#anyways. 3 more hours until it’s socially acceptable for me to be ‘awake’
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https-furina · 1 year ago
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what if i just bippity boppity boo !
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raggaraddy · 3 years ago
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The Devil's Pet
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6: Unveiling a Monster
Master Taehyung x reader. Submissive Jimin.
Summary: Taehyung said there would be no repercussions for the way you behaved at the party, but that rule only applied to you, not Jimin.
Trigger warning: Yandere themes, D/s themes, smut, restraint, punishment, forced erotic stimulation, orgasm denial, spanking, caning, abuse.
Chapter list
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It was like sleeping on a marshmallow. You haven't slept that well the entire time you have been here.
At exactly 8:00 am Jimin came in with a tray of breakfast. However, because of the party the night before, you didn't fall asleep until 3:00 am and were woken up by Taehyung at 7-ish, so 8 was far too early to be thinking about food.
Now at around 2:00 pm, it's a much more comfortable time to be woken by the abrupt opening of curtains and the sudden intrusion of daylight.
"Miss, I am sorry. But Master Kim is awake and I do not think it is wise to be sleeping while he is about." He re-hands you the cloche serving tray full of hot food. He must have remade them. Unless this is a magic cloche that keeps food warm for 6 hours. But most likely this servile boy went out of his way to make new food for you after the first batch went untouched.
"No, it's fine. It feels strange to sleep till such a time anyway. Namjoon would definitely have fired me if I showed up to work at 2 in the afternoon." You say. With a subtle smile, Jimin is trying to remain engaged in the conversation but he's kind of socially awkward. He can be forgiven though. Having your entire life focused around attending to a Masters's needs would make anyone confused about normal social behaviour.
"Will that be all, Miss?" He asks barely above a squeak.
"Ah, so-um," You're trying to think of something to make this conversation flow. A week in and you still know nothing about this flower child. "Yeah. Um-so, how old are you?" You swing your feet over the edge of the bed, with a satisfying crunch of toast as you stuff your mouth.
"I am 26 Miss."
"Wow. I could have sworn you were younger. You look heaps younger." You nod fervently trying to draw him in. But all you get is a blank, confused expression and a small nod back. Think. You click your tongue, "Ah, so how long have you worked here?" Another inspired spontaneously constructed question. You are determined to get him to converse. You are used to interacting with lively, vivacious people and seeing as everyone you have contact with at the moment are; one timorous boy and one egotistical narcissist, you'll have to work with what you're given.
"M-Miss, I have chores to attend to." He says looking back to the door longingly. 
"Oh. Oh yeah, no worries. I get it." You rush awkwardly. He bows, his eyes revealing relief. "Just one last question. Do you-do you like working for Taehyung?"
A small genuine smile peaks onto his face. "Yes. Master Kim is caring and kind. I very much appreciate being able to serve him." 
You can accept his declaration as honest, but you just don't understand it.
If Jimin is being truthful, which he very much seems to be, then that means there are multiple sides to Kim Taehyung. So far though, you have only seen the rude, arrogant, manipulative side of him. You wouldn't even think to attach the words caring or kind to such a man and you don't know how Jimin can. Not after the number of injuries you have seen on him in only 8 days.
*******
"Where did you put my clothes?" Fresh from a shower, you ask after your very meagre belongings. Looking through the walk-in closet doors the space is empty. In place of Jimin's reply, Taehyung interrupts instead.
"I ordered them thrown out." He says steadily. His sudden deep timbre catches you off guard. 
"What? Why?!" You bluster in response, spinning around and are further startled by a shirtless Elite in sweatpants.
"They were abhorrent. You will be provided new clothing once you are more tamed." He sounds almost proud of himself.
His words replay in your head as you have to force yourself to shift your fixation from his chest to his face, feeling your mouth getting dry. It takes a few seconds for you to process what he has said, but as the realization of what he said dawns on you, you become riddled with irritation.
"Are you kidding me?" You scowl, shaking your head. "You must have been wasted last night cause for a moment there you actually seemed human. But you're still just as much of an asshole as I thought you were." 
Jimin holds his hand out for you mid-sentence, offering to accept your towel. Your wild, aggressive movements as you flick it into his arms almost feels like punctuation to your irritated chiding.
Ugh, caring and kind my ass. Jimin must have been brainwashed.
"Come here pet." Taehyung's smirk grows from subtle to prominent, looking like one and the same with all of the conceited jerks from last night. Pointing to the space at his feet he calls you to it like a dog.
Your face skews in detest and you shake your head to replace the word no, feeling it almost slipping free in frustration. "You got rid of all my clothes without even asking me. You can come here!" You scoff, pointing at your feet. Annoyingly it doesn't claw any reaction from him. 
While you understand they were only clothes they were literally the last things in the entire world that you owned and he threw them out without a care or thought. What happens when you are finally able to leave? You'll have nothing.
"Come here." He enunciates. 
Gritting your teeth you have to stop yourself from outright screaming, "Do you even care that you threw away everything I own?"
"Last warning pet, here. Now." He snaps his fingers, signalling again to the space under him. His arrogance making your blood boil.
"No!" You shout back, his derogatory tone obliterating all sense. Ugh. Instantly your forehead scrunches, realizing your mistake.
The sharpness of the collar overcomes you, dropping you onto the cold tiles. Its painful swell feels so much more intense than in previous times. Hot pain spiking and rippling throughout your body in a wave of burning agony. Catching your breath in your chest while you endure it.  
In the aftermath, your face is pressed against the ceramic. The soothing cool helps with the residual pain that is ebbing through you. 
"I have a task for you," Now standing over you, Taehyung offers his hand for you to accept. With deliberate showy intention, you reject it. Stiffly rolling onto your back. Raising onto your elbows. Glaring at him the whole while. 
Intertwining his fingers he squats beside you. Signalling over your shoulder he calls Jimin into the mix. Catching sight of a glint of purpose in his eye makes you nervous.
His servant passes in front of you, standing to the right of his Master. Handing over a thin metalic rod with a gripped handle made from braided leather. A cane. It's a bendable material, a bit thicker than a straw but nearly half a meter long. Looking as light as plastic but as sturdy as steel.
Your jaw stiffens. Your face becomes heated. "If you try to hit me with that, I'll shove it up your ass!" A breathiness to your voice quashes the potency of your threat. Not delivering it as menacingly as you had intended. Lifting up, you lean on your palms, trying to get into a more defensible position. 
The hairs on the back of your neck stand up as Taehyung holds it out for you to take. Apprehensive and unsure, you still decide to take it though. It's better to have it in your hands than his. 
"Jimin, undress," The Elite instructs without a spared glance. But of course, his servant follows immediately, dropping his shirt to the floor.
Utterly unprepared for what you are piecing together, you watch Jimin with wide eyes. His soft blonde hair is hanging over his face as he tries, unsuccessfully, to hide the shame in his sea-blue eyes.
"You are going to punish Jimin for his disobedience last night." Taehyung takes the bad you assumed and manages to make it worse. Your stomach churns from his horrendous words and reactively you hurl the cane away from you, flinging it to the opposite side of the room.
There is no chance in hell that you are doing that!
You shake your head in a continuous motion, slowly beginning to scoot backwards. "I'm not doing that." You scowl, dismissing the idea flatly. If he thinks you would ever do anything like that to anyone, let alone Jimin, he is out of his mind.
"Don't you first want to know what he did?" He straightens up, following to where the cane landed. You take the chance to scurry to your feet also, improving your defensive stance.
Shaking your head again vehemently you're at a loss of what to say. You want to defend Jimin but are also cautious of saying anything out of fear of worsening this situation. You clearly have a terrible track record and this time it's not just you at risk. 
You're at a loss. You can not imagine a reason for anyone to hurt this sweet young man, but you especially can not comprehend any cause for Taehyung, who Jimin serves so completely and wholeheartedly, to hurt him. You had seen a handful of bumps and bruises colouring him in the past few days, and while that made you feel terrible enough, what Taehyung is suggesting now is just barbaric.
"What did he do?" You ask, trying to give off the impression of calm and reason but mostly to buy time.
He brings the cane back to you and again holds it out for you. Clenching your fists, you ball up your hands behind your back refusing to accept it. Internally screaming no over and over. He only shrugs at your near childish, defiant refusal.
"Jimin, what did you do wrong?" The Master prods response.
A red blush spans across Jimin's cheeks, highlighting the freckles under his eyes. His lips slightly turn down at their corners and in a fleeting glimpse, you can see them waver before he quickly composes himself. "During the past evening's event, Master wanted Miss Y/n to behave as she normally would. I interfered, telling her to be more polite towards his guests."
That's the reason? That's not a reason! He should be happy, grateful even for Jimin stopping you from driving his friends away. Not using it as some flimsy, half baked reason to punish him!
"And why did you do this?" Taehyung probes further, swinging the cane over his shoulder.
"I didn't wish for Miss Y/n to do something that would cause repercussions in the future."
Your heart melts. This can't be real. He is getting punished because of you? Again. This is like your worst nightmare. How do you keep being the cause of this guy's suffering!
Taehyung walks around behind Jimin, running his hand through his slave's mousy blonde mop of hair, tugging on it lightly. Seeing them standing so close, Jimin is much shorter than his Elite. He is maybe 2 inches or so taller than you, but in comparison, it looks as if he is being towered by Taehyung.
"Little pet, when it comes to you our Jimin here seems to have a soft spot. And while I encourage my property to get along, I will not accept this new disobedient behaviour from my servant. Am I understood Jimin?" He redirects the questioning.
"Yes, Master. I am sorry, please forgive me." He begs with a sturdy, passionate sincerity. His timerous voice cracking slightly. 
Brushing back Jimin's hair, Taehyung circles to the front of his repentant slave. Standing tall and lofty. "You are forgiven. Make sure you learn from your punishment." He hushes, the adage intended to be heard by the 2 of them only. "Y/n come here. You are going to administer Jimin's punishment." He restates as if the added information of why Jimin is being punished will somehow have made you compliant.
"No." You say resolutely. 
The collar doubles you over before you even get your breath out. You try and fight to stay standing but fail, crashing onto your side in a miserable heap.
Ugh, that fucking word!
You can hear Taehyung chuckling above you as if he is enjoying your distress. Sadistic fuck!
Inside your mind you are screaming, passionately arguing and unequivocally telling him that 'You can shock me all you want, but there is no fucking way I am hurting him!' But outside of your thoughts you can only pant and heave. Gasping to pull in any oxygen. A pain in your head throbbing so intensely that your eyesight is blurring.
"Fine," he concludes, the torture of the collar finally dimming, "then come here." This time, instead of to his feet he points at the training chain still bolted to the floor.
Shaking your head with a groan, you try and fail to get yourself into any kind of upright position. You've not yet had even 12 hours of freedom from that freaking chain. You're not getting hooked back up to it without a fight. 
"I am not going to ask again Y/n. Here. Now." His growled demand drops his voice a whole octave. The gruffness and displeasure laced in it is unsettling, but it will not change your answer. He can ask as many times as he wants to, but the answer is going to remain no. "What do you expect to achieve from shaking your head," He chuckles. "I can't force you to swing the cane, but this I can make you do. You either come of your own volition or I hurt you and then drag you here. In either case, you obey."
It's absolutely infuriating that he's right. There is too much injustice in the world if this man is able to have all the power and money he could ever need and yet he only uses it to beat helpless serfs, knock over old ladies, and keep you tied to the floor. He doesn't deserve the title or the benefits of being an Elite. He deserves to have his ass kicked!
Walking into your personal space Taehyung strikes an imposing figure. Still, you try to hold your ground, unwilling to let him think he has the upper hand. It's all for naught though, bending over he hooks into the ring of your collar moving faster than you can counter. And by the time you flinch he already yanks you forward. Turning you into an ungraceful series of flailed limbs as he all but drags you along the tiles. 
Throwing his hand down in the centre of the room he tosses you to the floor like you are nothing. His knee resting on your shoulder keeps you pinned down as he fastens the lock, fixing you to the floor once again.  
With a slew of vile insults and foul language ready to spit forth, Taehyung preemptively interjects.
"You are not going to speak until I tell you. If you do, there will be severe consequences. Do you understand pet?" He asks, encircling Jimin, standing at his back with the cane in hand as before.
Jimin is motionless looking downs at his interlaced fingers. His uncovered chest rising and lowering in small quick breaths. A subtle expression of unease in his eyes.
You can't believe he is actually going to do this. This is so sick.
Taehyung draws his arm back swinging the rod over Jimin's bare back. A frightening crack ricochets through the room. The blow is so powerful that Jimin's entire body lurches forward. His right foot stepping out of place to brace himself and return to position. But still, he doesn't make a sound. Even though discomfort is apparent on his face, his eyes are watering and his jaw is clenched, he doesn't make a peep. 
"Stop it!" You roar, the outburst scratching your throat. You race onto your feet, trying to get to Jimin, to help him, knowing he won't help himself. Though momentarily you forget the chain is keeping you pinned until it catches and jerks you back to the ground. Hitting the tiles with a hefty thud. "Stop." You whine with a deflated moan.
Looking up your heart briefly sings with elation as Taehyung actually comes away from Jimin. Walking over to you with the cane once again poised over his shoulder.
"Is there something wrong with your hearing, or is it common sense you lack? I warned you that there would be severe consequences if you spoke." He scolds coarsely. His harsh tone makes your stomach sink and replaces all relief with anxiety. "You've just earned Jimin another 5 lashes." Bending over he flexes the sturdy rod behind his shoulders.
You feel nothing but panic.
He has to be kidding. He has to be saying that just to make his point. Right?
"Okay, fine." You try to backtrack out of harm. Hoping to cool the situation. "I won't talk anymore, okay." You consign breathily, shaking your hands. Being painfully aware in this moment, more than any other, that he holds all the power.
Chuffing, he stands upright, flicking his hair back. "It must be common sense." He smiles coldly. "That's another 5. Care to keep going."
No fucking way!
You open your mouth to protest but bite back your rage. Shaking your head in disbelief. He can't do this! 
Your focus moves to Jimin hoping to get any sign or input from him on how to proceed, however, he is unchanged. His eyes fastened on the floor. 
This is insanity. You can not understand either of their reactions. Not the cruelty. Not the complicity. How are you supposed to sit here and allow this to happen? How can you do anything more and risk hurting Jimin further? 
Observing your silence through your noticeable internal struggle the Elite seems satisfied with your concession. Sauntering backwards with a prominent smile, he returns behind Jimin. Your stomach churns as you watch him start again, knowing whatever the number, you've added 10 more of those vicious hits that Jimin will have to survive. 
Watching for your reaction Taehyung delivers an unrelenting strike. Your heart breaks hearing the snap. It spikes the hairs on the back of your neck. And a shiver runs across your entire body as he falls into a rhythm cracking hit after hit against Jimin's back. The number swiftly soaring into double digits. 
Too quickly, the fragile boy is not able to contain his cries any longer. Tears rolling down his face, his lip firmly bitten between his teeth to quiet himself. It's harrowing to watch. Strike after strike you see his position hunching. Little by little he is bending to the furiosity of the cane, trying desperately to remain upright. His hands by his sides quaking in clenched fists. 
As the numbers reach the 20s your hands are tightly bunched over your ears, frantically wanting to shut out the sharp sounds of his flesh being stricken. You are trying beyond measure to keep your mouth shut, wanting more than anything to beg the merciless Elite to stop. Wielding all of your willpower to keep yourself from doing that. 
Unable to support his own weight any longer, Jimin's legs buckle under him. Now knelt and trying immensely to keep himself from further collapse, a puddle of tears has formed below him. His chest, stomach and face washed with tears. Muted sobs of pain causing his shoulders to shudder.
But Taehyung, who appears indifferent to his anguish, doesn't cease.
Right when you're on the brink of exploding an air of stillness fills the room. Your eyes dart to the two of them praying that this is the end and are alleyed to see Taehyung stepping to the side, throwing the cane onto the bed. A pleased glow about him. 
"You may now speak."
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" You scream. Leaping again to your feet. With a higher stance, you are able to see over Jimin fully. His back is wrapped in long red welts that cross and overlap. Littered with marks that have already begun to purple and raise and are lined by strips of cut and broken skin, and dark bruises. "You're sick! You're a monster!"
"Careful pet." He warns with far too much amusement. He is still so unused to being yelled at that he nevertheless regards your outbursts as entertaining. 
You hate him so much! "Fuck you!" In opposition to your fury, he laughs. 
Invading your space, he has you stepping back quickly reaching the limit of the chain. He doesn't come at you, however. Instead, he uses the biolock at the base of the restrains to free it and with a forceful tug tears you onto the floor. Sprawled out on your stomach, you push yourself up right away, only to have his weight secure you. 
All your struggling, all your swearing and fighting is for nothing. Too easily he drags your hands behind your back and, using the length of chain still joined to you, restains them. 
"Get off me!" You bark, kicking your legs. Resisting with all your might. 
Wrapping the metal around your forearms a few times he brings the loose end back over your shoulder and clips it to the collar's ring. Your arms are crossed over one another, bound to your back, holding your chest stretched, and pulling the collar into your throat. While also being crushed against the floor you are nearly not able to inhale. Your fight petering as your focus is consumed by trying to stop yourself from choking. 
"Jimin, you can leave," Taehyung calls back over his shoulder. Making you feel both relieved ad abandoned as you hear Jimin hurriedly flee from the room.
Gasping as he hoists you up, you instantly are able breathe easier. At the same moment, your fight is reinvigorated but his sheer strength has him immovable and no matter how you struggle he continues to lead you towards the bed. 
Sitting down first he drags you over his lap. His legs digging into your gut, your face smothered into the blankets. 
"Get off," you shriek feeling one of his hands sliding down your lower back, cupping your butt, his other hand is pressing you into his thighs, making sure that your efforts to break free are futile. "Fuck off!"
"I'll give you one chance to apologise, pet." He says calmly. However, the vale is omitted from his threat. His fingertips digging into the meat of your ass. 
Your anger won't settle. How dare he tell you to apologise after he unjustly beat Jimin. After everything he has done! 
"No! Never!" You growl, fully prepared to feel the sting of the collar.
As it kicks in you wince expecting pain but are instead filled with a pleasurable warmth that spreads through your body, down to the tips of your toes. A flood of tingles rushing to your core, making your hips ache in instantaneous desire. 
No, no! Not this.
"I'm sure you'll regret your decision." He taunts with a haughty chuckle. 
Holding you still, Taehyung's palm comes down swiftly on your ass. You swallow a gasp, biting your teeth together firmly. Your mind spinning in confusion realizing his strike isn't near the intensity that you witnessed him beating Jimin with. While there was a very mild sting it is far more temperate than you had expected. And even more unexpectedly the smack sent sparks swarming down your legs, up your back, and through your centre. Exacerbating the lustful impact of the collar. 
You count the hits internally. Feeling each and every one building a throb within you. Feeling your pussy start to gush. It's unravelling you sooner than you can preserve your composure. With your leg kicking up at the knee, you desperately attempt to hold yourself together and stop yourself from reacting in the way that your body wants to. But on the 7th hit, his large hand slips around the curve of your ass, rubbing the inside of your naked thigh and you intrinsically move to accommodate him. Spreading your legs. Lifting your ass higher. 
He swats you again and this time you don't have the sense to deny a moan that pours out. Your hips fully bucking back into his hand. 
Hit after hit, and like Jimin you reach a succession of 20. But unlike Jimin, you don't want him to stop. In fact, you want more. Your overflowing, juices running down your trembling legs. The steady build-up of the collar's effect seems enough to bring you pleasure, but not enough to give you any relief. You're needy. Salacious. And painfully aware of how empty you are.
You need to be touched. You need something. You wish his fingers would push inside you- they're so close, you can't take it anymore. You need to be filled. 
But you can't. You know what he is trying to do and you can not bring yourself to say it. You're not going to ask him for it. You're not going to apologise either. You've done nothing wrong. Jimin did nothing wrong. 
You don't know what kind of fucked up manipulation this is, but no matter how hard it is Taehyung isn't going to get anything from you. Not this way. Not any way.
With a final hard smack, one that truly hurts, he throws you off him. Pushing you back onto the bed in an unstable heap. The weight of your own body crushing your arms. Leaving you to struggle as he disappears from your sight. 
You can't believe how much of a mess you are right now. Even laying here, not being touched in any way you can feel the heat swarming through you. No matter how your thoughts are fighting against it, how entirely you know that this is only caused by a device stimulating electrical pulses in your brain, you can not control or dim how absolutely ravenous you are. You feel like you're going crazy. 
All you can do is try to keep yourself quiet and wait for him to shut it off. 
Grabbing you by the ankle, he unexpectedly drags you over to the edge of the bed. Shoving and maneuvering you as he likes he rolls you onto your stomach. Reaching around the front of you he separates the chain from the collar, slowly unwrapping you, giving you a moment of alleviation from the pressure on your arms until the pins and needles set in and you begin to swarm with static. 
Unfinished with his fierce demands, he doesn't allow even a moment to stretch. Throwing something long and hard on the bed he tosses you onto your back once again. 
The next part happens all to quickly. You try to sit up but are thrown down. Catching a glimpse of a smirk on Taehyung's face, you see out of the corner of your eye him moving the foreign object around until it is above your head. Using one hand to move your arms up and over the edge of the bed, and the other to hold you down, in 1, 2 swift motions he binds your hands in place. 
Craning your head back, you can see he has locked you into a silver, solid metal bar with immoveable metal cuffs crafted on either end. The bar is on the other side of the bedpost and you're on the mattress, trapping you to the bed's frame. 
This is deranged. Why are you always locked up?!
Even as your anger flares up, your heart pounding in your chest, the waves of pleasure never cease inside you. To a point that the 2 opposing sensations start to clash, overwhelming you. Your eyes watering. You can't even think of what to say. You just need him to turn it off now.
Taking a moment. Pausing to look over you and admire the predicament you're in his hand runs around your neck, lingering just under the band. His gentle caress only furthing the harassment of lust on your body. 
"Little pet," he purrs provocatively. "This," intentionally he punctuates his word by tapping the collar. "This simple little toy, that is making you feel so good at the moment," his fingers trail lower, gliding between your bare breasts. His nails scratching you lightly, ripping a moan from you as electricity shoots from your brain down through your stomach to your dripping, aching pussy. "is going to stay on until I hear that apology from you. However long that might take." 
You're stuck there in shock, starting to pant. Your mouth going dry as you tug and pull on the restraint, bashing it against the wood post searching for any give. 
"And since you've been so very disrespectful, I expect you to think of some way to make it up to me, otherwise I may just reject your apology and see how long I can keep you on the brink of ecstasy until you break."
You want to say sorry. You want to ask him to stop, or more honestly to keep going and to let you cum, but you can't bring yourself to say it. Pride and hubris won't let you. 
And neither apparently will Taehyung. Not sparing you the chance to gather yourself or your thoughts, he turns on heel with a wink. The soft click of the door echoing among the clanking of your binds. 
You've got to be fucking kidding me. 
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champagne-bucky · 4 years ago
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Debt to Be Paid: I
Summary: Earth fears intergalactic war with another planet. The Avengers are called to work out negotiations on Zevitar, the planet of peace. What happens when they are reunited with their long lost team member?
Warnings: dark!Bucky x reader, mentions of non/dub-con, age gap (reader is of age) 
Notes: SHE’S HEREEEEEEE!!! Welcome to the first chapter of DTBP, the sequel to IOU!! If you’re new to this story make sure you check out IOU before you read this!! To all those who have read IOU... buckle up... Anyways enjoy!! Let me know what ya think! Please make sure to like, comment, reblog, inbox, and follow me for more! Enjoy :) 
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Throughout his lifetime Steve Rogers was exposed to many types of pain. Whether it was physical, mental, or emotional, Steve could handle just about anything life could throw at him. That was until he lost you. In all his years of fighting alongside the Avengers, having been responsible for the demise of half the world’s population, and the tons of toxic chemicals pumped into his body could never prepare him for the pain of losing a child. While there is no biological relation, Steve couldn’t help but mourn for the loss of his daughter.
When Sam and Tony had come to the island to end his vacation they were trying to keep quiet about the situation that occurred back home. It wasn’t until three hours into the flight back home that Tony finally cracked and told Steve what was up. Steve was in shock, his daughter fought and nearly killed his best friend? Impossible.
Needless to say, Steve Rogers was an emotional wreck once he got back to the compound. He saw the state of Bucky’s room, he saw where they kept you locked up, he saw the damage that had been done to Stephen and Wanda when you escaped. He saw parts of you that he never knew you held. How dark had you become since he left, he wondered on those late sleepless nights.
Steve didn’t speak for days. Instead, he spent them walking around the taped off ruins of his beloved compound. What was once a home for him and his family felt more like a cold, steel, jail cell. He was truly in hell without you.
The nights were filled with him lying awake in bed, eyes opened wide and darting to every corner of the room, praying that you would somehow walk out of the shadows and back to him. Instead of taking sleeping pills that Tony suggested to him, he would get up out of bed and start researching, questioning, and theorizing where it is that you could be.
After a few weeks and two overworked coffee machines later, Steve had created three possible theories about what could have happened to you:
Being an Avenger came with a handful of enemies.  
Almost everyone on the team had their own enemies. From empty threats to stalker incidences, no one on the team was really safe. Any form of social media was constantly monitored, every time they were in a car there was security two cars behind, the second an Avenger leaves the tower they have surveillance on them 99.9% of the time.
Still, that .1% haunts Steve. He knows that people have their ways when it comes to the innovation of technology. Perhaps there was someone out there that was too good with computers. They hacked you, stalked you, and threatened you not to tell anyone. Maybe it got so out of hand to the point where you ran away for the protection of yourself and for the others. Maybe you attacked Bucky to keep the secret hidden or you got so scared that attacking him was an accident.
    2.   Everyone has their demons… maybe you had kept yours hidden too well.
As days grew longer, so did Steve’s suspicions. He never thought bad things about you. In fact, Steve knew there wasn’t a bad bone in your body. So why did he keep thinking you were secretly an evil person?
He theorized that there could’ve been another side to who you were. The nice and sweet you was all an act and you were waiting for an opportunity to show your true self. Between him not being around anymore and you now having full access to technology and weapons only Avengers have access to, you took advantage of your new found status and got carried away. Bucky found out and tried to put a stop to you and that’s how he ended up getting attacked. You broke out before you could face any consequences.
Steve shook his head at this theory. He knew you like he knew the layout of his old 40’s apartment. You’re not a bad person and never once have you said you hated someone. You never said you even hated Bucky, just upset that he didn’t seem to like you as much as the others did.
  3.  Being apart from Steve sent you towards a downwards spiral… basically it was all Steve’s fault that you’re gone.
This theory made a whole lot of sense, and none of it at the same time. Yes, everyone could confirm that you really missed Steve. You missed training with him and hanging out with him. You missed his presence around the compound as well. Something about Steve just made your days way better than when he wasn’t at the compound at all.
