#anyways im gonna throw myself out a window now

[starlitcrows]

baptismal flame or hellfire?

[meiozis]

getting a pay reduction next month and then getting laid off in october damn fuck this year 😍

[evie-sturns]

𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 - 𝘾𝙝𝙧𝙞𝙨 𝙎𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙤

summary: chris shows up at your window after an argument, you tell him to go away, but hes reluctant.

contains: smut, rough sex, swearing, teasing, slight spanking ,orgasm denial, aftercare!

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its only been a day since me and chris's argument, but to be honest, i'm already missing him. a lot.

i lie in bed, wearing panties and one of chris's shirts which he left at my house previously. my house feels strangely empty, its uncomforting.

i look up from my dimly lit phone, at my clock, resting on the wall 11:45pm. i roll over in bed, placing my phone down and resting my puffy eyes.

my heart drops, loud clanging noises echo from outside my window. i sit up quickly, grabbing my phone. my heart thumps as i hear footsteps on the metal roof. "fuck fuck fuck.." i whisper to myself as i stand up out of bed.

the footsteps abruptly stop, and then i hear a few soft taps on my window. i suck a deep breath in before approaching my window, pulling open the curtains.

my eyes widen, chris is staring back at me. i let out a loud scream as he looks at me.

after a few seconds of collecting myself i angrily open the window "what the fuck are you doing here!" i whisper. "can we talk.. please?" chris says calmly. i shake my head before slamming my window down and yanking my curtains shut.

i throw myself back into bed, wrapping myself in the covers as i feel tears well in my eyes. just the sight of him makes me upset.

im expecting to hear his footsteps disappear, but instead i hear dead silence from outside my window, followed by a loud thump and the bushes rustling.

did chris just fall off my roof into the flower garden.

a small smirk plays at my lips, of course, chris sturniolo fell off my roof.

after a few minutes, i hear the metal clanging of my roof for the second time tonight. hes back.

his footsteps stop, then more taps on my window. i sigh before dragging myself out of bed, and yanking my curtains back open. this time hes holding a single flower, with a sorry look painted on his face.

i open my window "go away chris." i mumble "please let me in, im not going away." he sighs as he grips the daisy in his palm.

i stare at him for a few seconds before opening my window, i take a step back, allowing him inside my room.

he climbs inside, chris is covered in dirt and grass, his hair is stuck to his forehead as he stares at me. just now i realise what i'm wearing.

he sticks a hand straight out, offering me the flower. i try to hold back the smile which is tugging at my lips as i take it, placing it on my bedside table. chris's cheeks flush as he looks me up and down.

"wearin' my shirt while we're mad at each other hm?" he says playfully, trying to lighten the mood. "fuck off." i mumble.

"look, im so sorry about yesterday. if i'm being honest i was totally in the wrong." he says, fidgeting with his nails.

"i know." i bite back as i look up at him.

he tuts before shaking his head. "look, i didn't just come here to fuck, i want to genuinely apologise."

"who said we were gonna fuck?" i say, folding my arms. without another word he walks over to me, picking me up by my thighs before slamming me down on the matress.

"i did, cause those panties are turning me the fuck on." he growls as he yanks them down. i moan lightly as he reaches between my legs, "pathetic, wet all over your thighs hm?"

i groan as he pulls of my shirt, toying with my breasts "chris.. stop teasing" i whine impatiently.

"maybe if you didn't have such a fucking attitude, you'd already be taking my cock by now." he says as he rubs my clit lightly, i buck my hips up, desperate for pressure. "needy, aren't you." he sighs as he unbuckles his belt.

"turn around." he demands "go on, on your hands and knees."

my eyebrows furrow, but i comply anyways. he grabs my ankles, pulling me to the edge of the bed.

smack

his belt collides with my ass, "chris!" i yelp as he rubs where he just spanked me "you want pressure, you're getting fucking pressure." he groans.

smack

his belt lightly smacks my clit from behind, causing my eyes to water. i let out a soft whimper, before i can open my mouth again i hear his jeans drop the the floor. i arch my back even more on the bed, my chest pressing against the matress as i look over my shoulder.

"fuck!" i yell as he slams into me, giving me no chance to adjust to his size, he thrusts into me, hitting deeper and deeper each time. the room fills with my screams of pleasure and chris's grunts. i grip the pillows as my eyes pour tears from the intensity, without warning i clench around chris, orgasming.

he quickly pulls out, painting my back with white ribbons. i collapse onto my stomach as chris flops down next to me before rolling me onto him. my head buries in his neck as he holds my ass tightly, the tears slow as i catch my breath.

"im so sorry baby, are you okay? was i too rough?" he says frantically. hes met with no response, just a small groan. "hey hey, talk to me please." chris says rubbing my back. "just intense.." i whisper "really good though.." i continue.

we lie in silence for a few minutes before i break it.

"chris?"

"mhm?" he whispers

"did you fall off my roof earlier?" i ask

"possibly.."

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omg this was lowkey freaky for me but hope yall enjoyed!!

[xo-cori]

hi um can i request smthn abt dina crushing readers head with her thighs while they eat her out <3 and reverse cowgirl with her. making her bounce on your lap. UGGGHHHNGH im so down bad for her.

hands on your knees, angelina jolie

pairing: dina woodward x fem!reader

summary: you’ve become addicted to the feeling of her body beneath yours. more specifically, her unassumingly strong thighs.

warnings: smut (MDNI), reader is definitely a munch 😁

a/n: HEYY i only did the first part bc i’m not exactly comfy writing about straps/any dicklike thing in general BUT I HOPE U LIKE ANYWAYS!!!

Her moans fill the dimly lit room, moonlight creeping in from the window that shines a ghostly light across her tan, freckled skin. It’s the middle of the night and she’s pliant underneath your touch. Her fingers make a mess of your hair, her bare chest rises and falls in rapid motion, and her thighs… well, you’d be content to die this way if she happened to break your jaw.

They clench down around the sides of your face, spasming and shivering. Her wetness soaks your chin and the wrinkled bedsheets below. You’ve been at it for well over an hour, yet have made no attempt to pull away or gasp for air. You simply don’t want to– and even if you did, Dina does too good a job of holding you in place until she’s had enough.

“Jus’ like that,” she purrs, looking down to see the way you’re bent down between her legs, ass up in the heavy air, giving her a proper show. “You’re so good to m-me… fuck!”

Your hands come down to her knees, encouraging her to fully close them behind your head as you hum in agreement. The vibrations cause her to throw her head back against the pillows behind her. Your tongue languidly licks up and down her petal-soft folds, jaw aching so badly you’re sure that it’ll be hard to chew the next day, but it’s all worth it when you feel her thighs tighten around your head once more and nearly pull the hair out of your head. Her back arches off of the bed while you open your clouded eyes to look up at her, watching intently as you lick another gentle orgasm out of her; her third one of the night. You sigh into her contently, scooping up all of her cum with your tongue so that you can savor the taste before she weakly pulls you off of her.

“Come here,” Dina breathes, not entirely sure her body even belongs to her anymore.

You crawl up to straddle her hips, leaning down to kiss her properly– she can taste herself on your lips, on your tongue, and she feels the slick that coats your chin. It takes all of her willpower to not jump your tired bones right then and there. Her arms limply wrap around your neck, all of that strength finally gone now that you’d drained all the energy she had. “Maybe one day you’ll actually crush my head.” You laugh against her lips, making her pull away with a gasp.

“Don’t even joke about that.” She demands, cheeks darkening with an obvious embarrassment.

“I’m not joking. You know how happy I’d be to die between your legs?” You sigh dreamily as you collapse on the bed beside her. Dina covers her eyes with her forearm and huffs.

“I’m already not gonna be able to walk tomorrow,” she groans, “so I don’t know where I’ll find the strength to do that.”

“Do what? Crush my skull like a watermelon?” You tease, laughing as she playfully smacks your arm. “It’s fine. I’ll just wait ‘til you’re back in one piece, then get back to hoping.”

Dina turns her head to look at you with a suggestive grin. “You know what? That’s awful, but still kinda turning me on.”

“Really?” You quickly prop yourself up on your arm, a hopeful tone in your voice. “We can go again, I just might have to use my fingers ‘cause my jaw is fucking done for–”

She cuts you off by moving to lay on her side and placing her arm around your waist, forcing you back down to lay with her. A soft smile graces her lips when she feels your hand come up to rub the soreness from her lower back. “You really tuckered me out, horn-dog.”

“Tuckered myself out, too. I’ll wash the sheets in the morning,” you say before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

For now, all you can do is doze off into a blissfully deep sleep and hope that you remembered to lock the front door.

