

Maria leaned forward and placed her hand on your knee.

“Does he make you happy?” She asked softly.

“So fucking happy, Maria. I hate it.”

“You deserve to be happy, sweetie. That’s all I’ve been saying for years, and now you have it! Don’t force it to fail before it even begins. I saw the way he looked at you at the father-daughter dance. You can’t fake that.”

“I know. I know. I just—ugh,” you slid off the desk with a groan. “He’s too good for me. I’m still trying to get over Bennett and everything that happened. He doesn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of all my misery. That’s not fair to him.”

You were pacing around the room, your eyes darting between the science posters hanging along the walls of Maria’s classroom. You heard her desk chair scrape against the floor as she approached you. She gripped you by the shoulders and leveled you with a heavy stare, but her eyes remained soft.

“He’s still around, right? I don’t think he’s going anywhere, sweetie. If anything, I think he’s in it for the long haul.”

You didn’t know how to respond, so you leaned into her, letting her wrap you up in a motherly embrace. She rubbed circles against your back, hushing you as you wept quietly.

The rest of the day passed by in a numbing blur. You packed your things quietly and headed to your car, ready to drown yourself in a glass of wine.

Joel’s truck was parked in front of your house as you turned the corner onto your street. His tall figure was leaning against the driver’s door; his eyes focused on your car as you pulled into the driveway. You inhaled sharply before putting your car in park, mentally preparing yourself for whatever anger he might unleash.

You barely shut the car door before Joel had his arms around you, tugging you into a warm embrace. You couldn’t make sense of it; why wasn’t he mad? He should be angry at you.

“Joel?” you whispered, your fingers twisting into his shirt. He smelt of cedarwood and smoke, the lingering scent of the workday still on his clothes.

“I was so fuckin’ worried ‘bout you,” he muttered into your hair. “Been tryin’ to get ahold of you all day.”

“I left my phone at home this morning,” you explained. “I listened to your voicemails from last night. I’m sorry I didn’t call back. I was just running late this morning.”

“Why didn’t you pick up last night?’ He asked, pulling away.

“I needed some space. I’m just trying to figure this all out. I want you—I want this. I just don’t know how to be fully vulnerable. I know that’s silly to say since I’ve cried every time I’ve seen you.” You laughed at the thought of it.

“You coulda just told me that, baby. I would’ve understood,” Joel sighed.

“You’re not mad at me?”

“Of course not,” he smiled softly. “Had me worryin’ like crazy, but I ain’t mad. I know this is all new, and you’re scared. Just don’t shut me out, ‘kay? I wanna talk to you and understand what’s goin’ on with you. I told you I wanna work on it with you.”

“I’m s—.”

Joel was pressing his lips against yours before you could say those two words. The kiss was all-consuming and tender, strong enough to erase every thought in your mind. Your mouths moved in unison, tongues intertwined and exploring. It was dizzying to be kissed this fervently; the first kiss couldn’t hold a torch to this moment. You tangled your fingers into the curls at the base of his neck, slanting your lips to open yourself even more to him. Joel’s hands twisted into the fabric of your dress that hugged your hips and pulled you tighter against his body. You whimpered at the feeling of his cock straining in his jeans, and he hauled you upwards until you were wrapping your legs around his waist.

Spinning you around, he pinned you to the metal of your car door, breaking away from your mouth to kiss down your neck. Was it possible to be branded by a dozen kisses? He left a trail of sweltering kisses over every exposed part of your upper body, and all you could do was pant and moan helplessly. To hell with the neighborhood and their lingering eyes; the world around you could collapse, and you’d still be clinging to his body.

“I told you I didn’t wanna hear those apologies,” Joel muttered against the hollow of your neck.

“What are you gonna do about it, Joel?” You moaned, his teeth grazing your collarbone.

“All I want right now is to hear you screamin’ my name, so you better invite me inside before I fuck you right here.”

“Jesus Christ,” you whispered.

“Wrong name, baby.”

With one strong arm braced around your back and a firm hand on your ass, Joel carried you out of the driveway and through the open garage. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pressing open-mouthed kisses against the bare patches in his beard. Joel stumbled into the living room and sat you on the edge of the couch. You clung to him, refusing to lay back, too afraid to disconnect from his body. There was something so addicting, so right about being in his arms—almost familiar.

“Y’look so beautiful in this dress, baby,” Joel breathed. “Turn around.”

You unattached yourself from him, spinning until your thighs pushed against the leather of the couch. Joel’s hands roamed over your calves, dragging your dress up until it piled against your lower back. You gasped as his fingers tore apart your underwear, the scraps falling down your legs and piling at your feet. It was embarrassing how wet you were already, your slick coating your inner thighs.

“Joel,” you whined as he swiped a finger through your wet folds.

“Use your words,” he hummed, slowly pushing in two fingers.

“I need you, Joel.” He curled his fingers against the spot that left you breathless, coaxing you to speak more. “Need it rough—please.”

You needed to feel how bad he needed you; you needed to show him you wanted him, even if it meant doing it without saying it aloud.

“Y’want it rough, baby? I can do that. If it’s too much, you tell me, okay?”

“Okay,” you exhaled.

Joel pulled his fingers from you, bringing them to your mouth and smearing your arousal over your parted lips. You hummed as you tasted yourself, pushing your ass back into him. You heard the clang of his belt and the soft sound of his jeans hitting the floor before he swiped his cock across your slick entrance.

“Don’t be gentle,” you moaned.

“Anythin’ you want, baby.”

That was all he said before splitting you open, the fullness of his cock inside you robbing you of all the breath in your lungs. Joel kept his hips flush with yours, his fingertips drifting down the fabric of your dress covering your spine.

“Joel,” you whined.

You shifted yourself onto the tips of your toes, nudging yourself back until the tip of his cock rubbed against the right spot inside you. You mewled at the sensation, wiggling your hips to find some sort of relief from the pleasure churning inside your stomach.

“Impatient, baby?” Joel teased.

He moved against you slowly, letting you adjust to his size. You had been in such a haze last time you hadn’t realized how big he actually was, but now you felt every glorious inch of him inside you. You let out another frustrated whimper, and Joel responded with an onslaught of forceful thrusts. Your body shoved further into the couch, your midsection rubbing against the edge every time Joel snapped his hips against yours.

Joel’s hand snaked around your neck, drawing you back into his chest, the angle of his cock spearing deeper inside you. Your wails turned to sobs as you listened to Joel grunting harder behind you, his fingers squeezing rhythmically around your throat.

“That’s it, baby,” Joel crooned. “That’s it. Doin’ so well for me.”

You gasped for air as the desire coiling within your core became agonizing and all-consuming. Your fingers wrapped around his hand holding you up, clawing at his skin as his thrusts became erratic and determined. You were teetering on the edge of euphoria, your body buzzing with pleasure.

“Touch yourself, baby,” Joel whispered into your ear.

You fought against your dress to find your clit, the instant connection of your fingers causing you to cry out. Joel’s mouth ravaged your neck, sucking marks into the skin as you drew tantalizing circles over the sensitive bud. It was right there— that explosive pleasure bubbling under the surface.

“Don’t stop,” you begged, your voice strained under his grip. “Don’t—right there. Right there, Joel!”

Joel quickened the pace, your eyes blurring as your orgasm raced through your veins and set your nerves ablaze. Your sex clenched around his cock, forcing him to slow his thrusts as he groaned into your ear.

“S’fuckin’ good, baby,” he punched out, releasing your neck.

“More,” you heaved.

“Think y’can take it?” He asked, pinning you down onto the couch cushions.

“Just want you, Joel,” you said. Your words were muffled into the couch as you exhaled, “Want everything with you.”

You didn’t know if Joel heard you, and you prayed he didn’t. Your brain was lost in some euphoric haze, dizzying you and your ability to control your emotions. Joel knew every part of your body, like the back of his hand. He knew exactly what you needed and what you wanted, and it was so confusing.

But all your thoughts grew quiet as the lewd sounds of your arousal and his ragged breathing echoed around the house. Joel’s hand pressed into your hair as he pushed you further into the couch. Bent over this way, you were entirely at his mercy, putty in his hands, and helpless.

“Swear y’were fuckin’ made for me, baby,” Joel grunted. “You’re mine, baby. Mine.”

“Yours,” you cried. “I’m—.”

You couldn’t finish your sentence as Joel seized up, choking out your name as he spilled into you. His body slumped over yours, the weight of his chest heavy against your back. The hammering of his heart matched yours as you both recovered in silence, the house growing quiet aside from your labored breathing.

“Too rough?” Joel muttered into your hair.

You shifted your face to the side, rewarded by his lips pressing into your cheek.

“Perfect,” you sighed. “It was perfect.”

“You weren’t lyin’ when you said you weren’t a fan of vanilla, huh?” Joel chuckled, pulling out of you.

You slumped further into the couch, laughing softly.

“I was talking about cake, Joel. Get your mind out of the gutter.”

“Sure you were, baby. Stay right there, okay?”

You heard his footsteps disappear toward your bedroom, the distant sound of water turning on and off floating down the hallway. A second later, Joel was behind you again, the cool touch of a towel making you jerk away in shock. He gently rubbed the cloth over your inner thighs, taking extra caution of your sore entrance. You’d feel him everywhere tomorrow, and you didn’t hate that for some reason—you wanted the reminder of him.

“C’mere,” Joel urged, helping you stand.

He pulled you over to the couch, curling you into his arms and bracing you against his chest. Joel intertwined his fingers with yours, his breathing evening out as you shimmed further into his embrace. Maybe it was the sex, maybe it was just being around him, but all your doubts and worries seemed to fade away. It was just this moment; you and him with limbs entangled together.

“Tell me somethin’ no one knows about you,” Joel whispered.

“Only if you tell me something in return.”

“Of course, baby.”

You paused, considering all the possibilities of what you could share. You had forgotten pieces of yourself over the years, the layers of heartbreak and trauma suffocating the person you once were. You still weren’t sure if that girl you had once been was still inside you.

“I hate pancakes,” you said.

Joel laughed, his body shaking behind you as you buried your head into the couch.

“Pancakes? Really?” He teased.

“I just don’t like them!” You defended.

“Y’gonna tell me why?”

“I don’t know,” you grumbled. “They’re just too sweet.”

“So y’don’t like sugar in your coffee, and y’think pancakes are too sweet,” Joel mused. “What do you like?”

“Don’t tease me, Joel.”

His fingers prodded your sides, forcing you to shriek at the contact. You hated to be tickled and hated it even more when he kept you pinned to your chest with nowhere to go. You rolled toward him, squirming against his touch. Joel leaned in to kiss you softly, muffling your protests as you settled into his arms.

“Your turn,” you sighed.

“Hmm, well, I like pancakes.”

“Be serious, Joel,” you frowned.

“Okay, okay. I love watchin’ cartoons.”

You giggled, watching that grin stretch across his face.

“Been watchin’ them with Sarah since she was a kid,” he chuckled. “I still do sometimes, even if she ain’t home.”

“That’s cute,” you smiled.

You brought your fingers to his face, scratching at the stubble covering his chin and jaw. Joel’s eyes shut as your touch drifted over the patchy spots, your fingertips drawing circles in the places his beard disconnected.

“Tell me somethin’ else,” he said.

“I think you’re really handsome.”

It was a quick response—almost too fast—but you couldn’t swallow back the words. You glanced up at him, peeking through your lashes to see his brown eyes soften.

“Handsome, huh?”

“Well, I can’t call you cute,” you scrunched your nose. “It doesn’t fit you. I like handsome more.”

“I like it,” he smiled. “Call me handsome all y’want.”

You dragged him to your mouth, saying everything you couldn’t form into words. Joel moved with you, his head tilting and mouth molding to yours. He made everything feel so simple; maybe that’s what scared you. It was too easy with him—falling into this idyllic routine. Joel mumbled your name, pulling himself reluctantly from your lips. You chased one more kiss and settled back into his chest.

“Did you know it’s good luck when it rains on your wedding day?” You thought out loud.

Joel tensed up, his arms flexing around you.

“Superstition says it means your marriage will last,” you continued. “I’ve always thought it was funny, you know? I used to believe in that before my wedding, but after that, I figured everyone had lied to me.”

“Baby,” Joel whispered.

“No, it’s okay. There’s a point to this, I promise.”

“Tell me,” he urged softly.

“I think the rain was good luck. Maybe not in the way people think, but I don’t think Bennett and I were meant to get married. My sister hated me for going through with it. We didn’t really talk once Bennett and I got engaged. Everyone warned me about him; they told me he wasn’t who I should be with. I was so stubborn to make things work. He—he was there for me during a really awful time in my life. I thought I owed it to him to stay.

“But then here you are, and it makes me re-think everything. The rain? It’s still good luck, just in a different way. I wasn’t meant to be with him because maybe… maybe I was meant to be with you.”

Joel was painfully quiet, his eyebrows furrowing together as he closed his eyes. Oh, fuck. You had rambled out everything you were scared to say, and now it was biting you in the ass. This was why you were too afraid to acknowledge your feelings: the rejection. Joel didn’t see it the same way; he didn’t think of you in the same way, and you just made a complete idiot of yourself.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you muttered, trying to pry yourself out of his grip. You kept the tears at bay, trying not to let yourself succumb to the heartbreak shattering inside you.

Joel’s hands wrangled you back to his chest, his eyes leveling with yours. You inhaled sharply as his fingers brushed away the rogue tears falling down your cheeks.

“There ain’t a doubt in my mind y’were meant for me, baby. I’m thankin’ God every day for bringin’ you into my life,” Joel confessed. “I know this is all new, but I promise to keep provin’ myself because whatever this is between us, it’s real.”

“It’s real,” you echoed.

“Don’t run away from me,” Joel pleaded. “Gimmie all the good and bad stuff. I swear I can handle it.”

“What if you get tired of me? What if I’m not enough?” You rambled.

“I could never get tired of you, baby. If anythin’, I keep wantin’ more.”

You snuggled further into his embrace, inhaling his scent as you pressed your nose into his chest. Joel ran a hand through your hair, his fingers catching on a few knots left from earlier.

“What’d you mean when you said he was there for you durin’ somethin’ awful?” Joel asked after a beat of silence.

Flashes of the crash came back into your mind, or at least the ones you could recall. You squeezed your eyes shut as your nightmares began to see the light of day. It was a memory you never liked to revisit.

“Easy,” your mom whispered. “Easy, honey. Don’t move too much, okay? Take it slow.”

Your eyes fluttered open, the harsh lights above you burning into your retinas as you tried to adjust to the room fading into the forefront. You were tucked into a hospital bed, IVs and tubes sticking out of both arms. Your head was pounding, and everything hurt. That’s all you could focus on. Everything hurt so fucking bad.

“Bennett?” You croaked, searching the room.

Your mom, dad, Beth, and Stella were all grouped around the foot of the bed, their eyes glassy with tears. Bennett was nowhere to be found. Beth’s fear-stricken eyes shifted from your mom to your dad before she bolted from the room.

“I’m going to go get the doctor,” your mom announced, turning and leaving the room.

Stella shifted uncomfortably and promptly followed, leaving your dad alone at the foot of your bed.

“How’re you feeling, peanut?” He asked, rounding to the side of your bed.

“Pain,” you cried softly.

“It’s gonna be okay,” he assured. “It’s all gonna be okay.”

“Baby?” Joel said cautiously.

“S–sorry,” you mumbled. “I don’t know if I really want to talk about it.”

Joel’s brows scrunched together, his eyes staring at you with concern. You turned away from him, lifting yourself from the couch. Pacing the living room, you stared blankly at your bookshelf beside your entertainment center, still collecting dust after two years. You heard Joel shift against the couch behind you and glanced back to see him staring at you intensely. Anxiety was thrumming in your chest the longer you stood in front of him, too many thoughts reeling inside your mind. You never talked about the accident; you didn’t want to be reminded of what had been the catalyst in your relationship's failure. Because that’s what it was. You owed everything to Bennett for sticking by your side through it all, and in the end, you weren’t enough. Nothing you did was enough to salvage what had been your life with him before it all.

“Hey,” Joel exhaled. “C’mere.”

“I—I need a minute,” you cried.

You bolted from the living room and went down the hall, gasping for air when you reached the edge of your bed. The room was spinning as you dropped your head in your hands, the nausea surging up inside you the longer you stayed stuck in the memory. You needed out of it; you needed out. You needed—.

Joel rushed into the room, falling to his knees in front of you as he said your name over and over to coax you out of the trance. Nothing was working. Your head was throbbing in pain, and you couldn’t work around it.

“Breathe with me, baby,” Joel whispered. “Breathe.”

You heaved in a lung full of air, only to choke on it and gag back the nausea crawling up your throat. Joel rubbed his hands over your thighs, the sensation of his touch jarring you enough to make you cringe.

“It’s gonna be okay,” he crooned, a distant echo of your dad's words. “It’s okay.”

The shrilling sound of your phone ringing pulled you both from the moment, and you crawled over the bed to grab it.

Beth

“Fuck,” you groaned. “I can’t—I can’t answer it.”

“Give it to me, I’ll do it,” Joel offered with an outstretched hand.

You practically tossed it at him while you crumpled into the sheets with your hands clutching your head.

“Hello?” He answered with a brief pause before he said, “This is Joel.”

Silence.

“Fuck, okay. Gimmie a second,” he replied.

“Baby, she needs to talk to you,” Joel said.

You stifled your cries before taking your phone from his hand, already hearing Beth’s frantic voice on the other end of the receiver.

“Beth, what is it?” You asked, your body shaking.

“It’s dad, sis. You’ve got to come home, okay?”

#joel miller x reader #joel x reader #joel x teacher #joel x f!reader #joel miller #joel miller fanfic #joel miller smut #joel miler tlou #tlou #pre outbreak!joel #the last of us fanfiction #fluff and angst #so much angst

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flippinpancakes64 · 7 months ago

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Hi! So, this is my first ask ever (kinda nervous ngl), but could you please write for the cullens with a succubus reader who is their mate? Maybe they're more like a Jennifer's body succubus? Thank you! (I'm obsessed with your writing btw)

The Cullens with a Succubus! Mate

Omg I remember the first time I did an ask I was like 12 and I was so worried I almost threw up. And then I got diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder so

Anyway it’s been like four or five years since I’ve seen Jennifer’s body but I think I remember enough to do what you wanted.

For anyone who needs a rundown, a succubus is a female demon who visits men while they sleep to engage in sexual activity. Either during or after this, they kill the men by taking their energy or by eating them. The male form is an incubus, but mostly the same premise.