What didn’t make sense to anybody was why would you attack someone over this? Sure, you missed Steve, but nobody thought you missed him so much to the point of nearly killing someone. Bucky did give you a hard time, but as far as the Avengers knew it was just some name calling you didn’t appreciate.
Everyone recounted their last few days with you at the compound. You seemed okay, nothing out of the usual for you. However, Peter did speak up saying you seemed a bit jumpier and a little bit down and out than usual. Again, it chalked up to you missing Steve really bad. Then there was the matter of Stephen and Wanda.
They were your last victims before you escaped. The pair had gone through extensive questioning. However, they both had the same story. Wanda and Strange had tried to calm you down, but things got out of hand and you ended up lashing out at them.
Steve hit a brick wall at this point. How could no one know what happened to you? He tried hacking into security cameras from that day, but he was met with a disappointing glare from Tony and a handful of security to escort him out of the room meant for their investigation.
What was there even to investigate? You were gone and as far as anybody knew, there was no trace of you in New York, the United States, and pretty much any other country that agents were sent out to look for you. Steve guessed they only continued because Bucky needed to get some sort of justice or closure, but he swears that he was attacked for no reason. Everyone knew about their slight tension, but thought it wouldn’t go as far as leaving Bucky hospitalized.
Bucky kept quiet after Steve came back. Truth be told, he feared what his friend might do to him if the truth got out. He made sure to delete any evidence he could off his computer of you. When he visited you those last days, he managed to fuck up something in the control room that cut off the audio of him talking. No one had called him in to question his meeting with you, and Bucky was relieved because he needed more time to come up with the perfect excuse.
Now all he had to do was get rid of Wanda and Stephen, or get them off his back. He knows that they must know something. Tensions around the compound have been high around the three of them. The pair had been cold towards him after the attack, only going so far as signing a ‘Get Well Soon’ card and pitching in a few dollars for a thing of flowers, but that was all.
Wanda and Strange wasted no time after their questioning was over. They got right to work trying to compile all the evidence they could to expose Bucky. Unfortunately, it was proving to be more difficult than expected.
Bucky’s room had been blocked off by agents. He had to change rooms until the investigation was cleared. Everything in the room remained untouched, but no Avengers, besides Tony, had access to the room.
Strange and Wanda even went in from another angle and enlisted Peter to help find that security footage, but so far everything was blocked off to them. It seemed like there was one dead end after another. If the pair weren’t fast in their findings, they might never get justice for you. Even if you were long gone, Bucky shouldn’t get away with what he did.
No matter what, the pair of Avengers new they needed to finish the job you attempted to start… and Stephen Strange and Wanda Maximoff will be damned if justice wasn’t served.
~Meanwhile~
You emptied your stomach of breakfast later in the day. Same as yesterday, the day before that, and the day before that… something’s got to be up?
Maybe it was nerves? That could explain a lot seeing as the nightmares weren’t letting up anytime soon.
Seeing images of Bucky Barnes every time you close your eyes led to a lot of sleepless nights. It led to much more than sleepless nights, but you tried your best to listen to Carol’s advice and put the past behind you. Sadly, it would take a lot more than blocking that vile man from your thoughts.
Carol saw how you were feeling sick everyday. She also tried to put the worst out of her head, but curiosity piqued. It was important for her to tell you, but it was also important that you found out now before you were back on your home planet alone and scared.
When she first suggested that you may be pregnant, you laughed in her face, then you cried, then were angry, then depressed. There was no possible way, right? You remembered to take your birth control every night, right?
Okay, now you were freaking out. There was one night you might’ve forgot to take it, and that time spent in your jail cell, and maybe one or twice while on a mission.
Now you were panicking.
You forgot some days to take birth control, you were off it for a couple of days too. Bucky was relentless. The possibilities were leading towards confirmation. Every sign of pregnancy pointed to yes.
You tried to deny it for a week, but as you looked at the remnants of today’s breakfast being flushed down the toilet again you collected yourself and came towards acceptance. Coming out of the bathroom, Carol was right there with a quirked brow. She was about to say something, but you opened your mouth first.
“FUCK!”
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phis-corner · 4 years ago
Text
demon’s daughter
I didn’t expect people to like this? Here’s chapter two!
Masterlist Chapter 1 [Chapter 2] Chapter 3
“Again.” Shiva’s commanding voice rang through the training room. “Straighten your hind leg to maintain your balance.”
Three year old Marinette obeyed, launching her small body into another series of attacks on the training dummy with her fists.
“Again. Your form was sloppy.”
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Again.”
The pattern continued until she was too exhausted to hold herself up and collapsed. Shiva tutted. “Still weak. I suppose we will have to end there for today. Dismissed.” 
Marinette painstakingly picked herself off the ground and made her way back to her tiny living quarters.
.o0o.
Marinette parried another strike from her trainer, unflinching as the blades clashed millimeters away from her face. Her five year old arms shook with the effort to hold the blade there, and she ducked and rolled when the strain became too much.
She turned just in time to meet another strike before knocking her trainer’s blade to the side and slashing with her own katana. They trade blows back and forth until she sees another woman with auburn hair enter the courtyard, followed by a boy that has her hair and facial features.
The moment of hesitation is enough. Her trainer’s katana slashes across her chest, tearing through her skin and flesh and definitely scraping a lung. The pain is something she has never felt before, and she had already gone through the first round of torture resistance.
It burned, and she couldn’t breathe. The last thing she sees before everything goes black is Lady Shiva’s frown, the boy’s look of mild curiosity, and the concern that flashed through the auburn-haired woman’s eyes before she stuffed it down.
.o0o.
Marinette woke in the sickly green waters of the Lazarus Pit with a new bloodthirsty voice in her head. The first healer that came to check on her was murdered with her bare hands. As was the second, and the third.
It took months to learn to control the voice, the urges to kill. When she realized she had taken another three lives, she cried, but only when she was alone. Crying is a weakness that she could not show.
She returns to her room after another day of training to find the auburn-haired woman from a few months ago sitting on her bed.
The woman introduces herself as Talia al Ghul, and tells Marinette that she is her mother.
Her grandfather is the Demon’s Head, and the boy she saw, her twin brother, Damian, is his heir.
Marinette asks why she is ranked so low if her brother is the Prince. Talia’s eyes harden.
“Ra’s is a fool. He believes that women are not worthy of power, and can do nothing to maintain it. But you will prove him wrong, daughter. I refuse to raise an unworthy child.”
Marinette trains harder after that.
.o0o.
But harder isn’t always enough.
The second time she died, it wasn’t because she was not a capable fighter.
The second round of torture resistance took place a year and a half after her first death. She withstood the pain, only letting out the tiniest whimper in the beginning, which earned her another ten lashes, but in the end, her body gave up from the injuries. 
She bled out, still bound in chains, and woke up in the Pit again, the murderous voice back with a new vengeance.
Marinette accidentally took another life, but she promised herself it wouldn’t happen again. She would gain control of this madness. She would.
She refused to think of what would happen if she didn’t.
.o0o.
When she turns nine, Lady Shiva deems her worthy enough to claim her spot as the Princess of the League, and so she moved into the larger quarters, meant for the family of the Demon’s Head.
Talia was proud, but she did not outwardly express it. Marinette read it in her body, the way she was trained to.
Her twin brother was… distant. He refused to accept a sibling, refused to accept that she can be the Princess while he is the Heir. He acted just like Ra’s, the man he will grow up to replace.
Marinette supposed they saw her as unworthy not only because of her gender, but because of her deaths. She thought that Damian might have died too, had the trainers not been too afraid to kill the Demon’s Heir. She doesn’t point it out. It wouldn’t do her any good.
One month after she moved in, Ra’s demanded that she spar Damian. Talia and Ra’s bore witness to the spar.
Damian drew his katana, scowling at her all the while. Marinette remained unfazed and took her own battle stance opposite him, feeling the comforting weight of her steel war fans in her hands.
They launched at each other at the same time, slashing and parrying and slicing and dodging. Damian gives her a shallow cut on her right cheekbone. Marinette retaliates with a slice on the forehead. The spar goes on for three hours before Ra’s ends it, having seen that there will be no winner.
Ra’s was hard to please. Marinette did pass his judgement for being worthy in battle, but he would never fully accept her the way he did his grandson. That was alright by her. Ra’s was not the kind of person she wished to have the opinion of anyway.
Damian was also a lot more willing to talk to her after that spar, and Marinette finally learned what it was like to have a companion her own age, even if he was a bit arrogant and rude at times.
.o0o.
Marinette flies awake with a start, and for a moment, she forgets where she is. Wayne Manor. Father. Safe.
“Good morning, ukhti.” Damian greets, rubbing the last bits of sleep from his eyes. “Did you sleep well?”
Marinette snorts derisively, sliding easily off the top bunk and landing lightly on the floor. “Do I ever, akhi?”
Damian’s face softens. “It is still early. Would you like to spar to get your mind off things?”
“Of course.” Marinette gives her twin a rare smile. “We must change into more suitable clothes first though.”
Ten minutes later, the twins silently creep out of their room and start the hunt for the training room, exploring the Manor as they go. It takes half an hour to find the correct location. Marinette and Damian occupy opposite sides of the sparring mat as they start warming up.
Marinette relishes the pull of her muscles as she stretches, the feeling grounding her into reality. Once they finish, they settle into their fighting positions, each eyeing the other apprehensively.
Damian makes the first move, as the more aggressive of the two. Marinette swiftly dodges his fist and sends a quick kick to his chest. He catches her foot and uses her own momentum to throw her over his shoulder. Marinette twists as she falls, and hits the ground in a perfect three-point landing. She lunges again, and Damian charges forward to meet her in a whirl of fists and kicks, blocks and blows.
At some point, they notice Alfred enter the room, but he merely stands off to the side and watches, so they continue sparring. Not long after, he is followed by a lithe young woman with short black hair, a pale teen who has massive eye bags, and a familiar man with a white streak in his dark hair.
Cassandra Cain. Timothy Drake. Jason Todd. Batgirl, Robin, and Red Hood. Alfred clears his throat, and both of them part, barely even sweating.
“Is something the matter, Pennyworth?” Damian asks in a snobby tone that makes Marinette want to smack him over the head (didn’t his training ever cover socialization? Hers definitely did, but maybe that’s because she was a female.) so she does so. 
Being treated as a prince from birth certainly inflated his ego. Damian glares, but does not retaliate. Good. He knows he is being rude.
“I wished to inform you that breakfast is ready and the rest of the family wanted to come and meet the two of you.” Alfred says neutrally. 
Cassandra then gives them a friendly smile and a wave, while the boys stay where they are, calculating eyes roving over them. Marinette can’t really judge them for that- she has already scanned all of them for weaknesses too, though there weren’t many.
Damian sniffs. “I do not see why Father chooses to keep these imbeciles around now that he has a blood son and blood daughter.” Marinette smacks him on the head again, because his attitude is getting a little irritating.
“They are not here for you to demean, brother.” She hisses in Icelandic. “Father has deemed them family because they have proved themselves worthy. You well treat them with respect, or I will treat you the way you treat them.” Damian grumbles, but thankfully quiets.
Marinette quickly gives the others a small curtsy. “My apologies for my brother. He can be quite abrasive, but he is learning. It is an honor to meet those whom our father considers family.”
Cassandra responds first, patting each of them lightly on the shoulder, making sure to keep her posture relaxed and non-threatening. “Sister. Brother.”
Jason and Damian stare each other down, and Marinette internally sighs. Men and their need to have… what was that phrase I read online? The biggest penis energy? Jason breaks the silence. 
“Damian al Ghul. Ibn al Xu’ffasch. Grandson of Ra’s al Ghul, Heir to the Demon’s Head. Never knew you had a sister.”
Damian shifts protective towards Marinette. “I learned of her existence last year.”
“Wait, wait, wait.” Timothy frowns. “Grandson of Ra’s al Ghul? As in the grandchildren of the man who is not only obsessed with Bruce, but also the head of the League of Assassins? These are assassin children?”
Cassandra frowns, hurt. She points to herself. “Assassin child.”
“I’ve been in the League too, Replacement.” Jason shrugs. 
“No, you don’t understand.” Timothy shakes his head. “These are Ra’s grandchildren, kids that Talia gave birth to after some questionable activities with Bruce. Who’s to say that Ra’s didn’t plant them here as moles? Why should we trust them?”
Marinette feels a pang of hurt against her will. “Ra’s al Ghul may have been my grandfather by blood, but he was never more than any other assassin in the League to me. He was the one who took me away from my brother at birth. He is the reason why I have been died twice and been revived both times by the Lazarus Pit. He is the reason why I only got to meet my twin last year, and you think I would work for him, act as a spy for him, when I finally escape the League to live with my father?”
“Whatever.” Timothy spits. “I still don’t trust you.” He pivots and walks out of the room.
Marinette reads a fear in his body language, but it isn’t fear of their skills, or fear that they might kill him. It’s a fear of being replaced, and suddenly, she understands.
“...You don’t plan on betraying us, right?” Jason asks suddenly.
Damian huffs. “Tt. Of course not, Todd. I wish to become Batman one day, and betraying Father’s cause would be extremely counterproductive to my efforts.”
Sometime during their encounter, Alfred had disappeared. Cassandra heads to the exit, and gestures for them to follow. “Come. Breakfast now.”
Timothy does not show while they eat, and neither does Father. Alfred nearly has an aneurysm when he learns that Marinette has never had chocolate (a side effect of being a low-ranked assassin) and immediately starts stuffing chocolate-covered pastries into her hands.
“I insist that you try one.” Alfred says. “You will find it quite delicious.” Marinette obediently takes a bite, and a delightfully rich flavor fills her mouth.
She has never known that food could taste so good, and says as much. Alfred’s pleased face, Damian’s small smile, and Cassandra’s grin make her feel warm inside. Evidently, there is a lot she doesn’t know about the world, but she is excited and willing to learn.
.o0o.
Marinette and Damian carry out their plan after the rest leave for patrol (sans Jason, who was still benched because of his ribs) and believe they are asleep.
They change into the darkest, most flexible clothing they can find in their room and silently slip out of the window after disabling all the alarms. Wayne Manor’s security measures are evaded with some effort, and they are out in the midst of Gotham City in almost no time at all.
 Ubu has not tried to hide at all. He is entertaining two women when they burst in, already having disabled the cameras around the area just in case.
“Leave, harlots.” Damian spits at the women, as Marinette charges the much larger man. Her steel fans glint in the light as she slashes.
Ubu does manage to escape the apartment, but the twins easily catch up to him even though he runs through the traffic. The drivers don’t seem very disturbed. It must be a normal occurrence in Gotham, to see a hulking man running from two children with swords and fans.
Damian tackles Ubu, but after a half-hearted attempt at interrogation, in which the man purposefully riles him up, he raises his sword, the angle indicating he intended to kill him.
“Akhi, no!” Marinette cries, and she sees a blur of blue and black as her brother is tackled, sword flying out of his grip. She snarls, flicking open her fans and ready to hurt whoever attacked her brother, but stops when she realizes who the man is. “Nightwing.”
Richard Grayson sighs. “The psychos keep getting younger.” 
Damian growls, launching himself at the larger man with a battle cry. The fight lasts about six minutes before Nightwing manages to tie her brother up, hanging from a streetlamp with a gag in his mouth. Marinette was trying to get them to stop all the while, to no avail, and she didn’t want to step in for fear of hurting either brother.
Nightwing turns to her. “Do I need to tie you up the hard way too?”
Marinette rolls her eyes. “Thank you for finally acknowledging my existence. If you had actually listened, Nightwing, you would know that your offer is not necessary. My name is Marinette. My twin is Damian, and we are Bruce Wayne’s biological children. Hello, older brother.”
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woah-were-halfway-there · 4 years ago
Note
Are you able to write a little something about dad Auston again?? It can be short. A day with him and just baby Mia and she’s like 3 weeks old, I know a throwback! He’s just all by himself at home with her cause y/n has so many errands Auston is off that day. He’s just their at home with her and it’s like fluff🥺 maybe he’s a bit nervous at first. When she sleeps that day she always on his chest. Their evening walk she’s strap on him. He really hiding his and Mia disguise well. Please if u can❤️
A/N: wow I really am incapable of writing something small, huh? Anyways, here you are my dear!
Word Count: 4.3k
"Ok, um, there's bottles ready in the fridge for when she gets hungry, you just have to warm them up. Oh, and her blanket is over on the couch, I think. Or is it in the nursery?"
Auston stood leaning against the doorway between the kitchen and living room, holding Mia as she slept, with an amused smirk on his lips as he watched you anxiously pace around the condo. It was your first time leaving Mia since she had been born. She was a little over three weeks old, and there was still a lot of adjusting that you and Auston were getting used to as new parents. 
With Auston's career, he was required to not be at home quite often because of away games. There were a few consecutive days that the two of you were able to stay at home together, just after Mia was born, but soon enough, he did have to leave. It wasn't easy, but it was something you both had to accept. 
You were nervous about your first time home alone with Mia, but with the help of Auston's family and Steph, you quickly adapted to it. But now it was Auston's turn, and it was all his fault too. 
He insisted that you needed a day to yourself. Although he knew you had no issue being with Mia as much as you were, he wanted you to have some time to just do whatever and not have to worry about anything else. So, as a giveback for all that you've done when it came to your daughter when he couldn't be there, he decided to book you a nail appointment that was entirely on him. It was something so simple yet meaningful because he knew how much you loved getting your nails done, but you just hadn't had the time to since Mia was born. It worked too because he made the appointment for a day that he would be in Toronto on a home game stretch, so there was no reason for you to oppose the idea. 
But then it turned into so much more.
Steph heard about Auston's plan for your day out and wanted in on it. So, she made plans for the two of you to go shopping and made reservations for a late lunch together. Again, you weren't opposed to a day out with one of your best friends either, immediately thinking of how much Steph seemingly loved spending time with you and your daughter over the past few weeks, but then you remembered one thing; Mia wouldn't be there. And that made you a little uneasy. 
Although you knew your fiancé was fully capable of taking care of your daughter, he had yet to do it on his own. He was looking forward to seeing what it'd be like. You, however, were an anxious mess. 
You did really well in hiding how stressed the whole ordeal was making you, but Auston knew. He was going to mention it, but he figured you knew that leaving Mia at home with him was bound to happen at some point, and yet, you still worried. 
"Am I forgetting something? Why do I feel like I'm forgetting something?" You asked as you came to a sudden halt and ran a hand through your hair. 
"Babe," Auston spoke up, hoping to get your attention and tell you there's no reason to stress, but should've known better. 
"I don't think I am," you continued and moved to walk through the condo once again. 
"Baby."
"You know, I could just cancel the appointment and go out with Steph another day, yeah that's fine."
"Y/N!" He finally said, loud enough to make you jump at his sudden outburst and look to him with wide eyes. Mia shifted in his arms, letting out a small noise as she briefly opened her eyes before closing them again and falling back asleep. The two of you watched her like hawks, hoping she wouldn't start fussing, and once you both realized she wasn't going to, you looked at each other again. "You need to stop stressing yourself out. You're only going out for a few hours. I can handle this."
"But Auston," you sighed. "What if she needs me, or something happens or-."
"Do you not trust me with our daughter?" He challenged, not seriously, but knowing that'd bring you back to your senses a little bit.
"Of course I do, you know that. I'm just… worried. Extremely worried."
"You have no reason to be," he replied softly and glanced down at Mia as she snuggled closer to him, a small smile dancing on his lips as she did so. "I must say, we have a pretty chill kid, you know? Doesn't stress much, just likes to eat and sleep."
"Clearly, she gets that from you."
"Funny."
You then sent him a knowing look and chuckling, before looking towards Mia and taking in how content she seemed in her dad's arms. "Do you promise to call me if anything happens?"
"Yes, you know I will," he reasoned with you. "Can even send you the updates if you really want."
"Please! Or else I may lose my mind," you told him as he stepped closer and wrapped an arm around your waist. 
"You got it," he said before leaning down to peck your lips while being mindful of the sleeping infant in his other arm. "Now, you need to go. Your appointment is in 20 minutes."
"Ok, fine," you huffed and moved from his hold to go put on your coat and boots. Once you were done, you looked back to your fiancé and daughter and couldn't help but pout a little bit, but then Auston raised his eyebrows at you as if to ask what you were still doing there. "Don't look at me like that."
"Like what?"
"Like I'm overreacting."
"You? Overreact? Never," he teased, while you rolled your eyes.
"Whatever, ok, I'm going," you responded and walked to the door. "I don't think I missed anything. Say bye to Frank for me. I also can't remember where I put Mia's blanket for the life of me."
"It's in our room," Auston told you with a laugh. "I washed it last night, now stop worrying and go have fun."
"Ok, I love you."
"Love you too."
~*~
 "Would you stop looking at your phone," Steph tsked and glared at you. She was sitting across from you as you both waited for your food to arrive after a long day of shopping and some much-needed girl time. It was because of her you hadn't called Auston every half an hour to check-in, even though you felt very inclined to do so. "I'm sure Mia is fine, Y/N."
"Oh, I'm sure she is too, but it's her father that is stressing me out," you replied and turned your phone around and started tapping so that she could see what was on the screen as well. Wondering what could possibly be going on, Steph gave you a look before glancing at the device and watching, soon having to stifle her laughter before it got too loud.
You had Instagram open, and one of the first things you noticed was that Auston posted on his story. Naturally, you were curious and wasted no time tapping on his little profile picture to see what it was. 
The first picture was of Mia asleep on your fiancè's chest as he very clearly was lying on the couch. Frank was in it too, curled up by Auston's feet and the words' dad duty' were typed out in small blue font near the top left corner, making you melt a little bit at just how sweet it was. With the way Mia's face couldn't really be seen, you could tell she was snuggling up against her dad like she always did, and Auston being, well, Auston, had gone out of his way to not show her too much either. He was very private and protective in general, but once your daughter was born, it got escalated. He was even more careful about the things he posted, especially when they came to her. 
In fact, it wasn't until the next parts of his story that you realized this was the first Mia related thing he's shared on social media other than a picture he posted of him holding her in the hospital just hours after she was born. 
The next slide was a video of Mia stirring awake and stretching all while Auston's left hand was placed on her back protectively before cutting just as she was about to look towards the camera. It was ridiculously cute, but then you noticed how the following video had the green bar at the top of the screen, indicating it was shared for his 'close friends.' It was not as wholesome as what was posted before.     
Instead of another cute snap of Auston and Mia having some sweet dad and daughter time, the video was of Auston standing in front of the full-length mirror that was hung on the wall near the condo's front door while holding your daughter. Mia was still leaning against his chest, but this time wide awake with her mouth open, curious about what was going on as she looked up at her dad while he chuckled and zoomed in on the reflection until a filter made both of their faces look all wonky. 
That went on for three more slides, and you couldn't help but feel bad for Mia as she had to put up with Auston's antics. 
"Please, at least he looks like he's having fun," Steph insisted as the story disappeared, and you brought your phone close again. "Mia seems pretty content too."
"He's turning my daughter into a meme, Steph."
"Like you're any better! Weren't you the one that was curious about how well trying to get Mia to ride on Frank's back when she's older would go over?"
"It was a joke!" You exclaimed and looked at her with wide eyes. "Now, please don't repeat that. Auston doesn't need any more ideas."
Steph just laughed again.
"You can't tell me you haven't thought about putting a Snapchat or Instagram filter on her."
"Whatever," you grumbled before looking away and smiling at the waitress as she set your food down. "Leave it to you to call me out on stuff like that even when I'm not the one doing it."
"Oh, you know I'm teasing," she replied with a smile and shook her head. 
"I know, I'm just giving you a hard time."
"Yeah, yeah, that, and you just really miss them, don't you?" Steph asked, watching as you nodded.
"I do," you told her honestly. "I haven't been away from Mia at all since she was born, right, and I don't know. I feel like I've become as reliant on her as she has on me and it's not that I'm worried something bad is going to happen when she's with Auston, he is so, so great with her, I'm just worried she's going to need me and I won't be there. I'd feel like a terrible mother. But I guess me leaving her alone with her dad was bound to happen at some point, right?"
"Yes, it was, but Y/N quit being so hard on yourself," your best friend said firmly. "You are an amazing mother, and no one thinks otherwise. You're also still very new to this whole parenting thing, so is Auston, but even with how hard I can imagine it must be with him not being there all the time, I still think the two of you are doing a damn good job. Mia is lucky to have such great parents, oh, and Frank too. Can't forget about your firstborn."
"Never," you laughed, before smiling at her thankfully. "Man, you really know how to not let me get stuck in my thoughts and sass me when I need it."
"You do the same for me, hun," Steph smiled back. "It's what friends are for."
"Very true, but do know that I appreciate it. Auston and I wouldn't be able to do as well as we are if we didn't have our friends like you and Mitch, or our families keeping us sane. So, thank you." 
"Stop, I haven't been on the brink of tears like this since I first met Mia," she whined, but you knew she meant it lovingly. "Now I'm feeling all mushy."
"You and me both," you told her then glanced down at your food. "Steph, would you be mad if I headed home after this? I really do miss my family, and I know it hasn't been that long but-."
"You don't need to justify yourself, babe, of course, I'm not going to be mad."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," she stated. "Mitch is going to bring Zeus down here when he comes to pick me up, and we're going to take him for a walk, it's been a while since he's roamed downtown streets. Would you mind if we stopped by to visit Mia for a little bit before going home too?"
"I wouldn't mind at all."
~*~
Back at the condo, Auston was having an interesting time. 
He would've been lying if he said he wasn't a little bit nervous about being left alone with his daughter for the first time, and the moment you walked out the door, that feeling escalated. But, he refused to let you know that he was stressed because he didn't want to ruin your day. So, he sucked it up and mentally prepared himself for what was to come. 
The first hour or so was easy enough. Mia was fast asleep lying on Auston's chest as he was stretched across the couch, thinking of how he had everything under control and nothing to worry about. He even, after a lot of consideration, decided to post a picture of his sleeping baby on Instagram, followed by another video just as she was waking up. 
But what wasn't shown in that video, was the panic he felt. 
It wasn't the first time he had dealt with a fussy Mia just after she woke up, and surely wouldn't be the last, but he couldn't keep himself from thinking of how sometimes she would simply just want her mom. 
At just a month old, you were convinced Mia was a true daddy's girl with how cuddly and content she became whenever Auston held her, but there were still times that even he wasn't enough for her to relax after getting worked up. It was clear that Mia found comfort in both of her parents, but there was the odd time she would need you to cuddle or hum her back to sleep regardless of how hard Auston tried. He was afraid then was going to be one of those times. 
Although Mia loved being around Auston, which he knew, he couldn't get over how easily you were able to soothe her. It was like you had a magic touch or something, and he didn't know how well Mia would take to you not being there once she woke up. 
However, it ended up not being as bad as he was expecting.  
