#anyways it was good to see everybody! and sad to see them all go and more sad to realize that this will happen every year from now on

[coquelicoq]

my sister has me watching this french reality dating show and the subtitles always take a little while to kick in so at the beginning i'm just like mes amis...i do not know what you are yelling at each other...can u fight a little slower...pour moi...un petit ralentissement s'il vous plaît...un peu plus d'articulation...fâchez-vous si vous insistez, mais tranquillement...

[aceascake]

;;

[kanansdume]

I like living in a middle ground where Anakin gets consequences that are a little more meaningful than "he has to live with the knowledge that he done fucked up" but don't go against the concept of the Jedi not going for harsh punishments. Because in the examples with Anakin and Ahsoka, their punishments match their crimes generally. Anakin's a little late to a meeting, it's not that big of a deal. Is it frustrating and irresponsible of him? Yes, but nobody's dead because of it, so the Jedi mostly just ignore it. Ahsoka disobeyed orders out of stubbornness and arrogance, which is a bigger deal and so she does actually have to do something as a result of that, but because she's still learning it's better to let her re-orient herself than to punish her. Ahsoka loses a lightsaber, the best thing to do is to help her find it.

But when you get to the point of Anakin committing whole ass genocides against the Jedi, desecrating their home, helping bring down the Republic, that's not something you can just overlook because at some point he decided that maybe those things weren't such nice things to do. Even if he does end up turning on Palpatine and helping bring down the Empire, it doesn't bring back the Jedi dead. It doesn't take the stench of death and darkness out of their home. It doesn't undo the fact that the Jedi are probably still not safe to just live their lives in the Republic. It doesn't undo the enslavement of the clones (and the crimes THEY have to live with that they aren't even responsible for but that they'll always have to remember as their own choice now ANYWAY). It doesn't undo the pain and misery inflicted upon the other citizens of the Empire. It doesn't undo the torture of the Inquisitors.

That's not something he can fix by spending a day in an Archives re-orienting himself. Nor do I think any of the Jedi would respond that way.

So the middle ground is that Anakin never gets to be a Jedi again because who the FUCK would trust him after that? Even if they forgive him, who would trust him around Jedi younglings again? Who would trust him with any knowledge of where they LIVED if they even have a central place where the Jedi can come together? The middle ground is that Anakin can work to rebuild his relationships with the people willing to give him those chances, but has to accept the relationships he has irrevocably LOST. The middle ground is people like Ahsoka and Obi-Wan being willing to help him find his way again and then walking away afterwards because they can't look at him the same way while they're still alive and their duty isn't TO HIM, it's to the Jedi who are still recovering from his atrocities and to the people of the galaxy who are ALSO still recovering from his atrocities. The middle ground is that Anakin doesn't get to get everything back, even if he is forgiven for the things he's done by the people most important to him.

Anakin gets to have a happy ending of sorts, he can probably get Padme and the twins back because, well, Padme is who she is, but he doesn't get EVERYTHING back. And it's not a punishment, it's just that he broke a shit load of trust and the Jedi are unwilling to make themselves that vulnerable to someone who's proven themselves so willing to hurt them a second time. They're in a place post Order 66 where they don't have the luxury of just letting Anakin back in and assuming they'll be safe. They don't have the luxury of being able to focus on rehabilitating Anakin into a Jedi lifestyle. They HAVE to prioritize themselves because there's so few of them left in a galaxy so extremely dangerous to them now. Anakin's a liability.

And Anakin should have to accept that. Accept that forgiveness doesn't mean everything goes back to the way it was, that his actions will have serious consequences that change things for him. That he's caused a lot of loss and people aren't going to be able to trust him EVER AGAIN. That even if they love him still, he's still going to represent pain and betrayal to the people he cares about more than anything else and it's too difficult to be near him anymore. Anakin should have to figure out how to LET THEM GO for their sake, even if it means he loses them forever.

The whole point of Ahsoka going to the Archives was to learn patience, to re-center herself so that she can understand how she fucked up and not do it again. She's learning a lesson in there, same as she is with Tera Sinube. Anakin's consequences should ALSO force him to learn better, should force him to re-evaluate things to the point that he finally, FINALLY, learns the lessons he should've learned years earlier. Let those consequences force him to learn how to LET THE FUCK GO for once in his entire life.

The choices don't have to exclusively be "he burns in lava" or "he gets back basically every relationship he had before this and gets to be a Jedi AND be married to Padme with kids as if nothing ever happened because living with his choices is painful enough." There's other options in the middle with serious consequences that would be very difficult for him to have to live with as befitting the seriousness of the choices he makes that still allow for a modicum of sympathy towards Anakin and an understanding of the Jedi's willingness to forgive and offer second chances. The options for what Anakin might have to suffer as a result of the awful choices he makes and the realistic reactions people may have to him for the rest of his life even if he changes his mind at some point are limitless.

Even though I love Star Wars and the whole main theme of hope and stuff, whenever I hear about how those close to Anakin would've accepted him back, even after everything he has done, rubs me the wrong way. Maybe I'm not getting the point of it, but to me it feels like when they offer Anakin to come back, to turn away, that there plan is to forget everything Anakin has done and just move on as if nothing ever happened. Like no consequences or anything. Like I said, I'm probably missing the point. But for some reason it feels wrong for him to run away with Padmé or Obi Wan and not face any consequences.

If that's the way you feel, then that's the way you feel! I'm not being sarcastic or throwing any shade about it, genuinely that your feelings on it are valid for you, because that's how stories and art works, that we each have our own reactions and I’m not about to try to talk you out of yours.  Everyone works differently and no person is obligated to feel one way or another. But when it comes to the greater themes of Star Wars, there’s a Howard Kazanjian quote that touches on it: “I said to George, ‘Why? This guy [Vader]—he’s like Hitler. He’s killed. He’s done all of these terrible things and now we’re saying he’s equal with Yoda and Obi-Wan, as if he’s gone to heaven or whatever?’ George pointed to me, he was real close, and he says, 'Isn’t that what your religion is all about?' And, boy, that was like being slapped in the side of the face, because, yes, it is what my religion is all about, and obviously his, but I hadn’t thought it through.—Howard Kazanjian, producer of Return of the Jedi. It’s not specifically about any one religion (especially as the Jedi are Buddhists) but it’s a common theme in many religions (for memory, Buddhism teaches that forgiveness is an end to suffering, which is an important theme with Anakin imo) and it’s not about letting someone get away with something or that there are no consequences, but it’s about not clinging to the past, it’s about not holding onto the anger and hurt because they make you suffer just as much, it’s about how the Jedi don’t strive to punish people, but instead to help them onto better paths. An important distinction to keep in mind here is that consequences and punishment are not the same thing.  Consequences can be “Anakin has to live with the knowledge of what he’s done.”  Consequences can be “Obi-Wan/Padme/Ahsoka can never again look at him and not see the trust he broke, even if he earns it back, even if they will love him through it.”  Consequences can be “They can never have the life they once had ever again.” Punishment is making Anakin suffer for what he’s done, punishment can be a form of consequences, there’s a lot of overlap, but that it’s important to note the two aren’t mutually exclusive and the Jedi have always leaned hard away from punishment that makes people suffer.  (Look at TCW, Anakin does stupid shit all the time and they never punish him, look at Ahsoka messing up and her punishment is working in the Archives, something that’s not meant to make her suffer, just to help her re-orient herself.) In death, Anakin’s last moments were ones of genuine selflessness, that (as Lucas explicitly says) he didn’t care about what happened to himself, he just wanted to save his son, regardless of what that meant for himself, whether he would live or die, whether he would force Luke into what Anakin wanted for him.  That moment isn’t about saying, “Well, then all the other stuff he did no longer matters.”, it’s not about saying that they’re equal, but instead saying that forgiveness is about letting go (one of the core themes of Star Wars), that the Jedi would rather help someone back to the light than to punish them in the dark. When the Force Ghosts offer Anakin the way to preserve himself in the Force, that’s what it’s about, that Anakin turned back to the light and they wanted to help that, they’ve always been about forgiveness and second chances.  To turn Anakin away after a sincere moment of selflessness and desire to turn back to a better path, that’s just not who they are. Now, when I talk about how Obi-Wan or Padme or Ahsoka would have accepted him back while they were alive, that can take on different shades of motivation, to my mind.  The above all still holds true, the Jedi repeatedly offered second chances when they could, but I think it’s also that those characters specifically loved Anakin so much that they would have taken him back even when it was maybe unfair.  Jedi aren’t perfect people, they have their own biases, they have the people they’re closest to, the ones that they would do more for, would pour more of themselves into than others, because that’s how people everywhere work.  And they loved Anakin Skywalker so much that they would forgive the terrible things he did because he’s burrowed his way into their hearts. We never really see what that taking back looks like, whether they were alive or dead when it was offered.  Anakin refuses to turn back for Padme, for Obi-Wan, for Ahsoka.  We don’t know what kind of consequences he would have faced afterwards, but I have a hard time believing that there would have been no consequences.  But the two aren’t mutually exclusive--being willing to accept someone again doesn’t mean you have to sweep everything to the side and pretend it never happened.  (Though, I think it’s fun to play in messy areas of how much would each of them be willing to look past, because they personally don’t want to lose him again, even if it’s not a moral or ethical thing to do?  If Anakin ran away with any of them and avoided punishment, I personally would see that as kind of a deliciously fucked up scenario that’s about how attached they are to him, how they’re willing to let others’ suffering stand because they can’t bear to live without him.  That’s one vein in which I write meta about Obi-Wan or Padme or Ahsoka accepting him back.)(Primarily, though, I’m of the opinion that there would be consequences, just that they wouldn’t be punishment-focused consequences.) When Anakin becomes a Force Ghost, we don’t see what that process is like or if there are consequences of it, we don’t know what his journey is like after that, only that Obi-Wan and Yoda were willing to accept him again and help him preserve himself in the Force. For me, I’m willing to roll with no consequences for Anakin if it means I’m getting other things I like, like I want my baby to be happy, I want shippy fic, I want Jedi reunion fic, etc.  But I do prefer consequences for him--not punishment, but consequences, like what he did is probably never going to be forgotten, they’re forever going to look at him and remember what he did, that he murdered children, that he helped enact genocide on the galaxy, that he helped enslave and torture billions of people.  Forgiveness =/= forgetting. But ultimately I think the Jedi are focused on healing and harm reduction, rather than heaping more punishment onto someone.  Punishing Anakin further wouldn’t gain them anything, they get nothing out of holding onto that anger at him, instead it actively hurts them just as much as it hurts Anakin, because that’s the whole way the Force works, that holding onto anger and hurt = the dark side. They don’t forget, but they do forgive, because that’s the way to end everyone’s suffering.  You don’t necessarily have to agree with that worldview, it’s perfectly fine not to!  Lots of people don’t, it’s normal.  But it’s how these characters view the world in general and Anakin Skywalker in particular, it’s the theme that Lucas wanted for Star Wars.

[nemesyaaa]

ASYLUM AU ! dark!patient!rafe x new!nurse!reader

summary ; everybody warned you about this patient, but you wanted to give him a chance as the new little nurse of the asylum. you just have to feed him nothing more, how can it turn bad ? or maybe your deep hidden secret was that you expected this... ? to be alone for some minutes with him.

warnings : dark content. knife play. violence. smut. sick behavior. mentions of threats. asylum place. mean!rafe. oral (m.receiving.). fear enthousiast. mentions of spit. dubcon. manipulation. agressive behavior. choking. size kink. slight of corruption. rafe being a menace as always.minors DNI. be careful with the warnings. maybe some mistakes too, i'm too dumb.

author's note : i wrote this with a big headache so please, it's maybe a little shitty and i'm sorry. this is strongly inspired by the show " ratched " and not the season of ahs. ngl at first, i wanted to make a mildred!reader but with rafe, it's a bit complicated. anyways !

“i don’t think it’s a good idea to send y/n to deal with rafe. she's still new in the asylum....and rafe? you know how he is, it's not a secret. . he could hurt her. ” said the man who worked with you and obviously who had a crush on you. you didn’t know if it was jealousy or a real sign of affection.

you had arrived at the asylum a week ago, and everyone had been nice to you, the patients and the workers. that's why you were very intrigued by rafe, because you knew he had a difficult connection with all the people here, and only a strict set of people could interact with him. you wanted to know more about him so badly because of the mystery around him. and maybe you were curious about what he looked like after what everyone was saying about this guy.

“shut up, man ! i think it’s a very good idea. ” your colleague said, discreetly giving you a knife, with a smile on her face.

“is he that dangerous? ” you replied, raising an eyebrow.

“you’re so innocent, y/n! ”

“i’m not. it's just that i don't understand the use of this knife. there is enough security i think. ”

nevermind, you were definitely ready. you had waited for this day since you arrived here. it was annoying to see everyone treating you like a baby and making you sit there doing nothing or like an intern giving you the worst chores.

“believe me, you’ll need it. it’s an asylum, everyone’s mad, and you know what? this one guy. " she whispered so close to your ear. "he's the worst of all." and she was gone, leaving you with a nice shiver in your stressed body.

you should hate this place, the nightmares and the problems that haunted these walls. but that's exactly what you came for, ever since you were heard that rafe cameron had been interned in this place, you had done everything to be transferred there he had killed an incalculable number of people, without mercy, without remorse, without regrets and what killed all these people, this sentence. this sadness, made you so curious.

how could a man be so cold and cruel? you needed to know it, see it and feel it.

but you finally saw the light. you had hidden the knife in your lace garter underneath your pretty blue nurse uniform. it was quite short, the skirt going up just below your butt, it was as indecent as it was seductive.

you had to go through several back doors, and deal with security. the guard had given you some advice, and asked you to be careful. you replied politely “can you leave me alone with my patient? i wish it were both of us so as not to rush him. you know he's already in a lot of pain, he's very mad. you don't want to make his situation worse, do you? i ask for the respect of his privacy. ” you had convinced him with your devotion, and kind smile. and you had entered the devil's room without really knowing what you were getting yourself into.

“another new girl? ” a deep, masculine voice had said through the bars of a cell, you could hear the ringing of handcuffs.

“you gotta love scaring them away, rafe cameron. ”

“wrong, sweetheart but nice try. i prefer when they stay. it's more fun when they realize they're stuck with me. ”

“do you realize how sick you are, rafe? ” you allowed yourself to be familiar with him while gathering his meal out of the cart to bring to him.