[sorrowsofsilence]

Burning Out • Teaser

I was lost, but now I'm found Under the lights and in the sounds So let us sing and sing it loud That we're not perfect, but we're proud of who we are

Noah Sebastian is lost. His crime-filled lifestyle is anything but perfect; but everything changes once he meets you.

Noah Sebastian x Fem!Reader

General Warnings: explicit content, smut 18+, mentions of drugs, alcohol, murder, other forms of crime, violence.

Authors note: hiiii. This story was requested by an anon a while back and I have decided to try and give it a shot (Prompt given was: Noah and the boys have a tough life and steal to make it by, and live in a motel room together. Meets reader and ends up breaking into her house unknowing.) I hope this vibes with what you wanted! <3 I have no idea how many chapters this will be, im just kinda gonna go with the flow!

Here’s the beginning of the chapter, just to see if anyone’s interested :3

NOAH

The world was always in a state of grey, the life of the concrete jungle persistently sucking out the souls of its inhabitants with every passing second. Destruction. Crime. Greed. A shattering abyss of capitalism and corruption.

Yet, I don’t think I was meant to be the good guy in this lifetime.

Maybe someday, in another universe, there would be a possibility for me.

But for now, the only thing I could think about was how my heart pounded as the gun sat between my fingers, threatening the innocent ahead.

Destruction, Crime, Greed.

“Noah, let’s go,” Ruffilo desperately pulled at my wrist in an attempt to drag me away. My arm remained still, held in its position, resisting his force.

The woman’s eyes watched me in horror, tears brimming as her back hit the brick wall behind her, arms wrapping protectively around her body in defeat.

My heart raced, yet I couldn’t move.

“I won’t say anything I swear,” She pleaded, lips trembling, saliva foaming from her mouth as she was too afraid to swallow.

I don’t want to do this, but I fucked up.

“Noah,” Ruffilo said through gritted teeth, “We need to go,” he placed a hand on top of my gloved one, in another attempt to have me lower the bad decision.

I closed my eyes, squeezing them shut in contemplation as my chest heaved, the voice of rationality fighting against the voice of destruction.

You’ve never been able to kill anyone before you moron, why do you think this time will be any different?

My eyes snapped open, leathered finger dancing along the trigger as I stared at her. My teeth barred through chapped lips, a snarl of frustration crawling from my throat as the woman's eyes turned away in fear; as if watching her demise would kill her.

Seeing her in complete terror left me broken. Is this who I am?

The next thirty seconds passed as though I was walking through molasses, my thoughts battling contradictions before I audibly screamed in frustration, shoving the gun back into my pocket as Nicholas and I ran towards the van.

“Fuck!” I yelled, slamming the car door as forceful as possible. The tires squealed in place, burning out as Jolly’s foot pounded onto the gas pedal.

I ripped off my ski mask, throwing it angrily onto the floor of the vehicle.

“You should’ve just left her Noah. Now if they find us we could be charged with assault with a weapon.” The deep Swedish accent was the last thing I wanted to hear. He eyed me sternly in the rearview mirror, and I lingered on his gaze for a moment before turning my head towards the window.

“Oh Fuck off Jolly,” I sighed angrily, closing my eyes as my breathing quickened, the anxiety beginning to set in. The pounding of my heart began to vibrate along my entire chest, and my leg bounced in anticipation, waiting for the panic to subside.

I kept justifying to myself that we’re all dead anyway, so what’s the difference between a God and a loaded gun?

The van sped through the city's veins, a blur of neon and shadows. I felt Ruffilo's eyes digging into me, a mix of disappointment and concern as he watched my tapping fingers against the plastic of the car door. Another fuck up added to the list.

The silence in the vehicle was deafening, broken only by the occasional honk of a distant car or the screech of tires against wet asphalt.

"We need to lay low for a while," Jolly's voice cut through the tension. "I know a place on the outskirts we can hang out at ‘till everything cools down. It’s not pretty, but it'll do."

I nodded absent-mindedly, my thoughts still with the woman we'd left behind. Her terrified eyes haunted me, a stark reminder of the monster I was becoming. Or perhaps had always been.

As we drove further from the city center, the buildings grew more dilapidated, the streets emptier. The grey world outside mirrored the turmoil that had taken over my thoughts, reminding me of the emptiness that seemed to follow me everywhere.

+++++

Chapter One: The Apparition

I'll leave the prompt given below.

“BUT what about a Noah fic where him and the boys grew up with a hard life, but they always stuck together. Growing up they got into a lot of trouble, and they are still struggling. So they all live in a little motel room together. Then one day Noah runs into reader, and she’s new to LA and she also grew up with a bad background but she got away from it and worked her ass off to get a nice little house in LA. So they talk for a bit and get along with each other, they swap numbers and stuff. Then one night it’s noah get money for him and the boys. So he decides to break into a house and just steal some stuff so he can sell it for money. BUT he ends up breaking into readers house by accident, and she catches him. She hurt and scared at first, but then she starts kind of sympathizing for him. He is apologizing profusely to her telling her he didn’t know it was her house, and basically they have a conversation about Noah’s life with the boys, and why he does what he does. And basically they end up falling for each other, and after a while reader realizes how lonely she is living in her house alone in LA with no friends. So she tells noah that him and the boys should move in with her, and she would help them find jobs and stuff. Eventually they agree, and then after they move in she notices how much they love music and that the two nicks both have old acoustic guitars that they occasionally play while Noah songs along. She works at a bar and then ends up getting them a gig at her work, and then after they play there a few times they start blowing up on the internet and getting popular, then eventually they get huge and go on tour. When they become famous they all convince reader to go on tour with them so they can start taking care of her like she did them when they needed it the most.”

[sunrisemill]

✮From the start✮ pt.3

Chris and y/n have always been inseparable, they’ve always relied on each other but what happens when one of them falls?

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.4 Finale

Chris’ pov

(2 months ago)