And thank you so much for the kind words! Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

Uhm he’s a little scared

He knows that you won’t hurt him

You have no reason to there’s nothing to gain from killing a vampire, it’s not like you can eat him and he doesn’t have any energy to offput

Doesn’t mean he isn’t a little freaked out

But after he gets over the initial terror he is intrigued

He’s never met a demon before

He’s a scholarly fellow as well, he wants to know everything about you

He is gonna have to ask that you find another way of feeding

He sees your hunting ritual as cheating so yall will need to figure that out

Alice:

Yes sign her up

She loves you

She is so entranced

She thinks you are so beautiful, and she thinks your feeding us is symbolic

And of course she’s not scared of you

She’s not gonna go with you when you feed

But she’s also not gonna ask you to change

She knows that that’s what you need to do, and at the end of the day you come back to her and those guys end up dead so

Jasper:

He’s met a succubus before

He used to think Maria was a succubus tbh

He is a little uneasy

But he gets over himself

Again he thinks it’s so cool that you’re so different

Obv he won’t join you for your hunting

That’s just dangerous for him since he’s trying to not drink human blood

And he doesn’t try to change you at all

Yk that twitter post that’s like “my bitch can do what she wants cause im scared of her”

That’s him

Rosalie:

Yes

100 times yes

She is a man hater (except for Emmett and Carlisle and sometimes Jasper and maybe Edward)

She’s a big fan of your work

And yes she wants to join you

She’s abstained long enough to not really feel the urge to drink from the men you kill

And she doesn’t care about the sexual aspect

She’s the one you come home to so ❤️

She might even have a couple of suggestions for you

“That dude there bumped into me on the street and didn’t apologize let’s go for him next

Emmett:

Yes one million times

We already know he has a thing for powerful women

This is right up his alley

And he isn’t concerned about you killing men, he’s already dead

And if you would have killed him while he was alive he would have died a very happy man

He might go with you sometimes just to laugh at the guy

And he doesn’t care about the sexual aspect either

Again, more of the “you come home with me so it doesn’t matter”

Esme:

She’s very curious

She’s never met a demon, nor did she ever think she would

She isn’t judgmental at first when you tell her about how you eat men

But then she learns about what you do to them beforehand

And yeah she views it as cheating

She’ll ask if you have to do that first, or if you can just eat them

If you can’t change then she will not date you sorry

But she will be your friend

Carlisle:

He has definitely met a succubus before

So he knows what he’s getting into

He views it as more of a necessity

Like he knows how you won’t/can’t change and he wouldn’t ask that of you

He’s very accepting

He won’t go with you tho

What you do in your free time is up to you

Leave him out of the ritual killing please

Vampire! Bella:

She’s a little weirded out

I mean she just learned about vampires and werewolves not too long ago and now there’s other stuff?

She’s over learning

But she thinks it’s super cool

She thinks it’s a bit weird that you have to have sex with them first

So you’re gonna have to explain that it’s not something you can control, it just literally doesn’t work if you don’t

So she understands

I think she’d go with you once or twice just to see what it’s about

But it won’t be a habit of hers

Overall she thinks you’re pretty cool

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toxicanonymity · 2 years ago

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Can you do manhandling Joel, like him throwing her around and also keeping her from trying to escape bc he's too horny to wait and either Tommy or someone is in like the next room or the garage or just outside the door and she's super worried that they're gonna be seen but he has his way with her anyway even though she's trying to fight him off😅🥵

Picnic Table

750 | horny!Joel x reader

SUMMARY: Free Use -> manhandling. Tommy and Maria are on their way over, but Joel is determined to get it in.

A/N: the Joel & Reader from Free Use but can read standalone).

WARNINGS: I8+ dubcon/noncon (read ask) manhandling, PIV sex in public, light degradation/humiliation. unedited

You’re having Tommy & his wife over for a Barbecue and wearing a long flowy sun dress. You’ve finished getting ready for them to come over and take a moment to relax in a lounge chair in the backyard. Joel creeps up behind you and kisses you on the head, slides one of his hands into your dress to cup a breast. ��Mmm,” he says, and squats down next to you.

Joel says, “Know what we forgot to do? Put out the tablecloth and stuff.” When you’re both finished at the picnic table, he sits down and says, “Alright, now we can relax” and pats his lap.

You sit on his lap side-saddle and the edge of your thigh can feel he’s hard. He forcefully pulls your ass further into his lap, grinding you against his manhood like you’re a toy.

“Joel, they’ll be here any minute. . .”

“Tommy’s always late,” he says. “Only take a minute.”

This always feels like gray area in your free use agreement. You don’t mind and even enjoy when he uses your body, but you’re not comfortable with sex in public and he really pushes your boundaries sometimes. It turns you on, but if you ever got caught, you’d never be able to go in public again. You’d be too embarrassed. Joel, on the other hand, doesn’t care. He’d probably be proud. Still, his desperate horniness has you tingling between the legs.

Only take a minute, he says . . .hmm . . . “Promise?”

“C’mere.” He manhandles you into straddling him. You’ll probably have bruises. It’s no use, you stop resisting. Hopefully it really does only take a minute. He unbuckles his belt, takes out his hard cock.

“Fix your dress for me like a good girl,” he says. You make it so you aren’t sitting on your dress, it falls in front of his knees and on top of his lap and covers both of you where it counts. He fingers your dripping pussy and rubs his hard cock along it.

Then you hear a car park in front of the house.

“That’s them.” You try to get up, but he forces you down. His hands are huge and he’s so much stronger than you are. He lets you stand up only enough to get enough clearance for him to find your entrance with his cock, which he does. Then he forces you down on it almost all the way. You gasp as he impales you and you hear Tommy’s car door open.

“Joel, I’m sorry,” you try really hard to stand up. You’re squirming against his strength. He wraps his arms tight around you and pulls you down full-force on his cock and sighs in relief as he does it. It feels amazing, you feel so full, you love how tight his arms are around you, but you’re uncomfortable and afraid.

“Not done,” he growls. He rocks you on top of him and God, it feels good, but no, no, this is bad, Tommy is walking up the driveway and will surely come around the house.

“Joel please,” you squirm again. “Whatever you want later, I promise.”

“No shit,” he says. “And whatever I want right now.”

“He’s right there! Let me up!”

“Not ‘til I’m tricklin’ down your thigh, baby. Stop fightin’ and it’ll be over soon.”

Tommy comes around the side yard, sure enough, and Joel stops rocking you the way he was, but can’t let you out of his lap. Tommy comes right up to the picnic table. You rest your head in the crook of Joel’s neck and say “We were just resting.”

Tommy doen’t seem to buy it, he smirks but lets it go.

“Yeah,” Joel says. “After settin’ the table. Mind grabbin’ the beers from the garage? There’s a cooler of ice in the kitchen for ‘em.”

“Sure bro,” Tommy says knowingly. As soon as he turns around, Joel starts manhandling you on his cock, thrusting up into you as he moves you with one arm tight around you and a big hand on your hip. You twitch and tighten around him, but don't quite come. Then, finally he erupts inside you with a barely audible grunt and breathes a sigh of relief through his nose.

“Alright, baby. Now you can go.”

You hover over his lap for him to put his dick away, then stand up fully and feel the warmth trickle down your thigh. A few drops of cum have dribbled onto Joel’s shorts from where you hovered, but he doesn’t care at all. He’ll wear it proudly.

#free use!joel☠️#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #pervy!joel #perv!joel #horny!joel #horny!joel miller #free use!joel miller #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fic #joel miller fic #pedro pascal #toxicanonymity ☠️#dark!joel miller #dark!joel #free use!joel

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npookie0 · 3 months ago

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Ronin x mc x Angel thoughts???

Angel, devil and a mortal.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Killer chat spoilers

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Ronin was laying in a bed with two people, Y/N was curled up beside him and right beside them was Angel. he chuckled quietly as he was watching the sleeping writer.

"Never thought we would be a thing again, Maria." Ronin looked at the woman who was looking at him.

She chuckled softly and brushed a hand through their hair.

"Yeah... me neither." She scoffed and looked up at Ronin. "Maybe they are what we needed from the beginning?"

"Like someone to keep us in a safe balance?" He shook his head. "Maybe, I don't know. But 's feels nice, having a bad shit crazy cannibal and then a writer as your partners." He smirked when he felt Angel's glare on him.

"Oh, shut up Ronin." She rolled her eyes playfully, unable to hide her smile.

"Awh, you're such a softie." He moved his hand from Y/N's waist and took a strand of Maria's hair between his fingers and twirling them around.

"... Would you ever imagine us being a thing again before meeting them?" Angel asked not protesting against Ronin's playful behaviour.

"No, I thought that being friends was our end, not like it was a bad thing." He paused. "You're... good friend." He said in a softer voice.

"Yeah, you're not too bad either..."

There was a moment of silence between them.

"I'm so fucking glad that they helped you kill that motherfucker." Ronin said, letting Angel's hair go.

"... They really helped me out a lot." She looked down at their sleeping form.

"Wow, where's my credit?" He said sarcastically.

"Guess you helped out too, you emo idiot." She smiled.

Ronin was about to answer but a sudden feeling of lips touching his forehead and then moving away to do the same for Angel stopped him.

"You're not asleep..?" Angel asked.

"You two are talking to loud." They yawned.

"Hah, of course you're a light sleeper." Ronin scoffed and ruffled their hair.

"Thanks Ronin, I really enjoy the free hairdresser treatment." They sighed. "Anyway, you two dummies. I love you two, and will burn this world down if you will want me to. Now sleep, Angel has a photo shoot in the morning, and you need to have enough energy to annoy me."

And with that the three fell asleep, an angel and a devil embracing a human in between them.

#killer chat #killer chat ronin #gender neutral reader #angel killer chat #fanfic #fluff #angel x ronin x reader

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ayrtonswnna · 1 month ago

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helloo, author-chan! Me again hehe 😊😊

I love how you did my request abt Franco x Senna!reader. I really do, it really shows Ayrton's child-ish character (all thanks to the lord and savior, Gerhard Berger) Hehe.

Anyways, I wanna do another request.

It's for Ayrton himself, but the reader is his childhood friend who's goodbyes from him were like a form of betrayal for her accord and cut ties with him for good when she founds out he got married (which i think you know that his wife and him got divorced but then dated gfs here and there, you'll get my point). UNTIL, she was invited to the paddock in one of the races and she doesn't know he was a F1 driver.

Your plot is your own free will but make it STRAIGHT ANGST to Forgiving at the end, that is if you can ofc. No pressure 😊😊.

Good Luck, Author-chan 😘

ʚɞ a/n: more ayrton content yessss!!!! hey sweetheart, thank you very much!!!!! i am sorry for taking so long to finish your request, but here it is!!

i tried my best to embody your request (and take the challenge) and keep as much as i could of your ideas, added a lot for context and got a bit carried away, but i think it turned out great.

i'm head over heels for angst so here it is!!! hope you like it and thank you for your support!!!!

⠀⠀⠀⠀A LONG TIME COMING 〃 ayrton senna oneshot

ʚɞ ayrton senna x maria de oliveira. (female!oc)

ayrton sees his past right in front of him. a lot has changed.

warnings: ANGST. A LOT OF IT. story takes place in the late 80s/early 90s, it's up to you, author opened wikepedia and chose the first old man in power to be the villain, description of an abusive relationship, character physically and mentally hurt, ayrton saves the day, mention of non-active character death, author in need of therapy (she's picturing dead man as a savior)

Ayrton recognized her the moment he saw her. It wasn’t just her face—it was the memories she brought with her. Childhood afternoons spent running through São Paulo streets, teenage years filled with laughter and long conversations. All of it came rushing back in a heartbeat.

But she had changed.

The tight coils her mother used to braid into intricate hairstyles were now softer curls, looser and more subdued—maybe she straightened her hair sometimes. Gone were the colorful clothes and wide, carefree smiles. In their place were sharp heels, a tailored blazer, and muted tones. It was strange, seeing someone so familiar and yet so different. Could a person change so much and still remain the same?

"Do you know her?"

The question jolted Ayrton from his thoughts. The voice belonged to Jo Ramirez, McLaren’s team coordinator, who was sitting beside him and following his line of sight.

"Who?" Ayrton asked, though he already knew.

"Maria. My girlfriend."

The word hit him like a slap. Girlfriend?

"I—uh—yeah," Ayrton stammered, struggling to keep his tone casual. "Her mom’s Brazilian. Friends with my family. Something like that."

He hesitated before adding, "Isn’t she much younger? Like... twenty-five?"

Twenty-five. Ayrton knew her exact age, knew she’d turn twenty-six on November 3rd. He remembered everything. Her mom from Rio de Janeiro, her dad from England. Their parents’ business ties that had brought them together so often they practically grew up as siblings—until they weren’t anymore.

Until he left.

Jo chuckled, clearly finding the question amusing. "Yeah, something like that. But what’s it to you?"

Ayrton’s lips pressed into a thin line. Jo Ramirez was fifty. Fifty years old. Ayrton thought he knew Maria better than this, thought she’d never go down that road. A man twice her age, with a background so different from hers.

"I mean," Ayrton pressed, "she’s young enough to be your daughter. Don’t you... don’t you find it weird?"

Jo smirked, leaning back in his chair. "No, not at all. That’s the beauty of it. I can put her in her place. However I want to."

The words set off alarm bells in Ayrton’s head, a sinking feeling twisting in his gut. His face must have given him away because Jo laughed, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Relax, man. It’s not what you think. She’s not a kid. And besides," Jo added, his tone turning smug, "you don’t know her anymore. People change."

Ayrton’s gaze shifted back to Maria, standing at the edge of the garage, her expression unreadable. She seemed lost in her own thoughts, her body tense like she didn’t belong there.

Jo’s next words were like knives.

"These girls, man... they’re like having a personal doll. A private paradise. You do what you want, whenever you want. She doesn’t even complain anymore."

Ayrton snapped his head toward him. "What the fuck, Jo? Are you—are you hearing yourself? What the fuck are you even saying?"

Jo just laughed again, as if Ayrton’s reaction was a joke. "Chill out, mate. It’s my girlfriend. None of your business."

But Ayrton couldn’t shake the sick feeling in his stomach. His gaze flicked back to Maria, and for a fleeting moment, their eyes met.

Ayrton’s mind raced, trying to process Jo’s callous words. The jovial tone, the dismissive attitude — it all felt too wrong. He couldn't believe that the Maria he once knew, the vibrant and spirited girl who used to run through the streets of São Paulo with him, could be subjected to this kind of treatment.

The words "personal doll" and "private paradise" echoed in his head, making his stomach churn. They didn’t fit with the Maria he remembered. His Maria, full of life and laughter, had been an equal, not someone who could be reduced to such an object.

“I guess you’re right,” Ayrton said, forcing a casual tone, even as every fiber of his being screamed in protest. “People change.”

Jo laughed again, patting Ayrton on the shoulder. “Exactly. Don’t worry about it.”

As soon as Jo turned his attention elsewhere, Ayrton’s eyes found Maria’s once more. She was standing at the edge of the garage, her body tense, her eyes distant. The sight of her made his heart ache. What had happened to her?

Maria had always been so alive, so full of personality. This version of her seemed almost foreign, like a ghost of the woman he used to know.

It wasn’t just the physical changes. Sure, she had grown into herself, but it was more than that. It was in the way she moved, the way her eyes shifted, constantly looking around, searching for something or someone. She was no longer the carefree girl from their shared past.

Maria hadn’t come to the paddock for him, not really. She was here because of Jo, and she had no intention of rekindling old memories. Her posture was stiff, her eyes flicking nervously, never settling. Ayrton felt the weight of that discomfort in his chest. This wasn’t how he imagined seeing her again.

"An elder?" Jo’s voice broke through Ayrton’s thoughts, pulling him back to the moment. The tone was playful, but there was something off about it. He squeezed Maria's side, just like he had when they were teenagers, poking into her space with a familiarity that made Ayrton uncomfortable. "C’mon, Mariazinha, you’re better than that! I can't believe I'm seeing you again. What happened to your hair? You’ve changed so much!"

Maria’s eyes darkened, and her response was cold, detached. "Grew old, I guess."

Ayrton took a small step back, unsure of how to continue. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. There should have been more. More warmth, more recognition of the bond they once shared. But instead, there was this distance, this wall.

"Yes, could be it," Ayrton murmured. "How are you? How’s mamãe?" He used the term of endearment without thinking, but immediately regretted it. The word felt too intimate for the way things had turned out.

"Watching from above," Maria answered softly, her voice thick with an emotion Ayrton couldn’t place. She took a step away from him, eyes darting around as if looking for Jo.

Ayrton felt a pang of guilt. "I am so sorry," he said, reaching out to her but pulling back when he saw the way she flinched. "Was it... Was it recent? I passed by your house just last week."

Her eyes were cold now, and it stung. "Seven years ago."

Ayrton’s heart sank. He had missed so much. And Maria had been forced to pick up the pieces of a life that he had left behind.

"So, dad?" Ayrton asked, trying to change the subject, his mind reeling. "Bet you’re in England more these days, with Jo and everything."

Maria nodded, but her expression didn’t soften. "Yeah, I guess."

Ayrton noticed the tension in her shoulders, the way she couldn’t quite meet his eyes. There was something in the air between them, something thick and unresolved. "It’s weird, though," he said, trying to ease the situation. "I would’ve never guessed you’d grow into such a quiet adult. You were always so... vocal."

Maria's lips twitched. "I guess life has a way of changing things."

Her words stung, and Ayrton knew they were aimed at him. He had left her. He had walked away without a second thought. And now, all these years later, he was standing in front of a woman who had learned to live without him.

"You found a wife and left," she said, her voice tinged with bitterness. "It’s not like you stayed to know what I’d grow into."

Ayrton winced, his own guilt rising up to choke him. "Yeah, I... I deserve that." He ran a hand through his hair. "I made mistakes. But I’m really happy to see you again. Maybe we could catch up, catch up like old times?"

Maria didn't respond immediately, her gaze flicking toward Jo in the distance. She seemed to hesitate before shaking her head. "I don’t think so. You can’t just leave and come back when you feel like it. This is not how it works. I put my life together without you, and I don’t want to go through that again. It’s already too—" She paused, her throat tightening.

"Too what?" Ayrton pressed, his heart racing. "You put your life together with a fifty-year-old man who talks about you like you're a piece of meat? I don’t understand. I don’t think I’m the complicated part in this."

Maria stepped closer to him, her face flushed with frustration. "Aren’t you also fucking young blond women all around? Why is my life suddenly your business? Jo was here for me when you turned your back on me. I don’t care how he talks, or how complicated it is. He was the one who showed up for me when you didn’t."

Ayrton stood there, his mind racing, but all he could focus on was the bruise on her neck. It was dark, swollen, and fresh. Something inside him snapped.

"Maria... What the fuck?" He reached out to touch her, his hand trembling as he took in the full extent of the mark. "Is this ok? What the hell happened?"

Maria flinched as his fingers brushed the bruise, but she didn’t pull away. Instead, she tried to cover it up, pulling her blazer back in place and stepping further away from him.

"I’m fine, stop acting like you care," she said, trying to sound convincing. But it didn’t fool Ayrton.

He couldn’t just stand there and pretend everything was fine. He wasn’t blind to what was happening. He wasn’t going to let this go.

But before he could say anything else, Jo appeared, his voice dripping with possessiveness. "Maria, my love. Looks like you’re catching up with your old friend, huh? I bet he wasn’t all that when you met."

Maria didn’t even look at him as she pulled away, muttering a quiet goodbye. "I’m going back to the hotel, alright? Meet me there, baby."

Jo gave a lazy wave, clearly disinterested, before turning his focus back on Ayrton. "Don’t you dare try anything between me and my girlfriend. You’re my driver, and I call the shots. It’s best you keep your distance from her."

Ayrton didn’t say anything. There was no point. Jo had made his stance clear. He just nodded, but inside, his mind was on Maria and the danger she was in.

"Copy."

It's not like anyone is in control of the situation. It's not like Ayrton could just close his eyes and get to sleep. It's past ten, and there’s no sign of sleep.

Facing Maria after so many years brought a scary amount of new things to the table. Things he thought he had buried as time passed and could live with that way.

But no. Just like his first year alone in the UK, right after Lilian, his wife at the time, dropped him saying she couldn’t keep up with this whole career thing. Just like when he caught himself thinking about how things would have been so different with Maria.

They had history, a background. High school lovebirds and childhood inseparable duo.

Ayrton remembered their weekends together, the ones when she was not traveling to her dad's house. The way she was so bad at speaking Portuguese and would always ask him for translations once he learned English. They took classes together throughout their whole childhood. They used to do everything together.

Karting, beach days, countryside days, summer travels. Birds of a feather, inseparable duo. All the shared birthday parties, the shared beds, breakfasts, school rides. High school years, teenage experiences.

It all seems to come back now. The best and the worst.