“you’ll be the one to tell me, y/n. after all, that’s what you’re here for. ” he had no shame, no restraint, and you could feel that he was trying to make you lose control, to upset you, to get on your nerves, and to make you crazy. he was just testing you.

“how do you know my first name? ”

“oh i think your boyfriend likes to say your name a lot when he comes to see me. ”

“i don’t have a boyfriend. ”

you approached to finally discover his face. you expected a monster, a misshapen man, a dark creature but it was none of that. he was a boy with a charming face, a neat hairstyle, and magnificent features. he looked so good physically but you also knew that mental illnesses couldn't be seen on someone's face. but it was as if his own beauty romanticized his perfect madness. reconnecting with reality, you glared away.

“open your mouth. ” you ordered.

with such a sick smile, he replied. “ i really love when my little nurses come to feed me. don't make me waste anything. there's nothing i can't eat here. ” he responded while looking at you, his eyes scanning you, from your breasts compressed in your uniform, to the tiny dress who covered your quivering body.

“i can remove your handcuffs if you promise to behave.”

“ what else, sweetheart? you're the boss, here. ”

“promise me. ”

“you really want to trust me? i wouldn't do that in your place. ” you could tell he was clearly having fun with you. that the more you wasted your time, the more he gained.

“promise me. ”

“ promised. ” he responded gently but there was something so wrong, so bad in his voice.

you had undone him from his handcuffs, and he had grabbed you, holding your body harshly against the bar. you felt pain when your back crushed the cold metal. his hand had circled your neck, completely locking it with his fingers.

“sorry sweetheart, i’m really not good at keeping my promises. and i can't keep my hands to myself with such a beautiful girl in my company, that would be disrespectful, don't you think? don't look at me with those eyes, you wished for it. i can even say that you manifested it because i can't believe you're that stupid or maybe you are. but in this case, let me make you even more senseless. ”

you were short of air and rafe had noticed. you wondered if he was going to kill you, but you remembered that he liked to play. in a false movement, you dropped your knife.

“it’s your lucky day! you won't be the only toy in the party, doll. ”

he had removed his hand from your mouth and while you were trying to catch your breath, he had picked up the knife. he had hooked one of your hands to the bars with the handcuffs. there were tears on your cheeks when the object approached your arm.

“you know you would be even prettier if you let me draw a smile on your face? ”

you shook your head to defend him from doing that. you didn’t want him to hurt you, or feel that sharp thing on you.

“can i give you a new haircut then? wouldn't you like to have shorter hair? don't make those eyes, this knife must be useful to us. your body is betraying you, you should hate it for giving me so many bad ideas. ”

he had cut the buttons of your dress with the knife, revealing your bra with the smooth, shiny surface. “ such a gorgeous thing with pretty parts. he had dragged your uniform to the floor. “you have pretty eyes, too bad they hate me so much. ”

you turned your head when he tried to lick your face, but he didn’t like it. he had violently grabbed your jaw, slamming it against the metal iron, and forcing you to look at him. “i really tried to be nice....ok no, maybe i'm lying, i never tried to be nice to you but i was patient. and now i’m pissed. and guess who's going to have to fix it?”

he licked the side of your cheek, before biting the corner of your mouth, his teeth sunk in your bottom lip. while he sucked his favorite part of your face, he slided his tongue in you, making a rough contact with your throat, his saliva mixed with yours. you moaned against him, freaking out when a bead of blood came out in your widen drippin slit. “ swallow it, sweetheart. 's not gonna kill you. ”. he kissed you intensely, forcing you to swallow the blood and the spit that dropped in your moth, his hand around your hips, pressing his fingers into your skin. he loved to watch the fear in your glossy eyes, watching the fall of your boundaries because of him. you were so nervous, shaking with tense.

“ get on your fucking knees, doll. do something good for me, only once in your fucking useless life.”

surely because of his firm tone and his temperament but above all because of the knife at your throat that threatened you, you had listened to him. you were facing his boner. “i think you’ve already done that. you just have to do it again with me. ” with a speed that had terrified you, he had squeezed your cheeks in his hand, digging them with his fingers. “be careful, sweetheart. i'm not as nice as your boyfriend, dare to put your teeth in, even if it's just a molar, and i can promise you that i would also allow myself to damage you. so, if you want to keep that face intact, you know what you have to do. ”

“ you hurt me!”

“yes, and i love it, doll. the more you complain, the more i will do it.”

suddenly tired of your stupidities, he forced your hands to unzip his pants, and remove his boxers. he was huge. not your usual type. he had opened your mouth which you refused to open with the knife. “try to bite me, and it will be worse. ”

he had pushed his hard cock into your mouth, and without waiting, started making you suck. his large cock occupied your tongue, you breathed hard as he shoved every inch deep, his hand was wrapped around your hair in a brutal grip, tugging fiercely every time you tried to take a break. but the rythm was unbearable, his slippery leaking tip was hitting the back of your throat, and his bulge seemed to grow every time you took him in your mouth. you could feel the drool dripping around his cock, the way your saliva pooled. your lips were swollen and wet, completely abused. his balls sopping wet with your spittle, lazily slapping in a pornographic sound. your mascara was running, your eyes were twinkling.

you could hear him enjoying the show of your downfall because he was the only master of it, his grunts becoming one of the sounds in the room, along with your muffled cries, the smack of his balls in the air, the dull buzzing in your head. everything was happening so fast. “stop. ” he had removed his fat length from your mouth, pressed the tip against your tears before making you suck again. “is my dick better with your flavor, sweetheart? ” you didn’t know if you really hated him. the thing that disgusted you about him, this madness, this attitude, also excited you. you felt strongly giddy.

your panties were immerged, the wetness flowed between your thighs. “ you're supposed to take care of me, but it looks like you need someone to take care of you. ”

you sucked back and forth, your tongue rolled on his big girth. he was painfully hard, and your throat started to hurts. he pushed himself deeper in your mouth, smirking everytime you were about to pass out. when he had finally had enough, he pulled back, taking his penis in his hands, you had chased the trickle of drool between the two of you and sniffling. your cheeks were wet with tears and saliva, everything was mixed in a mess. “ look like your sick patient is feeding you, how do you feel about this, little nurse ? what about your job ? too bad, there are no cameras here, but also pretty lucky for the two of us, nobody can disturb. but soon, the guard security’s gonna check on you because they care a lot about your safety. but i'm curious now, what they will think if they found you without your uniform, but mostly, what will they think about me inside their favorite little nurse ? especially, your sweet boyfriend. it would be so disappointed to see the one he love is not interested because she prefered to be fucked by his ennemy. seems like, you can hurt a lot of people too, sweetheart. ”

you understood why he was locked up differently from the others. he was so manipulative. but also aggressive. he had torn your underwear with the knife. you shivered as you felt the cold metal surface on your skin. you were literally scared, your pulse had accelerated, your breathing too. you weren't a fan of knives but the problem was that the more afraid you were, the more you motivated him to want to hurt you.

“relax” he had said as he placed the knife back against your collarbones, pressing it against your bone. then slided it down your neck, the metal tip lightly stinging your skin. “you know i can’t kill you, doll. i can only torture you. “

that didn't reassure you at all, you preferred that he killed you. as if he had read your mind, he replied. “you should be more scared of what i can do to you than what the knife could. i will hurt you better. ”

he had moved the knife to your stomach, then to your wet pussy. “there’s more than just fear from what i see. and you can't deny it. " he continued, sliding the sharp object at your entrance.

“ please, rafe ! not in…i-i-i-m begging you ! ”

“ you beg ? so sweet. but do you know what ? i don't care, honey. ”

“ you…i'm sure…i mean, you're not that sick ! please…”

“ if you say please once again, i'm pretty sure i can cum between your legs. ”

the tip of his knife had caressed the inside of your sloppy cunt. “don’t worry, i won’t go any further. ” he withdrew the knife, and licked the blade. “i fear, everything is sweet about you, pretty nurse. now, spread those legs for me. ”

“we can't do that, the guard is right next door! he can hear everything and imagine if he comes” you started to panic. with a mocking tone, he replied “for the time, i can handle it but for the noise, it's on you, sweetheart. do you think you can do that ? don't answer, i don't fucking care at all because i will fuck you in any case. ”

“you shouldn't do that, it's really bad, you might regret it! ” you tried to stop him, but the knife hit your throat. “don't try to escape something that's going to happen, it's a waste of time. and i hate it. ” he lost his patience and opened your legs with one hand, she was big and strong enough to control you on her own. he had slightly moistened his cock before going inside of you.

“ one move, one scream or one fucking bite and i will rip your throat, got it ? ”

you nodded, and his thrusts started to get rougher, he pounded you deep in your stupid little cunt, hitting the spot with no mercy. you wanted to shout but the knife was clearly too close to do anything stupid. you bitten your own lips, a drop of blood dripped in your mouth. he smacked your ass a couple of times to the point you felt the bruises and the pain quickly. his teeth were on your shoulder, leaving marks. it was painful, but you don't wanted to be a crybaby. you held back your tears, while he crushed you against the metal.

he stretched you to your limits and you barely held back a cry. he smiled before covering your mouth with your underwear. his body was sweaty, you could see the sweat sheen his body. your body slammed against his, and against the bar. he had pushed your thong between your lips but also his fingers which you sucked with enormous devotion, you licked every inch of his skin, you covered them with drool, you made them completely soaked. he eventually added a lot of his spit. you must have looked like nothing at all. you were even less credible in your role of nurse. he was no more groans as he reached your first orgasm, but more desperate whispers, quick back and forth in your uncontrollably leaked swollen cunt, as his eyes were all over your face. his dick was harder because of seeing you with his fingers and your panties stuffing perfectly your slutty mouth.

he lifted up your leg to watch himself getting buried inside your walls. “ i'm afraid that now you can't deny that this pussy is mine. ” he said, removing your thong from your mouth.

“ i'm not y-yours...rafe ! ”

“ i fear it will be against your will then, sweetheart because your fucking cunt really like me. ”

he grabbed your face, forced you to look at your messy part. “ still deny, fucking slut ? you really want me to pull that knife inside. ”

again, you shook your head.

“say it. you know your words. ”

“this pussy is yours, only yours! ”

he plowed you for a long moment, and you can't even think anymore. you were too dumb, too dizzy. your head spinned, and your body only moved because of him pounding retlessenly. you squirted a lot, you splashed a little on him but it was nothing unlike him. when he came, it had gushed into your pussy, the thick and white loads filled you, while his sweaty and heavy balls emptied inside you.

“ sweetheart, you're really my favorite nurse. don't forget to tell the director how mean i was to you. ”

“ why did you cum in me ? ”

“ for any inconveniences, you can tell the director. she will be glad to know how i fuck all her little nurses. and you're not an exception. ”

“ what if i'm pregnant ? ”

“ you're so naive. pregnant or not, nobody's gonna forgive you for that sin. ”

“ i'm leaving. ”

“ don't forget the knife, you know how to play with it now. ”

“ i hope you will stay here forever.”

“ you can pray for it, sweetheart but i fear god doesn't listen to sinners. ”

i wanted to tysm @dark-fics-4-you and @bunnyrafe for helped me with this one. <333

[nisuna]

Need more yuuji smut!!

So hear me out-

bestfriend!yuuji finding your depressed ass in the park while it's raining and you're soaked. So he takes you home and take care of you and puts you to sleep in jis clothes.

Then wakes you up by eating you out and then .. you know.. the rest of the stuff

Holy shit am I in my angst era? 😭 Yuji is 100% my comfort character, so this was very nice to write. He's so boyfriend oml I love him so much<3 I don't even care if this does well or not. I really needed this, tysm for the idea!!<3

⚠️ If you or anyone you know struggles with their mental health or has thoughts like these, please look up your local s*uic*de prevention hotlines. Everybody deserves to get help, and everyone deserves to live. It might not always be as easy as in my little story, but please look after yourselves, I love you all so much and thank you all for all of the love and support🫶🏻 As someone who's been struggling with their mental health ever since their early teens I can say that I definitely can't speak for everyone on this matter, but maybe some will find comfort and familiarity in this

TW: angst, s*icid*l ideation, mentions of declining mental health, hurt and comfort, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, cream pie, body worship, nipple play, body appreciation, mating press, confession, a lot of crying, this is so dear to my heart, supportive!bff!yuji

~2,8k words~

<3masterlist<3

--------mature themes ;strictly 18+ MDNI-----------

Everything has been fucked lately. Your job sucks, school isn't going great, your social life is almost nonexistent, your family is a mess and you just want some peace and calm. You've been home constantly, but you just can't stand it anymore, which is exactly why you went outside for some fresh air. And as if the universe was giving you the middle finger as well, it started raining. But you just couldn't be bothered anymore. Life sucks and your mental health is declining. So you don't even flinch at the rain hitting your lowered head. You don't care that your clothes are soaked at this point. You just sit there and take it. You've been sitting here for what feels like hours. There has been multiple nosy on lookers that passed by mumbling. Some of them showed concern, but some of them were threw disgusted looks at you and assumed you're some kind of junkie that's loitering around in their peaceful park. You couldn't care less, nobody was actually brave enough to approach you anyway, so you let them talk.

It's getting cold, but you can't bring yourself to move. You're soaked and it's getting dark, but you feel like you have nowhere to go. You're starting to feel numb, your hands and feet are cold and you almost can't feel them anymore. This is actually quite nice, you're neither sad nor mad, you feel empty, but it's not uncomfortable like it usually is. You feel calm, you're not worried. You think that freezing to d*ath might actually be a good way to go. It would be like falling asleep without having to ever wake up again. For the first time in weeks you felt yourself smile. You've made up your mind, nobody will miss you anyway so why bother. But as you were about to lie down, you heard a familiar voice screaming your name.

"What the hell-", you thought to yourself as you sat back up and looked around. You didn't have to wait long before seeing a familiar figure run towards you.

"Y/N!!! Where are-? Oh my god there you are. I looked everywhere for you. What are you doing?", he reached out to grab your shoulders, only for you to flinch away.

"Yuji, what are you doing here?"

"Well, you weren't picking up my calls and I got worried." When you didn't give him an answer, he continued, "Are you alright? Whoa you're soaked and my god you're ice cold c'mon let's get you home. I don't want you to get sick.", he grabbed your hand, trying to get you off that bench. But you didn't budge.

"Y/N? What's wrong c'mon let's go-"

"No, I'm fine, really. Just leave me be."