I toss and turn in my bed but can’t shake off this horrible feeling. She's been acting weird and distant lately, I feel like I don't know her anymore…are we still friends? The other day we were watching a movie on my couch, and she looked so sleepy. I couldn't help myself, I put my arm around her and the only way I could describe the look on her was pure horror. Did I do something wrong? Did I go too far? Did I smell or something? I groan into my pillow as those thoughts flood my brain. I have to talk to her. I rip the blanket off of my body and slowly sit up “Alright Grandpa. Do you need help with that?” I feel my lips curl up into a small smile at the memory. She never did give me a break, god forbid I'd let out the TINIEST noise bending over “You okay Grandpa?.” “Do I need to take you to the nursing home already?” Her voice rings through my head as I stand up, I glance over at the alarm clock on my bedside table, 12:22 it reads. God, I hope she’s awake. I can't go on like this anymore.

~~~~~

“Y/n.” I whisper-shout as I stand below her window. I know she’s up cause she has her lamp on “I bet she’s blasting her music, that girl’s gonna go deaf.” I grumble to myself. I smirk as an idea comes to mind, I pick up a small pebble and throw it towards her window creating a small tap noise. “Oh, my precious Y/n. I cannot bear another second without your gracious company.” I say in the most dramatic tone I can come up with. Not long after that I hear the sound of a squeaky window being opened. “Now what the actual hell was that?” I grin as she pokes her head out of the window. God, she looks beautiful… “what? I thought you liked corny shit like that. You're always making me watch that cheesy ass rom-com, what was it now… 12 going on 22?” I ask in a teasing voice. Of course, I know it's 13 going on 30, how could I ever forget her favourite movie? I even watched it without her so I could memorize the wedding scene that she does not stop talking about. “Haha, Chris. You're so funny.” she replies with a PAINFULLY sarcastic tone. “Why are you here anyway?” I take in a deep breath. “I wanted to talk to you, could you maybe…come down here, my neck hurts.” I watch her let out a soft chuckle as she retreats her head back, she's gonna come outside and I'm gonna have to do one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. She can't hate me…can she? I mean, she could after this. Y/n hasn't always been the best at expressing her emotions or telling me how she feels, she just shuts down. My thoughts get interrupted by the sound of her back door sliding open. I don't know how she does it, she could be wearing a trash bag for all I care and she would still take my breath away. “Hey…” I whisper as my voice fails me. “Hi?” I watch as she hugs her body to shield herself from the cold. “I was just- I was wondering…are you okay?” Her body stiffens and I just think…oh shit. “I'm fine, Chris. Why wouldn't I be?” The coldness in her voice could send a chill down anyone’s spine “Y/n, I can tell when there’s something wrong. Why can’t you talk to me?  Im here for you.” I take a step toward her but she steps back. C'mon Y/n, don't do this to me. Let me in. Just talk to me. I silently plead to her as her face contorted into a look of annoyance. “I've told you a hundred times already. I am fine. Why can't you comprehend that I don't need a saviour. It's 1 am, go home and sleep like a normal person for once in your goddamn life.” My breath catches in my throat as her tone gets more and more cold as she speaks. What happened to the Y/n that I know? The one I fell in love with… “you know what…” I swallow as I feel tears brimming my eyes. “Im done dealing with this. I care about you but you couldn't give two shits even if you wanted to. Do you know what you are Y/n? A fucking coward! Oh, how dare somebody show even the littlest bit of concern for you. I bet you’ll just forget about me, You'll get a new best friend and fuck it up the same way cause you're too much of a pussy to confront your feelings. I tried helping you but you're hopeless.” I wipe away the tears that fell from my eyes and huff before storming off in a fit of rage. I slam the gate to her backyard behind me, leaving a shivering, startled Y/n behind. Even after all of that…I cant help but still love her.

(A/N: Omg this took so long to come out cause my laptop decided to break but I finally got it fixed YIPPEE!!!! I hope you'll like this cause I feel like I cooked with this. Don't ruin my confidence)

Tags: @guccifrog

[biggestsimponhere]

My beloved @kib-ble wanted a Joel bodyguard au so that’s what they’re gonna get.

Bodyguard!Joel miller x Famous!Reader AU, im sorry i couldn’t help but put a little angst between joel and ellie. it’s in my blood to make things sad. I’m also giving you famous friends from our world so don’t mind that. If you’re mad about being friends with them, idk, cry about it. (They aren’t bad people btw, just celebs i follow) I’m making you friends with the cast of the rookie. i don’t pay that much attention to celebrities but i like the rookie.

Warnings - TW! Sexual harassment/Assault (Someone grabs your ass unasked for but don’t worry joel will put him in his place) This is not tlou cannon it just has tlou characters if you don’t like it don’t read :) there are no zombies! TLOU CANNON LEVEL VIOLENCE (its really just a fist fight but yk) Sarah’s here too idgaf if she and ellie couldn’t be at the same time, don’t ask about ellie’s parents (fatal car accident 😔) (THIS IS WAY LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE OR INTENDED IT TO BE PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT MORE OR IF YOU LIKE IT)

“You know you’re not meant to run away from the person protecting you?” A voice interrupted your silence. Not just any voice. His voice. “Well i wouldn’t have to run away if i could have five minutes to myself, miller” You replied standing up. “You know it’s for your safety right? We’re not just here to bother you” He said walking over to you. “Oh trust me i know, you only remind me everyday” You said rolling your eyes. “How did you even find me anyways?” You continued turning to him. “You’re not that hard to find princess” He remarked moving closer to you. “Come on, you’ve got a dinner to get to, and some creep was lurking out there with his camera” He said sliding his hand into yours to pull you out of the room you’d hidden away in.

“Why do I even have to go to this thing anyways” You said smiling at the feeling of his hand in yours. “Because it’s important, at least that’s what your manager said” He said continuing down the hall. “Stop here” He said letting go of your hand to grab the door. Your hand felt slightly colder without his warmth but you just shook it off. “Okay, no one’s there, move, quickly” He said ushering you out the door. Walking out the door you practically ran to the car with Joel trailing close behind. Once you were safely in the car Joel told the driver where to go. “So why do you spend all your time following me around, I mean i know it’s your job, but you hardly ever switch someone” You said turning to him.

He’s been your bodyguard for years and always seems to be around. “Well it’s my job like you said, and I only have one person to get back to” He said smiling slightly. Feeling a little dejected thinking he had a girlfriend you asked who. “Ellie. I’m like her guardian or whatever, I raised her, she lives with me in a small town, but she’s grown now, doesn’t need me hovering around her” He said looking out the window. “I’m sure she’ll always need you” You said smiling at him. “Yeah, i guess, but she spends a whole lot more time with her friends than she does me. I mean we don’t even go on walks anymore. It’s just ‘Bye Joel i’m going out with Dina and Jesse’. It’s like she doesn’t need me” He said a little dejectedly.

“Well she’s a teenager right? She needs her space and I’m sure if you just asked you could spend more time together” You said reaching over to pat his knee. You were about to remove your hand when he put his over yours and held it there. “Yeah i’m sure you’re right” He said smiling at you. That was a rarity. Joel Miller barely ever smiles so you feel pretty special when he throws one your way. After that the conversation died out but you still had your hand on his knee and his was still over yours. As the car rolled to a stop he looked down remembering your hand was there and he quickly removed his. He stepped out of the car and walked to your side to open the door.

“Miss y/l/n” He said grabbing your hand to help you out of the car. Much more professional than you two had been five minutes ago. There were photographers everywhere. They all kept shouting at you to look at them and you did your best to keep up. Eventually someone came outside and ushered you and Joel and your other guard Andrew inside. Once you were inside you were led to a table full of people you either knew or recognized. “Ahh y/n, you’re here!” Melissa cheered. “That i am!” You replied hugging here. “We wondered when we were gonna see you again.” Eric said smiling at you. You slid into your seat between the two and continued talking to all of them.

“Is he gonna keep staring at us like that?” Mekia asked looking over your shoulder. You turned around to see Joel glaring at the table but softening a bit when he caught your eye. You smiled at him and then turned back, “Joel’s always like that, but he won’t do anything unless one of you tries something” You said laughing. “He doesn’t seem like he’s always like that considering he smiled after you turned away” Nathan said raising an eyebrow at you. “Now he’s right back to glaring” Mekia said laughing. Soon the food arrived and you started eating. The whole point of this event was to make friends with other actors and actresses, but really mostly people just stuck by people they already knew.

“Are you gonna come dance with us?” Alyssa said after you’d all finished eating. ��I suppose” You said pretending to be reluctant but smiling anyways. “Come on they opened the bar!” Melissa said grabbing your hand. “Well i’ll never say no to free alcohol” You said letting her pull you. After a few drinks (more like 5) you were still dancing with your friends. “Hey pretty lady” Some guy whispered in your ear as he came up behind you. This immediately caught Joel’s eye but he didn’t want to step in until it was a problem. Everything was fine, until it wasn’t. You had just silently moved away but he followed you. Once he grabbed your ass you pushed him away.