Once Mia woke up, she was rather fussy, and Auston could feel himself gradually getting more anxious because of it. She didn't want her bottle, didn't need a diaper change; nothing seemed to be going right. In a spur of the moment, with not being sure what else to do, he lifted her up from where she was laying and held her close. He supported her head as she leaned against his shoulder and started swaying them back and forth, whispering soothing words of how much he loved her and how everything was going to be ok. 
She eventually stopped wailing but was still crying, and Auston felt terrible. Even Frank stayed nearby, keeping close tabs on what was going on, but still, nothing worked. Auston was on the verge of calling you, or even his mother, by that point, even though he didn't want to, but then he remembered something. Music. 
He remembered you telling him on multiple Facetime calls while he was away playing hockey how if Mia woke up unhappy and just wouldn't stop crying, you would sing to her or just put on music, and she would eventually calm down. Auston had seen it for himself a few times, too and cursed himself for not thinking of it earlier. 
Without a second thought, he grabbed a remote off the coffee table and turned on the stereo. Edwin McCain's I'll Be started softly playing from the speakers, and Mia almost instantly reacted. Her cries turned into sniffles and eventually faded into complete silence as Auston rubbed soft circles on her back and hummed along to the tune. She became so quiet that by the end of the song, Auston was positive she had fallen back asleep, but when he looked down at her, she looked up to him with wide eyes and let out a happy squeal. 
It took a lot in Auston to not melt right then and there over how much he loved his daughter. He was so glad she was content with him and decided to keep the music on as he continued swaying and singing while Champagne Supernova by Oasis began playing next. It was a dramatic performance, that's for sure, but Mia seemingly loved it for she didn't get upset again and just stared up at her dad in awe for the entire seven and a half minutes of the song. 
After that, Auston kept the stereo on as he continued holding Mia and moved into the kitchen so he could grab something to eat. Once he was done, he went back to the living room and set Mia on her blanket next to Frank while trying to figure out what to do next. He was about to put on Netflix when his phone sounded with a new notification from Snapchat. It ended up being a video from his sister Breyana zooming in on his older sister Alex as she sat across the room. Once Alex looked directly at the camera, a filter that made her eyes and mouth become huge became visible, and then the video ended with a high pitched version of Bre's laugh sounding from behind the phone. 
Shaking his head and chuckling at the two, Auston then opened the camera part of his Snapchat to send back a video of himself with the same filter. Once he started recording, he was about to say something but then decided against it as he swapped the camera to show Mia laying on her blanket, but now with the filter on her face as Auston continued zooming in. Without even watching the video, he saved it and sent it back to Bre before sitting on the floor next to Mia and showing her one of her stuffed animals. 
A few minutes later, he got a text.
Bre
Please tell me you kept that video, I can't stop laughing.
Surely it wasn't that funny, Auston thought, but when he unlocked his phone again and actually watched the video, he too couldn't stop laughing and decided to take more videos and pictures just like it. He was quick to discover which filters he liked best and some of the clips were just too good that he couldn't not share it with anyone else, so he posted them to his close friends Instagram story for others to enjoy as well. 
Auston was well aware that you would see the things he posted too, and couldn't help but laugh as he imagined what you'd say about them once you were home.
Mia eventually grew hungry, so Auston gave her some of her bottle before they mindlessly wandered back to the living room and attempted to kill time.
After another hour of him just laying on the ground next to his daughter, making random noises and expressions went by, Auston eventually grew bored and decided that he, Mia and Frank deserved some fresh air and wanted to go for a walk. He still hadn't heard from you, so he assumed that Steph somehow managed to get you to keep your cool while you were out and figured you'd still be gone for a little while longer. He didn't bother texting you to let you know they were going out, just got himself and Mia all bundled up to face Toronto's cold, February air and went on his way. 
The nice thing about winter in Toronto was that a lot of clothing was needed. If you weren't bundled up, you'd feel like you were freezing, and it always gave Auston an excuse to look unrecognizable as he roamed the streets. It was great.
This time was no exception, either. Auston put on his winter coat, boots, hat, and a scarf covering most of his face before looking down at Mia, who was almost unrecognizable. She was snuggled in her stroller, wearing a very warm and fuzzy onesie, and covered with multiple blankets because Auston would never forgive himself if she got cold. 
It was obvious she was content, though, because, after only about five minutes of being outside, she was starting to fall asleep again. 
The sun was beginning to set as a soft coat of snow fell from the sky. Although it was cold, it was nice, and Auston was glad he decided to leave the condo rather than staying cooped up in it for the entire day. Frank seemed thankful too as he tried to bite at the falling snowflakes as the three of them walked down the street. 
They soon came to one of the nearby off-leash dog parks, and Auston decided to let Frank roam around in the fenced area for a little bit. Once he let the Goldendoodle off his leash, Auston looked down to see Mia wide awake again and looking up at him. She wasn't fussing again, which Auston was thankful for, but she was moving lots and making noises, so he took that as her wanting to be held.
By the way, she cuddled up against him, it was apparent that's exactly what she wanted, and he couldn't help but smile because of it. He held her close as he glanced around to locate Frank, who was on the other side of the park playing with a chocolate lab, before reaching down to grab Mia's blanket so that he could bundle her up again. 
The next time Auston looked for Frank, he noticed a woman crouched down petting the pup. Her back was to him as she rubbed the back of Frank's ears and the chocolate lab from moments prior, walked around nearby; making sure to rub against the woman for some attention as well. He stepped closer to them, ready to call Frank back over so he wouldn't be a nuisance, but then the lab bolted towards him excitedly. 
"Woah, hey buddy," Auston said as he leaned down to pet the dog, being mindful of Mia in the process and then noticing the dog's name tag. "Zeus?"
By the way, the dog responded to his name, Auston immediately assumed this was the Zeus he thought it was and started looking around from Mitch. But then, someone spoke up from behind him.
"You know, if it wasn't for Mia's blanket, I don't think I would have recognized you," the voice said, making Auston turn around only to become face to face with you. "Well, Frank was a dead giveaway too, but you're really feeling the whole incognito thing today, huh?"
"Hey," was all he said as a smile grew across his lips. "What are you doing here? How was your day?"
"It was good," you told him. "Mitch picked Steph and me up with Zeus and were all going to come back to the condo, but decided to stop here first to let Zeusy run around a bit. I can honestly say I wasn't expecting Frank to run up to me out of nowhere."
"I'm not even surprised that he did to be honest.."
At that, you smiled.
"Me neither," you chuckled, as Auston wrapped his free arm around your waist and pulled you into his embrace. You accepted the gesture and melted into his touch a little bit before looking down at Mia. "How was today?"
"A lot smoother than I was expecting," he replied honestly. "Got a little worried at one point, but we managed."
"Good. I'm sad I wasn't needed, but I am also really glad things were ok."
"You're always needed and wanted, babe, you have no reason to think otherwise."
"I know," you responded and leaned against his shoulder as you looked down at your daughter asleep in her father's arms. "We're doing alright at this whole parenting thing, aren't we?"
"I'd say so," he said before pecking the top of your head. "It's a challenge, that's for sure, but I'm glad to be experiencing it with you."
If you weren't already feeling mushy from your talk with Steph earlier, you definitely were then. You really did love doing life with Auston and were about to remind him of that, but then a voice spoke up from nearby. 
"Is that my favourite Matthews?" Mitch asked as he and Step approached, Steph rolling her eyes at the comment. "Lemme see her."
"She's sleeping right now, but once we get back at the condo, she's all yours," you told him, knowing how much both he and Steph adored your daughter. 
"If you're careful," Steph stressed. "We don't need you almost dropping her again."
"That was one time!" Mitch argued, making you all laugh. 
"You're lucky you redeemed yourself," Auston teased before looking back at you. "What do you say we get Frank and Zeus and head back?"
"Sounds good to me," you replied, feeling all warm on the inside as you went on to spend the rest of the night with your little family and best friends.
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songsoomin · 5 years ago
Text
Let Me Down  Part 2 (A, S)
Synopsis: CollegeStudent!Mingi x CollegeStudent!Reader, Friend!Yunho. After you left Mingi due to his neglect of you, you’re both finding it tough to move on
Song inspiration: ‘Need You Now’ Lady A
Genre: Angst, smut and eventual fluff (but not yet)
Warnings: Drunk unprotected sex, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), mentions of using alcohol to cope with the pain, threat of sexual assault (by random character, of course not any of the boys), physical violence (towards same random character). 
Word count: 9K (sorry)
Posted: 27th June 2020
Part 1 Part 3
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It was the third time you'd heard the gentle knock on your bedroom door and for the third time you ignored it.
"Y/N...." Jina's worried voice filtered through, "...please come out and eat something."
You buried your head further under the covers.
"You haven't eaten properly in days. Not since -"
"Jina...let her be. She just needs some time." Suzy interjected before Jina could mention him. Both your roomates had been tip-toeing around what happened three days ago. The day you finally broke up with Mingi. They'd both been waiting for you to see sense and dump your selfish, unreliable boyfriend of five years but hadn't forseen the fallout from that decision. Now they were both worried for you.
When they came home from their lectures that day to find you lying on your bed, red-eyed from crying all afternoon. They had thought that as you were the one who broke it off, you'd cry it out and then get over it - after all, it wasn't like you were the one who'd been dumped...you'd chosen to end it. They had got it very wrong, though, because you still loved Mingi, despite leaving him and you felt like your world had caved in on you. You left him because you couldn't stand knowing he didn't love you the same way anymore, knowing you just weren't that important to him. You had to leave because you knew the way he was treating you was wrong. It didn't mean you didn't love him anymore, though, and right now you were starting to question whether this pain you were feeling was worse than the hurt you felt while you were with him.
"You did the right thing, Y/N." Suzy said with confidence later that evening when you had finally given in to Jina's worrying and come out to pick at some toast. "You can't allow yourself to be taken for granted like that."
"I know it hurts now but you'll start to feel better soon and one day you'll find someone who isn't too stupid to see how lucky he is to have you." You almost rolled your eyes at the cliched line coming out of your best friend's mouth but you didn't want to offend her; you knew she was trying her best to cheer you up.  
"It might not be too bad, Y/N..." Jina added, "At least you don't have any shared classes with him and there isn't long left before graduation anyway. You'll never have to see him again after that."
The feeling you got when Jina spoke of never seeing Mingi again was like being punched in the gut. You felt sick so you ditched your toast and made an excuse, trudging back to your room to lay on your bed, willing this feeling to go away.
By Monday you had come to the realisation that you couldn't stay in your room forever so when Suzy - the 'mother' of your trio - came in to ask if you were going to return to your classes, you surprised her by already being awake. It was wholly unlike you to be up and dressed early but you hadn't been sleeping properly for the last week anyway.
As the weeks went by you found that you could return to life as normal for the most part; you went to classes, your part-time job, even a few social gatherings and you seemed almost normal again but Jina and Suzy could see it. You weren't ok. You did a good enough job of pretending in order to get through the day but you weren't quite the same anymore. You also knew this but the only way you knew to manage was to ignore the pain; you buried it as far down as you could until it was just a dull ache in the background, a constant reminder that he didn't love you.
                                                   ********
Mingi POV
"So she finally dumped your sorry arse?" Hongjoong asked once Mingi told him why he was slumped on the couch staring blankly at the TV screen. To be honest he hadn't paid any attention to what was on and now he looked at it properly it appeared to be some kind of gardening programme - certainly not what he would normally watch and what must've caused his friends such confusion when they came back to the dorm Mingi shared with Yunho and Hongjoong.
"You did have it coming, though..." Yeosang said matter-of-factly, earning a glare from Mingi but he continued undisturbed, "I mean, did you think she would put up with being neglected forever? You barely made any time for her, at all."
Mingi contemplated that and realised he had never thought about it. It would be a lie to say he was unaware that he prioritised his friends over you but he just assumed you were ok and would always be there.
"You ok, bro?" Yunho asked, jolting Mingi out of his thoughts suddenly. The tall blonde, as his best friend, was more worried about how Mingi felt than the others were.
"I'm fine." Mingi said trying to sound a lot more happy than he felt. "In fact, I'm great. I can do whatever I want now, spend as much time with you guys as I like without being nagged about it. Now I can enjoy our last months at college before we have to join the real world."
Yunho looked at him as if he was crazy and maybe he was but if he kept telling himself that this was a good thing for him then maybe he would start to believe it and get rid of this painful aching in his chest.
"You know, you really didn't deserve her." Yunho muttered as he walked away.
It had been about two months since Mingi had really seen you - not that he hadn't looked but he seemed to only catch a glimpse of you as you crossed the campus grass or disappeared into one of the lecture halls. He thought he'd at least see you in the cafeteria or eating lunch with your friends on the grass as the weather was so nice now but he never did - it was almost like you had completely disappeared from his life. He hadn't spoken to his friends about you at all - still stuck in his delusion that if he pretended to be happy without you, he would be - but eventually he asked Yunho, who was on the same course as you, if you were still attending lessons.
"Yeah, of course she is." Yunho answered, not thinking much of it as he was distracted with the choice of pizza in front of him at the lunch counter.
"Do you talk to her much? Is she ok?" Mingi attempted to seem nonchalant but the questions caught Yunho's attention now that he'd settled on his usual pepperoni and a diet coke to wash it down with.
"Why?" He asked, raising an eyebrow in challenge. Mingi kept pretending he was having a great time single, going out to clubs, drinking, flirting with girls, but Yunho had been his best friend since they were five years old and he wasn't swallowing that crap. It didn't escape his attention that Mingi was drinking too much and, as much as he flirted, never accepted any of the girls' advances.
"No reason. I just hardly ever see her around - I just wondered." Mingi looked away fast, not wanting Yunho to see just how much he wanted to hear anything about you.
"Uh-huh, sure." Yunho shook his head at Mingi, "Just go try to win her back or something. The others might not notice but I know this is tearing you apart."
"Hey! She dumped me! If she loved me so much she wouldn't have left." As his voice faltered on those last words, Mingi couldn't help but let slip how he really felt. There was no point hiding it, anyway. Yunho already knew.
"You're so stupid, Mingi." Yunho replied, sighing because what he also knew was that you looked like shit all the time because you weren't sleeping or eating properly. He knew you were just as unhappy but Mingi was still just as self-absorbed, only thinking about how hard this was on him when really he should just take some fucking responsibility for how he treated you and realise it was all his own fault.
                                                      ********
In truth you very much had been avoiding any place you knew Mingi would be; you knew his schedule and his habits so you simply made sure you took a different route if your classes ended around the same time. You always went off campus for lunch, as well, somewhere you knew Mingi wouldn't go. Jina and Suzy were really supportive, they knew that it was still hard for you to see him and would do anything to help you through it. As time wore on you actually found that not seeing Mingi helped a lot and slowly you were starting to feel better. Your best friends were also delighted to see you starting to eat better, taking it as a sign you were getting over him. It didn't always work, you were bound to see him occasionally as you were at the same college. When you did see him, though, he would be laughing with his friends, looking so carefree. Sometimes you would see him talking to girls, though, and that same dull ache that never really went away clawed its way back to the surface.
"We're going out tonight!" Suzy announced as she breezed into the living room of your shared dorm.
"Who is?" You asked, confused.
"We are. The three of us." She threw you a look that dared you to say 'no' and carried on so you wouldn't have time to protest. "Lucas invited us to a bar with his friends tonight so I've decided to take you out to have some fun."
"Fun?" You weren't sure about Suzy's idea of fun; it usually involved a lot of drinking and dancing and, more often than not, making fools of yourselves.
"Yes. Fun. That thing you never have anymore. It's about time you got back out there instead of moping around this place. You might even meet someone nice - Lucas has a lot of hot friends, you know." She added with a cheeky wink. "So get in your room and get ready now. I want a hot-looking Y/N in one hour. Jina, that goes for you too!"
"Yes, ma'am!" Jina mock-saluted and headed towards her room, laughing.
You weren't opposed to going out; maybe it would help but you didn't care about meeting anyone. You knew very well how good-looking Lucas's friends were and you used to think Johnny might have a thing for you but you weren't there yet.
The bar itself was really nice and the music wasn't too noisy so you could still have a conversation without having to shout. It had an 80's vibe with coloured neon tube-lights and music of the era but didn't overdo it, still being able to pass for a normal bar rather than a themed one. As soon as you were there, Suzy made a beeline for Lucas and virtually leapt into his arms, kissing him passionately; given their size difference he easily caught and lifted her up when she jumped, wrapping her legs around his middle. They were a really cute couple, you thought; him tall and blonde and Suzy smaller with dyed red-hair. You and Jina followed along, greeting him once she'd let him go and getting introduced to any of his friends that you didn't know already.  
You were actually having a pretty good time, surprisingly, Lucas's friends were fun and made you feel welcome. Some of them might have been a bit too eager to make you - and Jina - feel welcome and you suspected it was to do with what you were wearing and you knew you looked good. Your blue dress wasn't too revealing but it clung in the right places and emphasised your curves and you'd completed the look with a pair of high heels. You may not have been interested in catching anyone's eye but you still liked to look nice because it always made you feel more confident. Jina, however, was loving all the attention she was getting from the boys and was flirting shamelessly, making you laugh to yourself - something you hadn't done much of in months. An hour or so in the drink caught was making it's way through you and you decided to head to the bathroom but, as you wound your way through the crowd of people, you heard something that made you stop in your tracks. You knew that familiar, deep voice all too well and it cut through you like a knife.
You looked to where the voice came from and saw Mingi sitting with some blonde girl on one side of a booth with Seonghwa and a brunette on the other, looking very much like they were double-dating. Your heart twisted painfully as you watched the blonde girl very evidently flirting with him and taking every opportunity to stroke his arm or put her hand on his broad chest. As you stood there dumbstruck, Mingi looked around and you could see the shock cross his handsome face as he registered you standing there.
"Y/N." He called your name almost apologetically, like he'd been caught doing something but you weren't hanging around to find out what he had to say; you almost ran to the bathroom and flew into one of the stalls breathing hard. You sat there processing the situation - so what if he was on a date with some girl? He can do whatever he wants - he's a free man. It wasn't for you to care anymore, you said 'goodbye' to him. You can't afford to care now, you'd come so far trying to move on. Like this you reasoned yourself into a kind of calm and made your way back to your friends, taking a route in which you wouldn't walk past him again. It must have been a little obvious that you weren't quite ok as Johnny seemed to notice but then he had been paying you a fair bit of attention tonight.
"Are you ok? You look a little pale."
"Yeah, I'm fine..." you lied as best you could, "Just need another drink is all."
"Comin' right up!" Johnny smiled and ordered you another Purple Rain cocktail while you forced yourself to look happy and normal. You drank the drink pretty quickly and ordered another, hoping the alcohol might ease the ache in your chest that had now returned with a vengeance.
                                                     ********
Mingi POV
"Mingi....Mingi!"
"Oh.. uh.... what?"
"Dammit, Mingi, I've been talking to you for the last five minutes - why are you never with it anymore?" Hongjoong asked, exasperated with his roomate's behaviour.
Yeosang snorted, "We all know why he's never with it anymore."
"Shut up, Yeosang!" Mingi spat back at the smaller blonde man.
Hongjoong sighed and looked at Mingi with concern in his eyes, "Mingi, we're all worried about you. You don't sleep properly, you either mope around the dorm or you stay out partying all night long.....and we've all noticed how much you're drinking these days."
So what if he was? Mingi was tired of his friends' interfering. Why couldn't they just leave him alone?
"You know what you need?" Seonghwa added as he plopped down on to the couch next to Mingi, "You need a good fuck."
"Oh my God - that's your answer to everything, Hwa!" Hongjoong despaired, throwing his hands in the air at the oldest member of their friend group. "He needs to deal with his feelings, not hook up with random girls."
"No, it's exactly what he needs." Seonghwa turned his attention over to Mingi now, "Get back on the horse, bro; you haven't been with anyone since Y/N." The mere mention of your name caused Mingi's heart to clench and the pained look on his face didn't go unnoticed by his friends.
"Getting back out there and meeting girls is the best way to forget about her and move on." Except Mingi didn't want to forget about you.
"How on Earth would you know, Hwa?" Yeosang interrupted, laughing, "You've never had your heart broken. In fact, do you even have a heart to break?"
Yeosang laughed harder at the rude gesture Seonghwa threw his way as he replied, "You're just jealous I get laid so much more than you do, Sangie. It's the safest way - if you don't get attached, you can't get hurt."
"Hwa's right!" Mingi jumped up, surprising them all, "If that's what it takes to prove to you all that I'm fine and stop you nagging at me, I'll do it."
"Great! I'm seeing this new girl tonight so I'll ask her to bring a friend along for you." Seonghwa grabbed his phone and started texting, "Go get ready, Min."
A few hours later Mingi was seated in a booth next to some blonde girl he'd just met with Seonghwa and a brunutte opposite them. He had started to realise that Hwa was not right, after all. He didn't want to be here with this vapid girl that was meant to be his date and, to be honest, he'd already forgotten her name. The girls Seonghwa hung around with were all very pretty but he didn't look for much more than that - why would he when he never intended to get to know them? To him, the girls he dated were just for a fun night - maybe a few if he liked them enough - they never lasted long. Seonghwa was tall, dark haired and, arguably, the best looking of them all; his aura just seemed to attract girls without him even trying.
Mingi couldn't help but compare this girl to you; you were beautiful and intelligent. You could have fun together and proper conversations, you had a connection - this girl was so dull, just talking about celebrities and clothes...he really didn't know how Seonghwa could bear it just to get his dick sucked at the end of the night.
He really was trying his best to be friendly and polite but this stupid girl just kept pawing at him, laughing at anything he said as if it were the funniest thing she'd ever heard. He downed his third drink and ordered another just to try to get through this ordeal.
As he was getting through the fourth drink, Mingi felt eyes on him, turning around he saw you standing there looking back at him and the girl. You looked so beautiful to him, in the blue dress he used to love on you the most but he couldn't look away from your face and the look of utter hurt in your eyes.
"Y/N..." He called out, throwing the girl's arm off himself, but to no avail. You darted towards the bathroom and away from him.
"Is that girl someone you know?" The blonde asked him with almost a jealous tone to her voice.
"Just...stop talking." He ground out, annoyed at her very presence, and stalked off towards the bar, downing his drink as he went.
Once there Mingi ordered another drink and two shots; he didn't want to feel what he was feeling and alcohol had become the only thing that came close to helping. Why did he feel like he'd been caught cheating on you? It was you who left him! He laughed bitterly at himself for ever thinking that if he just pretended to be fine, he eventually would be. It had been months now and the hole in his heart was still just as raw.  
"Min..." Seonghwa appeared beside him, "What are you doing?"
"Hwa, I know you're trying to help but I can't do this." Mingi said, downing the shots one after the other as  Seonghwa stood there, eyebrows raised in concern.
"You're going to have to move on at some point, Min... It looks like Y/N is." Seonghwa said gently, tilting his head in your direction.
Mingi looked to where  his friend nodded and felt anger rise up in his chest as he watched you take a purple cocktail from Johnny, laughing at something he'd just said. He couldn't stand this; just the thought of Johnny - anyone - taking his place at your side, holding you, kissing you, touching you..... No! He wouldn't even think of it. He couldn't bear to. Mingi downed his last drink and marched towards the door, leaving his friend just staring after him.
Next morning, Mingi woke up feeling sick, not knowing if it were more from the alcohol or the memories of seeing you looking happy and carefree with Johnny. As far as he could see, you didn't look close enough to be an item but who knows? The thought of you with another man still filled him with anger but you weren't his anymore. He had to get used to that.
He texted Seonghwa to apologise for running out so suddenly.
It's ok, bro, I understand why you didn't want to be there anymore. Came the reply, followed quickly by,
Oh.. and don't worry, I made sure your date had a good time ; )
Mingi laughed to himself, thankful for Hwa's easygoing nature.
                                                     ********
You sat with Suzy and Lucas at the breakfast table next morning, Lucas had stayed over and made pancakes for the three of you and you sat eating and chatting about the night before.
"Jina really went home with Jaehyun?" You asked wide-eyed. You'd thought she was sleeping in and that was why you hadn't seen her yet this morning.
"Yeah," Suzy giggled, "...She's had her eye on him for some time; I guess she must've felt brave enough to make a move last night."
"Wow, good for her, I guess." You said forking another bit of maple syrup covered pancake into your mouth.
"Jaehyun's a nice guy," Lucas added, "he'll be good to her."
You sat quietly as Suzy and her boyfriend talked together about the events of last night. The ever-present dull ache throbbed as your mind replayed the image of Mingi with the blonde girl's hands all over him. He wasn't yours anymore, you told yourself, he could see anyone he wanted to.
Your only concern now had to be trying to get through your exams and graduate and you couldn't afford to be distracted by anything else if you were going to do that. You finished up your pancake and cleared your plate into the sink, thanking Lucas for making it as you went.
"What are your plans today, Y/N?" Suzy asked.
"Oh, I think I'll just study; I'm still a little behind on my coursework and I'll have no hope of graduating if I don't get this done."
"Ok...work hard!" Suzy chirped as you wandered back into your bedroom.
You'd done it. You'd got through your exams and were graduating. It had been really hard and you'd had to keep forcing yourself to concentrate on your studies because Mingi was never far from your thoughts. It was easier being without him now than it was in those first months but the dull ache never entirely went away - always reminding you of it's presence if ever you caught a glimpse of him around campus. Jina and Suzy had done their best to pull you through it but you found yourself having to accept the reality that the pain would now always be a part of you. You ached for Mingi, to be back in his arms, but you knew he wasn't right for you. He didn't feel the same.
The actual day of graduation passed by in a blur - the calling of names and collecting of certificates had been terribly boring but you'd daydreamed your way through most of it, having to be nudged by Jina when you missed your name being called. Your parents had come along and taken you out to dinner - just like everyone else's parents so the restaurants were packed. Despite trying your best not to think about Mingi over the last few months you had decided to talk to Yunho about him briefly during class.
"Yunho?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you think you could do me a big favour?" You ventured nervously. You were close to Yunho from sharing classes with him all throughout college but he was still Mingi's best friend so you weren't sure how this would go down with him.
"Uhh...sure. Well...depends what it is." He laughed, flashing his blindingly bright smile at you. You'd always thought he was kind of cute but now his dyed blonde hair started to grow out and his natural black peeked through he was even more good-looking.
"Could you try to find out where Mingi and his parents are planning to go for his graduation meal?" Yunho looked a little surprised so you tried to explain your request. "It's just that...I don't want to run into him because I know it will be awkward. Our parents will probably start to chat because they used to be friends when we were dating and I don't think I could deal with that."
A look of sympathy crossed Yunho's face and he reached out from his seat next to you and rubbed his had up and down your back in a reassuring manner. "Sure, Y/N. I'll do my best."
Yunho had come through so you were able to relax at dinner, knowing you wouldn't have to deal with the unwanted situation.