"What are you even saying? How could I? You are in no condition to be left alone. It's freezing and you're soaked c'mon let's go home-"

"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE GODDAMN IT!", you screamed and felt tears leave your eyes. Shit. When you reached up to wipe away at your eyes, Yuji stopped you and wiped your tears with his sleeve instead.

"Y/N I don't know what's going on, but please let me help.", he knelt down, squeezing your trembling hands and giving you a warm smile.

"Why do you care so much?", that came out way too wobbly for your liking.

"Why do I care? Y/N, you're my best friend of course I care. How could I not? Look at you."

You were at a loss of words, so he continued. "Is it okay if I touch you more?" Nod. As soon as you gave him the okay he pulled you into a tight hug. It took you a bit to relax, but you eventually gave in and let your emotions run wild. You were shaking, crying loudly in his embrace. All the built-up tension of the past weeks came flooding out, but he was there to catch you. He held you close as you let go. He didn't say a word until you calmed down a bit.

He pulled away to take a look at your puffy face. "Let's go over to mine, hm? What do you say?"

"Fuck it.", you thought as you nodded and got up.

"Want me to carry you?"

"No, that's embarassing. I can walk alright.", you huffed.

"Don't worry, it's late. Nobody will see."

"Okay."

After he wrapped you up in his jacket, you got on his back and let him carry you to his apartment. He's so warm and smells really good. You subconsciously nuzzled your face closer to him. Falling asleep like this would be way nicer than alone. You thought of that as you closed your eyes and hugged him tighter.

Luckily, he only lived a couple blocks away from the park. He was gentle when he set you down as soon as you arrived.

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it.", there it was again, his sweet smile. "You should go take a bath before you get sick. I'll lend you some of my clothes." Nod.

------

You felt like a new human being after the warm bath. His clothes were also warm and smelled like him. It was oddly comforting. Has he always smelled this good? Your thoughts were interrupted by a soft voice.

"Oh wow, you look better already.", he grinned.

"Yeah", you cracked a smile back at him, "I do feel a lot better. Thanks a lot."

"Of course! Now, what do you want to eat, you must be starving? How long were you out there anyway?"

"All day actually...", you confessed.

His shocked expression made you giggle as he pushed you into his kitchen.

After a good meal he said you could go sleep in his bed. He'd sleep on the couch tonight. But you stopped him. "I don't want to be alone. Can you sleep with me tonight."

"Sure, I thought you needed some space and didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Can we cuddle too?"

"We can do whatever you need."

That's how you found yourself back in his arms for the nth time today. The atmosphere was calm, as you were exchanging occasional remarks while watching something. You don't know what overcame you, but you just felt so safe and taken care of that you leaned in for a kiss. However, you quickly pulled away when you felt him stiffen up and not kiss you back.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. God, I'm so stupid. You probably hated that. Shit, please don't hate me-"

"No, please calm down, it's alright. It's not that I don't like this. It's just..."

"Just what?"

"You're in a very fragile state right now. I don't want you to do something you might regret."

"But I'm sure, I really want this-"

"Sleep it over. Just one night and if you still feel like it tomorrow I'm down. I'm here for you. We can cuddle all you want, though. I just don't want to take advantage of you."

You shot him your biggest pity pout and when that didn't work you gave in. "Alright, alright, I guessss.", you huffed and fell into his embrace. Both of you didn't talk much after that, there was a bit of tension, but you didn't act on it. When you finally drifted off to sleep it was enveloped in his warmth and smell.

You haven't slept this well in a long time. And you definitely haven't been woken up this nicely in a long time, either.

After such a good night's sleep you didn't expect to wake up to your best friend between your thighs, lapping away at your pussy.

"Hi, good morning", he rasped, morning voice heavy. "You just looked so cute wiggling around in my arms and when I checked you were already so wet down there. Sorry, I couldn't resist.", he said while softly kissing up your thigh.

"It's alright, let me wake up first, though ah-", you couldn't finish your sentence, because your head snapped back with a moan, as he dove back between your legs.

"Sorry, but I need this just as bad as you do. You taste so good. God, I've been missing out on this this whole time? Just lay back and let me take care of you."

You couldn't say no. Not that you were able to say anything at all with his skillful tongue and fingers working your cunt open. He made you a whimpering and sensitive mess in a matter of a few seconds.

"Shit, how are you so good?", you let out a drawn-out moan, but didn't get an answer from him. His actions spoke instead of him, as he had you cumming on his tongue soon after. Once he licked you clean he slotted his body between your legs and kissed you nice and deep.

"Mmh", you moaned against his lips, tasting yourself on his tongue.

"Tastes good, right?", he grinned.

"Shut up", you playfully hit his chest, grinnig right back at him.

"Alright, my turn.", you smiled, trying to get him to lie down only to be pushed back, as he got on top of you again.

"Nope."

"Hey! Not fair, I wanna taste you, too.", you pouted at him.

"Maybe next time. Today's all about you, I don't want you to lift a single finger. As I said, lay back and let me take care of you."

That was an offer you definitely couldn't refuse. So you gave him a nod and waited for his next move. His next move was a very welcome one, as he finally rid him himself of his shirt. You always knew he was well built from years in the gym and other sports. But seeing him like that up close made you gush. His front was mouth watering, and his arms were to die for. He was huge. You would've rubbed your legs together to ease your pain if he wasn't keeping your legs open with his body between them. You didn't even notice you were staring until he spoke up.

"You're practically drooling."

"Fuck, sorry.", you shrieked looking away.

"Don't sweat it. Oogle me all you want, I dig it.", he smiled, pulling your face back in his direction.

"Can I touch you?"

"What kind of question is that? Go for it!"

His skin's so soft, but the ripples of his abs and chest are brick hard. He let you explore his body before grabbing your hand and giving it a gentle kiss.

"My turn.", he whispered against your fingers before pulling your shirt up and exposing your tits. Your nipples were already hard from all of the stimulation earlier.

"Fuck, they're so pretty.", he whispered, grabbing one in each hand and giving them a hard squeeze.

"Shit.", you moaned, back arching off the bed and pussy rubbing against his hard cock. To make matters worse, he leaned down, licking a thick stripe up your neck and pinching your aching nipples between his fingers.

"Off. Now.", he demanded, already helping you pull the shirt over your head. You were finally fully exposed and he ate it right up. He leaned back down, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and massaging your other breast. He made sure to pay equal attention to both. It felt really good, but you were getting impatient, already grinding against his hard crotch.

"Yuuji~~", you moaned at a particularly hard suck. "Don't tease. Pleasee, I need you.", you whined.

"Shit, sorry I got distracted. Wait here, I'm gonna go get the condoms."

Before he could leave you, you stopped him.

"No, wait, please don't. I want to feel you.", you said, already digging your nails in his arms at the mere thought of doing it raw.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive.", you smiled reassuringly.

"Fuck, alright. Got it.", he swore and rid himself of his boxers.

Once again you were staring. He was bigger than you thought. You definitely couldn't wait any longer. You needed him inside of you immediately.

He didn't make you wait long before he started to slowly bottom out. Your moans grew embarassingly louder with each inch that filled you up.

"Shit, you're so tight. Please loosen up, you're gonna kill me."

"Sorry, it just feels so good.", you mewled back arching and pressing your soft tits against his hard chest. "Kiss me, please~~" He immediately obliged, crashing his mouth against yours. It was so raw and messy when your tongues kept mashing together, but it just felt so right.

"I'm gonna start moving now. I'm gonna fuck you so good."

You nodded and pleaded. Your wish was his command, so he finally picked up his pace. And god, was he good with his hips. With each thrust and shift of your legs, he kept hitting you deeper and deeper until you practically saw stars. It's so cliché, but you felt like you were in heaven.

Your nails kept grazing his broad back and shoulders, but you didn't want to hurt him, so you held back. As if he had read your mind, he leaned down and whispered against your ear.

"Do it. Mark me up, it doesn't hurt. Please don't hold back."

So you didn't hold back anymore. You let your emotions run wild, exploring his body with your hands. Shyness long forgotten, as you left long red streaks all over his back, occasionally pulling him down for a kiss.

The world stood still. You never noticed before, but he has always been there for you. He was the only person that you ever felt loved by. How had you never noticed. Even if you two never said it out loud before, you loved each other. It had to be love. You felt overwhealmed as his fingers slipped between your bodies and started rubbing thick circles in your sensitive clit. Your breath hitched as the words you kept secret for far too long came tumbling out.

"I love you, Yuji. I love you so much, thank you for always taking care of me. I only have you in my life. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much. Please never leave me, I need you."

If he was taken aback by your words, he didn't show it. He just pressed his lips against yours and kept rubbing and moving his hips until you came undone. And as you were moaning and arching your back, he finally answered.

"I love you, too. So, so much. I always have. I promise I will never leave. No matter what happens, I got you. Forever.", that's when the dams broke down and tears were spilling from your eyes. You just hugged him close and thanked him.

Not long after, he was reaching his limit as well. So he hoisted your legs over his shoulders and pounded away until he filled you up to the brim. All the while he was kissing your tears away and saying how good you were for him and how well you did.

When his hips finally came to a halt, he gently put your legs down and kissed you again. He was gentle when he pulled out and you winced as you felt his cum drip out of you and onto his sheets.

Immediately after, he pulled you close, hugging you like he was about to lose you and you were able to calm down a bit. But the bad thoughts came back as you whispered against his skin.

"Today was so stressful and you must've been worried sick. What if I have another breakdown. I don't want to be a burden. I don't want to stress you out. I don't want to break your heart if anything happens to me."

"Y/N, look at me.", he begged, hands on your cheeks.

You finally looked back up at him, tears stinging your eyes.

"You're not a burden.", he whispered, giving your forehead a gentle kiss. "I will protect you forever. For as long as I live, I will always be here to catch you. No matter what happens. You're not alone anymore. You don't have to endure everything silently and on your own. I promise, things will get better. I will be here each step of the way. I love you so much, so please don't leave me."

You wanted to believe him, you wanted to get better. Maybe you finally could with his help. It's a big gamble, but you're gonna bet all of your cards on this relationship. After a long pause, you gave him a silent nod and burried your face in his chest, all while he was gently patting and kissing your head.

Life and everyone else might be shit, but at least you got him now. He was worth living for.

--------

If you read this far, thank you so much<3 I hope I can make some lighter and happier content soon, but I'm on a roll right now *sigh* Please stay healthy and look after yourselves, mwah

Hope to see you all very soon<3

[bugboysgf]

Me?

Summary: You transfer to KISS for the the semester to be closer to Kitty but somebody catches your  eye….

AN: I just finished xo kitty an hour ago and looked on tumblr for fanfics but i couldn't find any so i wrote one myself. (kinda rushed so don't judge)

“Okay we should share this room together” you look up from your phone to see Kitty sitting on the bed.

“Okay cool.” you huffed. You were so nervous you've  never been miles away from your home before.

“Be happy your parents let you go this semester, it's a big deal.”

“I know…. I just don't speak Korean and I'm here. You've been here for one Semester already and you basically know everybody I transfer in the middle of the year.”

“But you were sad that you couldn't come to korea with me and my family now you are here coming to school with me.'' Kitty tried to get you to look at the bright side.

“Okay fine, so when can I meet your friends?” you asked

“Right now actually I'm pretty sure Min Ho, Q and Dae are at the dorm. You already met Julianna and yuri.” she grabs your hand and leads you to the boys dorms.

Your heart was beating the whole time, you had trouble making friends at school. Last semester you were all alone. Kitty was in Korea and she was your only friend. You were happy that you could be together now.

Kitty opens the door of the dorm and you both walk in.Then three pairs of eyes were on you. You kept your head low avoiding eye contact.

“Kitty! Your back!” a guy with curly hair hugs her. When they stop hugging he looks at you.

“Q this is y/n.”

“Hi nice to meet you.”

“Hi” you gave him a small smile. You notice another guy hugging her and you could tell who it was straight away, it was Dae.

“Good to see you in person and not a photo.” he smiles.

“Good to see you too Dae.” you said

“Please tell me you're not annoying like kitty is.” you look at the guy talking, he must be Min Ho, he's the only one you haven't met.

“I- l- don't think i am?” you say more as a question. The first thing you noticed was how attractive he was, you knew you couldn’t like him, you promised not to focus on boys. You look at a Kitty and you can tell she's on it already. She knows, she always knows.

“One thing I can say for certain is that you're prettier than a Kitty.” he looks at the Kitty with a shit eating grin.

“Haha, so funny.” Kitty glared at him “and don't flirt with my friend.'' Kitty flicks him off as he walks back to his room.

“He wasn't flirting with me” you came to his defense.

“He definitely was.” Q said.

“Sadly she doesn't know what flirting is, the last guy that flirted with her she said he was being nice but he was checking her out and telling her how pretty she was!”

“He was just being nice!”

—-

It wasn't a secret that you knew nothing about guys or how to talk to them. The only thing you knew about love was reading Harry Styles fanfics in the 6th grade. But Kitty knew everything she was a love expert and she only had one boyfriend. She makes you believe that the right one could be anywhere you just have to believe.

“Okay i'm ready.” you came out of the room. Kitty looks at you and frowns.

“Yea no. You are not wearing that.”

“What's wrong with it?” you look down at your outfit. You thought it looks good for the welcome back party.

“Did you forget that Min ho is going to be there? You can't show up with that on. You need something that makes a statement.”

“I've only said like three words to him, he doesn't like me.”

“Oh trust me he does, i've never seen him look at somebody like he does with you. Now change into this.” she hands you one of her dresses. You hold it up in the air, you couldn't say no to kitty she doesn't take no for an answer anyways.

—

“I can't believe I'm wearing this and I look good.” you said fixing your dress.

“Told you. He's here…look!" Kitty pointed to Min ho. “I'm going to leave now” Kitty got up from her seat when Min ho started walking towards you.

“Kitty what, no.” you tried to stop her while she was already walking away. You started to panic how were you going to talk to this attractive guy, that is way out of your league.

“Is anybody sitting here?” Min Ho said.

“Here? Oh no. no one. Sit.” you said a little too quickly, you were shaking your leg to try to calm down.

“Are you okay?” he put his hand on your thigh, you didn't answer, you looked at his hand on your thigh then looked back up at him. Your eyes were wide, heart beating faster than it was before.

“Oh sorry” he took his hand off of your thigh “So why did you come to kiss?” He continue talking like nothing happened.