He stumbled back into a few people but came back almost immediately after he moved forward Joel was by your side. “I suggest you take a few steps back” He said pulling you behind him. “What’re you gonna do old man” The man said challenging him. Joel walked you back a little before swinging at the man. He stumbled back into the people behind him who took this opportunity to flee the dance floor leaving you, joel and the man standing in it. The man quickly threw a punch at joel which he caught and then punched the guy in the stomach. After that the man got the upperhand for a second and you were about to do something, anything but Melissa and Eric pulled you back.

“He’s okay, this what he was hired for” Melissa said to you as you continued watching them fight. Eventually after a solid punch Joel knocked the man out cold. You ran over to him grabbing his shoulders. “Fuck Joel, you’re insane, he could have killed you” You said gripping his jacket. “Probably not, but im okay, just a little sore and a few scratches” He said rubbing his hands up your arms. As you continued scolding joel security came to drag the other man out to some car to take him to the hospital. “A few scratches?! Your knuckles are bloody and scraped to hell” You said turning your attention to his hand. You were close to tears by this point.

He stopped your frantic search for more injuries by pulling you into his arms. “You hear that princess? M’hearts still beating” He whispered into your ear. You stood like that for a couple minutes before he spoke again. “Are you okay?” He said pulling you out of his chest. Of course he’s thinking of your comfort when he’s all scraped up. “Yeah, I’m okay now, let’s get you to the hospital” You said wiping your nose. “I don’t want to go to the hospital, i’ll just go home tommy and ellie can probably help me better anyways” He said shaking his head. “Joel you need to go to the hospital” You scolded him.

“Please, i don’t want to go to the hospital, just let me go home, please” He practically begged you. You’d never heard him sound like this let alone say please. “Yeah okay, but i’m coming with you” You grabbed his arm before walking over to your friends. “I’m gonna take him home, just didn’t want to leave without sayin goodbye” You said hugging your friends. Joel stood behind you while you said bye to your friends. He’s never been as fidgety as he is right now, something must be really bothering him. “Alright, let’s get you home yeah?” You said grabbing his good hand. He just nodded and wordlessly followed you out the door. Once you settled in the car and told the driver to take you to joel’s you rolled up the screen separating the back and the front.

“Joel” You said quietly unsure how to approach the problem. He hummed in response tilting his head towards you. “Are you okay?” The silence filled the car after that. You didn’t want to speak again until he said something. It took him a few minutes but he spoke again. “No, not really” He said grabbing onto your hand. You unbuckled and moved closer to him. Wrapping your arms around him you buried your face in his shoulder. Joel’s never been like this in all the years you’ve known him. You were about to speak again when you felt tears hit your chest and heard his shaky breathing. Instead of speaking you just held him tighter and let him cry into your chest.

“I’m sorry” He said finally pulling away from you. “Don’t apologize, you don’t ever have to apologize for your emotions” You said swiping his hair off his forehead. He nodded and pulled you into another hug, which you returned. “Do you wanna talk about it?” You asked quietly. “No, at least not right now” He said pulling away as the car rolled to a stop in front of joel’s. You slid out with him and stopped walking when he walked back over to the car. You didn’t hear what he said but shortly after the car pulled away leaving you both alone. “Come on, we gotta get you cleaned up” You held out your hands to him which he took. Once you both walked through the door Ellie sprung up from the couch.

She took in the both of you before speaking. “What the hell happened to you” She said scanning joel’s injuries. “It’s nothin” Joel brushed it off walking past her into the kitchen. You stood there awkwardly before joel called you into the kitchen. “I called tommy he should be here in a few minutes, would you like something to drink?” He said walking over to you. “No i’m alright” You smiled before sitting in a chair at the table. “Joel? Are you gonna tell me what happened or should i ask her?” Ellie said walking into the kitchen. “It was just a little fight, ellie i’m fine” He said brushing off her concern. “A little fight? You’re all scraped up, you haven’t had a fight in forever too” She said continuing to pester him.

You enjoyed watching the two of them interact. “Ellie i said it’s nothing” He said coming off a little harshly. She shrunk a little before stepping back. “I’m sorry kiddo, it was just a rough day” He said turning towards her. Then the door to the house opened and tommy walked in. “Joel, what the hell happened?” Tommy said walking into the kitchen. Once he stopped he spotted you. “I didn’t know you had a girlfriend?” He said turning back to joel. “Girlfriend?!” Sarah said running down the stairs. “She’s not my girlfriend, and what’re you doing here? Aren’t you meant to be at home with your family?” Joel said turning to her.

You were happy to just sit quietly and watch joel interact with the people he loves. “I told them i was gonna hang out with ellie for a little” She said brushing off his question. “Sorry to butt in but joel you’re still hurt” You said finally speaking. “Right” Tommy said reaching under the sink for the first aid kit. As tommy worked on cleaning joel in the living room, Sarah and Ellie moved to sit next to you. Joel had begrudgingly left you alone with them but not without warning them to behave. “Soooo, what’re your intentions with my dad” Sarah said first. “You can’t just ask her things like that” Ellie said cutting her off. “What do you mean?” You said finally.

“Are you together? Do you like him? Do you love him?” She said, the questions flowing out of her mouth rapidly. “No we’re not together” You we’re about to continue speaking when joel walked back in and cut you off. “Stop botherin her” He said stopping behind your chair. “We’re not bothering her, right?” Sarah said looking from her father to you. “They’re fine Joel, really.” You said looking up at him. “Did you send Drew away or is he gonna be back?” You said turning to fully face him. “He’s gone, you can stay here tonight” He said with full confidence. “But we don’t have a guest room” Ellie said looking up at him confused. “She can just sleep in my bed, i’ll sleep on the couch” Joel said sitting in the chair next to you.

“Hell no, after tonight your sleeping in your bed, i cant take that away from you” You said shaking your head. “Why don’t you just share the bed?” Sarah said looking between the two of you. “Yeah, I mean you’re both adults” Tommy said patting joel on the shoulder. “Are you okay with that?” Joel said nudging your foot with his. “Yeah, Yeah, we can handle it” You said trying not to sound to eager. “Sarah can you go to yours and grab her some clothes?” Joel turned to his daughter. “Sure!” She said standing up and leaving quickly. “Alright, i’ve gotta get back home before maria strings me up but i’ll be seeing you” Tommy said pointing to you as he left. “Can i go have a sleepover at Dina’s? I meant to ask you earlier but you weren’t home” Ellie said turning to Joel.

“Yeah go ahead” And with that Ellie got up and grabbed the bag she had apparently already packed and ran out the door. “Guess it’s just us then” Joel said chuckling awkwardly. You nodded and then the door opened again. “I only have pajama shorts, sorry, but she can borrow one of your shirts right dad?” Sarah said handing you the shorts. “Of course you can” Joel said slightly smiling. “Alright, gotta go” Sarah said turning back around and leaving. “Let’s go to bed” Joel said pulling you up and then walking you to the stairs. Once you two had reached his bedroom he walked in and pulled out a shirt for you. He handed it to you before turning around.

As you stated to take off your jewelry you remembered the zipper on the back of your dress. You tried to do it yourself but since you couldn’t even zip it yourself how did you expect to take it off. “Um, Joel?” You whispered into the room. “Yes?” He called back. “I, uh, i cant unzip it” You said too embarrassed to turn around. You heard footsteps move closer to you before stopping just behind you. You could feel his breath on your neck as he began to speak. “Do you need some help?” Your breath caught as you realized how close he is to you. You nodded and his hands moved to the zipper. His fingers brushing against your back sent sparks shooting through you.

“It’s unzipped” He said pulling you out of your thoughts. You realized he must have turned around again as you couldn’t hear his voice as clearly. You slid his shirt and the shorts on and turned back to face him. “You can look now” You said and he turned towards you. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of you in his shirt and extremely small shorts. He can’t help but think sarah did that on purpose. You both climbed into bed, as you settled in you thought to yourself how you could get used to this. Family talks, His shirts, Sleeping next to him in bed. “Joel” You said slowly. He hummed turning to look at you.

“Would you hold me?” You asked quietly. He nodded and flipped the light off before settling in behind you. He wrapped his arms around you and smiled at the feeling of finally having you in his arms even if it isn’t when he’s with you. That would be a talk for another time. “Goodnight joel” You said rolling over to face him. “Goodnight sunshine” Joel said as you snuggled into his chest. Yeah you could get used to this. And so could he.

[star-vibing-prompts]

Random shit I had or others had said as prompts.

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of sus, dark humor(probably), dark themes(also probably), Sensitive topics