Because now Maria is hurt. Physically hurt, probably emotionally too. The sweetest girl he once knew is now hidden in layers of clothing and sharp answers.

It's impossible not to think about the what-ifs.

What if he never left her? What if he had proposed she move to the UK with him and not Lilian? She had a family there, maybe it would have worked out. What if he didn’t kiss her in his parent's backyard for one last time?

These are the type of things that keep men up at night, awake enough to go down to the hotel lobby to maybe get some tea and tire themselves out before sleeping.

As Ayrton descended to the hotel lobby, the dim lighting and soft hum of quiet conversations brought a strange sense of calm. He wasn’t expecting anyone to be there, let alone her.

But there she was, sitting on a leather armchair near the bar, staring at a half-empty glass of wine like it held all the answers to her life.

His feet moved before his brain could stop him. "Maria?"

She startled slightly, her eyes snapping up to meet his. For a second, Ayrton saw the girl he used to know—soft, wide-eyed, and vulnerable. But it disappeared as quickly as it came, replaced by the guarded, distant woman she had become.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her voice low and tired.

"Couldn’t sleep," he admitted, sliding into the armchair beside her. "And you?"

She scoffed, swirling the wine in her glass. "Guess I couldn’t either."

The silence between them felt heavy, weighed down by years of unresolved feelings and the awkwardness of their earlier conversation. Ayrton couldn’t help but notice how she sat, her posture tense, as if ready to bolt at the first sign of trouble.

"Maria," he started softly, leaning forward, "I need to ask you something, and I need you to be honest with me."

She froze, her fingers tightening around the glass.

"Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn’t I be?"

"Coming from what I saw earlier..." he said carefully, his eyes never leaving hers. "And the way you flinched when I tried to touch you. Maria, you don’t have to pretend with me."

Her lips parted, but no words came out. Instead, she looked away, her gaze fixed on the floor. "It’s not what you think."

"It’s exactly what I think," Ayrton said, his tone firm but not unkind. "I’ve known you my whole life, Maria. You don’t have to say it, but I see it. And I know you don’t deserve it."

She laughed bitterly, shaking her head. "What do you know about what I deserve, Ayrton? You left. You walked away like I was nothing. You don’t get to come back now and act like you care."

"I never stopped caring," he said, his voice breaking slightly. "I was stupid, Maria. I made mistakes. But I swear to you, if I’d known—"

"You didn’t," she interrupted, her tone sharp. "You didn’t know because you didn’t stay."

He fell silent, his guilt weighing heavily on him. She had every right to be angry, and he had no defense. But he couldn’t walk away from her again, not now.

"Let me fix it," he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper. "Whatever it takes, Maria. Just let me help you."

She looked at him then, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "There's nothing to fix, Ayrton. You can’t undo what’s already been done."

"Maybe not," he admitted, "but I can give you a way out. You don’t have to stay with him. You don’t have to live like this."

Maria swallowed hard, her hands trembling as she set the glass down. "It’s not how it works, Ayrton, this is not-"

"It is," Ayrton insisted. "You just have to trust me."

A few days later, the team had planned an evening out—a casual dinner to celebrate a successful race weekend. Maria had reluctantly agreed to join, knowing Jo would insist on her presence. Ayrton was there too, his eyes never straying far from her.

Throughout the evening, Jo’s behavior was increasingly abrasive. He held her arm tightly when guiding her to their table, his fingers digging into her skin. He interrupted her when she spoke, belittling her opinions with condescending remarks. Ayrton watched it all, his jaw tightening with every interaction.

The breaking point came when Jo grabbed her wrist in the middle of a conversation, yanking her back toward him. "Stop wandering off," he snapped, his tone low but menacing.

Maria winced, her free hand instinctively moving to cover her wrist. That's not much of him—acting that way where everyone could see it. "Jo," she said evenly, her voice trying to stay calm but laced with a tiny sign of desperation. "Not now."

Promptly, her eyes darted to Ayrton, as if something inside knew he'd be looking. And there he was.

The thing is, Maria isn't the only one who noticed that.

Jo smirked, releasing her as if nothing had happened. "Relax, Ayrton. She’s fine."

But Ayrton wasn’t fooled. His eyes locked with Maria’s, silently communicating what words couldn’t. Later, when the group began to disperse, he caught her arm gently, steering her toward a quiet corner of the parking lot.

"You don’t have to go back with him," he said, his voice urgent. "Get in my car. I’ll take you somewhere safe."

She hesitated, her eyes darting around as if expecting Jo to appear out of nowhere. "I can’t just leave. He’ll—"

"I don’t care what he’ll do," Ayrton interrupted. "You’re not staying with him another night, Maria. I won’t let you."

Her lips trembled, tears spilling over as she whispered, "It's not like... It's not like I can just leave."

"It is," Ayrton said, his voice softening. He cupped her face gently, his thumbs brushing away her tears. "But you’re not alone. I’m here, Maria. I’ve got you."

For a moment, she just stared at him, the weight of her fear and pain threatening to consume her. But then she nodded, a small, shaky movement that sealed her decision.

"Okay," she whispered.

Without another word, Ayrton led her to his car, opening the passenger door for her. As they drove away, the city lights fading behind them, Maria felt a strange sense of relief. For the first time in years, she wasn’t running away—she was being saved.

The sound of the sea outside Ayrton’s beach house was a gentle hum, blending seamlessly with the rhythmic clink of a knife against a cutting board. Maria sat across from him in the kitchen, chopping fruit for a simple breakfast. Ayrton, leaning casually against the counter, pretended to be busy with a task, though his eyes kept drifting to her.

There’s no race this weekend, and he felt like they could use a break. She would never deny a good beach weekend, and it only took a flight.

"This is just like old times," she said softly, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Except now, you’re actually helping instead of sneaking bites every five minutes."

He grinned, playfully snatching a slice of mango from her plate. "Old habits die hard, don’t they?"

She swatted his hand away, laughing lightly, and for a moment, the heaviness that had lingered between them since that night at the hotel seemed to lift.

"So," he started, his tone deliberately casual, "how did you end up in... all of this? I mean, I know about your mom, but... Jo?"

Her smile faltered, and she set the knife down, her fingers idly tracing the edge of the cutting board. "I left Brazil not long after she passed. It was... too much. The house felt empty, and São Paulo didn’t feel like home anymore. I thought a fresh start would help. Then I moved in with Dad, in London."

Ayrton nodded, his expression softening. "Makes sense. You wanted to escape the memories."

Of course! Here's the complete passage, maintaining the original dialogues:

She looked up at him, her eyes glassy but steady. “Exactly. But I didn’t realize that running away wouldn’t fix anything. Jo came into my life when I was at my weakest. He knew what to say, how to act... At first, it felt like he was saving me. I didn’t see it for what it was until it was too late.”

His jaw tightened, and his hands clenched the edge of the counter. “You deserved so much more than that, Maria.”

She offered a sad smile. “I thought I did too. But by the time I realized who he really was, I didn’t know how to get out.”

There was a long pause, filled only by the distant crash of waves. Ayrton walked around the counter and sat beside her, his shoulder brushing hers. “You don’t have to go through that again,” he said quietly. “Not ever.”

Maria looked at him, her eyes searching his face. “You’ve always been like this, haven’t you? Saying just the right thing to make me feel... safe.”

He smirked, leaning in slightly. “It’s a gift. Though I recall you used to say I talked too much.”

She laughed, a genuine sound that made his chest tighten, in the best of ways. “You did. You still do.”

Their laughter faded, leaving a charged silence between them. Ayrton’s hand was on the table, so close to hers that their fingers nearly touched. For a fleeting moment, he thought about closing the gap, about leaning in, about finally—

Maria shifted, clearing her throat and breaking the spell. “We should finish this before the fruit turns to mush.”

Ayrton exhaled sharply, a mix of frustration and amusement. “Right. Breakfast. Very important.”

Later, the sun was dipping low over the horizon when they found themselves on the beach. Maria walked ahead of him, her bare feet sinking into the sand, until she reached the water’s edge. She sat where the waves kissed the shore, her knees pulled to her chest, her arms wrapped around them.

Ayrton stopped a few paces behind her, watching. She always used to do this — sit right where the ocean seemed to meet her. She used to say it made her feel small, but in a good way. Like her problems couldn’t possibly be bigger than the vast sea stretching out before her.

“You’re still doing that,” he said as he sat down beside her.

She glanced at him, her hair tousled by the breeze. “Doing what?”

“Sitting here like this. You’ve always loved the water.”

Maria shrugged, a small smile playing on her lips. “Some things don’t change, I guess.”

They sat in silence for a moment, the sound of the waves filling the space between them. Ayrton shifted closer, his shoulder brushing hers.

“You know,” he began, his voice low and steady, “I wasn’t there for you when I should’ve been. But I swear, Maria, I won’t let anything like Jo happen again. Not as long as I’m around.”

She turned to him, her eyes wide and shining with something he couldn’t quite name. “Ayrton...”

He reached up, tucking a stray curl behind her ear. The gesture was so simple, so natural, that it felt like slipping back into something they’d never really left behind. Slowly, he leaned in, their foreheads almost touching.

This time, Maria didn’t pull away. Their lips met in a kiss that was soft, hesitant, yet filled with unspoken promises. When they parted, Ayrton rested his forehead against hers, his hand still lingering near her face.

“Things can change,” he murmured. “We can change.”

Maria smiled, the first real, unguarded smile he’d seen from her in years. “Maybe they can.”

They stayed there, the waves crashing softly around them, as the sun sank below the horizon, painting the sky with hues of orange and pink.

ʚïɞ check my masterlist 〃 drop a request 〃 featuring ayrton! ʚïɞ ayrtonswnna, 2025

#formula 1 #f1 #formula one #formula one imagine #f1 imagine #imagine #f1 angst #formula 1 angst #ayrton senna imagine #ayrton senna angst #ayrton senna x oc #ayrton senna x reader #classic f1 #vintage f1 #mclaren #as12 #lele writes ʚɞ

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spookykoolkat · 1 year ago

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the red j.m. | chapter four

CHAPTER FOUR: NO GOOD

series masterlist | main masterlist |

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

chapter summary: you've been in jackson for a month now and things are still a little rough. you haven't found the right crowd to fit into yet, and thought maybe you might have to settle for the family of four you already know, until you meet your patrol partner, tyler. unfortunately, joel doesn't seem to like the idea of you with any other man but him.

warnings: 18+ age gap (joel is 57, reader is turning 26), inappropriate thoughts, sexual language, teasing, touching, slight jealous!joel, x-rated descriptions, crude language, perv!joel, creepy!joel, mean joel not too mean tho, MDNI!!!

wc: 6.2k

na: HI! thank you for alllll of the love oh my god my little gothic heart is so full i love you guys!!! i hope this series is everything and more to you guys bc i love this so much! hopefully as chapters go by, i get better in my writing and hope everyone enjoys it! i appreciate all of your kind words and interactions with me and making me feel welcome since i am new to writing on tumblr and kind of took a six year break from writing oneshots/fanfictions LOL. anyways please enjoy this chapter things are g3tting a little hot and heavy :P I CANT WAITT i hope that my writing is cathartic for my big girls we do not get enough representation for us in stories and writings!please enjoy! smut coming soon fr fr LMFAOO

i appreciate all reblogs, likes and comments feel free to do any one of those things or ALL! if u think its deserved :P

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DECEMBER 21ST, 2024

YOU

you’ve been in jackson for a month now. you couldn’t believe it, you truly had every doubt about staying even a week. but, it’s probably the calmest life you’ve lived in a very long time. you enjoyed it and you truly felt you’d made the right decision, it didn’t take much convincing either. but, you still haven’t unpacked the items maria gave you and continues to give you. just in case.

the neighbors are learning your name, as you are with them, and they actually care. as much as you let them. you felt quite bad because you found yourself still not clicking with anyone around you. and you’ve tried. the people your age find you boring, almost a dark cloud over them, bursting their bubbles. younger kids only approach you because of ellie, asking for advice on stance and grip. the older group, around tommy and joel’s age, finds you a bit much.

your language, your lack of social awareness–sometimes it gets embarrassing. saying something old heads wouldn’t necessarily like, being too blunt and a little explicit. joel figured you should hang around your age group, yet you didn’t really click in with the rest. he was far from embarrassed being around you, you just said the things he was thinking out loud.

you only found yourself clicking with joel. in many ways, as much as he let you. he was standoffish most of the time, barely cracking a smile at your weird habits and the noises you make when you’re passed out on the couch. he refused to let you break him, this wall that he had up to survive. do not get attached. he thought, maybe the less he knew you the less it’d hurt to have anything happen to you. but it seems even as little as he does know you, he’s still feeling that tug at his heart laying his eyes on you.

it was too late. whoops.

joel doesn’t want to address that feeling, and he doesn’t want to call it as it is. he actually cares about you. he had no choice but to call it that, because why else would he lie to you about finding cassettes in the house?— so that you didn’t know what he really did to get you whatever he could get his hands on.

he didn’t want you to know that he actually smuggled in goods that he and his family needed, and while bribing, stealing, trading and selling for necessities, he made it a mission to find at least one cassette tape for you. he didn’t know you actually saw him red handed, and you still didn’t know where those boxes were coming from. he figured if you knew, you’d bring it up.

he made it his mission for two whole weeks, after your first week of staying with him, and finally got his hands on some actual music for you. joel hadn’t made efforts like this in a long time, and he knew that denying the fact that he at least cared for you would mean he was being delusional.

but he was always worried about you. you were his object of affection and he craved to find a way to get you out of his mind. he actually felt guilty for thinking about you in ways you’ve probably never been before, he felt guilty for wanting nothing but to make you feel good—however that was.

you doubted it strongly of course, shaking the feeling off as your own delusion and insanity, but you always hoped. hoped that maybe his generosity and southern hospitality was actually him caring about you in a different way, but he was a grown man. you tried to off yourself in front of him–you were insane to think he’d even look at you as anything but a liability, he hardly looked your way as it was.

at least you thought so.

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joel paid attention to every single thing he sees and hears. he doesn’t show it, he doesn’t acknowledge it—all he does is observe. some more than others.

you didn’t talk to him unless he talked to you, you kept your distance like he wanted, but somehow he knew everything that was going on. he didn’t have to talk to you to know you, and that’s what he was ashamed of. he watched you.

he was a creep, he felt like someone who was abnormal and making things weirder than they had to be. he was studying you and you didn’t even know. he picked up on what made you smile, which cassettes you listened to the most, which just so happened to be the ones he was ‘holding on to.’ and in the midst of observing you, he checked you out any time he got.

when you weren’t looking mostly, but even sometimes when you were talking to him about something not so important. he realized that if you did see that his eyes wandered over you, you were probably gaslighting yourself into thinking he wasn’t doing exactly what you thought he was doing. he loved your body. and he loved the way you dressed your body, the way the shirts you wore always clung to your heavy breasts, how even when you dressed in baggy clothes he still wanted to ruin you like that.

sick. you’re a sick old pervert, ya kno’ that? he knew. what joel didn’t know is why you made him feel this way, why you drove him to do the things that he does for you. why he acted feral every time you bent over, why he would storm out of the room when you got on your hands and knees to pick something you dropped up off the floor.

but he also studied you because he wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling how you felt the night you woke up in jackson, to make sure you weren’t feeling depressed or like you didn’t want to be here anymore. just talk to her fucker. he couldn’t. he would never admit it, but he’s eavesdropped near ellie’s garage to hear conversations between the two girls.

“ellie, i mean it, you cannot tell joel.” you hushed as you glanced towards the door, back to ellie.

she scoffed. “like i’d tell him, lay it on me.” you noticed the irritation in her eyes when you brought up joel, asking yourself if maybe there was something that wasn’t being said. you just put a pin in it.

“okay. one, i’m finally allowed a gun and i got my patrol route.” you cheered in a hush and joel almost pressed his ear into the door.

ellie rolled her eyes, grabbing the piece of paper. “no fucking fair. good looks, telling me bad news first. what’s two?” she joked.

“i met my patrol partner. his name’s uh, tyler? i think. yeah,” you looked down and nodded, assuring yourself. joel made it a note to tell ellie how thin her walls were, not right now though.

“tyler… tyler m?” joel thought of every man in this town named tyler with the letter M as his last name. instantly made a mental list of five tylers.

“i don’t know. but he asked me for a drink. tonight, he was gonna meet me here but i told him i’d meet him there. lesson number 5, always have a way to leave anywhere you are if you need to.” you said. you figured it’d be best to teach her as much as you could, telling her things she needed to hear to survive.

that’s how joel knew immediately what was happening when he heard your soft singing from your cracked door. you were getting ready for him. he actually hated it. he couldn’t remember the last time he felt that heat in his chest, biting the tongue—it wasn’t until his face turned down into the old familiar feeling, what he recognized as jealousy.

who was he to be jealous? for what? it was a saturday night, most people were off of work, and everyone was settling in the town’s circle to drink and watch movies. everyone but joel. he was now classified as a bitter old man, with a dark whiskey in his glass. maybe now a bitter, creepy old man as he knocks slightly on the cracked door and you invite him in.

you were fixing the laces on your shoes, simple black converse, and his eyes made his way up from there to your face. a deep v neck shirt that looked like a second skin from how tight it was, and faded black jeans with tiny holes from being lived in that hugged the fat of your thighs. he never noticed the gold dainty necklace that sat in the middle of your chest, but it sits right between the curves of your breasts. were they always that big? he felt like a kid, ogling and asking stupid questions.

“hellooo? joel?” you called to him as you rested your palms on the width of your thighs. he saw your lips, coated in a sheen and your hair split down the middle instead of being in a pony tail or bun. creepy old man. you’re being creepy joel!!! he shook his head.

“headin’ to the circle?” he asked. if he were close enough you could smell the whiskey on his breath.

“yeah i-,” you thought for a minute. joel didn’t trust the next person as much as you did. you saw his protectiveness through ellie, you felt maybe he’d feel the same for you. even if you were a bit delusional.

“-was gonna catch a movie with ellie, most likely be back around 12.” you said as you glanced at the clock, 9:32.

“‘s that right?” he said suggestively, like he knew something you didn’t. he did.

“yeah. that’s right,” you stood firm, even shot him a dirty look. “why don’t you enjoy the night, joel. you got the house to yourself, ain’t that what you’ve been mopin’ around for?” you stood up and grabbed your gun to put in your waistband behind your shirt, sticking a knife in your high top converse and one in your jean pocket.

maybe you got too defensive, but you were right in a way. he looked miserable around the house, storming in just to grab a beer and lock himself in the library or room.

“that’s right,” he was just smug. so smug you couldn’t stand it, you wanted to slap him.

“whatever joel,” you wanted to be right so bad. you wanted to prove to even yourself that you were right. but neither of you were buying into this act you played, and you knew it. he was making you nervous with his stare, the hard shell you had was practically ripped off of you when he grabbed your wrist before you left the room. he held you, shoulder to shoulder and looked at your face, down your neck and to your chest.

“if you need anythin’, you let me know darlin’.” darlin’? it was so foreign to you, so alien that you didn’t even have time to process it before your mouth moved to say a small alright and taking your arm from his grip. when you did, it was cold and you could feel the print of his hand around your wrist down the stairs.

it was so different, something that leaked off of his words when he spoke to you. and you wanted to hear more of it, explore that with him.

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before you could psych yourself out of going through the bar’s doors, you heard someone call for your name and turned your head to the left to see tyler, walking towards you with a big grin on his face. tyler was just two years older than you, someone you met while you were in combat and patrol classes, and didn’t acknowledge until he approached you, re-introducing himself as your partner for the first two weeks. you couldn’t be cold and shoo him away, you just smiled and introduced yourself, really looking at him.

he was not joel miller. tyler’s skin wasn’t as tan as joel’s but he wasn’t pale, and he was actually a bit lanky even under the thick coats he layered. you noticed that his chest wasn’t as broad and strong as joel’s, hell his arms were smaller than yours. he was a skinny tall thing, while you were a bit short and thick everywhere. and when he embraced you lightly at the entrance of the bar, you just felt cold. no warmth, no comfort, you felt like you’d break him.