“To be closer to Kitty she's like my only friend and also she said it was nice here so…”

“I mean it is, if you ever want me to show you around i could.” he offered. You shook your head and laughed. “What is it?” you could tell he was sort of offended.

“Nothing Kitty just told me you were a pain in the ass, but you're actually nice.”

“Of course, nice to pretty girls like you.” he smiled. Kitty told you that he thought he was the hot shit, and you hated that in guys but for some reason you just found yourself attractive to him.

“Thanks, you're not too bad yourself.” you nudged him

—

2 weeks later

“First A+ of the semester.” you danced with kitty.

“And we did it together.” kitty said “hows you and Min ho by the way, you haven't been talking about him”

“Nothing, I think we are just friends but I don't really know when somebody likes me.”

“I see it he definitely does just go for it i mea-” kitty stops talking when she sees you looking  at a text on your phone “your smiling it's him!”

“I have to go tutor Min ho bye.” you grab your backpack and open the door.

“Remember what I said!” Kitty yells.

“I will!”

—

“Done” Min ho hands you a paper. You look at the paper and realize most of the answers are wrong.

“Min ho you forgot to subtract.” you told him, you've been telling him this for the last 3 days and he keeps forgetting.

“Sorry I keep getting distracted.”

“Is it your phone? Turned it off.” you reach for his phone but he grabs it before you can.

“No it's this girl.”

“A girl?” you look up at him not sure what to say next.

“Yes this girl, i want to ask her on a date but i'm not sure if she likes me. She gives me mixed signals. What should I do?” he asks.

“Oh um.” you know right now you need to not sound jealous. “Just ask her out, if she says no then she's missing out.”

“Alright… will you go out with me?” you look at him stunned.

“Me. why?” you say confused you're not sure what to say, nobody has ever asked you out before.

“Because I like you.” He says like its so obvious.

“Me?  You like me? Is this a prank?” you look around to see if people are looking at you but nobody is.

“No? Why would it be a prank? Do you not like me back?” “I do.. I've just never been on a date before.” you confessed.

“Then i'll be your first.” he smiles and holds your hand.

[obsessedhoneycomb]

Her

George Russell x fem!reader

Summary: being stood up by your fiancé a week before the wedding is something woman doesn’t want to go through in her life, ever

Warnings: nothing special maybe heartbreak, break up, curse words, cheating, no use of Y/N, one use of L/N

A/N: I really love Sex and the City movies, so this is basically inspired by the events from the first movie. My English is sometimes hot or not, so I’m sorry for any mistakes! Please don’t use my writing without my consent, also I don’t own any of the pictures! Enjoy.

“There’s no possible cancellation, miss. You need to come to the honeymoon vacation or it’ll expire.”

Yes, the word honeymoon. Woman without a man. The man who stood her up week before their wedding. It was all perfect, everything about their love. And yet, here she stood, single, heartbroken and humiliated in front of the suite for newlyweds that carried their names Mr. and Mrs. Russell. Out of all the girls from the grid family, Kelly was the one to be there for her. She packed her up and got her on this vacation, because she already payed a lot for this to be a surprise for George. One that he’d never forget, one with which she’d shown him how she loved him.

For two days straight she only slept. Kelly fed her a little with some fruits and yogurt from breakfast. It was painful to watch her close friend to suffer like this. She looked pale, her face puffy from all the crying, and her gaze was dull.

As the night fell on the resort in Mexico, Kelly picked up her phone, Max was FaceTiming her.

“Hey, babe. How is it going?” He asked with frown.

“Hey, love… please, promise me, that if you ever want to break up with me, don’t you dare to propose to me before that.” Kelly said in sadness.

“How is she?”

“It’s bad. She’s sleeping for second day already. You should see her face when she saw the name tags on the door… it was like a punch in the gut.”

“I’m really glad, that you’re there with her, Kells. She deserves the best. I must’ve restrain myself very hard to not punch George when I saw him at the paddock today.”

“Wait, what? He’s back at racing? I thought that he was supposed to get a break from all that stuff, like he said to her.”

“Don’t say it to her, but… There’s this woman with him here, like a shiny bracelet on him. Lando nearly threw up from the sight of them and everybody here is giving him a silent treatment.”

“Holy shit… this is a nightmare.”

“Yeah… keep her away from socials, she doesn’t need more heartbreak than she already received.”

“No probs, babe. I’ll keep her occupied and her phone is with me anyway and it’s turned off.”

“Okay, I’ll keep you posted. Take care, love you.”

———

Fourth day into vacation she got up from bed, surprising Kelly at the terrace for breakfast.

“Hi, K.” She said, her voice raspy from all the sleep.

“Ah, the sleeping beauty. How are you today, darling?” Kelly hugged her instantly.

“It’s strange, but good. I think the most of the hurt is gone. I know it’s not that simple, but today is good and I’m gonna enjoy it.” She softly smiled but her eyes spoke another story. Kelly gave her a sympathetic look as they talked through the breakfast.

“Max is wishing you well. He’s so worried about you.” Kelly said sipping on her coffee.

“Aw, thanks. He’s a good man, Kelly.” She smiled kindly with little sigh.

“Hey, don’t let your mood flatten, we’re here to have a good time, you’ve worked hard for this. So, we’re gonna make the most of it.” Kelly said with amused smile.

And they did. Girls nights, partying a little, spending afternoons at the pool and beach, some trips around the resort too. Two weeks went by like a click, when they stood at the airport waiting for Max’s private jet.

It was also first time after that weeks of freedom when Kelly gave her her phone back.

“It’s time to go back to reality and I know it’s gonna be hard, but we’re gonna do this. Don’t get those things get to your head. You’re you and you’re the most amazing human in this world.” Kelly reassured her.

She turned on the phone with her stomach churning. Millions of notifications of messages, emails and tags. In the tons of photos at the socials she noticed that one photo, that George posted. She felt like she’s gonna throw up. All the sickness was back, the pain in her chest too.

“Mi amore. Love you to the moon and back.”

George and his new girlfriend. She was so pretty, like a doll. And god, how he was glowing.

As they boarded the plane, Kelly noticed the turn in the her mood as she slipped her phone to her bag.

“I guess you found out, don’t you?” Kelly asked with frown.

“Y-yeah. I don’t know what to say, it’s driving me insane. And he’s back at racing, he just… he’s a fucking liar.” She was at the rage stage.

“It’s gonna be okay. We‘ll manage.”

———

And it was true. Kelly managed to get a people to pack her things out of their shared apartment with George, the first day they went on that vacation. She didn’t want to stay in Monaco, she wanted to go back home to London, where her flat was for rent. She was lucky that it was free in the moment.

Getting from the Heathrow airport was like a blur, feeling all the nostalgia from the surroundings and memories of her past life were everywhere. But it didn’t hurt as much as when she finally unlocked the door to her apartment, getting in the known scent and looking over the boxes there and there. All her life packed like it meant nothing. She was in no mood to start unpacking, because she was afraid to untangle the suppressed emotions. It was a job for her in the next months.

———

It was like six months after the called off wedding. She shut down her socials, getting herself a fresh start with private profiles with a few people following on them. Her main public profile was still up, she didn’t post any new photos, the last post there was a photo of her tasting the sweet cake for wedding with caption wedding vibes #therussells.

She turned her attention to the direction of self love, reconnecting with her old friends in London and little bit of vacations and mainly work. Her going to the Monaco was absolute no go, so when someone from her grid friends wanted to see her, they needed to visit. But they were more than glad. Nobody talked about George, it was her strict rule number one. She practically erased him from her life and mind.

Life just has a strange ways to make things a little crazy.

Sunny morning in London, she went to the café for her morning coffee. She liked to try new places. As she was on the phone working already, she ordered a waited for the cup of hot love.

George sat in the corner of this café, looking through the newspaper like a classic English gentleman. His life turned upside down for the last six months. He was now reminiscing all the things he had done and how he hurt people around him. Brushing another feeling of shame off of him, he looked up from newspaper and his eyes found her standing at the order counter. It was like some nasty dream, ripping his heart apart for another time. She stood there, talking over phone, smiling with her classy appearance. Thinking about the way he wanted to approach her, he tried not to look suspicious. He was the one, who made her life hell, betrayed her the worst.

She slid her phone to her purse, got her coffee and turned around to get out of the café, when she spotted George already staring at her. She was so taken aback by seeing him, that she bumped into the glass door. Hard. Feeling her head spinning and the blood running from her nose, coffee was everywhere on her skirt. People around her was at her immediately, helping her, but she was in some kind of trance.

“Excuse me, please. I need to get to her. Hey, are you okay?” George got through the crowd to her, his protective persona on, getting his white napkin to wipe her bloody nose.

“I-I’m not…” she said still in shock.

“I’m going to take you to the hospital, you may have broken nose.” George frowned in guilt because his presence caused this.

She only nodded, there was no place for denying it. George gave her reassuring squeeze to her shoulder and guided her to his car, which was parked outside on the street. Feeling his hand on her back and on her arm felt strange.

Ride to the hospital was quiet. She held the napkin at her nose, blood was slowly stopping pouring, and she was staring in front of herself, still processing what just happened. She felt her anger rising in her, how dare he shows in her life now, when she’s been on the good way of healing her wounds.

“Why are you here?” She mumbled slightly wincing in pain.

“There’s race in Silverstone this weekend.” He said taking the last turn to parking lot at the hospital. As he stopped the car, she put all her strength to get out from the car without his help.

“You can go, I’m gonna take care of myself.” She took quick steps towards the hospital.

“Wait! I’m not gonna let you handle this alone. I caused this, so let me take care of it.” He ran after her, softly grabbing her arm.

“At least please just don’t touch me, George.” She got out of his grasp still walking.

They were waiting for doctor to see her, while George wrote down the application for her. He stopped at the column about family status. Flagging it as married, he hoped that he would get access to information about her condition. She just signed it off not caring about anything. Her phone rang, it was Kelly. Oh god, they were supposed to meet today.

“Hi, Kells. I really can’t talk right now.” She tried to talk coherently but her lips started to get swollen from the crashing to the door.

“You sound weird, are you okay?” Kelly asked in concern.

“Yeah, I just bumped into the door at the café, hard, that I might have broken nose. I’m currently at the hospital.” She sniffled a little blood.

“What?! I’m getting there, we’re already in London!”

“No, no! Actually I’m not here alone.” She looked up at George.

“You’re full of surprises, girl. Is that the new man, you’re seeing?”

“No, it’s not him. It’s George.”

George was listening to her conversation and pinpointed the word him. Is she seeing someone new? Is she in love with him?

“Holy shit, what the fuck?!”

“Calm down, K. I can’t talk right now, all you need to know, that I’m okay. I’m gonna text you, bye.”

She sighed putting her phone to her purse.

The awkward silence between them lasted for a while.

“Is there- are you-“ he started to ask but it came out as a blurt.

“I’m not seeing anyone, if that’s what you want to ask. I’m just tired of questions if I’m still single, so I said to my friends that I’m working on my dating life. So no. I can’t love anyone after what you’ve done to me and you have this sick luck of hurting me still.” She said with sad sigh.

“I’m sorry.” He said plainly.

That was words she wanted to hear from him all this time. She met his gaze full of guilt.

“I’m so so sorry. I was just stupid and foolish, I really didn’t care about things I had around me, in my life. I was so ungrateful. And I hurt the most precious thing in my life. You. No words can mend the wounds I caused. I just want to make it up to you, so bad.” His eyes was glistening with tears as he talked sincerely.

She processed all the words he just said. Her heart broke again, but now for him. For the way how he talked, how he was honest. After that months of silence between them and his lies from the last conversation they had together.

“I forgave you. A while ago. I just didn’t understand those lies you told me. About you taking a break from everything we shared together, that it drowned you. And then I saw that post on the socials, you back at track with her.”

George felt pang in his chest, he was deeply ashamed of his actions. Before he could say anything else, nurse peeked from the doctors office calling her inside. She stood up and George assisted her.

“You’re her husband right? You can come inside too.” Nurse politely smiled.

She wanted to protest but George interrupted her. “Yeah, I am. Thank you.”

After getting some scans and check up, doctor said, that she doesn’t have broken nose, just little bruised and that in few days the swelling would be gone same as bleeding.

George took her to her apartment, helping her with everything she needed. Sitting on the couch with cup of coffee in her hands, he was in process of putting the cream on the bruise on her nose. She sat still her eyes closed. He took in her features, how she was still herself. The same woman he loved, and still loves.

“You’re supposed to be with her, not with your ex fiancée.” She said while opening her eyes to look at him.

“I’m not with her for some time now. As much as it was mesmerising, it wasn’t it. I had time to think about my mistakes. I was the number one asshole.”

“You were, that’s for sure. I was so mad at you, angry and pissed off. You just threw our lives we built together out of the window. We could’ve talk about that, I would understand anything. But not that huge heartbreak you put me through. I had a surprise honeymoon booked for you. And I went on it with Kelly, because it cost really so much money…” her eyes were filled with tears as she relived the memories of pain.

George looked down in shame, he was pained by his actions towards her. She truly loved him, deeply, she was always so caring and he was… him.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve talk to you more, not just tear you from me and destroy our life.”

Their conversation was interrupted by doorbell.

“That’s most likely Kelly and Max.” Grace said. George retreated from her as she stood up to get to the door. As she opened, Kelly hugged her immediately and Max looked through the space for George with mad look.

“How are you, love?” Kelly looked at her nose with frown.

“I’m good, Kells, really. George took care of me.” She softly smiled.

“Really? No doubt that he did.” Max looked with narrowed look at George, who stood in the doorframe to living room.

“I’m on my way out, I see that she’s in good hands.” George said plainly.

“In the best hands.” Kelly said with not amused look.

She sighed tired from all the tension.

“Take care.” George kissed her forehead lightly as he brushed off around them.

All three of them were looking at his figure until he disappeared in the elevator.

“How- what the actual fuck?” Kelly asked looking at her flushed face.

“Kells, please.” Max groaned at the word fuck.

She took them inside as she prepared some coffee for them.

“How was your flight?” She asked casually.

The duo looked at her in disbelief. “You just had your ex in your home and you’re asking us about flight?”

“Yeah and yeah?”

“Tell us everything!”

She sat in front of them in the armchair. “I was at the café this morning, you know, I like to try new places and he just happened to be there. I spotted him and I was so in shock, that I crashed to the glass door. He got me to the hospital, took care of everything. And he apologised for everything he put me through. He said that he was number one asshole.”