Although the dinner was nice and it was lovely to see your parents after a long time, you were more excited about the bigger celebration tomorrow; it was generally tradition for the graduates to go to out clubbing the day after (given that the parents wanted to celebrate on the day itself) but the next night you could really unwind and enjoy yourselves. You were a bit sad because the end of college meant your best friends would be moving on with their lives but you were trying to see it as an opportunity yourself - you felt like this city was your home so you wouldn't physically be moving but, metaphorically, you could move on from this last painful period of your life.
The next morning you saw your parents and wished them a good journey home; they had moved since you started college so they were further away than they used to be and didn't want to make the drive home late at night. They stayed in a hotel overnight and you met them for breakfast before seeing them off but once they were gone you started to get excited about the evening to come. You, Jina and Suzy had made reservations at a salon to have manicures and pedicures, and get your make up done; partly because you wanted a treat but also to spend the day being pampered with your two best friends before you wouldn't have them in your life so much anymore. You also went to get your hair done - nothing drastic, just a trim and professional blow dry - you wanted to look great tonight and you'd never felt you were any good at doing your own hair. A new dress and heels and you were ready.
The chosen club was the favourite one for the students to visit, it played the best music and didn't charge a fortune for drinks - best of all though, it had a 2-for-1 offer on cocktails and shots, knowing all the students would flock there for their post-graduation celebration. As you walked in you felt amazing, your dress was a black, sparkly material, fitted in all the right places and shorter than you normally went for. You matched it with strappy, black stilettos with a glitter heel and subtle silver jewellery. It wasn't just your look that made you feel amazing, you just felt better than you had in a long time; maybe it was optimism for a fresh start.
As the night wore on, the drinks kept flowing and you were well on your way to being drunk and having a great time with your own group of revellers. You, Jina and Suzy were there with Lucas and his usual friends but he'd also brought along some others from his course who you'd never met before. You'd normally be shy around new people and keep to yourself but the alcohol and excited atmosphere made you braver and you were all happily dancing together. There was one guy in particular who seemed to have taken a liking to you and was dancing very close, trying to grind on you; you were happy to dance with him but politely tried to keep a distance between you. After a while he was getting a bit too handsy so you excused yourself to go get a water from the bar. It was there that you spotted the one person you had hoped not to see and he was heading in your direction right now. As he approached you noticed he had cut his black hair slightly shorter than before and had a fringe. A lot of students chose to dye their hair bright colours but you loved Mingi's naturally black hair - with that and his beautiful dark eyes and plump pink lips, you'd always thought he looked stunning.  Just to make it harder for you he had worn a dark blue shirt with the first two buttons undone so you could see the thin silver chain he wore draped across his well defined collarbones and it made your heart beat a little faster.
"Y/N, can we talk?"
You looked up at Mingi, wishing all the feelings you had been trying to supress for the last few months weren't trying to claw their way to the surface.
"I don't think that's a good idea." You said, looking away from him, still waiting for your turn to get served.
"Oh, but dancing provocatively with your arse in some dude's crotch is a good idea to you?"
You snapped your head up and stared at him in shock. Was he really doing this?
"What has it got to do with you if I do, Mingi?" You were starting to get angry, he can't just decide to start caring now after taking you for granted for so long.
"Maybe I just don't like seeing some other guy with his hands all over my girlfriend." He said, raising his already naturally loud voice a little, making the few people in earshot look round curiously.  
"Except I'm not your girlfriend, am I?" You spat at him and the look of hurt that flashed over his features sent a pain through your heart - or was it really the fact that you weren't his that was hurting you?.
"Y/N...please." He looked like a hurt puppy and your resolve wavered - only for a moment, though, because you remembered the blonde at the bar and anger rose up in your chest again.
"You think can go out and date random girls with Seonghwa but get to tell me who I can and can't dance with?"
"What? That stupid girl from the bar? I just went on that date to stop Hwa bugging me about it and I left just after I saw you there. I never wanted her - I only want you!" The look Mingi gave you was so earnest you wanted to believe him but the truth was he had hurt you so much.
The bartender came then to take your order. You should've just asked for the water you came for but the dull ache you had come to live with was turning into a sharp, tearing pain again.
"Two shots of tequila, please." Mingi waited silently beside you while you got your drinks and paid. When you were done he grabbed your arm, trying to stop you from leaving.
"Y/N... Please give me another chance." He looked so broken but you couldn't go back to him, back to being neglected and ignored.
You downed both shots and put the glasses back on the bar. Steeling yourself against the pained look he was giving you, you turned and looked up into the face of the man you knew, deep down, you still loved but were still too angry at.
"No, Mingi. I can't."
You walked back to the dance floor, knowing full well what you were doing was petty, and started dancing with that same guy whose name you didn't even know. This time you did dance provocatively and you let him grind against you. You knew Mingi was watching you, you could see him looking over at you while he drank with his seven friends. It was a bad idea, you knew that but you wanted Mingi to know that he didn't own you. You were his once but he ruined it.
You were having a lot of fun but eventually you started to feel the alcohol catching up to you as your movements became less co-ordinated. It was pretty late anyway so you told Suzy and Jina you were calling it a night.
"Do you want us to come with you?" Jina asked but you knew they were still a long way off from being done.
"I'll be fine; there are still lots of people on the streets and I won't go through any secluded areas." You promised.
Hugs were exchanged and you stumbled you way through the mass of clubbers to get to the door. Outside you stopped a little way from the club and enjoyed the feeling of the cool night air on your hot skin.
"Hey." You turned in the direction of the male voice to find the guy you had been dancing with had followed you out of the club.
"Oh. Hi." You said uneasily, hoping he didn't want what you thought he might.
"So I thought we could go back to my place and have a little more fun, yeah?" He took a few steps closer to you with a look in his eyes that made you uncomfortable.
"I'd really rather go home alone, thank you." You said as confidently as you could despite feeling anxious, hoping he would accept your refusal and leave you alone.  
He closed the distance running his hand down your arm and closing his hand around your wrist. "You see...I don't really think it's fair for you to tease me all night like that and then not give me a little something." You swallowed nervously, looking around and trying to think of how to get out of this awful situation.
"Don't you agree?" He added a little menacingly, leaning in closer to you.
The male tightened his grip on your wrist and started to pull you in the direction of a nearby side street; it was dark with no one down there and panic started to rise up in your chest, causing it to tighten horribly.
If you were able to think rationally you would have screamed to alert the other people on the streets that something was wrong but the fear had gripped you and all you could manage was a futile attempt at breaking free of this man's hold. He wasn't huge but you were still small compared to him, in height and build and his grip was firm.
As he pulled you, stumbling because of your stilettos and the alcohol, into the side street you managed to find your voice and, as loudly as you could muster with the fear still constricting your throat, you tried to shout, "Let me go! I don't want this!"
The man didn't listen to you, he simply stopped some way down the dark street and pushed your back up against the wall, holding you in place.
"Get your hands off her NOW!" His voice was low and full of anger but it was so beautiful to you in this moment.
"Get lost. She's mine tonight." The man said not even looking in the direction of the intruder but still looking directly at you with a nasty smile on his face.
All of a sudden he was yanked back away from you; he still had one of his hands on your wrist and pulled you over as he flew back.
"Are you ok?" Mingi asked, scanning your face. His voice held none of the anger it had a moment ago as he spoke gently to you. You let Mingi pull you up and steady you on your feet, feeling just a slight pain in your knee as it had been grazed by the fall.
"What's your problem, dude? I'm just trying to have a little fun."
The anger flashed over Mingi's face again as he straightened up and turned to the man and before you knew it he punched him hard in the face, the man stumbling and falling to the ground. Mingi turned back to you and gently said, "Let's go." and you could see he was doing his very best to hold in his fury. It already made him angry to think of another man touching you but to do so without your consent - and to hurt you, as well - took him beyond angry.
"She's just a tease anyway. If she's gonna act like a whore, she'll get treated like one." The man angrily called out after your retreating backs but Mingi couldn't let that pass, he wanted this scum to be sorry he ever touched you. He let you go and strode back to the man who was still sitting on the pavement, he grabbed his collar roughly in his left hand and started raining punches down on him. You stumbled your way over the uneven paving stones to try to calm him before he did any real damage but Mingi was in a rage; the man now lying on the ground having his face pounded by both of Mingi's large fists as he straddled his body.
"Mingi, please!" You cried out, worried someone would see this. The man was scum and didn't deserve any better given what he would've done to you but you didn't want Mingi getting into trouble because of his temper.
"MINGI, STOP!" He finally stopped, breathing hard and looked down at the bloody man under him. He was nowhere near calm but he let you lead him away.
You walked mostly silent back to your dorm, holding Mingi's arm for support with just the occasional query from him as to how you felt and if you were hurt, to which you tried to reassure him that you were fine now and it was just a graze. At your dorm you invited Mingi inside, partly because you didn't want him going off still so angry and partly to clean him up - his knuckles were cut and bloody and, at some point, the man must've got at least one punch in as you could see a fresh cut on Mingi's lip.
You sat Mingi on the couch as you prepared some water, cotton wool and antiseptic spray to treat his wounds. As he sat there with his head in his hands you could see the amount of anger still bubbling inside him.
"Mingi, I'm ok. Really." You said gently, startling him as he hadn't heard your approach.
"I'm not." He said simply. "I wanted to kill that guy for what he was trying to do to you."
Not knowing what to say to that you simply took one of Mingi's big hands in yours and started to clean the blood off his knuckles before gently drying them and spraying a little antiseptic over the cut skin. You laughed lightly when he hissed at the sting of it.
"So you can take the pain of repeatedly punching a man in the face until your knuckles bleed but you can't deal with a little stinging?"
Mingi smiled but it didn't reach his eyes, "You've calmed me down a bit now. The anger overtook me so much back there, I guess I didn't feel the pain."
You didn't reply, just moved quietly on to his other hand, cleaning it as he sat on the couch with his eyes closed and his head laid back. You smiled to yourself when he fussed about the antiseptic again.
Mingi looked up when you gently started to dab at the cut on his lip with wet cotton wool. While you were concentrating on cleaning off the blood, you could see that Mingi was staring intently at your face. A couple of times you looked up at him from you position next to him - kneeling on the couch but sitting back on your feet - and each time your eyes met you could see something blazing in his beautiful, dark eyes. It was definitely affection but you didn't know if it was love; that was something you had been sure he didn't have for you anymore. You looked closer at Mingi, looked into those intense, dark eyes that you loved so much and thought that maybe he did still love you.
Although, you knew it was a bad idea, you slowly leaned up and gently kissed the corner of his lip where he was cut. "Thank you for saving me." you added softly.
Mingi looked at you for a few seconds before grabbing your face with his large hands and pulling you in for a kiss; asking for entry with his tongue as he licked across your bottom lip. You knew it was wrong but you gave in and melted into it, kissing him back eagerly. You'd never been able to let go of your feelings for Mingi, even though you'd tried to bury them and, in your still slightly drunken state you didn't have the strength to deny him.
Mingi placed his hands firmly around your waist and pulled you onto his lap so you were straddling him, your short, black dress riding further up so the only barrier between you and the growing bulge in his trousers was your delicate underwear. He left your lips and kissed along your jawline, moving to your neck, pulling a gasp from you as he sucked hard against your soft skin. You couldn't help yourself and started grinding your core against him, feeling the bulge grow harder still underneath you. Mingi grabbed a hold of your dress and pulled it over your head in one fluid motion, almost growling as he took in the sight of you in your matching black lace bra and brazillian panties.
"I've missed you so much, Y/N. You have no idea how much I want you right now." His rough voice was deeper than you'd ever heard it and it sent shivers down your spine, the excitement making your core clench instinctively and wetness start to pool. As you moaned his name, Mingi unclasped your bra and tossed it to the floor, immediately latching his mouth onto one of your hard nipples while his large hand caressed the other breast before pulling harshly at your delicate nub with his thumb and forefinger. You let out a loud moan and ground down harder against his clothed erection wanting to feel more friction on your heated core and Mingi, knowing what you wanted so well by now, lifted you slightly and slipped his hand under the waistband of your panties and entered your warm, wet hole with his long fingers, reaching deeper than you ever could yourself.
The only thing you could hear was your own moans of pleasure and the wet sound of Mingi's fingers fucking in and out of you harshly. Suddenly Mingi lifted you into his strong arms and carried you into your bedroom, while you kissed down his neck, taking in the familiar scent of his cologne. He laid you on the bed and slid your panties off you, groaning as he took in the sight of your bare, wet pussy. Mingi crawled between you legs, firmly grabbing one in each hand and spread them further apart. Slowly he placed wet kisses along your inner thighs but gradually something more animalistic came over him and he started to mark you, biting and sucking hard and making bruises start to appear almost instantly. He ran his mouth all the way up from your soft inner thighs to the delicate skin between your thighs and your aching pussy and, finally, pulling you closer to him roughly he marked his way over your hips. He was like an animal that had fought and won for his mate and you loved that he was now marking you as his own before he took you as his own, too.
Marking complete, Mingi dove between your legs and licked all the way up your smooth, wet folds. You moaned out loud in pleasure as he finally slipped his tongue between them and straight into your tight hole, lapping up your juices and moaning against you.
"You taste so sweet, Baby. You don't know how badly I've wanted this." The vibration of his deep voice quickly drove you to the edge and when Mingi moved his mouth up to suck hard on your swollen clit you thought you were going to explode right then. Mingi shoved two of his long fingers back inside your entrance, which was now soaking with both your own wetness and his saliva, curling them up to hit your sweet spot and you couldn't contain it any longer. Intense pleasure flooded over you as Mingi continued to suck and lick sloppily at your clit while pumping his long fingers into you at a maddening pace, forcing your release to continue on for longer and longer. As you finally started to come down from the high, your body shuddered at the overwhelming sensitivity and you had to gently push Mingi's head away from your abused clit.
"Did you enjoy that, Angel?" He growled out lowly, "I've missed having my tongue inside you so much."
"But I'll bet you've missed my tongue on your cock so much more." You teased, blinking up at him through your lashes. Mingi always loved when you looked innocent but said the dirtiest things. He quickly undressed, stripping everything off entirely and you felt a thrill of excitement as you took in the sight of his hard dick standing against his lower stomach, pre-cum glistening on the tip.
"Let me take care of you, Mingi." You purred as you took his hands and pulled him down to lay on your bed. You crawled between his legs and gave him a long, sultry look as you lowered your head and kissed his wet tip. Mingi groaned at the sight of his pre-cum staining your lips and grabbed the back of your head, pulling it down, desperate to feel those soft lips around his cock. You happily obliged, wrapping your wet lips around the head and licking at the sensitive spot just under the rim. You felt his dick twitch in response but pulled away, only to lick all the way up the underside and finish with a flick against the rim again.  
"Oh God...please!" Mingi was never good at being teased, always desperate to be inside you already so you gave him exactly what he wanted and, in one smooth motion, took his entire length in your mouth.
"Oh...fuck!" Mingi's cries of pleasure filled the air as you bobbed your head up and down, dragging your mouth almost all the way up to the tip only to slide right back down until he was hitting the back of your throat.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" The sounds of you gagging on his cock were the most beautiful to Mingi and you knew how much he loved it so you deep-throated him as best you could, which wasn't easy given how big he was. You pulled away for air when you felt him start to twitch more, knowing he was close and you crawled up to straddle him, rubbing your bare heat against his throbbing member.
"Mingi, I want you inside me." You whispered in his ear as you bit on his earlobe then moved down to bite and suck on his neck, leaving marks of your own.
He groaned in frustration, "Baby, I don't have any protection on me. I didn't expect this to happen."
You didn't have anything either, having not been with anyone since him but drunken desire took over you, drowning out the tiny sober voice in the back of your head which told you this was an incredibly stupid idea.
"Mingi! I need you. Please fuck me."
Being somewhat impaired himself, Mingi didn't have the willpower to resist, he flipped you over and held himself above you with one hand beside your head and the other stroking his hard dick. He positioned himself at your entrance and stroked his tip up and down your wet slit to lubricate himself before slowly sliding in to you. The feeling of sheer pleasure overwhelmed you as you felt his thick cock stretching your walls to accommodate it and you clenched around him instinctively.
"Shit...I forgot how tight you are." He breathed out as he pushed all the way in as far as he could.
"And I forgot... aaahhh...how big and thick you are...." you cried out as Mingi hit your G-spot perfectly. He had always been big - and perhaps it was just because you'd missed him being inside you so much - but right now he felt huge and you wondered how on Earth he was fitting in your tight little hole.
Mingi leaned down and kissed you deeply, never stopping his hard, deep thrusts. His soft lips moved down to your neck leaving wet kisses down your hot skin until he reached your collarbone and resumed marking you.
"God, I love your tight cunt." He growled out between kisses as he continued to thrust hard and fast. The feeling of Mingi's big, hard cock sliding in and out of your aching core was more than you could bear and the intensity of it overtook all your senses until you couldn't feel anything else but him.
"This sweet little cunt belongs to me." He said as he continued to fuck you roughly. "Tell me you haven't let anyone else touch you. Tell me you're still mine." Mingi's voice was a mix of possessive and desperate as he begged you for reassurance.
"Mingi..." you panted out as he continued to rock his hips against yours, "There was never anyone else but you."
"Tell me you're mine." He demanded, his deep, powerful voice forcing you into submission.
"I'm yours, Mingi. I'm all yours." A tiny part of you knew this was all a bad idea but it felt so right. Mingi being inside you made you feel complete and, for once, you couldn't feel that dull ache in your chest anymore.
Mingi could feel you clenching around him and, knowing you were getting close again, he reached down between your boddies and began to circle your still very sensitive clit while whispering praises to you.
"That's it, beautiful girl, cum for me again." He let out a deep groan as he felt your walls convulse around him and your warm, wetness release all over his thick cock.
Chasing his own high, Mingi lifted your legs to rest over his shoulders so he could reach deeper inside you and his thrusts got harder but sloppier as he came ever closer to orgasm.
"Baby, you feel like Heaven...I wanna fill you up so badly." He was so close now and you desperately wanted him do it.
"Mingi, cum for me. Fill me up. Make me yours, Mingi." It was all he needed to hear and with a couple more thrusts he released deep inside you, filling you up with his hot, thick cum.
Mingi remained inside you as you both breathed heavily, coming down from your highs, before pulling out and laying beside you on the bed. He pulled you into his arms and, as you were succumbing to sleep, you could hear him murmuring,
"You're mine, Angel. You'll always be mine."
                                                    ********
As you woke to the sun's rays filtering through your window, you had a mixture of thoughts running through your mind as the memories of last night came flooding back. Mingi was laying next to you, still with an arm wrapped around you and he roused as he felt you moving to sit up.
"Good morning, Baby."
You smiled at him but it didn't reach your eyes. You were so confused; what happened last night had felt so right but now you were entirely sober and could think about it clearly, you were scared. Mingi had hurt you before and it had taken so much to get over it that you were scared to let it happen again.
"Y/N, what's up?" He could see by your expression that something was wrong but didn't know where your thoughts were taking you.
"Mingi...What happened last night. It shouldn't have."
"What are you talking about?" He asked, confused.
"We can't be together. You hurt me before, I can't go back to that - I can't go through that again."
"Baby, you're mine." He said desperately, "You said you were mine." In his eyes you could see tears forming, shaking your resolve. You couldn't bear to see him like that so you looked down at your hands which were in your lap, playing with your fingers anxiously.
"I can't be yours anymore, Mingi. Last night...we were both drunk." You said it gently, willing him to understand.
"I may have been a little drunk but I know it wasn't a mistake. I love you, Y/N."
"I'm sorry, Mingi. Please...just go." The words sounded wrong in your ears but you were so scared of being hurt again.
"Don't do this to me again. I can't be without you, Baby." His deep voice sounded so desperate but you couldn't look at him, couldn't afford to let him change your mind.
"I'm so sorry." Despite the tears falling, the finality in your tone told him that you meant it. You felt the bed move as he got up and heard the rustle of his clothes as he picked them up and silently dressed. You held in your sobs until you had heard the front door close, knowing if he heard how broken you were he would come back. Once you were all alone you let all the pain debilitate you and sobbed into the pillow which smelled so much of the man you still loved.
                                                      ********
Mingi POV
Hongjoong and Yunho looked up as their other roomate walked in the door looking disheveled.
"Hey! Where did you go last night? You suddenly disappeared." The shorter of the two asked.
They watched as Mingi silently walked to the kitchen side and picked up the half-drunk bottle of bourbon sitting there. Unscrewing the cap and tossing it onto the side, he took a long swig. He hissed slightly as the alcohol stung the cut on his lip, causing some of the brown liquid to drip down onto his shirt.
As your ex-boyfriend walked towards his room, the bourbon bottle gripped tight in his hand, his two best friends really took in the state of him - cuts all over his knuckles, a cut on his lip which was starting to bruise.
"Mingi, what the hell happened to you?" Yunho called out, alarmed.
"Just....leave me alone."
157 notes · View notes
ashesgraves · 4 years ago
Text
An Orcs Promise
The choice part 2
Your choice: Ellera
Warnings: little angst, some swears, family meetings, suggestive words.
Link to other parts:
An Orcs promise: https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646150675798032384/an-orcs-promise
Part 2. https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646294553661423616/an-orcs-promise-part-2
Part 3. https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646373247166906368/an-orcs-promise-part-3
Part 4. https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646477938321244160/an-orcs-promise-part-4
Part 5. https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646486100736638976/an-orcs-promise-part-5
The chosen: Oridan https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646771371691622400/an-orcs-promise
The chosen: Killian https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/647330998732881920/an-orcs-promise
The chosen: All https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/647482818600009728/an-orcs-promise
Tumblr media
Taking a deep breath you picked up the vase and walked over to Ellera. Softly placing it in her hands, you took a step back a nervous smile on your face. You could see tears starting to build up in her closed eyes when she felt the vase in her hands. Peaking an eye open Ellera looked down at you with such love and joy. Her face displaying all her emotions. The boys opened their eyes with a bit of disappointment but also joy. They may not have won your heart but you’ll still be part of the family.
Two weeks had passed since you chose Ellera as your mate. They have been the best two weeks of your life so far. Your days filled with working in your shop and getting to come home to your almost finished cabin. She helped you finish your carving, got you some lumber, plotted out where the cabin was going to go and started building. You were honoured to have her help you build. Sure you didn’t get much done when working together because you two were usually too busy staring at the other work.
With you gone at your shop it was easier for Ellera to do and finish her work, she loved your company don’t get her wrong but you two could not work together. No work would get done and you’d only stare and compliment one another. So she took her chance whenever you were away to finish everything up. It worked out quite nicely as well. Once fully moved into your home you both took turns meeting each others family extended and all.
Of course yours and her parents already loved you both but, what would your grandparents say? What would her aunts and uncles say? Only one way to find out you supposed. Going to sleep that night felt impossible to you, you were so anxious at what your family would think of Ellera. You knew interspecies relationships were fine I mean look at your mother and father! But an orc? Maybe that one was uncalled for.
Waking the next morning your limbs tangled with Elleras, your head on her chest and one of her arms protectively holding you in place. Groaning softly as you tried to detangle yourself and pull away from her. “Ellera.. we need to get up and get ready.. we’re seeing my family” whining when she only pulled you back down farther and holding you with more force. Sighing softly to yourself. “ okay five more minutes...”
Five minutes turned into another two hours. Jolting awake you looked around panicked. Your family was going to be here any minute you needed to cook and clean and get ready. You didn’t have time.. wheres Ellera. Oh no.. had your family already shown up and kidnaped her thinking she was a terrible mate? Had they thought she did a few things before the wedding night? Oh no oh no oh no. Racing to get up and get ready you almost started crying when you heard knocks at your door. Calming yourself you go and get the door only to find Ellera with her arms filled with ingredients and freshly baked goods.
“Good morning little lamb I hope you slept okay.. I got some things so we can cook a good meal for your folks!” Your heart stopped. You were mad but also incredibly impressed taking a look around the cabin it was clean.. and looked good and smelt like freshly baked bread. Feeling tears in your eyes you hugged Ellera tightly. “L-Little lamb are you okay I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I know you couldn’t sleep the other night so I wanted you to sleep I cleaned and got things so you wouldn’t have to worry or stress yourself I’m so sorry my lamb. “ her voice was shaky as she spoke worried she had upset you.
Softly shaking your head no you hugged her tighter. Your voice muffled by her chest and clothing. “ I was worried about you gone when I got up.. I thought my family kidnapped you thinking you did something terrible with the house a mess and me not even awake. B-but you did all this.. “ you were so happy you couldn’t express it. Leaning up and kissing her cheek you smiled and took some of the baskets. “What are we making?” The rest of your morning was filled with cooking, baking and last final touches for getting ready.
Once they did show they loved Ellera she was sweet, kind, funny a good cook and handy woman. They knew she could take care of you and you could take care of her. It all went by so smoothly until Ellera had said it was time for you to meet her extended family. You had three days to prepare yourself. You had hoped you had more time until that came. Meeting your family take a few weeks meet hers and be done. Not meet the family then get ready to meet the other family.
You hated large crowds and gatherings you needed time to recover and recharge your social battery. But you think you might be able to manage with Ellera at your side and you couldn’t wait to see the boys again. Despite your choice you stayed good friends with them, hell they acted more like your bothers than anything else now. Spending the rest of the day cleaning and getting ready to pack and travel you were exhausted come bed time.
The next day was filled with more nerves and jitters as you put the final touches together on what you were taking for your trip. Ellera had practically disappeared this morning leaving you to the house by yourself maybe giving you some extra alone time. You appreciated it but also you didn’t, it gave you time to start over thinking things. Shaking your head you needed to keep packing. So wrapped up in your packing you hadn’t even noticed Ellera was home with two other sets of footsteps following her. “Little lamb in back!”
Perking your head up at the sound of her voice you wondered over to the front door to greet her only to be met with her bothers. “Oridan Killian!!! What are you guys doing here ??? How are you?” Your mood instantly changed and Ellera was quite pleased with herself there.
“Well our dear sister told us you were coming down to meet the family. A terrible idea if you ask us. They’re loud and annoying but that’s how orcs are anyways anyways. So she figured you’d be all nervous especially after your own family meeting so we came down to cheer you up! “ Oridan smiled brightly and hugged you at a crushing force. The type of hug you’ve come to expect from him while Killian patiently waited his turn. He gave you a much softer and gentler hug.
“It’s good to see you again.. ma and pa will be ecstatic to see you as well but be warned of our little cousins they tend to bite. “ Killian spoke with a laugh as he showed you some bite marks he got after babysitting the terrible twos. You felt so much better Ellera knew you too well you wished you could do something for her.
With the boys around the rest of the day flew by until it was time to leave. Meeting Elleras family. You’ve never been up to the stronghold before this would be a first and you were scared but you had a surprise up your sleeve. Maybe it could get you some extra brownie points. The trip was just as short as the day before with the boys present. Time flew when the three siblings were reunited it was a bit funny. They acted like typical siblings throwing insults and punches but yet they loved each other and were so close.