----------------------------

"Motherfucker is high on cat nip at the top."

"Imma just kick this fish then-"

"Let me sleep with you!"

"STOP CREAMING YOURSELF"

"Let me throw your child!"

"I smacked a bad guy's booty."

"That was a good ass slap!"

"Give me all these delicious batteries!"

"Everybody died in this family!"

"I JUST SHOT HER BODY WITH MY GUN-"

"I DIDNT EVEN KNOW I HAD BALLS STILL!"

"I got stuff on my neck!"

"Be honest, am I hot?" "I'M GAY-"

"IMMA WHIP OUT MY BEANS ESSAY"

"Not the duckussy"

"Already sus gonna hide in the ooc"

"Okay I got my happiness, bye"

"I like me some Among Us"

"Can someone hold me please"

"[Name] stop searching. I wanna search something up to on him!"

"IS HE WRITING A FANFIC OML"

"I KNOW BUT WHEN I LAUGH I SOMEHOW CHOKE ACK-"

"You're more grosser than I am."

"Ohh~ Hee got the rizz~"

"OKAY BACK TO CRYING"

"I love dying screaming"

"IM CRYING WHAT DID WE JUST WALK IN ON???"

"I will slap myself if I say something sus"

"Let her scream lmao."

"Being force to talk by a 14 year old"

"Such a beautiful break up"

"STOP RIZZING ME"

"Anyway does anyone want to get slap by me?"

"Damn she hot"

"THE FUCK WOMAN???"

"DAMN I AM A LONELY BITCH"

"Actually *SHITTING* himself would be pooping. *PISSING* himself would be peeing."

"Why did you eat mah stick?"

"STOP EATING POOP???? WHOS POOP EVEN IS THAT???"

"I- Wha- ho- ...MY BRAIN CANT HANDLE THISI-"

"I think u just pissed him up even more"

"And why are you creaming [Name]?" "Damn tell me how you really feel about the cream jesus"

"One of them is: What the fuck is going on at this point and why am I still here for it?"

"I just love killing people!"

"I want to fuck Optimus Prime."

"Allergies are kicking me ass"

"I would've given you some but you didn't talk fast enough /j"

"[NAME] PLEASE I BE SILLY"

"I SWEAR ON [NAME] IT AINT ME"

"Why is [Name] robbing [Name2]"

"Enjoy your last peaceful moments"

"You were the chosen one"

"Then speak it"

"And [Name] just set himself on fire"

"I feel like I am being judged now,,,,,bye." *disappears*

"The shame has already been done there is no going back"

"My mom used to buy me robux before she mcfucking died"

"I BROKE MY STICK"

"THEY DONT KNOW WHAT GOES ON BEHIND CLOSED DOORS"

"My gaydar told me"

"What the fuck are smiley fries."

"Rice with beef broth because we have no chicken"

"Anime cat girls are canon within Spongebob now."

"The Cat Has Ingested The Wall"

"Split dat chicken wingg"

"Oeuur... digs chicken wing out of the carpet"

SHRIEKS AND BREAKS IN THROUGH A WINDOW

"They have been bestowed the name [New name]"

"I love the fumbling with the remote"

"Literally vibrating in my chair, I’m really excited for the game"

"That's so sad imagine someone hated you so much they wouldn't even spend more than 5 bucks to hire a hitman"

"Bro's gonna be willing to die after that"

"FLOOFY AND GOOBER"

"I wanna invite them for tea and crumpets

The best type of relationship"

"ILL FORFEIT ALL MY LEGAL POSSESSIONS TO HIM"

"Like damn dude you don't need THAT much eye liner"

"This is so emo"

"My dude needs to look fabulous"

"WHAT A GOOBER ! FOOLISH LITTLE FELLOW"

"OMG ITS MY KID"

"LIL GUY IS SPEEDY ASF"

"They got a little too silly"

"ITTY BITTY"

"They just need to put some ice on it"

"Aww noo they spilled the cranberry juice" :(

[urfavouritegirlie]

Chapter 6

(Part 6)

**The present**

Aaron POV

I recall on the memories of me and Maya from the old picture I have. The conversation I had with Miles has me really thinking about her. I really do wonder where she is now and what she could be up to. Since I have no job to do I had ordered a pizza and decided to be lazy for the night but then my phone starts buzzing. To my shock it's Jeff. I leave it and silence it. Minutes later my pizza finally arrives. I pay the delivery man and slump on the couch. My phone rings again. Him again. I sigh and pick up.

"What?"

"I called 5 times."

"And I watched ring 5 times."

"Why are you like this?"

"Cuz I'm your lil bro. Why'd you call?"

It's been a while since the two of us had talked. The last time wasn't so good either. It was about Miles being around me because I'm a bad influence to him because Jeff knows what I do.

"Rio wants you to come over on Christmas. We're gonna have a party and people are gonna be there."

"What your cop friends or sum?"

"No, family Aaron. Just be there man. Rio's been nagging me. Don't say I said that."

"Aight fine. Can't make promises tho."

Then the line cuts. Tsk. Man, this sucks. Maya would've dragged me without a doubt. Damn you Maya, why can't you just leave my head. I just miss her.

**Christmas Day**

I stand outside their apartment complex.

"UNCLE AARON, HEY"

Miles shouts from his bedroom window. I nod at him. Such a funny kid. I walk in and walk to their apartment. The door was already open with kids running in and out the place. I let myself in.

"Aaron hi, glad you could make it."

"Uh yeah, thanks for the invite Rio."

Miles almost tackles me to the ground from the side.

"Aye wassup lil man."

"Im 11 I ain't little no more but I'm good."

"All the guys are on the roof preparing the BBQ."

I walk up the stairs with Miles behind me. I open the door and there are more kids and grown adults. Downstairs was were the females were. Cooking and gossiping. The men on the roof talking, things that we talk about I guess.

"You actually came."

Jeff. I turn around and hook my arm around his neck.

"Well I can't miss a special Christmas invitation from my big bro."

Despite the distance between us, I will always love annoying the hell out of him. He shrugs his shoulder to remove my arm from him. He walks ahead with a bag of charcoal to bbq stand.

"Who's dumb idea was is to have a bbq in winter, in New York?" I ask so loosely.

"It was mine." Jeff so kindly replies;

"I figured that much."

I help out on what needs to be done, against my will. Honestly I didn't want to be here but Rio doesn't take no for an answer.

"You talked to Maya?"

I freeze for a moment and look up and shrug my shoulders.

"She calls me and Rio ya know. She's always asking about you."

I hesitate to ask but ask anyway.

"What did she say?"

"Maybe if you picked the phone you would know."

Here we go. Unwanted advice from my big bro. I roll my eyes and sigh.

"You know I can't do that."

He gives me a look and shakes his head.

"Maya is a good person, a great person even. Don't tell me you're gonna throw it away because of what you do. I know you didn't ask but I suggest you quit working for that man before something bad happens."

He's right, I can't lie, but the thing is I'm in too deep. I can't quit now because there are people who want me dead and out their way but I can't tell anyone that, not even Jeff. Being in contact with Maya would probably put her in danger. Having Jeff and his family close is a risk itself.

Jeff stopped the life of crime when we were younger, after mom passed and after we both spent a night in jail for robbery. I started hanging around with the wrong people that got me connected to Wilson Fisk. And now, I can't go back.

Maybe if I had continued that business me and Jeff had I wouldn't be in a predicament.

The party started and the music was flowing. Children of different ages playing and running around without a care in the world.

Maya had always talked about families. She used to have immense baby fever when she moved in with me. She would stare at every kid she would come across. She loved Miles like he was her own. She brought up the conversation of kids and I panicked. It was a not so good conversation. It ended in slamming doors, sleeping in the other room and tears.

How can I explain to her that bringing a child would be dangerous because of my job. That's a route I didn't want to go down. What if she would leave me for good. Even after all that she respected my decision. I honesty don't deserve her.

"Hola everybody, thanks for coming. Isn't it nice to have family for the holidays. I have a Christmas gift for everyone today. You're gonna love it."

This got everyones attention. What could she possibly have that everyone would love. Money? Nahhh.

She walks down the fire escape and small conversations emerge again. She came back as fast as she left. Everyone is now confused because she comes back empty handed.

"Well where is the present?" someone asked.

Then everyone notices another figure behind her. Then the world stops completely. Ain't no way.

"MAYA!" Everyone is rushing over to her and greeting her. She knows everyone here. No surprise. She's so likeable and approachable. Everyone loves her, well including me.

The atmosphere is filled with excitement as people are still talking to her. She lights up the room, well air with her smile. Her dimples haven't faded at all. I'm stood so still like a literal statue. Until I feel someone nudge me back to earth.

Miles.

"Huh?"

"I said go talk to her."

She's talking to people as she walks over. She's talks to someone and makes a brief glance at me with a smile. I'm not ready. I try to make an escape by turning around to get a drink or something but Rio is in the way. Giving me a look. A look with her arms crossed and shaking her head.

"What?"

Without a word she turns me back around and shoves me forward and into 'lo and behold' into Maya. She seems surprised to bump into me but I catch her out of instinct. She looks up and I look down. I'm so speechless I look like a fool.

"Uhh hey."

She attempts to hold a laugh but completely fails. She has me acting like a fool.

"Hi Aaron, how have you been?"

"I..ummm."

"Come on man don't stuttering on her now lil bro." Jeff mocks him.

"I'm doing good."

[arduadastra]

An unhinged recap of TLOU EP3

Honestly read at your own peril, I cried a lot in this one

*spoilers ahead*

So right off the bat I played TLOU with my partner very soon after it came out, and then again.....and again......(and again) a few more times so I thought I was ready for this. I was ready for grissly asshole bill needing to go find Frank because he's only gone and got himself in some shit and yeah joel and ellie come along I know where a battery is but oh no Frank got bit?! and have a cry but did we get that? No. Do i wish we did? Absolutely not.