Max snorted as Kelly looked over him with stern look.

“And then you came and that’s it.”

“He kissed you. You’re okay with that?” Kelly asked sipping on her coffee.

“Why not?”

“Because he practically left you at the altar?”

“Oh that. I nearly forgot about that.” She gave her an sarcastic smile.

“You’re falling for his lies again.”

“No, I’m not. We just talked, he was nice. I deserved to know, what was on his mind and behind his actions. I can move on now.”

“Can you?”

The question was hanging in the space. She was sure, to this day, that she wouldn’t even lay her eyes on him. But it was all nice and she felt loved again. All the wrong things.

“Can you?” Kelly asked again.

“Fine! I don’t know!” She rolled her eyes.

“You’re unbelievable. He broke your heart, you were a mess. And now he’s messing with you again.”

“I know, I know all that. And I’m grateful for the care you have for me. But… it’s complicated.”

“It’s not. You love him.” Max interrupted them. Kelly gave him another look of disbelief.

“I’m not sure, I don’t know. I’m not ready for anything but it feels so close to home.”

“Jeez… just be careful. Anyway, it’s perfect timing really, because we wanted to get you to spent a weekend at Silverstone with us.” Kelly said with sour face, now her idea sounding not so perfect.

“I need to think about it. And I don’t know how this thing will turn out to appear.” She pointed to her bruised nose.

“You know the power of makeup, dear.” Kelly rolled her eyes.

“As much as I like you here with me I need some space right now.” She said with sigh.

“Just think about it and give me a call and we’ll manage it. You could use some fun around old friends.” Kelly said while she hugged her.

Max gave her reassuring smile as they walked into the elevator.

———

She took a shower as she thought about George. How his fingertips felt against her skin, his scent calming her down, how he looked at her with care and love, he was completely different. He looked like he was ready to die for her.

Then there was the other side. How she felt humiliated when he left her at the restaurant in Monaco with smile, ready for his new life.

How the ring on her left hand was somehow heavy.

Thoughts there and there, she needed to be honest with herself.

She loved him. Still. And truly. Even after all of this.

As she laid in bed scrolling through her phone, she got a call from unknown number.

“I have a package for you, is this Ms. L/N ?”

“Yes, that’s me.”

She went down to receive the mystery package. Back at the apartment, she opened it. There was VIP and paddock pass with her name, also she spotted a sticky note with handwriting.

“Just in case you want to have fun on the weekend. GR”

Her heart skipped a beat as she read those words. Snapping a photo of it she sent it to Kelly with comment I think the plans are clear for the weekend. Kelly answered with crazy emojis and comment I can’t wait.

She decided not to tell George that she’s actually coming, because he deserved a little silent treatment. He’s gonna need to win her heart back.

As the Saturday approached, she was already on her way to the paddock gates. The first she spotted her was Lando.

“Oh my god! Am I dreaming?” He nearly shouted as he hugged her tight.

She giggled happily. “No, this is real.”

Greeting with others went well as she arrived at the Mercedes hospitality, her stomach churning and turning in nervous way, reliving all the memories she had there. She got to chat with some people, which were surprised that she’s there. Nobody had the courage to ask her, why she’s there and she was glad.

Grabbing some coffee she stood outside on the little terrace looking at the Silverstone track. It was like coming back to home.

“You came.” The voice said behind her causing her to turn around. There stood George, wearing his Mercedes shirt and white pants along with kind smile.

“I thought that you not being sure if I’d come, would be a good treatment for you.” She sipped her coffee with a little smile.

“I absolutely deserve that.” He said coming to her side.

“I’m sorry about yesterday. Kelly and Max were there for me for all that shit you put me through. They’re worried.”

“I understand that. They’re really good friends. I’m grateful that they helped you through tough times.”

“I thought I’d never see this again.” She looked over the track.

“I thought I’d never see you here again.”

“I don’t want to poke in that hurtful things from past anymore. If anything, I want things from fresh start.”

“Again, I’m sorry. And I understand.”

“You know, it’s not like winning race to win my heart.”

“I’d likely do both.”

“We’ll see.”

She chuckled as she was enjoying messing with him.

“Good luck.” She smiled softly giving his arm a little squeeze as she walked out to find Kelly.

———

George got the pole position and she couldn’t be more proud. She fought that huge smile on her face as she noticed, how Kelly was watching her. Max took a second place.

She leaned against the frame of the entrance to the Mercedes garage, where George celebrated with everybody around him. Then he noticed her standing there and smiling proudly. Immediately he walked towards her getting her into his tight embrace while she giggled.

“You’re incredible, George.” She said laughing.

“You’re my lucky charm.” He said as he placed kiss to her hair. His embrace was warm and soft. All she missed that long.

“Please, just don’t let me go.” She whispered to his chest.

“I’m not gonna make that mistake ever again.”

[donutz]

Yandere Smiling Critters x male child reader[pt. 2]

Requests from Tumblr and Wattpad—!, but not really

(Minus the fact I didn't include you being turned)

—☆You are a human in this

Sadly, you couldn’t stay here forever.

You are home now. Adopted. You did spend your time at Playcare for a couple of years though, everybody knew you, everybody in Playcare that is. The critters and kids knew you, the staff knew you, Miss Delight knew you.

So you had a mark on the place when it was time for you to leave. To get your own house. You were happy to get a home, but sad you had to leave your friends behind.

Maybe you could revisit this place again. Come back. But you couldn’t.

Something happened.

8/8/1995

You don’t know what happened that day, but you guess it was something pretty bad. It caused the whole company to shut down. You no longer saw any commercials of the toys.

Rumors were spread around, maybe somebody died, maybe a toy hurt somebody, maybe.. Maybe an experiment happened.

Anyways. There was a letter. A letter in the mail, something that related to your old home. Find the flower?

.

.

.

Sure. Why not, you were seventeen, you can handle yourself.

Which is something you shouldn’t have ever thought, after what you’ve been through.

It’s been scary. You haven’t died yet, but death has wanted to shake your hand a few times.

You almost bumped your head on a metal pipe while passing through a dark hallway, nearly broke your leg because you wanted to jump off a platform, wanting things to go by faster.

You’ve been chased through vents, and ended up at a dead end. You didn’t know what to do. You almost got shredded. But, were spared.

“.. Huggy?” He stared at you, maybe he recognizes you, even after all these years.

He didn’t kill you. He let you down on the second level of the metal stairways with his arm, and went back to where he originally was.

Then you were solving puzzles, with a particular doll following after you.

But the doll got snatched up, by a spider. Mommy Long Legs. She did remember you, you were the one who wasn’t so good at the games..(for the sake of your life in this story)

But she thought you left her to die, so she still forced you to play the three games. The first game has Bunzo! He was hesitant to kill you, you were the kindest kid to him when you lived here.

And for the first time, you actually beat the game! He was so proud of you! He wasn’t proud of his unfortunate fate in the future, but at least he didn’t need to kill you.

Then the small Huggies. They also remembered you, so they were sparing you. You also beat that game! They were happy, letting out tiny purrs at your success.

Then Pj— Wait. Since when were you so good at these games? The last I checked, you failed every single one of them! Fine. I’ll just sabotage the game for you, to make sure you never leave.

You could see Pj coming out of his pug-a-pillar hole, and you were sweating a little. Hopefully he remembered you too.

He did, once he saw you he stopped in his crawling tracks, taking a pause. He missed your younger adorable face when he gave you a small bump on your back, signifying that the ‘game’ was over.

But he unpaused at the start of the music playing.

You escaped. Out of there. That’s fine. I could just chase you myself

Three chases. You got chased THREE times. How desperate was she to kill you?!

You were putting the blue hand on the scanner, when you heard Mommy’s quick steps towards you.

You looked behind you— Eyes widening from her abrupt appearance. For the fourth time.

The door opened! And.. Mommy got killed, by you, by your hands.

A hand crept out from the thin crevice of a metal door. It took Mommy’s left over body, to wherever. You didn’t know what it was. Where it took her. But thanked god(or not, depends on your thoughts) at the fact that you weren’t Mommy at this moment.

Now you are somewhere. The train crashed, and you could feel the back of your shirt being picked up. You were sliding down a pipe, into somewhere.

You don’t know where it was, but you needed to get out, fast.

Doing some parkour, you looked around, and saw a long tail(plus paws) crawling up inside a vent.

“... Catnap?”

You went through some doors, and ended up seeing where the crashed train was. Going somewhere, you could see the recognizable entrance you went to at age 5. The way to Playcare.

You could hear the sounds of steps. Hurrying up you went inside the much smaller train compared to the one you were originally in.

“My name is Elliot Ludwig.”

Hm. Those words you could remember.

“When you look around at the world today,” You repeated after him.

“what one thing do you think it needs more of?”

“Playcare!”

Even at seventeen years, you were still mesmerized by what was shown.

You looked down, and could see 3— no. Five creatures walking or crawling around, resembling the Smiling Critters.

“Oh.”

Some of the critters could hear Elliot’s voice continue about Playcare, eyeing the moving train.

They saw your shadowed figure. Not knowing who you were. But a light is shown on your face.

Bubba, Dogday, Kickin, Hoppy, and Bobby saw your face. You’re back?

No. They must be seeing things. You were gone. Away from them.

But Dogday could recognize those eyes. Your skin, your curiosity, your hair(if your hair changed colors, or texture after growing up, then.. Yea, he still remembered you).

“Angel?” (Even if you didn’t really save him, he’s going to call you Angel. Because I needed a nickname for you. Y’know, because I can’t list every single name of the people who’re reading this?)

The other critters heard his whisper. … Maybe it was you.

The train stopped. But you were kind of scared, were they like Huggy or Mommy? Were they going to chase you down?

“Ah shit.”

‘Language.’ Dogday thought, dogs have good hearing y’know!

You were trying to find a way for two possible outcomes of being down here.

A) Try to make the train go back if the critters try to kill you

Or

B) Somehow reminisce in meeting your old friends

B sounded a lot more better than A.

And.. B did happen!

The 5 critters went over to the train, while you were standing there. Waiting for whatever will happen to you.

Dogday crawled over to you, it was you! Your scent!

He gave you the biggest hug while his tail wagged(really fast, it’s kind of crazy).

He was still fluffy even after these 10 years.

“Angel I missed you so much—!”

You were trying to hug him back, but a little too scared because of the critters staring into your soul.

Dogday noticed their silence and spoke up—

“Guys! This is Angel!! You don’t recognize him??”

Silence.

“THE ONE WHO WAS HIDING BEHIND PICKY..??”

“OHH”

“YOU’RE BACK?!?”

“I was thinking that it was him but I wasn’t sure…”

“ANGEL!?!?!?”

You were escorted out of the train, and were greeted by a bunch of animals pawing at you.

You couldn’t get a word in!

Picky, Crafty and Catnap came over, hearing all of the excited animal noises.

Now you were crowded by a bunch of animals. You were so tiny compared to them, so they had to be gentle.

So much noises were going on that even the smaller critters came over to see the commotion.

You were back home!

Now you can’t leave.

[xoxochb]

Hi!! It’s like my first time requesting so please prepare for the amount of times I type out ‘like’😭 I hope you have/had a good day!!

So percy is kind of like the person that everybody has had a crush on at least once, right?

Basically, percy likes the reader and let’s also say that they’re one of the most nicest people on camp but, today they’re kind of irritated because they had a bad day. To add onto it, percy tries to talk to reader but they’re like so irritated that they accidentally raise their voice at him and reader apologizes to percy. But this leaves percy kind of sad and he’s overthinking, reader—a few days after the incident—goes up to percy and apologizes, they give him like a small gift bag(??). Percy, having feelings for reader, is ecstatic/giddy because of this and is also kind of taken aback from this, he plays it off and acts all nonchalant about it but he somehow makes it so painfully obvious as well. So the whole day, he just kind of sits around and admires the reader.

But turns out that the reader also likes Percy and their siblings kind of tease them about the gift basket. The reader also admires percy whenever he’s not looking at them. (This can just be a little bonus!!)

If you need specifics, can the reader be from cabin 10/Aphrodite’s cabin (but like it’s up to you!!😭) and uhm maybe fem!reader (?)

Anyways, have a nice day!!🫶🫶

⋆·˚ ༘ * looking at you got me thinking nonsense

warnings: none

pairing: percy jackson x daughter of aphrodite

you were the camp sweetheart, a pure soul. everyone admired you and your generous demeanor, but today you were in an irritated mood from being packed with camp duties along with a few personal favors

it started this morning when you had gotten up early to the screaming of your siblings (they had been rudely accusing each other of stealing their clothes), then you had to help set up a breakfast double-date, archery practice after, you didn’t have time for lunch because one of your friends needed urgent love advice, then you had offered to wash the dishes after lunch, and now it’s four in the afternoon, you haven’t had any time to relax

even now when you were supposed to be relaxing you couldn’t find your favorite lipgloss so you had to tear up the cabin to find it, which you didn’t, because that’s what your still doing after twenty minutes of searching

but soon enough your search was interrupted by your favorite son of poseidon, percy jackson

you usually would have been happy to see him but today every little thing- even the smallest thing- would add on to your irritation

“I haven’t seen you all day” he states

“yeah, well, I’ve been busy. I don’t always have time to see you, you know?” you open one of your siblings drawers, disappointed to see your lipgloss was not there

percy knows something’s up because you never talk to anyone like that- especially him “are you alright? have you eaten today? I know you’ve been busy”

“I’m fine! If you really knew that I was busy you would leave me alone��� you snap

he frowns at the tone of your voice “oh… I’m sorry. I’m gonna go, we’ll talk later?”

“whatever” you mumble

percy leaves cabin ten with a sad demeanor. what had he done to anger you? he lays awake that night wondering what he did so wrong to make you- the nicest girl he knew- out of all people so frustrated with him

little does he know, you lay awake also wondering why you snapped at him. he was only trying to be nice. he was concerned for you, he cared for you more than anyone and you treated him terribly

how could you make him forgive you?

💌

for the next few days you think of how you’re going to make it up to percy, he deserved more than just a simple ‘I’m sorry’

as your skipping rocks on the water you realize what you have to do. you quickly stand up and rush to the edge of the water, where you search for as many tiny seashells as you can find and once you get back to your cabin you begin making your present

when you finish it you put it in a small box with a pink bow on top- your specialty

unfortunately for you, you were caught by silena with the box in your hand

“what’s that?” she smirks

“it’s nothing, I have to go do something, sorry” you try to rush past her but she stops you

“who’s it for?”