Arriving at the stronghold stopped your heart. Met at a gate by some rather large and terrifying looking orcs you felt yourself shrink into seat and scoot closer to Ellera who happily wrapped an arm around your waist. The place was filled with mostly orcs a few humans and fae sprinkled around here and there. Oh gods you were doing this. This was really happening. Okay you can do this. Pulling up to the Thundered house you could tell you were all the last to arrive. Reaching in one of your bags you pulled out a satchel gift giving was huge in orc culture so you had been making carvings for them you had no idea if you had enough or if they would even like them.
Walking into the home you felt so small. Everyone’s eyes were on you. You felt yourself freeze up and going to find Elleras hand but instead you found Mrs. Thundered a wide smile and open arms. Letting a small sigh of relief leave your lips you rushed over and tightly hugged her. She had always been like a second mother to you. So of course she received the first carving. A simple bear with two little Cubs you had a matching father bear with one cub, you didn’t have enough time to make one whole carving but you hoped it was enough.
Nodding her head in acceptance and appreciation Mrs. Thundered spoke that the party may continue. Females had much more power than the males did in this stronghold it was a matriarchal group so of course Mrs. Thundered had plenty of respect it also helped that her family was so large. Going about and meeting all of Elleras other family members you gave them all a small carving. Some broke into tears others hugged you and some just nodded paying not much mind to you. It had been such a long day you were ready to curl up in Elleras arms for the night.
“You did so good today my lamb. My folks are very impressed by you. Smart bringing gifts that got you off of a few lists. They didn’t like I moved away from the Stronghold but that’s a them problem. “ that explains why some of them didn’t want to speak with you.
“Thank you.. I wouldn’t have been able to do it without you or the boys. Here.. this is for you.” Pulling out the final carving it was of you and her made with such detail and care it made her smile so wide and her eyes shine. Taking it gracefully in her hands Ellera lead you upstairs to her room.
“I have a treat for you tonight my lamb~“ Her voice was low and sending shivers down your spine as she lead you to the bed. Pushing you down Ellera laughed a little as she flopped down beside you. “A full nights rest no interruptions no waking early and breakfast in bed” glancing over to your face she laughed more when she saw how red you were.
Embarrassed you smacked her arm and hid your face. “ you can’t speak like that and expect me not to think of other things!! That’s unfair you knew what you were doing! “ Pulling you into her arms Ellera smiled and kissed all over your face like she did when you chose her.
“Hush my lamb plenty of time for that after marriage. “ she spoke with a teasing tone. Holding you closer in her arms you were glad you chose her. Shaking your head as you drifted off into one of the best sleeps you’ve ever had.
You had made the right choice.
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prettyinlimegreenboots · 4 years ago
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“It’s supposed to snow today!
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Here’s a little present from me to you! So thankful you are all on this writing journey with me! 
December 1
“It’s supposed to snow today!” Race exclaimed as he bounced on the bed, successfully waking Spot up. 
Throwing the blanket off his head, Spot cracked an eye open at Race. “And?”
“I’m just telling you that it’s supposed to snow today.” Race settled against the headboard, stretching his legs out, ankles crossed, looking fondly at his husband. “What do you want to do?” 
Spot rolled over to his back, arm thrown over his eyes. “Considering I was asleep five minutes ago, I haven’t really thought about it. But I’m guessing you have?” 
“I’m thinking firstly we should make some breakfast. Then we can spend the day in the park with the dogs and tonight we can do a family drive to look at Christmas lights.” Race shrugged his shoulders. “But detours can happen if we want them to. Just a rough outline.” 
Freeing his arms from the comforter, Spot held them open so Race could snuggle into them. “Come cuddle with me before we have to face the world. What time is it anyways?” 
Snuggling into Spot’s embrace, Race sighed. “Uhhhh  . . . . you don’t want to know?” 
Lifting his head, Spot caught a glance at the time and groaned. “Why am I awake at 7:30 in the morning, Racetrack?” 
“At least I didn’t wake you up at 5:30 when I initially got up.” Race looked up at him sheepishly before catching Spot’s lips in a good morning kiss. “Besides, I had to share my excitement with someone.” 
Spot gave him a look, sighing. “You could’ve shared it with Bales and Baxter.” 
Bailey or Bales was an Australian Shepherd, their first fur child. She was a little over 3 years and Race and Spot’s baby girl. Baxter, is a 14 month old Dalmatian is a hyper little thing but gets along great with Bales. 
“I did, I told them with all the excitement that snow was coming.” Race’s eyes went wide as he told Spot his story. “But they just rolled over and went back to sleep. They’re just like their dad, less than enthused.” 
Spot pressed a kiss to Race’s head, sighing. “I’m sorry I’m not very enthusiastic but in my defense I’m still half asleep. But I swear I’m excited for the day ahead of us.” 
Race hummed, putting his head on Spot’s shoulder, relaxing as he listened to Spot’s heartbeat. Silence hung in the air as the two relaxed, the warmth of each other comfortable.  
Several hours had passed before they pulled themselves out of bed, getting dressed, opting to get breakfast out of the house due to lateness of the morning. Leashing up the dogs, they grabbed their coats and headed out into the streets of NYC. Spot laced his fingers with Race’s as they walked along the busy street. 
Tugging him to a stop, Race pointed to a cafe to the left of them. Spot nodded, handing him the leashes. “What do you want?” 
“Coffee and a pastry - surprise me.” Race gave him a look, accepting the leashes, watching him disappear inside the cafe. 
Leaning against the brick building, he looked at the dogs before pulling out his cell phone. He flipped through his social media channels, smiling at a picture Jack had posted of his daughter, twirling like her uncle Race. Double tapping he liked it before posting a comment “good twirls ballerina.” 
Locking his phone, he slipped it back into his back pocket as Spot swept out the door, holding two cups and a bag. Race took the top mug that has his name scrawled against the side before taking a sip, sighing in contentment. “How about we find a bench and eat the goodies?” 
Spot nodded, leading the way as Race juggled the cup and the two dogs as they found a bench in the dog park. Unleashing Bales and Baxter, Spot and Race watched as they ran around the enclosed space. Handing over a pastry to Race, Spot relaxed against the bench, eating his own. 
They were both in their own worlds as they finished their pastries before Race turned and grinned at Spot. “How has your week been? You got home later than normal last night.” 
“It’s been busy.” Spot sighed, taking a sip of his drink. “The weekend couldn’t have come soon enough and I’m thankful that it’s Christmas next week. It’ll be nice to have some time off to hang out with you.” 
Race nodded. “Anything in particular that’s pressing at work?” 
“Just some new cases coming up.” Spot shrugged. “You’d think with the holidays coming up that it’ll get quiet in the District Attorney’s office but the courts don’t close down due to the Christmas holiday.” 
Race chuckles. “Crime doesn’t stop, unfortunately.” 
“Job security, I guess.” Spot chuckled. “How was your week?” 
Race sighed, throwing his head back onto the back of the bench. “I thought it would calm down with the dance recital last weekend but we had Holiday parties this week so it was just mayhem. I’m glad that the last dance classes were yesterday and I’m free until the beginning of January.” 
“What are you going to do with your time?” Spot sipped, pulling a ball out of his pocket for Baxter as Bales came and laid beside Race. 
Throwing the ball, he smiled watching Baxter chase the ball, bringing it back to Spot. “Honestly, I have no plans, maybe trying to sleep in a couple of days. Thank goodness we finished all the Christmas shopping last weekend so we’re all set there. I just have to wrap everything.” 
The game of fetch continued as Baxter retrieved the ball Spot kept throwing for him. A soft smile crossed Race’s face as he watched Spot talk with Baxter. “Shall we continue on our journey?” 
Gathering up their trash, they headed out of the dog park and continued walking uptown. They were bumping against one another as they encountered more people in a hurry to get wherever they needed to get to. “Why do people wait until the Saturday before Christmas to do all their shopping?” 
“Because they’re too busy doing who knows what. It’s not like Christmas is a constantly changing day every year.” Spot shrugged. “Do you have a destination in mind?” 
“Just wandering . . . unless you have a place in mind?” Race looked over at him, grimacing as a lady slammed into his shoulder. 
Spot grimace at the painful look on Race’s face. “Let’s head to the park - get out of the mayhem.” 
Steering them towards one of the many parks in the city, Race laced his fingers with Spot’s just as light snow began to fall. “There’s something magical about this time of year in the city.”
“You say that almost every year.” Spot squeezed Race’s hand, grinning. “But you’re right. There’s so much cheer and happiness. Not to mention the falling snow. It turns the city into a magic wonderland.” 
Race chuckled. “Yous a sap, Spottie. But I promise, I’ll never reveal that side of you.” 
“I’m only a sap because I married one.” Spot raised an eyebrow. “You know, you’re the one that curls up on the couch just to watch all those Hallmark movies.” 
His eyes went wide. “Last time I watched one, if I remember correctly, you were the one that was heavily vested in the lives of Olivia and Jeremy. You wanted to see what happened to them, even though you correctly predicted them falling in love and saving the Christmas pageant.” 
“True. But I only watch them because you cuddle with me.” Spot gave him a look with a silly grin before leaning forward and capturing his lips in a kiss. “I will always watch them with you, simply because that’s when you’re the most cuddly.” 
Race laughed, kissing him once more. “Sounds like a plan.” 
They continued walking with no real destination in mind, hand in hand, as the snow fell around them. Race looked over at Spot with a grin. He was happiest he had been in a long time and it was all due to the man standing to his left. Squeezing Spot’s hand, Spot looked over at him, concerned by the weird look on his face. “What’s wrong?” 
“For the first time in a long time, nothing. Just thankful that we’re married and I found my soulmate.” Race shrugged, grinning. “I just really, really love you, Sean.” 
Spot smiled, stopping in the middle of the path, pulling Race into his arms as the dogs wrapped their leashes around their legs. “Well it’s a good thing that I really, really love you, Anthony.”
Hope you enjoyed that! Feedback would be fantastic!  Thank you @wide-eyed--wonderer for sending that in! 
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missypawz · 4 years ago
Text
You
this is a request from! @lightoftwowings <3 I hope you like it 💕🤗 I restarted this a few times, but I think this one is the best 😊 Also I feel like this is a lot less creepy than it should have been and I can always do a more creepy one if you want.
It wasn't often that somebody sparked Levi's attention, but a certain woman had certainly done it this time, her name was Petra Ral, he had found out from the name badge that was pinned to her blouse, most likely given to her from where she worked, which was a cafe just down the street from the busy library in the centre of the city. He hadn't been there, but was planning on trying it one day, he wanted to try as many different teas from different shops and cafes as he could.
He wasn't sure if he could possibly explain everything that attracted him towards her, and he certainly didn't believe in love at first sight, no, it was always stupid to him, it didn't make sense, but slowly he was starting to understand, and maybe the people who always went on about it weren't just idiots, perhaps it really did exist, somewhere..but he didn't want to keep thinking of all that sappy shit, he wasn't trying to turn soft.
Whenever he saw her his eyes would travel over to her before he pulled them away to continue wiping down the shelves or reorganising books that people had managed to stick on the wrong shelves, sure it was his job to fix this, but it really bothered him how people couldn't just find the right place to put things, it wasn't difficult to do these small things.
Sometimes Petra would walk past him, flashing him a warm smile as he guessed she did with most, but still, he never knew what to do back, so just went with a nod of acknowledgement, a few times she asked him where a certain book was that she had been looking for and he was quick to help her out. Spending so much time at the library working there, you began remembering where quite a few books and where certain genres were.
One day after he finished work he'd noticed her walking down the street, it was wrong in so many ways, yet he still began following her down the same street. He pulled his scarf further up and shoved his hands into his pockets, trying to warm them up a little as he walked.
He wasn't sure what the force was, it felt as if he was being pulled towards her, it was also rather strong, he tried to ignore it and just continued to walk down the street. The wind blew making his hair fly everywhere, giving him more of a 'wild' look, his coat flapped too and he attempted to hold it down, trying to stop the cold getting to his somewhat heated body.
As Petra turned off the street he felt himslef stop completely in his tracks, everyone continued walking around him while he just stared foward. What was he even doing? Get yourself together Levi.
He didn't know what he was doing at all, why couldn't he stop doing these stupid and unruly things? Damn he was like a lost puppy following after her and it was downright creepy, he needed to stop, he knew, this would only hurt him more, going after her. One day she would stop visiting the library and they would never cross paths again, people seemed to always leave his life, from one reason to another, it was hard to let anyone else in so easily, or so he thought, here he was, trying to do it again.
He turned back towards the direction of his house and carried on walking, his head hanging slightly lower, it was better anyway, the wind wasn't hitting his face so much and making his eyes water.
As he made his trek back home he had her on his mind, and what he was going to do, he didn't know how to be romantic, he didn't know what things to say to get a woman interested in him, but being himself had to be the best option, he wasn't going to be someone he wasn't around her, he would just be himself and try to get to know her that way, he would stop stalking around her social media pages, he knew most of them, he'd found her off his friend Hange, he wasn't sure how she knew her but Hange knew a lot of people so it made sense. He needed a plan, and stalking wasn't going to get him anywhere.
...
The day had came very slowly for Levi, he had gotten back to his apartment and cooked some food for himself, then returned to his room to try and get some sleep. He had lay awake for quite some time, but eventually sleep came and he got a few hours, which was nice, not as long as most people got, but it would work for him, it was normal by now, his body had got used to working off little sleep.
He had pulled himself out of bed at the early hours of the morning and made his way into the bathroom, he turned the hot shower on and pulled his clothes off before stepping under the hot water, letting it just drip down his body, making him clean and fresh for the day ahead.
Once he was clean and ready for the day he'd got out and dried himself off, walking out the shower with a towel loosely hung around his waist. He'd began searching through his wardrobe and found his work uniform to put on.
His outfit was a white shirt and some black trousers, they were accompanied with some black shoes and a long, dark grey coat. Before levi left he finished off getting ready and made himself some toast to eat on the way to work. As he heard the wind smacking against the window panes he remembered to grab his scarf, it was red, he needed a little bit of colour to go with his black and white outfit.
He arrived at work around 10 minutes early, he hated being late and always got there a little early, it was nicer leaving the house before he needed to aswell, he didn't need to rush that way.
Before he managed to push open the large oak doors a figure appeared next to him, one that was around the same size as him, he supposed it was nothing, just someone trying to get into the library too, he thought this until he heard the persons sweet voice. "Hi." She moved herself closer to him and a smile was plastered onto her face, "I've seen you around, I saw you yesterday heading the same way as me..plus I always see you here, you're good at what you do." She spoke to him while they were just stood outside the door. "Hi - Yeah..I've had lots of practise with cleaning." He nodded to her, then actually pushed the door open, letting them both inside to the much warmer library.
"Well I always wanted to talk to you so..here I am! You should recommend me some books some time, I struggle picking them sometimes.." she rubbed the back of her head and walked along with him as he made his way over to the storage cupboard that held a number of things in that he needed to do his job. "I see, I have a few...if you wanted them."
"Of course, maybe later though? I shouldn't distract you from what you're doing, its very important everything's clean."
"I don't mi-" before he had any time to finish she already pushed her idea towards him."I'll meet you here later instead! When do you finish work?"
"Today its 3 PM."
"Sounds great..I'm glad I saw you."
"Yeah, me too, I see you most days."
"I'm here quite a lot, it's not surprising, If I'm not here I'm usually working at the cafe just down the street, it's a nice place with plenty of nice tea and coffee, plus pastries."
"It sounds nice." Levi was always a big fan of tea, he'd buy different kinds to try, he supposed he had a collection going, he did collected different tea leaves, he had quite a lot.
"It is very, I'll leave you to your job..and see you later if you're still up to it..?"
"Of course." He replied, maybe a little too quickly.
"Good! See you." And with that, she gave him a quick wave and left the library, leaving him standing still for a few seconds.
That worked out well, she basically did all of it, all he did was accept her offer, that was much better than what he had planned. While he began working and arranging things he was thinking about later on, he knew the hours would drag on until then, but he would get through it, and then who knows what would happen, he certainly didn't.
...
After what felt like days, his shift was nearly over, just 10 more minutes or so, he was just starting to pack some things away into the storage cupboard when he sensed a figure behind him. "Hi, I made it just in time right? How about those recommendations now?" He immediately noticed the voice as Petra, and turned himself round to face her. "Yeah, you're right on time."
"Good, come on, you said you had recommendations." In the middle of him packing things away she went to grab his arm, but then stopped, looking at him. "Go ahead." With that she linked her arm with his and she let him find some books for her, there were a few that he had taken home and actually enjoyed, these were the ones he gave to her, he only hoped he didn't have terrible choices in books.
The day progressed and Petra had taken her books out from the library that Levi had said were pretty good, now they were walking down the street and heading towards a restaurant that she said she liked, everything was happening quickly and Levi only nodded and followed her to the restaurant, just wanting to do whatever she wanted, he didn't really care what they did.
The meal was nice and they exchanged little bits of conversation over it, he got to know her a bit better than just what he'd found off her social media, and he'd told her a little bit about himself, he expected it to be scary and downright nerve wracking, but it was enjoyable, despite not knowing her very well he didn't seem to mind when they fell into silence, it was still nice.
They were currently in the middle of eating a desert, when he looked up from the ice cream sundae that he had, he saw the chocolate on Petra's lips and just shook his head, amused.
"What's that face for?" She continued eating her chocolate cake, he had to admit all the food was lovely in this restaurant.
"You've got a little here." He pointed to the spot, but on his own face.
"Do I? Oh - you've got a little ice cream there too." She wiped it off and Levi quickly did the same with one of the napkins, she smiled in response.
"Its gone." She confirmed, and soon enough they finished off, they'd both insisted on paying but instead went with splitting the bill which worked out well, they both gave a quick wave to the waitress that had served them, they'd also left a tip on there for her.
As they left their tables they headed back outside, the cold hitting them both once again. Levi had insisted that they could have a walk around the place and he could take her back to her house too, he felt it was only right. Petra wrapped her coat around herself and began walking next to Levi, in fact they took quite a long route, it was just an excuse to spend more time together, but it worked and they were both happy about it.
"Are you sure this is fine? your house is in the opposite direction right?" She asked questioningly, looking at him while she spoke. "It's fine." Was what she got in reply, she only nodded her head.
Petra's house was nice from what he saw on the outside, it had a few nice potted plants with bright flowers planted in them outside of the door, there was a little lawn that was edged off with a small fence too, and the house wasn't anything too large but it looked comfortable, like a place you would like to spend your time in, winter evenings, rainy days, all of them.
"I'd like to do this again, if you would like."
"I'd like to aswell." His reply was probably too quick again, but he wanted her to know that he really did want to see her again.
"Good, I'll text you." Reaching into her bag she took out a small note pad and a pen, before writing down her number, leaning against the outside window sill to try and make the writing look acceptable. When she was done she quickly handed it to him, letting him stuff the important note into his shirt pocket. "Thank you, it was fun..today." she made sure before she left, to give him a small kiss on the cheek and a thank you, for everything from the book recommendations, the enjoyable time and walking her back to her house.
Before replying he stopped, she'd just kissed his cheek, sure it was just a little form of affection, but it meant a lot. "Thanks, I'll see you again then." He watched as she waved and he forced himself to turn around to begin walking away, a feeling of pride and happiness actually welled up inside of him, a date, a damn date he'd been on, and he could not wait for more.
____________________________________________
I'm not sure.. I quite like this and might make a part 2, who knows, I hope you all liked it 💕
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dadzawa-adopt-dabi · 5 years ago
Text
Learn some dam self care Keigo.
Dabi has noticed Keigo getting tired.
"What's the matter? Don't they don't give you Heroes breaks?" He mocks to cover up the sliver of concern.
"Not me." Is the short and bitter response. Its genuine for once.
Dabi puts off the next meeting for a few days to try and give him a break. Spying and working double shifts nearly everyday is obviously leaving the Hero with little time to rest. He’s not worried, really he isn’t, but Keigo may have stumbled a few times last meeting. He caught himself and didn't appear drunk wich leaves exhaustion.
When he messages the hero again it's just to tell him the next meeting time and location. Hopefully the dumb bird has rested up and they can get back to exchanging information.
Dabi ends up running a little late again. Toga wouldn't leave him alone about meeting Hawks and he had to shake her loose before he came to see him.
Keigo is curled into the corner of a sofa and is folded into his wings when Dabi walks into the warehouse.
"No greeting birdy? And after i let you have time off" Dabi notices that Keigo actually dosnt look much better than he had a couple days ago. He makes a note to check social media and see if Hawks had been pulling double shifts the entire time.
"It's fucking cold. Let's just get on with this." Keigo grumbles from inside the cocoon of his wings. He sits himself up straighter but keeps his wings around himself as a makeshift blanket.
It's about 20 minutes into the conversation before Keigo stops talking midsentence. A few moments later he falls forward and Dabi rushes to catch him.
That's it. Its officially intervention time. Keigo is obviously being overworked. He had stopped talking at several points in the meeting, loosing his train of thought or dozing off before jolting himself awake. He's looked him up on his phone while Keigo was struggling to stay awake and Keigo hasn't had a night or day off in weeks. Its past a burnout pace.
So it's not a complete surprise when he finally gives up and falls asleep.
Dabi calls Kuroguri and tells him to pick him up and prepare for a guest as Keigo struggles to wake up again. Keigo is mumbling at him and trying to stand but stumbling, so Dabi walks him straight back into the opening warp gate.
"Your meeting the boss. Oh and I'm kidnapping you until further notice." Dabi casually states and follows after him to see Shigaraki steadying him on the otherside. He had on his gloves he usually used for gaming and was scowling at Dabi already. Kuroguri had warped them right into the living room.
This is going to cause shenanigans and Shig knows it.
"Is he drunk? He can't even stand. What are you doing bringing him here right now?" Shigaraki let Keigo go when he tried to jerk out of his hold.
"I- I'm too- I can't, Dabi?" Keigo mumbled and moves toward Dabi.
"It's fine Keigo. Shig is just concerned. It's fine he's got his gloves on." Dabi muttered to the tired bird and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Is he drunk or what?" Shigaraki hovered nearby.
"Remember how I was saying the Hero commission was pushing him too hard? He's not drunk, just sleep deprived and exhausted. So I kidnapped him"
Shigaraki scratched at his neck.
"Is he always like this? Is there anyone coming to look after him?"
"Not as far as I know. Hey Magne can you start a bath? He's pretty cold." Dabi started leading Keigo down the hallway.
Toga appeared at his elbow and got a good look at Keigo.
"He can use one of my bath bombs. He looks like he needs some self care."
" You can lecture him on self care when he wakes up later." He continued supporting Keigo and was guiding him down the hall to the bath.
" Can you make sure he stays upright in the bath?" Shigaraki asked Shuichi in the corner.
Shuichi hoped up passing his game to Shig to save for him.
"I can bath myself." Keigo insisted and pulled away from Dabi. Waking up a little bit more. He stumbled again and leaned against the wall.
"This really isn't necessary, I appreciate it, but this happens all the time."
Shuichi grabbed his hands and pulled him upright causing a glove to slip off.
"Shouldn't happen at all" muttered a concered Kuroguri from the kitchen as Shuichi made a choked sound.
Keigo snatched his glove back and shoved it on.
"Fuck that's gotta hurt dude, no need to hide those here. I've got mine long. No one cares if I cut them or not bro" Spinner spread his hands out to show Keigo the talons Magne and Toga had painted just a few days ago.
He took Keigo's other hand and tugged off the glove. Keigo's nails revealed as talons clipped short and frayed.
"Dabi can keep watch." Keigo muttered. If this was going to be how he met the rest of the LoV it was better the devil he knew with him while he was vunerable.
Dabi wheezed behind him and coughed to clear his chest.
"Not a good idea" he coughed out.
"No he can not. He would be useless" Shig said while trying not to laugh.
"The hell you all standing around talking for? Let's get bird boi bathed changed and in bed. Not Dabi's bed. They're still not at that point evidently" Magne stated.
"I'm not a child. And I have patrol in 3 hours. I can't just skip." Keigo followed anyways. Sleep sounded so nice and technically he was still spying while he was here.
"Stage one kidnapping and get Kuroguri on a soapbox for Hero treatment and schedules. Got it." Sako grinned.
"You better give me that soapbox. First Shouta now this young man. I've got quite a bit to say to society on how much they demand from heros." Kuroguri appeared to be writing a speech already.
"I'm here so how are you going to fake a kidnapping?" Keigo was really getting tempted by the idea of that rest. Why the hell was the LoV so nice? Maybe if he asked Dabi would dry his feathers off for him?
Too nice. All this sounded too good to be true.
"Magicians never reveal there secrets"
"Wouldnt you like to know feather boi?" Toga cackled as she reappeared with gold and pink bathbombs.
"Keep your secrets then. Also thank you Toga I've been wanting to try these." Fuck it Keigo decided. He was tired and could spy properly when he more rested. This was somehow nothing what he expected the LoV to be and everything Dabi had implied they were for him.
"We are talking about whatever the hell these guys think is going on when I wake up" Keigo took the bathbombs and followed after Shuichi. Only bumping into the wall a few times.
Keigo only nodded off in the bath once and Shuichi threw a rubber duck at him when he did.
"What else does the Hero concil have you hide?" Shuichi asked trying to keep Keigo talking and awake.
"Um I have a 3rd eyelid my visor obscures? My talons are actually my fault at this point. I have to regularly clean and straighten my feathers or use them all up. They are a lot of maintenance but most of its second nature at this point." Keigo stuttered in some parts.
"Eye markings?" That's something Shuichi was actually curious about.
"Not makeup. Most people just assume its eyeliner but I was born with them." Keigo finished rinsing out his hair and held out a hand for a towel.
"Cool. Dabi thought so but I totally thought it was eyeliner."
"How often does Dabi talk about me?" Keigo shrugged into some sweats and a shirt that had a deep v already cut for his wings. That was thoughtful.
"He talks about you a lot."
"Does he like me or something? Do you think he would mind helping me dry out my wings? I dont want to annoy him" Keigo went to leave.
"How are both of you this clueless? You are literally wearing his sweats. Yes he would help you with your wings. we all would if he would challenge us to a pvp for the honor." Shuichi facepalmed.
"They kinda suck though, and make people uncomfortable. My feathers are basically a bunch of knives. Maybe Toga wouldnt mind? She likes knives" He muttered and shuffled towards the room he came into. There had been a couch and he could always use his wings as a blanket. Wet or not he would pass out almost immediately.
"I've never seen Toga and Dabi fight yet and I am not eager to see it now." Shuichi nudged him towards a diffrent room.
"Your rooms over here."
"I have a room?" It was probably because he was so tired but Keigo started crying. They were so nice to him already.
"DABI, your bird is crying. Come fix him." Shuichi yelled towards the main room.