“hey, i was hoping you’d actually come.” he breathed in as he pulled away, still, it wasn’t feeling right.

“why wouldn’t i?”

“cause you’re out of my league,” he said with a seductive smile and you wanted to believe him. wanted to enjoy the night as it comes and maybe have a few drinks, talk. but your mind was on a bitter man who sat in a house all by his lonesome.

the thing about ‘dates’ now is that small talk doesn’t happen anymore. what’s your mom like? she’s dead actually. really? mine too! it was pointless. if you ended up here, you knew that you were alone.

it wasn’t long before you and tyler were sitting on two stools, side by side. your knees were in between his as the two of you talked, flirted, gave simple touches. you were having fun. doing what would seem normal at a bar, just enjoying the company of someone who actually liked you.

“how come you’ve never hung out with anyone else? i never see you with anyone.” he said, his fingers tapping on your knee.

“mmm, i’m just not for everyone.” you flirted, covering his fingers with yours. you knew this wasn’t going anywhere, but you’d like to live in it just a little longer. the touch of a man, someone who desired you even if it wasn’t how you wanted. something you started to crave from joel.

“maybe you’re just for me then?” he suggested, and you decided to just play into it. it was kind of hard not to when you were thinking of joel, you needed to act out on it.

“i doubt that, honey,” you said, tugging at the collar of his shirt. he smelled like tequila and grass, something not that appealing but you ignore it. you wanted something out of him tonight, because for some reason the words joel spoke to you kept ringing in your ears. if you need anything, you let me know darlin’. the words rumbled through your body and straight to your core, because if there’s anything you need he could definitely be of help.

you didn’t know how long you stayed at this bar, teasing and touching each other until you felt the ache in your core, aching for a touch that you’ve had once before. but you didn’t give a shit about purity or virginity, you wanted the ache gone and you knew tyler was the best bet.

“tyler,” you whispered in his ear as the bar started to empty.

“yes, beautiful?” he answered and slid his hand up your thigh.

“show me how good you are with your fingers, yeah?”

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he followed you back to joel’s, hand in hand as you turned the key to the house and softly opened the door to prevent the creaking. granted, you didn’t think this through, like everything else. maybe you should’ve gone to his. you cringed a bit, walking inside.

it was dark inside, nothing but the sizzle of a freshly put out fire. you put your fingers to your lips to shush him, taking him slowly upstairs and to your room. you couldn’t help but find yourself glancing at joel’s door, which is cracked open.

you finally made it to your room with the lanky man groping your body and trying to slither you out of your jeans, letting him.

“only want your fingers, okay? if not you can leave.” you established as you stood in your panties and tight shirt.

“fuck, yeah that’s okay,” tyler himself was craving a woman’s touch, he didn’t even care if he got off. he just wanted to see you, a woman’s body, to feel you.

“can i touch you? like anywhere?” he asked as he sat on the edge of your bed, his cock already hardened against his pants. it didn’t sound right coming from him. you wondered what it’d sound like with the texas twang you craved to hear from a certain man.

it still made your core twinge a bit, remembering the last time you were this vulnerable. you couldn’t lie, even if it wasn’t what you wanted, you fell in to the odd touch of the man desperately trying to touch you.

“anywhere. keep your dick in your pants, i’ll touch as i go if you want me to.” you moved over to him and crawled into your bed, and he slipped in next to you as he propped himself on his elbow to look at you.

“you’re so pretty, really.” he said, genuinely and you smiled. your stomach even fluttered a bit. it’s been a long time hearing that, hearing desire.

“touch me, please.”

tyler took his time, a little more than you’d liked but he was busy distracted with the way your tits pushed up to your chin, like you were suffocating. touching and teasing, his touch felt good but it still didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel heartstopping. maybe you’re expecting too much.

but he didn’t talk to you when he dipped his hand in your panties, you just heard his whimpers and panting as he rutted his hard on into the side of your fat thigh, barely focused on you. you weren’t feeling it anymore, your wetness wasn’t even directed towards him really. everything you did with him was what you wanted to do with joel. you weren’t interested anymore and it started to feel wrong, it never felt good because tyler wasn’t worried about you. just his nut, and you didn’t like that. you didn’t like to feel used.

“okay, wait, wait—i said wait!” you said and grabbed his wrist, pulling it from your panties and moving off of the bed.

“wait, fuck i’m sorry, i was just so, fuck i’m so sorry.” he said a bit loudly, and you swore you heard a creak in the hallway as you moved to the door.

“it’s okay, i just, i’m not–i’m tired. i think you should go.” you said, hugging your arm as he adjusted himself in his pants and got up.

“i’m sorry, i,-” he tried again and you waved him off.

“it’s done and forgotten, you didn’t do anything you were just really into it. i wasn’t.” you were careful with your words, not as tough as you would be because you’re vulnerable. but he wouldn’t get far if he hurt you, you knew that.

“i’m sorry, goodnight. can we kind of like, forget this?” he asked rubbing the back of his neck and you softly laughed.

“forget what?” you smiled and he returned it, giving a small kiss on the cheek before he left. he was a nice man, a good kid, and he meant no harm. he didn’t need a ruthless beating or yelling, just needed to tell him it wasn’t meant to be. you couldn’t shake the feeling of how wrong it was, how wrong it felt being tyler touching you.

you knew who you wanted to touch you. as sweet and kind and charming tyler was, he wasn’t what you wanted. the man you wanted was across the hall from you, on the other side of the stairs. sleeping, maybe.

you knew ellie was at a friends house doing only god knows what, so with the hope in mind that joel was asleep in his room, you trotted downstairs braless, and bottomless. you were still in the same tight shirt you left in, but now just in the pink panties that were apart of the gifts maria got you. just new/traded clothing you needed. the shirt hugged you and cut off at the dip of your curve, the fat of your tummy slightly protruding between the shirt and your panties.

you didn’t look towards the fireplace where the sofas were, instead you grab a small cup and let faucet water pour into it, taking a drink.

“work up a sweat?” a deep southern voice said behind you, from a distance. you jumped at the sudden break of silence and turned quickly to the sofas.

“joel? what the fuck,” you breathed and stepped out to walk to the sofas. somehow, you completely disregarded the fact that all you had on was a shirt and panties, standing in joel miller’s living room.

“what made you think it was a bright idea to invite a bastard in my home like that? not only that,” he said. you finally saw the light from outside shining on his face as he stood up, something glimmering in his hand. a gun. “but letting him touch all over you? that prick?”

you had a lot to say, a lot to yell out. but the only thing to say was a snarky comment. “you know he called you the same thing.”

which, he did. but you were too drunk on the flirting and drinks to care or to know why, even though you already knew. joel wasn’t nice to anyone but ellie. tommy and maria even think he’s an asshole, but that’s tommy’s brother and maria’s brother in law. he’s family. but there were things that you didn’t know about joel miller. things he didn’t want you to know either.

“why do you even care? who’s touching me, i mean.” you scoff, feeling less embarrassed about your state of clothing. but being a lot more aware as he steps closer and closer to your curvy figure, putting his gun in the waistband of his sweatpants.

he was intimidating like this. towering over you with his fists clenched, searching your face for something. you felt your heartbeat pick up as his eyes raked over you and fell on your lips. he was drunk off of you, the sight of your fat cunt only being clothed by a single piece of fabric drove him to dig his nails in his palms. the nakedness of your thighs, and the midriff showing—it was going to kill him.

“if you’re gonna fuck these town folk, make sure it ain’t in my house.” he spit, and you just rolled your eyes. you felt like you were in trouble for sneaking out, like a teenager.

“i didn’t fuck anyone. we didn’t do anything. he wanted to, i didn’t.” you defended, feeling small now but still holding yourself tall.

joel just looked at you, not wondering if you were lying or not. he knew you weren’t, he heard it himself the minute he heard something bang against your wall. it was just you shuffling to get up, and he heard you consoling him. you weren’t satisfied.

“why’d you lie to me? bout’ seein’ him tonight?” he asked, your head tilted up to his as he steps one step closer. your chest is almost touch his, and your breathing was getting heavier.

“figured you wouldn’t trust him,” you said, sounding like you wanted to say something else but keeping it to yourself.

he was watching you like you were his prey. like you were something he wanted to take and devour for himself, like you were something for his eyes only.

“smart girl,”

“he touch you wrong?” he couldn’t help but ask, the curiosity killing him slowly as time passes with you standing in front of him with your tight pink panties on. he looked down between the two of you and saw the hardened pebbles that were your nipples showing up through your black tight shirt, down to your tummy that was pressed against his. he liked the softness of your belly, he was practically dying to grip it himself. he wanted to grip every part of you, to palm your pussy and feel how warm you were in his grip. he even found himself hating his own mind as thought of what your pussy would look like sucking him in.

“i, he,” you were stuttering, embarrassing yourself as his hand trailed up your arm, thinking of all the ways he could watch you take his cock for him.

you watched him watch you. how his eyes went dark again, how there was a slight touch of possessiveness in his voice. you didn’t assume though.

“can’t find the words, hm? he wasn’t makin’ you feel good?” he asked softly, watching as you closed your eyes and breathed through your mouth, opening again to see a small grin playing on his lips, his head tilted to the side. his fingers barely left your wrist, and made their way to your fleshy hip, tapping against the bare skin. he was enjoying this. making you squirm. making you nervous.

“fuck off, joel,” you meant it to come out a lot stronger than it did, even you thought you sounded needy. “s’ none of your damn business,” you spit, stronger this time.

and before you could even wallow in your retorts, a smile tugged very faintly at his lips. you weren’t so convincing when you were practically trying to pull him to your body with your fists buried in his sweater. he appreciated the effort though, he's never met someone with as much bite in their bark as you.

he just liked to watch you writhe for him. you wanted to whine with how eager you were for him, how mean he was being to you for no reason. you needed him.

“it’s like you’re not even tryin’, what’s the matter? do i make you nervous sweetheart?” he gleamed in his power over you, the way your eyes searched for him and your mouth parted, just for him. he wanted to ruin you in every way. ruin every man for you, show you how to truly be taken care of.

"go fuck yourself," you retorted and he actually laughed. and he laughed at you. a sudden heat rushed to your cheeks, embarrassment filling you.

“i didn’t tell you but,” he paused as he leaned into your ear, grazing his cheek against yours and smiling to himself, “you looked real pretty today, ya know that? you look even prettier like this, all flustered for me.”

you had to be dreaming. had to have gone to sleep after tyler left, and this was your wet dream making up for it. there was no way you were this exposed to joel and he was practically pressed up against your body as he told you how pretty you looked. you couldn’t speak, your tongue was tied and joel smiled to himself as he realized he got you to shut up.

“would ya let me touch you, sweet girl? maybe you'd be nicer if someone knew how to touch you,” he asked, his fingers playing on your hip.

you still couldn’t answer. it felt like a trap, like if you let yourself give in to his words, every guard you put up was pointless. you were frozen, and suddenly felt insanely vulnerable but his voice was so inviting, so impossible to not fall into.

“touch me where?” you asked, treading lightly. you wanted to hear it, you wanted him to tell you he wanted you as bad as you wanted him. you wanted to prove to yourself that you hadn't lost your mind yet. but you also wanted to stretch whatever this was as long as possible before you find yourself on your knees for him without even asking.

joel felt like he was out of his body. like he was watching you squirm and move under his presence from above. he was so distracted by how hard your nipples were rubbing against him that he didn’t even notice your fists balled into his shirt, trying to take him in closer. maybe it was the alcohol he drank to ignore the jealousy he felt, or maybe it was the fact that tommy came to tell joel about the boy you were seeing. how the two of you were practically on top of each other before he left, how he was touching you in public–he was angry.

nothing was done, nothing more than joel grabbing your almost bare hip and you tugging on his shirt, but it still felt like something that was crossing a line. a line you wanted to cross.

until he got the courage to grab the hand that was buried in his sweater, taking it in his own and touching you with your hand. he was answering your question. his hand ghosted on top of yours as his eyes watched your eyes train on the sight between the two of the bodies, enjoying how soft and pink you look. you were hot and bothered, and he could get used to seeing you like this.

“first place i’d touch you, baby,” he breathes, his lips practically against your cheek now. he was breathing you in, drinking you in, “is right here,”

his hand guided you to cup your mound, angry that it wasn’t his hand touching you. your breath was shaky while you watched him, your eyes flickering from his moving hand to his eyes, and every time he made sure your eyes latched onto his. he wanted you to know how much he was enjoying teasing you like this, he wanted you to remember the way he looked at you while you panted against him.

“but like this, lemme show you ‘xactly how i’d touch you sweetheart,” he was lost, drunken only on you, ignoring the world around him. “don’t think that boy would be enough for a woman like you, ain’t that right?"

he took his own hand as you were still pressed against his front, his lips now teasing the skin of the crook of your neck and starting to pull your panties away from your skin to dip his hand inside. your breathing was uneven and your soft whimpers were getting louder the more he trailed down into your underwear, and he was loving them.

the second he felt the scruff of your unshaved mound, he heard you release a shaky, sexy breath, and he grew harder against your bare abdomen. even feeling the heat of your skin on his clothed cock made him want to get on his knees and worship you.

"needy little fuckin' thing, that desperate for me huh? you gonna let me feel this pretty pussy how i want?"

he was so fucking filthy. so filthy for someone who hasn't even seen you naked, so filthy for someone who didn't even talk to you before this. it was agonizing, you were melting into his harsh words and wanted to listen to him make you feel small like this all night.

"joel, i swear," you warned as his breath hit your lips with his eyes on yours.

you had a bush, he thought to himself. he really didn’t think that would turn him on of course, but now he pictured you standing in front of him, bottomless. how your belly would look with your curves, the way your breasts would rest at their natural position, your thighs fat and wide all for him, and the pretty fat mound waiting for him to feel and taste. worst time to think all of that of course, because it sent a flood of blood and excitement to his groin, giving him another thing to be nervous about. but god did he want to see it, see all of you laid in his bed, and tugging on the thatch of hair on your mound. he was fucked.

and god forbid you figured out that he’s been picturing you bent and folded in every way just so he could reach to the back of your cervix, if you figured out that his anger towards you is pent up sexual frustration because every time you’re in the shower, he’s thinking of the way you looked lathered in soap, waiting for him to join you. he was a sick man to think of you like this, but all of his desires and fantasies were threatening to barge in, to unleash all of his wants and needs to you.

he was fighting himself to be a respectable man, a man who doesn’t think of women who were young enough to be his own kid in ways that were sinful. he shouldn’t be wanting to fill your throat with his cock when you smart mouth him. he was losing whoever he thought was himself, and letting heart and cock do his thinking.

you couldn't think right, nothing was processing as you felt the heat of his hand on your cunt. you felt another wave of pleasure hit you and suddenly, you could feel your wetness pooling for him in your panties. you had a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that joel actually wanted you too, even if he wanted to put you in your place for once and shut you up.

you didn't care how he wanted you. you were a bitch, but you were desperate for him.

"mmm, you're real scary, baby, threats ain't gettin' you anywhere. you have t' beg me for my fingers," he teased, rubbing the hair on your mound.

"oh fuck off, i'm not begging you for shit," you're putting up a fight with yourself, and you were winning. at leadt you thought so. even if you were letting him touch you this way, you weren't goping to beg him or give him the pleasure of watching you submit to him.

"yeah? maybe i'll jus' make ya," he grinned, his sinister smile forming while he rested his forehead on yours, his hand inside your panties as the two of you watched him tease your lips.

the second joel’s finger moves from your hairy mound to the fat lips of your cunt to spread and feel just how much you ached for him, to tease your hole so you'd be sent into a fit of desperation, the two of you heard the doorknob jiggle and a loud laugh from the outside, meaning it was ellie. joel pulled his hand and body away quickly and nodded upstairs with a hard look, giving you the hint to go before ellie saw you in your panties.

your face expressed everything to him, you needed him. and you didn’t want to let go. he watched as you walked up the stairs, your ass practically eating up the fabric of your panties. it left nothing to the imagination and he groaned, something you swore you heard, before he fixed himself in his pants.

ellie walked in, and you stayed at the top of the stairs out of sight to hear the lecturing.

“are you outta your damn mind, ellie? it’s three in the mornin’,” his paternal instincts were coming out, and you smiled.

“i was down the street. relax, i just didn’t want to stay there.” ellie defended as she slipped her shoes off.

“did somethin’ happen? are you hurt?” he asked quickly, examining ellie to see if he saw blood or cuts anywhere.

“jeez, no joel lay off. why are you up anyways isn’t it like six hours past your bedtime?” she scoffed, annoyed at the father figure lecturing her right now. what was he gonna tell her?

“was waitin for your friend to come home, so i can lock up before bed,” he lied. he was lying and you knew it. you came home an hour ago, and he was still up.

“you’re in love aren’t ya? old man,” ellie teased. her demeanor was a little more playful than she’d been this last month and he shook his head annoyed, but to you it was silent. your lips pinched into a thin line as you heard joel grunt.

“go to be ellie. now.” he ordered and she rolled her eyes, saying her good nights and going to the garage to sleep in her space.

a part of you wanted joel to come upstairs, into your room and to do everything he wanted to do. you didn’t know exactly what he wanted to do, but with the touching and flirting he was doing, it seemed like he wanted you. maybe he was drunk, you could smell it on his breath! he seemed pretty sober talking to ellie. you cursed yourself as you moved quietly to your room, leaving the door cracked open just in case.

but nothing. you heard him trudge up the stairs, and walk directly the opposite direction into his own room. you were frustrated at this point. sexually frustrated if you must say, and the ache in your core was not leaving any time soon.

you felt embarrassed, and you felt like joel was toying with you. all of the sudden this comes up and he's trying to finger fuck you in the living room when you genuinely thought he didn't even acknowledge your mere existence. it was so confusing for you, but the only thing you knew for sure now after a few weeks of deciding is that you craved joel miller.

it was a weird feeling. only because growing up in an apocalyptic world as a teenager and a young adult meant your chances of love and relationships were slim to none, at least for you. but you met joel in times where you had given up already.

as you lied in bed, wondering if joel was asleep or thinking about you too, you felt silly. you were setting yourself up for disaster by having hope that whatever this was with joel was more than that, and not just that. you worried you were getting ahead of yourself, maybe you were taking joel's advances too seriously. what if he just wants an easy fuck? nothing serious, something for pleasure in this dark world where everyone seeks a way to alleviate their pain

you felt like maybe you were geting into your head like you always do. maybe this could be good. maybe this could be your chance to let go, be vulnreable again, let someone make you feel like a teenager again. you had your fair share of crushes when you were in the QZ, you remembered that innocent feeling of liking someone, the shyness that came with it, how nervous you got around them. and with joel, you felt that times one hundred.

the flutters in your stomach, the goosebumps on your skin when he stands too close to you. he made you feel good even without trying.

but nothing good comes from joel miller.

185 notes · View notes

enhashoutout · 4 months ago

Text

Meet Me At The APT (Marcus Lopez Arguello x reader)

youtube

Inspired by APT by Rosé and Bruno Mars because the song has been stuck in my head and on repeat since it was released :)

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Cussing, mentions of suggestive content, smoking, drugs, domestic violence between Maria and Chico, derogatory terms, fighting, weapons, mentions of death, typical Deadly Class violence (let me know if I missed anything to update this section)

___ used in place of Y/n

I always write my mc/reader with female pronouns and physical features because that is what is easiest for me but if you do not identify with anything that I write please feel free to change that up to fit you!