“nobody”

“you’re not leaving until you tell me”

you sigh knowing this information was indeed true

“It’s for percy”

she nods with a victory smile knowing she’s got what she wants

“go get him”

you thank her before rushing to cabin three, which you find him exiting

“percy!” you run over to him “can we talk?”

“of course”

“great, uhm, so first I wanted to say that I’m so sorry for the other day, I was so busy and I had nothing to eat, not even a cup of coffee! you know how I get when I don’t have coffee. but anyways I was so irritated with everything, and you came in right when I was in the middle of looking for my lipgloss and I was getting angry because I couldn’t find it and I just took anger out on you, and I swear it had nothing to do with you, I lov- you’re my best friend, I would never mean to hurt you on purpose” you ramble “I made this for you” you hand him the small box

If you were anyone else percy would’ve hated getting a present with a pink bow on top, but since it was you he could never hate it

“as much as I love you giving me a gift… why are you giving me this?”

“I felt bad about the other day, you deserve more than just an apology”

percy was trying to act chill about this but it was you! the most gorgeous girl at camp- but if you asked percy he would’ve said in the universe.

and you were standing in with him in front of his cabin giving him a gift, looking at him with a loving look!! he swore his heart was about to explode out of his chest any moment

but besides his heartbeat, his face was adorned with a bright red hue “thank you” he tries to fight a wide grin, he didn’t want to appear as a lovesick fool (although the was)

“you’re welcome” you smile and plant a kiss on his red cheek “will I see you later?”

“yes! yeah, definitely, of course” he stumbles over his words

“great! you can come to my cabin after dinner, I’ll see you then!” you kiss his other cheek before giggling and skipping your way to the dining pavilion

💌

at dinner percy couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. how could he? that can’t be possible! you looked beautiful laughing with your siblings, and the sound of your laugh oh gods, it was oxygen to him, truly.

and your smile? don’t even get him started because he’ll never finish, he could go on about your smile for eternity

your voice? as soft as a newly washed blanket, he wanted your voice injected in his veins if that was even possible, which he was sure it wasn’t, but if there was a way he would do it

and over at aphrodite cabin you snuck glances over at percy whenever you could (which was whenever your siblings weren’t looking, they would tease you forever)

however every time you looked over his eyes were already on you, then you would both look away quickly trying to pretend you never made eye contact, but you both knew you did

the same way you both knew that tonight you would’ve gave percy the kiss he had been longing for since he first saw you under the twinkling moonlight

[franzkafkagf]

How do you personally think they massacred his potential? I fully agree, by the way. He could have and should have been a fan favourite. He's one of the most tragic characters I've seen, honestly. He's interesting and definitely the most complex character of the season, but the lack of catharsis the writers gave him for his issues is anger inducing.

the concept is just so good to me. the prince with no sense for duty or responsibility, who did not want the throne but feels forced to take it anyways. he takes the throne to save his family and yet, he watches all of them die anyways.

At first, the prince refused to be a part of his mother’s plans. “My sister is the heir, not me,” he said. “What sort of brother steals his sister’s birthright?” Only when Ser Criston convinced him that the princess must surely execute him and his brothers should she don the crown did Aegon waver.

that's just amazing. i cannot stress this enough; it's so profoundly tragic and sad. i don't hate everything they did with him in the show; they have many good ideas actually. him rejecting his valyrian heritage, him being kind of a failure at everything, him being desperate to my accepted/loved... this is all profound and good stuff! but i feel like his tragedy has been squandered by how the writers decided to frame the story. i could go on about how rhaenyra and alicent are potrayed so blandly in this show in order to make their embarrassing gender essentialism theme going but this is about aegon so i won't go into that.

aegon reminds me so much of theon greyjoy. maybe it's just me, but in my head theon and aegon start the story in similar places. they're spoilt, vain and indulgent. then they get their "calling", for aegon it's the crown. it's the first time in his life that he has a reason to get out of bed, to actually do something good for once. also, him believing his father actually wanted him to take the crown and it hurting him when otto scoffed at him for believing it? AMAZING stuff. I love s02xe02 to bits.

because [my father] didn't like me

theon's calling is to finally get his father's approval. balon, obviously, has no fatherly affection towards him and theon kind of knows it, he still betrays the only person he ever truly loved. and what happens to theon? he loses everything, absolutely everything; he is stripped of his pride, his dignity, of his entire identity. i've never seen a character go through something theon went through.

and i see parallels to aegon here! aegon is quite literally made and broken by the weight of a crown he never wanted. his story is more tragic than theon actually; the thing that destroyed him was quite literally forced on him. it actually kills me to think about it. he rushes into rook's rest because he feels powerless; because everybody around him shows him not even one ounce of empathy. his baby is dead and no one seems to care!

and he fails; of course he does. he is BETRAYED by his own brother, the brother he thought was loyal to him. this is just such good stuff my head hurts. his arc after the fall of KL is so amazing too, i'm desperate to see him go on his adventure to dragonstone and actually grow into the type of man that can turn rhaenyra's own people against her.

now, what could've been done to make his arc better in the show? well. let's start with not making him a rapist. i cannot stress this enough. the single worst choice was to introduce him as a rapist. it's actually crazy to me. it's so easy too... just make him like theon; make him promiscuous, make him vain, make him spoilt! they should've introduce his adult version with a drunk sex scene actually. set the tone for his character from the beginning.

he is not suited for the throne; he seeks pleasures, doesn't care for his valyrian lessons (based!), he drinks all day... like, what was the POINT of making him a rapist? what was it? -> the answer is obvious.... they didn't want us sympathizing with him. they were scared of people liking the villain. why is this hbo show scared you might have people sympathizing and pitying the "villain"? are you okay? YOU HAD ONE JOB. DEAR GOD.....

so with that said; make his motivations clearer. have him scream at aemond after jaehaerys dies, change up the godawful brothel scene to actually drive the point home; he is still grieving and his way of grieving is lashing out and drinking himself half to death! focus on his alcoholism and his rashness. I actually rewrote the brothel scene here

make us understand him bettter; there are moments like the "do you love me?" or all of ep 1 and 2 of season 2, but it's too little, too late. the writers in general have such a hard time with writing characters with actual qualities. all of them are so empty and act like robots. only aegon, criston, daemon and rhaenyra (in episodes 1 and 2 at least... then we went right back to robot mode lmao) show moments of actually being a character with rich inner workings. i hate it so much.

[hooked-on-elvis]

I'm shocked (not really, but it's shocking to hear this anyway) to learn that at some point in life Priscilla sued Marty Lacker for a money Elvis gave him. She dropped the lawsuit when Marty counterclaimed it. Marty says "She messed with the wrong guy, but she was trying to use me as a test case against the other guys. She is a lovely person."

(1) February 25-26, 1965: Elvis signing autographs for fans in Nashville while he was in town for the recording session for the "Harum Scarum" movie soundtrack. Marty Lacker is seen by Elvis' side.

YOUTUBE - INTERVIEW WITH MARTY LACKER BY JOE KREIN PART 3 (out of 4) (go to 30:00 to listen his story about the lawsuit by Priscilla)

Now, this is just my personal comments on this but for all I've learned about Marty Lacker so far I believe he had the best interests at heart concerning Elvis. He helped EP with his music career A LOT. The way he puts it, it seems he worried with Elvis' name in the business because: 1. Marty knew EP had so much to offer (as everybody else knew), so much talent to go to waste on unworthy movies and its soundtracks and on general commercially weak songs, and 2. I bet it wasn't funny to see people mocking his friend for the kind of music and movies Elvis was making. Marty, as well as some other Memphis Mafia guys, worried about Elvis' personal satisfaction and well-being for multiple reasons... maybe not all of them being selfless but I still believe they did care about Elvis as a friend and human being even if they had hidden interests and whatever was the nature of them.

Now, all of those guys (all the people) around EP were seeing him killing himself little by little while trying to numb the disturbing thoughts in his mind and the sorrow in his soul... they were witnessing all of the sad incidents happening over the years where Elvis would end up hurting himself or almost dead. Marty was one of the few people that would go against Colonel Parker when he convinced Elvis to try something new for his career, something that would end up giving Elvis a great refreshing moment in his life, something he was hoping for deep down but somehow couldn't imagine how to make it happen himself and the ones who were in the place to advice him were too busy with their own personal agendas to care about the King's aspirations for his career.

Marty was the one to manage getting Elvis into the American Sound studio (later at the Stax too), and Marty was also the one to recommend the Sweet Inspirations to work on Elvis' concerts. Just by that alone, ALONE, could you really think Marty deserved a lawsuit for a money Priscilla didn't even need? I mean, where is the gratitude to some of the close friends of the man she allegedly says she loved?

As he said in the same interview, Marty was no saint… he wasn't a leech either. There was a time when Elvis lent him some money and Marty paid him back some time later, so Elvis was deeply touched by it because normally no one would pay him back ever! That shows something, right?

Maybe I don't know enough yet because I'm relatively a new born in the Elvis fandom, and I absolutely don't agree with every statement I've listened/read coming from Marty but in general I see him as one of the good guys from the Memphis Mafia bunch. I mean, every story has two sides. Maybe Priscilla sued Marty after being counselled to do so by some lawyer she had, like she was when she decided take Elvis to the court again in 1973, asking for more money after the divorce settlement had been set in 1972 - and by this I mean she could've been convinced to sue Marty instead of having the idea herself, which at least would make things a little less awful. But any reason she had to do that, I mean... why? There's things in life we just don't do. Even if she didn't personally liked the guy (and we know from Elvis' friends the ones she really liked were Joe Esposito and Jerry Schilling), she had to admit Marty was a great contributor to the Elvis Presley estate from which she benefits until today. I think for all Marty did for Elvis' career it's reasonable to think that any money he could've borrowed from EP would have already made its way back into the Presley's bank account in other ways. Maybe a little bit of gratitude and respect to him wouldn't hurt. I mean, I'm not totally against Priscilla... in some ways I can understand her, I really can, but not on this. Not when it comes to her greediness.

I just wonder what would Elvis think.

(2) The Presley's wedding day, February 1, 1967. Marty with Elvis and Priscilla.

FURTHER INFO: On July 17 1973, "in the papers presented to the court Priscilla's new attorney seeks to set aside the original divorce settlement." - Excerpt from 'Elvis Day by Day' by Peter Guralnick and Ernst Jorgensen. Now in addition to what has been agreed on the August 1972 divorce settlement, from the 1973 new settlement Priscilla would also receive, among other things, Spousal support, additional $625,000 (in cash) to the original $100.000 agreed and 5% of Elvis' royalties.

[icycoldninja]

Could you please write Dante and/or V with a reader who is a people pleaser with really bad abandonment issues but doesn't really say anything, instead they just curl up in a ball under the covers then cry themselves to sleep and avoid everybody for like a week-

I'm just sad and they are everything to me :/

Hope you're doing absolutely lovely today!!

Yes, I can! I'm sorry to hear about your mood, tho. Hope this makes you feel better.

Dante + V x People pleaser!Reader with abandonment issues headcannons

¤ Dante ¤

-Dante hates how you drop everything to make everyone happy.

-He knows why you do it, and understands that you're afraid to disappoint others for fear of getting abandoned, but this is going too far.

-He decided to sit you down one day and give you a talk, not caring whether or not he started to sound like Vergil or not.

-He repeatedly tells you that you shouldn't care what other people think of you. Being abandoned is no fun, he knows, but those people are just going to use you for being so nice to them. Besides, even if they do all leave, he won't.

-Smothers you in cuddles and tight hugs whenever he can to remind you that he loves you.

-When he traps you in his hold, he will NOT let go for any reason, so watch out.

● V ●

-V cannot understand why you try so hard to make people who don't care about you happy.

-He tries to convince you (calmly) to open your eyes and see the truth. There's no need to try and please everyone--you can't, anyway.

-Your sacrifices are largely in vain, and while he would love to tell you this, V knows that doing so might upset you.

-With some spywork from Griffon, V gathers information behind your behavior, eventually realizing that you have some serious abandonment issues, which is why you act this way.

-So, at night, when you think he's asleep, he will curl himself around him and just bask in your presence, reminding you that you're never going to be alone as long as he lives.

-Sometimes he has his familiars join him, which is nice, but can be kind of annoying, especially when Shadow decides your face is a good resting place for its tail.

[glitter-stained]

Let's build Jason a bookshelf !

Pride and Prejudice - homeboy is an Austen fan canonically, we need at least this one.

Hamlet -do I need to say more? Do I?

Water for the elephants: He won't admit it, but the book reminds him of Dick, and he reads it any time he misses him. It's angsty enough to maintain a front while actually being a romance with a satisfying ending.

The Outsiders: It's not just that the story is relatable and really well written; it's the themes of loyalty, grief and heroism, and the imagery and hopefulness shining through, and it's the way Johnny reminds him of Roy and sometimes, after Roy's death, he will close his eyes and picture the two of them together in an abandoned church, in that quiet space safe from the war raging outside, reading Gone With the Wind while Roy provides uncharitable commentary about the characters' decisions.

Under The Whispering Door (TJ Klune): This one was gifted to him by Tim because "the main character is an asshole ghost, I thought you might relate." Of course, these idiots could talk to eachother about emotions and go to therapy, but why do that when you can bait your brother into reading a story that will help him process a bit of his relationship with his own death and the family? The worst part is, it worked great, and Jason is so upset that it became one of his favourite books. (The part about the stages of grief is scientifically inaccurate, though. He would know.)

A compilation of TS Eliot's works: Maybe it's because I'm a big fan of TS Eliot and Jason, but every time I reread one of his poems, I think about Jason and I'm sad. The Hollow Men, in particular about the fallen soldiers from WWI, hits so hard as a Jason poem, especially when you consider he lived through the explosion but died of smoke inhalation.

Flowers for Algernon: After losing Bizarro, Jason rereads it often, sitting on rooftops, every time the sky is bright enough to see the stars. He reads it out loud, and the words burn his tongue and taste bitter every time every time, but he likes to pretend his friend is listening, and feels a little less alone.

The Oresteia: This one belongs to the list Jason has read many times and should probably read less, because he projects the tragedy onto his real life and it's a bad influence that comforts him in the idea that he was doomed from the start and might as well burn the remains of the bridges with his family. Good luck trying to pry it out of his hands though! He also loves the idea of being seen at his worst, in the midst of all his hopelessness, and being loved anyway, cradled with unwavering devotion.