There was some cussing heard and a few seconds later Dabi was beside him.
"Why you crying pretty bird?"
"I'm mostly just tired but you guys have been so nice! I have a own room already and you kidnapped me and my shirt has holes cut and no one minds my talons." Keigo babbles and leans forward until his head is resting on Dabi's shoulder.
"Well yeah, as soon as I started talking about you seriously joining us Shig set you up a room. The sweats and sleep and acceptance is just basic decency. Let's get you in bed." Dabi led him in the rest of the way.
"Wait can you dry my wings? They're wet and gross and Spinner said you wouldn't mind? I promise they won't cut you." Keigo muttered. Dabi would probably say no but he was too tired to detach them all and spin them around until they dried.
"Sure. Go to sleep already birdy."
Keigo finally got to sleep knowing it would be for more than a couple hours. Dabi running his heated hands through his wings was definitely something he was going to ask for again.
Fuck the commission he was staying here. Maybe Toga could give him a face mask next time.
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saxxxology · 5 years ago
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What Goes Bump in the Night - 12
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PAIRING: Alpha!Sam x Omega!Reader WARNINGS: a/b/o dynamics, Victorian social dynamics, allusions to non-consent and dubious consent, dominance/submission, slow burn with eventual smut, suspense/horror/gore themes.
THIS WORK IS 18+ ONLY. DO NOT REPOST MY WORK ON ANY OTHER SITES.
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TWO YEARS LATER...
Yours and Sam’s relationship continues. The brothers work hard, sometimes leaving for weeks at a time as they go on hunting trips with their colleagues. Per Sam’s preferences, you spend your time reading and researching for them, which gives them considerably more time to focus on whatever case is at hand. 
On your second summer at the Winchester house, Sam takes you overseas to England for a much-deserved holiday. You spend the first day of the trip being sick in your private room onboard and finally venture out on the second to gaze out at the open sea. When you return, Sam promptly jumps back into the life, only giving you a couple of days to readjust to living at home before requesting your aid. 
One cold night in August, you’re woken by the sounds of an infant crying in the distance. Maternal instincts quickly take over, and you slip from the bed, runing from the room even as Sam warns you to stay back.
You follow the cries to the front door and let Sam work the heavy bolts back. It’s cold outside, and you shudder when a gust of cold wind washes over you. The cries are much louder now, and you peer through the darkness to see a basket on the stoop, piled high with blankets.
“What the hell?” Sam steps out and carefully picks the basket up, cradling it in his arms as he walks back inside and lets you close the door. Once you’ve thrown the bolts home, you’re at Sam’s side, eager to peer into its depths. 
There’s a pup nestled inside the blankets, wrapped snugly in a few thin layers that have done little to keep the chill out. The wailing hasn’t ceased, and Sam hears the sound of his brother’s bedroom door slamming shut. 
“What is that?” Dean asks loudly as he takes the steps two at a time. He’s upset at having been woken so late, and Sam places a hand on his chest, stopping him from coming closer. 
“It’s a baby,” you murmur, quickly unwrapping the blankets and checking the infant for injuries. He’s unharmed, if a little bit thin, and you swaddle him in one blanket and gently cradle him against your chest. He’s cold, his ears, nose, and fingers especially.
“There’s a note,” Sam says, pulling a thin piece of paper from the unraveled blankets. He skims over it, eyes narrowing before he starts to read aloud.
“Dear sirs, this is my son, Jack. He was born on May eighteenth, in the year of our Lord 1890. I am very sick and I am not strong enough to care for him. Your home is the only place I could think of where he would be truly safe for the time being. Sincerely yours, K. Kline.”
Sam sets the paper back inside the basket and peers down at the baby. His cries have petered out into soft, whimpering coos, and you’re carefully wiping the tears off his reddened cheeks.
“He’s still cold,” you murmur, “we need to feed him.”
“With what?” Dean asks gruffly. 
“We have milk in the pantry, correct?” You watch his nostrils flare and turn instead towards your Alpha. “Sam…”
With a grumble, Dean stalks away, heading back to his room. The sound of the door slamming again echoes all the way to the living room, and Sam lets out a deep sigh. 
“Sam,” you try again, “please?”
He swallows thickly and watches the baby root against your chest, searching for a nipple to latch onto. “Take him upstairs,” he says softly, “I’ll get the milk.”
You take the stairs carefully one at a time, trying not to jostle the baby too much. When you’re safely back in your bedroom, you slide back underneath the covers, slowly maneuvering Jack so that he’s cradled in one arm. You grip both of his hands in one of yours, trying to warm his chubby fingers. He’s barely three months old, and you have no idea how long he’d been out in the cold before his cries had finally woken you.
Sam comes back several minutes later, an old bottle half filled with warm milk in one hand. Jack’s begun to whimper again, his frustration evident as he tries in vain to search for food on a foreign body. 
“It’s from when Dean and I were little,” he murmurs when you give him an inquisitive look. “I sterilized it and the nipple’s a little stiff, but it should be okay for tonight.” He slips into bed beside you and watches you offer the bottle. Jack greedily accepts it, cooing lowly as the warm milk fills his belly. “I don’t understand why anyone would consider leaving their child with us,” he says. “We’re known through the city for being scientists who study inhuman things, not caregivers.”
“Maybe she knew I’d take it?” you supply. “At least he’s out of the cold. Any longer out there…” shaking your head, you lean down to nuzzle his soft blonde hair. 
“Where’s he going to sleep?” Sam asks. 
“Right here.” You pat the mattress next to you. “He can sleep between us, we’ll keep him nice and warm.”
Sam’s jaw tenses, but he gives in. He’s suppressed his Alpha instincts for a long time, especially with his denial of wanting children. Now, seeing you holding and nursing a baby sparks a warmth in his chest that he can’t stop from spreading. For a brief second, he wonders if this is how his father had felt when he’d seen Mary holding each of their newborn sons for the first time. 
“Just for tonight,” he says, trying to remain firm. The last thing either of you need is to bond with the infant, and as an Omega you’re already on your way there. “Tomorrow, we’ll have to let him sleep elsewhere.”
Satisfied, you allow Jack to finish the rest of his bottle and pat his back until he burps. You smile and nuzzle his cheek as you wipe the milky spittle from his chin, and Sam lets you tuck him in beside you before he turns out the light and lies down as well. One of Jack’s pudgy fists nudges his chest, and the baby gives a nervous whimper as he’s shrouded in darkness.
“There, now,” you coo before Sam can do anything. “It’s okay, Jack, you’re safe.”
It takes Sam a long time to fall asleep. When he does finally drift off, he’s torn between two final options. Convincing you to take Jack to an orphanage is going to be a long shot, and keeping him isn’t preferable either. Having a child in the house has never been a good idea, at least in his mind.
We’ll see what happens in the morning, he thinks to himself. 
***
You wake up to the sound of Jack’s mewling cries. Sam’s already out of bed and getting dressed, and he barely casts you an eye as you sit up, gathering the squirming baby to your chest to calm him.
“Good morning,” you offer him a small smile. “Did you sleep well?”
He grunts a reply and tucks his shirt into the waistband of his pants. “I’m going to make a run into town,” he says shortly. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“What for?” You ask, sliding out of bed with Jack still cradled in your arms. 
“We have nothing to care for a baby,” he says, “even if it’s temporary.”
He grabs his coat and gives you a short kiss before turning and leaving the room. He’s upset, and you can practically feel the tension mount when he leaves the room without fully closing the door. You wait for the creak and slam of the front door before looking down at the baby.
“You need a bath and a change, don’t you?” you coo, immediately overtaken by maternal instinct. “Come on, then, let’s give you a nice bath and then we’ll get you some breakfast.”
You’ve never bathed an infant before, but you slowly get the hang of it. It’s easier to simply draw a bath for yourself and bring Jack in, holding him firmly as you pour warm water over his body. He protests loudly when you wash his hair, and immediately calms when you allow him to float his body in the water, held up in your arms. His little arms and legs pump reflexively in the water, and you watch him play for a few minutes before getting out and carrying him into the bedroom. There aren’t any clothes for you to change him into, so you settle for swaddling him in one of the softer blankets he’d been delivered in and make a nest of four pillows to lay him in while he sleeps.
Dean’s in the kitchen making breakfast. He eyes you suspiciously as you walk in, but you pay him no mind. You learned to ignore Dean’s attitude a long time ago.
“Sam was upset,” he says gruffly. “Bringing that baby here was a bad idea.”
“Desperate mothers do desperate things,” you reply simply, gingerly dismantling the bottle and setting it in the sink. “She probably didn’t want her baby to get sick.”
“Could’ve just taken it to an orphanage, that’s what they’re there for.”
“And what would they do with him?” You rinse the inside and refuse to look at him as he butters a slice of toast. “They give children away to abusive parents or send them straight into the workforce.”
Dean grumbles around a mouthful of bread. “Just don’t keep it.”
“Don’t tell me what to do,” you snap back. “I understand that Sam is less than happy about having a child around, but he is my Alpha and I will discuss this with him as I see fit.”
Dean relents with a quiet growl. “Where is it, anyway?”
“Asleep in our bed upstairs,” you answer simply as you pour boiling water over the glass and set it on the rack to dry. “I bathed him and let him rest. I was just going to make him a little bit of milk for breakfast.”
You finish sterilizing the bottle and prepare another small serving of warm milk before heading upstairs. Jack’s awake and wiggling around in his blanket, and he immediately takes the rubber nipple in his gums. He finishes the bottle in only a few minutes, after which you burp him again and snuggle back underneath the covers. 
Sam returns after another hour. He’s carrying a burlap bag in one hand, and you cast him an anxious glance as he sets it on the foot of the bed. 
“Please don't be upset,” you beg quietly, “I know you don’t want children, but I want to have him a little while longer—”
“I’m not upset.” Sam heaves a sigh and glances at the tuft of blonde hair visible between your breasts. “I just… you know how I feel about wanting children.”
You watch him start to unpack his purchases and hesitate briefly before speaking. “You’ve never explained why.”
Sam freezes for a beat. His eyes close, and he turns slowly to sit on the edge of the bed. “You know that I wasn’t born out of my mother’s will,” he says, “I’ve always been afraid that if I create a child, I’ll become my father, or pass his… his afflictions onto them. I don’t have the time for them, anyway, or the patience.”
 “Jack isn’t yours,” you try to reason. 
“He’s barely been here twelve hours,” Sam says sharply. “I understand that children have been on your mind lately, but… Y/N, we can’t keep him.”
You clutch Jack tighter. “Just a little longer,” you whisper, “please, let me just… what if he goes to someone else and he gets hurt or grows up abused?”
“We’ll find him a place where that won’t happen.” 
You try to hide the tears in your eyes as you cast your gaze down at the sleeping baby. “I don’t want to let him go.”
Sam’s chest aches when he sees an errant tear stream down your cheek, and he reaches over to wipe it away. “Don’t cry,” he murmurs, “I know you want him, I really do, but we can’t.”
You pull your face away from his touch and turn away, slowly lying down on your side and tucking Jack in against you. Sam bites the inside of his cheek and stands up, slowly unpacking the rest of the supplies before muttering something about making something to eat, heading downstairs and leaving you alone.
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chrisevansgoodgirl · 5 years ago
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Can we talk about Carol and Steve punishing their sub? Because I love both my captains 😭
(Goodness! Sorry this took so long!)
Anyway. Let’s talk about this! Bc I feel like the styles are SO SO SO SO SO so fucking different.
Carol likes to punish you. She likes to grab you by the jaw when you’re talking back, she likes to pull your hair after you roll your eyes at her, she likes to grab you and pin you to the wall when you try to walk away from her. And she loves spanking you, edging you, and just not letting you come at all. Because she really likes when you’re whimpering and crying bc you need an orgasm while you’re laid out on top of her, head on her chest while she runs her fingers through your hair. And she really loves making you eat her out. For hours. She lets you on the bed so you’re comfortable but she really likes to ignore you while your mouth is between her legs. She’ll answer texts, sometimes calls. She’ll browse Netflix, sometimes even start a new show. She’ll read a book, a newspaper. And then you feel like you have something to prove—which is probably her goal.
Steve is soft. He doesn’t necessarily like it. He definitely doesn’t hate it, but he prefers to spoil you, not punish you. But when he knows he must, he will. Unlike Carol, he only ever punishes you on the bed. You’re not sure why, he’s just very strict about it. He won’t make you stand or bend you over a table, and it is NEVER in public—though, he does enjoy when Carol punishes you in a semi-public way. So, this bitch is a talker. Why am I punishing you? What lesson am I trying to teach you? Are you going to do it again? You always say no and he doesn’t communicate any disbelief even though you’re sure it’s there. Don’t you prefer being my good girl? And you claim yes, again, he accepts the answer. His preferred method is definitely spanking. Carol enjoys that from time to time, but’s definitely a Steve Punishment™️. He will have you count. Sometimes, he runs his fingers through your pussy and if you’re too wet, he makes you wait until you’re not. He loves how you end up absolutely needy and shaking, begging him to touch you—you don’t care how, you just need his hands on your body.
Where they have a common interest is overstimulation. Carol has tied you to the bed and left a vibrator on your clit for two hours before. You were a babbling, crying mess at the end, but the look of absolute adoration on her face and the way she held you afterward made up for most of it. She has you go to parties, meetings, other social events with too many people, where she has a smaller vibrator in your pussy and the means to control it with a handy app on her phone. Steve makes you sit on his face and won’t let you off until he is done. Super soldier. He’s never done. His favorite thing to do is make you talk. He has his hands on your hips and he lifts you just barely, starts using one hand’s fingers to press down on your clit or tease your entrance, and then says things like are you sorry for misbehaving? What do you think your punishment should be? Tell me how much you love me. Tell me how good I’m making you feel right now. You’re mostly incoherent, but he seems satiated by your responses most of the time.
The reasons for punishment are also so different. Most of the time. Carol reacts quickly so you talk back, you roll your eyes, you blatantly ignore her “advice”—see: orders—sometimes. She doesn’t do the talking like Steve. You know why she’s punishing you, she knows you know, and you both damn well know you’ll do it again whenever you please. With Steve, any of that behavior just gets you his disappointed eyebrows and then much later, you’re on the bed talking about it, waiting for him to pull you over his knee. You have never voiced it but you think he gets off on your nerves about it. He likes making you wait, keeping you guessing when, how many, how hard, will he fuck you after? Control. Freak. More often than not, Steve punishes you for “challenging” him in front of the team. You can’t do that, so he claims, because then everyone else will and then it’s not a team—you could recite this lecture in your sleep, you’ve gotten it enough.
These are the light punishments. Like that time you snuck out to a club with Wanda and then returned home with a black eye because long story short, some drunk loser got too handsy with Wanda and you started a fight with him and his friends. Or that time you consented to being bait for a mission and had to act without backup when the team couldn’t get there fast enough, no fault of their own; they just weren’t able to be close enough without being obvious. Or the time you had a drinking contest with Tony and won—which he argues about even though he called Pepper at 3 in the morning and begged her to take him back...they weren’t separated—and fell coming up the apartment stairs and sprained your wrist and bruised both shins. Neither Carol nor Steve were big drinkers and they constantly implored you to be responsible if you needed to do it. Or the time you helped Shuri, Peter, and Valkyrie prank the whole team. You weren’t allowed to retell the stories about Steve and Carol. Maybe it started with a p and ended in —regnancy. Regardless, the three of you decided to swap Thor’s cape out for a pink toned one that looked very much like the lesbian flag, which was totally not intentional... Tony was furious that the media reported Thor being the first avenger to make a political statement regarding sexuality. He was seriously planning a rainbow suit, and the rest of the team was no better, madness that Steve had to put an end to that he blamed you for completely.
But there are other, more serious times. Like when you make decisions during a mission that they are not on board with. And it doesn’t go as well as you would have hoped. Or that time, against Steve’s wishes, you were hanging out with a specific fantastic member of a certain team and there were paparazzi pictures the following day of when the tool kissed you out of nowhere—he swears he didn’t know you were with Steve and Carol, no one really believes him. Or when Carol told you not to go on that road trip with Nat and Bucky because, per Carol, despite them being master assassins, they had few people skills, absolutely no driving skills, and all three of you liked egging each other on way too much. Since Steve had been out of town, you were easily able to sneak out when Carol went to the gym. You guys were attacked, car destroyed, ended up hitch hiking to Montana, and had to call Steve and Carol to come get you.
When Carol is serious about punishment, it’s the craziest thing. She’s just at a complete loss. She’s not sure what to say or what to do, she is truly appalled and frustrated. This is when she leans on Steve a little—she sees him as the epitome of control and thinks he can offer it when she is feeling so out of control. All three of you end up on the bed, he sits against the headboard and holds you while Carol is sitting at the foot of the bed. Sometimes, she has you on your stomach, forearms locked tightly in Steve’s hands. This is when she spanks you. Sometimes, she has you on your back, Steve’s arms wrapped around your waist, and this is when she edges you until she’s satisfied. This is also when she talks. She wants you to show regret for upsetting her. She wants apologies and promises that it’s not going to happen again. But see, it’s not the same as when Steve talks bc Carol is going to do exactly what she wants and it doesn’t matter whether you tell her what she wants to hear or not. So, sometimes, you refuse to apologize, especially if it was a decision you stand by. These scenarios always end in a sort of compromise. It’s definitely not a win for either one of you and she’s okay with that. If anything, this is just to let you know that you scared her and if you would not scare her again, that would be great. Still, she has to send a message. You’re the only one naked, the only one vulnerable. Essentially, you’re the only one in the room without power and she likes to remind you in any way she can.
Steve. This is where things take a serious turn. He gags you. Because he doesn’t want to hear apologies, excuses, or arguments. Really, it’s almost dehumanizing when he punishes you this way, like you’re just an object for him to use however he wants. And it’s not like you can say no. Not that you’ve ever considered it, but there is this dark cloud over the whole room bc you have to wonder if he’ll know if you need him to stop. You hate that it actually gives you this tiny thrill. Carol watches. Steve demands it—but you wonder if it’s this mutual thing that they find in one another, maybe he’s feeling out of control and she’s the brakes then. He tells her what to do, too. He tells her when to undress, when to touch herself. The entire time, he’s fucking you furiously, yet acting like you’re not even there. He always starts you facing away from Carol. When he turns you toward her, you know he’s just about done with you. But when you lock eyes with her, when you know she’s looking at you, it’s harder not to come. You can’t warn Steve when you’re too close, you just have to hope that he’ll stop in time. For your sake alone, you assume—you’re not entirely sure what would happen if you finished without his permission. Not that you would ever tell him, but it scares the hell out of you to imagine. Afterwards, he’ll clean you up and tuck you in next to Carol. He usually goes to the gym to get rid of any remaining anger. You don’t tell him because you know it will make him feel guilty but you don’t fall asleep until he slides into bed and wraps an arm around you. You always take that to mean that he’s no longer mad at you. And every following morning, when he knows you’re awake, his fingers seek out your clit as some form of an apology for losing his temper with you.
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tarontherocketman · 5 years ago
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Mr Madden | Madderton Teacher AU | Chapter 5
The rest of the week passed by as slow as ever, students and teachers alike just waiting for the weekend, all anyone seemed to do was live for the weekend, it was the sad reality of society. Taron was quietly nervous about Monday arriving; the day that Ella is due to come back to school. He wasn’t sure what he will say to her, and was worried whatever he does say might upset her. Does he tell her it’s good to have her back? Or will that make her feel like she had been expected back sooner? Does he ask her how she is? What if she’s still not good and doesn’t know how to respond? Taron briefly confided in Rich about it, who put a supportive hand on his shoulder and assured him that whatever he says, he knows that he’ll say it in his usual kind voice and she won’t be offended.
Monday morning rolled around, the beginning of Rich’s third week as a teacher. He rolled out of bed and pulled the curtains open, thinking about how fast the past 3 weeks have gone, and how much has happened. Not even a month in and he’s already in a relationship with another teacher. Certainly not what he expected out of the job but he couldn’t complain, he loved Taron so dearly already. Rich and Taron had agreed over the weekend that as of Monday they would car share to get to work, Rich would drive them for a week, then Taron the next week, Rich again the week after, alternating each week to save fuel. A plan that essentially shouldn’t raise any suspicion from Mrs Reynolds, seeing as the school- much like most schools- were constantly trying to promote car sharing as an environmentally friendly scheme. Rich sorted himself out, trying to erase the typical morning elements of his appearance such as fixing his hair, washing his face, brushing his teeth. Once he felt put together enough, he threw his clothes on, straightened his tie one last time in the mirror, and headed out to pick Taron up.
“Morning Mr Egerton,” he smiled at the tired looking man slumping down into the passenger seat of his car.
“Mr Madden,” Taron nodded once, reaching down the side of his seat to pull the lever that made the seat recline back, closing his eyes and sinking further into the seat. Rich stared at him with a sad smile.
“You were awake last night worrying about Ella coming back weren’t you?” he sighed.
“Maybe,” Taron muttered, eyes still closed.
“Oh Taron..” Rich mumbled as he put the car in gear and set off to work, putting his free hand on Taron’s knee.
“It’s fine, it’ll be fine,” Taron assured himself.
“It will, you know it,” Rich agreed.
The pair arrived at work and found a parking spot quickly. Rich pulled into the space, put the handbrake on, and leaned over to give Taron one last hug before the day started. Taron reciprocated, wrapping his arms around Rich and resting his head on his shoulder, now finally opening his eyes after spending the journey half asleep.
“Shit!” Taron exclaimed, pulling away from Rich quickly and sitting forward in his seat.
“Wha-“ Rich started, whipping around to see what Taron was looking at, to be greeted by Mrs Reynolds sat in the car next to them, having obviously parked there and decided to sit for a bit before work.
“Of all the spaces I could have parked in,” Rich groaned in frustration, turning back round to Taron to pretend that she wasn’t there, staring suspiciously at the two men. Their fear had finally began to catch up on them, Rich had warned Taron about this from the start yet they both got careless and had possibly been caught.
“What do we do?” Taron bit his lip. 
“We wait until she goes in, then we go in straight to my classroom, no staff room,” Rich decided, Taron nodded in agreement, not daring to moan to Rich about how much he needed a coffee. The two sat in the car, tension coating the air as they wait for Mrs Reynolds to finally go inside. After what felt like hours, she gets out of her car and begins to saunter towards the school entrance. Rich and Taron got out of either side of the car and began walking quickly to the building and entering through the large main entrance, as they turned the corner to the hallway containing the door to Rich’s classroom they were greeted by a sour faced Mrs Reynolds casually standing outside of his door, clearly waiting for confrontation. Rich and Taron groaned quietly in sync.
“What was that all about in the car?” she asked straight to the point, not sparing an ounce of sensitivity.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Taron said bluntly, walking straight past her and into the classroom, Rich trailing behind. Mrs Reynolds followed them nimbly in before the door could fully shut.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” she griped, sounding genuinely annoyed.
“We weren’t doing anything wrong,” Rich stated calmly, trying to act busy by gathering his resources for the day and straightening all the desks.
“Something’s going on here, I can tell,” she jeered, trying to get them to confess to something, anything.
“We’re colleagues and friends,” Rich said bluntly, beginning to get annoyed, “now if you’ll excuse me I have to get ready for my class.”
“What’s he doing here then?” she pointed at Taron rudely.
“Again, friend and colleague,” Rich seethed, trying to keep his cool.
“I’m your colleague,” Mrs Reynolds pointed out.
“Yes but not a friend, goodbye,” Rich retorted, opening the door for her as a signal that she needs to leave.
“I’m onto you both, I will find out what’s going on,” she sneered, now walking out of the classroom.
“Yeah you do that,” Rich said as he watched her walk down the corridor and disappear round the corner. He stepped back into the room, attempting to slam the door but looking sheepish as the slow close mechanism foiled his plan. Taron, stood against the whiteboard with folded arms, smirking at his boyfriend’s error.
“It’s not funny, T,” Rich sighed.
“You’re a fiery one when you need to be my love.”
Rich looked unimpressed. 
“...sorry,” Taron apologised, his instinct telling him to give Rich a hug, but his brain telling him he can’t do that right now.
“She’s right,” Rich started, “she is onto us!”
“Shh, look it’s fine love, she doesn’t have shit on us yet okay?” Taron assured Rich, who was now pacing his classroom nervously, a habit that had become rather frequent.
“You’re pacing,” Taron observed.
“I know,” Rich snapped, suddenly stopping himself from pacing. “Sorry.”
“It’s alright, I know this isn’t a great situation but we’ll figure it out, she doesn’t have anything on us yet and she never will because we’re not going to do anything like we did in the car again, intimacy will only be at one of our houses,” Taron explained, trying to reassure his worried boyfriend.
“I know, I know, we just shouldn’t have to hide who we are..”
“No, we shouldn’t, but we live in a corrupt society where if this gets out in a job like ours, we’re screwed,” Taron said.
“Why? Teacher’s can be in relationships, when I was in school there were two teacher’s that met at school and married! What can Mrs Reynolds do about it?” Rich argued. 
“Yes but they were a straight couple, am I right? It’s not just the fact that we’re teachers, and it’s not just Mrs Reynolds finding out, it’s the fact that if this was out the whole school would find out and we would be belittled and viewed differently. We can’t afford for that to happen, it would change everything,” Taron gave his boyfriend a small smile “I hate to say it but, it’s just a fact of society.”
“I know,” Rich groaned, “it’s just ridiculous.”
“It is,” Taron agreed, “anyway I have to get to class.”
“Yeah that’s alright, text me updates on Ella.”
“Will do, I love you,” Taron smiled. Rich briefly stopped breathing, that was the first time ‘I love you’ had been said.
“I-I love you too,” he stuttered in return, a warm feeling building inside of him. Rich watched as Taron disappeared out of the classroom door, not sure whether to feel happy and warm because he had a beautiful boyfriend who loved him, or angry because despite this he had to hide it from the world. Everything would change, the way their students saw them, how their colleagues would treat them, all because they both loved a man. Because they didn’t conform to the social norm, and it wasn’t fair.
__________________________________________________
Taron waited nervously for his class to filter in, shaking his leg under the table; a habit that bugged Rich as much as his pacing bugged Taron. They were learning to love and accept each other’s quirks as time went on though, it made them who they were, and it was kind of fun to to watch each other’s foibles come out the more time they spent together. Suddenly a quiet “morning Sir” shook Taron out of his thoughts.
“Ella!” he exclaimed, standing up abruptly from his desk, knocking his pencil pot over in the process. He cleared his throat awkwardly, coming out from behind the desk, ignoring the splayed out pens and pencils.
“I- uh, it’s really good to see you, how are you?” he asked cautiously.
“Getting there,” Ella replied with a small smile.
“You’re early,” Taron said, glancing at the small clock on the wall above the whiteboard.
“Yeah I thought I’d come in early to say hi, the Head said you’ve been worried about me,” she chuckled.