If you haven't seen Deadly Class before, the show is based off of a graphic novel set in the 80's. King's Dominion is a secret/private school that trains teenagers in Deadly Arts. These kids are basically trained to become a new generation of assassins. Some of these kids come from big crime backgrounds like Yakuza, Cartel, Dixie Mob, etc. Some of these kids just had bad pasts and find themselves at King's Dominion such as Billy who is forced to attend King's by a gang that his dad owes money, or Marcus who tried to expose the owner of the boy's home he used to live in but the plan backfired so now he's labeled as a psychotic child-mud3r3r but he isn't.

Legacy refers to the students at King's Dominion who are a part of a power and established group already such as being a kid who is from the Yakuza or Cartel. (Maria, Chico, Saya, Brandy)

Rat refers to students at King's Dominion who don't have powerful affiliates. (Petra, Billie, Marcus, Lex)

𝔻𝕠𝕟'𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕞𝕖, 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕀 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 ��𝕒𝕓𝕪? 𝔻𝕠𝕟'𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕟𝕖𝕖𝕕 𝕞𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕀 𝕟𝕖𝕖𝕕 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕟𝕠𝕨?

The one where reader has a crush on Marcus, the new student at King's Dominion and is being very open but also very secret about it.

It was another day at King's Dominion. Petra and ___ were putting their books into their lockers before class started. Billy rode his skateboard through the halls, a soda in his hand, stopping next to the two girls.

"I am so tired." (Billy)

"Why?" (Petra)

"I spent all night chasing a new student. It was an assignment from Lin." (Billy)

"Did you bring them in?"

"Nope. Saya did." (Billy)

"Go figures. Says is the top student at King's."

"You're not far behind her ___." (Petra)

"In grades not at all, you're best out of Rats and just second right behind Saya. Status on the other hand..." said Billy in a teasing way. ___ and Petra both smacked his arms.

"Owww." (Billy)

"Very nice Billy." (Petra)

"It was a compliment! You are the second in student ranking in terms of grades ___. That's why you're the only Rat that's part of AP Black Arts." (Billy)

"That's good enough for me. I don't think Rats make valedictorian anyways. So who is this new student you were chasing down?"

"Marcus Lopez Arguello. Psycho. Apparently he killed all the other boys he lived with in his old boy's home and then burned the place down. He'll be joining Rats. Hey you'll finally have a friend in AP Black Arts now! Marcus is enrolled into it also."

"Ohh okay," said Petra and ___ as they listened to Billy.

"He's that one right over there," said Billy as he pointed to a boy with curly hair standing by his locker and trying to open it. The trio watched Marcus open his locker and pull out a little plush with a knife stuck into it with a note reading "child murderer" taped to it, he angrily threw it back into the locker with his books. They watched Maria walk up to him, flirting with him.

"How much you guys want to bet that if Maria is here, Chico isn't far behind her?"

"Not betting you anything because I know you're right," said Petra.

Before ___ or Billy could respond, they heard the sound of someone being shoved up against the lockers. The 3 turned around and sure enough, Chico had Maria pinned up against the lockers, his hand around her throat and threatening her and Marcus. Marcus tried to intervene causing a scene with one of the school monks stepping in see what was happening.

"That's our cue to get to class," said Petra. The other two agreeing as they all began walking to their respective classes, unfortunately having to walk past Marcus, and the other Soto Vatos to get to class. As they walked by, Chico grabbed Billy's drink and poured it over Marcus.

"I was still drinking that!" exclaimed Billy.

"Don't care," said Chico as he grabbed Maria and left for class, the other Soto Vatos following behind them.

"I'll buy you another soda Billy," said ___ as she put her arm around him to get going. "Hey, hurry and clean up and change your shirt. There are usually spare white shirts in the closet right by the restrooms. Master Lin doesn't like it when kids are late to his class," ___ said to Marcus before her, Petra, and Billy went to class.

"Thanks," said Marcus.

ᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚ

Petra and Billy split off to go to their class while ___ entered AP Dark Arts, sitting in her seat. The seat next to her was often left empty because the Legacy kids preferred to sit together.

Marcus entered the classroom, noticing that only two chairs remained empty. He chose what he thought would be the better option, walking up to ___ and tapping her on the shoulder. "Hey, can I sit here?"

"Hey, you made it to class on time. Yeah, go ahead."

"Thank you," said Marcus as he slid into the seat next to her.

"Don't mention it."

"Awww the little rats are sitting together," said one of the Dixie Mob girls sitting next to Brandy.

"Leave us alone Dixie Mob," said ___.

"Or what rat?"

___ reached into her blazer jacket, pulling out her butterfly knife and throwing it at the Dixie Mob girl, the knife landing in the wall and a chunk of her hair falling to the floor. The Dixie Mob girl let out a loud gasp, looking at ___ in disbelief.

"This time it was your extension. Next time it'll be all of your real hair Dixie Mob."

Master Lin walked into the room before the conversation could continue, pulling ___'s butterfly knife out of the wall and walking up to her desk. "Miss ___, it is too early to be throwing your knife around. I don't want to see it again you hear me?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Let's start our lesson," said Master Lin as he walked back up to the front of the classroom. "World war I was started by a teenager with a pistol, a Serbian peasant who chose to assassinate Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Set in motion the chain reaction culminating in two world wars and today's Cold war. Character is revealed through choice. Consider for a moment-"

Brandy slid a note onto Marcus's desk, Master Lin's cane coming down on the note.

"Sorry, I was just-" began Marcus. Master Lin's cane flew into Brandy's face, making her nose bleed. "Jesus!" said Marcus.

Everyone in the room let out laughs at Marcus's reaction.

"Who would be the recipient of your rage; A thief, a child molester, a world leader? This one decision betrays all secrets and unveils true motive. Ask yourself. On that dark ledge, poised to strike with clean opportunity. Who would you kill?" The school bell rang, dismissing the students to their next class. "Your homework tonight, half your semester grade, will tell me who you really are. Use your training. Search the city for a worthy target. Someone you think deserves to die, and kill them. Discard the body, hide all evidence. Bring me proof," said Master Lin as students began filing out of the room.

"No problem for a killer like you," said one of the boys sitting behind the two.

"Shut up and get your next class," said ___ with a sneer.

"Um, is everyone like that?" (Marcus)

"Yeah. People here tend to not be friendly, don't think too much of it. Everyone who is a Legacy has a stick up their ass because of family relations and a good amount of the Rats drown in self-pity and depression, it's nothing personal."

"You're nice though."

"That's because I think the hierarchy shit is dumb. We're all getting trained to be the next generation of shitty people who disrupt regular civilians' lives. Some of us are gonna be rivals but a good amount of us are gonna be allies once we graduate, might as well start good relationships early right? And technically I don't care what anyone actually does unless we're friends and I stay out of everyone's business unless I have to step in. What class do you have next?"

"Martial Arts with Miss De Luca."

"Same, let's go together. Hurry she doesn't like tardy students either and we have to change," said ___ as they walked to the Martial Arts gym room.

"You said that you only step into things when you have to right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"So why didn't you step in to help Maria this morning?"

"I don't step in for Maria anymore. I did when we were younger, got a gnarly scar on my arm, my torso, and a few on my back from Chico for challenging him though. Maria knows that Chico is a possessive asshole and continues to flirt and sleep with other guys in school. She knows he'll actually harm people because Chico could not care less who lives or dies and she does it anyways so that's on her. I'm not stepping in for someone who continuously makes the same dumb mistakes and gets caught making the same one over and over again. We also aren't friends so... Go get changed and get to the gym. Don't challenge Miss De Luca, she likes to make a student's humiliation to teach the others."

Before Marcus could answer, ___ was off to change.

The class sat kneeling on their knees as they listened to Miss De Luca. "The world respects those who can protect themselves. Every opponent has a weakness. Pick a partner. Find theirs."

Marcus got up, ready to head over to ___ but was stopped by Maria so he paired up with her. ___ paired up with Petra. The two fought and ___ was able to pin Petra down to the mat.

"What's my weakness ___?"

"The fact that you don't actually put up a fight in this class so I could put in no effort and still pin you down. What's mine?"

"The fact that you are scared to put hands on people who are your friends. I know you're stronger than that but you didn't use all your strength because your opponent is me. You should try fighting Viktor next time, I think your results will be better."

"Oh shut up Petra." The two girls laughed when Petra tapped ___'s leg and nodded behind her. ___ helped Petra up and looked behind her to see Marcus and Maria looking at her. Maria said something to Marcus before they went back to fighting.

ᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚ

Lunch time came around eventually. Petra and ___ sat on the rooftop together waiting for Lex or Billy to eventually show up, the two were laughing at Viktor's misfortune in Poison class.

"Yeah. Billy snuck some into his drink and then his insides were gone to shit." (Petra)

"I wish I had Poisons with you guys to see that happen what the heck."

"What you ladies up to?" said Lex as he entered through the door.

"Nothing," both girls answered him. Lex and Petra engaged in a conversation about explosives while ___ looked out at the San Francisco skyline. Billy and Marcus came through the door, Billy explaining your hang out spot to Marcus.

"Petra, Lex, ___, meet Marcus, the new Rat. Well, I think ___ already knows Marcus but still." (Billy)

"Yeah we had AP Black Arts together and we all had Martial Arts together remember?"

The four of you continued to talk when Marcus made it known that the person he wanted to kill most was the President. The other 3 laughed, deeming the task to be undo-able. Marcus stood next to you by the railing.

"I don't think it's dumb or un-doable."

"What?" (Marcus)

"The person you want to kill. I don't think it's un-doable. I think if you strategize correctly, you could assassinate anyone. I don't know your full story but I'm sure whatever you did at the boy's home was carefully thought out and executed, that's why Lin was looking to recruit you in the first place."

"Thanks... We didn't get to finish our conversation earlier." (Marcus)

"I told you to change for Miss De Luca's class, I don't think that conversation warrants a continuation."

"No. You said that you don't step in for Maria anymore." (Marcus)

"Yeah... what about it?"

"Why not?" (Marcus)

"I remember telling you that Chico fucked me up for trying to step in earlier. Did you want to see the scars to believe me?" ___ asked as she began untucking her white button up shirt.

"NO! No. I'm good. I believe you. I just don't get why people don't help other people in need you know?"

"Because you're at King's Dominion Marcus. These kids are all trained killers and manipulators. No one here is wired to help other people, only themselves."

"But you are. You've been helping me all day." (Marcus)

"I've been helping you today because it's your first day and I remember my first day at King's being shitty as a Rat. It's gonna take me about 48 more hours to determine whether or not I want to keep helping you or completely ditch you and throw you to the wolves."

"Oh...okay. I'm gonna go talk to Billy," said Marcus as he walked away. Petra walked back to ___, getting back up on the rooftop railing to sit with her for the rest of the duration of lunch. ___ continued to take glances at Marcus, the glances not going unnoticed by Petra.

"I know that look. You're plotting. What are you plotting? And who are you plotting against?" (Petra)

"I'm plotting... for myself. I'm gonna get Marcus to come to the apt."

"The apt?! Your apartment?! Why?!" Petra whisper-yelled.

"Because I want him, and the mob that is forcing me to come to King's Dominion in the first place bought me an apartment nearby for a reason, I might as well make more use of it."

"Doesn't it usually take you like 72 hours to decide if you like someone enough to even be friends with them? So how did you determine that you want to get laid by him within one school day?" (Petra)

"One, because he seems to be different from other people here. Two, I have a feeling Maria is after him too... and I want to get to him first."

"You're gonna challenge Maria?!" Petra whisper-yelled at ___.

"Yeah. Why not? It's about time someone challenge the Legacies don't you think?" ___ asked with a mischievous grin and glint in her eyes.

Petra thought about the idea for a few moments in silence before she sighed and looked at ___, "Okay. I'm in."

"Really?!"

"Yeah. I still stand by the point that we as Rats should stay out of the Legacy students' ways for safety, but I want to see someone finally challenge Maria when it comes to boys so I'm down. What should I do to help?"

"Help me put little notes into Marcus's locker, bag, and then eventually get him to come to the apartment?"

"I got you."

The two girls high-fived and giggled to themselves at the plan that was about to unfold.

ᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚ

Throughout the next two weeks, Marcus began receiving little pink notes in his book bag, his locker, and the notes would even get slipped under his dorm room door once in a while. He was determined to find out who was leaving him little love letters, but was always a step too late to catch whoever was leaving them.

The Rats were sitting on the rooftop during lunch again. Petra and ___ sitting on the rooftop's railing and Marcus, Billie, and Lex sitting in their own spot, huddling over Marcus's love notes trying to figure out who sent them. The kicker here is that Billy knows exactly who these are from. No one else likes pink as much as ___ does within the other Rats, and he recognized her handwriting because he has borrowed notes from her multiple times. Billy had confronted the girls after the first time Marcus showed him one of the notes.

A week ago

Billy was sitting in his dorm doing homework when Marcus burst into his room. "Okay jeez Marcus, don't even knock or anything. I could've been in my underwear!"

"Billy I need help." (Marcus)

"With what?" (Billy)

"These!" said Marcus as he pulled a handful of pink papers out of his book bag to show the other boy. "Someone keeps leaving me love letters and it's driving me insane trying to figure out who is leaving them in my bag and my locker." (Marcus)

Billy took one out of Marcus's hand and looked at it, reading the words neatly written in cursive. "'I'm tryna kiss your lips for real', with little red hearts around it. Awww that's sweet. Someone has a little crush on you Marcus."

"BUT WHO?!" (Marcus)

Billy looked at the boy in disbelief, not knowing how it wasn't obvious who wrote the note. "Are you serious?"

"Do you think I would be here asking you for help if I knew who it was?! Do you know who it is?!" (Marcus)

"No." Billy was lying. He could tell from the handwriting that it was definitely ___ but figured she had a reason behind the notes rather than telling Marcus to his face, so Billy kept quiet. "Do you have any idea who it is?"

"I have an idea of who it isn't from if that counts for anything." (Marcus)

"Let's hear it." (Billy)

"It's not Brandy or anyone from Dixie Mob. It's definitely not Saya. I feel like the pink could mean it's from one of the other Kuroki girls. Those girls like cute pink things right?" (Marcus)

Billy stared at Marcus in disbelief. Marcus was already half way there with the "cute pink things" and was still dumb enough to get the answer wrong. "Absolutely not Marcus. Kuroki doesn't fuck around with Rats."

"Saya talks to me." (Marcus)

"Because you're her pledge Marcus. If she could avoid you all together I'm sure she would. Try again." (Billy)

"Okay so it's not Dixie Mob or any of the Kuroki girls. Is it Maria?" (Marcus)

"I did not think there would ever be a day where someone at King's Dominion out-stupids me and yet here we are." (Billy)

"WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME STUPID?!" (Marcus)

"Because it's obviously not Maria! For one, Maria's color is RED okay? Not pink. And she's been all over you since you got here with no problem even with Chico trying to kill you both so why would she be leaving anonymous notes?! Even if she was the one leaving the notes, she wouldn't have gone this long without exposing herself to you so that you guys could have sex in her dorm room. Think harder."

"You're no help, I'll go ask Willie," said Marcus as he left Billy's dorm room for Willie's.

Billy waiting for Marcus to be far enough to not hear him, and left his dorm room to visit Petra and ___'s dorm. He knocked on the door, being met by ___. "Hi Billy! Whatcha doing here?"

"I got questions for you," he said as he invited himself in and sat on ___'s bed because if he sat on Petra's bed he would get smacked. ___ closed the door and sat next to him while Petra sat on her bed and looked at her other 2 friends.

"So... why are you leaving Marcus little love notes?" (Billy)

Petra and ___'s eyes widened, both attacking Billy to cover his mouth and shushing him. "You can't just say that shit out loud!" Petra whisper-yelled.

"How do you know it's me?!" ___ whisper-yelled at Billy.

Billy lightly smacked their hands on top of his mouth for them to let go. Once the two girls got up off of him and everyone settle back onto ___'s bed he looked at the two in disbelief. "Hello? The pink paper? The little red hearts? The handwriting? No one writes like that except you."

"How would you know that?"

"No one likes pink the way you do and because I borrow notes from you all the time. I think at this rate, I would know your handwriting." (Billy)

"Okay so how come Marcus doesn't know then? He borrows notes from ___." (Petra)

"Because he's dumb," Billy and ___ said at the same time before laughing.

"He is! He thought it was a Kuroki girl or Maria and I realized that he did in fact out-stupid me for not knowing it was you." (Billy)

"You can't tell him yet Billy. Don't tell him at all actually."

"Why?" (Billy)

"Because our plan isn't finished yet. We're gonna get him to ___'s APT." (Petra)

Billy stared at the two girls, jaw dropped to the floor. "The APT?! Your apartment?!" Billy whisper-yelled back at the two.

"Mm-hmm."

"Why?" (Billy)

"Cause I want him."

"Are we forgetting that Maria also wants him? And that we are Rats who probably shouldn't test a Legacy?" asked Billy.

"That's what I said when ___ first told me. But she's determined so I said I would help." (Petra)

"I just think that if I want something then I should have it. Screw Maria, she can have all the other guys who are begging to get into her bed, I want Marcus," said ___ with a nonchalant shrug.

"I'm in. What do I do to help?" said Billy after some contemplating.

"Steer him away from the correct answer until I'm ready to reveal that it's me?"

"Will do. But why exactly are we dragging out the process?" (Billy)

"That way Marcus gets antsy about who is behind the letters and agrees to meet at the APT no questions asked." (Petra)

"It's a full proof plan don't you think?"

"Yes because he's actually going insane trying to figure it out." (Billy)

"That's good."

Back to the present

Petra looked at the group of boys standing over Marcus's pile of pink love letters, trying not to laugh because Lex has no clue, Marcus is clearly stressed trying to figure it out, and Billy is being of no help to the boys in favor of helping the girls.

"How long do you think it'll take if I just kept this going until Marcus figures it out?" whispered ___ to Petra.

"Too damn long that's for sure. If you want him first we gotta stick to the original plan." (Petra)

"I guess you're right... tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?!" (Petra)

"Ssssssshhhhh!" said ___ as she looked over at the boys to see that they weren't paying attention to the two girls and the noise they were making. "Yes, tomorrow. It's a Friday night tomorrow so we won't have classes the next day and Lin won't look for us because it's the weekend. Plus, Marcus has been hanging out with Maria more often and I want him first."

"What makes you think they haven't already-" said Petra as she made an explicit gesture with her hands.

"Because Chico has been on Maria's ass more often. The only times he's not watching her like a guard dog I when she has classes without him in it."

"Oh okay. When should I deliver the last note?" (Petra)

"Slip it into his backpack during Poisons tomorrow. I'll tell Billy the plan later on the way back to the dorms."

"Okay, I will do that." (Petra)

ᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚ

Tomorrow during Poisons, Petra slipped the last little pink note into Marcus's book bag on her way to her seat. Class went on as usual, dealing with everyone else who was insufferable.

Class thankfully did come to an end. Marcus opened his bag to see another pink note, grabbing it and putting it into his pocket and then putting his books back to head to lunch.

Marcus stood on the rooftop waiting for the others, pulling out the note to read. He noticed the note was larger in size compared to the others. It read, "Sleep tomorrow but tonight go crazy, all you gotta do is meet me at the APT" with an address and directions how to get there underneath.

"OH SHIT!" yelled Marcus after reading the note.

"BLOODY HELL WHY ARE YOU YELLING?!" Yelled Lex as he walked through the door, the others following behind him. Billy and Lex joining Marcus to see what was going on, and Petra and ___ going to their usual spot on the railing.