Frankenstein : He's a huge Mary Shelley fan, both as a person and a writer. As for Hamlet and the Oresteia, he definitely projects maybe a little too much of some of the characters, but hey, not everybody can brag that they relate to the Creature on such a visceral level.

What else would you guys add?

[og-akiree]

Yandere Sir Pentious | General Headcanons

Since no one else is doing it, I will >:(

Ps. I take requests ;)

● He may not be the smartest or strongest, but he's got the spirit alright.

● In this scenario, you met him first at the Hotel. Maybe you were a sinner looking for redemption? Maybe you were Charlie's friend or in a leash? Or maybe you just were there for the free housing? Either way, this man fell in love with you on first sight, believe it or not.

● He walks in all sad and pitiful `redemption redemption' and you don't buy his lie and goddamn it he doesn't know why but the glare you are giving him gives him the chills. And not in a bad way mind you.

● Like you're just standing there glaring at him, and he just locks up when he sees your eyes on him. `Who is this?` `What's their name?` `WHY ARE THEY SO GODDAMN SEXY?!`

● Eventually (literally on the first day lmao) when Angel Dust discovers the "hidden" camera and you walk in, dropkick him and stand on his back with one leg to keep him down he almost moans right then and there. Like wtf why are you so good-looking while beating the shit outta him???

● You ain't even gotta be stronger than him. When you lay your hands on him (or literally any part of you), he just locks up and lets you throw him around.

● The Egg Boyz are gonna call you 'mom' 'mama' 'momma' or any possible alternate regardless of your gender (or lack of).

● Like the Egg Boyz just are too dumb to comprehend anything. In their eyes, the boss loves likes you, you care for the Egg Boyz (whether out of your own volition or not doesn't matter), and you keep their boss in line. To them, you're a mother because a mother's role is to care and keep the daddy in line, right? (Why Egg Boyz, why).

● Anyways, as a yandere, Sir Pentious is more capable of showing his feelings for you than in the show. Instead of saying, "Because I'm buying drinks for everyone," he goes "because you are my first ever friend" or something like that.

● Though he certainly isn't the strongest demon out there, he ain't the weakest either. If some random demon happens to be messing with you, they just might find themselves in a bit of a pickle when Sir Pentious pays them a visit <33

● "You better bow down trash. You're in the presence of a RULER." (He's talking about you, btw) he worships the ground you walk on. You can't do any wrong in his eyes (even though you are in Hell for a reason)

● You could literally blow up an orphanage, and he would go "Yeah well the orphanage was in their way."

● In the final battle, you had gotten hurt, and he couldn't stand it. In his eyes, someone so powerful and mighty (even though you may actually be weaker than him) couldn't be defeated by something as simple as a hit from the first man ever, right? Right?!

● There are two ways we can go from here.

● One is that Sir Pentious sacrifices himself for you. He sees how hurt you are and filled with rage and the thirst of revenge he gets a confidence boost and kisses you deeply, declaring his undying love for you in front of EVERYBODY.

• Then he powers up the machine, dies an embarrassing death and yada yada. Now in Heaven, he will literally fight tooth and nail to either get back down to you or to bring you up there with him.

● If it so happens that he can't remember anything, then he would feel deep longing for something or someone that he can't quite place. What is this painful feeling in his chest? Why does he feel like he is missing someone important?

● Alternatively, if it so happens that YOU end up dying in the final battle, then Holy Hell.

● Seeing your lifeless body fills him with pure heartbreak that he didn't know he was even capable of feeling.

● He would kill himself then and there. He doesn't care who he will leave behind as long as he gets to die, too, while holding your hand or hugging your body close to his. He can't live without you, even in Hell. To him, the only way to be loyal to you now that you are dead is to be dead with you.

● Even in death, you can't escape your diehard fan <3

[doudouneverte]

Obi imagine

Part 1 - Obi Breakups up with Reader because of a argument. Can be because of anything but it’s bad. Maybe Accuse of cheating bad or something else? Anyway Reader ends up moving to a new club from Wolfsburg without telling Obi after the heartbreak. (Sad Ending).

Part 2 - After the breakup and not seeing each other for months? Weeks? They’re about to see each other again at the German national camp. Awkward, Reader tries to ignore Obi because she is still hurt, maybe gets close with another teammate which makes Obi jealous. Anyway it’s a mess and affects the way the team plays so the team try to get them to resolve their problems. Who knows maybe communicating is all they needed to do (Happy Ending).

a/n: thank you; that's a very good request

Up and Down

Pairing: Lena Oberdorf x EintrachtF!Reader; Laura Freigang x GERWNT!Reader(best friend); GERWNT x Reader

Summary: based on the request above

Type: angst & fluff

Warning:

word count: 2295

-----

Honestly, you didn't know how you got there. A few minutes earlier, you were having just a little heated chat, and now things were totally blowing up.

"-you're always acting like that!" The midfielder yelled at you.

"Lena, watch your tone..." 

"Or what? You'll also tell it to Laura, maybe?" 

Here we go again, you thought. Honestly, you didn't know how everything started. Laura and you have always been close; she was like the sister you never had. Even after you signed your first contract with Wolfsburg and hers with Frankfurt, things never changed between you two. And it was really cool at first.

But since a few months ago, you started to date Lena. And even if everybody was aware of your bond with the number 10 of Frankfurt, the midfielder didn't see it in a good way. Well, not at first. At first, she was more than happy to see how you connected on the pitch with your best friend, but quickly you also restarted to connect off the pitch. As much as you could, you were on your way to Frankfurt to see her or on the phone with her, and that started to piss off your girlfriend. More than that, she started to accuse you of cheating on her with your own best friend, which was totally crazy.

"Can you please not bring that again?" You were already more angry about where things were going.

"Why?" 

"Look, we lost, okay? I'm as angry as you, but right now Laura has nothing to do with that." Losing 4-0 was never a good experience, even more so when it's against your best friend's team.

"Of course she has something to do with it when she scored a brace and that you didn't do anything to stop her." 

"I'm a striker; that's not my principal job to stop opponents offensives. That's your job, so stop being mad at something you should have done!" You also started to raise your voice. To be completely honest, you didn't like raising your voice and even more on Lena, even when she's mean like that.

"You know what? I don't know why we decided to start this." She said with a seemingly quieter voice. "Maybe it was a mistake."

You took a moment to analyze what she said before asking, "What do you mean? What was a mistake?" 

"Everything. This match. Us. Everything." She replied with a light sob.

"Babe, you're not doing what I think?" You asked even if you already knew the answer.

"Sorry, Y/n but it doesn't work between. I think we need to break up and start to focus more on ourselves than us." She replied. There was a loud silence while you were processing everything.

"No, Lena, please, you can't." 

"I'm sorry, Y/n." She said while she made her way to the door of your apartment. "I'll ask Jule to pick up my thing during the week. Good bye." She finished her sentence by closing the door behind her, letting you alone in front of the door with a blurry vision drowned in tears and a last memory of your lover ending what seemed to be the best thing in your life.

This night, you cried a lot. The other half of the bed being totally empty was the principal reason. Even before you started to date, Lena had a lot of sleepovers at your place, and most of the time you would both fall asleep on your bed after talking for hours about everything and nothing, like you didn't spend almost all your day together.

Crossing that door broke not only your relationship with her but also your friendship.

A few kilometers away from Wolfsburg, your best friend started to worry when she didn't receive any text from you. You always texted each other after a game, even if you played against each other. It was like a silent promise that you made.

At first, she thought that you were just trying to seek comfort with your girlfriend, but when the next day, Jule called her to let her know that you hadn't contacted any members of the team for the whole day, it started to worry her.

You still didn't know why you did this, but after Lena broke up with you, you called Tommy and told him that you needed some time to yourself before leaving the city. The ride was like usual; you knew it so well for a while now. When you arrived at your destination, it was already past 12 a.m. You didn't have to make the call to know that she would be there.

Laura was desperately trying to reach you when she heard someone knock on her door. She didn't wait until she opened the door to face you. You were exhausted because of the ride, and from your face, she knew that you didn't sleep eight hours the previous night.

"What are you doing here?" The midfielder asked but didn't wait for your answer to drag you into her apartment. "Jule called me; she said that you didn't reply when she called you and that something bad happened yesterday." Your best friend told you, very worried, and when you replied with nothing but silence, her state didn't change for the best. "Y/n? What's wrong?"

Hearing this question made you remember why you were there. Tears started to roll down your cheeks, and you didn't do anything to stop them.

"She left me." You said between sobs, making your best friend look at you confused. "She broke up with me." You added before falling apart. The Frankfurt player held you in her arms, trying to comfort you while her jaw was clenched. She was ready to kill the Wolfsburg player.

"Hey, I'll prepare the spare bedroom and let you rest well." She proposed after you started to calm down. When you nodded, she stood up and took your bags and put them in the spare room.

One hour later, you were sleeping while Laura was just ending a call with your mom when she told her that you had decided to spend some time in hers. She was pouring a cup of water, trying to calm her anger, when she heard someone knock on her door. Once the door opened, the midfielder was greeted by two of your national teammates.

"Where is she?" Anyomie asked. Laura pointed to the spare bedroom with her head, letting the forward find you.

"I swear I'll kill Lena." Sara declared while she followed the younger player.

"Not if I beat you on that," Laura said.

"Did she tell you why?"

"No, she came; she cried, and I prepared her a room, and she fell asleep almost instantly." The defender hummed, trying to understand everything.

~~~~~

You spent almost all the week at Laura, sometimes leaving to see your mom, who still lived in Frankfurt. After that week, you made your way back to Wolfsburg. The rest of the season was not really better because you finished second, just behind Bayern, and lost against Barcelona in the Champions League final.

Because of the situation with Lena and because Wolfsburg was not too excited to make you sign a new contract, when Frankfurt proposed to you to join them, you accepted instantly. This move made you distance yourself from Lena for a long period of time. But things couldn't stay like that when you had your national camp.

At camp, it was clear that your situation with the Wolfsburg player. You knew it because of some glare some players sent to her when you arrived. Thankfully for you, you were quickly dragged away by Jule and a few Bayern players. While you were distracted, Laura made her way to Lena with an unreadable face.

"Oh, ooh, someone is about to get killed right now." Lina said, alerting Alexandra.

The two younger women walk away from any attention before coming back a few minutes later. Lena had a rather scared expression, while Laura seemed satisfied.

Whatever your best friend told your ex-girlfriend, it made her stay away from you for at least a few days. But being on the same team meant that sometimes you had to face her. Thankfuly, every time you did, you were not alone. Since a few weeks now, you have spent all your free time with Sydney when you were not stuck with Laura.

Seeing this started to make Lena obviously jealous. It was so obvious that Merle and Alex had to keep an eye on the younger Wolfsburg player to be sure she didn't do something stupid.

~~~~~

What should be something rather private, started to worry the team when yours and Lena's performances on the pitch were worse than they should be. It was clear that things between you started to invade the professional side, and you felt bad for that because your teammates shouldn't have to suffer from that.

After the last game before the trip to Ocenia for the World Cup, you were requested by your captains in your and Laura's room.

"What's going on here?" You asked when you saw your ex-Wolfsburg captain on your bed.

"Y/n, we need to talk." Svenja told you gently, but you could sense that she was not really happy about whatever would happen.

You sat in front of them, waiting for one of them to start to speak, but your door got opened before that.

"Oh, sorry." Lena said when she saw you and your confused expression.

"No, Lena, stay here. We need to talk to you too." Alex said. The midfielder awkwardly sat between her two teammates. "Do you have any idea why we asked you to come here?" The tall captain asked, receiving two confused faces plus a groan from you.

"Okay, maybe we should ask others too." Svenja said, and you didn't have time to question it until your door burst open and all your teammates were there.

"What the hell are you doing here?" you asked.

"The real question is, why do we have to be there?" Sara asked, visibly tired; she just woke up from a nap.

"Sorry, Sara, I promise that we will not bother you after that, but it's really important." Svenja said.

"Oh, are we finally talking about the elephant in the room?" Jule asked before sitting next to Svenja.

"So, who wants to say it?" Alex's question earned a lot of raised hands. "I think you should do it, Laura." The captain said all the other girls whined or groaned in deception. Now your attention was on your best friend.

"You guys are terrible." Laura started referring to you and Lena. "We know that there is a whole problem between you; nobody can miss it. But we think that there are a lot of things that you didn't say to each other, and that starts to affect the team. So, I think you need to work on that because I promise you that it starts killing us to see you unable to connect on and off the pitch." The Frankfurt player explained, earning a nod from everyone, confirming what she said.

You and Lena look at each other. It was the first time you really looked at her since the breakup, and it's useless to say that despite what happened, you couldn't deny that she was still the same girl you fell in love with. The midfielder couldn't deny that either. When everyone noticed the looks, they took their clues and left you to talk.

The silence was a little cringe at first, but she knew she had to say something. "I'm sorry," she started. "I shouldn't act like that. I knew how you felt about being yelled at, and I still did that. I'm sorry, really."

"It's okay." You accepted her apology rather quickly, which seemed to surprise her. "But..." Of course there was a 'but'; there is always one. "You still need to apologize for something else." You reminded her.

The brunette looked at you for a moment, then quickly looked around the room. "I'm also sorry to believe that you cheated on me with Laura. I know that you hate when people ship on you, but I still use that to break up with you because I couldn't take all the pressure." She stopped for a moment, and her eyes started to shine. "I should have talked with you instead of ending this. I couldn't find peace for a few weeks after this day." 

You moved to sit next to her and grab her hand. "I accept your apology, but it really hurt me. And it was from you, so it was even worse. I loved you; no, I still love you because even after that, it is almost impossible to hate you. I don't know about you, but I really want to try again, but before that, you need to promise me to talk to me when things start to get too much." You finished by wiping her baby tears and leaving a kind kiss on her cheek.

"Yes, I promise you." She replied immediately, making you laugh. "Wait, you really want to try again despite everything?" she asked when she finally understood what you said.

"Yes, but before that, you need to prove that you deserve it and also apologize to Laura." You said before standing up and escorting her to the door.

"Wait, can I still ask you if I can pick you up tomorrow for a date?" It was really quick, but you had to admit that her confidence was one of the reasons you admired her. When you nodded, her face suddenly shone. "Okay, it's a date then." She clarified before selling the deal with a quick kiss on your lips.