“He did?” Taron spluttered, “I mean, I was, just didn’t think he’d tell you that..”
“No it’s all good, I appreciate the concern,” Ella replied quickly. Taron stood awkwardly, habitually scratching the back of his neck.
“If you ever need to talk just let me know, I feel like maybe I didn’t do enough before..” he trailed off from his own sentence.
“You did more than anyone else bothers to do,” Ella admitted glumly.
“Really?” Taron asked, Ella nodded in reply.
“Well I’m glad I did something then,” he smiled. At this the other students began to filter into the large classroom, all chattering amongst themselves, no doubt discussing what they got up to over the weekend. Ella gave Taron a last smile before disappearing to find somewhere to sit, she felt her face heat up from the stares of all the other students who were looking at her with mixed looks. Some looked sympathetic, some looked guilty, some looked judgemental, she didn’t want any of it. She didn’t want the sympathy or the guilt and certainly didn’t want the judgement. She knew what she did was stupid, because there were people who would miss her, but it’s impossible to think of that at the time. She felt like there was no other way out, and even though it would mean she was essentially taking the easy way out, she didn’t know what else to do. So she decided it was game over. By some miracle, game over didn’t work, life gave her another chance, and now she had to figure out why. What was she good for here?
“Alright everyone, eyes to the front,” Taron called, directing the attention away from Ella. He began his lesson, only having to deal with one issue when two boys looked like they were about to have a punch out with each other for no apparent reason, which is usually the case with fights that happen in this school; they start from nothing. Taron understood, he always felt like he had more empathy than most of the other staff members. Although he was as sick of breaking up fights as the rest of his colleagues, he understood that teenagers have so many more emotions circling around their head than him, a full grown adult. It was so hard being that age, you haven’t found yourself yet, other kids are mean, adults tell you that you need to decide what to do with your life, it’s too much pressure. He absolutely despised adults that say teenagers ‘overreact’ or ‘don’t know how easy they have it’ some of these adults even being other teachers in the staff room. He hated it. Being a teenager absolutely sucked, and no adult should forget what it was like and become the kind of person that talks about them that way. 
Once the class were settled into the task that Taron gave them and were getting on with it themselves, he subtly pulled his phone out to text Rich.
Taron: hey, Ella’s here, she’s alright, hows class? miss you x
Rich: hey, good! glad to hear that, class is alright they’re all busy, what about yours? miss u too x
Taron: yeah they’re good, finally settled down they just had to get monday morning weekend chat out of their system x
Rich: yep it’s gotta be done! hey wanna eat out later? was thinking we should do that on mondays, just to make us feel better about it being monday x
Taron: I like your thinking Mr Madden, where shall we eat out this week then?x
Rich: wetherspoons? not like we’ll run into mrs reynolds there she probably thinks she’s too good for a cheap restaurant like that x
Taron: lol you’re right, spoons sounds good, gotta go love you x
Rich: love you too, see you at break x
Taron slipped his phone back into his pocket to turn his attention back to his computer and began to type away, only turning back to the class when they were ready to present their mock performances to him. He had to give them credit, his Monday morning class were quite well behaved and able to get on with their work without too much trouble, meaning Taron could get a lot of admin done. Once the class finished, the students began to shuffle out of the classroom in a flock, performing a chorus of either “bye Mr E” or “bye Sir” as they left to their next class. Taron didn’t care what they called him, he was one of those laid back teachers. He lets the sixth form students call him Taron, seeing as they are college age and only choosing to be here for further education. A healthy amount of informality build a stronger bond of trust, as long as you can equally mix it with professionalism. 
“Sir?” Ella’s small voice appeared from behind him.
“What’s up Ella?” he asked.
“Can I hide in here on break today? I’m not ready for everyone to stare at me on break too.”
“I actually meet Mr Madden on break-“ Taron started, but stopped himself quickly “but yeah sure! We can all hang out in here if you don’t mind us both being here.”
“I’d love that, you two are much nicer than any of the students or even other teachers,” she admitted.
“Aw!” Taron beamed, “well I’m glad you have us then.”
“I’ll see you on break,” Ella smiled, almost genuinely as if she was actually happy, which was progress that Taron was pleased with.
Taron: Ellas gonna be in my classroom with us on break, hope that’s alright, you know, a student hanging out with us lol x
Rich: I don’t mind at all, she’s going through a lot, she’s a nice kid anyway. Also it keeps us from doing things we don’t wanna get caught for ;)x
Taron: shush, naughty boy x
Rich: you love it x
Taron: I do x
Rich finished his second class of the day and began to hurry over to Taron’s classroom to see his boy after two long hours without him. He stopped at the staff room on the way to do their break time coffee run, praying he didn’t see Mrs Reynolds in there. His prayers went thoroughly unanswered, as there she was, stood with her back to the door making a coffee. Rich audibly sighed and considered turning back, but decided to just be an adult and stride in, make the coffees, and leave. To his delight, Mrs Reynolds said nothing to him when she saw him come in, she just finished making her coffee and took a seat at one of the tables with a few other teachers from hers and Rich’s corridor of classrooms.
“Did you hear?” Rich heard her say to the other teachers around the table, his ears instantly tuning into the conversation. 
“Hear what?” they all chirped in, excited at the prospect of gossip.
“Two male teachers here have been seen hugging intimately in one of their cars,”  Mrs Reynolds quipped, sounding proud of herself.
What the fuck has she said that for?! Rich seethed inside of his head, trying to keep a poker face and not let on to anyone around.
“Really?! Who?” a Geography teacher asked with intense curiosity.
“I don’t know,” Mrs Reynolds lied, leaning back and sipping her coffee, glancing to Rich quickly who tried to slow down his dramatically increased breathing.
What have we ever done to her?
“Just heard it on the grapevine,” Mrs Reynolds shrugged. “Have you heard about it, Richard?” Rich’s shoulders stiffened and breath hitched as he was mid way through pouring the second coffee. He knew he’d have to put the acting skills he always attempted to harness into practise right now. If only it was Taron here not him, he’s literally a drama teacher, go figure he is amazing at acting.
“Haven’t heard anything,” Rich said casually, clearing his throat to deepen his voice as if that would somehow make him sound straight even though he didn’t particularly “sound gay” in the first place, he hated stereotypes like that.
“Really? That’s funny, the conversation that I overheard about it mentioned your name suggesting you were someone who knew about it,” Mrs Reynolds pondered slyly. Rich could feel his face become flushed and hot, and anger was boiling up inside of him, he felt like he was about to pass out any second.
“Must have been a mistake,” he tried to say cooly, but not doing so well anymore. “Anyway, I’d better go before these aren’t hot anymore,” he chuckled lightly, trying to change the subject and retreat naturally.
“Oh who’s the other coffee for?” Mrs Reynolds persisted, poking further and further. Rich could feel tears of anger trying to emerge, but he held them back, pursing his lips to stop them quivering. What did she have against him? Why was she poking at him as if he was a collapsed animal that she was trying to get a reaction out of with a stick to make sure it’s alive.
“A friend,” Rich blurted out in a panic, turning away abruptly and walking out of the door as fast as he could, realising now that he had probably raised more suspicion by doing that. He continued to stifle the angry tears, making it all the way to the drama block before they spilled out as he approached Taron’s classroom. Forgetting Ella was in there, he kicked the door open; as oppose to turning around and backing into it as he usually would with a coffee in each hand.
“For fuck sake!” he said, the words coming out as more of a sob than an exclamation.
“Shit,” he swore under his breath, now realising that he’d totally forgotten that Ella would be in the room, who was looking at him with a strange mixture of shock at seeing a teacher crying, but also relief that teachers do have emotions too. It made her feel less silly somehow, it brought out the human side of them.
“I forgot you’d be here Ella,” Rich chuckled softly, putting the coffee mugs down so he could sheepishly wipe his wet cheeks with his sleeve.
“What’s wrong bub?” Taron cooed, getting up from his desk to wrap his arms around Rich, not caring at all that Ella was here. He hadn’t seen Rich cry yet, he was always the rational one while Taron was the more weepy, emotional one. He just wanted to hold and protect him.
“Um, you-know-who was indirectly telling the other staff about you-know-what and asking me about it to try and make me crack,” Rich tried to explain, conscious of the other presence in the room.
“Did you crack?” Taron asked.
“Not completely, only a little bit when she asked who the other coffee was for,” Rich admitted.
“What has she got against us?!” Taron demanded, not sure whether he was asking Rich or asking some sort of higher power. Ella sat quietly, unintentionally drinking in the whole conversation. She couldn’t figure out whether Taron had forgotten that she was intuitive, or if he had genuinely thought that they were being cryptic. It was obvious what they were talking about, it didn’t take an absolute genius to put two and two together. The hug, ‘bub’, ‘you-know-who’ was obviously a teacher because they were talking to the other staff and Rich had just been in the staff room because he had coffee, of course the biggest give away was ‘she asked who the other coffee was for’, and now Rich is here, giving the other coffee to Taron, so by elimination the ‘you-know-what’ must be a secret relationship between her two teachers. Taron just suddenly realised all this as he looked over to Ella gingerly and saw her sat with a sympathetic smile on her face.
“You understood all of that didn’t you?” he laughed nervously. Ella just nodded slowly with pursed lips.
“Sorry.”
“It’s not your fault darlin’, just don’t tell anyone yeah? I trust you,” Taron admitted.
“Of course I won’t! I know how it feels to be bullied, I could never do that to anyone else, plus I know…how it feels to not be out,” she sniffled, terrifying herself with the thought of anyone at school finding out that she was bi-sexual. In fact she’d never told a single soul, who knew the first people she would tell would be two of her teachers? She thought it would be her parents, an obstacle she never wanted to cross but worried that she would eventually have to.
“Oh,” Taron said, understanding immediately. “Well, we understand. Looks like we all have a similar secret.”  
“Yeah, we do,” Ella said sadly. Wondering if maybe tonight should be the tonight that she finally tells her parents, praying that they don’t overreact. 
____________________________________________________
Tag list: @taron-eggmcmuffin @coffeetalkbaby @nataschalenasblog @stateofloveandvedder @winterismyfavoriteseason1945
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doodles-arts · 5 years ago
Text
Secrets
Donatello x reader
a lovey request;  What about 🤫 secrets relationship with Donatello. I can just see him sneaking off during patrol to visit you in your apartment when Leo follows him one night and finds out.?
How’d he meet you? The internet of course. 
At first he wanted a friend, interested and studied in the art of astrology. Thankfully, he found you. You were an undergraduate who passed her AP astrology class with flying colors. You of course proved yourself by having a few chats with the genius himself and he had practically fell in love. Science was overall Donnie’s passion and finding someone who loved it as much as yourself was liberating. Of course your love for science came more with the exception of earth science. Just as exciting though! 
He stayed up all night sending you texts as he went through his astrology textbook, you stayed up with him until the late hours of the night. You never minded until he’d comment about the time. He found that odd, but never questioned you. 
Though you liked to keep things professional, in a teacher- student kind of way, you were the first to propose calling. At first, he had declined, fearing his brothers would find out about his secret teacher. Who was human and very much, against the rules, or tease him for needing a teacher. Either way the third time you asked to call you explained it would make it easier for yourself to explain things to the 4 eyed turtle. He caved, pretending it was necessary for his learning. He did fear that soon you’d ask to video chat, but one night you had sent a video showing him an example instead of just video calling him and doing it yourself. You both never touched the subject, but were both certain you knew each others boundaries and never over stepped them. Donatello respected you and you respected him. 
Though after a year of learning the material with you and ‘graduated’ in your terms, Donnie had grown accustomed with your late night talks. So after a week of not speaking to you, Donnie still couldn’t come up with a single excuse. But, before he could work the nerve of texting you first, you did! Texting him a simple ‘hey!’. Jeez, why hadn’t he thought of that? 
Simple and straight to the point, just like you. Thankfully you texted him first and kept texting him after. He helped you with your calculus class and you assisted him with all his botany science questions, which was a new science he picked up and was trying to learn. Though, he told you it was just an ‘extra class he signed up for’, you didn’t even second guess him. The first time you video called him he declined S O quickly. He came up with some bullshit excuse and you shrugged it off when he apologized. 
Thankfully you didn’t find it odd, and was why he liked your relationship, he found you very endearing. He thought your voice was very cute and soothing. He always thought that you being a university teacher was a great choice, you had a very good teacher voice. You never let Donnie slack when you both worked, you were punctual, and you expected fast results and if you didn’t receive them you’d start again from scratch. He respected you, and looked up to you. It wasn’t until one day that he stayed up working, after he hung up on you that he and woke up extremely late the next morning for training and was sent to the hashi, that he ranted to you. Leo had sold him out, claiming he heard Don awake and didn’t even bother to wake him up. Letting Splinter deal with him, he didn’t even let his brothers wake him up either! The man set him up!
Either way, he ranted to you. And you listened and gave him real and good advice. Reminding him about the stone cold truth, that he shouldn’t have been up so late anyway, and sent the purple terrapin to bed for a nap. Your study-sesh could be moved to tomorrow, his health was more important. 
That might have been the afternoon he fell hard for you, you cared? Like, you cared because his health was important to you, not because he was related to you or because if he slipped up it could affect you too. You cared because he was your friend, and that’s exactly what sold him. After that you had called him in the middle of the night by video call and he almost had a heart attack. But declined it anyway, apologizing for not being able to pick up your video call. You apologized profusely soon after, saying it was an accident, you meant to press regular call. He shrugged it off, feeling worse that he could never show his face to you. Still, it was strange that’d you press the wrong button. Don never judged or questioned you, he had his own flaws to be questioning.
Though one night, fessed up with the responsibility of being a ninja, turtle, and a teenager all wrapped in one, exploded in his head. He was tired of who he was, tired of science and his recent failed experiment that tipped him over. Exhausted of saving a city of humans who would never understand or care for existence. Fed up with his older brothers who were better than him in every aspect that mattered. Spent with himself, his faults and fighting his inner demons. He texted you in the middle of the night, asking if you were awake. Thankfully it was a Thursday and you didn’t have school on Friday’s, so you were binge watching Kevin Hart stand up comedies on Netflix. 
“Yes, are you alright?”
D-”yes’
D-”not really, if I'm being honest. I'm having a bad day.”
“Would you like to talk about it? I think an extra ear might help”
D-....
D-”could I call you?”
You opted to call him instead of texting him an answer, however, seeing as you pressed the wrong button, again,the night got a lot more interesting. He didn’t want to break, but the fact he couldn’t even pick up your video chat just because he was a mutant turtle had pushed him over the edge. He sobbed quietly as he typed on his phone, his skinny 6 fingers trembled on his screen. Why couldn’t he be normal? Like you?
D-”i’m not allowed to video chat. I’m not normal like you. You can’t see me”
“Normal? HA! Donnie I’m blind! I’m far from normal hun, but if your more comfortable talking on an audio call that’s fine by me, It’s the reason I keep touching the wrong buttons.”
Blind? You were blind! He could actually talk to another human on video chat, without the fear of being judged. Would he take it? What if you were lying? He’d just have to point the camera to the ceiling and see it were true. No turning back now.
Ring…. Ring.. Ring…. Ring.. 
“Donnie? Hun, are you there? Are you okay?” As he sat on his bed and saw your beautiful face. You were sitting on a chair and your phone was propped up by something and showed you from your torso up. You were wearing a white pajama tank, your hair was tied up/let down, framing your face perfectly. Your baby hairs fell above your eyes, and Donnie could see you were indeed blind. Your eyes were completely white. He couldn’t hold back the sobbed that escaped him once it was clear you were blind. He knew it was extremely selfish, but he could finally feel normal, attractive for once. You calmed him down and reassured him that he didn’t have anything to hide because you could never judge him. You sweet reassurances sent him straight to a good night’s rest. You couldn’t tell until you were certain he was no longer sobbing and ask if he was alright and once he didn’t respond, you shut the phone off and went to sleep. 
Ever since that night he video called you every other day. It was just so relieving to be able to stay on the phone with someone and quite literally look at the camera like any other normal teenager. 
Donatello’s attitude changed overtime. Participating in more family activities with his brothers with the boost of confidence. More nights than others he was excited to go to bed because it meant that he could talk to you. Though Don still struggled with social interactions with April and Casey, he always felt better prepared after talking to you about it. He felt closer to you after a month. He practically knew you after the next 4. And after another 3 months he felt confident enough to share his state with you, and what do you know? You live in New York too!
After a year of knowing you intimately his brothers suspected something but never dug on it. After a year Donnie started to imagine moments he knew could never happen with you. Leo began to grow suspicious of Donnie, knowing he was hiding something. His other brothers brushed him off, “he’s a really private guy Leo. He doesn’t like to talk about new inventions until he’s finished with them.”
What Donatello didn’t know was that after a year of getting to know him and deeming him the sweetest soul you have ever met, you started to slowly fall for him. He was such a blast! He even made blind jokes with you, that’s how you knew he liked and accepted you. And you returned the favor. He was always so sweet and so curious. You fell in love with his little snort and quirky squeak whenever he got excited or the way he stuttered whenever he felt shy. Gosh, you wanted to meet him so bad, but you were afraid that once he met you, he’d think you were as helpless like everyone else did. There were times where you met people and than when everything was going fine they would mother hen you and you hated being controlled. You liked trying new things, but you couldn’t really do that if your partner refused to do everything out of fear. Fearing something new should be your own concern, not anyone else’s. 
You weren’t the only one who wanted to see the other. See, donnie was afraid that once you felt his shell, his scaly skin or three fingered hands, you’d be afraid and want nothing to do with him. He avoided the possibility as much as possible, afraid of the truth. It didn’t matter if you did accept him for what he was, you could never love him. Because he wasn’t normal. Didn’t matter how patient you were or open minded, no woman could love a monster like him. That was just the truth. He kept his selfish wants out of this friendship. 
But your birthday was coming up, he of course was going to get you something and mail it, or make you something in all honesty. That’s not what you asked for your birthday, though. “I want to meet you hun, in person.” God, why did you have to say it like that? Of course he promised he would meet you, you suggested a cafe close by that you could walk to. He laughed pitifully, smoothly suggesting a picnic under the skies on your apartment rooftop. You seemed skeptical at first, and Donnie stuttered up a storm trying to save his own neck and you laughed, agreeing to his idea. “I’ll have to bring lavender, since I never really been up there before.” Ah, yes, lavender, your grey pit bull and guide dog. Donnie didn’t want to miss this for the world,even though he knew it was a bad idea.
It was pre-planned. Everything set, written in stone. He made you a beautiful music box with the song ‘Sleepwalk’ by Santo and Johanny, with smooth brail on the bottom that read “The memory of you lingers like a song,'' a line from your favorite song. He couldn’t wait to go out to see you. The weather said zero winds or rain. So you knew you’d be okay. And with lavender, you knew you wouldn’t walk off an edge. 
As the boys prepared to go to bed early and leave for patrol later than usual because, well, it was spring, Don was preparing everything he had to take for the picnic. God, he really must be stuck on you to be doing this. As he snuck out, tool bag and box hiding everything a voice stopped him, “Donnie? Where are you going?” 
Leo. 
He was prepared for this, practiced his lines in case this would happen, “another bird made a nest on the satellite, I’m going to fix it up. Perhaps upgrade it a bit for more channels.” Leo thought about it and nodded at his explanation. Yeah, it made sense and sounded credible, so he let Don off the hook and out the lair. As he arrived close to your rooftop, he spotted your white dress, and his jaw almost dropped. You were beautiful. And lavender was just as big as he’d imagined. He was nervous now. One touch and the truth was out. You’d know what he truly was. 
He took a deep breath and ran into the storm of doubt, fear and regret head on. There was no backing up know. It was too important and he had come too far. “Hey (Y/N), i-it’s me!”
You turned to look at him, staring at his direction but not his face. You stared right at his chest, “Donnie! I’m so happy you made it.” You were trying to hold lavender back as she wiggled in excitement to meet Don. You took off her service dog vest so she knew she was off duty and could greet Donnie. “She’s a big ol’ sap! She loves meeting people, she must recognize your voice”, he knelt down to hug the ball of sweetness. “She really is, she very well trained.”
“Oh yes, she knows only to greet the people who greet her first! Now come over here and give me a hug Don!” You said with a grin arms open wide waiting for him to step forward because you really couldn’t. He swallowed hard, unsure of what to do next, “I should warn you right now. Tell you the truth now that we’ve known each other for more than two years. I-..I-If I told you that someone you care about was using the identity of another? O-Or that your close friend wasn’t who o-or what you believed him to be.. Would you resent him?” You smiled kindly at him, you could never resent Donnie, never could you ever think of a life without him!
“Donnie, I don’t care if your skin was green and you grew antenna and people called you an alien. I can’t see, I don’t even remember what humans really look like. As long as your serial killer, I think I’d still love you Donatello.”
“Really?”
“Positive, now show me exactly what about yourself that makes you so different!” You said while holding your hands out again with your palm towards him. He took a deep breath, his anxiety seeping into his core of calm. He pushed his hand against your own, his palm facing yours like that scene from Tarzan. You quirked an eyebrow amusingly, not really phased by him only him have three fingers. He grew eager, truly believing that you could accept him. He put his things down gently and grabbed your other hand and laid it against one of his arms. His scales were against your soft human skin and it felt like sin. Your eyebrows, furrowed up in confusion, why was his skin so rough? He then grabbed both of your hands and placed them against his plastron, and your mouth opened agape. And your hands began roaming on their own. He slowly knelt down as you tried to reach his shoulders. You began roaming his shoulder and your fingers brushed against his shell. Fingers grasping the edge of it and your jaw slacked, “Donnie, I don’t understand? What-”
“Those four mutants you hear about on the news? Those are me and my brothers. I-I know i’m not what you expected or wanted for as a friend, but I hoped, I-I wanted for you to accept- Oof” you cut him off by jumping into his arms and hugging his neck with your tiny arms compared to his own. “I-I don’t care! Your my best friend! I love you, I don’t care! I’m so sorry, you must have been killing yourself over this and I didn’t even try!” He was shocked but hugged you back, rubbing soothing circles on your back to reassure you. “Not at all, you just made my night.”
You pulled back and shakily took his face into your hands, holding each cheek against your palms. Feeling for his snout, lips and forehead with your thumbs. He could feel his temperature rise as you leaned forward. Kissing his forehead, “I-”, next his snout, “like-”, than, “-you”, his lips. He couldn't have dreamed of it being any better. It was exactly as he had prayed for it to be to whoever would listen. You attacked his lips after a second of getting him used to the feeling of a kiss. Hungrily attacking him, and he let you, because he enjoyed it immensely. Lavender whimpered in the back and covered her big dog eyes with her paws, and you lifted up for air. “I guess I forgot i‘m the only one can’t see,” you both laughed and lavender walked over to you as Donnie passed you your gift and set the picnic up. It was absolutely beautiful, with wonderful engravings and beautiful music. 
“Oh hun, it’s beautiful, it’s the best gift I've ever gotten!” He sat down next to you, showing you the brail part and you squealed, “is it worthy enough for a second kiss?” You laughed and leaned against him, “those kisses are already yours, you’ve just gotta take ‘em Don~”
From that week forward Donnie tried as much as possible to meet with you, and take his kisses. It felt good saying that. He was getting good at that, kissing you, he was a natural. You could kiss him all day, if only the night would let him. Donnie had become frantic for your kisses as well, he left almost  bi weekly to see you, coming up with all excuses imaginable to tell Leo and his brothers. He was turning sloppy though and snuck out to see you weekly, and Leo was catching on but Donatello couldn’t help it not after the way you both spent your last date night. 
You had ordered food and laid in bed, he fed you and you cuddled him. Once he bent down to kiss you, you were ready to kiss back. You had missed him, you kissed him very good, slow and sensual. Laid up against him, you both kissed all night and he was loopy by the time he got home. You did things to him, that he could never tell you. But you didn’t mind and neither did he, you had ways of making him talk and he liked those ways better. He loved the way you’d lay next to him and you’d whisper the sweetest things while pecking his face and neck with kisses on your couch. 
This week was no exception, he had to go see you. He was craving your lips and when Leo blocked his exit out, he came up with the same excuse as last week without noticing; rookie mistake and Leo had his answer. He is going to get to the bottom of what Donnie was hiding, because his brother could get hurt, it was getting out of hand. 
He had brought a blanket and you brought up Lavender’s doggy bed to the rooftop as you and Donnie laid on the blanket and lavender on her bed. You trailed patterns on Donnie’s plastron as he rubbed circles on your hip, you were both wrapped around each other, contently talking science nonsense and theories when he leaned down for a kiss. And wow, what a kiss, if Donnie kept learning like that, you were gonna jump him! You felt a rumble and vibration in his chest against your hand as your licked his bottom lip. “Ohh what was that hun?” He chuckled nervously, “it’s called a churr, we make it when were very happy or excited,” his soft little voice only encouraged you more to tease him, “then please, don’t hold back, I like it~” you whispered as you took his lips and hungrily feasted on the taste of him. You both pulled back to breath, and when he leaned down to steal a peck, he tensed up. 
Afraid you had pushed him a little too far you pulled away from him completely, “what’s wrong?” You asked looking as what you hoped was his face. (It wasn’t) 
“Donnie, what the hell are you doing?” There was someone else on the roof with you? Lavender, unconsciously left her seat on her bed to sit next to you as Donnie got up from his spot on the blanket. You tried to do the same, looking to wherever he went worriedly. Who was here? Looking for lavender, desperate for a set of eyes, an explanation of who was here and what was going to happen!
“Leo, what are you doing here?” Leo? As in his brother? Looking towards the ground, ashamed of yourself, you couldn’t even greet his brother by yourself. Lavender finally appeared against your hands and pointed towards where Leo and Donnie were. You patted her twice on the side to let her know you received the information. You felt helpless, knowing Donnie would be ridiculed for being with someone as pathetic as yourself. You couldn’t even walk up to greet him because you were scared to walk over to Leo without assistance, scared for once because of your disability. 
“I followed you, hoping I’d find anything but… but this! Donnie your putting our family in danger, your putting her in danger! She could tell anyone!” Donnie tried to defend you, as you curl up into lavender and she whimpered sympathetically and tried to hold you back. “Donnie, how can you be sure? She knows what we look like, she has enough proof for anything, one threat or one change of heart and she’ll-“ 
“stop it.”
You had enough, no longer would you be accused of something so low! Sure you were blind and needed help with basic everyday things, you were used to being overlooked because you were blind, but you had empathy and learned to never be unkind to others. Not having a sense as a kid had been very hard, life was unkind to you, but it didn’t mean you should pass it on. “I’m blind. I’d never betray Donnie like that, he means too much to me. And even if someone forced me to talk or bribed me, NO ONE would find what I say credible. Because I’ve been blind since I was born and people believe that blind people make things up, because we can’t see.” You were furious and tired of being treated as less of a person because of your disability. 