"She wants to meet me tonight." (Marcus)

"Who?" (Lex)

"Mystery love letter girl." (Marcus)

"I thought they were love notes, not really love letters, you know what I mean?" said Billy just to irritate Marcus and Lex a little since he already knew what was happening.

"Who cares what they are?! Just go meet her tonight! Tell us who it is after and if she's hot." (Lex)

The three boys celebrated Marcus somewhat figuring out who this girl is and getting to meet her.

"What did you put on that note?" said Petra as she laughed at the boys' reactions.

"'Sleep tomorrow but tonight go crazy', plus my address and directions."

"Are you guys gonna actually..." (Petra)

"Yes. Only if he wants to though, I'm not that mean."

Petra looked at ___, jokingly judging her.

"Hey, hey, hey. You don't get to judge me, you fucked Viktor at the last party."

"Because I was curious!" (Petra)

"So am I!"

"Tell me how it goes afterwards." (Petra)

"If you want my opinion I think it'll go better than you and Viktor."

"Oh shut up."

The two girls laughed at their conversation, pivoting it to a different topic as to not get caught by the boys.

ᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚᰔᩚ

Marcus did in fact arrive at the APT to find ___ behind the door. And ___ did in fact get to Marcus before Maria did... if you know what I mean.

You made it to the end! This is just a small story I worked on during my lunch break today, nothing too serious or well thought out but I hope you liked it anyways. This piece isn't proof-read so there might be typos and grammar errors etc.

I don't own any of the characters from Deadly Class and take no credit for them. All credits go out to the correct people.

© This work is copyrighted by enhashoutout. I only post my work on this Tumblr account. I do not allow people to repost or translate my work without my permission. If you do see anyone doing so, please let me know. Writers work hard on their stories, please don't be a crappy human and take our work. ♡

#Youtube #marcus lopez arguello #deadly class #marcus lopez imagine #marcus lopez x reader #mattheo riddle #Marcus Lopez Arguello x reader #deadly class syfy #mattheo riddle x reader

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romana-after-dark · 2 years ago

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Dirty Little Secret

Darkish!Joel Miller x Fem!reader

Main account @romanarose

Summary: Joel doesn't acknowledge you exist, outside of when Ellie is away and he fucks you into the mattress before sending you on your way. So, you make him jealous. Finally, Joel decides to lay his claim.

Warnings: PIV sex, riding Joel, slapping, choking, hair pulling, cutting, carving into skin, violence, possessive Joel, jealous behavior, toxic relationship? idk. If i miss anything lmk!!!! general dark content nothing like the wildness in The Wrong Way but still.

I started writing this a few weeks ago, then I saw @toxicanonymity posted something similar in their Raider Joel series. I reached out and asked if they wanted me to wait on posting this since they have similar concepts and they were kind enough to not have any problem with me posting this, but I wanted to plug their raider series anyway. It's incredible and if you like this or my raider Joel series, the wrong way, you'll love this one!!!

***********

Joel Miller was desperate to teach you that you belonged to him, and him alone. He’d carve it into you if he had to.

“Think you can just whore yourself out for a drink huh?” He spoke gruffly, large hand wrapped around your neck.

“Drinks, Joel. I got one for you too, but you’ve yet to say thank y-” You were cut off by him tightening his fist around you, cutting off your airways.

“Yeah, because you stole his that he was intending on drinking with you.” As your vision began to spot, and you wondered if maybe you took things too far, he let go. “Now what the fuck was that about?”

To say you didn’t mean to upset him would be a lie, so you didn’t, but could bare to tell him the truth. The truth that you were tired of sneaking around, tired of him completely ignoring you because he didn’t want to deal with people (Maria and Tommy) telling him you were too fucking young, or having to explain anything to Ellie, although you were near certain she already knew. You just wanted him to fucking acknowledge that you existed outside of fucking you senseless. As you were straddled across his bare lap, his cock speared inside you, and his free hand moved your hips to his liking Joel took his hand off your throat to deliver a crisp slap across your face, stinging with the anger you both felt as he hate-fucked you,

“ANSWER ME!”

“YOU IGNORE ME!” Screaming, you shove him back so that even though he sat up-right, his head hit the wall, but you don’t stop. “You won’t even fucking look at me in town” You grip the touch of grey that pepper his hair, yanking his face towards you as you continue to shout while still spit open on his cock “You avoid me like the plague and I have to sneak into your house in the middle of the night like a common!” Your anger took over, slapping him back although not nearly as hard. “Fucking!” Another slap. “Whore!” Your attempt at a back hand was stopped in its tracks by Joel bruising grip on your wrist.

You were eye-to-eye, faces no more than an inch apart and you felt like he was deciding your fate in that moment. Maybe he’d kill you, but you couldn’t find yourself regretting anything, the slapping nor flirting with the other man… you’d stood your ground, and if this was how you met your end, with Joel’s dick in you, so be it.

His next words, however, surprised you. All the fury was still there and he spoke through gritted teeth, but he spoke nonetheless. “Don’t you ever doubt what you mean to me.”

You pause for a moment, staring him down and determined not to break… but tears welled up in your eyes and your quivers, the intensity and passion in Joel's eyes too much to bear.

“Why are you embarrassed of me?”

Quicker than you thought possible, Joel let go of your wrist and pulled you into a searing kiss, harsh and rough and full of passion. Sucking on your tongue, his hips thrust up into you, fucking you again.

“I’m not embarrassed, never.”

“Then why do you treat me like a dirty little secret?” You cry, forehead to forehead.

“I don’t- I-... I’m a mess. I didn’t want you wrapped up in that.”

“I want it all, Joel. All the mess, all the shit, everything that comes with being with you- ohmygod - I wanna meet Ellie, I want you to introduce me to Tommy as your girlfriend-mmmhhhmmph- I want everyone to know I’m yours.” You began to ride him again, invigorated by your confession. You loved him, you didn’t want to be his dirty little secret anyone.

“Then you’ll have it, sweetness, because you are mine ,” he slapped both asscheeks and squeezed then harshly, painfully. “Fucking mine .”

Joel sloppily made out with your face, missing your mouth half the time; it didn’t matter, he just wanted to devour you. Mouth hung open, you panted in time to his cock hitting inside you, allowing him to taste whenever skin he desired, to lick into your mouth when he focused enough to get there. He moved down your throat, sucking and licking an nibbling as he went.

Breathless, you whine for him. “Mark me, Joel. Please, make sure everyone knows I’m taken.”

Groaning, Joel got to work sucking painful, dark hickies on your neck, breasts, shoulder, obvious and purple and for the world to see, but it wasn’t enough. The more he marked you, the more frustrated and frantic he grew as his cock split you open wide on him. It didn’t matter, because the hickies showed you were taken, but not by who, and what’s worse? They’d fade. He palmed your breasts and with a frustrated growl, Joel clamped down on your shoulder, biting hard. Impaled on him, you scream as he bites, gripping Joel’s shoulders but never stopping rocking on him. Pulling away, he only proceeded to bite again, the blood he was drawing covering his face and he whines, he fucking whines for you.

“It’s not enough” Breathless are his words. “It’s gonna fade, it’s not enough” He bites your arm, desperate and feral for you, for your taste.

“Make it permanent, then.”

Confused, he gazes up at you, red smeared on his face, puppy dog eyes looking for answers, before reaching into the nightstand and pulling out a pocket knife.

A small smile formed on his kiss bruised lips. “Yeah, you want me to mark you up forever?”

Nodding, you beg. “Please Joel, please, carve your name into me!” You cry for him; you need this, you need him… you need to know he wants you to be his forever.

“Yeah, sweet girl? You want my name on you? You sure?”

“More than��anything ” His dick is throbs inside you, and you know neither will last much long at this rate, not with how you two have been hate fucking all night.

The metal was cool on your skin, and you stopped moving so fast, not wanting t mess up with work, but Joel thrust up into you, causing you to scream for him.

“That’s it, princess, scream my name, let everyone know who's wrecking this pussy.” He kissed you, firm and passionate, before the first slit on your thigh stung on you. He wasted no time finishing the J and going on to the O. “Gonna make sure everyone knows your mine, baby, no ones gonna dare look at you with my name on you.” The E was difficult, but the way you were screaming in pain spurred him on.

“JOEL! FUCK ME, JOEL!” You begged for more, warm blood dripping down your thighs and onto the bed.

He obliged, shifting the angle a bit and hitting that delicious spot inside you. Your screams of pain were indistinguishable from the pleasure, coming on his cock, squeezing him tight. Joel scooped up some of the blood and thrust his fingers down your throat and causing you to gag.

"Choke on your blood, baby, just like that, just like how you love to choke on my cock."

You do as you're told, tongue swirling around his fingers, but you take both hands and cover the in the blood dripping down. The, you plant your hands firmly on his chest with a slap, handprints marking him... Your nails pinch into his pecks, dragging them down and drawing blood as he shouted your name loudly. There was no way in hell you were a secret anymore.

“Making… you… mine” Joel grunted with every thrust, slicing both lines of the L as he came inside you, dropping the knife with shaking hands.

You collapse onto Joel, exhausted and in pain and dizzy, but you couldn’t find it in you to regret what the two of you had just done.

“Fuck” You hear him mutter, and you hold him close, burring your face in his neck. “What the fuck did I just do…”

But you hold him tight, not letting his post-nut clarity drag him down. “Thank you”

“For… what?” He was breathless, adrenalin and cumming all taking it out of him.

“Making me yours” You kiss his neck, sucking just enough to leave a small hickey; your own parting gift.

You can year him hum, lifting you off him and onto the bed before getting up. When he returned, he man handled you onto your none-wounded side, and began taking care of the wound. It was a while before it stopped bleeding, but Joel cleaned it, and bandaged it up with gauze.

“Do you regret it?” He asked you, but his voice sounded like he knew the answer.

“No, do you?” Your eyes drooped, but you tried to stay awake. He’d kick you out of his bed and out of his house in a little while. He always did.

“Not a single bit. ”

You saw a smile, content smile on his face and he slide into bed, and you moved to get up on your own accord he grabbed your wrist.

“Stay”

That was not what he expected. “What about Ellie?”

Joel pulls you to him, his hand resting on your thigh that bore his name. “She’s gone tonight with a friend, but if she’s back in the morning… well, she’s 16, I think she can handle me having a lady over… just maybe don’t go to the bathroom or downstairs without me. She won’t hesitate to shoot.” Joel smiles fondly and chuckles talking about his daughter.

Looking at Joel now… he was so far removed from the man who was choking you early, the man you slapped… He was opening up his world to you, allowing you in. “I’d love to stay, Joel. If that’s what you want…”

“It is” He quickly assured, before kissing your nose. “It is, sweetness. I want you with me… forever. We can figure out the rest tomorrow, meet Ellie, meet Tommy, his kid...”

“I’ll be with you forever Joel, just like your name is always with me. Forever.”

He held you close and tight, but careful with your wound. “Forever. I am yours and you are mine, forever.”

You were no longer Joel's whore, his dirty little secret... your own little secret on your thigh was proof enough of who you belonged too.

*****************

Thank you all so much for reading!!!!!! I love you all so much!!!!

I hope you all enjoy <3

@howaboutcastiel @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction

#dark!joel #the last of us hbo #dark joel miller #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #dub con #fem!reader #fem reader #joel miller reader #joel miller reader insert #joel miller fanfiction #joel the last of us #tlou hbo #tlou smut #dark tlou #smut #pedro pascal smut

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pixeldistractions · 3 months ago

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upcoming stories and plans and stuff

Hello, friends, who wants a long texty progress report?!?

Nobody? Well, you’re getting one anyway! 🤪

First, Thanksgiving is about to plow through everybody’s motivation for a week or two, right? Happy Turkey day to all who celebrate! 🦃 Then Christmas and New Year will be right behind it. 🎄☃️🎄 Let’s not set the bar too high, right?

In my noveling life, I have made exactly 800 words of progress on Miserable Ghost Story last month because my brain is stuck on Boxes and Squares instead. (B&S stories got about 12,000 words added, for a comparison.) Oops. I keep going back and forth on what to focus on first. MGS is a good little book, and if I could focus, it would be quick to finish and get out the door, but I’m just so damn obsessed with my B&S characters. My stupid brain writes what it wants to write about. 😖

And mostly, in writing, I feel like it’s a good idea to go where the energy wants to go. When a story is calling, it’s a lot easier to work on something that is calling than trying to force something that is not calling.

But I think also why I’m so obsessed with the story and getting through book 5 is because I feel like it’ll free up my brain a little to work on other things, both in sim stories and otherwise. There’s this mid-story climax point we’ve been building toward and we’re almost there!

So, plow ahead forward? Right? Right???

But wait…

Now I’m kind of picking at some things from book 1 that never got to be part of the blog version, and I want them to be. Some things that were part of old gameplay stories that I want to revise and expand.

Don’t redo old stories… don’t redo old stories… don’t redo old stories!!!

Except I kind of want to go back and redo old stories. 😂🤣😂🤣😵

I guess I’m a bit of a completionist. I know the blog version is not going to include everything from the novels—it could never—but it should include the important things. The things that develop characters and explain motives and maybe just a little bit of the absolutely precious fluff that deserves to be illustrated with sims, just because.

And I do intend to leave the blog version up when the novel version is published (because I’m an indie author and I do what I want!), so I want them both to be as full as they can be for their format.

Because, at the end of the day, this sims story version is here to please me, and please you guys, and it serves no other purpose than that, really. So, it would make me happy to go back and redo some of those earlier pre-story sections, like before even My Sweetheart. So I think I will.

Because I really do want to get back to Colette in #5.3 and she really does need to get laid! But funny enough, after her shock in #5.2 pt 10, then drafting Colette in #5.3, I felt like she was wanting to dig so much into her history of that time and the failure of that relationship. So I’ve been spending a lot of time in that era anyway.

So, a quick flashback story first??? (I said quick, but I didn’t say little. It’s not really very little. But with the writing done and grabbing a few select pictures, I think I can post it quick.)

The flashback story begins almost one year ago in story time, on Maria’s birthday. It’s an expansion/retelling of this gameplay post, which was their first real story on the blog (not as supporting characters), with Maria and Jordan in their flirty coworkers era, and Jordan and Colette in the last months of their quickly deteriorating togetherness. Then it also fills in the gaps in and around “my sweetheart #2” and what drove Jordan to decide to ultimately blow up his life.

As it stands, it’s about 10,000 words (I’m so so sorry! I promise they’re good ones? 😬😬😬) and will be split into 3 chapters of 4-6 parts each.

Some characters are super excited to be back in this era:

Look at her absolutely cheesing at this man! 😆

Girl, stop and get back to work! You’re not even getting a kiss out of him for another 8 months!

Others are not so happy to be back in this time of their life:

He’s like, “Why, oh god why are you doing this to meeeeee?!?!?”

So, coming soon. Unfortunately, I need to build something for the first part, but this is a real historical save point, so all their other houses and locations are ready to be filmed in.

#non sims #and sims #on writing #this is why i've got nothing #jordan #maria #colette

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und8e2ff · 2 months ago

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TL;DR - The Biolizard didn't mean to destroy the Earth. It only wanted to return home.

Biolizard has the mind of a beast, right? Not near as sentient as Sonic or Shadow. At least that's what we're told. I understand any living creature, regardless of sentience, can learn to be hostile towards anything it associates with pain. But... why would the Biolizard associate the Earth with pain? Biolizard is FROM the earth and that's the last place it was before it was subject to inhumane experiments.

I don't see something as bestial as the Biolizard piecing the logic together: "These people hurting me are from the Earth. And therefore I hate them and the Earth." Again, the Biolizard itself is from Earth and wasn't tortured until it was taken away. Just like how a dog doesn't know what country it's in but can still tell when they're in a different place, Biolizard would know it's in a different environment but wouldn't have the reasoning to figure anyone the on arc is also from Earth. Biolizard wasn't exposed to any of the scientists until it was on the Ark. It just wouldn't have the spatial reasoning to put that together.

All that being said, I think it makes more sense that the Biolizard simply wanted to go back home.

Again, it wouldn't have the spatial reasoning to figure the people experimenting on him from the Ark must also be from the Earth if the Biolizard is as simple-minded as we're told that it is. As far as it would be concerned, the Ark and the scientists were always there. And again, the last time it was on Earth, Biolizard's natural-born home, was the last time it was free from pain, exploitation, and imprisonment. Literally why would it hate the earth?

And in its state - consumed with unimaginable levels of pain and lashing out on everything and anything based on pure instinct to survive/protect itself from further harm - would it really be able to reason, "The way in which I'm trying to return to my home, the last place I've known peace, is going to destroy it"?

Kind of Rambling Beyond This Point

We have no way of knowing how sentient the Biolizard was or wasn't.

In real life, salamanders of all kinds do not have vocal cords. Regardless of what it was or wasn't aware of, it couldn't communicate with anyone anyway.

Given that the Biolizard wouldn't have vocal cords to make sounds, how does it roar? Take a very deep breath and exhale as hard as you can with your mouth wide open. And then use sci-fi logic and try to reason out the acoustics of its windpipe or smth, idk. The point is, the Biolizard wouldn't be capable of speech.

Some people think that the fact that it could use Chaos Control suggests that it might be more aware than most of the fandom seems to give it credit for. I'm not sure where I sit on this, but I'm not opposed to the idea. But even with that in mind, there's still no logical reason it would hate the earth.

It makes sense for Shadow to hate the Earth. Shadow's never been to the Earth before GUN raided the Ark. His only connection is that he cherishes it because Maria does. The Ark is Shadow's test tube born home. From his perspective, people came from the Earth to destroy the Ark and all his loved ones on it. HE has a reason to hate the Earth, the Biolizard doesn't.

The only way it would make sense to me that the Biolizard hated/wanted to destroy the earth is if the Biolizard was a "lab lizard"(?) similar to the concept of lab rats. If Biolizard started off as a lab lizard and has only known human exploitation all its life before and after the Ark, then maybe it could be trying to kill two birds with one stone. "I destroy the Ark and the Earth at the same time by making them collide and I finally get the death I've been denied over 50 years in the process."

We don't know where bb!Bio was sourced from. Science facilities generally want to deal with animals that are accustomed to captivity with a predictable baseline, so the last paragraph is kind of plausible.

But here's the thing, we don't know whether that's the case. It's only speculation.

#biolizard #shadow the hedgehog #sonic fandom #sonic the hedgehog

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dangermousie · 5 months ago

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And, the end! I love that in the final sequence(s), it's the first time in the entire drama we see spring. Because the characters have escaped the dreary cold long winter of their lives, and can start on growth and happiness and life.

And I love the theme of the bell (like before she's at the cafe, we see him ride by on a bike and the bell jingles on his wrist) and the bell here again - the start of their reunion.

I love how blurry everything looks because it reflects her vision - she got it back but it's not perfect, she doesn't see that well. But she sees enough. But also, this convo where he mentions he loved a woman who was blind, she says it must have been uncomfortable to love a blind person and his response.

This cracks me up SO MUCHHHHH (because he still doesn't know if she can see at all.)

You got your priorities right, girl!

And then we get the whole convo about her chemo being done and when she found out where he was and all that and how she heard his bell and thought it was familiar blah blah and why he didn't meet her right away but under all the mundane talk, there is just so much hope. And the way he was so charmingly unsure of himself...

Hehehehehe

It so echoes back their earlier convos about how maybe if he lived right, he could meet her again for a new start, with a clean conscience or that if they met again she wanted to ask him so many things. Their wishes came true.

The way they are just blissfully unburdened and happy and free to be together and to love and aaaaaaa

Spring has finally come for them.