[strongheartneteyam]

[ credits of the Neteyam pic go to cinetrix ]

Champagne Problems

Part 6

Pairing: Neteyam Sully x female!human!reader

CW: a lot of angst, tension between neteyam and reader, heartbroken neteyam, sexual tension, heartbroken reader, insecure neteyam, jealous reader, neteyam just won't leave reader's head, hurt/comfort (?), TRIGGER WARNING for some sensitive themes like reader showing signs of low self steem and not thinking she's worth it, friend group dynamic among reader, adeline and kate, kiri being sweet, reader misses neteyam and regrets dumping him, reader thinks she's protecting neteyam from hurt by staying away from him, spider makes an appearance, kiri being protective over neteyam's feelings, reader tells kiri she likes neteyam. Tell me if there's more, pls.

Here I come, finally updating this incredibly angsty fanfiction :') I hope y'all enjoy this. Writing this fic breaks my heart, guys… it feels raw, honestly. Maybe I'm just speaking like this bc I'm on my period + I'm listening to a sad Taylor Swift song but omg my heart aches rn

Not proofread. I'm sorry, babies, I'm dead rn. So freaking sleepy and finishing this at 5 am bc my mind just wouldn't let me sleep and kept forcing me to think about and write this chapter.

Part 5: The sand hurts my feelings

𓇼

It hits different 'cause it's you

I used to switch out these Kens, I'd just ghost

Rip the Band-Aid off and skip town like an asshole outlaw

Freedom felt like summer then on the coast

Now the sun burns my heart and the sand hurts my feelings

And I never don't cry at the bar

Yeah, my sadness is contagious

Hits Different (Taylor Swift)

𓇼

"Hey." Neteyam greeted you in a dry tone. He found it hard to look into your eyes so he just gazed rapidly into them and then kept his eyes on the ground.

His heart was broken, aching and his pride was shattered. Neteyam hated to see everybody around him looking at him with pity in their faces, knowing that he had been dumped by the girl he loved. He wondered if the boys - Lo'ak, Rotxo and Ao'nung - looked down on him now. Neteyam suddenly felt like he was not a good hypothetical mate. He had always thought he would make a good, reliable and loving mate to the girl he would one day choose to be his but you made him start doubting that after last night. He knew it was probably stupid but still he couldn't seem to get rid of those feelings.

You tried to hide your uneasiness but it was written all over your face.

"Hi." You answered Neteyam, your heart pounding in your chest, anxiety leaving your hands cold.

The pain you were causing Neteyam could be easily seen in the way his jaw clenched, in the way he weirdly looked insecure instead of confident as he always seemed to be. You wanted to say "I'm sorry", you wanted to say "Maybe I did the wrong thing when I refused to become your mate" but you had seen him with Munì. It was useless now, anyway.

Lo'ak looked at Neteyam, then back at you and then he would redo the whole thing all over again, like he was waiting for the both of you to exchange more words. Poor thing. He seemed even more tense than Neteyam and you.

"Rotxo, Ao'nung" Neteyam rapidly called, looking now at the Metkayina boys "Tonowari is waiting for us. Clan business." His voice was serious and seemed slightly annoyed, his face stern 

You wondered if Neteyam said "clan business" instead of giving more detail because you were sitting there too and he was mad at you. Well, you didn't blame him if that's how he felt. You deserved it. You could have been nicer to him this morning.

"Let's go!" Lo'ak spoke loudly, like he was trying to get out of that awkward situation as fast as he could

"Chill out, forest boy. We're going." Ao'nung teased and Rotxo laughed 

"I'm Metkayina now, fish lips. Stop calling me that." Lo'ak responded 

Frenemies indeed.

The boys left and your gaze was fixed on Neteyam's back as he walked away next to the other Metkayina. As you looked down at the beach floor, you wished that ache inside you would just vanish but life doesn't work that way.

When you looked up, you saw Tsireya's and Kiri's big feline eyes fixed on your face. It scared the crap out of you. They seemed even wider now.

"What?!" You sounded legitimately startled

"Neteyam told me and Lo'ak he was gonna ask you to be his mate at the party." Kiri stated

"And how the hell did every person in this tribe find out about that? Did he tell them too?" You didn't mean to sound rude but you really were overwhelmed by the situation

"It's just me, my brother and Rotxo. Only we know, other than Kiri and Lo'ak. My stupid brother overheard Kiri asking Neteyam how it had went, what answer you had given to Neteyam and he told Rotxo. I saw them laughing like idiots and asked what was so funny. That's when Ao'nung told me." Tsireya said, like she was sorry about the fact that so many people knew about yours and Neteyam's intimate business

𓇼

The day after that, you and the girls went back to Hell's Gate. You decided it was better to leave things the way they were. To let Neteyam have a nice, healthy and proper relationship with someone of his own kind. Like your father always used to say, na'vi and humans will never be equal. But he meant it in a derogatory way, with prejudice against the na'vi in his words while you meant something totally different. It was just natural that na'vi would marry other na'vi, not a human. The differences between both cultures did not just speak loud, they actually shouted like a mad person. You knew you could never get accustomed to being a na'vi male's mate. Not even if that male was Neteyam and just thinking about leaving him behind, thinking that you felt absolutely nothing for him, made you feel a burning, painful sensation in your heart. And of course Neteyam would be better off with an emotionally stable mate. Munì seemed perfect for him. 

You totally did not feel anger boiling inside your guts anytime you thought about her stupid smiles and giggles back when she was talking to him at the beach. She would make him happy and you were totally happy for them. The next step for you would be actually believing the words you just thought.

𓇼

One month and a few days had passed. You felt grateful that you had been able to dodge all the demands to go conduct scientific researches on the Metkayina tribe that you had received until now, asking to exchange positions with colleagues and staying in the lab, doing paperwork instead. You were doing everything in your power to avoid Neteyam. But you could never seem to be able to avoid the pain that washed over your body and the tears that wanted to come out - but never actually did because you were always strong enough to hold them back - whenever a sad love song started playing in your earbuds or in one of your friend's phones. It seemed like every fucking dumb love song reminded you of him.

After Kiri sent you a message almost begging you to go visit her, making you feel guilty and saying that she missed you a lot and now that she had her own marui, you just had to go to the reef and see it, you couldn't say "no". She was being too adorable and you missed her too. You asked Kiri if Kate and Adeline could come along and she excitedly agreed, so, the three of you used your next couple of days off to travel to the Metkayina beach again. It was a blessing that Neteyam had traveled to the Omatikaya tribe to see his grandmother Mo'at and was gonna be gone for a while, as Kiri had guaranteed you.

Kiri always had a very human side to her, just like Lo'ak. Neteyam didn't even seem like he was half human at times. He was extremely proud to be na'vi and wore his indigenous culture with honor all over himself. You could never see Neteyam asking to have his own place. He was too attached to his family - and you thought that was extremely cute. It wasn't traditional amongst the na'vi for an unmated young girl to leave her family's marui like that but Kiri was clever and she found a way to get what she wanted out of her parents.

𓇼

Adeline, Kate and you woke up as early as the Pandoran skies got clear and dragged your sleepy and tired asses to the Metkayina tribe. Being a scientist would never not leave a person overworked and exhausted. Like most mornings, you had drank way too much caffeine already for such an early hour in the day.

"Girl, how do you always look so beautiful? I could never." You pointed out as you watched Adeline make two thin braids to frame her round, delicate face and put her black curly hair in a voluminous bun on the top of her head, while the both of you were inside the science team's helicopter, heading to the Metkayina reef.

You had always found Adeline extremely pretty with her dark skin, voluptuous figure and feminine style. She always made sure to look cute.

"I don't know. I guess I'm God's favorite." She joked around and the both of you started to laugh

Adeline was also funny. She could put a smile in your face anytime, even when you were sad. You considered her a sister from another mother.

"You guys are stupid." Kate teased as she was laughing too and holding an energy drink filled with caffeine in her pale hand. She'd drink those often to help wake her up.

Kate's long, blonde, wavy hair fell gracefully over her chest. Her eyes were blue and she was tall and had an athletic but slim body. Damn, you only had breathtaking friends.

𓇼

Kate and Adeline had decided to take a nap after lunch in Kiri's marui and they asked if you would come too but you refused as you were far too restless to be able to sleep. That beach brought back too many memories…

So, now you found yourself sitting in the sand, watching the ocean waves break as they hit the shore with Kiri by your side. She had managed to make you say the truth about why you seemed so troubled.

"Yeah, (y/n), you fucked up big time." Kiri stated with that aura of wisdom beyond her years that only herself knew how to effortlessly exude.

You wanted to dig a hole in the sand under your feet and jump inside of it, hiding and never coming back up again. Of course you'd fuck it up with Neteyam. You had a cursed tendency to self sabotage. You did not know if being so freaking aware of it made you better or if it actually made you worse.

"Are you mad at me?" You ask nervously with furrowed eyebrows 

"(y/n)! It's not my feelings that you should be worried about! It's not my heart that you broke." Kiri scolded you as she looked at you with those big feline yellow eyes like she was actually horrified. You felt so bad for thinking it was kind of funny. "I know you don't wanna be Neteyam's mate but do you not care about him at all? Not even a little bit? He hasn't been the same ever since you dumped him and left. Poor thing can barely go train with dad. I think I saw him sniffing while hiding one of these days. Eywa knows that prideful teylu" (edible Pandoran bug) "would never cry in front of us."

"I swear I didn't mean to be cruel. I just did not know… how to react. It was sudden, you know? It's like, I don't know… a cultural shock? Humans don't go around asking people they just met to marry them. Or… become their mates." It would never feel normal to say "mates" to you

Apparently you had acted just like Kat Stratford in 10 Things I Hate About You, when she would cold heartedly refuse Patrick Verona over and over again. You used to always watch that vintage movie with Tracy. It was one of her favorites. 

"Don't act like it was the first time you two had met. Neteyam stared at you all the time when you came to our tribe. I swear to Eywa I've never seen him nervous to talk to a girl before but you have a power over my brother… it's fucking crazy to watch actually. He's like a needy, dumb dog drooling over you when he looks at you. It's even freaky." Kiri couldn't hold it back so she burst into laughter, hiding her mouth with her big but delicate hand

You were nervous as fuck but you started to laugh too. It seemed like the nervousness and guilt and tense vibe of the situation only made it worse, making everything even more funny and absurd.

"You know the worst part of it all?" You looked at her like a child who just broke their mom's most precious vase

"Great Mother, don't tell me there's more." Kiri said, incredulous

"I think I like Neteyam." You confessed like you were a good catholic girl confessing her sins to a priest

"You like him?!" She almost screamed

"You don't need to declare it out loud for the whole reef to hear!" You got slightly mad

"You teylu!" She smirked as she moved her head from side to side in disapproval "Why the hell did you dump him then?"

"I don't know, Kiri. Don't judge me, okay?" You put both your hands over your face, hiding it and moving your head from side to side yourself this time. 

At least you knew your attitude had been controversial and confusing to say the least. They say the first steps to recovery are realizing and admitting you're insane.

𓇼

It was now eclipse. You were inside Kiri's home with her and your human friends. Kate and Adeline were finishing unpacking their bags.

"Guys, I'm going out for some fresh air, okay?" You said, trying to find an excuse to get out of that marui filled with girls - human and na'vi.

"You've been acting weird lately." Adeline pointed out "Spending too much time alone."

Kiri discreetly looked at you with a look of concern in her face, as she was the only one of the girls who knew the reason behind your strange demeanor.

"I just need some air. I'll be back soon." You spoke as you walked towards the door of the marui

"Don't go in the ocean! It could be dangerous!" Kate yelled. She was the "mom friend" of the group.

"I know!" You laughed "I'm not stupid. I'm a scientist too. But thanks for your concern."

You walked through the beach for a while, trying to take a certain tall, handsome blue alien out of your mind when you saw Spider walking in the area too. He waved at you and you waved back.

You weren't as close to Spider as you were to Kiri and Lo'ak but you did love his company.

You sat on the sand with him, looking at the ocean, just like you had done with Kiri earlier and you two started to catch up and eventually the talk got deeper, more philosophical.

"Don't you feel crazy, Spider? Living among beings of another species? Don't you feel… left out?" Your eyes looked at him with genuine doubt in them

"I do, sometimes." He sighs "Especially because of how Mrs Sully acts towards me, at times" the both of you laughed quickly "But this place is my home. I was born in Pandora, I know nowhere else that I could call home. And also, I grew up around Lo'ak, Kiri, Neteyam and Tuk. They're family to me, even if not related by blood. It doesn't really matter in the end, family are the ones who are there for you. Not your bloodline." 

"Oh my God, I totally agree!" You rapidly say in a slight loud tone, chuckling, like you wanted to emphasize how much you shared the same opinion with him

"So..." You pondered if you should tell him or not "Neteyam talked to me last-"

"Yeah, I know. Ao'nung told me." Spider interrupted

"Of course he did..." You rolled your eyes and sighed. So everybody knew already...

Spider chuckled softly.

"Anyways, Neteyam calls me tawtute. I think it's funny that he calls me "human", but in na'vi"

"Yeah, that's him being affectionate towards you. He likes you. A lot." Spider pointed out

You stoped smiling and your heart started feeling painful.

"He probably hates me now, actually. I totally blew it off. I was really insensitive towards him." Shame and regret covered your face, as you were crestfallen

"Have you ever thought about apologizing?"

"Yeah, of course I have. Many times. I just…" You hesitated "I guess I can't face him now."

"Oh, c'mon. I know you can do it. Isn't it worse to be feeling guilty and sad and let Neteyam think you don't feel sorry for hurting him?"

"You have a point, Spider. God, I hate it when you're right." You laughed and slapped his arm softly, in a playful manner

𓇼

Adeline and Kate slept peacefully next to you, each one of them in a different mat - but the three mats had been placed next to the other. You, on the other hand, hadn't been able to sleep well in almost two months. Kiri told you and the girls she was gonna stay up and she now was, at the corner of the marui, making herself a new beaded necklace in the light of a tiny fire she had lit up.

As you laid quietly in your mat with your eyes closed but wide awake, you heard footsteps inside the marui. You could not believe it when you opened your eyes and you saw it was Neteyam. His tall, slender figure and head full of thin braids that danced in the air as he moved made you recognize him immediately, even in the dark of the eclipse.

Damn! Wasn't he supposed to be in the Omatikaya tribe right now? And what the hell was he even doing here instead of going to his parents' marui?

𓇼

Taglist:

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