But i am kinda bummed we didnt get pedro pascal caught upside down shooting at zombies because of Frank's trap....thats one of my all time favourite scenes

ANYWAY

The whole set up to Bill and who he is, is done so well and with comedy too. It's meant to be ridiculous in a way that someone like bill, a prepper and lets be real we all know one, who 9/10 is called crazy is now the smart one and we see him living his best solo life in his mini town

5. Years pass im thinking huh, that isnt too long, we arent up to present day yet and then i see my boy frank in a hole and im thinking OH YEAHHHH we get some BACKSTORY

6. "there is no girl" "i know" - why did this make me laugh yet cry in the same breath? its so bloody unfair people can grow up without knowing what it is to love and be loved simply because some assholes out there made it 'not the norm' and considering how bill grew up, im sure that didnt help either.

7. "have you done this before?" "no"

8. Young joel in that sunshine? eating with that fork on a fancy plate with pedro's non grey hair and looking clean as frick? this was for the pedro simps and i APPROVE

8.5 MY BOYS JUST WANNA GROW STRAWBERRIES OK

9. the raiders hit, im thinking SHIT here we go, this is when theyre gonna kill frank and joel and ellie will show up and bill will be an asshole and joel will think nothing of it and ill be screaming at my tv and all will be right in the wor- wait what BILL GOT HIT?!

10. oh he's fine

11. Frank isn't though

12. This is where im prepping myself right? I KNEW since i started this episode that he would die, he died in the game and he's gotta die here but im not liking this.

13. Bill stop naming Frank's pills fun names im literally crying

14. Frank: "This is my last day" Me:

15. I dont need to write the speech he made because honestly if i did i'll just cry again and im writing this on my laptop and i really cant afford a new one but you all know that made you cry too

16. THEY. GOT. MARRIED. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?! ARE YOU?! BECAUSE THIS SUCCEEDED MAN YOU DID IT - WELL DONE

17. Now here i am, tears streaming down my face when you lose something you cannot replace Frank has drunk the wine, im a puddle and then Bill.....this mother fricker....downs his glass and im thinking wait a miniute here....this isnt what happened in the game

18. "objectively.....that is very romantic"

19. ........ *frank castle voice* wait wait wait wait wait WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

20. my ass is in denial right, im like nah ok bill is gonna wake up and that'll be horrifying and heartbreaking because now hes forced to live on without the love of his life and joel and ellie arrive and his door is locked and i knew this aint the way it's gonna be

21. the letter. I need say nothing more.

22. So after ALL THAT, all the sobbing and crying and pact and 'we left a window open' they're just gonna throw at me some joel and ellie bonding in the car? theyre gonna give me the game quotes of 'what you say goes' ????????????????

TLDR: EP3 was beautiful and heartwarming and then soul sucking all at once. While i didnt get my refirdgerator scene i got something so much more and I loved them for that. Now im just hoping ellie found those magasines because best BELIEVE thats another of my all time favourite scenes from the game

[velvetporcelain]

wednesday night.

in the car. it’s pouring rain. I always feel safe here.

dressed like a boy today because it’s easy, oversized everything.

plus I pretty much shoved my femininity back into my womb to protect what’s left of it. —- it’s like natural incubation— I’m really good at healing myself— but I’m also really good at sabotaging myself. anyways—- I think this is the start of something good, I’m slowly throwing it all away and keeping what i want to take with me, i can let it go— i have to let it go— it’s fucking weighing me down- it’s killing my spirit— sure it would really be easy to keep saying “I’m fine” — but that word is a bandaid for a gaping wound they refuse to clean. Obviously it’s time to let go of this pain- this self betrayal. I don’t want to erase- I want to learn- I want to remember.

i don’t want it anymore. I release everything blocking me from ascending, shining, loving. My mind is a second womb, a place to hide when im on the verge of death, reborn again, reborn endlessly—- im gonna hide, maybe I won’t come out.

Here is perfect. I have literally been spewing things from my mind, and sometimes it’s violent and sometimes it’s painful and makes me cry- sometimes it’s easy and I feel confident— sometimes I miss what I already threw away— sometimes I feel guilty— but I always feel powerful- I always feel conscious- I always feel present— I always feel eager to cleanse —

i was always fucking switching but now I feel stable and I feel clarity— and I feel like im absorbing myself like I have always wanted to — my creativity keeps impressing me and I want to express that with the same clarity that I think it. I’ve read more books than I’ve ever read in my life— again impressed— not by the amount of books- but by the fact that i can get my brain quiet enough to comprehend the content.

sleep— my window open so i can hear the rain— and im completely in love with who i am becoming and that will make me sleep peacefully.

-x

[dis--parity]

hit and miss.

Trigger warnings: Animal abuse (mostly offscreen), bullying Word Count: 1482 Author’s Notes: I have no idea WHY I put off publishing this for so long, but! Here’s an ugly little preview of Theo’s old life! When I say ugly, I do mean ugly, though... Hopefully this motivates me to actually continue the series! The rest of the story is, for the most part, present-day, and I’m excited to see how you all react to how it unfolds!

CHAPTERS hit and miss.

“Fuck! I almost got ‘im that time!” “Hey, hey, hey- he’s moving! He’s moving, throw ahead of where he’s going!” “He moved a whole two centimetres, dumbfuck! I’ll throw where I want!”

God, what a fucking racket they’re making. It’s a miracle nobody’s found out we’re here, between the thud of their ammunition - most of it missing, covering the jet black with streaks of white, I take it - the noises of protest from their target, lying prone in the middle of it all. And above all of that, their fucking yelling.

Bickering, bickering, all it ever is with these pieces of shit is bickering. I learned a long time ago that it’s not worth trying to get them to agree on one thing; everyone forgives each other at the end of the day, anyway.

It’s what Callan always told me - he’s the oldest, so everyone tends to listen to him when he’s here. 

But today, it’s me that gets to feel the pride of being the big dog. That one badass everyone looks up to, takes orders from - there’s something about it that makes every adjusting pull on my Varsity jacket feel that much more… important.

The way the fabric rubs against my shirt with a satisfying ‘fwip’ is mostly muffled, though, by the impact of snowballs on tarmac - and it’s yet deafened by the barking of a dog standing on the same surface, pacing and dodging frantically. Scarcely any of his fur has snow clinging to it, and the places it has stuck are hardly the places that count; the top of the rump, the middle of the body, the lower half of the leg.

The commotion quietens a little as the snow crunches beneath my feet. I’ve learned it’s always best to pause when you arrive at the scene - the longer I peer over the mess they’ve made, the more they feel judgemental eyes on them, peeking past strands of white, the more likely they are to listen.

Already, I can feel their heads turning towards me like I’m the fucking flagship coming into port, putting all those little sailboats to shame.

The only downside is that now, all eyes are on me. That’s one feeling I’m used to, sure - but now every movement counts. Even a twitch of the finger would be enough to sow doubt in everyone here.

The way Bernie passes me, and brings his hand gently down onto my shoulder as he walks behind me to watch, doesn’t invoke that uncertainty at all. But I don’t have time to think about that now.

I can only spare a passing glance at the others as I step up to the short wall of snow they’ve put up for cover. It’s not like anyone’s gonna throw back at us, but they’re made up of more than enough snow for me to get my hands around. I don’t even need to spare the others a look to get my intention across.

“Here, here, Theo’s gonna show you how it’s done.” “Yeah, Theo, fuckin’ get ‘im.” “Shh, shh, hey, watch this, watch this, Theo’s ‘boutta fuck it up.”

My eyes remain fixed on their quarry; a dog with cinnamon-brown fur, looks to be some kind of shepherd. I’ve seen him around when I walk past, looking out the window as I walk on past. 

It’s fine, I take a moment to remind myself as my hands ball the loose, dirty snow into a shape roughly resembling a sphere. Dogs chase after balls all the time, right? It’s not like this is hurting him or anything.

Not unless I take aim riiiiight…

“Stop! STOP! What are you doing?!”

Well, there goes my focus.

The hesitation that fills everyone around me is palpable. My gloved hands leave the clumpy snowball right back where it’s formed as the air is populated by the muttering of… what even are they to me? Friends? Or just cronies?

The classification is secondary as I look up towards the source of the sound - one that immediately bids me to rise above the man-made hill, slam a boot down as though I’m on the peak of Everest.

It’s from there that I see everything I wanted; not just the scrawny little blonde in his grey hoodie and faded jeans running in and standing in front of the dog like a fucking human shield, but the expression of fear that wells in his eyes the longer I stare him down. “The fuck does it look like?” I speak up, snowball slipping from one hand to the other. “Why’re you gettin’ in the way of our fun right now, dude? What’s your problem?”

The muttering that once filled the air dies around me. The more he trembles in front of the dog he’s guarding in what he must think is some valiant effort to do what’s right.

There’s a hot second where I’m not even sure he knows how to answer my question, until he opens his mouth again.