I have seen people complain about the ending in terms of logistics. Like how did the mobster give up on wanting to murder him, how did he survive the stabbing on the roof, what exactly happened in the 6 months etc etc but I think what those questions don't really take into account is two things:

This was made in 2013 but in a lot of ways it's a very old school kdrama even for back then and kdramas used to love endings that didn't really explain how we got to a happy ending, we just did, because what they cared about was not the plot but the emotional mood and they wanted angst with a happy ending and so that's what we'd get. Think something like Lobbyist - how did Harry survive and pop up at the end to live happily ever after with Maria? Who the hell knows, who the hell cares, he did. Dramas still do this when it comes to people falling off cliffs anyway.

Tied to (1) but even more important - this is not a plot driven narrative. Like all of NHK dramas, it is a mood and character piece and any plot is there only as a set up to explore the characters and their dynamics. We need Oh Soo to be wrongly in mob debt so he'd have a reason to go after FL but also be a good guy. It's like Young's tumor - we need it to come back to up the stakes but we don't want her to die nor do we have any interest in medical intricacies, we just care how it affects the relationship. So she never cared about the details of how Oh Soo was gonna resolve the mobster issue in terms of logistics - he needed to be in debt to set up the story, he needed to refuse to take her money to show his love, and he needed to ultimately almost die but survive to complete his suffering and transformation arc. We could have had five-ten more minutes where the cops bust the mob boss right after the rooftop and Oh Soo gets taken to the hospital and survives and then finds a new job as a chef blah blah but it wasn't anything NHK was interested in because it's plot not character. She is interested in exploring loneliness and trauma and love as salvation and limitations of one's body (and I think she is also interested in blindness or threat of it as how it affects your world- Young here and Hyun Bin's character in Worlds Within -because she likes to write about characters in situations of limits of their body and suffering and dealing with it.) She is about characters and emotions, not plot. I can see if it doesn't work for others but as someone who cares about emotional logic not plot logic, it's perfect for me.

#kdrama #that winter the wind blows #song hye kyo #jo in sung

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adaptacy · 1 year ago

Note

If you want requests for Johnny could you maybe do something with him x connie? Maybe he spares her and they like run away togetjer IDK literally anything with them pls

omg okay so i know a lot of people ship them and i love both of them but i have never really given connie the time of day so i am SO sorry if she is out of character but i will try my best!! i hope you enjoy <3

There was a silenced yelp from the orange-haired girl as a palm clasped over her mouth and she was tugged backwards, her back hitting someone's chest. The arm holding her was alarmingly large, and she tried to pry herself free, but she was shushed.

"Quit wigglin'. I ain't gonna hurt'ya, damn it," the attacker grumbled, pressing his palm harder against her face. Yeah right. She didn't believe a single word of that.

She squirmed more, and her head was tilted backwards, where she found one of the family members looking down at her, his eyes narrowed sternly as he shook his head.

"Quiet down if you wanna live. If I wanted you dead, you wouldn't still be breathin'. Just hold on," he directed, and Connie frowned, but she did as he asked. He had a good point; he hadn't had any issue slicing the throats of Leland or Ana, and she supposed he would've done the same with her if he wanted her dead.

Plus, she didn't have much of a choice. His arm was wrapped around her torso, preventing her from doing anything more than squirming. Connie's breath hitched as he pulled her deeper into the shed, her eyes widening as she saw the shadow of another family member through the holes in the wood.

"C'mon pretty darlin'! Come on out for us!" A female giggled, calling out for the last remaining victim. Connie looked up at the dark-haired man holding her, and he looked back down at her, shaking his head again. Well, right now it seemed like her two choices were to either die by the hands of this guy, or die by the hands of the slightly more psychotic woman outside.

She chose this guy.

And yet, when the footsteps receded and she braced herself for impact- A blunt force to her head, a stab in her gut, a knife to her throat... she felt his hands release her, and she stumbled forward, turning back to look at him.

"What the hell?" She whispered, looking the man up and down.

"I ain't lettin' 'em kill you. Made the mistake once, I ain't makin' it again. Follow me, an' be silent. 'Less you want me to kill you." He looked her up and down, and she shook her head. "Didn't think so. Be silent now."

Connie responded with nothing more than a nod, deciding her best shot was to follow now, and ask questions later.

"I still don't understand," she sighed, sitting criss-cross on a neatly arranged motel bed.

"Shouldn't you just be glad yer still kickin'?" Johnny glanced behind him at the redhead before he returned his attention to the window he was spying out of.

"I don't think they're coming," Connie murmured, picking at her fingernails.

"You don't know that."

"It's been two hours..."

"Listen here, missy." Johnny turned around with a scowl, and Connie stared him down, blinking. He wanted to get onto her, but all he could manage was a question that had been brewing in his mind. "How the hell'd you 'n your friends find us, anyways?"

"We found her car. Your house was the closest sign of life, so Leland and Ana went out one night and saw you taking a girl back. When they didn't see her leave the next day, we assumed it was you guys who took Maria," Connie explained. While she was obviously nervous being in the same room as a murderer who had killed her friends the very same day, what choice did she have but to engage with him?

Connie quite liked living, having a beating heart, and breathing. She chose that over angering this guy any day. "You damn idiots didn't have a clue what you were gettin' into, huh?"

Connie shrugged, and shook her head. "I guess not," she sighed, scooting backwards on the bed and bringing her knees to her chest. "It was so stupid of us. We didn't know what to do. We just wanted to save Maria."

"Guess you learned your lesson," Johnny mumbled, and Connie frowned. Then she scoffed, turning to look at Johnny.

"Seriously? Don't you have any remorse?" She raised her voice, losing sight of her goal to stay alive. Between his cocky attitude and her friends being dead, she was on her last straw. "You killed them. All of them. They were innocent!"

"I did what I had to," Johnny huffed, looking almost disgusted with Connie. "You're lucky I let you go."

"You didn't let me go. You're practically holding me hostage. What the hell do you want with me, anyways?" Connie growled.

"Well, I can't let you go. You'll run 'n tattle to the cops."

"Yeah, obviously. You're a murderer." Connie took in a deep breath and set her chin between her knees. "You should've killed me. Now I'm just gonna be stuck in purgatory with a cannibal."

"Listen, Darlin'-"

"Ew, don't call me that," Connie snapped.

"I am keepin' you safe, in case you didn't notice. I could'a killed ya."

"So why didn't you? Why did I have to be the one you choose to keep around as a pet?"

Johnny sighed, pressing a palm to his face. He tapped his foot, growing impatient with the bratty girl. She had a point, and a reason to be angry, but it was still hell to deal with. It wasn't like he could just tell her that he liked her spirit, that he thought she was cute, that he appreciated her ferocity-- No, this was not the right circumstance for trying to flirt with a girl. Maybe don't kill her friends next time, jackass. "I'm tired'a being the bad guy. Wanted to help someone for once," he lied, not even sounding that sure of himself.

"You didn't save the others. You had a chance to be the good guy. You really fucked that one up," Connie grumbled. "How long do you plan on holding me hostage?"

"I'm not holdin' you hostage."

"So I can leave?"

"No."

"Then I'm a hostage," Connie corrected.

"Quit sayin' that, dammit."

"Oh, I'm sorry, do you want me on my knees thanking you for what a hero you've been to me? What's your name again? Johnny?" Connie frowned, and then cleared her throat. "Oh, thank you, Johnny! Thank you for killing my friends, kidnapping me, and being a sick bastard of a cannibal. You really are my savior."

Johnny sighed, rolling his eyes. She was not the company he was expecting. Not the company he was hoping for. He had gotten himself into this situation, and yet he couldn't bring himself to pity the girl. Not with this attitude of hers. "You make a habit of talkin' back?"

"Only to serial killers."

"Fine. I wanted to save you. You ain't deservin' of the shit that yer friends went through."

"Neither were they!" Connie yelled, her voice cracking. "God damn it," she whined, pulling her knees closer to her chest as she gave away her weakness. Finally, Johnny felt a slight twinge of regret, of sympathy for the girl.

"I'm sorry," Johnny mumbled, stepping towards the girl.

"Saying sorry doesn't bring them back," she whispered, finally breaking as she let out a tense exhale, silently crying into her knees.

"I know. I-" Johnny paused. He had no clue how to reassure or comfort people. He knew how to make them cry, not how to make them stop. He awkwardly shuffled over to the bed, taking a seat on the edge of it. "I could only save one of ya. They would'a got the rest, and you too, if I tried savin' all of 'em."

Connie didn't respond, she just cried, and Johnny rolled his eyes, more so at the frustration of his own incompetence than at the fact that she was crying.

Johnny shuffled closer to her, looking her balled-up frame up and down, trying to figure out what to do. After an awkward moment of silence, he shuffled even closer.

Connie felt arms around her, and she whimpered, giving in to her needs. She leaned against his chest, crying into him, and he, albeit stiffly, hugged her as she did so. "I'm real sorry, darlin'."

Connie still didn't offer any form of a verbal reply, but she did wrap her arms around his stomach as she cried, and Johnny placed his chin on her head. He didn't know what to do, he was simply following what felt natural. And it seemed to be working.

How he was going to make this up to her, he didn't have the slightest clue. But he wanted to try. He really wanted to try.

#johnny slaughter #connie taylor #johnny slaughter x connie taylor #johnny slaughter tcm #connie taylor x johnny slaughter #connie taylor tcm #tcm game #tcm #texas chainsaw massacre #fluff #angst #fluff and angst #adapting to johnny slaughter #adapting to connie taylor

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wisecrackingeric-2 · 2 years ago

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My thoughts on Resident Evil Death Island: spoilers ahead!!!!

I made a spoiler-free post on my page talking about my opinions on Death island, but here’s my spoiler-filled summary and thoughts on the whole movie!!!!!! This isn’t a one-to-one summary/explanation of what happens in the movie, if that’s what you want, you can find it on @highball66 ‘s page!!!!

Spoilers ahead under cut!!!

When people said this was Jills movie and she was THE main character i didint really believe them. But they were RIGHT. She IS THE MOMENT. SHES THE REAL STAR OF THIS MOVIE. She goes off H A R D

Ok first off. THE BEGINNING????????? I went absolutely F E R A L when I saw we were seeing the POV of umbrella soldiers during the initial Racoon City Outbreak oh my GOD IT WAS SO STRESSFUL. The harsh cut from the two dudes talking in the car, fighting back against civilians to having to isolate their friends after they got infected inside of a meat fridge(???) it was SO INTENSE I WAS GOING ABSOLUTELY FERAL. Basically the main villain was an Umbrella solider named Dylan and was working alongside his best friend JJ, and they were sent to Raccoon City to deal with people trying to break out, but it cuts to all their team members hiding in a meat fridge all having been infected while him and his best friend are the only ones who’re ok, and when they asked for backup to figure out what to do with their infected teammates, the comms come back telling them to lock them in a room and kill them all. The main villain is BEGGING his friend not to and all hell breaks loose as his friend kills all of them, because once they turn into zombies they manage to break out of the room and attack him, and Dylan is literally on the ground screaming for his friend not to and for all of it to stop and it’s PAINFULL. HES LITERALLY CURLED UP CRYING BEHIND A TABLE BEGGING HIS FRIEND TO STOP. T H E N his FRIEND (who is TOTALLY HIS GAY LOVER BY THE WAY. THEY WERE D E F I N I T E L Y GAY) gets infected and he’s FORCED TO KILL HIM OH MY GOD IT WAS SO AHANDHDNXHXNX IT WAS SO GENUIENLY TENSE

Also the Villains motivations were actually really decent??????? It wasn’t his intention to kill random innocent people like Glenn Arias, he specifically made T-Virus filled mosquitos he able to be controlled by his command so he could pick out and specify who to kill, and he wanted to kill SPECIFICALLY people in power or in governments or the BSAA/Terrasave etc etc etc, and he even bought up a few REALLY good points, like how they in the end don’t actually help innocent civilians and how it’s just a big money-making venture for them. Of all the RE villains, this guy was actually really compelling and interesting and genuinely intimidating

He has this repeated thing he does throughout the movie where he’ll get his gun, unload the bullets, point it to his head and pull the trigger just to get that feeling cuz he feels so guilty for killing his “””best friend””” (Totally his boyfriend) and it was s o unnerving to watch.

Also, Dr Taylor’s back!!! And there’s this one REALLY genuinely tense scene where he’s being forced to finish making the weird mosquito thingies, and as the villain (his named Dylan) is congratulating him he’s also pointing a gun to his head and it’s set up in such a way that’s so tense my friend next to me was audibly holding her breath in fright chsnxhsnxjns

Anyways,, LEON ON HIS MOTORCYCLE!!!!!! AND HUNNIGAN IS THERE!!! We never see her face but we hear her voice heaps!!!!!!! He chases after Glenn Arias’ daughter Maria but in classic Leon fashion, he is DESTROYED by her choke-slamming him with her thighs and he crashes the bike. Classic silly goose Leon

Also when Claire goes onto the beach to investigate the orcas, the locals are hesitant of her once she tells them she’s from Terrasave which is a reoccurring theme in the movie

There’s this REALLY AWESOME super tense scene that’s probably the only truly scary scene in the movie where Jills investigating a house for survivors after a zombie attack, and a zombie jumpscares her and she smashed it into a table (which is where the scene from the trailer comes from,) and Chris breaks in with us team and tries to tell her off for going in on her own and being reckless

Later on, Chris is talking with Rebecca and he’s like “I’m making Jill do the mission report for this mission cuz she went in recklessly >:((“ and Rebecca was like “oooooh. Punishment :)” and Chris was like “huh??? Whuh?? No!!” Which made me crack up laughing HCNDHDNDISN but then Rebecca tries to explain that she’s probably struggling with what happened when Wesker brainwashed her, and how she was probably taking that anger out on herself. Chris obviously goes to comfort her at the shooting range, and there’s this cute moment where he walks in covering his ears going 🥺 cuz she’s shooting, and he tries to comfort her and tell her about how he was planning for PIERS NIVANS TO TAKE OVER AND HOW HE FEELS GUILTY FOR HIS DEATH WAAAHHHHH and he tries to tell her that in their line of work death is inevitable, and that it’s worth it to keep going, and Jill opens up about how awful it was to be under Weskers control, and that she felt like she wanted nothing more than to kill them all. She opened up about how all she wanted to do was save innocent lives but now after everything she’s seen she just feels numb, which was SUCH an impactful scene for her, and Chris tried to tell her it’s not worth becoming numb because that’s how you loose your humanity, but she ignores him to keep shooting.

Spoilers, her trauma is never really truly resolved by the end of the movie, which is a real shame; but it’s nice to see it being acknowledged at all, and the scene was really sweet (also while Chris watches her wistfully shooting while ignoring him this time he d o e s n t cover his ears??? You’re gonna go deaf old man!!)

Next, Chris, Claire and Jill are all hanging out in Rebecca’s office talking about life and how boring having to beat up bad guys is over coffee and it’s SO CUTE AND DOMESTIC RAGH and then they all go to meet up with Claire and talk about how the T-Virus is infecting people only on Alcatraz and how more cases are spreading blah blah blah plot stuff but next scene they arrive on a boat to Alcatraz DISGUISED AS TOURISTS AND CHRIS HAS THE FULL HAWAIIAN SHIRT GOIN ON ITS SO CUTE AAAAAAA and Jill has this cute lil cardigan on meanwhile Claire didint even bother trying to disguise herself???

There’s this scene where this YouTuber dude is being recorded and he’s being all loud and annoying and it FEELS like an obvious dig at Mr Beast and it was SO FUNNY my friend and I were SHITTING ourself laughing the whole time, and then booyah everyone gets infected from mosquitoes and turns into zombies except for the three main guys, and they CLIMB AROUND THE PRISON LIKE FUCKING MONKEYS????? IT WAS S O SILLY AND FUNNY I WAS LAUGHING SO HARD and as Chris and Claire are mowing down the zombies Jill gets seperated from them and falls into the sewers, where she gets lost and runs into Leon- she thinks he’s a zombie at first so they have this really cool mini fight-scene before they finally meet eye-to-eye and she’s like “:00 Leon??” And he responds “Well whaddya know. It’s Jill Valentine!” And it was SO CUTE WAH and he tells her that he’s been looking for the one and only Doctor Taylor and in his words says “he’s wanted by the US-Of-A” oh my god I love this man so much he’s so goofy and these weird marine lickers come out of the water and they have to stay quiet and there’s this one moment where the lickers tongue slides up Jill’s body and my friend and I were looking at each other like 😀 the whole time HCNSHDNSUD before Leon eventually shoots it and summons more.

Their dynamic is S O GOOD I CANT EXPRESS ENOUGH HOW GREAT THEIR DYNAMIC IS Leon asks if Jill has a gun and she says she lost it, so he does this funky lil gun trip and twirls it before giving it to her and she’s like “thanks :)” and as more Lickers arrive she immediately tells him to DUCK and he just leaps in the opposite y direction, and as they’re running away from them Jill asks;

“How many are there?!”

And Leon responds

“I ain’t stoppin’ to count em’!”

And my friend and I were S H I T T I N G OURSELVES LAUGJING and when they FINALLY manage to blow them up Leon goes

“Zero”

“Huh???”

“You asked how many there were. Zero, now :)” HES SO GOOFY I WANNA MARRY HIM

Their dynamic is SO GOOD

Then, Chris and Claire find Dr Taylor hiding in a little box, who introduces himself with a fake name and is CLEARLY pretending to be a good guy. Claire tells him she’s with Terrasave and his first reaction IS TO CALL HER A TERRORIST AND SAY TERRASAVE WAS BEHIND HARVARDVILLE?????? Claire obviously CHEWS HIM OUT and Chris stops them but goddamn I think homegirl deserved to destroy him. Claire tends to his wounds anyways, and she and Chris tells him they’d help him even if he was one of the bad guys and in that moment my friend turned to me and I’m a really goofy voice said “I am the bad guy” and I shit myself laughing

Then Chris and Claire are bit by the T-Virus mosquitoes, and they’re officially out of service for a good portion of the movie. One of my only VERY VERY FEW negatives abt this movie is that Claire and Chris were thrown away for the better part of the middle half, but it’s ABSOLUTELY made up for by the fact that we get to see Jill kick ass and the fact that we get to see Claire and Chris on seen hanging out together just in general

Jill and Leon are still stuck in the sewers and Leon uses his air bender powers to feel a draft, pushes a brick and reveals a secret passageway oooooOOoOoOoo, but Jill is hesitant to go inside and Leon’s like “Hey don’t worry, it’ll be just like a prison break :)” AND I WAS JUST AGAGSGDHXUSH

As they’re crawling on their hands and knees through the passageway Jill says something sarcastic that made me laugh (I don’t remember what it was grrrr) and Leon does this little half giggle and a smile and just :))) ARGAGAGAGAGAH

Then the two of them find the big main Lab, and Leon’s like “this must be where they’re making the virus” and Jill in THE MOST SARCASTIC VOICE EVER goes “Woah, really? You think??” IT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD and Jill IMMEDIATELY suggests that they simply just. Blow it up. And Leon agrees. God I love them. Then Dylan talks over the speaker teasing them to come rescue their friends like Teehehehe Hohoho :)))) it was so silly

Then. Hooooooooo boy. It was THE ship scene of ALL TIME.