The awkward silence made you chuckle at yourself, hanging your face low again, “I’m looking the wrong way again aren’t I?” Donnie chuckled before walking back over to you, directing your face to where Leo was standing. And you continued, “I’ve never met anyone like Donatello, everyone treats me like a piece of glass. They harbor me and try to control me. Not Donnie, he helps me, he lets me explore my limits without making me feel bad if I can’t surpass them.” You turned over to where you felt he was standing, “hopefully I’m looking at you when I say, Donnie I’m in love with you, and I pray every night you’ll never change, that you’ll never leave.”
Leo couldn’t help the little smile that appeared once you . His little brother had found love. Real and genuine love, and he couldn’t have been happier for him. Maybe he was too harsh on you, but he was thankful for it. Because after that, he was certain that Donnie was in good hands and he could see you did love him. You were blind and you still sensed his presence as if it were your own. “Than I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have expected any less from my brother. He’s too smart to have made such a rash decision, you must be a very special girl.”
You grinned widely, smiling over to where you believed he was-(he wasn’t),”I am because I have him.” He sighed happily for the love you both shared. And took his leave, “I’ll see you at the lair Donnie, you’ve got a lot of explaining to do.” 
Donnie could care less about some lair and explaining to his brothers. You loved him! You loved him, and he couldn’t be happier and he was going to show you. Pulling you closer and looking down at lavender to send her back to her bed with a smile, he turned to you and you giggled. “Why do I get the feeling your going to try something new?” You asked. Oh, he most definitely was! 
“I am…”, one hand on the small of your back and the other holding the back of your head. Turning you around in a half circle to dip you. You giggled and arched your back as Donnie peppered kisses down your cheek and neck. Kissing his way back up and giving your nose the last peck. “I love you too, dove. I’m so glad I met you.” You nuzzled your nose against his snout humming contently. “Less talking, more kissing”, he gave you exactly what you wanted. 
He never wanted to go home, having to explain too… “SPLINter”
Uh oh!
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crying-gay-tears · 5 years ago
Text
Brighter Than the Sun (3/?)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
ao3
A thunderstorm and existential thoughts keep the boys awake. 
Chapter 3: Questioning
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gon tossed in bed as a clap of thunder echoed in the air outside his dorm. It hadn’t woken him up--he hadn’t actually fallen asleep yet--but it was enough to shake the window in its frame. A few seconds later and his room was illuminated by a flash as lightning ripped across the sky. He counted in his head ‘1, 2, 3, 4, 5’... another thunderclap, another flash. Huh, so the storm was about a mile away then. He knew this was coming, the signs had been showing the last few days. Birds were flying low yesterday and there was a ring around the moon that night. He could smell it in the air as well. He was grateful it waited until Friday night to finally hit. It meant he could have a nice rainy Saturday indoors with no classes to interrupt. Another crack of thunder and lightning, and the rain finally started. He settled on his back and listened to the heavy pitter patter against the roof.
The room was dark aside from the dim blue light of the street lamp outside the window. It illuminated the rain flowing down the glass, casting fluid shadows that danced across the floor. He laid awake watching them, mind wandering.Usually when it stormed, it brought him a sense of calm and peace. On nights like these he slept like a rock; but for some reason, tonight he couldn’t seem to sleep at all. Maybe it was because this was his first stormy night spent away from Whale Island. He had definitely been feeling the differences that living in a city made in his daily life. Maybe he was a little homesick, and maybe the storm was just making that feeling grow.
He glanced up at the desk across the room. The bright red digits of his alarm clock glared back at him, letting him know it was well past 1am. Just as he moved to bury his face in his pillow, he heard a thud followed by some rustling on the other side of his bedroom door. Eager for a distraction from his own restlessness, he kicked his blanket aside and snuck out to the common room. He wasn’t sure what he expected to find, but Killua on the floor scrambling to scoop chips back into a bowl was not it.
~~~~~~~~
After about two hours of tossing and turning in bed, Killua found himself in the common room, rolled up in a blanket on the couch with a bowl of cheese puffs and a baking show playing on the tv.
He was having trouble sleeping, which wasn’t really new, per se, but the thoughts running through his mind and keeping him from sleep certainly were. Earlier that day was the first meeting for the GSA, and Gon convinced him to go. Not that it took too much effort, Killua had been curious about it weeks ago when Gon first mentioned it.
The meeting was a little over an hour long, and Killua was on edge for most of that hour. There were a bunch of people there, all of them seemed nice enough, but it was still a bit overwhelming. He wasn’t even sure if he should be there in the first place.
They all introduced themselves with their name, pronouns, and sexuality if they were comfortable sharing. Killua waited with baited breath until it was his turn, then he quickly declared “Killua, he/him” and turned to Gon to pass the spotlight, who was carefree and confident when he spoke. ”I’m Gon! I didn’t really know what pronouns were before now, but mine are he/him! And I don’t know what to say about my sexualty, I’m here to hopefully figure it out!”
Killua was amazed the whole time at how easily Gon fit into the group, like they’d all been friends for years. He was starting to learn that that’s just how Gon was. He was comfortable with everyone he met and he navigated life with a confidence that stemmed from his own optimism.
Killua spent most of the time quietly observing. The group leaders talked about what it felt like for them when they realized they were queer. A few told their coming out stories, some of acceptance and some of isolation. They talked about the spectrum of sexuality and what each letter in the acronym was. Killua, who had entered the meeting assuming he was just going to be an ally, left that afternoon with the burning letter Q in his mind.
Questioning. Something about that word felt so comfortable to him. It felt like a word he could sit with for a while. Under the umbrella of questioning, he had the space to think about all the new perspectives he received during the meeting.
He assumed he was just an ally, but when he heard about all the things you could be besides straight… Ally didn’t feel like it really fit. And that was because straight definitely didn't feel like fit him anymore. To be honest, looking back, he wasn’t sure if it ever really fit him in the first place. But straight was what he always was, wasn’t it? It was never really something that got talked about directly, but it was always assumed. He’d only ever been asked about girlfriends, or girl crushes growing up. He’d been called a lady’s man by his parents’ friends, and he was always told he’d make a nice young lady very happy one day. It started to feel like being straight was kind of...expected of him? He never realized there was any other way to be.
But as overwhelmed as he was with the suffocating straightness, he was equally overwhelmed by the world of queerness that he had no experience with.
Straight didn’t feel right--and that was scary in and of itself--but he also wasn’t ready to declare himself as gay or bi or pan or any of the other letters. He just… wasn’t sure yet. So he was Questioning.
And boy was he questioning.
Everything.
What did this mean? Would he have to come out to his family if he decided he was gay? Or bi? Should he tell them now that he was questioning? Or wait until he figured it out 100%? When would that happen?
He couldn’t imagine his family being too cool about it, not that they were cool about much to begin with. When did he start caring about what they think anyways? He’d gotten piercings, dyed and cut his hair, snuck out, and done pretty much anything to piss them off and free himself just a little bit. If being gay pissed them off, he shouldn’t care! But would he? Wait, when did he decide he was gay? He wasn’t! Was he?
His phone buzzing on the couch next to him snapped him out of his thoughts, and he jerked in surprise, sending his snack flying. He hissed as the bowl clattered onto the floor, spilling cheese puffs everywhere.
He was on his knees scooping them back into the bowl frantically with his hands when he heard a door creak open. Before he could react, Gon was standing over him, a strange smile on his face.
“Want some help?”
“Oh, no thanks I’ve got it.” He threw the last puff back into the bowl and dumped them all into the trash. “Sorry if the bowl dropping woke you up.”
“It’s okay, it didn’t wake me up, I couldn’t sleep anyways.”
“Did the storm scare you or something?”
“No, ” his brow was furrowed and his lips formed a small pout. “I usually sleep like well on stormy nights. I don’t know why I’m so awake right now. I was thinking maybe I’m homesick.”
“Ah” Killua flopped onto the couch, pouring more chips into the bowl.
“Is that why you’re awake? The storm scared you?”
He scoffed. “No, I just have a lot on my mind, I guess.”
“Can I join you?”
“Uh, yeah, sure”
He made room on the couch and Gon sat down next to him. When he started tugging at the blanket, Killua just stared in confusion. He kept tugging until, finally understanding, Killua pulled the blanket off of himself and spread it over the both of them. Gon scooted in closer and let out a contented sigh. Their arms and thighs were touching, and Killua was doing his best to remain calm. Were they supposed to be sitting this close? Gon was always kinda touchy feely, and Killua had never really had friends like this before, was this just what friends did? They were watching tv, that was normal. Was he just overthinking?
“So, what’s on your mind, Killua?”
He almost jumped out of his skin. “I..uh, what?”
“You said you had a lot on your mind, and if it was keeping you from sleep I thought you might wanna talk about it.”
“Oh, no... I’m okay, just thinking about school stuff, yknow, homework and whatever.”
Gon just chuckled in response.
“What’s so funny?” he huffed.
“Nothing, it’s just that you’re a terrible liar.”
Killua’s mouth fell open in surprise.
“I am not! I-”
“It’s okay, we don’t have to talk about whatever is bothering you.” He reached for another cheesepuff from the bowl in Killua’s lap. “It’s also okay if you’re scared of storms.” He smiled as he pushed the chip into his mouth.
“I’m not scared, Gon. Just couldn’t sleep. Seriously.”
“Okay, Killu, whatever you say. You know, storms used to scare me when I was younger. Mito-san always calmed me down with herbal tea and sometimes she’d sing to me. Did your parents ever do anything to help soothe you on stormy nights?”
“Well, no, not really. Not that storms ever scared me,” he side-eyed Gon, “but they’re not really the comforting type anyway so it wouldn’t matter anyway.”
“Oh?” Gon’s eyes were wide, not with judgement, but with genuine curiosity. “What are your parents like then? Tell me about them.”
Killua sighed. ”They weren’t really around much. Though I don’t think it’s because their jobs are super cool.“ Gon laughed and he pressed on.
“My dad is a criminal defense lawyer, just like his dad before him and his dad before him. My mom’s a criminal psychologist, so they make a great team. They both went to fancy colleges and come from rich families. All they really care about is maintaining social standing and images, and the family name, and of course money. They throw a lot of parties and dinners for clients and their colleagues, so I spent a ton of my life, including most holidays, stuffed into a stiff penguin suit with a fake smile speaking only when spoken to and never about what was actually on my mind.”
Gon frowned, his eyes were intense and urged him to continue.
“They’re only ever involved with my life when they’re trying to control it. I had to fight with them for months to let me go to a college so far from home. They wanted me to go to my father’s alma mater and get a law degree and eventually run the firm with my older brother,” he rolled his eyes. “But they’ve never once asked me what I want to do, or how I want to live.”
“What do you want to do?”
Killua blinked in surprise. “I, uh… well, I’m not really sure yet,” he dropped his head, staring at the bowl in his lap, “I really don’t know. But I want the freedom to figure it out for myself. Without their pressure or judgement.”
“That’s more than fair. You’re your own person, you should be able to make your own decisions!” Gon’s brow was furrowed, his mouth set in a tight line, clearly upset with what he’d just heard. Killua couldn’t help but smile; it was nice to have someone on his side for once.
“How did you get them to let you come here?”
“I told them if they didn’t let me pick where I went, I wouldn’t go at all.” A devious smile spread on his face at the memory of his mother crying and father standing stone faced with his arm crossed as he held up his acceptance letter.
Gon giggled. “What a power move! Were you being serious? Or bluffing?”
“Well, I just kinda went for it during an argument with them and then stuck to my guns when they pushed it further. I hadn’t really thought about whether or not they would actually agree to my terms. If they’d said no I guess I would’ve taken a year off or something to piss them off, and see if that changed their mind. Luckily, they went with it, and they’ve been pretty quiet since I left. I imagine when semester grades start coming out they’ll be calling. They’ll probably also be on my ass when they find out I haven’t declared a law major yet. Or any major for that matter.”
“You should take all the time you need! It’s okay to not have everything figured out just yet.”
Killua looked at Gon for a moment. His amber eyes were burning into him, full of care and concern. Killua felt so seen and it was...really nice, actually. His heartbeat speeding up was kind of annoying, though.
“Yeah, thanks. Hopefully I figure something out soon though, I think it’ll be easier to tell them I’m not pursuing law if I actually have an alternative to present them with.”
“That makes sense. I still think you should be able to take all the time you need to decide. It’s only fair.”
Killua swallowed nervously around the lump in his throat. Those words held so much weight. He certainly had a lot to think about and decide for himself, and not just what his major would be. Time sounded like exactly what he needed. “Thanks Gon.”
“Of course Killua! I’m your friend, and I support you, even if your parents don’t.” He smiled at Killua and then looked away, his face suddenly falling. “You know, it’s funny, you came to college to make your own life away from your parents, and I came to college to get closer to my dad and to shape my life to be like his. Makes me wonder if I'm doing the right thing. It hurt that he wasn't around and I guess that's why I want to follow in his footsteps. I just...I want it to be so great that I understand why it was worth leaving me.”
Killua had no idea what to say, but before he could figure it out, Gon was speaking again, his expression back to normal.
“You mentioned your brother, what’s he like? Is he supportive? Is he happy following in your father’s footsteps?”
He let out a bitter laugh. “Illumi does whatever he’s told, and he doesn’t complain. They like to bring him up a lot when I’m going against their wishes. He’s their perfect son, and life would be easier for all of us if I were more like him. He doesn’t support me or whatever, but to be fair, I don’t talk to him much, so he doesn’t really get the chance to anyway.”
“Is he your only sibling?”
“No, there’s actually five of us. Illumi, Milluki, Me, Kalluto, and Alluka.”
“Wow, that’s so many! I’m an only child, I always wanted siblings growing up.”
“Heh, that’s funny, growing up I always wanted to be an only child.” He laughed, Gon did too, though he looked a bit concerned.
“Alluka is really the only one I can talk to and spend time with.She still listens to mom and dad, she’s younger than me and still under their thumb, but she’s smart and down to earth. She sees through their bullshit and doesn’t buy into the life they push on us. Kalluto is up mom’s ass, and Illumi is up dad’s, and Milluki only cares about their money and his stupid tech start up. So it’s nice to not be alone against them, she always looks out for me, and I do the same for her.”
“I’m glad you have each other! I hate the thought of you all alone against your whole family. Even though I’m sure you could handle it, it’s nice to have someone on your side.”
Killua’s heart flipped in his chest. Ugh, why does that keep happening?
“Yeah, I’m glad we have each other too. I worry about her now that I’m so far away though. I know she can handle herself, but my parents are the worst, and I was always the buffer.”
Gon looked...angry? But he didn’t say anything immediately. He seemed to be mulling things over. “I don’t mean any offense, but your parents sound really mean.”
“I mean, they’re not nice by any stretch, but they don’t hit us or anything. Controlling and judgemental for sure, but it’s mostly cold indifference.”
Gon paused, turning his head to look directly into his eyes. Killua gulped.
“Just because your family didn’t give you much attention or show you kindness and affection, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve those things!” he emphasized his point by squeezing Killua’s hand under the blanket.
Killua’s cheeks were suddenly on fire, no doubt turning bright pink, and he was grateful the only light in the room was from the tv.
“Thanks, Gon.”
He didn’t have the nerve to squeeze back, he also didn’t quite expect the twinge of disappointment he felt when Gon let go of his hand.
After that, they fell into a comfortable silence, the storm was still raging on outside, the bowl of cheese puffs now laid discarded on the floor, and the baking show they’d been watching was entering the semi final. Gon let out a long yawn, stretching his limbs and leaning into Killua’s side.
His proximity fried his brain. He was trying his best to relax, but he felt stiff from head to toe with anxiety. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Gon close to him, it was just so new. When he felt Gon’s head fall onto his shoulder and rest there, he thought his heart was going to beat out of his chest. He was suddenly aware of his breathing and every move he made. He didn’t want to move or do anything to disturb Gon, so he decided the best course of action was to just relax. He focused on calming his breathing, and after a while his heartbeat was a little less frantic, and his body a little less tense.
He wasn’t used to this. Not just the cuddling, but the soft touches on his arm when they spoke sometimes, the hand on his shoulder when Gon was laughing extra hard, or the high fives and sometimes hugs when Gon was excited... It all felt so foreign. But still, as strange as it was to him, he couldn’t help but lean into it. Gon’s gravitational pull was seemingly inescapable.
In this moment, with Gon laying against him, head on his shoulder, it actually felt kind of... nice to be close to someone. He was warm and cozy as their body heat mingled under the blanket, and Gon was soft and solid against him. It was comforting in a way he’d never experienced, and couldn’t quite describe. When he actually let himself enjoy the affection instead of overthinking it, it felt pretty amazing. Without even realizing, he slowly began to let his guard down.
With Gon next to him he was actually distracted from his anxiety thoughts long enough for sleep to creep it’s way in. He felt so secure and comfortable, and it made him a little angry that he was falling asleep, he didn’t want this moment to end. When his eyelids started to feel heavy he knew he couldn’t fight it anymore.
He whispered, “Gon, I’m getting pretty tired, I think I’m gonna head to bed.”
No response.
He tried a little louder this time, “Gon?”
Nothing.
He slowly craned his neck to the side and saw that Gon’s face was slack, and his eyes were closed. He was asleep. His first thought was to gently wake him up so they could head their separate ways and go to bed. But when he tried to move, he just didn’t have it in him. His second thought was that maybe it would be okay to just let himself fall asleep. To let himself fall into the warmth and comfort of the moment, and to let his head gently rest against Gon’s as he drifted to sleep. And so he did.
9 notes · View notes
jawnjendes · 5 years ago
Text
the fog will clear up | shawn mendes
chapter 13/?, university au, shawn x goth oc
AN: sry its short and definitely a filler im sry its boring but it helps build up stuff thatll happen next ok ok im sry
*let me know if u wanna be added/removed from the taglist
masterlist | playlist
Annalise woke with a start. She was wide awake immediately. There was no room for sleepily rolling around the sheets, her eyes weren't heavy like always. She didn't know what dying and coming back to life felt like, but she was pretty sure it felt something like that. She had a weird urge to go for a jog.
Staring at the ceiling, Annalise reached towards the nightstand next to her, intending to grab her phone. Her hand touched the bottle, and she picked it up anyway, reading the prescription label.
Annalise Flores SERTRALINE 50MG TABLET Brand name: Zoloft
"You don't waste anytime, huh?" she murmured before setting it back down. Then, she grabbed her phone and checked the time.
8:47am. A new fucking record. Annalise rolled out of bed, unable to stay still.
In the 2 hours she had to kill before work, she tidied up the dorm, ate a decent breakfast, took a shower, and got started on the course work she had to make up. The energy levels were through the roof, she had never been so on edge and productive at the same time. Why wasn't she put on sertraline sooner? Sure, she felt hyperaware and borderline anxious, but that was apart of the process of getting on a new antidepressant. She was getting things done this way. Sure, she jumped when the lock on the door jiggled, but she was up and running anyway!
If she wasn't, she wouldn't have seen Stella entering the dorm. She was surprised to see Annalise on the couch, looking like a deer in headlights.
"Oh… I thought you were asleep. I'll, uh, I'll come back."
"No, wait!" Annalise sounded a little too frantic, but it did stop Stella from leaving. "Uh, come sit down! Please!"
Stella narrowed her eyes slightly as she went to the couch. At least she was willing to listen.
"I, uh, I'm sorry," Annalise began, rubbing the back of her neck. "I'm sorry for what I said. A stupid guy isn't the only good in my life. I have you. You matter to me, and I'm sorry for making you feel like you don't." She really couldn't stop herself from rambling. "I miss you. I miss seeing you here between classes, and I miss your optimism because a bitch could use some of that. And, and I'm sorry for the negativity I've brought in here. I'm working on it now, I swear. Just… come back. Come home… because bro, you're my wife, dude."
It could have been funny, but there was nothing funny about the way she said it. Her eyes were wide and pleading, and she was rubbing her hands together. Stella merely blinked her hazel eyes, nearly overwhelmed by that string of words.
"Look at you, expressing your emotions," she said after a while. "I can see why you hold it back."
Annalise nodded rapidly. "It's my first day on a new medication. Got me all sorts of hyped up, but I'll mellow out in a couple of weeks. And I'm taking therapy seriously again!"
Stella was surprised. "Oh, I see. Well… I've missed you too. Bro…"
"Bro?"
"I'll come home too. Camila's bed is too small for the two of us."
"Bro…"
"I know. I have to update you on all that."
"Br-"
"Okay!" Stella broke out a smile and stood up. "Dame un abrazo, puta."
That was much easier than Annalise had anticipated. She stood up and hugged her best friend, relieved. Stella wasn't one to hold a grudge, nor was she as stubborn as her roommate. It was another person to cross off the list.
~
Shawn had social media mainly to get his music out there. Yes, he interacted with his friends on Snapchat, and some fans on Twitter. Most of the time, Shawn just tweeted when he had new music coming out. He didn't check any of his social media very often, not even to stalk Ann's accounts because she was rarely on her's. He didn't even have his notifications on, purely to keep himself from the possibility of getting too attached to the opinions of random strangers online.
That was why he woke up that morning to a number of texts from Camila.
"SHAAWWNWNN"
"SHAWN IM LKTERSLLY BALD RN"
"CHEKC UR TWITTER RIGHT NOW!!!!!!"
"YOIR FOLLOWERS!!! AAHSKSKSK"
"SKSKSK SHAWNMM IM SCRAMING"
So to Twitter he went. Shawn rubbed sleep out of his eye as he went to his profile. He had around 10k to begin with, that he built up on his own over the last couple of years. He nearly dropped his phone on his face as he read the new number.
50.2k
"What… the fuck?" he breathed out as he sat up in his bed. He scrolled through the list, making sure this wasn't a series of spam bots.
His mentions were just as wild, and it explained the sudden blow up.
@hollaestor: @shawnmendes hiii bella told me to follow you
@samxriv: @shawnmendes i am free to hang out on tuesday to hang out when i am free
@gisellenjh: @shawnmendes bella sent me here and im glad she did! loving your music!
And there were plenty more like that. There were so many tweets, Shawn couldn't even get through all of them. It was making his head spin. There was only one Bella he knew about too… He just couldn't spell her last name. Thankfully, her handle was just @bellasanti, and it was the first one to pop up when he typed it in the search bar.
Right under Bella Santiago's name and the blue checkmark were the two little words: Follows you. Shawn refreshed the page ten times before it sank in. This YouTuber, who has over 2 million followers, somehow found Shawn's music… and she liked it. She liked it enough to tweet about it… 3 days ago.
@bellasanti: underrated spotify artists: @shawnmendes. give him a listen. send him some love. truly talented guy💖
Shawn had only overheard Bella's videos when Ann was watching them in the other room. He never really watched any of her content. But he wanted to pass out at the fact that she took the time to listen to his music and tweet about him. He wanted to jump on the bed. He wanted to call-
He texted Camila back. "Wtf why did no one tell me sooner?? This is so crazy!!!!!"
"We thought you knew and you were keeping it from us!! LMAO congrats rockstar!"
He couldn't believe it. His follower count was rising. He was getting emails from Spotify saying his songs were being added to many different playlists.
@shawnmendes: @bellasanti wow thank you so much! Love you bella❤
He deleted the last bit before tweeting it. Holy shit. Shawn lied back down on the mattress, completely breathless.
How does someone like Bella Santiago find Shawn out in cyberspace? What Spotify rabbit hole did she go down that led her to him? How many of his songs did she listen to? How many songs did she save to her library? How many of those playlist emails were from her? Shawn had so many questions.
~
There were two things Annalise noticed when she was out on the courtyard after Biology. The first thing was a table on the side of the walkway, with a handmade banner hanging off the front. It read in big letters: Shawn Mendes: Live at The Cameron House. Brian, Alessia. and Camila were all sat on the same side at this table, talking to a student who was interested in the little display.
"The lounge called back," Annalise muttered to herself.
The other thing Annalise noticed was Patrick sitting under a tree nearby, reading a book. She went to him first.
The last time she had spoken to Patrick was when they cut up flowers together. He was never one to explicitly state when something has upset him, and he has seen Annalise in a depressive episode before. Annalise knew him well. Patrick kept his distance because he didn't like the negativity around her, and he couldn't afford any more of it himself.
"Hey," she greeted.
His blue eyes tore away from his book to meet her gaze. "'Sup?"
"Trying to be less fucked in the head," she told him.
Patrick nodded in approval. "Cool."
That was all that was needed for the two of them. Content, Annalise turned and went for the table. A small line had formed when she wasn't looking, so she waited behind the last person. However, with three people running the thing, Annalise got to the front fairly quick.
"Oh, she actually showed up," Brian chimed, amused.
"Meaning?" Annalise asked.
"Thought you were too pissed at Shawn to care about his show, that's all."
She swallowed the pit of annoyance, discovering that even more people knew about that. Brian is his friend, though, of course he'd know.
"Selling tickets or something?" Annalise turned her attention to the two girls.
"Yeah! Ten dollars a piece!" Alessia explained.
"Cool, I'll take one."
Just as she opened the flap on her book bag, Camila spoke up.
"Wait. I'm pretty sure Shawn said he wanted to buy you your ticket himself."
Annalise rolled her eyes. "Well, he's not here and I can do things for myself." She pulled out her wallet and paid her own goddamn ticket.
Camila breathed out a laugh. "Are you ever gonna let him do anything nice for you?"
None of your fucking business.
A new thought occurred to Annalise. "Why are tickets being sold for this show? Aren't his gigs usually free?"
"There's more production going into this one," Brian told her. "The lounge gave him the option to make it a ticketed event, and we need to make back what we already put into it. So now, it won't be a performance, it'll be Shawn's performance."
Shawn already knew how to make an audience his bitch, but…
"Alright then." Annalise shrugged and then accepted her ticket and receipt from Alessia.
The ticket alone was already quite extravagant. There were little red roses designed around the edges. This boy really loved his fucking flowers.
"I'm guessing rose petals will fall from the ceiling or something?" she guessed with a chuckle.
"I was given strict orders to not spoil anything," Brian told her, folding his arms.
The two had a mini staredown until Annalise shrugged again. "Whatever."
Then, Camila piped up again, suddenly excited. "Ooh, Ann did you hear? Bella Santiago followed Shawn on Twitter!"
"She what?" Annalise stupidly replied.
Camila practically squealed. "She gave him a shoutout too! He's blowing up on Spotify! Isn't that awesome?"
Annalise wanted to say something, but her brain wasn't quite caught up yet. So she just walked away.
The other three students watched her leave. Needless to say, they were confused.
"Is she ever gonna be happy for him?" Alessia wondered.
"I think she was excited?" Camila said tilting her head.
"I can't believe Shawn is going through all this trouble for that," Brian said with a scoff.
"I can still hear you!" Annalise called over her shoulder as she kept walking.
All three of them went red in the face, embarrassed. Brian would have made a comment about her being a vampire with supersonic hearing, but he didn't want to be called out again.
_______
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