“Y- you’re hurting him, don’t you see that? Why are you hurting this- this poor dog? What’d he ever do to you?” “No, we’re not hurting him, dumbfuck. He’s not even moving away, look.” “Y- yes, you are! You’re throwing snowballs at him! How would you feel if I started throwing snowballs at you?”

Just as easily as I could feel excitement before, doubt now swells in the air around me. The very same I’d worked so hard to avoid. Everyone’s looking around at each other as they wonder if this is even any fun any more, if it’s even worth it. 

But, the more he talks, the more he gives me to fire back with. Slowly, I step up again, the sole of my shoe thudding onto the top of the frigid trench before me, teeth clenching as I stare right back at him.

“Are you fuckin’ threatening me, Alex? That a challenge, huh?” I scowl. “You think you’re hot shit?”

Silence. He’s either too scared, too brave, or too stupid - or, fuck it, maybe all three at the same time - to give me a proper reply. It’s a staredown, then. Just as slowly as his hands clench into fists, I’m reaching down again to get a grip on the snowball I so quickly abandoned before.

“Yeah, get ‘im, Theo!” “Oh, this kid is fuckin’ dead.” “Yo, watch this, watch this-” “Say somethin’ else or shut up, I’m watching!”

By the time I look back, his guard is down - he’s ushering away the dog, or trying to as well as he can without turning away from me.

‘Go, go, go to your dad,‘ he’s saying, like it can understand him. Maybe it can, I don’t know - but his eyes are still fixed on me. It doesn’t matter. He could never intimidate me - and it sure as hell isn’t gonna make this hurt any less.

I reel my arm back, gloved fingers tightening around the frigid projectile in my hand, and…

Boomph!

To my side, applause. To my front, the pained yelp of some runt who thought he was doing the right thing by sucking the fun out of everything. Behind that, the pitter-patter of paws against snow-covered tarmac; looks like our old target finally has a reason to panic.

But the snowball hasn’t even left my hand.

The rallying cries all around me lead my gaze to Bernie, just beside me - his eyes lock with mine for a moment as the sunlight catches his eyes. The way he grins, his eyes practically begging for approval he knows he already has… I swear it makes my heart stop for a second.

The flurry of white being loosed from hands behind him means nothing to me for a few seconds in that oasis of calm, until that fucking asshole Jan bumps into me in an eagerness to join the fray. 

Sure, I’m focused - but the way I push him right back and knock him on his ass is enough of a price to pay. It’s worth losing my snowball over as it scatters across his coat. Or so I thought - he’s still standing there. 

The dog is long gone by now, but that doesn’t mean the fun’s gotta stop. Not when I’ve finally confirmed that he’s not brave, just stupid. I crouch down again, eyes fixed on his half-glaring face, lips puckered like he’s trying so hard to be brave. It doesn’t matter how much we throw at him - even if I’m seeing a marked improvement in accuracy from everyone else.

Someone’s gotta take the wind out of this little shit’s sails. I’ve done it before. He thinks he can beat me, that he’s better than me for being able to take what I dish out.

He’s wrong. We’re only getting started.

As my hand reaches for the edge of the driveway, my fingers curl around the uneven grooves of a rock.

[payphonex]

Well, this is the first time I've written in almost 3 years. I'm not even sure what to say, honestly. I feel like my entire life has been taken from me. I feel like I've forgotten how to write.

Am i supposed to be angry? in love? sad?

lost?

Im lost. I dont know who I am anymore. I gave up everything for this toxic relationship. I stopped going to bars, seeing my friends. i stopped talking to anybody especially over text because everything would be read. I stopped taking phone calls unless i was home alone, which was rare. I learned to shut up, not talk about my emotions because it would be such a big fight; i wasnt paying attention to how she felt when i was upset. Even now, as im writing this i am terrified she'll see it.

She'll say something, she always does. She'll disapprove and ill be in trouble.

again.

We broke up, about 3 weeks ago. I moved to Tennessee. Im finally with my dad. Honestly, the only reason i didnt stay in town was because i finally had the courage to block my mom.

Maybe the universe was telling me it was time to go.

I finally listened.

I dont know how to feel anymore. What im supposed to feel, ya know? In some aspects i feel numb. Im alone out here, truly alone. I guess the good thing about that is i cant get hooked on cocaine again.

I crave it all the fucking time. Being sober for 2 years really doesnt matter when i still smell it laying in bed.

I guess i can thank my sobriety on my now ex, we did get sober together. I cant thank her enough for that.

You know, its weird being back on here. I feel like i could throw up just downloading the app. My old account was deleted, my ex swears it wasnt her but im sure ill never know.

I found you again, i re-read some of things you had written. I really have been looking through rose coldered glasses when it came to you. The pain of losing you in my life was so fucking real for months.

atleast until i realized you truly threw me under the bus. like i was just some freak obsessed with you. I loved you, you were my family.

we were 'inseperable'. Remember? you said that.

"I understand that it'll never be us, part of me knew that it never would be, but i decided to let you fall anyway. make me think it was wrong."

You remember that? you wrote that. I can finally let you know,

it.

was.

wrong.

Because youre so stuck in my fucking head that it is hard to breathe. People still tell me about you, I could never truly get away from you.

I cant forget those nights.

I never could wipe away the fucking smell of lavender and vanilla

Ive never been good at cleaning windows either. Im sure your finger prints are still covering the view i could have had.

You've always been such a good liar. Keeping my at your hip for a backup plan just long enough to leave me drowning again.

The last time i heard your voice was the night my ex called you. I was plastered, black out drunk. I found out my tumblr was deleted that night.

I hit her. Busted her lip because i couldnt let go of you. So she called you. Of course you didnt answer, but the next morning you called me off of a friends phone. She forced me to answer the call.

You sounded like you fucking hated me. Why?

because you lead me on? because you got caught up in the consequences of YOUR actions?

you responded to me! when i wrote about you. You always replied. always.

It was never "leave me alone" or "we need to stop this"

You played me. you fucking used me.

you.

you fucking hurt me.

and i shouldve known better. but youre angry at me? annoyed with me?

it was easy for you to drop me, wasnt it?

I liked one of your posts. im sure youre gonna block me now. i bet you didnt even read this.

im letting you go. i guess this is my goodbye. im moving on and it feels good to finally express myself again. dont worry, my tumblrs always been my own private thing, noone you know will see this, incase youre embarrassed.

[midnightmisadventures]

So this time we’re on our way home, i see he doesnt have any gas, so i say “you can stop here for gas” he pulls into the station and its dystopia city lol. Theres homeless people with broken limbs begging for help. Theres.....scary shit. So he goes ya know lets just get out of here.

So we’re driving and he’s being such a bad driver, constantly almost crashing. But we’re laughing about it. Then we’re holding hands, flirting, flirting. Massaging eachothers hands, being such a couple.  

And then he pulls my hand up to his mouth and i think he’s gonna kiss it. But instead he takes my two fingers (pointer and middle) and puts them in his mouth. And now its like.....hot. 

Like when i tell you i was turned on I WAS. So im playing into it, basically fingering his mouth. This is so graphic, but i can feel myself getting wet. He’s still driving but the sexual tension is building. Then he SLAMS into the break sort of. Pulls over. Idk if we home but i didnt care. He’s like...ready to fuck. So he stops the car. Pushes the seat all the way back and lowers it, and i get on top of him soooo ready lmao. I also still know this is a dream, so i dont have any nerves im just excited. Btw im wearing my yellow dress i wore to lias party. 

Anyway, now im on top of him, and i go in and kiss him but then notice. THeres puke everywhere. Like puke and drool coming out of his mouth, puke on his shirt, puke on the dash. And im confused?? And im like “uhh maybe like wipe your mouth or spit into something first” and im trying to look around for a napkin and not make him feel too embarrassed bc ew i just kissed his wet puke lips. 

THEN, the cops....or the town orderlies idk dystopia. Knocks on his window like get out whats going on, we need to search him. SO i quickly get off his lap lol back into the passenger. And the cops are like “what the fuck is going on” they didnt have any specific reason....idk it was confusing. So we were both changed out of our “school” uniform. And i think mark starts explaining to the guy that we’re on our way back from school. And hes like “yea i need proof of your uniform. preforably a clean one” so he’s looking and then the cops start searching his car and filing a report. And for some reason i was so confused as to where the puke came from and when it got there. 

So i was like “i dont understand was that ur puke” and he was like “yea it was me, i slammed on the breaks and boom threw up” and then i realize and am like “OH NO was it my fingers, did i gag you omg im so sorry” also being kinda cute about it. Like babe was it my sexy fingers teasing you?? And hes into it he’s like NO don’t apologize. Your fingers did nothing wrong, i wouldnt take that back, like i’d throw up 10 more times if it meant we got to be hot and tease eachother. So its kind of a cute funny moment, and i did like him, and i did want to kiss him more. But i just started looking around lol. The cops were here, we werent home yet. We had dystopian highschool again tomorrow lmao. I was like, this isnt worth it. This is a dream i should just cut out. Cause this can only get scarier, and what if i get in a situation where im stuck or in a scream proof room. I should just get out while i know i can, i dont feel like dealing with the authority in this dream world. 