Claire and Chris are in seperate cells and find out their are slowly mutating, Claire quicker than Chris, and Dr Taylor is stuck inside with her. Jill immediately runs to Chris’ bars to hold his hand aaaawwwee and Leon isn’t far behind her, and Dylan reveals his evil secret plan to unleash the Mosquitoes ro specifically kill people he wants to turn into zombies. Dylan infects Leon, but spares Jill from it. Dylan then teases her, talking about how he wants her to experience the same pain he felt during Raccoon City and he SPECIFICALLY teases her need to save innocent people by tRYING TO FORCE HER TO KILL CLAIRE AND SAVE DR TAYLOR and she’s getting flashbacks to when she was brainwashed by Wesker and was gonna kill everyone and UGH IT WAS SO GOOD JILLS TRAUMA IS ACTUALLY TALKED ABOUT but ofc Jill refuses (because they’re lesbian girlfriends and in love actually) so Dylan kills Dr Taylor and Claire’s heartstrings are ALSO played on when he thanks her for showing him mercy, and says that she is actually helping people and that she needs to keep doing what she’s doing ARGH IT WAS SO SWEET WAH. And the whole thing with Jill not killing Claire?????? Gay. Gay gay gay

T H E N Leon and Chris have this LONG HEART-TO-HEART WHILE SITTING BACK TO BACK about how the world is fucked, but Chris reassures Leon that they’re doing the right thing, and Leon says that they can’t save the world by killing it, and it’s SUCH a sweet wholesome call back to Leon’s state in Vendetta and he’s clearly doing a lot better now :))

THEN as Dr Taylor’s dying and Claire is having her own emotional scene, he asks them all how they’re staying so positive, and Leon responds;

“We’ve got Jill :)”

MY FRIEND AND I BOTH AUDIBLY WENT AAAAWWWWEEE THEYVE GOT JILL WHEN WE HEARD IT AGSBXYSNXHDHXH

Dylan then explains how he wants to force the group to experience the same pain of having to kill his best friend (gay lover) in Raccoon City like he did, and he specifically makes snide comments to Claire about how Terrasave just puts a bandage over the metaphorical wound and doesn’t actually help innocent people, how Leon just works for corrupt government officials- and Leon just replies with “Yeah just makin’ a livin’ out of it sarcastically while literally dying LEON YOU'RE SO GOOFY STOP BEING SO UNSERIOUS- and then Dylan goes off at Chris for how he throws his teammates into danger and how so many of them die and he still keeps going which OUCH?????? HELLO??? RIP PIERS AND ETHAN IG

Dylan ACTUALLY HAD GOOD POINTS and was a really compelling villain!!!!!! Like his motivations made sense!!!!!!!!!! His sense of vengeance and feeling that the group were a bunch of hypocrites was understandable and compelling!! Especially with his backstory in RC!!!!!!! IT WAS SO GOOD!!

Dylan also goes specifically teases them about how they’re all Pawns for their respective organisations, and hones in on Leon specifically about how he’s a weapon, and them all being ‘Pawns’ is repeated quite a bit throughout the beginning of the movie and the credits which makes me think that may come into play in the future more???? People have theorised that Leon being treated as a government weapon will come back as a plot point in a future game, but with Dylan making actually decent arguments about their respective organisations and the emphasis on all of them being pawns makes me wonder if it’s intentional and will be a big plot point in a future game or something

Also, Leon tries to ask how he’s connected to Glenn Arias, and Dylan just says he was “good friends with him” and that’s how Maria’s there?????? Ok random plot hole but whatever I’m gonna assume they were also gay lovers. Leon then throws a flash Grenade at Maria so Jill has time to escape and kick ass

Meanwhile, Rebecca gets a call from Hunnigan explaining what’s been going on and Rebecca picks up the vaccine and travels to Alcatraz with a squad, but they ALL somehow get killed by the big marine lickers?????? And Rebecca just,,, somehow survives???????? Again, my only negative with this movie is that AGAIN Rebecca has almost no role. I’m S O glad she was there so the whole gang could be in a movie together but it was like her role was reversed from Vendetta but not in a good way. She just,, randomly shows up to save the day, give them the virus, and do nothing else. Capcom WHY do you butcher my baby so badly WHY

Rebecca arrives with her vaccine and heals everybody in a very cute scene and Leon is immediately gone- like bro just teleports- and Chris, Claire and Rebecca have this little shot that screams “Besties…… attack !!!!!!!”

Then Leon runs into Maria, and it’s THAT SCENE. They have a fight and Maria is dodging around like she’s Albert Wesker or something and she CHOKES LEON WITH HER THIGHS AND LEON RESPONDS BY SHOVING HIS NOSE IN HER PUSSY. EVERYONES SEEN THAT SCENE and when she’s like “You killed my father. Prepare to die” he’s like “yeah well,,,,, your dad was kind of a dick” Leon said absolutely Z E R O serious lines in this movie. I genuinely think that all of his lines in this film had at least ONE quippy little quote it’s so good. Then he kills her by stabbing her with a pole lawl

Jill and Dylan then have a stand off at the main entrance, and Dylan does the callback to that reoccurring thing he’s been doing the whole movie where he points his own gun to his head, but this time he shouts himself and he falls into the water in slo-mo in a shot that’s actually really cool, and then a BIG MARINE LICKER CREATURE JUST COMES UP AND EATS HIM????? IT WAS SO GOOFY MY FRIEND AND I WERE LAIGHING SO HARD and then he turns INTO A GIANT FUCKING BOW.

AND IT LOOKS E X A C T L Y LIKE THAT MY HORSE PRINCE MOBILE GAME AD

He had this human face with these horse hoof hands and everytime there was a closeup of his weirdly human teeth I could help but shit myself laighing it was way too funny

Then the whole group gangs up together, and they have an avengers endgame moment where they all team up to take down the beast in a big group shot. Claire and Rebecca go back fo the lab to stop the mosquitoes from escaping, Leon rams a car into the beast, Jill and Chris run away and Chris says “that is one tough cookie” while handing Jill a giant bazooka to kill it with, and Leon hangs upside down from the ceiling like a monkey for a lil bit before leaping off of his car, then Jill and Claire get seperated cuz they get FLUNG ACROSS THE ROOM AND SOMEHOW SURVIVE and Leon teams up with Chris to make an EXTRA LARGE BAZOOKA THAT NEEDS TWO SETS OF HANDS AND THEYRE STANDING BACK TO BACK WHILE FIRING IT AND AGSGXHSSB SO GAY

Jill then distracts the beast by grabbing a lighter as a VERY obvious reference to Jurassic park and yells “COME HERE UGLY COME CATCH ME” and runs away for it to follow her, again, VERY obvious Jurassic park reference, while Leon drives a car with Chris and his GIANT BAZOOKA on top (that looks SUSPICIOUSLY like the one Carlos uses in re3) and Leon says “definitely going on vacation after this” WHILE YOU CAN J U S T BARELY SEE HIS TINY LIL HEAD OVER THE STEERING WHEEL AGSHDHSHDHXU and then JILL gets a GIANT ELECTRIC ROCKET LAUNCHED, A G A IN JUST LIKE IN RE3 (pleasently suprised by all the re3 and re2 references in this movie!!) and it’s not enough to kill it BUT it does fall into the water, dragging Jill in with it in this REALLY goofy scene where you can see a closeup of its teeth, and the gang shuts the Alcatraz doors on it to finally kill it. Rebecca and Claire even have this cute little high-five moment in the lab :)))

The movie ends with the gang all standing outside Alcatraz, watching as rescue helicopters come in, and Leon says “after this, I definitely hate prison tours” WHICH,, KING STOP BEING SO SILLY CHSNSJDN and Chris and Jill have this one last sweet moment where he says “I’m glad you’re back :)” and gives her a fist bump which made me CRY.

Also, completely forgot to mention, but when Dylan inevitably has to kill JJ, JJ first tries to pry his own gun to kill himself out of Dylan’s hands, but Dylan fights him back refusing to kill him until he fully turns into a zombie and Dylan has to SMASH HIS SKULL OPEN WITH HIS HEAVY MEDICAL BAG. IT IS S O BRUTAL OH MY G O D

My overall thoughts;

AMAZING. INCREDIBLE. BEST RE MOVIE EVER. DEFINITELY LIVED UP TO MY STANDARDS.

I’ve said this already but again, I wish Rebecca had a more active role. It felt exactly like what happened with her in Vendetta, but in reverse where she just randomly showed up to save everybody. She was barely in this movie for all the important bits

Also, again, the Redfield siblings kinda dissapeared during the middle of the movie but so does Leon I guess.

Jill was truly the star of this movie, it felt like it was her moment to shine and it was GREAT. She popped off like crazy and I couldn’t ask for any more

Also, as awesome and really cool as it was to see everyone’s traumas being directly addressed, it never gets resolved; Jill’s kinda does, as her final words to Dylan are “GET OVER IT” (referring to how he projects his issues onto everybody) and she has that neat fist bump with Chris (But I think they’re saving that fully fleshed out trauma exploration for a future game)

Again, Dylan was also really the star of the movie. He’s easily one of the best villains in RE, and his backstory in Raccoon City was SUCH a cool callback and a realistic motivation. All the references to the games was just cool in general. And he was SCARY, too. Like all the stuff with his guns and the threatening??? It was spooky!!!!

I do wish that this movie ended on a cliffanger and we got to see a sequel, though. I would’ve LOVED to see what would’ve happened if the mosquitoes got out and infected the BSAA, Terrasave and the Governemt like Dylan wanted (again, he actually had a good point in hating all those organisations)

Also, speaking of, the whole reoccurring thing of the gang being called ‘Pawns’ was REALLY interesting??? Like Leon was called the governments secret weapon a lot, Claire was often berated for being apart of Terrasave, etc etc, which makes me think that that might be an important plot point in a future game???? Like maybe they all realise their respective originations are also evil somehow and they’ve all been pawns in a big game????? I’m REALLY excited to see if that goes anywhere

Lastly, man, this movie lived up to its expectations with all the cool character interactions. Ranging from domestic to heartfelt to gay to awesome, it was so neat- Jill and Leon had amazing back-and-fourth chemistry that was SO FUNNY, Chris and Claire FINALLY had some screen time together, Jill + Claire and Leon + Chris had their own adorable gay moments, EVERYTHING with Chris and Jill was PERFECT, Rebecca absolutely teasing everybody and anybody in their little gang- chefs kiss. Mwuah. Couldn’t ask for anything better. Capcom PLEASE put all of your characters together like this again this movie was SO GOOD I LOVED seeing them all interact so much

Also, Dylan and JJ were absolutely gay lovers. That is a hill I will unironically die on

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starglaee · 8 months ago

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The Tortured Karate Department - Thoughts

Each song from The Tortured Poets Department applies to Cobra Kai/ Cold Hearted in some aspect.

For context, I am a major swiftie and love Cobra Kai so much that I've written a fanfic with an OC named Zion. If you're interested it's on Wattpad, titled Cold Hearted, and my username there is the same as here.

Anyway, I listen to this album and can't help thinking about Cobra Kai characters while I do.

Here are my thoughts. Feel free to add on if you wish!

Fortnight

Cobra Kai (CK): SamRobby. They were so shortlived and this is especially relevant if we go with the plot of Sam looking at Robby during the prom episode: “Your wife waters flowers. I wanna kill her.”

The Tortured Poets Department

Cobra Kai (CK): Amanda and Daniel because she always keeps it real with him: “This ain’t the Chelsea Hotel. We’re two idiots.”

Cold Hearted (CH): Elion (Eli and Zion) at the end of season 2 based on when he says he’ll be with her forever but this is from his POV: “At dinner you take my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on, and that’s the closest I’ve come to my heart exploding.”

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys:

Cobra Kai (CK): Tory with Kreese (obviously not romantically) as he manipulates her but kind of cares: “I’m queen of sandcastles he destroys.”

Cold Hearted (CH): It’s the same but with Zion: “Once I fix me, he’s gonna miss me.” (Foreshadowing for season 6?)

Down Bad

CK and CH: Robby, because all I can think about is at the beginning of season 4 when he was lifting weights and debating leaving: “Now I’m down bad crying at the gym. Everything comes out teenage petulance.”

So Long, London

CK: I’m trying to make this one fit, but honestly none of the relationships are long-term and unhealthy enough (that I can think of?) in this show to really fit Taylor’s heartbreaking writing for this song. Even finding one for Cold Hearted is difficult.

CH: I feel like this can be Zion mourning the loss of Santa Maria and in part her mom with everything suddenly in her past when she can’t take the abuse anymore. But this song isn’t really about abuse. I’d come at it more from the idea of losing the good parts of a childhood home and her moving on despite what her dad may have wanted for her. Maybe.: “I’m just mad as hell ‘cause I loved this place for so long, London. Had a good run.”

But Daddy I Love Him

CK: Okay, so if I had to choose I’d say this applies to season 1 Samiguel with the whole Daniel hating Miguel by association with Johnny: “Even my daddy just loves him.”

CH: I think it fits Zion and Jess well by illustrating their coming out. I know it’s not necessarily queer song and is written from the lens of a massive superstar sick of everyone weighing in on her life, but it also captures the drama of being in high school and being gay in high school specifically. It also works for Tory and Piper who are girlfriends in CH: “I’ll tell you something right now. I’d rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitchin’ and moanin’.”

Fresh Out the Slammer

CK: I’d say this fits Tory and Robby, but instead of the slow burn with them in the parole office I’d say this applies to Tory’s escape in season 5 episode 10 when she meets up with Robby after finally breaking free from Silver and kisses him: “Camera flashes, welcome bashes, get the matches, toss the ashes off the ledge… I will never lose my baby again.”

CH: Zobby (Robby and Zion), if that wasn’t obvious from reading the later chapters of my season 4: “Now pretty baby I’m running back home to you. Fresh out the slammer I know who my first call will be to.”

Florida!!!

CK and CH: Miguel running away at the beginning of season 5 to Mexico: “I need to forget so take me to Florida. I’ve got some regrets I’ll bury them in Florida.”

Guilty As Sin?

CK: for shits and giggles this one is Silver. Just for the fact that he’s arrested as of season 5’s finale teehee.

CH: Zion because she never cheated!: “Without ever touching his skin how can I be guilty as sin?”

Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

CK and CH: Literally any woman on the show! ANY! But if I had to choose it’d be the main 3 (Tory, Sam, and Zion): “‘cause you lured me and you hurt me and you taught me. You caged me, and then you called me crazy. I am what I am ‘cause you trained me.”

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

CK: Idk the Lawrusso shipper in me thinks this fits for them specifically in early season 4 when they try to work together and fail. Or when Kreese finds Silver and brings out the PTSD again: “Whoa, maybe I can’t.”

loml

CK: I feel like if Johnny knew Taylor’s deep cuts he’d listen to this and think about Alli idk: “We embroidered the memories of the time I was away, stitching, ‘We were just kids, babe.’”

CH: Again it feels like an Elion (Eli and Zion) song but this time from Zion’s POV after he said they’d be together forever: “You shit talked me under the table, talking rings and talking cradles. I wish I could recall how we almost had it all.”

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

CK: Tory saying “I broke up with him because of this dojo, you bitch!” Yep. That’s her.: “Try and come for my job.”

CH: I feel like overall this also applies to Zion taking shit and just training through it: “I cry a lot, but I am so productive. It’s an art.”

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

CK: Tory with Silver after she learns about his involvement with Stingray's assault and the All Valley cheating: “You kicked out the stage lights but you're still performing.”

CH: The same with Zion and Silver but arguably worse: “And in plain sight you hid, but you are what you did, and I’ll forget you but I’ll never forgive.”

The Alchemy

CK: Lawrusso isn’t technically canon (yes it is), but if they were this is a cute song for them. I can’t really explain it, so you either get it or you don’t: “‘cause the sign in your heart says it’s still reserved for me. Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?”

CH: Teehee this is self-indulgent but it’s Zobby (Zion and Robby): “Ditch the clowns get the crown. Baby, I’m the one to beat.”

Clara Bow

CK: From Daniel to Sam to Anthony for the LaRusso legacy: “Them’s the breaks. They don’t come gently.”

CH: From Aisha/ Zion to Zion/Tory to Devon for the Cobra Kai girl’s legacy: “You’ve got edge; she never did. The future’s bright. Dazzling.”

The Black Dog

CK and CH: Robby about Sam while he’s in prison and she’s training at Miyagi-Do without him: “Old habits die screaming.”

imgonnagetyouback

CK: Okay, I’ll be cute again. Lawrusso. Do they fight? Do they kiss? How about both?: “Whether I’m gonna flip you off or pull you into the closet, I haven’t decided yet.”

Elion (self-indulgent) in season 3 with the on-and-off flirting and hating: “And I’ll tell you one thing, honey, I could take the upper hand and touch your body, flip the script and leave you like a dumb house party. Or I might just love you til the end.”

The Albatross

CK: It’s about the Miyagi-Do legacy Daniel passes to Sam and Robby OR Johnny explaining how to handle the trauma of Cobra Kai to the young Cobras: ”You were sleeping soundly when they dragged you from your bed, and I tried to warn you about them.”

CH: It can also be from Daniel to Zion about redemption and forgiveness after breaking free from Silver’s Cobra Kai and coming to Miyagi-Do: “I’ll tell you how I’ve been there, too, and that none of it matters.”

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

CK: Oddly enough I think pre-CK Shannon would find this song drunk and think about Johnny. She’d always wonder if he could have been there for her and loved her like he is now with Carmen. Maybe that’s a stretch: “Will I always wonder?”

CH: I feel like Robby for the brief part of season 5 when he leaves Zion he’d relate to this song: “You needed me but you needed drugs more. And I couldn’t watch it happen.”

How Did It End?

CK: Sam because her relationships are everywhere and each breakup - Kyler, Miguel, and Robby - is such a massive thing in high school: “It’s happening again.”

CH: This also applies to Zion because there are so many rumors about her. I’d say in the beginning/ early parts of season 3 is when this is most applicable: “‘Didn’t you hear they called it all off?’ One gasp and then, ‘How did it end?’”

So High School:

CK: I believe Carmen feels So High School with Johnny, despite me not being a Jarmen shipper. I just think about that little dream she had and want the best for her. Just like this song is the best: "You knew what you wanted and boy, you got her."

thanK you aIMee

CH: Zion about Gabi, her former enemy who outed her in Santa Maria: “'Cause all that time you were throwing punches it was all for nothing.”

I Look In People’s Windows:

CK: I think about season one Miguel going over to the LaRusso's house and seeing Robby eating dinner with them when I hear this song. He jumped to conclusions and got drunk angrily without communicating to Sam, too: "So I look in people's windows like I'm some deranged weirdo. I attend Christmas parties from outside. I look in people's windows in case you're at their table."

The Prophecy

CK and CH: What if I just say everyone at one point has related to this song? I'd be absolutely right.

Cassandra

CK: Tory because she is cursed with knowing Silver cheated without being able to do anything about it, she warns Daniel and he gets hurt, and then Kreese abandons her while she struggles to even stay at the dojo: “So they killed Cassandra first ‘cause she feared the worst and tried to tell the town.”

Peter

CK: Kumiko with Daniel for obvious reasons. I do love them.: “You said you were gonna grow up then you were gonna come find me.”

The Bolter

CH: Zion because she keeps running away when things are scary as a trauma response - for example with Miguel’s fall and Silver’s attack: “Ended with the slam of a door then he’ll call her a whore, wish he wouldn’t be sore, but as she was leaving it felt like breathing.”

Robin

CK: This songs reminds me of that one scene that shows a flashback of Daniel training Sam in Miyagi-Do when she was young: "Way to go, Tiger. Higher and higher. Wilder and lighter. For you."

CH: Zion to Ella in season 3 as she teaches her and tries to protect her from the world: “You’ll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline.”

The Manuscript

CK: It doesn't apply because these characters don't move on from or properly cope with anything lmao

CH: For adult Zion looking back on the trauma: “But the story isn’t mine anymore.”

Please add to this or share your opinions. I'd really like to see them.

#cobra kai #taylor swift #the tortured poets department #the tortured poets department the anthology #ttpd #cobra kai fanfiction #daniel larusso #johnny lawrence #the karate kid #miguel diaz #robby keene #eli moskowitz #tory nichols #sam larusso

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