So i leave marks side, go behind the car, and scream my lungs out. Literally it took all my might, i was worried it wouldnt work. Then i ended up in the “fake wake up” dream. And then i actually woke up.

Wasnt that a weird dream?

[bueckers-babygirl]

And Can You Make It Last Forever (kk Arnold X black!fem!reader)

Summary: Just a cute fic of y/n and kk finally dating

Summary: You and kk finally get together

She looked so pretty. How could someone look so pretty? 

Me and Kk were just sitting in her car at 1:00 am in a random parking lot, a PARTYNEXTDOOR song playing in the back. She called me from her dorm telling me that she couldn't sleep; she said she wanted to see me. I then found myself sitting there listening to her go on and on about how she was excited about the team vacation they were gonna take.

“I'm already packed and everything even though it’s like two weeks away” she exclaimed while talking with her hands. She is so cute when she gets excited. “Aw, im happy for you kk” I say with a yawn.  She looks into my eyes while taking her hand to move my curly hair out of my face. “I'm sorry i woke you up. I just wanted to talk to someone. You’re like…my favorite person to talk to” she says looking down at her fidgeting hands. I let out a tiny laugh before reassuring her that it was ok. I never want her to feel bad about anything, ever. “I kinda wish you were coming with us. It would've been a lot more fun with you” Kk confesses and she takes my hand into her’s. Her hands were so soft yet so strong. I felt my face get hot and she ran her thumb over my knuckles. I turned to look out the window so she wouldn’t see my obviously flustered face.

As the car got quiet I started to think about her and me. She’s been my best friend ever since I got to Uconn. I can’t imagine my life without her and I've only known her for a year. She is the reason I even became more social. She’s my favorite extrovert.

As I snapped out of my thoughts, I turned to see Kk already looking at me. “Whatchu lookin' at” I laughed. Kk lets out a laugh before subtly unbuckling her seat belt to make herself more comfortable. “Haha, nothing. You just look really good right now” Kk tilts her head down to not make eye contact with me. 

Me and Kk have a “will they, won’t they” relationship. Everyone wants to see us together but they also love the thrill of thinking that we will just stay friends. I have been in love with this girl since the second I saw her. She makes me laugh and she makes me feel like I can be myself around her. The only thing I hate about being in love with her is how popular she is.

Seeing other girls on campus throw themselves at her while I have to watch in the background isn’t really for me. Also seeing that all these girls are gorgeous makes me feel like she would leave my side in an instant just for them. I know for a fact that I'm beautiful but I can’t help but worry. 

I take myself out of my depressing thoughts and turn my attention back to Kk, noticing that we are still holding hands. I let out a couch trying to slightly change the subject. “Anyways, how did that date go with umm…Teagan” I said trying my best to sound interested. “Her name is Reagan,” Kk says with a loud laugh. “That’s what the fuck I said! How was it with Riley” Kk lets out an even louder laugh before leaning back in her chair. “Eh. It was alright. We ate, walked around, and then I tried my absolute best to teach her how to play basketball. That sport is not for her” she says rolling her eyes. Some part of me was excited that her date with whatever the hell that girl's name was went bad, but I couldn’t let her know that. “Well, why was the date just eh” I asked leaning back in my seat with her. Kk looks away trying to avoid eye contact with me. 

“Girl wait! What happened? Did her breathe stink? Did she talk about herself too much? Did yall fuck and it was bad?! Tell me”

“She wasn’t you” Kk finally looks into my eyes.

My breath gets caught in my throat. She’s shes said stuff like that before, all the time. But this time felt different. 

We looked into each other's eyes for a few more seconds, the greatest few seconds of my life. Suddenly, I saw Kk lean towards me and bring her soft hands to my cheek. I felt my body go onto autopilot as I leaned in, my eyes shutting on their own. After what felt like an eternity, I finally felt her lips touch mine. I know it sounds cliche, but I felt fireworks and sparks. As she deepened I noticed that her soft lips tasted like the strawberry chapstick I had given her, which only made me want to kiss her more. This was probably the best thing that had ever happened to me. 

When our lips finally parted so we could breathe, I couldn't do anything but look into her eyes for what felt like forever. I finally let out an awkward couch and tried my best to say something. “I um…that was…good” Kk lets out a laugh before taking her two fingers to grab my chin. “You are so cute, you know that” she says before leaning closer once more. 

“I think I would be even cuter as your girlfriend,” I say with a giggle. She licks her lips before giving me one more peck. “I think I’d like that Baby”.

I thought this was a bit cute so I just wanted to release it <3

[hauntedtotem]

i had such a good dream and I woke up right before I was about to kill this guy 💔

(it's ok it was deserved)

It starts out with me back in 6th grade at 11 yrs old again, but I have my adult brain and all my memories still so I'm like. "Fuck this I'm not doing schoolwork all over again/not gonna sit here and be belittled and talked down to bc everyone thinks I'm a kid" so I leave my English class, one of the teachers i didnt like starts following me because, y'know, kids can't just walk out of school- I'm taking all these extra hallways and doors that don't exist irl, telling her im an adult and trying to lose her.

Whatever, boring stuff- then I hear other teachers talking about a special field trip my class won to [redacted location] where they'll get to fly in a helicopter. And I get a final destination vision where the helicopter crashes (but everyone is fine), so I'm like. Perfect, I can take some money, go on this field trip, and escape during the commotion so I don't have to relive 6th grade.

I wasn't eligible to go but snuck on the train anyways, and the ticket guy on the train was also the operator for this helicopter thing we were doing? He asks for my ticket, I give him a crumpled up carnival ticket I found in my pocket and he's pissed, but we're already at the location so what're you gonna do, that's all I got.

Apparently because I wasn't supposed to be on this trip and no one back home knew where I was, I was reported missing and had to hide my identity. This guy was speaking outloud to our group saying if any of us are a runway then we're "selfish little bastards that deserve to suffer."

Guy was super angry about it, idk.

I sneak onto the copter, and for some reason the city was like Venice and had rivers and waterways everywhere, and one of my classmates is saying it's the river styx and freaking out about all the bodies floating down. I didn't see dead bodies, just regular people swimming around in tubes. so I was like, "dude I think that's just a lazy river". But he was adamant they were corpses/souls in anguish, (and considering the events later on in the dream his perception was probably right, but it looked normal to me?)

So, copter crashes like in the vision, I had an umbrella to shield from the shattered glass of the front window. My classmates are perfectly fine, I escape the wreckage in the commotion. I go to this other area next to the crash site with a piranha infested lake, and the angry ticket guy's stuff is there, which I throw into the lake and let it get eaten by the piranha because the guy was an asshole and yelled at me for the whole trip.

Then I swim across while the fish are distracted, there's this big marble alter on the other side. It's like a cathedral-style mausoleum or something? I hoist myself out of the lake, entering this alter.

I hear the ticket guy across the lake, pissed about his stuff being thrown in and he's talking to my coach (who was chaperoning our field trip) about how he was going to kill me, with great detail and very enthusiastically.

I can hear this all the way from inside this weird little occult place I entered, the inside is grimy and only contains this small square hole, that was a chute to somewhere. He knows I'm there, and I hear him all giddy about how he gets to throw me down the chute.

So im like, what's in the chute?? So I jump down myself, and it's like a straight drop into a body pit. It's so clogged up with the amount of corpses in there, so you don't even make it to the pit, you just get stuck in the chute and starve while being forced to lay in decomp with hundreds of rotting bodies under you, and you can't climb back out. Guy has been throwing kids down here for who knows how long.

So I'm pissed now, because this dude was going to kill what he thought was an 11 yr old child, just because I didn't pay for a train fair and threw his man-purse in a lake. And he's clearly a serial child murderer from how many bodies he had stacked in this little sacrificial pit- I assume because the location it had to be some sort of ritualistic cult thing? And maybe tied into the river styx thing going on outside idk.

Little does he know, I'm not actually a small human child, so my body contorts, limbs bending at all sorts of angles to climb out of the chute, and i hide in the rafters while he gets to the alter and walks in.

He walks in laughing, thinking he's about to kill some defenseless kid, but I'm right above him in the rafters ready to scare the shit out of him and throw his ass down the chute myself. Im sitting up there looking like an uncanny edit of the Russian Sleep Experiment animatronic, doing a worse version of the grudge crawl like:

And I am soo ready to see his reaction, and get revenge for all those victims. And then I wake up before I can even show off that I'm not human :(((